The patron of Want.

by Totally Emo

Rating: teen
Tags: Scootaloo, Random, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Crossover, Main 6, Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 1969

A immortal being without a purpose in life, adopts scootaloo.

A being of power that losses his purpose and wanders the realms of existence. He finds new purpose in a filly named scootaloo who he finds homeless. He adopts her...Unfortunately his philosophy on life conflicts with the local ponies of Ponyville sense of decency and not to mention he not really from Equeastria.

Published 2011-12-12 14:11:47 UTC
Last updated 2011-12-13 02:16:42 UTC

Loss of purpose? Adopt a pony! (Edited version)

I hate being a god… Now don't get me wrong, the perks at first were great: the sheer power to create or destroy was addictive and the respect I got was a massive boost to my self-esteem. Unfortunately, like all jobs that seem great at first I soon became aware of the cons of being a god:

I had a boss. That's right. Being a god doesn't exempt you from the one of the basic facts of life: Everyone has a boss. I can't even say I met the guy but the rumor is that he is the original GOD - the creator of virtually everything. Apparently he divided up his duties and created beings like me to handle various affairs to lighten his work load. Unfortunately that just rumors, basic fact is though I take orders from something that can wipe my essence from the face of the universe so bad it was like I never existed.

The job is your life. I used to have some free time but the boss decreed to create more and more and more until the fucking universe became a multiverse were alternate realities became so numerous that only the boss knows how much stuff he created. I can't even remember the last vacation I took… Hell I cant remember if I took a vacation at all.

The job starts to define who you are. I knew the god that was built for war, he used to be a nice guy with a sense of humor. He used to yell "head shot!" randomly and even created a heaven for warriors to do battle till the end of time just so he can see the happiness on some psychos face when they find out that they can live forever doing what they love. Now he's a jackass who hates, and by hates I mean HATES, he only feels rage… Last time I saw him he was destroying that heaven he created stating "In war the dead are not free." He enslaved the souls of the residents of that heaven and turned them into monsters that follows his orders.

I am a god of... well... Want… or Lust, now don't go thinking I'm pervert or anything! I guess you can describe me as the Ambition to become president, or the jealousy you feel when you look at that new Corvette in your neighbors driveway, the Lust when a husband looks at someone other than his wife or the need to eat that juicy medium rare double bacon cheeseburger when your on a diet. I was created for this purpose when humanity was created so I could push them up the evolutionary food chain. If I didn't do it who would? The first human would just have been content to hide and survive in the darkness until I made them experience the comfort of fire and the safety from the weather outside. Could the first humans take all that punishment from such a primal world? Yes they could, but they would just take the punishment and not strive to change any of it, I changed that and gave them the balls to tell nature to fuck her self and make the world theirs.

Humanity since then became my job and my passion. I promoted the idea of the species in not accepting "Just surviving" line of thinking. Tired of genetic diseases? I make the cure happen. Tired of those politicians holding you down? I create civil wars. Need the forests and jungles destroyed to make room for a growing population along with the need for food increasing? I say fuck nature and deforest areas and create clones of cows, sheep, and plants to provide a surplus of space and food for humanity to grow. Planet becoming inhabitable? Move to a new planet and fuck over mother nature there.

First time humanity moved to a new planet Mother nature was prepared for me. Humanity encountered a race of big blue humanoids called the Na'vi, and when we started mining and shit they got prissy for hurting "Eywa". So it was my race against mother nature's big blue monkeys, and I admit they had the home field advantage and the advantage of evolving to being able to survive the planets hostile surface. But they haven't had enough motivation to take control of nature and break nature's rules. Humanity wiped out the Na'vi through the use of nuclear bombs, chemical weapons, and good old fashioned bullets. Humanity fucked up the planet so bad that it became uninhabitable. So they mined the fuck out of it and moved on too another planet.

Mother nature is still pissed at me because of that... Like I give two shits about what she thinks.

Unfortunately Mother nature had a long memory and a even bigger ego - she got sick of my constant abuse of her "sphere" of influence so she challenged me to one on one combat. I accepted and our battle began, it was… Glorious. Suns exploding, wiping out entire star systems, black holes appearing to block anything we could throw at each other. That was just the opening blow to test out each others power. We started attacking each other for real, not at each other physically, but through our charges. The ones who we actually created for. If our purpose is destroyed we lose the will to live… I can't fully explain the feeling but imagine a puppy - yah a puppy with cute little eyes and soft fur: now imagine it getting its head cut off.

