Getting to Know Him

by SleeplessBrony

Rating: mature
Tags: Big Macintosh, Slice of Life, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Sex
Length: 16985

Rainbow Dash/Pinkie Pie/Big Mac threesome silliness.

Everyone knows that Big Mac is the finest stallion in Ponyville. But it's only recently that Rainbow Dash has decided to do anything about that. She enlists Pinkie Pie, her partner in sexy adventures, to help her seduce the big work horse. But can they get past Applejack's objections?

Yes. Yes they can. And then there's totally a threesome.

Published 2011-12-11 07:43:19 UTC
Last updated 2011-12-11 07:43:19 UTC

Stuff of Dreams

It’s hot out. Hot and bright and sunny and dusty.

A fine day for a fine day’s work.

Big Mac thuds his way up the road, chewing on a dry blade of grass. He’s about done for the day, weary and tired. In a good way. The homestead is just up ahead. Wash off, get some cold water and some grub, maybe a beer or two – that’s the plan. It’s a fine plan.

His sister is coming down the road the opposite way. She’s wandering along, looking way more thoughtful than usual. They almost pass each other silently.

Big Mac cocks an eyebrow as soon as he’s in talking range. Applejack halts and looks up at him.

“Hey,” she says.

“Y’alright?” he says. “You been wound up all afternoon. Buckin’ those trees like they did you wrong.”

“Ah’m fine. Just a wound up kind of day, I guess,” she says.

“Yeah? What kind of day is it when you take down a chocolate cake for lunch?”

She laughs it off, giving him a gentle glare.

“I’m headin’ into town for a bit,” she says.

“Got a hot date?” He grins.

“Pffft.” She rolls her eyes.

“Meetin’ up with the girls, then.”

“Somethin’ like that.”

“Aright. Might head in later myself. Thinkin’ of stopping by the pub.”

“Yeah? Maybe I’ll meet up with ya.”

She chucks him on the shoulder, all things like usual. But then she gives him a funny look – it’s a weird moment. It’s a warm, weary smile, one that sighs and shakes its head and says, “What am I going to do with you?” and does it with love. He feels an icy cut in his chest when he realizes it’s the exact same look their mother used to give him.

And then it’s gone. Back to normal.

“Applebloom’s out with the Crusaders. Granny’s nappin’. House is yours, bro.”

“Sounds good.”

They go their separate ways.

Mac veers away from the house, heading for the barn instead. There are a few barrels of water along the side with his name on them. He heads right for them, thinking of nothing but the coming soothing comfort of cool water. The sweat all over him feels all the itchier.

His eye darts to the side. His ears flick in the air. He pauses and looks, unconsciously. He sees nothing but the road and some bushes and a few trees. He shrugs and plods on.

His collar lands in the dirt with a dull thud as he slides it off. He snaps up a rusty old bucket and scoops some water out of a barrel, dumping it over his head.

“Ahhhhhh,” He sighs loudly, his eyes unfocusing for a second. He dives back in for more, ladling water all over himself.

“Wow!”

He freezes. He almost didn’t hear it over his own sighs, but someone definitely said something. He looks around.

“Quiet, quiet! He’ll see us!”

“So what?”

He squints. One of the bushes by the road is shaking. There’s no rush of adrenaline – the voices coming out of the bush are feminine and familiar. His head takes a back seat to await further developments.

“Go GO just go!”

“YOU go!”

He sits on his rump next to the rain barrels, wondering what in the hay is going on.

And then a pink mare comes tumbling out of the bush, landing flat on her face.

“Hi!” She looks up from the ground, waving. Then she hops up and comes running over to him, like nothing happened. “Do you remember me? I’m Pinkie Pie!”

“Uhhh…” More than taken aback, he talks even more slowly than usual. “Course I do. AJ’s buddy. See you all the time.”

He’s about to try to make more polite greetings when none other than Ms. Rainbow Dash picks her way out of the bushes, stumbling over while brushing twigs and leaves off of herself.

“Hey. Uh - ’sup.” She trots up to join them, posing with her wings flared out as soon as she arrives.

They’re both grinning at him, more than a little deviously.

“Um,” Big Mac looks back and forth, trying very hard to not think a wide range of thoughts. “AJ just went into town.”

“Yeah? Well, we’ll hang out ‘til she gets back.” Rainbow Dash says.

“Yeah! Hang out!” Pinkie Pie nods like crazy.

“If that’s cool?” Dash waggles her eyebrows at him.

“Sure.” Big Mac eyes them suspiciously, still keeping a tight leash on things. “Just, uh…make yerselves at home, ah suppose. ‘Scuse me for a sec, gotta put my work stuff away.”

He bows down and slips his collar back on, stealthily running his eyes over the two mares. He lingers on Pinkie Pie – she’s turned to her friend, angling her fine flanks almost perfectly for his eyes. He’s caught himself staring at her before – she’s stopped by the farm plenty of times. But he’s always kept a gentlemanly distance.

“Right, Big Mac?” she says.

“Huh?” He bolts upright, wearing his collar again.

“I was just saying how it’s been real hot out and you’re probably tired and I bet you’d like to just relax for a bit, huh?” Pinkie grins at him.

“Uh…yeah. No doubt. Heh.”

He excuses himself again and starts plodding his way around to the front of the barn. For some reason that he tries not to think about, the two young mares follow him.

“So,” Rainbow Dash darts around him like a cat, practically rubbing against him. “How you been, big guy?”

“Yeah! We never hang out with you. What’s up, Mac?” Pinkie bounces along next to him, still grinning.

“Oh, you know…the usual.”

He keeps his eyes fixed forward, just catching glances of a bright tail as Rainbow Dash circles him. He’s caught her staring at him more than a few times before – she’s real tight with his sis, always hanging out at the Acres. He can feel her eyes on him now. He can even feel that grin she always gets, hungry, almost bloodthirsty.

He dares to steal a glance at her as they walk. She’s small and skinny, but not too skinny – tight with healthy muscles. Not his favorite type, but still hot as hell. Great little body. And that mane ain’t bad, either.

They enter the barn, a warm, dusty cave of a space. Rainbow Dash hangs back and slides the doors closed behind them.

“Uh…?” he raises an eyebrow.

She just shrugs at him and joins her pink friend. He’s deeply confused – Rainbow Dash has always given him looks, but his sister had let it slip at some point that the cyan pegasus was straight-up gay. He’d come to assume that Dash just enjoyed messing with his head. Or his sister’s. Or both.

If I didn’t know any better…I’d say these fillies were lookin’ to party. Heh, boy, that’d really be somethin’.

He casts a cautious glance to the side. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie are quite obviously eyeing him up, when they aren’t nudging each other and suppressing snickers.

Naw, no way. This ain’t one o’ them dirty movies. They’re just lookin’.

He shakes his head and shuffles over to where he always hangs his collar and starts shucking it off his back.

“Oh here, lemme help you with that!” Pinkie sits up and grabs at it, shoving her poofy mane and then her chest right in his face. She smells like sweet candy.

Hoo boy, that’s…that’s somethin’. Sure is somethin’.

She runs her hooves up his shoulders as she pulls the collar off. Way more than necessary.

Nuh-uh. No way. What was it AJ said?

Proper mares. All of her friends. Ain’t no harmless fun to be had. You go all the way like a gentlecolt or you keep it in yer sheath.

Yeah, but… He watches in silent thought as Pinkie hangs his collar on the wall. He could swear she’s shaking her curvy rump right at him, but it has to be his imagination. Right?

“You’ve been working hard alllllllllll day, haven’t you?” She bounces her eyebrows at him. THAT definitely wasn’t his imagination.

“Aheh…uh…eyup.” He feels a single bead of sweat running down his temple. His stallionhood is straining at its leash, ready to snap to full attention. He jerks his eyes away from Pinkie only to fall into another trap. Rainbow Dash is digging around behind some hay bales, her firm rump waggling in the air.

Oh boy…okay, okay, these are two fine, proper young ladies. Nothing like that.

He jerks his eyes away from her brilliant tail only to see Pinkie smiling at him, hovering closer and closer. Trapped. Nowhere to hide.

They’re yer little sis’ friends. Nothing like that. Just gonna go sit and talk about somethin’ regular and boring like.

“Aha!” Rainbow Dash holds up what she was looking for, a crude earthenware jug.

“Ooooh! What’s that?” Pinkie looks even more excited.

“I know where all of AJ’s secret stashes are. I think. Most of them, probably.” Rainbow Dash says.

Nope, no way. No way we’re gonna have a sweaty threeway right here in the barn.

Dash pulls the cork out with her teeth and spits it onto the ground, taking a deep swig. She holds it out to Big Mac.

“You done for the day?” She cocks an eyebrow. She smiles. She’s got a real nice smile.

“Eyup…”

No, thanks. I ain’t thirsty.

He reaches out. He takes the jug.

But thank you for offering, ma’am.

He takes a swig. He was expecting cider, with just a little kick. Instead he gets what can only be the rawest of whiskeys. He coughs a little in surprise.

“Whoa! What’s the matter, cutie?” Pinkie almost leans into him.

“Wasn’t expectin’ the hard stuff.” He wipes at his mouth, eyeing the jug suspiciously.

“What are you, kidding? AJ is like, the biggest drunk I know.” Rainbow Dash rolls her eyes.

“Heh. Ain’t that the truth.” He rolls his eyes too, just a bit more at ease.

“This is so neat, Big Mac!” Pinkie takes the jug from his hooves. “Just hanging out, getting to know each other. I feel like we never just talk, y’know?” Pinkie says before guzzling from the jug.

“Aheh…uh…right…” He grins nervously, trying to be very polite.

“So – yeah. Talking…” Rainbow Dash trails off, looking just a bit nervous herself. All three of them stand still for a second, not making eye contact, a silent little triangle of tension.

“Whoopsies!” Pinkie jerks her hooves, dumping some of the drink right onto Mac’s chest.

“Whoa!” Mac and Dash say in unison.

“Haha! I am SO clumsy!” Pinkie taps his arm with her hoof, giggling.

“Uh…” Mac leans back on his haunches, looking down at the mess all over his coat.

“Here. Lemme get that for you.” Pinkie dives forward with a shark’s grin and, without any hesitation, starts slobbering all over Mac’s chest.

His cock twitches instantly. He freezes, staring down at her. His jaw hangs open.

Cat in a bag, this IS one o’ them dirty movies! What in the hay?

He looks up to Dash, still not sure if this is actually happening. She’s staring at Pinkie, blushing a little, her wings just starting to unfurl. She notices his stare and just grins and shrugs.

“Uh…look, Pinkie…uh…”

He’s having trouble making words, as opposed to his usual casual disdain for them. He holds his hooves straight out to the side, not yet touching the mare running her tongue up and down the hairs of his chest.

“Mmmmmm!” Pinkie moans, now running her hooves up his sides. She’s flicking her wet tongue up and down his coat, barely pretending to clean him. It tickles. He’s hard as a rock already, and he can’t stop thinking about what that tongue would feel like wrapped around his cock. He shakes his head and looks up to Rainbow Dash again.

Help? Or…what? Is yer friend for real here?

Rainbow Dash meets his eyes and glares wickedly. Then she dives into the fray.

“Whoa! Heh…”

Mac’s whole body goes stiff. Rainbow Dash practically climbs up his side and starts nipping at his neck, her forelegs wrapped around one of his shoulders. Pinkie has given up whatever flimsy pretense she had and is just making out with his chest, slowly sliding down.

Come on now, this ain’t…this can’t be.

Honestly, it isn’t the first time a mare has gotten right down to business with him. But it’s by far the most brazen. And two at once? This can’t be on the level.

