Titan Mauler

Amenadiel sat at the same metal table from earlier, though he was not bound to it. Sitting across from him was his copy, Fox. Fox was flipping through a file with a cigar hanging loosely out of his mouth. Every now and again, he would grab the cigar and flick the ash off the front. During his escape attempt earlier Amenadiel had miscalculated the spread of his shotgun, which was now leaning against his chair, and took a couple of pellets to the side. They had been removed and the wounds were cauterized before being bandaged. He had to remind himself not to grab his wound, even if the pain was bothering him, for it would make him look weak.

Fox cleared his throat and took the cigar out of his mouth. “I lied.” He started. “About a couple of things, but when we first met, I had been in that hospital bed for three days and you were in yours for a week and a half. They only called me in a few days after they discovered the… matching of our genetic makeup.” Flicking the ash off of his cigar and shook his head. “Where are my manners?” He turned the small wooden box on the table towards Amenadiel and slid it forward. “Cigar? Helps ease the mind.”

Amenadiel took one, clipped the beginning nub off, and blew a little fire on the other end before taking a quick puff. “Thank you.” He muttered as Fox continued.

“The only thing separating us, in the case of DNA, is that you were born a Dragon and I was born a Changeling.” Amenadiel nodded as Fox spoke. “You see DNA, don't know if your world got that far in technology, is like… the Architect of who you are. It orders cells to grow, what to grow into, and what you'll look like at what stage in your life. In DNA, certain lines dictate your traits.” He gestured to his red scales. “Scale color, eye color, height, everything about your physical appearance is dictated by DNA. Most important bit, is it dictates what parts you get. Even then, there's the rare cases that it fucks up.” Amenadiel nodded silently, only barely grasping the idea of what Fox was talking about. “You grew to be a warrior. I grew to be a scholar.”

Amenadiel scoffed and leaned back in his chair, smiling. “You missed out. I brought quite a bit of glory to the family name.”

Fox shook his head and ashed his cigar. “That's not what your memories say.” Amenadiel fell quiet. “You were exiled. Dishonored, hated, and left for dead at a young age. You fought the light, to serve the darkness inside of you.”

He was about to continue before Amenadiel slammed his fist onto the table and stood up, pointing a finger at his copy. “And you're any better?” He accused. “You're a fucking changeling, how can you be better than me?”

“I'm not.” Fox countered, setting the file on the table and sliding it to Amenadiel. He opened it up and started flipping through it. It had his name, but it was about the Changeling sitting across from him. He had multiple arrests to his name, all of them being non-violent crimes such as vandalism and larson. Serving a brief stint in the Equestrian Royal Guard, his abilities of investigation we're soon found and he was promoted to 'Detective’ in the Equestrian Bureau of Justice. “I was a delinquent. A misfit. I was abandoned by my hive and left to die, just like you. Only difference with me, is that I found someone to take care of me.” Fox shook his head and shrugged. “He found me, not the point.”

Sitting back down in his chair, Amenadiel puffed his cigar. “So what happens from here?”

“Well…” Fox started before reaching under the table and pulling out another file. “We get to work. I was working on your case while you were asleep, I found nothing.”

Sliding the file over to his counterpart, Amenadiel looked through it. It barely had any papers in it, just a few photos and a basic theory. “You found where I appeared?” Fox nodded as Amenadiel looked through the photos, eyebrow slowly rising.

“You feel that?” Fox asked as he saw the look on Amenadiel's face. “You just noticed something in the photos that only I was able to see.”

“What was that?” Amenadiel questioned as he examined the barely noticeable scorch marks on the grass where he awoke.

“You're getting my abilities.” Fox replied, leaning back in his chair. “I've gained some of yours, too. I found myself spitting fire the first day I met you. The more time we spend together, the more abilities we gain from each other.”

“As if the universe is attempting to join us as one.” Amenadiel quipped, closing the file.

“Um, close? It's not pulling us together, it's more like forcing us to be carbon copies of the best traits.” Fox scratched his head. “I've gotten your fire breath and your strength, you've gotten my intuition and my quick wits. Not only that, but I've lost some of my addictions.”

Amenadiel smiled and scoffed. “I have not felt the need to pick up a bottle of liquor in a while.”

