What the Hell Do I Get Applejack?!
Rainbow Dash absolutely adored Applejack’s thighs. They were thick, soft, warm, just all around the perfect thing to lay your head on. Which was exactly what she was doing as she rested her head in Applejack’s lap, trying to take a nap.
Not that Rainbow Dash would ever freely give her opinions on Applejack’s legs. After all, she had a reputation to keep. If she were anything but suave and cool-headed when talking about her girlfriend, it’d be ruined in an instant.
Yet, Applejack’s legs were just one of the many little things Rainbow loved about Applejack. Her thighs, smile, the way she called her sugar cube, the cute way she huffed during fights that weren’t really fights. Applejack was just so perfect.
Her perfection was once again shown as Applejack’s large hands came down, combing through Rainbow’s hair.
“I’ve been thinking,” Applejack said.
Rainbow teasingly stuck out her tongue “Oh oh, should I be worried?”
When Applejack fixed her with a playful glare, Rainbow chuckled nervously.
“No but seriously, what’s on your mind?” she asked
“Well…we’ve been going out for a while now. Like five months, right?”
Actually, it was six month, seven days, and still counting… Though who was honestly keeping track at this point.
“Yeah about that long.”
“And I was wondering if we uh, hit the point where we should start thinking about getting each other Hearth’s Warming presents?”
Rainbow nodded slowly. “Is that something you want?”
“I think it’d be nice.”
“Well if you wanna do it, then let’s do it.”
“Are you sure?”
Am I sure that I want to get my girlfriend the most awesome present in the world? Who wouldn’t want that?
Rainbow shrugged. “I wouldn’t mind. It sounds pretty cool.” She tilted her chin at Applejack. “What do you want?”
Applejack snorted. “What do you mean what do you want?”
“Well like, what do you want me to buy you?”
“Uh…” Applejack cocked an eyebrow. “a gift?”
“Babe…we’re going in circles here. What. Gift. Do. You. Want. Me. To. Buy you?”
“I don’t think that’s how this works, Rainbow. Isn’t it supposed to be a surprise?”
“It is?”
“How do you and your folks do it?”
“Uh…I give my mom and dad a list of the things I want and they get them for me. Why? How do you do it?”
“We…buy gifts based on what we know about the person and try and surprise them.”
Heh. That’s a weird way of doing it.
“And you want to do it like that?”
“I mean, only if you want to.”
Rainbow waved her hand. “Hey whatever you want babe.”
“Then let’s makes it a surprise because I honestly got the perfect gift idea for you.”
Rainbow smirked. “Same here.”
Like really? How hard would it be to buy Applejack a gift?
“What the hell am I going to get her?” Rainbow Dash asked, her gaze darting between her friends.
“Uh…new work boots?” Sunset offered. “Seems like a pretty decent idea. Practical, nice price range, she probably needs a new pair for next year.”
“Or maybe a nice set of work gloves? Hers are falling apart,” Twilight added.
Rainbow groaned. “I’m not getting my girlfriend work clothes for Hearths Warming. Like, ‘hey babe I got you this stuff so you can do your chores, isn’t that romantic?’” She shook her head. “No, it has to be something special.”
“It’s Applejack we’re talking about,” Sunset said. “She’s a practical girl who has practical needs.”
Rainbow sighed. “Fine. Fine. I’ll think about it. But let’s at least try and find something better. I’m sure this mall has to have something she’ll like.”
Twilight nodded, gesturing to the mall’s directory. “There’s probably close to two hundred shops in this place. One of them will have something for Applejack.”
Rainbow walked over and began to scan the list. Most of them were easy to cross out. Rainbow knew for a fact that Applejack wouldn’t want clothes from any of these frilly places, nor would she want books, cosmetic products, electronics…
Man, the number of stores in a mall shrinks pretty freaking quickly. There are maybe ten goods stores in this whole place?
When Rainbow had finally finished filtering out the number of useless locations, she was left with only a precious few left to actual visit. Two or three clothing stores that specialized in less feminine designs, the mall’s single music shop, a video game store, and an outlet for huntsmen and survivalists.
“See anything Applejack will like?” Sunset asked.
Rainbow nodded. “A couple places.” Her gaze fell upon the name of a clothing store. “Do you think Applejack needs any more plaid?”