Yeah, but...they seem pretty on the level. Ain’t hard on the eyes, either.

He’s risen out of his sheath, and Pinkie’s coat is brushing against his head, sending shivers into his hips. Rainbow Dash flaps her wings and crawls higher on him, nibbling on one of his ears and growling softly.

“Hoo, boy…uh…” His body relaxes under their ministrations. Except for his cock, of course. Pinkie is writhing against it, rubbing her soft belly against the hard, flat head. She giggles, looking him right in the eye as one of her hooves rubs her friend above the tail. Mac can’t look away.

Is she…is she feeling up her friend? What?!

Rainbow Dash chuckles in his ear, bucking her hips against his side a little. He slams his eyes shut.

What’s the catch? Mah life is good, but it ain’t THIS good. What the hell is goin’ on here?

“Aright, aright! Hold up a sec!”

He waves his hooves around, throwing them off of him.

“Aww!” Pinkie Pie pouts.

“What, you don’t wanna?” Dash says.

“Ahem. Uh…” He glances down at the part of him that clearly wants to. Both mares do so as well. All three of them just pass a moment admiring it.

“Wow.” Dash raises her eyebrows.

“Yeah, it ain’t that,” he says. “But, uh…seriously, what’s goin’ on here?”

Both girls avert their eyes, looking embarrassed somehow.

“Well, we were gonna ask you out.” Rainbow Dash says.

“We?” His eyes go wide.

“Really we were gonna talk first. Talk! What happened to that?” Rainbow Dash elbows Pinkie in the ribs, quite hard.

“Ouchies!” Pinkie winces. “Sorry! I can’t help it, I just wanna eat him up! Look how hunky he is!”

“Heh, yeah.” Rainbow Dash eyes him up.

“Uhhh…” Big Mac stammers in the greatest confusion of his life.

“So you wanna go out some time?” Rainbow Dash asks casually.

“Uh…sure?”

“Me too!” Pinkie Pie waves a hoof. “We were talking about how we both like you and we both want to ask you out and we thought we would both just do it.”

“But by ‘like you’, she means ‘want to have sex with you.’ And by ‘ask you out’, we really just mean get it on.” Dash adds.

“Ha!” Pinkie fumbles her front hooves together, darting her eyes around at nothing. “Haha, yeah! Just some fun sexy times. If that’s okay.”

Big Mac realizes that his mouth is hanging open. He closes it and shakes his head, still wondering if this is really happening.

“Uh, ain’t you…?” He squints at Rainbow Dash.

“Yeah, usually.” She grins, almost strutting in place. “Guess I should be straight up with you. Pinkie and I are kind of a thing.” She puts in arm around Pinkie Pie, who leans her head on her friend’s shoulder. “But we thought it would be fun to try you out.”

“It was Rainbow Dash’s idea.” Pinkie says.

“It was your idea to do him together.” Dash glares at her.

“Hee hee, yeah!”

“You gotta be f –” Big Mac starts to say.

“I mean, we can go out like all normal, if you want. But we were kinda hoping you would be cool with just doing it.” Rainbow Dash continues, ignoring him.

“Yeah, just doing it!” Pinkie gives him an intense look.

Again, he hadn’t realized his jaw was hanging open. He forces it closed and tries to take stock.

“So lemme get this straight,” he says cautiously. “You two are lovers, but you wanna get down with me just for the fun of it? Together?”

“Ha! Lovers.” Pinkie giggles. “What’s up, lover?” She kisses Dash’s cheek.

“Yeah, jeez. Way to make it sound all weird.” Dash says. “But yeah, that’s pretty much it.”

Mac’s face is pretty much blank. But his mind is running at an unfamiliar pace.

Well heck, if that’s really how it is.

Ain’t nobody around. If this is gonna go down, this would be the time.

I can’t even believe this. Once in a lifetime, right here. Stuff of dreams.

Inside, he’s grinning like an idiot. Outside, he fixes up a somber look.

“Well hold on, now. I ain’t much for just messin’ around. Can’t see how I could rightly take advantage of two proper mares like yerselves in such a way.”

The two proper mares look at him like he’s babbling nonsense.

“Whaaaaaaaat?” Pinkie almost gasps.

“Yeah, for real?” Dash almost glares at him.

“Wouldn’t be right.” He sticks his snout up in the air.

The two girls look as flabbergasted as he felt a few seconds ago.Mac laughs once from deep in his chest, a loud guffaw that startles the two mares.

“Huh?” They both say.

“Shoot, the looks on your faces. I’m just messin’ with you.” He says with a huge grin.

Pinkie and Dash glance at each other, then at him.

“Okay. Which one of you fillies wants it first?” he says.

Their jaws drop, almost in perfect unison. It’s beautiful.

“Yayyyyyy!” Pinkie clops her hooves together, bouncing up and down.

“Ha! Knew it! Total stud, right here!” Dash points at him.

“Well?” He tenses up on his hooves, staring at the round curves of Pinkie’s thighs.

“What, right here?” Rainbow Dash glances around.

“Yeah! Down and dirty in a barn!” Pinkie stomps her hooves on the dusty floorboards. “Sexariffic!”

Big Mac chuckles once. Pinkie is almost bouncing around, but her attention is on her friend for the moment. He’s about to do something about that when she has different ideas.

“Here! Dashie called dibs on first go!” Pinkie practically throws her friend to him.

“Huh?” Dash tenses up for a second, but quickly levels out. “Oh yeah! Yeah, I did.” She paces a little circle in front of Big Mac, pausing with her rump right in front of him. She flicks her tail up at his snout. “You ready for the ride of your life, big guy?”

Damn, she’s full o’ fire! I like her!

He answers with a brutal snort and steps forward, running his nose up her sleek back. Her wings pop out straight instantly, and he feels her tense up on hoof edge as he slides his snout up to her withers.

“Yay! Ohmygosh this is so great!” Pinkie is jittering with excitement. She climbs up on Dash’s shoulders a little, leaning in close to Big Mac’s face. “Just be good to her! It’s my Dashie’s first time with a colt!”

“Pinkie!” Rainbow Dash glares over her shoulder, then points an embarrassed chuckle at Big Mac.

“Is that right?” Mac raises an eyebrow. He didn’t think he could get any harder, but somehow he does.

“Yeah, well - whatever.” Dash bucks her hips backwards, thumping her rump against him. “Don’t hold back on me, now.”

“Wouldn’t think of it.”

But he is thinking it. She’s so small next to him – he’s used to dealing with some measure of size difference, but Rainbow Dash is another thing entirely, a lightweight racing machine. His second head is relishing it, yelling at him to just mount her and pound away already, hoping she might scream. His actual head is hemming and hawing, terrified she might scream.

He shakes his head, trying to focus on the good points of her smallness. He slides his nose back down to her hips, trailing down the steely muscles around her wings. His cock is straining at itself, it feels like he could explode any second now.She bows down on her forelegs, shaking her flanks up in the air. Her tail is flicking all over his face, blinding him with colors. He smells…

Oh Celestia that SMELL.

The smell of excited filly. It’s amazing. He takes a deep sniff of her, right above her tail base, just sucking it in. It makes him shudder a little.

“Come on, man! I’m dyin’ here.” Dash shakes her rump right at him. Pinkie is still leaning on her friend’s withers, grinning at him.

“Yeah! Come on, Big Mac! Let’s see some action!” She pats a hoof on the small of Rainbow’s back.

He snorts again and climbs up her rump, mounting her. He feels the sigh of breath escaping her as he weighs her down. He gingerly hooks his forelegs over her bright blue shoulders, keeping his weight mostly on his hind legs.

“Yes! Yes! You ready, Rainbow Dash?” Pinkie’s almost right in Mac’s face.

“Born ready. Bring it on, stud!” Rainbow Dash glares at him over her shoulder.

So – she’s just gonna sit right there and cheer us on? I mean…sure, okay…why not?

He can feel Dash’s tail flagging against him, tickling his lower belly. Every bit of her under him feels sleek. She’s made entirely of tight, firm muscle. He prods his head against her slick entrance and hovers there, nickering and savoring the moment. He can feel her winking against the head of his cock.

“Come on, I said bring it!” Rainbow Dash barks.

He grins and bows his head, nudging his snout against her cheek. She turns to say more over her shoulder and he kisses her, nice and rough. He doesn’t know her all that well, but he knows enough about her to bet that’s the way she likes it.

It’s a winning bet. She holds still for a second but quickly catches up, pushing back with her snout and biting his lip. Her tongue is just as quick and flighty as the rest of her, darting all around his.

She breaks the kiss. His eyes dart over to Pinkie Pie – she’s watching them with her lips in a perfect, amazed O.

“Not bad, man, not bad.” Dash is panting a little, her cheeks just lightly flushed. She arches her back, rubbing into him. “Let’s do this.”

Mac smiles again and snorts into her mane. He pushes with his hips. She’s tight, not quite as tight as he expected somehow but still small and tight.

“Oh MAN!” She gasps, bowing her head to the floor.

He snorts again and keeps pushing, feeling her squeeze against his thick cock as he slides in. It’s incredible – he stops thinking completely, letting good old horny lust take over. She’s a lithe little wiry thing, and it’s the same between her legs. He buries his face in her mane, tensing his forelegs against her, steadying her for his thrust.

“You got this, Dashie! You can do it!” Pinkie is stroking Rainbow’s mane, right next to Big Mac’s snout.

“Course I – nnn – do! This is – hnng! – awesome!”

Her flanks are shaking against him. He’s bucking back and forth a little, gently, working his way into her. She slowly unclenches around him, letting him in another inch or two with each stroke.

She gasps a few times and then moans, a long, drawn out satisfied wail. He’s almost in to his balls now, squeezing his eyes closed as he slowly works his way home.

And then he’s in. His hips meet her tight little rump, resting on her flanks, crushing her tail between them. She’s sealed around his shaft, a perfect, hot wet vacuum.

He can feel her chest heaving under him with each breath. He bites the back of her neck, nibbling softly.

“Ah!” An almost girly moan escapes her mouth.

“Doesn’t it feel good?” Pinkie says, still leaning on her friend.

“Uh – uh huh…” Rainbow Dash groans.

He pulls out to the tip in one long, slow stroke. She gasps loudly, clenching against him.

Pinkie strokes her mane, whispering something into her ear. She’s casting a sidelong look at Mac the whole time, and then she winks at him. He was going to start a little slow, with nice long strokes. He can’t.

He rams back into Rainbow Dash’s tight, clenching wetness, all the way to the hilt.

“Gah! HELL yeah!” Rainbow Dash growls, all tomboy bravado again.

He pulls out halfway and strokes back in, then in and out again, diving right into a nice even pace. His hips make a light thwack against her ass every time he drives home.

“Yeah! Go, Mac, go!” Pinkie cheers.

Somewhere far away in his head Pinkie is weirding him out a little, but it’s far overshadowed by how much she’s turning him on. He pushes into Rainbow Dash, trying not to go too fast, holding back a little. He’s trying to be careful, but it has a welcome side effect - she’s squeezing so tightly against him, he doesn’t want it to end.

“Ah! Ah! Yeah! Ah!” Rainbow Dash almost grunts out.

Pinkie Pie is still stroking Dash’s mane, kissing her neck and nibbling on her ear occasionally. She doesn’t take her eyes off Mac the whole time. He grunts, trickles of sweat starting to run down his temples.

Thwack thwack thwack

He sighs, tearing his eyes away from Pinkie’s so he can just revel in the soft wet muscles sliding against his shaft. He dives his snout into her mane again. He wants to bite it and yank her head back. He wants to ram her down against the floor and really slam her. But he doesn’t.

