Learning To Live Again

by Speedy Quill

Rating: teen
Tags: Main 6, Romance, Princess Luna, Drama, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rarity, Adventure, Sex, Profanity, Princess Celestia, Alternate Universe
Length: 115145

A changeling, abandoned to die after the Royal Wedding, is shown that there's life beyond the hive. Laughter, villains, and committee meetings ensue.

After the Canterlot Invasion. a changeling becomes lost in the Everfree Forest. When he’s finally discovered, it will take Twilight, her friends, and even Celestia and Luna to show him that there is life beyond the changeling hive. Follow Shade on his journey through light and darkness as he learns to embrace his inner strength and become more than he ever thought possible.

Enjoy the follow-up:

Faded Memory: The Rise and Fall of Sombra

Published 2019-03-15 18:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-01-23 15:44:43 UTC

Introductions

Twilight apparently hadn’t informed the town about my arrival. This was obvious in the fact that she had us take a long back route towards her place. We finally stood in front of a large tree with windows and a door. Twilight opened the door and motioned inside.

“This is the Golden Oaks Library. It’s also my home. And for now, it’s yours as well!”

A library! I had been in one of these before! As soon as we were inside I dropped my saddlebag. The pain in my back ebbed away as I looked around at the shelves of books.

“Wow! Look at all of these!”

“Do you like reading?”

“Well...I’ve never really done it for fun before.”

I could tell she had a follow-up question, but she was interrupted by another voice.

“You home Twilight?”

I looked up to the top of the stairs to discover a small dragon. His eyes found me and he froze, staring at me like I had just sprouted a second head.

“Ch-ch-ch-changeling!! Twilight!”

“Spike! Keep it down. Do you really think I wouldn’t know if a changeling was in here?”

“Well maybe he was disguised as a table or a chair or something.”

I rolled my eyes.

“I don’t do furniture.”

The dragon began to descend the stairs, his eyes never leaving me.

“Why is he here? Have they invaded again?”

Twilight motioned to me.

“This is Shade. He was lost and hurt. Zecora has been caring for him. And now he’s going to stay with us for a bit.”

“He’s the guest you were talking about?”

“Yes Spike. Now come help me in the kitchen. The others will be here soon.”

I turned my attention to the Princess.

“The others? I thought you snuck me in here so that ponies wouldn’t see me.”

Twilight shooed Spike into the kitchen before turning to me.

“These are special ponies. They’re my best friends. If you’re going to meet anypony it should be them. I told them all that I had a guest coming into town.”

Spike’s voice carried from the kitchen.

“They’re in for a surprise.”

Twilight sighed.

“That’s why I’ve staggered they’re arrivals. I told each of them to arrive at a different time so that they can properly react.”

‘Knock Knock’

Twilight’s eyes flew to the door.

“Horsefeathers! Why is she early?”

Her face fell into her hoof.

“Of course. Never invite the party pony first. Too eager to wait probably.”

I backed away from the door.

“Party pony?”

Twilight cringed as she reached for the door.

“I’m sorry for what’s about to happen. I just thought it might be best to get her energy out of the way.”

“Who’s behind that door Twilight?”

She didn’t answer me. Instead she opened the door and-

NO!! Not this one!

The pink pony bounced inside, with a cannon in tow.

“I brought my party cannon in case you needed to decorate! So who’s your guest?”

Her eyes found me, and I froze. I’d seen several of my comrades fall to her cannon attacks. Nothing but unconscious bodies and confetti were left after that. Maybe if I didn’t move...

“Twilight? Is that what I think it is?”

Twilight stepped between us.

“Yes Pinkie. His name is Shade. He’s a little shy so...be gentle. And maybe don’t point the cannon at him.”

The pink menace moved around Twilight and bounced over to me. I closed my eyes and braced myself for whatever might happen.

“Hi! I’m Pinkie Pie!”

My eyes flew open in shock. I looked at her face and discovered the biggest smile I’d ever seen. Was she honestly happy to meet me?

“Uh...hi.”

“I’ve never met a changeling before well not properly anyways the last time I saw changelings they were attacking Canterlot and your Queen was pretending to be Princess Cadence and everypony was all- GASP!-when she revealed herself and then the rest of the changelings started popping up and we had to fight them because they were being a bunch of meanies not that you’re a meanie that is I haven’t gotten to know you yet but that’s why we’re having a party so that we can get to know you!”

I think I need a nap. I looked to Twilight. She shrugged before disappearing into the kitchen. I was on my own.

“You’re very...energetic.”

“I get that a lot. What’s your name again?”

“Shade.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

She held out a hoof. Was this another pony thing? Better just to go with it I guess. I reached up and took her hoof.

‘BZZZZ’

I jumped back into a defensive stance. Pinkie’s smile melted away as she realized what happened.

“I’m so sorry! I forgot I was still wearing my hoof buzzer.”

She turned her hoof over to reveal a small gadget tied to it. She pulled it off and placed it inside her mane.

“That’s the only one. I promise.”

I let my body begin to relax.

“I’m not used to a lot of this.”

“That’s okay. I’m sure Twilight will help you figure it all out. Do you want to see my party cannon?”

I didn’t move as she pulled it closer. She aimed it at a nearby wall and leaned over to me.

“Twilight never decorates her parties. Lucky she has me though.”

She pulled the cord on the cannon. I ducked to the ground as it roared to life. A shout came from the kitchen.

“Pinkie! Are you decorating?”

“Well that’s a silly question Twilight. What else am I supposed to do with my cannon?”

I looked up to discover that the cannon had indeed thrown decorations onto the wall. How in Tartarus did that work?

Twilight and Spike emerged from the kitchen carrying trays. Pinkie bounced over to the nearby table as the trays were set down.

“Oooo! Those look good Twilight!”

Twilight looked at me.

“I prepared some snacks. Do...changelings eat regular food?”

I walked over to the table and looked at the food. It was colorful. Much more than the roots and berries I had forced down in previous months.

“We don’t take a lot in physically. But my recent circumstances left me eating berries and such. They weren’t bad by any means. Not nearly as good as love though.”

“What does love taste like?”

Twilight and I both turned to Pinkie in surprise. Twilight seemed more shocked than I did. She spoke through her teeth to the pink pony.

“Maybe Shade doesn’t want to talk about that Pinkie.”

I smiled.

“It’s okay Twilight. I guess it probably tastes like what it feels? I couldn’t say for sure.”

“Does it make you warm and fuzzy and like you’re on top of the world?”

I chuckled.

“Actually...yeah.”

“Wow! I wish our food tasted like that all the time.”

Twilight relaxed visibly as another knock came at the door.

“That should be Fluttershy.”

She walked to the door, opening it to reveal a yellow pegasus. As my mind recalled her I felt, I had a moment of dread come over me. I was going to be introduced to the ponies that had helped fend off the Canterlot Invasion. Of all the ponies I could be introduced to, why was it them?

The pegasus entered, giving a nervous smile to Twilight.

“I hope I’m not early.”

“You’re right on time Fluttershy. This is the guest I told you about. Shade, meet Fluttershy.”

Her eyes locked with mine and a small squeak escaped her. I felt a smile crawl onto my face at a snail’s pace.

“Hi.”

Another squeak and she was gone. No wait.. She was behind Twilight. The princess sighed.

“He’s not going to bite Fluttershy. Shade is my guest. Zecora was taking care of him. Did you know he was lost in the Everfree Forest?”

Fluttershy emerged from behind the lavender pony.

“Lost in the forest? Oh my. Weren’t you scared?”

I nodded.

“More than you can imagine.”

Pinkie leaned close to me.

“Trust me on this. She can imagine.”

A rosy color appeared on Fluttershy’s cheeks. Twilight came over, her brow furrowed.

“You’re not helping. Why don’t you come with me to the kitchen?”

She shoved Pinkie out of the room, leaving me and Fluttershy alone. She didn’t make eye contact with me. I wasn’t entirely sure what to do with myself.

“So...you don’t like the forest either?”

“Um...no. But I do go there sometimes...to gather food for my animals.”

“None of your animals are timberwolves, are they?”

“Goodness no! Those are terrifying!”

“I know.”

I motioned to my back. Her eyes fell to my bandages and she connected the pieces.

“You poor thing!”

I didn’t have any time to react before I was caught in another one of those hugs. Was this going to be a regular thing? Fluttershy pulled away after a moment.

“Are you okay? Do you need anything?”

“I...I’m fine. Zecora sent some potions with me. I’m doing a lot better than I was a week ago.”

“Were you really out there for so long?”

“About a year.”

“You must be so brave!”

Another hug ensued. She was crushing me slightly. I inhaled as best as I could.

“Brave. Sure.”

Twilight and Pinkie returned from the kitchen as Fluttershy released me. I took a deep breath as Twilight smiled.

“You two seem to be getting along!”

Fluttershy had a look of concern.

“He’s been on his own for so long. The poor thing.”

My legs began to tremble, signaling that I’d been on my feet too long. I sat down with a grunt.

“I’m fine. Honestly. Though if one of you could grab my saddlebag-“

Pinkie appeared with the bag, dropping it in front of me. I reached in and found one of the vials Zecora had packed for me.

“Bottoms up.”

I chugged the vial, trying not to taste the liquid. When it was empty, I put the vial back in the bag.

“I hope I never get used to that stuff.”

Another knock at the door signaled that I still had a long afternoon ahead of me. How many of them were there? I watched as Twilight opened the door to reveal an orange pony and a blue pegasus. Twilight groaned.

“I told you two separate times for a reason.”

The pegasus flew inside.

“Well what’s the point of that? It’s a welcome party, isn’t it?”

She stopped midair as she saw me next to Fluttershy and Pinkie.

“Uh...Applejack? Tell me I’m seeing things.”

The orange pony peeled around Twilight, spotting me.

“Ah don’t think so Dash. Twilight?”

Twilight backed up, allowing the orange pony to enter.

“Applejack, Rainbow Dash, this is Shade. Shade meet Applejack and Rainbow Dash.”

She motioned to each in turn. I nodded to both.

“It’s nice to meet you.”

Applejack looked me up and down.

“Haven’t seen one of you in a while. You hurt?”

“Yeah. I’ve been stuck in Everfree for a while.”

Rainbow Dash lowered herself to the floor.

“Why didn’t you just fly out?”

I pointed to my back leg.

“Broke this one when I crash-landed. Sprained one of my wings too. It took forever for them to heal without proper care. By the time they did, I was too weak to fly. Not to mention I recently had the leg broken again.”

“I would have still walked until I found a way out.”

“Not so easy when you’re unfamiliar with the terrain. And you try walking long distance when you haven’t eaten for a few months.”

That shut her up. Applejack stepped forward, examining my bandages.

“Did a varmint get you?”

“Timberwolf.”

She backed up, a look of shock crossing her face. Rainbow’s expression softened slightly as she realized what I must have dealt with. I could tell it was getting uncomfortable for everypony. Luckily Pinkie chimed in.

“Come on girls! Let’s get this party started!”

She hopped over to a box and turned a crank on the side. It began to produce noise. No wait... I felt a smile form.

“Music. I’d forgotten how much I like music.”

Pinkie smiled and began jumping around the room. Fluttershy sat down, taking a snack from the table. Applejack and Rainbow Dash joined Pinkie out on the floor. Twilight sat next to me and Fluttershy.

“Do you want to join them?”

“I don’t know if they like me very much.”

Fluttershy draped a wing across my back.

“They will. Just give them time.”

The door opened once more to reveal an alabaster mare.

“Now really! I couldn’t possibly be late. At least not more than is fashionable.”

Twilight hurried over to the door.

“Of course not Rarity. You’re right on time. There’s somepony you should meet.”

“Yes, who is this mystery guest of yours?”

Twilight waved to me, motioning for me to come closer. I stood up, feeling my limbs object. Nevertheless I walked over to meet the new pony. Her eyes grew bigger as I approached. She was scared of me. I did my best to look innocent and put on a smile.

“Hi. I’m Shade.”

I held out my hoof. The mare looked me up and down. The look in her eyes bored right to my core. I felt as if she were examining every part of me. It was intimidating. She looked at Twilight, who nodded encouragingly, and lifted her own hoof.

“Rarity.”

Our hooves touched, hers on top of mine. I wasn’t exactly sure what the next step was, so I lowered my hoof away from hers after a few moments.

“It’s nice to meet you. I hope you’re the last one for now.”

I looked to Twilight.

“Is she?”

“Yes Shade. This is everypony.”

I looked back to Rarity. She was brushing her mane back from her face. I couldn’t help but stare for a moment. Her face had a graceful appearance. Her eyes sparkled like two gemstones. Her mane seemed to flow effortlessly.

“Wow. Your mane is...”

I wanted to say ‘nice’, but that didn’t convey the right thought. What was another word for it?

“Beautiful.”

I glanced at Twilight. She had leaned in close to my ear to whisper. Beautiful. That was the word.

“Beautiful.”

A small smile appeared on Rarity.

“Well, I do my best. Thank you.”

I glanced back at Twilight and she smiled approvingly. Pinkie appeared out of nowhere, grabbing my hoof.

“Come on Shade! Show us what you got!”

What in Equestria was she talking about? She dragged me over to the others with Twilight and Rarity following behind. Everypony was moving in different ways, but it all seemed timed to the music. What was this called again? Rainbow Dash nudged me.

“Come on. Don’t tell me you don’t know how to dance?”

Dancing. That’s right.

“I’ve seen it before, but never tried. What do I do?”

Rarity walked around me.

“You just move with the music. Let it speak to you.”

Applejack chuckled.

“Just not like that.”

She nodded to Twilight, who seemed to be having a fit. I had to choke down a laugh.

“So I’m not the worst dancer here?”

Fluttershy came over with some sort of snack and offered it to me.

“Just don’t tell her that.”

I looked over the food.

“What is this exactly?”

Rarity chimed in.

“Surely you’ve had a cupcake before?”

“Can’t say that I have.”

I took a tentative bite. The flavor filled my mouth and melted into my tongue. My eyes lit up as I felt my soul leave my body for a split second. And then I inhaled the rest of the cupcake.

Rainbow Dash started to laugh.

“I think he liked it!”

The girls laughed and continued to dance as I went over and helped myself to a few more snacks. I sat down and took the whole scene in. These ponies weren’t nearly as bad as I had expected. And they were all being friendly despite my being a changeling. I still felt like they didn’t trust me. Not entirely anyways. I did my best to push those thoughts from my mind for the time being. This was a party. For now, I would enjoy this moment of peace.

I bit into another cupcake and sighed. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to have a few friends.

Binging

I woke up the following morning with stiff limbs. Pinkie had been determined to teach me every dance she knew. I sat up in bed and stretched each appendage, trying to ease the pain out of my muscles. If that’s how every party was, I think I’d have to sit out the next few.

“Good morning.”

Twilight descended the stairs, looking far too cheerful for how early it was. I grumbled a ‘good morning’ and continued my stretching.

“Well somepony isn’t an early riser.”

I shifted to the edge of the bed, hanging my back legs down.

“Can you blame me? What’s the point of getting up with the Sun? There’s plenty of daytime.”

“Exactly! So there’s plenty of time to start your education!”

Oh boy. I carefully placed my legs against the floor, putting weight onto them. Not bad today. I set my front hooves down next and found that I was remaining steady.