“In my opinion, you can never have too much plaid,” Sunset said, fiddling with the sleeves of her own plaid shirt. “Though I might be a little biased.”
Twilight snorted. “If there was a limit on plaid you blew past it months ago.”
Sunset shrugged. “What can I say. I want girls to know I’m a top.”
“And extremely gay?”
“And extremely gay,” Sunset confirmed with a nod.
Twilight grinned and stood on her tippy toes, whispering something into Sunset’s ear. Whatever she said was obviously lewd as Sunset brightened.
“What are you two talking about?” Rainbow asked.
Sunset shook her head. “Nothing, just my girlfriend being the biggest perv in the world.”
Twilight grinned. “You fell in love with me for a reason.”
“That…” Sunset kissed her on the cheek. “…is very true.”
Twilight giggled before turning to Rainbow. “So where to first?”
“I was thinking we could hit up this outdoors place? It’s the closest and everything about it just screams Applejack.”
“Oh, that’s a good idea.” Twilight said before smirking. “I also think there’s a Spencer’s nearby.”
Sunset snorted. “Can’t you act right for like five minutes.”
“You know I can’t.”
Rainbow rolled her eyes. “How about you two go shopping for a new strap, or whatever, while I check out this place. It’s not like I need you babysitting me the whole time.”
Sunset nodded. “Sounds good to me.”
Together the three of them made their way through the crowded mall. The hunting outlet, and adjacent Spencer’s, were only a few shops away from the entrance so they weren’t too hard to find.
As they arrived, Rainbow split away from Sunset and Twilight, the two groups drifting to their own separate locations.
The hunting store was named Caballerons and featured a logo of a tiger lunging at a hunter. The hunter wore a pith hat and clutched a rifle tightly in his grip.
As Rainbow entered the store, she was greeted by a sea of camouflage. Everything was coloured in the same shades of green, grey, brown, and black. The clothing, the accessories, the backpacks, the canteens, even the keychains. Which honestly seemed a little counterproductive, considering that keychains were supposed to make keys easier to find.
She slowly walked through each of the aisles, giving them a passing glance. In the back of the store she noticed a bunch of cabinets filled with firearms with a bored looking guy in his 20s manning their security. She thought about checking them out but remembered that the Apple family already had more than enough firepower. Plus, a gun didn’t really feel like an appropriate Hearth’s Warming gift, no matter what the advertisements on the display cases claimed.
Instead, Rainbow began to check out the various accessories, gliding through the rows of backpacks, camping gear, and various other tools which made survival easier. The problem was, Applejack already owned more than enough of this stuff, and all of her gear was of way better quality. She had a good outdoor backpack, she had tons of camping gear, and everything beyond that just felt tacky, unnecessary, and shoddily made.
She thought briefly about checking out the clothing but shuddered at the thought. She loved Applejack immensely but she couldn’t bear the thought of going out with someone who’d willingly wear camouflage in public.
Gods…am I becoming Rarity?
She shook her head. No, this was just common sense. You didn’t need to be Rarity to see that.
So, Rainbow gave the store a final look, and when nothing caught her eye, she left dejectedly.
As she re-entered the concourse, Rainbow noticed that Twilight and Sunset were still at Spencer’s, so she walked over to a nearby bench and took a seat. She then flipped out her phone and began to check her messages.
Her heart beat a little faster as she noticed a text from Applejack. It was just a little, “I love you”. However, it was enough to brighten her mood as she quickly replied with, “I love you too.”
With the message sent, she looked up and noticed Twilight and Sunset finally leaving Spencer’s. The two of them were close together with Twilight leaning on Sunset, chatting eagerly with her. Sunset held a bag in her free hand. Clearly their venture for a new strap had been successful.
Rainbow got up and walked over to them, smiling. “Find anything fun?”
Twilight grinned. “A couple things.”
“So, what did you get, you sinners?”
Sunset snorted. “Get your mind out of the gutter, Rainbow.” She reached into her bag and pulled out a lava lamp. “Just a little something to decorate our apartment.”
“A lava lamp?” Rainbow asked, cocking an eyebrow.
“Yeah we don’t have these in Equestria and I’ve always wanted to get one.”
“I mean, I know you smoke weed Sunset but really… a lava lamp?”