Soft, tight clenching. Sliding back and forth, tingling in his head as it pushes her apart. He moans almost silently.

Rainbow Dash stops moaning. She stops reacting at all, her body going stiff under him. He loses his rhythm.

“Is that all you got?” Rainbow Dash glares at him over her shoulder.

“Huh?” He halts, completely confounded.

“Jeez.” She’s panting, despite her eye roll. “I’ve been fucked harder by Pinkie Pie.”

His eyes go wide.

“Oooooooooh! Smack!” Pinkie grins at him.

His mouth works wordlessly.

Is THAT how it is? Hot damn…

She’s right. He was holding back. He grins madly and narrows his eyes.

“Aright, aright, you got me.” He chuckles. He pushes Pinkie to the side, firmly but gently. Then he sweeps a foreleg over one of Rainbow Dash’s arms, pulling it up behind her.

“Oof!” She’s pushed against the floor of the barn, pinned under his other foreleg. He feels her chest jump as he slides into her again – at this angle he can get in a little deeper. He flexes his hips against her rump, sliding her torso against the floor. Then he bites her mane and yanks up, hard.

She howls out loud, clenching her walls against him even tighter.

And then he starts fucking the absolute hell out of her.

“Wowie!” Pinkie Pie gasps.

He snorts and lets go of Rainbow’s mane, focusing on just pounding into her. It’s amazing – that naughty feeling of ravaging a mare, right on the edge of pushing it too far, just laying into her. Her back hooves lift a few inches off the floor with each stroke.

“YEAH! That’s – Ah! – more – Ah! – like it!” Rainbow Dash yells out.

He smiles, slamming his hips into her ass over and over again. It’s fine - she’s loving every second of it. That makes it okay – heck, that makes it more than okay. That makes it incredible.

THWACK THWACK THWACK

He lets her foreleg go and slides his hoof up her back, stroking it along the leading edge of one of her wings.

“GAH HOLY CRAP!” Rainbow Dash squeals in glee and then trails off into blubbering nonsense.

He grins deeper. Pegasus mares - too easy. He ruffles his hoof through her feathers, feeling her insides go wild as she starts coming, spasming and gripping so hard it pinches him. Hot, wet fluid trickles down his balls each time he rams into her.

His balls tighten up – not even he can last long under such conditions. She’s quivering and moaning under him, her tongue lolling out as she pants. Her tail swishes back and forth, whipping his belly.

He closes his eyes, still caressing her wing. No, he can last, no doubt about that – he’d never brag out loud, but he’s always been proud of his own prowess. Just have to find a good rhythm and roll with it, probably work on her a few more minutes, no problem…

He glances over and almost loses his pace when he sees Pinkie Pie sitting on her rump with a hoof between her legs, clopping furiously. His eyes automatically look down to her wet hoof, rubbing between her lower lips. His jaw goes slack.

She pauses as soon as she notices him watching. She grins sheepishly, shrugging. It’s adorable. Her face is flushed, and her poofy mane is teased out more than usual, messy like bed head.

“AH!” His cock twitches and jerks. He feels that familiar rush, that falling feeling all over his body, his whole being focused on the rising tension in his dick. He pulls out at the last second.

“Oooooohhhhhhh…” Rainbow Dash moans long and loud.

Mac grunts and neighs, coming the moment he slides out of her. He shoots one huge white streak after another onto her blue backside, not aiming or thinking, just unloading. Her tail falls after a second and he even shoots a bit onto that, something he would normally watch out for.

“Aah! Guh -!” He grunts as his member spasms a few more times, empty for the moment. He leans back on his haunches, trying to catch his breath.

“Hah, hah, ah…ahhhhhhhhhh…” Rainbow Dash moans out, coming down. Her legs are still propped up on locked knees, shaking.

His eyes lazily wander over his handiwork. Her tight rump is painted with streaks of his making. He almost chuckles. It’s deeply pleasing, for reasons he’s never really been able to articulate.

Rainbow Dash glances over each shoulder. Her face is glowing – she’s got that beautiful, satisfied smile they always get. Hers is nicer than most.

“Damn. I guess that was okay,” she says. Her face isn’t quite so haughty.

“Heh. Shucks.” He says between deep breaths.

But then she scowls at him.

“Aw, man – you got it all over me.” She stomps her rear hooves up and down, flicking her matted tail in the air. “You shoulda just done it inside.”

Mac makes a face so priceless it makes Pinkie Pie giggle.

“What?” he stammers. “What are you, crazy?”

“No, no, it’s cool, I’ve been eating that one plant, uh…whaddyacallit, you know, that one.”

“Sylphium?” Pinkie Pie offers helpfully.

“That’s it!” Dash points a hoof at her.

Mac just hangs there in shock.

You don’t even know what it’s CALLED?

Further thought on that track is completely derailed, however, by something amazing happening right in front of him.

“Whoa!” Rainbow Dash jolts, “Pinkie! Heh – Oh! Ahhhh…”

Mac can’t believe his eyes.

This really is one o’ them dirty flicks. I think I even seen this one.

Pinkie Pie is running her tongue all over Rainbow Dash’s rump, kneading the firm flesh with her hooves. She licks his seed up as if it were delicious, pausing now and then to flick her tongue into Dash’s gaping slit.

Rainbow Dash moans as her hind legs finally give out, slumping to the floor. Pinkie rolls her onto her back and keeps at it, barely missing a beat. She giggles as she greedily eats out her friend, right in front of him.

Shoot, this is better than a movie.

Pinkie waves her rump in the air right at him. It’s different from Dash’s in almost every way – a big, round, slightly chubby pink cushion. Her dark pink lips are swollen and spread wide from her solo play. It’s practically waving hello at him.

He licks his lips unconsciously. He glances down at his dick – hard as stone, raring to go. He looks back up.

Pinkie runs her tongue up Dash’s thigh and then shoots him a look over her shoulder. She bounces her eyebrows at him and grins, thwupping her tail up and onto her lower back with one little buck of her hips.

“Hey! Come on, don’t stop.” Rainbow Dash yanks Pinkie’s head back between her legs. She sighs and stares off into the rafters as Pinkie loudly goes back to work.

Unbelievable. The thing happening right here in front of his eyes is unbelievable. So much so that he almost gets lost just watching.

Pinkie Pie starts shaking her rump at him again. She’s completely laid out for him, just there for the taking. He licks his lips again.

“Oh! Neat!” Pinkie’s head shoots up from her friend, but Mac doesn’t see it. He’s snout deep in her slit, licking her up and down. She’s plump and soft and soaking wet, just a pure joy to taste. He could swear he even tastes a faint hint of cinnamon. He meant to just give her a lick or two and then mount her, but he gets stuck where he is.

He hears her muffled moans – she must be busy with her friend again. He smiles and nuzzles her folds with his snout, lapping at the hood of her clit with his big, rough tongue. It’s been a long while since he went down south like this – he loves it. He never got why other stallions are always complaining about it. He chuckles silently.

Sweetest part of a mare.

She moans again, louder but still muffled by another lovely set of lips. He smiles and rubs his tongue back and forth, feeling her nub get harder under it. He could sit here for whole hours, just drowning in the delicious smell of her.

“Hey! No fair, he didn’t go down on me.” He hears Rainbow Dash say.

He smiles again, chuckling in his head.

Plenty of time in the day.

“Good idea!” Pinkie’s voice.

“Huh?”

Suddenly that big beautiful rump is gone and he’s nuzzling air. His face is pulled forward, and then he’s staring right at Rainbow Dash, freshly cleaned by Pinkie’s tongue. The pink earth pony is squeezed under him, pushing him by the chin into her friend.

“Switch places!” Pinkie yells.

“Uh…” He stares at Rainbow Dash, almost into her.

“Alright! Let’s see what else you can do.” Rainbow Dash growls, pulling at his mane.

He resists their hooves for a moment. He was just…in there. The idea of possibly licking up his own issue crosses his mind for a moment, and he has to suppress a grossed-out shudder.

I mean…I guess Pinkie cleaned her up real good.

True, she looks fresh as a daisy. But…

Come on, Mac. Cowboy up!

He dives in, lapping at her right up the middle.

“Nice!” Rainbow Dash gives out a short moan. “Man, is there anything about you that isn’t big?”

He rolls his eyes.

Yeah, never heard that one before.

But it’s fine. He runs his tongue up her slit again and again, teasing it around her entrance each time. She seems to like it – seems to love it, if the noises she’s making are real at all. He’s loving it, at least – she’s wet as can be, with a weird, saccharine taste. He would almost call it a little spicy, but that doesn’t sound quite right.

He feels Pinkie start kissing his neck and jaw, even as one of her hooves strokes his shaft. She squirms under him, resting on her side, her fat rump pressing against his lower quarters. Her soft tail thwups up against and across his cock, teasing it around. She’s perfectly set up for him, even with both their heads practically resting in Dash’s lap.

He squares up his hind legs, getting ready to thrust into her. It’s a little hard to concentrate while sticking his tongue into her friend, but he’s working his way around to it. But then she nudges his head to the side.

He blinks a few times. That’s the second time his meal’s been interrupted. He looks down and Pinkie is loudly and sloppily licking Dash’s clit, as if he wasn’t even there. He gets a naughty smile and presses with his hips, jabbing the tip of his member into one of Pinkie’s soft cheeks.

“Hey – I wasn’t done with that,” he says. He nudges Pinkie to the side, jabbing with his hips again. Again, he meets her soft rump, and he feels her wriggling under him, trying to angle herself better. He goes back to lapping at Dash.

Pinkie growls in his ear and starts kissing and biting his cheek, even as she raises a leg and twists her hips around. He’s so close, he knows it, his tip is sliding down her voluptuous curves, poking around blindly. He feels her head push his to the side again.

“Grrr! My Dashie! Hee hee!” She nuzzles and licks at Dash, but her eyes are on him, daring him to play some more. He kisses her ear and then nibbles on it, running his nose into her thick mane as he tries to tug her to the side with his teeth.

“Ladies, please – there’s plenty Rainbow Dash to go around,” the blue mare says.

Mac glances up – Rainbow Dash is lying back, resting her head on her hooves, cool as can be. She’s even got…

Where in the hay did she get sunglasses?

…propped up on her mane. The thought goes away instantly – he thrusts again with his hips and feels hot, plump lips part along the head of his cock. He sees Pinkie’s eyes go wide as he slides against her, and she stops licking at Dash.

“Ooooh!” She squeaks loudly. His heart pounds at the sight of it. He snorts, riled up beyond belief, desperate to pound his maleness into some hot filly – no, into her. He pushes into her a little, sighing as her thick folds slide past his head.

She looks up at him, her face settling into pure, relaxed bliss. A wide, almost drunk smile, staring off into space. It feels a little different, coming at her from the side like this – her muscles clench along the top and bottom of his shaft. It’s a most welcome change.

He pushes more, sinking into her. Her face comes to, and she darts up and kisses him hungrily. They lock lips for long seconds as he slides inside of her, resting their heads against the heat of Dash’s lap. He can taste the other mare on Pinkie’s lips, mingled with her own tongue.

He rams home with a jolt, feeling her luscious flank press into his legs.

“Oh!” She breaks their kiss and leans her head down, flattening her crazy mane all over Dash’s firm thigh. Mac snorts loudly and flexes his hips, just holding inside her as deep as he can go. She’s got that dazed smile again, completely satisfied.

“Damn.” Rainbow Dash mutters, teasing her hoof through Pinkie’s mane. Mac runs his snout through that same mane, taking his time. He’s imagined giving it to Pinkie in a few of his lonelier moments – he’s fantasized about both of them, to be honest. But he was never bold enough to imagine this.