“At least one thing is going well today.”

Twilight had begun walking around the library, pulling books down from the shelves.

“I thought we’d go over some of the basics of Equestria to begin with. We can dive into more current fields of study after that.”

Spike entered the room, hauling a saddlebag behind him.

“Uh...Twilight? Did you forget something?”

“The Guide To Common Equestrian Cloud Formations?”

Spike motioned to the saddlebag and Twilight gasped. The stack of books she’d been levitating behind her fell to the floor, scattering to every corner.

“Oh. My. Gosh. I forgot about the tryouts!”

I picked up the nearest book, brushing it off.

“What tryouts?”

She grabbed the saddlebag from Spike, throwing it onto her back.

“The tryouts for the Equestrian Games. I can’t believe I forgot!”

Spike jumped on her back.

“Relax Twilight. You’re on schedule technically.”

Her head turned to the dragon.

“Which schedule?”

“Umm...the ‘If I’m Possibly Running Late’ schedule...”

“NO!!”

She bolted for the door. I sat down, picking up another book.

“Don’t mind me. I’ll just be here.”

Twilight skidded to a halt, spinning around to face me.

“Shade! You- I- We- Ugh!”

I chuckled at seeing her so disoriented.

“How long will you be gone?”

“A day. Maybe two.”

“Is there food in the kitchen?”

“Yes.”

“And I’m allowed to read any of these books?”

“Of course!”

“Well get going. I can handle myself. I don’t plan on making any public appearances anytime soon.”

“I don’t know..”

Spike nudged her back.

“C’mon Twilight. You heard him.”

He turned his gaze to me.

“There’s a basket of gems next to my bed. They’d better be there still.”

I nodded. Twilight smiled and ran out the door.

“I'll be back as soon as I can!”

I closed the door quickly, making sure not to draw attention. I sighed at the prospect of being alone for the first time in a few weeks. I had grown so used to my own company that being around others, even just one on one, had been uncomfortable. Hopefully that would change as time went on, but for now I was relieved to be alone. I put my back against the door, staring at the sea of leather and paper before me.

“Just you and me, Golden Oaks.”

I began walking along the shelves. The books were in excellent condition! I’m sure that was thanks to Twilight. I perused the titles, wondering where to start. Reading that potions book of Zecora’s had reminded me how much I enjoyed the activity. I’d only ever read books to gain information for Chrysalis. Reading for pleasure was a new concept that had me feeling giddy.

I turned to move to the next shelf and stepped on one of the books Twilight had picked out. I looked down at the cover;

The Cutie Mark: Equestria’s Biggest Mystery

Cutie Marks...oh right. Those images on everypony’s flank. I had wondered about those. Changelings didn’t have anything like that. I picked up the book, brushing some dust off in the process. My eyes traveled the room, finding all the books that Twilight had dropped.

“Alright Princess. I’ll humor you.”

I gathered up the books and stacked them next to the table. Did she really think all of these would be relevant to me? I suppose there was only one way to find out. I grabbed the Cutie Mark book first, flipping to the first page.

———————————

I reached for the next book and found that I’d depleted the pile. How long had I been sitting here? I looked out the window and saw that the sun was beginning to set. I’d been reading all day. And I had completely forgotten to eat!

My stomach instantly growled at the realization that I wasn’t reading any longer. How did I not notice this earlier? I trotted to the kitchen and found a bowl of apples. I grabbed one and bit into it as fast as I could. The juices of the apple ran down my throat and I moaned in ecstasy. How could I have forgotten to eat? That wasn’t like me at all. And further more, apples are delicious! I could hardly believe just how good pony food was! I wondered if anything else tasted this good...

Over the next few minutes I dug through every cupboard and cabinet. There were some prepared snacks, but most of the inventory was separate ingredients. I looked around the kitchen and instantly locked on the leather spine of the cookbook. Time for another binge read.

The pages flew by as I took in every recipe. There was so much you could make! I didn’t know so many types of food existed! I reached the end of the cookbook, slamming the back cover closed.

“Time to see if I can cook.”

A few minutes of searching produced the pots, pans, and measuring devices I would need. The next thing was to gather the necessary ingredients. My stomach continued growling as I grabbed the flour and sugar.

“I know, I know. I’m going as fast as I can.”

I threw the first set of ingredients in the mixing bowl and grabbed the whisk. I was really doing it! The whisk was mixing everything together like magic! I grabbed a couple eggs and cracked them on the edge like the cookbook said. The contents fell into the bowl and soon disappeared into the batter. This process continued as several more ingredients were added, culminating in a delicious-smelling dough.

I placed my mix onto the pan in small bundles. They already looked good enough to eat, but I refrained. I didn’t want to ruin my first attempt at baking. I put the pan in the oven and set a timer.

“Ten minutes. I can wait that long.”

———————————

“What is taking you so long?!”

I looked at the timer. Eight minutes to go.

———————————

The timer finally went off and I opened the oven. The smell was intoxicating! I grabbed an oven mitt and reached for the pan, pulling it into the light. A dozen glorious chocolate chip cookies gazed up at me, begging to be eaten. I licked my lips.

“Don’t worry. You’ll all be safe in my stomach soon.”

———————————

I woke up to the library door opening.

“Shade? We’re back!”

I sat up and looked around the kitchen. The first thing I noticed was that it was morning again. The second was the kitchen. It was a disaster. If a tornado could have materialized indoors, this would have been the result. Could I hide it? Doubtful. I might as well own up to my mess.

“I’m in the kitchen.”

“Are those cookies I smell? Did you make cookies?”

Twilight entered the kitchen and froze.

“Wha-? Wha-?”

Her eyes darted around, taking in every stain, spill, and stray utensil.

“What happened?!”

“I might have been a little messy with my baking.”

She shook her head and refocused her eyes on me.

“A little?!”

She moved further into the kitchen, beginning to examine the damage. Her gaze traveled from the floor to the overhead cabinets.

“I had a full bag of flour up there!”

A smile crossed my face.

“I might have made several batches.”

She spun around, a look of disbelief on her face.

“I thought you’d just read and maybe make a hay sandwich or something!”

“Well I decided to get creative after I finished that pile of books you picked out.”

Her jaw dropped.

“You...finished them?!”

“Well yeah Twilight. It was only twenty-two books.”

“I was gone for a day and a half!”

“Well I admit I’m out of practice, but I did the best I could.”

She sat down on the floor, not noticing that she’d landed right in a pool of flour.

“You can read that fast?”

“That’s kind of my special talent. That’s what they call it right?”

She nodded.

“Can all changelings do that?”

I walked over to the counter and began to tidy up.

“No. I was the only one. I had a knack for gathering information. And retaining it. That talent made me a popular choice for reconnaissance missions.”

“Reconnaissance?”

I sighed, wiping up the last of the sugar.

“A spy Twilight. I was a spy.”

She joined me at the counter, grabbing a towel to wipe down the sink.

“So did you spy on us?”

“You specifically?”

“No. Equestria.”

“...Yeah. But I only took in information pertinent to my mission. I never read books for fun. I never got to know ponies. I got the intel and reported back.”

“And now you get to learn whatever you want.”

I smiled.

“Right.”

“And the cookies?”

“I forgot to eat. I might have overcompensated.”

She giggled.

“Maybe a bit. I'm just surprised that you like pony food so much.”

“It's better than the roots and berries I was eating before.”

Twilight paused mid-wipe.

“That must have been tough. Especially if you're used to love. Then again, anything is probably more filling than roots and berries. But still...I thought changelings consumed only love.”

I nodded.

“That’s always been the case.”

“How long has it been since you...ate?”

“Canterlot.”

“But that was-“

She thought for a moment.

“Thirteen, almost fourteen months ago!”

“I know.”

She was speechless for a moment as she stared at me.

“Well...I suppose that your body adapted to a more pony-like diet in order to survive in Everfree.”

“I’ve never heard of anything like it before. Then again I’ve never known a changeling who went that long without love. And I think the evidence in this kitchen proves it's possible.”

"It's an amazing insight into your species!"

Before any more could be said, Spike entered the kitchen.

“Twilight, can I...”

His voice trailed off as he saw the half-cleaned kitchen. He looked at the two of us and frowned.

“I’m not cleaning this up.”

He left without another word and we both started laughing. Twilight wiped a tear from her eye.

"I suppose we'll need to get some more supplies if you intend on eating this much regularly."

I shook my head.

"On no! This won't be a regular thing. Now that I'm more aware of my appetite, I'll moderate myself a little more."

"That would be helpful. But I think we'll have to binge just a little tonight."

I turned to the Princess, curiosity urging me on.

"Why is that?"

She beamed.

"Do you know how many foods there are you need to try? Oh! And I can take notes! You can tell me how each item tastes and how it compares to your old diet. It'll be like an experiment! We don't want to overdo it but maybe we could-"

I put my face in my hooves and sighed. What had I unleashed?

Twilight continued talking as we finished cleaning. I looked down at my stomach with a frown and whispered.

"This is all your fault."

Blending In

I did my best to limit my reading after the first day. If I wasn’t careful, I’d finish the library in a month. After a few more days though, I realized that books only provided so much. I found myself looking out the window more often. The town was busy as usual. Ponies going about their business and enjoying their lives. A sigh escaped me as I stared outside this particular morning.

“I can’t believe it’s finally happening!”

I turned to see Twilight dancing around the room. What had her so excited? I backed away from the window and began looking through the Fiction section.

“What’s got you worked up Princess?”

“I’ve been trying to plan a day with Cadence for ages! And we finally found a day that works for both our schedules!”

I picked up one of the novels, skimming the description on the back

“Congrats I guess?”

“I get to see her this weekend!”

I froze for a moment.

“Say that again.”

“Cadence is coming this weekend!!”

I rolled my eyes.

“Once more, if you don’t mind.”

“Cadance is coming...this...weekend... Oh no!”

There we go. I turned to the lavender alicorn; her excitement now visibly gone.

“So...how’s her attitude towards changelings?”

“I can’t believe this... I’m going to have to...cancel!”

I found my eyes drawn to the window again.

“You know, she could come if I wasn’t here.”

Twilight followed my gaze to the window.

“I don’t know Shade. I’m not sure if Ponyville is ready to have a changeling wandering around.”

“So I should just wait here until Cadence shows up?”

“No! I mean... I don’t know.”

“Don’t give up yet. There’s got to be a way to let me go out, right?”

“But you really shouldn’t use your magic. If you accidentally revert to your original form in front of other ponies, they might think there’s another invasion.”

“Fair point.”

I sat down, thinking over the options at my disposal. How could I escape the library without causing a panic?

The idea that popped into my head was too perfect. I tried to think of other options, but I kept coming back to the same conclusion.

“I think I know a way.”

Twilight’s ears perked up.

“What is it?”

“Something stupid. And reckless. And definitely painful.”

Now she was looking nervous. I shook my head.

“Not to you. Where’s a mirror?”

Twilight levitated one from the bedroom and I stood in front of it.

“There’s a branch of changeling magic that’s never used due to its...permanence.”

“Permanence? That doesn’t sound very changeling.”

“Precisely. But it’s still within our abilities. It’s not the ideal solution, but it may be the only option in this case. And I’ve seen it done before. I’m old enough to remember changelings who actually tried it.”

“How old are you exactly? I’ve been wondering that. Are you around my age?”

I chuckled.

“Older. Not nearly as old as Chrysalis though.”

“Is she really that old?”

“From what I’ve heard, she took over the changeling hive when she was around your age. That was...a little over a century ago.”

“Seriously?!”

“Seriously.”

“I didn’t know changelings could live so long!”

“We have longer lifespans compared to yours, but we’re still mortal.”

“So how old are you?”

“Don’t you want to know what I’m about to do?”

That distracted her. She sat down next to me, looking at our reflections. I turned my head side to side, examining the shape.

“Our transformation magic allows us to take on the appearance of any creature we come across. But it’s only temporary. We eventually have to revert back to our true form. The type of transformation magic I’m about to use however, alters the actual appearance of the true form.”

“So you’re altering your actual body? Is that safe?”

“Not especially. But I have to try. If I can pull it off, I could walk around town without anypony being suspicious.”

The jawline. I’d start there. I focused my energy and concentration on that particular area. I began to tremble with the effort, but felt the magic begin to take effect.

And then the pain started...

I grit my teeth, fighting through the feeling of my bone structure fluctuating. Twilight looked concerned as I grimaced.

“Shade? Maybe you should-“

I held up a hoof to silence her. It was almost there. I felt the magic ebb away as my jaw settled into place. I took a big gulp of air and checked my handiwork in the mirror. My jaw had squared off, making my head a more natural shape. Natural by pony standards at least.

“That was the hard part. Bone structure is not something you mess with lightly.”

Twilight stared in awe at what I had done.

“I’ve never seen anything like it. You actually changed the shape of your bone structure!”

“And we’re just getting started Princess.”

I focused again, the magic flowing more freely this time, and the holes in my legs began to fill in. I felt skin and tissue beginning to form. That forced a few painful grunts out of me.

As my legs filled in, I realized that I should have the proper hooves to match my look. My hooves slowly reshaped and began to look more pony-like. With that alteration though, my knees gave out. I fell to the floor with a groan. Twilight pulled me up as best as she could.

“Maybe you should stop for now.”

“I’m almost there.”

“You’re going to hurt yourself.”

“I’m already hurt in more ways than one Twilight. Let me do this.”

She stepped away and I stood in front of the mirror alone. I changed my ears next. That tissue was fairly pliable, so it caused me a small amount of pain comparatively. I then forced my head to begin growing a mane. Now that was more painful than I thought it would be.

The horn came next. I had never really liked the look of it to begin with, so I willed it to shorten until it was a short stump hidden in my mane. It was painful, but it could have been worse. I almost looked like a pony now! I turned to Twilight with a smile.

“What do you think?”

“You look great! But...”

“What?”

“Well...it’s your eyes.”

Damn. I knew I’d forgotten something. I looked in the mirror again, realizing that my eyes gave it away. I could have a pony body and still not be a pony.

“I can try to fix them.”

“Are you sure?”

“Not really. I could have easily damaged any of the areas I tampered with. And with how sensitive eyes are, I could very well make myself go blind.”

“Then don’t do it! That’s completely uncalled for.”

I sighed.

“I know. But...I have to try.”

“Why?”

I looked at her, feeling the tears welling up in my eyes.

“Look at me Twilight. Do you see what I’ve done? All of this is so I can walk around and be normal.”

“You don’t have to be normal Shade. You’re unique.”

I didn’t mean to yell, but it came out anyway.

“I just want to know what it’s like!”

She flinched as I felt a tear roll down my cheek.

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Help me to understand then.”

I wiped the tear away and took a deep breath.

“I used to walk among ponies during my missions. I’d see them laughing, sharing stories, doing whatever they pleased. I never knew anything like that in the hive.”

Twilight sat in silence as I began to cry. Even with the tears streaming down m face, I continued to talk.

“Every mission made me realize how different our species were. Ponies seemed so happy in comparison. I wanted to bring some of that into the horde. But everyone acted like I was insane when I tried to be nice to them. Chrysalis told me how stupid it was to try being friendly. And how I’m a creature of darkness. I was never meant to exist in this world! Your world!”

