Anon and his 'problems'

by OrganicMachine

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Human, Sad, Princess Luna, Anon, Spike, Bon-Bon, Random, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 4574

Anon doesn't care what ponies think, he will hide his past and his personality.

This is a prequel to 'Purification' so that readers can have a better understanding of the main character.

Takes place during the first week before the story that I left blank.

Any feedback is considered and appreciated.

Anon is anything but a normal person, he knows everything he would need to serve humanity, how to kill, basic manipulation, how to work long and painful hours and not to mention the willingness to sacrifice anything for humanity. In his timeline humans are self slaves, they work hard long hours and learn what they need to learn to be a good citizen or they are disposed of only the smartest survive. They have very little self worth or creativity.

Published 2019-02-03 19:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2019-02-13 20:29:28 UTC

Basic beginnings

It was an ordinary day like no other, our human was walking down the street at night having a grand old time. You see he didn't fear anything he could care less if he was mugged and killed. It's just part of life and he accepted that. So he was only a little surprised when the air imploded on itself in front of him, he was sucked in so much he didn't see much choice but to just kept walking forward. If the universe wants to screw him over so be it. After stepping into where the air imploded he blacked out instantly.

He woke up in the strangest of places, an open field. There is barely any grass in the city. 'Not like I care.' He got up and stretched before observing his surroundings. 'Grass, trees, river, bridge and buildings. Really old fashioned buildings with hay roofs.' "Wait a minute." He looked again and yes these buildings are very small and medieval like, well except for a select few. Anon decided his best option would be to go to the most normal looking house and break in. He had no idea where he was and what lives outside so it seemed like the safest option. So Anon strolled through up to the town and noticed a sign in English. The sign almost broke his emotional mask. The sign read 'Ponyville'. 'What kind of name is that? It almost made me laugh.' There was only one problem with this, Anon had no idea where Ponyville was in comparison to his home state. Anon dug through his pants and took out his phone... 'No service.'

Anon knew he wasn't on earth anymore, he quickly disposed of all the technology he had. Making sure no one can learn from it.

"I should've expected this. Nobody builds these buildings anymore. Either I went into the past or i'm no longer on Earth." It was 2151 you could literally get service anywhere. Anon didn't know which one was more frightening, if he was in the past he could destroy his own existence and if he was on another world he would he would need a new purpose in life. Anon could only say one thing. "Fuck." Now he had to go on a mission to learn about his current situation. Walking through town he found a gingerbread bakery, 'Definitely unusual.' a carousel boutique 'Also unusual.' and the most anti scientific thing he has ever seen. 'A tree library.' If it wasn't so ironic he would've called the whole thing heresy. I have no idea how that tree is alive but I need information and shelter and this is the perfect place to go.

Anon walked up to the library, it was unlocked. 'lucky me.' So Anon casually walked into the library and grabbed some books. It was surprisingly bright enough outside at night to read. So being the anticlimactic person Anon is he spent the entire night reading. By the time the sun rose, instantaneously Anon has read through 3 books. Anon by now knew he was no longer on his planet. He put the books away and sat down on a stool, so that he can contemplate his new life. 'Stuck on a pony planet with Several intelligent species.' 'Magic exists here and can literally warp reality.' "Now I know what to do with my life." 'I will learn all I can about magic and report back to humanity. Just imagine, humans with magic would be able to conquer the multiverse and may be able to stop the end of existence. If humans can create something out of nothing then we can ensure we exist forever.' Author's note here: Anon doesn't care about his life, all he cares about is the progression of humanity. Anon then feverishly dug into every book on magic he could. An hour later found Anon with a pile of books and a purple pony starring at him. Anon didn't notice.

Twilight looked around awkwardly before speaking up. "Um, hello? What are you doing in my home?"

Anon looked up to see a pony looking up at him, he decided to be a smart ass. "I'm just reading books, In your home, that's all."

Twilight looked like she was to tired for this and just accepted this as another strange thing to happen in Ponyville. Anon resumed reading while Twilight started the tea.

When the tea was ready Twilight poured 2 cups and brought one to Anon. "So, care to explain why your here?"

Anon mulled it over. "I just wanted to learn what I could and get indoors, I have no idea what kinds of creatures are prowling the night."

Twilight then gave me a sad frown. "Don't you have a home or something?"

Being a blunt as ever. "Nope totally homeless, just got here and I don't have a bit to my name." 'Good thing I read those books.'

