The Looney Student

by Teyeson Bee

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, Dean Cadance, Original Character, Comedy, Equestria Girls, Moondancer, Fleur de Lis
Length: 7220

Tired of being an outcast and loser at Crystal Prep, Moon Dancer creates and takes a serum that changes her appearance. But it's not the only thing that changes though. Based on The Nutty Professor.

Moon Dancer is the resident genius of Crystal Prep High School. She also happens to be working on a formula that can rearrange DNA and remove all flaws from a person's body; something she believes can change the world. However, she's awkward and geeky to most, and dreams of being more popular and winning the heart of her crush.

After being embarrassed to death by the school's queen bee, Moon Dancer takes a drastic leap and tests her formula on herself. When it appears to have worked, she adopts a new persona to go with her new look, and things seem to go her way. But how far is she willing to go, and how much is she willing to lose to get everything she's always wanted?

Based on the film The Nutty Professor, a bit from both the Jerry Lewis AND Eddie Murphy version.

Artwork by Chibicmps

Published 2019-01-27 06:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-08-12 05:23:37 UTC

Chapter 1

Crystal Prep Academy. A place of sophistication and higher learning. Well known for its reputation of having the highest GPAs in the state, Crystal Prep holds great pride in having some of the greatest minds in the district. Though the school was unchanging for the longest time, it had gone through quite a drastic change recently. The annual Friendship Games against rival school, Canterlot High, saw to that. The two schools put aside their differences and became friends, and Abacus Cinch, the strict and competitive principal, stepped down. Since then, the much kinder and caring dean, Cadence, took over, and the school had never been the same. Of course, along with the change in authority, there was another big change to the school. The formally highest mind, Twilight Sparkle, had transferred, and another took her place as the smartest student at Crystal Prep. Though some would see that as a double-edged sword.

One particular day, everything at Crystal Prep seemed completely normal. Students were going about their classes as usual, teachers prattled on with their lessons in physics or history, and everything, for the most part, was pretty quiet. That is, of course, until Professor Time Turner’s 11:00 Chemistry class. At first, it was quiet. Nothing but the sounds of bubbling beakers and whispered voices instructing each other on the next step of their assignment, and then...

BOOM!!!

The explosion echoed throughout the whole school and brought every lesson and activity to a grinding halt. Heads of students and teachers popped out of each doorway, frantically looking up and down the hallways for the source of the sound. Before any real panic could begin, Principal Cadence burst out of her office and walked as fast as she could past the muttering students, trying to keep as calm as possible. She wasn’t panicked though. She had a pretty good idea as to what, or more specifically who, was responsible. She soon came up to the door leading into the chemistry lab. The door was closed, and instead of the clear image of the classroom beyond the window, all that could be seen was a dense, black fog. From the inside came the sounds of coughing and shouting. Without wasting a single moment, Principal Cadence turned the knob and flew open the door.

Instantly, an onslaught of black smoke poured from the room, intermingled with the retreating students, still coughing and waving their hands in front of them to clear their vision. The last to leave was Professor Turner himself. While normally prim and proper with his pressed suit and combed hair, he now had patches of what looked like soot on his coat, and his hair had been slightly ruffled. Coughing as he leaned against the wall next to the door, he turned to meet Cadence’s gaze, a mix of frustration and exasperation on his face.

“What happened, Professor?” asked Cadence, though she felt like she already knew the answer. Professor Turner must’ve felt that too.

“Your first guess is correct,” he responded gruffly. Cadence sighed heavily and walked through the door just as the smoke began to clear. Looking towards the back of the room, her eyes fixed upon a feminine figure leaning over a still smoking beaker. The figure was wearing a thick, grey, turtleneck sweater over her Crystal Prep uniform, and had her reddish hair tied in a little ponytail on the top of her head, held together by a beaded scrunchie. Of course, it was hard to see the colors she wore at the moment, for her entire upper body was covered with black soot. Even the safety goggles she had on were coated, covering her eyes from view. She just stood there, frozen, over her blackened beaker, a glass dripper still pinched in between her fingers. Principal Cadence shook her head, her own feeling of exasperation sweeping over her.

“Ahem,” she called out. The figure unfroze immediately with a jolt and looked in the direction of Principal Cadence. Slowly, she raised her hands to her goggles and lifted them up, revealing a pair of thick-rimmed glasses held together with tape. The eyes of the smartest student at Crystal Prep, Moon Dancer, met Cadence’s, and an embarrassed smile spread across her still blackened face.

“Uh...greetings, Principal Cadence,” she chuckled nervously as she tried to dust off her sweater. “Some...weather we’re having today, huh? So...how are you?”

Principal Cadence did not return the smile.

