Chapter 17: The Great Chase, Pt. 1

Spike was up early that Saturday, feeling weirdly well rested. Generally, he liked to sleep in on Saturdays, but today, he’d gotten a good amount of sleep, and so, he was downstairs in time for breakfast. He met his own personal maid on the way down the stairs and she gasped.

“Oh wow!” the griffin said with a small smile. “I was just on my way up to clean up around your room, your majesty. I wasn’t expecting you to be up. I mean, I assumed you were gonna be up before lunch, maybe a little bit before, and I was thinking about how best to get you up this morning. I was considering just yanking the blankets off of you, but I can’t remember if you prefer sleeping in the nude or not, and a bucket of cold water would have been way too childish, I think, but just telling you to wake up seems like it might have been a little bit less effective and a bit more invasive, maybe? I dunno, I just don’t feel like shaking you awake is always the most effective route to take and-”

“Good morning to you too, Gabby,” Spike said with a smile, cutting off the torrent of words bubbling from her beak. He liked Gabby quite a bit, but if he let her keep going, there probably wouldn’t be an end to her talking. There were times when he loved having a nice, long conversation with her, but first thing in the morning, she could tire him right out if he let her.

“Oh, right, good morning!” She nodded again with a small bob of her head and a light ruffle of her wings. “I’ll go and tidy up your room since you’re up early, before I go and get cleaned up myself.”

“Sounds like a plan. Have you already had breakfast?” he asked.

“Yeah, don’t worry, I ate before coming here,” she promised, waving to him before hopping the rest of the way up the stairs.

The drake smiled as he watched her go. She was a sweetie, to be sure.

He hurried down the stairs, greeting a few more of the early morning crowd, dressed in his cozy Saturday morning pajamas, a simple plaid pair of pants with a matching button up shirt. As he got into the kitchen, he noticed that the staff had already prepared a morning meal for him, his aunt, and his mother, and decided to do them both a favor. He went over to the coffee machine sitting next to their fridge and started to mix up a pair of cups for the two alicorns he knew would be coming downstairs any moment now.

And as if on cue, two forms shambled in, both looking incredibly sleepy. Celestia’s usually bright and vibrant, flowing rainbow mane was flaccid and opaque, lacking the shimmering quality to it. Luna’s mane was similarly disfigured, looking more like a rat’s nest than anything. Both had heavy bags under their eyes, Celestia looking as though she was having difficulty keeping her own eyes open. She moved through a combination of instinct and the guiding hand of a maid standing behind her, lightly nudging her in various directions as she moved.

“Good morning mom, auntie. Good morning Dusty,” he greeted to each of them as they walked in.

Both alicorns gave an affirming grunt as they moved for the full cups of coffee he’d prepared for them, though the grayish-brown mare with a bright, orange mane gave him a soft smile in return. “Good morning, Prince Spike. Nice to see you up so soon today.”

“Is it really so strange to see me up this early on a Saturday?” he asked. “I am an adult, you know.”

“Adult, child, doesn’t really matter, you still sleep in during the weekend… a lot.” She grinned. “Though I bet these two wish they could do the same.” She motioned to the two mares who still looked like they were sleep walking about the kitchen, barely aware of what they were doing.

Luna, dressed in little else than a massive, oversized T-shirt reading ‘Blame my Sister’ over the front, flopped down into one of the chairs with an impressively loud ‘whump’ the chair below her giving a soft creak of protest.

Spike frowned gently. He knew that his aunt kept a rather hectic schedule, only sleeping between her duties at school and her duties as the Night Empress, but it had been a long while since he’d seen her so worn down. “Are you okay, Luna?” he asked.

“Mhmm,” she said, giving a light nod. She set her mug to the side, and began to push her hands across the table, ignoring the pancakes and milk and fruits in favor of pulling a small bowl of bananas in front of her. She grabbed one, expertly peeled it with deft, graceful fingers, tossed the banana to the side, and shoved the peel into her mouth.

Spike winced, opened his mouth to say something, and then decided it might be best to just let that situation resolve itself. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his mother take the opposite chair, her big, fluffy bathrobe tugged tightly around her chest and shoulders. She had her coffee mug in one hand, and a pot of coffee in the other. “And uh… how’re you, mom?” he asked, slowly.

She answered by setting her own full mug down, a few small splashes of coffee dribbling out over the edge before tipping her head back and bringing to pot up, attempting to pour its contents down her throat.

“Hey, hey, hey, slow it down, Celestia!” Dusty said, quickly reaching over and carefully tipping the pot back, relieving it from Celestia’s rather loose grip. “Just use the cup like a normal mare, it’ll be more than enough.”

