Scoota-who?!

by HeroOfOOO

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Drama, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Profanity, Scootaloo, Violence
Length: 11526

A human suddenly wakes up in Equestria as Scootaloo.

"Out of all people, it had to be me..."
"Out of all ponies, it had to be Scootaloo..."

I'm just a regular bike courier. I deliver stuff that may or may not be illegal from one place to another. Let's just say, I'm pretty good at what I do. One day, my little sister got me a sticker of Scootaloo's cutie mark. I placed it on my bike. Turns out, placing My Little Pony stickers on your bike gets you killed. I got into a truck accident on the day I put that sticker on my bike. Imagine being crushed... I actually thought I was dead.

Until I woke up on a cloud 50 meters from the ground with no way of knowing how I got here and how I can get down.

After making that disaster of a Scootlaoo fic back in 2014, I thought I might be able to redeem the past with this. Hope y'all like it!

Published 2018-11-26 04:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-09-07 11:35:14 UTC

Prologue: Bicycle

Scoota-who?!

By: Luna Phobos

In life, there are times you don’t get your fair share of the world’s big apple pie. An apple pie meant to provide for everyone in this world. For some goddamn reason, some people got more shares than all the rest of us. Greedy bastards… That’s why I buy apple pie from McDonalds.

My name is Shaun. I refuse to use my last name for several reasons I don’t want to delve into. I’m about 21 years old, and I work as a bike courier to support Carrie, my little sister, and her education. It’s a risky job, but it pays well. I need the money to pay rent, food, and the yearly tuition. Life’s been like this for years now, ever since I decided to leave my parents and their sickening lifestyle. That should give you at least a reason why I don’t like to share my goddamn last name. As a bike courier, I may or may not be delivering drugs or some other illegal crap. To be honest, I don’t care. They can ruin their lives for all I care. As long as I get the money to see me and my little sister okay, those people with the bigger slice of that apple pie can go fuck themselves.

“One apple pie, please.” I said to the McDonalds cashier. “And some Fanta please.”

Yeah, as you can tell, I love the crappy breading filled with sweet hot apple mush that McDonalds sells. It’s a quick and tasty snack when you’re on the road, biking to the destination. Once I got my order, I slid part of the pie out of its cardboard container and took a bite. It was pretty hot, but I’m used to eating very hot food in order to save time going to the next destination. I got my drink and pie, paid the cashier, and went on my way. It was a great time to finally buy a cup holder for my bike because before getting that, I’d always try my best staying alive on the streets by steering the handlebars with one hand. I placed the drink of Fanta on the bike’s cup holder, and the bitten apple pie on the bike’s basket, beside the package.

“Another day…” I muttered to myself. “Another delivery.” Kicking back the stand, I pedalled as fast as I can to the destination. There were obstacles in the way like fallen over trash cans, sleeping hobos, and sidewalk ledges, but these meant nothing to me. I always felt that my bike was an attachment to me, it was like an extra body part. Maybe it’s because I’ve been biking ever since I left my parents. Maybe it’s a metaphor that, without this bike, I couldn’t afford any money to give my sister a roof over her head, food on her plate, and knowledge on her mind. With this in mind, I always find a way to pass through any hurdle. I bounce. Easier said than done, unless you’ve been biking for years. Nearly grafting my tires on that hobos face, I made it. Nobody was hurt, and my bike is in ship shape. The house looked like any other house who’d ask a bike courier to deliver for them… A crack shack. Usually, I’d knock on the wooden door, drop the package by their doorstep, and leave as fast as I can. That’s the usual routine I came up with after that big ol’ accident during my first days in the bike courier business. With every routine, it shall be followed. I knocked, dropped, and left. Once that’s done, I come back to the small house where bike couriers get their money from.

“Nice job, Shaun. You successfully delivered the package on time.” said the big ol’ lookin guy. He looks like someone you’d see in an action movie, holding two tommy guns, shooting and screaming. “Here’s the payment.”

Fifty bucks… It’s enough, I suppose.

I got on my bike, ate my apple pie and drank my Fanta, and went home, satisfied with the amount I gained for today. Went back to my apartment. It didn’t look all too good, but it was good enough for me and my sister. I got the keys in my pocket and opened the door. The living room was pretty small, and the bedrooms were smaller. In the living room, I saw my little sister, being studious as usual by reading a book. At least she cares about education more than I did.

“Oh, hi there big bro!” she said as she noticed me. “How’s work?”

“Pretty good, sis. How’s studies?”

“It’s ‘how are your studies’.” she giggled.

“Well, you know me sis. I don’t have time to study. I’m busy here giving us chow.” I chuckled. “Not to mention the rent.”

“I know. One day, we’re all going to live better lives.” she said as she stared up at the ceiling. “Don’t you think?”

“Well duh.” I said as I made my way to my bedroom. “The two of us are going to live better lives.”

“Not just the two of us, Shaun.” she said seriously. “The people who’re like us. People who lived with lives like this.”

I paused for a second and thought about it. I looked back at my sister, who was still sitting down on the living room sofa, reading her book.

“You’re goddamn right.”

“I bought this for you, as a good luck charm!” she said cheerfully as she gave me a sticker which appeared to be a crest with the colors red, pink, and violet, with a pink lightning bolt.

I raised an eyebrow at her. “What is it?”

“It’s Scootaloo’s cutie mark!” she giggled.

“Scoota-who?”

“It’s one of my favorite characters from My Little Pony!”

You know, I sometimes forget my little sister is 11 at some points. Like yesterday, that was some wisdom for a kid her age. Usually, kids would break windows by throwing rocks and steal money from convenience stores. I’m glad Carrie was an innocent kid.

“Ponies?”

“Yeah! I saved up a lot of money just to buy this for you!” she smiled. “The mister at the shop said that it’s a very good sticker to put on bikes!”

It was a pretty high quality vinyl sticker. Perfect for the front of my basket… Even though I have no idea what My Little Pony was, I felt a rush of happiness in my heart knowing that my sister saved up all her money just to buy me this.

I patted her on the head and messed her hair around. “You’re a good kid, Carrie. Thank you!”

“It’s the only thing I could do for my B.B.B.F.F.!”

“A wha-?”

“Big Brother Best Friend Forever, silly!” she said as she hugged me. “Now you go now, and do your work!”

“Heh sure, Carrie!”

The school wasn’t far from here. It was a walk away. I’d always offer Carrie a ride on my bike, but she said that I shouldn’t waste too much time on her; that I should spend most of my time on trying to do my bike courier business. Before I got started, I placed the neat vinyl sticker in the front of my basket.

“Lookin good…” I said as I placed that sticker. It looked like I was working for a company that used this symbol. It looked like one of those shield symbols that my sister was studying one time. Oh what was it? The Crusades? Even though this symbol was from some little kids show, the symbol looked pretty good! It didn’t look too girly, and it was a gift from my sister too! Why wouldn’t I show it off?!

I begun pedalling off to the bike courier service building. It was just a few blocks away, nothing I couldn’t handle. With my bike, everything felt like a stunt course. Jumping over trash cans, grinding on railings, and other bike tricks? It’s what I do. Anything to reach the destination on time. Now, I felt very cautious not to get a single scratch on this vinyl sticker of mine. It was a gift from my sister, and I can’t let anything ever happen to it!

