Beyond Our Souls

by Slendy

Rating: everyone
Tags: Main 6, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Adventure, Slice of Life, Human
Length: 20638

A mare has arrived in the town of Ponyville, ready to give sass and kick ass, as she searches for seven rings of untold destruction, and a way out of the world of Equestria. With help from what could become her new allies. Downside? She 'WAS' a guy

Dimitri isn't your typical human in Equestria, since his trip to hell was put on hold to aid an unknown entity named 'Gambit' in tracking down 7 powerful rings across Equestria, the problem is, he was sent there as a girl, a mare. Now irritated, and having to deal with his new tone of life, his search for the rings won't come easy. Especially when he has to find the rings before a dangerous creature from a time before Equestria claims them, he must put aside his stubbornness and accept that having a few allies isn't such a bad idea.

Published 2019-02-12 01:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-03-24 10:35:46 UTC

Story Time Is Best Time

A shadowy hand turns the page
A dark theatre, move across the stage
Teeth like a cone, scrape against the sky
Feelin' alone in room full of life
Stealing a few extra moments and fighting against time

I hated that sound, the tone my voice had portrayed the message I sung to myself with my head slumped on the bar-stand, not wanting to lift a single limb that hung below me, my nose snorting a gust of air to push my mane from my eyes. I could smell the lemons that had left a scent from whatever cleaning agent remained on the wood, the only source of joy left in my life, or second life if I were to be technical about my time, which was utterly wasted on such a mediocre event within the last five hours of my second life.

Pushed on and pushed aside
I've changed my song to match each story, I've changes sides
Can I watch 'em as they fall when they finally try to stand
Redeem myself for everyone I've buried with these hands?

I was once human, ya know? Had a decent life, good friends and family, cafe job that paid well, games and books, the whole set. Yet, my life hasn't been the same, already I miss it all, even the tiny flies that annoyed me day in and day out, how you take every fragment of your life for granted in the face of fate, who had a fun way of playing your life like a tool, an object awaiting the moment its use runs dry or rusted beyond use, yeah, that's me.

I fight and I fight
Just to keep the spark alive
But if there's nothing on the other side
Why can't I leave well enough alone and go to the light?

I peaked my ear up, alongside my lazy, crimson right eye at the window, beyond the strands of my mane that remained, seeing the rain batter the window like it did me not long ago, cracks of thunder rumbled after the flash of gold, the distant striking of lightning to be unseen by me, given my depressed attitude and singing.

I was the 'MARE', yeah, you heard that right, slumped against the bar-stand, my head under locks of black, red, and hazel hair that was ragged and wet from previous encounters. My now white coat a damp mess under what remained of my torn cloak, which too had seen better days given its burn marks, torn holes and jagged ends. All-in-all, my day sucked.

I guess it all started just over a day ago, depends on how time in limbo works, when I had a normal motive of death to call to.

Oh, and I was a guy back then.

This is my story, for better or for worse. I guess sometimes you got to roll the dice.

Just let it die (go to the light)
Just let it die (go to the light)
Just let it die (go to the light)
Just let it die (go to the light)
Just let it die (go to the light)
Just let it die (go to the light)
Just let it die (go to the light)

Author's Note

I've only seen one story like this and I found it funny and nice to read, so I thought I give it a go myself. This series, if I continue would be part of a Book series so I may quit if I ever felt like it. Hope you enjoyed the prologue, and seeya in the next chapter!

Next Chapter: A Gambler's Ace

A Gambler's Ace

So, my day began like any other....

*HONK-HONK*

I gazed to my left, blaring eyes of a dragon piercing my gaze upon my blunt reaction to what would be a slab of steel and rubber crashing into my side like a pancake failed to be flipped. I only blinked once with my phone in my hand, yet in the corner of my eye I saw the green man mocking me with that false information of safety, bloody last laugh of the universe was by a blinking light, who knew?

"Oh, son of a-" First I saw white and pain, soon after came nothingness and black, yeah, I think I died, that's going to put a damper on my perfect arrival to work, and my tips

. . . .

Nothing. No stairway to a golden false reality, no black abyss to the planes of brimstone and demons, I was nowhere, and I was alone. Now I was unnerved, I get that I avoided a major clash with an eternity of pain and torment, but a lifetime spent without anyone else to talk to, or to interact with was beginning to get to me, I may like 'my time', but isolation is a fate I was never inclined to enduring.

Its funny how I'm already beginning to crack under the thoughts of isolation for the rest of my eternal death, perhaps this was simply fate, life was something we were meant to cherish, and some of us found that meaning, yet its something you can't just learn from words, those who have nearly died had only ever caught a glimpse of that future, so they lived their lives with meaning, they did it out of fear of this bleak, endless void. I don't blame them.

But if....say a God or Gods had set this course for us, why? If a child died, they would be so alone, more scared than me or anyone with better reins of life and death, just these thoughts hurt to think of, not for those, I never knew the faces or names of, but because my family would suffer like this too. Now, I never show signs of affection often, I suck at it, but if my family is ever endangered, that someone who 'dare' mess with my sisters, all sympathy for the attacker is gone. So the thought of beings more powerful than me setting out 'this' future for them, that turned what blood I would have to a boiling mixture of anger and spite.

"You know what sucks about death?" I spoke to no-one, my insanity slipping in, but without any being to talk to or voice my final regrets too, its always best just to admit your sins to yourself, I guess. "That above everything I've done....all the stupid, painful, funny memories I have beside friends, family.....my sisters.....I can't ever make more....and I guess that...I can't ever be there for my two annoying sisters too, help them grow, avoid the mistakes I caused myself....but above everything else....my life is the best bet...I ever...."

I turned what I assumed to be my soul to the black void above me, I imagined there were stars, an unreadable count of worlds and universes staring back at me, gleaming and basking in endless freedom from a single speck of a solar system. Yet I closed my eyes with only a silver line of regret. "Lost..."

"Heheheheheahahahahaha~!" Any semblance of emptiness left me....a few hours? Days even? That moment I heard a voice to my right. "Oh-Oh Gods above me! You....you died to a bus....hahahaha! No-no-no-no, that's....just comical, don't ya think?"

"I...uhh, hello?" I was puzzled now, when I did turn, I saw the face of, well, not exactly a 'face', but two massive, golden ovals in the black sky, with tipped ends, almost like eyes with pupils or irises, just a single color, then they narrowed to his chuckle, I believe its a guy from the tone of voice

"I mean, you could have kicked the bucket in like....a lot of ways, but by a mode of transportation, that's on a whooooole new level of amusement, oh Trinity was right to pick you, just the thought of your death has me on board with this plan, I cannot wait to see how this turns out."

Now I was merely blanking out, here I am, among what is my prison for the rest of my afterlife, then along comes a strange entity rambling about my death by a pink bus with the ramming speed of a bull under the cover of red, and a 'plan' he has for me? Now, if any normal person was in my situation, they would have started freaking out, calling this guy God, or would have lost any semblance of sanity. Me? I'll just skip all those parts and get to the calm and reasonable phase.

"If you're God, then the universe is screwed," I answered his ramblings, which made the eyes freeze, before they widened at me, the bottom part lifting like he was chuckling

"As thoughtful as that comment is. I'm no God, better yet, my boss is a Goddess, so she's the one to thank, I'm just following orders, which I really never do anymore, but given how messed up the Multiverse is now, someone has to clean it up, so what better than the Nightmare with the knowledge to do so?" I was back to square one

"Does anything human come out of your non-existent mouth?" He paused, and I rolled my eyes. "Your boss is a Goddess, you're a Nightmare, a literal, physical form, not a dream, and you chose, me?"

"Well, actually I just won your soul in an auction. The rest you already kept in mind, good for you, gnat." I heard him clap from somewhere, while I could only stare with a blank face

"You know, hiring someone and saying that you bought them is not good at making me like you. " I bluntly replied, but I couldn't help but feel a little elated at what he was implying, which could mean a way out of this bleak world of mine. "So....do I get a name with the voice?"

"Gambit's the name, the Multiverse's largest, single trader of anything meta or so on. Currently on an important quest for that of Trinity." So he has access to powerful items too, interesting

"Ok, Gambit, how am I involved in this plan of yours?" Hey, if I get a chance out of being alone for the rest of my life, anything would do, hell, I'll take being turned into one of those talking ponies from my sister's favorite show if it meant I was out of my own eternal isolation

For his answer, I heard the click of fingers, followed by a tiny flash of light before me. Now, I stared directly at the small, white ring before my eyes. Its surface was a smooth silver, with darkened details across its face, but within the cracks of letters, it hummed a soft white tone, like the fall of snow against the light of day, but from where I stared, I felt it, a resonating heartbeat to its form, its drum was soft, gentle, yet it held back something else. Power.

"This here is a Ring of Reality, the last in my collection. With the sacrifice of fourteen Gods. Seven of Virtues and the others of Sins, these rings were forged." Gambit spoke in a voice that held familiarity in his tone, did he know them? In another flash of colors, six more translucent rings circled the white ring

"The Ring of Dreams." Red. "The Ring of Emotion." Purple. "The Ring of Soar." Sky Blue. "The Ring of Origin." Yellow. "The Ring of Concept." Emerald Green. "The Ring of Lost." Blue. "And last, the ring I gift to you to use to find the others. The Ring of Bladedance. The power to conjure any weapon that you know of, so long as it can exist within the reality to stand upon. So sadly, no guns, which I think is stupid, but then Trinity said I was stupid and I got sad." The eyes looked hurt for a split second

"Why can't you obtain them?" I asked, as I continued to stare at the only ring that remained, the white glow of the ring was infectious, almost lulling me in, I couldn't sense any malice intent, but something inside it wanted me to have it, I can't describe it, yet it was as if the beings that gave their lives to the rings were there, watching me with judgmental eyes of worth

"I...ahem, can't....not for a long time, comes with the territory of being as popular as me, but I'm me, so you can never be too popular. Still, you can do this...I know you can, I was the one who chose you." He sounded too optimistic about that, but hey, if he has faith in someone like me, who am I to put him to shame. While the process of realizing that some strange person was giving me a second chance at life was shady, there is currently no shade for as far as I could see, so why not? The hell do I have to lose?

"Alright, Gambit, I'm in." I would immediately begin to regret those words

"Oh, right, before I forget, I may have lost your new body on the way....but don't worry! I got a replacement that....err, ha-have fun!" Wait wha?

"Wait wha?"

*Click*

That there. That single, resonating click of invisible fingers. That was the start of everything wrong, so very wrong. But it was also, the beginning....

"AHHH....ow-ow....ow..ahhh-ow!" Did I ever mention how the universe hates me? No? Well, the universe hates me. I now flew off the side of a colorful cliff, my body had already tumbled down a small embankment, throwing my body to the forest below, but for the moment I had to look, the world was breath-taking

It was a lush green, with forests dotting the valleys and settlements beyond my eye-sight. With a huge collection of mountains in the horizon, a railway leading off towards the unknown. The world was so bright and filled with a sense of purity, untainted by corruption or death, unlike Earth, which was far worse off, a did see a small village ahead though, but that flew behind more trees, as I came crashing down with a painful reminder of gravity.

My body snapped through branches and leaves, whipping and snapping at my cause of chaos with each foot dropped, before I finally hit the ground with a soft thud, the trees a savor from my near second death, something I'd rather avoid conflict with for as long as I was able to draw breath from the air. I shouldn't complain about Gambit's less than comfortable landing, at least I felt a smile bring itself to reality on my lips.

"I....I'm alive....I'M ALIVE~!" I laughed on the ground with more bliss than any day of the week, every fiber of me was reborn like fires to a phoenix, each ounce of blood was clean and pure, my body wasn't broken or damaged, say for the violent arrival, and I felt my muscles rejoice at the added strength without fatigue or weight, I was completely healthy to the core of my soul, which I couldn't be happier to hold close to myself again. "Thank you....."