Now he’s inside one, with the other laid out right in front of him. Life is funny.

“Wow…” Pinkie says breathlessly. She’s panting, a light sheen of sweat shining on her brow. She still has one leg cocked up in the air to let him in. She lowers the leg, and her wet passage squeezes around him.

“Damn…” Big Mac mutters, shuddering at the feeling of her body wrapped tightly around his cock.

“Gosh!” Pinkie gasps out. “Mac?”

“…Yeah?” He barely looks down, just reveling in the sensations.

“Give it to me, Mac!” Her eyes are wild, full of lust.

“Yeah?” He returns the look, gritting up to really give it to her.

“Yeah!” she says. “Give it to me like a…like a big, sexy, sex stallion!”

“Uh,” he pauses.

Okay, she’s a talker. That’s fine, that…yeah, shoulda figured that one.

“Pound me like a hot, sexy pound cake! Rut me like it’s my birthday! Perform sexual intercourse on my body!” Pinkie says.

“Huh?” Mac pauses, still throbbing inside her.

“Take me like a bowl of potato salad sweating in the summer – mmmf!”

Rainbow Dash yanks Pinkie’s head and shoves her snout back between her legs.

“C’mere, you.” Rainbow Dash says. She looks up at Big Mac. “She does that. Just roll with it.”

Pinkie licks at her friend without missing a beat, moaning and slobbering all over her. Mac’s confusion fades instantly. It’s weird – he usually isn’t into watching two mares go at it. Porn of that variety has never done as much for him as the usual stuff. But right now, it’s his favorite thing in the world.

He shuffles his back legs a bit, squaring up his stance. Pinkie wriggles under him with each small motion, her round pink rump rubbing against his coat. It’s heavenly – Rainbow Dash is plenty fine, no doubt about that, but he’s always preferred a mare with a little more meat on her bones.

He pulls back with his hips, taking in a deep breath. He feels pinkie do the same under him, pausing at her oral duties. He holds there for a second, hovering with just his head inside her.

He thrusts back in, letting out a hot breath right against her neck.

“Mmmm!” Pinkie moans in delight. Her mouth is clamped around Rainbow Dash’s mound, French kissing it lovingly. He drives in right to the hilt, feeling her wonderful ass flatten against him.

“Ah!” Rainbow Dash grins at him. His thrust sent Pinkie’s whole body bobbing, jabbing her head into the blue mare’s lap.

Oh, this is too good…

He snorts loudly and thrusts in and out and in and out again, settling right into a nice, steady pace. Pinkie Pie takes it like an expert – she squeezes against him as he pulls back and relaxes as he thrusts in, perfectly timing it to his strokes. She’s massaging him with her inner walls, a master of the art.

He barely holds on, going just slow enough to not come right away. He throws a little extra oomph at the summit of each thrust, jogging Pinkie’s body and pushing her head into Rainbow Dash.

“Mmmm! MmmmMMM! MMMMM!” Pinkie moans loudly, her mouth still full of her friend’s flushed folds.

“Aw, yeah!” Rainbow Dash drops her haughty posing, throwing her head back as she’s fucked by Pinkie’s tongue.

Mac closes his eyes and nuzzles against Pinkie’s mane, contorting his face into an almost-scowl. Everything about her, from her rump to her mane, is soft and thick. He’s sweating, pounding into her a little harder again and again, trying to get his head in that weird limbo of enjoying it but not thinking about it too much. Just riding the waves of her supple rump against his hips, her squeezing walls against his shaft.

He creaks his eyes open and glances up. Pinkie’s forelegs are wrapped tightly around Rainbow Dash’s thighs. Dash is resting her own hooves on Pinkie’s, a tender touch as they’re locked together. He drags his eyes up and is startled to make eye contact with the blue pegasus.

She’s panting, her cheeks flushed a little pink. Her face is twisted up – she would look to be in pain at any other time. Their eyes meet, both of them bobbing back and forth as he thrusts and pushes Pinkie into her. Her splayed-out wings drag against the floor.

She forces a smile, almost shrugging. He smiles back and then quickly closes his eyes, diving back into Pinkie’s mane. It felt strangely awkward for a second, but it’s gone the moment he looks away.

It has to go. Doing Pinkie is more than heavenly – it’s just perfect. Their bodies slide together as he thrusts, feeling every inch of her pink, curvy self under him. He pushes harder and faster, sliding easily into her with every stroke. He doesn’t slam her like he did her friend – he doesn’t have to, just rolling against her, firmly but smoothly.

He runs his snout deep into her mane.

Gosh, she really does smell like candy.

He feels himself panting. She’s moaning, he can feel the vibrations in her chest against his, more than he can hear it.

“Ah! Ah! Right there, Pinks. There. Ahhhh…”

Rainbow Dash he can definitely hear.

His hips jerk and spasm, almost pushing him over the edge. He’s getting closer. He picks up speed, ramming into her over and over.

She tears her mouth away from Dash’s clit, gasping for breath. She cranes her neck up, nuzzling against the side of his face. He closes his eyes and nuzzles back, gripping her tightly with his forelegs.

His hips tremble again – she’s breathing against him, high-pitched little squeaking moans escaping with each pant.

“Mac?” she says. She reaches up and back with a foreleg, wrapping it around his neck and squeezing him against her. Her other hoof rubs Rainbow Dash’s clit.

“Uh-huh?” Mac mutters.

“Are you gonna do it?” she pants out, almost into his ear.

He can’t answer right away, lost completely in the sensation of his cock driving into her, spreading her wet, clenching self.

“Where do you want it?” he mutters.

“Just tell me when.”

He grunts and picks up speed, rising closer and closer.

Rainbow Dash answers with a grunt of her own. And then his nice, smooth rhythm is interrupted – Dash is grunting and scootching, sliding under Pinkie and pushing her up. He halts for a second while the girls reposition themselves.

“Dashie?” Pinkie moans quietly.

“Hold on. Here – no, here. There. There!” Dash says.

He holds on tight. Pinkie bucks and moves under him – he’s inside her as she slides her hind legs under herself, rotating her hips ninety degrees around his member.

“Ah! Goddamn!” he barks out.

“There.” Rainbow Dash says with a smug look.

They’re both stacked under him now, a neat little sandwich with Pinkie in the middle. Dash is on her back underneath her friend – he can feel the heat from her nether lips against his balls. Pinkie’s round rump is firmly pressed into his hips now, and she’s still nuzzling her face into his.

He starts bucking into her again, picking up right where he left off. Rainbow Dash starts kissing and nipping Pinkie’s neck, growling softly.

“Ah!” Pinkie gasps out, pulling at his neck with one arm. “AH!”

He joins in with Rainbow Dash, kissing and nibbling up the other side of her neck. He can feel Dash bucking up into Pinkie as he rails her, crushing her hips between them.

“OhmyGOSH!” Pinkie yanks at his mane, still squeaking with each breath. “Yes! Give me…gimme…like…AH! Like…me…ah…”

Her controlled massage is getting spastic, trembling against him as he fucks her, really fucking her now, slamming his whole length in and out with each stroke.

“Do me like a…like a…oh…ohhhhhhh…” Pinkie trails off into moaning.

“Ha! What’s wrong, Pinks? Nothing to say? For once?” He can hear Dash’s grin, even while squeezing his eyes shut tight and pressing his face against Pinkie’s soft neck.

“I…ah! Ah! Mmmmmm hnnnnnnn -!”

Her arm grips tighter at him. She’s coming, her whole body tensed and trembling between them. She holds her breath and shakes silently, her hips tightened like a quivering fist around his thrusting cock.

He hears Rainbow Dash growl, biting at the base of her neck.

“Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! AH!” Pinkie starts panting out squeaking little gasps. She’s rolling on this orgasm, riding it between them as Mac keeps pounding away at her. It’s too much.

“AH!” He grunts into her neck. “I’m gonna…I’m gonna…!”

Before he can even tell what’s happening, he’s on his back – Pinkie’s on top of him, frantically crawling down into his lap. Cold air bites at his wet dick for just a second as she climbs down him and then he’s wrapped in a different warm wetness.

He looks down, gasping for breath. She’s looking up at him with his dick in her mouth. He feels her tongue lapping quickly at his head, stroking around it in little circles.

He stares. Her bright blue eyes are huge, just stunning, staring right back at him.

“AH!” He throws his head back as he comes. He feels himself splashing into her mouth and against her tongue, spurting again and again. His hips buck and jerk, but she holds him steady with her hooves as she takes his entire load in her mouth.

“Ah! Damn! Ah!” He thrusts up weakly as he finishes, finding the strength to lift his head again. She’s still staring at him, smiling with her lips sealed around his cock. He watches in awe as she takes him in past the head, squeezing with her lips.

“Ahhh~!” He trembles. She squeezes a few more drops out of him, running her tongue up the underside of his head. He feels her swallow, and she winks at him, not breaking eye contact the whole time.

“Wow.” Rainbow Dash is lying right next to him, watching the whole thing.

Pinkie giggles with her mouth full, lazily licking at his head. It starts to hurt, in that tickling, over-sensitive way.

“Okay, okay,” he mutters breathlessly. “Gimme a sec here.”

She releases his cock, letting it land with a wet slap against his belly. He keeps his head propped up – he can’t take his eyes off her. She smiles up at him, lazily running her tongue around the base of his shaft.

“Wow. Pinkie.”

He glances over and Rainbow Dash is still watching, idly rubbing a hoof between her legs.

“Did you really swallow all that?” she asks.

“Mmmhmm.” Pinkie smiles wider, glancing over at Dash as she tenderly kisses his still-throbbing member.

“Wicked. Kinda gross. But hot, I gotta admit.” She nudges Mac with a hoof. “Guys like that, right?”

He darts his eyes back and forth. The two mares are both flushed, manes all a mess, glowing with recent pleasure. They are perfection, sirens, more beautiful than an almighty Alicorn.

“Yes indeed. I like it, anyway,” he says with the biggest smile possible.

“Yeah, I could tell.” Dash chuckles. “Hey, is he still hard?”

“Mmmhmm!” Pinkie’s eyes flash as she kisses up his length.

“Awesome! Move over.” Rainbow Dash climbs on top of him and sits in his lap. She rocks her hips, sliding her lips up his cock. “There’s something I wanna try.”

His eyes go wide.

Dang! These mares are just – dang!

Not a problem. He lies still, letting her do whatever – it’s her turn, this is fine, this is all fine.

“I wanna ride you this time.” Rainbow Dash grins down at him, still bucking into his hips. “You up for it?”

He snorts, busting out a daring smile of his own.

“YOU up for it?” He raises one hoof and brings it down hard on her rump, sending a sharp slap ringing through the barn. Her hips jerk against him.

“Ha!” She flashes him that smile again, that winning, rogue’s grin. She leans her face down close to his, sliding her entrance along his head, teasing.

“I like you, Mac,” she says, parting herself against him. “You’re a pretty cool dude.”

She rests her forelegs against his chest and kisses him, holding her tongue back. At the same time, she presses down and back with her hips, impaling herself on his stallionhood.

It tickles and hurts just a little, feeling almost too good. He could’ve used a few more seconds to come down, but Rainbow Dash clearly isn’t in the mood to be patient with him. He rolls with it, knowing it’ll even out in a minute or two – she can ride him this way for a good long while.

She breaks the kiss and leans away, arching her back as she sits on him. He runs his hooves up her sides and chest as she slides down, watching her wings slowly splay out as he enters her.

She’s just as wet and tight as before, but she takes him all greedily. Her rump comes to rest on his hips, forcing him into her with an audible squelch. She bites her lip and rolls her hips around, staring off into space.

