There was complete silence as everyone watched the last particles of Lord Valkaris flutter away on the wind. Then, slowly, every eye in the crowd fell upon Joey, who stood there silently, staring at the very spot where his greatest foe had disappeared.

Then chaos broke loose. Maulers began to apparate away, Minotaurs booked it, and the dragons took off into the sky, all in an urgent rush to escape. The army of rebels roared in celebration, pushing in on Joey from all sides. Everyone tried to reach out to him, to touch him, to congratulate their hero. Joey, however, looked completely overwhelmed by the massive amount of attention. The four princesses took notice of this and instantly teleported around Joey, shunting away the crowd with their wings.

"Give him space - move along now, give him space!!" Celestia said loudly, her voice cutting through the triumphant cheering of the crowd. "He needs it more than any of us could know!"

Joey gave her a grateful look, and smiled around at the other princesses. Cadance landed next to her adoptive son, wrapped her forelegs around him, and teleported to the throne room. It was completely silent, as everyone had gone outside to fight.

Joey had barely gotten a glimpse of the room, however, when Cadance showered him in kisses, holding him tighter than she ever had.

"Mom - mom!" Joey chuckled slightly, and Cadance released him. "I'm okay... it's all fine now."

Cadance studied her son's face for a second, then nuzzled his forehead. "No, it's not. But it will be."

Joey smiled slightly at his adoptive mother, but she could still see a haunted, empty look behind those hazel eyes. She gave him another hug, not a tight one, but a warm one, to let him know that everything would be okay.

"I... I know," Joey said quietly once they had released one another again. "It's just... you know - Naiose..."

Cadance lifted his chin slightly with a hoof. "I know what you're thinking, Joey - all the creatures in this room - you think they're dead because of you."

"Well, they are -" Joey said, looking distressed, but Cadance covered his mouth with a hoof.

"It was their choice to come and fight for you, Joey. Their choice," she said softly with a sad smile. "And it's not because they felt like they had to, either. They wanted freedom just as you did. They wanted justice, just as you did. They loved you, just as you loved them. You died for us all, for Celestia's sake."

When she said that last sentence, a vivid image of a man hanging on a cross flashed into Joey's mind. He looked up at his mother as soon as the vision passed. "You - you really think so? That's why they - why they came?"

Cadance kissed his forehead and smiled at him. "Beyond a doubt. Now, I believe there are three other princesses who are dying to see you - they can only stay professional after a miracle like that for so long, after all."

Joey laughed. "Okay, okay. Let's see 'em."

Cadance lither horn, and the throne room doors flew open. The other three princesses of Equestria flew through it at high speed, tackling Joey into a large ball of fur and legs. Joey found himself subject to a multitude of hugs and kisses, and he was officially at the mercy of the three.

"Mom... help!" Joey cried in a strangled voice, but Cadance merely stood there and laughed at the silly but heartwarming display.

Finally, the boy was released from their clutches, but Celestia still held him at a foreleg's length. "Can you forgive me?" she asked earnestly.

"For what?" Joey replied, bewildered.

"For the whole 'Sporco' incident," Celestia said anxiously. "I'm so sorry, I should have made an inquiry first -"

"Oh, that?" Joey asked, and to everyone's amazement, laughed. "Don't worry about that. I forgave you about that AGES ago, but the fact that you tried to apologize makes me feel a lot better about it."

Celestia smiled a teary smile and gave him a quick squeeze.

Then the aftermath actions began.

The citizens of Canterlot were overjoyed at the prospect of the end of the brief Dark Age, but were horrified as soon as they lay eyes on the ruined castle and city. They were split into groups by the princesses and assigned to different cleanup tasks.

The throne room was cleared of dead bodies, except for one other miracle. Gage had somehow miraculously recovered from the spider attack in the courtyard, and was moved to the hospital wing in the castle.

For the castle itself, it was in dire need of repair. Fortunately, every able bodied Changeling and Hippogriff happily took up the challenge, and could be seen repairing bricks out in the courtyard, singing merrily as they worked.

As for Joey, he was in the castle with the princesses, helping wherever he could with repairs. He mostly just rebuilt small things, such as vases and statues, with a simple Repairing Charm. He was just finishing up one of the stained glass windows showing the Elements banishing a strange creature when he was approached by the four princesses.

He turned to them as the broken glass returned to its original glory. "Hey," he said, watching as they stopped in front of them.

"As we are all aware of the paternal relationship between you, Princess Cadance, and Shining Armor, they'd like to make it official," Celestia said, lighting up her horn. A document flashed into her existence at her side, which she caught with magic and levitated towards Joey. "Cadance wants to give you the choice to sign again, in case you've changed your mind."

Joey looked up at Cadance, who smiled nervously at him, then down at the familiar document.

Upon signature, the child in question has no right to denounce his guardian. Upon signature, child and guardian consent to becoming a PERMANENT legal family.

Guardian Signature: Princess Mi Amore Cadenza
Child Signature:

Joey stared at the document, then smiled. A vivid image of himself writing I'm with stupid on the dotted line came to the front of his mind. He smiled brightly at Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, his mother, and bent over to write on the parchment with the quill Celestia had supplied him with. As he finished writing, he handed the document back to Celestia, who made sure to double check this time. Cadance snuck a look over Celestia's shoulder, not able to help herself. When she saw the signatures, she smiled the biggest smile she had ever smiled in a long time. (Heh)

Child Signature: Joey Steffen

CRYSTAL EMPIRE - ONE MONTH LATER...

"Ack, no, Flurry! Get off of my head!"

Flurry squealed in delight as Joey attempted to pry the baby off of his head. Despite his efforts to remove her, Joey was laughing.

