Chapters Ch. 01; Issues and Introductions
“How much further do you think it is?”
Revan glanced back at Carrot Top, who had an exhausted Diamond Tiara draped across her back, one leg bound in a crude splint, “A few more hours, I think, we’ll rest once we get to the caves. How are you two holding up?” she added, turning to look back at Ditzy and Dinky.
“We can make it,” the gray peagsus replied firmly, wrapping a protective wing around her remaining daughter.
The Jedi only nodded and then turned back as they resume trudging through the forest, ‘We’ve lost Sparkler, Filthy Rich and Minuet, and I haven’t the foggiest idea where we’ll go after the caves, the last word was that Equestria and the Crystal Empire had fallen, and that was weeks ago … No ! We’ll think of something! We’ll survive this!’
A loud thump, that shook the very ground, interrupted her thoughts, and sent the twi’lek spinning around, her lightsaber flaring to life in her hand, to stare up at Tirek.
“Ah, more ponies, excellent,” the centaur rumbled, “And a … hmm … well, whatever you are, you have no magic, so I don’t really care,” with a contemptuous wave he opened his mouth and the ponies screamed and collapsed as the giant sucked away their magic and strength.
Revan gave a despairing cry as she flung out her hand and unleashed a massive bolt of lightning that caused Tirek to flinch and step back, only for the wound to evaporate away, “That actually hurt, little gnat,” he chuckled, “A pity for you that you’ll never do any more than that,” the centaur opened his mouth again, and flames filled the Jedi’s vision.
Revan’s eye shot open to stare blankly into the darkness, as her wife’s faint snores filled their bedroom. Inhaling raggedly, the twi’lek rolled over to snuggle up against the mare and try to forget, at least momentarily, the broken recollections that had been haunting her for the last few months.
Unfortunately, her movements, slight as they were, woke Twilight, who twisted in her arms to face her, “Is everything alright, Revan?” the alicorn asked, blinking drowsily.
Revan bit her lip for a moment and actually considered telling her wife a comforting lie, ‘No, I don’t hide anything from Twi’ anymore.’ “It’s just more memories, pika , I’ll deal with it.”
Seeing Twilight’s worried look, the Jedi laughed silently and gave the mare a kiss on the muzzle, “Really, Twi’, I’ll be okay, I know I’m messed up right now, chaos, I have the memories of seven other versions of me rattling around in my head! But you, me, the younglings and the girls, we’ll get through it like we always do.”
“Yes,” Twilight agreed, wrapping her wings around the twi’lek, after a few minutes of cuddling, the alicorn decided to broach a subject that had been bothering her for a while, “Revan, honey, about Starlight ….”
“… Yes?” her wife’s response was almost a growl.
The alicorn flinched slightly at the sudden hardness in Revan’s voice, but she forged ahead determinedly, “Don’t you think you might be being a bit harsh with her? She didn’t realize what she was doing, and she is trying to be a better pony ….”
“Tell that to all of her victims,” Revan snarled, before she flushed and nuzzled Twilight apologetically, “I’m sorry, Twi’eso , you didn’t deserve that.”
Twilight pulled the twi’lek closer, “I know you have good reasons to be suspicious of Starlight, Revan, but all this antagonism isn’t good for either of you, or for our household. And I think letting go of all this anger your carrying might help you with all of these extra memories.” Laying her head on her wife’s shoulder, she continued quietly, “I don’t want to be a downer right before we go on our vacation, but when we get back, could you think about it, please?”
“Let’s see how Starlight does without you watching over her, and then, maybe, we’ll see.”
Later that morning the entire household gathered in a small hall to see the Royal Family off; Starlight Glimmer was talking with Twilight next to the magic mirror that would send them to the “human world” as Twilight had dubbed it, while Spike joked with the four ponies of Twilight’s guard, and Mission bounced eagerly on her hooves, Smarty Pants clutched in her forelegs, while Frolicking Rhyme and Radiance, the palace’s entire staff, watched the little pegasus filly’s eagerness with amusement.
“Is everyone ready?” Revan asked as she walked in, a suitcase in each hand and a backpack over her shoulders, sparking a round of cheers from the two youngsters.
“Actually, aren’t you forgetting something, dear?” asked the alicorn archly, nodding at the twi’lek’s waist.
“Huh?” the Jedi replied eloquently.
“You’re saber, Revan,” explained Twilight patiently.
“Oh, yeah,” dropping the suitcases, Revan ran a hand over her lekku with a rueful grin while several of the others chuckled and Twilight pulled out a checklist and marked it off, “Let me lock it up and then we can be off, Starlight, a word if you don’t mind?”
The unicorn raised a brow in confusion, but followed the Jedi as she quickly walked back to her bedroom and pulled a battered spacer’s chest from beneath the bed, coding open the lock Revan put her lightsaber inside and re-sealed the chest, before turning to look at her companion. As the moments stretched out, Starlight began to shift uneasily under that silent, one-eyed, appraisal, “I don’t like you, Starlight, and I sure as chaos don’t trust you,” the twi’lek finally said, her bluntness drawing an indignant frown from the mare, “Twilight insists that you’ve turned over a new leaf, but we both know she has an almost pathological need to see the best in others. Her and my other vod all say that you’re trying to be a better pony, a good pony, and that I should let the past go, and both Spike and Missi’ think the world of you, the Force knows why. But the thing is, I’ve seen the legions of ghosts that follow your shadow, I lived through everything that you caused with your little scheme, and that makes it damn hard to forgive, never mind forgetting. Oh, and mind controlling my vod’ika ? Not a good way to get me to think you’ve changed your ways. So, while we’re off on this trip you have a decision to make, who are you going to prove right … them or me ?”
Sunset Shimmer, former personal student of Princess Celestia, former queen bitch of Canterlot High School, and reformed demon, leaned against Applejack’s truck in Canterlot High’s parking lot, the early-spring breeze blowing her hair about and causing the bespectacled girl beside her to shiver slightly. “Here,” she said, draping her leather jacket around the other girl, “Wouldn’t want my little bookworm to catch cold.”
“Thank you, Sunset,” replied Twilight, a shy smile on her lips as she snuggled into the jacket’s warmth.
“Heh, look at ya two, getting’ all lovey-dovey,” Applejack teased from her seat on the truck’s tailgate, “So, what’s this here surprise that tha Princess is bringin’ anyway, Sunset?”
“I guess I can give you girls a hint … she’s bringing some of her family along on this visit.” ‘Let’s see how Sparky and AJ handle it before we spring everything on the others.’
“Really? Who is it?” asked Twilight eagerly, “Oh, oh, is it Shining and Caddy?”
“Simmer down there, Twi’,” laughed the farmgirl, “If’n she tells us everythin’ it won’t be a surprise! Still, now Ah can see why ya wanted ta borrow my truck, what with Fluttershy’s van bein’ in tha shop, an’ all,” she added to Sunset.
Sunset nodded to her friend, before she turned a raised eyebrow on the studious girl beside her, “First you have a minor freak-out over your brother dating Principal Cadance, and now you’re hoping the Princess brings their alternates through?”
“It was a happy freak-out,” protested Twilight defensively, “And besides, we already know that things are not always exactly equivalent between the dimensions, so the Princess’ Caddy and Shining could be engaged or, or, even married !”
Applejack and Sunset exchanged amused head shakes at their friend’s enthusiasm, “So, how are we goin’ ta do this anyway? I mean we got Princess-Twilight an’ Science-Twilight, we can’t be callin’ tha both of ‘em ‘Twi’’ or it’ll get all confusin’, especially for Rainbow Dash.”
“We’ve already thought of that,” Sunset replied, grinning slightly at the farmgirl’s dig at their athletic friend, “For the duration of their visit, Sparky will be ‘Twilight’ and the Princess will go by ‘Twi’'.” The other two girls nodded their understanding, before a flicker on the pedestal of the nearby statue of a rearing horse drew the eyes of all three, a moment later, the pedestal’s side seemed to ripple and two figures stumbled out.
