Chocolate Chaos

by Sandstorm94

Rating: mature
Tags: Pinkie Pie, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Profanity, Discord, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Romance, Anon, Porn, Second Person, Rainbow Dash
Length: 10489

You are Anon, formerly Josh Winchester, and have been living in Equestria for six months. When Twilight finally snaps over your love of chocolate milk, things get chaotic.

You are Anon.

Well, you are now anyway. When your life gets turned on its head after running from the mob, you ended up in Equestria. Six months have gone by, and things have settled into a "normal" routine. When the Princess of Friendship finally loses her lid from your love of chocolate milk, Chaos comes knocking.

Contains a variety of different things, NO SPOILERS!

Published 2019-02-28 22:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-02-28 22:50:01 UTC

This is why you should never spill the chocolate milk Twilight

It was another beautiful day in magic pony land. The birds were chirping, stores were in full swing all over Ponyville, and the midday sun was spreading a cascade of color from the walls of the Castle of Friendship.

But you don't care.

To everyone in this sickly sweet land, you are Anonymous, or Anon for short. However, that was not always the case.

You used to be Josh Winchester, a high profile banker in New York City. You had a wife and two kids, a nice sports car, and you thought that life was going very smoothly. However, one day it all came crashing down. Your boss got caught in a money laundering scheme, and the whole branch was shut down with all positions terminated.

Your wife became worried, and for very good reason. Your only other living relative, your grandmother, was in a nursing home in West Virginia living off the last bit of pension that had been set aside for her care. Luckily, you were able to draw unemployment checks, but the amount received was nowhere near what you needed to keep your house. With applications falling flat, receiving no response, and you desperate to maintain the life you had, you resorted to a measure that would prove to be your downfall…

You turned to the mob.

For a few weeks, things were stable, but several more job offers that ended empty-handed made you realize that Death was going to come and take everything you had, including your family. Not wanting them to suffer an unfairly cruel fate, you told your wife what had taken place, and said your final goodbyes. Your wife, who had been with you through the thick and thin, was not angry about the sacrifice and accepted the fact you had to leave by kissing your lips.

That last kiss was bittersweet, for it was a testament to your love but also the last time you ever would share with her. With the mob on your heels and a bounty on your head, you did the only logical thing you knew, you grabbed your car keys and took off cross country. At first, you had a bit of luck, managing to stay a few steps ahead and staying under the radar, but all that changed on an alpine pass in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado.

You were heading west after a stop in Denver when a twist of fate occurred. Coming around a sharp corner, you were blindsided by an elk, causing you to swerve and the car to go through the guardrail. One moment you were tumbling down the mountainside, the next you were in a hospital bed at Ponyville General. Faking amnesia as a precaution, you told the nurse you couldn't remember your name, and the moniker Anon is what you have gone by since.

In the six months since that fateful day, things have settled down and changed drastically. Once feared by the population, except by that weirdo Lyra Heartstrings, you are now treated just like any other resident of the town. You even have a job, being recruited by Starlight in being her secretary, but despite being a boring job it was still a source of income. Another thing that had changed was your stance with the ‘more eager’ mares.

Being the down-to-Earth, loyal family man that you were, the thought of rolling in the hay with someone other than your wife appalled you at first; but as the days turned into weeks it became painstakingly clear that doing it with a willing pony would be the only way to avoid having unbearable blue balls. Rainbow was the first, and after a near incident with Ponk using a cannoli former, she became the only, pony you dared to come near your member.

You enjoyed those sessions, what started out as an occasional fuck turning and blossoming into something you considered a second love. It often did you good to come home after a boring day at work to find the prismatic pegasus already laying on your bed with her tail flagged and her flower soaking wet. As much as you loved those days, this was not one of them.

With the School of Friendship on summer break, and Rainbow and her friends off saving Equestria again, you found yourself alone in the Castle of Friendship, bored and watching over the place like a lazy cat without a care in the world that craves lasagna instead of rodents.

Damn, it is a shame the girls took Spike with them, the two of you could have played Ogers&Oubliettes but oh fucking well.

Instead, you are catching up on the latest Daring Do novel, ”Daring Do and The Curse of Elune”, and under all the smoke and mirrors that the novel portrays you feel it is a nod of respect to Luna. The fact the Collar of Elune was Daring’s only hope of lifting the curse, in addition to having to fight a demented succubus version of herself, only added to your theory. On the table beside your bean bag chair, an empty plate rests with the remains of your oatmeal cookies, and beside that was a filled glass of your most beloved beverage.

The sweet, sweet nectar known as chocolate milk.

It was the most wonderful beverage in the world, the perfect blend of cow teat extract, sugar, and cocoa powder mixed together in harmony and there was nothing in your mind that could trump it. Water, coffee, and tea all paled in comparison to the way chocolate milk made your taste buds sing an angelic chorus from the wonderful flavor, and no pony was going to tell you otherwise.

Well, except Purple Smart…

That arrogant alicorn was the embodiment of the thing you hated most on Earth: a know-it-all in a position of power. Every time you tried to explain how something worked back home, she would write it down then lecture you about how the fundamental laws of magic and nature would make such a situation impossible. It infuriated you, making you mad enough that you swore to never call her by her name, and stuck to using Purple Smart or Starbutt as a way to get even.

I made her mad, and you knew it, but revenge is a dish best served cold after all.

What really got under your skin was not Starbutt’s persistent argument against everything that you knew to exist, but her bitter hatred towards chocolate milk and everything that had lactose. You found it both strange and condemning, a hatred that you could only assume was intolerance; but after your dear fuckmare Rainbow told you about an incident that traumatized the alicorn in Magic Kindergarten involving the cooties and a piece of cheese, it was understandable.

Probably the only time you would ever feel sorry for the Princess of Friendship, but you felt that was more her problem than yours.

So, using the alone time and having the keys to the castle to your advantage, you boldly had taken the last gallon of chocolate milk you had in your fridge with you to the library area as a direct statement that you were going to have your chocolate milk regardless of the consequences.