“And I haven't felt the symptoms of cocaine withdrawal.” Fox replied. When Amenadiel was about to question, he waved his hand. “I was undercover. Trying to bust an arms dealer and ended up doing way too much coke to prove myself.” He sucked his teeth and nodded slowly. “Was kinda fun? Had a lot of sex, some I regret, but it was in the name of Justice.”

“That's a difference between me and you.” Amenadiel chuckled. “I've never laid a woman.”

“I thought you bed Joan that one night.” Fox countered.

“Oh no, I remember it clearly. We retreated to her tent, preparing for it, the moment I laid her down she must have passed out!” They both bursted into laughter, throwing their heads back. “I was making my way from her neck to her nethers and I heard snoring! I was already nude so I thought 'might as well sleep too’!”

They both laughed loudly, Amenadiel pounding a fist on the table as Fox held his face in his palm. “Oh god.” Fox wheezed as the two started to calm down. “Oh fuck, that's unfortunate.”

Amenadiel swallowed hard and nodded. “Yeah, she had a nice backside too. I was a little disappointed.”

Fox nodded in agreement and pointed to his counterpart. “Maybe you'll see her again.”

“And when I do…” Amenadiel started, pointing back.

“I'mma smash that ass!” They said simultaneously before bursting into laughter again.

The door to the room swung open and the tall blue pony walked in with a red face. “Alright, alright. That's enough. This has gone completely off track.”

The two calmed down and Fox wiped a tear from his eye. “Come on, Princess! I'm just trying to connect with myself!”

“Yes, yes. Your fun and games are over.” The blue pony said, rolling her eyes before looking to Amenadiel. “You have two options. Join the EBJ, or have a nice cozy cell in a Maximum Security prison somewhere in the north.”

Amenadiel kicked his feet up on the table and lifted his chair slightly. “Become a Guard or go to the Gulag?” He scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest. “Been to the Gulag before, in my world. I'll join your little Spy Group but on three conditions.”

“You're not in the pos-” The blue pony started before Fox cut her off.

“Be reasonable.” He ordered his counterpart.

“First, we're the same rank.” Amenadiel said, wagging his finger between himself and… himself. “Second, I get my stuff back. Sword, Shotgun, Bag of Holding, all of it. Third, I'll need a spell book. Preferably non-verbal spells.”

Fox gestured the blue pony over and they whispered to each other for a second. The changeling nodded and leaned away. “Deal, but your every move is being watched.”

Amenadiel stood up and clapped his hands together. “Perfect. Let's get to work.”

====----________----====

Fox and Amenadiel walked down a path through a small town. Fox was back to his pony disguise, but he wore a pale gold cloth coat that went past his tail. Amenadiel wore a similar coat, but his was grey and had his shotgun on the inside being held up by velcro. At first he had argued that he did not need a coat since he was able to regulate his body temperature, perks of having an internal flame. The blue pony, who he learned was a Princess and Director of the EBJ by the name of Luna, ordered him to quote 'put the damn coat on if you're not going to wear a shirt’. Since she was his boss, for now, he obeyed and wore the coat. It was… comfortable, to say the least. He didn't want to admit, but he kind of liked it.

As the two walked through the town, the ponies going about their day seemed to walk away from Amenadiel, even if they were approaching. It was almost as if the massive sword on his back and the fact that he was a dragon scared them away. “Don't worry too much.” Fox said as he looked around the town. “If they're afraid now, they'll warm up to you when you flash the badge enough times.”

Eventually they came across a bland building that had the words 'Ponyville Courthouse and Sheriff's Department’ on a sign out front. It seemed empty from the outside, but as soon as they walked in they were met with a small waiting room with a Gryphon sitting behind a desk. They were filing their talons and not paying attention to the two as they approached. The Gryphon only noticed the two when Fox cleared his throat.

Looking up from their talons, they jumped in surprise and fell back in their chair. “Spirits!” He shouted as he stood back up and fixed his chair. “Thought I fixed that bell above the door.”

Fox reached into his coat and pulled out a small faux-leather booklet, flipping it open to reveal his badge. “Detective Fox, this is my partner Detective Dragon.”

Amenadiel scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest. “That's original.”

“Wasn’t my call.” Fox replied as the Gryphon examined the badge.