“But I neeeeeed it,” Celestia whined, sprawling her upper torso onto the table, and reaching out in front of her, drawing a stack of waffles close to her face, shoving one into her mouth and chewing on it noisily.

“Fillies and Gentlecolts, may I present to you, the God Empress of the sun, Celestia,” Spike said, making a sweeping gesture towards his mother. She responded by twisting her head towards him, and opening her eyes just wide enough to send an effective warning glare his way. He just snickered and drew a bowl of fruit towards himself, but his amusement soon turned to concern as he watched the two very tired mares try their best to work up the energy to properly enjoy their breakfast. “Hey mom… Aunt Luna,” he said slowly, getting their attention.

“Mhmm?” they both said in unison, finally able to force their eyes open enough to actually look in his direction.

He drummed his fingers against the table a few times. “Are you two going to be okay for classes today?” he asked.

They both gave a weak nod, Luna finally figuring out what part of the banana she was actually supposed to eat, and Celestia begrudgingly lifting her coffee cup to her lips, taking a more reserved sip. “No need to be concerned, dear,” Luna said gently. “We’ve been doing this long enough that this is pretty routine for us.”

“You sure?” Spike asked. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you two this wiped out before.”

“We’ll get our second wind soon enough, hon. Like Luna said, this is pretty standard for Saturdays. You’re just usually asleep before we go.”

Spike frowned gently. “Mom… Luna,” he glanced between them, hesitating for a moment. “Listen… I know that the school means a lot to both of you, but I’m starting to think that you two might be taking on a bit too much. Luna, you don’t even have a chance to get a full night’s sleep. You sleep when you get home from your job at school, and then you go to work at night, and then you take a nap like a hour or two before breakfast and you just keep repeating that until Sunday, when I don’t think you even leave your bed.”

“My bed is… just really, really comfy on Sundays,” she argued gently, blushing.

“And what about you, Mom?” Spike asked. “You have the benefit of actually being able to get a good night’s sleep, but I know for a fact that you don’t. You spend all your time at the school taking care of things there, and then you bring most of that work home with you after it closes, and you split your evening time between finishing THAT work, and your duties as an Empress.”

Celestia rubbed the back of her head, through her messy mane, unable to deny her son’s accusations.

“Look, like I said, the school is really important to both of you. It’s basically your baby, I understand that. You established it as a means of making secondary education feel closer to a high school setting to help adults feel less self conscious about their age or ability when applying for schooling beyond what they learned in basic education.” He decided not to mention that a lot of the baggage from high school had apparently followed the supposed adults that now came to their school, now wasn’t the time for that. “The school’s been doing really well, and I get that you want to be directly involved with it… but don’t you think that the two of you are a little bit overburdened with all of this right now? There’s no shame in stepping back and letting someone else take care of things for you.”

Sighing, Celestia took another sip of her coffee before glancing at the digital clock hanging from the wall. “I suppose you have a point, Spike. And I will seriously consider your words. But right now, we’re running a bit behind. I need to get dressed and ready for magic classes, as does Luna.” She shoveled a few more mouthfuls of food into her mouth and downed the rest of coffee in an impressively quick manner. “Dusty, let’s go.”

“Yes ma’am, right away!”

“Come on, Luna.”

“I’ll be along in a minute,” she said, licking her lips as she shoved another slice of banana into her mouth. “Mmm, sweet bliss…”

“We don’t have a minute, Lulu, we’re going to be late, and I’m not going to leave those gifted youths waiting for us because you didn’t get enough banana in the morning.”

Spike’s lips almost twitched into a small smile, but he managed to keep himself from giggling by quickly reciting, ‘I am a mature adult’ several times in his head.

Luna groaned and forced herself up. “Does this mean we’re going to be changing and getting ready on the way there, again?” she grumbled.

“We don’t have time to do it in our rooms. Now come on, move that moon of yours,” Celestia said, giving her younger sister a few quick pats on her backside as she got up. Luna responded by whipping her palm against Celestia’s hind end, making her howl in pain. “OWW! What was that for?!”

“Sorry, I just thought the sun might need some heating up this morning,” she said with a grin. She took off down the hall, letting out a small laugh as her sister chased after her.

Dusty sighed a bit and shrugged. “Guess I gotta go and make sure they don’t tear each other apart before we get to the classroom… again.” She started to follow after the two feuding empresses before glancing back at Spike. “You gonna be all right?”

“Yeah, no problem,” he smiled at her. “See you later, Dusty. Keep my mom out of trouble, okay?”

