Chapters Return the Night, or no Deposit
The report landed on Fit’s desk just like the others before it. He sighed deeply and lowered his head to his hooves as the clerk walked away to distribute the other files she carried.
“Another one?” Haven asked, sliding across the aisle in her rolling chair.
“Yeah,” Fit muttered. He picked up the file with his magic and opened it. It was addressed to Detectives Cross Fit and Safe Haven, and contained the sparest details of the latest incident in a series of graffiti appearing all over Manehattan.
Delinquents will be delinquents, but it was cause for concern when a series of vaguely threatening political messages were being spray painted everywhere. Worse, the culprits were slipperier than greased griffons.
“Whatcha got there?” asked a voice.
Fit slapped the folder closed. Haven threw up a wing to cover it. Both of them looked up to the stallion standing on the other side of the desk.
Nosey News was perhaps the most well-named pony in all of Manehattan. Either that or it was a penname he picked himself. He wrote a crime column for the newspaper and had a habit of walking the edge of the law himself in pursuit of a story.
“It wouldn’t happen to be anything more on these mysterious anti-Luna activists, would it?” Nosey asked.
“No comment,” said Fit.
The messages being sprayed around town took several different formats, but were generally disdainful of Princess Luna. It was a notable story, and only getting bigger the longer the police failed to apprehend those responsible.
Nosey grinned as if he were delighted. He should be, his column was practically writing itself these days. “Well, let me know if you’d like to issue a statement. I’ll make sure to give you the credit.”
“What are you even doing here?” Haven asked. “Who let you in the building?”
“Ah, got to protect my sources.”
“Well, your sources know they’re breaking the rules,” said Haven. “And so are you. Out.”
Nosey nodded, seemingly unperturbed. He turned around and left the office.
“What are we going to do?” Haven asked quietly, when Nosey was gone. “There haven’t been any new leads for weeks.”
That was true. There had been precious little in the way of clues, and they hadn’t been lucky enough to catch anypony in the act. Fit had taken on the unsolvable case to prove himself, but so far, he hadn’t proved much of anything. He thought his drive, the experience from his time as a Lunar Guard, and talent could carry him. It hadn’t. He could feel his career plateauing. It had made him a little desperate.
After a moment, Fit said, “Last week, I sent a letter to my old commander. She had a mind for convoluted plots and I thought she might be able to help.”
“You can’t discuss case details with an outsider,” Haven protested. “I don’t know how you did it when you were in the Guard, but you know Manhattan PD has rules against that.”
“I know,” said Fit. “But I trust her to be discreet, and we could always says she was a consultant or something.” He was aware that he was justifying it to himself as much as Haven.
She grumbled, but asked, “So what did your old boss say?”
“She hasn’t yet. It’s only been a few days, so she’s probably just gotten my letter. We could get a reply back any time.”
“Where does she live?”
“Wash Margin.” Seeing Haven’s confused look, Fit added, “It’s a small island off the coast of Horseshoe Bay. At least I think she still lives there. That’s where her PO box is. That one address is the only information I have about her anymore. She’s always been hard to find.”
Fit sighed and got up from his chair. It was only early afternoon, and he was wishing he was somewhere else. The gym, maybe. He stretched, drawing a look from one of the female detectives sitting across the room. She blushed and pretended not to stare. He hadn’t even been flexing.
“I started off thinking this case could make us superstars if we solved it,” said Haven. “Now I’m wondering if it’s going to get us fired. Why couldn’t they have given it to somepony else?”
Fit had wanted it, asked for it. He felt mildly guilty that Haven seemed to have picked up some of his disquiet. She ran a hoof through her short mane. It wasn’t cut that way because she was butch - though she was - it was because long manes could get caught in things, and Safe Haven was all about mitigating risk. She was even colored like a traffic cone.
“What are you two still doing here?” demanded a voice.
Fit and Haven turned to find themselves staring at the pudgy, red face of Tracy Sketchy, Chief of Police. He didn’t really have another attitude besides constant disgruntlement. He also possessed a near-supernatural ability to know what his officers were up to, which seemed to include what files had landed on their desks only minutes earlier.
“We were just about to go have a look at the scene, boss,” said Fit.
“Turn your collar down,” the Chief ordered.
Fit adjusted his polo shirt. For whatever reason, his collar had a tendency to pop itself. He would simply go without a shirt, but his frosted mane and tanned coat needed a splash of color.
Veering back on topic, Chief Sketchy said, “Go see what it’s about this time. Bring me a drawing.”
In his office, there were already a dozen or more drawings of the graffiti appearing around Manehattan. Not to mention dozens more related to other crimes. Not to mention drawings Tracy Sketchy had made himself.
“Got it, boss,” said Fit, picking up his notepad and pencil. He and Haven headed for the door before the Chief could insert any more pains into their life.
The Manehattan Police Headquarters building was a piece of brutalist architecture, and what it lacked in charm it made up for it in cold government chic. Fit and Haven came out the front door and turned down the sidewalk. Fit put on a pair of white-framed sunglasses.
It would be a long walk to the address listed in the file, but not so long as to require a ride. Either way, they had to go. The file on this incident only contained what information had been reported by the pony who had called it in. Fit and Haven would be the first police to actually investigate.
“What do you bet it’s going to be this time?” Haven asked. “A picture of the sun? A meandering history lesson? Gibberish?”
“What are we betting? Lunch?”
“If you’re game.”
Fit nodded. “All right. I’ll say indecipherable gibberish. That’s been the most common.”
“I’ll say it’ll be another splash of Princess Celestia’s cutie mark. It’s been awhile since we’ve seen one of those.”
Fit frowned. Safe Haven was not known for risky bets.
The two of them showed up at the address. It was a vertical apartment building. Near the back, out of sight of the sidewalk, a stylized sun had been spray painted on the bricks. Haven had the good graces not to gloat. She flew up to take a closer look. Fit was taller, and could rear as high as the painting.
The two of them began processing the available evidence.
There wasn’t any. That was fast.
Fit groaned inwardly. He desperately wanted to be rid of this case. The feeling of helplessness was getting to him.
They already knew it was useless to try and match the paint to anything. The graffiti was always painted in common spray paint sold in every hardware store in Equestria. The only thing left to do would be to interview any nearby ponies to see if they knew anything. None of them ever knew anything, so Fit and Haven would likely soon be back to square one with nothing to show.
Still, procedure was procedure. There was a slim, nonzero, chance that one of these days somepony might say something useful.
That day was not today, however. All of the ponies who answered their doors in the building hadn’t seen who had painted the graffiti, nor had any idea who it might be.
The feeling from earlier returned. Fit had taken the case to show the department he was a rising star. He didn’t enjoy feeling as if he was treading water. The case that hung around him like an unpleasant, unwanted smell. He was concerned that it was starting to rub off on him.
Fit and Haven stopped at a café on the way back to the office. Haven may have won lunch, but she wasn’t picky. They sat at the counter on the tall stools. While waiting for their food, Fit remembered to make a quick sketch of the latest graffiti.
“Can I borrow a pen?” he said.
“Sure, take my spare.” Haven had a spare everything, it seemed. She was all about being prepared.
“So how much longer do you think we have before the case - or we - get reassigned?” Haven asked, looking morosely at the sandwich the waitress put in front of her.
Fit’s mouth was already full, but he decided the question was probably rhetorical. Even if it wasn’t, he didn’t want to think about the answer. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw somepony slide onto the stool beside him.
“How’s it going?” asked a voice.
Fit dropped his sandwich and managed to gasp through a full mouth. “Ma’am! What are you doing here?”
The mare who had sat down beside him wore the appearance of a Lunar Guard, the batlike image generated by an enchanted tail band issued to guardsponies. She had on a hooded sweatshirt that read I Las Pegasus on the front in faded letters and a pair of sunglasses riding high on her forehead. There was no purple-enameled armor or anything else besides her bat pony look to suggest she was a guard.
She grinned, all fang. “Cross Fit, my boy, I can’t express how glad I am to have received your letter and become involved in a case so interesting.”
Haven leaned around Fit. “Who’s this?”
“This is Cracked Mirror, my old Lieutenant,” Fit introduced.
Haven cast an appraising look at her hip, where sure enough there resided the image of a cracked mirror. “Fit said he consulted you, but I don’t think either of us were expecting you to come all this way.”
“How could I not?” said Mirror, still beaming with enthusiasm. “This is clearly the work of a cult.”
Several ponies within earshot turned to look.
Haven gave Fit a skeptical glance.
“I think she can help,” Fit said, though he wasn’t sure exactly who he was trying to convince.
Mirror grinned. “And it might even be you I help.”
Return the Night, or no Deposit
Once they had finished lunch, Fit said, “Since we’re here, we should show you the latest crime scene.”
“I’ve been following it with great interest in the newspapers,” said Mirror. She shrugged. “And I was following you earlier today, so I’ve seen it.”
“You can’t just follow police!” Haven protested. “And anyway, I think I would have noticed!”
Knowing Mirror’s capabilities as he did, Fit doubted that, but said, “Well, that saves some time. Let’s get back to the station and review the evidence file”
Haven watched Mirror darkly all the way there. Mirror kept looking around like a tourist as they walked through Manehattan. Fit still couldn’t believe she had shown up in the city instead of just answering his letter. He didn’t know how she had found him. Though with Mirror, there was very little that surprised him anymore after serving as her second-in-command Sergeant for a couple of years.
They paused at a corner, waiting for the traffic to clear before crossing the street. Mirror took out a spool of stiff white cord, bit a piece off, and then set the end of it on fire with a gold lighter.
Haven stared at her. “Is that lamp wick?”
Mirror offered the spool to her and said through her teeth, “Want some?” She had the non-burning end of the wick in her mouth. “You’ll get better results if you keep some kind of hydrocarbon in your cheek to fuel it. It can go for hours if you do it right.”
Haven wrinkled her nose. “Smoking kills. Even if you aren’t smoking cigarettes.”
Mirror shrugged. “Suit yourself. Fit?”
“No, thank you, ma’am.” He glanced at the wick. “Looks like you’ve upgraded.”
Haven shot him a confused look. Fit thought about explaining how Mirror usually smoked regular string, but decided that would produce even more questions.
Surprised as he was about her traveling to Manehattan to answer his letter, he was optimistic. This was the first significant development in the case since he’d been assigned to it. Granted, not one that brought him a step closer to actually solving the case. Not yet, anyway.
They crossed the street and walked to the next block. Just outside the police station, Mirror ground out the remains of her smoke and dropped it in a trash can. She followed them into the building.
If she had drawn stares out on the sidewalk, even more ponies looked at her now. Cops were territorial, and a Lunar Guard - a fed - walking in had them on edge. Not to mention the curiosity that said bat pony was otherwise out of uniform.
Fit hurried to Chief Sketchy’s office to drop off the picture of the crime scene, hoping to head him off before he came looking for it. The Chief wasn’t in, so Fit left the drawing on his desk.
Back at his own desk, Mirror was flipping through the case files while Haven gave her a disapproving look.
Mirror glanced up as Fit approached, continuing to flip through the paperwork despite not looking at it. “So have you investigated any cults?”
“Not yet,” Fit replied. There wasn’t any evidence he could think of that implied there might be a cult involved.
Mirror nodded. “Any leads?”
“Not many,” Haven replied.
“Suspects?”
“No.”
Mirror nodded. “Sounds easy.” There wasn’t a trace of sarcasm in her voice.
Haven shook her head. “I’m sorry, but what have you done that was harder than solving a case with no evidence?”
Mirror shrugged. “Not many things. Maybe writing that screenplay Springtime for Nightmare Moon. But just because I’ve never done this before doesn’t imply that it won’t have any any higher difficulty level than easy. Of course, with no historical precedent, I don’t have a scale to judge easy-to-hard.”
Haven looked at Fit, who maintained an impassive expression that he hoped portrayed his confidence in Mirror, if not actually agreement with her methods.
Another detective, Bulldog, came over. His attitude aside, he did look a lot like his namesake, bowlegged and short, with a face akin to a train wreck.
“Who’s this?” he demanded.
“This is a consultant we brought in for the graffiti case,” said Fit.
“How’s it going? Cracked Mirror.” She grinned broadly and shook his hoof.
“What’s with your getup?” he said, gesturing at her.
“Hmm?”
“Why are you a bat pony?”
“Why does your face look like a train wreck?” Mirror responded.
That was exactly how Fit had mentally described Bulldog. Mirror had an uncanny ability to do that. Fit didn’t think she was a mind reader. He knew that her freewheeling nature concealed one of the sharpest observers he’d ever met, and she probably just knew Fit well enough to know what he was thinking.
Bulldog fumbled before snapping back, “I asked you first!”
“I asked you rhetorically.”
Bulldog’s jowls opened but no sound came out. He shook his head and spun around. “Wait ‘till the boss gets a load of this.” He stalked away.
Fit could only imagine how Chief Sketchy would respond. He didn’t have long to wait to find out, though.
“You call this a drawing of a crime scene?” Sketchy demanded, coming over with the paper Fit had left on his desk.
“Oh! Can I see?” asked Mirror.
Fit tried to soothe things before they got out of control, because nothing good could come from his hard-nosed Chief meeting his quirky case advisor. “Boss, this is a consultant we brought in to help with the case. She’s very experienced.”
Sketchy eyed her. “What kind of experience?”
“I was a Lunar Guard station commander for a couple of years.”
It had been more than just a couple, though Fit didn’t know exactly how long she’d been in the service. Longer than him.
“We don’t have the budget for a consultant,” Sketchy said.
“Oh no, this is for free.”
That surprised Fit as much as anypony else.
“It’s personal,” Mirror added.
That, too.
“It sounds like a conflict of interest,” said Sketchy.
“Well you see, if I’m not on the payroll, then how can I be said to be acting in the interests of the police? And therefore, the results I get will be technically from an impartial third party.”
“You said it was personal,” Sketchy shot back. “How can you be impartial?”
“I’m not currently involved in the legal system, so if I’m not part of the prosecution or defense, then in the eyes of the court, I’m not included at all. I’ve been involved in a lot of cases of perversions of justice and could argue technicalities, but we don’t have that kind of time.”
Sketchy shifted his posture, as if taking a stance for a boxing match. “Humor me.”
“What’s the Mare in the Moon’s favorite music?” Mirror grinned.
Sketchy’s face went blank. “What are you talking about?”
“You said to humor you.”
Sketchy blinked, shook his head, and shot a flat stare at Fit.
“Moon Rock,” said Fit quietly. “It’s an old joke in the Lunar Guard.”
Sketchy swung back to Mirror. “What’s a Lunar Guard even doing here? Don’t you have your own cases to work on?”
“You’d think so,” Mirror replied. “I’m between stations at the moment.”