Mac sighs and lays his head back – this is paradise, gifted to him for one ridiculous afternoon. Here he is, being ridden by Rainbow Dash, his dick still wet with Pinkie Pie. Never in his wildest fantasies…

“Man,” Rainbow Dash says, “This beats the fake ones by like, a MILE.”

She’s bucking her hips now, just a little, riding on top of him with his member deep inside.

“I know!”

He looks over and Pinkie is lying next to them. She strokes his arm, grinning like mad again.

“Well, except for maybe the shaky ones,” she says.

“Heh, yeah.” Rainbow Dash chuckles and then grunts. She smiles as she rolls against him, stroking inside herself with his stiff cock.

“Haha, they’re all like, bzzzzzzzzz!” Pinkie shakes his arm.

“Uh…” He searches for some kind of response.

“You better do something with her, too,” Rainbow Dash says. “Or she’ll just go on like that while we do it.”

“Oooh, yeah!” Pinkie Pie jumps up on her hooves. “Me too, me too!”

Before he can say anything, she jumps up and plants her back hooves on either side of his head. Then she sits her thick pink rump squarely on his snout.

“MmmmmMMMF!” He’s surprised at first, but he gets over it pretty quickly. She grinds her wet crotch against his mouth, playing her hot pink tail through his mane.

“Yeah! Mmm! Eat that pie!” Pinkie yells.

He laughs, muffled by her hot mound.

How can she say such strange things and still be so fine?

He brings one hoof up and kneads at her rump with it, leaving the other resting on Rainbow Dash’s hip as she rides him.

“Unh! Yeah!” Pinkie rocks her hips on his face, rubbing her arousal all over his nose and mouth. He thrusts his tongue up, right inside her.

“Oooh!” She almost squeals. “Yes! Put that tongue right up in me! Woohoo!”

He can’t help but chuckle, even while he’s tonguing her.

“Woo! Rock me, Big Mac! Party with my Pinkie h – mmf!”

Her ridiculous words are replaced by moaning and loud kissing. His eyes go wide as he realizes that the two mares are making out right on top of him. He would kill to see the three of them from some outside perspective right now – as it is, all he can see is Pinkie’s glorious round pink ass right in his face, punctuated occasionally by the hot pink of her tail.

He wiggles his tongue around inside her, feeling her pinch back and hearing her high-pitched moan.

And then his eyes go wider, still seeing nothing but pink. His hips jerk as they’re slammed into the floor. Rainbow Dash bucks her hips down into him, hard. She’s stronger than she looks, clearly. And then she sits up, climbing to the tip of his cock.

She braces on her back legs and slams her hips up and down, grunting with each stroke. She gets going at a ridiculous pace, far faster and more intense than a mare usually gets when riding on top. She must be balancing herself by holding onto Pinkie Pie. He keeps still, not sure how to move without upsetting her rhythm, letting her ride herself raw on him.

It’s incredible. He’s split between his hips and his mouth, lost in too much amazing female pleasure. It’s more than he ever could have hoped for, everything every male could dream of.

He floats for minutes, maybe, he can’t tell. Rainbow Dash humps up and down on his lap, Pinkie wiggles her hips against his mouth. He laps clumsily with his tongue, feeling the tight skin of her pert little anus against his nose.

The barn is gone, the floor beneath him is nothing, everything is hot, wet, firm young mare, pleasuring themselves on him. Using him, in the best way possible. He’s their playground, and he couldn’t be happier.

“Guh! Ah! AH!” Rainbow Dash starts yelling above him – Pinkie must be stroking her wings. Her inner walls are clamped around him, going even crazier than before.

He grunts into Pinkie and feels his cock twitch, again. Usually by the third time he’s gotten a little numb, just used up enough to ride for a while and still feel good. This is too much – he’s getting close again, coiling tension winding up in his balls, yearning to spill out.

“There you go – that’s my Dashie,” He hears Pinkie whisper soothingly. “Ride that stallion!”

“AH! FUCK! AH!” Rainbow Dash yells. Her hips are squeezing against him quickly, grasping tightly over and over, a trembling earthquake of an orgasm. He grunts loudly, dragging his snout to the side and biting a lovely hunk of Pinkie’s rump.

“Oooh, are you gonna come again, Big Mac?” Pinkie says. “C’mon Dash, get up!”

Her rump lifts away – everything’s bright and cool and clear again. He hadn’t realized how little air he was getting. Rainbow Dash is trembling on top of him, barely fucking him at all anymore – she looks exhausted, her face strained in climax.

“Huh?” she mutters weakly. She’s drenched in sweat. Her wings are quivering.

“Come on, lie down!” Pinkie pulls her off of him. He slides out of her, smacking wet against his own belly again. Rainbow Dash collapses on the floor next to Pinkie, and the pink earth pony pulls him to his hooves.

He stands over them, looking down at two gorgeous young mares on their backs beneath him, worked up into a lather. His cock aches to finish, roaring at him to get back to work. Pinkie is grinning, beckoning with her eyes. Rainbow Dash is looking far away, sucking in deep breaths, still coming down.

“Aright! Now do us both and come all over us!” Pinkie says.

“Huh?” Big Mac says, astonished at how amazing his life is.

“What?” Rainbow Dash snaps awake, cocking an eyebrow at Pinkie.

“All over us! Just – everywhere!” Pinkie rubs her hooves all over her own chest, writhing under him.

“Yeah – pass.” Rainbow Dash scoots to the side, leaving Mac and Pinkie to their own devices. “You go ahead though. I wanna see this.”

“Aww! Come on, Mac, do me!”

She doesn’t have to ask twice. He attacks, pouncing on top of her and slamming his cock into her with one rough stroke.

“WOW! Wheeeeee!”

She squeals and giggles as he pounds her furiously, grunting and snorting. He’s completely gone, just desperate to take her, to release the tension screaming in his whole lower body. He slams his throbbing self into her, feeling her wrap her hind legs around his hips as she laughs and squeaks and moans with every thrust.

She’s smiling at him, licking and nipping at his snout.

He neighs and kisses her right where her neck meets her shoulder, just a little hard, running his tongue all over her coat.

“Mmmmm!” She giggles into his ear.

He snorts and ruts her frantically, feeling aches in his thighs and hips.

She bites him gently, tugging at his thick neck with her teeth.

His chest heaves – he can’t last much longer.

“Do it, Big Mac!” she practically screams. “Cover me with your stallion custard!”

That does it. He’ll laugh about it later, even worry a little as to why that pushed him over the top. He pulls out in the nick of time and roars some gasping nonsense.

“AH – GA – AH!” he yells.

“Whoa!” Rainbow Dash’s eyes go wide.

“Wheeeeeee – Oh!” Pinkie Pie squeals and freezes as the first hot spurt hits her, streaking up and landing as far as her cute little nose. It paints a white sticky line all the way down her chest and belly.

“Ga! Ha…haaaaa…”

Mac feels his eyes squeeze close but forces them open, desperate to take in the scene underneath him. Pinkie lies perfectly still as his cock spasms and shakes, drawing lines all down her pink body.

It’s beautiful. Just beautiful. He shivers as the last of his seed shoots out in one lazy spurt, pooling just above her mound. She’s almost covered in it.

“Good job, Mac!” Pinkie smiles up at him, lowering her eyelids in a smoking gaze. “I’m all iced up. Like a Pinkie donut!”

He coughs out a weak chuckle and shakes his head, feeling a dopey smile spread across his face. He leans back and sits on his rump. She’s splayed out before him, still holding her legs spread, just lying there splashed with his semen.

“Man. Gross.” Rainbow Dash shakes her head. “You really like that, Pinkie?”

“Heehee!” Pinkie writhes around while nodding. She rubs her hooves on her chest, smearing the white goo all over herself.

“Shucks.” Mac takes a few last deep breaths, finally catching up. He nods at Dash. “Y’know, I don’t think I’ve ever met a mare quite like yer friend here.”

Rainbow Dash grins and scoots closer to Pinkie, experimentally eyeing her up.

“Yeah, she’s really somethi – Ack!”

Rainbow Dash jumps back, but too late. She scrunches up her snout and wipes at it, trying to clean off where Pinkie rubbed her.

“Haha, gotcha! Cumface! Haha!”

Mac’s face goes blank just in time for Pinkie to dart up and rub a sticky hoof into his snout. He flies backwards, spitting and choking.

“What the -! Guh – bleh!” He frantically wipes at his snout, smelling his own rapidly-cooling cum.

“Ha! Gotcha both! Right on the nose!” Pinkie grins in triumph.

“Ewwwww!” Rainbow Dash gags, forlornly rubbing her snout into one of her forelegs.

“Yeah, ditto.” Mac frowns and gets up, rummaging around through some old boxes nearby.

Know there’s gotta be one o’them old blankets…

There is. He offers the first one he finds to Rainbow Dash. She tears it away from him and scowls while she rubs her face with it. He quickly cleans himself with another and then holds it up, nodding at Pinkie.

“Okie dokie!” She gets up cheerfully and bounces over to him, leaning her body against his side.

“You want me to…?”

“Please?” she makes her eyes huge, shining up at him.

A smirk escapes out onto his lips as he cleans her. It’s awkward, physically, difficult to reach under her from the side.

“Here – like this.” She grins at him and slides underneath his body, rubbing her back against his chest and stomach. It’s easy now. He rests his weight on her while rubbing the blanket up and down her underside with both hooves. His snout is right in her mane again, soft, thick curls invading his nostrils. Her tail slaps up at his rump.

“Look, Rainbow! He mounted me again!” Pinkie bucks her hips up into him. “He’s such a naughty Big Mac!”

He chuckles quietly. He’s getting hard, despite the cumface shenanigans.

“Again?” Rainbow Dash wipes at her nose one last time and tosses the blanket aside. “Man, earth ponies. Crazy!”

“Hee hee, yeah.” Pinkie turns her head and gives him a playful kiss on the chin.

“You guys trying to leave me out this time?” Rainbow Dash trots over, bouncing her eyebrows at him. She pats his side with a hoof, running her eyes up and down his body. Then she reaches down and runs a hoof along his hardening cock, hanging lazily out of its sheath.

It reacts instantly, jerking up to full attention.

“My apologies, Miss.” Mac drops the blanket and reaches over with a thick foreleg, drawing Rainbow Dash into a quick kiss.

He breaks away and smiles down at her.

“Wouldn’t be proper not to share.”

She grins and dives under him for a closer look.

He slides the barn door closed with a pleasing thunk of wood meeting wood. He sighs, feeling incredible aches in his muscles.

The air is cool outside, the sky just turning pink. The sun is still peeking out over a distant hill, waving one last time before retiring for the night.

“That. Was. Awesome.” Rainbow Dash says, casually flicking water out of her wings.

“I know!” Pinkie bounces up next to her and proceeds to shake like a dog, spraying water everywhere.

“Aw, Pinkie! I just dried off.”

“Sorry!”

Pinkie throws herself onto Rainbow Dash, rubbing her coat against her to soak up any errant splashes.

Mac chuckles and shakes his head, still wondering if he’s going to wake up at some point. On top of everything else, he’d gotten to watch them rinse off by the barrels outside, laughing and splashing each other. He’d barely washed himself – even after having both of them in a variety of ways, it was hard not to watch.

He turns to them and is surprised to see Rainbow Dash tapping the dirt with a hoof, hedging her words. Pinkie is hanging on her side, looking as carefree as usual.

“So, uh – thanks? I guess?” Rainbow Dash says.

“Thank you. Was a hell of a time. I’m mighty glad y’all stopped by.” Mac says.

“Yeah, me too. Not bad, for a stallion.” Dash winks at him.