“Anon, you there? Me, Spike and the girls are back from saving Horseton from the Creature of Hayseed Swamp.”

Oh fuck, this is bad.

Leaping to your feet, you stash the gallon underneath a vacant study bench and pile books in front of it. Hoping against hope that she will take her time trying to find you, you eye the glass still on the table, the only bit of evidence she would need to lecture you again.

Or worse, use you as a test subject.

Making a mad dash across the room like a coyote after a roadrunner, you think that you were going to be home free. However, just as you reach the glass, that bitch named Karma decided to fuck you in the ass. Suddenly surrounded by an all-too-familiar aura, you knew that you have royally bucked up.

“Hello Anon, I am pleased to see that the castle is still standing and clean. However, that does not outweigh the fact that you are deliberately drinking that disgusting beverage in my castle when my back was turned. Considering we have had multiple lectures and you are still too thick to get my point, I'm going to take more drastic measures this time.”

A shiver, unlike anything you ever felt shot up your spine at her tone, a cold sweat forming as the deep pools of magenta in her eyes darkened until they were nearly black. Making her way across the room with the only sound being her steps, she locked in on her prize as she stopped in front of the glass.

“Tell me Anon, just how much do you love this glass of chocolate milk?”

Her question twisted your guts, stomach acid threatening to come out your mouth at the implications.

“Just as much as you love your hot sauce Pur-... Twilight.”

She raises her eyebrow at your response, a smirk pulling at the edges of her life as she begins to chuckle like a villain.

“Anon… Anon… Anon… Do you honestly think addressing me by my actual name for the first time in months is going to get you off scot-free? I got news for you, it doesn't, and as far as my love of the sauce I am nowhere near as addicted as I used to be since I started developing stomach issues. Now, you see this glass? This glass is your addiction, and I'm your intervention.”

You are briefly puzzled by what she meant, until she leveled her grin at you. It could freeze Windigos and give Luna nightmares, but as you looked into those soulless pits of revenge, you knew that she was about to permanently cross the line with you.

*tap*... *tap*...

The sound of tapping glass diverted your eyes downward, and what you saw made you pale. Purple Smart had her right wing outstretched, a single primary feather resting against the smooth, fragile surface.

She wouldn't.

“Now Tw-”

*tap tap tap*

“Yes, Anon? I'm just testing how pure the glass is by checking its resonance.”

*tap...tap*

“And judging by the way it sounds, this glass has several flaws that make it more brittle than one made by a master craftspony. Now, my primary feather by itself can't break it, but just a little bit of force will cause it to tip over and shatter, wouldn't want that now don't we?”

That evil little bitch…

“Please don't spill my milk, I promise not to betray your trust on this again. Let me drink it and leave, and I will do anything you ask as long as you don't spill it.”

Just a slight push, only visible by the beverage starting to gather on one side.

“Please don't do this, you wouldn't do this to a friend, would you? I mean, you are the Princess of Friendship and all that.”

The wing pushed further, the mana-like nectar threatening to have a containment breach.

“No, I wouldn't do this to a friend, and I do forgive you; however, you still broke several of the castle rules, rules that even I have to follow myself. If I even let you off with a warning, it shows that the rules are ok to broken with no consequences.”

She tilts the glass halfway, some of the drink spilling over the lip of the vessel.

“Purple Smart don't do it!”

Too late.

She did it, she actually fucking did it. The glass yawed to the side, spilling its contents in the process, before rolling and unceremoniously shattering on the crystal floor and to be refilled nevermore.

You are Discord.

The Chaos Lord, The One of Disharmony, The Foe of Harmony. All those titles and more fit your resumé, your escapades being the stuff of legend that will be told for generations to come. However, since becoming friends with Fluttershy, you found yourself being more careful about what you did.

The Stare was not something to be messed with after all, it still caused you to suffer just at the mere mention of it. Even after dealing with countless monsters and threats over the centuries, several of which you directly created, you would rather be turned back into a statue than to look into those pits of torment ever again.

You currently were in your home in Chaosville, the chaotic place that you called home. To be more specific, you were inside your house in Chaosville, watching various events around Equus to see if it needed Twilight and her friends’ attention. The last one, an outbreak of consentacles, really did a number on your body since they were immune to chaos magic so you were recovering when an alarm went off.

“Disturbance in the lactate, there is,” Turning your head, you looked at your visiting sister Eris, who was busy milking chocolate milk out of her breasts. “Someone just spilled a perfectly good glass of chocolate milk, let's see who the culprit is.”

It always amazed you how she was always able to multitask, especially since a wizard in white cursed her several centuries ago to cause her E cup mammaries to never stop lactating the chocolatey goodness. With her hands preoccupied, her horns glowed with raw chaos magic as a screen appeared, replaying the events that took place in the castle.

“So Twilight finally snapped it seems,” Eris chucked, a gleam coming to her eyes as she looked at her cross-dimensional brother. “I was wondering how long it would take for her to flip her lid at Anon for his love of my milk, but I admire the fact she lasted longer than I thought she would. That being said, and considering their history, I have a plan for a prank that should help them both get along a little better.”

“Will it get me in hot water with Fluttershy?”

She smirked, a smirk that always, someway somehow, ended up backfiring for you.

“No my dear brother it won't, besides we need a bit more chaos to restore the town's energy levels. Anyways, in the event that sweet pegasus gives you any issue, just blame me and I will take whatever rant she is going to give. The same goes for Twilight and Anon, or has being around the Element of Kindness made you lose your nerve?”

Goddamnit, she hit you where it hurts, and your pride wasn't about to go down without a fight.

“Really E? You should know better than to tempt the baddest D in all the land!”

“Tell that to Big Mac, I dare you on the Chaos Gems.”

Oh hell no, not after last time, and with Rainbow's speed, it was a constant reminder of an idiotic blunder. Against your better judgment, you sulked over to your sister, who whispered her plan in your ear.

