"Ah....oh...y-yes..."
Discord stared, not sure how to approach this situation.
He'd stopped by once he noticed the sun setting, wanting to possibly mess with Celestia.
However, it seemed the only person that was going to be messing with her currently...was herself.
Her fingers moved dexterously, thumbing over her clit, one slipping between her folds while her other hand tugged at her left nipple, drawing blood to the surface beneath pale skin. Her eyes were closed as she lost herself in pleasure, biting her plump lips in an attempt to quiet her moans.
He couldn't seem to drag his eyes away.
Had they gotten larger since he'd last seen them up close?
And now a problem was steadily rising down south. Joy.
Those mauve colored eyes cracked open, then widened as she finally noticed him in the window. He waved awkwardly, toothily grining at her. With a rather undignifed shriek, she removed her hands from their work and frantically groped for her robe.
"Oh my gods, how long were you standing there- you- I-" She babbled as she pulled the white cotton robe around her body.
He phased through the glass and floated in casually, reclining on a chair. "Oh, long enough."
Celestia flushed. "I...you could've knocked on my door, like a regular-" She sighed and closed her eyes. "...why am I even bothering. 'Regular' isn't even a word in your vocabulary, is it?" She frowned. "What are you doing here? It's past dark, I figured you'd be in your realm by now. You never liked being out and about at night."
Discord smirked, arms folding behind his head. "Ohoho~...I'm surprised you remembered, Celly."
Celestia wrinkled her nose. "I remembered that you used to wake me at unholy hours of the night, begging to sleep in my bed because of how lonely you claimed to be."
This made the chaos spirit grin salaciously, his one disproportionate fang glinting in the candlelight. "As I recall, you never really complained~"
The princess quirked an eyebrow, and a smirk of her own graced her lips. "And as Irecall, I did. You just never listened. Mainly because you were too busy beggingme to touch you."
At that, the spirit snorted. "Oh, do get over yourself, Celly. If anyone was begging for it, it was you."
"From what I can tell, it appears that you're more or less begging for it right now..."
Discord frowned and looked down at himself, then flushed.
My my, that was a rather large bump in his slacks, wasn't it?
He cleared his throat and snapped his fingers, poofing a minature camping tent over his crotch. Celestia chuckled. "It appears you have a problem on your hands, Dissy."
Discord shot her an embarrassed glare. "And it appears you do as well. Forgive me for being crass, but it seems that those dainty little fingers of yours didn't quite make the cut at pleasing you, hm?"
The woman let out a indignant scoff. "My fingers suffice just fine, Discord."
"And I suppose 'just fine' is good enough for you, hm?"
Celestia looked away from him. "...I have few options..."
Discord gave her a once over. She'd changed. Her body, that is. A few other things as well, but that was besides the point.
She was older, now. Celestia aged very slowly, but nevertheless, she had aged, and her body had aged along with her.
This was not to say he disliked the changes her body had gone through since his millennia of imprisonment.
After all, what self-respecting spirit of Chaos would he be if he was resistant to change, hm?
He remembered her being a lot less tired and dull, that was for sure.
"As your friend, I feel it is my obligation, nay, my duty, to help you properly unwind, Celestia." There. He said it. It was in the air instead of bouncing around in his brain.
Celestia stared at him blankly. "...Are you...offering to-"
Gods, this woman.
"I'm offering to allow you to use my...many talents...to help you relax. As a friend. Helping you. Friendship help. That's right up your alley, isn't it?"
"...Discord, you could...just ask to have sex."
"Oh so now it's alright for me to be direct?"
Celestia chuckled. "And you said you didn't beg..."
Discord scowled and leaned forward indignantly. "Listen here Sunbutt, there was nothing about what I just said that was 'begging'. I said not a begging word in that entire exchange, and I'll thank you not to pretend as though there was!"
"Oh, just get over here already..."
The chaos spirit did so, teleporting in front of her, arms folded expectantly, awaiting her next 'command'.
Celestia bit her lip and sat back. "W-Well, since you claimed to wish to help me relax..."
A shit-eating grin grew on his face. "You know Celestia, you could just ask me to touch you-"
"Discord?"