Well, that was until I felt an excruciating amount of pain hit me on the left side as I just flew from my bike onto the sidewalk. I took deep breaths, and closed my eyes.

This is how it ends, huh?

I could barely hear through my left ear, but I could hear a loud truck horn faintly on my right ear, as well as the gasps from the people who happened to be nearby my body.

Carrie!

With that single word in my mind echo throughout this entire thing, I tried moving, but to no avail. My entire left side just felt nothing. My right side was twitching, in an effort to at least move. I opened my eyes to see what was going on, but I could only open one of them. I looked around with one eye and saw many people were shocked, horrified, and other words to describe horror. I then turned to myself. My body all mangled. No man could live through this. My brain had to process its inevitable fate.

I haven’t said goodbye! Carrie!

God damn it, I can’t die yet… I felt someone touching my body, probably the paramedics trying to lift my body, still squirming. With all the effort I had, I took in my last breath and shouted as best as I can.

“Carrie Turner! Thank you for everything you’ve done!”

And with that, I closed my eyes, hoping that the pain would just go away.

Cold. Air is thin. Is this what it feels like to be dead? It doesn’t feel too bad. I still felt my body. I felt no pain, yet some parts were numb. I couldn’t feel my hands, and I still feel like my legs are broken from the impact due to how they were… not in its right place. The surface beneath me felt very comfortable, like the softest cotton I’ve ever felt. That, or I’m sleeping on a hospital bed. I really hope it’s the latter, meaning that I’m still alive. I finally decided to open my eyes.

Sky.

I saw the sky, the bluest of blue. It’s as if there was no pollution.

Sunset.

The sun looked majestic that it’s not blocked my smoke and smog caused by cars.

Clouds.

There were clouds all around me. If that were the case, then that could mean one thing.

“I’m dead.”

Chapter 1: Angels?

Author's Note

//UPDATE 11/29/2018 8:54PM// "Edited some stuff"

Chapter 1: Angels?

“I’m dead.”

A child’s voice had spoken up. I looked around to see who it was. Confused, I spoke up again.

“I’m… dead?” It was surreal to have a kid’s voice come out of me.

What is going on? I looked around myself. I was in clouds, yes. The sky was beautiful, indeed it was. The sunset was mesmerizing, well said.

This was heaven. I thought to myself.

I then looked at myself to see if I still had anything that was, y’know, me. “Wh-what the--?” An orange fur coat? The lack of hands? Some sort of animal snout on my face? And… wings?

Although I wasn’t well versed in education, my sister told me about the different interpretations of angels because man could not comprehend the images of angels. One of them was a flaming wheel with eyes all around. Looked more like some monster rather an angel in my opinion. Right now, I’m more confused.

“What the fuck am I?!” I said with futile efforts, knowing that nobody is here with me in heaven. I then looked at my body more, and saw something familiar: Carrie’s Sticker.

“Carrie!” I yelled out to myself. With that name in my head, I needed to tell her I’m fine up here in heaven as her… favorite character? I don’t care! I tried running across the field of clouds until I saw the edge. A fifty-fucking-meter drop down to the ground. I cringed a bit looking below. I was never a big fan of heights.

I then tried to think about it. What would Carrie do? “You know what, fuck it.” I jumped off. I was still chuckling to myself that a little girl’s voice just said ‘fuck it’. I felt the wind brushing against my face, the adrenaline of skydiving rushing through my veins… well, whatever skydiving felt like.

Thirty-five meters.

Gotta stay cool. Gotta stay cool… Wait, I have wings right?

Twenty-eight meters.

Maybe I can fly. Angels can fly right? Okay. Wings, do your thing.

Twenty-five meters.

Okay, turns out these wings are useless. Wait a minute, if Angels have wings, that means that if they fall, they die right?

Twenty meters.

Can angels really die? I mean, they're God's servants. I don't think they can die... can they?

Ten meters.

Didn’t Satan fall down from heaven and fell through the ground? Because of that, he went straight to hell, right?

Eight meters.

Okay, I regret this… A lot.

“Heeeeeeeeeeeeeelp!” I screamed, hoping that someone or something can save me.

Suddenly, a blue blur caught me mid air. It was faster than anything I’ve ever done on my bike before. To be fair, this was faster than any car I’ve ever seen before!

“Don’t worry, I got you squirt!” I heard the blue blur say as it flew over some trees and rocks.

The blue blur dropped me down on some green grass. The blur finally stopped and settled. It revealed itself. A… horse?! A blue one at that!

“Are you an angel?” I’m pretty sure I’d react some other way if a horse with rainbow mane and tail, with wings, and some kind of but tattoo of a cloud and a rainbow thunderbolt, but I’m dead, aren’t I?

She just looked confused and concerned. “Uhh, Scootaloo, you okay?” She asked, raising one of her eyebrows. “You know me! I’m Rainbow Dash! The number one flyer in Equestria!”

“Scoota-who?!” I exclaimed. Wait a minute… Did she say Scootaloo? My sister’s favorite character...

She facepalmed, well, facehooved. “Scootaloo! You’re the president of my fan club!”

“No, I am not!” I yelled back. “I don’t know who this Scootaloo is, or who you are. I just want to find my little sister!”

Rainbow Dash, looking more confused than concerned. “Scoots, what in Celestia are you talking about?!”

Tears started forming in my eyes. “Send me back to Earth please! You’re an angel, right?! Tell me you can send me back to whatever hospital bed you can find! I just want to see my little sister again!” I started sobbing.

The blue horse wrapped her forelegs around me into a warm embrace. “I don’t know what the hay happened to you, Scootaloo, but I ain’t gonna leave my number one fan crying.”

The hug felt genuine, as if Carrie was just there hugging me that morning at the day of the accident. I hugged her back, feeling all the emotion there is to feel in a hug as warm as this.

“Please, I just want to see my little sister…” I muttered while I lay my head against her. I was getting exhausted from the recent rush of adrenaline that I’d just experienced… and crying. I fell asleep on Rainbow Dash’s arms, my tears drying up on her.

“Applebloom?” the marshmallow coated filly said to the yellow filly.

“Yeah, Sweetie Belle?” the filly known as Applebloom replied.

“I’m worried about Scootaloo.” Sweetie Belle said. “Ever since I showed her that book on ‘Theory of Balance: Magic of the Underpony’... She hasn’t been hanging out with us!”

“Eeyup.” Applebloom nodded. “What did that book have anyway?”

“Just some simple magic spells a pony with slight disabilities can use. And only with disabilities.” Sweetie Belle emphasized. “I thought it would’ve been a good thing to show Scootaloo.”

Applebloom, with a smug look on her face, said “So you gave her a book because she’s ‘disabled’...”

“I thought it’d be good.”

“Ah guess. Ah would’ve done the same thang.”

“Waiter, two more milk shakes please!” Sweetie Belle called out. The two got their order, and started drinking together. Their drinking time was interrupted until the familiar blue pegasus barged in, carrying an unconscious Scootaloo.

“Scootaloo!” the two fillies said in unison as they say the orange filly lay unconscious on Rainbow Dash’s back.

“What happened?” said the concerned Sweetie Belle.