Wait....tilting my head, I felt like I forgot about...THE RING! I felt my back lurch up, to my surprise, the trees were a lot taller than I thought they'd be? I quickly felt around my....hands? Reaching around them, I pulled my hands up towards my line of sight, my arm was there, but a pure, white fur had covered the length, whilst my hand was gone, no palm or fingers to speak of.

. . . .

"AHH MY FINGERS, no-no-no-no, I know I left them somewhere!" I threw all signs of calmness out the window for panicking, throwing my head back and forth, noting that I was shorter and that my legs had no toes, just a white, flat....hoof, my body was the same, say for the wild black, red, and hazel tone of a....tail? I had a tail now. "This is a joke right? I know God can hate me sometimes but this!?"

"Ok....calm down, Dimitri, this....is....okay. I just need to take this slow, you got this, you always got this. Yeah, yeah I got this!" Self-moral has increased, but my voice was....off, and now I looked to my chest, feeling something cold rest against my fur. Tilting my head, I sighed in shaky relief at the white ring, now around my neck on a silver chain, alongside a small card chime that held a dark brown fabric in-place. Twisting my left arm back, I felt the rough fabric move past my shoulders and spine. So I had a cloak and hood now, well, at least I'm not totally naked, fur aside, I still feel naked

"River....river....where could thou be sought?" Old English aside, I kept silent among the many screams of my mind against my current form, it didn't take long for my now pony-like ears to catch onto the running of a stream, I guess enhanced hearing is an upside, an insignificant upside, but good nonetheless. Before I could move, I realized something. "How do I walk? Trot? Na, walk."

Looking down at my hooves, I placed my front hooves down, before lifting my backside to stand, with a slight wobble, I managed to stand firm on the grass, noting how I had crushed a few flowers on my fall, that sucks they were red too. Now, if its like crawling, then I should picture that. Right hoof, then my back left, followed by my front left, then my back right. To my child-like giggling, I had managed to walk slowly to my right in the direction of the water.

"Dimitri, one, physical body, zeroooo." Ok, I think I can handle this a little more. I put one foot in front of the-Ow! Ok, maybe I need a little more time to learn to grasp the coordination of being a quadruple

"I think I jinxed it, the universe hates me." I hated it, every fiber of my being hated itself and I did too, if my own visible shiver at my vocal pattern didn't add to my overall depression, I can't say what will. Let's start with how I look, which is why I'm currently throwing pebbles in the water to avoid looking at my face any more than I currently am, just the sight and sound was enough to force an empty wave of my soul to leave my body again

My coat was a nice tone of white, with my, ahem, 'Mane' and 'Tail' being a unique combination of red, black and dark brown locks, all messy like my natural hair, along with a small horn, and my eyes were a piercing red, I liked the scheme, but that is as far as my enjoyment goes, I didn't have the build of a typical guy, nor did I have the features that came with those equines from the show I watched with my sisters, of course, I ended up in a kids show, only made sense to drain all the pride I had as a guy out of my system, you know, wipe the slate clean.

This included my gender.

I stared down with disgust, running out of sizable stones to ripple the reflection in any way I could, leaving my new eyes to stared impassively at the sight of the girly curves and muzzle, the longer eyelashes, and lack of...well, I'm a girl now, so my voice is even higher, but thankfully I didn't sound like a bloody child, not that the situations escalation was dampened, oh no I bloody hate this.

"Gambit, if you're there, please just kill me, I rather spend the rest of my eternity alone again, hell, send me to Equestria Girls, at least I could keep my fingers!" I waved angrily at the air above me, my body falling back onto the grassy bank, with the sun poking through to provide me with a comforting warmth. I sighed heavily, closing my eyes for a moment to take in the sunlight for a moment. "I guess I can't complain, I am alive again, just...well I'm glad the colors aren't pink, that would be the end of me."

Opening them, my hoof softly scooped the ring around the chain on my neck up, allowing me to fully view the mystical artifact, noting the shimmering texture to the light, its white markings reminded me of something from a fairy tale, then again, I am in a literal world of magic and myth, so this is to be the norm I guess, say for my apparent new body. A valuable lesson never takes a body from a stranger from the void...it could use some work.

"Okay, Dimitri, you have the power of the master race, sure, you can't fly so magical prowess is the next best thing." If I actually knew how to use magic, well...hmm. I sat up straight again, closing my eyes to softly listen to the world around me, all while feeling the motion of my blood flow through my every limb, the soft rhythm of my heart, even down to the nature around me

There was something there, it was weak, but a fraction of something different was stirring in my new body, could that have been magic? Opening my eyes, I noted how a thick layer of dark clouds rolled in from above, marking the end of my meditation, but I did notice the feeling I had, the presence of something far less human. Moving past that, there was something else that still had me confused.

Looking down, I held up the ring again, a ring of immeasurable power in the palm of my hand, or hoof, I guess. Gambit never told me who was after them too or how I'd even find them, sure, this ring will lead me to the others, but how? Did it glow when sensing another? What about the bad guy who has one, what then? Too little information, and of course, I lacked any combat skill stuck in the body of a female quadruple. At least I had a cape to keep me somewhat dry for when -

*Dropp-Dropp*

-Nevermind, rain's begun, sadly no hood came with this minor accessory. Shaking my now damp head, I decided to start walking in the direction I saw the village, here's hoping I find someplace to stay, even under a bridge is fine, I just need to find a place to hunker down from the day until the rain clears, thank you pegasai, and yes, I am aware they can control the literal force of mother nature, my sisters beat that into me last time as 'The Law of Their Universe'. I swear those two are scary smart, bloody demons.

...

Ruby...Seras, I hope you two are okay. If anything was listening under the rain hitting my form or the surrounding area, I'd have been whispering to myself, it was common for me to sing for them, God knows I hate doing it in front of others, but for them, heh, they'd love it, gave me more confidence despite my insistence not to bother me. I left them without any warning, gone in a literal flash of light and metal, and yet here I was, still alive and kicking in a body they'd laugh at, I'd do the same if it were one of them to be fair, how I already missed their laughs...

"I'm a terrible person." Kicking the dirt I walked along, I watched the stone roll through the rain and towards a steep slope, and that same slope continued in both directions, great, more luck. Then a larger than normal raindrop hit me square on the head, and I merely watched in bemusement at the droplet sliding down past my muzzle. "Thanks for noting my words, Universe."

*Snap*

Something is following me. Now, any normal idiot would assume it to be a small creature of these woods. Me? I'm betting it's a wolf, and not just a simple grey wolf, oh no, I have a hunch this is either a variant of those Timberwolves or a larger than life wolf that I tragically stumbled into. Turning back around I noted that nothing was moving, only the patter of rain on the floor and roof of the forest was heard, this was bad, it's masking the wolf's movements.

...

...

There! Turning to my right, I came to see a withered log of a tree, where the white claws dug into the wood, scratching the surface. It was similar to that of a Timberwolf, only it's leaves were glossy and the wood a little less pale, its eyes were an ice blue too, but other than that, it was as exciting to see such a majestic hunter, and equally as terrifying since I was currently cut off to my left and middle by two more joining the other, I didn't even see them move up.

"Cleaver girl." Heh, one last joke before I die, it didn't help that I was freezing under the constant bombardment of rain. The first Timberwolf lowered its body, climbing slowly over the log and towards me, bearing its fangs

*Snarl*

"Umm...hi, how are you this fine...wet day?" Was I sweating? I probably was, my back was to a steep slope, and that village was at least a good sprint away. I have three wolves ready to chew me to pieces and they've lived as four-legged creatures since the day they existed, I have only about thirty minutes of that same experience, my odds weren't looking too high

Yet with their piercing eyes narrowed with hunger at my defenseless form, something in me stirred. I was going to be mauled to death by a pack of wolves, after...spending all that time in a black abyss, I finally got the chance to live again, aside from the horrific form I took, I was alive, breathing, moving, feeling...I grinned, the rain forcing my mane to stick to my face, but I smiled in it's cold feeling to my fur.

"You want to kill me?" I looked behind me, then back to the wolves with a daring look of a madman. "Come and catch me." I slipped

My body was sent flying down the now muddy slope on all fours, gravity was threating to throw me headfirst into the ground, but I leaned back, feeling my hooves crisscross, and my anxiety grew at the sight of the bottom, I didn't have a plan to stop so this would be a painful landing, say for the shadow looming over me, forcing my hooves to lurch back, pushing up painfully to launch me haphazardly into the ground, avoiding the jaw of a Timberwolf, its own body crashing into a tree. But my hooves felt like jelly from that painful jump, even as I scrambled back to my hooves I felt my back leg shoot with a fiery discomfort.

I spent no time in learning to run before I could walk since that same Timberwolf from before leaped across from the right, nearly catching me with its teeth and claws, neither of which sounded pleasant to be scave by. Not wanting to slow down despite the shoot sensation in my leg, I used the muddy dirt to slide across to my left, pushing my front hooves against a tree to propel me towards the direction of the village, obviously, I heard a large crash from wherever the wolf ended up.

GAH!

My vision spun for a moment, ending in only a sharp stab to my nerves from hitting a tree, a second Timberwolf had caught me off guard and it didn't waste its opportunity in attempting to gut me on the spot. I grunted, pushing myself into a roll so that the wolf luckily crashed right into another, and like any hungry beast, the two started to fight over me, I'd be flattered if not for the fact they were going to tear me apart if I didn't keep running.

The clearing wasn't far now, I just needed to push myself a little farther, come on! The pressure building in my chest was unbearable, I've only been running on adrenaline as well as breathing through my nose and out mouth to keep my breathing stable, but it was difficult to do when your life was on the line. Yet that small opening that gave me a taste, a sweet sensation of achievement was quickly overcome with dread. The third Timberwolf was waiting ahead of me, and that dread was slowly splicing with fear of my demise and other thoughts best left unsaid.

Ok then, how would 'you' get past something that's clearly blocking your way?

Easy, we're in a forest, right?

Get to the point wiseass.

Ugh, look, something like this in a game means that if something is blocking our only way through, so usually it wants you to...

"Look up." If I made it out of this and Equestria alive, I'm going to love Ruby with every fiber of my being. I quickly shot my head upwards to peer at the trees above the Timberwolf, who's tongue trailed across its wooden, rotten teeth. But above it, I felt an idea rush to the forefront of my mind

An old tree was lodged against a branch.

If I could destabilize the branch, the log would crush it and possibly block any others from following me. I only had a single shot at this, no 'Retry', I needed to time this perfectly and yet I was smiling, for once I loved the rain and all its mud making glory. The Timberwolf ran towards me, mud flying across in its wake, while my own muddy hooves did the same, the distance between us both was closing in a matter of seconds, and after a split-second glance, the Timberwolf passed the tree branch.

I fell backward, slide across on my back and cape, despite the frigid cold ground, the Timberwolf had tried to pounce on me, I planted my elbows in the dirt, pulling my back legs towards my stomach, and I was surprisingly flexible, then with a heave, I pushed my lower body up, my back hooves breaking the wood hide of the Timberwolf with a powerful crunch, and the wolf ascended as I passed under it, watching the form of the creature crash against the branch and fall helplessly to the ground again.

I finally stopped sliding, turning myself over to see that the wolf had done the same, shaking its body clean of dirt and rain, other than that, it was probably time to run. Growling angrily towards me, I watched the illuminating eyes turn towards me, yet that was all I saw before a large shadow had completely crushed the entirety of the Timberwolf, shaking the ground from the impact the massive, old tree made, and under it was the wolf, finally shattered into splinters.

"Not murder if it can regenerate." I shrugged to no one, yet two sets of eyes watched me from afar, taking that as a fantasic sign to run, I turned on my hooves and sprinted out of the woods and towards the village over the grassy hill, the rain not much of a problem anymore since I felt numb all over and sections of my body screamed in agony, my adreadline finally running its course and leaving me weak and annoyed. "I'm the best human in Equestria, who needs superpowers when good ol' game logic can be applied in a cartoon world?"