“I’m not going to accept this infringement on the authority of the Manehattan Police,” said Sketchy. “We don’t need help with this case, and I’ve half a mind to write a letter to the Commissioner of the Lunar Guard.”
“I tried that once,” said Mirror. She shrugged. “Well, see you later.”
She walked away towards the door, seemingly completely unperturbed by the abbreviated conversation. Sketchy grumbled under his breath and glared at Fit. “Turn down your collar.”
Fit did, again.
Sketchy gave him and Haven one last look and headed back for his office.
When they were alone, Haven asked under her breath, “What’s her deal?”
“She...has her own way of doing things. It doesn’t make any sense.” Fit paused. “But I wouldn’t have contacted her if I didn’t think she could help.”
Haven took a breath and let it out. “Well, I hope she can.”
The two of them filed some paperwork. Fit considered it, and then opened a new file for paperwork produced on the case while Mirror was around. He had an optimistic feeling he was going to need it.
Fit had to admit, Cracked Mirror was a nut. But he knew from personal experience she was also a talented guard and one heck of a commanding officer.
He just wished he had been able to solve the case himself.
The afternoon ticked away as he stewed in his disappointment until it was time to go. Fit and Haven parted ways at the door. He headed for the gym.
They knew him there. He probably got more respect there than at the police station, too. Improving one’s body was about effort. Police work was...well, so far effort hadn’t paid off.
He picked up a few heavy things, ran some, and finished off with an instructor-led yoga class.
He was dating the instructor, but that was only partially the reason he went.
After the workout, Fit took a shower. He came out of the locker room with his gym bag. Tree Hugger was waiting for him, still in her yoga outfit.
“Hey, really righteous workout today,” she said. They kissed.
She tipped her head, studying his face. “Is there, like, something bothering you?”
Was there? “Just work stuff,” said Fit. He hoped that was all it was. He did appreciate her asking, though.
She didn’t know it, but Fit was slowly piecing together his proposal. He had the ring. He just needed a good time and place.
But no need to rush things. They were already together.
The two of them left the gym for home.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
Fit met Haven coming in the door of the station the next morning and they went to their desks. He had just sat down when the door burst open and Mirror walked in, dragging an earth pony stallion behind her.
“Hey, I got the graffiti artist from the latest scene here,” she said loud enough for the whole office to hear.
Fit was back on his hooves immediately. Mirror had been dragging her prisoner in a headlock. Fit crossed the room and relieved her, snapping some cuffs on the perp.
“W-wait!” called Haven. “Who is this? What evidence do you have?”
“Let’s get this sorted out,” Fit said to her, tilting his head towards the ponies in the rest of the room looking on with varying levels of surprise. He ushered Haven and the detainee down the hallway towards an open interrogation room. Mirror peeled off and went into the observation room, on the other side of the one-way glass.
Fit was as confused as anypony else, but he was acting as if on autopilot following Mirror’s announcement. Was that leftover instinct from the Guard?
He put the suspect down in a chair and sat across the interrogation table. Haven, looking twice as bewildered as Fit felt, paused, but after a moment sat beside Fit.
Silence reigned before Fit swallowed and remembered that he was a cop facing a suspect. “What’s your name?”
“Slider,” said the pony in cuffs, also looking bewildered. He was scruffy, probably even before Mirror had dragged him in.
Fit went on. “What did you do?”
“I can explain. I didn’t have anything to do with-”
“Wrong!” boomed Mirror’s voice through the intercom.
Slider winced. “Look, I was paid to paint that, okay? I don’t know anything about it.”
“Who put you up to it?” Haven asked, apparently getting through the confusion enough to participate in the conversation.
“I don’t know. I got an envelope in the mail with instructions and some money. It said I would get more if I painted what it said to paint where it said to paint it.”
“Where’s the letter?” Fit asked.
“I threw it away.” Slider shrugged nervously. “I didn’t think I would need it.”
“How much money?” Fit asked.
“Just a couple bits.”
“Wrong!”
“Who is she?” Slider demanded, gesturing as best as he was able to the one-way glass.
“Answer the question,” Fit ordered.
“Fifty bits. The letter said another fifty would be coming my way.”
“Did you get it yet?” Haven asked.
“No.”
“We should check his mail,” said Fit. “Maybe it’ll come today.”
“It’s just paint,” said Slider. “I’m not in trouble, am I?”
“We can charge you with criminal mischief,” said Haven. “Though maybe you can help us.”
“We’ll need to talk about it,” said Fit. He and Haven got up and left the room.
The two of them paused outside, catching their breath for the first time. Mirror joined them.
“How did you find him?” Haven asked.
“It was pretty easy,” said Mirror.
Haven stared at her, and then looked at Fit.
“Don’t ask questions you may not want to know the answer to,” Fit said.
Mirror clicked her tongue and winked, pointing to Fit.
“Can we do this?” Haven asked. “We have no idea how she got this information. We don’t know if Slider is telling the truth.”
“We can watch his mailbox,” said Fit. “If the money shows up, it’ll corroborate Slider’s story. Plus, we can see what clues we can get from it.”
“How do we know she didn’t make Slider say that?” Haven said, gesturing at Mirror.
“She got here yesterday,” said Fit. “The postmark on the envelope will tell us when it was sent.”
“But she’s known about it since you sent her that letter!” Haven argued. “None of this evidence will hold up in court!”
“You’re not after Slider for a simple case of criminal mischief,” said Mirror. “You’re after the big bosses behind the anti-Luna messages. If you don’t have any evidence against the small fry, then don’t charge him with anything.”
Haven looked at Fit accusingly. He held up a hoof. “I don’t see a problem holding Slider for a couple of hours until the mail shows up. Especially if this is the big break we’ve been looking for.”
Reluctantly, Haven nodded. “All right.”
She was usually such a stickler for rules. Maybe this case was getting to her as much as it was Fit.
Haven called an officer and made arrangements to transport Slider to a holding cell. It wouldn’t be difficult to look up his home address so they could intercept his mail.
Fit headed back to his desk to write down what he had just learned. Nosey News was standing there. “Did I hear something about you catching the graffiti artist?”
“We haven’t charged anypony,” Fit said.
“Oh, but we’re going to,” said Mirror, sliding between him and Nosey. “Though maybe not for what you might think.” She gave him a wink. “Stay tuned.”
“Oh, and who might you be?” Nosey asked, pulling out his notebook and smiling in a way he probably thought was suave.
“LIeutenant Cracked Mirror. That’s C-R-A-C-K-E-D M-I-R-R-O-R. I’m with the Lunar Guard and I’m here to help.”
Haven came back. “Mr. News, we’ve told you before, you aren’t allowed to be here!”
“Sure, sure,” said Nosey. He left, still smiling.
“Well, I’m off,” said Mirror. She followed Nosey out, leaving Haven sputtering behind her.
“What was she doing?” Haven demanded of Fit. “Now Nosey is going to tell the whole city about her!”
“I’m sure she knows,” said Fit weakly. “She has a plan.”
“Oh really? Did she tell you what it is?”
“No,” he admitted.
Haven shook her head. “If she hadn’t just brought us the first potential lead we’ve had so far, I would have already told her to go home. As it is, we still don’t have any solid evidence and nothing she does makes any sense! Not to mention, her motivation is questionable at best and I still haven’t seen any reason to trust her.”
“That was uncalled for,” said Fit. “I trust her. Isn’t that enough?”
Haven took a breath. “Okay. I have faith in you, partner. But you need to know where I stand. I can’t see any method to her madness.”
Neither did Fit, though he wasn’t going to admit it after only just getting Haven to calm down. “Let’s just take this linearly. We’ll go to Slider’s place.”
Haven nodded and the two of them headed for the door. On the way out, they stopped at the records department and got Slider’s address to guide them across town to his home of record.
Slider lived in a shabby apartment building on Fetlock Lane. His name was on one of the mailboxes in the lobby. A note was taped to it that read “Art for sale.”
“An artist,” mused Fit.
“A starving one, it looks like,” added Haven.
They went to find the building manager. When they told him who they were there for, he snorted. “Figures. Two months behind on rent. I was going to evict him this week, actually. A bed and three squares probably don’t sound too bad to him right now.”
He used a master key to open Slider’s mailbox for them. There was nothing inside it.
Fit and Haven waited around for a few minutes and their patience was rewarded by the appearance of the mailpony. “We’d like Mr. Slider’s mail, please,” said Haven. She lifted the badge hanging around her neck to show him.. The mailpony shrugged and gave the mail to her.
She and Fit went through his mail. Ads, a magazine, what appeared to be bills. Nothing that seemed to have any money inside it, or even a check.
“Maybe it’ll come tomorrow,” Fit said.
“Unless we charge Slider, we can’t keep holding him,” Haven reminded him.
“Everypony’s going to want to,” Fit replied. “It’s the first arrest we’ve ever made in connection to the case. He even admitted to it.”
“He admitted to that one because he was paid to,” Haven pointed out. “One count of criminal mischief might get him jail time, but can we make that stick? Sure, he admitted to it, but really all we have is his word. An arrest in a high profile case like this is good, but it also carries the risk of a lot of embarrassment if we’re wrong. A judge would want to see Mirror’s evidence.”
Fit glanced at a newspaper the mailpony had dropped off, and did a double take. Nosey News’ article on the graffiti artist had made front page. Somehow. He’d only found out about it a bare few hours ago. Fit picked up the paper and held it for Haven to see.
Loony Lunar Lithographer Lockup!
A graffiti artist who painted an anti-Princess Luna message has been caught, said Lieutenant Cracked Mirror, of the Lunar Guard. It is not known at this time if this suspect was also behind dozens of other graffiti pieces of the same theme appearing all over Manehattan.
Well, the news was out. If Slider had indeed been working for money, his benefactor would now know what had happened. They’d probably never send the other fifty bits, or contact him again. Unless Slider gave the police more to go on, the trail would go cold again.
Fit and Haven turned for the door. A pegasus mare wearing a messenger bag came in. She seemed to be in a hurry, but pulled up short at the sight of the two of them. Her eyes went to their badges.
She spun around, something inside her bag making a clacking sound. She kicked the door closed behind her, briefly holding up Fit and Haven. Outside, she shot into the sky.
As soon as they made it to the sidewalk, Haven also got airborne. Fit ran in the direction he’d seen the fleeing mare go, ducking between pedestrians on the sidewalk.
There was no way he could catch up from the ground, even if he had been exclusively working out with cardio. Haven wasn’t slow, but she was also cautious. A feeling of doubt and anxiety started to build.
The suspect was out of Fit’s sight in thirty seconds. Haven appeared, winded, after another two minutes. Fit slowed down. Haven landed beside him and growled, “She got away.”
Other than suspicious behavior, they didn’t have much to go on. It was possible the mare had a can of spray paint in her bag, but just having it was nothing more than circumstantial. The two of them headed back to the office with nothing to show.
“Why did she fly?” Haven grumbled. “What could we have even charged her with? We never even got the chance to properly identify ourselves before she bolted. She could say she had just remembered a very important errand.”
Fit didn’t reply. He didn’t have an answer.
Mirror was hanging around the office when they walked in. Haven stopped short, staring openmouthed. Fit cleared his throat. “Uh, ma’am? Could you come down?”
She let go of the lighting fixture from which she’d been hanging upside down. Her wings came out and spun her in a little flip right side up before she plopped down in Fit’s chair.
Bulldog glared from across the room. “She’s been up there since you two left, annoying the hay out of me.”
“I didn’t say a peep,” countered Mirror.
“You didn’t have to.”
Mirror turned to Fit, standing up to let him have his chair. “Did you find anything?”
“Nothing physical,” he replied. “But a mare came in, saw us, and took off like a rocket.”
“Oh really?” Mirror smiled. “What did she look like?”
They gave her the bare description they’d gotten, to include cutie mark. It had been a close look, but a brief one. Mirror nodded. “I’ll see what I can do.” She walked out.
“Where could she possibly be going?” Haven asked. “Does she know how many ponies live in this city?”
Fit was cautiously optimistic. Mirror had brought in Slider, after all.
Later that afternoon, he went to the gym after work. The chase earlier hadn’t been a complete enough workout. He did his usual regimen and walked back to his apartment with Tree Hugger afterwards.
After dinner, she gave him a shoulder massage. He felt like he needed it.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
In the morning, Fit sat at his desk, wondering if he should have done more about the mare who had bolted when confronted with police. Perhaps she would match the description of somepony already suspected for a crime. If nothing else, it might provide a data point.
Thoughts of what might have been were abruptly erased when Mirror came into the office, sporting a black eye.
“What happened?” Fit asked, getting up.
“The mare you told me about yesterday is named Dusty Tome. I’ll press assault charges if you want to arrest her for that. She lives on Starswirl Street.” Mirror was chipper, as if there wasn’t a hoof-shaped bruise on her face.
“What do you mean if we want to arrest her ?” asked Haven. “Hurting ponies is a crime!”
Mirror shrugged. “I mean, I could have fought back. Actually, now that I think about it, maybe I should have. She would be pretty easy for you to talk to from a hospital bed.”
“You shouldn’t joke about that,” said Haven. “Disproportionate self-defense is also a crime.”
Knowing her as he did, Fit didn’t think Mirror usually discussed theoretical situations that she wasn’t fully capable of bringing to reality. He said nothing.
“I wouldn’t want to influence the witness or anything, so I’ll just hang out here,” said Mirror.
“Oh no you don’t!” protested Bulldog. He looked around. “Where is the chief to put a stop to this kind of thing?”
“I got him a coloring book,” said Mirror. She shrugged. “He seemed to like it. Said he was taking vacation.”
Sure enough, Chief Sketchy’s office was empty and dark.
“We should get going after Dusty Tome,” said Haven. She and Fit hurried out.
Dusty Tome’s apartment building was an order of magnitude nicer than Slider’s, which still didn’t make it exactly fancy. They checked the address against the list of names at the front of the building, finding a match.
“Well, considering she’s a known flight risk,” said Haven dryly, “I’ll take the outside.”
Fit nodded and stopped by the building manager’s office. Showing his badge, he was given a master key, and he headed for the stairs. Getting up to Tome’s apartment, he knocked. The peephole darkened momentarily and there was a sudden flurry of movement from inside.
He faintly heard Haven call “Stop, police!” Fit slammed the key in the lock, twisted it, and threw the door open. Caught between Fit and Haven, Tome raised her hooves. She didn’t look happy about it either, not that they expected her to.
“You’re under arrest for assault,” said Fit, snapping the cuffs on her hooves. Haven clipped the wing bands on.
Was it surprise that flashed across Tome’s face before going back to sullenness?
Fit added, “Also, resisting arrest.” No reaction this time.
He caught Haven’s eye and pulled Tome towards the door. Haven retreated into the apartment, giving the place a once-over. Anything incriminating she spotted lying out was fair game, and cases had been won on less.
