Letters of Equestria

by Soothing Stone

Rating: teen
Tags: Derpy Hooves, Slice of Life, Sad, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Dark, Comedy, Dinky Hooves, Other, Random
Length: 6728

A look into the many letters sent throughout Equestria in a series of oneshots.

Within the nation of Equestria, ponies use letters to talk to those close and far away, each with their own story. Some are sad, others are humorous, others recall epic adventures of times past. In this series of oneshots, we'll take a look at some of them as they reveal the character of the ponies that write them.

A lot of characters are featured within the series, so don't read too much into the character tags. Five characters is too few.

Published 2012-08-04 11:14:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-08-07 01:35:08 UTC

Derpy, Dinky, and Cadence

Hi Dinky!

I know you just left a few minutes ago, but I didn't want you to wait for my first letter over there! You'll be great over in Canterlot, I just know it!

Ignore all the burn marks around the paper. I tried my hoof at homemade muffins, but it didn't work out so well. I'm just going to the Sugar Cube Corner from now on. I don't want to pay for another half dozen fire extinguishers again!

How is it in Canterlot? A pony that looked like a marshmallow told me all about it once she heard you're going to Magical Summer Camp. She says they all wear clothing like they need to cover something up. Now that's just silly! You don't need clothes, you're a pony! But she says there's a lot of unicorns, maybe they can teach you a few spells while you're there!

And how's Cadence? It must be amazing having her as your babysitter over there. She has wings AND a horn, and she's a princess! The last time I met a princess, I crashed into her while she was raising the sun, almost setting the entire time clock back thirty seconds.

Tell me how things are going, and I can't wait to see your letter!

Happy muffins,
Mom

Dear Mom,

It's weird in Canterlot. That marshmallow is right, everypony has clothes on, and they look really nice. One even sparkled in the sunlight, and I wanted to look at it all day. But then Cadence told me it's rude to stare at ponies like that. She's a lot like you.

Wait, there's a talking marshmallow in Ponyville? How didn't I know about it? Marshmallows are delicious!

There's no comfy dirt roads anywhere. It feels like stone everywhere I trot. I got used to it, but I want to go home already.

And Cadence is wonderful! She has some amazing stories to tell me, like the time she and her husband stopped a lot of changelings from destroying Equestria! She tells me that the camp is going to be hard, but she thinks I'll be really good. I don't know, I never moved anything with my horn before.

But she tells me not to worry about it. It took her a while before she learned how to use magic, and now she's so powerful she can defeat whole armies!

And don't worry about the burnt letter. It smells like a blueberry muffin, and that's my favorite flavor!

Miss you,
Dinky

Hi again Dinky,

She's not a marshmallow after all. I tried to take a bite and she tasted like some nasty perfume! The doctor says it might take a while for my wings to get better, she really wasn't happy that I thought she was a food.

I looked at the calender, and you start camp tomorrow! It's OK if you don't know anything about magic right now. That's why you're at that camp, so you can learn everything for the first time.

Cadence sounds wonderful, just like Twilight told me. That unicorn told me all the best stories too, about all the things they did together. She'll be a lot of fun if even half the stories are true.

No dirt roads? But how are you supposed to kick the ground if you get frustrated? Kick a rock over across the street? Hey, that sounds pretty fun...

Tell me how it goes tomorrow, and I'll see you again soon!

Hugs and snuggles,
Mom

Mom,

It was awful! One of the worst days of my life! Everypony made fun of me when I said I was from Ponyville. They kept calling me a backwards mule, so I tried really hard to learn the grip spell as hard as I could.

But I didn't learn anything either! I can't catch things in midair, I can't hold onto anything, I can't even make my horn glow! And they teased me even more, saying I was an Earth Pony who was messed up at birth with a horn! Why did I sign up for this stupid camp?

Cadence keeps telling me they're just bullies, and I shouldn't listen to them. But we got assigned to groups, and all of the ponies teasing me are in my group! I don't know what I'm going to do, this was so stupid! I'm an idiot for thinking I would be good at magic.

She's really trying to help me out, but I want you. Please come to Canterlot, please. I need you right now.

Dinky

To my dear daughter,

I'm so sorry! I didn't know everypony in Canterlot really was such a snob. But you should know I went through that too.