Sensing that no-one was around, I steadily made my way onto the road, the thoughts from when I arrived crashing back in a huge wave of anger, forcing me to kick another stone against a barrel, the streets were empty, and I couldn't see anywhere looking like an inn, only medieval homes and endless streets of emptiness, it was almost scary how scarce the streets were, but it was raining, and I bet only the market was busy, and from where I was, I must have been nearby, this place isn't huge.

"Great, stuck in a world of ponies, magic, and friendship. Stuck doing a job for a crazy jack o' lantern-looking guy. I'm wet, cold, in pain, and in the body of a gir- ahh, my voice is so annoying!" I screamed out in frustration over my own monologue, stomping a right hoof into the ground, only to be hit with dirty water, making my shoulders droop. "I just want a place to sit that's dry..."

As if my prayer was answered by some unseen force, I looked to see the streets all intersect at a massive...bar? Bakery? Well, it didn't matter, the sign said it was open and that was enough for my legs to push a little faster towards the sign of good fortune, a true reward after all that Gambit just put me through. Without delay, I reached the door and slowly pushed the door open, feeling a sweet, savoring smell of sweets reach my damp nose, and I already felt content with this place.

"Finally." I breathed, pushing the door closed behind me, much to my relief, not a soul was in sight, just whoever was busy making the treats of Gods in the back and myself. Feeling a ghost of a smile creep onto my muzzle, I moved for a stool on a bar stand next to a display case, but I didn't dare to look, in fear I'd cause my stomach to grow greedy for food

Moving the stool around, I hopped onto the seat, my entire body dripping from head to toe, I didn't want to get the floor and seat wet, but I just needed a minute to regain my senses, I was nearly devoured like a treat to a dog, slowly, my head collapsed to the table, and I felt my mind drift to my thoughts of this predicament of mine.

"Just let it die (go to the light)" And now we're all caught up on my painful day of misery and unforgiving misfortune, if I could be bothered to cry, I would because it was honestly the only way to rid myself of any emotional frustrations I had now.

If I were to make it home, I needed to find those ring, I had to...I can't even begin to wonder how they all felt, I didn't see myself as anything more than a man in the background, but to them I was...everything, they'd tell me this and I'd be passive about it, never once wanting to accept it, only acknowledge them that I see that, it was enough for me just to be happy around them...now? Gods...dammit...

"Hey, you're singing it really good!" Was someone, or in this world, somepony, talking to me? Well, I guess that since I was the only one here it must have been the baker. Lifting my wet head, I came eye-to-eye with...well I'll be damned. "You okay?"

Pink, poofy mane and tail, pink coat, brilliant ocean blue eyes and a smile that never fades, Pinkie Pie, she was...actually before my eyes, the Element of Laughter herself, and much to my sisters' dumbfounded expressions, was actually my favorite of the group. She had a funny way of seeing reality, never once letting darkness seep through, guess being sent to this world broke that barrier for me. But yeah, I like her way of thinking.

"I'm...well I don't know, what's your take on my image?" I dryly muttered, my throat was like sandpaper. For a moment Pinkie put a hoof to her chin, then raised it high with a smile

"You've had a really bad day, but then that bad day became like suuuuper worse, only to be slapped with a little more doom and gloom, followed by a bitter-sweet release!" Yep, this really is Pinkie Pie. I did manage a small laugh at that, coughing slightly. "Oh sorry, here, on the house!" To my throat's relief, Pinkie sat a small glass of water before me, and I graciously accepted it

"Thanks." Ahh...much better, despite how cold I was, just being able to feel my throat loosen again was a clear sign of relief for me, but I noticed that she was still looking at me with curious eyes, clearing my throat, I sat the glass down, how my hoof was an Omni-magnet for objects made no sense, but the heck with it, magic. "Name's Dimitri."

"Well, I'm Pinkie Pie! The Greatest Party Planner in Ponyville and happy to help! Soooo, what brings a stranger from the east here?" Is that where I am from? Wait, she - Pinkie the Fourth Wall Breaker, forgot. "Are you a nomad? Warrior? Secreting an unknown Princess on the run? A Bad guy?"

"Maybe. No. Don't have wings. Depends on how you view someone who's chaotically good." I answered vaguely, and I felt my side jolt from the mare teleporting to my left, poking my side

"Nope, no wings, claws, creepy magic. Yay, new a new friend!" I didn't respond, only blinking at the sudden changes Pinkie went through, from kind, to suspicious, to curious, and now to friendliness

"You have a strange way of greeting, don't you?" She only giggled

"Yep, what's a life without a little crazy?" Okay, maybe being stuck here won't be such a bad thing so long as I stick with this chick for the remainder of my time. Suddenly She floated in the air, gasping in shock at me. "You're completely soaked, wait right here and don't move, ante Pinkie will save you from the cold!" And she was gone again in a trail of pink

"Did she really only notice I was soaking now?"

"Yep!" GAH! I completely fell off the stool and onto the cold wood below, where Pinkie sat on the other stool behind where I had turned. "How the hell did you do that?"

"I walked."

...

...

"Sure is empty today, huh?" Way to break the ice over the obvious, Pinkie. I stood up again, seeing her hold out a towel for me, and I took it slowly, seeing her give a more normal, warm smile, something of that of a friend would give

"I...you have officially made my day more bearable, Pinkie, thank you, again." I may be stuck like this, and I may hate it with every fiber of my being, but I had a chance to get home, and that chance can only come to me if I learn to adapt, I can do this, I just needed to find the rings before whoever else is out there does, I have one, six more to go

"Hehehe, welcome to Ponyville!"

Heh, Welcome to the start of a thrilling time in the magical land of Equestria.

To Be Continued...

Silent Slender Presents...

[Beyond Our Souls: Red]

[Opening: Learning To Fly]

Author's Note

This is a single chapter publish, just to see if it does well or if you like the concept. Other than that, hope you enjoyed, seeya if I make the next chapter!

Next Chapter: I Feel Like A Wet Noodle
Like...a wet noodle is boring. So I'm bored, that's what I'm trying to say, well I would if I wasn't be bothered every pony in this town!

Warlocks Go Floof

...You Shall...Drift...

...You Are Alone...

...The Blood...The Wolf...Will Consume...

"Ugh...ominous warning is...zzZZZzz...ominous..."

You know that emptiness that sometimes clouds your mind? The soft ringing in one ear once you wake from something...off, like you can feel something bad has or will happen, misfortune is a looming factor in the back of your drifting mind. I sat there, staring up at the ceiling of wood with the longest time, I didn't have my phone because I lacked any form of technology in this land, I sat there, my hair a messier mess, my eyes crusty and my throat barren. With a groggy yawn, my joints popped with a nice sigh of relief.

"Welcome to another thrilling day in Equestria." It had been four days, ninety-six hours or so since I was pelted to the tarmac by a banana bus, talked with what could possibly be a demon, woke up a mare in this world's terms, and now I'm here in the pastel-colored world of actually better beings than Earth. Then again, this is a kid's show to a degree, depending on how the Multiverse mingled with this one

It didn't take long for my zombie-like ass to move from my room to the bathroom to have a shower, another plus I guess, I don't have any clothing so less hassle, despite fur being annoying to dry. Once I felt the warmth of the water grace my body I melted away again into my subconscious, mindlessly standing under the showerhead, pondering.

Magic. The fundamental concept of this reality, from what I gathered there are only four beings capable of magic like spells and arcane. Unicorns. Alicorns. Changelings and Discord. The two former were the easiest ones to understand and mimic, Changelings were similar only their magic was weaker and focused more on deception and stealth. Discord was a whole 'nother level of power, a being with power over Chaos itself, if I live long enough to reach that point of the show I'm so speeding is reforming along, he was another favorite of mine, mainly due to his fourth wall breaking, reality manipulation, and fun personality, like Spike, I look forward to meeting him if I get the chance.

I stood there for a while not trying to put together any sort of convoluted plan for today. Get ready for work, leave at noon to request an outfit of my own design, come back and continue to work until closing. I had about...maybe two weeks before I've grown accustomed to this world, meaning this reality will begin to integrate events towards me to compensate, and I doubt the thing I'm after will be too happy about a human wrench in the way of collecting the rings, so most likely it'll send someone after me, gotta keep that in mind.

After a few more minutes to sigh among the warmth of the water, I slowly reached to twist the valve back and step out, grabbing a towel to quickly dry myself to the point I felt and looked less like someone had rubbed a balloon across my body. Stepping towards the mirror to scowl at my...female reflection, I felt my crimson eyes stare right back at me with just as much escalating disdain.

"Another day in the magical land of Equestria, Dimitri, hope you're ready for just about every level of despair." Not expecting my reflection to comment back, I rubbed a hoof through my mane, quickly making the chaos that was my hair more presentable, and yes, I am aware I switch between hair and mane, there is no difference it's still hair by universal terms. Still...

Placing my hoof on the mirror, If I had my fingers they've been clenched tightly into my palm, along with a cold shiver up my spine when I breathed heavily for a moment. I swear I'm going to gather these rings, even if I have to spend years in this body, I'm going to get my wish home. Removing my hoof, I walked back towards the door, leaving with a small whisper to nothing, maybe I was just hopelessly praying they'd hear me.

"I promise I'll come home."

"Yo, Pinkie, where you need this?" I spoke clearly with the large bag of sugar on my back, I'll admit it, being stuck as a Kitchen Porter for a few years pays off. The majority of my time under this employment had me doing odd jobs and shadowing whatever Pinkie or the Cakes had me do, so long as I could do it without the use of a horn until I could manage levitation I was as useless as a human

With a quick turn, throwing an assortment of ingredients into the bowl behind her, she pointed the tip of her mane towards the container to her left, without a word I moved past her with a bemused expression, the amount of contrast collected between us could be felt for miles at this rate. I was by no means complaining, I just happen to have a very agitated expression when I'm not talking or daydreaming.

"Hey, Dimi, your assistance is required!" Turning back to the energetic pony, I saw her pointing to the mixing bowl resting on the counter. "Stir this with all your might, I got cookies in need of tasting!"

"...Sure." Shrugging, I moved to take her place as I once more broke the laws of the universe and grasp the wooden spoon my hand, moving it within a clockwise motion, the batter slowly requiring me to apply more pressure with my curved hoof, meanwhile I felt my nose succumb to the sweet, freshly baked smell of cookies...hmm...melted chocolate inside with some solid chips on top...milk chocolate too. "Smells pretty good, Pinkie."

"Yep! Made with lots of love and sugar!" Without looking at her I could imagine her happily hopping on the spot. After only a few more seconds the mixture of ingredients was completely turned a pasty peach color, and I felt my muscle relax again. "Thank you so much, Dimi~!"

Still getting over that nickname. "It's...really nothing, I just stirred everything together, not like I baked a masterpiece." I looked to find said pinkie pony before me with a small sample of the cookies, and I felt my eyes draw themselves towards the dark treat with eager intent. With a simple flick of the cookie from her hoof to my own, I smiled. "But I won't refuse a sweet reward."

"Uh-uh, you totally helped, if you hadn't have put so much force into mixing some of the ingredients might not have merged, or to much could make it all runny." Huh...guess when it comes down to baking she's smarter than she looks, guess her optimistic outlook can still throw me. "Do you like baking?"

"Umm...well only when I had the time to do so." Moving back to clear some dirty dishes from her station I continued. "I and my sisters would-"

"You have sisters too!?" I was immediately pulled to stare back at her wide eyes, but I shook my head and pushed her away from my muzzle to allow my personal bubble to form again

"Aye, Ruby and Seras." I didn't realize it but I was beginning to smile at the memory of us attempting to keep the kitchen clean that one time during summer. "We made a complete mess of the place, even though we tried really hard not to, hehehe, it was really bad."

"Hey, you smiled again!" What? I saw Pinkie looking up from a recipe book with an honest smile on her face. "I've never seen you so happy before, but I get really happy too when I talk about my sisters."