She came back, a rattling noise following her. She’d found a can of spray paint.
“What’s this?” Fit asked, though he could see perfectly well what it was. He looked at Tome expectantly.
“It’s not illegal to have paint,” she said.
Fit and Haven traded a look and mutually decided to save the questions for when they arrived back at the station. Maybe it would give the two of them time to think of good ones.
As nice as it was to finally be getting some clues in the case, this was still uncharted territory. Perhaps he was overthinking it, but Fit was aware that blowing this lead could put the case right back to stagnance. Proceeding carefully was of utmost importance.
Back at the station, they put Tome in the interrogation room and worked out a plan. She had paint, which looked like the same brand used at all the previous graffiti sites. Not damning, as they’d already discovered, because it was common brand sold nearly everywhere. But they also had her coming into Slider’s residence and fleeing from the police. None of it would hold up in court, but perhaps they had enough to convince her to come clean.
Perhaps Mirror had some advice, but she had curiously disappeared since they’d left to collect Tome. Fit glanced around the office, but didn’t take the time to search, following Haven into the interrogation room.
They read Tome her rights and sat down across the table from her. “How did this all begin?” Haven asked.
“You’ll have to be more specific,” Tome replied.
“Why did you run from us yesterday?” Fit asked.
“What are you talking about?” said Tome.
“That’s not even a good joke,” Haven responded. “What were you doing on Fetlock Lane yesterday?”
“And you walked into the apartment building of a suspect we already have in custody, saw the police, and bolted,” said Fit. “I hope you understand how suspicious that makes you look.”
“And what’s with the paint?” Haven added. “What do you do with it?”
“I’m a historian,” Tome explained. “Sometimes I need paint when I’m going to historical sites.”
“For what?” Haven pressed.
“For...painting.” Tome’s previous confidence was eroding. Just a little more, and she might actually tell them something.
“So you can imagine our suspicion when we met you, a historian with paint, in the apartment building of a pony who was arrested for painting political graffiti about the way things used to be historically,” said Fit.
“Uh...you said I could have a lawyer, right?” asked Tome.
Darn, she had gotten smart. Well, at least it seemed like they were on the right track. Fit and Haven got up, but before they could leave the room, the door opened.
Mirror came in, wearing a tie and carrying a briefcase. “Did somepony say they needed a lawyer?”
Tome raised a hoof. “Yes! Yes, I do.”
“That’s good, because I’m a lawyer,” said Mirror, coming over to her. “Here’s my card.”
“Wait, since when are you a lawyer?” Haven blurted.
“Since I passed the bar,” Mirror replied. She opened her briefcase and showed off a certificate. It was dated several years previously.
“Wait, so...you two have never met before,” said Fit slowly, looking between Tome and Mirror.
“Why would we have met before?” Tome asked. She frowned, as if realizing something, and examined both sides of the card Mirror had given her, as it was completely blank. “I don’t even know her name.”
“Right, I’m that good at confidentiality,” said Mirror. She waved the police away. “Now shoo, I need to talk to my client.”
Fit and Haven left the room. They looked at each other. Both of them opened their mouths. Both of them closed them again.
Haven was the first one to shake her head and speak. “What just happened? Did Mirror lie to us about Tome assaulting her?”
“Maybe,” said Fit, though he felt the answer was probably “yes.” “But she did find Tome for us and gave us a reason to arrest so we can hold her for awhile.”
“But lawyering? How is this going to hold up in court?”
“Well, Mirror’s not officially working for us, so I can’t even say it would be a conflict of interest,” Fit tried weakly.
Haven shook her head. “I think my point still stands. And anyway, what is she doing ?”
Fit didn’t know. He said nothing.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
In the morning, Fit opened his eyes. In the mirror, he could see Tree Hugger doing her daily routine on a mat opposite the bed. She had a slow, quiet grace that he’d never seen anypony else match. Not even when she balanced on just a single foreleg. Somehow. Fit had the muscle to do it, but not the balance.
She saw him looking and paused, smiling. She came down from her position and walked over to the bed, beginning a a gentle backrub. Fit made a small noise, just to let her know he appreciated it. He felt like he needed it, too, after the workout he’d given himself the previous day. He’d been trying to distract himself from the case.
It was perhaps the first time Fit had ever been reluctant to go to work, even in the doldrums of the previously-dead end case. He didn’t want to find out what Mirror had accomplished overnight this time. It was sure to only have led to more headaches and confusion.
Well, that, and the fact that Tree Hugger’s hooves were like magic. He really loved this girl.
She leaned over and kissed him good morning. “You were super tense, even asleep.”
It didn’t surprise Fit. He couldn’t keep making excuses for Mirror. He was going to have to demand answers from her before somepony started demanding them from him.
That reminded him that he actually needed to accomplish a few things today. He rolled over.
“I’ll lay out your suit for the ball,” Tree Hugger said.
“Oh right, that’s tonight.” Fit remembered the envelope on the kitchen table that contained tickets to the Cop Cavalcade, the annual police ball.
He kissed her again, and got out of bed.
When he arrived at the office, Mirror was already there. Haven wasn’t, which was perfect for Fit. He motioned to Mirror and they went into the interrogation room.
“I recommend you drop charges on both Slider and Tome,” she said, before he could speak.
Fit blinked. “Why?”
“Neither one of them could probably be convicted with the evidence we have. Plus, putting them back on the streets will freak out the ones they’re working for, sending a message and shaking them up just like the article I fed that journalist.”
Fit shook his head. “Are you trying to make this more convoluted? Are you doing it on purpose?”
“Yes.”
He sighed and just looked at her.
“You trust me, right?” she said.
Fit hesitated. “Yes, but it’s a two way street.”
Mirror nodded. “Fair enough. I do owe you an explanation.”
She lowered her voice, despite them being in a soundproofed room. “The EUP is behind this.”
“The Earth, Unicorn, and Pegasus Guard of the Protective Pony Platoons,” said Fit flatly.
Anypony who had been a member of the Guard knew it had originally been formed as the EUP to protect Princess Celestia and keep the peace shortly after she had banished her sister to the moon. Over the next thousand years, it had gradually grown into the Solar Guard, with the Lunar Guard being a relatively recent creation since Princess Luna’s return. The old EUP moniker had been regulated to an auxiliary organization centered around and serving Guard veterans and retirees.
“The EUP,” Fit went on incredulously, “the ponies who run the hospitals and taverns for former Guards.”
“So you can see why I’m doing this,” said Mirror. “Nopony is going to believe me and it’ll take time to put together enough evidence to prove it.”
“But - the EUP?” Fit said. “The most nefarious thing they’ve ever done is take a whole two weeks to get me a doctor appointment. It seems unlikely.”
Mirror held out her hoof. “Case in point. Okay, I’ll acknowledge that it probably isn’t the whole group, but some evil faction within it working for nefarious purposes to return to the old ways - bringing glory to Princess Celestia and diminishing Princess Luna.”
“Like a cult.”
Mirror grinned, fangs poking past her lips. “Now you’re catching on.”
Fit gestured vaguely to the bruise on Mirror’s face. “So, you went to all this trouble, even punching yourself in the face?”
Mirror kept smiling but said nothing. Fit realized the police report on Tome’s assault charge listed her as the victim, though Mirror herself had never explicitly stated that. What she didn’t say couldn’t be used against her.
Fit stared at the table. Mirror was not infallible. More than once he had followed her astray. But Fit realized he’d do it again. This was crazy. This was skirting the fringe of legality if it hadn’t already passed that line. The case was even more opaque than before. But he did trust her.
The two of them left the room. Mirror pulled out her roll of lamp wick. “I can’t smoke in here, can I?”
There weren’t any specific rules about it. Nopony Fit recalled had ever wanted to. But he said, “Probably not.”
She nodded and went out. Bulldog glared after her and swung around to look at Fit. “Is she some kind of junkie?”
A drug problem would explain a lot about Mirror, but just like everything else about her, the simplest answer was probably not correct.
Fit replied, “She’d be calmer if she was.”
Haven came in a few minutes later. Fit debated what he should tell her, and eventually just repeated what Mirror had told him.
“Seriously?” Haven said, voice just as incredulous as Fit had been. “Drop charges and start looking into some veterans’ organization?”
“That’s what she told me,” he said.
“Do you believe it?”
Fit sighed. “I believe in her. And you have to admit, she’s produced at least a few results since arriving.”
“Results that we can’t use to get our bosses off our backs because she wants to let them go!”
“Maybe we can pitch it as a covert surveillance opportunity.”
Haven considered it. “Maybe. But we’d have to be careful.”
She bumped his shoulder with her hoof. “Take off that salmon polo shirt and you’d be unrecognizable.”
“Maybe,” Fit agreed.
He did just that, and Haven borrowed a long dress from the evidence locker. They both also requisitioned hats Then, they asked Bulldog to release the two ponies in holding. He wasn’t pleased, but Mirror was nowhere to be found, so he did them the favor.
Fit and Haven were waiting, covertly, when Slider and Dusty Tome were dumped on the street. The two of them traded uneasy glances and then walked off in opposite directions.
“Which one do you think?” Haven said.
“Dusty Tome,” Fit decided. “I think she knows more than she said.”
They followed at a distance. Tome was either not aware that she was being followed, or very casual about it. She apparently didn’t care much for jail food, either, and stopped at a café.
It was lunch time, so Fit and Haven decided to stop as well. It would be a little bit of a gamble, but the restaurant was crowded and they were able to find a table in the back, well away from Tome.
“I wonder if we’ll turn up anything,” said Haven. She made a face. “This salad is terrible.”
“All salad is terrible,” Fit said.
“You eat it every day.”
“Because it’s good for me.”
“Is Cracked Mirror good for you?”
“I think we can agree that she’s good for the case.”
“That wasn’t what I asked.”
Fit paused, considering his words. “She was the best and the worst boss I ever had. I don’t want to be like her, but that doesn’t mean I can’t take a lesson or two.” He frowned. “If her lessons weren’t so obtuse.”
“I can’t imagine working with her on a daily basis for years.”
Fit actually smiled, unexpected reminisces coming to him. “Best and worst years of my life.”
They crammed their lunch down in time to follow Tome back out of the café. She turned for downtown and spread her wings. Haven followed her aloft while Fit quickly summoned a cab. It would be less suspicious than him running.
They were able to keep up, because Tome still hadn’t noticed them. However, as they traced her route, Fit began to get a feeling about where she might be headed.
His suspicions were confirmed when she landed in front of the EUP hospital downtown and went inside.
The hospital wasn’t in a bad part of town, though it was surrounded by businesses and had a slightly industrial feel. A heavy, circular stone hung above the front door was inscribed with the combined crest of the guard. It wasn’t the greatest hospital, government-run efficiency after all, but it was better than nothing. Fit had been there often enough for regular checkups. It also helped him test his willpower to remain healthy, as there was a craft maple syrup distillery next door.
Haven landed on the sidewalk beside him. So did Mirror.
“How long have you been following us?” Fit asked.
“Since you left the station,” Mirror said. “And while I’m proud of you for eating your vegetables, Haven was right: that salad was terrible.”
“I didn’t see you at the restaurant,” sputtered Haven.
Mirror abruptly changed the subject, pushing forward through the hospital doors. “Let’s go see where Tome is headed.”
Fit and Haven followed behind. Haven asked in a low voice, only meant for Fit, “You don’t think she has us bugged somehow, do you?”
“Not that I know of,” Fit said, suddenly troubled that Mirror might. “More likely, she just took off her tail band.”
“Wait, you worked with her for how long and you don’t know what she actually looks like without the bat pony glamour?”
“No, I don’t.”
Haven stared at him incredulously and then shook her head.
They caught up with Mirror, who was consulting a directory near the front desk. Tome had apparently managed to slip away.
“I wonder if she’s associated with somepony who works here or something,” Mirror speculated. She shrugged. “I’m sure we’ll find the connection eventually. There’s still a lot of room for good police work.”
“Is that what you want us to do when you’re done doing whatever it is you do?” said Haven.
“Yep. I just take the shortcuts so the straightaways are easier. Now that we know about Tome, we can figure out where she fits in.”
“How did you find her, anyway?” Haven asked.
“I met up with Mare Do Well last night and after trading some information we put our heads together and figured it out,” Mirror said.
“Mare-” Haven began. She shook her head. “That’s a fictional character Princess Twilight and her friends made up! Everypony has read their friendship journal!”
Mirror tipped her head. “Well, I met up with her last night.”
Haven looked at Fit. He gave her a bewildered shrug.
“Anyway,” said Mirror, “I need to get going. If you need to contact me, I’m in room 101 at the Midnight Motel on Tallpine Street.” She walked away.
Haven stared after the departing Mirror and shook her head. “Unbelievable.”
“She was right about the EUP connection,” Fit pointed out.
“That doesn’t mean I believe we have Princess Twilight or somepony running around Manehattan in a costume.”
“It is hard to believe,” Fit conceded. “Then again, if it’s actually real, it wouldn’t the tallest tale turning out to be true that she ever told me.”
Haven glanced at him, looked like she wanted to say something, but then shook her head and turned away.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
Researching Dusty Tome took the better part of the day. That was a little difficult to do just by tracking down connections. Still, Fit and Haven, left alone, managed to put their heads together and turn up a few leads.
Being cops, it wasn’t difficult to go down to city hall and gain access to public records. Dusty Tome had a history of a few addresses under her name, a few accounts with utility companies and registrations.
The two of them met at a borrowed table between rows of filing cabinets and started to put the puzzle together.
“We should cross-reference her first address on record,” Fit said. “Maybe that will be the same as her parents.”
“The joys of family research in a country without last names,” Haven said. She waved a piece of paper. “Or, we could just check her birth certificate.”
“That would be much easier,” Fit agreed. “Glad you found it. I got stuck with homes of record and medical notes.”
Haven put down the certificate and they examined it. Tome’s parents were Acerbic Cure and Library Long. The doctor’s name on the certificate was also Acerbic Cure.
Fit frowned and pulled over Tome’s medical records. Her doctor on all of them was, again, Acerbic Cure.
“Safe bet what he does for a living,” Haven remarked. “What do you think about Library Long?”
“I’m going to go out on a limb and guess Dusty Tome might have taken after her mother.”
They divided again and went to search for Tome’s parents. This was easier. Both of them were former Solar Guards. Not surprisingly, Acerbic Cure was a medic and Library Long had worked in the history division.
“What’s the history division about?” Haven wondered as they met again to compare notes. Both of them had also found a few pictures.
Fit shrugged. “The Lunar Guard only has a few decades of history, so we didn’t have a whole division for it.”
He turned over a page. It was a recent tax record for Acerbic Cure, that listed his employer as the Manehattan EUP hospital. Fit wasn’t sure if he should be surprised or not.
