Bagpiperix in Ponyville

Twilight yawned, stretching and flaring her wings, and blinked owlishly at the sun coming in through the windows.

Then she checked the clock.

“Phew,” she sighed in relief, getting out of bed with a clatter of hooves “I'm not late up after all.”

“Morning, Twilight!” Spike called up from the kitchen.

“Good morning, Spike,” Twilight replied, smiling. She glanced at the clock again, and began reciting a mental list. “Morning wash, four minutes...”

Seven point five minutes later, Twilight came down the stairs with her mane still damp.

“Everything okay?” Spike asked, putting some toast down in front of her.

“Of course,” Twilight replied. “I've adjusted my morning routine to allow for time to do my wings, so everything's working out nicely.”

Spike chuckled, smearing some jam on his own toast, and then stuck a couple of little sapphires in it.

“Spike, remember, don't overuse those,” Twilight warned. “I don't want you getting fat.”

“Of course,” Spike shrugged, and ate half the toast in a single big bite.

Twilight sighed, and began spreading butter on her own toast.

“Oh-” Spike began, then swallowed. “Oh, I was going to mention – I saw something happening on one of the roads into town. Some kind of caravan or something, lots of ponies and carts coming up the road.”

Twilight frowned. “Well, I hope it's not like that Diamond Dog from last week who wanted to see the 'book pony Princess'.”

Spike chuckled. “Hey, it worked out fine.”

He finished off the toast. “I do kind of wonder-”

There was a clatter as the door swung open.

“Hey! Guys!” Pinkie Pie said, leaning through the door from the upper lintel. “There's a circus coming!”

“So that's what it was...” Spike nodded to himself.

“Pinkie?” Twilight said, looking at her upside-down friend, then wrote it off as Pinkie Being Pinkie. “So it's a circus… I don't think I've seen one of them...”

Pinkie gasped. “You haven't seen a circus!?”

She dropped to the floor, twisting around to land in a pose. “Well, I guess that means it's time to fix that! We'll all go to the circus!”

“Pinkie-” Twilight began, confused.

Spike waved a claw. “Forget it, she's rolling”

Pinkie promptly vanished in a cloud of dust. Faintly, they could hear her voice.

“The circus! The circus!”

Twilight sighed, and pointed a hoof at Spike. “Spike, take a note. Set aside the next week or so for circus things, just in case.”

“Here they come,” Pinkie sang, bouncing past Carousel Boutique. “They're new in town, it's the greatest show around~”

As she went off down the street, Rarity opened the door – half a dozen pins in her mouth and a design sketch floating next to her. “Pinkie? Was that you?”

“'cause the circus is coming to town!”

Applejack jumped at the sound, nearly missing her buck. As apples rained down around her, she looked up. “What in tarnation-”

Pinkie's head appeared out of a half-full barrel. “There are clowns – jugglers too! There's so much to see and do!”

She vanished again, sending apples bouncing out of their container.

Applejack stared, then sighed. “Consarn it...”

“Now the circus is coming to town!” the pink party pony proclaimed, gathering up Angel Bunny, three chickens and a startled Fluttershy in a hug.

“The what?” the pegasus asked.

“The lions roar – elephants will dance! Nothing could ever be so grand!” Pinkie continued, her words making Fluttershy look a little more interested. “Don't-”

“-be left behiiiind! They're startin' right on time!”

Dash turned over in her cloud bed, mumbling something.

“Cause the circus is coming to town! (Gotta see it!) Cause the circus is coming to town!”

Finally pushed beyond endurance, Rainbow Dash stuck her head out of the window – seeing Pinkie Pie singing to her from the ground, loudly enough that most of Ponyville could probably hear it.

“Pinkie!” she shouted back. “It's too early for this!”

“Here they come!” Pinkie sang, beginning a second round of the entire song so far.

Dash sighed.

A few hours later, Pinkie was happily trotting around the field just next to Ponyville proper – one the circus had hired out for the purpose of their show.

“Hm-hm~,” she hummed to herself, turning this way and that to see all the sights – from a pony with a strange-looking musical instrument to one wearing four long stilts, the performers were already practicing, and the big top wasn't even up yet!

Turning a corner, she spotted someone who didn't look busy.

“Hiya!” she said, giving them a broad smile – from right in front of their face, so they knew she was being really friendly! “I'm Pinkie Pie, Ponyville's Premier Parade P-arranger! Any idea how I can book tickets?”

The circus hand looked a bit startled, and stepped back – revealing the bouncy-ball cutie mark on his flank. “I'm afraid I'm not sure, miss… I don't know if the ticket office is open yet.”

Pinkie pouted, saddened, then spotted someone through a gap in the tents.

“Aww… and ooh, hey! I see something that would have made me go GASP if I was near enough! See you later, Mister Circus Pony!”