“Heh.” He almost blushes, but then remembers a bit of the real world. “Uh, by the by…probably shouldn’t breath a word of this to my –”

“Yeah, no. Totally.” Dash interrupts him. “Same page, completely. Don’t worry about us.”

“Yeah! Super secret super sexy times,” Pinkie says with frightening intensity.

“Well alright then.” He smiles wide at them, unable to contain it. “And, uh…if you two ever feel like it again, you know…”

“Oooh!” Pinkie lights up, nudging Rainbow Dash in the side. “Can we? Huh?”

“Maybe.” Dash shoots him a smug smile. Her eyes say all kinds of yes. “We know where to find you.”

“Sounds good.” He glances towards the farmhouse. “Y’all are welcome to come in for a drink or something.”

“Next time. We’re gonna get going.”

“You sure?” he says.

“Mmmhmm.” Dash nods at him, then at Pinkie Pie. They turn to walk away, smiling at him over their shoulders.

“See you around.”

“Byeeeeee!”

Mac waves slowly, staring as they trot off towards the bush from whence they came. His eyes linger on them long after they’ve turned away, chatting to each other as they trot off out of earshot. A fine pair of fillies, no doubt. Proper young mares.

He lets out a sigh and walks back towards the farmhouse. The grass beneath his hooves is soft as clouds, the world moves around for him, all is blissful peace. Even the aching of his muscles and the soreness between his legs is amazing.

He lets himself in quietly but stops as he walks past the kitchen – his stomach growls, louder than his hoof steps. He prepares a simple feast of celebration, just some apples and a few pieces of sweet honey bread, finished off with a bottle of his favorite suds.

He’s about to sit down when something catches his eye – one last piece of chocolate cake on the counter. He grabs that, too.

He lays out the spread and settles into a leisurely meal, smiling as he chews. He can’t stop smiling. Real smiling, an easy, warm grin.

Winona’s barking floats in from outside – happy greetings. The front door opens and closes. Hooves clop their way into the house and towards the kitchen.

“Howdy there.” His sister nods at him as she walks in, barely glancing over. “Thought you was goin’ out?”

“Haven’t left yet.” He calmly keeps eating.

“Huh.” Applejack rummages around in their cupboards and grabs an apple of her own, leaning against a counter. “Well, lookit you. What’s goin’ on?”

“Huh?” He looks up at her with a mouth full of bread, only showing a bit of the panic in his chest.

“Grinnin’ like some kind of idiot. Shoot, I ain’t seen you this happy since…hell, I dunno.” Applejack takes a bite of her snack. She looks deeply pleased.

He swallows hard, forcing his lips to turn down into his usual almost-smile.

“Well it ain’t bad,” Applejack talks while chewing, “Heck, it’s good to see you lookin’ happy fer once.”

“Uh…heh. Just a happy kind of day, I guess.” He takes a swig of his beer, hiding behind the bottle. Then he dives his snout into his bread, hiding behind that. Something about this seems to amuse his sister.

“You’re back soon, “ he says between bites.

“Yeah,” she swallows and wipes at her mouth with a foreleg. “I was lookin’ for Pinkie and Rainbow Dash, but I couldn’t find ‘em anywhere.”

He freezes, crumbs falling from his lips.

“Probably off somewhere doin’ it.” She rolls her eyes, not paying attention to him at all. “Those two are always doin’ it.”

“Uh…yeah? Is that right?” he says, feeling cold sweat on his neck.

“Thought you knew about those two.”

“I do now.”

Applejack snorts a laugh and then loudly finishes off her apple.

“You mind if I tag along to the bar? Might be nice to take it easy for a bit,” she says.

“Sure! Sure. Sounds good. Uh…” He darts his eyes around, trying to get control over his tone. “Thought I might wait for Applebloom to get back first.”

“Good call.” Applejack nods, then looks startled. “Is Granny up?”

“Didn’t check yet.”

“Aw, Mac!” She rolls her eyes at him this time. “Be right back, I’ll do it.”

He holds still, watching her as she leaves the kitchen. His face stays blank as she turns away, continues to be blank as she walks out, and holds for a few seconds more. He holds his breath.

He can’t hold it long. A huge grin blasts back onto his face. He can’t help it.

It’s just that kind of day.

The kitchen door closes behind Applejack. She can still taste the apple on her lips – there’s nothing like the taste of her own crop, the product of her own sweat and toil. Every bite is a thing of pride.

It’s crowded out by other thoughts. Wondering how Granny’s holding up, wondering if Applebloom’s okay, of course she’s okay stop being such a worrywart, yeah but that last report card wasn’t exactly up to snuff, gonna have to talk to her and then Cheerilee at some point about it, oh come on she’ll be fine and besides you can’t talk to her teacher anytime soon you gotta be bringin’ in that new field for the next few days at least and then after that the pigs need a new –

She freezes mid-step.

Rainbow Dash. Pinkie Pie. Delicious chocolate cake.

Her eyes shoot back to the kitchen door. He looked happy. Smiling like a filly that just got her cutie mark.

Her eyes narrow. Her lips purse, pondering, a light bulb flickering above her head.

Then her face relaxes. She smiles and chuckles softly, shaking her head.

“Naw…”

She trots off to check on her Granny, looking forward to a beer with her big bro and just unwinding for a night.

Ponyville's Finest

Rainbow Dash slurps loudly from a straw. She has plenty of milkshake left – it’s definitely awesome. But her head is elsewhere.

She pushes her sunglasses up onto her forehead, darting her eyes all over the ponies passing by. She’s sitting outside under an umbrella, at one of those little restaurants right on town square. It’s a beautiful day. Thanks to her, of course.

Pinkie Pie is sitting across from her, loudly blowing bubbles in her milkshake. It’s spattering all over the table. Pinkie giggles harder as the mess she’s making gets bigger.

Dash’s shades fall over her eyes. She pushes them back up. How else are ponies supposed to see that she’s checking them out?

She keeps scoping out the action. A tight pair of flanks there, a hot mane over there, muscles or curves or just a pleasing mix of colors. Her tail flicks in little circles impatiently. She barely tastes her milkshake.

“Man,” she says, “I could really go for some ruttin’.”

Pinkie freezes, stopping her bubbles. She waggles her eyebrows at Dash.

“Oh yeah?” she says.

“Heh.” Rainbow Dash pats her on the shoulder. “No offense, Pinks, but we’ve been doing it like, a lot. You’re great and everything, but I kinda wanna mix it up.”

“Oh. Okay!” Pinkie goes back to blowing bubbles for a second, completely unbothered. “Who you gonna do?”

That is the question, of course. Rainbow Dash scrunches her nose up.

“I dunno. I kinda wanted to try out a stallion this time.”

Pinkie perks up a little.

“Try?” she says.

Dash jolts, blowing a few unintentional bubbles through her straw.

“Uh, I meant, like -”

Pinkie gasps endlessly, her mane poofing out bigger somehow.

“Dashie!” she yells. “You mean to tell me you haven’t -!”

Rainbow Dash crams a hoof in Pinkie’s mouth.

“Not so loud!” she looks around quickly. Nopony is paying attention to them in the slightest. Pinkie spits out her hoof, crouching low over the table.

“You mean to tell me,” she whispers, “That you haven’t had a real willie inside you?”

“Uh,” Dash makes a confused face, not sure how to deal with that phrasing.

“Oh oh oh! Dashie, it’s like, the BEST! We gotta find you some stallion meat!”

“Huh. Right on.” Rainbow Dash nods, surprised and glad at how cool Pinkie has turned out to be. She turns back to the ponies of Ponyville, innocently going about their daily business. Pinkie snatches the pegasus mare’s sunglasses and puts them on.

“So - do you want like, a macho man or a nice guy or a zebra or what?” Pinkie holds the shades over her eyes, looking around in the most obviously suspicious manner possible.

“Zebra?” Dash shakes her head clear of Pinkie’s confusion. “Eh. Whatever.”

“Whatever?” Pinkie balks. “Whatever? You don’t care? You just want random dickings?”

“Not totally random. Do you see any guys that you know?” Dash asks.

“Know?” She can tell Pinkie is blinking quickly behind the shades. “Of course I see ponies I know, I know every -”

Rainbow Dash cocks an eyebrow.

“Oh. OH. Ohhhhhhhhhh!” Pinkie lowers the shades and stares at Dash over them, bobbing her eyebrows very sexily. “You mean like - KNOW.”

“Yeah. I thought maybe you could hook me up.”

“Hmm.” Pinkie puts a hoof to her chin, scanning the bustling square. “I knew him once!”

She points to a chocolate brown unicorn ambling along past them.

“Yeah?” Dash checks him out with more than a little interest.

“Yeah…” Pinkie makes a disappointed face. “He’s not that good at knowing, honestly.”

“Oh.” Dash slumps down a little. “Well, forget that. I’m lookin’ for the best.”

“Oooh! Up there!” Pinkie points up at a pegasus gliding by. “I knew him like CRAZY this one time!”

“Ehhh.” Something about him is immediately off putting in Dash’s eyes. She doesn’t even consider it.

“Hmm.” Pinkie slurps more milkshake, pondering very seriously.

“Mmm.” Dash watches the crowd. Nothing else really jumps out at her. Not at the moment, anyway.

“I can’t really think of any good stallions I wanna know right now. None of ‘em measure up to the Dash, I guess.” Pinkie elbows Dash, winking obviously.

“Heh, yeah.” Rainbow Dash shrugs, cool as can be.

“There’s gotta be somepony who can know you like I know you,” Pinkie says nonchalantly.

“Uh – heh. Yeah.” Rainbow Dash coughs a little, not quite as cool as can be. “I mean, you and me are obviously the best mares around.”

“Ha! Maybe you are!” Pinkie rolls her eyes.

“How am I gonna figure out who’s the best stallion?”

Pinkie shrugs. They ponder silently for a moment.

And then Ponyville’s own scarlet Adonis walks into the square, pulling an apple cart. They both lock onto him immediately. Pinkie furiously blows bubbles in her milkshake. Dash feels her wings flutter and tingle a little.

He pulls his cart to the usual spot, just moseying along through a usual day. Even performing this mundane action, his thick muscles ripple most awesomely. His face betrays not a bit of interest in anything around him – just a laconic almost-smile, a laid-back rock in stormy waters.

“Ooooooooh!” Pinkie’s eyes get huge.

“Yeah. No kidding,” Dash says, not looking away.

“I think I figured out who you should know,” Pinkie whispers.

“Have you, uh…known him?” Dash asks.

“No way! I mean, he’s Applejack’s brother.”

“So?” Dash glares.

“I dunno. Isn’t that weird?” Pinkie asks.

“Maybe. What if she’s cool with it?”

“Oooh! That would be neat. I would know him so hard I would die! I mean, look at him!”

They both pass a pleasant second doing just that. Rainbow Dash traces her eyes over him as he unloads his cart. He’s well-muscled, but not too defined. Not like the athletes she’s usually drooling over – just a big, solid, handsome dude. She makes up her mind right then and there.

“Have you ever asked Applejack about it?” Rainbow Dash wonders.

“No.” Pinkie slurps more milkshake loudly.

“Huh.” Rainbow Dash ponders and schemes, her tail practically spinning like a rotor.

“Are you gonna ask her?” Pinkie says.

“Yeah. You know what? I am.”

Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie sidle up to Applejack’s market stand. Big Mac has just left, pulling an empty cart towards the long, dusty road home.

“Hey, y’all! What’s goin’ on?” Applejack greets them happily.

Dash and Pinkie give each other a look, and then turn their heads towards Mac. They can still see him leaving the square. They pause far longer than either of them meant to, just staring.