“Hello, girls,” Princess Twilight Sparkle of Equestria greeted her friends, as she put a steadying hand on the shoulder of a little girl with tousled, black-streaked, purple hair who was gawking about in wide-eyed wonder, “It’s good to see you again.”
“Welcome back,” the three teens replied cheerfully, “An’ who’s tha young’un?” Applejack added curiously.
Hearing the distinctive drawl, the little girl spun around and charged the farmgirl with a massive grin and a cry of “Auntie Applejack!” as she threw herself at the teenager in a hug that Pinkie would have been proud of.
Applejack stared bewilderedly at the child happily clinging to her leg, “Say what now?”
Sunset facepalmed, ‘So much for breaking it to them gently ….’
“Eh he he,” Twi’ laughed nervously, a blush spreading across her cheeks, “Applejack, Sunset, Twilight … I’d like you to meet my daughter, Mission.”
“Hi!” Mission waved enthusiastically to the gathered teens, before her eyes narrowed as she looked over Twilight, “Mommy!” she spun about to face her mother, one hand pointed back at the bemused scientist, “Wook! Wook at Miss Twiwight! I towd you that gwasses were neat!”
Sunset and Twilight shared a light giggle at the child’s behavior, while Applejack was busying staring back and forth between the little girl and her mother in slowly growing concern, “Twi’, Sugarcube, is everythin’ a’right? Some varmint didn’t … hurt ya none, did he?”
“What?” the transformed alicorn’s mouth dropped open as she realized what the farmgirl was suggesting, “No! No, nothing like that. Time … flows differently in Equestria, is all. I’m … umh … older than I look here, in this world.”
“Rrreally …” Twilight turned her bespectacled gaze on the flame-haired girl beside her, “So just how old are you anyway, Sunset?”
“Heheohlookatthetimeweshouldtalkaboutthismuch later,” the former unicorn sputtered as she desperately looked around for a distraction, “So, where’s Spike and your other half?”
A second flicker at the statue answered her question as a purple and green dog and black-haired, blue-skinned young woman in her mid-twenties stumbled out. Mission immediately squealed “Spikey’s been turned into a puppy!” as she scooped up the dog and began cuddling him, while Twi’ reached out to steady the older woman.
“Are you alright, honey?”
“That hurt !” the woman groaned, running a hand through her hair, and then feeling her face, “A human, huh? Or near enough, anyway. It could be worse, I guess, I was half expecting that damn mirror to turn me into a horse or something.”
Sunset and Applejack exchanged confused glances as Twilight tore her gaze away from the newcomer’s eyepatch and scared cheek and reached for the pen and pad she always kept with her, “Why would you think that the portal would change you into a horse, Miss?”
“Because magic likes to think it has a sense of humor,” the one-eyed woman replied grumpily as she stretched her back, “It’s mistaken.”
“Oh, stop that,” Twi’ chided her, before turning back to the others, “Girls, this is Revan Vao … my wife.”
Twilight and Applejack both blinked at the princess’ statement, before the farmgirl shrugged and stepped forward, “Well howdy there, Ma’am, it’s right nice ta meet ya.”
“Don’t you ‘Ma’am’ me, AJ,” Revan replied as she shook the offered hand, “I get enough of that from my students.”
“Yeah, because that’s the only way any of them will ever get to see you squirm,” Spike snickered from where he was still cuddled in Mission’s arms.
While all of this had been going on, Twilight had been looking from the princess, to her wife, to their daughter, and back again, “Wait, how does that even work?”
“Magic!” Twi’ quickly answer, cutting off Revan’s reply, before turning to glare at the Jedi, “I’m quite certain that they already know the … mechanics, and we are not having this discussion in front of Mission until she’s much older,” she declared, drawing a disappointed pout from the little girl.
“Fine, Twi’, fine,” Revan yielded, “So … you’re Sunset Shimmer,” the transformed twi’lek added, turning back to the other girls, “I’ve heard about you.”
“You have?”
“Yes. I heard about how you bullied your peers. I heard about how you hurt Celestia. I heard about how you tried to stage a coup with an army of mind-controlled slaves,” Sunset began to sweat under the older woman’s cold, measuring gaze, “I also heard about how you accepted the ostracism from the same peers you used to abuse when you lost your power, about how you made friends with some the same girls you used to torment, and how you risked your sheb on two occasions to protect this world,” Revan’s lips curled in a grin as she held out her hand, “Not a bad job of redeeming yourself.”
“Uhm, thanks?”
“Revan, stop teasing poor Sunset,” Twi’ admonished her wife, smacking the older woman lightly on the shoulder, “And you owe the swear jar,” she added firmly as Spike and Mission giggled and the teens exchanged amused looks.
“Well, everyone is waitin’ for us back at tha farm,” Applejack said as she waved at her truck, “We got a ‘Welcome’ barbeque all set up an’ waitin’, with plenty of grilled veggies,” she added, glancing at the Equestrians.
“Not a problem, AJ,” Revan replied as she carried their bags over, “I’ve managed to broaden Twi’s culinary horizons a little, and she’ll eat poultry for special occasions … like a special meal during a family vacation.”
“Or shrimp,” added Spike, “It turns out Twi’ really likes shrimp.”
Mission started to giggle, “Auntie Rarity puwwed out her fainting couch once after Mommy ate aww the shrimp cocktaiw at a fancy party!”
“I’m sure whatever you have prepared will be wonderful,” the transformed alicorn said hastily, a deep blush coloring her face as the three teenagers chuckled, “Now we really shouldn’t keep everypony waiting!”
The truck bounced slightly as it made its way over the dirt road that wound through the orchards of Sweet Apple Acres, up to a familiar farmhouse, where a small group of people had gathered outside. “Oh, look, it’s Big Mac, Granny and Apple Bloom …,” Twi’ turned to the teens with a nervous smile, her eye twitching, “I’m … sure I can come up with an explanation for everything ….”
“Well, ya could jus’ tell ‘em tha truth,” the farmgirl suggested, “With all tha weird stuff goin’ on around Canterlot High, they already know about tha magic and ya bein’ a princess from pony world.”
“They do?” blinked Twi’, “Oh, well that does make everything much easier.”
Piling out of the truck, the Equestrians held back, letting Twilight, Applejack and Sunset take the lead, although Revan kept a hand on Mission’s shoulder to control the girl, who was almost bouncing with excitement as she waved eagerly at everybody.
Stepping forward, Sunset cleared her throat and addressed the slightly confused looking crowd (except for Pinkie Pie, who was enthusiastically waving back at Mission), “So, Twi’ said she was bringing a surprise, and she brought a doozy. This is her wife, Revan … and their daughter, Mission.”
Fluttershy let out a squee as she rushed forward and scooped up Mission, who giggled happily as she returned the embrace, “Hewwo, Auntie Fwuttershy!”
“Darling,” Rarity said reproachfully, “Why didn’t you tell us that you were married?”
“Because I wasn’t married yet when we first met …,” the princess flushed with embarrassment, “And, well, with the temporal distortion, I was afraid of how you girls might react to my actual age … I’m so sorry, can you please forgive me?”
The fashionista raised an eyebrow and looked at her friends to gauge their opinions, before embracing Twi’, “Of course we forgive you, darling, but you simply must tell us all about the wedding!”
“Yeah, yeah, the wedding, we’ll get to that” Rainbow waved her hand dismissively, “Let’s have a look at this wife of yours,” stomping forward, she put her hands on her hips and glared up at the older woman, who merely returned the athlete’s gaze with an amused half-smile, “Hmmm … you do realize that she looks like the Big Bad’s lieutenant from a movie or a Daring Do novel, right?” she asked, earning her a disapproving frown from Fluttershy and a slap on the head from Rarity, “What?”
Revan just chuckled, “Lieutenant? I’m full Big Bad material, thank you very much.”
“Yeah?” challenged Rainbow, “Then what would your villain name be?”
“Soultaker,” the scarred woman replied immediately.
“That’s not a very nice name,” observed Apple Bloom as she, Big Macintosh and Granny Smith walked over to join the group.
“I wasn’t a very nice person back when I earned it, Apple Bloom,” the Jedi replied casually, “Thank you for offering to host us, Granny,” she added, nodding to the oldest Apple.
