The Equum Gloriae. The greatest and oldest battle arena in Equestria (and the only one sanctioned by the government). Here, ponies with "unfortunate" Cutie Marks fought in brutal battles to win prizes or prestige, or just for fun. Perfect for a mare like me.
Those with enough skill would eventually compete in the yearly Diamond League Tournament, presided over by Queen Celestia herself, perhaps even winning against every challenger and becoming the Grand Master, until they were defeated in another Diamond League Tournament. Like the current Grand Master, Crossbones.
Or like the legendary Deathbrand, who held the title for over sixty years, until he eventually died of old age. I would never admit it to anyone but my closest friends, but he had seemed like a real superhero to me when I was a foal. I even convinced Mom to make a little toy of him, which I often played with, pretending he was the real Deathbrand, fighting dastardly villains trying to take away his title as the Grand Master, in a little arena made out of books about Gladiators.
Of course, growing up made me realize that things are never that black and white.
"Are you sure you're ready?" Asked Ink Lily, for the fourth time!
"Yes, I'm sure!" I answered, frustration clear in my voice. At least she had the decency to look embarrassed.
"Sorry!" She squeaked. "It's just that, what if you go out there and you slip and hit your head on the ground or you get impaled on a unicorn or one of the Gladiators comes on to you to distract you or you hit your head on the ground or-"
"Stop!" I said, putting my hot pink hoof in her mouth. "Take a deep breath."
Taking out my hoof, I watched her inhale a worryingly large amount of air.
"Now let it out slowly, understand?" She nodded and slowly exhaled. "Good. Feel better?"
"Yeah. Sorry I freaked out on you. Again." She said, a frown on her face.
"It's okay, Lily. I know you can't help it." I said reassuringly, placing my hoof on her left cheek.
Ink Lily was my oldest and closest friend, as well as my only friend. She was the only one who actually bothered to listen to me when I babbled about ancient Gladiator history, as well as the only one who still cared about my well-being. In return I was the only one who was actually interested in reading her scribbles, as well as the only one who comforted her when she flunked out of high school. We were inseparable. But that didn't mean she liked to fight.
"Besides, I've done this before, remember?" I said, pointing to my flank. On it was a shattered pony skull, smeared with blood. It fit my name well.
Shatterhoof.
"Are you done?" Asked a voice to my left. We looked over to see one of the Arena Doctors tapping his hoof impatiently. I knew this one personally, though I was not his only patient. I didn't actually know his name, though.
"Sorry, Doctor." I said respectfully. The Arena Doctors were not to be mocked or disrespected in any way. They were the ones who were responsible for putting us back together, after all. "What is it?"
"The battle will start without you if you don't hurry up." He said, a perpetually uninterested look on his face.
"Oh, right. Thanks doc!" I said, and quickly hugged Lily, nuzzling her forcefully and getting my mane, bright golden like my eyes, all up in her face. She laughed and shoved me away
"Go, you goofball! Shoo!" She said, still giggling. I nodded and hurried towards the arena doors.
"WAIT!" I suddenly heard somepony yell. I stopped and turned around, noticing that Lily wasn't smiling anymore.
"Be careful out there." she said, a concerned look on her face.
I gave her a look of utter bewilderment, and then stepped out into the arena.
The crowd was cheering loudly, making my heart beat faster, with adrenaline coursing through my veins. In front of me were the other Gladiators. There were seven of them, three pegasi, three unicorns and one earth pony. three stallions and four mares.
There were other tournaments limited to only one race, gender, or both. To have more "fair" play. But the Diamond League Tournament had no such restrictions. Everypony was allowed. So if you wanted to be Grand Master, you had to learn how to fight Everypony!
We slowly start moving in a circle, eyes focused on each other. I search for any sign of weakness in my opponents, a limp, slight hesitation, anything that could give me an edge over my opponents.
'Come on, just give me something to work with here...'
Nothing. I sighed inwardly. This was a "competitive" tournament. Nopony would dare show any sign of weakness here. Not so early.