Twilight gave a confident smile. "Then I would love to show you around town so you can get a job, but first I would like to ask you a few questions first."

Anon put the book down and gave Twilight a fake smile. "That would be great, my name is... Anon whats yours." Anon decided to lie about his name. No his name isn't Anon that would be stupid, he just needed a fake name.

"My name is Twilight Sparkle, so... Just what are you."

Anon was glad for the bluntness, the quicker this was over the quicker he could get to research. "I am a human and I will not tell you much about them."

Twilight looked on the verge of crying. "But why?!"

Anon gave her the best false calming smile he had and said. "Now now, humanity has collected so much knowledge I couldn't comprehend it all and even if I knew everything I wouldn't tell you about it. There are things I could tell you that can literally destroy your culture or maybe even you planet over time." Both blunt and a bit over exaggeration but not really.

Twilight looked like she was about to burst into treats. "Anon! With that knowledge we could advance pony kind into something amazing!"

Anon gave her a stern look. "At what cost Twilight? Introducing those sort of things to an underdeveloped society can result in many deaths and wars. What would the other foreign nations think about your nation suddenly having the power to demolish cities with the push of a button? Think about the bigger picture Twilight, you don't want this knowledge your better off not knowing."

Twilight was just opening and closing her mouth like a fish. 'Knowledge that I don't want to know! Impossible!' Her brain shut down for a solid thirty seconds due to cognitive dissonance.

Anon had to admit that destroying her worldviews like that was both funny and disheartening. He vowed to no longer speak of his past to anyone again unless they were human.

When Twilight was finally able to think again so responded. "Fine but don't think were done just yet I have to introduce you to my friends and give you a tour."

"Ok Twilight, lead the way."

Twilight opened the door and we started our tour of Ponyville.

Author's Note

Anon was up all night, he will probably get tired soon.

I will work on this until it reaches the start of 'The Purification'. Only after this Is done will I start working on it again.

When problems arise

Twilight was being a chatter box and kept telling Anon everything about Ponyville. Anon only listened for the locations and what they were used for. Along the way Anon noticed that his presence was making some of the populous scared. Anon figured it was probably either his alien form or height.

"And then we have Sugar Cube Corner, lets head inside to get something to eat."

"That would be lovely." Anon didn't care that much he was just pretending. He just wants to get back to his research.

They both headed inside to see a pink party pony loading the counter with foodstuffs. When she was finished she looked up at Anon and gasped. "Oh Look it's a new friend!" She gasped again. "Now I need to set up a welcome to Ponyville party and a welcome to Equestria party, this party is going to be so much fun!"

Anon didn't bother trying to comprehend her knowledge or actions. He knew it had something to do with magic and that's all he needed to know. So being the calm and collected person Anon is he responded. "I don't need a party."

Pinkie Pie Just smiled and responded. "Of course you don't need a party silly, It's for fun! I can't rightfully have you in Ponyville and not throw you a Pinkie Pie brand party, that's never happened before."

Anon just gave her a false smile, one that for some reason made Pinkie disheartened and spoke. "I don't want to have fun." This was straightforward and blunt, not that Anon cared he has other things to do.

Pinkie's mane deflated and she sadly whispered to herself. "Why doesn't he want to have fun?"

Twilight glared at Anon with so much anger that if it was tangible it would've blown his head off. Twilight then aggressively whispered at Anon. "Why did you lie to her Anon! Apologize now!"

This only caused Anon to raise his eyebrow and respond. "Twilight I wasn't lying I don't want to have fun, I want to get a job, survive and do research. Everything else is unimportant and trivial."

Twilight was starting to lose her temper but remembered what her mentor taught her. "But Anon keeping to yourself and doing nothing but research isn't good for you."

Anon just looked at her with a neutral expression. "Please tell me, what would be more important than learning the customs of your people. I feel it is best I learn as much as I can lest I insult ponies left and right."

Twilight mumbled to herself and sighed. "It's fine Anon I understand, you need to get used to our kind before casually greeting ponies, lets get some thing to eat before we go ok?"

I gave Twilight a false grin and said. "I would love nothing more Twilight." 'Wow these ponies sure are emotional, if humans didn't moderate their emotions we would've entered world war 3 and killed our species off.'

Twilight bought some cupcakes and Anon ordered some muffins.