“I don’t know.” Rainbow Dash said. “I was kind of worried. I was watching her ever since this morning. She was reading a book while chanting something. I couldn’t say what she was saying.”

Applebloom then shot out a stink-eye at Sweetie Belle, who was hastily drinking her milkshake nervously.

“And then she decided to jump out of the clouds! If it weren’t for me, she would’ve been dead!”

Sweetie Belle swallowed a lump in her throat… and several sips of that milkshake.

“And worst of all…” Rainbow Dash tensed up. “She doesn’t even know who she is!”

With that, Sweetie Belle fainted. Either from the shock or the brain freeze.

“His condition is critical. It’s going to be a difficult operation.”

“Carrie Turner?”

“Y-yes?”

“I think it’s time for you to go home.”

Chapter 2: Disabled

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter 3: Magic?

Focus your inner energy.

Imagine holding it within your hooves.

I read the words written on the old book. "Seems like one of those weird books in Kung Fu Hustle. I'm a horse, might as well give it a shot." I closed the book and put it down in front of me. I got up on all fours (it is still pretty lost to me on how I got used to walking like a horse in such a short time... now that I'm thinking about it, why haven't I noticed it before?) and then focused on a flower vase. I put out my han- I mean, hoof, and tried doing the force grab from Star Wars.

"Focus your inner energy. Imagine holding it." I felt a surge coming out of my hoof, I saw a purple aura emanate from my hoof. I then looked at the vase and noticed that it also had the same aura. "Woah... That's awesome!" I raised my hoofs to the air in excitement, then noticed that I still haven't let go of the vase. The vase flew up in the air and shattered on the ceiling of the treehouse. The shards went everywhere, I then tried blocking with my arm- foreleg, whatever, hoping no shards of glass would ever go in my eye... (Traumatizing moment during my bike courier service. Crazy, right?) But instead of having lots of glass be stabbing me in certain parts of my body, the glass never got to me. I removed my foreleg from my eyes and saw that my hooves were glowing very brightly with the same purple aura, and a transparent dome of the same color surrounded me.

"A forcefield? You've got to be kidding me. Is this fantasy, or science fiction?" I chuckled to myself, and sighed in relief that no glass would get this ass. The shards were everywhere. Somebody could get hurt. Well, I got magic, so I don't care if anybody gets hurt... Except for, of course, Carrie. Probably Craig too... God damn it, I'm reminding myself of them.

"If I'm going to get back to Earth, I need to find God and tell Him to send me back." I say to myself.

Applebloom yawned as she woke up on her bed, the light of Celestia's graceful sun shining upon her face. "G'mornin, Sweetie Belle." she greeted, but was met with no reply. She looked around the room to find that Sweetie Belle was not in the room.

"Now ah' wonder where Sweetie went..."

"Gosh dang it..." I muttered under my breath as paint splashed all over my fur. "This is going to take a long time to get off." I groaned as I kept painting. With my full magic concentration on the paintbrush, I carefully placed the tip on the surface, and--

"Hiya Sweetie Belle!" called out a familiar voice.

"Gah!" startled by her calling, I dropped the paintbrush in the paint bucket which made a huge splash, making even more stains on my fur. "Oh come on!"

"Heh, sorry." Applebloom apologized as she smirked. "So, watcha doin' paintin' Scootaloo's scooter?"

"I'm giving it an artistic touch! What do you think?" Sweetie Belle said as she unveiled the work-in-progress scooter paintjob. The scooter, from its blue color, turned orange with purple flaming streaks, and Scootaloo's cutie mark as an emblem in the front of the scooter.

"Wow!" she exclaimed. "Sweetie Belle! You could've done this instead of giving Scoots that book!"

"Well, what can I say? I work better under pressure?" I bragged.

"I reckon' we should show it to Scootaloo! Ah' think she's still studyin' on that book ya' gave her... To be honest, ah'm kinda' worried about her."

"Well, same here Applebloom. I'm also doing this as an apology gift. She nearly fell off the clouds! Could you believe that?" I said out loud. "I'm just glad she's not hurt."

Sleeping without dreams again, eh?

That's a good thing if you're a man who needs to wake up very early. First thing you need to do in the morning is eat breakfast. Second thing is help your sister. Third is get the fuck to work. I've got no time for dreams... The only dream I care about is making Carrie's dream come true.

I yawned and got myself up and started hazily walking towards the door.

Heh, that's funny. I don't remember having doors taller than me.

"OW!" I stepped on something sharp. "Ah shit! It wasn't a dream! I'm still a fucking horse!"

My hoof was bleeding, a shard of broken glass was on my left hoof.

"Ah, ah, fuck... I fucking hate glass." using my magical right hoof power, I levitated the glass shard out of my hoof. No matter how painful, I just needed to get that shit out. Pulling it slowly, the pain ever-so-slightly becoming sharper by the minute, I whimpered. I'm a fucking pussy when it comes to getting stabbed...

Finally, I got the shard completely off my hoof. Now all I need is to get out of here, get bandages to stop the bleeding, and get out of this world!

I slammed the door outwards and I quickly ran down the wooden slope, keeping my left hoof off of the ground. I then ran on a dirt path, hoping it'd lead me somewhere. Two figures then started coming to view. It's those two again...

"S-Scootaloo?!" Sweetie Belle said, looking worried. "What happened?"

I stopped on my tracks, turned around and looked at them. "N-nothing's wrong!" I stuttered. "And I'm not Scootaloo!"

"Scootaloo! Are you bleeding?!" Applebloom shouted.

Sweetie Belle's ears drooped down. I heard a quiet 'oh no' from her.

"Yeah, so what if I am bleeding?" I growled at her. "I don't need your help. I just need bandages."

Applebloom, looking smug, raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Well, good luck with that."

"Applebloo-!" Sweetie Belle tried to object, but was quickly cut off by a yellow hoof blocking her mouth.

"Go ahead, Scoots. We won't bother ya' no more."

"Are you trying to do reverse psychology on me? Well, let me tell ya', it ain't gonna work!" I yelled.

Applebloom raised both eyebrows, and smirked. "Does it hurt?"

"Does what hurt?"

"This." Applebloom said as she got some yellow liquid from... somewhere? And quickly splashed it on my wound. It stung like hell!

"Agh, fuck!"

"Hold still, Scootaloo!" Applebloom said as she untied the bow from her mane and quickly turned it into a makeshift bandage and wrapped it around my hoof. "There... Good thing I brewed up alcoholic cider during my potion practice."

"FUCK!" still wincing from the pain.

"You made alcoholic cider! Applebloom, you're just a filly!" Sweetie Belle said, looking shocked.

"Relax, Sweetie Belle. Have you ever seen me be a lazy drunkard, spoutin' out lisps minute by minute? I use this alcoholic cider as an example. And thank Celestia I still had a batch. Alcohol's a good disinfectant."

"I guess you're right."

"AAAAAA!!"

Chapter 4: Fight?

I was at Craig's home. It wasn't anything fancy, but comparing his home to my brother's apartment was like comparing a mansion to a cardboard box. Craig grabbed a remote and turned on the television. The television was big, but not gigantic like the ones in the nearby shop. He turned something on below the TV. It was a video game console! I've never seen one. Shaun said something about owning one before the whole incident with dad. After that, he sold everything he ever had.