When I was a filly and I went to Flight School, everypony made a joke about my cross eyes. Everypony. On top of that, I couldn't fly straight for years. Every day after school I ran to my mother, asking why those ponies were so mean.

And she told me that I was better than those bullies. I was better than the name Cross Eyes they gave me at school. I was better than most fliers in Equestria, and I just needed to believe that.

I did believe it. After I did, I became a better flier with each passing day, because I worked hard to prove them wrong. It took some time, but eventually I graduated from Flight School at the top of my class.

I know it's not easy, and that their insults feel terrible. But right now, you're so young that anything can happen. Don't believe that you're a mule, believe you can be one of the best magicians that ever lived, and one day it will happen.

With love,
Your Mother

Dear Cadence,

Hello. It's cool that I can write to a princess, but I'm the mother of the filly you're foalsitting, Dinky Hooves. She told me everything that happened the past few days, and all I wish I could do right now is come down and hug her, to tell her everything is going to be OK. But I can't. My office is behind in the mail schedule right now, and I have no choice but to not take vacation days and stay in Ponyville.

But I trust you with my child right now. She's really sensitive I know, but she's one of the most amazing ponies you'll ever get to meet. Please take good care of her, like I know you can, just like you did with Twilight.

Just do whatever you can to help her out during camp this week. If she needs a shoulder to cry on, please do it. If she needs somepony to go with her to magical camp, I know you can be there to cheer her on.

I wish you two luck, and thank you for receiving this letter. It meant a lot to me you listened.

Signed,
Derpy Hooves
Chief Mailpony of Ponyville

To Derpy Hooves,

I think it means more to Dinky you wanted this for her. She has been going through a rough time, but even without your words I can see so much potential in her.

But it's heartbreaking to see her be like this. I hear her calling your name in her sleep every night. There's been a few times where she wakes up screaming, and I have to comfort her for an hour. I don't mind, but I'm as hopeful as you are that she finds her strength.

I will be there for her while she's still in Canterlot, and do not fret over what the other fillies and colts are going to say to her from now on. They're not going to argue with a princess, will they?

Signed,
Cadence

Mommy,

I took your advice, and now Cadence is coming along with me to camp! It's been so great today, she's been cheering me on like a big sister! Now nopony tries to make fun of me, but I don't know why. I think they all like Cadence a lot.

But I'm still not learning anything. My horn is starting to glow, but I can't cast anything yet. This is getting silly, I know I can do it.

Everything is great. I met Cadence's husband, this other pony that looks like a marshmallow with a blue mane, just like Rarity except she has a purple mane! I told him Cadence is becoming like my big sister, and he thought it was adorable. He told me they hope they can be parents soon, so she's a mother too. I don't know, she's fine just as my big sis.

Still, it's frustrating that I can't do any spells. Even though I think I can be as good as Twilight Sparkle, I'm not doing anything while everypony else already has gripped everything they could without getting in trouble. Thankfully, that doesn't include the teachers. They almost look like pegasi when they were up in the air!

See you in a few days,
Dinky

Hello Dinky,

Really? Trust me, you don't want to eat a marshmallow anytime soon. They like to kick back if you try to munch on them, so be careful out there.

Don't give up on the spells just yet. You're really close to casting your first ever, and I'm sure it will be like the first time I got off the ground. It was almost the best moment of my life, second only to the first time I met you.

And we'll see if Cadence wants to be your Canterlot sister. She'll be busy if she ever becomes a mother, take it from your own. But she's somepony you can put your faith in, believe me. I've seen what kind of character she is, and I wish she was my sis too.

Good luck out there,
Mom

To Derpy,

I know you've been believing me with Dinky's well being lately. And we have become close friends in only a few days. I hope this isn't the last time I see anypony in your family, because she's been showing me some of your letters and I would like to meet you soon.

And that's why I'm making this announcement to you first: I'm pregnant.

I cannot say just how excited Shining and I are. I will continue to watch over her, but this is one of the best days of my life. Since you're a mother yourself, what should I prepare for first? Is there a right way to do it, or is it OK if I do it my way?