“If ever there were an impossible task,” she lamented, chuckling as she jogged after Luna and Celestia.

Spike sighed and started to go through the laborious process of putting everything away and putting the copious leftovers into containers so that they wouldn’t spoil before anyone got a chance to enjoy them. He’d probably end up giving it all to the rest of the staff anyway, if they wanted it.

As he cleaned, he frowned gently, noticing a book sitting on the table among all the glasses and dishware. He tilted his head. He didn’t remember either of them coming down with a book in hand. Maybe someone had left it down here last night. Wouldn’t be the first time, and the maids tended to leave personal effects where they lay, and point them out if the owners came looking for them. He pushed a bowl to the side and picked it up, blushing a bit. “Yowza, I thought Luna said she’d stopped reading these kinds of books.” He double checked the book mark peeking out of the middle of its pages, confirming that it was indeed Luna’s, and closed the book again when he realized the page she was on used some combination of the words ‘passionate’, ‘throbbing’, and ‘firm’ at least four or five times. “Better take this back up to her room,” he mused.

He made his way back up the stairs, walking past his room to the end of the hall where his mother and aunts’ rooms sat across from one another, one marked with a large engraving of a bright yellow sun, and the other with a bright, white moon.

He opened the moon door wide and smiled as he stepped in, intending to just toss the book onto the bed and then go on his merry way.

He wasn’t expecting to run into anyone in there. And he certainly wasn’t expecting to see that someone bent over, rifling through his aunt’s underwear drawer.

They drew out a pair of black panties and gave a soft whistle as they held them up, stretching out the waistline a little. “Oh boy, Jackpot!” she exclaimed in a rather loud whisper, before folding the panties and stuffing them in a small saddle bag hanging at her side.

Spike scowled as he took in the intruder. He definitely didn’t recognize her as part of the castle staff (not that the staff made a habit of going around raiding other ponies’ underwear drawers, much less the Empresses’) and he clenched his fists lightly at the sight. She definitely looked like a street punk. Her fur was a strangely shiny looking neo blue, with a dark pink mane, shaggy and unkempt. Her mane was puffed out, making it look larger than it probably was, but her tail was cropped quite short, to the point where it was little more than a small bob sticking out from her tailbone. She was dressed in a black yukata and enough fishnet to catch a shark. On second glance, she didn't look like a street punk, more like a ninja hooker. He took a step forward, but was careful to keep himself between her and the only door out of the room. “Hey!” he shouted, loudly.

She jumped, eyes wide as she looked up from the drawer, which she’d begun rifling through again. Her eyes matched up with Spike’s and a long, uncomfortable silence grew between them. “Ummm…” she started, glancing between Spike and another pair of panties, this one a sexy, slinky red ensemble. “This is EXACTLY what it looks like, yeah,” she said, stuffing the underwear into her bag.

Spike’s eyes narrowed. “Alright, you put those back right this second,” he ordered, starting to advance on her. “Or I’m going to-”

He was cut off as she suddenly lunged at him, grabbing both of his shoulders, and then hefting herself up, almost like she was vaulting over a balance beam, flipping herself over him cleanly, and landing next to the bedroom door. “Muahaha!” she laughed, turning back to him, “A valiant effort, my scaly friend, but you see, there is no one alive who can capture Panty Raid, the greatest underwear thief in all of Equestria!” She twisted and bolted down the hall, giving a loud giggle as she did so.

Eyes narrowing, the drake took off after her, trying his best to keep her in his sight as they ran through the castle halls. “Where are the guards when you need them?” he growled.

Spike frowned deeply as he pursued Panty Raid down the halls. The way she twisted and turned, it almost seemed like she knew these halls pretty well. He wondered, had she done this before? How’d she get around all the alarms and defenses the castle had, if that was the case?

He’d have to figure that out later. Right now, he had to make sure he actually CAUGHT her, or he wasn’t going to have a chance to interrogate her.

He paused for a moment as he saw her throw open the doors to the staff showers, specifically the ladies shower. He could hear several squeals and yelps of surprise, but he grit his teeth and threw himself in, trying his best to keep his eyes focused straight ahead so that he didn’t accidentally see anything he shouldn’t have.

“Oh, hi Panty Raid!” a familiar voice said from nearby. He dashed toward the voice, blushing deeply as he came through a small cloud of steam clouding the spacious showers, only to find Gabby standing there, in a towel, wrapped loosely around her body. “Oh! Hello there, your majesty,” she said happily.

He knew griffons were casual about stuff like this, but he didn’t think they’d be THIS casual. “Erm, hi. You said Panty Raid ran through here?”

