The King of Spades

by Frostbytten

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Science Fiction, Profanity, Adventure, Discord, Violence, Princess Celestia, Crossover, Main 6, Original Character
Length: 2774

A human from a realm of gods and magic finds himself in a strange new world. Cast away from everything he knows, will he find a new life?

Damien Smith is many things. Ex-Gangster, Hacker, Killer, and Messenger. One word he'd never think to use to describe himself is "Hero." But after a final confrontation with a great evil leaves him stranded in a new world, with a new body, will he be able to find a way to finally forgive himself for the sins he's committed, or will he simply remain bitter for the rest of his life? Perhaps the new friends he meets can help him along his journey.

A/N: I apologize for the short summary, but I've never been the best at these.

Note: This story begins during the Season 2 pilot.

Published 2019-02-02 10:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2019-02-02 10:50:02 UTC

Endings and New Beginnings

“Ah, welcome to my sanctum, honored guests! I’ve been expecting you for quite some time now.” The faux-genteel voice that greeted Damien Smith and his allies came from the top of the makeshift throne in the center of the room. The owner stood slowly, offering them a small bow, along with a condescending smirk.

“Literally no one wants to talk to you, Khuzen, you sorry excuse for a floppy dick soft walnut soggy pancake.”

Alek was as eloquent as always. Khuzen tutted in response, shaking his head in disappointment.

“Come now, hero. Have you forgotten your manners? Even that irritating gnat you call a goddess shows proper courtesy.”

“You're so full of shit you could give a cesspool a run for its money.” Damien gave Alek a glance at that, raising a questioning eyebrow.

“And whatever gave you the impression I was speaking to you, puppet of chaos?”

“Do I look like I give a flying three-way fuck who you're talking to, mister Hentai-waiting-to-Happen?” Alek bared his teeth in a feral smile. “I happen to know last time she was here, she horked up a massive ball of She-Knows-What onto your lap that disrupted your form for a century. How does it feel, being bested by someone lesser, Sir fuckboy crunchwrap supreme?” Damien let out a sigh at this, mentally preparing himself for a long snipe-fest. Once one of those two got started, it was almost impossible to get them to stop.

“As...charming as your companion is, you have been unnaturally silent.” Khuzen ignored Alek’s stream of profanity to point a lazy finger at Damien. “Have you no hate-filled words left? No more promises of destruction or my inevitable defeat?” The self-proclaimed God of Destruction’s voice leaked arrogance and scorn. Damien shrugged in response, gathering power to himself.

“What’d be the point? I’ve already said everything I needed to. Anything else is a waste of breath.” He rolled his neck as he spoke, subtly crouching down into a fighting stance as he did. “So, we gonna talk or fight? If you two wanna try to create some more unresolved sexual tension, by all means, don’t let me distract you.”

Khuzen let out a dramatic sigh in response. “And here I hoped you held more class than that boor beside you. How disappointing.” He lifted his arm, gathering orbs of Void energy into his palm with a bored look on his face. “Since you offer me no entertainment, I suppose I might as well obliterate you now. You should be honored. Your sacrifices will help me usher in a perfect utopia, once I wipe this pitiful slate clean. I will be sure to-” A gunshot interrupted his speech, Khuzen’s head snapping backwards as the bullet struck between his eyes.

“You talk too much.” Damien lowered the smoking pistol in his hand, turning to Alek with a roguish smirk. “You ready to finish this?” He could feel the borrowed power of his Goddess thrumming beneath his skin, begging to be unleashed on his foe. His ears were filled with the sounds of grinding gears and phoenix song.

Alek opened his mouth. What came out was an oceanic roar that shook the very foundations of the building as the strange non-colors of the Void wrapped around him in wisps, swirling in a sickening dance.

“En Guarde, fuckboy!”

“Whelps! Spineless curs! Who are you to defy a GOD?!”

Alek barked out a short, sharp laugh, his voice echoing unnaturally as he drew on the Lord of Chaos herself.

“Messengers.”

Damien let out ragged breaths, turning his head to the side to spit out a gob of blood. He’d lost track of how long they’d been fighting. A glance around the shattered remains of the Tower revealed that one way or another, it would end soon. All three of them were on their last legs. Alek had a defiant snarl on his face, while Khuzen’s was a rictus of rage and madness. The Messenger of Jixiu forced himself back onto his feet. One of his eyes was malfunctioning, sending sparks into his vision. He was fairly certain that a number of bones had been broken as well.

Still, he pushed the agony to the side. He had to finish the job.

“Insignificant gnats! You haven’t won! I’ll destroy you! Obliterate everything you hold dear!” Khuzen ranted and raved, stomping in a manner similar to a petulant child.