Leaving the slightly bewildered pony to his own devices, Pinkie cantered across to the pony she'd seen. “Nice to meet you again!”

The unicorn raised her pointy hat, and regarded Pinkie Pie with something like resignation. “Ah. Trixie did wonder if you would show up.”

“Oh, you're still talking all third-person-y, fun,” Pinkie giggled. “Anyway, hiya! Nice to meet you again! We did meet before, right?”

“...yes, we did,” Trixie confirmed.

She flourished her cape. “But not in my current guise! For I am no longer the Trixie you once knew – I have become the new magic act for the greatest circus show on Equestria!”

“Wow-eroonie!” Pinkie beamed. “This calls for a celebration!” She took a deep breath, ready to launch into song.

Trixie put a hoof on Pinkie's muzzle. “No, Trixie will be fine thank you.”

Pinkie nodded, no less eager, and waited until Trixie took the hoof away. “So! Do you know where we can buy tickets?”

The showmare frowned, thinking, and tapped a hoof on the floor. “Trixie is afraid she does not know… but she knows who might know! Now, where's the ringmaster...”

Her pointy hat lit up slightly with the backglow from her horn, and a nearby pony jumped as he felt a hoof tap him on the shoulder.

“Excuse Trixie,” Trixie said, loudly. “But there is a pony here who wishes to purchase tickets.”

“Oh, it's you,” the ringmaster said, cantering over, and Pinkie looked him up and down with interest.

He was an Earth Pony, wearing a tam o'shanter and a plaid waistcoat complete with tails, and his cutie mark seemed to be a Big Top fully set up with a fluttering flag at the top.

“There's a dreadful rush going on,” the pony sighed, shaking his head. “I don't know if we're going to be ready in time at all – there's all sorts of mistakes going on. Some of the crewmembers are lost – we're already behind schedule – we're going to have to cancel some of the acts entirely – I don't know what to do!”

He fixed Trixie with a look of desperation. “Please tell me you know what to do!”

Trixie took a step back, suddenly nervous. “Uh – I – that is, Trixie-”

“I know what to do!” Pinkie interrupted brightly. “This is just the kind of episode I like!”

Trixie swung her gaze to Pinkie. “Pardon?”

“Nothing,” Pinkie replied, giggling. “Anyway – my friends will help out! Twilight's a super-duper-organizer, she'll help sort things out! And my other friends and I can do the acts!”

The ringmaster looked at her as if he was a drowning stallion tossed a lifebelt. “You will?”

“Yupp-eroonie!” Pinkie said, nodding emphatically.

She was sure her friends would all love to join in with the circus!

“...seriously, Pinkie...” Twilight said, giving her Party Pony friend a moderately reproving glare. “You could at least have asked us before signing us all up for this...”

“But it's the Circus, Twilight!” Pinkie stressed, as they trotted up to the flap of the Big Top. “I could barely sleep last night, I was so enthusiastic!”

She waved her hooves. “I was all, ooh, I can't wait to do circus-y things!”

“I could wait to do circus things,” Rarity said. “In fact, I might rather not do them at all...”

Applejack sighed. “That's as may be, Rarity, but ah guess they are ponies in need. So we should help 'em out.”

She chuckled a little. “Besides, might be a bit of fun an' all...”

The conversation paused as they reached the opening of the tent, and one by one the six ponies (and Spike, who was thoroughly unimpressed by the whole thing) filed through the flap.

Most of the ground inside the tent was empty, save for a few ponies already rehearsing their acts. A few others were attempting to haul a set of bleachers to the opposite end of the tent, clearly not accustomed to the weight of the seats. As Twilight and her friends looked about, there was something in particular that stood out to them, though.

"Uh, guys? Are circuses always this... plaid?" Rainbow questioned.

Indeed, many of the circus's employees seemed to be wearing some form of attire, either a suit or hat, or were utilizing some sort of paraphernalia that had a bright red color criss-crossed with lines of color.

"Well, I don't think I've ever heard of a circus using such an... Interesting choice." Rarity responded, watching as a pony wobbled by on a plaid rubber ball.

“Yeah, it's totally not cool,” Dash agreed, nodding to herself. “What kind of pony would wear that kind of clothes if they didn't have to?”

Twilight hid her muzzle with a hoof, smirking. “Didn't Daring Do's assistant once-”

Dash coughed. “Uh… yeah, now I come to think of it...”

She shook her head. “Anyway! What kind of thing do we have to do here?”

“I'm more confused by what they're already doing here,” Spike pointed out. “That high wire stuff looks scary, and so does that bouncy trampoline thing they're using as a safety net… are they inflating some kind of balloon?”

Pinkie followed his claw, then giggled. “Silly Spike! That's just what circuses do – they're silly to be fun! And all of this is just a way of tartan things up!”

Twilight and Rarity groaned. None of the others seemed to get the joke.