“Shit.” The Gryphon muttered, staring in awe at the badge. “I thought y'all were a myth.”

Amenadiel rolled his eyes and was about to say something before Fox spoke. “Besides the point, we're here to see the Sheriff.”

The Gryphon nodded and sat back down in his chair. “Sheriff Blackjack is in her office. It's…” He looked at the clock on the wall. “Half past nine, so she's probably still passed out.”

“We'll wake her.” Amenadiel commented as he walked to the door saying ‘Sheriff's Department’ on it. Fox gave a silent 'thank you’ to the Gryphon and chased after Amenadiel.

Walking through the door, they came to realize that it was a rather small department with only about four desks scattered throughout the room. There was a set of metal lockers with names on each of them sitting near the door. A weapons locker sat on the far wall near a door labelled 'Lab’ with a piece of paper under the word saying 'and Evidence’ scribbled on it sloppily. On the left wall was a door with the word 'Sheriff’ on the window and a note taped to the handle. Amenadiel walked up to the door, Fox following behind him, and grabbed the note.

Unfolding the note, Amenadiel read it out loud. “Dear deputies, if it's not important leave me alone. If it is important, knock on the door before calling Canterlot for backup. They will no longer send units if they get one more emergency call to help find somepony's missing dog. Sincerely, your Sheriff.”

Fox groaned loudly and rubbed his face. “Oh boy, it sounds like this town got the short end of the stick.” He walked up to the door and opened it. The office was rather barren, a few awards were hung on the walls but not much else. The blinds were closed, blocking the sun from coming in the windows. There was a desk sitting in the center of the room with a pony draped over it. Her coat was a light grey and she had white hair with red highlights. She held a bottle in one hoof and a picture frame in the other. A stetson sat on her head, leaned over her eyes as she snored softly. Fox motioned for Amenadiel to go over to the windows as he held a hoof up to the door.

When they were both in position, Fox nodded and Amenadiel yanked the string to pull up the blinds. As soon as the first blind went up Fox rapidly pounded on the door, speaking with a country accent. “Sheriff! The Gryphons are invading! State of emergency! Get up! Get up!”

The pony behind the desk shot up and grabbed a dagger from under her desk, waving it around widely. “I'm ready to die, how about you Imperial fucks!?” She flinched and shielded her eyes from the light as Fox and Amenadiel burst into laughter. “Who the fuck are you schmucks?” The Sheriff asked, sitting back down in her chair and tossing the dagger on her desk. “Close those blinds.” Amenadiel shook his head and walked back around the desk to stand next to Fox. The Sheriff looked at him dumbfounded. “Shit, are we actually being invaded? The suits in Canterlot sent the fuckin cavalry.”

Fox pulled out his badge and showed it to the Sheriff. “I'm Detective Fox, EBJ. This is my partner, Detective Dragon.”

The pony scoffed and leaned back in her chair. “That's original.” Amenadiel laughed and the Sheriff continued. “What do the spooks want now? Y'all we're just here two weeks ago.”

“I'm familiar.” Fox stated. “I was on the case alongside two more Detectives and a team of CSI.”

The Sheriff was about to take a swig from the bottle before Amenadiel quickly reached out and swiped it from her hand. “Hey!” She shouted.

“Ma'am, focus.” Fox demanded. “We're here to wrap up the investigation and get on our way.”

“Might as well stay.” The Sheriff quipped as she looked down at the picture frame before lying it face down on her desk. “Ponyville, it's a strange town in a strange county. We have five hundred acres of land to cover and only five units including me. Two suits from Canterlot can help close some cold cases.”

Fox and Amenadiel shared a look before nodding in silent agreement. “We'll converse with our higher ups.” Fox stated as Amenadiel turned to leave the room.

As Fox was about to leave, the Sheriff cleared her throat. “The name's Blackjack, by the way. Sheriff Blackjack. Not my real name, but it's easier to call me Blackjack than my real name.”

“What is your real name?” Fox asked as he leaned against the office door.

Blackjack took a deep breath and spoke quickly. “Emily Blackburn Ruggedly Sly Jackal the Third.”

Nodding silently, Fox slowly turned to leave. “Sweet Celestia, that's a long ass name.” He said before shutting the door behind him.