My legs began to tremble. I forced myself to sit before I fell over.

“When I got separated, I had the crazy idea that I might be able to start over. But that damn forest was too big. I had to nearly die to make it this far. And now...I’ll do whatever it takes to fight for my chance to be a part of this world.”

I closed my eyes, concentrating on my magic one last time. My body began to tremble.

“Shade. Don’t.”

I felt a strain on my eyes. It grew in intensity until I wanted to pluck them out. Anything to make it stop. But it was too late. I had to go through with it. I began to grunt in pain again, but this time each grunt got louder. Soon I was screaming.

And then the pain stopped.

I didn’t dare open my eyes. I was terrified that I’d discover a world of darkness. Had I made myself blind?

“Open your eyes Shade. Let me see.”

I slowly lifted my eyelids. Light poured in like I’d never seen before. I wasn’t blind. I blinked a few times, bringing the mirror into focus.

“Damn.”

My eyes had changed slightly, but they still didn’t look quite right. I turned to Twilight, allowing her to inspect them.

“They don’t look bad. You could say you have a genetic condition.”

“Ponies would buy that?”

She moved her hoof across my vision and my eyes followed it.

“You seem to still have your full visual range.”

“More than that actually. I think I’m seeing a few new shades of color that I didn’t before.”

“Changelings can’t see every color?”

“Apparently not.”

I turned to the mirror again, examining my eyes at a closer range. The coloring was still original. And I didn’t seem to have an iris like ponies do. But it was a step closer to the desired look.

“I wonder if I could get it right the next time.”

“I swear if you try again, I’ll throw you out of here so fast! That was the stupidest thing you could have ever done! If you do it again you probably will go blind!”

That was a fair point. And the process had hurt like Tartarus. Maybe I just needed to give them a chance before acting rashly.

“Well if I’m all ready, maybe we could go for a walk?”

The alicorn looked skeptical, but I could tell she was weighing the risk. I gave her the biggest smile I could, willing her to agree. She rolled and eyes and sighed.

“Alright! But not for too long.”

She opened the door and motioned outside.

“After you.”

I trotted over to the door and looked outside. There were ponies out and about, the sun was shining, and I had a new body to show off! I stepped outside and took a deep breath. The fresh air was rejuvenating.

Twilight stepped out behind me, placing a saddlebag on her back.

“Where would you like to go?”

“I want to see everything.”

“Well we don’t have all day, but I can show you the highlights.”

She began walking and I fell into step beside her. I felt the excitement in every inch of my body. And yet, as we approached the first street, I felt nervous. What if ponies saw through the adjustments? What if they tried to run me out of town? I began to trail behind and Twilight slowed her pace.

“You’ll be fine.”

The street was crowded. There were so many ponies! Surely I didn’t think my new look would fool all of them? I wanted to turn and run back to the library. This wasn’t worth the anxiety! I attempted to turn around, but Twilight grabbed my hoof. I locked eyes with her, her own only expressing concern. I took a breath.

“It’s harder than I thought.”

She nodded.

“I’ll be right with you. Don’t give up yet.”

I slowly nodded and fell in next to her again.

“I’m not sure if I’m ready for socializing.”

“Believe it or not I was the same way when I first came to town.”

“Really?”

“I didn’t use to think I needed anypony in my life. Well, besides Spike and Celestia. But then I came here and met my friends. Now I couldn’t live without them.”

“I’ve never been dependent on anypony before.”

“It’s not a matter of dependency...”

A stall caught her attention and she stopped.

“Friendships are about sharing interests, overcoming differences, and being supportive of one another. You don’t have to be fully dependent on them, but it’s nice to have somepony you can depend on in a tough situation.”

“Relationships sound hard.”

We approached the stall and the salespony smiled at us.

“Good morning Twilight! Something I can get for you?”

Twilight looked at the table.

“Is that a Phoenix quill?”

“Sure is! I got it in yesterday. I knew right away you’d be interested.”

Twilight took out a small pouch and deposited several coins on the table. She placed the quill in her bag and thanked the salespony. As we walked away other ponies began calling out to Twilight, who responded to each of them in turn. I listened as we continued our stroll.

“Are all ponies this friendly?”

Twilight turned her attention to me

“In Ponyville? Yes. The town is a lot like a big family.”

“Huh...family. That’s a group of ponies that are related by blood, right?”

“Right. But the town is only like a family. That’s why everypony is so friendly.”

“Families sound nice.”

“Don’t you have parents or siblings?”

“I guess...but you wouldn’t know it by looking. Changelings fend for themselves within the hive. Sure I had hatchmates, but none of us were close.”

“Sounds lonely.”

We turned a corner and approached a colorful building.

“What’s that?”

“Oh! That’s Sugarcube Corner. That’s where Pinkie lives and works. It’s a bakery.”

“A bakery? You mean..where they make cookies and cupcakes and other sweets?”

“Right!”

My stomach growled.

“I could go for a snack right about now.”

Twilight giggled and led the way to the entrance.

———————————

Pinkie made sure to give me plenty of samples. She couldn’t believe that changelings didn’t have sweets of their own. So here I was walking down the street with a bag of sugary confections.

Twilight pointed out several buildings along the way, giving a mini history lesson for each one. Our last stop on the tour was a building towards one edge of town.

“This is Carousel Boutique. It’s Rarity’s dress shop.”

“Dress shop... Like clothes?”

“Yeah. Fancy clothes.”

“I never understood the concept. What’s the point of wearing a cloth layer?”

“Sometimes it’s nice to dress up. It makes you feel special.”

“Well I already feel ‘special’ as it is. The last thing I need is clothes.”

“I didn’t say we were going to buy anything. I just thought you’d want to see the shop.”

I followed her into the shop. There was fabric all over the place. Twilight looked around the room.

“Rarity?”

A few pieces of fabric levitated away from the corner and revealed the unicorn working at a machine.

“Over here darling! Sorry about the mess. I’m working on new outfits for the Ponytones! I thought we could use a fresh look.”

She finished with the fabric in the machine and turned around. Her mane was disheveled, and she seemed a little out of sorts. I did my best not to smile. It was interesting to see her like this. She was less intimidating than when she was put together.

Rarity looked from Twilight to me.

“Who’s your friend Twilight?”

Wow! I thought for sure she’d have recognized me.

“Nice to know I left an impression on you.”

She blinked a few times before realizing who I was.

“Shade? Is that really you?”

“Yeah. I made a few changes.”

“A few? You look absolutely...normal. Sorry. I mean, more pony-like.”

“I was going for normal. Thank you.”

Rarity smiled and turned to Twilight.

“What brings you here darling?”

“I was showing Shade around town. It doesn’t seem ponies took notice of him, so I guess his new body does the trick.”

Rarity looked at me again.

“Why did you change your look? Not that it isn’t bad of course. I think you look fine. Far more handsome.”

I felt my face heat up slightly at that comment.

“I needed to blend in so that I can stay away from the library this weekend.”

“Why on earth do you need to do that?”

Twilight chimed in.

“Cadence finally accepted my invitation to come here!”

“Oh that’s marvelous Twilight. But that doesn’t explain... Oh. Oh it does explain.”

Rarity’s ears drooped slightly.

“I doubt Cadance would understand the situation.”

I shrugged.

“It’s okay. I’ll just wander around.”

Twilight shook her head.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. If you’re spotted for any reason and Cadance finds out? I can’t even begin to imagine..”

“Well where am I supposed to go then?”

“I’m sure Pinkie would love to have you over.”

“Are you trying to fatten me up? If I lay low at Sugarcube Corner I’ll run it out of business with my sweet tooth.”

“Perhaps I can be of assistance?”

We both turned to the alabaster unicorn. She had a small smile.

“If you really need somewhere to ‘lay low’, I have plenty of space here.”

She motioned around the shop. I looked around at the piles of fabric.

“I’d just be in your way Rarity. I’m sure I can find another place.”

“It’s really no trouble Shade.”

“But...are you sure?”

“No. But everypony deserves a chance.”

I glanced at Twilight. She seemed just as surprised at the offer.

“Well I guess I’ve found my hiding spot Twilight.”

Twilight smiled.

“Okay. We’ll make this work.”

Rarity clapped her hooves together.

“Splendid! I could use you as an assistant. Or perhaps a model!”

I turned to Twilight.

“Can I go get fattened up instead?”

Feeling Blue

I opened the door to the boutique. It was surprisingly clean now. I pulled the key from the lock and set it on a nearby table. Rarity was at the train station with the others, but had kindly given me the key to let myself in before Cadence showed up.

I lifted my saddlebag off and set it next to the door. I might as well look around before getting settled. There was plenty to look at in the main room alone. There were several fake ponies on stands. I don’t think I knew the proper term yet. There were bundles of fabric set out in piles. Safe to assume that Rarity was planning on using these today.

What caught my interest the fastest was the sketchbook on the table. It was open, revealing a beautiful drawing of a mare in a dress. There were arrows pointing to certain areas of the dress, each with a scribbled note at its end. I flipped through the pages and found more dress designs with annotations. Each design was as breath-taking as the last. She really made all of these herself?

I backed away from the sketchbook and looked around the room some more. I had to fight every urge to play with her sewing machine. The mechanics behind these things was amazing! In my reading of the library I’d found that I had a fondness for engineering.

I heard the door open, hitting a bell as it swung inward. That must be Rarity! I turned to greet her, but found my words caught in my throat. What had happened to her?

“Rarity? Why are you...blue?”

Rarity sniffled in reply.

“That would be Discord. He’s given Applejack and I whatever sickness it is he has. And whatever it is, it turns you blue.”

She walked further into the room, sniffling with each step.

“I’m so sorry you have to see me in such a state. I didn’t expect the day to go sour like this.”

What happened next still confuses me. Rarity suddenly gasped and exhaled violently. Her body left the ground and flew back against the wall. I was frozen in place at what I’d witnessed.

“What. Was. That?”

Rarity sniffled once more.

“Forgive me. This sneezing has Discord’s magic written all over it.”

My body slowly began to relax.

“That was sneezing? I didn’t know it was so physical!”

She glared at me.

“Well obviously getting thrown against the wall wasn’t meant to be part of it!“

Her annoyance shifted to confusion.

“Wait...you’ve never sneezed?”

“I’ve read about it, but no I’ve never actually had it happen to me. I’ve never been sick.”

“Consider yourself lucky.”

She wandered over to a long chair and fell onto it.

“I was supposed to make sure today went well for Twilight. Who knows what Discord is getting up to.”

“He doesn’t sound pleasant from what I’ve read about him.”

“He can have his moments. It’s his personality that I’ve never gotten used to. But, he is one of Fluttershy’s best friends. There must be something the rest of us are missing.”

Fluttershy? Of all the ponies that would be friends with the Spirit of Chaos, I wouldn’t have guessed the quiet pegasus.

A shiver ran through Rarity’s body. I looked around for a blanket. Ah! There was one under the table there. I picked it up and draped it across the sick unicorn.

“Well there’s not much you’re going to be able to do in your current state. I’m sure Twilight can handle herself. And she has Cadance for backup. I’ll bet on two alicorns over Discord any day.”

“It’s supposed to be a personal day for them. They haven’t had a quiet day together since...well before the wedding.”

“That was so long ago!”

“Exactly.”

I sat down next to the chair, muttering to myself.

“I can’t believe I never knew how close they were. It seems like she would have mentioned her at some point.”

“What was that?”

I shook my head to clear it.

“Nothing. Just trying to remember something. Is there anything I can do for you?”

She smiled. It was a genuine smile that melted my insides a little. Nopony smiled at me like that.

“Thank you, but I suspect that conventional methods won’t work on whatever this is. You can just do whatever you were planning on doing.”

I walked over to the table and picked up her sketchbook.

“I was looking at this before you arrived.”

Her eyes found the book and she moaned.

“Oh no. Those designs aren’t complete yet. They’re only partials. They’re horrid!”

I opened to the page I’d first seen and flipped it around to show her.

“I think it’s rather beautiful. Even if it is only half finished. If I understand your notes, then I think I see where you’re going with this. And I like it.”

“That’s sweet of you to say, but it really isn’t ready. I’ll probably change my mind a few more times before finalizing the design.”

“Pity. I thought it wasn’t half bad. And that’s from a changeling who doesn’t understand clothes.”

“Doesn’t understand-?”

She stared at me like I’d grown a second head. A bout of sniffles distracted her and she settled into the chair again.

“Why am I not surprised?”

I chuckled.

“Sorry to offend. Changelings have never had clothes. I guess when you can change into anything you don’t bother with things like that.”

“I’d wear clothes to cover up those unsightly holes in my legs.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Well you got me there. Do you have anything to drink?”

“The kitchen is through that door.”

She pointed to a doorway and I moved toward it.

“Can I get you anything?”

“I should be fine.”

I opened the door.

“Perhaps some tea? And some bread and jam if there’s any?”

I smiled without turning.

“You got it.”

I grabbed some food from the fridge, realizing I was hungry as well. It took me a minute to find a kettle and the teabags. I prepped everything as I waited for the water to boil. By the time I was finished putting jam on the bread, the kettle was hissing at me. I brought everything out on a tray.

“Here we go. Some tea and bread with strawberry jam. Whatever strawberries are, they taste good.”

She giggled.

“You’re very odd. You don’t know about a lot of things.”

“The hive is very different from here. Not exactly a life of luxury.”

“I should say! Especially if you don’t even know what strawberries are.”

She sipped her tea and sighed. We ate silently for a minute, each enjoying our bread and jam. Rarity began staring at me. I swallowed my bite of bread and turned to her.

“What?”

“Nothing. It’s just interesting seeing you eat. I never thought of changelings eating food.”

“Oh? Do you want to see me hunting for the nearest source of love?”

Her eyes grew bigger at the thought. I shook my head.

“I'm kdding of course. My appetite has changed in the recent months. Being deprived of my primary food source for so long did something to me.”

“So you don’t need love anymore?”

“Can’t really miss what you barely had to begin with.”

“What do you mean?”

I sat back as I finished my bread and jam.

“There are literally hundreds of changelings fighting for every scrap of love that gets tossed their way. I used to be like that. Hoping that I wouldn’t have to go hungry for too long. I can’t even remember the last time I ever got full off of love.”

“Never full? So you were starving half the time? No wonder your kind are so hostile. I would be too if I hadn’t eaten in a few days.”

“Days? There were times I’d go a month without eating.”

Her jaw dropped slightly. I smiled, reaching out to lift her jaw back up.

“Changelings can go without food for a lot longer than ponies. It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary to me.”

She recovered quickly.

“So you’ve never had a full belly until now?”

I thought for a moment.

“Well...I feel like there was a time when I had just hatched. But it’s hard to say. That was decades ago.”

“Decades? You can’t be much older than me!”

Darn. I’d forgotten about the age thing. How had I let myself slip up like that? I tried to dodge Rarity’s gaze, but it wasn’t going there well.

“How old are you exactly?”

“Not old...by changeling standards.”

“That’s vague.”

“I’ve never really talked about it. Not even to Twilight.”

“Is it a secret?”

“Not really.”

“Then tell me!”

“Promise you won’t freak out?”

“You’re not a thousand years old or something like that, are you?”