Fit studied the notes again, frowning. “So we have Tome seemingly instigating ponies to paint anti-Luna graffiti. We saw her going to the EUP hospital where her father works. Her father is a former Solar Guard and her mother is a former Solar Guard historian. It looks like their family are the ones who want to go back to the old ways, when the Solar Guard was the only guard.”
“Only circumstantial, though,” Haven sighed. “Well, at least we have suspects now.”
Fit was still frowning. “It can’t be this simple, can it?”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s just...while we don’t have any concrete evidence, it just seems to wrap up too nicely. I can hardly believe one family was behind all this. Mirror said it was a cult.”
Haven shook her head. “We’ve got the perps! We make these arrests and the public will love us! We’ll put this case away for good.”
“But what if it’s a cult?”
Haven rolled her eyes and started to to reply, but Fit held up a hoof. “I’m just saying, if there’s even one other pony involved that we don’t know about, we’ll look bad when the graffitti resumes. It doesn’t hurt to be careful. Not to mention, we still have to gather enough evidence to make a case stick.”
Haven looked at him for a moment, and then nodded. “Alright.” She glanced up at the clock. “We should put all these records back. The ball is tonight.”
Fit nodded and the two of them refilled the filing cabinets that they had scoured.
He made a quick stop at the office to check messages and then headed back to his apartment. Tree Hugger was already there, getting ready for the event. Fit had a quick shower and put on his suit. Tree Hugger wore a purple dress without too many frills. Hoof in hoof, they headed downtown to a fancy hotel where the ballroom had been rented out for the Cop Cavalcade. It was the annual Manehattan police party.
Not surprisingly, security was tight. Fit presented the tickets to the burly door pony and in return he and Tree Hugger were granted passage.
The ballroom was fancy, but looked even better hung with blue and gold streamers. Fit looked around, seeing lots of fellow Manehattan cops, including those from other precincts. Not surprisingly, the conversation was already loud and stood a pretty decent chance of getting more boisterous the longer the evening went on and the more drinks that were poured.
Fit turned in surprise as an unexpected guest approached. He raised his voice over the crowd. “Plowshore, what are you doing here?”
The deputy from the Manehattan County Sheriff's office shook hooves with Fit and Tree Hugger. “I heard they undersold for the size of the venue and needed to expand, so they offered tickets around the city.” He shrugged. “Nice digs, anyway. Good to see you.”
“Who else came?” Fit asked, looking around the crowd.
“There’s a couple of us here. You know Rutabaga, right? I think they also opened it up to the local Guard unit, but I don’t know any of them.”
Plowshore said goodbye and went to mingle elsewhere. Fit turned back to Tree Hugger, sweeping his eyes over the crowd again as he did so. Nosey News was in attendance.
He smiled and came over. “Detective.”
“Who sold a reporter a ticket to a cop party?” Fit asked.
“Sources.” Nosey nodded to him and walked away. Fit followed him with his eyes. He saw Haven coming in the door and waved to her.
She came over and said hello, pausing to trade a quick embrace with Tree Hugger. “You’re both looking good tonight.”
“You’re pretty far out, too,” said Tree Hugger. Haven wore in a red silk dress that complimented her color well.
Haven opened her mouth to reply, but paused, her eyes going to the far side of the room. Fit, instincts well in tune with his partner, followed her gaze.
Acerbic Cure and Library Long were socializing with a group of ponies across the room.
“What is it?” Tree Hugger asked.
“It’s...a work thing,” said Fit. He looked at her. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be, I know you work hard.” She touched his shoulder and smiled. “I’ll get us some punch.”
“What are they doing here?” Haven said under her breath as Tree Hugger departed.
“I heard that the ball was opened up to the Guard,” said Fit. “Maybe somepony invited them. I wouldn’t be surprised if they still know plenty of other guards, or even regular cops.”
“We can’t talk to them here,” said Haven. “Professional courtesy if nothing else.”
Fit nodded, thinking about it. If Acerbic Cure and Library Long did know somepony important, which was not unlikely, it would be even more distasteful to interrogate the pair of them right here and now.
“Well, good thing I’m not courteous,” said Cracked Mirror, walking up and standing between Fit and Haven.
Her mane was combed out and straight. She wore a neat black suit, a purple tie, and a manic grin.
“How did you get in here?” Haven said.
“I bought a ticket.”
“I’m surprised they let you,” Haven replied.
“I called in a few favors.”
Fit tried to think of who in Manehattan could possibly owe her a favor and also who would have access to Cop Cavalcade tickets.
“So who are we not being courteous to?” Mirror asked.
Fit pointed out their marks and told her who they were.
“Tome’s parents are former Solar Guards? That’s some mighty fine police work.” She patted them both on the back. Haven flinched.
Mirror squared her shoulders, straightened her tie, and announced, “Well, here I go.”
And there she went.
Tree Hugger returned just then with three glasses of punch. Fit and Haven both kept one eye peeled to where Mirror approached Tome’s parents, but pretended they were involved in the conversation with Tree Hugger.
“The new flowerbeds they planted in the city park are totally righteous,” said Tree Hugger.
“Uh huh,” said Fit.
“I was thinking of going down there this weekend and just interacting, you know?”
“Sure,” said Haven.
“There’s just something dopamine-inducing about the olfactory sensations from a good plot of angiospermae.”
“Uh huh,” said Fit.
He watched Mirror talk to the two retired Guards across the room for several seconds before he realized his marefriend wasn’t still talking.
He swung his head around to find Tree Hugger staring at him. “I-” Fit fumbled, but there was no point in excuses. “Sorry, Treezie.”
“I know you’ve been really stressed about this case,” said Tree Hugger. “If it’s that important, I’m not going to keep you from it.”
“I’m sorry,” Fit said again.
“Well, this party wasn’t really my speed anyway.” She kissed him. “I’ll see you at home.”
Guilt ate at him as she walked away. Worse, he couldn’t help but feel that it was somehow Mirror’s fault. What trouble had she led him into this time?
Haven, at least, didn’t adopt a told-you-so expression. Fit sighed, pushing aside his thoughts for a moment. Well, to work, then.
Moving together, he and Haven turned diagonally to where Mirror was talking with Acerbic Cure and Library Long. Best not to approach directly. Though, with Mirror there, Fit was fairly sure they were distracted.
On an unspoken cue, the two of them split, moving apart to better approach the action. Fit spotted Plowshore and angled closer.
Fit said hello to the deputy and a couple of the ponies Plowshore was talking to, still sliding closer to his targets. On the other side, he saw Haven doing much the same thing, but not quite as close.
From just a few feet away, Fit got a good look at Acerbic Cure and Library Long, having only seen them in photos before.
Library Long actually was. Long, that is. Not freakishly so, but if Fit were into torsos...well, he’d be gay for Discord, but he’d still notice this mare. She and her husband were both middle aged, as expected of parents who had an adult child.
He still couldn’t quite make out what Mirror was saying over the crowd, but thought that getting any closer would probably blow his cover. Mirror seemed animated enough. Her conversation partners were listening, though perhaps not enthusiastically.
She seemed to come to a conclusion and clapped both of them on the shoulders before turning to walk away, still wearing the manic grin. Acerbic and Library glanced at each other and then began to make their way towards the door.
Fit caught Haven’s eye. Mirror was already gone. He wondered what her game was this time. He and Haven followed their marks from a distance. Sure enough, they casually made for the door, occasionally pausing to speak to ponies on the way.
“I wonder what she said to them,” Fit said.
Haven shrugged.
The two of them followed Acerbic and Library all the way out of the building. The sun had set hours before. Acerbic leaned into his wife as they headed off down the street. Fit frowned. Surely he wasn’t that intoxicated. No, it didn’t look like he was swaying, just maintaining constant contact with the mare beside him.
Fit paused to speak with Haven, but a flicker of movement out of the corner of his eye distracted him. Haven also followed his look, up to the rooftop of the building across the street.
In the moonlight there was a billow of cape, and then it was gone.
Fit knew what he’d seen, or thought he’d seen, but he was grateful that Haven was the first to speak.
“You don’t think she put on a Mare Do Well costume, do you?” Haven asked incredulously.
“I...wouldn’t put it past her.” Fit frowned. “But dressing up like somepony else doesn’t seem her style.”
“She’s literally never not dressed like a bat pony.”
Being that Fit didn’t know what Mirror actually looked like, he realized that he had always thought of her just as she appeared, as if it was who she really was. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Well, it’s either that or Mare Do Well is real.”
Fit gestured to the rooftops. “Mare Do Well is real. Or was, anyway. Kind of.”
“Which do you think is more plausible? That your boss has superhero fantasies, or that Princess Twilight and her friends are here to solve crimes as vigilantes?”
The worst part was, Fit wasn’t sure.
Source
Return the Night, or no Deposit
The two of them stood outside the hotel. The sounds of the Cop Cavalcade carried out into the night. Fit wracked his brain and came up with a decision. “I’m going to go after them.”
Haven looked at him. “Tome’s parents? What do you expect to find in the middle of the night after a party?”
“I don’t know. But whether that was Mare Do Well we saw on the rooftops or just Mirror, I think it’s worth pursuing what she was pursuing.”
Haven started to turn away. “We’re off the clock.”
“This could be a breakthrough.”
She looked back at him. “So what if it is? What are you going to do? Just let Mirror handle it? She’s already basically taken the case from us. She’s tainted so much evidence that we’ll probably never get a conviction on anypony.”
“I’m confident,” said Fit. “She knows how the law works.”
“Are you sure?” Haven broke in. “Are you seriously throwing away everything you’ve been taught and your own convictions to follow her blindly? You’re my partner, but I can’t back you in this. I’ve told you what I think. You know what the rest of the office thinks. You’re alone in this.” Haven shrugged. “Well, maybe you have her.”
Fit’s stomach twisted. First Tree Hugger and now Haven leaving him alone tonight.
“I’m just going to go for a walk,” he said. “I’m just going to make sure Acerbic Cure and Library Long make it home alright. Then, I’m going home myself. I promise you.”
“Have you ever promised her like that?”
Fit thought on it. “No, actually.”
Haven remained staring at him for a moment before turning away. “Good night. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“You too.” Fit paused to watch her walk away, and exhaled as she rounded the corner of the building. He’d never felt the need to promise Mirror anything. When they’d worked together, that kind of understanding was implied. But he hadn’t told Haven that.
He turned and walked in the other direction, hurrying to catch up with Acerbic and Library. Spotting them up ahead under the streetlights, he held back, staying just within view. If they were sharp, they might recognize him from the party, but then, he was a cop, that shouldn’t make him seem suspicious. He hoped.
They walked for perhaps ten minutes until Acerbic and Library turned and went up the steps of a townhouse. Fit noted that it was only perhaps another ten minute walk to the hospital.
He paused for a moment to scan the rooftops, but saw nothing. He wasn’t sure if he was hoping to.
Turning to leave, he hesitated. It was also only perhaps a ten minute walk from the Midnight Motel on Tallpine Street, and close to being on his way home. Would Mirror be there? If so, she could tell him what she’d learned tonight from talking to Acerbic and Library. If she wasn’t there...well, it still wouldn’t be proof that she was running around as Mare Do Well.
Fit hesitated, but made his choice. His promise to Haven never said he wouldn’t make a detour along the way, and she would also probably like to know about Mirror’s conversation with Tome’s parents.
A short walk later, Fit found the Midnight Motel. The neon tubes in the sign out front flickered against the night sky. In the darkness, it was hard to tell if the place was decrepit or decent. He remembered Mirror was staying in room 101.
He didn’t bother with the front desk and went straight for the room, as the room doors were outside. As he approached, he slowly realized that the door wasn’t quite closed. A sliver of light from the room beyond showed through the crack.
Mirror, freewheeling as she may have been, did not do things by accident. Okay, maybe she did and was always quick with a comeback to disguise it, but several other scenarios also ran through Fit’s mind. He put his hoof on the knob and slowly opened the door.
The room was ransacked, though as Fit stared, he began to realize that all the furniture was in place. Everything strewn around had apparently come out of a battered suitcase. He slowly calmed down. Mirror was apparently just making herself at home.
Speaking of, he realized that he heard water running. The bathroom door was closed. Mirror must be inside, having a shower.
Fit wasn’t sure if he should stay. The door had been open-was she expecting somepony? Was she expecting him ? Did she want him to show up to talk about Acerbic and Library?
Fit considered it, and then sat down on the bed. His hoof brushed against something and he picked it up. It was one of the enchanted tail bands that gave members of the Lunar Guard their distinctive batlike appearance. He’d worn one occasionally during his service. Mirror never took off hers.
Wait a second…
The water stopped. Fit stood up and turned, still holding the band. The door opened and a mare came out, drying her mane with a towel. She pulled it down from in front of her face and stopped short in surprise. “What the-Fit, what are you doing here?”
Mirror stared at him, bat eyes wide. Even despite her wet coat and mane, she wore an enchanted tail band.
Fit dropped the other one on the bed and took a sheepish step back, looking away. “Sorry. The door was open. I wanted to talk about tonight.”
Mirror started to dry her tail, but didn’t take her eyes off him. “Not much to tell. They didn’t like the questions and left.”
“I followed them to their place,” said Fit. “Nothing out of the ordinary.”
“Yep, that about sums it up,” said Mirror. “We can talk more later.”
Fit frowned at her attitude and thought of the door. “Were you expecting somepony?”
“I wouldn’t want to keep you. Tree Hugger’s probably waiting on you,” said Mirror.
He could feel her pushing him out, and though he should have trusted his instincts and hers, after the night he’d had, Fit felt obligated to at least learn something . “I just wanted to ask you a few questions.”
When suddenly put on the spot, though, Fit’s mind seized. She’d already told him that nothing out of the ordinary had happened. Where could he go from here?
He blurted, “I didn’t think you were still in the Guard. I don’t know how you still have a tail band, much less two.”
“You want one?” Mirror said. “Could come in handy.” She picked the extra up off the bed and offered it to him. “A gift to you before you go.”
He shook his head and declined. “Okay, I’ll take the hint. I probably shouldn’t have come. I just don’t know why you gave me your room number, if it’s going to be like that.”
“Stuff happens,” said Mirror brusquely. “You need to leave.”
Fit nodded reluctantly and turned for the door, contemplating his parting remarks. What could he say? Why was Mirror acting like this?
In the end, he said nothing, and went home.
Tree Hugger was sleeping soundly when he got there, which was good for her. Fit was envious that she never seemed bothered by anything that happened around her. He lay awake beside her, trying to figure out what had been going on with Mirror at her hotel room. Was she really that surprised to see him?
Okay, yes, walking in on a mare in the shower wasn’t polite. Mirror had always been private outside of work. Fit felt guilty, but he also couldn’t shake the feeling that it wasn’t just that. Mirror was again working an unseen angle.