Sad, right? But you really never were attached to that puppy so you will eventually get over it.

Now imagine that same puppy alive and well that you took care of. You fed it, played with it, and eventually raising it to be a big strapping dog. Through all time you helped it learn new tricks, taught it not to pee in the house and had even started thinking of it as a family member. Now imaging its head being cut off.

That was the pain I felt when Mother Nature destroyed humanity, she took them out with a series of black hole popping up in the middle of the home fleet… After that I lost track of time… Detached from everything. Even Mother nature taunts and jeers about my loss. I wander the realms of existence hoping to forget, but just like that puppy, you just can't forget something like that. I would've continue on like that till the end of time if I had not come upon a quaint little planet named Equeastria... And on that planet I found a new purpose, and that purpose was named Scootaloo.

I felt the planet brimming with contentment. Every need provided and sustained by two entities that felt unfamiliar to me. I would've turned away if I hadn't sensed a tiny blimp of…"Want".

"Something must be down there that just might need me," I thought with a bit of hope that I might find something to give me purpose; or at least allow me to forget my troubles. I descended through the atmosphere toward the blimp. It was in a village that was going through a serious rainstorm, I appeared in the middle of what looked like the town square and I looked around… It had a medieval look about it and no one was around. The locals must have went inside their homes.

Except one.

I followed the "Want" until I came upon a little orange filly with wings on the ground in an alleyway, soaking wet under a overhanging roof. It didn't see me since I was hiding my entire being from the entities of this world who might get territorial over my trespassing.

"One of Mother natures failed creations?" I wondered. I felt a bit disappointed in my find since I had no need to take care of an animal. I was about to leave until I heard it speak in a young girls voice.

"Happy birthday to me, Happy birthday to me, Happy birthday dear Scootaloo," She ended with a sad sniffle. After that she burst into tears. I decided to let mother nature run its course for once and turned around to let the obvious reject die, when then I felt her "Want" begin to grow.

"I just want a family!" She snarled out between sobs. I stopped in my tracks looking at her thinking about what she said… I was intrigued at the possibility that maybe I can steal one away one of Mother nature's subjects, having one's creation stolen away by a rival god is really insulting, and I was in the mood for some petty revenge.

"I can give you a family..." I spoke inside her head. She jumped at the sound of my voice in her head. "I can give you that and more."

"Who are you?" She said out loud looking left and right in search of me. "Where are you?"

"I'm a…man, who can take care of you. And where I am is right in front of you." I didn't reveal myself, but I will if she accepts my offer.

"I don't see you," she said with a another round of find the invisible man, "and what's a man?'

"Dose it matter what I am? I can get you out of the rain and into a warm house in one hour if you accept my offer."

"I don't know who you are and plus I can't even see you,"

"You will see me and know me if you accept my offer, all you need to say is yes and I will appear." She looked like she was thinking about it and it seemed childish desperation was winning out for someone to finally take care of her. To finally have a home.

"Yes," She said in a pleading whisper.

"Yes what?" I needed too make sure that she was willing to accept my offer.

"Please mister take me home!" Her eyes where looking every where for me to appear, and her eyes started to grow even more desperate when she couldn't find me.

"As you wish." I appeared right in front off her in my usual psychical form, A cloaked figure in black robes with two glowing white eyes shining out through the shadows of the hood. Weirdly enough she didn't flinch from my appearance nor look like she wanted to run away. She just looked up at me with a open mouth. I smiled, and knelt down were lightly tapped her chin with my right hand, and when I touched her I willed the water away from her coat so she would be dry. She closed her mouth in surprise.

"What are you?" She asked with wonder in her voice.

"I'm you father... If you want one that is." Some how her face managed to make an expression that showed mixed excitement and fear and longing into one. Then she fainted, and I caught her before she could hit the ground and cradled her like a baby.

"Too much in one day for you, kid? I said to her, "Ahh well… We can finish this in the morning"

That night a new house with two new occupants appeared at the edge of town, one of them was sleeping for the first time in two years in a warm bed, were the other was contently watching it's new ward. In another place in city called Canderlot, a goddess as planning on visiting the town to see her prized student.

And in the country of America a fellow Brony is wondering if he should continue this story...
Were his editor is vigorously shaking the Spelling and Grammar stick at him.