“Goodness no! Not even Chrysalis is that old.”

“So...”

I stared at her for a few seconds before sighing.

“I’m 87.”

“What?!”

“You said you wouldn’t freak out!”

“Well if it had been fifty or less I wouldn’t have! You’re really that old?!”

“Changelings have a longer lifespan. I knew some when I was little that reached four hundred without breaking a sweat.”

“Four hundred?! All changelings can live that long?”

“Well..that’s as long as they survived anyways. I honestly don’t know. I’ve never seen a changeling die from old age.”

She laid there, staring at me for what felt like an eternity. I kept shifting back and forth, beginning to feel uncomfortable. Rarity finally broke the silence.

“You said you hadn’t told Twilight? Why not?”

“Well as you can see, it causes quite a stir.”

“Surely you had other reasons though.”

“Well...I suppose I’m a little self-conscious about it.”

“Why?”

“Well by changeling standards I’m not much different in age compared to you. I never thought it was weird. But as I started to go out on missions for Chrysalis, I found out pretty quick that ponies don’t live nearly as long. All of a sudden my age made me feel different. And not in a good way.”

“You didn’t like being as old?”

“You would think I’d relish the fact that I would live for centuries. But honestly? It just made me feel lonely.”

“Lonely?”

I nodded.

“Changelings fend for themselves. We don’t have families or friends. How would the idea of sub-immortality look to you then?”

She nodded in agreement.

“Lonely.”

A sigh escaped me.

“The only time I ever felt like I belonged in the slightest was on those missions. And even then I still felt separate from everypony. But to walk among them? To see what life was like without the hive? It was everything I could have ever hoped for.”

“And do we still meet your expectations?”

I looked at her and smiled.

“Surpassed them is more like it.”

She returned the smile. Another one of those melt-my-insides smiles. She reached out and took my hoof.

“You’re not alone anymore Shade. You have all of us now.”

I looked down at our hooves touching. She was so gentle. I felt a tear roll down my cheek, realizing that she was right. I didn’t have to imagine anymore. This was it. I was finally living the life I had always dreamed of. Sneezes and all.

Pinkie's Advice

It was pitch black and I felt as though I was being crushed. But there was no singular source. It was a constant pressure from all around me. I was suffocating!

I tried to scream, but it caught in my throat. I kept trying until I let out a piercing cry. As it came out, the pressure lessened. But as the pain subsided, the darkness disappeared.

I was in Everfree.

I felt my chest tighten as I began gasping for breath again. There wasn’t any pressure this time. Only fear. I spun around, trying to find a gap in the trees. My eyes finally found what appeared to be the only exit. A black opening that led further into the forest.

And there were two eyes staring at me from the darkness.

I wanted to scream. I tried to scream. Nothing was coming. I could only stand there in terror as the eyes moved closer. I closed my own eyes, bracing myself for the timberwolf attack.

“You betrayed me.”

My eyes flew open. Who had spoken? I looked at the abyss and the eyes were reshaping themselves. When they stopped morphing I felt my heart fall into my stomach. I would gladly face the timberwolves if what I was seeing was real.

Chrysalis stepped forward from the shadows, her eyes glowing with rage.

“You had one mission. Find out everything! EVERYTHING!!”

My body had frozen to the forest floor, unable to retreat from her approach.

“I...I found out everything I could. How was I supposed to know?”

Her face contorted in a mocking sneer.

“How was I supposed to know?”

She was nearly on top of me.

“You idiot! I could have had it all! I was so close!”

“I-I’m s-s-sorry.”

“Don’t grovel like the others! That’s beneath you.”

I straightened up at that. I felt my own anger beginning to bubble.

“Beneath me?! Since when did you ever act like I was different? I’m nothing to you. Don’t try to pretend otherwise.”

“Aren’t you though? After all, you've survived this long.”

“Because of my friends.”

The cackle that left her body chilled me to the bone.

“Friends?! You fool! We don’t have friends, only enemies. To believe that ponies would accept you only proves that you’re still the naive little hatchling you've always been. I don’t know why I made you my spy in the first place! All it did was fill your head with this silly notion that you could belong somewhere other than the hive!”

I found that my body could move again and took a step forward.

“I do belong!! You’re the only one who ever said I couldn’t! LIES!! All you’ve ever done is lie to me, making me feel like some unwanted creature. The only thing that made me feel truly unwanted was when you abandoned me in this Celestia-forsaken forest!”

“Am I supposed to rescue every changeling that goes missing?”

“So I was right. I’m nothing to you.”

Her eyes narrowed.

“Then I won’t mind watching you be torn to shreds.”

I don’t know where the timberwolves came from, but three of them were on top of me before I could say another word. I felt their teeth and claws digging into my skin as Chrysalis started laughing. But I could barely hear her laughter over my own screams.

———————————

“SHADE!!”

My eyes flew open and I cried out in pain. My back was on fire! I barely registered Twilight standing over me.

“It’s okay! It’s okay. It’s me Shade. It’s Twilight.”

My eyes began darting around.

“Where am I? Where is she?”

“You’re in the library Shade. You’re safe. Who are you looking for?”

My eyes began to focus and I took in the scene. I was in my bed in the library. Twilight was sitting on the bed. I tried to slow my breathing down. My back was aching.

“My back...is it hurt?”

Twilight glanced at my back and shook her head.

“It’s fine. The wound hasn’t opened again.”

I let out a sigh and my breathing began to slow its pace.

“What was that?”

“You were having a nightmare.”

“A what?”

“A nightmare. A bad dream?”

“Are they always so terrifying?”

“Sometimes. But I’ve never started screaming like that.”

I looked at her, concerned.

“I was screaming?”

She nodded.

“It must have been bad.”

I nodded in agreement.

“I was...back in the forest..with..with the...”

“The timberwolves?”

I couldn’t bring myself to say it. I just nodded. I felt my body beginning to shake. Twilight scooted closer and pulled me into a hug.

“It’s okay. It was only a dream.”

I let myself sink into her, her warmth soothing every inch of my body.

“Who were you looking for?”

I froze.

“What?”

“Who were you looking for? You asked where ‘she’ was?”

I pulled away from the alicorn, meeting her gaze.

“I...I wasn’t alone.”

“Who was with you?”

I felt a tear roll down my cheek.

“It was Her.”

Twilight’s confusion slowly shifted to understanding.

“You mean...Chrysalis?”

“She was angry with me.”

“Angry? Why?”

I shook my head.

“Why is she ever angry at anypony? I couldn’t say.”

A lie, but a necessary one for now.

“Was she really there? In the forest?”

“No. I think my mind is just messing with me. The forest and Chrysalis are my weak points right now. I guess it decided I needed a bout of insomnia.”

Twilight covered her mouth, trapping the beginnings of a giggle. I glared at her.

“Is my pain amusing to you Princess?”

“No! No. I’m sorry. It’s just...how do you know what insomnia is, but not a nightmare?”

She couldn’t hold back the giggling anymore. The joke hit me after a few seconds and I began to smile. Soon I was laughing. We laughed for a good few minutes, letting the tension melt away.

———————————

I stepped out of the library and basked in the sunlight. The warmth on my body felt soothing. I slowly stretched my back, doing my best not to aggravate it. Twilight had taken the bandages off for me that morning and had been happy to report that scar tissue was forming. I glanced at my back now, still not used to how bare it looked without my wings draped there. Nothing had been left by the timberwolves to suggest that I’d ever had wings. My back was completely smooth with the fresh tissue.

I finally broke my gaze away and began walking into town. It wasn’t doing me any good to dwell on this new handicap. I had to take my mind off of the darker parts of my life for the time being. I needed a distraction. Especially after the nightmare.

Ponies were milling about in the street, chatting to one another. I passed by with very few of them glancing at me. The alterations I’d made to myself were going over well. Nopony suspected me of being anything other than a slightly odd-looking pony.

I found myself walking in the direction of Sugarcube Corner. I wasn’t particularly hungry, but I found the atmosphere intoxicating. Just being around those sweet aromas was enough to keep me happy.

I entered the shop and nearly tripped over two small bodies. I caught myself before I squashed the two foals at my hooves. They stared up at me in surprise. Once I’d gained my balance, I looked down at them.

“You two should be careful. You’re liable to make somepony fall.”

They just stared at me. I did my best to step around them, moving further into the bakery. As I approached the counter, a pony emerged from the back room.

“Hello! How can I-“

She paused as her eyes connected with me. It took her a moment to recompose herself.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to stare. I’ve just never seen a pony like you before.”

I smiled.

“There aren’t any ponies like me. I’m pretty unique.”

“How can I help you?”

“Well...I guess I’m looking for Pinkie Pie.”

“Oh she should be back any minute from a delivery. One of our guarantees is sweets in your hooves in thirty minutes or less.”

“How long has she been gone?”

“Well it’s been...”

She looked up at a clock on the wall. Her smile disappeared gradually.

“Oh dear. It’s been seventy-three.”

She looked at me again.

“I’m sorry. This seems to happen. Pinkie gets distracted easily.”

“Why doesn’t that surprise me?”

“How rude of me! Forgetting to introduce myself. I’m Mrs. Cake. My husband and I own the bakery.”

“Shade. I’m...new to Ponyville. I’m actually staying at Twilight’s until I get settled.”

“Oh! So that’s how you know Pinkie!”

“Who knows me?”

We both looked over at the doorway where Pinkie had materialized. I smiled at her.

“Just me Pinkie.”

“Shade! I didn’t know you’d be here! I would have gotten that delivery to the right house on the first try if I’d known!”

Mrs. Cake covered her face.

“I gave you the address dear.”

Pinkie’s eyes lit up.

“Oooooohhh! Is that what this paper has on it? I thought it was a clue for a scavenger hunt.”

Mrs. Cake stifled a moan and walked into the back room. Pinkie bounced over to me.

“So what’s up?”

“I was just looking for something to do.”

“Like a cupcake eating contest?”

“Tempting, but I’m not very hungry.”

“Well we could make cupcakes! I sort of promised an extra dozen to those ponies for being so late.”

“That doesn’t sound too bad.”

She grinned.

“Follow me!”

She bounced towards the kitchen with me walking behind her. Where did she get all this energy?

I entered the kitchen and looked around. It was much bigger than Twilight’s kitchen. And there were so many more pans and utensils! I sat next to the counter as Pinkie began grabbing supplies.

“We’re going to make my Super Special Octuple Chocolate Cupcakes!”

“Octuple chocolate?”

Her grin was getting bigger.

“It’s pretty much the same as my Quadruple Chocolate Cupcakes, but twice the chocolate!”

“That sounds too sweet. Even for me.”

“You just say that because you haven’t tried one yet.”

Once all the ingredients were assembled, Pinkie started having me pass them to her. I watched as she created a batter that smelled heavenly.

“So why’d you really come over?”

I was surprised by the question. I looked at the pink pony, her soft smile giving me a comforting feeling. A sigh left me as I began.

“I’m just trying to forget some unpleasant things.”

“So you’re distracting yourself?”

“Right.”

“I get that.”

I glanced at her from the corner of my eye.

“You do?”

She didn’t look at me, opting to keep her eyes on the batter.

“I keep myself distracted a lot. Sometimes it’s just because I actually get distracted. It’s an attention disorder that I have. Like I was late with those cupcakes because I remembered my sister Maud is coming to town soon. And that got me thinking about rocks, then gems, then Rarity, then-"

She stopped herself and took a breath.

"Sorry. That's the common way I wind up distracting myself. But other times I distract myself so that I don’t get sad.”

“Sad? You?”

She nodded.

“Sometimes I get sad for no reason. It can be really hard to get through my day when that happens. But I put on a brave face and smile for everypony. And you can’t even notice the difference between those days and my happy days.”

“Why force yourself?”

“Because it’s better to push through the darkness rather than sit and cry in it.”

She glanced at me, a small smile forming in the corner of her mouth.

“You don’t need to forget your past, but you do need to leave it where it belongs.”

I stared at this pony in front of me. Here she was making cupcakes, and yet as I stared at her I began to notice small things. Her eyes were red in the corners, a few of her hairs were misplaced in her already crazy mane, and she did seem quieter than normal. At least now that we weren’t with anypony else. Could it be an off day for her?

I shook my head to clear it.

“How do you do it? I can’t help but think of the forest. I had my first nightmare last night and it was about being stuck in the forest again.”

Pinkie finally stopped stirring the batter.

“It takes a lot of practice. But every time you start thinking about what happened, you gotta distract yourself. If all remembering does is make you feel worse, then you need to think about what you’ve got right now.”

“And what’s that?”

“Friends.”

She pointed at the batter, a smile forming again.

“And in approximately thirty-five minutes, cupcakes!”

That made me smile too. Pinkie held out a bag to me.

“Why don’t you put in the eighth type of chocolate?”

“Okay. Tell me when.”

I began pouring the bag into the bowl. Pinkie watched silently. The bag was getting close to half empty. I looked at her. She didn’t say anything. I continued, glancing at her every couple of seconds. Still nothing. I tipped the bag up.

“Okay Pinkie. That’s the whole bag.”

She looked in the bowl.

“Hmmm.... We might need more. I’ll grab another bag!”

I began apologizing to my teeth for the cavities they were sure to get.

Wolves and Wings

Unfortunately my nightmare wasn’t a one time deal. It seemed that every time I went to sleep I found myself back in the forest. And Chrysalis was usually there. Sometimes alone, sometimes with half the horde. It always ended the same way though; immense pain and impending death.

Twilight tried a few spells, hoping to help me have a dreamless sleep for one night. It nearly worked. The only problem was that instead of the whole dream, I got snippets. That was one of my more restless nights.

The morning following that particular night, Twilight decided to visit Zecora.

“Maybe there’s a potion you can try. I’ll see what she suggests.”

I followed her out of the library.

“I hope she’s got something in all those bottles and vases of hers.”

“We’ll figure this out Shade. You’ll have a peaceful night before long.”

As we walked through town, I realized that my hooves were dragging. By the time we were at the outskirts, I felt my heart beginning to pound.

“Uh...Twilight?”

“Yes?”

I stopped and took a deep breath.

“I think you need to go on without me.”

She looked me over, concern growing in her eyes.

“I was really hoping you could be there to give all the details. What if I miss something?”

“I keep dreaming of Chrysalis, Everfree, and the timberwolves. Pretty straightforward.”

She stared at me for a good minute before letting out a sigh.

“You’re right. I shouldn’t have tried to make you go back to Everfree so soon. I’ll go on to Zecora’s.”

“Right. I’ll just catch my breath and then head back.”

Twilight nodded in agreement. She was about to turn to leave when her eyes lit up.

“Hi Fluttershy!”

I turned my head. Fluttershy was emerging from town with a full saddlebag. She smiled at us as she approached.

“Hello Twilight! Hello Shade! How are you?”

Twilight nodded towards Everfree.

“I’m heading to Zecora’s. Shade needs a potion.”

Fluttershy’s eyes glistened with concern.

“Are you not feeling well?”

I shook my head.

“No. I’ve been having nightmares. Zecora might have something to help.”

“Oh you poor thing!”

Twilight turned towards the forest.

“I’m heading there now. Shade isn’t ready to go in there yet.”

I muttered under my breath.

“I’ll never be ready to go in there.”