“...anyway,” Twilight decided. “What kind of thing do we need to do? Where's the ringmaster?”

“He's over there!” Pinkie said, loudly enough that the ringmaster in question looked up in surprise.

Pinkie bounded over to the shocked stallion, grabbing him by the hoof and dragging him along the grass back towards her friends. "Here we are, mister ringmaster sir! I'm sure you'll just love meeting my friends, they're really excited to help out!" Applejack and Fluttershy gave a look, unsure if Pinkie really knew what 'really excited' meant.

The Ringmaster readjusted himself, patting the dirt off of his waistcoat as he stepped up to the others. "Ah, well, it's good to meet you. I'm not sure how much Pinkie told you, but things have been an awful mess. Many acts have gotten lost on the roads here and I don't think they're going to get here at all, let alone on time for the show! And as you can see, the acts that are here..." His voice trailed off as there was a loud clatter, the ponies who were carrying the bleachers having dropped it on the tail of a pony who had recently been balancing dishes, and who was now picking up several broken shards of porcelain.

"Oh my, that is awful!" Fluttershy said, watching as a highwire artist shifted her gaze to the crash below, only to wobble and slip a moment later. Twilight gave a small nervous laugh.

"Well, it could be worse, right?" Her words were immediately followed by the sound of a loud crash outside. "Um... what exactly did you need help with?"

The ringmaster coughed, adjusting his waistcoat with a nervous gesture, and cleared his throat. “Right. Ahem… let's see.”

He tilted his head up slightly, trying to recall from memory. “Well… our head clown appears to have run off to the Bahamares-”

“Dibs!” Pinkie said, beaming. “I always wanted to be a clown! Ever since my dear grandmama told me about how much fun the circus was, I said to myself-” Pinkie's voice deepened. “Pinkie, you'll always kick yourself if you never try to be a clown!”

“She ain't one now?” Applejack asked Rarity quietly, getting a shrug.

“Well – that's something,” the ringmaster said, with a sigh. “Now, then… I believe our animal tamer eloped with the fearsome griffin we had, and that means we've lost both of them. We've lost our trapeze artist – he went flying off into the distance and never came back – and the strongmare's gone into personal training.”

He nodded at the bleachers, where several ponies were trying to coordinate moving the seats again. “As you can, uh, see...”

There was a ripping sound as one of the costumes parted slightly, and Rarity winced.

“...we also need some new costumes,” the ringmaster finished.

Just to cap things off, the tightrope walker fell off. There was a paaaarp as they landed on the trampoline thing.

“It kind of sounds like this place has a bad case of bad luck,” Spike said. “Twilight, are you sure we shouldn't just give it up?”

Pinkie looked extremely sad at the very idea.

“...well, uh...” Twilight began, looking from the despondent Pinkie to the nervous ringmaster. “I… well, we're kind of invested now. So I think we should continue.”

“Oh, thank you so much!” the ringmaster said, sighing with relief as Pinkie Pie got out the pom-poms and began celebrating. “So… is there anyone who can do any of those?”

"Well, if it's a costume redesign, I'll be more than happy to help. A show without the proper style will simply not do! Besides, I'm sure I can come up with something a bit easier on the eyes, if you will pardon my manners," Rarity said. The ringmaster opened his mouth to speak, though he was unable to begin before Rainbow Dash interjected.

"Pffft, I bet that old trapeze artist can't do half the things I could do! I could even do it with my wings tied behind my back!" She boasted, puffing out her chest and smirking proudly. "Though you better not try and stuff me into one of those silly looking things, Rarity." She narrowed her eyes, pointing towards the plaid suited high wire pony.

"Ah suppose ah could help out with that strong mare act. Heck, I can lift more than Big Mac on a good day," Applejack suggested.

All eyes turned to Fluttershy, who's muzzle scrunched a bit. "Uh... are you sure you need help with the show? I-I mean, I could always just give... moral support... from backstage... or back home, maybe..." Her eyes swiveled up to the bright spotlights one pony was testing out.

"Aw, come on, Fluttershy, you've tamed scarier things than some ol' griffon! Just bring Harry along, I bet the audience hasn't seen a pony stick their head in a bear's mouth before!" Spike said, chuckling a little to himself.

"I... um... I s-s-suppose I could try..." Fluttershy responded, hoping her voice was too low to be heard.

"Oh, thank goodness, he was one of our headliners, if we didn't have a replacement I'm not sure what we'd do!" the ringmaster responded, which only made Fluttershy go a bit pale. "Now, if you two could come with me, I think we ought to let the others get to practicing." The ringmaster pointed to Rarity and Twilight, though as he turned to head out, Twilight turned back to Spike.

"Spiiiike, don't you think you should help out too?"

"What? And have to put on one of those silly get-ups? No way!" Twilight gave a small glare, to which the dragon gulped in response. "But she said all the acts were taken! I mean, I can't do an act if there's no more room, right?"