...Bloody rats made me miss them...not that I was complaining. Rubbing my mane I went back to work

"That's what happens when you miss family, you talk about them and...I guess its like they're right next to you again or something." With that said I returned to cleaning the place up some more, a small breath of silence filling the air again besides the clanking of objects

"You can bake too if you want?" I stopped what I was doing to hear her again. "Cakes, muffins, cupcakes, cookies, anything, just say the word and I'll make you the greatest baker in all of Equestria!"

"You...really would do that for me?" A mixture of uncertainty and interest had built in my chest again, the answer was uncertain too. But looking at her batter-covered face, that innocent smile and determined flare in her eyes, she truly was honest about it, even if she can't stop bouncing to say it directly.

"Well duh, you're one of my best friends now."

Best...Friend...

Sudden elation returning from the abyss. And with a thought chosen, I grinned. "No promises I'd keep this place clean." Pinkie just giggled, flicking the spoon to smack me with a spot of batter on my face, which was promptly licked clean with a small buzz of energy to my body

"I want to see this entire kitchen coated when we're done, Dimi!"

"Heh, aye sir."

I don't want to do this.

Why am I here? What reason do I - Oh, right, I needed equipment...

"You know it won't be that bad, right?" Again, the convenience of meeting both the infuriating fashion designer, as well as have the oblivious Twilight with me is bound to cause my brain cells to commit to mass genocide, I can hear the crusade now. Praise the Sun! I gave her a knowing look of anguish, forcing the mare to look at me nervously. "R-Right, you...both didn't see eye-to-eye all that well last time."

"I'd say something sarcastic, but its too easy," I replied, rubbing my mane as we approached the door to the rather elegant building, despite who dwelled inside like a slumbering dragon awaiting to toss me into her treasury like a prize, the aesthetics of the building were well-thought out. "If not for the fact I have to place an order, at least the place looks pristine."

"I know right? When I came to Ponyville I never knew they constructed buildings like this either, not that its a bad thing, only that it looks as though it came from Canterlot." Well, she's got a point there, it's also deceptive. "Oh, and Dimitri?"

"Aye?" Not looking at her I kept my eyes to the door now meters from us, my impending jump into the abyss adding to the pressure in my stomach, I'd rather fight Artorias on a dance mat than this

"I wanted to apologize still for how I laughed at you a few days ago." I stopped to give her an inquisitive brow, my frown probably didn't help though but if I tried to smile forcefully I'd look like I was in pain...

I was.

I raised my hoof up to stop her again. "You already apologized, and as I say to everyone I don't expect anyone to understand what goes on in my head, despite how I look on the outside, so unless you want me to feel guilty, drop it."

"R-Right," She then gave me a soft smile. "Thank you, Dimitri."

"Heh, don't thank me yet, I might just kill your friend if she tries to force me into a dress." I may be in this...ugh, body, but my mind is NOT being altered in anyway, I made that notion clear with Gambit a while ago, if anything I have many windows of opportunity to dive out of

*Knock-Knock-Knock*

"I am so sorry for whatever Deity I have upset," I whispered a final goodbye as the door swung open, and I saw the casual smile of Rarity perk up at mine and Twilight's appearance. "Sup."

"Dimitri and Twilight! Perfect timing the both of you, come in." Waving us in I slowly made my way inside, viewing the many stands with...gulp, mannequin...or mareicanes? No that sounds like something else...hmm, what the hell was this world's version of these creepy, lifeless statues? "I have just begun a new design for the Galla and I insisted you'd come to be a...assisstant, Twilight, since you grew up in Canterlot, maybe you can give your own professional opinion on the matter?"

"Well, sure I can try, but fashion isn't my area of expertise." Neither is your tact, Twi, but I lack that too. Taking my time to admire her handiwork in each design, how well-thought-out and carefully executed her plans where made mine pale in comparison. I may not want to be anywhere within a mile of a dress, but I can admire great care and work when I see it. "Dimitri, you said you had plans for Rarity, right?"

"That I do." With a soft grumble, I removed the small notepad from the hidden pouch in my cape to give her, flicking to the right page with the designs. To my surprise she grasped the book in her magic, taking a closer look at my sketched designs, most of which were drawn by Pinkie since I lacked any capable use to write with hooves...it took longer than expected. "I wanted to see if you could manufacture these designs of mine, I don't really care how long they take, just so long as you follow them. To. The. Letter."

"Well...these designs, darling, they...umm, how should I put it?" Rarity was going to insult me again, that look said it all because it's not 'Lady-Like' or something like that. Twilight looked more interested than confused though. "I dare say these designs are-"

"Fascinating." The sudden field of magic shifted to a light purple one, and Twilight started to analyze the pages before us, myself rubbing my hooves together shyly, I don't handle judgment on drawings of mine well, that linger rejection feeling was very real and very ominous. "Hidden zips for items or metal plates, extra carrying capacity, lightweight materials but sturdy against weather and burns, not to mention a very...roguish style."

"I, well...I am a Hunter after-all, kind-of the reason to be prepared." It was a half-lie, I wasn't a Hunter IRL, but they don't know that, and I want to stroke my ego some more, besides with these rings I could have the capability of being a Hunter too. I glanced again to my...flank, I hate these terms, seeing the mark embedded on the side, six parallelograms forming a triangle. Yeah, another thing I liked about this body, I had the mark of the Hunter Vanguard on my ass, I'm gonna wear it proud

"This is by far the strangest order I've received, and while I don't find the style to be...fitting, I can see how much this means to you darling, so yes, I can have this tailored to you." Score! "On one condition." Noooooo. "You must allow me to use your measurements to design a dress for you!"

"I would rather die." Doing my best Kevin Hart Impression I snatched the book from Twilight's magic, fascinated by the fact I couldn't feel any resistance when I did

"I insist you let me, with your snow-white color, and your mane!” She patted it with her hooves. I found this to be very odd...but I couldn't move towards the door, not when they had magic, damn. She clicked her tongue in disappointment though. “Such a strange style too, and yet you haven’t taken care of it at all.” She shook her head, I pushed her back softly, glaring daggers at her

"I came here to make an order, not play dress-up. I hate dresses, and as I told you last time, I am extremely self-conscious about my mane and what others do to it." My tone made her take a step back, just as I breathed out my nose with an angry sigh. "You can tailor me a suit, but that is as far as I'll go."

"Well, I-" I stopped her again, Twilight watching from a reasonable distance

"Rarity. Dimitri isn't like any girl we know, not even Rainbow Dash is this adamant about a dress." Got that right - wait..is she calling me a tomboy? Oh My Gods, I am a tomboy. Both looked at me with strange looks as I put the notebook on a table. "She seems to hate having anyone force her into doing something she hasn't or doesn't like trying."

"Got that right," I answered her, my irritation slowly dying out. "While I can see where you're coming from, Rarity, I am someone who is, by no stretch of the imagination, a pain to all I encompass."

"...That's quite alright dear. I understand, although I would try to avoid such a hostile reaction next time.” Her eyes lit up suddenly and a massive, open-mouth smile stretched across her face. “IDEA!"

"Wait what? Hold up you banshee!" I didn't have time to acknowledge her sudden change in attitude, as I was pulled towards a stand in her magical grasp. "Ahh, magic, noooo!"

"Relax,” Twilight soothed. “She has an idea for you."

"I've got the idea for a perfect outfit alongside your custom order!” Rarity dragged me to what was evidently a measuring stand and placed me on a pedestal. I dropped my head and growled in frustration. I signed my soul off and made my bed with my order. Time to lay in it

I was tired now, but at least I now have a way to break this awkward silence that had consumed me for ten minutes as Rarity poked and prodded me with a measuring tape. I'd give her credit, she was in full professional mode now, something I can respect. The two best unicorns I know where currently before my eyes, keyword being 'Unicorns'.

"Yo, Twilight, how do I use this blasted horn of mine?" That sounded wrong, the fact I know it sounds wrong makes me worse. Looking up from my notebook that I held to keep my notes, I let her glance through some pages

"Right, you said you've never used magic before." I nodded, straightening again to allow the tape to graze my neck. "Well, what do you know? What knowledge you have on magic can help me see where I can begin."

"Right. Magic is a construct of Ether, the energy that everything is made of, Magic, Arcane, Dark, Holy, everything that can conjure something from nothing is magic, and magic is Ether." I explained with what I knew of this world and from reading. "My horn acts like a staff or wand, channeling magic stored within me as projecting it out using either spoken incantations or methods stored in memory, the latter being easier."

"That...actually all correct, I'm impressed!" Don't patronize me, mare. "You need to have a clear goal in mind when conjuring magic. Picture what you wish to do to the world around you or what you can do with just your hoof. Like grabbing an object." I see, so I was close

Closing my eyes I focused on envisioning my notebook in Twilight's hooves, my own, real human hands grasping the edge and pulling it from her soft grip...okay, beginning to strain my brain here. Calm thoughts Dimitri, just carefully imagine grasping the book softly like her, feel your fingers coil around the two edges, then pull.

Opening my eyes, I noted that I was still facing Twilight with a bemused expression, but her own face was that of amazement and a tint of pride.

"For someone claiming to never use magic." I too was smiling as she spoke to me, I felt my heart race at the sight of a royal red tint that made my hair illuminate. "You sure have an easy time understand it."

I pulled my notebook towards my face, the cover held tightly in a red aura that shimmered before me and Rarity

"Great work, Dimitri." Rarity praised me too, and I felt my awkwardness emerge

"Y-yeah...thanks...both of you."

Does this make me Gandalf now?

To Be Continued...

Author's Note

At this rate, I doubt Dimitri will survive Rarity long enough to gather two rings, let alone the others. Touching and insightful events into who Dimitri is, hope you enjoyed, seeya in the next chapter!

Next Chapter: Fruity Behavior
Ok, either I truly lost my mental stability back in that void or someone is following me ever since I procured this collection of fruit, what I don't get is why.

Fruity Behavior

"Dimi~!" Turning my head from the display, I looked through my mane towards Pinkie, her head propped between the door and the frame with a creepy smile. "We're out of bananas and Mangos!"

"...Oddly specific." I muttered, pulling the door from between her head so that she could fish out a list from her mane, alongside a small pouch of Bits, cannot wait for my order to be made so I can actually carry these properly, but I pushed it into my rag of a cape and gave her a nod. "Be back shortly."

"Thank yoooou." She slammed the kitchen door and I rubbed my mane, turning to leave the dozen or so ponies that chatted away, not minding my existence as I intended it, a mutual agreement to leave me be, because I swear, the day someone decides to hit on me will be the day I lose my grip on sanity and go straight for the throat. So if I keep my usual stare that gives Death a shiver I'm sure I'll be fine

It had been well over a week...maybe two? Since I arrived here, and to be honest I'm finding it to be okay, I'm more than astonished Pinkie and the Cakes were accepting to a stranger from nowhere, but I won't take it for granted or abuse their charity, I do see myself under the morality of chaotic good, doesn't mean I won't say my thanks where it's needed. Bloody owe them my life for this. I also have a slightly better hold on levitation magic, while I can't do it for long or lift heavy objects, it does help me where I lack fingers, like say, for grabbing a selection of fruits?

"I am the new Warlock Hunter, all shall fear my laser horn." Hehehehe, love it

"Hey, Dimitri!" Huh, oh, my scaly friend. For once, a ghostly smile reached my lips as I gave him a small salute

"At ease my solider." He grinned and saluted back, walking out of Sugarcube Corner with me. "What can I aid you in? For a price of course."