You liked what she had in mind.

The chaotic side of you wanted to jump in and accept, no matter what it was, but your friendship to Fluttershy was far more valuable. It was a good plan, a chaotic plan, and one that had just enough justice thrown in that the only ones that were going to be mad were the two victims of choice.

“Oh, this is going to be fun…”

With a snap of your talon, popcorn appeared as you and Eris reclined back and prepared for the show.

You are Twilight Sparkle.

You hope that the message you just sent finally got your point across to Anon. Ever since he arrived, he had done nothing but test your nerves and nearly pushed you past your breaking point of multiple occasions. Each time, you were able to calm yourself down, but violating your trust while off on a protection mission? That was something that you had to take action on, and destroying his precious was the only thing you could think of.

“Well, Anon, I hope that this teaches you not to betray somepony's trust. I honestly don't know how Rainbow would act if you went behind her back and sold her 1st Edition autographed Daring Do books to buy her an expensive present.”

By the look on his face, you knew you had him.

“Go fuck yourself Starbutt! I care about her way too much to do something like that to her.”

“Yet, just a few minutes ago you were trying to throw my title on me to avoid punishment. To me, that just shows how addicted you are to that Discordian beverage, and that you have a long way to go in breaking yourself from under its’ curse. I beat my addiction Anon, and I’ve been feeling better than I ever had. Oh, for the record, I could rut myself silly with the right combination of spells, and it will feel better than whatever you feel.”

Anon's face turned apple red in anger, and you knew you had him beat.

“You don't have the balls to do anything!”

Karma, sweet mistress, oh how you love her so.

A brilliant blue light flooded the room, originating from the shattered glass that lay on the floor, and a powerful magic entered you with such force that it dropped you to your fetlocks. You tried using your own, but every attempt to tap into your own mana pool failed as sparks fell harmlessly to the floor as your body started to tingle.

A pressure, like trying to squeeze a hot air balloon out of a toothpaste tube, built behind your forehooves. Gritting your teeth, you tried flexing the frogs of your hooves, the soft tender flesh throbbing in pain with each movement until it all released at once.

With a sickening, slurping crack, your hoof nails shattered.

Cringing from the pain, you watched as your frog shifted and started to change shape. Five appendages slowly formed from the flesh as your tendons, muscles, and bones split apart in your fetlocks and reformed thinner and more dainty. Your fur thinned as the changes progressed upwards, elbows snapping and locking so they bent in the complete opposite direction as they normally do. Through the painful experience, a thought pushed its way to the forefront of your brain.

Wait a second, my forehooves turned into hands and my forelegs are now arms… A-am I turning into a human?!?!

You watched in a mixture of confusion and pain as the changes continued, your shoulders becoming narrower as your wings doubled in size and the number of vertebrae in your spine reduced to support your new upper body. A terrible headache formed as your skull slightly shifted, your muzzle becoming smaller and your face rounder as it took on a half pony/half human look. The pain briefly paused, luring you into a false sense of security, before your ribcage compacted and your waist shrunk into an hourglass figure.

Pleasure replaced pain as your teats crawled their way up your stomach, gaining fat and highly sensitive nerves as the D cupped mammaries settled on your chest, your dark purple nipples throbbing and begging to be played with. With your hips rotating into a bipedal, unguligrade stance and giving you childbearing hips anyone on the other side of the mirror would want, an intense heat fired off in your core as your butt gained fat and your labia and clit shifted forwards.

Using a tip you gained from one of Sunset's infamous sleepovers, you plunge your left middle and index fingers into your love tunnel, the velvety walls already slick as you pump in and out while using your thumb to rub and flick your hot button. A brief release poured through you like honey, only for the heat to reignite like a pissed off Reaper pepper as your nipples twitched in unsatisfied agony. Using your free hand, you did your best to keep an even rhythm, but the chain orgasms were wearing down on your stamina until finally it hit its crescendo. A throaty, lustful moan escaped past your lips as you finally climaxed, your walls clenching down and tightening around your fingers as you add on to the pile of cum already pooled between your legs.

Images filled your mind of a nice, plump flanked mare underneath you, riding a strap-on the same color as your fur. Letting the scene and lust carry your mind away, you started to rock your hips in time with how it was playing out in your head. Faster and faster you rocked your hips, thrusting to the point your fingers were a blur, before your mental climax hit and the specially designed strap-on pumped your cum into the pinned mare's pussy.

Coming out of your endorphin high, you noticed several things seemed off. First, your insides seemed lighter, as if a weight had been removed by the explosive climax you just had. The next thing you noticed was how, even after releasing a large quantity of cum, your walls were still wet and clamped down on your fingers. However, your walls seemed tighter than normal and after a few minutes they pushed your fingers out as your folds sealed up shut and started to descend as a pair of testicles.

What the hay?!

Then you felt it.

Your clit, which had not retreated back into its hood, suddenly rippled and pulsed, throbbing with an intensity you never felt before as it pushed against your fingers. It slowly grew, swelling in both length and girth, and changed from its normal fleshy pink to molted purple. As the final wave of pleasure coursed through you and you cummed out your new cock for the first time, the magic finally fading from your body. Standing still and flabbergasted at your new organ, you cut your eyes up to the mist in front of you, wondering what Fate had in store for Anon.

You are Anon, and boy did you fuck the pooch this time.

After arguing with Starbutt, culminating in a dare, a strange mist appeared and blocked you from the alicorn's vision. On the bright side, you were no longer suspected like a wet noodle dangling from chopsticks, but on the downside the sudden cutoff in magic had dropped you to the floor. You always knew that bitch Karma would come to collect her debt, even after fucking you over by Twilight catching you before you could drink your milk, but with the mist causing your body to feel like it was receiving a constant static shock was getting on your nerves.

Deciding to experiment, you clutched your right hand into a fist and tried punching through it, only to have it react like rubber and absorb the impact. Punch after punch, kick after kick, shove after shove, desperation kicked in as a feeling of claustrophobia started to set in.