I sighed at the thought of Shaun again. Craig seemed to have noticed my expressions as he perked his head a bit from behind the television.

"Hm?"

"Oh, it's nothing." I lied as I sat down on the couch. Craig might not be the smartest academic-wise, but he can tell a person if they're lying or not from a mile away.

"I know you're upset and all, but you gotta hope for the best. He's hooked up to the tubes. The only thing left to do is hope."

He was right. I just have to focus in the now and hope for the best. Craig finally finished setting up the console and the TV flashed an array of colors and words on screen. He then nudged me with what seems to be a controller.

"Yo, wanna play a game to take your mind off of things? It helps me a lot whenever I'm feeling down." said Craig as he handed me one.

"Thanks, Craig."

"Eh, don't mention it. Mat Hoffman's Pro BMX 2 was basically Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, but with bikes instead of boards."

"You really like biking, don't you?"

"I mean, your brother was great at it! He sort of inspired me. Hey, if you think you're the only one that's hoping for your brother to get better then think again." he said chuckling. "You're not alone. And I hope he isn't too."

"FUCK! Leave me alone!" I hissed out as I was being forcefully put on one of those wagons those kids back in the playground at home play with. It was attached to what seems to be a scooter. It had a pretty cool paintjob from what I can tell.

"Applebloom, are you sure you know how to ride a scooter?" said Sweetie Belle as she sat beside me on the wagon.

"Eeyup. Ah've been doing a lot of things while Scootaloo was off busy practicin' with her books and what not." says Applebloom as she grabs on the handlebars of the Scooter.

"Where the fuck are you taking me?" I asked angrily.

"Could ya' stop saying fuck fer', like, a secon'?"

"Applebloom, what does fuck mean?" asked Sweetie Belle.

"It's a bad wo--"

"It's a password for free ice cream. I prefer you say it in front of an adult." I quickly cut off Applebloom.

"Oh, I see." Sweetie Belle then inhaled a lot of air, and then shouted. "FUCK!"

The shout echoed.

"I really hope the sleepover they're having was a fun one." giggled Rarity as she was happily sowing another commissioned gown.

"Ya sure?" Rainbow Dash said, with a worried tone in her voice. "Scootaloo almost killed herself by accident by hurling herself off a cloud."

"Well, she isn't dead, that's for sure, and that's what matters." said Rarity. "As far as I know, all of them are having harmless fun at the Applefarm. Probably playing around the barn animals..." Rarity shuddered at the thought of being near barn animals. "Nonetheless, they're safe in Applejack's hooves. It's not like being at the Apple farm could be a bad influence on her."

"FUCK!"

Rainbow Dash, confused, spoke up. "That sounded like Swee-"

"APPLEJACK, I WILL DESTROY YOU!"

Applebloom looked at me with murderous intent. She then rolled her eyes and began to scoot. I dunno what scooter terminologies are. Never rode one. Was more of a bike guy myself.

"We're takin' ya' to the hospital to get that darn'd noggin' of yers' checked. Yer' clearly not actin' alright!" Applebloom yelled.

"I'm absolutely fine, darling. Nothing is wrong with the organ which is located in my cranium." I mocked. Applebloom wasn't having any of my shit at the moment. Sweetie Belle seemed to be looking at me with a worried face. "Why are you staring at me, dear?"

"Yep, noggin' problem." said Sweetie Belle, with the worried tone matching her face at the moment.

"Eeyup."

So we rode on the path until we finally reached the hospital. We all got off the wagon, in front of the entrance.

"Here, 'Scootaloo'." Applebloom said, "Yer' here in the Hospital. We'll leave ya' here. Don't do anythin' stupid."

"Oh why, 2+2=4. I ain't so stupid after all. Should be enough for a farm pony to understand."

"Alright that's it, Ah've had enough of yer' shit." Applebloom nearly brought out a hoof at me until, using my magic, have made a forcefield around me. The hoof rebounded and Applebloom staggered. "Grr!"

"You think you can fight me? I've got magic, bitch!"

"Oh yeah? Ah've got..." she pondered for a bit. "Well, fuck ya' too!" Applebloom yelled out.

"Didn't take you for a potty mouth, Applebloom." she said as she took another swing, which I used the power of magic to dodge and punch her in the face.

"Yeah, well Ah never took ya' for one either!" she yelled as he did a Karate kick that actually got me in the face.

"Fuck!" I stumbled on the grass. Using magic to pick myself up, I quickly managed to prepare myself. I saw that she was charging right at me. "Charging at me? I'll be glad to charge in too."

"Yer' a smug piece a' shit!" Applebloom yelled out of anger.

"Look who's talkin', piece of shit!"

We were about to exchange hoofs to the face in that charge attack until...

"STOP! All of you." we were then stuck in place, like pressing pause on a DVD player. Our hoofs an inch apart to our faces. It was Sweetie Belle doing some magic, and she definitely did not look happy. "Would you think about all this. All you're doing is hurting yourselves even more!"

She turned to the both of us, glaring. "Yes, I know that Scootaloo is a bit loose in the head right now, but she's still our friend. Applebloom, she's our friend. And as far as I'm concerned, friends don't fight each other... So please. Don't?"

"You know, she makes a compelling point. Truce?" I said.

"Maybe." Sweetie glared at Applebloom. "Alright alright. Fine."

We were then released from the magic pause button. We quickly stopped our exchange of hoofs to the face. Hoping that things would be less complicated, Applebloom then turned to me, with her eyes like knives staring down at my soul. "Ah know y'ain't the real Scootaloo."

"Oh thank God! That's what I've been trying to tell you!"

"Wait, really?" Applebloom raised an eyebrow.

"Holy fuck, you really are a farm po-" then suddenly my mouth stopped producing sound. My mouth was gone! I saw Sweetie Belle's horn glowing.

"No more trash talk. We're friends here, right?"

I nodded, in hopes of getting my mouth back.

"Good." she then released me from her magic grasp. "Now let's go to the hospital and get your hoof treated."

"I guess..."

Chapter 5: Rest?

The trip to the hospital was... shitty. To say the least. I mean I bruised Applebloom a lot with my punches, and I had to use my bad hoof for that. So blood was everywhere. Yeah, that'd make an edgelord's dream come true. Long story short, got my hoof bandaged, Applebloom has an icepack, Sweetie Belle looks disturbed and disgruntled, and we went back to the treehouse via scooter wagon.

I pondered a bit during the trip.

'Why?'.

Yes, why indeed. Why the fuck am I here? Is it because my life's a shithole and throwing me into this colorful land of pastel colored ponies would make me happy? I gotta get back to my world. The world that's real. The world that's cruel. The world that has Carrie. That's the world I know...

I sighed as the scooter had stopped in front of the treehouse. We saw three figures come up. One was orange with a Stetson, and the other was a white and fancy looking one. Between those two was Rainbow Dash. All with worried looks on their faces.

Must be the bloody mess I made.

"By Celestia's name, where have you been!" said the fancy looking one. "And Sweetie Belle, you have lots of explaining to do with your usage of swear words!"

"Alright, what in Tartarus happened in the treehouse! Ah' nearly thought there'd been a murder about in the treehouse!" the orange one said.

"Okay, Scoots, why're you bandaged?"