“Don’t think nothin’ of it, young’un,” Granny waved off Revan’s thanks, “Frettin’ about how ya look ta yer friends an’ family causes plenty of foolish decisions,” she added as she reached over to give Twi’ a comforting pat on the shoulder, “I conjure tha same goes even for princesses, ya didn’t mean no harm, an’ no harm done. Now, let’s eat!”
Everyone eagerly descended upon the feast the Apples had prepared, happily chatting away as Twi’ and the teens caught up with each other, while the other Equestrians got to know the Apples from this side of the Mirror.
“I hate to be forward, darling, but I simply must ask, where is your ring?”
“Ponies don’t use rings to symbolize marriage,” Twi’ explained, “Though I’m familiar with the concept from Griffon and Minotaur culture. But we did receive these for our fourth anniversary,” she added, as she and Revan pulled out matching silver pendants, each set with a piece of pale blue crystal.
“Ooh, pretty!” chirped Pinkie as she leaned over for a look.
“Yes, they are indeed, Pinkie,” Rarity agreed, “Although I don’t recognize the stones ….”
“They’re shards from an Ilum crystal,” Revan explained, “The only one in Equestria, actually, they were a gift from Rarity, uh, pony-Rarity.”
“Well, that certainly explains their fabulous design,” the fashionista observed, “Now, tell us all about your wedding!”
Mission Sparkle, daughter of Twilight Sparkle and Revan Vao, little sister of Spike the dragon, and future Cutie Mark Crusader, watched the clouds idly as her parents, brother and assorted Aunts talked. It wasn’t that she didn’t like the story of her parents’ wedding, it was just that she had heard it so often already, and that cloud really looked like a bunny. Glancing around, she noticed that Big Macintosh was watching her, instead of talking with the rest of the big ponies, and he was wearing that “I’m thinking” frown he got sometimes, “Is something wrong, Uncwe Mac?”
“Ah’m sorry if Ah was starin’, Mission,” Macintosh apologized, “Ah was jus’ wonderin’ how old ya are, what with tha temporal distortion that Ms. Twi’ mentioned.”
“I’m five-and-a-hawf-years-old,” Mission replied proudly, “Next year I get to go to schoow !” her eager pronouncement caused chuckles, and a few amused head-shakes, from the others around the table.
“But how does that work ?” asked Fluttershy, her forehead wrinkling in confusion, “If Twi’ and Revan and, I suppose, Sunset all get younger from going through the Mirror, why is Mission the same age on both sides?”
“We’re … still trying to figure out exactly how Starswirl’s Mirror works,” Twi’ admitted as she and Sunset both gave embarrassed chuckles.
“Speaking of school,” Twilight broke in, pulling out her pad and pen once more, “Spike mentioned that you have students, Revan, what subject do you teach?”
“Actually, I’m the headmaster, and one of the three full-time teachers at a school of, well, I guess you’d call it magic.”
Pinkie cocked her head, “Well is it magic or isn’t it?”
“Force-training and magic can do a lot of the same things, and practitioners face many of the same risks,” Revan ran a hand through her hair as she tried to explain, “But they follow different rules, and folks who can’t do magic may be capable of wielding the Force … it’s complicated.”
“I thought Ilum crystal sounded familiar!” Twilight declared, slapping the table triumphantly.
“Good one, Revan,” Rainbow chuckled, “‘The Force’, what was next, claiming to be a Jedi?”
Instead of joining in on the laughter, Revan, Twi’ and Spike just stared at the others, “You’ve heard of the Jedi?!” the princess finally burst out incredulously.
“Aw, c‘mon, now ye’re jus’ overplayin’ it,” Applejack chided.
“Um, Applejack? I don’t think they’re playing a prank on us,” Fluttershy murmured.
“Of course they are ‘Shy,” Rainbow gave the pink-haired girl a friendly nudge, “There’s no way …,” silence descended on the table as Revan raised her hand and a drumstick floated over to her.
Twi’ swatted the smirking Jedi on the shoulder, “I thought you said you weren’t sure if your abilities would work on this side of the Mirror.”
“I wasn’t,” Revan admitted, “But I could feel everyone as soon as I recovered from the portal, and, well, just look at their faces, Twi’, it was hilarious!”
“Okay, their faces are adorable,” the princess giggled, “But you still shouldn’t tease them like that, so I’m fining you one drumstick.”
“I knew the smell of the Apple’s chicken would get to you eventually,” the taller woman grinned down at her wife as she handed over the drumstick before turning back to the rest of the gathering, “So, how do you know about the Force?”
“Star Wars,” everyone replied.
“Which wars, now?”
“Star Wars,” Sunset explained, “It’s a science-fantasy series of movies, books and comics on this side of the Mirror.”
“Wait, I’m fiction ?” asked Revan incredulously, “Is it at least good fiction?” seeing the conflicted looks on her hosts, and Big Mac waggling his hand, she reached up to pinch the bridge of her nose, “Wonderful.”
“It’s okay,” Twilight assured the older woman while Pinkie patted her shoulder, “Star Wars is a very iconic story, it’s just that there has been something like forty authors for the novels alone, it was inevitable that the quality would vary.”
“Girls!” Rainbow broke in, “You’re missing the point , we’re sitting here, having lunch, with an actual Jedi ! This. Is. So. Awesome!” she nearly squealed. The others nodded, conceding the athlete’s point, as they began to eagerly interrogation the transformed twi’lek, with even Granny and Big Mac leaning forward curiously to listen in.
“And Granny, Hondo Flanks, Cloudy Quartz, Mosely Orange and Princess Celestia have all been working to get the entire extended family together for the Apple Clan reunion in Manehattan next year,” Twi’ explained, “Celestia normally spends the Summer Sun Celebration away from the Court but arranging for Princess Luna and Cadance to have pre-planned time away from their duties as well is proving to be a tad difficult.”
“Hey, I volunteered to take over for a day or two and give the Princesses a little time off,” Revan pointed out, “But none of you will take me up on it.”
“Because holding Court is very different from running a small school or commanding a platoon,” her wife replied, “And there’s the little problem that you’re forbidden from going anywhere near an ambassador without a chaperon.”
“Talking to Luna like that, in front of other envoys to boot, the koochoo was trying to cause a confrontation,” the Jedi protested, “Saying it in front of me , of all people, just meant he had a death wish as well. And the Griffonstone ambassador supported my response wholeheartedly … once she stopped having nightmares.”
“And you nearly gave him what he wanted,” Twi’ scolded, “It was as much luck as anything else that we managed to avoid having a diplomatic incident with Prance.”
“And Rouge Traînée offering deliberate and extreme insults to one of the Diarchy wasn’t provoking an incident?” countered Revan, “I’ve seen wars started over less. Still …,” she sighed, “Okay, I guess I can see why you and the other Princesses won’t let me pick up more of the slack for you.”
“It sounds like you have rather the temper, Revan,” Rarity observed, “While I understand that you were goaded, it is something a lady should work on controlling,” she added, shooting a slightly reproachful glance at Rainbow and Sunset, her two most volatile friends, “Especially if she is in front of the public eye.”
“It’s getting late,” commented Twilight reluctantly, as she finally noticed the dark sky and the slight chill in the air, “And we all have work tomorrow,” everyone quickly rose to help clean up, and then exchanged good nights and promises to see each other on the morrow.
“So … what do you think of the girls?”
Revan looked up as she and Twi’ prepared for bed in the small guest room the Apple’s had given them, “I like them, they’re definitely our vod , but younger … less … mature, more excitable,” she grinned, “Seeing them like this is certainly an experience … so is meeting Twilight,” she added, her lips curling in a crooked grin.
“Mind out of the gutter, you incorrigible chi’kan ,” Twi’ retorted with a smile of her own, gently punching her wife in the shoulder, “She’s underage and in a relationship.”
The one-eyed woman laughed as she wrapped her princess in her arms, “Trust me, pika , one Twilight Sparkle is quite enough for me.”
“It’d better be,” growled Twi’ playfully as she cuddled closer to the Jedi.