Suddenly, everything seemed to slow, then stop. Damien felt as if he were moving through molasses.

That was the first sign.

As they struggled to draw breath, the air around Khuzen began to bubble and bulge and twist, warping in ways that air should not be able to do.

That was the second sign.

Something was coming, putting pressure on the diamond-strong barrier between here and the Void.

Which in and of itself was terrifying, as the Naughtweavers - the guard dogs of the fringes - normally took great exception to something attempting to leave. So, it was either tiny enough to escape their notice, or -

Large enough to subdue the hounds.

Damien watched as a limb pushed through-

And something in his mind sang.

It was not normal song of the Void, discordant and jarring. This spoke of -

Of Home. Home. Safety, protection, shelter.

That was the third, and last, sign.

The limb withdrew. A vast, unending eye, the same non-color of the void itself, peered through the gap it had torn.

And a thunderous sigh echoed through the hall.

Cularithur. How is it that whenever there is trouble, I find you at the center of it.

Damien and Alek were driven to their knees at the power in that voice, and - surprisingly - Khuzen was struggling to stay upright as well. The rage on his face had long drained away, replaced with fear and utter panic. “No! NO! You won’t take me back! I won’t let you!”

You do not have a say in the matter. I thought your time on this plane would calm you - instead, it has only made you worse. It will never be said that I do not fix the mistakes of my younger siblings.

“Fine!” Khuzen spat the word like a curse, then turned to Damien with a cruel smirk. “But I’m not going alone!” He rushed towards the Messenger with a maddened cackle, grabbing onto him and almost crushing him to his body. Then, before anyone could stop him, he hurled himself into the crack in Creation, dragging Damien into the Void alongside him.

Upon passing through the tear, Damien’s human mind immediately shut down.

The Void was something that no mortal should experience; it had driven Gods and Messengers alike to madness. The best way his consciousness saw to deal with it was to not.

He drifted, floating through endless nothing; had he been conscious, he would have been incredibly bored.
If there was a single blessing, it was that the warped and twisted creatures of the place between dimensions ignored him completely. Dreamers often slipped into the Void; they were typically gently nudged back by the more sentient inhabitants, who found them to be a disruption and an annoyance.

No such luck for Damien.

There was no telling how long he drifted until - something - hooked into the collar of his shirt.

Distantly, he heard a cry of triumph.

“Oh my~! I have myself a biiiig one!”

His consciousness returned to him as he felt himself being towed; he refused to open his eyes, however, until a clawed talon poked as his cheek.

“My my! What in the world do we have here~?”

The creature that stared back at him was one of the oddest amalgamation of creatures Damien had seen in quite some time.

He had the head of a horse, with two horns branching from his skull, poking through a floppy fisherman’s hat - a deer antler and a blue goat’s horn, a white tuft of a beard, and a singular fang poking from his lip. The rest of his body was equally as strange. In one taloned paw he held a fishing pole, the line of which Damien could feel hooked into the collar of his shirt, and wore a fisherman’s vest to match the hat.

“What a strange fish.” The creature poked his cheek again, causing Damien to wince. “I haven’t seen a human in a long, long time!” The creature reached behind his head and worked his hook free, reeling in the line as Damien tried to make sense of what he was seeing.

“Where am I…?” He croaked, blinking.

“Why don’t you find out for yourself?”

Before Damien could react, the creature put down his pole, picked him up, reeled back, and shouted something that sounded suspiciously like “YEET!” before hurling him through another rip.

Princess Celestia did her best to keep a worried sigh from escaping her muzzle as she travelled the streets of Canterlot. Discord had escaped his prison due to the actions of a trio of fillies. While this was worrying enough on its own, the self-proclaimed God of Chaos had yet to actually do anything, which was usually a sign that the spirit was planning something that might well rock Equestria to its core.

Before she could start worrying herself sick wondering what her enemy might be plotting, the solar princess took a deep breath in through her nose, before releasing it slowly through her mouth. Worry wouldn’t help her right now. All she could do was hope her faithful student and her friends would be up to the task before them. No matter how much she wished she could protect her little Twilight, she was a grown mare now, and a seasoned hero in her own right. It wouldn’t be fair to her to try to coddle her forever.

Celestia was cut off from her thoughts when the very air around her seemed to warp and twist, strange un-lights filling her vision as...something began to crack in the sky above. With a great howl of displaced air, a rent opened in the fabric of reality. It was open for only a few moments, long enough for something to come hurtling out of it, before it sealed itself just as violently as it had appeared. Celestia watched on with curiosity as the shape fell closer, which soon warped into horror as she saw that it appeared to be a pony. She leapt into the sky, spreading her wings and racing towards the unfortunate soul. Worry and fear lent her speed as she raced to catch them before they hit the ground.