"And WHY is mah lil' sister bruised up!?"

"Ehem..." with strong confidence, I cleared my throat. A man who works with fishy business must master the art of fishiness... Also known as... Just fucking lie, but do it good.

"So, we were doing some magic from the magic book I did. And it accidentally malfunctioned and hit Applebloom. I bled, but don't worry. Applebloom took me to the hospital because she's such a good friend."

I saw Applebloom grin. What's she happy about?

"Yer' lyin'." the orange mare said, not looking so happy.

"No I'm not. Where's your proof?" I contested and grinned. She couldn't possibly have any evidence to show I beat Applebloom senseless.

"Mail arrived in mah barn. Hospital bill, and a letter of concern regarding fillies fighting."

My grin faded into a frown. In a blink of an eye, I was tied by a thick rope. I thought to myself 'Is this the rope I'll use to finally hang myself? Because please, this is getting too fucking weird'.

"NOW LISSEN' HERE, MISSY!" The orange mare shouted in my face. "I don't wan' yer' punchin' hooves anywhere near my Applebloom!"

She was fuming with rage, her face piping hot red. Jeez, that is one-hundred percent genuine anger.

"Well, ain't my fault my that she's an annoying ass." I said smugly, wriggling in this knot she got me tied in. Applejack, with no hesitation, bit the rope and swung it around in a circular motion. I flew around this extremely fast amusement park ride until she eventually stopped. "Okay..." I closed my eyes, trying to keep all the chunks in my stomach from hurling out of me. If I could raise a hoof to cover my mouth, I would, but this rope's making it a bit difficult for me to do that. "That was uncalled for."

"Applejack!" Rainbow Dash shouted at her. "She's just a kid! Kids fight a lot! It's to be expected when all of them are going through puberty!"

"Really now, Rainbow Dash? Ah've never fought anyone as a filly! Maybe it's cus Ah didn't have parental issues!"

"Oh you had to go that far? Well, Applejack, at least my parents are still alive!"

"How dare ya' talk about ma an' pa that way!"

"Oh man, where's the popcorn!" I exclaimed as I watched the fight begin. The fancy one was looking quite worried as she was about to use her horn until--

"ENOUGH!" Sweetie Belle said as she froze everyone in place. The fancy one was shocked at the sight of her little sister. "I've had enough of all this nonsense. All of you... I expected better from you, Applejack. Element of Honesty? I can see you're also brutally honest as well. Please, behave yourselves."

Everyone was unfrozen, except for me... well, not that there's anything to do while I'm still tied up here. I saw that Applejack and Rainbow Dash shook hooves and hugged. I heard them mutter their apologies. The fancy one joined in on the group hug. I mentally sigh in disappointment that I didn't get to watch a fight. I was pretty interested in MMA shows when they were on television. I imagine it would've probably been a hundred times better with horses.

Going back, Sweetie Belle then turned to me, her eyes looking at me with such disappointment. "You're like an anomaly in friendships here, Scootaloo. I don't know how, but you have quite the ability to ruin ponies friendships." with that, she unfroze me... I'm still fucking bound to the rope!

"Well, I don't give a fuck about friends. Y'all are bunch of horses." I said annoyingly. "And yes, I am an anomaly. I'm not even supposed to be here."

Applebloom raised an eyebrow. "You mentioned that earlier, but I just thought yer' fuckin' around."

"Applebloom!" both the orange mare and the fancy one said in shock.

"What's yer' real name?" she said to me, putting a hoof for a shake.

"I'm gonna mention my real name once I'm unbound and shit." Applebloom looked at me and shrugged. She untied the lasso and now I'm free. I grinned at my new found freedom. "My name is... Sayo."

"Sayo?" Applebloom asked, raising an eyebrow. "That's yer' name?"

"Yeah... Sayo Nara assholes!" I said as I tried running away from these crazy ponies... until I realized I was frozen again. I saw Sweetie Belle appear in front of me. "Umm, yeah. Fine... My real name is Tom Cruise."

"You are a foal, whoever you are." said Sweetie Belle, looking unimpressed with my actions. "Tell us who you really are, or I'll be using a new method on you."

"Eh, how bad could it be?" I said as I hocked a spit at her face. She quickly used magic to deflect the spit back at my face. "Ah fuck." I flinched. "Ya ain't gettin' anything from me ya horses! No matter what magic spell you got!"

"Applebloom, hand me the cider." she said as she used magic to unravel my bandaged hoof.

"Okay, stop right there."

"You are going to tell me who you really are. Are you a displaced creature? A changeling? A soul trapped in another world? What are you?" she asked, her eyes piercing mine. "Answer truthfully or I'm going to stab glass back in your hoof and pour cider back into it."

"Sweetie Belle! What in Celestia are you planning?!" the fancy one exclaimed as she tried running towards her until she stopped dead in her tracks... it's that freeze spell again. Rainbow Dash and Applejack tried to also check what was happening, but the same spell was cast unto them too.

I'm a fucking pussy when it comes to getting stabbed.

"Alright alright!" I yell out. "I'll tell you!"

Chapter 6: Secrets?

Out of all people, it had to be me...

"Um... I-I don't even know where to start with you. I mean, do you even know who you're talkin' to?"

"No. We don't." the five pony audience replied to my statement.

I smirked and asked again. " D-Do you have any idea, any idea who I am?"

"We just said NO!"

"Well, basically... I'm kind of a big deal!"

"Now wait jus' a darn' tootin' minute ya' dumbass." Applebloom interrupted. "Enough with yer' gosh darn' vidya game references or ah'll really get the cider in!"

"Alright! Jeez..." I gestured to Applebloom about how much I DON'T want to do that. I then continued on with my introduction. "My name is Shaun. Was about 21 years old. Human. Lived on Earth. Blue planet with green stuff. Ever heard of it? No? Yeah. Anyways, I have a little sister back home and she was the only thing that kept me going in life. Until the very day I got hit by a fucking truck during work, everything lost meaning to me. Yeah, magic is cool and all, but it the magic ain't gonna make me see my little sister again, why bother."

Sweetie Belle and Applebloom were perplexed about the words I just blurted out. Rainbow Dash was just staring with worried eyes while Applejack and Rarity were just exchanging glances at each other; seems like those two were having a lot of trouble believing in what I was saying.

Applebloom slowly walked up to me and stared me straight in the eye.

"What is it buckaroo, any more cider to pour in my wo-" I was cut off short as Applebloom punched me in the face. "-OW!" I yelped in pain as I stared back at her.

"You're lying!" Applebloom started to tear up as she readied another punch. "You're fucking lying!" her Southern accent was gone, and was replaced with, from what I can hear, a more East coast accent.

I braced for the next punch, but Applejack held her back. "Applebloom! What's a matter with you?!"

"You don't understand!" she yelled. "Earth shouldn't possibly exist! This is a new world! New life for me to live!"

"A-applebloom?" Sweetie Belle stuttered as she tried to approach her.

"If you're in for an introduction, then let me tell you mine..."

In life, there are times you don’t get your fair share of the world’s big apple pie. Some times, that's just the way the world works. What I don't like, however, is when people are stealing slices from each other. The evidence of human strife really fascinates me, and at the same time, horrifies me.