Ten minutes later, in the Principal’s office, Moon Dancer was shifting uncomfortably in her seat, looking at Principal Cadence, waiting for the inevitable. After taking the time to calm the rest of the school down and send them back to their classes, the Principal had returned to her office, and was pacing back and forth behind her desk with a look of stern concentration on her face. Moon Dancer could tell that she was considering what to do next. It wasn’t the first time she’d seen that look, for this wasn’t the first time Moon Dancer had been sent to Cadence’s office. That’s what worried her so much. Once again, she had let her need to know overcome her common sense, and this time, she didn’t know if the Principal’s patience could stretch any further.

After what seemed like an eternity, Principal Cadence finally sat down, though she still looked stern. Moon Dancer glanced down at her feet and shifted again before looking back up. Her sweater still had black marks on it, and her face was smeared in some places with soot. Cadence looked at her for another minute, then took a deep, calming breath, and spoke.

“Moon Dancer,” she started. Her tone wasn’t angry, but bordering on annoyed and exasperated. “This is the third time this year that you’ve been sent to my office because of one of your science experiments. It’s the same thing every time!” Moon Dancer cleared her throat slightly.

“Technically, Principal Cadence, this is the first time I was called down for this chemical result. Last time, I had flooded the Chemistry Lab with some kind of foam-like substance. I don’t even know how I came to that result. Maybe a bad concoction of Chloric Acid and Potassium Ferricyanide, but you know, I think I may have just measured the wrong amount. I mean, in the scientific world, one wrong measurement could mean the difference between a harmless cure for boils or an atomic explosion! I think-”

“Moon Dancer!” Principal Cadence snapped, instantly making Moon Dancer shut her mouth. “That is not my point. This is the third time that you’ve been sent down her because of one of your personal experiments! It has to stop! It could lead to something dangerous!”

“Ma’am, I assure you,” Moon Dancer said, looking suddenly nervous, “I’m not really working on making an atomic explosion! That was just a little joke! I swear!”

Principal Cadence groaned and rubbed her temples. “I know you’re not trying to blow up the school, Miss Dancer. I’m just saying that untested chemical reactions can be both dangerous and expensive! The school’s equipment and the students are not here to be your personal, scientific guinea pigs! Need I remind you of what happened to the last student to whom you tested on?”

“That reminds me,” Moon Dancer piped up again, trying to sound a bit more cheerful, “I ran into Sunny Flare just yesterday.”

Cadence’s expression softened slightly at these words. “Really? How is she?”

“Well, she said that she’s fine and that the bandages should be off by next week.” Moon Dancer responded casually.

“Oh that’s-” Principal Cadence stopped and returned to her serious demeanour almost immediately, “Don’t try and change the subject, Miss Dancer! I am tired of the chemical incidents! The fact that you are the brightest student at Crystal Prep does not give you an excuse to play mad scientist!”

Moon Dancer looked down a bit apologetically, but tried to hide the blush she had from being called the brightest student. When she lifted her head and spoke again, her voice was confident. “I can’t help it, Principal Cadence! I’ve been working on a long-running project that could change the entire world as we know it. Every time I have a brainstorm about it, I just need to test it out as soon as possible!” Principal Cadence said nothing at first, but raised an eyebrow. Moon Dancer said nothing either as she waited for the principal’s response. Finally, Cadence took a deep, calming breath, and spoke again.

“I understand that we all get so excited about something that we look past everything else,” she said in a motherly tone, “but that still isn’t an excuse. Moon Dancer, you really are the top student here at Crystal Prep, and for that I am very proud. You also carry a determination to do your best. However, determination can turn into obsession if you overlook or ignore the well-beings of others, their possessions, or, in some cases, yourself. I want you and your project to be successful, but you mustn’t let your determination become obsession again, understand?”

Moon Dancer quickly nodded understandingly.

“Now,” Cadence continued as she opened her desk and pulled out a folder labeled Dancer, Moon, “I’m going to give you one more warning, and I’d be grateful for it if I were you.” She took out a pencil and wrote something Moon Dancer couldn’t see onto the paperwork in the folder. “If Cinch were still here, you would’ve surely been suspended.” She then put the folder back in the desk and looked sternly again at Moon Dancer. “I mean it, Miss Dancer; no more personal experiments on school grounds. Save those for home, ok?”

“Yes, ma’am!” Moon Dancer said, placing a hand over her heart. “You won’t hear any more explosions from me! I’ll just…write down my brainstorms and do them at home. I promise!”

“Very well,” Cadence responded with a soft smile. Just then, the bell rang and the sounds of students in the halls could be heard from a distance. “You may go.”

Moon Dancer bid the principal farewell and hastily left the office. A strong sense of relief that she was not going to be suspended welled up inside of her as she turned a corner. The feeling was short-lived however, and was quickly replaced by the experiment. Her failed concoction buzzed around in her head like a nest of angry hornets. She had been working on her formula for months now. Months of studying, planning, and testing, going through one crazy result after another. She was so certain that she had cracked it this time, only to wind up at another block. If she could just figure it out, her formula would change everything. It would even beat anything that former student Twilight Sparkle had ever come up with. If she could only get the right mixture.