Fluttershy put a hoof on my back.

“Oh I’m sure he’s not! If I’d been through what he has, I’d be terrified of the forest.”

Twilight rolled her eyes.

“Fluttershy, you’re terrified of the forest half the times you go in there.”

Fluttershy blushed for a moment. She looked at me and I gave a weak smile.

“It’s okay. I’ll be fine back at the library.”

Her eyes lit up all of a sudden.

“You could come with me if you want! Well...you don’t have to. But if you wanted to you could help me feed my animal friends!”

Twilight beamed.

“That’s a wonderful idea!”

I looked at the pegasus, her eyes glittering with hope. What was the worst that could happen, right?

“Okay. I’ll come.”

Fluttershy danced in place.

“Oh goodie! Let’s go. We can’t keep the animals waiting for too long. They can get cranky when they’re hungry. Especially Angel Bunny.”

Twilight followed us to Fluttershy’s cottage. At the fork in the road she turned towards Everfree and waved goodbye.

“I’ll see you in a while Shade. Try to have fun!”

Fun. With animals. I guess there were crazier things that could happen. I watched her walk off to Everfree before following Fluttershy inside.

“Woah!!”

There were animals of all shapes and sizes covering the interior of the cottage. I’d never seen so many at once! And there was Fluttershy in the middle of all of them, dishing out food to the various creatures. I sat down at the nearby table, taking in the scene.

“They all live with you?!”

She giggled.

“For now. Many of them were injured and need care. Some live here permanently. I have plenty of space after all.”

I began looking around the room. There were indeed hutches and houses all along the walls and floors of the main room. It was an animal hotel!

“Why do you take care of them?”

“Well, it is my special talent. How could you not care for these little critters?”

“Can’t they take care of themselves?”

She joined me at the table.

“For the most part. But sometimes things happen that require more than rest or special food. I have a number of animals here that have broken bones recently. If they aren’t cared for properly, their bones won’t heal in the right way and could cause them further pain.”

I sat back in my chair and sighed.

“I sure could have used you either of the times this one was broken.”

I patted my bad leg and Fluttershy came closer.

“May I?”

She motioned for me to stick my bad leg up. I lifted it gently until she was holding it between her hooves. She began probing my leg with a hoof and I winced every few seconds. Her eyes grew sadder as she worked her way towards my body.

“You must have hurt it really bad.”

“It’s bound to happen when you hit the forest floor at a hundred miles an hour.”

“The bone doesn’t seem to be sticking out in any odd places.”

“I did my best to set it the first time. Zecora did a better job after the timberwolf broke it the second time. And then there's the fact I still had to walk on it the enitre time I was in Everfree."

“You shouldn’t have done that! A leg needs time to rest and heal properly.”

“Rest was the last thing on my mind.”

She sat back in her seat, letting my leg go.

“I’m surprised you’re as put together as you are physically.”

I chuckled.

“Trust me, I don’t feel like I am.”

“How’s your back doing?”

I turned around to show her. I heard an odd noise come from her.

“Are...are you okay?”

She squeaked a little.

“Oh! I’m sorry. It’s just... I don’t see injuries this severe usually.”

I turned back around to find her wiping tears from her eyes. I gave her a little smile.

“I’m doing much better. I’ll be okay.”

“I just hate the thought of you stuck out there. Of any creature being that helpless.”

“So that’s why you took to me so quick. I’m another one of your little critters?”

She smiled.

“Of course not. But I do feel the need to help if I can.”

I glanced at my back and sighed.

“I doubt there’s much you can do Fluttershy. They’re not coming back.”

I turned back to her and her smile softened. She launched from her chair and flew up to a birdhouse near the ceiling.

“Could you come out for a minute?”

A bird emerged from the house and hopped into Fluttershy’s hooves. She hovered back down to me and set the bird on the table.

“I found him on the edge of the forest a few months ago. His wing had been broken and wasn’t healing properly. I brought him here and did what I could, but he’s not able to do more than lift off for a second.”

I looked at the bird, noticing the bent wing for the first time.

“He can’t fly?”

Fluttershy shook her head.

“He’s lived here ever since. It’s not safe for him out there.”

I leaned down until my head was against the table.

“I understand little guy. I can’t fly either. I guess we’re just a couple of sorry, flightless critters.”

“You’re wrong about that.”

I looked up at Fluttershy.

“What was that?”

“You’re wrong. You’re not sorry critters. Or at least not this bird. He doesn’t feel sorry for himself. Sure he can’t fly anymore, but he’s learned to adapt.”

“That’s nice for him.”

“You know you can do the same.”

“I doubt that.”

Fluttershy frowned, her brow furrowing. She got right in my face, literally an inch from our noses touching.

“If this little bird can learn how to live without his wings, then so can you!”

I wanted to back up, but I was still in my chair. I couldn’t move out of the way of the frustrated pegasus.

“Well it’s easy enough for him! He gets to live here where he can be cared for.”

“And what is Twilight doing exactly?! Just giving you friendship advice?!”

She had a point. I wasn’t too different from that bird. He had Fluttershy to care for him, and I had Twilight for the time being. I straightened up as Fluttershy withdrew. She brushed her mane back and sighed.

“As I see it, you can live your life one of two ways; as a changeling or as a wingless changeling.”

I cocked my head to one side.

“What’s the difference?”

“Well a wingless changeling would just sit around moping about what it lost and never let go of the pain.”

Ouch.

“But I'm sure a changeling wouldn’t be defined by his disability and would live life to its fullest.”

I stared at Fluttershy. I couldn’t believe how blunt she’d been. Was this really the same quiet pony I’d met my first day in Ponyville?

“You really don’t pull your punches, do you?”

She blushed a little.

“I’m sorry. But I would hate to see you waste your potential like that. You deserve to live a normal life.”

“Thank you Fluttershy. Who knew you had an assertive side?”

“Oh my! Was I too forward?”

I smiled. She was right. I had been feeling sorry for myself for far too long. I had to learn to deal with this.

———————————

Zecora had given Twilight a small vial. Apparently it was something to help ease my night. That was as much as the zebra would say.

I uncorked the vial and nearly keeled over. Couldn’t she brew a potion that smelled nice for a change? I took a deep breath and threw the contents to the back of my throat as fast as I could. I nearly gagged on the fumes alone.

“You okay Shade?”

Twilight appeared at the top of the stairs. I nodded as I caught my breath.

“Yeah. Just dying a little.”

She smiled.

“I never liked the taste of potions either. I hope that Zecora’s helps.”

“Well I’ll find out in a few minutes.”

“I’ll give you some peace and quiet then. Goodnight Shade.”

“Goodnight Twilight.”

With that she disappeared back into her room. I climbed under the covers and settled in for the night. Nothing left to do but wait for sleep to come. I wondered how long the potion would-

-take....

I looked around at my surroundings. I was already back in Everfree. So much for a dreamless sleep I guess.

A cracking twig alerted me to the arrival of something. I spun around and found myself facing down three timberwolves.

“This isn’t right... Where’s Chrysalis?”

The timberwolves began to advance. I backed up towards the edge of the clearing.

“It’s not supposed to happen this fast!”

They were closing in.

“I was supposed to actually get some sleep for once! That’s all I wanted!”

They were looming over me. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I didn’t know how many more times I could relive this. I closed my eyes, praying for it to be over already.

“ENOUGH!!”

I felt the earth shake. Was that Chrysalis? I opened one eye to peek. Both eyes flew open as I discovered that the timberwolves were gone! I looked around the clearing for the owner of the voice I’d heard.

“Hello?”

Nopony was there. And yet...I get as though I was being watched. I peered into the trees, trying to separate shadow from reality. My eyes finally found something out of place.

There was a pony hidden in the shadows.

I could barely make them out, but it was definitely a pony. I took a step forward.

“Thank you.”

No response. I sat down, hoping they'd emerge from the darkness.

“I’ve never seen you here before. Normally it’s Chrysalis sicking the timberwolves on me. I’ve never had anypony chase them off before.”

Still nothing. Then again this was all just a dream. Perhaps it manufactured a savior of some kind and Zecora’s potion had helped it come forward.

The shape moved in the shadows, staying concealed.

“I’ve not seen you before. And you’re not a pony.”

“Well..no. I’m a changeling.”

“I do not govern the dreams of changelings.”

“Govern the- Who are you?”

“I think it is I who should be asking you that question.”

“My name is Shade.”

“And what brought about these nightmares?”

“I’m...reliving a memory.”

“You were attacked by timberwolves?”

“Yes.”

“And your Queen was there?”

“No. She wasn’t. That’s a whole different story.”

“And where are you now?”

“Well as you can see, we’re in Everfree.”

“Not this dreamscape. Where are you sleeping?”

“Oh. In my bed in the library.”

“Library?”

“Yeah. Twilight’s library... Why would my dream ask me these questions? Surely you’d know all this since you’re in my head.”

“I am not part of your dream Shade. I’m a living pony who has been called to you. Your dream put off an aura I’ve not seen before. I came to investigate.”

Wait... This was a real pony?!

I took a step forward.

“Who are you? Can you help me? I’ve been having these nightmares for a while now. Zecora gave me a potion that was supposed to help. Maybe that’s why you’re here!”

“Of course that’s why I’m here. The potion must have opened your mind to my part of the dream world. And now I can come and go as I please.”

“No! Don’t go! What if they come back?”

“The timberwolves will not bother you again tonight Shade. That I can promise you.”

I saw the pony shift again, disappearing further into the forest. I ran forward to the edge of the clearing.

“Wait!”

The pony didn’t stop. I saw a flash of light and they were gone. I stood there in silence, not even realizing that the forest was melting away. Soon I was in the black void. My eyelids grew heavy, making it impossible to stay awake within my own dream.

I opened my eyes to find Twilight sitting on the edge of my bed.

“You were moaning a little. Did you still have a bad dream?”

I stared at her for a few seconds, trying to remember what had happened.

“I...I don’t think so.”

She smiled.

“That’s good. I’m glad you got some rest. I’ll go get breakfast ready.”

She left for the kitchen and I sat up in bed. My thoughts dwelt on the mysterious pony from my dream. Zecora had opened my dreams to them on purpose. So it couldn’t be a bad thing, right? I looked out the window at the rising sun, wondering if I’d ever see that pony again.

A Helping Hoof

As the days carried on I found more activities to fill my time. I would help Fluttershy with her animals, though I always opted out if she needed to go gather food in the forest. She was more than understanding.

Sometimes I’d go hang out with Pinkie and learn how to make something sweet. She seemed to have taken to me in a way she hadn’t with the others. She tended to be quiet. Well...quieter. I think she found comfort in having someone to relax around. A friend she didn’t have to put the smile on for 100% of the time.

When Rainbow Dash learned that I liked reading, she introduced me to the Daring Do series. Of course this suggestion came after several minutes of being called a ‘bookworm’ and an ‘egghead’. She seemed shocked when I read the whole series in a day. Her shock turned to excitement though as we began swapping theories of what Daring Do might be hunting for next.

Twilight convinced me to learn how to buck apples from Applejack. That had been a long, tiring day. But her family fed me a huge dinner after. It was my first time really seeing what a family was like. Families seem to be noisy, argue about silly things, and hug a lot. If the Apples were the example, I think I liked the idea of a family.

Rarity conned me into being a model for her when she began working on some clothes for stallions. I had to stand in the middle of the room on a pedestal while she threw fabric on me.

Even as I was beginning to settle into Ponyville, I was still plagued by my nightmares. I kept looking for that pony again, but never saw them. There were times when the timberwolves vanished suddenly though. I knew my visitor must be nearby, but they never approached.

Many nights I had to deal with the terror. I’d had Twilight start casting a spell on me to mute my voice at night so I didn’t wake up half the town. So I’d wake up most nights silently screaming.

Worse than the screaming though, was the havoc these nightmares were having on my sleep schedule. I was getting less sleep as the days went by. Even with my visitor helping, I was finding it harder to stay awake. I’d been starting to nod off while reading a lot.

The sleep deprivation got to the point where I felt like I was always in a dream. My vision was growing hazy around the edges, my coordination was off, and my entire body felt numb.

Today I was walking toward Carousel Boutique to help Rarity. At least...I was trying. It felt like I wasn’t even controlling my own body at this point. And to make matters worse, my eyelids didn’t want to remain open. If I wasn’t careful, I was going to collapse in the street.

And that’s when I bumped into Rarity. LITERALLY.

“Excuse you! Can’t you keep your eyes on the-“

She turned around and locked eyes with me...I think. Her expression changed from annoyed to surprised.

“Oh Shade! I didn’t realize...”

Her sentence trailed off as she looked me over.

“What’s wrong dear?”

I believe I tried to say ‘I’m sorry Rarity. I guess I’m too tired today.’ What came out though...

“ImsoorRary. Itotertood.”

Was she getting taller? No... I was falling to one side.

Rarity stopped me from hitting the cobblestones and lifted me back up.

“Goodness Shade, you’re exhausted! Why aren’t you at home asleep?”

“Nooslee. Babdreemys.”

Even as I went cross-eyed, I could tell she was becoming concerned.

“That’s it. You’re coming with me right now.”

“Yesh. Lezgoomakclots.”

I tried to get my feet firmly planted in the ground again. That worked for about three steps. I think Rarity struggled with my weight because after a couple minutes, my body began to float. Was I dreaming? No wait... In the few seconds my vision focused, I saw Rarity’s horn lit up with magic. She was carrying me along behind her, like a sack of groceries.

———————————

The next thing I remember was waking up. I hadn’t had any dreams. Then again my brain had had no sleep either. It probably couldn’t waste the energy on producing the usual nightmares.

I slowly looked around. I was in the boutique. Rarity had set me down on her lounge. I sat up and stretched.

“Don’t you dare move!”

I froze mid-stretch. Rarity was off to one side at her sewing machine. How did she know I was awake? I relaxed my body, finishing the stretch.

“What did I say?”

Frozen again, but at least in a more comfortable position. I waited as Rarity finished up her current work. The machine stopped and she turned around to me.

“Now. Where would you like to start?”

“Start?”

“Don’t be smart with me Shade. You might get away with that with the others, but I won’t have you brushing me off on this. Now how long has it been since you’ve slept?”

I sat forward on the lounge.

“I mean...technically I slept last night.”

“For how long?”

“A good...thirty minutes.”

“And before then?”

“About the same the night before. Give or take ten minutes.”

Her horn lit up and a notepad and quill flew to her. She began scribbling something.

“How long have your nightmares been happening?”

“How...how do you know about those?”

“You told me earlier. Though I’m sure you don’t remember. Now how long?”

“Um....a few weeks. Maybe a month.”

Her scribbling stopped.

“So you’re saying that you’ve been operating on two nights worth of sleep for an entire month?!”

“I guess?”

She set the notepad and quill down as she stood up.

“You’re going to kill yourself if you keep this up. In fact, you should probably be dead already!”

“I’ll take that over the nightmares.”

She sighed as she approached me.

“May I ask what exactly is keeping you up like this?”

She sat on the edge of the lounge, her eyes meeting mine. I stared at those eyes for a few seconds. They were filled with sternness and concern. I finally looked away and sighed.

“I keep reliving the timberwolf attack. And I keep dreaming that Chrysalis is the one making them attack me.”