"All right, all right," Cadance giggled, entering the room. "Flurry, get off of your brother - it's almost time for the surprise." She levitated Flurry off of Joey's head and into her arms. Flurry stuck out a pouting lip, and Joey laughed.

"I think she thinks my head is her favorite bed or something," Joey said lightly.

"Yeah, something like that," Cadance said, smiling down at Flurry. She looked back up at Joey. "When did you say Jo-Ann and Karen were coming over?"

"They said around five, but that's in four minutes," Joey said, glancing down at his phone. A week after the Battle of Canterlot, Twilight miraculously found Joey's backpack full of extras under a bed in one of her spare bedrooms. Joey promised her that it would be the last time he lost it - he couldn't even bear the thought of being separated from his memes for another day.

Since the battle, much had changed - Glynn and Joey, as the Head Magicians for the new Order of Illisair, had relocated the reapers to Tartarus to guard it. Since Lord Valkaris was gone, the foul creatures had no choice but to owe their loyalty to the free world.

Gage had been adopted by Princess Luna - the two had struck up a beautiful mother-son relationship during the first two weeks after the battle, and was adopted in the third week. They agreed that this would make Joey and Gage surrogate cousins, since Luna and Celestia wanted to be Joey's aunts as opposed to great-aunts. Gage and Joey soon became great friends, and wrote to one another often.

Jo-Ann and Karen had moved to hippogriff country, but visited as often as they could. Jo-Ann and Joey at this point were basically meant to be, so there were plans to have them married at the age of eighteen - the age where humans traditionally become an adult. This was an exciting and terrifying prospect for the two of them.

Glynn stayed with the Hippogriffs occasionally, but was more of a free agent in the first three weeks. As of recently, though, the princesses had given him the position of Royal Ambassador, a job he never thought he could manage. But lo and behold, he became one of the greatest ambassadors in world history.

Joey had moved in permanently with his new family - Cadance, Shining, and Flurry. Joey and Flurry struck up an almost inseparable connection, one that you would usually get if you spent hour upon hour bugging one another. Bugging one another lovingly, anyway.

Twilight visited often, usually with one or more of her friends. In the first week she brought a ton of gifts, both for Flurry and Joey, but Joey managed to convince her not to do so for himself anymore. So now it was Flurry getting all the tangible love, and everyone was happy. Twilight often found herself in friendly competition with Celestia and Luna for the 'best aunt' award, but it had simmered down immensely after Joey called them ridiculous.

The Elements of Harmony did their very best to keep in touch with Joey, who had promised to make an effort to come see them every couple of months. Every single one of the Elements were still amazed at how Joey managed to return from the dead - it confused all of them, and Joey found himself mulling it over in the hours between waking and sleeping. Nonetheless, they were his best friends that were of the equine species.

Celestia and Luna did not have to rule alone anymore - not only did Luna have a wonderful new son and both of them wonderful new nephews, they found themselves holding their respective courts with massive smiles upon their faces.

"... Joey?" Cadance asked, seeing Joey's vacant look. "Did you hear what I said?"

"Wha -? Oh, no, sorry," Joey said quickly, shaking his head. "Would you mind repeating it?"

"I said, 'let's go to the kitchen - dinner's about to start'," Cadance said with an air of secrecy.

Joey looked at his mother curiously. "Are you hiding something from me?"

Cadance batted her eyes at the ceiling. "What? No - me? Never."

"Yeah. You're real convincing," Joey said with a shadow of a grin. "Let's see what you've got."

"What I've got? Moi?" said Cadance seriously. "I've got nothing - it's just normal dinner."

"Mm-hm. Okay."

The two of them shared a laugh as they walked to the dining hall. As they approached the doorway leading into it, Joey saw that the room beyond was dark.

Cadance walked into the darkness and vanished. Joey paused, listening hard for his mother. No clopping sounds of hoofs on the marble floor could be heard.

So what did he do?

Joey goosestepped into the room obnoxiously, saying in a loud voice, "Wow, sure is dark in here. Good thing it's so dark, because I can't see where I'm going. It's so dark in here, it's black and stuff. I sure hope nobody's planning a surprise party on me, because I'd be veeeeeeeery surprised!"

Shining Armor clicked on the light, looking slightly deflated. "You're no fun."

"Moi?" Joey asked as Cadance ambushed him with a long nuzzle on the neck. "The name's Joey. Party Pooper Extraordinaire. I specialize in pooping your parties, with money-back guarantee!!"

"Your sarcasm reaches a whole new level," Cadance laughed.

Joey looked up and saw a large banner that read:

17 - Happy Birthday, Joey!! - 17

"Okay, now I'm surprised," Joey laughed. "I completely forgot that my birthday even existed."

"Well, that's what family's for, then, isn't it?" Cadance said happily.

"What - reminding me when my birthday is?" Joey asked with an ornery air.

"If you need us to," Cadance quipped, not missing a beat.

"Wow - WOW. Thanks, mom," Joey laughed, accepting the roast while feeling humbled. Cadance wrapped him up in a hug, and was shortly joined by Shining Armor. Flurry sat on his head. Joey chuckled and hugged his surrogate parents back.

"I love you guys."

"We love you, too," Cadance replied warmly. "More than life itself."

Author's Note

HOLYCRAP WHOLLYCRAP HOLEYCRUP it's done! I can take a nap now...

Thank you to Makerofthebuttswagger for making this story! Wait a minute...

And, of course, many thanks to Coyote de La Mancha, who has helped me develop as a writer immensely by reviewing EACH AND EVERY one of my chapters. Thank you!

And, of course, thank you to all my readers (especially the ones who have stuck with me this whole time - hats off to you)!

To celebrate, I am taking the summer off - so, in other words, I'll be active until June 6, 2019, and I'll return sometime in August. Stay fresh!

~Makerofthebuttswagger