“Can I…help you with somethin’?” Applejack says. Pinkie lets her eyes linger. Dash snaps to attention.

“What’s up with your brother?” she asks instantly.

“Huh?” Applejack jolts a little. “Whaddya mean?”

“Does he have a girlfriend or something?” Rainbow Dash smiles.

“No,” Applejack smiles right back. “No, he does not. Why, you takin’ a shine to him?”

“I guess you could say that.” Rainbow Dash grins back.

“Yeah?” Applejack cocks an eyebrow. “I thought you were askin’ for Pinkie. Since when are you into dudes?”

“I’m into your brother.” Dash smiles harder.

“Huh. Don’t that beat all.” Applejack pushes her hat a little further back on her mane. “Heck, for one of you? Wouldn’t mind puttin’ a good word in. You just make sure you take him out someplace nice, you hear?”

“Neat! Like a date?” Pinkie’s eyes light up.

“Sure! Shoot, I been meanin’ to see that big lug set up with some nice filly. Never thought it would be one of my friends, but hey – if that’s what yer lookin’ for, sister.” Applejack chuckles and winks, nudging Rainbow Dash with a hoof. “Heh, sister.”

“…Sister?” Rainbow treads carefully on the word.

“Calm down, I’m just joshin’ you. Halfways, anyway.” Applejack elbows Rainbow Dash, bouncing her eyebrows. Then she suddenly gets very serious. “But he’s my bro, remember. Pure gentlecolt. I hear one word about you even thinking of breakin’ his heart and there’ll be a reckoning.”

Rainbow Dash and Pinkie exchange a cautious glance. Applejack seems to ignore it, bouncing right back to earthy charm.

“Aw heck, what am I saying? Course you’ll treat him right. Right?” she says.

“Uh, yeah. Sure. I mean,” Rainbow Dash puts a hoof to her chin. “Thanks and everything. But I don’t know about all this date stuff.”

“Huh?” Applejack’s smile drops away.

“I kinda wanna just do him,” she says.

“Di – wha - !” Applejack sputters, stomping her hooves a little. “You wanna WHAT?”

“Do him. Y’know, do him. Like, sex him up all -”

“I know what you mean.” Applejack cuts her off.

“Can I do him, too?” Pinkie asks sheepishly. “He’s hunky.”

Applejack’s jaw drops silently.

“Yeah, let Pinkie do him, too. It’ll be fun,” Dash says.

“Oooh, let’s do him together!” Pinkie bounces on her hooves.

“Whoa! That sounds kind of awesome, actually.” Dash puts a hoof to her chin, considering all kinds of new possibilities.

“WHAT?” Applejack blinks over and over, still hanging her jaw open.

“Yeah, we can both just go to town on him at the same time! It’ll be like in the movies!” Pinkie bounces with excitement.

“Oh man, I call first dibs on his -” Dash starts to say.

“AaaaaaaAAAAAHHH!” Applejack clamps her hooves over her own ears. “AAAAHHH! NO! Not listening! Related, right here! Cut that out now!”

“Jeez.” Rainbow Dash rolls her eyes. “I’m not saying YOU should do him.”

“Yeah!” Pinkie Pie giggles. “Like, eww! Extra-retard foals!”

Applejack cringes and makes disgusted noises, backing away from them.

“What in the HAY is wrong with you two?” she says.

“Nothing. Can we have sex with your brother?” Dash says.

“NO!” Applejack yells.

“What? You were just saying…” Rainbow Dash starts.

“Yeah, why not?” Pinkie Pie adds.

“BECAUSE!” Applejack yells like it’s the most obvious thing that could be.

“I don’t get it.” Pinkie says.

“He - he’s my brother! If y’all are just lookin’ for a stallion to buck with, you can look somewhere else.” Applejack cocks a wary eye at them.

“But AJ, come oooooonnnnn…” Dash drones on.

“No.”

“Please?” Pinkie asks.

“No.”

“What if we just -?”

“NO.”

Dash and Pinkie stare at her, looking more and more put out.

“Man,” Dash scrunches up her snout. “Come ON. What’s the big deal?”

“Mmmm!” Pinkie nods furiously.

“What’s the – what – he –!” Applejack loses trust in words momentarily and just growls at them. “He’s my kin. THAT’S the big deal. I ain’t too partial to some mare just usin’ him like a cut o’ meat. Even if y’all are my friends. That ain’t dignified like.”

“But what if he wants to be like meat? It’ll be fun!” Pinkie says.

“Yeah! What are you, his owner?” Rainbow says.

Applejack looks taken aback, and then just heaves a weary sigh. “I mean - I guess it is his business and all, honestly. But it just don’t sit right with me. It would mean a whole darn lot to me if you two just kept yer hooves to yourselves.”

Dash and Pinkie seem to take this in, looking for all the world like they’re seriously absorbing her words. Applejack smiles in triumph.

“…Please? Just once?” Rainbow Dash says.

“Gah! No, no, a thousand times, no!” Applejack growls. “Now go on, git! I got a business to run.”

“Awww…” Dash and Pinkie bow their heads and shuffle off like guilty school fillies.

Rainbow Dash waits until they’re out of AJ’s earshot to complain loudly.

“What the hell? We just wanna have a little fun,” she says.

“Poor Big Mac! I bet he’s lonely.” Pinkie looks genuinely concerned.

“Yeah, man. A stallion’s got needs, right? I can’t believe AJ would cock block her own brother like that.”

“I bet he just cries himself to sleep while whacking off every night!” Pinkie looks pretty excited by the idea.

“Uh, I hope not.” Rainbow Dash looks at her like she’s crazy.

“Hmmm.” Pinkie ignores the look. “So what are we gonna do now?”

“I dunno. I really, really wanna do him.” Rainbow Dash glares with intense horniness.

“Forbidden fruit is the sweetest knowing of all!” Pinkie says theatrically. “Do you think we should just go right to him?”

“What, behind AJ’s back?” Rainbow Dash thinks about this for a second. “Naw. Definite dick move. Let’s try working on her some more.”

“Wait - you think if we bother Applejack enough, maybe she’ll just let us know him eventually so we’ll leave her alone?” Pinkie, again, looks quite concerned.

“Something like that,” Dash says.

Pinkie’s face lights up.

“Okay!”

They bump hooves. The plan is hatched.

Applejack slumps against a fence with a satisfied sigh. She’s earned this break a few times over. She lets her hooves cool for a second, thinking nothing in particular.

It’s nice and hot out. Or it was, anyway. She looks around real quick, wondering how it got so shady all of a sudden. She looks up.

“Oh! Well hey there, Dash.”

Rainbow Dash grins down at her from a small, custom-cut cloud.

“What’s up?” Applejack asks.

“Nothing. Just thought you looked hot down there. Y’know, more than usual,” Rainbow Dash says.

Applejack cocks an eyebrow, making a suspicious smirk.

“So I brought you some shade,” Rainbow Dash says.

“That’s mighty kind of ya. Thanks.”

They stare at each other. Insects buzz in the heat all around them.

“So what are you up to -” Applejack starts to say.

“Can I have sex with Big Mac now?” Rainbow Dash cuts her off.

“What? No!”

“Awwwwwww come on!”

“I said no, dang it!” Applejack says, getting all ornery. “How would you like it if I was always buggin’ you to rut with one of your kin?”

“Huh?” Rainbow Dash looks like she’s really thinking this over. “I don’t have any brothers or sisters. But if I did, I would totally let you do one of them.”

“Wha?” This gives Applejack quite some pause. “Really?”

“Sure. No problem.”

“Huh.” AJ chews this over. “Thanks. I guess?”

“Anytime.”

Again, the buzzing of cicadas fills in their pause.

“So…” Rainbow Dash gets a sly smile.

“Still no. Sorry.”

“Dang! Cold. Stone cold.” Rainbow Dash rolls her eyes. She flies off, just a little bit huffily, leaving Applejack under the tiny cloud.

“That’ll be six bits, ma’am.”

The earth pony hands over some large coins. Applejack turns to her cart to make change and bag the goods.

“SURPRISE!” Pinkie pops out of the apples in the stand, spraying produce everywhere.

“Gah!” Applejack’s hat almost falls off. “What’re you doin’?”

“Can I have sex with Big Mac? Please please please please pretty please?”

Applejack groans loudly.

“No!”

“Okay, okay, I get it. You’re a business mare, I get it,” Pinkie Pie says very solemnly. “How much?”

“EXCUSE me?”

“How much?”

“NO! Even MORE no!”

“I’ve got the bits! I’m good for it!” Pinkie yells, waving her hooves around.

“Consarnit it, Pinkie! Get outta here!”

“Free donuts? No, free cakes! No, lifetime supply of free parties!”

“PINKIE.”

Pinkie sighs angrily.

“Fine…”

She disappears back into the apples. Applejack pokes her hoof around in the pile, but finds no Pinkie Pie. She’s just starting to get puzzled when somepony clears their throat.

She turns around to see the family of ponies still waiting for their change.

“Oh! Uh, heh - beggin’ yer pardon.”

Applejack swings and jumps, gracefully landing another perfect rope trick.

The crowd goes wild. She swings the lasso around and jumps through her own loop again, driving the spectating ponies even more nuts. She grins around the rope in her teeth – this is foal’s play, nothin’ to it. She’s going home with a trophy for sure.

She even lets herself scan the crowd a little as she throws out another trick, coasting on autopilot.

Twilight Sparkle is sitting near the front, clapping her hooves together and cheering.

Fluttershy is right next to her – Applejack can’t hear the little pegasus, of course, but it looks like she’s quietly screaming, “Yay!”

Rarity is next in line, clopping her hooves on the bleachers and yelling, “Bravo!” over and over.

Applejack sticks yet another perfect landing. Those other ponies don’t have an apple’s chance in an oven.

Rainbow Dash is next to Rarity, waving a sign that says, “GO” in big, bold letters. Pinkie Pie is next to her with a sign that says, “AJ!” They’re waving their signs together, whooping like crazy.

They bend down for a second, picking up new signs.

Dash’s says, “CAN WE HAVE”

Pinkie’s says, “SEX WITH YOUR”

They bend down again. Applejack never sees the next pair of signs.

“Whoa!” She snags a hoof on the loop of her own lasso and goes crashing into the dirt, face first. The crowd deflates with a disappointed, “Aww…”

Applejack growls from deep in her throat, glaring up at her friends.

“Hey! Hey Applejack! Hey! Hey! Hey!”

“AJ! Buddy. Pal. Over here.”

Applejack trudges on, her head low to the ground, ignoring them completely.

“I made you this cake! It’s chocolate! It! Is! Delicious!” Pinkie Pie bounces along, jostling the cake balanced on top of her butt.

“You know what? This is so crazy, you’re never gonna believe this. I found these tickets to a convention for apples and apple accessories…” Rainbow Dash carries on.

“ENOUGH!” Applejack stands up, waving her hooves around. “Cut it out! Both of you! PLEASE!”

Both her friends pause, looking innocent in the guiltiest way possible.

“I don’t want you messin’ around with my brother!” AJ yells.

“Whaaaaaaaaat?” Pinkie Pie laughs. “Who said anything about your brother?”

“Yeah, we’re just being nice.” Dash says.

Applejack gives them the longest, most fed-up stare ever seen by pony eyes.

“Okay, no, you’re right,” Dash admits.

“Yeah, we wanna play with his thingy.” Pinkie nods.

“Eww.” Applejack holds up a hoof. “Eww and no.”

“Coooooooome ooooooooooonnnnnnnn!” Dash whines and bounces on her hooves like a little foal that badly has to pee.

“No.”

“What if we just have a little bit of sex?” Pinkie suggests like it’s a novel idea.