Signed,
Princess Cadence, Mom To Be

Hey Mom,

I DID MY FIRST SPELL! I DID MY FIRST SPELL!

I used the grip one on myself, and I was even flying for a few minutes! Cadence flew with me, and it felt like a dream. I saw everypony in Canterlot up there at once, and I could even see Ponyville off in the distance, and I think it was you crashing into the Corner. I don't know, please don't ground me if I told Cadence you were the pony that was crashing everywhere.

And all the fillies and colts are warming up to me, especially the ones that were bulling me. You were right, all I had to do is believe I can do anything, and I did it!

But Cadence is acting funny. Her belly has some kind of growth, and every time I talk about it, she cries in joy and Shining has this weird grin on his face. I don't get it. Can you tell me what's the big deal?

She tells me I'm coming home tomorrow night, but I don't want to go! I like it here, and Cadence really is my big sis out here. Maybe we can visit while it's summer?

Signed,
Dinky

To Princess Cadence,

Dinky just came home last night. You should have seen the look on her face when she lifted me off the ground with her own horn! I felt really weird, but it was worth it for her expression.

My husband has come home after another time traveling episode, and even he can't believe how fast she is growing up.

I don't know how to thank you as much as you deserve. But I do have something in mind. You see, she told me you two were really close, and you want help on becoming a mother, right?

So I've been saving up for a while, and now I got thousands of bits. And I asked the head of all the mail services if I could change offices.

And here's my big announcement: We're moving to Canterlot. Then, Dinky can hang with you all the time, and I can help you and Shining while you become parents for the first time. It's going to take a lot of hard work, but I know you two are up to it.

Hope to see you soon,
Derpy Hooves
Newest Canterlot Mailpony

Trixie, Twilight, and Fluttershy

Dear Twilight Sparkle,

I don't know what you heard about me all these months, but it's Trixie. No, not the Great and Powerful Trixie anymore. Just Trixie.

There is no reason I should ask for your apology. Even though I ran out of town and nopony there has heard of me since then, I managed to find Las Pegasus and they love me! I have my own running show that runs twice a week, and I always get a stomping ovation at the end of the night. And that's on top of a big paycheck every month. I might be able to purchase my own house at Canterlot at the end of the year.

But I hate it here. All the ponies are crude, filthy beings, and I lost count of how many pickup lines stallions have given me. And right now, my hotel room is not for me. I see stains all over the wallpaper, and it reeks of old lettuce.

I just want to get out of here, and it's all because of what I've done in Ponyville that I'm here. If I come back to Ponyville, will you promise none of your friends try to tear my head off?

Please,
Trixie

To Trixie,

I don't know. Just to make sure, I talked about you to my friends a few hours ago, and a lot of them are still pretty hurt about it. You never said sorry after I had to come in and save Ponyville, you just ran away and never looked back.

Look, I know it's awful living like that for the time being. But you yourself said you could be moving to Canterlot soon. It's going to be tough, but you have to keep going on. And don't get arrogant around the ponies you meet, or else it's only going to happen again where you'll find a town you like and have to run away in the end. I'm sorry, but unless you apologize in person, I don't think my friends will ever want to see your face again.

Sorry,
Twilight Sparkle

Twilight,

Yes I'm moving to Canterlot, yes it's going to be better than Las Pegasus. But...I don't know what's going to happen after that day. That's what's bothering me. If even one word gets out about what I've done, nopony will want to give me any job, and that's a place that's FULL of jobs for magicians!

Do you know what that's like? You had so many hopes for excellence, so many dreams you wanted to go for, and now every door except entertainment has been shut. You might not, you're the princess' student for her sake!

I couldn't think of any other to talk to, and I'm willing to admit I was wrong. If I go to Ponyville, I'll gladly say I'm sorry to all of your friends, maybe I'll even work with you somehow. Just please take me in.

Again, please,
Trixie

Sorry Trixie,

I can't. There is nothing for you here. I told them how sorry you are, and they accepted your apology. But I don't have anything for you to do here. I have two assistants already, I don't need another anytime soon, it's already easy as it is.

I wish there was something I could work out for you, but I can't. You'll have to find your way in Canterlot. And before you fret and think it's all over, not everypony knows about you yet. There's still hope for you, just don't give up on it. Can you do that for me?