“Yeah, she just ran deeper into the showers,” she said, pointing down the line of separate shower stalls.

“Why didn’t you stop her?” he asked, sounding a tad exasperated.

She frowned, giving Spike a bit of a blank look. “Ummm…”

“Never mind, that doesn’t matter. Right now though, I’ve got to catch up with her.”

“Oh! I’ll come with you,” she said quickly, pulling the towel a bit tighter around herself.

“Are you…”

“No time to discuss it,” she chided. “If you wanna catch her, we’re gonna have to hurry!” She jogged past Spike, and the bemused dragon groaned as he took off after her, putting his hands along the sides of his face to shield his eyes from the various shower stalls and open curtains as they ran by, his face flushing as he realized that a bunch of the maids were yelping or calling out to them. Gabby even took the time to stop and talk to them. Finally, the reached the other end of the showers and burst through the curtain… into the public bath. He flushed deeply, seeing no less than five naked mares sitting there in the communal baths in the center of the room.

Damn his mother and her sense of old Romane aesthetics!

Gabby and Spike edged their way around the room, an awkward and cold silence brewing in the hot steam as Spike tried his best to look away, but found it almost impossible to do when faced with the group of mares, all of whom he knew, at least as workers.

Berry Punch had her usual lazy grin on her face, and leaned back, as though showing off her goods.

Shamrock Shake flushed deeply and pulled her upper body as deeply into the water as she could.

Twinkleshine just stared blankly at him and Gabby as they made their way around the edge of the room.

Blossomforth was blushing beet red and looked rather confused, as if she was unsure if she should be embarrassed or flattered to see the prince running through their bathing area.

When they finally fought their way through the steam trap that was the bathing area, and emerged out in the outer hall on the other end, Spike scowled as he saw the various cube drawers pulled out, clothing rifled through. Panty Raid had no doubt gone through them and nicked every pair of knickers in there. He stopped to catch his breath and inhaled deeply, pinching the bridge of his snout lightly. “Gabby?”

“Yeah, Spike?” she asked, slowly coming around to the front of him, still wrapped in a towel.

“Why did you let her get past you?”

“I um… didn’t know I was supposed to stop her,” she said after a moment.

Spike glanced at her and put a hand on his hip.

“Well I didn’t!” she said flailing her free arm.

Spike responded by reaching forward and giving her towel a firm yank, pulling it free from her body. It fell down around her ankles and the mature looking griffon let out a loud squawk and pulled her wings around to cover her chest. “Y-Your Majesty!” she gasped. “Now’s not really the time for that, is it?”

Spike’s own face heated up. “Oh get your mind out of the gutter, you feather brain,” he scolded, grabbing her by her arm and pulling her towards a bench sitting next to the entrance to the shower room.

He sat down and pulled her over his knees. “Ack! Do you really need to?” she squeaked.

“Yes. Unfortunately, I don’t have much time to take care of this properly, so this is gonna be quick, but I don’t believe in leaving this sort of thing until later,” he stated. He pushed her tail out of the way, his face heating up as she took in her pert, soft backside. It was smaller than most mares, but the griffons tended to have more slender, softer bodies to go with their slightly less powerful wings compared to the tougher bodies of the Thestrals and the Pegasi.

Now wasn’t the time to consider the state of another species’ rump compared to another. There was only one rump he needed to worry about right now. With one hand put over her wings to keep them from flapping all over the place, and to keep her waist centered over his lap.

It wasn’t the first time he’d disciplined her, but he didn’t have to do it often. She was a diligent worker and a very responsible maid… but goddess preserve her, she could be SUCH an air head sometimes!

WHAP! SMACK! SPANK!

“Eeep! Ouch! Yeep!” she gasped and squeaked, twitching back and forth slightly, grabbing his leg to keep her upper body still, but she couldn’t keep her hips from shaking.

Spike had to force himself to keep from thinking about how cute she was. He bit his lip and tensed, trying to focus more on his palm as he flicked it up and down. But the problem with that was, it meant he had to follow its trajectory every time, meaning his eyes inevitably fell on his target.

And then he was right back to thinking about how cute the griffon’s backside was.

Why was it so hard to ignore how soft and bouncy a pretty butt was?!

SMACK! SPANK! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP!

“Aww! Spike, I’m sorry! EEK!”

“I’m sure you are,” he scolded, giving her a few upward strikes on her sit spots, making her get up on the tips of her talons as he slapped, making her bounce in a slow rhythm. “Because you’re going to help me track down this Panty Raid pony and get my aunt’s underwear back.”