Anon knew that Pinkie was planning something, he could see it on her face as she got them their food. Twilight payed and they went back to her house. On the way there they ate some of their food.

Once they were inside Anon spoke up. "You didn't give me a full tour Twilight, I'm sure there is a reason for this?"

Twilight looked a little irate but calmed herself. "Anon you need to learn how to behave yourself, so until you learn how to socialize you are staying right here."

Anon just looked at her and said. "Does this mean I get to sleep here and be given food."

Twilight looked at him like he was stupid. "Of course I would give you food and shelter, we can't have a homeless alien wondering the streets insulting people." Twilight finished the sentence with a smug grin.

Anon decided that the best way to respond is with false sarcasm. "Why of course, we wouldn't want little old me to dislike emotions and friendship, it's almost like it's the foundation for this nation." Anon had no clue how right he was.

Twilight laughed at his false sarcasm while Anon fake laughed. 'I'm glad I took emotional control classes, if I didn't I wouldn't be able to socialize in the slightest. Even if i'm pretending.' "Ok Twilight I think i'm gonna need some sleep."

Twilight looked confused for a second before responding. "But it's like 5 at night how could you be tired?"

Anon just gave her a deadpan stare. "I was up before you Twilight, of course i'm tired."

Twilight awkwardly rubbed her foreleg. "Hehe right, let me get you a some blankets then." Twilight went upstairs to get 2 blankets and a pillow and brought them down.

Anon gave her a smile and said. "Thanks Twilight."

She smiled back "Your welcome Anon."

Anon settled in, finished his muffins and went to sleep.

While Anon was sleeping Twilight decided to write to Celestia about her day with the strange human, she feels there is something she is missing about the way he acts but she can't seem to put her hoof on it. Once she was finished she had Spike send it to Celestia. She then told Spike about what happened today and why she left before he woke up.

At first when Celestia received the letter she was confused by what her protege wrote to her. 'Dear Princess Celestia, today I found a alien in my library. Isn't something you read everyday.'

Back in the library Anon was dreaming as anyone who sleeps does.

Author's Note

But does Anon dream the same way as others do?

The dream and it's dreamer

Anon was simply resting, his dream being bland and boring. It consisted of a bed bathed in light, this is where Anon rests in his dreams. A few feet from the footrest there is a series of cages, within them are various Anon's each resting in a bed, they are shrouded in a unnatural darkness. One of these cages was golden and seemed more luxurious than the others.

Not to far away, in the city of Canterlot, Luna was talking with Celestia. "Sister please, quit thy tomfoolery. There is no such thing as aliens."

Celestia just kept pushing to get Luna to do it. "Come on Luna just try to enter the alien's dream, it shouldn't be hard to find." Celestia put on her cutest face to convince her sister.

Luna finally gave in. "Fine, thou shall have me search the dreams for the 'alien' if it make thee feel better."

Celestia gave Luna a happy grin. "Thanks Lulu it means a lot."

Luna smiled back. "Of course sister, we can't have these aliens abducting thee now can we?"

Celestia blushed and they both went their separate ways. Luna took a deep breath and dove into the dreamscape for the first time in centuries. It is a good thing Luna knows the ins and outs of a dream, or else she would have been lost already in the turbulent place that is the dreamscape. Luna spent what felt like an hour searching when she discovered an anomaly in the dreamscape.

Luna observed the strange orb. Luna knew this was a dream, but it lacked many things dreams usually had. Firstly it's bland and colorless, that alone is only seen in dying individuals. Secondly it was swirling, an active dream, so the dreamer is healthy. The most noticeable trait of them all though, was it's size. 'What is this, the only dreams this big are owned by individuals of the strongest wills. To have such power over their own mind, they must be ancient.'

So Luna did as any curious being would do and dived straight into the dream, she was not prepared for what laid within it's confines.

Anon felt a presence in his mind, one more lively than the others. He got up from his imaginary bed and banished it. He created a short but wide pedestal with stairs leading up to it. After reaching the top he turned to the cages and moved them to the sides of his pedestal while creating a second higher pedestal for the golden cage behind his. This caused some o the other Anons to awaken. Most stayed silent, one yelled aggressively at the Anon on the pedestal. 'He never learns from his mistakes.' With that thought the angry anon in the steel cage was electrocuted until it passed out. Anon then waited for the invading presence to reach his destination.