Author's Note
This story is assuming that The Knight of the Old Republic was never made in the Equestria Girls reality. While this is a great loss to the Star Wars universe, it is also the only way to keep Revan’s name from being a dead giveaway to any Human!World Star Wars fans.
Revan opened her eye to the sound of birds chirping as the early morning sunlight spilled through the curtains. Sitting up, her lips spread in a goofy grin as she drank in the sight of Twi’ curled up next to her, and Spike and Mission sprawled in a tangle of limbs over on the cot the Apples’ had brought in.
She indulged in simply watching her family sleep for a time, before the need to be up and moving finally overrode her desire to laze about, throwing on a few clothes, the Jedi slipped through the silent house and out the front door. A few quick stretches, and Revan headed off into the orchards at a steady, ground-eating jog.
After a brisk run through the trees, Revan looped back to the farmhouse where she was looking forward to a quick shower and a traditional Apple family breakfast, but the faint sound of grunts and rhythmic thuds drew her to the barn.
Quietly walking up to the open door, the Jedi peeked inside to see … Applejack working out on a heavy punching bag. Leaning against the doorjamb, Revan settled in to watch the farmgirl’s training. When the blonde finally stepped back from the bag, she applauded, “That’s a formal martial style, isn’t it?”
“Eeeyup, kickboxing,” Applejack replied as she grabbed up a towel, both to wipe herself off and to help hide her blush at finding that the older woman, the trained soldier , had been watching, maybe judging, her practice, “Does pony me know any martial arts?” the farmgirl asked, her curiosity overpowering her, admittedly minor, embarrassment.
“AJ?” Revan asked as she walked over to give the heavy bag a casual punch, “No, she’s a brawler, almost none of us have ‘proper’ martial training, actually.”
The blonde stopped drying her face to lift a skeptical eyebrow, “None of ya? But ya’re a Jedi, ya must know some sorta fancy alien fightin’ style.”
“You mean like Teräs Käsi or the Echani arts? Eeenope, line solders don’t learn any of that kind of fighting,” Revan grinned at Applejack as she slipped into the Apple clan’s iconic accent for a moment, “They save that for the special forces types.”
“Tha Jedi didn’t teach ya no martial arts other than saberwork?”
“You’d be surprised at how many Jedi, and Sith too, focus purely on the Force and lightsaber training without bothering with more ‘mundane’ skills,” the older woman shrugged, “So … up for a round or two?”
The farmgirl dropped into a stance with a grin, only to be interrupted by a loud cough, “Granny says for tha two of ya ta stop playin’ around an’ go wash up, breakfast is almost ready,” Apple Bloom smirked at the pair from the barn door.
After a hearty farmhouse breakfast, Applejack and Apple Bloom headed into the city, AJ to her job at the Juice Bar and Bloom off to meet with her friends, while Mac and Granny started in on the day’s chores, with the enthusiastic help of Twi’ and her family.
With the extra hands, the work flew by, leaving everyone’s afternoons freer than expected. Revan, Twilight and Mission got a lift from Mac to see this “Mall” most of their friends worked at, while Spike and Granny stayed behind to “watch the farm” (Granny code for “catch a nice nap on the porch rocker”). “Okay, fillies,” Twi’ said as Macintosh drove away, “It’s just like the market back in Ponyville … but bigger … and indoors … and potentially full of things we’ve never seen before … wonderous new books and devices … what was I saying?”
“You were tewwing us how the maww was just wike the Ponyviwwe market,” Mission answered helpfully as she stared at the crowded parking lot, “There’s so many ponies, it’s wike when we go to Canterlot!”
“Just remember not to wander off, okay?” Revan reminded her daughter as she took the girl by the hand and lead her through the doors, inside, the three quickly moved off to the side to clear the path and began looking around, “Hey, there’s Applejack, let’s see what she’s selling.”
“Well, howdy ya’all,” the farmgirl greeted them, “Come to see what we do for work? How’s about a fruit smoothie?”
“Sure,” Twi’ agreed, prompting a happy cheer from Mission, “But, I thought humans didn’t eat grass?” she added, nodding to the small planter on one of the shelves.
‘That there is wheatgrass,” AJ explained, “Some folks think it’s good for ya, so we offer fresh grass juice as an additive ta tha smoothies, now what would ya like?”
“Strawberries and wheatgrass, pwease, Auntie Appwejack.”
“Sure thing, sugarcube, and for ya, Twi’?”
“I think I’ll have an orange, carrot and mango with the wheatgrass, please.”
“Apples and cranberries, if you’d be so kind, AJ,” Revan added.
“Here ya’all go,” the blonde said as she passed over their orders, “Now Pinkie an’ Sunset work in restaurants, so ya just droppin’ by ta see them probably wouldn’t work ta well, an’ we was plannin’ on grabbin’ ya for dinner anyway, but Twilight works over in tha Technology Barn an’ Rainbow is working in PrisimWing Sports, so ya can give ‘em a visit. Oh, an’ tha bookstore is up on tha second floor,” she added with a grin as Twi’ and Mission’s eyes grew wide and eager, “Ah’ll text everyone on ma next break an’ let ‘em know ta met at tha second-floor court at five-thirty. Ya girls go have fun now.”
Twilight turned to the door as the electronic chime sounded, “Welcome to the Technology Barn, how can we help you today?” she rattled off automatically before the identities of just who had entered sunk in, “Oh, hi!” her grin widened as she noticed the bags they were carrying, “Already been by to see Rainbow and the bookstore, huh?”
Revan chuckled, “My girls do love their books,” she admitted with an indulgent smile, “So, what technological marvels do you have for us today?”
‘Hmm … there’s no internet across the Mirror, so it would have to be something self-contained,’ the bespectacled girl tapped her chin in thought, ‘Ah! A tablet, so they can take some movies, books and music back to Equestria with them! And maybe a few rechargeable battery packs, too….’ “I think I have just the thing, if you’ll follow me, please,” leading the trio over to the wall, Twilight gestured to one of the minicomputers, “These tablet computers can store and play back movies, music, pictures, electronic books, do word processing, and even play games, although their video cards aren’t able to handle the more graphic-intensive ones,” she glanced over at the one-eyed, alien , woman, “So … pretty much like all your datapads, I guess,” she finished dejectedly.
“Nothing for you to be getting upset about,” the Jedi patted the younger girl on the shoulder as Mission gave her a comforting hug, “There’s only two working datapads in all of Equestria anyway, and now you’ve given Twi’ a way to bring some of this world’s knowledge back with her,” Revan nodded at her wife, who was playing with the tablet’s touch screen in fascination.
Relived that she hadn’t made a horrible gaffe, Twilight showed the visiting Equestrians some of the programs on the tablet and discussed a few peripherals and additional software packages they could consider, before moving over to the register to tally everything up, “So, with the tablet, two extra batteries, a battery recharger (not sure how you’re going to get that one to work) and the Encyclopedia Britannica program, your total comes too … two hundred and nine dollars and twenty-nine cents.”
“Here you are,” Twi’ replied, handing over the funds.
“And here’s your purchase,” the scientist smiled as she held out the bag, “I’ll see you guys after my shift, okay?”
“Sooo,” her shift manager, Silver Scepter, a former upperclassman from Crystal Prep, drawled as soon as the door had closed behind the trio, “I didn’t know you had a twin sister.”
“Oh, I don’t,” Twilight replied confidently, she had already planned for this potential issue, “That was my cousin Twila from Alabama and her family.”
“Your cousin, huh?” Silver shook his head, “I’d ask what kind of mischief you two used to get up to, but this is you we’re talking about.”
“Why do people keep acting like there’s something wrong with being a good, rules-abiding, student?” Twilight grumbled to herself as her manager walked back to the office.
Sunset waved to her friends as the five girls entered the court where Twi’ and Revan were playing chess while Mission colored in a book, “So, who’s winning?”
“Momma is pushing hard, but I think Mommy is weading her into a trap,” Mission replied, glancing up.
“They play a lot of chess?” Twilight asked eagerly, “Sunset and I play frequently, maybe we could have a game?”