“Is that all?”

My head whipped around to her, anger flaring in my chest.

“What do you mean ‘is that all’?!”

“I mean is that all you dream about? Or is there more?”

The anger dissolved. A simple misunderstanding. I took a deep breath.

“Sometimes it’s the horde that attacks me. Sometimes it’s Chrysalis herself. Either way I’m always left bleeding out in Everfree.”

Rarity shifted her position, turning her body towards me more.

“So you’d rather kill yourself through sleep deprivation than be killed in your dreams?”

“Well...I hadn’t really thought it through.”

“Obviously.”

“Well Tartarus Rarity! What would you do?”

“I’d sleep! Even if I had to relive the worst day of my life over and over again!”

What I said next is something I’d regret for a long time to come.

“You only say that because your worst day was probably getting a hemline wrong.”

I didn’t even see the slap coming. It connected with my cheek so quickly that it took me a moment to register what had happened. I looked at the unicorn in shock. She glared at me with an anger I’d never seen in those beautiful eyes.

“You don’t know me as well as you think. Maybe I’ve not been attacked and had my body shredded like confetti, but I have had enough dark experiences in my life that I won’t tolerate your offensive comments!”

I rubbed my cheek as her words tore into me. I knew she could be dramatic, but this was something entirely different. And she was right, I’d gone too far.

I stood up and walked towards the exit.

“And where do you think you’re going?”

I stopped to look over my shoulder.

“I assume you don’t want me here anymore?”

“Did I say that?”

“....No.”

“Then get back over here. You’re not leaving until we’ve sorted out your sleeping problem.”

I stared at her in disbelief as she patted her hoof on the lounge.

“Do you want my help or not?”

I slowly turned around.

“That depends. Are you going to hit me again?”

“Do you plan on saying something stupid again?”

I stared at her, weighing my options. I took a deep breath and shook my head. She smiled and pat the lounge again. I returned to my seat, making sure to keep an eye on her hooves.

“So how are you going to help me?”

“What have you done in the past to try to sleep?”

“Reading and music. Twilight’s tried a few sleeping spells. And Zecora gave me a couple potions. None of them really helped me to stop the dreams.”

“So they didn’t help you to stay asleep?”

“Well once the dreams hit the bad point I wake up.”

“So you’re hoping for something that will keep the dreams at bay?”

“That would be best.”

“It would also be impossible. Dreams can’t be suppressed so easily. Even if you know the proper spells, they can still leak into your mind. Especially the strong ones like yours.”

“So that’s it? I’m screwed no matter what?”

“Is it a safe guess that you’ve been pretty anxious whenever you go to sleep?”

“More like terrified, but yeah.”

“Let’s focus on that problem. If you go to bed in that state, it will only invite the negative feelings forward.”

“So how do I keep calm?”

She smiled.

“Have you ever tried meditation?”

“Meditation? No. I’ve read about it a little, but it sounded like just a bunch of breathing excercises.”

“You’re not wrong, but you’re also not right. There’s far more to it than that. Here. Cross your back legs like this.”

She shifted her legs around. I pulled mine up and copied the position, wincing a little as I folded my bad leg.

“Now let your hooves rest on your knees and close your eyes.”

I followed the instructions, wondering exactly where this was going.

“Take a deep breath.”

Okay...

“Let it out.”

Done.

“In again. And out again.”

I did this several times. Just as I thought; breathing exercises.

“Now picture this with me. You’re sitting on a cloud.”

Okay.

“The cloud is trying to lift you up, but it senses that something is weighing you down.”

I cracked an eye open.

“Really?”

Her eyes remained closed.

“Do it.”

“Okay, okay.”

I closed my eye and imagined the cloud again. It was fluffy.

“Now imagine that all of your negative feelings are pooling in front of you. Fear, doubt, anger, sadness. All of it pooling in a puddle.”

Pretty big puddle.

“These feelings begin to take on a shape. A sphere. A solid sphere of all of you negative emotions.”

Oddly enough, I could picture it. The black pool was rising, morphing itself into an orb. A dark orb that radiated negativity.

“Now push it over the edge of the cloud.”

I reached out and pushed it. I watched the orb drop out of view. A shiver ran through my body. I felt lighter all of a sudden, as if the weight I’d just pushed away was real.

“And now the cloud lifts you up into the sunlight.”

I felt it! I could feel the warmth of the Sun! I could feel all of my fear and anxiety melt away for the first time in...I don’t know how long!

My eyes flew open. Rarity was staring at me with a small smile. She reached forward to me and ran her hoof along my face. I hadn’t even realized that there were tears rolling down my cheeks. She wiped them away and stood up.

“I think you’ve had a breakthrough. Not bad for your first meditation.”

The tears were still coming. I hadn’t felt this peaceful in ages, if ever. I stood up and pulled Rarity into a hug. It was the first time I’d ever given a hug of my own. I felt her hooves wrap around me and my embrace got even stronger.

“Thank you Rarity.”

“It was nothing.”

I pulled away, wiping the tears from my cheeks.

“It was everything.”

I don’t know what possessed me to do it, but I leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. I’d read about kisses before. For the gift she’d given me though, I thought it was within reason. But I didn’t think that I’d actually ever do something like that.

Rarity held a hoof up to her cheek. She seemed shocked, but not angry. In fact, I think she might have been blushing.

I thanked her again and made for the exit. For the first time in forever, I wasn’t dreading going to sleep.

Aftermath

Tirek. A name I'd only ever heard when I was a hatchling. The older changelings had told his story countless times to the younger generations. I had always assumed him a myth. There was hardly anything about him in books.

So, when Twilight announced the centaur was roaming the country and stealing magic, I found it a hard pill to swallow at first. I knew there was something up when she said Discord was being sought for help. If Celestia was willing to ask that creature for help, it must be dire. And it meant Tirek was actually real. It sent a shiver down my spine thinking of the being I'd heard of in stories.

When Twilight returned late one evening, I knew things were even worse. Not much can rouse me from sleep, but the mixture of emotions coming off Twilight that night was palpable. Even though changelings primarily feast on love, we can still taste and sense other emotions as well. And Twilight was a smorgasbord that could wake up even the soundest of sleeping changelings.

I cracked an eye open to see her walking through the library. She was twitching like crazy. I listened to her and Spike exchange words before she disappeared to her bedroom. A minute later the Sun was suddenly up. That set off all kinds of alarms in my head.

I tried to ask her about it, but she feigned being busy and left the library via blasting the door into oblivion. Yeah...that was normal...

I decided to take a page from Pinkie's book and distract myself. Twilight was obviously doing something to help the current situation and I would trust her judgement. Even if she was acting sketchy.

The town was waking up now and shops were beginning to open. I decided I'd go grab breakfast out.

"Some pancakes sound lovely."

The local cafe outdid themselves and I walked away full and happy. The illusion of happiness disappeared quickly as Rarity ran up to me.

"Shade! You need to get inside!"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing at the moment. But Twilight wanted us to tell everypony to stay indoors. She was acting rather odd."

I nodded in understanding.

"Something is up. I'll head for the library."

"Oh, that's so far though. I think it would be better if you got indoors immediately. Why don't you go to the Boutique?"

"Are you sure? I don't want-"

"How many times have I told you you're not imposing?"

I grinned and nodded.

"Alright. But you and the others better stay safe."

"We always do, darling. Even when we're in danger."

She raced off toward another building, leaving me alone. I went the few blocks to the Boutique and settled in for the upcoming chaos. Or what I expected would be.

I wandered around looking at Rarity's current work. There were some excellent designs. As I walked around the main room, I noticed fabric strewn about. I began to roll it up into neat piles. Then I remembered the last time I'd tried to help tidy up. I'd gotten an earful for disrupting the 'fashion process'. I quickly rearranged the fabric back to where it was. Tirek sounded scary, but I didn't want to mess with Rarity.

Calm was what I needed. And what better way to stay calm than tea? I entered the kitchen and put the kettle on the stove. An image of Rarity and the girls popped into my head at that moment. I whispered under my breath.

"Please stay safe..."

That's when I heard the explosion.

I spun around and ran towards the front door. I made it halfway before the shockwave hit and knocked me to the floor. What in Tartarus had just happened?!

I got to my hooves and opened the front door.

Another earth-shattering sound hit my eardrums followed by more shockwaves.

"Ok then. The world might be ending. Nothing to worry about, right?"

I made my way back into town, expecting ponies to be running for the hills. To my shock, the streets were empty. Were ponies really just waiting this out?!

I rounded a corner and tripped over my hooves as another shockwave hit. Whatever was happening wasn't in town. That was good at least, right?

I got back to my hooves, noticing something odd. There was a book sitting on the ground. A library book. And it was slightly charred. I looked around the street and saw more books and scrolls.

And then my eyes found Golden Oaks...

I fell to my knees, not knowing how to react. It was just...gone. That magnificent tree had been reduced to splinters and a stump.

I sat there for what felt like an age. The shockwaves had stopped. Perhaps whatever was happening was finally over...

Fighting back tears, I stood up and began walking toward the library. I found my saddlebag along the way and began using it to pick up the remnants in the street. It was only a few books and papers, but I couldn't bring myself to leave them on the ground.

I walked into what was left of Golden Oaks. It wasn't much. everything above the ground was gone. The floor was charred and burned beyond repair. A couple of shelves were attached to what was left of one wall, but quickly fell as soon as I looked at them. There were no books within the tree's remains. The sole survivors were in my bag.

I sat down and let the tears come. Where was Twilight? Spike? The girls?

As if in answer to my plea, a brilliant light lit up the sky. I covered my eyes as they were bombarded with every color of the rainbow. What was happening now?

Having learned from the first round, I stayed put this time, waiting for more explosions and shockwaves.

But none came.

I opened my eyes after a minute to find a wave of color washing across the sky. It was unlike anything I'd ever seen before!

And then the shockwave hit. I fell to the floor, waiting for something to explode. This was even worse than all the others! My eyes were jostled open as I lay on the floor. And as I saw the world shaking around me, I also saw something rising above everything else. Was it Tirek?

The shaking stopped and all the colors and lights dissipated. I could see clearly now. It wasn't Tirek! It was a castle!! A giant castle had appeared at the edge of town!

I slowly stood up and left the ruins of Golden Oaks. Other ponies were appearing as well, all of them pointing at the castle. We all made our way towards it, curious to find out what was happening.

I looked up at the doors to the castle.

“This grew out of that box you had?!”

Twilight nodded.

“I can’t believe it either. But that’s what happened.”

I turned to her.

“So...you’ll be living here now I guess...”

She pulled me into a quick hug.

“You know you’re still welcome. You can even have your own room now. It’s a lot bigger than-“

She cut herself off. I saw the tears forming and I put my hoof around her.

“I know. It’s not the same.”

I pulled her into another hug as she began to cry.

“I just...I just want to be home.”

I felt my own tears forming again. We’d both lost a home today. I could smell the burnt remains of Golden Oaks even from here.

“It’ll be okay Twilight. Everything will be okay.”

I looked to the others behind us. The rest of town had returned to their homes, but the girls were still here. I could see by their looks that they were all pretty shaken by their encounter with Tirek. I didn’t envy them the trauma that would linger. How were they all so whole after every threat they’d dealt with in the recent years?

I realized that the question was ridiculous. To everypony else they seemed invincible. But it was just me now, the outsider that they didn’t have to impress. Fluttershy flinched every minute or so. Pinkie’s eyes were red and her smile was missing. Rarity’s mane had a slightly unkempt look to it, lacking its usual shine. Applejack looked like she’d been run over by a cart. Rainbow’s wings were hanging from her back, almost lifeless. The crowds were gone and the rejoicing was over. The physical and mental wounds of today were setting in.

I met the eyes of each pony and smiled at them. They returned the smile, but I could tell they were finding it difficult.

I lifted Twilight’s head off my shoulder.

“Come on. I think we all need something to eat. Does this place have a kitchen?”

Twilight nodded.

“Yes. But I doubt it has any supplies.”

I turned to Pinkie.

“Can you grab me some ingredients? I’ll make you girls grilled cheese and tomato soup.”

Pinkie smiled and nodded. She turned and walked towards town. Before she got to the first set of buildings she shook every part of her body, shedding off the weight of the day. I couldn’t see her face, but I was sure she was putting on her biggest smile. And then she bounced into town. How she found the energy to put that show on I’ll never know.

I led the others into the castle. They followed me as Twilight nodded the appropriate directions. We found the kitchen easy enough. Each pony found a spot to sit and nurse their wounds. I went to each of them and checked in. I could tell that they appreciated not having to be strong in front of me. I couldn’t imagine having to always have a strong front like that. Then again...I hid behind my own emotional walls. I did understand. I just hadn’t mastered the art of looking positive yet.

Pinkie returned with my ingredients and I went to work. I fired up the stove and prepped the sandwiches while the soup began to heat. Soon the kitchen smelled of cheese and tomatoes. I’d found through reading and my own experimentation that this combination seemed to have therapeutic properties.

I dished up a bowl of soup for each of us, placing a sandwich on the edge of each bowl. Each of the girls took a bowl, quietly thanking me, before sitting at the nearby table. I picked up my own bowl and joined them. We ate in silence.

I looked around the table, noticing that a few of them were tearing up. Clearing my throat caught everypony’s attention.

“So I guess we’re not going to talk about how tough my day was?”.”

They stared at me for a moment. I don’t think my tension-breaker had worked.

And then Rainbow started to chuckle. I smiled as Applejack started to as well. Soon all of the girls were laughing. The conversations began after that as each pony tried to put Tirek behind them. Twilight looked at me and smiled. She mouthed ‘thank you’ from across the table. I nodded to her in recognition.

These ponies dealt with the biggest threats that Equestria had ever seen. And they still found the strength to come back. Seeing this side of them showed me that it was possible to get through my pain. And if they could recover from several near death situations, then I could do the same after one.

———————————

The days passed and things began to return to normal. I still wasn’t used to having my own room. And everything was made of crystal. What was up with that?

It was after the first few days that a discovery was made in the throne room. A map had grown out of the floor. And apparently it was linked to the girls cutie marks. Twilight said they were being ‘called’ to an isolated village.

“That sounds ominous if you ask me.”

“The six of us should be able to handle it if there’s any trouble.”

It was true. I didn’t worry as much about them when they were together. I saw them all off as they began their journey. Each of them gave me a hug on their way out the door. Rarity gave me a kiss on the cheek. My whole face began to burn from that. Was this what blushing felt like? I didn’t have any time to ask as they left on their next adventure. I waved goodbye and shut the door behind them.

I began wandering the halls of the castle, exploring every room I came across. There weren’t many rooms that had a layout. A lot of rooms were completely empty, ready to be made into whatever Twilight wanted them to be. I did however come across a large room that was obviously meant to be the library. I sat in there for half an hour, staring st the empty shelves. I’m sure Twilight would fill this place up in no time.

Spike walked into the room, a scroll in claw.

“There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you.”

“What’s up?”

He held out the scroll.

“This just came for you.”

I looked at the scroll curiously.

“Me?”

“Yeah. Go figure.”

I opened the scroll and read it. I shook my head in disbelief and read it again. And again. Surely this was a joke...

“What’s it say?”