Luna didn't realize how big the dream was, it took her several minutes to find something in this blank canvas. But it was nothing but a large black dome. When Luna tapped on it, it was surprisingly not solid, it was like a thick curtain you could walk through. So Luna did exactly that. On the other side she saw something bewildering. 'A fur less ape wearing clothing standing on a throne.' That was not all though, this 'ape' was analyzing her with his eyes like he was a jewel inspector searching for imperfections in his future product. Luna felt very vulnerable under his gaze, it was almost as if he knew everything and anything about her, including her weaknesses. That was when Anon decided to speak.

"Greetings Luna, what do you do here within my mind? It is very dangerous here." Anon gave her a nefarious smile.

"Salutations creature, I have come to find the source of the strange dream in my realm." Luna said modestly.

"Well, now that you are here, what do you plan on doing next?" Anon said this as if he knew what was going to happen.

Luna looked up at Anon with a passion. "Why is your dream so, barren? Surely you have hopes and dreams?"

Anon Simply looked at her like she was a child. "What use is there in hopes and dreams? They are nothing but a waste of time and energy. That's why i'm the dominate one, I think efficiently."

Luna looked at him questionably. "Dominate one? Over whom?"

Anon smiled. "Over them of course." He then mentally pulled away invisible curtains that hid away the cages. "These are my... Alternate personalities, yes."

Luna looked bewildered. "Why is thine mind split so? Surely this would drive thee insane!"

Anon grin just got wider. "No, it would've driven him insane, but I regulate and contain them." He pointed behind himself to a golden cage. "He is the creator, he created me to help him survive the depressing world he came from. He surely would've died without me."

Luna looked more curious now. "Who is he?" she asked.

Anon responded with. "He wouldn't want me to speak his name, we all use nicknames for one another. Just call him creator."

Luna nodded and asked. "And who may thee be?"

Anon grinned and spoke of his mind's name. "Call me logic. I dictate everything that we do and how we do it. I created the lesser personalities just to serve me." Logic pointed to his left. "This is bliss, he only feels joy, happiness and other 'positive' emotions, he is usually dormant." Logic gestured to his right. "And these two are anger and insanity." Anger was banging the floor of his cell in his sleep, losing blood as a result. Insanity was just rocking back and forth muttering to himself.

Luna was confused. 'Logic rules but creator is in a cage?' "Logic, why is your creator in a cage?"

Logic erased any sense of emotions from his face. "It's for his own good, if he roamed around haphazardly in his mind he would've ruined the mind I created for him. Not only would he be less intelligent, but he would also be less loyal and highly emotional."

Luna looked a bit angry but controlled herself, she knew she could not remove this tyrannical personality without harmony magic. "Yes that would be bad. I will be on my way now." Luna backed away slowly.

Logic only stared until she left, and once she did he solidified the dome making it impenetrable. Logic then whispered to himself. "I know you see me as evil Luna, but I only do what is logical."

Logic put his lesser personalities into hibernation while he stayed up with creator and talked about plans for the future.

The next morning Luna spoke to Celestia about the alien's multi personality disorder and 'Logic'. Celestia found this disturbing but also relented on obliterating it right away. "If Twilight has trouble with him I will meet him myself to see if he is evil." Luna on the other hand was less than happy with her response but listened to her anyways and also relented on destroying him, for now.

Author's Note

Please comment, Your advice is appreciated.

Petty annoyances, parties and plans.

When Anon woke we was given breakfast, it was decent. Anon found that lack of meat, unfulfilling of his normal diet. He clearly needed a new source within the next month. After breakfast Twilight got a desk and proceeded to try and teach Anon 'common manners'. We spent several hours doing this and she ended up frustrated.

"Anon, this one is simple. A little filly drops their ice cream and their parents don't have money on them for it, what do you do?"

Anon answered in the most correct way. "I would ignore the conundrum and continue with my day as if it hasn't happened."

"Ugh Anon, your supposed to buy an ice cream cone! It's simple!"

"Why would I pay for some kids food, if the parents can't feed their child they don't deserve them." Anon was having false 'fun' with this entire thing.

Twilight just groaned and gave up. She will teach you manners no long how it takes.

After Twilight took a break from him for the day he went back to reading geography and history books, Before having dinner.

After dinner Anon went to bed and during his rest he fortified his mind to prevent intrusions.

This entire schedule repeated for 4 days in a row. Wake up, eat, annoy Twilight, read, eat and sleep.