“What is it with you eggheads and your chess?” Rainbow snorted, “C’mon, Rarity and Flutters are already heading over to Roma’s Pizzeria.”
“So, what do they have at this ‘pizzeria’, anyway?” Twi’ asked as they headed for the parking lot, Mission giggling as she rode Revan piggyback at the front of the little group.
“Well, they got pizzas, o’course,” Applejack offered.
“Salads and garlic bread,” Sunset continued.
“Video games!” Rainbow added with a grin.
“And skee-ball!” Pinkie and Twilight finished eagerly.
“You had us at ‘garlic bread’,” Revan said, while Mission cheered from her perch.
Fluttershy and Rarity waved from the large table they had claimed as the others stepped away from placing their orders at the counter, “Hello, darlings,” the fashionista greeted them, “Another work day over and done, and now we can relax.”
“Darn right!” Rainbow exclaimed, “Come on, AJ, Revan, I have some frustrations to work out,” she added, grabbing the bemused older woman by the arm and dragging her over to a bank of shooting games, while Pinkie, Twilight and Fluttershy led Twi’ and Mission over to the skee-ball machines.
“Okay,” explained Twilight as she dropped a token into the slot, “The goal is to roll these balls up the ramp and try to get them to drop into those holes, the more difficult the shot, the more tickets you get.”
“And then we take the tickets and buy prizes!” Pinkie added, pointing at the prize display as she bounced eagerly.
Mission frowned as she looked over the display, “How much is that one?” she asked, pointing at a yellow and green plush snail.
Twi’ smiled down at her daughter, “Looking to get Miss Smarty Pants a friend, sweetie?”
“Nuh-uh, it’s for Fwurry.”
“My niece,” the princess explained to the other girls, “Mission takes being a good big cousin very seriously.”
“Aww, that’s so sweet,” Fluttershy cooed, “Let’s go win you those tickets!” she grinned, holding up a five-dollar bill.
“That was good,” Twi’ sighed happily as she gently herded a half-asleep Mission, the plushy clutched in her arms, towards the waiting cars.
“‘cuse me,” Revan covered a burp as she nodded, “Yeah, we definitely should bring the recipe back through the Mirror, I bet it would go over well, and Burger Princess could use a little friendly competition anyway.”
Pinkie stopped bouncing along to stare at the Equestrians, “Wait, you don’t have pizza in ponyland?”
“The worlds aren’t completely identical, Pinkie,” Twi’ laughed, “Otherwise it wouldn’t be ‘ponyland’ would it? So, do we have a plan for tomorrow?” she asked, glancing around the group.
“Tha plan was a sleepover at ma farm,” AJ drawled as she stretched, “Maybe play some soccer?”
“And show you the original Star Wars trilogy,” Sunset added.
“It should be fascinating to see how accurate Mister Lucas’ and Mister Foster’s vision was,” Twilight observed eagerly, “That everything they, and so many other writers, imagined really exists is simply astounding.”
“No offense, Twilight, but I’m hoping that they got most of it wrong,” Revan shuddered slightly, “If a bunch of random authors from this world are accurately predicting what’s happened on dozens of planets on the other side of the Mirror, that would just be ….”
“Creepifying?” offered the farmgirl.
“Exactly.”
The bespectacled girl tapped her chin, “Actually, a number of things that are, or at least were , believed to be fictional have turned out to actually be real through the portal. Unicorns, dragons, magic, Jedi … I wonder how much of what we take for granted is imaginary back in Equestria?”
The nine women looked at each other as they considered Twilight’s speculation for a moment, before Rarity spoke up, “And on that existential note, darlings, I bid you all good night.”
Ch. 04; A Lazy Day Down on the Farm
The next morning, the Apples and their guests rose bright and early, greeting the day with another substantial breakfast and quickly finishing the day’s chores. With Granny and Macintosh heading over to Manehatten to visit relatives, and Apple Bloom off to a movie marathon at the cineplex with the other two members of the Canterlot Movie Club, the seven girls and their guests would have the farm to themselves for most of the day.
The other girls arrived around mid-morning, eager to get in a few rounds of soccer before they settled down for their own movie binge. They solved the uneven number of players issue by Twi’ and Twilight volunteering to takes turns being referee, trading off each half, while Spike and Mission cheered from the sidelines.
The game quickly descended into a series of mad scrambles, the ball constantly changing hands as the two teams struggled for control. Unsurprisingly, Rainbow Dash, captain of the soccer team, pushed her team to an early lead as she zipped around the field.
Catching a pass from Pinkie, Rainbow sent the ball careering towards the goal, and right into Fluttershy, bowling the pink-haired girl over. A few anxious seconds later, Fluttershy rose to her feet, the ball clutched in her hands and a proud smile on her face.
“Good goin’ ‘Shy!” Applejack cheered her teammate as Twilight declared a time-out, so everyone could catch their breath.
“That was a great bwock, Auntie Fwuttershy,” Mission praised the older girl, “It was just wike when you pwayed against the Coltstown Champions!”
“Fluttershy is the star defensive player for Ponyville’s buckball team, the Ponyville Punsters,” Twi’ explained.
“I am? I-I mean, she is?”
“Way to go, ‘Shy!” Rainbow said as she gave her dumbfounded friend a gentle slap on the shoulder, “’Course, with me leading the team, it’s no wonder that we’re doing good.”
“Actually,” Revan spoke up, a small smile curling her lips at the teenage athlete’s ego, “Pinkie Pie is the star offensive player, Applejack and Rainbow are the reserve players.”
The polychromatic-haired girl blinked as she absorbed this tidbit, “Pony-AJ and pony-me are the reserve players … and pony-Pinkie and pony-Fluttershy are the team stars … they must be awesome at this buckball game!”
Returning to their game, Rainbow’s and Applejack’s competitive natures began to get the better of them, and the (admittedly, unspoken) “no powers” rule eventually fell to the wayside, forcing Twi’ to end the game, both out of fairness to those players who lacked an applicable magical ability, and to limit the damage the girls could do to the farm in their enthusiasm, especially after a particularly energetic kick, combined with an equally eager attempt to block, put a pair of holes in the barn, but at least Pinkie had refrained (barely) from “kersploding” anything.
Less than an hour later, the four Equestrians were watching as the ‘space opera’ (as Twilight insisted on calling it) unfold before them with rapt fascination, while the other seven girls often tossed in their own comments or bits of trivia.
****
“Mommy, can we get a giant riding wizard?”
“I don’t think that there are any in Equestria, honey.”
“Aww, phooey.”
*****
“‘We’re completely unarmed’?” Revan stared at the screen in disbelief, “Leia’s ship had cannons and soldiers aboard, how is that unarmed?”
Applejack rubbed her forehead, “Ah think ya’re missin’ tha point here, sugarcube.”
****
“Hey, why didn’t Chewbacca get a medal?”
“That is one of the unanswered mysteries of Star Wars, Spike,” Sunset grinned down at the transformed drake sprawled out on the floor, “There’s been a couple of theories, but no, official, explanation that I know of.”
*****
“Go Wuke! Go save your friends, even if the wittle green man says not too!”
“You tell him, squirt,” Rainbow chuckled as she ruffled Mission’s hair.
****
“Wait, Darth Vader is Luke’s father? But Kenobi said he’d murdered Luke’s dad! I’m so confused ….”
Rarity patted the princess’ shoulder consolingly, “They’ll get into that in the next movie, darling, don’t fret about it right now.”
****
“Wook, Momma, she’s a twi’wek wike you!”
“And a slave, dancing for a Hutt,” the Jedi sighed, “Some things never change.”
****
“‘From a certain point of view’?” Revan groaned, “They’re using that garbage? It’s crap like that that makes people assuming every word coming out of a Jedi’s mouth is a self-serving lie,” the older woman shook her head in disgust.
****
“The strike team only left the village a few hours ago at most, how did the Ewoks get all of this set up?”
“Ah think ya’re over thinkin’ things again, Twi’.”
“Yea,” Pinkie added, “It’s only a movie, just sit back and relax.”