"Oh, I almost forgot, we could always use another hand selling tickets and popcorn before the show!" The ringmaster turned around. Spike's expression fell to a rather grumpy look.

"Great."

“And… go!” Rainbow said, launching herself off the crossbar of the trapeze.

She did four flips, three rolls, an Immelmann turn and was getting ready for a double backflip when Twilight called out. “Dash!”

“What?” Dash asked, halting in mid-air and hovering there so she could answer Twilight. “What's wrong with it?”

“It's just...” Twilight waved a hoof. “You're kind of – well – my point is, it's not really very impressive for a pegasus to be flying.”

Dash rolled her eyes. “Fine, Twi. I won't use my wings, will that make you happy?”

Twilight nodded. “That should be okay – I mean, it might be hard for ponies in the audience to be sure of that, though. Maybe you should tie them up, like you did for the Running of the Leaves?”

“Guh,” Dash grumbled. “Fine...”

She crossed her forelegs in a mild sulk. “This better not make me look uncool though.”

“So, here's what I was thinking,” Rarity said, using her telekinesis to spread out a swatch of cloth with jagged stripes on it. “This would work well for all the acts with pizazz, verve, flair – it makes them be about the sheer energy of the performance! I'm thinking it would work especially well for Rainbow Dash.”

Looking the cloth over, the ringmaster shook his head.

“What?” Rarity asked. “Why not?”

“It's not really our style,” the ringmaster replied. “It's our branding. These are the colours we use, these are the designs we use.”

Rarity's eye twitched. “Must I?”

The other pony shrugged.

“Well, then, I'll make sure to pour all my creative energies into the cut, the merger of different pieces of fabric – everything else about the costume!”

“I don't know...” Spike muttered, leaning back against his seat. “This just seems kind of like a waste of time.”

He shook his head. “I mean… the amount of effort that's going into this, we could totally do a new show for ourselves.”

"Aw, don't be such a Morose Marecy, Spike! When're you gonna get another chance to be in a circus?" Pinkie declared, munching on some of the popcorn Spike had in his basket as they watched Twilight try to coax Fluttershy out onto the stage to practice. "Just think of all the ponies we're gonna cheer up with this show! They'll be hotdogs, popcorn, cotton candy, and you get dibs on any leftover food!" She giggled, biting down on a ball of cotton candy.

Spike rolled his eyes, munching on some of the popcorn himself. "Well, yeah, it's not the worst thing in the world. It's just... I dunno, this doesn't seem like any kind of circus I've ever seen." Spike said as he spotted a few other clowns practicing, balancing on bouncy balls and playing rather large sets of bagpipes.

Pinkie chortled. "That's 'cause you haven't seen any circuses, silly! Just you wait, this is gonna be the best show ever!"

"Is this all? Ah don't mean to brag, but, this ain't exactly taxing work." Applejack shouted to Twilight up in the bleachers as she hoisted a large set of barbells over her head. "And it don't really feel right trickin' the audience like this either..."

"Well, that's what the ringmaster said the old strongmare used for practice. Something about it being closer to the actual prop." Twilight shouted back, making a few marks on a clipboard. "I think that's enough for tonight, you can set the barbells down anywhere.

"Ah hope they get the actual prop here soon, then. Ah don't wanna find out opening night it's heavier than ah thought." She let the barbells fall, and the squeaked and bounced across the grass, rolling to a stop several meters away.

"Nonononononono!" Rainbow Dash yelled, backing away from Rarity. "You said you were gonna redesign those costumes, I'm not wearing that thing!" Rarity gave an exasperated sigh, using her magic to try and shove Rainbow Dash into her new costume.

"Rainbow Dash, you have to- ungh- realize that I am no happier with these circumstances than you are! You're lucky the ringmaster at least let me change some of the colors, that red would have clashed horribly with your coat!"

Rainbow had backed herself into the wall of the tent, and before she could react, she was swept up in Rarity's magic and slid into her costume. It wrapped snuggly around her, covering most of her body while leaving her legs exposed much like a swimsuit. The design was a bright Wonderbolts blue, with a few thick dark blue bands and several thin rainbow lines forming a flashy plaid pattern. "Everypony else is in their costumes, the ringmaster wants to make sure they all look right. Now hurry up and get over to the others."

“Okay, Harry...” Fluttershy said, softly. “If you'd please keep your mouth open for a bit...”

The bear opened his mouth.

“That's good,” the butterscotch-coloured pegasus said.

She gently leaned forwards, putting her head towards his…

Then there was a loud PARP sound.

Fluttershy jumped, nearly hitting her head on Harry's teeth.

“Oops!” Pinkie said, cycling past on a unicycle. “Sorry, Fluttershy, these aren't as easy as they look! And they don't look easy!”

Harry made a small noise.