“Hey, Moonie!”

Moon Dancer’s train of thought was interrupted by a familiar voice. She turned around to see the source walking down the hall toward her, to which she smiled and waved.

“Hi, Sketch,” she greeted back.

Sketch Pad was Crystal Prep’s resident scruffy-haired, geeky, but good-hearted, artist. He also happened to be Moon Dancer’s oldest and dearest friend. They had known each other since they could talk, and were still as close as peanut butter and jelly. Moon Dancer lingered a bit to allow Sketch to catch up. When he did, the first thing Moon Dancer noticed was his thick, colorful sketchbook that stood out like crazy amidst his dull-colored schoolbooks. Similar to herself with experimenting, Sketch couldn’t help but doodle at least once in his classes, especially when he had an idea.

“So,” said Sketch with a coy smile, “I’m gonna take a wild guess and say that the explosion was your doing. Correct?”

A blush spread across Moon Dancer’s face as she smiled embarrassingly. “Yeah. Sorry about that.”

“For what?” Sketch replied smiling. Moon Dancer raised a curious eyebrow to him as the two continued down the hallway. “Your explosion got me out of doing a speech I wasn’t prepared for. You just earned me another night! Thanks, Moonie!” Moon Dancer just shook her head and chuckled.

“Maybe you’d be more prepared if you weren’t so busy drawing when you’re supposed to be working,” she said.

“Um, hello?” Sketch retorted, putting a hand up to his ear like he was holding a phone. “Mr. Kettle? Mr. Pot called. He says you’re black!” Moon Dancer laughed and nudged Sketch playfully. The two stopped when they reached Sketch’s locker, and he opened it before saying, “So, what were you working on anyway?”

Moon Dancer looked up and down the hall to see if anyone was coming before responding in a hushed tone, “My secret project. The one I’ve been working on since summer!”

“Ah,” Sketch nodded, transferring some of his books from the bag to the locker, of course leaving the sketchbook right where it was. “Another dead end, eh?”

“Unfortunately,” Moon Dancer responded with a sigh. “I was so close, and yet once again, the answer has slipped from my grasp. Every single attempt just leads to another failed concoction.”

“Don’t beat yourself up about it, Moonie,” Sketch said as he closed his locker with a CLANG! “At least this time the end result wasn’t the worst that has happened. Remember when you burned a hole right through the lab table?”

Moon Dancer shuttered slightly. “Don’t remind me. I thought Principal Cadence was going to start releasing steam from her ears.”

“Any more steam, and she would’ve started whistling that her tea was ready,” Sketch added with a smile. Moon Dancer chuckled a bit, but the smile was short-lived as thoughts of her failures hit her again and she hung her head slightly. She then felt a comforting hand on her shoulder, and looked back up at Sketch, who was wearing a warm smile.

“You’re a smart girl, Moonie,” he said softly. “The smartest girl I know! If there’s anyone who can come up with the solution, it’s you! Don’t let a few hiccups stop you from trying Just give it some time. After all; a work of art can’t become a masterpiece without some rough sketches first.” There he went again. Maybe it was just from how long they had known each other, but Sketch always knew the right words for cheering Moon Dancer up. Slowly, her mouth spread into a smile.

“Thanks, Sketch,” she said. “I feel a little bit better now.”

“Glad to hear it,” Sketch responded. “I’m just sad you won’t be able to get me out of any more of my classes in the future.”

“Nope,” Moon Dancer giggled. “You’ll just have to learn to study!”

“Curses! My one weakness!”

The two laughed just as the bell rang again, signalling the beginning of the next period.

“We better get to lunch,” Sketch said, hiking up his bag and turning toward the cafeteria.

“You go on,” Moon Dancer responded, turning the other way. “I have to get some stuff from my locker.”

Sketch waved and hurried down the hall in the opposite direction. Moon Dancer started toward her locker, feeling more lighthearted than before. She was almost halfway there when she felt two pairs of hands suddenly clasp tightly onto her shoulders and pull her sideways. Before she could even know what was happening, she found herself dragged into the bathroom and her back slammed against the wall. Facing her were fellow classmates, Uppercrust and Suri Polomare, both with scowls plastered over their faces. And there, standing behind them, was Fleur de Lis, the prettiest and most popular girl in school. She, unfortunately for Moon Dancer, did not look happy.

“Uh…” Moon Dancer smiled awkwardly as she tried to find the right words, “Hello, Fleur. Nice weather today, isn’t it? Though I think it might rain later today judging by the direction the wind is blowing and-” she caught sight of Fleur slowly advancing with a scowl, “-then again, I’m not a meteorologist, so what would I-”

“Shut it!” Fleur snapped. Moon Dancer instantly clamped her mouth together. “Word has it that you are the one who caused that explosion. Is that true?”