"Yes, Celly?"
"Shut up and touch me before I kick you out with your balls still blue."
A pause.
"...Fair enough."
The spirit knelt before her and took hold of her calf. Celestia raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.
His hands were large enough to enclose her calf and firm enough to work away the tension in her leg. The woman let out a soft moan, eyes slipping shut as his hands kneaded her tense muscles, gleaned from ages of running an entire country, mostly by herself.
"Gods, that...that feels so good..."
A chuckle. "I can tell. Gods, when was the last time you took care of yourself, Tia?"
"...It's been a while...the kingdom never rests and neither should I..."
Discord tutted and planted a kiss on her thigh. "Oh you poor dear...in the future I'll have to stop by and give you a massage every once in a while. No one should walk around this stupefyingly tight..."
Celestia flushed at the gesture. His hands traveled up from her calves to her hips, and she let out a breathy sigh. "D-Discord-"
"May I kiss you?" He asked, voice sounding more nervous than he had meant for it to.
Celestia smiled gently. "You may."
He smiled himself and rose up enough to place his knee between her legs. A hand displaced itself from her legs to cup her cheek, and he looked into her eyes before leaning forward to claim her lips in a soft kiss.
The kiss was chaste, didn't last very long, but nonetheless, it felt good. Felt right. After so, so long...
Discord's lips smiled against her own before he began pecking a line across her cheek and to her neck, pressing kiss after kiss to her pale skin. Celestia moaned, then, her arms wrapping around his torso. His hands busied themselves with her robe, carefully unwrapping her breasts and allowing them some air.
"A-Ah...of course you were going for them next. They were always your favorite part."
Discord grinned against her neck and playfully nipped her, causing her to shriek.
He pulled back and took a hold of them, one for each hand. They had, indeed, grown bigger, as they spilled slightly out of his hands. He released one to focus on the other, fingers gripping her still pert nipple, rolling it between thumb and forefinger. Celestia sighed and whined, wriggling as he teased her.
Discord smirked and ran his other hand down the slight pudge of her stomach. He licked his lips and finally released the stiff bud from his hold, only to seal his lips around it and suck, causing the normally composed princess to arch her back and groan.
"Oh gods, Discord..."
He suckled at her, his other hand seeking out and toying with her unoccupied breast, only to switch, sucking and nibbling at the other. Back and forth, forth and back, driving his friend up the wall.
"Gods, Discord, more."
Not one to ignore requests from his lovers, Discord's hand slid down to her thigh, and carefully lifted her leg up enough to expose her to him. He pulled away from her breast with a resounding 'pop!' and a loud moan from her, now focused on her pussy. "Ah~...There it is..."
Celestia bit her lip, then maneuvered her other leg until she was finally fully spread for him.
"Thank you, my dear." Discord purred. He dragged a finger down her slightly glistening folds, causing her breath to hitch in anticipation. "So wet for me already? It must have been a while for you, Tia..."
The desire in her eyes had now been swiftly replaced with a mixture of annoyance and exasperated disgust. "Pardon? I was playing with myself earlier, in case it slipped your mind. I'm not wet solely because of you, you arrogant prick."
Discord smirked and casually thrust two fingers into her, causing Celestia to arch her back and cry out in surprise. "Yes, yes, and I suppose the way your pretty pussy just took no less than two of my fingers to the last knuckle, painlessly, had nothing to do with me either, hm?"
"I'm...s-sorry...are you trying to help me relax, or boost your already inflated ego?" She hissed, face hot and cheeks positively florid from his casual, candid dirty talk.
It was one of those things he'd always been rather good at.
"Mm, a bit of column A, a bit of column B."
"How about you put that unceasingly chatty mouth of yours to some use?"
Discord seemed to think on it, his thumb flicking up to rub at her clit, causing the princess to shudder slightly as little tremors of pleasure ran up her spine. "Hm...are you trying to say you want me to do something for you? If so, I'm afraid you didn't ask very clearly. That's a part of friendship, isn't it? Asking your friends for things in a clear manner? I can't very well read your mind, Tia..."