In the morning, Fit headed to work. He met Haven on the sidewalk, approaching from the other direction, and they walked into the building together.
“Did you get anything last night?” she asked.
“No,” Fit replied truthfully.
They both sat down at their desks. Across the room, Bulldog seemed to be in a decent mood. Fit realized Mirror wasn’t around and figured that contributed to it.
An hour passed. Fit caught up on a few things. Haven was busy restocking the emergency kit she kept under her desk.
Something was nagging Fit, but it took him awhile longer to figure out what it was. He was subconsciously expecting Mirror to tell him what to do next.
Well, she wasn’t here. He would have to do as he did before she arrived. Which was…
Fit blinked. No, the old wait and see approach didn’t work. He and Haven had clues now. They should follow them up.
He caught her eye. “Do you want to make another pass at the records office?”
Haven straightened up from her prepping. “I suppose. From what we learned yesterday, we might be able to find more.”
The two of them got up. As they walked past Bulldog’s desk, he said, “Your freak’s late today.”
If it had been anyone else Fit knew, he probably would have reprimanded Bulldog for it. But he knew Mirror wouldn’t care. Instead, he said, “She doesn’t really think of time like that. She always arrives exactly when she means to.”
Bulldog shrugged and didn’t reply. Fit and Haven headed past him towards city hall.
Deep in the records department, they made slight headway, turning up service records for both Acerbic Cure and Library Long.
Fit skimmed them, just to see if anything stood out. He noted that both of them had joined the service on medical waivers. Their first duty assignment was different, but after that the two of them had always been stationed at the same places. That must have been where they met. Married Guards, particularly those married to each other, were occasionally offered some leeway in assignments.
“Now that we’ve identified them, I kind of want to interview them,” Fit said. “I know we don’t have much to go on, but asking a few questions could get us more.”
“Wasn’t that what Mirror was already doing?” said Haven. “Do you think she learned anything?”
“I don’t know.” Fit frowned. “At the same time, I don’t know if I want to move on Acerbic and Library for fear of interfering with whatever Mirror might be doing.”
Haven gave him a look which Fit acknowledged with a nod. “We could try to go see her. If nothing else, to deconflict.”
“It’s lunchtime anyway,” Haven pointed out.
The two of them stored the files once more and headed out. There was one of the many corner diners in the city on the way to Mirror’s motel and they stopped for a bite.
After ordering, the two of them sat quietly on the bar stools. Fit took a sip of water. Haven inspected the napkin holder.
She asked suddenly, “Do you really think Mare Do Well is somepony besides Mirror?”
Fit considered it for a long moment. “If I had to give odds, I’d say sixty percent that Mare Do Well is real.”
“Mare Do Well isn’t real, it’s just somepony in a costume,” said Haven. “I’d say eighty percent that it’s Mirror herself.”
Fit raised his eyebrows. “Only eighty?”
Haven rolled her eyes. “You seem confident. Do you want to bet on it?”
“Alright. Lunch?”
“Sure. But I want to see both of them together before I’ll believe it.”
Their food came. Fit picked up his sandwich but paused before taking a bite. “If it makes you feel any better, I know an expert in illusions. It’s Trixie, if you’ve heard of her. I can send her a telegram. Maybe she can tell us something about disguises.”
“Trixie? The stage magician?” Haven asked. “How did you meet her?”
“Just in passing. She was in the Guard for a little while. We were both at the Wash Margin Guard station. She was on her way out as I was on my way in.”
“Hmm.” Haven chewed and swallowed. “I’m not sure I should trust your taste in consultants.”
Fit nodded. “Fair enough.”
After lunch, the two of them headed for the Midnight Motel. The door was still slightly ajar as they approached. Haven looked concerned, but Fit paused to knock. A few seconds passed, but there was no response.
He pushed open the door and stepped inside. Beside him, Haven gasped. “What happened here?”
Fit frowned. Just like yesterday, there were clothes and luggage items scattered everywhere. It was still messy, but now the bedside dresser was overturned, the mattress had been pushed askew off the box frame, and a lamp from atop the dresser had been broken on the floor.
“You don’t think there was a fight, do you?” Haven took a few steps forward. She picked up a hoof, staring at the tail band she had stepped on.
“Maybe,” Fit allowed. Had Mirror been expecting one? Was that why she wanted him to leave? Was she expecting somepony else and had been doublecrossed? In either case, who?
Haven looked at him uncertainly. “Is this enough to file a report?”
Was Mirror in over her head? Did she just want them to think she was?
“Let’s do it,” Fit decided. “If she’s really missing, we need to get searching as soon as possible. She wouldn’t want us to worry unnecessarily.”
“Okay,” said Haven, “But if she pops out and says ‘surprise!’ I’m not going to be a happy pony.”
“She’s not really into pranks,” said Fit. “She was weird, sure, and grated on a lot of ponies, but she never indulged herself at somepony else’s expense.”
“Does Tree Hugger know that you’re into her?”
Fit looked at her sharply, but before he could reply, Haven drew back. “Sorry, that was out of line.”
“You’re darn right it is. She’s too old for me and I couldn’t stand the lack of stability.”
Breaking off the conversation, he left the room and went to the front desk of the motel, asking the clerk to call the police.
After that, there was nothing to do but wait. Back in the room, Fit picked up the discarded tail band. He looked at it unseeingly, distracting himself thinking about a different kind of band: the wedding ring in his dresser drawer.
It used to be his mother’s. Not a traditional gift for an earth pony bride, but he wasn't expecting her to wear jewelry anyway. It was about the symbolism of the moment when he finally proposed. He'd been planning it for months.
He had a lot of time to think before the uniforms and CSIs showed up, Fit and Haven watched them comb the room, bagging and tagging. Aside from what might have been a fight, there wasn’t much evidence.
They stepped outside for a breath of fresh air and stood quietly together. Haven said, “Sorry again about earlier. I know you’re committed to Tree Hugger.”
“I can’t picture Cracked Mirror having a relationship with anyone,” said Fit. “I mean, when I first met her, I have to admit she was fascinating, but that was about it. Once you get past the Manic Pixie Dream Mare, there just isn’t any attraction. And, if I can be shallow for a moment, I don’t even know what she looks like.”
“So how do you know how old she is? How old is she?”
Fit shrugged. “Older than me. She outranked me, and was the commander at Wash Margin well before I showed up.”
Haven let a few seconds pass. “What do you think happened to her?”
“What, to make her the way she is?”
“I meant just now in her motel room.”
Fit considered it. “I don’t know. We didn’t find any blood.”
“She punched herself in the face to get us closer to Tome. You don’t think she faked a foalnapping?”
Fit wouldn’t put it past Mirror. But acknowledging that would delegitimize the crime scene status of the motel room, not to mention get them in so much trouble. He could only imagine Chief Sketchy’s reaction.
“If it gets us results,” he said.
“You know I don’t like doing things this far off the books.”
“I know. I didn’t ask her to do this.”
“Well, she’s the kind of pony who gives herself a black eye when you don’t even ask her to. I think we lost a say in how she’s working this case a long time ago.”
Another thing Fit had lost control over. He stared into the distance and said nothing.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
By the next morning, Mirror had still not turned up despite an official missing pony report going out. Surely a city full of police officers would have spotted an eccentric bat pony if she wanted to be found.
Fit lay in bed, staring at the ceiling as the morning light crept past the curtains. Lying here wasn’t going to find Mirror. There was still doubt in his mind that this wasn’t some elaborate setup. But even if it was, it was probably Mirror’s intent that he look for her.
Tree Hugger’s sleepy face appeared in the corner of his vision. “Hey. You taking a personal day?”
Fit lifted his head high enough to see the clock. He was going to be late if he didn’t get out of bed now. He pulled back the sheets and sat up. “No, I need to get going.”
“You came back kind of late yesterday,” said Tree Hugger, moving closer to touch his back as he sat on the edge of the bed.
“Yeah. Long day. My old boss - she’s a consultant now - we’re working a case together and she might be missing. I hope she isn’t, but we’re looking for her. There’s this case that’s taken a turn and Haven and I are trying to figure it out.” He shook his head. “It’s complicated.”
“Must be. You even missed the gym yesterday.”
Fit grimaced.
“Hey.”
He turned his head. Tree Hugger smiled, eyes half-closed. “I believe in you.”
Fit spared a moment to kiss her. He desperately wanted to marry this girl.
Soon.
Fit threw on a polo shirt and trotted downtown. He grabbed a bagel from the coffee pushcart on the way. A poor breakfast and a skipped exercise day wouldn’t hurt him, but he would have to be careful not to do too much of that.
He made it in the door just as Haven was arriving. She smiled when she saw him, which caught Fit off guard. “You’ll never believe what I found,” she said. She showed him a leaflet. The Great and Powerful Trixie! was spelled out in flashy letters, above a picture of the mare herself.
“Wow,” said Fit, taking it from her and reading the details. “Tonight huh?” He frowned. “Maybe under different circumstances. I’d love to take Treezie, but not when we have so much going on.”
He paused. “Well, I guess what do we have to lose from bringing Trixie in? She knows Mirror, too.”
“You were serious about that?” said Haven.
“She can always tell us no. If we don’t have any other ideas, it wouldn’t hurt to at least talk to her.” Fit glanced at the clock. “She won’t be there now, but maybe if we check this afternoon she’ll be rehearsing.”
The two of them walked into the office. Bulldog held up the newspaper he was reading. “Have you seen this?”
Fit had not. He took the paper with magic.
Federal Agent Foalnapped!
Lieutenant Cracked Mirror, of the Lunar Guard, went missing from her hotel room after working with Manehattan Police on the case of the mysterious anti-Princess Luna graffitti appearing around the city. Mirror was said to be nearing a breakthrough in the case. Her room bore indications of a fight, and nopony has seen or heard from her since. Mirror was a graduate of the highly prestigious Night Ranger school, an elite Lunar Guard training course, and had served abroad in Echo Corps. She was said to have extensive experience with survival, escape, and stealth.
The article was by Nosey News.
“Wasn’t Echo Corps the unit that did the raid into dragon lands a few years ago to rescue some hostages?” said Haven. “I think I remember hearing something about that. Is it true that Mirror was a member?”
“Definitely not at that time, but maybe she was earlier. Maybe…” Fit frowned. “Maybe she fed Nosey this story just like she did last time.”
“Are you done with my paper?” said Bulldog. Fit gave it back.
Turning to Haven, Fit said, “I think we need to go talk to Nosey.”
As bothersome as the nosey reporter had been, they had his address on file. The newspaper office was a short walk away, which explained why Nosey was always hanging around the police station.
His hooves were up on his desk when Fit and Haven walked in. He dropped them and stood up, grinning. “Well now, what can I do for you today, officers?”
“You don’t have to play coy, you know why we’re here,” said Fit. “What more can you tell us about Cracked Mirror?”
“I was under the impression you already knew her.”
“You know what I meant,” said Fit. “What happened to her?”
Nosey shrugged. “Just what I printed. I think it’s implied that whoever she was after was who foalnapped her.”
“Any idea who they might be or what they might have done with her?”
“Nope. But rest assured, I’m following this very closely.” Nosey continued to grin.
Fit wanted to strangle him.
“Who told you this?” Haven asked.
“Can’t tell you. Sources.” Nosey winked.
“But it wasn’t Cracked Mirror herself?”
Nosey’s brow wrinkled. “How could it have been? She’s the one who’s missing.”
Haven dismissed it with a wave of her hoof. “Do you have a way of contacting this source again to ask them more questions?”
“Probably not. But if they have something to say, maybe they’ll contact me.”
“What’s that’s supposed to mean?” Fit asked.
Nosey shook his head. “Sorry folks, that’s all I’ve got.”
Fit still wanted to strangle him, but said, “Tell you want. If you hear anything, I want you to bring it to us first.”
Nosey started to open his mouth, but Fit held up a hoof. “I will promise you the complete story once the case is solved. But first I need your help on this.”
“Hmm.” Nosey shrugged. “Deal.”
As Fit and Haven left the office, she said, “You didn’t have to promise him that.”
“You know Nosey. He was going to find out anyway. Heck, Mirror might just tell him herself.” Changing the subject, Fit said, “Who do you think his source is?”
“Do you think it was Mirror herself, out of disguise?”
“Maybe. Do you think it was Mare Do Well, or whoever plays her?”
Neither one of them had a good answer. The fact that they were even considering superheros showed how far off track this case had gotten. Fit pulled himself back to the present. “Maybe we could go see Trixie now.”
The two of them headed for the venue listed on the flyer. The doors were open, but nopony besides stage hands were around. Acting on a hunch, however, Fit left the building and went around back.
There was a purple wagon decorated with stars parked there. Haven evaluated it. “The paint’s nice, but I’m not sure if the wheels and axles are up to code.”
Fit shrugged. “I heard about her wagon, but I’ve never seen it before.”
Haven glanced at the flyer, which featured a prominent photo of Trixie in her purple cape and pointed hat. “It looks like hers, though. It even has a little version of her hat as the rain cover on the chimney.”
Fit knocked on the door.
“What is it? The Great and Powerful Trixie doesn’t go on for another few hours .” The voice put particular emphasis on great and powerful.
“Who’s that?” Haven said.
“Trixie. You’ll see.” Louder, Fit said to the door, “Manehattan Police.”
Hooves approached and the door was opened. A two-toned blue unicorn with her mane out of place blinked in the light. Her eyes focused on Fit. “Oh, what a surprise! I didn’t expect to see you here, Sergeant.”
“Detective now,” Fit said. “Good to see you again, Trixie.”
He introduced Haven and Trixie invited them in. It was cramped, but unicorns tended to keep their places clean, if only because doing so was relatively easy for them, particularly for a unicorn of Trixie’s apparent talent.
Fit explained briefly what had led them there. Trixie listened, her frown building.
“Trixie has to agree, getting foalnapped on purpose does sound like something Mirror would do.”
Haven’s eyes went to Fit, as if seeking explanation for Trixie’s use of third pony pronouns. What, did she think Mirror was the only eccentric pony he knew?
“But Trixie is not sure what she can do to help.”
“You know illusions, right?” said Haven. “Can you help us figure out what Mirror really looks like? That could help us find her.”
Trixie tilted her head. “Perhaps. But Trixie has to ask you: do you really want to know? Illusions only give you a sense of wonder if you don’t know how they work.”
“I’m mostly concerned about preventing harm to somepony,” said Haven flatly.
Trixie looked at Fit. “You know it’s the tail band. Maybe a spell could undo its effects from a distance.”
“I was never good with complex spells,” Fit admitted.
“Much as Trixie would appreciate good press, she is not keen to get back into Guard work.”
“A little presumptuous to assume you’d get a glamourous headline out of helping us,” said Haven.