Sunset shrugged. “If you don’t like it, you can smoke somewhere else.”
“Whoa, hold up. Let’s not get hasty here.”
Sunset smirked. “Good girl.”
As Rainbow warmed at the comment, she glanced back at the bag, noticing that it wasn’t quite empty.
“So, what else did you get?” she asked, grinning.
Sunset flushed, hiding the bag behind her back. “That’s none of your business.”
Rainbow would’ve pressed the point but Twilight interrupted.
“So, did you find anything?” she asked.
Rainbow shook her head. “Nothing. Everything was just so…”
“Camouflage?” Sunset asked.
“Yeah it was like the perfect store for a twelve-year-old boy. But it’s not really the best place to get Applejack’s gift, especially not a gift as awesome as what I have in mind. I want to get her something cool, something…” She rolled her wrist. “Something super cool.”
Twilight shrugged. “Where to now, then?”
Rainbow turned and looked ahead, noticing the various store logos amongst the sea of people. Most of them meant nothing to her but one stuck out. It was called “Butch Britches”, with the name done in an aggressively plaid font. She had noticed the name earlier back at the mall directory.
“I think I see just the place,” Rainbow said, moving ahead and gesturing for the girls to follow.
Together, they delved back into the crowd and quickly made their way passed the few useless storefronts, coming to a stop outside their destination.
Sunset whistled. “Looks like my kind of place.”
Everything was plaid. Like everything. Plaid blouses, plaid shirts, plaid dresses, plaid sweaters, plaid jackets. If there was a type of clothing than this place had reinvented, remodeled, or redone it in plaid.
“I think I heard Rarity talk about this place,” Twilight said. “Said something about the designer being a lesbian from Canterda.”
Sunset snorted. “I never would’ve guessed.” She motioned to Rainbow. “Want to check it out?”
Rainbow nodded. “It’s worth a shot.”
She stepped inside and was instantly assaulted by the rich scent of pine and lumber. It was so overwhelming that she could taste it, gagging softly upon the air.
Twilight cleared her throat. “Yeah, that definitely gives off a Canterda vibe.”
“No kidding,” Sunset said.
Rainbow went off to the left, her gaze falling upon the various plaid designs. All of them looked basically the same with slight variations in terms of colour and the occasional flare which separated one model from the rest. There were several with torn sleeves, a couple with zippers instead of buttons, and even one with a massive maple leaf sewn on the back.
As she passed through the various racks and display, she glanced back at Sunset, who already had several shirts in her free hand.
“Really?” Rainbow asked, cocking an eyebrow.
Sunset grinned sheepishly. “What can I say, it’s about time that I updated my wardrobe.”
“Updated? You’re not updating shit. You’re literally wearing one of those shirts already.”
Sunset looked down at her shirt, warming as noticed that hers did in fact match one of the ones in her hand.
“Yeah, well…shut up!” She turned to her girlfriend. “Twilight, do you mind that I wear so much plaid?”
“Do I mind that my girlfriend is extremely butch? Hmm, let me think about it for a sec.” She taped a finger against her chin. “Nope, can’t say that I do.”
Rainbow shook her head and resumed browsing through the racks. Sure, everything here was totally something Applejack would wear but it was also something Applejack had plenty of. Would she really want another plaid shirt? Still, Rainbow might be able to get something else from here, though even she knew that plaid shorts or a plaid hat might be a tad bit of a fashion faux pas…
Alright you need to spend way less time with Rarity, Rainbow. She’s starting to rub off on you.
She shook her head. “Do you guys see anything that’s good gift material?”
Sunset had already wandered off, heading to the change rooms, while Twilight stared longingly after her.
“I can think of a couple things,” Twilight mumbled, her gaze fixed on Sunset.
“I meant for Applejack, you perv.”
Twilight shook her head, snapping out of her stupor. “Well, I mean anything here would work. She loves wearing this type of stuff.”
“But she already has tons of this stuff.”
“Nothing wrong with getting a couple more shirts.”
“I just…I want it to be something super special.”
Twilight placed a hand on Rainbow’s shoulder. “Rainbow, it’s your first Hearth’s Warming together. I know it probably feels super important but you got to remember, anything you get for Applejack is going to be special to her. Not because of what it is, but because you’re the one who got it for her.”