"Discord, I swear, upon the gods themselves, if you don't eat me out right this fucking second, I will kick you out."
Discord managed to feign an expression of apology, even though he was not at all sorry in the slightest. "Sorry, sorry. Just teasing, merely teasing, my dear." He crooned, condescendingly patting her cheek.
Celestia glared pointedly and grabbed his antler. "Get to work you vagrant."
"Oh I love when you talk dirty to me, Tia..." He purred.
"Gods, would you just-"
Discord cut her off by burying his face in her mound, long tongue immediately out and laving over her clit and teasing into her entrance. Her words withered into a choked, desperate moan, and she thrust her hips forward. "Ah-! Gods, gods, yes-"
Discord held her thighs up and apart, his thumb stroking the soft skin of her inner thigh as he dutifully ate her out, tongue lapping at and pressing down on that little bud, drawing sighs and moans from her throat.
One thing that hadn't changed, in over a thousand years, was how good she tasted. It was rather cliche to claim your partner was 'sweet'. A tiresome line used in many a trashy, bargain bin, 6 Bit erotica novel, but in this case it was somewhat true. Celestia was indeed mildly sweet, slightly salty, and delightfully robust.
You'd think he was sampling some sort of dish or beverage, instead of eating his former lover out like a starving man.
Discord moved a hand from her thigh, and again pushed two fingers into her. Celestia squealed and writhed but his considerable strength, hidden by his lanky appearance, kept her locked down in order to taste and tease her at his leisure.
He pulled away momentarily, licking his lips while continuing to pump his fingers in and out of her now dripping hole. "Mm, you taste rather nice, Tia. And the noises you're making? Music to my ears." He purred.
"Ah~...o-oh fu~ck...D-Discord, Discord, I-"
"Yes, yes, I know Tia. I'm amazing, astounding, wonderful, magnanimous, pretty godsdamned handsome, and a myriad of other positive adjectives. But don't worry, you don't have to say it. Your dripping wet cunt speaks for itself. And by that I mean it's making a lot of noise. You're fucking soaked, Celly."
Celestia growled. "K-Keep running your big mouth and you're going to be the one getting fucked."
Discord snickered. "Ooh, is that a threat or a promise? If it's the former, I'll advise you not to threaten a man with a good time. I haven't been properly railed in a while..."
"You're utterly shameless..."
A sneer. "You know it, baby. Do you still have the same wooden one?"
Celestia managed a crooked smile. "I threw it out many centuries ago. I've got a new one now. Fancy sillicone. Custom made."
"Is that so? Who would you even use it on?"
"Never hurts to be prepared. Besides, it works pretty good on me as well."
He curled his fingers, pulling a loud, sultry, drawn out moan from Celestia's throat, that admittedly made his cock twitch far more than he'd care to admit out loud.
"Gods, enough, no more-"
"Hm? What-"
Celestia shakily gripped his horn and forcefully tipped his head back (which didn't make him shudder in the slightest, thank you) until he was looking directly into her eyes, scarlet to mauve.
"Fuck me. Please."
Discord swallowed thickly, his face red and his collar and pants feeling just a mote tigher than before.
"W-Well, s-since you asked so nicely..." he stammered. He slowly rose to his feet, his fingers slipping out of her as he did so. He pushed her back until she lay flat on the bed. His eyes ran over every inch of her form. Thighs still spread, hair mused, eyes half-lidded, her nipples slightly puffy and red, and her dripping entrance practically waiting for him.
"Gods..."
"H-Hm?"
"I...y-you're...you're beautiful, Celestia."
Her cheeks flushed at that, and her eyes pointedly looked away from him, clearly embarrassed. "I-"
Discord dropped his pants, and then his underwear, leaving his cock exposed to the chilly autumn air. He leaned over her, gripping her thighs and maneuvering her legs until he rest at her entrance, the head of his cock pressed against her moistened outer lips. Celestia gasped softly, legs wrapping around his waist and a hand coming up to stroke his cheek.
"Ready?" He breathed.
She bit her lip, then nodded. He carefully inched his hips forward, easing his way into her. Celestia let out a choked noise that sounded much like a sob, and her legs tightened around him. He gasped as his length slowly parted her walls, hot and wet and squeezing him just enough to make him a bit teary eyed. "Fuck, Tia..." He whispered.