'Maybe I could-'
DING
Instinctively I launched myself at my nearest enemy, a pegasus, trying to cave his face in with my fore-hooves. He quickly flapped his wings to launch himself to the wall, then used his hind-hooves to propel himself at me. He was counting on me trying to dodge him, after which he would simply change direction with his cheaty wings and cave my skull in.
Unfortunately for him, I had seen that trick before, and this time I was ready for it. I jumped to meat him head-on, and once again propelled my fore-hooves towards his cranium. This time, he couldn't dodge me.
I saw his eyes widen in shock a split-second before his face imploded from the force of my earth pony strength.
'Ha! try to use your wings now, deadface!'
...
I really needed to work on my name-calling.
With no time to waste, I looked around for my next opponent just in time to see a unicorn running towards me, trying to impale me on her horn. I ducked, and she tripped on me with a surprised yelp. I then lunged myself towards her, but she quickly rolled out of the way before scrambling to get back up.
I didn't let her get that far. Pouncing on her again, I started stomping on her legs. The loud cracks were a beautiful symphony to my ears, and I was the composer. The mare scowled at me. Clearly she didn't appreciate my taste in music. She then lit her horn.
My eyes widened, and I rolled off of her just in time to not die from an ice spike to the face. I then pounced on her a third and final time, smashing her horn to pieces. I took a brief moment to enjoy her shocked expression, and then I started bashing her skull in. The thrill of taking a life would have far outweighed my sympathy, if I had any.
She did not look very pretty when I was finished. Downside, my hooves were now absolutely soaked in blood.
Wait, downside?
I raised my left fore-hoof and licked some of the delicious blood off, savoring the iron tang. My mouth curved into a wicked smile.
Then I heard the distinct sound of a magic missile. Instinctively I jumped forward, the magical energy vaporizing half of my tail. Internally berating myself for getting distracted, I looked at my newest opponent just in time to see a pegasus mare land on his back, hind-hooves first, crushing his spine. Not waiting for him to make the next move, she promptly wrapped her fore-hooves around his head and twisted. A loud crack sounded, and that was that.
I looked around the arena, checking for the others, but they were all dead, seemingly from her own doing. That gave me time to take a short rest. When only two combatants were left, they were allowed a two minute break. It was written in the Gladiator Legum Auctoritate. I let that fact calm me, taking a deep breath and holding it for a few seconds, then slowly exhaling.
'Deep breaths. Calm down. You are already guaranteed to move on to the next round. The last two always are. This is simply a matter of prestige.'
I let those thoughts calm me as I took another deep breath and looked at the dead combatants.
The other earth pony mare I saw in the beginning was torn in half, her forelegs broken in several places. Not far away was the third unicorn, his head a bloody mess. At first I couldn't find the last pegasus, but then I saw her. She was tucked away next to the furthest part of the wall from me, and practically unrecognizable. Her head was a pile of mulch, her wings were mangled and torn, and even her cutie mark had not been spared. Her hindquarters had been torn and ripped, almost as if they had been gnawed at. And judging by my opponent's bloody muzzle, that was exactly what had happened. It had probably been a grudge match.
I licked some more of the delicious blood off of my hooves, moaning a little in delight. It was just so good, how could I not enjoy it?
DING
I stood back up, and we slowly started circling each other. As per tradition, I took in her bloody majesty, committing every part of her to memory, and I saw her do the same. She was a dark violet, with a nice light purple mane, and a short tail of the same shade. I took a brief look at her Cutie Mark: Some rolled up barbed wire with a spike sticking through the hole. Covered in blood, of course.
I started smiling. This was a worthy opponent. She smiled too, but it was a different kind of smile.
"Hello there, hot flanks." She purred.
I blushed. That was not what I expected to hear.
"Uh, hi." I replied, not quite sure what to say.
"You look nice, how about we fuck?" She said, licking her lips.
"No thanks, I prefer stallions." I said, still blushing.
She raised a fore-hoof and started to lick it clean, her tongue slowly and sensually lapping up the blood, clearly giving me a show. Sweet Celestia, was that how I looked when I licked blood? I was blushing furiously now, stammering, trying to tell my tongue to work, to tell her to stop it and fight me, but my tongue refused to work.