“Yes, you can close your mouth now,” Fluttershy told her bear friend.

“Darlings!” Rarity called to them. “We're doing the costume display!”

“I'd better go over there,” Fluttershy said apologetically.

The bear nodded, understanding fully.

“Okay, so...” Spike began, looking down at the price sheet. “So it's… three bits… and two bits for concessions, whatever that means… and then I have to sell drinks and stuff as well, which are… also called concessions?”

He stared, then threw up his arms. “Superheroes are easier to follow.”

Movement caught his eye, and he looked over – then snorted at the sight of all five ponies in their costumes.

He vaguely noticed Rarity had one as well, but hers didn't look so funny to him.

"Yeah, yeah, yuk it up, ya little matchstick" Dash grumbled. Applejack tugged at the rather bulky toga strapped over one of her shoulders, it bearing the same plaid pattern the others did, albeit in a more subdued orange and green.

"Oh my goodness, these are absolutely marvelous!" The ringmaster rushed over from outside, Twilight trotting after him. He admired each pony's outfits, from Fluttershy's bright vest and pants to Rarity's almost ballerina style dress, complete with tutu. None of the pony's looked particularly pleased with the extravagant nature of their costumes, but they did their best to look cheerful for the ringmaster. All except for Pinkie, who could hardly contain her excitement as she was still admiring her own outlandish, ruffled clown suit. "I really can't thank you enough for this, you've been far too kind!" The ringmaster said to Rarity.

"No, no, you really don't need to thank me..." Rarity responded, giving a forced grin as she looked down at her brightly striped leotard.

"Well, all the acts are in order, the costumes are good, and our little sweet seller is..." Twilight looked up from her clipboard. "Spike, why aren't you in your costume?"

Spike stopped his chuckling. "Wh-what? Why would I need a costume? I'm just selling popcorn!"

"Everypony's supposed to look their part, Spike. Rarity, you have it ready, right?" The unicorn nodded, presenting a simple jumpsuit the same red plaid as much of the circus's paraphernalia. Before Spike could react, he was shoved into the suit, which hugged him warmly and (much to his extreme embarrassment) gave him a wider rump than he would have liked, his tail wrapped up in the same fluffy material.

"Oh, I think this is going to be our best show ever! I hope you're all ready for opening night tomorrow! It's sure to be a real blowout!" The ringmaster declared.

As the latest group filed into the Big Top, Spike noted down the number and added the bits to the pile.

“This is going better than I'd thought,” he admitted, shifting slightly in his plaid jumpsuit. “Though I'm getting kind of tired of how many ponies are telling me I look cute.”

He looked around for the next roll of tickets, and couldn't find one.

“...wait a moment,” the dragon began, checking the numbers again. “Are we… sold out?”

“Spike!” a familiar voice hissed.

“What is it, Twilight?” Spike said, turning to look at his kinda-sister. “Is something wrong?”

“Have you seen the ringmaster?” Twilight asked. “I can't find him!”

“No, I've… you can't?” Spike repeated. “But… that means… wait, the show's starting in five minutes. Right?”

“Three minutes thirty-two seconds!” Twilight agreed. “We've got a big problem!”

She tossed her head, indicating he should follow. “Come on, we need to work out what to do!”

Spike waited long enough to put up the SOLD OUT sign across the ticket office, then hurried after Twilight.

“What do we do?” Twilight asked, looking between her friends. “The show should have started by now...”

“Well, sugar,” Applejack drawled. “Seems t' me that we've got a problem, an' we've got a solution right here along with it.”

Twilight gave her a confused look.

“I think I see what Applejack's getting at,” Rarity mused. “You've been doing so much of the organizing work you probably know the schedule better than the original ringmaster. So you can take over easily.”

Twilight's eyes widened, then she began to actually think about it.

“I… could,” she said, a little reluctantly. “Do you really think I should?”

“What, that or all this work's for nothing?” Dash asked, shrugging – wings moving slightly under the jumpsuit. “I say go for it!”

“Right,” Twilight decided.

Rarity levitated over a copy of the ringmaster's outfit, and Twilight slipped it on – both waistcoat and tam o'shanter, though done with purple instead of red.

“So,” she said, pulling a clipboard out from where she'd used it to set up the schedule. “First act is… Trixie's one. Trixie, can you-”

“Not without an assistant!” Trixie said quickly. “Trixie's only volunteer is Pinkie Pie-”

“I volunteer!” Pinkie reiterated.

“-but sawing Pinkie Pie in half is, Trixie concludes, unimpressive,” Trixie summed up.

“If Pinkie doesn't work, then who are you going to use?” Spike asked.

Everyone looked at him.

“Oh, no,” he denied, raising his arms. “No, no...”

“Spiiike...” Twilight began. “It's not that bad. It's just that everyone else has a job already.”