I passed him the scroll and he began reading aloud.

Dear Shade,

It has been brought to my attention that you have been living with my former pupil, Twilight Sparkle. I trust that her reasons for not telling me are justified. I admit that I was shocked to learn of your existence.

If it wouldn’t inconvenience you, I’d like to invite you to Canterlot to meet my sister and I. We have many questions and would greatly appreciate your answers.

Let Twilight know that you may be gone for a few days.

Princess Celestia

Spike looked up from the scroll.

“Wow! An invitation from Celestia? That’s big!”

Invitation huh? It sounded like there was more to it than that.

“Why would she want to meet me Spike?”

“Probably because you’re the first changeling to show up since the invasion.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Really? Is that it?”

“Hey! You asked. And it can’t be that bad.”

“What makes you say that?”

“She could have just sent a couple guards to pick you up.”

A loud knock echoed through the halls of the castle. I looked down at Spike, my brow furrowing.

“Gee! I wonder who’s at the door?”

A nervous smile crawled onto the dragon’s face.

“Well...it could be worse?”

———————————

I looked down in awe as the chariot flew over the city. Canterlot was just as beautiful as I remembered, including the castle we were descending towards.

As the chariot touched down, I hopped out. My two chaperones were quick to join me.

“Lead on boys. I’ve got an appointment to keep.”

I followed the guards as they led the way to the throne room. I would have walked there myself, but they didn’t need to know that I knew the layout already.

We entered the throne room and I nearly froze. Celestia was sitting there. I don’t know what else I expected, but I was nervous all the same. Celestia motioned to me.

“You can come in further. I promise I won’t bite.”

I began to inch into the room. My nervousness trickled away with each step as I approached the throne. Once I was close enough, I bowed.

“It’s an honor to meet you.”

“The pleasure is all mine I’m sure.”

I straightened up.

“I didn’t know that Twilight hadn’t told you about me. I figured she would have done that at the start.”

“I can’t blame her. This is an...odd situation.”

“How did you find out about me?”

Before Celestia could answer, another pony appeared.

“I told her.”

I was looking at a dark blue alicorn. Something seemed familiar... My eyes widened.

“You! You’re the one I’ve been seeing in my dreams!”

She bowed her head.

“It’s good to meet you officially Shade. My name is Luna.”

I bowed again.

“If I’d known who you were-“

“It wasn’t out of secrecy. It was caution.”

I looked up.

“Because of what I am?”

She nodded. Celestia cleared her throat.

“We don’t mean to insult you Shade. But you can understand our hesitation.”

I shrugged.

“No offense taken. I’d probably do the same in your position.”

“Luna told me the few details she learned, but I was hoping for the whole story.”

I sat down and sighed.

“Where to begin?”

———————————

“And that brings us to today.”

Celestia nodded as she processed everything. She’d hardly said a word during my story. Luna had asked a couple of questions, but was otherwise silent too. I sat there, waiting for them to speak. Celestia was first.

“It’s remarkable that you’ve made it this far. And you seem to have adapted to your new life.”

Luna chimed in.

“And with no connection to your horde or Queen.”

Celestia scolded her, but I chuckled.

“Not like I want that connection. Chrysalis can rot for all I care.”

That seemed to surprise them. Celestia sat forward, curiosity in her eyes.

“You feel no allegiance to her, do you?”

I shook my head.

“She doesn’t care what happens to me. I’m one of many.”

“Why do I get the feeling that isn’t true?”

“Believe what you want, but she feels nothing for me. So I feel nothing for her.”

Luna smirked.

“Besides the fear and anger I’ve felt in your dreams.”

“Yes. Besides that.”

Luna stood up.

“I’m satisfied for now sister. I need to get some sleep before my duties.”

Celestia nodded and Luna left. I turned to Celestia.

“So now what?”

“If you don’t mind, I’d like some time to confirm a few things.”

“I did mention that Twilight was out of town?”

“Yes. I’m sure Spike can tell me a few things though. And Zecora as well.”

“So...where does that leave me?”

She stood up and descended from her throne.

“You understand that I don’t entirely trust you?”

“I’d be worried if you did.”

“The guards will show you to your room.”

“Will there by chance be any books? I do enjoy reading.”

She smiled.

“So you said earlier. I’m sure we can arrange that.”

She turned to the guards.

“Show Shade to the library in the east wing. Make sure there are reasonable accommodations for his stay.”

The guards nodded and approached me. I followed them out of the room, glancing over my shoulder at the Princess. Every fiber of my being was screaming to run. The changeling in me was on high alert. I was a prisoner of the enemy. I shoved those feelings back down and began reciting one of Rarity’s meditations in my mind. Everything would be okay. I had to believe that.

Confession

I sat in the library, reading a history book. There seemed to be a surplus of these in the kingdom. I had already read through several in Golden Oaks before. I couldn’t believe there were so many different accounts of the same events. I normally would have thought the repetition useless, but each book had unique details to different sections. The more histories I read, the more the picture filled in. Equestria had a long, rich history!

I was doing my best to go in chronological order. The only problem with this approach was that it appeared that most accounts of the early days were identical. Everypony wrote about the hard times, the unification, and Celestia and Luna being crowned. After that there was only a hoofull of entries that ranged over the initial years. Apparently once the sisters moved to Canterlot there was a much more thorough record kept.

I dipped through the pages of several volumes at once. How odd... There were considerable gaps in the early years of Equestria. The first year of unity was documented in great detail, but after that there was very little until Discord’s reign. That left nearly twenty years unaccounted for. What had happened in the early days of Celestia and Luna? In fact...what had happened to them before becoming royalty?

My head swam with questions as I closed each book. For how long the sisters had been in power, there wasn’t anything too personal written about them. I shook my head to clear it. I hated when my old habits took control. I had started with a novel earlier and slowly moved into ‘gathering enemy secrets’ territory. Why did I need to know every last bit of information? It wasn’t necessary anymore.

As I placed the books back on the shelf, the door opened behind me. I listened to the hoofsteps. The guards were heavy-hoofed. These steps were soft and graceful.

“Hello Celestia.”

I turned around, confirming my guess. The princess stood just inside the doorway. She nodded to the guards behind her and they closed the door, leaving us alone.

“How are you Shade?”

“Given the circumstances? I could be worse.”

Celestia glanced at the bookshelves.

“Did you...reorganize the books?”

“Alphabetical by Author. The same way Twilight kept Golden Oaks.”

“I don’t make it in here very often. I’m not surprised things were a little disorderly.”

“So what brings you here?”

She sat down.

“I’ve checked with a few sources to confirm your story and character. And I felt satisfied once I spoke to Twilight.”

“She's back in Ponyville already?”

“Well it has been four days since you arrived. The girls were happy to know you weren’t lost again.”

Four days? Had it really been that long? Then again, I’d nearly read through every book in the room. I shouldn’t be too surprised.

“Good. I wouldn’t want them to worry.”

“It seemed Twilight and Rarity were especially worried about you.”

“Really?”

“It seems you’ve made some good friends since arriving in Ponyville.”

I smiled.

“Yeah. I have. So....what happens now?”

“I thought we’d go for a walk.”

She stood up and turned to the door.

“If you’re up for it?”

I stretched my legs, feeling my muscles ache from sitting all day.

“That sounds perfect.”

She opened the door and led the way out. I passed the guards without hesitation. They were probably watching me, but I didn’t care at the moment. I was out!

I followed Celestia down the hallway.

“So. How’s Equestria holding up?”

She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye.

“Are you actually asking me? Or are you trying to be polite?”

A nervous grin crossed my face.

“In all honesty I don’t know what to ask about.”

“I’ll start then. How was your reading?”

I perked up at that question.

“Really good! I’ve gotten a grasp of Equestrian history, read most of the classic novels, and even studied some magic theory.”

“Did you read everything in the library?”

“Close. I’m pretty sure I skipped over the dictionary and thesaurus.”

She giggled at that. I was shocked! Had I actually made Celestia laugh?

We came to a door that led out to the gardens. The grounds were amazing! There were so many colors that I wondered if my eyes were even processing all of them. I leaned over and sniffed some of the flowers. Celestia watched me, smiling as I took in more of the gardens.

“You really are different from any changeling we’ve seen before.”

“Thank you. I always felt I was different, but Chrysalis made sure to crush that idea as often as she could.”

“I’m glad you have better influences in your life.”

We continued around the gardens until we came to a path that led under a canopy of flowers. It was a tunnel of petals and stems. Celestia led the way down the path. I followed, looking all around at the walls of flora. I almost missed when Celestia made a sharp turn into the side of the tunnel. I looked down in time to see her her back half disappear into the greenery.

I stepped forward and reached out. My hoof fell through the wall, a slight aura blossoming around it. It seemed this particular section of the tunnel was an illusion. One that Celestia knew well since she’d gone through without hesitation. I pushed through the barrier and found myself in a small clearing. There was a covered platform with cushions on it. Celestia was already sitting down.

“Join me.”

I climbed onto the platform and selected a pillow. As I settled down, a sigh escaped me. I felt like I was back in my bed in Golden Oaks. One of the first comforts I’d ever had in my life. A fleeting moment of sadness hit me as I remembered that that was gone now. I took a deep breath and pushed that feeling back. I met Celestia’s gaze.

“I take it you want to talk more openly?”

“And what makes you think that?”

“A hidden spot in the middle of the gardens? I take it nopony knows about this place. Perfect for speaking openly about touchy subjects.”

“Touchy subjects?”

I rolled my eyes.

“Don’t kid with me Princess.”

Her smile slowly faded.

“You’re right. I want to talk about Chrysalis.”

“I could have guessed that.”

“Have you had any contact with her since you were separated?”

“None at all. And I hope I don’t have to see her ever again.”

“You have a strong dislike of her.”

“Dislike is too nice a word. I hate her.”

She flinched in surprise.

“You said that with a straight face. No anger in your voice at all. Are you so set in your feelings?”

“For Chrysalis? Yes.”

“Why?”

I sighed and held a hoof to my temple.

“She abandoned me.”

“I know that. But what else?”

“Do I really need another reason?”

“No. But I can tell that you have one.”

I glared at the alicorn.

“Well wouldn’t you hate the creature that looked down on you like you were less than dirt? That told you you had no purpose other than to bow down and kiss her hoof? I hate her because she made me believe that I was less than any other creature in the world. That I wasn’t worthy of anything good in my life.”

“You’ve felt like this for a long time.”

“Longer than I care to admit.”

“Before your time in Everfree?”

I took a deep breath.

“Yeah.”

“And yet you never thought to leave?”

My bad leg was beginning to spasm. I shifted my body into a more comfortable position, letting the leg lay out.

“Changelings don’t just leave. Not easily anyways.”

“You tried?”

“Only once. But just as I had my escape planned, Chrysalis gave me my most important mission.”

“And that made you feel important.”

I nodded.

“Did Twilight tell you what I did back then?”

“You spied for Chrysalis.”

I sighed again and stood up, beginning to pace.

“I’ve seen many parts of the world Princess. Chrysalis considers everyone an enemy. I’ve been to the Far East of the Dragon Lands. I’ve been to the Stormy Seas of the South. I’ve seen almost every corner of Equestria, though I couldn’t tell you anything about it now. I never stopped to take in the world around me. It was always the mission. It consumed me. I had to find out everything I could about our enemies. I had to please her.”

“So you spied in hopes of earning her approval?”

I stopped pacing.

“If you were shown the briefest kindness, no matter how false it was, wouldn’t you do anything to replicate it?”

“I couldn’t say.”

“I just...wanted her to think of me as...more.”

“More than the other changelings?”

“Yeah.”

“Were there no others that had similar agendas?”

“No. None of the others questioned their place. They knew exactly what they were meant to be from birth.”

“But you thought you were meant for more?”

“I had hoped.”

“Don’t you think you’re already fulfilling that hope?”

I smiled.

“I suppose you’re right. And I’m doing it without her approval.”

“I can understand you wanting to please your Queen, but it seems like you tried more than most. Why would you feel the need to try so hard?”

“I’ve been like that since birth I think. I was never sure what I was meant to be. Logic told me one thing, but Chrysalis told me otherwise.”

“Didn’t you have any help growing up?”

“Changelings fend for themselves.”

“So you were alone amongst hundreds?”

“Well... I guess there were the Elders. They were the changelings that were alive from before Chrysalis took the throne. They sometimes fed me and played with me when I was a new hatchling. I have faint memories of that time. Most of them died in battle by the time I was ten.”

“So they took care of you. Were your parents among these Elders?”

I shook my head.

“No. At least as far as I knew.”

“Do you remember them?”

“I only have a few moments I can think of. I never actually knew my father. Since hatchlings fight their own battles, we didn’t have anyone to protect us.”

“And your mother?”

“Strangely enough I only have one good memory of her. And it was from right after I hatched.”

“You can remember that?”

“You’re talking to the changeling that just read through a small library. My memory is better then most. But again, I can only recall the one good memory.”

“May I ask what it is?”

I thought back to that day. So many decades ago...

“She picked me up after I hatched. She held me close and kissed my head. And I remember her smiling.”

“It sounds like she loved you.”

“I never saw that smile again.”

“Oh... I’m sorry.... So as far as you know, they’re both gone?”

“I was never close to them Princess. It’s no concern to me.”

“They were your parents though.”

“Yeah. And I’m the son that got tossed aside like a cockroach. I didn’t matter to them”

“So that’s why you were always seeking approval from Chrysalis. You wanted to know that you mattered to somebody.”

“And I finally thought I did when she gave me that last mission.”

“What was the mission?”

I locked eyes with Celestia. If I continued, there was no turning back. I’d avoided giving up too much until this point. If I opened my mouth now, I had to be ready for any consequences. I took a deep breath and made my choice. I couldn’t hide forever.

“I was the one who had to find a weak point in Canterlot. I arrived two months before the invasion and began studying the city, the ponies...everything. I crawled through every inch of this city Celestia. I’ve seen every shop, restaurant, and home. I’ve even been through a majority of your castle.”

Her face hadn’t changed. She just stared at me with her pensive eyes. I continued.

“I couldn’t find anything. I thought I had failed. And then...I felt something amazing.”

“Love?”

“Love. An enormous amount like I’d never felt before. All coming from one pony. Your niece.”

“Cadence has always had a huge capacity for love.”

“I don’t doubt it. But what interested me was where the love as directed.”

“Shining Armor?”

I nodded.

“I followed both of them for a week. And with each passing moment, it all came together.”

“What did?”

“The invasion Celestia. Chrysalis may have ordered me to find the weak points so that she could invade. But how the invasion was carried out? That was my part. I was the one who recommended trading places with Cadence. I was the one who set up the tactical positions of the other changelings.”

I could see it in her eyes. She understood.

“You were the mastermind behind the Invasion of Canterlot.”

I slowly nodded.

“And I’m also the fool who missed the most important detail. The fool who left the door open for Twilight to come in and derail my plan.”

I get a shiver run through my body, making my back ache.

“That’s why Chrysalis abandoned me. She didn’t rescue me because it’s my fault that she didn’t take your throne. She decided that I should die rather than rejoin the horde for my mistake.”

I sat down as another shiver ran through me.

“That’s why I hate her Celestia. Because she’s a cruel beast that couldn’t forgive her...second in command..for his one mistake.”