“Um...yes?” Moon Dancer replied with a weak chuckle. Fleur did not smile back.

“Do you know what I was doing at that time?” Fleur asked with a quiet anger. Moon Dancer shook her head so jerkily, that it made her momentarily dizzy. “I was in the middle of making myself look beautiful. I mean,” she brushed her hair back, “even more than I already am, by trimming up my eyebrows a bit. Then, your explosion made my hand slip.” Her eyes narrowed as she leaned toward Moon Dancer so closely, that she was an inch from her face. “Do you know what happened then?”

“I...can’t say that I do,” Moon Dancer responded shakily, trying her best to sound unfazed, but failing miserably.

“This!” Fleur spat, and raised a finger to her left eyebrow. At first, Moon Dancer didn’t know what she was supposed to be looking at, but after squinting a little, she did notice something. Fleur’s eyebrow as a bit shorter than the other one.

“Oh,” Moon Dancer nodded, seeing Fleur swell with anger. “Well, it’s not that noticeable, you know. Eyebrows actually can grow back rather rapidly, depending on the health of your skin cells. As long as you don’t draw any attention to it, you should be-”

She trailed off as she saw the look on Fleur’s face. “Not. That. Noticeable!?” she shrieked. “It’s atrocious! Because of your eggheaded stupidity, my eyebrow is a whole centimeter off! It ruins my perfect face!”

“Technically, that looks more like half a centimet-”

Fleur growled menacingly, making Moon Dancer shrink back against the wall, her courage failing her yet again.

“You cost me my eyebrow,” she hissed, “so it’s only fair that you repay in full. As they say,” she then reached into her purse and pulled out a small, electric eyebrow trimmer, “‘an eyebrow for an eyebrow!’”

Uppercrust and Suri smiled and moved to grab each other Moon Dancer’s arms as Fleur turned on the trimmer, which started to hum, and began to advance again, an unsettling smile spreading across her face. All the blood felt like it had drained out of Moon Dancer’s head as horrible comprehension dawned over her.

“N-n-now, Fleur,” she stammered nervously, her eyes widening with fear. “I-I’m sure we can think of a more p-peaceful understanding, right? M-maybe sitting down for some tea or something? You don’t like tea? It could be s-sparkling water if you want! I’m not picky!”

Fleur did not respond, but continued to move the trimmer closer toward Moon Dancer’s face. Moon Dancer tried to struggle, but Uppercrust and Suri’s grip on her was too strong. She never really was one for displaying upper body strength. She couldn’t even climb the rope in gym class. As if in slow motion, Fleur’s hand started to descend upon Moon Dancer’s forehead, the trimmer’s hum sounding much more threatening.

“Oh c’mon, Fleur!” Moon Dancer pleaded when the trimmer was so close to her eyebrow that she could feel the tip of it graze her. “Let’s be sensible about this!”

“Oh I am,” Fleur responded with a smug grin. “After all, you’ve got enough eyebrow for everyone! Don’t be greedy!”

Chapter 2

Moon Dancer walked toward the cafeteria entrance, getting hot with embarrassment as she felt every eye turn toward her. She tried to cover her face the best she could, but the fact that she was now one eyebrow short seemed to stick out like a sore thumb and could be seen from a mile away. When she entered the cafeteria, every person she passed let out a loud snigger, a snort of suppressed laughter, or, if she was lucky, just flat out started howling like a hyena. Finally realizing that she was fighting a lost battle, Moon Dancer sighed in defeat and just hung her head low as she entered the lunch line.

“Rough morning?” one of the lunch ladies asked gruffly when Moon Dancer reached the register.

“Don’t ask,” Moon Dancer mumbled above the murmurs and sniggering. When she finally left the line, she quickly looked around the room for Sketch. She found him within seconds at the far left table, sitting with her other childhood friends, Lemon Hearts, Twinkleshine, and Minuette, whom she had known since grade school. Hurrying as fast as she could past the gales of giggles, she skidded to a halt at the table and sat down next to him. Sketch, who was focusing on his macaroni and cheese looked up when he heard Moon Dancer’s tray hit the table.

“Well it’s about ti-” he trailed off when he caught sight of Moon Dancer’s face, “-aye yaye yaye! What happened to your eyebrow?!”

The other three looked up as well and gasped in unison at Moon Dancer’s asymmetrical features. Moon Dancer sighed, picked up her spoon, and scooped up some fruit before answering.

“Fleur. She seemed to think that it was only fair since I caused her to mess up her eyebrow.” She chewed and swallowed before adding, “Even if it was just half a centimeter.”

“You can’t go around lopsided like that for the rest of the day,” Minuette said sympathetically. She then opened her purse and pulled out a makeup bag. After rummaging through it for a second, she pulled out a small, black pencil mostly used for eyelining. She beckoned Moon Dancer to lean closer, but Moon Dancer looked hesitant.

“It’s the only option you’ve got,” Minuette responded to her reluctance. “Or we could just shave the other one off.”