Trixie smiled. “No assumptions required. Any press is good press. Mirror may even have learned that from me.”
Fit nodded thoughtfully. “I still think there’s a chance that she set this up herself. That doesn’t mean we should delay finding her.”
“She’s probably giving you probable cause to search anything related to Acerbic Cure and his family,” Trixie speculated. “Do you have any evidence?”
“No.”
“Motive?”
“Some.”
“Well, that’s better than nothing,” Trixie advised.
“We can’t really prove that motive without evidence,” Haven pointed out.
“Well, there’s nothing stopping you from walking into the hospital, Fit,” said Trixie. “You’re a Guard veteran.”
“Even if I could pass that off as an excuse to be there, once they saw Haven they would know we were onto them.”
“Hmm.” Trixie tapped her chin with a hoof and looked at Fit’s partner, a smile spreading across her lips, an expression that Haven seem to be trying to invert.
“You picked up Mirror’s effects from her room,” said Trixie. “You can borrow them from the evidence locker.”
“Wait, you can’t be-” Haven shook her head.
“Oh, Trixie is serious.”
Haven looked at Fit, who was still considering the plan. “Are you going along with this?”
“I’m trying to decide what would be more effective, you posing as another Lunar Guard investigating Mirror’s disappearance, or you posing as Mirror herself to hopefully confuse somepony into a mistake.”
Trixie sat back. “That...was actually better than Trixie’s idea.”
“Still, thanks for the help,” said Fit.
Trixie waved her hoof. “If you call that helping. It was mostly you talking things through.”
“Sometimes a fresh perspective is all you need,” said Fit. Though sometimes, a fresh perspective went and got herself foalnapped.
Fit asked Haven, “Are you sure you’re okay with this? I can teach you a few things about how to act like a real Guard.”
Haven crossed her hooves. “Fine, but if we’re going to do this, I’m going to wear the dress uniform. I might as well look good.”
Return the Night, or no Deposit
Trixie agreed to do them the favor of playing an extra set of eyes. It took some cajoling, but in the end her ego won out and Fit was able to convince her that she didn’t need too much practice before her show later. The three of them went to the station to get ready.
Bulldog gave Fit the stink eye as he led yet another quirky mare into the police station. Trixie had insisted on wearing her hat and cape, at least while she was out and about around the city, insisting, “It’s good for Trixie’s image.”
“Not a consultant,” Fit said in response to Bulldog’s glare. “Just a friend.”
He and Haven raided the evidence locker and eventually found the contents of Mirror’s motel room. Deep in one of the bags, they found the enchanted tail band.
Haven sat back on her haunches, holding it up. “What’s it like?” she asked, staring at it
“You won’t even notice, unless you look at yourself.”
Trusting her partner, Haven got up and lifted her tail. Fit had already averted his eyes, having seen Guards changing before.
When he looked back, with little fanfare, Haven’s white and orange motif had been replaced by the blues and greys of a Lunar Guard.
“How do I look?” she asked, fretting over the skin appearance of her wings.
“Plausible,” was the best thing he came up with.
She gave him a look and dug back into the confiscated items to pull out the uniform. Haven wasn’t quite as petite as Mirror, but was close enough that the uniform did fit. It covered her cutie mark.
“It’s a little itchy,” she said.
“You won’t get used to it,” advised Trixie.
The three of them trooped back out into the office. Bulldog started, but then cocked his head at the uncomfortable expression on Haven’s face.
“We’re going to do some undercover stuff,” said Fit.
“If that’s how you want to do it.” Bulldog shook his head.
“Does this police department really have so little oversight?” Trixie asked as they left the building.
Fit shrugged. “The sketch artist got promoted to Chief. I’m not sure anyone outside the department really cares how it’s run. I wish I’d known that when I joined.”
Fit, Haven, and Trixie went down to the hospital. In a low voice, Trixie coached Haven on acting as they walked. By the time they arrived, Haven could recite her lines with some confidence. She was Inspector General, a Lieutenant of the Lunar Guard, newly arrived in Manehattan following the disappearance of Cracked Mirror.
“‘Lieutenant Inspector General’ is a mouthful,” Haven observed.
“It adds a touch of realism,” said Trixie. “A pony named Inspector General would know that joining the Guard and getting a rank would complicate things, but would do it anyway for justice. Plus, this distracts the audience with the puzzle of your name while you’ve moved on to other things.”
“It sounds too complicated and risky.”
“That’s why you keep leaning forward to keep them off balance. Perhaps tell them Mirror sent a letter that implied some interesting things. Of course don’t reveal what those things are, but keep pressing until something shakes loose.”
As they reached the downtown area, Trixie sniffed the air. The maple syrup distillery came into view. “Perhaps Trixie should start getting her EUP veteran care here.”
“Seems like a health risk,” Haven observed.
They separated a block from the hospital and went in separately. Trixie took the lead to have a look around the place first. Haven went next, still nervous but managing to keep it off her disguised face. Fit walked in last.
He glanced at the directory, examining which clinics were on which floors. He wasn’t sure where he would find evidence, or even what kind of evidence he was looking for. Some sign of Mirror was the priority, but something indisputably linking Acerbic Cure and Library Long to the graffiti would be good, too.
He walked past Trixie, who sat in the waiting room reading a magazine. She met his eyes for a moment, but didn’t convey anything with the glance. All clear, apparently.
After reading the directory, Fit had decided to try and get close to Acerbic Cure’s office. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do from there, but maybe Haven could lure the stallion out and Fit could search the place. It wasn’t much of a plan, but they didn’t have anything better.
The clinic at the top floor of the building, and presumably closest to Acerbic’s office, was gastroenterology. Thinking on his feet and coming up with the best excuse he could in order to quickly get himself up there, Fit approached the front desk.
To the mare behind the counter, he said quietly, “I...need an emergency colonoscopy.” His face flushed in real embarrassment.
Fortunately, the nurse was a professional and told him where to go, giving him a clipboard with some forms to fill out.
Armed with a clipboard, Fit knew a lot of figurative doors had just opened. Maybe not as many as if he were wearing a lab coat too, but he still got into the elevator with the air of a stallion with places to go and plausible appearance to be just about anywhere in a hospital.
On the top floor, he walked by Haven, who was talking to a mare sitting at a desk in front of a closed door that sat in an alcove off the hallway. Seeing an opportunity, Fit waited patiently behind her.
Haven’s story apparently was good enough and the secretary agreed to let her in. She was just reaching for the intercom sitting on the desk when Fit pushed forward. “Excuse me, do you know where the colonoscopy clinic is?”
“Down the hall.” The secretary tossed her head.
“No, I mean, I need very specific directions,” said Fit. “Please, if I…” his words stuttered as he tried to think of something and he hoped it sounded like embarrassment. “I’m here for an extreme nervous bowel symptom and if I walk into the wrong door, I might just…”
The secretary sighed and stood up and came out from behind her desk into the hallway, though careful not to get too close to him. She pointed down the hallway. “Go this way. It’s the fourth door on the right.”
She started to turn away, but Fit said, “Should I knock? What if it’s locked? Please, could you go with me? I need help.”
Wondering if maybe he could play the attractiveness card, Fit subtly flexed.
It didn’t work, probably due to his earlier story about nervous bowels. The mare shook her head. “I can’t leave.”
She turned back to her desk a fraction of a second after Haven finished straightening up from it. Not noticing anything, the secretary hit the intercom and let Acerbic Cure know he had a visitor.
Fit couldn’t find any reason to hang around, and turned for the direction the secretary had indicated. He glanced up and down the hallway, seeing nopony, and began trying doors on his way.
The first on the left was a supply closet. Fit glanced through it but found nothing to help him. The second door on the left was locked. The third was already open, revealing an empty patient room. Ditto on the next few. He switched to the other side of the hallway.
The first door opened to reveal a small office. An earth stallion sat with his hooves on the desk, reading a newspaper. He was rather stout, and his mane was buzzed. The cutie mark on his hip was of a coffee cup.
“Uh, hi,” said Fit. “I’m looking for the colonoscopy clinic.”
The stallion stared at him for a moment, eyes narrowing. His hooves came down off the desk. “You look familiar.”
“So do you,” said Fit, stalling because he had never seen this pony before. “Did we go to high school together?”
“I was homeschooled.” The stallion got up and put the newspaper down, freeing his hooves. Fit, an expert in musculature if he did say so himself, saw tension begin to flow into his shoulders. The stallion said, “I remember now. You were down at the Midnight Motel the other day meeting with-”
Fit threw the clipboard in his face and charged.
With the distraction, he pulled the stallion into a facedown hold, but before he could announce his police status or say anything, he was forcibly yanked off by somepony else.
Fit spun as best as he could inside the half-nelson, shifting his weight to throw another stallion over top of him. The pegasus’ wings thrashed, saving him from hitting the floor.
That would have been fine, if he was the only newcomer. Fit caught sight of another pony’s hoof speeding towards his face and reflexively ducked. The first stallion was getting up off the floor, and Fit threw him off balance, striking out against the second stallion who’d ambushed him from behind. He used a brief magic hold to flatten the pegasus’ feathers on one side and get him off balance for a throw to the floor.
The two of them down for a moment, he turned to face the rest. It was a unicorn stallion and a pegasus mare. She shot towards him while the stallion charged a spell. There wasn’t time to think, but Fit instinctively ducked, absorbing the mare’s attack and subtly redirecting her directly into the path of the spell. It turned out to be a stunner, and she caught it in the back, dropping her to the floor.
That was one out of action, though probably briefly. Even guards in practice could rarely put a pony down for any length of time with magic. Fit charged the unicorn, grappling and staying low to keep out of horn range. Fit threw him back, but was piledriven from behind by the two stallions he’d previously engaged.
He felt his forehead bounce off the floor, but not much after that.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
Fit woke up in darkness with an aching head and body. The floor under him was cold and smooth. He rolled over, groaning involuntarily.
“How’s it going?”
His head jerked in the direction of Mirror’s voice, though he couldn’t see her. He was surprised and still disoriented, but said the first thing that came to mind. “I think I lost a fight.”
“Sorry to hear that,” said Mirror. “I didn’t plan on you losing, too.”
Fit shook his head and collected his thoughts. If she was here, then apparently they’d taken her, too. Whoever they were. “So did you set up everything at your motel room in anticipation that they would grab you?”
“I was expecting somepony. I was showing my face around town to get a reaction. If they only sent one or two ponies after me, maybe I could turn the tables. But they sent a squad, so I figured I could learn a few things from the inside. And when I didn’t show up for a few days, you’d come looking for me and have enough probable cause to do what you needed to do.”
Fit sighed. “But I walked into it and now we’re both here.”
Mirror chuckled. “To be fair, the EUP thought they were just getting me. Wait until they find out you’re a cop.”
“You really think it’s the EUP?”
“Don’t you?”
Well, Fit decided, he couldn’t think of anypony else who would be painting pro-Solar graffiti and would have sent a crew to foalnap a troublemaking Lunar Guard.
“How did my motel room look, by the way?” she asked. “I didn’t have much time to check.”
“It was pretty well trashed,” Fit replied.
“Well, there goes the deposit.”
Changing subject, Fit asked, “Any idea where we are?”
“Nope. Best guess is the basement of the hospital.”
Fit tried to light his horn. He felt heat, but nothing happened. A quick check with a hoof confirmed that he was wearing a standard issue Guard magic inhibitor. “They’ve got me ringed. You?”
“Nothing.” He heard a faint shuffle of wings. “But the ceiling isn’t very high.”
Fit got up, fighting vertigo that passed quickly, and stretching in an attempt to relieve sore muscles. He walked cautiously in a straight line before gently bumping his nose on the wall. From there, he began to get a feel for the room. It was maybe five paces by ten, with smooth concrete walls. The door was sturdy iron.
“You might want to stay away from the center of the room,” Mirror said. “Broken glass. There used to be a lightbulb there.”
He heard her hooves circling the room opposite from him, though it almost sounded as if she were just out for a stroll. She’d likely been here long enough to have already surveyed the room.
Fit turned his thoughts inwards, trying to remember anything from the past few days that might help. Every detail from the party, every face in the crowd, at the Cop Cavalcade. The ponies they’d encountered since then, in the hospital and elsewhere. Every moment of the altercation on the top floor that had landed him here.
A non-sequitur jumped out at him. He remembered the conversation in the motel room. Mirror had said Tree Hugger’s name, trying to remind Fit that somepony was waiting on him in order to get him to leave the room, presumably before the foalnappers came for her. “How do you know my marefriend?”
“I’ll let her tell you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Just what I said.”
After Mirror abruptly shut the conversation down, they lapsed into silence again. Fit turned it over in his mind. Was it a secret? Was it just Mirror being Mirror? Should he be concerned - about either?
His jumbled thoughts took another sidetrack as he realized he was naked. His usual polo shirt he’d been wearing earlier was nowhere to be found. Okay, maybe they’d stripped him to make sure he didn’t have any escape tools.
But if they’d stripped him, did that mean…?
His eyes probed the darkness in the direction of Mirror.
He was suddenly unsure what he wanted to see. He’d only ever known her in uniform. It would be weird to see her any other way. The curiosity was strong, though. Who was the real Cracked Mirror?
But suddenly the door slammed open, the glare forcing Fit’s eyes to squint. Somepony was thrown into the room, and the door slammed shut.
“Ouch!” said the newcomer. “What’s the big idea?”
“Haven?”
“Fit?”
Yes, it was definitely Haven’s voice. She got up and stumbled in his direction. The bumped into each other and sat back. She kept one wing touching his shoulder, something to keep them together. He felt the feathers. They’d taken her Lunar Guard disguise.
“What are you doing here?” he asked, though regretting the question instantly.
“I came looking for you.”
“Did you tell anypony what happened?”
“I tried to find Trixie, but she did a disappearing act.”
“Literally?” said Mirror.
Fit felt Haven tense in surprise at hearing Mirror’s voice, but she replied, “I don’t know, I didn’t see her leave.”
“Trixie’s vanishing acts are pretty good,” said Mirror, apparently not questioning the illusionist’s involvement.
“Did you get word out to anypony else?” Fit asked.
“There wasn’t time.” Haven’s voice fell.
“Well, Trixie’s still out there,” he reassured her.
“Unless they toss her in here too,” said Mirror.
Fit held his breath. Several seconds passed, and he relaxed. He felt Haven do the same.
Haven sighed. “What do we do now?”
“Let’s start with what we know,” said Fit.
“Acerbic Cure clammed up. I didn’t get anything. As I was coming out of his office, I saw a gurney with a sheet on it,” said Haven. “It didn’t make any sense for a body to be completely covered in the colonoscopy clinic.”
“Unless something went really wrong,” Mirror interjected.