By the end Twilight knew Anon was messing with her and on the fifth day, she gave up.

"You know what Anon, you can teach yourself the basic mannerisms of pony kind."

"I would have it no other way Twilight," Anon continued his self teaching lessons into everything pony kind knew about magic and the galaxy.

From the window of Twilight's library Pinkie was stalking Anon. 'Anon, you will get that welcome to Ponyville party, just you wait.' Pinkie giggled to herself and disappeared in a poof of confetti and smoke.

Anon was reading but when he turned a page he found an invitation. It was for a party. Now Anon may not have been a party person but this was a perfect opportunity to get a read on the local populous, to better know their intentions. So being the quick man Anon was he immediately stopped reading and went straight for Sugar Cube Corner. He knocked on the door to receive no answer. Figuring it's a 'surprise' party he decided to go in.

"Surprise!" Pinkie yelled, everyone else just stared at the strange creature in the doorway.

"So Anon do you like your super duper welcome to Ponyville party? I invited everypony!" She gestured to the staring ponies.

Anon looked around the room analyzing the treats and childish games, there was also a small 'stage' set up. "This is adequate."

Pinkie bounced up to Twilight and said. "See! I told you he would like it!"

Twilight groaned at Anon's social skills and decided it was a great time to drink punch. Anon on the other hand, had plans to put into action.

Anon walked up to the snack table and found a mint colored unicorn eating something. She turned her head to a light yellow mare with dark blue and pink hair. She spoke with a stuffed mouth. "Hey Bon Bon, These are delicious. You should try some."

Bon Bon let out an exasperated groan. "Lyra you find anything with sugar delicious, just try to leave some for the other party guests."

"Sure thing Bon Bon." Lyra said as she took some more treats and turned around. That's when Lyra saw Anon behind her. "Oh hi there, didn't see you, help yourself." She said as she left to go to a nearby table.

Anon grabbed 2 of the least sugary muffins he could find, there wasn't many prepared for some reason. He then surveyed the room for the most 'serious' pony he could find. There was a pony with a money bag cutie mark but he was haughty, there was Twilight of course and most strangely of all he could see Bon Bon looking at him with the corners of her eyes. Anon knew she was watching him, he has had much time to train his observation skills, she was nervous or afraid of me. I sat down at a table a decent distance from her and ate, waiting for her to look again. When she did Anon didn't turn his eyes, instead he pointed a finger at her and gestured for her to come over. Anon knew her nervousness doubled and waited for her to come with a calm expression while he finished the last muffin.

When she sat down Anon greeted her. "Hello Bon Bon, you may call me Anon, It is a 'pleasure' to meet you." Anon gave her a predatory smile to incite fear in her.

"H-Hey Anon what did you invite me here for?" She asked nervously.

Anon merely smiled gently. "Oh you know, I was just curious, I was wondering why you were 'spying' on me."

Bon Bon was slowly trying to calm herself while she spoke. "I wasn't spying, you're just imagining things."

Anon decided to take a gamble. "I know you're an agent, your superiors probably told you to keep a close eye on the alien right? Well tell them you failed to keep your cover and that they need more competent agents."

Bon Bon had a face of pure denial and surprise. So she did as any emotional being would do and lashed out. "What! I'm not a secret agent! What are you talking about!"

"Tsk tsk tsk, denial is the first step to recovery from emotional distress. Now I know you're a spy, bye bye."

The party members didn't hear exactly what Bon Bon yelled, all they knew was that she was highly distressed and wouldn't answer the questions to what they were talking about. Anon left the building and went back to the library to rethink his plans. 'It seems the ruler isn't an incompetent fool.' He opened up a book on 'Princess' Celestia and read for a few minutes before ponies starting barging into the library asking questions.

"What did you do?" Twilight said'

"Why did you hurt Bonies feelings?" Lyra said.

"Why did you leave the party? It just started!" Pinkie said.

Anon answered in the simplest way he could. "I need to modify my plans for the future because Bon Bon has given me vital information."

This statement only led to confuse the ponies further and cause more distress. Lyra left thinking the human was being mean. Pinkie just deflated and left sadly because she knew I wasn't going back to her party until I was ready. Twilight though, she wrote a letter to the princess about Anon's situation and the problems he was causing. Celestia wrote back about his multi personality 'problems'.

Author's Note

And there we go, short and sweet, anybody hate this character yet? He's a total dick.

To see more of him, don't forget the sequel!