"How about telling me more about...Fireteam Horizon?" Ah, no surprises. I did chuckle at that, but I rolled my eyes and moved my head to stare at him eye-to-eye

"For. A. Price." Come now buddy, you know the rules of my trade. He winced, trying to think of something to say, his claws fumbling in his palms

"I-uhh. You're...the greatest, most amazing pony ever, and I'd be lost without you?" I burst into a fit of maniacal laughter at that, not minding the looks some ponies gave us as I rubbed the top of his head

"You know it. Still, keep those lines up and you may just get a girl in no time." I grinned, seeing him pick himself up again, then I flicked his nose. "So long as you don't pull yours moves on me, we'll be grand."

He nearly tripped as his cheeks turned a small shade of red. "W-what, no, course not, seriously dude, even I'm not that crazy."

"I have yet to make a Hunter of you yet, my scaly friend, count on it." With a smile, I pointed to the sun above. "Okay...so there they were, beaten and burned among the small army of Fallen, their weapons humming to life with crackling arc, as their God rose high, scarred and alit with dark purple fluctuations of ether. Ceres was the only one to feel her fire rise in her blood, while Zane and Morbin slowly raised their weapons side-by-side with each other."

"This is getting good!" You have no idea, Spike

[??? POV]

She looks nice, her mane is like mine and her...lizard? I think that's what that is, he looks nice too, maybe he's like those lizards that spit fire? Hmm...fire...warmth...

"-Yeah, mate, some bananas and...a mango, if you would be so kind?" Pretty pony is getting...*gasp*...a-a mango~!

I tried to keep myself from drooling atop the roof I sat on, watching as the mean pony from before handed her the fruit...wait...what's that gold thing she gave him? Did I need that too? But...I don't have shiny stuff, I'm not a magpie. Am I a magpie? Well, I don't find shiny things and take them, so no, I'm not. Ahh~ Where'd they go!? Ugh...ah, there!

Eek! I quickly jumped into the shadow of a building, hopefully, she didn't see me.

"What's up, Dimitri?" Di...mi..tri...?

"..." She was looking where I was, did she see me? "Meh, thought I saw something."

"I think you need to get outside more."

"You want to hear the rest of my story or not?" The pretty pony...Dimi...tri, she gave the lizard a funny look as he panicked, it was sort of funny to watch

"...Pff, that's low and you know it."

"I know, but its working, ain't it?" Gah, must pursue the tasty fruit!

[Dimitri's POV]

Okay, felt that massive chill as if someone was watching me, it kept vanishing every time though...hmm, if I could use levitation, maybe I can levitate their bones out of place when I caught them, a dislocated shoulder wouldn't hurt. Stepping just inside of Sugarcube Corner, I turned back to the streets to glance at my blindspots, poking my head up to the roof for any sign of another spy.

"You okay?" Huh? Shrugging, I closed the door behind us, just as my crimson magic hue floated the fruit through the air, placing the bag with the bananas down first. "You keep looking back every ten seconds."

"Never hurts to keep on alert, Spike, believe me, it can save your hide." I levitated the mango next, my eyes glaring at the sight of the round fruit in my magical grasp. "Honestly, I keep feeling like something is watching me, it's gone from unnerving to aggravating."

"Sure you're not going crazy being stuck in the same room as Pinkie?" Hey! She's not that - well that could be it, but surprisingly she's rather tame about entering my room, so all things considered it might just be my own solitude, only really had Pinkie and Spike as friends here, Twilight maybe, Applejack and Rarity are pushing it, but Applejack more due to her annoying lie-detection, seriously, take a hint sometimes, Dash could work and Fluttershy is harmless too

"Maybe..." I was proven wrong in a microsecond

*Swoop-Crash-Nom*

"GAH!!!" We both yelled as Spike latched himself to my neck as if he were glue, while I fell backward from the sudden shadow piercing my magic and swiping the Mango from before our pinprick eyes, our bodies crashing into the wall and next to a barrel at the sight of something tearing into the mango in seconds like a feral beast

To mine and Spike's surprise, not to the fact that we were holding each other Scooby Doo style, the mango was gone, only a satisfied smile on the fanged pony's lips as she licked them clean, followed by a small burp. It was one of those 'Bat Ponies'? Her coat was a dark grey, with the universal purple mane that had a messy look to it, but hers looked...unkempt like she hadn't combed it in weeks, hell, she made my hair look pristine. Her eyes a brilliant ice-blue. Now she sat on her haunches facing us both directly with a happy smile.

"Umm...what just happened?" I asked Spike, putting the dragon down as we slowly inched towards her, she didn't react, only her tail happily moving in tangent with her innocent smile. Slowly though, she stood up and approached Spike, myself behind my meat shield encase things went south

"H-Hey, Dimitri!" I just pushed him forwards, smiling a little at his sacrifice

"I will honor your name, Spike, good luck." Quickly, I dived behind a barrel to watch them interact. Spike stood still as she stopped before him, not uttering a word as she came muzzle-to-face with him, Spike being like any guy, turned red at the close proximity with the mare who blinked at him with fascination, before moving to sit down in front of him and reach out. "It can smell fear, be wary my sweet prince!" I whispered to him

"I-Uhh...what do I do?" Spike freaked out on the spot, only to freeze as her hooves wrapped around him tightly, her head against his chest with a soft sigh...wait, Spike's a dragon, dragons have fire sacs in their bodies - Oooooh, I get it now. Moving from behind the barrel, I stepped towards the two, the Bat Pony softly breathing as she kept her head to his chest, while Spike's face was beet red and my coy smile didn't help

"Seems you have a new friend, Spike. She must have been looking for something to eat and warmth, we just happened to be unfortunate enough to have both." I shrugged calmly, sitting down beside him as I poked the mare, who blinked and looked to me with an innocent stare. "So, you lost or somethin'?"

She nodded with a sad frown. Hmm...

"Are you mute?" Another nod and both myself and Spike gave each-other a knowing look. Well, ahh hell with it, I like these Bat Ponies, they're fun. "You need someplace to stay?" Her ears perked up at that, eyes looking between us. "I mean, it's not like you create a lot of noise, so I doubt you crashing with me will be a problem if you want anyway?"

AHH! Sudden loss of oxygen was apparent as this mare's vice-like grip held me tightly, her smile wide at my suggestion, I mean, sure this place had room, so long as this girl kept a lid on the noise I doubt it'd be a problem. Patting her back tentatively, I felt her move off me to sit before myself and Spike, both of us looking to each other for some formulation of a plan.

"So..."

"So...what's her name?" Ah bugger, that's right. Looking to the Bat Pony again, she blinked at us as she frowned, shaking her head. "You don't have one?" She shook again, okay, teaching her words might help. "Then...can you spell it?" Another shake, and I groaned

"Can you use expressions?" Spike motioned towards her, and soon her eyes lit up. Before us she used her wings to shade herself, resting her head on her hooves as she was sleeping...hmm. "Uh...Nightshade?" She shook her head

"Echo?" Nope, if it was the fanbase would be after my head, heh, they could try. She sighed softly, tapping a hoof to her chin to think of a way to explain it, soon she moved to sit behind me, I suddenly felt her poke my sides, forcing me to jump with a girlish yelp, to which Spike and herself seemed to enjoy, while I felt my cheeks redden at the sound of my voice. "You're a goddamn nightmare, that's what you are..."

Suddenly, she jumped to her hooves, happily nodding with her tail wagging as if she were a dog. Wait...Nightmare...I wonder if...I swear if I turn out to be right on this.

"Your name, it's Merry Nightmare, ain't it?" Another bright nod and a clop of her hooves as I saw Spike look to me with surprise, while I rubbed a hoof against my head with an audible groan at the reference, atleast it lacked a pun. "Why am I not surprised."

"Maybe you're just growing used to it, trust me, you do." For once I'm inclined to agree with my scaly friend, shaking my head as Merry bobbed her head from side-to-side happily. Call me a tad random, but come on, having a literal flying prowler of the night is like the best thing ever, and it can communicate - well, somewhat - so who cares if its another mouth to feed, she seems nice enough."Still, why'd you want to help her? N-not that I'm against helping, just curious?"

"Well..." I held my gaze to her again for a short time, my eyes wandering hers with a strange sense of familiarity, I didn't realize it at first but a felt a sad smile tug at my lips. "She reminds me of Ruby."

"'Ruby'?" Right, I never told him

"One of my younger sisters." I didn't want to say more on the subject, just the thoughts alone filled a pit in my stomach with each second that ticked by

"O-oh, right, sorry."

"Heh, don't be." I rubbed the top of his head with a reassuring grin; looking to Merry, who was watching the small remaining group of ponies in the bakery with equal fascination, obviously, we caused a slight scene. "I think I like her."

Merry looked at us again with an innocent expression, her head tilted to one side as I saluted her playfully, with Spike winking once.

"Welcome to our merry band of Hunters, Merry."

To Be Continued...

Author's Note

You know if I could, I'd change my middle name to 'Inconsistent' because that would accurately describe me, but hey, Iestyn's fine. Anywho, a new character and she's adorable! Also the phrase 'My Sweet Prince' is something Dimitri calls any guy in her small circle of friends. Hope you enjoyed, seeya in the next chapter!

Next Chapter: Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird Apparently

Dimitri finds herself dealing with the ego of Rainbow who is nervous about perfecting her Sonic Rainboom, with a little attitude from Dimitri she may just have the determination to pull it off. Meanwhile, Dimitri handles more problems about being a girl when she tags alongside the Mane 6 and Spike.

I Feel Like A Wet Noodle

"Dimiiiiitriiiii."

"Dimiiiitriiiii."

"Dimi - Would you wake up!"

"Gah!" Face meet floor, hi floor, a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I groaned under the muffled collection of sheets and finely sanded floorboards, I had fallen out of the comfort of sleep and found myself slightly tangled up if that wasn't obvious. A simple turn and I was wiggling myself free due to the lack of hands, arms...human body that I lacked, yeah, I'm not playing the dumb card. "Oh, was it all just a dream? No. If I 'WAS' a dream, why does my body feel like a bus ran over it!?"

Snorting at that statement, I cringed at the sound of my own, girlish voice, the only prospect of its good use is that I wasn't so high-pitched that glass would shatter on contact with the sound waves. I do remember that I was in a guest room...at Sugarcube Corner...hmm, could be worse, but given that Pinkie of all ponies happened to be here, helped me out yesterday, and the owners were nice enough to let me stay, I wasn't going to complain in the slightest. Look, don't get me wrong, I hate borrowing from people I can't pay back, but considering that it was raining all day and night, I was still cold, a few bumps and scrapes that could get infected too, any sane person with half a brain cell could say it was stupid not to accept. That, and they were very insistent.

"Good to know you're not an 'Oh I won't accept help because then I'll be used by those around me for their own gains'." I suddenly jumped back from nothing, my dumbfounded expression clear from the mirror before me. "I swear, those guys can just die for all I care, I have standers of my own, but help is help whether or not you have the capability to view such in that way."

"G-Gambit?"

"The one and only." His sly reply came out, and I felt a cocky expression rise to me again, but my twitching eyebrow and boiling blood was not as clear as my facial features

"You bloody left me in a forest filled with Timberwolves ready to gut me you slag!" I tried to keep my voice down so as not to wake the people who let me stay here for the night. What? I care little if people think I'm crazy, but I ain't dealing with the awkwardness of being kicked out, that's for sure

"What? That's how most Human in Equestria start, right? Sent to Equestria, wake up in woods, chased out by Timberwolves?" He paused, humming as if the context he described was uncertain to him. "Did they change that since I last checked?"

"Gambit, if you want me to help you get these rings, why did you stick me in the body of a girl!?" I growled and only a light laugh broke the silence in my head, the blood rising to my cheeks as if a group was looking at me directly

"I told, remember? I lost your new body and had to find something useful, this was the only unicorn type I had! If I could just steal ponies away I would." Gambit defended himself. "Believe me I tried."

This was getting me nowhere at subway levels of consistency. "Okay...how do I use this ring without fingers?"