Perhaps you could stay at Fluttershy's cottage for a while? She has a lot of room in there, and I'm sure I can get her to do something for you.

Signed,
Twilight Sparkle

To Twilight,

Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you. I send my own letter to Fluttershy to see if she will give me a room, and she said yes. I'm getting my bags together right now, and it won't be long until I find the next taxi to Ponyville. It's going to be great...I hope. I'm not going to show off my talent, regardless how much I do possess. It's not worth it.

And I know I'll find some kind of work in that town. Unicorns aren't as rare as they think, because I've been there and I'm talking to a unicorn who lives right in the middle of things.

One last thing before I go: What exactly can I do for a job right now? My plan is still to travel to Canterlot, but I'll get the rest of the bits I need in Ponyville.

Thank you,
Trixie

Trixie,

I have an idea! Since she's accepted your apology, maybe you could work with Rarity? She could always use the assistance, and as long as you listen to her on making dresses, you should fit right in. You can use your horn for it, so it's something right up your alley.

Just be careful out there in Las Pegasus. Rainbow Dash tells me some places can be really dangerous at night, but you're a gifted magician, even if you have some self-entitlement problems...

Fluttershy's been telling me all about it. She's been busy getting your room ready, and you're going to be just fine. She is nervous about it, she's never had a houseguest since she had three fillies sleep over one time. The less said about it the better.

See you soon,
Twilight Sparkle

To Twilight,

You cannot imagine what happened last night. It's the worst night of my life, and I don't know how I'm going to get past this.

I didn't get your advice about Las Pegasus until it was too late. I performed my last show, and I trotted back to my room. And in an alley, a bunch of these tough stallions came and robbed me, and I was only able to keep enough for a taxi ride to Ponyville.

That was everything to me. Everything. My hopes to move to Canterlot, gone. All gone, and I have to start over. It took me months to get that many bits, and it was a high paying job! I must get out of here immediately, but it could take years before I have enough bits again!

I'm still going to take that taxi ride, Las Pegasus is too dangerous for me now. But what am I supposed to do now?

Anything will help,
Trixie

Trixie,

That's terrible! Sounds like a nightmare, but I'm glad they didn't do anything worse to you after that. It might not seem like it, but you were lucky that evening. Trust me.

But it doesn't help your problem, does it? There is something I can do for you there. You should have gotten a bag with this letter, and inside is two hundred bits. That isn't a whole lot, but it's a start you desperately need right now.

Do not give up on your dreams one bit. This might seem like something you can't get out of, but that's probably what you thought after you fled Ponyville, and look how far you got before. You have something inside, something that can take you back to Canterlot, but you can't quit right now. Come to Ponyville, get a fresh start, whatever you need to do. Just show me you got more left in the tank.

Fluttershy has your room ready, by the way. She's willing to give you a few extra bits on top once you get here, and it's a lot. So what are you waiting for?

Come to Ponyville,
Twilight Sparkle

To a Ms. Twilight Sparkle,

This is Officier Steel Bars of the Las Pegasus Police Department. In our investigation report, you were close friends to Trixie, but have not been informed of what has occured with her three days ago.

Three days ago, around 11:00 PM, she received a letter from you containing two hundred(200) bits. After receiving this letter, she informed the landlord after one last payment that she was leaving Las Pegasus for good. However, the landlord did not want Trixie to leave, and tried to appeal to her to stay.

Once she had left and went for a taxi stop, the landlord rounded up a few friends and stalked her, trapping the unicorn in a back alley.

Again the landlord pleaded for Trixie to stay and keep paying him rent, noting the two hundred(200) bits you had delivered. She refused, and they ganged up on her, cutting her horn off in the process. After that, she passed out and was found by a bystander, who took her to the hospital. Had it not been for him, Trixie might have been dead by now and forgotten.

She was unconscious for the next two days, and only now has she awakened, in great pain. Trixie is asking for you to see her, saying "she is the only true friend I have right now."

Thank you for your cooperation.

Dear Fluttershy,

I'm sorry I left on such short notice, but I had to travel immediately to Los Pegasus. A bunch of stallions cut off Trixie's horn, and I need to be there for her. Please keep a good eye on Spike, he can take care of himself but he can also get carried away at times.