“But-” Spike began, then decided not to mention how Rarity was at a loose end.

Maybe Twilight was right. It certainly seemed like Trixie was… well, behaving, at least.

"Alright, I'll help," he conceded. Trixie spun about, her cape twirling as she did.

"You needn't worry, Spike. It shall be quite easy to be an assistant to such an adept magician!" She boasted. Spike bit his tongue as music suddenly began to play.

The audience hushed as the spotlight beams shone down onto the center stage. Twilight stepped out under the spotlights, walking towards center stage. Upon reaching the middle ring, Twilight took a deep breath before looking up to the crowd, grinning widely. "Greetings, ponyville! Today we've got quite a show lined up for you today! Daring feats of bravery! Amazing acts of wonder! A show that will leave you speechless! So, without further ado, please welcome to the ring, our lead magician, the great and powerful Trixie, and number one assistant, Spike!"

Trixie began marching out towards the middle ring, with Spike following close behind. Twilight stepped off to the side back to her friends as Trixie bowed. "Ladies and Gentlecolts, I offer you the pinnacle of magical trickery, of sorcery most stupendous, of tricks that will boggle and dazzle the mind!"

"Well, she certainly hasn't gotten over her boasting bit." Applejack muttered.

Trixie conjured up a box on stilts, turning to Spike. "If you would be so kind," She pulled apart the box, Spike attempting to hoist himself up into it. His hind legs wriggled as he tried to crawl into the box. A few ponies in the crowd chuckled, and Trixie grew impatient. She lifted Spike's tail into the air with her magic, stuffing his rear into the other half of the box as she pushed it shut. Spike's head popped out of one end of the box while his feet dangled out the other end.

Trixie presented a gleaming saw, placing it carefully in the middle of the box. With several quick motions, she pushed back and forth, appearing to cut Spike in two.

“Now, you see!” the showmare announced. “For I, the Dazzling and Magical Trixie, have cut this dragon in half!”

To demonstrate, she moved one of the boxes, showing that Spike's top half wasn't quite joined to his bottom half any more.

“Uh...” Spike said, twitching slightly. “Trixie? Can you put me back together please? I kind of need my feet...”

The crowd laughed, finding this all very funny, and Trixie basked in it for a moment. Then she clicked the boxes back together, removing the saw again.

Spike's feet slid back into the box, and a moment later Trixie pulled him out again.

“Ta-da!” she announced.

Spike smiled a little nervously, wondering how the trick – which had felt obvious to him – hadn't been noticed. But the applause was as loud as one could want, and then Trixie moved onto her next trick.

For the next few minutes, Trixie ran through most of the standard repertoire of magician's tricks. From a fire illusion (in which Spike was set on fire, though it affected neither him nor his jumpsuit), through a complicated coin trick which ended up with Trixie pulling a river of bits from behind the ear of her assistant, the crowd loved it all.

“I think this is workin' out pretty well,” Applejack whispered, looking through one of the holes from backstage. “She ain't half good at this when she ain't belittlin' other ponies.”

“Yes, I did get the impression that was the case,” Twilight agreed.

She checked the schedule. “Let's see… Pinkie's going to be going on next, once Trixie's show's wrapped up.”

“Well, it's not going to be long, darling,” Rarity said, warning Pinkie to get ready – not that she needed any prompting. “She's reached the rabbit trick.”

“And as a grand finale!” Trixie said, prancing around on stage and flourishing her cape. “The Stupendous and Surprising Trixie will pull no less than a real, live, rabbit out of her real, live hat!”

“Your hat's live?” Spike asked curiously.

“Something like that,” Trixie shrugged. “Now! If you will observe, I have nothing in my hat!”

She held it by the point and swung it around, then shook it, then turned it inside out just to be really clear.

“But!” she added. “Now, I will reach into my hat… and reveal...”

Down went her hoof.

What came out was not quite what she was expecting.

"A ra-" Trixie's voice died in her throat as, rather than being greeted by the long white ears of a rabbit, she was grasping some sort of long wooden pipe in her hoof. The pipe wobbled a bit, Trixie giving an experimental tug, which revealed the pipe was connected to something big. Something plaid. With a squeak of surprise, Trixie dropped her hat to the ground, where the pipe grew out, wrapped in plaid material by a thick red rope. Like a snake being charmed and with the steady hiss of air, the thing lifted itself out of the hat, only to be caught a moment later. The thing was stuck at the brim, but only for a moment. With another hiss of air, a large plaid bubble ballooned out of the hat, and two black stiff legs appeared shortly after, revealing the bubble to be a very large rear. The creature's tail twisted about as another hiss was heard, and arms appeared, pressing down against the brim of the hat. With a roll, and a rather loud 'parp!', the rear rolled back, and sitting before the audience was a large, round, plaid looking dragon. Pipes much like the one at the end of its tail stuck out of its back, the hat sitting atop its grinning head.