Realizing this was better than nothing, and that anything was better than having no eyebrows at all, Moon Dancer leaned in as Minuette traced the pencil above her eye. Everyone watched intently as the girl worked. Finally, she leaned back to admire her handiwork, and handed Moon Dancer a compact mirror.

“Good as new!” she said as Moon Dancer raised the mirror to her face. At first, it didn’t look half bad, but upon further inspection, she saw that something was a bit off. She wasn’t the only one who saw it either. Having an eye for artistic symmetry, Sketch immediately spoke up.

“New?” he said, halfway between exasperation and amusement. “You made it too high. Now it looks like she is constantly puzzled.”

Minuette huffed with defiance. “Well excuse me for not having your talent of drawing, Mr. Artsy-Fartsy!” Sketch was about to make a retort, but Moon Dancer cut across him.

“It’s alright, Sketch,” she said as she handed the mirror back to Minuette. “It’ll do for now. At least something’s covering it up, and you always say I look like I’m constantly thinking anyways.” She looked at Minuette and smiled. “Thanks, Minnie!”

Minuette returned the smile proudly and went back to her lunch.

“So,” Twinkleshine piped up after another minute of silence, “you said Fleur did that to you?”

Moon Dancer nodded. “She said my failed experiment today caused her to cut part of her eyebrow off, so she happily returned the favor.” The three girls looked at her, confused.

“She was working on her secret project,” Sketch answered to them. The girls all said, “Ah,” and nodded understandingly. More silence spread over the five friends as they returned to their food. The echoes of the rest of the students surrounded them while they ate quietly. Once and a while, Minuette, Twinkleshine, and Lemon Hearts looked up at one another, almost imploring one another to say something. After a minute, however, it was Lemon Hearts who broke the silence.

“Speaking of which,” she said, moving in a bit closer, “are you ever going to tell us what you’re secret project is?” Moon Dancer’s raised spoon froze an inch from her mouth as she looked at her friends now leaning inward expectantly.

“Yeah!” Minuette added, nodding vigorously. “I mean, you’ve been keeping it hidden for, like, ever! It’s only fair that you at least confide in your closest friends!” When Moon Dancer looked hesitant, Minuette continued, “C’mon, Moonie! We can keep a secret!”

Twinkleshine snorted with laughter and said, “Maybe the three of us can,” she pointed towards Lemon, Sketch, and herself, “but you? Remember in Sophomore year when you couldn’t even keep Sketch’s surprise party a secret?”

“Hey! I got excited!” Minuette retorted, a deep blush spreading across her face. “I’ve gotten better since then!”

“Y’know,” Sketch chimed in, “shockingly, you guys aren’t really helping your case. Besides, if Moonie doesn’t wanna tell us yet, I think we should respect-”

Moon Dancer suddenly placed a hand on Sketch’s shoulder, which stopped him at once. The others looked at her with baited breath as she looked like she was about to say something. Sure enough, after a few seconds, she smiled and nodded. While she was at first hesitant to confide in more people, it was very clear that her friends were more than trustworthy. They wouldn’t laugh or call it a far-fetched idea.

“Alright,” she said. “I’ll tell you guys.”

The four friends’ smiles widened as Moon Dancer beckoned them all into a closer huddle. She looked around one last time to make sure they weren’t being overheard, and then spoke in a quiet tone.

“I’ve been working on a formula that, when consumed, rearranges a person’s DNA and molecules to take out any imperfections of the body.”

The others’ reactions were just as Moon Dancer had expected them to be. All four pairs of eyes widened greatly, and Minuette’s jaw dropped. Even Sketch, who had always respected Moon Dancer’s wish to keep her project a secret, looked amazed. It was too clear that on the inside, he was just as curious about it as the others. It was several seconds before one of them spoke.

“What do you mean ‘imperfections’ of the body?” Twinkleshine asked.

“I mean physical things,” Moon Dancer answered. “Think of it this way; a morbidly obese person, whose dieting had never worked, takes the formula, and all that fat is taken away! An easy an effective way to lose weight! Or...maybe a girl whose been fighting a horrible case of acne. One swig of my formula, and BOOM!” Moon Dancer snapped her fingers dramatically. “Perfectly smooth skin! Never again would time and money be wasted on remedies that only partially work, or don’t even work at all!”

Sketch whistled astonishingly while the three girls all whispered, “Wow,” in unison. Moon Dancer smiled and blushed a bit with pride at her invested audience.

“And that’s just the tip of the iceberg, metaphorically speaking,” she continued excitedly. For someone who was keen on keeping her project a secret, she was almost bursting with giddiness at telling someone. “Overbite, lazy eyes, scars, you name it! They can all be fixed with just a little molecular reconstruction supplied by my formula, and the best part? No horrible side effects!”

“Except for the fact that every weight loss company and cosmopolitan will be after your head for putting them out of business,” Sketch sniggered.