Signed,
Twilight Sparkle

Twilight Sparkle,

That sounds awful, just awful! Why would somepony do that to anypony? That's just mean and evil!

Spike should be no problem. But please tell Trixie how sorry I feel for her, and everypony in Ponyville too. Will she be OK?

Fluttershy

Many days later...

To Fluttershy,

Yes and no. Because she lost her horn, she can't practice magic again for the rest of her life. But she will recover from the other beatings, and she'll be coming out soon.

But I have to take care of her, maybe for the rest of her life. She's so emotionally devasted that she wants me there with her every second, and there's been nights she wants me to sleep in her bed so "they don't get me again."

I feel so terrible for her, and I can't help but think what would happen I lost my horn. But I need to do everything I can so she can hopefully recover mentally one day.

She still wants to move to Ponyville, but she might have to stay in my house from now on. Is that fine with you? She's gotten so close to me that I was the only one she wanted to see when she came to.

Sincerly,
Twilight Sparkle

Dear Twilight,

If that's what you and Trixie want. Could I come over to Las Pegasus? I really want to help her in any way I can.

And Spike hasn't been a problem so far. He seems eager to visit the spa when I'm going there, maybe it has to do with my spa date with Rarity?

Please let me know what else I can do,
Fluttershy

Fluttershy,

It's really nice you would do that, but stay in Ponyville for now. She's going to check out tomorrow and I'm taking her home after that. Just sit tight, and you'll be able to do everything you want to help Trixie soon.

Thanks for taking care of Spike,
Twilight Sparkle

To Fluttershy,

Twilight showed me all the letters you've been sending her since...that day. And I have no words to say other than thank you. You were trying to help me out when I had few friends, and you and Twilight are the closest I've had my whole life.

I don't know how to repay you. I have to learn how to live without a horn now, but I have to keep going. That's what Twilight said, and I believe her. But I need both of your help from now on. I don't want anypony harming me like that...please, never again.

I cannot tell you how grateful I will be to see you in person, because I know how fortunate Twilight is to have you for a friend.

See you soon,
Trixie

Garble and Celestia

To the mamby pampy pony that gets this,

Is this working? Hello? My friends are trying to find out if this whole letter blowing business works like it did with Spike. But when they said it might get sent to one of the ponies in Equestria, I laughed my head off! Why would I talk to some pony that runs away when I huff and puff around?

I dion't even care. All dragons can do it, but why doesn't anybody ever use this thing? Seems like a good idea to me. And experimenting with a few scraps of paper, it was wicked to see something turn into a wisp and float off to someplace sounds promising. So write back so I know where you live.

Signed,
Garble

Garble,

So are you the dragon that's been sending me all these blank pieces of paper? I keep asking Spike if he is pulling a bunch of pranks by sending me blank letters, but now I know you are to blame.

I don't know who you think you are in your horde, but I will not respond to any threats you will make to my kingdom by just standing by and read these. Make your demands, and I'll make sure you don't set one claw in Equestria.

This is your only warning,
Celestia
Princess of Equestria

It's Celestia?

Oh, this is just too rich! Not only did I become pen pals with a pony, but YOU, the most pushover of all of them! Please, what are you going to do to me? Push me lightly with a hoof covered in a sandal you won't want to crack? Try to poke me with your horn? Or flap me with your wings? You can't be serious, we're all laughing that you're actually trying.

Wait, you mean THAT Spike? Yeah, that was him that pulled the prank on you. He is an evil dragon, and shouldn't be trusted. I should know, I almost saw him as a little brother and then what does he do? He sides with YOU and your FRIENDS!

And we're fine just right where you are. Keep writing and we can laugh all the time. In fact, could you send another letter telling us how you're coming down to defeat our hoard? We need the laughs.

Please write back,
Garble

To Garble,

Is this how you see me? A joke? I have lifted the sun using my own strength, and all who bother to learn the truth know about it. Along with my sister, we defeated the very spirit of chaos incarnate, and we alone keep harmony inside the stars. All you have done is threaten Spike and his friends, and you will not have that kind of fun again.