"Hello, ponyville!" The creature shouted. The audience, which had been frozen in amazement during the dragon's appearance, let out a big round of applause at the culmination of the trick.

"Twilight, this wasn't part of the act, was it?" Rarity hissed to Twilight. Twilight was frantically searching through her clipboard, eyes darting across the pages.

"I don't think so? Was this always part of Trixie's bit?" She looked up to see the dragon take a bow, whipping off Trixie's hat and placing it upon her head.

"That was a terrific show, Trixie, I must say!"

“A terrific show?” Trixie repeated, reaching up to her hat and adjusting it self-consciously. “But – that was not what I planned – I had the rabbit ready to – you interrupted my performance!”

“I did?” the dragon asked, smiling, and lifted himself up a bit before thumping back down on his rump again. The pressure wave from the impact rippled through his body, reaching the pipes on his back one at a time and producing a series of parp noises.

Each note was a little different, and they all seemed to hang faintly in the air for far longer than they should.

“After all,” the dragon went on, with a little hiss of air and the occasional note coming from the pipes on his back. “It's far more impressive to pull a handsome dragon such as myself from a hat rather than a mere rabbit, is it not?”

Trixie frowned, still not sure about this, but those piping notes seemed to echo back and forth inside her head – building up a steady resonance, getting louder and more influential, until she started to wonder why she was confused at all…

“What's going on?” Spike asked, and Trixie heard his voice as if it was from the other side of a loud concert hall – drowned out and unimportant. “Trixie?”

“Of course!” Trixie agreed, nodding – it made sense, after all. “Trixie's act is the most impressive!”

“It is,” the dragon confirmed. “And you did a wonderful job.”

Patting her on her back, making the plaid cape she was wearing ripple, the dragon produced a pair of bagpipes from – somewhere – and pressed them into her side. “Why don't you give us some music with the band for the rest of the show? That way you'll always be part of the performance!”

Trixie took the pipes and began to head off.

“Hey, wait-” Spike began, and then one of the dragon's spine-pipes gave him a sudden blast of music right in the face.

The notes made him feel a little dizzy, not quite sure what had been making him so angry a moment before… and for some reason, he felt slightly snug in his jumpsuit.

Maybe it had been a little bit small.

“Okay, I'm going to sort this out,” Twilight declared, trotting out onto the edge of the ring and indicating to the dragon that he should come over to the side to talk to her.

As the dragon came padding over, every step a bounce that made his body ripple oddly, Twilight thought about the question she was going to ask. The important one was-

“What's going on?” she began, selecting it as the simplest to state.

The dragon gave a little laugh, seeming to puff up a bit as he did before deflating back down again. "A show, silly filly! I would've thought you'd know that, seeing how you're the ringmaster!" He poked at her waistcoat, making Twilight stumble back a bit from the force. She shook her head. The answer the dragon gave didn't feel satisfactory, but she couldn't put her hoof on why. Looking back up to him, her eyes scanned his whole form.

"What... er... who are you, then?" She gave a quizzical look.

The dragon stood taller, placing his claws on his hips as he puffed his chest up proudly.

"Why, I'm Bagpiperix! And I think it's rather obvious what I am." He winked, bouncing in place excitedly. Looking over his shoulder, Bagpiperix noticed a few members of the audience talking amongst each other, a mixture of confusion and amusement at the spectacle. "Oh dear, but we're wasting time, aren't we? You don't want to keep these ponies waiting, they've come for a show! And I've heard you're quite good at keeping things running on time."

Twilight looked out at the audience, feeling more disappointed than she would have thought upon noticing some of them weren't paying attention to the show anymore. She looked back to her friends, who were trying to listen in on the conversation. "I, uh, suppose you're right." She said quietly. Bagpiperix nodded knowingly, patting Twilight's rump and pushing her back towards the spotlight. Twilight looked up at the bright light, still feeling a little dizzy. "Ah, sorry about the delay, folks, but don't you worry! The show's still going on!" Her confidence grew as she watched the audience all admiring her, making her voice louder and her grin wider. "Hold onto your sides and be careful not to fall off the stands, we've got a special treat for you! Pinkie Pie and her band of clowns!" Twilight stepped out of the spotlight as Pinkie appeared, pulling a rather small cart behind her towards the middle of the tent.

Pinkie was trembling with excitement, which she held in check for just long enough to unhitch the wagon in the middle of the Big Top – then she began prancing around in her ruffled costume, frills moving back and forth as she did so.

After doing two complete circuits, she went back to the cart, and opened the side – to reveal another clown, then another, and then another after that.

At least nine clowns came piling out of the small cart, each one doing so faster and more clumsily until the audience was laughing just from their antics in getting out of the door.

Forming a line, they bowed – not in unison – and formed a pony pyramid, with Pinkie at the top and doing a hooves-out display pose before the whole thing tumbled back down.