"Straight back to the point, love it!" I was growling at my reflection. "Okay-Okay, the ring I gave you is the White Ring of Bladedance, as I mentioned before, you can summon any weapon you want so long as this Universe has weapons that obey the laws. So tech is out and magic is the new Meta. In order to harness their power you have to assert will over the ring, meaning your strength of heart, spirit, will, all these traits of a person give you the power to master the rings, the more you have, the harder it is."

"Seriously? That sounds like a stupid Ex-Machina." I mean, cool, I now know how to conjure their power if I can't learn magic by then, but why 'Willpower'?

"Because if you lose yourself, if your own soul is brought down to such a low point, you'll be consumed by them." ...

WAIT WHAT!?!

"Woah, that was not part of the deal? I just got a...rather annoying body, doesn't mean I want to die again under some 'One Ring to rule them all' BS!" I snapped in a hushed voice, glaring daggers towards my reflection, those golden eyes staring back was all I could construct. "I got hit by a bus, how ironic is that?"

"Very ironic actually." I scoffed, slamming my head onto the bed to muffle my moan of bewildered defeat by the hands of a madman. If I don't die in this body, these ring will do it for me, one fire pit and into another

"Thank you...for summing that up."

"Here." I raised an ear at the 'chink' of metal in a bag beside me, the thud making my gaze tilt to look at the brown pouch beside me, whatever its contents were had to be something worthwhile to open. "Consider this your 'Starter Kit', or 'Pay to Win' fee."

"If I open it will you stop with the Meta jokes already?" Nothing but a silent answer, sighing with a small smile I used my hoof to pop the buckle off, revealing a shiny collection of golden coins before my eyes, and it was there that my smile grew wider with glee, the sight of glimmering loot had never made this horrid form more enjoyable to be in. "Ooooh, I love it."

"Knew you would, that should fund you for quite some time, given how you have only a ragged cloak to your name and possibly mental problems, I think this will suffice." Gambit sounded far too smug about it, yet once more I pushed that air of caution to the wind in favor of getting my bearings together

"Ok, I'll need a place to rent out, for now, no way do I want to overstay my welcome here, despite how nice the owners are. Getting some clothing is a must, I may be growing accustomed to this 'fur' but a little added protection never hurt anyone before. Maybe a book on magic..." The options of my day were piling up, suddenly I felt a little elated at the prospect of getting this show on the road, but there was one question I still had. "Gambit, why don't you just give me a house? Or the funding for one anyways?"

"Do I look like a piggy bank to you?" I gave the empty room a bemused expression, that lie was far from the worst thing he's done, but even a child could tell he was lying. "Fine. Since some...metamorphic problems have arisen in your current state, I'll give you a reward for every ring you gather, how's that?"

Hmm. "Sure, I'm good with that."

"Cool-Cool, I got things to do better than playing My Little Pony, have fun Dimi~!" Did he just...he called me...I hate him, the guy's strange, slightly helpful, but I hate him. Once this day of mine is through I'll be back to complaining about this form of mine. Oh who am I kidding, I hate this!

Hate. Hate. Hate!

Slowly muttering to myself while trailing down the steps to the bakery, I found that the place had more people than yesterday, guess the rain does put these ponies off, well most of them that is. A few background ponies, but not a sign of any of the main cast or side ones, good, fewer distractions the better for today. While I don't mind a simple 'hello', being dragged into a conversation was not my priority, nor did I need them butting into my list of things to do. Shelter. Clothes. Magic Book. Simple enough.

"Morning, dear." Huh? Raising my head to the voice I noticed that it was...Mrs. Cake? I swear these names will either kill me or remembering them all. She seemed to be working on finer details on a sponge cake, trying to expertly layer the icing on the cake, no pun in intended. Not wanting to be rude, I gave her a small nod of my delirious head

"Mornin'." Moving to sit on the same stool as when I came into this place, I could still feel the cold leather from the night before, it even felt weird because of the sponge inside absorbing the rainwater from me, perfect. Something else bothered me though, the way she was layering the icing, it didn't look right, not that I'm questioning a woman on her talents, just...the colors, they bothered me. "Say, why you using white and red?"

"Oh? Well since Autumn is around the corner I wanted to try a small theme with this cake, just a test to see how it turns out ascetically-wise." Mrs. Cake explained to me, but I held my hoof to my chin in thought, my eyes and mind slowly working back up to full power now

"Try adding a honeycomb color too, make the pattern transition between the different colors like the changing of seasons," I suggested my outlook on her design, this made her stop to ponder on my words before she sat the icing down to look at me curiously. "Red and White remind me of romance or winter, adding a warm shade create a better contrast, but not so much that it's an eyesore."

"That...yes, that it!" Well, I made her happy, mission acomplished, brain. Her warm smile seemed to grow at that fondly and I merely rested my hoof against my cheek with a bored expression. "I think you showing up here is a stroke of good luck, Miss...sorry, I never asked Pinkie or you for your name."

"Aye, it's fine. Name's Dimitri, and also, 'Good Luck' is not a good set of phrases to put in the same sentence as me." I made that last point clear. I am no good fortune, I am everything wrong and I know that. I don't think I'm pure evil or something extreme, but I'm the last person to be considered a good person entirely. That, I don't believe in 'Normal People', so that made the margin finer

"Oh, you're awake, perfect!" Suddenly a gust of wind brushed beside me, ending with a flurry of pink in my face, the mare in question leaning over the table with a wide smile. "I have lots of really important questions to ask you, like. Your favorite color, food, sweet, music, book if you read any, age-"

My hoof firmly covered her auto jaw from clanking along, my breath slow as I looked to her with a bemused expression. "Pinkie, while I have appreciated your help, really, I have, my day is going to be a long and annoying one, meaning I don't have time for twenty million questions about my sob story."

"But-" I shut her muzzle again, I didn't want to get mad at her of all ponies, I was being firm, there's a difference

"Pinkie. I have nowhere to live, little to no money, no job, only my 'charming' personality, annoying voice, and a cape to my name. I don't don't have time to mess around." Said cape on my back right now, thankfully cleaned overnight. I removed my hoof from her face again, giving them both a fake smile. "I'll see ya around, Pinks."

Pushing myself around, I sat my hooves back on the ground with a slight stumble, still wasn't used to walking on all fours yet but I was getting there. Yet I couldn't stop my head from turning to see...remember when I said I don't like 'Good Luck' next to my name? Pinkie looked...less happy, sure, she was smiling but her eyes looked...guilty? Can I ever catch a break?

"R-Right, have fun today, Dimi." Pinkie left for the kitchen before I could say anything. But, wait, the time she grows restrain in pressing answers to people was after that one episode with the Griffon...yeah, she stopped being so insistent to her friends while Rainbow learned who her real friends were, interesting as that episode was, she...considers me a friend?

"Great, now I just made Pinkie upset with me over a simple snap in my tone, perfect, the first pony in this place to be nice to me and now this," I grumbled, glaring at a few background ponies staring at me, those curious eyes soon turned away just as quickly. "I'm on a track record now!"

"Miss. Dimitri." Turning around again, Mrs. Cake stood with a soft, almost motherly smile on her face again. "Pinkie Pie is a nice girl, a little overbearing at times but she means well to everypony."

"I know, just that I have the talent of messing up everything I touch, pony or otherwise." Great, now I felt guilty, Gods dammit. "Honestly she's the only one I know of that has been a genuine good...pony to be around."

"You did say you were going to look for a job, but that would be hard to come by, Ponyville is a small town and not many jobs are available this time of year." If that's supposed to make me feel worse than it's working. Obviously, she could see the visible slump in my form, and she giggled softly, looking at me kindly. "But..." But? "I could offer you a place to stay here if you're willing to work?"

Did she...just offer me a job? Like, I cannot be kicked onto the streets to fend off the coming winter? I...while the prospect of these ponies generosity was nice, it was...far too nice, I mean who offers someone a job without knowing a thing about their background, qualifications, and...s-screw it. Screw it, I need a stable source of income, gotta sell it though.

"I mean...I did work as a KP, I have experience in woodwork too if that helps." I shrugged at probably my two most useful traits in working in a bakery, but this place also doubles like my old job, it's a cafe, so... "I've also worked as a waiter once, mind you I stuck to KP since it was much easier, but really whatever you need my skills for I can provide."

"Perfect, it won't be much so payment will really be just for a room here, sorry." I raised my hoof quickly, not wanting to make this conversation anymore awkward

"You and Pinkie have already done more than I can clearly pay for, so once again, thank you." I ten chuckled a little. "I have another skill, but that's my only other option for income, but enough about that, I'll be heading out to grab some things."

"I don't mind, you can start early tomorrow if that isn't too much to ask."

"You're my boss now, so if nothing's got me caught up I can be here, don't many places to go." I muttered the last part under my breath

As far as I can see things. I need a stable source of income for my investigation into these Rings of Reality, I have one, but I also have a horn so magic will be extremely useful. There's also that Zebra in the woods that I think has or is going to show up, potion brewing would be grand too. Equipment for venturing into the Everfree, especially against more Timberwolves. I guess I should be grateful these ponies are so naive, makes my housing and money problem simple to solve, but it keeps my mind off this form and voice of mine, Gods know every aspect of this body makes my skin crawl and my mentally fragile.

Lord help those who dare hit on me. I'm not one for looks, but I got to say I do look like a badass, I actually remind myself of Blackjack come to think of it, only less cybernetics and more comical suffering and sarcasm.

"Right, see you later, Dimitri." With a short wave between us I slowly pushed the oak door open to bask in the warmth that remained of Summer, this colorful world was indeed nice and lively, but something's out there and knowing how bad guys work it probably wants to rid those who would stand between it and the Rings, well, I play catch-up then

"Seeya, Boss." With that, I stepped onto the dirt track ahead

Equestria was as bright, animated and lively as presented from the TV, while the brightness was far more present now, at least my eyes haven't melted from their sockets, I noticed that right away upon searching the town. The residents were all friendly, too friendly given how used to casual greetings of my world, but I'm not on Earth, I'm in Equestria thanks to an unknown creature named 'Gambit'...yeah, that makes me sound crazier than Discord.

Now THAT'S someone I can't wait to meet.

While I decided to venture into the town on my own, I did have absolutely no idea where I was going, did I ask for directions? No, because I'm an introvert and I get uncomfortable asking strangers for assistance, I know its a curse, look if they instigate a conversation, by all means, I'll ask, until then, this sad, sad little man will keep to himself.

This train of thought lasted a full five seconds.

Something out the corner of my eye forced my whole perception of time to crawl at the sight of a pony working on one of the thatch roofs, but that didn't matter to my eyesight, what did was the tool case sat beside him, or lack of one since it was sliding towards the edge of the roof and from the point it was going to descend it would strike a yellow pony who was walking towards said drop zone. Not good, not good at all.

My better judgment aside, I broke into a sprint again as I did for the wolves, my mind a singular train of conative thought against logic and the rules of this world, while I doubt severe injury was an apparent staple in this universe, I wasn't going to find out by standing there and watching someone who had done nothing wrong be my lab rat. Gods, I hope this is worth my time, I did just get this wretched body.

"Get back!" With a startling yell from me and my hooves shoving the pony back, I was met with a brief pause of nothing. Did the pony catch it with - wait, he was a - GAH, son of a-! "Oww...why me...?"

"Oh my, are you okay!?" If I wasn't I'd be dead...I felt both the case and tools atop my back, all adding their own apparent sensation of pain, after a moment to groan under the case, I pushed my body off the ground, the tools falling off my back like rain, if rain was reinforced steel. With a shake of my head, I felt my back pop multiple times

"Ahh...so much better." I turned back to the yellow pegasus...with a pink mane, blue eyes...Fluttershy. "Aye, I just love putting myself in painful predicaments to save ponies from OTHERS WHO CAN'T KEEP A GRIP ON THEIR GEAR!"

My yell made the earth pony above wince, while I just looked to the second main character, and my youngest sister, Ruby's favorite, Fluttershy. The look of worry plastered on her face was a complete contrast to my smirk at actually coming face-to-face with another of the cast, while not my favorite, she was purely innocent.