****
After putting Mission and Spike to bed for a short nap (Twi’ theorized that something about being transformed into a dog made Spike sleepier than normal), the nine girls returned to the living room to talk some more before they got to work on dinner.
“I’m glad you’re getting along so well with Sunset,” Twi’ murmured as she snuggled up against her wife.
“Yeah, Sunny’s a good sort, if rather rough around the edges,” the Jedi smiled down at her, “Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?”
The scholarly alicorn giggled and pulled her closer, “I hope this means you’ll also make peace with Starlight when we get back.”
“Maybe,” Revan replied, her voice going hard as she stiffened inside Twi’ embrace, “We’ll see.”
“‘Maybe’!” the princess retorted, her eye twitching, “You have every right to be angry with Starlight, Revan, but you have to let this go! This rancor of yours is twisting up your mind, and poor Starlight is constantly afraid that you’ll decided she’s irredeemable and execute her!”
“You and the younglings are the only reason I haven’t already!” the Jedi snapped back.
Both women ignored Fluttershy’s horrified squeak, as the seven teens stared in dismayed confusion at the argument that had suddenly erupted in their midst. It was clearly a private matter, but they were too shocked to leave and grant the couple their privacy.
“Please, Revan,” Twi continued in a softer tone, “Starlight made a mistake, she didn’t realize what would happen. Please understand.”
“Nerfshit! She deliberately and intentionally screwed with time to unmake your friendship with our vod , a friendship that she knew was essential to defeating Nightmare Moon, Discord and Tirek! She just didn’t care about the consequences to everyone else, so long as she ‘won’!” the Jedi ground out, each word falling as cold and sharp as a blade on the neck, “And each time, instead of returning to her proper time and place, she hid in the past so she wouldn’t have to face the results of her actions! Starlight may not have killed anyone with her own hooves, but she’s still guilty of mass genocide !”
Revan and Twi’ glared at each other for a moment, then the princess took a deep breath and tried, yet again, to reason with her hot-tempered wife, “Luna, Discord, Sunset, even you . You all did horrible things, things that some ponies said could never be forgiven. That you didn’t deserve to have a second chance. But those ponies were wrong ! Give Starlight her second chance.”
“What about Amber Moonlight?”
Twi’s brow furrowed in bewilderment, “I don’t understand.”
“Amber only set fire to several house with the intent to murder those inside. She only tortured and murdered a stallion and five foals. She only tried to murder me, three of my students and a member of the Guard when we tracked the deaths back to her. But nobody cried out for her second chance when I executed her. Where was Honey Grace’s second chance, for that matter? Or Sombra’s? Or Tirek’s ?” Revan closed her eye, “My heart wants you to be right pika , to believe that Starlight deserves the chance you’re giving her, that she won’t throw it away, and that our younglings and vod are right to give her their trust. But my head can’t understand how Starlight gets to be forgiven when so many others weren’t . It insists that there must be some line that there is no coming back from if you cross it, and if there is that line, then Starlight should be on the wrong side of it. And my gut is still burning that she caused the suffering and deaths of all of our family and friends, of the entire world , over and over again , and she gets to just walkaway like it never happened !”
“Wait,” Sunset broke in, her confusion and intellectual curiosity overriding her manners, “How could Starlight have possibly caused the same ponies to die multiple times?”
“She used a time travel spell to alter the past,” the princess explained distractedly, “Repeatedly.”
“Ah, that would … what ?! Time travel like that is impossible!”
Twi’ shook her head, “That’s what we thought too, it turns out it’s just very difficult, and extremely risky.”
Seeing that the quarreling couple had been distracted for the moment, Fulttershy piped up, “Umh, I realize this is a personal issue, b-but it sounds like your anger, however justified, isn’t really helping anything, and is only making everyone, including you, unhappy.”
“And just forgiving the murdering little schutta will make everything better?” Revan growled, turning to glare at the timid girl, “What about her victims? What about justice ?”
Applejack wrapped a comforting arm around Fluttershy’s shoulder as the pink-haired girl shrank back from the fury blazing in the Jedi’s eye, “But if ya’ll managed ta fix everythin’ after this Starlight gal went an’ broke time (Ah can’t believe Ah said that), then Ah’m not sure that she, actually, hurt anyone, since, well, it never happened,” she argued.
The one-eyed woman scowled at the farmer, “Twi’ and Spike remember the horrors and suffering Starlight caused. I remember all of it . Those people were real , and you want me to just … let it all go? Forget about it?!”
“No, of course you shouldn’t forget ,” Twilight said firmly, “But if you can’t find it in your heart to forgive Starlight, you need to try and at least let go of this anger, before it does irreparable harm to you or your family.”
Rainbow scratched her head uncomfortably, “I don’t know, girls, if everything Starlight did is as bad as Revan is saying, then I don’t think I’d be all that willing to forgive her either, especially if the judge only gave her a slap on the wrist when she finally got caught.”
“What do you expect them to do, Rainbow, darling?” Rarity asked pointedly, “AJ is quite right, aside from Revan’s, Twi’s and Spike’s paradoxical memories, as far as Starlight, the law, and even her ‘victims’ are concerned, she hasn’t done anything criminal. Punishing her for the actions of her … alternates, I guess we should call them, would make no more sense than condemning you for the crimes of your twin sister.”
“Dashie has a twin sister ? Why didn’t you tell me?” Pinkie Pie demanded of the athlete, “Why haven’t we seen her at school? Oh, oh, is she part of a super-secret organization of teen spies that regularly save the world from mad scientists?”
“No, Pinkie,” the fashionista sighed, “Rainbow does not have a twin sister, you’re getting distracted again, dear.”
“Aw, phooey,” the party girl pouted, before turning back to Revan, her face unnaturally serious as her hair deflated slightly, “You said the only reason you hadn’t killed Starlight was because it would upset Twi-Twi and the kiddies. Do you really think that killing Starlight would make things right, Revan?”
“Right?” the Jedi snarled, her eye suddenly burning a poisonous yellow, “I could kill the schutta and drag her back a million times, ten million, a hundred million , and it wouldn’t come close to paying for what she’s done!” Revan paused as her eye darkened back to its normal green, “Bones of the Emperors, what am I turning into ….”
Sunset rose from her seat to clasp the older woman’s shoulder, “Remember, redemption isn’t just for those who actually did wrong, it also keeps the victims from turning into new monsters in their pain and anger.”
Catching her friends’ eyes, AJ nodded towards the kitchen, and the seven teens slipped out, giving the spouses some privacy. “I know Revan has a temper, but to hold on to that kind of sheer rage ,” Rarity said with a slight shiver, “At least she seems to have realized it now. I hope her and Twi’ will be able to work everything out.”
“Do you think Revan will make friends with Starlight?” Pinkie wondered as she started going through cabinets for dinner fixings.
“I don’t think so, Pinkie,” Fluttershy sighed sadly, “But we can always hope.”
A small cough drew everyone’s attention Twi’ and Revan in the door, “Sorry you got dragged into all that,” the older woman apologized sheepishly.
“It’s a’right, sugarcube, sometimes ya jus’ need ta talk with folks what ain’t involved in order ta clear yer head.”
“So, let’s get cooking,” Revan said cheerfully, although her smile was rather brittle, apparently eager to put the recent quarrel behind them all, “Where do you need us?”
“How about you and Rainbow start prepping the vegetables?” Twi’ suggested quickly.
“Hey, my cooking is getting better,” pouted the Jedi.
“Of course it is, honey,” the princess assured her wife, but as soon as Revan’s back was turned, she turned to her friends and shook her head emphatically, triggering a spate of poorly concealed chuckles.
When the other Apples returned home, and Spike and Mission got up from their nap, they were greeted by the, rather large, meal that the girls had waiting for them. “Well, looky here, dinner’s waitin’ on tha table when Ah get home, an old woman could get used ta this,” Granny Smith grinned, taking her seat, “Thank ya, dearie,” she added, as Fluttershy handed her a cup of tea, “So, did ya young’uns all have fun today?” the elder Apple’s question sparked a lively banter around the table.