And I don't believe your obvious lies about Spike for one second. It is clear from his letters you came very close to corrupting him, and that you are a foul being yourself.

Eventually, you cannot expect this "pen pal" thing to continue for much longer if you think I'll just keep accepting insult after insult like this. I'm sure your mother would be very proud, but I am not amused.

Signed,
Celestia
Princess of Your Life

Hi again Celestia,

What do you have for entertainment over in Equestria? Is it a bunch of carnivals? Wait, I got it! You have a bunch of deathmatches in the streets all the time! Well, that's what my friends say. Here in the caves, it's your letters that keep us entertained.

Seriously, you're just like Spike's friends when they tried to stop us. Did they ever tell you about that? They were all so ready to buck our hinds like we were other ponies, but when we huffed and got our claws out, they ran away like little babies! Though they say you're more powerful, that just means you'll survive 20 seconds when they wimp out after 10.

Corrupt poor little Spike? If anything, we almost made him better and got the pony out of him! You should have seen him for that one day he was like us, I was so proud of that little tyke. He survived the most brutal belly flop of all time, and partied like he's been part of the hoard all his life!

Now back to you. I know this whole insult routine is getting on your nerves, but we're having the time of our lives. How about we scale back on the insults, and you'll just keep threatening us? That way, we both get what we want!

Pen Pal for Life
Garble

To Garble,

I will not be called just another of your Pen Pals. Do you understand me? There is no way I can just endure your lack of concern that you're tempting me to find where you live and destroy everything you hold dear, just to wupe off your arrogance and prove nobody can get away with what you're doing.

However, I agree to your terms. As long as you hold back on your insults and decide not to invade Equestria at all, we will continue to talk. That way, I know what you're up to, and I will make sure you have not set Ponyville or any other town on fire.

Continue with the letters, and don't think I'm just a friend to you.

Signed,
Princess Celestia

To Garble,

When you get this letter, run away from your friends and find cover. This should be hidden inside the other letter and this one is for your eyes only. Make sure the rest do not know this exists, for it is of grave importance that you read it.

Even though it is true my student has a dragon for an assistant, the one named Spike, we ponies do not know much about dragon culture. In previous attempts to learn about it in observations and interviews, many professionals have come back running for their lives, or missing altogether with the assumed reason being the dragon killed them.

I might have tried to keep you in line with the previous threats, but in reality I was thrilled to get a letter from a dragon deep within its species' culture. You are not shaped by our lifestyle like Spike is, and through you we can learn a lot about how your life is like.

There is no reason why you should trust me. If word gets out about what you have done if you agree to this, you might be banished from your hoard. But in exchange, we will be eternally grateful that you have done this incredible deed for us. I understand your choice no matter what you choose, and wish you luck if you do decide to help us out.

Signed,
Celestia
Princess of the Sun

To Princess Celestia,

What? Why should I help you out? You should know I don't like ponies much. I got onto Spike when I first met him for being like a pony in a dragon costume!

And you're right that I would get banished if anybody here found out. We like to make games about our hatred for your kind. Heck, there's been times where we've used some of the paper we found to make paper maches in the shapes of ponies and punch them out, throwing them into lava!

Yes, I know you would hold me as a hero, and come to think about it, I wouldn't mind telling you about how we do things around here. But the risk is too great. They know when I'm writing, and I had to escape the cave and say I was going on a hunt just to get away with this letter. Explaining even a little snippet of what you want to know would take hours, and they're not that patient.

I would need something to fall back on if I get exiled, and a guarantee that if I have to run to Equestria for shelter, none of your guards will come out and attack me. Because otherwise, I can't do this. I love the hoard I'm in, and I don't know what I would do if I was kicked out of it.

Signed,
Garble

Garble,

I didn't say you had to do this. This might be the toughest decision you will ever have to make, and I did say I would understand if you said no to the offer. It is difficult to pull someone out from their roots, and that could be why Spike had difficulty fitting in to your clan for so long.

That said, I can guarantee something for you in case you experience exile. You see, I know where you live. I know exactly where you wrote this. I saw you write your previous letter out in the forest, so in case your other dragons try to kill you for helping me, I can come down to save you.