“Hey, Starbutt! Can you please help me?!?!”

No answer, in fact, you realized that you couldn't hear anything outside of the mist.

”What kind of fucked up bullshit is this stuff? It solidifies on impact and is blocking sound, I got a bad feeling about this…”

The itching sensation suddenly increased, forcing you to shed out your clothes and scratch at your skin, only for you to see a green peach fuzz crawling and growing over your form like mold on bread. Laying on your back, you tried ripping handfuls of the alien covering from your skin, only to yelp in pain at the fact it was stuck and getting thicker like being wrapped like a soft fur carpet.

Fur.

You were growing fur.

Desperation set in as you tried once again to break the barrier, only to double over in pain as your back popped, each vertebrae cracking, shrinking, and reforming as the skin around your chest suddenly felt tight. Pain flared from your nerves as your rib cage swelled, pushing and rounding into a barrel as your midsection increased in size. With your body now fully covered in green fur, it was hard for you to visually see the changed as they progressed, instead having to rely on your sense of touch as your hips locked you into a quadruped position.

Your fingers and toes, numb and tingling as if they were suffering from extreme frostbite, curled in on themselves as flesh poured over them like clay. The individual bones and joints contracted and fused, leaving you with a set of delicate hooves as your wrists widened and the tendons twisted to support their new purpose.

The contents of your stomach rejected themselves, making you roll onto your side to keep from choking on your own vomit. As it came up, you felt your organs twist and knot, rearranging themselves as they changed to your developing species as your tailbone separated and broke through your skin to form your dock.

“Wh-why is this happening to me?!”

Any further attempts to make a sound were stopped as your throat started to burn, your Adam's apple shrinking away as the vocal cords thinned and tightened, making your pained whines higher and higher in pitch. With your neck rotated to that of a pony posture, an immense pressure spiked in your head as your skull jutted outward, blood coming out your nose as it joined your lips and jaws as a muzzle

A ringing filled your ears, forcing you to cover them with your forehooves and felt in horror as they sealed and pulled themselves inward. For those few, brief moments your perception of the world was cut off, not even able to hear the panicked voices in your head screaming and begging for the process to stop. As quick as it had left, your sense of sound returned but amplified as if they had built-in speakers on the eardrums. With the cartilage rising out your head like two fuzzy peaks, you raised a hoof to feel one, only to have it twitch and turn away. The heightened sense of sound was a bonus, but your heart sunk at the fact you could hear the faint sound of crunching bones that weren't your own.

“So, she must be changing too…”

As much as you wanted to blame her for turning you into a pony, the fact she was changing as well meant that someone else was a fault. You wanted to be mad, but lust filled your mind at the sweet scent of a mare's arousal. Playing it off as your mind trying to cope with the changes, you carefully began to stroke your throbbing shaft, doing your best not to pinch it between your frogs. The more you stroked, the hotter your body became, the pleasure running through you like a fiery stampede that distracted you from the fact your eyes were changing shape.

Reopening your eyes after releasing your first bit of precum, the floor looked brighter and more alive than it had previously and leading you to conclude that your eyes were that of a pony. With the first wave settling and the churning in your balls returning, you decided to throw caution to the wind and ramp up the pace of your hoofjob. Moaning in pleasure, you froze your administrations, realizing that the sound coming out of your mouth was far higher in pitch than it had any right to be.

The feeling of a vacuum forming in your gut only confirmed the fear that had just back hammered into your mind. Your cock, which was still dribbling bits of pre, flared for one last time and soaked your stomach in the sticky white excretion that had given life to your children. With its load spent, your sac deflated like a spent balloon, tugging and dwindling back into your body as you felt the beginning stages of your vaginal walls start to tunnel into you like a miner searching for the motherload.

“Please no…”

Your whimpering went unheard by the universe. The former testicles finished their inward journey, the last bit of muscle that was holding them close together swelling and turning into your placenta as the testes themselves turned into your new ovaries. For the first time in your life, your flower opened and released its scent, drenching your growing tail hair in its nectar and driving you wild with lust.

The fact your cock was now a winking clit was lost on you, the heat radiating from your folds making you rub it as fast as you could to orgasm. You could feel it coming, building like how the sea pulls back before a tsunami, and unlike how your male sensitivity was just on your tip the feeling was all over. You didn't realize your teats forming as you orgasmed, your walls clenching at air and not satisfied at the fact that you were empty.

Rainbow, your sweet, loving marefriend, came to mind. You knew she had a few strap-ons from before you started fucking her, and her filling you with one felt both wrong and natural. It felt wrong in the regard of being violated in a way you never felt before, but it was that same reasoning that felt right. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you let loose a moan like never before as you climaxed, matting your tail against you and leaving you heavily panting as the mist started to dissipate.

“Anon, is that you?”

Your brain bitch slapped itself back to reality, forcing you to look dead at the alicorn as your body heats up in a blush. Glancing at her form, your jaw drops at the fact her upper torso was human-like, you wanting to bury your head in her breasts and motorboat them.

Tracing her form downwards, you admired her curves and hips, accented by her toned legs that made her look like a Playboy supermodel. However, what caught your attention and made your body squirm in need, was the erect cock dangling between her legs. The heat in your folds ramped up to a new level, your tunnel a furnace as it clinched at the air as you wanted her inside of you. It was unbearable, making you squirm and flop like a decked fish before you felt the alicorn's magic wash over you and dampen the fire.

“I am seriously going to have Fluttershy give Discord a lecture for this, is the estrus dampener working?”

If that was what that spell was, then you were thankful it existed so you could think clearly, and not about how many times in one session Twilight’s cock could stuff her baby batter into your oven.

“Uh… yeah, it is. I suppose I owe you a favor for keeping me from pouncing on you and betraying Rainbow's trust. What makes you think this was Discord's doings? He is nowhere around here, because he would have tripped the silent alarms you set in place for his presence.”