“Joke if you will,” Moon Dancer said with a wave of her hand, “but this serum is going to change the world of scientific discoveries as we know it! It might even be written down in history books for future generations!” She paused for a moment to eat some more lunch before adding, “If only I could get the right combination!” Moon Dancer sighed and looked around the cafeteria, as if the solution was going to be found amongst the other students.

“It does sound really impressive,” Lemon Hearts said, going back to her own lunch. “It sounds like something you would wind in a science fiction novel.”

“Ish ‘ouns ermazin!” Minuette nodded through a mouthful of salad, unintentionally spitting some on Twinkleshine. “Oophs!” She quickly swallowed and added, “Sorry, Twinkle.”

“I wonder if it would be able to improve on eyesight,” Twinkleshine thought allowed as she wiped the lettuce off her sweater. “Or maybe even hearing.”

“Is that a physical imperfection?” Lemon Hearts asked.

“It’s not like it’s a disease,” Twinkleshine responded. “Maybe it counts.”

“Not sure,” Sketch shrugged. “I’m not an Otolar...whatsamacallit.”

“An Oto-what?” Minuette chimed in.

“An ear doctor. It’s called, like, an Otto-larson-gycologist, or something like that.”

“Moonie, what’s an ear doctor called?” Lemon Hearts said, turning towards Moon Dancer. “Moonie? Moonie?”

But Moon Dancer wasn’t listening. She was distracted by the arrival of an Adonis-like figure that she knew oh so well, but only in her dreams. Blueblood; by far the most popular and gorgeous boy in school. A dreamy expression spread across Moon Dancer’s face as he passed her table, surrounded by the usual group of female admirers. Oh how she wished she was a part of that group; to admire Blueblood’s smooth, golden hair that shone like the sun, or his radiant smile with perfectly white teeth up close. Alas, she could only admire him from afar. Moon Dancer placed her chin in her hand as she watched him and his fanclub walk to the other side of the cafeteria. Even after they had sat down, her eyes were still glued to him.

“Oy! Moonie!” said a far away voice that sounded like Sketch Pad. Reluctantly, she turned towards him.

“Hmm?” she said, not altogether there.

“If you could stop drooling for a second, you might see that your elbow is in your macaroni.”

Snapping back to attention, Moon Dancer looked down to see that Sketch was right. Blushing slightly, she grabbed a napkin and hastily wiped the cheese off her elbow.

“So,” Twinkleshine said as she glanced in the direction where Moon Dancer was staring before with a smirk stretching across her mouth, “having more fantasies about your prince charming?” Minuette and Lemon Hearts giggled teasingly. Moon Dancer sat bolt upright and blushed even harder. Sketch, however, scoffed.

“Women,” he muttered. This went unnoticed by the others, who had been switched to, what Sketch called, “Dreamy Boys Mode.”

“Have you tried talking to him lately?” Lemon Hearts asked. “I mean, I know the last time didn’t go so well, but...”

Moon Dancer shook her head rapidly, now red as a beet. “That’s an understatement! The last time I tried to say hi to him, I just ended up going into a long explanation about the history of the phrase, ‘Good morning.’” She put her face in her hands, not wanting to remember the confused look he gave her that day. “I have to work out a better formula for approaching him before I can even think of attempting it again.”

Minuette rolled her eyes. “Typical Moonie. Love is not about formulas or equations! Sometimes, you just have to wing it! If you want him to like you, you just have to go up to him, look him in the eyes, and-”

But whatever the next step was would be left unknown, for at that moment, a fit of laughter from some very familiar voices came up from behind them. Minuette, Lemon Hearts, and Twinkleshine, who were already facing that way, groaned as Moon Dancer and Sketch Pad turned, already guessing who was there. Sure enough, there were Fleur de Lis, Suri Polomare, and Uppercrust, laughing smugly at the five friends.

“Can we help you?” Lemon asked begrudgingly.

“Just enjoying a good joke!” Fleur responded, looking at Moon Dancer. “I mean, that was meant to be a joke right? About Blueblood actually falling for Looney Moonie?”

Moon Dancer’s blush deepened even more as Sketch whipped around and spat, “Don’t call her that, Fleur!”

“Ooh!” Uppercrust giggled. “It seems we struck a nerve!”

“So adorable, m’kay?” Suri added jokingly.

“If you really think that Blueblood would give a geek like you the time of day,” Fleur continued, rounding on Moon Dancer again and ignoring Sketch completely, “then you really are looney!” The three girls laughed again as Moon Dancer looked down at the ground. She could feel her head growing hot with embarrassment.

“I’m sorry,” Sketch snapped back in a sarcastic impression of a tour guide, “You appear to be lost. The Snob group has already moved on! Please be sure to take some brochures on how not to be stuck-up tripes on the way out. Thank you.”