Haven went on. “It was you under the sheet, Fit. I followed them downstairs, but they must have caught on. I don’t know this building and they cornered me.”
“So we’re in the hospital, makes sense,” said Mirror. “Lots of rooms, lots of ways to hide ponies, food, waste disposal, torture tools.”
Fit decided not to think about that last part. What cause would the EUP have to torture them?
“Well, we might be here a while. We should find a way to pass the time,” said Mirror. “Want to make out, Fit?”
“That would be weird, ma’am.”
“Want to make out, Haven?”
“No. Also, I’m kind of insulted to be your second choice.”
Fit used the ensuing silence to roll his thoughts over again. Haven being here meant that the two of them going missing might be noticed sooner, but unfortunately those looking for them might have less to go on.
“So...does anypony have a plan?” Haven asked.
“Nope,” said Mirror.
“Charging in without a plan is kind of what got us here,” Fit reluctantly admitted.
“Just the two of you charging in to rescue me without even an idea I was here or what sort of opposition you were facing?” said Mirror. “I love it.”
“What, after you planned to get captured?” said Fit.
“Wait, what?” said Haven.
Fit gave her the short version of the story.
“So now we’re all just sitting here,” said Haven. “Fit, can’t you magic something up? At least give us some light?”
“They put an inhibitor on me.”
“Oh. Well, I can fix that.” Haven moved closer.
“Didn’t they search you?” said Fit asked in surprise.
“They did, and they found my cuff key. They didn’t find my spare one, though.”
Mood suddenly lifting, Fit stood still and let her work by feel. It took a little while, but the key fit in the lock and she got the magic-cancelling ring off his horn.
“There, that should-”
The door slammed open again.
Squinting in the light once more, this time Fit saw a masked mare silhouetted in the doorway.
His mouth opened - partly surprise, partly to say something that he still hadn’t considered. There was a shout from outside the room. The rescuer’s head turned towards the sound. Her hoof flicked, and Fit heard something clatter across the floor towards Mirror. In the next moment, the masked mare was gone, her cape disappearing down the hallway.
Fit heard running hooves and put his own into motion, charging for the door. One of the stallions from earlier stepped into his path just as he reached the hallway, and Fit’s momentum carried them both to the ground. He snapped a quick punch to the other pony’s gut and turned to face another who was responding to the breakout.
Mirror got to the next one first, her bat wings propelling her body into his face like a cannonball. She kicked him under the chin with a hind hoof, flipping backwards to land on the floor.
“This way!” shouted Haven, gesturing in the other direction down the hallway. Fit galloped after her, unsure if Haven knew where they were or if she was following their rescuer.
The passageway got darker, rougher, and narrower, and it only seemed as if they were going deeper into the ground. However, Fit kept running, long minutes passing. Shallow puddles of water began to dot the floor and and the hallway - more of a tunnel now - stopped being lit by artificial lights. Fit began to wonder if this was really a good idea. Was this some sort of drainage system? Had they stumbled into the sewer? Fit lit his horn to help the three of them along and the kept moving. The alternative was going back.
Right up until the floor vanished completely and he came to a sudden halt.
Fit glanced over the ledge, hearing falling water somewhere below, but his light didn’t reach far enough to see it. He lifted his head, hearing muffled pursuit from somewhere behind.
“Well, come on,” said Mirror, offering a hoof. Fit took it. Haven grabbed his other foreleg.
He stepped into the air and the two of them took up his weight, though only barely.
“Okay, I take back what I said about you being a studmuffin,” Mirror said, beating her wings furiously. “Muffins are supposed to be light and fluffy.”
Haven said nothing, just straining to carry him.
They made it to the bottom, depositing Fit in a pool of salt water deeper than his head. He tread water, looking around at the vertical rock walls in a circle around him.
“I think there’s an outlet over here,” said Haven, flying over to check out the wall. She shifted over to keep her shadow out of the way of his light. Fit swam towards it.
The ceiling dropped lower and lower until both the mares were forced to reluctantly enter the water alongside him. Fit became concerned that he was going to have to hold his breath, but then a slight breeze blew across his nose. A few more strong strokes brought stars into view, and he found himself down by the shore of Manehattan Bay. He turned, spotting the tall statue in the harbor lit up against the night.
The other two joined him and they hauled themselves out of the water onto a cobbled street in lower Manehattan. The shops were closed, but the streetlights were lit. Instinctively, the three of them hurried away from the scene.
“Oh my gosh,” Haven panted. “Mare Do Well is real.”
“I have to say, I really didn’t expect her to rescue us,” said Mirror. “She’s really more of a passive superhero, saving ponies from natural disasters and whatnot, not breaking and entering against violent foalnappers. Anyway, I’ll have to thank her at our next teatime.”
Haven stared at Mirror for a long moment, but then shook her head and said nothing.
She was finally getting it, Fit decided.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
“Where are we going?” Haven asked.
It was a good question. Fit slowed his pace slightly and the two mares caught up.
“The obvious thing would be to go back to the office,” he said. There would be at least a few officers working nights and Fit, Haven, and Mirror could report the foalnapping.
“Why am I sensing a ‘but?’”
“Probably because they took Fit’s clothes so it’s right in front of you.”
Haven and Fit both turned to look at Mirror. She rolled her eyes. “Oh come on, you knew it was a joke.”
Smoothly continuing, Fit answered Haven’s question. “There’s not much to go on. I’m sure they’ll believe us, but all we have is circumstantial. Without knowing the identity of the ponies who grabbed us, it’s impossible to arrest them or directly implicate EUP. We could round up the cops and search the hospital. We might even find the dungeon where we were held. It would be a huge deal. But we don’t yet have a who or a why to go with the what .”
“Yeah, and Nosey would get his story,” huffed Haven, rolling her eyes. “I might be willing to stall the case a little just for that.” She looked at him. “So what do we do?”
“Why don’t we go to a magic show and think about it?” Mirror suggested.
Oh right. They should really see if Trixie was okay.
None of them had any money for cab fare after being stripped, so it was a long trot. Fit could have sent the pegasi ahead, but got the sense that none of them wanted to be alone right now. Getting thrown in a dungeon could do that.
The show venue was lit up as they approached, which Fit took as a good sign. He thought back to the flyer he’d seen, noting the end time of the performance, which was eight pm.
Just as they reached the front of the theater, the doors opened and a satisfied, talkative audience began to flow out. The three of them managed to fight the tide and slip into the building.
Trixie was busy selling merchandise at a small table near the door. Sales didn’t look overwhelming, so when they came in, she noticed them immediately.
“What happened to you?” she asked, taking in their disheveled appearance.
“I made the EUP foalnap me, and then these two decided to join the fun,” said Mirror.
Trixie nodded. “Okay.”
“You kind of left us there,” said Haven accusingly.
“Well, Trixie didn’t know how long your little operation was going to last, and she had a show to do.” Trixie gestured at the theater. “However, I did anonymously report a public disturbance at the hospital, just to get some officers over there. Did it help?”
“No,” said Haven.
Trixie shrugged.
“Well, thanks for doing more than the average citizen,” said Fit. “You also may be called to testify when this is all over.”
“Can you tell me about your escape, or would that make me unsuitable as a witness?”
“I think it would make you more suitable as a potential escapee if they ever found out you were a former Lunar Guard and decided to foalnap you too,” said Mirror.
There was a certain logic to that, so Fit told Trixie the story.
“Hang on,” she broke in, “Mare Do Well isn’t real, she’s a character Princess Twilight and her friends make up. Trixie would know, being knowledgeable about characters and also Princess Twilight.”
“That’s what I thought,” said Fit. Haven nodded.
“Well, I think she’s pretty cool,” said Mirror, shrugging. She paused, cocking her head. “You aren't Mare Do Well, are you, Trixie?”
“I guess the silhouette of her hat and cape could bear some resemblance,” said Fit. “But she was here at the show while we were being rescued.”
“We don’t know that,” said Mirror. “Trixie is the best at illusions.”
“I’m not Mare Do Well,” said Trixie.
“It’d be cool if you were,” said Mirror. “It’d simplify things, too.”
“Well, Mare Do Well isn’t our problem right now,” Fit reminded them.
“Well, what about evidence?” said Haven. “We can make arrests for assault on a police officer.” She gestured to the group of them. “We have witnesses for that. But right now we don’t have anything hard linking them to the graffitti.”
“We might find something when we make the raid,” said Fit.
Haven nodded. “We need to get some help and then go back to the hospital to make some arrests. The night shift at the department might be enough, but I would really be more comfortable with more officers. What about the Guard?”
“We don’t know if any active duty Solar Guards are part of this,” said Fit with a frown. “And bringing in the Lunar Guards will only rile up the faction inside the EUP even more.”
“What about County? You know somepony there, right?”
Fit nodded. “That could work.”
“If you need help, I could just call a Princess or two,” Mirror offered.
“You can’t just call a Princess to help the police!” Haven protested.
Mirror grinned. “Want to bet?”
Fit held up a hoof. He’d already lost control of the case to Mirror. There was no way he was going to give it to the Princesses. “I think we’ll be fine. We’ll stop by the office, go get Plowshore, and we’ll go to the hospital. We may want to swing by the Cure-Long house on the way.”
He paused. “But first, we need to go to the newspaper office. We’re going to tell Nosey that we called a Princess.”
Down at Nosey’s office, he seemed surprised when Mirror walked through the door. “That was a quick foalnapping.”
“Yep, in and out,” Mirror said, without any prompting or previous coaching from Fit. “But you know how it goes, now we have to go arrest them and do all that fun legal stuff. It might get a little heated, so Princess Luna is coming to ensure a smooth operation.”
Nosey was busy scribbling notes. “Who did you say the culprit was?”
“Well, we want to count out the suspects first before we make a judgement on which group a majority of them might belong to. Wouldn’t want to taint public opinion before the trial.”
“Is this still in relation to the graffitti case?” Nosey asked. “Would Princess Luna’s appearance have anything to do with the anti-lunar graffiti?”
“If I told you any more, you wouldn’t have time to get it into the late edition of the paper,” Mirror said.
Nosey glanced at the clock on the wall. “Right you are.” He stood up with his notes. “I’ll just get this down to the printer. And hey, thanks a lot. Update me later, will you?”
He left the room and the others headed for the front door. “Do we still owe him the full story?” Haven asked under her breath.
“Well, he didn’t end up helping us find Mirror, so no,” said Fit. Besides, Nosey probably wouldn’t trust them as sources when Princess Luna didn’t actually show up.
Assuming Princess Luna didn’t show up. Though he didn’t doubt Mirror could absolutely make that happen, he didn’t think she would.
But that aside, they actually needed to get on with the task in front of them. The trio headed for the police station.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
Late as it was, Fit was mildly surprised to see a few familiar faces still in the office when he entered with Haven and Mirror. Bulldog fired an angry glare in their direction that Fit realized wasn’t meant for Mirror but himself.
“Where have you been?” Bulldog demanded. “You were gone all afternoon and I’m still here making up for you!”
“All three of us were foalnapped by a cult,” said Mirror, smiling.
“That’s what happened,” Fit confirmed, not smiling.
“What was that about a cult?” said Chief Sketchy, coming out of his office.
“It’s going to take a while to get the full story out, but we learned that an anti-lunar splinter group inside the EUP has been behind the graffiti around the city,” said Fit. “As you know, they foalnapped Mirror, and then took Haven and I when we were looking for her. We just got free and came here to round up a couple of officers and go back to the hospital to make some arrests.”
Sketchy spent a few seconds absorbing that. “We can’t do it.”
“What are you talking about?” Fit said.
The Chief shook his head. “That hospital is national property. They do their own security and we don’t have jurisdiction there.”
“Are you kidding me?” Haven groaned.
Fit stood paralyzed. The fact hadn’t occurred to him until now. There’d never been a need to arrest anypony at the EUP hospital before. Now that he realized it, probably because they had always handed any rare instance themselves. “That...isn’t right. It’s our city. Nopony is above the law. And if the Guards might be behind this, who are we supposed to turn to?”
“That isn’t how it works,” said Sketchy, shaking his head. “I want you to file your report and we’ll do everything we can on our end. We’ll have to approach this by making a few inquiries and ask the Guards to conduct an internal investigation.”
Somepony in the Guards, if a member of the anti-Luna cult, could sweep it under the rug. “But-”
Sketchy cut him off. “We can’t do anything. There’s a complicated web at work here. Do you want me to draw you a picture?”
“Yes,” said Mirror.
Sketchy was taken aback. “Nopony’s asked me to draw for them in forever.”
“Just show us who is in charge, so we don’t make this same mistake again. We can also drop them a line this evening to let them know to be on their toes,” she said.
Sketchy happily drew out a quick diagram of the overlapping chain of law enforcement and how it tied into the Manehattan EUP hospital. Fit was loathe to realize that Acerbic Cure was on the list. He wasn’t a Guard anymore, but as the administrator of the hospital, he had oversight and probably held a lot of implied authority.
“You can talk to them,” Sketchy said. “I know what you went through might have been rough, but what you told me doesn’t sound like everypony in that hospital is part of this group. If you want this to hold up in court, do not do anything rash. Are we clear?”
He was right, Fit knew. Knowing the guilty party but not having concrete evidence had bitten them again. He bit back a reply and just said, “Yes sir.”
Fit put on his badge and left the office again, still frustrated. Haven and Mirror followed him out.
“We can still go,” Haven said in gentle tones. “Show the badges. Get some public witnesses that we were there. I don’t think they would take us again, even if they did have jurisdiction over the hospital. We can get Plowshore to go with us.”
“You saw the drawing,” Fit muttered. “The Manehattan Police Department can’t touch them.”
“Well, now’s a really good time for me to be to not be a part of MPD,” said Mirror. Fit looked at her. She went on. “So we can’t do anything to them in the hospital. I just have to get them to come out.”
“How are you going to do that?” said Haven.
“I’ll think of something.” Mirror grinned and spread her wings. “See you later.”
Fit and Haven continued to the Sheriff's office. Conveniently, Plowshore was working nights and agreed to come with them. They told him the story on the way.
“This is nuts,” said Plowshore. “They kidnapped cops?”
“We were undercover at the time,” Fit said.
“Still.” Plowshore looked at the drawing from Chief Sketchy. “I wish I could do more, but it looks like County is out of our authority here too.”
“I’m happy to just have some extra backup,” said Fit. “Mirror should be around, though.”
He had purposely not mentioned Mare Do Well to either the Chief or Plowshore.
“Speaking of her.” Plowshore shook his head. “Through all of this, your possibly-insane ex boss has been bending the law to pull leads out of thin air. I wouldn’t want to be you, writing the report when this is all finished.”
True, but at least writing the reports could wait until they actually knew the full story.
Fit led the group to the Cure-Long house. Unsure what reaction there would be to their arrival, he gestured for Haven to cover the back as he knocked on the front door.