"O-Oh..." Celestia's eyes were closed and her tongue stuck out slightly.
Inch by inch, moment by moment, he moved his hips forward, until finally, at last, his cock sat fully sheated within her.
The warmth.
The tightness.
It was almost maddening, the way pleasure thrummed through him from their joining. He looked down at her, clearly trying to figure out what to say. He settled on, "May I kiss you?"
Celestia only nodded, and he readily dipped down to capture her lips, far more passionately than before. She moaned into his mouth, and he echoed her, a hand sliding beneath her head to grip it and press her even closer to him. Soon though, she pulled away with a gasp and a moan.
"Gods, move, move, please, please." She begged. "Fuck me, take me, I need-" She choked once more on her words, clearly overwhelmed.
Discord decided to listen to her. He slowly pulled out of her, until just his tip remained. Then, he pushed forward again, sinking his cock fully into her once more. Celestia groaned in a way that didn't sound distressed, encouraging him to continue. He repeated the motion. Slightly faster, slightly harder.
"More...more, please...I can take it...harder, faster, just-"
Discord groaned and began to increase his pace, steadily fucking into her, his hands running down her stomach.
"F-Fuck...fuck, Tia...so good...you're...gods, you're amazing, you're amazing, Celestia. So beautiful...every inch of you is gorgeous...you deserve this...being treated so well. I'll make you feel so good, I promise, I swear, I swear-"
Celestia moaned with every thrust that met her core, tears slowly gathering in her eyes.
"I...I'm sorry...I'm so sorry, so, so sorry. About what I did, what happened...I didn't-" He buried his face in her neck in order to hide the tears threatening to spill over. "I'm so sorry for h-hurting you."
"I f-forgive...you...I forgave you already, Discord. I...I forgive you." She whispered back.
Discord's hips stuttered slightly, before he continued pounding into her, arms embracing her and holding her body close to his own as he rocked into her, flesh slapping against flesh.
They both moaned and cried and gasped and rocked against one another, sweat glinting on their exposed skin, until at last, Celestia tightened around him and came, babbling a string of soft pleas and praises and platitudes into the chaos spirit's ear. He shuddered, his climax approaching so shortly after her own.
Finally, he himself came with a guttural growl and a hiss, filling her with a liquid warmth that made her moan aloud.
He collapsed atop her, his hips half-heartedly moving as his spent cock began to go limp and recede from her entrance.
For a while they simply laid there, basking in the afterglow.
Eventually, Celestia spoke up.
"Is...is this okay?"
He quirked an eyebrow. "Coming in you? It's fine, yes? I mean, we both know I'm not-"
"No, I mean..." She frowned. "Having sex when I know I'm never going to try to be with you again."
Discord chuckled. "I'm glad it wasn't only me. I'd much rather be friends. Less messy that way. But-" He trailed off. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry about everything. The breakup, the fight, what happened when I was freed, Tirek-"
She hushed him. "As I said, I forgave you a while ago, Discord. You've changed. You regret. And I loved you. I still do, sort of. I just can't be with you...like that, ever again."
"The feeling is mutual." He rolled himself off of Celestia and laid beside her. "Besides, I think you'd make a far better friend with benefits than a lover. You were bitchy back then. Even moreso than currently."
"And just like that, you've jeopardised your chances of staying until sunrise. Begone." She deadpanned. Discord sniggered and tossed a pillow at her, and she responded in kind.
"Oh come on, we're both filthy, Tia. At least let me bathe. And we could do it together to save on water~" He pleaded.
"Fine, fine, but afterwards you leave."
"Sure, sure, whatever you command, your Majesty. Shall I assist you in cleaning the royal ass?"
Celestia chucked another pillow at him. "You're a prick."
"You know it."
All in all, it had been a rather enjoyable sunset, one of the most enjoyable that Celestia had ever experienced. And hopefully, more like it would come in the future.
Author's Note
Platonic sex is valid.
Also this was the first het thing I've written. Go figure ¯\_(ツ)_/¯