Laugh stretched his legs as he walked amongst the halls of his alma mater. The annual garage sale that his former high school held for charity every year was all hooves on deck for volunteers, requiring him to join forces with dozens of alumni to help sort through the donations, organize, price, and sell them. For his case, Laugh was working in the section devoted to magical lighting. He was using a specialized stand loaned from his friend to help test and repair any donated lights.

“Ugh, checking each and every one of these is getting annoying, Fixture.”

Light Fixture, master repairpony of all things luminous, shrugged. “It can't be helped, Laugh. We've done this every year for the sale for the past eight years, and I don't plan on stopping. We gotta support our old stomping grounds, right?” He held out his hoof, and they hoofbumped, reciting their old school cheer.

“Goooo, Falcons! Rah rah rah!”

“I hate to interrupt your moment, but are you two working this section of the sale?” The pair of unicorn stallions turned to face a third, older stallion of the unicorn tribe. He was glancing over the lights that were on display. “I was wondering how much that costs,” he explained, gesturing with a hoof to the merchandise.

Laugh nodded, nudging his friend out of the way. “Go polish the lamp over there Light, I got this one.” Light Fixture obliged, but kept an ear turned toward the conversation. “Well sir, that light there is, if you hadn't guessed, a desk lamp. It's priced at ten bits, and-”

“No, no! Not that thing, that thing!” The customer pointed again. “That's what I wanna buy! How much is it?”

Laugh took a half step back in surprise. “The… the testing rig? We brought that in to fix any damaged lights. You can't take that.”

“Well, why not? This is a sale, right?”

Laugh nodded. “Yeah, this is a sale, but I don't see what that has to do with-”

“And this stand is AT the sale, yeah?”

“Yes, but-”

“So since it's at the sale, that means it's for sale! So how much is it?”

Laugh fought back his ‘are you bucking kidding me right now’ face and smiled, trying a different tactic. “Well, we are currently using it to fix this light, so why don't you come back in a few minutes so we can talk?”

The stallion huffed in annoyance, but resigned himself to Laugh's words. “Fine. I'll go to the bathroom and come back. Have it ready by then!” He trotted off, leaving a bewildered and annoyed Light Fixture trotting up to Light.

“Are you nuts?!” He whispered angrily. “You bought us five minutes, tops. How are you gonna turn him away with no prep time?”

Laugh track smirked, a devious grin spreading across his face. He levitated some tape and a marker into view. “Oh, I'm not gonna do it. You are.”

“I'm back! Are you done fooling around with that light, or are you just playing with it like those colts in the toy section?”

Laugh track cantered up to the stallion with a ‘customer service’ face. That is to say, a big, forced grin. “Ah, welcome back! I hope the bathroom wasn't crowded, I might need to use it later. Anyway, the maintenance rig is right here, but I'm not authorized to sell it. The ‘boss’ of this section is right here!” Laugh all but shoved Light Fixture in front of the customer. “Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to eat some of this conveniently placed popcorn.” Laugh placed a folded piece of paper in front of him as a makeshift sign. It read, ‘Regulated Union Break. Be Back In ∞’.

The stallion rolled his eyes and turned his attention to Light Fixture. “Right… so, I was hoping to purchase that stand,” he pointed once more to the maintenance stand.

“Ah, that,” Light replied, “is not for sale, my good sir. If you look closely, you can see that it's marked-” Rather prominently displayed on the stand was a piece of tape with ‘NFS’ written on it. “N. F. S. Not for sale.”

The stallion growled in frustration. “But this place is a sale! And I want to buy a thing at the sale, so you should sell it!”

“Oh my Celestia. Look,” Light was getting fed up with this guy. “You can't buy the lockers in the hallway. You can't buy the ponies working here, or the tables we put the merchandise on, or the water fountains. There is stuff at sales that isn't for sale, and that stand is one of them! Look, you really want it? It cost me a thousand bits. Hoof that much over and it's yours.”

“This is an outrage! I'm going to go find a manager and have you two fired!” The stallion stormed off, infuriated. Laugh track trotted back over to Light's side.

“He, uh, knows we're volunteers, right?”

“Buck if I know.”

“Uh… ‘scuse me?” Laugh and Light noticed a colt, no older than ten, walk up to them. “My daddy told me to come try and buy that funny looking lamp from you. He said you would sell it to a foal.”

Light let out an exasperated sigh. “Hey Laugh, do you think I could possibly facehoof hard enough to knock myself out?”

“I doubt it.”

The colt perked up. “Oh, there's my daddy! And some old mare.” The three turned and looked, noticing the angry customer returning with the school's principal.

“Miss Slide Rule! Nice to see you,” Laugh greeted his old teacher. “How are you?”

“I've been better. This stallion dragged me over here saying you won't sell him a lamp?”

Light glared at the stallion, who was grinning as though he had the upper hoof. “He wants to buy my expensive, custom-built repair stand. You saw us bring it in this morning to fix the lights, remember?”

“Oh, yes, I remember that. Well, I'm afraid it is their stand, so they can choose not to sell it, sir. I suggest you drop the mater.”

“FINE! But I'm calling the Better Business Bureau and having this place shut down!” He stomped off in a rage with his colt in tow.

With a final question of, “He really thinks he can get a charity event at a school shut down? Or did he expect to shut down the school?” Slide Rule also left the area.

Light fixture breathed a sigh of relief. “Glad that's over with.”

Laugh track chuckled. “Hey Light, how much for the maintenance stand?”

“Don't you start.”

“But it's a SALE!”

“Alright, you can have it free of charge…” Light picked up the stand in his magic and levitated it towards his friend. Laugh turned tail and started galloping away. “...after I shove it down your throat! Hold still!”

Author's Note

The customer is always right, except for 95% of the time.

Also I need to get that 'Regulated Union Break. Be Back In ∞' line on a shirt.