“EEP! Yessir!” she whined, giving his leg a squeeze. He grunted a bit, the edge of her talons squeezing hard enough for him to feel it through his pants and against his rather tough scales around his lower legs.

“Good,” he said with a grunt. He glanced down the hall. He’d have to wrap this up quickly. He started to flick his arm forward at the elbow rather than raising it up high, giving her a good, swift, rapid-fire pummeling, moving in a swift circle around her entire bottom, leaving behind a nice, pulsing, pink glow.

SPANK! SPANK! SMACK! SMACK!

“Ow! Owww! Sh-shouldn’t we get after her then?” she squeaked.

“I know, I know,” he said with a sigh. “I just don’t like leaving a job half finished.” He slowly stood her up and she hissed, rubbing and squeezing at her backside, her wings instinctively moving to her front, covering her chest. Spike was rather grateful for that.

“Owww… s-spanking me should not be a job,” she hissed.

Spike almost commented that it wasn’t really a job so much as it was a joy, but he didn’t think that sort of quip would be appreciated. Instead, he just shook his head and stood up, turning away. “A-anyway, get dressed. We have to try and figure out where she took off to.”

“Well,” Gabby said, musing as she rustled around, looking for her clothes, “Let’s see… if we came out in the outer hall, she’s most likely going to make her way out into the courtyard from here. Or maybe into the maids’ dormitories. I mean, if she was really interested in grabbing more underwear, that’s definitely where she’d go, right? Or maybe she’s worried about being caught…”

Spike snapped his fingers. “She probably assumes she lost us. Considering she took her time to ransack the clothes out here, I bet she wouldn’t have a problem doing the same in the dorms, especially since that place is probably pretty empty right now with everyone either starting, or having already started their morning shift! Brilliant detective work, Gabby.”

“Aww, pshaw, it’s nothing that impressive,” she said, giving an embarrassed giggle. “Just gotta pull this around my wings aaaand… okay, I’m ready!”

He turned back to her, nodding. She’d traded in her usual maid uniform for a more casual skirt and T-shirt ensemble. He nodded to her. “Awesome, great, let’s go.” He motioned to her and took off down the hall.”Before she takes off again.”

“Right! I’ll call Luna and Celestia and let them know about the situation,” she said, pulling out her cell phone.”

Spike stopped and grabbed her wrist, shaking his head. “No, no way. We’ll handle this.”

“Are you sure?” she asked with a frown.

He thought back to the tired, exhausted, worn out faces of his mother and aunt, how much they were struggling to keep awake or even function this morning. He shook his head firmly. “I am. They have enough on their plate already.”

“Well, you can certainly tell that she works quick,” Gabby observed as they followed a trail of loose underwear from the door leading out into the gardens from the dormitories.

“Sloppy is more like it,” Spike muttered, blushing as he looked over the trail of various panties, tangas, briefs, bloomers, and thongs left in the thief’s wake. Did they really have that many maids working here, or were they all storing extra pairs in their dorms? I was fairly certain they didn’t have THAT many live-in maids.

Then again, the palace was pretty big, almost labyrinthine at times…

Not the time to think of that, focus on catching that panty pilferer!

He glanced up and frowned, seeing a rather confused looking maid walking along the path ahead of them, gently picking up a few of the spare panties and stuffing them into a small laundry basket under her arm. Spike smiled as they approached. He recognized her. “Sunflower! Hey, Sunflower!”

The orange mare with a gold mane glanced up, a small smile gracing her perplexed face when she saw who it was. “Oh! Your Majesty, it’s good to see you!” she greeted. “Strange, you’re not usually up this early on Saturdays.”

“I wish people would stop pointing that out,” he muttered. “Hey, you wouldn’t happen to have seen a mare run by here with a sack of underwear, would you? Weird, neon-ish blue, dark pink mane, looks like she’s going to an 80’s toy convention?”

“Hmmm, nope, can’t say that I have, but that would explain all of this.” She pointed to the trail. “Wouldn’t explain how some of them got up into the trees though.” She pointed to a pair of panties sitting next to the trunk of a thick, old oak that had probably been here long before the palace had even been built. Spike could see a new decoration hanging from one of its lower branches, a pair of bright purple panties, caught on the short twig. The upper branches, however, were so thick with leaves, it was impossible to see up to the top. “Well, I think it’s obvious where she went. Gabby, could you do me a favor and take a quick fly up and-”

“Uh… n-no can’t really do that,” Gabby said, blushing.

“Why not?” he asked.

“I mean, like, she took my underwear too, so, y’know.”

