How Anon Died Twice and Not at All
Author's Note
Edtiing underway, suggestions welcome
How Anon Died Twice and Not at All
A man stood beside me and sang a little tune, an ancient melody passed from father down to son, as he waited for the evening to come to a close.
As his eyes began to shut, and the weariness began to claim his ming and sleep called from across the abyss.
And then he was a startled wake by the slamming of the door as the musician turned and left the veteran of countless battles to his slumber as his sleep had won the hard fought battle in the end.
He stood upon the empty street as dust devils swirled about him as the buildings crumbled. He stood once more in that ancient city where he’d fought long ago, his feet weary and his mind numb as he faced the setting sun.
In time as he watched and waited, a kaleidoscope bus of all the rainbow’s colours arose from the road and pulled beside the soldier. Turning to his left, he stepped up into the bus and onto the stage as a band began to play an ancient song passed down the generations.
Crying in his ecstatic joy, he fell to the ground. Through the floor he went, as colors swirled as rainbow strips about him as he hovered in the shadows of his mind and the darkness of his dream.
A knocking turned his head, his body following, curling up and laying down down in his bed as he awoke to see his love awaiting for him. A whisper of wind arose, sweeping through her as she turned to dust and vanished. As he wailed into that night, his heart stopped in two. Where he lay and he passed on as all he was vanished into the swirling sands of time. . .
A parade awaited him as he sat doubly once more the king of his nation and upon his throne, he smiled and he waved at the people passing by when something fell from the heavens, knocking him back and off his chair, his but hitting the ground hard.
The pegasus that had collided with him looked at him curiously before kneeling as her eyes widened.
“My King,” She stammered, “you have returned to us at last!”
Stretching out a hand, Anon von Doom ruffled her head fluff.
“That I have, my dear Olivia.” The earth toned pegasus smiled at his touch.
And there was her knife, held in hoof, thrusting forward into his chest as Olivia laughed and cried as tears streamed down her face, to her hoof, and onto the knife, slickening it as it plunged into Anon’s torso.
The blade twisted and turned inside of him as though he were a pumpkin being carved up by his lover who laughed in agonizing pain.
His chest on fire, Anon von Doom sat up in bed screaming as the same firey pain still coursed through his chest.
“Are you alright my Lord?” Olivia asked as she dashed into his room.
Running on adrenaline he shakily ruffled her mane. “I’m fine Olivia, just a bit of acid reflux.” The couple of coughs that followed did nothing to reassure her.
Clambering up onto their bed, she demi-curled up on his chest. As he continued to stroked her mane, Anon began to wonder, what was panicking about? Shrugging his shoulders he slowly drifted off to sleep, unaware of the prophetic dream he had just had.
Until there were footsteps in the halls. He had heard the knocking, yes, he had even heard the door opening, sure. But it was just some noise right? Some creaking footsteps in the night?
The door to Anon’s room creaked open as the aforementioned human worked his under the covers and pretended to be sleeping. Well, he would have, had Olivia not pinned him in place with her body.
A bat pony stepped into the room, wings of silvery blue held close to her barrel as her yellow eyes looked about the room. While her mane matched her wings in color and tone, her pure white coat set her apart from any other bat pony that Anon von Doom had seen.
Of course it would be her. It was always her. He groaned tiredly as Desert Bloom, his arch nemesis, stalked into the room.
“Eh, what’s up doc?” She asked, in her annoying and typical comedic method of greeting others. What was even worse was that they were taylored.
“A double reference Bloom, and this late at night?” He retorted, his voice clearly stating a whole paragraph about how people do not appreciate being woken up in the middle of the night, especially by their arch nemesis.
Rubbing his eyes, he conceded the silence contest. “So what do you want?” he asked tiredly.
“I know it’s late, and I’m sorry, but I’ve got some big news for you.” Bloom paused as she thought of what else there was. “Ah yes, I also brought by some food from Applejack so you wouldn’t starve.” She finished, putting up her hooves on the edge of the bed.
Anon stared at her curiously before asking his next question. “So what is it like to have hooves?”
“Come again?” Bloom asked, pretending to be ignorant. All she did was cause to Anon von Doom to appear even more miffed.
“What. Is. It. Like. To. Have. Hooves?” He asked again. Before she could retort with whatever she had in mind, he continued. “Only three people that I know of can make references like you make. And that’s Me, you, and Discord. Discord is an exception, because, well he’s Discord.” He said chuckling slightly. “Me, I can make them because I’m from an alternate world. Which means that you should only be able to make them because you are also from alternate world. So what is it like to have hooves?” He finished.
Desert Bloom looked shocked for a minute before smiling and laughing her crazy head of slightly. “Of course you figured it out. I always like it when people figure things out.” She said, returning to her old verbs. “But to answer your question, it’s like. . . it’s like anything really, you don’t know until you’ve tried it.”
“Hhmph. So what’s the news?”
“Oh! You have a relative that came to Equestria I think.”
“AH WHAT??!!”
“Yah, some mare by the name of Anonpencil came here from another world and was once a human. . . ”
“She can’t be here!” He cried out.
“But she is.” Bloom retorted.
“NOOOOOO!” Anon von Doom cried out in fear, waking up Olivia, who stabbed him for good measure to get him to be quiet again.