Minuette, Twinkleshine, and Lemon Hearts laughed this time. Fleur scoffed and moved on toward her own table with her lackeys in tow, but not before saying to Moon Dancer, “Nice eyebrow by the way, Looney.”

As soon as they three had left, Sketch turned back to Moon Dancer, who was still red and looking crestfallen, and his expression softened.

“Don’t let her get to you, Moonie,” he said gently as he patted her shoulder. “Your eyebrow will grow back in no time.”

But it wasn’t Moon Dancer’s eyebrow that was bothering her. As much as she hated to admit it, Fleur had a point. Blueblood had never before given her so much as a passing glance. Back when Twilight was still around, no one really noticed Moon Dancer. It’s not like she was picked on like Twilight was, but it was like everyone was oblivious to her. After Twilight left, Moon Dancer hoped to stand out and be noticed a bit more, but all she did was cement herself as the new egghead of the school who was part mad scientist, part dorky recluse. That’s why she was so desperate to finish her project. If the formula was a success, it would show everyone, including Blueblood, that she could be someone to be desired.

The rest of the day went by without any more failed experiments. Thankfully, working drove the worries from lunch out of Moon Dancer’s mind. Plus another brainstorm on her formula, which she quickly wrote down in her notebook and made a mental note to put it into effect as soon as she got home. It seemed that any social problems were buried beneath the math and english problems. That is, until the end of the day announcements during final period.

“Attention, students,” Principal Cadence’s voice proclaimed over the intercom, “This is a reminder that the Homecoming Dance is in just a few weeks. Nominations for the Homecoming king and queen will begin Monday, and run until the end of the week, so keep in mind who you would like to nominate. All recommendations must be submitted at the main office. Thank you, and have a great weekend.”

Homecoming! How could she forget? It had been Moon Dancer’s dream to share a dance with Blueblood, who would certainly win Homecoming king. Of course, hoping to win queen was a fool’s wish, due to the fact that Fleur had a 99.9% chance of getting that honor. However, to imagine being the 0.01% that actually did it, to actually dance with Blueblood, would be a dream come true for Moon Dancer. She would sometimes imagine herself in the Cinderella-esque dress, and Blueblood in a shining, white tuxedo. He would take her in his arms and spin her gracefully around the floor. They would both look lovingly into each others’ eyes, and then-

“Earth to Moonie!”

The dream was gone. Moon Dancer was on the sidewalk, standing by the curb with her four friends, on the route home. She looked to her left at Lemon Hearts, who had called her, and answered her with a half-focused, “Huh?”

“We were just asking if you were going to go to Homecoming?” Lemon asked. “The rest of us are going as a group, you know, since we don’t have dates-”

“Excuse me!” Minuette interrupted, sounding insulted. “How do you know I hadn’t secured a date for the dance?”

“Did you,” Sketch asked bluntly.

“Well, no,” Minuette responded with a slight blush, “but I might have!”

“Case in point,” Lemon continued, turning back to Moon Dancer, “You wanna come with us?”

Moon Dancer didn’t answer at first. She had expected her friends wanting to go as a group, but her dream was battling for dominance with her desire to make her friends happy. She could feel their eyes boring into her as she stayed silent, and felt her face heating up with embarrassment.

“Well…” she said slowly, hoping to stall for time. “I was th-thinking about possibly, maybe-”

“Let me guess,” Twinkleshine interrupted with a coy look at Moon Dancer, “Blueblood?”

Was it that obvious, Moon Dancer thought, or did her friends just know her too well? Feeling her face growing hotter still, she nodded slightly. The Minuette, Twinkleshine, and Lemon Hearts giggled, but Sketch just rolled his eyes amusedly.

“Good Lord, Moonie,” he said. “You’re so obsessed with Blueblood, I’ll have to start doing ‘Senpai jokes’. What do you even see in him? He’s...he’s...uh...”

“Dreamy?” Minuette stated.

“Hunky?” Lemon Hearts added.

“Gorgeous?” Twinkleshine chimed in.

“I was actually gonna say ‘coming this way’,” Sketch answered, pointing down the street.

Moon Dancer jumped and looked up. Sure enough, there was Blueblood, walking down the street towards her. Moon Dancer instantly felt her face heat up even more, and her body got all uncomfortably itchy as it usually did when Blueblood was near. She started to worry that she would start hyperventilating. In a state of panic, Moon Dancer quickly jumped behind Sketch, who was easily the tallest of her friends, and crouched as low as she could, praying that Blueblood didn’t notice. Her temporary sanctuary was cut short, however, as Minuette’s arms grabbed her and dragged her back out into the open.

“Oh no you don’t!” she said determinately, taking hold of Moon Dancer’s arms and looking her straight in the eyes. “No more hiding! This is your chance, Moonie!”

“I-I-I-It is?” Moon Dancer stammered, not taking her eyes off Minuette.

“Today is the day!” Minuette continued. “You’re gonna talk to him at last!”