“No.”

“What about just a blowjob?” Dash offers.

AJ makes noises like she might vomit a little.

“No!” she yells.

“What if I just take a bunch of pictures of his weenie and rub ‘em all over myself like this?” Pinkie Pie rubs her hooves on her own chest, staring off into space and moaning. Applejack watches her in utter horror.

“What?” Rainbow Dash says, looking a little confused herself.

“Oh. My. Princess. What is wrong with you guys?” Applejack says.

“We just wanna do it with him. No strings or anything like that.” Rainbow Dash calmly explains.

“Yeah, just for funsies!” Pinkie Pie smiles and nods.

“Just for -? See, exactly! No way.” Applejack waves her hooves around.

“What? Pfft, jeez AJ, you thought we were gonna marry him or something?” Dash rolls her eyes.

“Oh my gosh, could we? That would be CRAZY.” Pinkie bounces on hoof edge.

“At least that would be honest like.” Applejack growls. “Better than you lot just ruttin’ him and runnin’.”

“But he’s a guy! I thought guys liked that?” Pinkie looks confused.

“Pinkie!” Applejack turns to her, almost desperate. “You got sisters, right? Don’t you get it?”

“Get what?” Pinkie cocks her head sideways, like a bird.

“Well, what if Mac wanted to just rut one of yer little sisters?”

“Oh, don’t be silly, Apple-” Pinkie freezes mid-word, her hoof hanging in the air. Then her face falls, turning strangely serious and thoughtful. “Hmm.”

“Yeah. See?” Applejack nods.

“No! No, don’t see!” Rainbow waves her hooves around, keeping Pinkie from slipping away. “It’s different. He’s a guy! I mean, come on.”

“Yeah!” Pinkie bounces back to her usual self, kind of. “Yeah?”

“Ugh…” Applejack face palms, shaking her head.

“Yeah, it’s fine. Just chill about this already, AJ.” Rainbow says.

“Chill?” AJ’s neck veins protest. “CHILL?”

“Yeah!” Pinkie Pie almost laughs. “Just take a-”

“GRAH! HEJU- HRK- ARGH!” Applejack growls nonsense, her anger limited by the confines of her pony body. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie tense up, glancing at each other.

Applejack does a kind of angry dance, gritting her teeth and stomping around in the dirt. She opens her mouth a few times, looking like she’s about to yell at them, but cuts herself off each time. Pinkie and Dash stay still, hoping maybe that her vision is based on movement.

Finally, Applejack closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, sinking on her hooves.

“Aright, aright,” she says, calming herself down. She glares at both her friends in turn. “Y’all really want to get at him that bad?”

Rainbow Dash can tell by Applejack’s grimace that her face just lit up. Pinkie’s too, by the depth of that frown.

“Just supposin’. I ain’t givin’ the all clear yet,” Applejack waves them down. “But just supposin’. Y’all can promise me you’ll ask him out regular like, for dinner or something? Proper and honest like?”

“Honest?” Rainbow Dash scoffs. “What’s so honest about taking him out if I just wanna do him?”

“Ugh, Dash!” Applejack rolls her eyes viciously. “You ain’t makin’ this easy.”

“What? I’m just saying.” Rainbow Dash gives her a funny look. “Has he never had a girlfriend before or something?”

“No, he’s done some datin’.”

“Did you stand guard by the bed while they were doing it?” Dash cracks a cheeky smile.

“Maybe ah should, with mares like you runnin’ around.” Applejack snorts and glares.

“Maybe you should lighten up a little.” Rainbow Dash glares back.

“Maybe you should stop thinkin’ with your flanks all the time!” Applejack steps forward.

“Maybe you should dust the cobwebs out of yours!” Rainbow Dash steps forward too, getting right in Applejack’s face.

“Say it again!” Applejack growls, leaning in even closer. “Ah dare you! I will buck you so hard you won’t even remember it!”

“Is that a promise?” Rainbow Dash licks her lips and waggles her eyebrows.

Applejack growls again. Their snouts are almost touching, so close that the glint of anger in Applejack’s eyes is blurred a little. Rainbow Dash waits on hoof edge for Applejack’s counter, dizzy with frustrated sexual thrills. She can’t remember a time that seeing Applejack get angry didn’t turn her on.

Applejack is about to yell something back – Rainbow Dash can tell, she always squints a little and scrunches her nose just like that. Dash almost bites her lip, hardly able to wait.

But then she hears Pinkie Pie’s voice instead.

“Girls?”

“Huh?” they both turn to the pink mare, suddenly remembering the rest of the world around them.

“What does Big Mac think about it?” Pinkie asks.

They both stare at her for a second, blinking.

“Hey, yeah!” Rainbow Dash hops a little. “What did he say?”

“He didn’t say anything.” Applejack sticks her snout up in the air.

“What?” Rainbow Dash flares her wings. “You didn’t even ask him?”

“Whaddya want me to do, Dash? Just go to my own brother and be like…I dunno, here’s my friends, take your pick? I ain’t about to do that.”

“But I wanna be picked!” Rainbow Dash puts on a forlorn face. “And what if he wants to pick me? You could be standing in the way of one of Equestria’s great romances!”

Applejack rolls her eyes.

“Gimme a break. You hardly even know him. And you wouldn’t know romance if it gave you flowers.”

Pinkie Pie jumps between them, heading off any possible conflagrations.

“You’re right, Applejack,” she nods very seriously. “We hardly know him. Can we just talk with him and see what happens?”

The orange earth pony eyes them warily.

“Just talk?” she raises an eyebrow.

“Sure!” Pinkie nods.

“Yeah!” Rainbow Dash nods.

Applejack looks unimpressed.

“Talk. With the eventual goal of ruttin’,” she says.

“Jeez, give the guy a break already. Getting laid isn’t gonna kill him.” Rainbow Dash says.

“It ain’t that,” Applejack says, finally sounding less angry. “I know he’s gotten some sugar here and there. That’s fine, that’s natural and all.”

“So what’s the big deal?” Dash says from behind Pinkie.

“Y’all are my friends, y’know? And he’s my family, and…” Applejack trails off, looking back and forth at nothing. Pinkie and Dash give her a moment to work it out, and she does. “I just don’t wanna see things get messy. For either side.”

They all stare at each other for a long second. Pinkie Pie silently places the cake on the ground, and then pounces onto Applejack with a hug.

“Hey! What are you -?” Applejack says.

“D’awww, Applejack!” Pinkie grins ear-to-ear. “You’re only mad because you care! We love you, too!”

“Heh…well, shucks.” Applejack carefully hugs her back. “It’s more selfish than you think. Last thing I want is to be in the middle of some sorta lover’s quarrel.”

Pinkie lets her go, and they both turn to look at Rainbow Dash.

“Okay, yeah, I’m touched,” she makes a show of being unaffected. “So can I do him already?”

“See, there?” Applejack says to Pinkie. “Y’all could go about this with a little more class.”

“Oh, you know Dash!” Pinkie Pie shrugs. “She’s just overcompensating for the inherent awkwardness of the situation by being all blustery and blunt. She can’t help it!”

“What?” Rainbow Dash says, not sure if she’s just been insulted or not.

“And she’s a little nervous because she’s never been with a guy before. Shh, don’t tell anyone!” Pinkie whispers loudly.

“Am not!” Rainbow Dash’s wings droop.

Applejack chuckles, wearily finishing it off with a sigh and a shake of her head. She looks back and forth at them, but she’s almost smiling.

“So…what are you two gonna do, then? Don’t tell me you really were gonna double up on him. You gotta work somethin’ out,” she says.

Rainbow Dash opens her mouth to recite a very explicit list of the things she would like to do with Big Mac and Pinkie Pie. Pinkie dives in before Dash can begin.

“We’ll just talk to him. Nice, normal flirting. And he can pick, or we can each go on a date and then he can pick, or something. We’ll figure it out.”

Applejack seems almost satisfied. She looks to Dash and cocks an eyebrow. Rainbow Dash raises a solemn hoof.

“Yup. That. Exactly.” She nods towards Pinkie Pie.

Applejack looks back and forth again, then at the ground, then back and forth. She’s right on the edge, Dash can see it in her eyes – her wings ruffle a little in anticipation and she fights to hold back a huge, foalish grin.

But then Applejack’s eyes narrow. Looking right at Rainbow Dash.

“Tickets.” She holds out a hoof.

“Huh? Oh, yeah.” Rainbow Dash hands them over.

Applejack tucks them into her hat. She turns to Pinkie, still looking very stern.

“Cake.”

Pinkie obediently places the cake on Applejack’s back. She looks back and forth at them one last time, then nods, sealing the contract.

“Aright. You can talk to him.”

Again, Rainbow Dash’s face makes a dark reflection on Applejack.

“Ah said talk. And then whatever happens…you just behave yerselves, y’hear? And keep any messy details far away from my ears.”

Pinkie and Rainbow Dash salute in unison.

“No problem.” Dash says.

“Best behavior!” Pinkie says.

“Okay then.” Applejack falters a little as she turns to Rainbow Dash, not comfortable with these next words. “And, uh…sorry fer gettin’ all ornery, I guess. I didn’t mean to call you a hussy or anythin’ like that.”

“It’s cool,” she shrugs, “I don’t really think you have cobwebs in your, uh - you know.” Rainbow Dash teeters on leaving well enough alone. Then she gets a wicked smile and dives ahead anyway. “But you should really let me check sometime. Just to make sure.”

Applejack’s eyes go just a little wide before she smiles and shakes her head.

“I take it back. You are some kinda crazy hussy.” She thumps her hoof into Rainbow Dash’s chest, still shaking her head. “Don’t make me regret any of this, now.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll be good to him.” Rainbow Dash grins with all kinds of lascivious meaning.

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Applejack rolls her eyes.

“Not too good!” Pinkie dives between them again. “We’ll just talk and see what happens.”

Applejack nods again. They say quick goodbyes and then she trots off with her bribe, looking only a little perturbed. Rainbow Dash openly stares at her rump as she leaves them behind on the road.

Again, they wait until she’s good and far away before either says anything.

“Man,” Rainbow Dash says, “She needs to get laid.”

“Pffffft! Right?” Pinkie giggles.

“I can’t believe she finally went for it.”

“I know! We did it!” Pinkie bounces on her hooves.

“Well – we haven’t done it yet.” Rainbow Dash sits on her rump, pondering. “How do you wanna do this?”

“I don’t know,” Pinkie puts a hoof to her chin and stares off into the sky. “Maybe we really should just talk to him.”

“Yeah!” Rainbow Dash grins. “Talk…and see what happens.”

Pinkie leans away from her, looking almost shocked.

“What do you mean by that?” She raises one eyebrow, smiling a little.

“Come on. You really think if we lay it out for him, he’s not gonna want to do it? With both of us? I mean, look at us!”

Pinkie gasps loudly.

“You really wanna do him together?” she says.

“Uh…yeah. You don’t?” Rainbow Dash leans a little closer to Pinkie, hovering a wing over her shoulders.

“Oh no, I do! It sounds fun.” Pinkie leans into Dash’s wingy embrace. “But we told Applejack –”

“Talk. And then whatever happens. And she doesn’t want the details. Right?”

“Dashie!” Pinkie gasps and turns to her with sex in her eyes. “You’re so bad!”

“Hey, you were thinking the same thing.”

“Yeah!” Pinkie nods and grins. “So…now?”

“You wanna?”

“YES.” Pinkie nods like a maniac.

“Alright, then.” Dash poses, her wings flared. “To Sweet Apple Acres!”

“Cocks Ahoy!” Pinkie bounces and yells.

They share a sloppy victory kiss and take off down the road.