Her horn came to life, her magic sweeping both over you and the floor and removing all traces of cum, your coat smelling like lavender as a result.

Not that you minded, it was your favorite flower.

“Chaos magic is… unpredictable. It doesn't obey the normal laws of physics, and can run rampant. Here on Equus, there are two fundamental forces: Order, and Chaos. There can be no Order if there is only Chaos, and no Chaos if there is only Order. Order prefers no interruptions, with everyone doing the things they should do that won't disrupt the way things should be. Chaos, on the other hoof, prefers to throw as many kinks and bends in Order's plans as possible, and can target anyone from any point. Only when the two are in perfect flux can there be true Harmony, and that is the natural state of the universe since it can’t default to perfect Order, nor succumb to Chaos’ temptations.”

For once, something Purple Smart said made sense on a level you could understand and relate to.

“So when you shattered my glass, it appeased Chaos…”

Twilight nodded, a slight gleam forming in her eyes.

“Correct! Now, both Discord and his sister Eris are constructs of Chaos manifested into a physical form. The glass shattered must have sent out a vibration that could only be felt by Chaos beings, so they must be doing this either as a highly unamusing prank or to try and teach us a lesson of some sort. Making me a pony/human hybrid is surprising, but considering how jaded your view of me is, that is why they made you a mare.”

For some reason, whether it was from the mini-lesson or the trauma from the transformation, that was your breaking point.

“Are you bucking serious?! In all your seemingly-infinite wisdom, have you once thought to ask me WHY I give you the cold shoulder? Sweet Celestia! I had no idea that you were that self-centered, which is, in fact, part of the reason why I do not like you. You are the Princess of Friendship, but your title should be the Princess of Know-it-alls.

Every single Faust damn time that you asked me to tell me about my home, you went through and dissected like a mortician. It made me feel stupid Twilight, so I figured screw you and just let me live my life without your constant criticisms. Yet, you wouldn't let me even have that, constantly grilling me about the fact I love chocolate milk, yet it is now the only reminder I have from the nice life I had before everything hit the fan. I've lost my job, home, family, and now my humanity. Would it hurt for you to let me at least have that comfort?!”

Tears built, and the wall that you had made of steel around your mind failed in one swift motion. Putting your forehooves over your eyes, you let loose all the emotional pain that you had suppressed and let build up, recalling step by step as you were left more and more alone. Rainbow was your only solstice, the light in your darkened mind that helped pull you day by day. Nopony, not even her, should see you like this, but you couldn't help yourself. To your surprise, you were pulled up into a hug, Twilight gently nuzzling your cheek.

“Anon, I’m sorry, I didn't realize how much I was hurting you. I was trying to help you move on by saying things like television and cars are not possible here, which they aren't, to try and move you straight to acceptance so you could adjust here quicker. I really hope we can start over, and do this the right way, that is if you want to.”

Ignoring the fact how close your folds were to Twilight's cock, no doubt soaking it in your juices by now, you nuzzled into her neck.

“Thanks for the apology Twilight, and I would like to at least try to have a proper friendship. Now, onto more pressing matters, how am I going to explain this to Rainbow? You got a cock, and my body was so horny before you dampened it I was fighting the urge to pounce and have you pop my cherry.”

She blushed, how cute.

“Well, that's easy to do. We just tell Rainbow that we had a minor dispute and Discord decided to make things fun for him. The hard part is going to be how to quench your heat, because I know from experience no dildo or strap-on will satisfy your need. I could do it, but I do not want to get on Rainbow's bad side, nor drive a wedge between the two of you.”

Ever so slightly you lower your folds towards the alicorn’s new Twicane.

“Could you use your magic to teleport her here? Normally after you girls get back from saving Equestria she goes down of a 16-hour nap, but I think she might make an exception since this matter is concerning me.”

The look in Twilight's eyes was one of inspiration. Gently setting you down, she teleported away and returned about twenty minutes later with the prismatic pegasus. Just the sight of you, with your muzzle caked from guzzling what was left of the gallon, made her jaw drop.

“Smoking Spitfire! Wow Anon, Discord really did a number on you, and don't worry, I'm going to give him the flankwhipping of a lifetime next time I lay eyes on him. He is going to get these hooves.”

Hoping up on her hind legs and striking a boxer pose, a fight between her and Rocky seemed like a good idea for a story. That is if you could figure out how to write with hooves.

“Look Rainbow, as much as I would love to see that happen, I got a much bigger issue right now. The transformation put me in heat, and since you don't have a cock, is it ok if Twilight ruts me?”

Glancing between you and Twilight, she hovered over and booped your nose, causing you to sneeze and go cross-eyed.

“I would say go ahead, but how about I suggest something else? What if I got Egg Head to give me a cock too, that way we can spit roast you. I hope you realize that even if she uses an antipregnancy spell, since you’re in heat there's still a chance of fertilizing you.”

That little detail had crossed your mind, but the thought of having Rainbow's foal made your ovaries pulse in anticipation.

“Twilight, I swear, if Rainbow gets me pregnant I swear on my love of chocolate milk that you will be its godparent and can run whatever tests you feel like on me during the pregnancy as long as the foal isn't harmed. Right now, and I honestly can’t believe I'm about to say this, all I need is to be rutted and filled to the brim. Now, are you going to give Rainbow a battering ram or not?”

Both Rainbow and Twilight stared at each other for a long minute. Neither moved, the silent conversation being lost on you as Rainbow gave a slight nod. The alicorn's horn came to life, covering Rainbow's crotch as she started to buck her hips. You knew what was happening, going as far as fanning your tail to give Rainbow a strong dose of your scent just to add a bit of encouragement. The glow went away after a few minutes, and you couldn't help but drool at the sight of Rainbow's new equipment.

“Remember Rainbow, considering that Anon is a virgin for the moment, you have to take things slow. The reason I am warning you is considering your speed induced track record, if you go too fast you could permanently injure her in ways spells can't fix.”