Silly music – full of parp sounds and whistles – came from the band pit, with Trixie happily puffing away on her new bagpipes to lead the band. Pinkie and her clowns did another bit to the tune of the music, throwing buckets of confetti around – then Bagpiperix came bouncing over and joined in the fun.

The big, plump, pipe-festooned, tartan-patterned dragon was so much larger than the clown ponies that he could do all sorts of things as part of the act with them. First he did a quick juggle, hefting up pony after pony to juggle three of them at a time with his forepaws and using his tail to switch ponies in or out.

Occasionally he dropped one, to a precisely-timed paaarp from the band, and the pony so dropped would land on their rump – only to be fine, or even to bounce a little, so the whole thing continued to be fun and funny.

The only one who felt something was wrong was Spike, who wasn't at all sure about this dragon who'd suddenly appeared from out of nowhere. But any attempt to make his concerns known fell on deaf ears, as the dragon began using his own back as a slide for the clown-dressed ponies.

In the midst of the feel of the performance – energetic, funny, full of life and cheerful music – it was a little hard to notice when first one and then another of the clowns reached Bagpiperix' tail.

The pipe forming the tip of his tail slipped inside the rear of their costume, and it puffed out a little – inflating the whole costume, but especially making the rear stand out and look prominently puffy.

“Uh...” Spike began. “That doesn't look – wait, something's wrong here...”

He tried to stop listening to the distracting music, but that was easier said than done, as the melody seemed to wriggle its way into his head and refused to leave. He shook his head, plugging his ears as he watched the clowns' antics continue. A few of the other clowns were tossing rings about as some attempted to leap through them. With their swollen rears, however, many become stuck in the hoops, wriggling about helplessly as the next clown would jump, only to have their muzzle squish into the previous clown's costume. The audience was roaring with laughter, cheering as they continued.

Bagpiperix laughed, balancing atop his tail as he leaned back, allowing Pinkie to bounce on top of his belly like a trampoline. Each bounce make another blast of music, accentuating the tune the band was playing. Spike watched, and he was sure that every bounce was seeming to make Pinkie's suit a bit more extravagant. Frills coated her now wide rump, and it wasn't long before she grabbed her hind hooves and began bouncing upon it instead.

Spike stood up, trying his best to block out the music as he hurried over to Bagpiperix. Reaching up to take a hold of one of his pipes, he tried to lift himself up. Bagpiperix glanced down, his smile growing as he spotted the small dragon. He scooped him up in one of his claws before dropping him onto his growing belly as well. Spike wobbled in place, the music louder now that he was on the source's own wobbly, swelling gut. He watched Pinkie bound about, her suit still growing a bit bigger. Wobbling in place, he tried to chase after her, doing his best to avoid tripping on the evershifting ground below him.

“Pinkie, you've got to snap out of it!” the dragon called, staggering as he tried to anticipate the movements of his patterned footing. “This isn't right!”

Bagpiperix laughed a booming, gleeful laugh – one that had most of the audience laughing along – and his tummy rippled in waves like the sea. Pinkie kept up her bouncing without a hitch, her outfit puffing up more and more, but Spike tripped on the second one and ended up rolling over twice before coming to something like a halt.

He had just enough time to see the next wave of belly coming before it bounced him into the air, high enough that he was in front of the big dragon's mouth as he let out a blast of music, and Spike's world went all fuzzy around the edges again – almost plaid, in fact.

Landing on a pile of half a dozen clowns – all stuck in their rings – Spike bounced off their padded rumps, then landed on his feet before falling back to a sitting position.

He watched a little shakily as Pinkie bounced down Bagpiperix' back, using the still-tootling pipes as landmarks, then she and the rest of her clowns landed next to the cart.

“All right, everypony!” Pinkie called, with a particularly loud blast of music coming with her words as she wiggled her padded tush in time with the beat. “Back in we go!”

This time there was a squeaky pile-up for the door of the cart. Ponies with thick, puffed-up costumes crinkled and squeaked as they tried to get in, with Pinkie only too happy to give them a rump-bump to knock stuck ponies into the cart, and when the last clown was in there were plaid stretches of outfit – well creased with the puffiness straining to get out – pressed up everywhere visible.

Giggling, Pinkie took the cart and pulled it off. She danced the whole way, and the crowd's applause was thunderous.

“That went well,” Twilight said, marking it down as a good result for Pinkie and Bagpiperix.

She was mildly surprised to discover she'd forgotten to put in a column for the plaid dragon, but shrugged it off as being due to overwork. Then she checked a little further down.

“All right, fillies and gentlecolts!” she announced, trotting out into the spotlight again. “For our next act, please welcome – the wonderful – the unbeatable – Rainbow Dash!”

The spotlights swung, pinpointing the costumed Dash right up at the top of the Big Top.