"O-oh, I'm sorry, miss...I-I didn't mean for you to be hurt because of me." Is she apologizing for an act out of her control? Ugh, so innocent it makes any heartless being gain said organ

"I'm still alive, no harm no foul." I waved, moving past her to continue on my merry way, I have done something nice, its only a matter of time before I bring misfortune, and I doubt it was the tool case that crashed into my spinal cord like a ton of bricks. "Try keeping your eyes on where you walk, eh?"

"T-thank you, but umm...what's your name?" That makes three, meh, no harm in telling

"Dimitri, seeya around..."

"I..I'm Fluttershy." Even if she was a near whisper, I still knew what she was trying to tell me, so with a final wave of my hoof I moved on with a painful amount of pressure flaring across my back. I swear, next on my list is to file a health and safety complaint for my poor vertebrae

Now, I've gone and made the first kind pony to me upset. Managed to gain housing and a job. Now I had my spine fractured in possible places I'd rather not see on an X-Ray, did they have X-Ray's here? Was it magic? Questions for later I suppose. Now, what could make my day feel worse, you may be wondering like that itching feeling in the back of my neck supposed? I don't know why, but every time something unexpected is about to happen I always get this itching sensation on the back of my neck, sometimes I just have an itch.

"Look out beloooow~!"

This was not an itch, this was a live burial.

It was all in a flash of unsuspecting colors, but my body had made compressed contact with something at terminal velocity, the result, I was face-first in the ground, the attacker crushing my body from above as the gravel and dirt muffled my yell of annoyance over the events beginning to unravel before my mind, I guilt-tripped, crushed and buried all in a row, I just need water and fire and I got myself the Elements of Misfortune...that's actually a good title, I'm keeping that.

"Hello, darkness my old friend..." I grumbled, feeling the hooves wrench me from the dirt, and the culprit was the Skittle, slash, meme embodiment, Rainbow Dash. While I was on the brink of collapse, she looked ready to burst into a fit of laughter

"S-Sorry 'bout that, I, heh, I hit a massive wind current, and well you know the rest." Casual to the point of being naive

"Transparently." Was my irritated response to her humor, shaking the loose bits of dirt from my mane I rubbed a hoof across my dry muzzle. "I'd say be cautious, but when do you of all ponies know the meaning of it?"

"Well, you got me there," Rainbow replied with a cool shrug but quickly flashed me an apologetic look. "Seriously though, you alright? I did hit you a terminal velocity?"

"Aye," It's my usual response, sue me. "I've suffered worse at the ha - hooves of this village already." Hmm...idea. "Say, have you tried using those currents to aid your flying?"

"For speed, of course!" Rainbow spun into the air with a flap of her wings, grinning down on me. "What better way to gain speed is there without physical power?" While her lack of knowledge in everything else was noticeable, I won't deny her experience when it comes to aerial capability

"Try finding the center of the current and ride the flow, you'll gain top speeds and still have complete control over your flight patterns, maybe enough to avoid burying ponies in shallow graves?" My suggestion wasn't without dry sarcasm, but Rainbow still winced slightly but looked deep in thought of my advice, and as if a lightbulb flicked on, she nodded to herself

"Yeah...yeah that could work awesomely!" Is that a word? She quickly patted my shoulder and flew towards the sky again, turning back to view my curious look. "Hey, thanks-"

"Name's Dimitri, and I know who you are, Rainbow Dash." While I didn't like the fact I was put into the ground like some sicko playing Minecraft, I still held no contempt for the Skittle Pony, but if it happens again I won't hold back my ranting

"Well, seeya around, Dimi!" Wait I - She's gone...I bloody hate that nickname, I sound like a...

"Oh to hell with you Gambit!"

Where am I now? A forest? I had wandered around the village, preferably along the outskirts to gain a better footing of the locations from an elevated point, made marking certain places easier than simply wandering in circles and getting distracted by shop windows and stalls. For example, SCC or Sugarcube Corner would act at my compass point, so any locations would be from there onwards as my central location. That forest with the shimmering trees was in the East according to Pinkie; Note, remember to apologize later, anywho, the Everfree was to the South East, I remember walking to my left...so I was heading North or North East, so I'll either see the...Okay, let's call it, Silver Grove, yeah, I like that. So I'll appear near it or the Everfree, depending on where this route takes me, which is another forest...hmm...

*Bonk*

"Ow." My dry wince at the solid thunk to my head was apparent to no one, and when the red object rolled to my feet like a warning signal of an explosive, it wasn't over

*Bonk*

"Ow." Bonk. "Ow." Bonk. "Ow." Nope. "Ha, missed." Bonk

I was now scratching my head with my hoof, lack of fingers making this progress painful but much better for the soft tissue damage I'd endured from several apples that struck my head, if I wasn't already damaged mentally this would have caused some issues. I do have to admit these apples looked brilliant, a rich red texture, not a bruise or sign of ripening to be seen on the surface. You know what, this tree's giving me the sign that I haven't eaten today, so why not? I just got fruitful of apples to the head...

"Did I just think of an apple pun?" Wow, really getting to the core of this world's puns...I'll stop. Picking up the first of the apples to attack me fruitlessly, I lied, I examined the magical power of invisible fingers on my hoof, I get magic is a fundamental plot armor of this show, but seriously, this just breaks every rule in the book, I have a flat surface for a hoof, no ridge, and I don't even know how to use the spike sticking out my forehead for levitation. "Welp, ain't gettin' any deader." I bit down on the surface

By all that is holy, I have found Eden.

The flavor of this fresh fruit was by far an amalgamation of natural flavor and sweetness, the juice wasn't bitter but just as amazing as the apple itself if I wasn't smiling before, I was now. With a soft moan at the taste, I happily ate away at the fresh apple in-hoof, my thoughts of today's experiences feeling worth every painful moment for this reward of nature. I may not like my new form, but by the Gods, I didn't have a problem with this world's sweets and fruits.

*Bam*

This moment of bliss all but lasted thirty seconds.

"Ahh, mother of God, why!?" I cradled my head again from the back, rolling on the grass in pain over the force of a sharp slap to the back of my dome, whoever did that was officially making me angry, you can annoy and irritate me, but violence only bred more of the same kind, but I had the mind of a human. "What is it now~?"

"You bein' a thievin' varmin, that's what!?" The amount of 'Ns' in that sentence would make me tongue-tied, I slowly rolled back around to see another pony before my eyes, an Earth Pony to be clear, and was orange...oh no, the stubborn one. "You either pay, miss, or else."

"Jesus, take a chill pill you nut-case, I didn't know I was on a farm, not exactly labeled as a farm for miles!" I hissed, rubbing my head as my hooves push me back off the ground, from a small pouch attached to my cape I procured the bag of bits from seemingly nowhere. Also, 'Bits', that has to rank high on the unoriginality of the name, I get its what a 1/8th of a dollar in America way back when, or in layman's terms, 12.5 cents. Why not Dram or Col, hell, I'd take Glimmer just to make me smile more. "Look, just tell where I can get back to the village and we'll be good."

"Well alright, but don't try lyin' to me either." Her steely reply only added to my salty attitude; That's right, she's a lie detector in pony form and I'm a guy who happens to have zero filter on what I think and do. Handing her the Bits, stupid name, I pointed up at the tree that attacked me

"I was crushed my tools saving Fluttershy, buried by the walking trademark Rainbow, and now pummeled by sweet fruits, I believe that deserves some form of compensation, low and behold, the first fruit trees for miles happened to be a farm, hooray!" I threw my hooves up in dramatic fashion, moving past the bemused Applejack, but her eyes reflected...what, remorse? Bah, bah I say! "Nevermind, I'll find my way back...eventually."

"...Turn left, and..."

"Stealing is stealing despite my reasons, goodbye." I waved her off, my day has gone from sour to sweet than a bitter-sweet again. "Don't make apologies for those who are cheap."

How was I reacting so calmly to all of this? I mean...I'm in Equestria and that aspect was already pushed aside come today, but...this form is what bothers me, how am I so calm about being stuck in the body meant for the opposite gender? It made me want to curl up and die, sure, but did my own goals outweigh my natural hate of this body? I wanted to go home, back to my two annoying sisters so I can keep their minds straight and on a better path than mine, but was that really it?

I also took meeting my sisters' favorite characters well too, I guess its exciting but the situations I found myself in broke that awkward barrier quickly. Fluttershy was nice, innocent, so I don't have a problem with her. Rainbow is fine, so long as she doesn't bother me I doubt I'd get irritated. Applejack? Already in my bad books, but then again I instigated it by accident, so we'll see. Pinkie...yeah, still feel bad about that, didn't think my attitude would affect her so quickly. All that's left is the egg-head Twilight and...Spike! Ohhohoho, I can't wait to meet a real dragon! He may be a growing dragon, but it was still a fire-breathing legend!

Rarity...nope, don't like her. My reason? If I ever encounter her, and I will if I'm to get something sorted for me, she'd try to mess with my hair and complexion, but my messy hairstyle is my hairstyle, I comb it but only enough to straighten out the bedhead, nothing more, but again we'll see how things go. Now, where can I find myself some knowledge, bar a man sitting in the corner with a car.

Library...

Library?

Lightbulb!

I slammed my hoof against my forehead; I truly am the reason this world may burn in my wake. The obvious answer to my question was somewhere among these streets, if anything that will contain the books I need to learn magic, I do that, and this ring won't be the only weapon I have! I am a genius. Scanning the medieval structures around me, my gaze drifted to my right, sat right in the middle of an intersection was the great tree that was seen almost every episode. If I make it back home, I'll thank my sisters for forcing me to watch this show with them.

Stepping up to the door of the mystical tree...house, it's a tree, but a house and a library...but its called a 'Treehouse' despite not being a 'Treehouse'? Moving on, I pushed the door open softly with my hoof, half expecting the door to recoil and crush my face or send me flying backward, nope, just an ordinary door. Cool. With a rush of warm air meeting my body, I felt a large shiver run down my back for a second as the door shut behind me.

To my eyes sat rows of colorful and bleak covers, sat in alphabetical order and perfection, a medium-sized table sat in the middle where a few books, quills and ink pots sat. Other than the added features of a house; Basement door, kitchen, stairs, etc. The place seemed empty, good, no bad luck to be found here. With no-one around I got to work scanning for 'M', if I were to learn magic or arcane spells, 'A' and 'M' were my best chances, maybe 'S' for spells or spiritual? Nah, stick to basics, Dimitri, keep it simple.

"Hey Twilight, you back ye - huh?" Wait...that voice. I needed to keep my hooves firm to the ground, don't freak out over the fact that a Dragon was watching you from behind, a legendary creature of power and badassness, keep calm Dimitri, stay focused. "Umm...who are you?"

"It's a library, I believe the concept of 'Public' is obvious?" I replied calmly, shoving my salty nature after today aside for a moment, with a slow turn I came to face the purple dragon himself, Spike. He was carrying a comic between his claws too, but he looked nervous in front of me, did I have a scowl again? "I'm scowling, aren't I?"

"W-What, no, I just - most ponies knock before entering, you're the first other than Twilight's friends to do that." I consider that a compliment on my intelligence, with a smirk I motioned to the shelves with my head

"Mind giving me a hand then? A dragon's help would be much appreciated." I asked him and to my surprise, he smiled and sat the comic on the table down

"Sure, what is it you're looking for?" Good question, my scaly friend

"Anything on basic magic, spells, arcane, nothing too complex." I listed, and without a moment of hesitation he pulled a dark purple book out

"How about...'Spellcrafter's Vol II'?" Spike was quick on the trigger, not bad. I nodded then...I paused. "What? not what you needed?"