Twilight's warning had hit its mark, making Rainbow gulp and worry blaze into her eyes.

“G-got it…”

Her movements, now slow and calculated, made you visibly start to sweat. With your tail already flagged, Rainbow bend her head down and took a deep sniff, making her nostrils flare and her cock become ridged.

“Are you ready Anon?”

Your clit winking was the answer she needed, nibbling at the nerve-packed nub. No blowjob you ever received, both from your wife or Rainbow, could compare to the pure ecstasy firing from your clit as the pegasus triggered your first orgasm.

“It took longer than ten seconds, but not bad for a first timer. Considering how drenched your folds already are, I’m going to skip using my tongue and move on straight to the main event.”

Considering you were a full-grown mare, it was difficult to think of how Rainbow was going to mount you since you were the same height as her. Your puzzlement didn't last long, with Rainbow flapping her wings to hover behind you. The cool downdraft caused by the motion of her wings caused you to shudder, and for your clit to emerge from its hood once more.

“Like that don'tcha? I've seen Soarin mount Spits after shows to know to do this, so please don't try and resist. Let me lead, and you have my word that I will go slow. I must warn you, when I pop your hymen it is going to hurt like Tartarus, but after the pain wears off the pleasure is worth it.”

From the advancement of air on your barrel, you knew that she was inching closer. Feeling her tip touch your folds sent a rush of fire through your body, making your legs quiver as you soaked her rod in anticipation. The feeling of it entering you made you feel reborn, your body running on autopilot and trying to draw her in quicker.

That is until she hit your barrier.

You both flinch, Rainbow freezing n uncertainty and worry as she slowly grinding her tip along your outermost lips. Your walls wanted the cherry popped, your womb wanted your cherry popped, and rebelling against the last of your humanity cemented your choice. In a move that caught Rainbow and Twilight off guard, you bucked back as Rainbow thrust forward, making you yelp in pain and Rainbow to perch on your back without removing her cock.

“What the hay Anon?! I could have hurt you!”

Through the diminishing pain, you forced a genuine smile.

“Quick like a bandage, now rut me into a puddle!”

Flapping her wings again, Rainbow got back into position and gently rocked her hips, slowly pushing her way deeper into your depths. Your walls responded in turn, flexing and milking Rainbow to try and coax its prize out of it. Now that you were experiencing sex from the other side of the gender line, you found it far more pleasurable to be on the receiving end.

A poke at your mouth briefly drew your attention from the treatment your tunnel was receiving, and when your eyes focused Twilight’s member was right in front of your muzzle. The tantalizing purple rod throbbed with every exhale you took, your hot breath making Twilight's body shudder as she started to take notes.

“This certainly feels different than with my vagina, for it feels that my tip is like a water hose with pressure back up. I also notice it feels like my testes are being stirred, similar to how one washes garments in boiling water. Anon, I know you never did a blowjob before, but a tip I learned from a friend was for you to relax your throat.”

Parting your jaws, Twilight slipped her member into your mouth. The human part of your conscience, reduced to living in a closet in your mind, beat at the walls of its confines. He was appalled at what you were doing, begging and pleading for you to stop and listen to reason.

Buck him, that was no longer you.

Imagining Twilight's cock to be a grape popsicle, you started bobbing your head in sync with Rainbow's thrusts, using your tongue for added effect as you licked the length. The alicorn's moans let you know you were going a good job, and the faint saltiness of the cock from her earlier orgasm had lingered and made you want to suck harder. You now had two goals, and judging by the way both cocks felt you were close to achieving both.

It became a bit of a race to see who would climax first. Twilight and Rainbow, for their part, started ramping up the pace of their thrusts once you saw you were showing no signs of pain and not wearing down. Being turned into an Earth Pony was your key, knowing your marefriend had a tightly timed hair trigger and Earth Ponies were built for endurance rather than pegasi speed. To you, the hard part was figuring out how to outlast the Princess of Friendship who was using your mouth as her personal fleshlight.

As you expected, Rainbow was the first to give in. With a strong flap of her wings, she hilted and fired her seed into your depths. Her sperm made quick work dousing the fire in your belly, and after her fourth shot you felt her start to go soft as she pulled out and slumped to the floor.

“That… was… AWESOME!!! I never felt a climax like that before, and I have had enough of them to know how much different it felt. The only complaint I have is that I'm already exhausted, no wonder Anon was always tired after the first few rounds. Other than that, and the fact it would hurt my aerodynamics, I definitely wouldn't mind keeping this thing.”

Twilight deadpanned, managing to keep in a moan as you continued to service her.

“Let’s see. You have a cock, balls, and teats between your legs, but due to placement they are balanced on your equilibrium point. Yes, one testicle is slightly smaller than the other, but the same thing is true about your wings. The only thing you would have to do is learn how to adjust your maneuvering with the new weight, but how you are that wouldn't be an issue for long. If you are dead set on having it, I could work on a potion that would temporarily give you one.”

Rainbow, whose cock and balls were in the process of receding, lept over you and tackled Twilight with a hug, forcing her cock out of your mouth as she painted your face white. With a cocky grin, you proceeded to start licking yourself clean as Twilight furrowed her brow.

“You could have at least let me finish off in Anon's mouth first before you did that. Although, guess I really can't be mad at you for doing that since you let your marefriend give me a blow job. Discord can take his time returning me to normal, for I plan on getting a lot of practice in with experiments since I secretly used a spell that guaranteed that Anon would get pregnant.”

A brief flare of anger pulsed in you at the fact Twilight had manipulated the deal so she would win, but it was replaced with happiness that she had ensured you were going to have a foal. Rainbow, however, was absolutely furious. Knocking Twilight onto her back, Rainbow pinned her friend down by placing her forehooves on Twilight's wings and applying pressure.

“That is messed up on so many levels Egg Head. Not only did you manipulate a deal made in desperation for your own purposes, but you also betrayed my trust in you. The Element of Loyalty was bonded to me, and I still hold that in high regard. As far as I see it, the deal is off.”