Later, as empty plates were pushed back and Pinkie and Applejack brought desert to the table, Rarity leaned over to tease Mission, “You know, darling, if you keep cuddling Spikey-wikey like that, he may forget how to walk.”
“But I have to give him wots of hugs, Auntie Rarity.”
“Why is that, Mission?” Flutershy asked, one eyebrow raised at the child’s odd declaration.
“Because Spikey’s my big brother and I wove him,” the two Apple sisters smiled at Macintosh as Mission continued, “But dragons get reawwy, reawwy big, and, one day, Spikey wiww be too big for me to hug anymore.”
“Don’t worry, kido,” Spike said as he shoved his nose into the giggling girl’s ear, “I’ll never be to big for you to hug, promise.”
The adults and teens at the table exchanged amused, happy looks at the scene before them, when it was interrupted by the doorbell.
“I’ww get it!” Mission eagerly volunteered, putting down Spike and rushing off to answer the door, “Hi, Auntie Caddy, Uncwe Shiny!”
Author's Note
Hello, my name is Dorath, and … I … might have a problem with how easily Starlight Glimmer was forgiven.
The two Twilights rushed to the living room, where they found a beaming Mission clinging to the legs of a very confused Police Lieutenant Shining Armor and Principal (formerly Dean) Cadance Mi Amore, “Twily? What’s –,” Shining started to ask, before the fact that he was looking at two of his little sister left him gaping, his mouth moving, but with no words coming out, as he tried to process what he was seeing.
Cadance, having been exposed to more of the magical weirdness that was going around Canterlot these days, was quicker to recover than her boyfriend, “Ladybug? Is there anything you’d like to tell us?”
The Apple’s and the rest of their guests migrated to the living room to listen as Twilight and Twi’ explained everything; cross-dimensional duplicates, species changes (a revelation which had both Shining and Cadance staring as they tried to wrap their minds around it), temporal variations resulting in different ages (with Sunset hurrying them through that part as quickly as she could manage) and ending with the current visit.
“I see … it really sounds rather like something from out of a fantasy novel, doesn’t it?” the principal said, exchanging bemused looks with Shining, before her lips curled in a grin, “Of course, you know what this calls for.”
Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake, Clap your hands and do a little shake!
Amused grins and friendly giggles filled the room as the others watched Cadance, Twilight, Twi’ and Mission perform their time-honored ritual. “Ya’re grinnin’ like a loon, ya know,” Apple Bloom observed as she gave Revan a small jab with her elbow.
“Because that never ceases to be adorable,” the Jedi replied, “Trust me, it’s even cuter when ponies do it.”
“Wait, it can get cuter ?” Fluttershy asked, fanning herself, “Oh dear ….”
“Well c’mon in an’ grab a chair,” Granny said, waving the two inside, “Pinkie Pie, bless her sugar-addled heart, made sure we got plenty of desert ta go around.”
“So, what brings ya’ll buy?” inquired AJ, after everyone had gotten a slice of pie and settled into the living room.
“Twily forgot her allergy medication,” Cadance explained, holding up the bottle of pills, “So Shiny and I offered to drop them off while we were out,” turning back to Twi’ and Twilight, the principal shook her head in amusement, “So, my little ladybug’s counterpart is a princess, a scholar, a national hero and a librarian! I always knew she had the potential to be great,” she smiled, ruffling the bespectacled girl’s hair, before turning her curious gaze on the one-eyed woman, “And what do you do, Revan?”
“Oh, a bit of this, a bit of that. I headmaster and teach at a small school, do some work as a government agent on occasion, that sort of thing.”
Revan’s restrained reply clearly didn’t satisfy Twilight, Rarity, Apple Bloom, Sunset and Rainbow, who were all making various encouraging gestures, while Pinkie bounced slightly in her seat chanting “Tell them, tell them, tell them --”
Shining raised an eyebrow at the girls’ behavior, “So, I take it that there is something else you want to add?” he asked dryly.
“Apparently,” she replied, raising a hand to levitate over another piece of pie before she turned back to the dumbfounded policeman, “I think they want me to tell you about how I’m a retired Jedi and a former Sith,” Revan grinned slightly as Shining’s expression went from shocked to elated at sharing a room with someone from out of one of his favorite franchises, “Personally, I don’t quite see what the big deal is, but then I’m still trying to cope with how my entire race, culture and history are a popular fiction on this side of the Mirror.”
Shining turned to Twilight, “Is that why you borrowed the original trilogy today?” he inquired eagerly.
“Original trilogy?” Twi’ looked up enthusiastically, “So there is a sequel?”
“Prequel actually,” Rarity replied, “And it wasn’t well received by everyone,” she added.
“The prequels never happened,” Rainbow declared adamantly, while Shining nodded in agreement, “There are only three Star Wars movies.”
“Thank you for illustrating my point, Rainbow.”
The conversation had been going on for a while, and wandered through several topics, when Shining caught the Jedi’s attention, “A word, please, Revan?” the blue-haired man asked, nodding to the front door. With a shrug the transformed twi’lek joined him on the porch, Big Mac quickly following on their heels, too Shining’s confusion.
“Let me guess,” Revan chuckled as she looked the two over, “You ,” she pointed at Shining, “What to give me the ‘don’t ever hurt her’ speech because Twi’ is your little sister’s doppelganger and you’re feeling all big brothery and protective, while you ,” she pointed at Macintosh, “Want to give me the same speech because Twilight is like another little sister to you. Despite me and Twi’ having been married for years. Am I hitting near target?” the two men blushed slightly under her smirking gaze, despite towering over the one-eyed woman.
“We really that easy ta read?”
“Hey, I do know another version of you guys,” Revan replied, slapping the farmer on the shoulder, “And the both of you have always been the protective types.” She leaned forward while stage whispering to Big Mac, “Shiny’s double practices his ‘terrorize the suitor’ speech in front of a mirror for when his daughter starts dating,” giving the flummoxed Shining Armor a cheeky wink, she continued in a normal tone, “Don’t worry, Cadance thinks it’s cute.”
The policeman chuckled, “You’ve been through this a few times, I gather.”
“Considering how big our family is, we’ve started scoring people on their ‘talks’,” Revan observed, “Blueblood actually has one of the higher scores.” Seeing Shining’s surprise and Macintosh’s confusion, she explained, “Back through the Mirror, Blueblood is, to quote Rarity, ‘a poncing twit and a prat’, but he’s very devoted to his family, and when Shining and Cadance started to get serious, he decided to have the ‘talk’ with Shining, who was bigger, stronger, and a cadet in the Guards at the time,” after sharing a brief laugh with the two men over her little story, the Jedi grinned at them, “So, we good?”
Macintosh and Shining exchanged glances and then nodded, the three of them walking back in to catch the tail end of the current discussion, something about a movie starring a murderous sheep. Seeing Revan’s confused look, Twi’ explained, “Fenton, Death Sheep from Tartarus is coming out in a few months, and Apple Bloom and the others are planning to catch it.”
Spike scratched at an ear, “Isn’t that the movie AJ, RD and Pinkie were going to see this weekend?”
“Wait, ya got magic, an’ flyin’ ponies, an’ aliens , an’ ya get tha movies faster too ?” Apple Bloom crossed her arms in a pout, “Ah think somebody’s playin’ favorites.”
Later that evening, after Shining and Cadance had left, Granny, Macintosh and Apple Bloom had retired to their rooms, and Mission and a (grumbling in protest) Spike had gone to bed, the nine women gathered in the living room to continue their evening.
“So, what’s next?” Revan asked.
“Well,” Twilight pushed up her glasses as she replied, “According to my guide book the common options are movies, boardgames, telling ghost stories, makeovers, gossiping and pillow fights.”
“Guide book?” Twi’ glanced up curiously, “Would this be Slumber 101: All You’ve Ever Wanted to Know –”
“— About Slumber Parties (But Were Afraid to Ask) ,” the scientist finished happily, “Yes, do you know it?”
“I used it to plan my very first slumber party back when I first moved to Ponyville,” the princess answered with a grin.
Fluttershy raised her hand diffidently, “Um, c-could we, maybe, not have any ghost stories? Please?”