Then she pounced, knocking me to the floor and clamping her teeth firmly on my jaw. I planted all four of my legs directly on her stomach. There was a ripping sound, and she went flying and landed harshly on the ground a few body-lengths away.
"H- urgh!" I tried to speak, but my mouth wasn't working. I slowly got back up and started walking towards her. She coughed up some blood, then stood back up as well. She looked at me and smiled wickedly.
"Didn't expect that one, did ya? Guess I win this round." She said.
I tried to respond, but ended up coughing blood up instead. Why were my legs so weak? Then I saw a jaw lying on the ground next to her.
'Wha-?'
It was hot pink, like my jaw? Then I realized it was my jaw.
'Oh. Damn.'
My legs could no longer support me, and I fell to the ground. I looked back and saw a long trail of blood. I had lost a lot of it.
I was going to die.
The pegasus mare walked up to me and lay down in front of me, and started caressing me. I wasn't complaining, not that I could.
"You know, we never did trade names. I'm Violet Spike." She said.
I gurgled.
"Oh, right. Well, I'm gonna call you Hot Pink." She said.
I gurgled again.
"I guess this is goodbye for now. I wasn't kidding you know, you are very pretty. Do you... Maybe wanna go out for lunch sometime?" She said, a bit nervous.
I let out an annoyed gurgle. This was really not the time to ask somepony out.
"Right, not a lesbian, sorry." She kissed me on the forehead. "Goodnight sweetie."
I let out a bashful gurgle, and then she cracked my head open like a watermelon.
I opened my eyes and immediately regretted it. Downside, I had a migraine again. Upside, I was alive again, but that was a given.
"Vitals are normal. Brain activity, slightly impaired. Are you feeling anything unusual?" Doc said. With my eyes closed, I could only hear him somewhere to the right of my bed.
"Just a migraine. Again." I Said.
"That's not unusual." Doc said. Whoops.
"Sorry Doc." I said.
"It would also be nice to hear a bit more gratitude from you. Resurrection isn't exactly easy, you know." Doc said.
"But you do that to errypony, erryday." I said, a bit confused.
"I know." He said. Then he sighed! I had never heard him sigh before! "Also, it's everypony, not errypony."
"Sorry Doc." I said again.
"Enough of that. You don't need to apologize for everything." Doc said.
"Sor-" I said, then promptly shut my mouth before I could embarrass myself any more.
"You should recover fully by tomorrow, provided you don't stress your mind." Doc said. "Now, your friend wants to see you. Contact me again if you start to have seizures." He said, then went away.
"Hoofy!" I heard, then something soft and huggable trapped me in its embrace. I opened my eyes again, slowly this time, and was rewarded with the sight of Lily's cute face. She smiled widely and nuzzled me.
"Ooh, I'm so glad you're safe!" She said. "I watched the whole thing. I told you somepony might distract you with sexyness. Why didn't you listen!" She pouted, staring at me with her soft, blue eyes.
"I don't think I was listening. When did you say it? " I asked her.
"Oh, nevermind. I'm just so glad you're safe!" She repeated.
As we cuddled, I thought of the pegasus mare again, Violet Spine- Spike! Violet Spike. I would definitely see her again, in the next round of the tournament. But I could also contact her sooner, perhaps tomorrow. Maybe I should take her up on her offer. I still wasn't interested in mares that way, but perhaps I could gain a friend.
I frowned. It had been a long time since I had more than one friend, but perhaps... It was time to try again? Yes, I could definitely try.
Once, I had other friends, but they abandoned me when I got my Cutie Mark. They said that I would become a cold-blooded killer, who would murder them as soon as it became convenient to me. And for a time, I believed them. I locked myself away, terrified that I would become dead inside.
Of course, growing up made me realize that they were wrong. Very wrong.
When I step out into the arene, I am never more alive.
Author's Note
Well, that was my first foray into the wonderful world of fanfiction. Was it good? Was it bad? Was it sexually depraved? Did it give you mood whiplash? Tell me in the comments section! (no, seriously, write a comment. Comments are the lifeblood of fanfiction!)