“I-I-I-I am?”

“Yes! And you’re gonna look him dead in the eyes, and say, ‘Hi Blueblood. Do your legs hurt? ‘Cause you’ve been running through my mind all morning.’ Simple as that!”

This did not reassure Moon Dancer that much. As she watched Blueblood walking closer, her heart started to speed up its pace, making it feel like it was going to burst right out of her chest. She glanced at Minuette, Twinkleshine, and Lemon Hearts, who all gave her a supportive nod. She then looked at Sketch, who shrugged slightly, as if to say, “Whatever floats your boat.” It was too late to ignore it any longer, for Blueblood was a foot from them. Throwing all caution into the wind, and feeling like she was ignoring all warning alarms in her head, Moon Dancer stepped into Blueblood’s path.

Blueblood stopped for a moment, and looked down at her, a curious expression upon his handsome face. Moon Dancer just stared awkwardly at him for a second. This was the closest she had ever been to him, and it was like the bright, baby blue eyes and sparkling teeth were melting away what speck of confidence she thought she had.

“Uh…I...um...eh…” she spluttered, trying to find her words, but failing miserably. Now she was starting to sweat, and Blueblood looked more scared.

Suddenly, Moon Dancer felt a slight kick from behind her given by Lemon Hearts, which immediately turned on her vocabulary switch.

“GREETINGS BLOOD BLUE HAVE YOU RECENTLY SUSTAINED ACHING LEG JOINTS BECAUSE YOU’VE BEEN TREKKING THROUGH MY CRANIUM ALL THE MORN!”

The heat from Moon Dancer’s face was enough to roast an egg she was so embarrassed. She didn’t even know where that came from. There was no smoothness, no coolness, not even any punctuation. Silence surrounded the small group, broken only by Sketch, who let out a soft falling whistle followed by an explosion sound effect. After a few more awkward seconds. Blueblood edged to the side, looking absolutely flabbergasted, and hurried off down the sidewalk. As soon as he was out of sight, Moon Dancer dropped her head into her hands and let out a mortified groan.

“‘All the morn’?” Sketch asked, respectfully trying not to chuckle.

“I KNOW!” Moon Dancer’s muffled voice screeched from behind her hands. “This happens every single time I try to talk to him! I say something ridiculous and make a complete fool of myself!” As she lowered her hands at last, Moon Dancer sighed and dropped down on a bus stop bench the group was passing at that time. The others stopped and sat beside her, looking sympathetic.

“I just don’t know what to do,” Moon Dancer continued as she looked at the ground. “How am I supposed to ask Blueblood to Homecoming if I can’t even talk to him without sounding ridiculous?”

“Moonie,” Minuette started in a much softer tone than her last pep talk, “You can do this. You just need more confidence. In fact, you already have a whole lot of confidence!”

Moon Dancer raised her eyes to her friends, all wearing supportive smiles.

“She’s right,” Lemon Hearts added. “I mean, you’re able to easily give a full, 30-minute speech about the doppler effect. That takes confidence.”

“You can stand in front of a watching crowd and proudly fill a chalkboard with equations without breaking a nervous sweat!” Twinkleshine said, touching Moon Dancer’s shoulder comfortingly.

“Yeah,” Moon Dancer mumbled, still looking uncertain, “but that’s all math and science, to which I pride myself on. Social agendas and human interaction? Not so much.”

“Well then,” Minuette said, pounding a fist into her hand, “we’ll just have to help you build up some social confidence. We can all give you some tips on how you can become more extroverted, and even build up some self-assurance!”

“You know,” Lemon Hearts said, a smile spreading across her face, “that’s not a bad idea. We just have to unlock that social butterfly inside of you, Moonie, and before you know it, you won’t just be asking Blueblood to the dance, but maybe, just maybe, he’ll be asking you!”

Moon Dancer looked at each of her friends’ reassuring faces, and slowly, a warm feeling was filling inside of her. A feeling of hope; a hope that she would no longer be seen as a reclusive geek, but, as Lemon Hearts said, a social butterfly. If her friends believed in her, she could try to believe in herself.

“Well,” she said, a small smile starting to spread on her own face, “I suppose, if you all want to try, I don’t have anything else to lose.”

“That’s the ticket!” Twinkleshine cheered, slapping Moon Dancer on the back. “We’ll start tomorrow. I’m sure we can all think of some great tips over night.”

“If this is what you want, Moonie,” Sketch smiled at his dearest friend, “then count me in!”

The reassuring words of her friends was filling Moon Dancer with more hope, almost to the point of bursting. She was actually excited. If this worked, it would be a great leap of improvement for Moon Dancer’s social performances, and might even secure her not only a hint of affection from Blueblood, but respect from Fleur and her groupies.

After all, she was a prodigy student, who could recite the Periodic Table backwards while writing the equation on string theory. Learning a few tips on how to be socially confident? How hard could it really be?