Rainbow nodded. “I know…I just…I want something that reflects how much I love her.”
Twilight reached over and pulled Rainbow into a comforting hug.
“How about we stick a pin in this place?” she offered. “We check out a few more stores, and if you don’t like anything, we can come back here and pick out a couple shirts.
Rainbow nodded. “Sounds good to me.”
The two of them broke apart before looking at the change rooms, waiting for Sunset to finish. It was only a couple minutes before she came out, now only holding two shirts.
“You find anything?” she asked.
Rainbow shook her. “There were a few things that’d be great as a backup but nothing…special.”
“Alright, do you want to try somewhere else, then?”
“If you don’t mind.”
“Hey not at all. Do you guys have someplace in mind?”
“That music store seemed pretty promising,” Twilight suggested.
“I wouldn’t mind checking it out,” Rainbow admitted. “I haven’t been there in years.”
“Sounds good to me. Just give a sec to pay for these then we can head out.”
Rainbow and Twilight nodded as Sunset walked over to the till, then purchased her shirts, then signed up for a rewards program, then was asked to fill out a survey, then…
How the hell did Rarity shop at the mall? Buying stuff took for freaking ever.
Finally, Sunset managed to break away from the cashier, shaking her head as she made her way over. “By the gods, that girl would not let me leave.”
Twilight shrugged. “She’s just doing her job.”
The three of them quickly left Butch Britches and Rainbow took an immediate right.
“Do you think Gibson’s is still the same?” Sunset asked.
Rainbow nodded. “He wouldn’t change it in a million years.”
The three of them made their way through the mall, heading towards a significantly less popular section. This area was crammed with the more obscure shops like an antique store, a vacuum cleaner repair centre, an ‘as seen on TV’ boutique, and in the very corner was…
Gibson’s.
The sign next to the entrance claimed that it was the one stop shop for everything music related. This proved more of less true as the three girls entered. The store was crammed full of musical gooda and had a very informal vibe to it, with the paint on the walls fading and the air heavy with the scent of tobacco, even though smoking indoors had been banned years ago.
The store was divided into two sections. One was full of instruments, the other recorded music.
Rainbow moved towards the former.
As she began to examine the instruments, a certain guitar caught her attention, bringing forth a nostalgic smile.
“Check it out, girls,” she said. “It’s my old guitar.”
She placed her hand against the familiar finish, tracing her fingers along the impossibly smooth surface.
It’s like the ninth grade all over again.
Rainbow couldn’t help but grin like an idiot.
Ninth grade was when her and Applejack had first gone out. Of course, neither of them would really admit it. Back then they were just two friends having a good time, but come on, it was practically a first date. They went to dinner at an Ihop, saw an action film together, and then hung out at her place. A second, ‘one-on-one hang out’, was in the works but…
Her smile faltered as she glanced at Sunset, who seemed to pick up on this as she looked away, ashamed.
Rainbow softly sighed. What did it matter? Sure, their ninth-grade fling failed but now they had a way better twelfth-grade relationship. They’d be going to college together and their first official date was way cooler anyways.
They’d gone paintballing and ended up making out in back of Applejack’s truck.
Still, Rainbow couldn’t help but lament over those lost years they could’ve been together.
As Rainbow looked at the various instruments, she shook her head. They were cool, they were memorable, they were something she’d love to get Applejack but still…still something was missing. That tiny little invisible factor which made a memorable gift into something utterly incredible.
She scrunched her face in frustration, determinedly pacing back and forth, glaring at the wall of instruments.
Why is buying a gift so goddamn difficult? I’m Rainbow Dash. I should be able to find something in no time. Why am I having so much trouble buying something for my freaking girlfriend?!
Rainbow wanted to scream.She had honestly expected to just walk into a store and find the perfect gift. Something so utterly perfect that it screamed, ‘buy me!’
She spun on her heels, glaring across the room.
“No way,” she muttered.
Within an instant, her expression softened as her eyes fell upon it.
There was the perfect gift.
Applejack looked away from the wall of sport shoes, glancing back at Rarity. “You sure she’s going to like these?”
Rarity nodded. “I’m sure she’s going to absolutely adore them.”
“You two got any objections?” Applejack asked, tilt her chin towards Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie.
