Spike Becomes God Basically

by TerribleTy27

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Spike, Comedy
Length: 1082

When dusting the shelves, Spike stumbles upon a book.

When Spike is dusting, he finds a book on the wrong shelf. He isn't expecting much. What he finds is beyond anything his imagination could conceive.
~|~|~|~
Written based off a prompt a friend gave me.

Published 2019-01-08 13:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-01-08 13:40:01 UTC

The Book of Life

If you'd have dusted off the books as long as Spike had, you'd have noticed the little patterns too. The odd purple and yellow instruction manual in between the books about quantum physics. The weird magazine that always ends up alongside the encyclopedia. The pencil on the floor that always seems to get back there no matter how many times he puts it away.

This, Spike had decided, did not belong to the pattern.

It stood out with a vivid red that dwarfed the dull blacks and greys next to it, like the stars to the sun on a bright summer morning. On top of that, it was big. So big, that when Spike had unconsciously taken it out of the shelf for a read, he quickly found himself buried. Rolling his eyes, he pushed the book off himself.

"The Book of Life," he read the title aloud.

"This is so going to be an encyclopedia," he said, a mounting horror growing in the pit of his stomach.

With a mighty heave, he pulled the book cover open.

'Chapter 1, in which the universe is made- nope,'

Spike shut the book. It was clearly an encyclopedia, and a bad one at that. Several of the pages were blank. Shaking his head, he picked up the book and heaved it into a little alcove inside the bookshelf. No one but him knew about this alcove.

Wait, why was he hiding this again? Twilight might at least find some use-

"Spike, have you finished your chores?" Twilight called out from the other room.

Ignoring the book, he jumped up. Time to get the food ready.

~|~|~|~

'1:05'

Spike stared at the clock, his eyes hollow. He was still awake, and it was starting to bother him. All night the book had been bothering him. Taunting him with visions.

Suddenly, he jumped up. Careful not to wake Twilight, he walked over to her desk to light a candle. Candle lit, he waltzed down the stairs and next to his bookshelf.

Why was he so obsessed with this book?

His hands moved back and forth, an internal debate clouding his senses.

Using as much speed as he could muster, he flicked through the book. A dawning sense of horror grew over him as he saw the titles.

In which Nightmare Moon is vanished.

In which there are too many tickets.

'Chapter 2857, in which Spike sneaks downstairs to read this book-'

What on Celestia's good green earth?

As Spike read through the past couple minutes distilled into word form, a strange quirk in his lips started to develop.

He looked down at the floor.

The pencil was still there.

And there were many blank pages.

He grinned.

~|~|~|~

"Now children, you know what chapter it is, right?"

Cheerilees sweetened honey voice rang out across the schoolhouse. The group of excited foals stopped to think over the question. One yellow colored pony named Blue Berry raised her hand. Cheerilee nodded at her.

"It's the anniversary of our enlightenment, right?"

"Correct! Ten points to Gryffindor!"

Blue Berry gave a quick high five to her sister in Gryffindor, Sweet Bun, before allowing Cheerilee to continue.

"Yes, it was on this day that our omnipotent and omniscient ruler, Spike the Great –" At this, everyone stopped to put their hooves to their heart and mutter 'May he reign forever' "– gave us the truth,"

One students hoof popped up.

"Yes, background pony unworthy of a name or description?"

"Um-"

Cheerilee slammed her hoof onto the ground.

"What have we said about this?" she spoke, an edge of anger cutting her voice.

"Miss, I–"

Cheerilee stomped her hoof into the ground even harder, causing small cracks to form along the floor.

"Background pony, you know the rules! Under Spikequestrian law, it's illegal for unimportant fillies like yourself to show! You've got to tell!"

The background pony asked what the truth was. Cheerilee gave a sigh of relief.

"The truth of the multiverse! In doing so, he made it so we can do things like this!"

Cheerilee proceeded to explain all the amazing things she can do now.

"Wait, what just happened?" Blue Berry asked.

"I just told you," Cheerilee said, winking.

Blue Berries eyes widened as she realized she had remembered the past couple of minutes, yet it only felt like-

"One sentence?" Cheerilee finished.

Blue Berry felt her mouth gape open.

"Some of the truly advanced, such as myself, can read the chapter in real time," Cheerilee said calmly.

"Wait, how does that make any-"

"Oh, a time skip is coming up children! Get ready, we're going to the palace of Lord Spike for a field trip!"

~|~|~|~

"Woah," said Blue Berry, eyes as open as frying pans.

A grand marble hall stretched before the class, seeming as if it stretched on for miles. At the very end, A massive throne stood.

On top of the throne, the sexiest, awesomest,most badass dragon of all time sat. The chapters had been kind to him, that was for sure. He was still small, and he hadn't changed much. ~~What had changed was ponies perception.~~ ~~what had changed was his looks~~ He was cool.

"Who dares?"

At the sound of his voice, half of the females in the room faintednoneofthemwerehurt. Interestingly, everyone in the room was female, besides Spike. Gently, almost reverently, he pulled out a large red book.

Blue Berry caught a view of the last page of the book. It looked as if there was no room left. Just as she began to ask

Then, a new book appeared. The book had a shimmering vivid red, nothing like the dull and beaten crimson of this book. Spike tossed this book aside

~|~|~|~

Spike tossed the short stories aside, slapping his hand to his face.

"Twilight, Fluttershy's writing bad fanfics again!" he called out, his voice echoing across the library. Under his breath, he muttered, "Freakin' Everfree marijuana man,"

As Twilights distinctive hoof-steps reached the sound of Fluttershy, she let out a small groan.

"Lemme see," said Twilight.

Spike nodded and picked up the short story. As she read through it, a growing look of confusion spread across her face. Once she finished, she dropped the pages to the ground.

"Fluttershy."

Twilight looked her in the eye.

Fluttershy stared back, stony faced.

"Whatever you're on, I want some."

Author's Note

It's that Everfree marijuana man. Make ponies do some crazy s***.

You wanna hit this?