Turning to leave, Rainbow spread her wings and got ready to take off out the window. Before she could, you tugged on her tail and forced her to look at you.

“I know you’re mad, but please don't hold it against her. The experiments are going to be foal safe anyway, so there is not a lot of things she can do outside of ultrasounds and magic scans to see what species it is going to be and to monitor its development. Think of the positives, look what it did for me… for us.”

Taking one of her hooves, you sat down and gently put it on your stomach. The moment you did, you could see the storm clouds dissipate in her eyes and the gentle magenta seas return. In that moment, the tough mare act Rainbow put on for others and in public went away, replaced by the kind and considerate mare that you privately knew she actually was. Tears formed and her hoof started to quiver, before finally using her wings to pull you into a hug.

“We're going to be parents. Oh man, I sure hope Spits and Soarin can somehow push the paperwork through for me to have paternity leave. I can only imagine the slack the other Bolts are going to give me, but dammit I got a family I need to see about now and that is going to be my top priority going forward.”

You didn't see that coming, and judging by Twilight's slack jaw she wasn't either. She had a look of pure determination in her eyes, but underneath it you saw something that your wife had given you plenty a long night.

“Rainbow, are you disappointed that I'm the one carrying our foal?”

At first, all she did was shuffle a hoof, but soon after she took a deep sigh.

“I am Anon. I know this may sound cheesy and I’m not the best mare to express mushiness or feelings, but I had hoped that eventually our relationship would have gone… further than we were at. Don't get me wrong, the sex is great, but I wanted something more Anon because I kept wondering how long it was going to take for you to ask me to be your mare for life. With Luna as my witness, she saw my dreams, so she could tell you how many times I dreamed of our wedding; with my dad walking me down the aisle to you waiting at the altar, my dress fitted so it minimized the look of my baby bump. Now, it feels like all that got taken away from me, all because that bucker thought turning you into a mare in heat would bring a cheap chuckle. Let's see how much he can laugh once I shatter his jaw with a Rainboom Punch.”

Unaware to you, in Chaosville, both Discord and Eris gulped at Rainbow's threat.

You, however, felt your heart soar like Rainbow in flight. Taking a hoof and bringing it under Rainbow's chin, you lightly kissed her on the muzzle as you smiled at her confession.

“Rainbow, I may be a mare now, but I am still attracted to you. If I wasn't, I would have had Twilight take me as soon as the mist cleared and I saw her cock. She didn't want to betray you as a friend, and I didn't want to betray you as a lover, so she went and brought you here. Besides, I may be carrying your foal now, but that doesn't mean a few years from now after I finish waning that I can't do the same to you with that potion Twilight is going to make. I love you Rainbow, and I will be honored to be your wife. If anything, it was me that got cheated because of having to give up my wife and kids, but I have gained a new lease on life and going to have a family again. You came to me when I was an outcast, helping me settle in, and if I was a pegasus you would be the wind beneath my wings.”

Rainbow's breath hitched, her eyes shining with moisture from the tears that threatened to roll down her cheeks.

“Well Anon, you are my guiding winds, the winds that steer me forward. I promise, on my Element, that I will provide everything I can for you. If you are sick, I will nurse you. If you are tired from watching our foal, I will take over so you can rest. Nothing will harm you or our foal, and if anything tries I will show no mercy.”

You gave her another soft kiss.

“As your wife, I promise to do the same. I will be the best mother I can be, and the best voice of support for you that I can physically muster. Whether we are sick, healthy, rich, or poor, as long as I'm with you I'm whole.”

Rainbow kissed you back.

“And you make me whole… my solid footing when I can't fly, but study to make sure I don't fall.”

Twilight cleared her throat, placing a hand on both you and Rainbow.

“As the Princess of Friendship, by the powers vested in me by Princesses Celestia and Luna, I now pronounce you mare and wife. You two may kiss the bride.”

Rainbow leaned in, but as much as you wanted to, you didn't immediately return the kiss. She looked at you confused as you kept a hoof to her muzzle, a gleam forming as you cleared your throat to speak in your most sensual tone.

“Rainbow, you've been gone for long enough, you better kiss me like you missed me.”

Dropping your hoof back to the floor, she went for her prize. Time seemed to stop as her lips touched yours, nothing else mattered because in this magical moment your new life was cemented. You would never forget the good times you had with your human family, but now all that mattered was the beautiful mare in front of you and the life in your womb.

“You know Anon, I think the fun part is going to be how we’re going to convince Pinks not to throw a big party or blow this up more than it has any right to be. With my status, I wouldn't be surprised if she tried to convince the princesses to have it in the grand hall. She has both a wedding reception and a foal shower to plan for, so don't be surprised if she bombards us with questions.”

With a chip on her shoulder from Destiny's teasing, Fate was on a roll. She was the puppeteer, the Director, the Stringweaver. With the finesse of a cat, she smiled from afar as the energetic mare made her entrance into the library. You had a feeling she was behind it, but you never will be able to prove it.

“Oh my goodness! About time Dashie settled down with a special somepony, but to be a parent?! I got a lot of work to do if I want to make this my super duper bestie best party ever. There's the permission request to give to Princess Celestia, invitations, color palettes… Do you want the carpet I'm going to order match the drapes or can I go wild with it?”

Rainbow whispered an ‘I told you so’ in your ear as you blushed at the double entendre. A faint, sweet scent caught your nose, making your mouth water at how much it smelled like cotton candy. You kept sniffing, moving around the room trying to find the source, only to discover the source when you put your nose near Pinkie's tight gumdrop.

How she looked so tight was a mystery you didn't have time for, but you suspected licorice was somehow involved.

“Uhh, Pinkie, did you put cotton candy inside of you again? I figured after the incident with the cannoli roller, you would have learned your lesson.”