Pinkie beamed. “Nope, she’s totally going to love them.”
“I think she had a pair like that back in middle school,” Fluttershy said.
“No,” Rarity said, shaking her head, “these are relatively new brand, and while they aren’t exactly my style, I don’t think you’re likely to find a gift that screams Rainbow Dash better than these.”
“I mean you could get one of those mounted trout you hang on a wall,” Pinkie said. “You know, the ones which record what you say and repeat it?” She snickered softly. “And then you can record yourself screaming Rainbow Dash, and when she opens, it screams Rainbow Dash right into her face.”
Fluttershy shuddered. “I don’t think I like this idea very much.”
“I’m sure she’ll be fine with these shoes,” Applejack said. “Now what the heck size…”
“Eight and half, wide,” Rarity listed off without pause.
Applejack chuckled. “Thank you, Rare.”
“No problem, darling.”
“How did you know that?” Fluttershy asked.
Rarity smirked. “I’ve only been making clothes for you girls, for what? Two…three years, now?”
Rainbow Dash sat in front of Applejack’s fireplace, leaning against her as they hid under a thick blanket, watching the embers spark. In each of their hands was a large mug of egg nog. Both mugs had started off full but were now nearing emptiness, slowly drained through the previous hours of small talk and intimacy.
It was Hearth’s Warming Eve, the closest they’d actually get to spending Hearth’s Warming together this year. After all, both still had families who would be hauling them away for separate outings tomorrow.
They tried not to think about it. After all, tonight was meant for just them. A private moment to share with one another. No families, no interruptions, just Rainbow Dash and her fantastic, adorable, and absolutely perfect girlfriend.
“Wanna open presents?” Applejack asked.
Rainbow nodded, glancing towards Applejack’s tree. Underneath were many presents but the two which caught her attention were a very large box wrapped in green and a more modest present wrapped in a paper with red and white stripes.
Rainbow was excited. Not only to see what Applejack had gotten her but also to find out what she thought of her gift. After all, she was sure that hers was way better than Applejack’s anyways.
Not that this was a competition or anything. Right, Rainbow?
“You wanna go first?” Applejack asked.
Rainbow shook her head. “Nah, you go.”
Applejack nodded and crawled out from under the blanket, sliding towards the tree. She grabbed the green present and lifted it, testing its weight.
“Got a nice amount of heft to it,” she said.
Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Just open it already.”
Applejack chuckled. “Fine.”
She did so delicately, slowly peeling away the tape and unwrapping the present at a snail’s pace.
When did Applejack become my grandmother?
Rainbow loudly huffed. “You’re taking forever.”
“Now, now, Rainbow. Why don’t you show a little patience? You used an awful lot of paper and I can save it for next year.”
Rainbow threw her hands into the air. “It’s paper. It literally grows on trees. It’s like seven bucks a roll.”
“And that’ll be seven dollar I don’t got to spend.”
Rainbow groaned. All she could do was watch as Applejack slowly dissected the present with the precision of a surgeon.
Somewhere in the cosmos a nebula faded, life was born on a distant rock, and dust consolidated into a star. All of this happened within the time it took Applejack to finally open her freaking present.
Underneath the paper was a dull brown box with a lid. Applejack gingerly pulled it off, and as she saw the gift, her jaw nearly dropped to the floor.
Laid upon a bed of packing paper was a light brown acoustic guitar. It was looked like the kind the Mare in Black used to play.
Applejack carefully picked it up, treating it with the same amount of care as a mother cradling her newborn. She traced her fingers along the surface, carefully plucking at one of the strings. A single out of tune note played throughout the room.
Applejack chuckled as tears watered in her eyes. “Didn’t get a chance to tune it?”
“I thought I’d give you the honours.”
She chuckled. “You always were lazy.”
Rainbow grinned. “You know me.”
“Is this…” Applejack swallowed hard. “Is this a Maretian?”
“It is.”
“You know, my momma…”
Applejack tried to say what was on her mind but only managed a little shuddering sob.
“Used to own a guitar just like that?” Rainbow said, finishing her thought.
“How…how did you know?”
Rainbow leaned over, draping an arm around Applejack. She then squeezed her close, giving her a tender little peck on the cheek.