“Oh… ohhh.” Spike flushed as the image of the griffon flying up without underwear on, and him able to see up her skirt fluttered through his mind. “Er, well then, never mind. I’ll just…” he flexed his shoulders and blinked as his own wings unfurled. “Oh, yeah. I uh… heh, you’re gonna laugh, but I always forget I have these things.”

“Well, you weren’t exactly born with em. They had to grow in,” Gabby said gently.

“True, but still. It would be nice if I actually took this into account more often. Anyway, I’ll just fly up there, take a quick look around, and-”

“Don’t worry, Your Majesty, I’ll take a look around!” came a call from above them.

Gabby and Spike blinked, glancing up the wide trunk of the tree. While they’d been talking, Sunflower had pulled herself up several branch levels and was fast approaching the middle branches. The dragon’s eyes widened. “S-Sunflower!” he called. “What are you doing?”

“Looking for who you’re looking for,” she called back down, grunting as she hoisted herself up another branch, hiking up her maid skirt a bit, forcing Spike to look away as she revealed a little bit more than she was probably intending. It wasn’t like it was an incredibly long skirt, but it was long enough that doing something like climbing a tree in it was very impractical.

Not to mention the shoes she was wearing. They weren’t heels or anything, but they definitely didn’t have the sort of traction someone would want for clambering up the side of an old oak. “Get back down here!” Spike hollered to her. “I REALLY don’t want anyone breaking their back here, Sunflower!”

“It’s okay!” she called. “I used to run track in High School!”

“What does that have to do with…” Spike shook his head. “Look, just get down here!” he called, spreading his own wings and giving them a light flap before flying up towards her. He grunted at the strain. He really should have taken a few more flying classes, get his strength up a bit. He crossed his arms, trying to look stern, though it wasn’t easy when supporting himself in the air like this. “Sunflower, stop. I can fly up a little higher and check for myself. You can get back down to the ground. Please, I really don’t want you falling down from this height.”

“I’ll be fine,” she insisted. “It isn’t like I’m gonna sli-”

The slick heel of her shoe slid off the edge of the branch, throwing her off balance. She tried to correct herself and catch a branch before tumbling down, but there was nothing within reach. “Welp, down I goooo,” she said with a surprising amount of calm as she tumbled backwards.

Spike gasped and made a grab for her, but he wasn’t fast enough, and could only watch as she flipped backwards, down off of the branch she was standing on. “Oh geez, I can’t look,” he gasped, covering his eyes, not wanting to watch the poor mare end up as a puddle of paste on the garden floor.

He was expecting a slam, or a yelp, or some sort of exclamation of pain. He wasn’t expecting a creak and a loud, high pitched squeal. Blinking, he cautiously lowered his arms down from his face and looked down, his eyes bugging out at what he saw.

Somehow, physics had decided to play dirty today. At some point during her fall, her skirt had flipped upwards and one of the stronger lower branches had managed to catch her as she fell… by catching the back of her panties, stretching them out, and giving the poor mare one heck of a wedgie. Well, that would explain the squeak. At least she wasn’t hurt, but her underwear, a pair of plain, white cotton panties, didn’t look like it would last long.

Careful not to let gravity take too much control over him, Spike lowered himself back down to the ground. From here, she was just out of reach, and was squirming back and forth in discomfort. “Uh… you okay?” he asked.

She managed a strained smile as she looked down at him, her voice a loud squeak. “It feels like my peach is being juiced,” she whined.

Spike blushed and winced at the mental image that particular description conjured up. “Don’t worry, just stop squirming, or your underwear might-”

Even as he spoke the words, the strain on the delicate fabric became too much. With a long, drawn out ‘RRRRIP’ noise, the front of her panties gave way, though the leg holes somehow remained firm, so instead of just falling the rest of the way to the ground, she was tipped forward and sort of spilled out of the ruined undergarments. She let out a yelp and managed to land, with a rather painful sounding thud, on her hands and knees, arse pushed up into the air. Spike flushed, eyes wide, biting his lip as he took in Sunflower’s generous backside, unable to look away after a spectacle like that (appropriate that her last name was Spectacle). Her chubby, sunflower cutie marked globes gave a soft wobble as she slowly wriggled and writhed on the ground, checking to see if anything was injured.

“Are… you okay?” he finally managed to spit out, as she slowly righted herself, sitting her bare bottom up in the grass.

“Yeah, I think so,” she mumbled, resting on her knees. “Just a bit disoriented. Urf…” she groaned and craned her head backwards, over her shoulder, glancing up at the discarded underwear, ripped and flowing in in the breeze. “Great, there goes another pair…”

“Another pair?” Spike asked, wondering what she meant by that.