My name is Eric Winston. I’m 32 years old. I am a chemistry teacher to a broke-back public school. It's a mundane job, but it pays well. I live in my parent's home, bless their souls. Thanks to them, this land is fully paid and I don't need to worry about paying loans and stuff. All I need to pay are taxes, food, and myself... Yes, I'm single. Probably because I play video games when I'm not studying, making lectures, and organizing student files. Life’s been like this for years now, and I'm happy with what I got. I'm friends with the other faculty members, and I'm glad that a lot of students actually look up to me... And when I mean 'a lot', I actually mean around four or five... I'm the teacher that most students would throw paper airplanes at...

"Yeah, I'd like two piece pancakes and orange juice..." I said to the cellphone. "Oh, and don't forget the apple pie... Yes... Thank you."

I closed the phone down and put it back into my pocket. I was sitting in the faculty room, organizing my papers early in the morning. I sighed and looked down on some of the papers. Only a few students were failing my class, but I see that they're trying very hard to pass. I'm surprised that, for a private school, the people that most would consider 'ruffians' are surprisingly polite when it comes to the teachers... I inspected my papers again and saw that class 9-D didn't have their papers submitted. I sighed in annoyance towards my forgetfulness. I wrote down a note hoping people could pay the delivery guy once he gets here. I pasted it on my cubicle and got up.

“Another day…” I muttered to myself. “Another lecture.”

I hummed as I opened the door out the faculty room. The first thing I saw outside the faculty were the familiar line of windows paneled across the long hallway. Nothing out of the ordinary... yet. All the students were starting to gather around the front of the school, all looking worried and shocked. Some were starting to shout and scream. I thought to myself "This couldn't be some student protest, is it?"

All were looking up, saying something like "Don't do it!". A shiver went to my spine like an electric shock. From there, I dashed towards the stairs headed to the school roof. I keep whispering to myself "Please tell me I'm not too late." over and over, in efforts that I could calm down a bit.

The orange sky of the sunrise filled my world as I saw a young girl, around the age of fourteen, standing on the edge of the fourth floor. I didn't have enough time to think, I needed to get her back safely.

She then started to tip over the edge.

With every footstep felt like a loud echo in my mind as I ran towards the girl. "God no, God no, God no!"

She then started to fall over, but just in time I grabbed her by the elbow.

"Oh God, please, God, please!!" the girl shook her head and then looked down. She then looked back at me with eyes of regret.

"Mr. Winston! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't want to involve you in this!" she then started to cry.

"Now is not the time for tears, Ms. Olfermire!" I then tried to pull her up, but I wasn't strong enough. I had to use my entire abdomen in order to pull her up and the edge as the fulcrum for my body. It was a success that I had brought her up. She had her hands grabbed on to the concrete edge... but she was unintentionally pulling me down.

"Just a few more!" I yelled out as I saw her pull herself up, with my hand still on her wrist. She then pulled herself up and got on to the roof safely... but I wasn't so unfortunate.

My abdomen slipped and I started to fall face forward.

I heard everyone gasp. People were starting to scream.

And within a few seconds... Silence.

"Hello? Looks like I'm a bit late..." said a teacher. "Nobody's here! Welp, looks like nobody would mind if I... snoop around!"

The teacher enthusiastically snooped around with a bunch of the other teacher's cubicles. She didn't have any ill intention behind it, she just did it for fun. She went to Eric's cubicle and saw a sticky note saying "If you're reading this and I'm not here... please pay for the McDonalds that I ordered. I just needed to head to class 9-D. I seemed to have forgotten the test papers there. Whoever paid, I promise I'll buy you a latte. I swear it!" and a smiley face drawn on the end.

"Heh, oh Eric. You're such a cutie."

"Oh God, please, God, please!!"

"You know, I always kind of had a crush on you... Yeah, being single for more than 20 years can do that to you. Being 34 years old. Yeah."

"Mr. Winston! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

"Maybe I should confess... today? Nah... Maybe tomorrow. I'll have a next chance tomorrow, right?"

"Just a few more!"

She then heard a knock at the door. She went up to it and opened the door to see a man in McDonald's employee uniform. "Two piece pancakes, and orange juice... Oh! And the apple pie, ma'am."

"Aaaaaaagh!" a loud scream caught the attention of both the delivery man and the teacher. They quickly ran towards one of the many windows which had the view of the courtyard.

As the figure fell down from the fifth, to the fourth, to the third, that was when Sarah's dreams had shattered.

"Eric!" she yelled out as she finally had processed what she was seeing.

"Oh my God..." the delivery man muttered under his breath. "Fuck it, the stuff's free ma'am." he left the take out bag and put it beside Sarah. "I don't want to be anywhere near dead people..." he quickly went out of the school, as Sarah watched in horror as he finally fell to the first floor.

Chapter 8: Corpse?

Walking, walking, and, you guessed it, more walking! This forest is as dense as the skulls of those delinquents I had to deal with. Probably not as dense, but it’s getting there!

The flower petals seemed to be increasing in amount the more I get nearer to wherever this trail was taking me. The amount of flowers started to look like piles of leaves raked in during autumn. That’s when I noticed something; a smell. The smell was quite peculiar, but as I kept walking it became much more evident as to what it is. It reeks. It smelled rancid. If I had anything to say about it, it would be just like that one untimely experience I had with a Raflessia arnoldii, a corpse flower. The putrid smell of rotting flesh was starting to become evident as I walked along flower petal trail.

Through the bushes, my eyes widened as I finally saw the source of the stench; the corpse flower, but not just any corpse flower but a humongous one! I'd estimate the base of the flower being 3 ft tall and the petals span from the center with a radius of 6 ft long. The flower petal trail seemed to stop dead there at the corpse flower. It was as larger than the one I saw from the trip I organized going to Indonesia. Darn. I should've been a Biology teacher instead. Nevertheless, I shrugged those thoughts, and approached the corpse flower. I covered my nose with my hoof (God, I gotta get used to saying that word instead of hand). I then noticed something strange. Inside of the rafflesia's hole was another horse just like me. It was wearing the same bow as me, had the same mark as me, the same hair, everything. The only difference is that this one wasn't breathing. Dead. Unlike mine, its coat was of a faded yellow; like a dead person's skin beginning to grow a pale color.

Was this symbolism? No matter. I didn't want anyone to die without a proper burial, and a stinky flower ain't going to be one. With two of my hooves, I attempted to grab the body only to find myself quickly being blinded by a light as I touched it.

"Every single memory just flashed by me so quickly, yet I remembered everything." Applebloom said as she paced back and forth, explaining her story. "After a while, I then understood now. My purpose here. My life is done on Earth. I left it at that. I pretended that it doesn't exist. Gone. Poof."

"Applebloom, Jesus Christ, man. That's legitimately fuckin' dark." I commented.

"Not really. I've read a bit of philosophy and how I applied it to most of my mistakes in my life." Applebloom replied.

Applejack then came up to the conversation, with a confused and scared look on her face. "So, yer' tellin' me ya' ain't my sister?"

Applebloom cleared her throat first before she said anything. "Eenope. Ah' am yer' sister Applejack. It's jus' that apparently Applebloom died an' wus given a second chance through me. Ah' basically became her." Applebloom quickly hugged Applejack. "Ah' jus' didn't want her to die, in a smelly flower of all places. She had all the things Ah' wished for, an' fer all that to go to waste is just... saddening."