Out the corner of your eye, you saw both Twilight and Rainbow flinch. Your breath had unintentionally turned Pinkie on, her engorged clit begging to be sucked on as she started to leak from her folds.

You were bombarded with the cotton candy scent, putting two and two together.

“Pinkie, were you watching our make-out session? Why in the world were you being a voyeur?!”

She shuffled, tucking her tail over her labia and between her legs before laying on it like a bean bag chair.

“Wellllllllll… You see...”

You are Pinkie Pie.

After a longer than expected trip through the perilous Hayseed Swamp, you were just happy to be home. Making the most of your newfound free time, you decided to spend some time with your secret super best friend Wade. He got you some sugar that turned you into your secret alter-ego Filly Second, fought a few baddies, and left him with his crime-fighting group to regenerate since his head got blown off again. Upon arrival back in Ponyville, you had made a delivery of cakes to your friend Shooting Star since he was having a family reunion, and now with nothing else to do you were pronking towards the Castle of Friendship to check up on Anon.

Bouncing through the crystal halls with a song in your heart, you slowed to a stop at the sound of moaning coming from the library.

Guess Twilight got a new order of Playcolts, something only you knew was her guilty pleasure. That mare sure did love her books!

You found the door slightly ajar, which you found odd. If Twilight was hoof deep in a Playcolt, she normally took extra steps to make sure she didn't get caught, but then again, she hadn't planned on you popping out her lavender plant to give her a congratulatory cake on five years of being a princess.

Boy, that was an awkward day, especially since you both had the same type of interests and it turned into a food porn session with the cake.

Peeking inside the door, you felt your walls moisten. Rainbow had a cock, Twilight was a human/pony hybrid, and they were spitroasting an Earth Pony mare. The fact your ‘new arrival, new friend’ radar didn't go off meant the mare was someone you knew, and since you had everypony accounted for that left only one option.

”Why is Anon a mare?... But wow, this is so hot to watch.”

You knew what you were doing was wrong, but it was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. Leaning against the wall, you reached a hoof under your tail and started to stroke. It was these kinds of activities that made you miss your hands, after all you were Human Pinkie on vacation, but you had made enough trips to Equestria that you had learned to make do.

Slipping the edge of your hoof in your folds as far as it would go, you began to stroke. Sunset with a strap-on, or even better a magical cock, placed your mind where you felt safest. You pictured yourself facedown on the bed, with your girlfriend taking you doggy style, as you splattered your hoof and the floor in your sweet smelling juices.

That was going to be fun to clean up, but that was for later.

Focusing back on the mares in the room, your heart fluttered as you heard the conversation. Anon being pregnant and Rainbow getting married was a very rare opportunity to combine two parties into one, something that made you tremor with anticipation. As gifts, games, and food ideas ran through your head, you felt that it was time to make your presence known.

“Well, now you are all caught up!”

All three mares stared at you in disbelief, but for a reason that was Pinkie Promised into secrecy, Twilight's cheeks turned the same color as your coat.

“So, you are Sunset's girlfriend? Why on Equus and Earth do you two keep switching?”

Wow, about time either Twi had asked that.

“We do it for several reasons Twilight, and before you ask, Sunny knows about it. We both get bored from time to time and need a vacation, and this is our way of doing it. Do you have any idea how hard it is for her to plan so many parties and stay on schedule? She gets burn out, so when she feels an episode coming on we switch places, that way she can recover and I still make all her commitments.”

Twilight's face went blank.

“I suppose that makes a lot of sense, and answers a lot of questions. Can you please keep this secret while you are here? I don't think that they are ready to announce it just yet, I will let you know when to start preparing everything by sending you a messege via Sunset's journal.”

Those terms were reasonable, and you really hated to hurt your mirror friends just as much as you hated to hurt yours back home.

“Okie Dokie Loki! I got to go take care of a few things before I go back home, so your secret is safe with me. Oh, by the way, Sunny's next party is Saturday night at 8. If there is any possible way you can make yourself look like that, do it, and teach her the cock growing spell too.”

Bouncing out the room, stopping only to absorb your cum back into your tail, you heard Twilight faint in the room behind you as you galloped down the hall. Your choice of a wedding gift was determined, and it was one that was feasible with a bit of tinkering.

Every Pinkie that's a Pinkie, knows every Pinkie Pie.

And yes, dear reader, you are hereby Pinkie challenged to say it five times fast to the “Mamma Mia” part of Bohemian Rhapsody.

With that being said, you knew the basic information of every Pinkie in the multiverse thanks to your great-great-great-great grandpa Whoo Pie beating Discord in a game of tiddlywinks. With the game won, he kept his soul and won the rights that should any Pie be an Element Bearer, they would have the assess to the infinite timelines that existed.

Guess who was the lucky mare, and sometimes you think Harmony did it on purpose.

After Anon's arrival and hearing all that he had to give up, it became your mission to search across the four dimensions to locate the Pinkie Pie there. Eventually, you found her. Her name was Paula Parkers, a descendant of Bohemian Gypsies that had come to America for a better life, and she still practiced the arts. You had managed to link a mirror in her house to one of her own, and discovered something amazing, Paula was Anon's sister-in-law. You had been meaning to talk to her again, but between school finals and saving Equestria there hadn't been much time.

You knew there were going to be drastic consequences if your plan succeeded, but that was for future you to worry about. Taking off full speed towards Everfree Forest, you made it your goal to get Zecora to help.

“All I need is a potion or two, then I can make my family's witches’ brew!”

Author's Note

Do you accept the challenge Pinkie throwed down for you?

Who wants a sequel?

Also, this is the longest chapter I ever wrote (yay!), and I honestly can't believe I pull this off. With my editor Penalt in the process of moving, (safe travels good friend!) I took it upon myself to soldier on and defeat this behemoth.

Thanks to everyone who took the time to give the doc a glance and give me edits/suggestions, they are always appreciated. If you have the Discord app, my tag is Willow#7167 if you want to shoot me a DM (but I do view PMs here on FiMfic when I have them).

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