The branch creaked and he turned his attention upwards, just in time to see Panty Raid hopping down to one of the lower branches. She WAS up in there! “Aww, don’t worry, little guys,” she said, snatching up the torn white cotton. “I’ve got a nice little sewing machine back at the crib with your name on it!” She grinned and stuffed the torn white cotton into her bag.

“There you are! Get down here!” Spike called to her.

“Hmmm… nah! What fun is a chase if I let myself get caught?” She laughed and leaped down off of the branch, flipping in mid air… and flopping down on her stomach with a loud WHUMP. Spike couldn’t help but wince at the sound. “Mmmph… meant to do that!” she said, hopping up and taking in a deep breath. “Anyway, byes!” she said, waving to them, twisting around and dashing off.

Spike groaned. “Damn it all! Gabby, Sunflower, come on!” he offered Sunflower a hand to help her stand up. “We’ve gotta get after her! I think she was heading towards the kitchens!”

“You ever stop to think that maybe this place is too big and confusing for its own good?” Gabby mused. She didn’t receive an answer as Spike gave both her and Sunflower a firm tug forward and the three of them took off running after the thief, who was busy taunting them out in the distance.

The run to the kitchens wasn’t too long, and it actually looked like they were starting to gain some ground on her as they approached the swinging doors that led into the royal kitchens. Spike felt another blush rising into his face, not just from the exertion, but also from the fact that there was a naked mare standing just outside of the entrance to the kitchen, , her bright, red bottom on display, and her hands on her head. Judging by her light scarlet and orange mane and tail, and very light, almost grey blue coat, it was Windy Whistles.

“Windy,” he called. “Grab her!”

The mare’s ear flicked up and she glanced over her shoulder, blinking in surprise, seeing several ponies and one dragon running towards her. She could have easily stepped in Panty’s way and stopped the mare from advancing, or at least slowed her down enough for Spike and friends to grab her.

But she didn’t. Panty just dashed past, throwing the doors to the kitchens wide, laughing. A soft stream of cursing came from inside, and Spike skid to a stop, taking several deep breaths. “Windy, what the heck?” he asked. “Why didn’t you stop her?”

“Gustaf put me in time out,” she grumbled gently, huffing. “I am not about to risk getting another hide tanning from him. He is SUCH a meanie!”

“What did he spank you for?” Gabby asked as she and Sunflower caught up with Spike.

Windy grumbled again and shook her tail a few times, hissing as the thick tail-fur strands brushed against her throbbing rear. “I was trying to convince him to put together a slightly healthier menu. I understand his stuff is super fancy or whatever, but it’s not doing the waistlines around here any favors. Would it kill him to throw in some more greens and fruit? Maybe put together a salad that isn’t baked? Oh and all those desserts that he makes! Is it any wonder why Celestia’s getting such a great, big, fat bu-” She cut herself off and blushed, glancing at Spike. “My point is, he should be introducing more healthy stuff into his menu!”

Spike groaned. “Look, we don’t have time for this. Windy, I need you to come with us, we’ve got to catch up with that panty thief!”

“So someone’s finally chasing after her, huh?” she asked. Before Spike could ask her to elaborate, she shook her head. “I would, but… time out, ya know?”

“We don’t have time for this. Windy, I officially pardon you as the Prince of Equestria, now come on!”

She blinked a bit, blushing. “W-well, okay then, I just have to grab my clothes from inside the kitchen!”

“Whatever, just come on!” Spike twisted and dashed into the kitchen, dodging around the island counter in the center and running past several sous chefs who were working on one dish or another.

“Vat is the meaning of zis?!” a heavily Prance accent said from the far side of the kitchen.

“Sorry, LeGrand,” Spike shouted as he ran through, followed by two maids and a naked mare, “Emergency! We’re after the mare who ran through here before!”

“Ach! Of course zere would be a stampede after her! Everyone interrupting me when I am trying to work!”

The large-beaked griffon let out a snarl and picked up a large metal spatula, glowering them as they made their way through the kitchen. “And you!” he said, pointing the thing at Windy as she ran by. “Vat are you doing out of ze corner?!”

“Prince Spike said he needed my help and pardoned me!” she said, yelping as Spike tossed her her clothes, which he grabbed off the counter as they sped past. Her underwear, of course, was conspicuously absent.

“I don’t care if ze empress herself said you could come out, you are being punished for wasting my time!” he growled, advancing on her.

“Sorry, gotta go, important stuff to do!” she said, trying to speed along a bit faster. “We’ll talk more about the changes to the menu after this!”