"Flower anomaly..." Sweetie Belle muttered under her breath.

"What was what, Sweets?" Applebloom said as she was still being hugged, burrowed in Applejack's chest.

"A FLOWER ANOMALY!" Sweetie Belle's voice cracked as she squeaked. "It's impossible. Three different anomalies all at once? This can't be possible, this can't possibly be possible!"

"Sweetie Belle, what on Equestria are you talking about!?"

"If an introduction is what all of you are looking for, then let me explain!" Sweetie Belle exclaimed as the area around us illuminated with flashing images. These images then started to slow down a bit, revealing a first-person perspective of what seems to be Sweetie Belle's memories... or so I fuckin' thought.

Sipping tea from her usual day-off from her studies, Evergreen the Unknown was quietly looking out the castle balcony. This castle was hers and nopony else's. Nopony was around to even enter in the first place. Nevertheless, she appreciated the isolation. For the most part. Her studies usually focused on magic and how to allow anypony, not just unicorns, to be able to use magic. "Magic of the Underpony" she called it. She was developing this new theory about obtaining one's magical balance in order to make up for their disabilities. She was doing this for a dear friend who was suffering from losing both hind legs during the Attack of the Smooze; a creature to be described as a slime-like Tartarus-spawn.

Setting her teacup down, she left the castle balcony to go back to her studies until... the princess has returned.

"So, I see you've made yourself at home." The celestial alicorn in front of Evergreen said. "I'm glad you found my old castle to be of use, Evergreen."

She rolled her eyes, and chuckled. "Surprised to see you still cared."

"Evergreen, I've come to discuss important matters."

"Like what? More research to weaponize magic?" She replied, with a brash tone, distaste evident in her voice. The room went quiet for a few seconds. The tall alicorn cleared her throat before she could speak.

"Please, Evergreen. Hear me." the alicorn pleaded. "I've received a message from my future self, and it is of utmost importance."

Evergreen raised her eyebrow. She was interested, yet was prepared to decline another request for her research to be about weaponizing magic.

"I need you to go to the future and identify the four anomalies and fix them as fast as you can."

"Four... ANOMALIES?!" she yelled out. "Impossible, truly impossible! Four? That is truly impossible! Let alone three anomalies! That's impossible!"

"Yes, yes. I do know that four anomalies would mean the end of Equestria. This is why I am asking for your help. You're the only unicorn knowledgeable of these things. My mentor had recently sacrificed himself in sealing the Shadow Pony, so I'm afraid that you're the only one that can save Equestria at the moment."

"Me? A saviour of Equestria?" Evergreen chuckled. "I've developed the advancements of the magic beams for your war. To allow other unicorns to destroy themselves with. Haven't I done enough "saving", Princess Celestia?"

Celestia bowed her head in shame, knowing that it is true that wars among her own ponies have been happening. She just wanted to protect the citizens of Canterlot from invading countries; to dethrone her. What could she do? She knows that those ponies in those countries were her little ponies too, yet these ponies kept harming each other... as if the Elements of Harmony were for naught.

"I see..." Celestia turned around and was about to walk away until Evergreen caught her attention.

"Don't want to have a tea and discuss about it?" Evergreen smirked, floating two teacups in a green aura. Celestia turned around, smiling at her.

"Oh you..."

Chapter 9: Anomalies I

Anomaly 1: Spirit-Transfer

I paced around the clouds, practicing these spells. I learned the ability of basic telekinesis. It wasn't as strong as Twilight's but the fact I was able to do something like this made me grin. I was definitely compensating something for my lack of flight.

Thank you, Sweetie Belle... even though giving me this book was kind of an insult to my inability to fly. Eh, at least I can use magic now.

At this point, I've read the book from cover to back now. The only spell I know how to do is telekinesis. All the other spells require some kind of extra power that, according to this book, requires an extra spirit. There's a spirit summoning spell in this book... Jeez, Sweetie Belle, did you get this book off of Twilight's or some abandoned cabin in the woods notorious for demons.

Eh whatever. What could possibly happen if I were to summon a spirit right now?

With a wave of my hoof, I used my magic to flip the page. I could've used my hoof there, but using magic was making squee. I loved it! Nevertheless, I started chanting the words written on the book.

"Corporis puto secundum Spiritum." with a flash, I heard numerous loud sounds. It startled me! Making me nearly fall off my cloud! Good thing I got Rainbow Dash to watch over me.

"Hey Twilight! I thought we were gonna go dragon watching today!?"

"It doesn't say that on my checklist... and dragon watching isn't until next Thursday." the studious lavender alicorn said as she flipped through her lists.

"Awww, that sucks."

As Twilight flipped through her notes, she then noticed something in her checklist for today. "Heyyy, shouldn't you be watching over Scootaloo? You told me to write it down here in case you forgot... turns out you did."

"OH CRUD!" in a flash, Rainbow Dash was reduced to a blur. Twilight giggled as she checked that one off the list.

Flashing, sounds of ponies talking... or what I assumed to be ponies talking, and strong winds. I covered my face from the strong winds and kept my stance on the cloud. An image began to form in front of me. It nearly made me cringe at the look. It was of a mangled body of a... whatever it was. Was it still alive? I looked closely only to jump back in fright as it writhed in agony.

“Carrie Turner! Thank you for everything you’ve done!” I heard the... thing say as its head then dropped to the ground with a thud. Then in a flash, my body felt weak... I then read the subtext below the spell.

'Do not use under any circumstance. You have been warned.'

"Ah horseapples." I then coughed as I passed out on the cloud.

Anomaly 2: Flower Anomaly

"Gee, Twilight's recipes fer a growth serum were pretty lame... like come on? Giant's nail clippings? Blech..." I said as I tried finding a flower to suit the recipe. I then passed by the poison joke garden. I chuckled to myself, reminding myself of the time my sister and her friends got affected by it when they didn't listen to Zecora. I then reread the list and looked at the text below the flower ingredient. "Huh... "can be any flower". Well, ah'll be! Time to use mah noggin for IMAGINATION!"

With a careful move of the hoof, I picked a poison joke as delicately as possible. Then, I tried finding a plant that would look funny when supersized. After a few steps, I went up to the first weird looking flower I could find.

"Ah, pee you, what in tarnation is that smell?" I gagged at the smell of rotting oats. I then saw this flower. "Woah, are ya' causin' all this smell, lil' guy?"

Applebloom giggled a bit as she thought it'd be funny if making this flower grow big would be a good source of pranks. She then went to work with her portable alchemy kit. Carefully handling the poison joke, she used an essence extractor and poured the poison joke's blue essence in a beaker. She then brought out the giant's clippings, a spotted mushroom, dragon's tooth (thanks, Spike), and a serpent's tear. With a mortar and pestle, she ground them all to a fine powder and poured it inside the beaker. The liquid, at first, reacted violently to the powder but it then simmered down as it became an orange colored liquid.

Now, for the moment of truth, I poured the concoction all over the plant...

I felt a powerful explosion against my body.

It all happened so fast that I didn't even know what happened. I couldn't feel anything. My entire body felt charred. My brain was the only thing conscious at the moment. I could still see what was happening, yet my body couldn't move. It was either out of the force that pushed me was enough to break my forelegs and hindlegs, or something else. Either way, I felt like I've made a horrible mistake.