“And no asking Revan for war stories either,” Twi’ added, “We can save those for another time, okay?”
After the others eventually agreed (but not without some grousing from Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie), Revan spoke up, “Well how about another movie, then?” her proposal quickly accepted, she continued, “What should we watch?”
“An action flick!” Rainbow and Applejack immediately declared.
“How about a nice romance?” Rarity suggested, with Fluttershy nodding along eagerly.
“Comedy!” Pinkie insisted.
“Girls, girls!” Twilight stepped into the nascent dispute, “How about a comedy-adventure, with romance? Something that is eminently quotable for our guests to remember?”
“What’ve ya got in mind, sugarcube?”
The bespectacled girl reached into her backpack and pulled out a DVD case, “The Princess Bride.”
After watching the movie, and Twilight promising the enthusiastic Equestrians she would use Applejack’s computer to download it into Twi’s tablet, and engaging in a pillow fight (which Fluttershy won, to the surprise of all, including herself), the young women were beginning to burnout from their long day, and they settled down to relax with video games and gossip.
“Really, Twi’? Not a single suitor before Revan?” Rarity asked as she brushed out Fluttershy’s hair, “I find that hard to believe, darling.”
“Well … there might have been one or two others, but I didn’t realize it at the time. I’m not always that good at picking up on social cues,” the princess admitted with a faint blush, “But after Revan and I became a serious thing, they backed off like gentlecolts.”
“Well, except for that Patrician bastard,” the Jedi grumbled.
Sunset looked up from the book she was idly flipping through, “What’s this now?”
“A few months after our marriage, Duke Patrician showed up in Ponyville in order to ‘woo’ me,” Twi’ sighed, “I honestly don’t know what he was thinking, or why he waited almost a year after I ascended to start ‘courting’ me, either.”
Applejack glanced back from the video game she was playing against Rainbow with a raised eyebrow, “Ah could hear tha quotes in there. What exactly did this Patrician feller do, anyway?”
“Let’s see, on the first day he barged into our home, which, since it doubled as the town library was somewhat excusable, but still rather rude, treated Spike like a servant, and declared that he was there to sweep me away to a ‘proper life in Manehattan, away from this miserable backwater and its plebeians’, and then he started going on and on about ‘cementing the union between our great houses’ and ‘the further glory of Equestria’. It took nearly fifteen minutes before I could explain that I had no idea what he was going on about.
“And do you know what he said? ‘Why, our marriage, of course,’ like it should have been obvious! And when I protested that I was already happily married, he started on this rant about how it was a ‘meaningless political arrangement’, and how I ‘belonged to Equestria’ and everyone would understand I should be with him and not ‘some alien nobody’, and that my entire marriage to Revan was just a ploy by the Crowns to keep her technology under Royal control! And he never, not once, actually asked me to marry him!”
“Wow,” Sunset blinked at the princess, “That’s some loony conspiracy logic right there, to even think Celestia would do something like that ….”
“You gave the cad a piece of your mind, of course,” stated Rarity.
“I didn’t get a chance too,” Twi’ giggled, “Spike suddenly had a ‘coughing fit’ and sent Patrician running out of the library with the tip of his tail on fire.”
“Hah!” the athlete chortled, “Bet that got him out of your hair!”
“Unfortunately, no,” the Equestrian groaned, “It did keep him away from the library, at least, but he spent the next three days hounding me whenever I was in town, being extremely condescending to anyone he talked to who wasn’t me, while bragging to them about how he was going to marry me and take me away to a ‘real’ city, still without ever bothering to actually propose to me. And he tried to have the Mayor declare Spike a rabid animal that had to be put down for ‘assaulting his person’!”
Fluttershy’s jaw dropped, “He didn’t!”
“He tried,” Twi’ said solemnly, “But Mayor Mare told him that if he felt he had a legitimate complaint, he could lodge a report with the gendarme like anyone else. Although,” the transformed alicorn giggled, “She did thank him for letting her know that Spike needed to see a doctor about allergies before he accidently damaged anything important .”
Pinkie popped a s'more in her mouth, “So, how did you get rid of Mister doody-head?”
“That took a bit of work actually,” the princess admitted, “After that first day, he made a point of never doing anything that could even potentially be considered illegal, and just being insufferable and pompous wasn’t sufficient grounds to run him out of town, no matter what Rainbow Dash said, and since he never did go to the gendarme, it would have been easy for him to play off his ‘request’ to the Mayor as ‘just talk’ … so, finally I broke down and asked the Crusader’s to deal with him,” Twi’ admitted, blushing deeply.
“The who?” Twilight asked.
“The Cutie Mark Crusaders,” Revan explained, “Apple Bloom, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, Ponyville’s resident bundles of well-meaning chaos, mayhem and tree sap.”
Applejack blinked up at the one-eyed woman, “Tree sap?”
Twi’ shrugged, “I don’t understand it, but every third or forth of their little adventures that they go on, they come home covered in tree sap … even if they were just off learning to bake .
“Anyway, by noon the fourth day, Patrician had packed his bags and boarded the train – and was covered in tree sap,” everyone broke out in a spate of chuckles.
“Were where you during all of this, anyway, Revan?” Fluttershy finally managed to ask as her giggles faded.
“Me?” the Jedi leaned back against her wife’s knee and stretched, “I was down in Mexicolt helping with a chupacabra outbreak. The first I knew of any of this was coming home and seeing Twi’ treating three extremely smug looking Crusaders to milk shakes.”
“So,” Pinkie leaned forward eagerly, “How’d they do it? How did they get Patrician-I-don’t-ask-Permission to stop being all nuisancy?”
“I don’t know,” the princess admitted, “Whenever I ask them about it, they just rub their hooves together and cackle … actually they’ve gotten rather good at creepy cackling, which is rather unsettling of itself ….”
“Thank you, darling,” Rarity groaned, “Now I’m going to have dreams of a creepy, evil, cackling Sweetie Belle, and she’ll probably be wearing some absolutely tacky witch costume.”
“Sorry.”
Author's Note
Fenton, the Death Sheep from Tartarus, is a reference to the song Sheep Marketing Ploy by Tom Smith, it’s an amusing little ditty, and a YouTube link is provided below for those who are curious.
Ch. 06; Goodbyes And Future Plans
Late the next afternoon, the Canterlot High girls gathered to see their Equestrian friends off, with Pinkie Pie spinning a giggling Mission through the air as the others said their farewells and exchanged hugs, “Uhm, maybe next time you could stay a little longer?” Fluttershy asked, twiddling her fingers, “We could visit the beach, or something, if that’s alright.”
“I think that would be great, Fluttershy,” Twi’ smiled at her shy friend, “Maybe we can see you girls perform?”
“That sounds like a capital idea, darling,” smiled Rarity, as Applejack clapped Revan on the shoulder.
“Ya know, we never did get around ta havin’ that spar.”
“What spar?” Rainbow asked, “Did you guys have a match? Without me ?”
“No, we didn’t have a match without ya,” the farmgirl groaned, “We was jus’ goin’ ta have a friendly work out, but we never got around ta it, okay?”
“Actually, how about doing this again in August?” suggested Sunset, “We’ll be out of school, so it will be easier to have an extended visit, it’ll be plenty warm for hitting the beach, and there’s the All-State Open Martial Arts Tournament, which I know AJ and Rainbow are already planning to try out for.”
Twi’ and Revan exchanged glances and nodded, “Sounds like a plan,” the Jedi grinned, “But I’m afraid it’s that time.”
“Aww,” Pinkie pouted as she bounced over, Mission perched on her back, “Are you felling better about Starlight, Revan?” the party girl asked, her face momentarily serious.
“Maybe,” the older woman said uncertainly as she picked up her daughter, “I hope so, anyway. Time to say goodbye to your Aunts, Missi.”
“Okay, bye-bye Aunties!” the girl waved and then blew everyone a huge kiss with a loud mwa , “I wove you!”
“Thank you for everything!” Twilight called as the seven teens waved back and called their goodbyes, then the statue’s pedestal seemed to ripple, and the four Equestrians were gone.
Author's Note
My thanks to everyone for reading.