She almost didn’t make it. At the very last moment, only a few feet above the ground, she managed to wrap her forelegs around the pony.

The impact almost drove her to the surface.

With a soft sigh, the princess landed and set the pony down to look at who she had just rescued. Her eyes widened as she took in the poor state of the stallion before her. He was a unicorn with a silvery coat and a black mane, styled short and messy.

The thing that immediately grabbed her attention, however, was the assortment of wounds covering his body. Cuts and gashes ran along his barrel and legs, along with what appeared to be several burns. Two of his legs were twisted in ways that she knew meant a break, and one of his eyes seemed to have been torn out, leaving a bloody, gaping hole in its place. His breathing was ragged and laboured, each breath accompanied by a soft, wet gurgle.

Without a second thought, the Princess of the Sun wrapped the pony in her forelegs and flew as fast as her wings could carry her, heading for the nearest Hospital.

The day had been so normal.

Doctor Coffee Bean was on her third mug, examining the fifth form and checking on her patients, when all of a sudden, Celestia Herself came rocketing in with one of the worst cases of what the fuck happened to you she’d seen in Tartarus knew how long.

Dr. Coffee took one look and shouted for her nurses.

In a whirlwind of activity, her staff - bless their hearts - had a room ready and waiting for her new patient.

And what a patient he was.

The stallion’s silver-grey coat was dyed with a liquid that she’d be hard-pressed to define as ‘blood’; it moved sluggishly, was black, and smelled disturbingly like oil.

Not only that, but there were odd...protrusions from his withers, where the wings of a pegasus would normally be. She tapped them gently, out of curiosity.
They were metallic in nature, which she silently added to ‘List of Questions to Ask’, along with ‘How, why, who, when…’.

It was an expansive list.

The first thing she did was a quick scan with her magics; not only were the stallion’s forelegs broken, they were nearly shattered. He had a sucking wound, one of his eyes was gone, and he was losing blood through a variety of lacerations on his body. Really, it was easier to define what wasn’t wrong with him, she reflected as she washed her hooves and pulled on gloves.

The nurses had already started an IV and applied an oxygen mask, leaving her free to start working.
The sucking wound was the first thing she worried about. After making a small incision and inserting a tube into the chest cavity, she began to stitch the ghastly wound shut, then dealt with the bigger lacerations, working her way down the list of severity.

The eye was completely ruined, and would have to be removed - or so she thought. When she began to prep the area, she saw that the same material that his wing was made from lined the socket.

She ended up just bandaging it. Some things were questions for later.

The bones were the easiest part, and the one she left for last. The nurses had straightened and splinted them, and now it was her turn.

Focusing her magic, she began to piece together one shattered leg, then the other. It was like putting together a puzzle, except if she misplaced a piece, it was a lawsuit.

Luckily, she was very good at her job.

Once the bones were in order, she held them in place while the nurses put his forelegs in casts.

She pulled off her gloves with a sigh, tossing them in the trash, before nearly being bowled over by a white mass.
Celestia, Princess of the Sun, was in her operating room.

She was in her operating room, hovering over her patient, asking frantic questions as her wings fanned over the stallion protectively-

“Hey!” Coffee Bean shouted, shocking the princess into stunned silence.
“This is a sterile environment! You can't be in here!” She hurried over to Celestia, adding a quick “Princess.” out of belated respect.
When she didn't move, Coffee placed herself between Celestia and the patient and began hustling her out. “Sorry Your Highness, but we don't know if his immune system is weakened or compromised or not and -” she babbled explanations as she practically pushed Celestia from the room, her worry for the unicorn overriding the sense that marehandling a member of royalty was fairly high up there on her List of Very Terrible and Bad Ideas.

“But -” Celestia began to argue.

“Princess, I can’t answer any questions until the patient wakes up and gives consent.” She interrupted gently. “I’m sure you’re aware of the laws regarding this sort of thing and the oaths doctors like me give.”

That seemed to stymy the Princess, who let out a long, heavy sigh.

“Perhaps you could wait in the room nearby?”

That seemed to perk the solar princess back up, and she gave an eager nod at that. "Yes, that sounds like a good idea. I apologize for any trouble I've caused you, doctor." Celestia dipped her head to the stunned doctor and made her way into the waiting room, siting down on one of the comfortable chairs.

Within a few minutes, she had risen to her hooves and begun pacing. It was going to be a long, agonizing wait.

Author's Note

So, here it is! I've been on hiatus for a few years now, and it feels so good to get back into the swing of things. I can't promise steady updates for this, but I will be doing my best not to let this story die like all the others. Thank you all for reading, and I hope you enjoy!