I saw that flower. My potion worked, that's a plus, but it also looked alive. It was crawling towards me.

Crap crap crap... Is it gonna eat me? Oh Celestia, no no no...

It grew a vine from its base and it started to approach me. It then wrapped around me, lifted me, and placed me inside its hole in the centre of all the petals. As I was placed inside, the petals begin to wrap up, enclosing me.

I guess this is the end of me...

Suddenly, I heard a voice. "You are going to die... I don't want that." it echoed inside. "You gave me life. Out of all the plants, you gave me life. I appreciate that. I am a plant that copies anything that enters my centre. It gives me nutrients, while not harming the ecosystem surrounding the Everfree forest."

"Well... that's comforting." I coughed.

"However, the copies I make are of non-sentient beings. Usually flies, insects, and other things. I've swallowed a few Breezys and they just ended up as fresh corpses, and I felt sorry."

"Sweet Celestia!"

"No fear... I'm a sentient flower. All flowers have a connection with the spirit of the flowers; however, only sentient flowers can summon. She has magic strong enough to give the copy a soul.

"Well, make sure it's mine..." I coughed before the feeling of my brain.

"Rest now, little one."

"Another sentient flower?!" a sunflower had exclaimed, raising both its vines and flailing them about. "Impossible m'lady! Only a select number of sentient flowers can exist."

The flower spirit nodded. "Tis' an anomaly. Having more sentient flowers could deal damage to our kind, especially that it is within proximity of Ponyville. We can't risk ourselves being discovered. However, it is a cry of help."

"What if it is a trap?" a rose had queried. "What if those ponies purposefully made their own sentient flower to capture you? You did mention that it could deal damage to our kind, so how much are you willing to take this risk?"

"I don't know. I'll make at haste nonetheless just to see who is sending me this message of help."

"B-b-but?!"

"I'll be fine Rosas. I'll be back sooner than you can say Springtime!"

With a flap of her wings, she then made haste to the Everfree.

Chapter 7: Bloom?

"I'm satisfied with my life."

This thought echoed in my mind as my body fell from the fifth floor.

At this point, I'm pretty sure there's no surviving this. Every second felt like hours as the pavement approached my face.

Fucking hell... I didn't even get a chance at love, not even leaving an offspring to continue the Winston bloodline. It's gonna be one of the biggest regrets once I see my parents again, up there in the sky.

I closed my eyes one final time before I braced for the impact of cold concrete.

"Hiya sir!" said a cheery girl to me as I just left 8-C. She had freckles on her cheeks, and a hair of reddish brown, similar to earthen clay. She wore glasses that seem to have been snapped at one point for it had been attached together with some masking tape. Her overall appearance tells me she's a bit irresponsible in taking care of her self. However, her bona fide smile shone as bright as innocence itself. "Howsit' hangin'?" she said with a grin.

She was being awfully a bit casual to a teacher, a figure of authority in school; however, she was just too polite to tell her off. Instead of being that kind of teacher, I smiled and replied. "Oh, same old. Just about to go eat lunch." I said as I gestured my hand over to my sling bag filled with some food. "You should too, you know."

She giggled. "Well, I wouuuld, but I don't got any!"

"Oh Jesus." I replied to her. "Don't your parents give you any lunch money?"

"Dad can't afford any." she said. "But I don't need that! Mark Twain said 'he could live days from a compliment'!"

"Well, that's actually a figure of speech. Ask Ms. Sarah on that. I'm more on the chemistry side... you know, the subject everyone finds boring?"

"Yeah, that's true."

This girl's honesty is too much for me. "Well, I best be eating my lunch in the Faculty Room. I need some energy to get me going through the day!"

"If you say so sir!" she said cheerfully, her warm aura never faltering. "Before I go, I want to give you this!"

She said as she gave me what seems to be a vinyl sticker of what seems to be a cartoon pony of some sorts. "Uhh...?" I was confused at her gift. I was going to politely give it back to her, but then I looked back at her face and --seriously! Those goddamn eyes of her were tugging at my heartstrings!

"Who is this?"

"It's Applebloom!"

Chemistry is as hard as what my students think it is.

10... 9... 8...

I mean, sure enough that the entire reason why I took up this job is because I want to make it easier for these students to understand.

7... 6... 5...

They're our future. Sadly, looks like I won't be seeing that future anytime soon.

4... 3...

However...

2...

Hopefully, from my twelve years of teaching... I've been able to make an impact in their lives.

1...

Let's see what the afterlife has in store for me.

Bloom...

The first word that entered my head was the word "Bloom".

Reminds me of that time I tasked an entire class to do a science experiment with flowers once. That didn't end all too well.

Heh. Funny. I actually like flowers a whole lot more than Chemistry, but I'm that kind of guy who likes a job that doesn't sound too... you know... lame-sounding? Don't get me wrong, working at a floral shop sounds very relaxing, but working as a Chemistry teacher sounds less boring... wait... they both sound boring now that I think about it.

Damn it...

Huh. Is this what death feels like? Just floating around in nothing? That's a thought I feared a lot. Just wandering around in nothingness for an indefinite period of time sounds like suffering. Hopefully it wouldn't be like this for long. It's like waiting for the creation of the universe; a huge explosion, scattering hydrogen atoms everywhere. That sort of stuff? Yeah...

It was until I felt a sharp pain arising.

Oh God, don't tell me I lived from that, did I? Imagine the medical bill?! Haha! Bah, don't care. As long as I'm alive, I don't care what the pains of reality I will go through!

Yes! I see it! I see the light!

I awoke to see the light of the beautiful sun shine upon me once again. I sighed in relief. The thought of death was terrifying. All cold. I was laying down on what felt to be grass. The place smelled far cleaner and less "polluted with carbon emissions". It's like I've been transported to a whole new world, or something? That, or my hospital is in Canada... speaking of which? Where is the hospital!?

I decided to stand up on my own two feet and check my surroundings, only to stumble down and hit my head on the grass. "Ah, crap..." I muttered to myself as I rubbed the bruise on my head. I attempted to stand on my feet again, only to fall again with the same result. "The fuck?" I said, only now noticing that my voice was more of a child. A female one at that.

"Okay, what seems to be the problem here?" I said as I waved a hoof around... wait, hoof?!

"Agh! What is that!?" I said as I tried to lift up a hand to point at the hoof, only then realizing that I lifted the same hoof instead. I was starting to hyperventilate. This is NOT okay! "I'm a horse, I'm a horse, I'm a little horse, of course!"

I tried to run, but only tripping again afterwards. I fell and skidded across ground, eating dirt in the process. After that commotion, I spat the dirt in my mouth and gagged at the taste. "Jesus... I must be in some sort of hell."

Brushing aside the fact that I AM LITERALLY A HORSE... I should focus on getting to know where the hell I am. Observing my surroundings, I seemed to be in a forest. For whatever reason, it felt... foreboding. However, a trail of red flower petals seemed to start from where I woke up. "Reminds me of one of those romantic sex scenes in movies where they leave rose petals scattered all over the place... heh, funny if a horse like me would get something like that!" I decided I should follow it...

After I learn how to walk.