In the case that you are exiled, there is in fact something I have in mind. If you do this, many ponies will be grateful for your work, and therefore you might be more accepted within Equestria. As a result, I might be able to find you another cave within my borders, and we will pay you handsomely and you will not have to worry about what my guards will do, as you will have special protection and it will be a crime to harm you, even though you can take care of yourself just fine I'm sure.

But don't think this will be a license to do anything like you did with Spike. I don't want you talking to him, or behaving anylike like that to anypony you meet.

Again, this is probably the hardest choice you will ever have to make in your life, and do what you deem necessary. And to keep your cover, there should be another letter full of threats inside this one.

Signed,
Princess Celestia

To the foul dragon,

Do you realy think we cannot stop you? We can find you if we so desired to, and there is a multitude of ways we can crush your horde. Along with my sister Luna, we are invinceable and will not be trifled with.

That said, we do not believe you are such a threat deserving of that punishment yet. You stay in the comforts of your little mountain, and we will not show you the brunt of our force.

Your Last Warning,
Celestia
Master of the Cosmos

To Celestia,

Oh really? What's your idea of the brunt of your force? We all know you're like a cardboard box, all we have to do is breathe fire at you and that's it for your existance! Please try harder than that. And can you really move the sun and the moon like I heard? I'm sure we could do it five times over, that's how much more powerful we really are!

But then again, we wouldn't want "somepony" like you to go away so soon. Seriously, I haven't had this much fun since...ever. I'm having the time of my life with this, and please, please keep going. Wait...does that break our agreement? Oh well, I'm going to do it anyway.

See ya later,
Garble

Princess Celestia,

They're buying the cover so far. It was hard to hide the real letter, but I managed to do it anyway.

Please do not send a response letter to this one specifically, but I accept your offer. I don't know when I can send letters detailing dragon culture, they're going to be looking around if they find out some dragon's been sending letters like this to you. I think it's worth the risk, but you might want to get that cave you promosed ready. This is a secret that probably won't stay hidden for long.

I'll need a list of things you want to know about dragons, and I'll get to work on it shortly.

Thank you,
Garble

Garble,

I cannot begin to appreciate this decision you just made. This could be momumental for pony-dragon relations, and they'll remember you long after you're gone for such a bold action. After this is all over, I'll come to your cave in person to thank you, I don't think you'll ever fully understand what you're doing.

As requested, I have enclosed a list of things ponies would want to know about your species. It was so long I had to enclose it into another letter, my apologies for the extra bulk. Another thing I attached is a map of Equestria. I have dotted green your current location, and your new cave will be where the red dot is. It is a cavernous one, and even when you're full grown you should be able to have a lot of space to move around in.

Once more I have to give my thanks to you. I look forward to your writings, and all of Equestria is grateful for your service.

Signed,
Celestia

To Princess Celestia,

It finally happened. After what felt like the thousandth letter about our history, the horde found out about our pen pal service. I had to go through so many beatings before they finally let me go. It's been a week since they threw me down the mountain, that's how long it took to recover from the wounds. I'm really lucky I put all the writing materials in the forest, or else that would have been the last time you heard from me.

I had to flee for that cave you mentioned, and I was blown away. There's so many layers and rooms to it, and there's even an indoor waterfall throughout the cave. It might be hard to be exiled from a horde you founded, but this makes for a good start.

Now that I'm getting back to a routine, I should finish up on the history lesson soon, and that wraps it up on everything I know about my kind. How's that?

Signed,
Garble

For Garble,

There's a lot of things I want to say, but before I do, I want to give my apologies for your exile. I knew you ran the risk of it, but I was still hopeful it would not come to this.

That out of the way, this is one of the biggest discoveries we ever had the privilege of discovering. My scholars are hard at work on turning your notes into textbooks, and when they release it will be one of the most historical days Equestria has ever known.

Now, to discuss your payment. For every subject you agreed to cover, you shall receive the gem equivalent of 10,000 bits, and since you are credited as co-author on all future textbooks, you will get a third of all the profits they will receive, and we're expecting every copy ever made to be sold.

One more benefit is that you will be knighted in my castle for your services, and if you find you want to talk with me in person, you will have the right to do so.

Equestria will remember you forever, as they have the right to do so.

Thank you forever,
Princess Celestia