"No...I...just can't use this blasted horn stuck to my forehead." That gave me a look of bewilderment, so I tapped it with a frown. "You wake up in a forest with this stuck to your head and tell me how you operate it?" I pointed at him to answer

"You woke up in the woods without knowing how to use magic?" He sounded sarcastic, and that sly look only made me snort

"Aye, typical amnesia lie wasn't what I was going to say anyway, so yeah, I literally do not know how to use magic, funny that." I chuckled a little, followed by Spike joining in

"Now then, shall we continue..." Might as well play the dumb card. To my liking, he held a claw out to me

"I'm Spike." Happily, I grasped his claw with my hoof, shaking with a buzz of glee over greeting a dragon

"Dimitri, glad to meet a dragon."

"-Then from nowhere, BOOM, this ball of purple magic came crashing into the horde of Hive, sending waves of magical surges across the area before the three of them, while the horde was wiped clean from existence!" I was now telling Spike about the great battle for The Last Array, and he was enjoying it to his heart's content, even getting us both tea, and that only made the woes of today melt away with the sweet nectar at my side

"What happened next!? Did they win?" He was at the edge of his cushion, claws grasping the table with anticipation. But my right ear flicked at the sound of the door opening, but I didn't pay to mind who entered it was a Public Library after all

"Well, with a final push of Zane, Ceres, and Morbin-7 the three pushed back the remaining horde, Zane slicing down the giant Hollowed Knight with a sword, shattering the Knight into pieces like glass and as quickly as the battle began, the air grew still once more with the sound of silence." I folded my forelimbs with a smile, seeing him clap for my tale told right, of course, I did delve a little into the lore to give the tale more 'oomph', but he liked it, much better than those bland comics

"That was quite the tale, a little, shall we say, foreboding?" Oh no. No-no-no-no-no. Turning around to the two that entered, the first was the purple prodigy herself, Twilight Sparkle, but the one I feared the most, Rarity, lords help me now. Spike didn't see the look of irritation that began to fester on my face, but I frowned a lot so it's hard to tell

"You missed it, Twilight! Dimitri was telling me this awesome story about three Guardian ponies that faced an army of aliens that wanted to harm Equestria!" Yeah, I twisted it, but I enjoyed telling it. I'd thank my friend for writing it if I make it back home alive. "Oh, right, this is Dimitri, my new friend."

"I second that!" I called out, sipping the last of my tea down my throat with a lengthy sigh at the sweet taste over my bitter emotions. "I came by the gather some knowledge on all things magical, I also made friends with a scaly dragon, so a win-win for me."

"Really? Well, I'm Twilight Sparkle, nice to meet you, Dimitri." Kind start, then she pointed to Rarity. "This here is Rarity, and - umm, Rarity?"

"I'm sorry dear, but what is that ghastly thing you're wearing?" Her hoof was pointed with a disgusted look at the tattered cape on my back, while I do agree it needs a makeover, it happens to be a part of the set I label as 'Mistake', myself included in the purchase

"You dissing the cape?" I asked with a mocked expression, before turning to a flat stare. "While I do need a remodeling of this thing, It happens to have kept my back from becoming torn by dirt, so its a lucky accessory to me."

"No-no, this simply cannot be. A lady can't walk around in such...barbaric clothing." Don't ponies normal walk around naked anyways? Twilight shared the internal statement with a confused raise of her brow

"Rarity, I don't think it matters, ponies don't wear clothing, and even if they do, there's obviously some significance to Dimitri's cape." Twilight's persuasive advice fell on Death's ears, the mare looked determined, and I looked helplessly at Spike

"Nice knowing ya, buddy, but if I die, you know why." My sharp reply was followed by him nodding, and I continued my rant. "You can redesign the cape, but only under my designs, so sadly, that will have to wait a day or so. Other than that, back off."

"Very well, but you must let me do something with your mane." I went from defense to offense. "That wild, unkempt look makes Rainbow Dash presentable."

"Ouch." Both Twilight and Spike muttered at the burn, while I grinned with a devilish glow in my eyes, like my white ring

"Touch my hair, you lose a limb, you come near me with a blade and I'll do the same," I growled, patting my wild style. "Ain't no one touching this beautiful calamity and that's that."

"But this -" I slammed my hoof

"You. Will Not. Touch It." I wasn't going to crack under her persistence, I am not that weak. "I am extremely self-conscious about my hair and it's length, style included. Much like the ring I bear you won't lay a hoof on either."

"The Ring?" Oh bugger I just let that cat out didn't I? See what rage and paranoia of one's looks can do to a man? I grazed the ring with a hoof, the chain rattled a little at my touch. "Oh wow, can I...sorry, you mind if I look at it?"

"At least you asked, unlike someone." I glared at Rarity, then motioned for Twilight to look at the ring around my neck, her eyes glowing with wonder, Spike merely sat with a curious gaze

"Amazing! The ring itself has properties of magic embedded in the metal, I was wondering what I was sensing before." Unicorns can do that? I guess having the ring with me at all times made that sense numb to me, moving away from me Twilight sat down with us at the table. "So, where did you get it?"

"...Someone gave this to me." That was all I would say, but Rarity had given me a knowing look of kindness

"Oooh, 'someone', a life-long partner?" Whatever Hasbro wanted to do with this character I did not know, but I didn't like it, my red face certainly didn't, stupid body, stupid antisocial behavior!

"Continue that line of questioning, try me," I warned, sighing as I patted my cheeks. "No, the pony that gave this to me wanted me to find others like it, there are six more out there, this was the first. No way in hell would I be in a relationship, I'd rather die alone."

"Seven rings? Sounds like a Daring Doo book." Spike commented while I took my chance to leave before I lost the will to live completely

"Much as I like talking with you three about things I would prefer never came up again, I must go, I have what I required." I tied the sack of books to my back tightly, nodding to Spike with a smile. "Let's talk more, having a guy to talk to makes my life a little less crazy."

"Will you tell more stories!?" I laughed at that, nodding with a salute. Good, one friend made and it happens to be a dragon, good end to the day if I do say so myself. "Yes!"

"Dimitri?" I turned my head again, seeing the look of interest on Twilight's face. "Why did you need books on basic magic?"

"I don't know how to use magic."

...

...

She laughed, and I felt my frown deepen. So close to me liking you, Twilight, and that small step just crumbled at your hooves. While it didn't scave me much, I still find the prospect of having the main character of the show mock me. Her laugh died away, seeing the look of seriousness on my face, and she immediately turned to concern again. Yeah, too late, even Spike caught on to how I was taking it.

"You...you really don't know?"

"Noooo, what makes you say that?" She winced at my harsh tone, Rarity already looked remorseful, but I wasn't having it. "Well, seeya, Spike."

"Dimitri-" The door had closed behind me and I relished in the fact I got to put that fashion pony in her place. It's one to suggest a new look for someone, but to try and force change on themselves without any tact is as bad as mocking them for who they were. And yes, while the idea of a unicorn not understanding magic is unheard of, I don't have a problem with her laughing, but the sound, how it was directed at me...that made things come up that shouldn't. Still, she's not a bad pony, just picking her words or actions carefully would suffice

"Christ, today was a rollercoaster." Staring up at the evening sky, I felt the last of the sun's warmth begin to strike my face, the soft breeze brushing my cape slightly, the tattered fabric torn to the point it might fall apart on me. If Rarity has the sense to hear me out, I'll see if she can prep some clothing ideas I have

"I'm a cursed black cat, I'm an albatross, I'm a mirror broken, sad to say, I'm everyone's bad luck charm."

"SURPRISE!"

Holy Mothers of Gods! Falling backward onto my haunches, I felt my heart nearly tear itself from my chest at the sudden shock, my face rising in heat from the sudden shock and eyes watching me. It was...a lot of ponies, most I don't even know, bar...ugh, the ones that put me through Hell's seven levels today, Pinkie, Twilight, Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow, Fluttershy, and the only one to be of amusement bar Pinkie, Spike.

"A...what?" I was honestly stuck between bewilderment and genuine confusion as to why this party was here, right now in my new temporary living space. To my clarity, Pinkie bounced up to me wearing a party hat, her smile wider than the sun

"Well, it's your 'Welcome to Ponyville and Home Party'!" I was too starstruck to make a response, I just...didn't expect this from strangers I barely knew, sure, I know about them, but I don't 'know' them. "It's also my super special apology party too for annoying you today."

"'Annoying me'?" Wait, did she mean - o-oh...wow. Feeling slightly guilty about that again, I rubbed the back of my neck. "Pinkie, that wasn't...that was me being me, I'm a massive ass - jerk, and I'm an idiot most of the time if that wasn't clear." I apologized instead, I guess I did come off as myself more than I realized, not many people back home would feel obligated to apologize for annoying me, it was just how things work and I was fine with that factor. "I didn't think you'd feel bothered by my attitude."

"Well duh, Pinkie told us how agitated you got, we...kind of seen we did that too, like me hitting you." Seriously? Rainbow Dash was apologizing? I have only been here two days and the world is starting to fall apart without my knowledge. The others all shared the same knowing looks, say for Spike and Applejack, the only two to NOT harm me today, but they watched as the others added their own points to my perplexed expression

"I didn't watch where I was going and you ended up hurt for saving me, thank you and sorry again." Fluttershy...how is that even her fault remotely? I got myself thrown under the...well I took the hit for her because my legs went autopilot

"I made of fun of something you don't have control of, that was hypocritical of me." Twilight was right, but that's only because most unicorns can utilize magic, but I can't, so it's understandable

"I...might have been a little insistent on your looks, Dimitri, even if most were justifiable." Touch my hair and so help me. "But I too am sorry for the stress I put you through today." I mean sure, if they're all sorry, so be it, so long as she has no intention of pulling that stunt again

"While a' had a justifiable reason, ah'm sorry too." Not necessary, so I waved her off with a small smile

"Trust me, I deserved it, but..." I felt my cheeks burn again at the stupid mistake on my end. If there was any other example to give of my bad luck, this was as clear as any point given by myself.

"Alright stop with the sappy apologizes." Raising my hoof I planted it back down with a hardened look. "I. Am. A. Jerk. This irritated, dry sarcasm is my usual shtick, I just have a funny way of displaying my views of the world, you all took as genuine anger, trust me, you'd have to try hard to make me angry at something. Unless you touch my...mane, I'm very self-conscious about that."

Seeing my smile rise back to my face, I looked to Spike who sat near what looked to be a music box, so I shook my head and shouted out to the group of ponies, whether or not I knew them, its like a nightclub in a way, we all come to party, turns out I'm the center of attention but who gives a damn.

"Alright, Spike, hit me up with some tunes! The sooner the attention is taken off me the better!" I wanted to crawl into a hole and die with all the eyes watching me, judging me, ugh. You know, given how much I've been decorated, tackled, thunked with objects, magically tortured and nearly drowned, even near-death by flying objects, these ponies are sort-of human, or what humans of good will are like

"You got it!" How people hate you is beyond me, my scaly friend, but whatever, as I said, these ponies are like humans too

They had flaws, they can come off as egotistical, pushy, annoying or even defenseless. But...they also are kind, forgiving in a way, and somewhat amusing to watch when I wasn't the one being injured, if not for this wretched form I may actually enjoy somethings about this world, even just a bit. Hell, this body helped me understand girls more, so win-win I guess, I met the Mane 6 and a bloody dragon and free insight into how the complex structural labyrinth of a girl's mind works...well, only by a tiny margin, but hey its a start.

All in all, Equestria so far may be A-Okay, even if just a bit.

To Be Continued...

Author's Note

You all seemed to like the start of this story, many of which like the concept of a guy turned girl like me, plus Dimitri isn't one to be stubborn, only logical when the situation arises, such as when the Cakes offered her to stay while giving her a job, instead of 'Oh go work for Applejack' cliche. Hope you enjoyed this light-hearted chapter and seeya in the next one!

Next Chapter: Warlocks Go Floof
I may like the idea of my persona as a Hunter, but that doesn't mean magic is out of the question, A Hunter with the power of a Warlock, now that's a power play.

Author's Notes: This story takes place just after Season 1 Episode 15