“Believe it or not, babe, I actually do listen sometimes,” Rainbow teased. “I remember you telling me how Applebloom lost it a few years ago and you were just a mess.”
Applejack nodded, the first of her tears finally breaking free and drawing a wet streak across her face. “Felt like we lost the last piece of mom when that happened.”
“And I know this could never possibly replace that but…but I don’t know…I hope you like it?”
Applejack carefully placed the guitar aside, sniffled, and wiped her tears away. With her emotions settled, she then turned to Rainbow and threw her arms around her, pulling her into a hug.
Rainbow grunted as she found herself crushed by Applejack’s incredible strength. Yet, she couldn’t help but grin at the intensity of her reaction.
“I-I’m guessing you liked it,” Rainbow wheezed.
Applejack paused, apparently noticing that she was kind of killing her girlfriend. So, she eased back and instead kissed Rainbow softly on the nose.
“I love it. It is the most thoughtful, heart-warming, touching gift I have ever seen. I almost feel ashamed...”
Rainbow’s eyes widened. “Why?”
“I didn’t put nearly as much thought into yours.”
“Oh babe, don’t even worry about it. You’re Applejack, I know you probably got me something that’s just as awesome.
Without prompted, Rainbow wiggled away and scooched over to the tree. She picked up the other box, shaking it gently.
Something inside bounced around. It was heavy, impacting the packaging with a nice amount of heft.
It was footwear. That much Rainbow could tell. After all, she’d been getting sport shoes for the last fifteen years.
Rainbow couldn’t help but grin. She might’ve had a thing for sports shoes.
Unlike Applejack, Rainbow tore into the paper with little regard for its preservation. She shredded it in a matter of seconds, leaving behind nothing but a little pile of confetti.
Underneath was a box with the number ‘350’ on the top and the word ‘boost’ written boldly on the side.
Rainbow’s heart skipped a beat.
No way. There’s no way she actually got me a pair.
She turned to Applejack and looked her in the eye.
“Are these…are these…”
She was speechless. However, enough of her message must’ve gotten through since Applejack confidently nodded.
“It is,” she said.
Rainbow bolted to her feet, hugging the box to her chest as she danced around and giggled.
“I can’t believe it. I can’t believe I finally own a pair.”
Applejack rolled her eyes. “Stop stalling and open the damn box, Rainbow.”
Rainbow’s cheeks warmed as she once again took a seat. “S-sorry.”
She flipped open the tab and delicately pulled open the flap on the side, handling the box with the same level of care as Applejack did with the wrapping paper.
“It’s just a dang box, Rainbow,” she grumbled, fidgeting impatiently.
Rainbow held a finger, silencing her. “This isn’t just a box, Applejack. This thing is a work of freaking art. You gotta be careful with it.”
She finally opened the box and pulled out a pair of pristine white shoes. There wasn’t a single mark or blemish upon them. They were absolutely perfect.
Rainbow gasped, nearly dropping them to the floor
They were real.
“Applejack, how did you know?”
“You’ve only been talking about wanting a pair of these damn Yeezys every other day.” She smirked. “I’m guessing you like them?”
They were a brand-new pair of Canter West Yeezys. The literal equivalent of sex in shoe form. They were nirvana. The be all and end all of shoes.
Rainbow dropped them and launched herself at Applejack, pulling her into a tight hug.
“I love them! Thank you so much!”
Applejack chuckled. “I’m glad, sugarcube.” She softly kissed Rainbow on the cheek. “And thank you for the guitar.”
“I just wish my gift was as awesome as yours.”
“Sugarcube, they’re just a damn pair of…” She sighed, shaking her head. “It was, babe. It’s the best gift I could’ve asked for.”
The two of them sat there for a moment, holding onto each other in relative silence. They shared this truly personal moment. Just two girlfriends in the cherished afterglow of gift giving.
“So,” Rainbow began, finally breaking the silence. “Wanna do this again next year?”
Author's Note
Merry Christmas Everypony, Merry Christmas Rawr. I hope y'all liked this fic and thank you for sticking around until the end. As always, feedback is appreciated even if it's something as small as a thumbs up.
Also I do have a ko-fi if you realllyyyyy liked the fic.
Jingles my tin cup like a beggar from a Dicken's novel.