“Who is it ?” a mare’s voice asked from inside the door.
“My name is Detective Cross Fit, from the Manehattan Police. I’d like to ask you a few questions.”
The door opened to reveal Library Long. She was, Fit noticed again. Long, that is. More importantly, she didn’t seem to recognize him.
“This is about the EUP,” he said. He added, “And your daughter.”
“Oh my.” Her eyes widened and she called over her shoulder “Cerbic!” She stepped back from the door and gestured them in.
Fit popped a few sparks off his horn, signaling Haven, and she joined Fit and Plowshore. They followed Library into the living room.
Acerbic Cure met them there. “What is this about?” He too didn’t seem to recognize them.
The three police sat down on the couch at Library’s invitation. She and her husband sat across from them in armchairs. Fit began the questioning. “We’ve come to ask you about a certain group inside the EUP that may harbor feelings against Princess Luna.”
Acerbic and Library traded an uneasy glance. “Why would anypony do that?” Acerbic asked.
“We caught your daughter paying a local artist to paint anti-lunar graffiti.”
The two parents looked stunned. Stunned, perhaps, but not surprised. Acerbic lowered his eyes. “She took after the wrong side.”
“Wrong side of what?” Haven asked.
Acerbic and Library traded a glance again. Library spoke, hesitantly, “The faction inside the EUP of which you speak...began right here in Manehattan. It was...not extremist. Not at first. We just wanted the new service to stop absorbing so many resources that we used to be entitled.”
Fit decided to push the envelope. “Were you members?”
“Yes,” said Acerbic.
“Cerbic!” Library exclaimed. She turned back to fit. “Were members.”
“We founded it,” said Acerbic.
Library gaped at him again, but didn’t try to correct him this time. Acerbic went on. “Maybe there was a personal angle. When Princess Luna returned, both of us applied to join the newly reformed Lunar Guard. I was disqualified for night vision. Library was disqualified for uniform requirements.”
“Uniform requirements?” asked Plowshore.
Library gave him a weary look and gestured to her extra-length barrel. Plowshore flushed.
Acerbic went on. “That was in addition to taking resources away from the Solar Guard. Everything was tight for a while. It didn’t help once we found out where Princess Luna had been and why. Some of us were a little sore at the Lunar side of the house.”
He emphasized. “But that’s just how it started. That’s all we did. It was everypony else that took it and ran with it until things got out of hoof.”
“Who else?” Fit asked.
“Isn’t that enough?” Acerbic asked. “My daughter’s already in trouble for this. Do you have to take our friends, too?”
They were already pushing the limits of the informal interview. Dragging anything else out would be more effective under oath.
“I think your daughter is in over her head,” Fit said. “Do you realize that this group foalnapped an investigating Lunar Guard?”
Library turned white. Acerbic gripped the arms of his chair.
“We’re going to go down to the hospital,” said Fit. “That’s where they’re headquartered, right? We’re going to need names.”
There was a lot at stake. He could see it written on their faces. But they gave him names. Fit wrote them down in his notebook.
“Dusty...she’s dating one of them. That’s probably how she got involved,” said Library. “His name is Dark Roast.”
Fit remembered the stallion with a coffee cup cutie mark that he’d fought at the hospital. Interesting.
It seemed that Library and Acerbic had given everything they had to give. The police stood up to leave and the two of them escorted the cops to the door.
“What about our Dusty?” Library said.
“We don’t have a lot on her,” Fit said. “If she’s willing to cooperate, she could probably get a deal. Your testimony could help, too.” Dusty Tome had already been released, but depending on how things went with arresting the other figures in EUP, they might know more about her involvement later.
Fit led the way out the door. He felt a sense of purpose that he hadn’t experienced in months. The case was going somewhere. He felt like he was doing something.
He squared his shoulders as he walked, flanked by Plowshore and Haven. That didn’t change the potential difficulty of what they were about to do. The radicals inside EUP had already shown the lengths to which they were willing to resort.
Fit still didn’t fully understand their motivation. He could understand a little resentment from the way Acerbic and Library had described the division of the two Guards, but having been a Guard himself he would have thought a sense of duty would have prevailed.
They headed for the hospital. Out of the corner of his eye, Fit saw Mirror materialize from the shadows and fall in with them.
“We’re set,” she said.
“Set for what?” Plowshore asked.
“The hospital is EUP property and jurisdiction of the Guard,” said Fit. “So we have to get them to come out.”
Fit’s ears flicked at a faint sizzling noise. He glanced at Mirror, who was just snapping her gold lighter shut after lighting up a smoke.
His eyes widened as he realized she was smoking a dynamite fuse.
Return the Night, or no Deposit
“Should I be concerned?” Fit asked as they approached the hospital. Ponies were pouring out the front door.
“No,” said Mirror.
One of the hospital orderlies saw them approaching. “Oh thank Celestia, the police are here about the bomb threat.”
Fit shot a look at Mirror.
The flow of doctors and patients seemed to have stopped as they approached the building. A stallion with a clipboard and a counting clicker stood by the door. He consulted his notes and announced, “That’s everypony.”
Spotting the police, he said, “Excellent, how soon can you begin sweeping the building?”
Just then, there was an ear-splitting bang and the stone Guard seal over the door blew off the wall and came crashing down, just barely avoiding the group. It would have crushed any of them.
Fit threw startled look at Mirror, who frowned and said, “Okay, maybe be concerned.”
“You didn’t-”
“No, I didn’t,” she said, still frowning. Her eyes shifted upwards. “But I bet I know who did.”
Underneath the seal, some impressively careful explosives work had carved out a new logo, one that only incorporated the image of the sun.
Mirror glanced around. “And speaking of, there’s one of them.”
Fit followed her gaze, spotting the stallion who he’d encountered near the colonoscopy clinic standing among a crowd. Dark Roast, was it? Fit took a step in that direction, but realized he’d noticed another of the perps. And another. And who knew how many more unknown members of the anti-Luna faction might be hiding in the crowd? Himself and three other officers was starting to seem like not enough.
A young colt appeared on the street corner. He held up a newspaper. “Extra, extra! Princess Personally Peeved about Paintings! Read all about it!”
Well, maybe that would help. The police were still outnumbered, but with news about the Princess, now they might have their marks on edge.
And not only that, just then a gasp went through the crowd and a masked mare appeared on the rooftops, silhouetted against the rising moon.
Mare Do Well did a backflip off the roof, ricocheted off the next building, spun around the horizontal bar of a lightpole, and landed perfectly on the sidewalk, cape fluttering.
“How’s it going?” said Mirror. She traded a hoofbump with Mare Do Well.
Fit realized that Haven owed him lunch, but was too awestruck to say anything.
Fortunately, Haven wasn’t. “Uh, everypony?” She indicated the stone disk that had been blown off the hospital and was currently picking up speed as it rolled away.
Fit ran after it, tugging as best he could with magic but having little effect. It was heading towards the maple syrup distillery and he didn’t want to think about what would happen if it crashed through a wall and ruptured one of the holding tanks.
He shouted and the crowd ahead of him cleared away. Fit threw his body at the rolling stone but only wobbled it. It wasn’t going to change course so easily and he was running out of time.
Judging its trajectory towards the curb, Fit dashed out in front of it and crouched, bracing. The six-inch height gave him just enough room to get his hooves under it.
He threw everything he had into the lift, using the change in height to redirect the stone’s momentum. He got it to the top of his reach, above his head, and stumbled several steps on his hind legs before finally managing to stop.
All the mares within sight spontaneously swooned, Mare Do Well included, Fit noted in the back of his mind. It was almost enough to distract him from the fact that if he didn’t put this rock down soon it was going to crush him.
“WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS? ” said a force of nature disguised as a voice.
Princess Luna descended from the sky, landing in a quickly-cleared circle in the middle of the crowd. There was fire in her eyes and the circle of ponies widened as she glanced around. Her eyes settled for a moment on the hospital’s new logo.
“If there were dissent in the ranks, it it is every Guard’s duty to seek guidance and resolve disputes,” said Luna. “My sister and I wrote that very line in the manual. But now that I am here, you may have my attention. What do you desire?”
“Um, Princess, could I get a little help?” Fit wheezed.
Luna trotted over and took the stone from him with one hoof, not even using magic. She hefted it and walked back over to the front of the hospital to rehang it above the door. That done, she turned to readdress the crowd. “Well? If there is call for it, I can establish a royal court right here and now to address any issues that anypony may have.”
Five seconds passed in total silence.
“Excellent,” said Luna. “Nopony has any problems whatsoever. Have a good night and sweet dreams.”
She flew away.
“I was kind of hoping I could get a moment of her time to read my screenplay,” Mirror muttered. Fit barely heard her, already working kinks out of his aching muscles. In the commotion, he noticed Mare Do Well had gone.
“Did you call the Princess here just for that?” Haven said.
“Well, I didn’t think we needed any help with the arrests...”
“Well if that’s the case,” grumbled Haven. “There are a couple of ponies in this crowd I recognize. We could start cuffing them.”
“I guess it would be a shame to go through all this and not get some tangible results,” Plowshore agreed.
There were still only four of them, but that was perhaps four arrests that otherwise would not have been made. They split off.
Fit approached the stallion he’d seen near the colonoscopy clinic. “I’m not really in the mood to fight right now,” Fit said as he approached. “But if Princess Luna had to come back here, I’m sure she’d be even less amused. Put out your fetlocks.”
Dark Roast hesitated, but reluctantly did as ordered. Fit snapped on the cuffs.
The next few hours were spent booking. Police work was mostly about filing papers, and catching wrongdoers only resulted in more. To everypony’s credit, several arrests in such a big case brought the office together to help Fit and Haven get everything done properly. Mirror and Plowshore, not being Manehattan PD, did at least hang around to provide moral support.
Fit didn’t know what time they finished up, only that he was exhausted. The initial testimony they’d gotten indicated that there might be more arrests to be made. Everypony wanted to be a cultist until personally called out by an alicorn princess, and then they turned into songbirds. He hung around the office only a moment longer to file for vacation. After all this, he felt like he could use at least one day off.
“Do you need anything else?” Haven asked.
“No,” he said. “But thank you. And...thank you for standing by me through this. I don’t know if I’ll be able to reciprocate. I doubt you have any insane consultants waiting in the wings.”
“Speaking of Mirror, is she...okay?” Haven asked. “Now that the case is over, I thought I should bring it up. You say she’s always been quirky, but I’m a little concerned that there’s something else going on.”
“I’ve never asked,” said Fit. “But maybe I should.”
“Then again,” said Haven, “She’d probably find some way to dodge the question or throw an even more convoluted idea into your head.”
“It’s amazing how well we know her, but don’t know anything about her, isn’t it?” Fit shook his head.
“Well, if you see her again, tell her thank you for me,” said Haven. The two of them bumped hooves and went off in separate directions.
Fit made his way home. He slipped into bed quietly, feeling the shape of Tree Hugger already there. She rolled over, putting her foreleg over him. Fit let out a long breath after a long day, and finally relaxed.
In the morning, they were both still there. Fit’s eyes slowly opened to the morning light. Tree Hugger was awake, but hadn’t moved. She smiled at him.
“We finished up the case,” he said. “I’m taking the day off.”
“Whoa, awesome. I’m happy for you.” Tree Hugger slid closer and kissed him.
When they got out of bed a while later, Tree Hugger suggested brunch. The day was easygoing, and they could always go to the gym later.
Fit considered the wedding ring in his dresser drawer as he put on a shirt. Soon. It was a family heirloom, and sized for a unicorn, but he didn’t think Tree Hugger would mind. He felt guilty that the case had kept him from focusing on the proposal for so long without taking action, but that had changed. Soon.
They went to a restaurant Tree Hugger knew. It wasn’t crowded on a weekday. The two of them had a seat and picked up the menus.
“How’s it going?”
Fit lowered his menu to see Mirror standing there, sunglasses on despite being indoors.
“Oh hey, wow,” said Tree Hugger. “Have a seat.”
Fit glanced back and forth. “How do you two know each other?”
They both looked at him. “We met at this really righteous yak yoga yurt up in the mountains,” said Tree Hugger. “It’s been a little while now.”
“That’s some coincidence,” said Fit. “Mirror was my commander when I was in the Guard. She came to Manehattan to work the case.”
Mirror sat down put a newspaper on the table, sliding it across to Fit. “Since Princess Luna actually showed up, Nosey was willing to believe anything else I told him, exactly as I told him.”
Cops Cap Caper!
The Manehattan Police Department wrapped up the case of anti-lunar graffiti with the stunning revelation that a faction inside the Earth, Unicorn, and Pegasus Guard of the Protective Pony Platoons, commonly known as EUP, had been behind it. Detectives Cross Fit and Safe Haven worked tirelessly to break the case, personally making the final arrests.
The article went on to discuss EUP’s press release. It seemed the Manehattan hospital would be under completely new management soon.
“Far out,” said Tree Hugger, reading the article.
“So what are you doing next?” Fit asked.
“I’m going home,” said Mirror. She lowered her sunglasses and smiled at him, a genuine, not-crazy one. “I want to thank you for calling me. I’ve always suspected something like this, but couldn’t prove it on my own.”
“Well, I guess I couldn’t either,” Fit said. “Thank you .”
There were so many more things he wanted to ask her. Not just about the case, but about herself. As Fit had told Haven, Mirror might be the most fascinating pony he had ever met and he couldn’t help but want to solve mysteries.
But maybe he was fine not knowing. Fewer headaches that way. Another reason to propose to Tree Hugger ASAP - to settle down.
“Oh, before I go, I wanted to give you something,” said Mirror. “A little keepsake, but who knows, maybe you’ll find some use for it.” Her hoof reached behind her, and then she placed her tail band on the table in front of Fit.
He stared at it. Did she- He looked up. Mirror grinned, fangs showing.
“I was wearing two.” She shrugged modestly. “Tell Haven that maybe she rubbed off on me with being over-prepared.”
Mirror got up and put her sunglasses back on. She waved, and walked out.
Fit sighed. As much as he appreciated Mirror, she was best served in small doses.
“So now that the case is over,” said Tree Hugger, “do you still want a backrub every morning and evening?”
Fit leaned in to kiss her. “Well, now that the source of stress is gone, I think I can get by. I won’t say no, though.”
“Mmm.” Tree Hugger smiled at him. “It’s good to have you back. The anxiety was really messing up your chi.”
“Thank you for staying with me.”
“No problem. I’m totally here for you, forever. In fact…”
She picked up the tail band, and then got down on her knees. “Fit, will you marry me?”
Author's Note
This story has been in development for more than two years, with two big gaps of 6+ months in the middle. It just didn’t come naturally, so I guess I’m glad that it eventually came out at all.
Thanks for reading.