“No ve vill NOT!” he announced, rearing back and pouncing at her as she ran past him, flicking his whole arm downwards and catching her bottom, right in the center with the spatula, a resounding, butt-crushing SPAT echoing around the room.

“EEEEYOW!” she howled, as a new grid-like square was added to her bare, tender backside, the force of the blow catapulting her forward, out of the kitchen just as Spike, Gabby, and Sunflower rushed out as well.

Spike panted and stopped looking around.”I’m getting really tired of playing this cat and mouse game,” he grumbled. “I feel like we’re going to cover the entire palace grounds at this rate.

“At least she's waiting for us, Your Majesty,” Sunflower said, pointing down the hall. “See?”

Eyes narrowing, Spike glanced ahead, all the way to the next hall intersection. Panty Raid was standing there there, dancing a taunting jig, a long line of panties tied together into some sort of short chain as she swayed back and forth, sliding the pilfered panties along her butt, like she was shining a shoe.

“She's toying with us.”

“Can we rest for a sec?” Gabby panted.

Windy concurred, flushed in the face. “Please, I'd like to get dressed before Gustaf comes out after me.”

“Fine… fine,” Spike grumbled. “I just hope that she doesn’t decide to take off again…”

Just like before, Panty Raid didn’t seem very focused on actually getting away. She always kept a good distance between herself and Spike's group, but never dashing too far ahead or disappearing out of sight for long. In fact, the last few times she’d rounded a corner or dashed past an obstacle, she’d give some sort of indication as to where she went, either leaving a spare pair behind, or just waiting for them to catch up.

But it seemed that she was getting bored with the chase. The gap between them was widening and Spike had to wonder how she managed to keep up this sort of endurance when his own was starting to fade.

He pumped his legs as hard as he could, looking at the ground as he rounded yet another hall corner as they entered a more public part of the palace, only to slam right into someone who was walking around said corner. He yelped as the impact made him lose his footing and he pitched forward, landing on top of… someone. Whoever it was, they were wonderfully soft. He groaned and waited for his vision to stop blurring before slowly sitting up. “Oww… really sorry about that…”

“Ouch! Well you should be! Why don’t you watch where- Oh! Spike, is that you?”

Spike blinked and glanced up at the mare he’d slammed into. “Trixie?” He frowned and slowly got up, offering her his hand. “Sorry about that. What are you doing here? I thought you had special magic classes on Saturday.”

“Those classes are AT the palace, though I got lost looking for the bathroom again. But never mind me,” she said, taking his hand as he helped her to stand. “What are YOU doing here? And what’s got you so hot and bothered? You look like you’ve been running a marathon.” She dusted off her blue hoodie and purple skirt before pointing to his face, which was probably flushed red, both from his constant sprinting and the constant threat of seeing more underwear all over the place.

“N-never mind that. Did you see a blue mare with a messy, dark pink mane run around the corner just now?”

“You’re the only one who came around that corner while I was walking down this hall,” she said.

Spike groaned and leaned against the wall, grumbling curses under his breath. “Damn it all, she got away.”

“Spike? What’s going on?” she asked.

Before he could answer, the sound of three panting and gasping creatures drew his attention and he twisted around to see Gabby, Sunflower, and Windy rounding the corner, their legs wobbly, their faces gaunt, and their chests heaving as they tried to keep up with him. Save for Windy who wore a determined expression and continued jogging in place when they all stopped. “Hey, Spike?” Gabby said, her voice raspy, “Th-think we could take a break? I dunno how much longer I can keep running like this.”

“Mmph, it doesn’t really matter,” Spike said with a sigh. “Looks like she got away for good now.”

“Mom?” Trixie blinked, glancing at Sunflower.

“Eh? That’s your mom?” Spike asked. “I… was unaware of that,” he mumbled.

“What the heck is going on here? I mean, I know you work as a maid, but… what’s going on?” she asked. “Why are you running yourself ragged?”

“D-don’t have to worry dear,” she breathed, wiping sweat from her brow. “We’re just helping Prince Spike hunt down a panty thief.”

Spike’s eyes widened and his body went rigid. He, Gabby, and Windy all looked at her, horror stricken. The unicorn mare looked between each of them, first with a questioning look on her face, followed by a wince as she covered her mouth with both hands, seemingly realizing the slip of her tongue.

“Wait…” Trixie said, slowly turning towards Spike, her own eyes starting to widen. “PRINCE Spike? Did I hear that right?”

“Aw shit…” Spike muttered to himself.

His mother was going to kill him...

Author's Note

This chapter had a lot of name drops for staff and maids that work at the palace! Sorry to leave you guys on a cliff hanger, but the next chapter won't be done for a bit, so be patient!

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