Celestia nodded.

“You have strong feelings surrounding your past Shade. Most of them dark. I hope that, with time, you will be able to release them for good.”

“Release them?”

“I know you may never forgive Chrysalis for what she did, but the anger you have towards her can dissipate. Anger has a way of seeping into other parts of your life if you’re not careful.”

“I’m not angry with anypony else..”

“I know. I’m just warning you of the consequences of keeping that anger inside.”

She stood up and stretched her legs.

“This has been enlightening. I feel that there’s much we can learn from each other.”

I stood up, stretching as well.

“So what do we do now?”

She smiled and began walking toward the exit. I followed after her.

“I thought you might want to see the library. The main library that is.”

“Oh? Are you trying to bribe me with books?”

“Perhaps a little. To be honest with you Shade, I’d feel a lot better if you’d agree to stay in Canterlot for now. As my guest this time.”

We exited the tunnel and emerged in the main part of the gardens again.

“A guest, huh? Still want to keep an eye on me?”

“Can you blame me for still having a few reservations?”

I chuckled.

“I suppose not. But I hope I can prove to you that I’m not your enemy. Not anymore.”

“I look forward to that day.”

“I’d love to stay and satisfy my curiosity, but I’d like to make a request.”

“And what would that be?”

I stopped in my tracks and took a deep breath.

“Please let me go home.”

She stared at me, a little shocked by my bluntness. I looked up at the alicorn, meeting her eyes.

“I know you’d feel more comfortable with me nearby, but I think that Ponyville is just as safe as here. Plus...I miss my friends. I’d like to see them.”

Celestia stood still, never breaking eye contact as she mulled it over. Her eyes finally closed and she sighed.

“You’re right. It would make little difference to have you here right now. And I’m sure Twilight and the others can make sure you...stay out of trouble.”

A smile was creeping into the corner of her mouth. I smiled back and bowed my head.

“Thank you. I appreciate your understanding.”

I lifted my gaze once more.

“I would like to return sometime and take you up on that library offer.”

Celestia nodded, her smile growing.

“I’d be glad to have you return. But you’re right, you should see your friends. I’m sure they’ve missed you a great deal.”

My stomach growled suddenly and I froze. Celestia had to stifle her laughter.

“Would you...care to have lunch...before you go?”

I straightened up.

“What makes you think I’d want lunch?”

She couldn’t hold it back this time and began to laugh.

Surprises

I was on a train to Ponyville before long. Celestia had introduced some concepts to me that I was still mulling over. There was something in me that wanted to lash out, but Celestia was right. I needed to learn how to let go of the negative and put that energy to better use.

The passing scenery served as a good distraction from my current line of thinking. I needed to step back and relax for a bit. The mountains and trees rolled by as the train pressed on towards home. I couldn’t wait to see everypony.

The train ride seemed to last no time at all. It wasn’t long before I could see Ponyville rising from the horizon. Twilight’s castle was by far the tallest building in town now. The town grew faster as the train began to slow down. A few more minutes and we were pulling into the station. I jumped from my seat and moved towards the exit.

I hopped onto the platform as the train came to a full stop.

“SURPRISE!!”

I fell backwards on to my rump. Where had Pinkie appeared from?! I looked at the pink pony in shock for a moment. As my eyes took in the scene, my smile began to appear. Everypony was here!

“You didn’t have to come to meet me girls.”

Rainbow Dash flew behind me and lifted me back to a standing position.

“As if we wouldn’t welcome back our favorite changeling!”

Twilight walked up to me and pulled me into a hug.

“We’re so happy that you’re back. It’s been too long.”

I returned the hug and chuckled.

“It’s been what? A week?”

“You weren’t here when we returned darling. We were worried.”

I glanced over at Rarity as Twilight backed away.

“Worried about me?”

Fluttershy stepped forward.

“Of course! I thought you’d gotten lost again!”

“It was just a trip to Canterlot. Honestly guys! I’m fine!”

Applejack had a smirk on her face.

“I told them you wouldn’ta wandered off. Yer smarter than that.”

The girls led the way off the platform and we walked to Twilight’s castle. Pinkie Pie filled me in, in a very rushed manner, on their adventure from that strange map. It sounded like they’d had some trouble, but nothing out of their control. Though it did worry me slightly that the culprit from their excursion had been able to get away. Would that pony turn up again?

Pinkie had gotten so into the story that she had almost bounced right onto my back. As I swerved to avoid the unnecessary pain, I bumped flanks with Rarity. She gasped in surprise as she began to tip over. I caught her by the hoof and pulled her back up.

“Sorry! Pinkie’s being a little bit more hyper than normal.”

Rarity checked her mane, making sure it was still in place and sighed.

“It’s fine Shade. Accidents happen.”

Our eyes locked for a moment. And then I realized I was still holding her hoof. I let it go and felt my face heat up a little. I hoped my body was dark enough to hide any blushing. I looked to Rarity to apologize, only to discover a slight pink color to her own cheeks. I didn’t know what to do.

“I uh...we...better catch up with the others.”

“Yes... Yes! They’re almost to the doors. We’d better hurry.”

We rushed to join the others. It seemed none of them had noticed that we’d fallen behind. Or at least I had thought. I saw Twilight glance at me from the corner of her eye, a knowing twinkle hinting at the fact that she’d seen Rarity and I having a moment. I swallowed hard and turned away. Curse my cheeks! Was this blushing going to happen regularly now?!

I followed behind everypony, hoping that my face would cool off by the time we settled in the castle. The girls lead the way to the throne room, taking their respective seats when they entered. I sat down at the edge of the table, feeling a little out of place. Twilight was the last to sit, looking to me as she settled.

“So what did Celestia want to talk about?”

“Oh..just wanted to make sure I wasn’t plotting anything.”

“I told her how much progress you’ve made. I hope that helped.”

“It did and thank you. She’s very cautious about me. But at the same time...I think she was confused.”

Fluttershy chimed in.

“Confused? Princess Celestia?”

I nodded.

“She doesn’t know what to make of me. Not quite yet. I think she’s worried that I might still be a threat. I did what I could to quell those fears, but it’ll probably take some time for her to trust me.”

Twilight sat forward.

“I’m sure Celestia wants nothing more than to trust you, but trust is earned. I’m sure you’ll have plenty of opportunity to show her that you’re worthy of hers.”

I smiled.

“Thanks Twilight. I hope you’re right.”

“Did you talk about anything else?”

“Well... She did invite me to stay in Canterlot longer.”

Twilight looked shocked. I looked around at the others, each with a different level of surprise in their eyes. I shook my head.

“Obviously I said ‘no’ since I’m back in Ponyville. I missed you guys too much.”

“Why would you say ‘no’?”

I looked at Rarity. Her gaze pierced me in a way that made me shiver.

“Well...like I said. I wanted to come home. I don’t belong in Canterlot.”

“Did Celestia ask you to stay in the castle?”

“Uh..yeah. She tried to bribe me with the library. All those books...I can just imagine what knowledge I could discover.”

Twilight cleared her throat.

“I don’t understand. Why not take Celestia up on her offer. I know you consider this your new home, and that we’re here, but there must be another reason you wouldn’t stay.”

I thought long and hard about that.

“I don’t know. It just...didn’t seem like the right move for now.”

Twilight sighed and, thankfully, dropped the subject.

The girls began taking amongst themselves. My eyes found Spike as he was exiting the room.

“Where are you running off to?”

He turned to me and smiled.

“Getting dinner together. Wanna help”

That sounded better than just sitting here catching bits of conversation. I stood up and followed the dragon to the kitchen. The aroma of food was already wafting into the hall. Spike must have started earlier.

“I didn’t know you were a cook!”

“I know a few recipes. I can’t do anything too fancy though. If I could, I’d probably have my own restaurant.”

“Oh you would, would you?”

“Well...maybe..”

I chuckled.

“As long as gems aren’t the only thing on the menu, I’d try it out.”

He began laughing as we entered the kitchen. We gathered the food together and split it onto eight plates. I noticed him put a sprig of parsley onto one of the plates, but not the others.

“That’s a nice touch. Who’s it for?”

Spike blushed and turned away.

“Nopony! It’s for uh...me.”

Uh-huh. And I was a hydra.

“I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I’m sorry.”

“No. It’s okay. I know you didn’t.”

He turned back to the plate and positioned the parsley again. He smiled to himself and picked up a tray, placing half the plates on it. I grabbed the other tray and did the same with the remaining plates. We carried them to the throne room and were met by cheers of joy from the hungry mares. I kept my eye on that parsley plate. Spike dished out the plates to each pony quickly. I almost lost track of my target.

I found the plate again, sitting on the table in front of Rarity. I looked over at Spike and he locked eyes with me. He blushed slightly and I smiled. He had a crush on Rarity. That was cute coming from the little guy. And I understood. She was an impressive pony. And one of the more attractive ones too....

I shook my head. Where had that thought come from? I looked down at my food and began to eat. I glanced around the table at each of the girls. Twilight, friend. Pinkie Pie, friend. Fluttershy, friend. Applejack, friend. Rainbow Dash, friend. Rarity... I lost concentration for a second as I felt a tickling sensation in my stomach area. Why did I have such a different reaction to her?

I thought back to earlier, when I’d held her hoof. Surely there was another explanation for this odd feeling in my gut.

“Are you okay?”

I was startled by Twilight’s question. I looked at the alicorn in confusion.

“What?”

“Are you okay. You’re not touching your food.”

“Oh... I’m fine honestly. Just a little lost in thought.”

She leaned closer and whispered.

“Well if you’re going to be thinking, maybe do it without staring right at her.”

I locked eyes with the Princess, spotting that twinkle again.

“I don’t know what you’re taking about.”

A mischievous grin grew on her lips.

“Of course not. My mistake.”

She sat back and left me with my own thoughts. I started eating again, making sure not to look up.

———————————-

I decided to go for a walk to get some fresh night air. The girls were all leaving so it was a perfect time. I descended the stairs of the castle and aimed toward town.

“Wait up Shade!”

I turned to see Twilight and Rarity coming down to me. I caught Twilight’s gaze and that smile appeared again. What was she up to?

“I thought you could walk Rarity home since it was getting dark. And she lives all the way on the other side of town.”

I turned to Rarity and nodded.

“If you’d like me to. I don’t mind.”

Rarity smiled and nodded in return.

“Thank you Shade.”

She began to walk and I fell into place beside her. I looked over my shoulder at Twilight. She was dancing in place, so proud of herself. I couldn’t believe she was playing matchmaker like this.

I faced forward again and cleared my throat.

“How’s business been for you lately?”

“Very good! In fact, I think I might open a new shop soon!”

“You’re kidding!”

“No! It’s always been my dream to run a boutique in Canterlot.”

“So you’d move there?”

“Oh heavens no! Ponyville is my base of operations. All of my best customers bring their business to me here.”

“So you’d have other ponies running it for you? You’d be the owner?”

“Exactly. My name would be on the boutique, showing all of Canterlot that I am a noteworthy designer!”

I smiled.

“Maybe you should take Celestia up on that offer to stay there.”

“I could see myself living in Canterlot eventually, but that’s the future. I have the present to deal with. Like asking you why you declined Celestia’s offer?”

I sighed.

“I thought we’d discussed this already.”

“None of the girls were satisfied with your answer. I know you’d miss everypony, but it’s a huge opportunity for you! Celestia wants you there for a reason obviously.”

“But I’m so used to Ponyville. I like it here.”

“Change happens Shade. You of all creatures should know that.”

“A little on the nose Rare.”

She giggled.

“Besides, you can always visit. I’ll still need a male model from time to time.”

I nudged her.

“Is that all I am to you? A living mannequin?”

I was surprised when she nudged me back. A shiver ran down my back as she responded.

“Of course not! You’re my friend as well. You’ve always been a huge help when I need you.”

“You’ve helped me a lot too Rarity. I think I’d still be dealing with sleepless nights if it weren’t for you.”

“I was glad to help. I couldn’t stand seeing you in such a state. Which reminds me...how have your nightmares been?”

“They’ve been...regular still. I do my best to meditate before bed every night. It helps get me to sleep, but I still have the dreams. Though I do feel a lot calmer during them. So your lessons must be working.”

“That’s good. I was worried that it wouldn’t help.”

I smiled at her.

“They’ve helped me more than I could have hoped for. You basically saved my life.”

She turned away, but not quick enough. I’d seen the start of her blushing.

“You’re too kind.”

I shook my head.

“I’m not kind enough. I can never thank you enough Rarity. I mean it. You’ve been so friendly to me. More so than most ponies. Besides the girls that is. You make me feel all warm and fuzzy with how nice you are sometimes.”

She turned back to me.

“Warm and fuzzy?”

“Yeah. I’ve never felt like that before. But whenever I look at you, I remember how kind and generous you are to me. It makes me think of the first time we met.”

A smile appeared on her face.

“When you complimented my hair?”

“Yeah! I’d never paid much attention to ponies before Everfree. But seeing you that day, I realized that there was something different about you. Something that made you stand out.”

“And what was that?”

She hadn’t taken her eyes off me while we walked. I only knew this thanks to my peripheral view. Why was she staring so intently? I cleared my throat and continued.

“Well...everything; the way you walked into the room, the way your eyes sparkled, the way your hair flowed down around your face... I’d never seen anypony like you before. I couldn’t believe that there was a pony as beautiful as you.”

We were approaching the boutique. Rarity was still staring at me. I finally stopped and turned to her.

“Do I have dirt on my face or something?”

She continued to meet my gaze.

“What you just said is one of the most romantic things I’ve ever heard. Do you even realize that?”

“Romantic? I was just telling the truth.”

“So you really think I’m the most beautiful pony you’ve ever seen?”

“Well...yeah.”

I thought back over everything I had said to her. As I walked through each portion of the conversation, I began to see the pieces fall into place. Had I actually been romantic? I hadn’t even been trying! I was just talking to Rarity. Sure, I’d been thinking I might have a crush on her, but I hadn’t planned any of this.

And now I was standing here, with her in front of me. She was gazing into my soul with those wonderful, sparkling eyes. I felt something tug in my chest. It wasn’t painful, but it made me inhale sharply. What was this?

All of this went through my head as Rarity leaned forward. I froze, not knowing what to expect. Her face came closer, occupying my vision entirely.

And then she kissed me.

It only lasted for a second before she pulled away and smiled.

“You’re wonderful.”

I didn’t move as she backed away and entered the boutique. I couldn’t. It took a whole minute for my brain to finally pass the message along for my legs to work. I began my walk back to the castle, the kiss replaying in my mind over and over.

This felt different somehow than the last time she’d kissed me on the cheek. I couldn’t stop smiling. I was feeling hot and cold at the same time. I felt like my heart was going to burst from my chest.

I felt....like I could fly again.

A Choice

The next few days drifted by as I considered my next move. Rarity was right, I had a big opportunity in Canterlot. But...was it the right choice? Ponyville had become my home. I’d made friends here. And most of all I wanted to find out what that kiss had meant...

Focus Shade! Come on! There’d be time for that later. What about Celestia? She didn’t quite trust me yet, but that wasn’t surprising. Twilight said I had to prove I was worthy of that trust. If I was in Canterlot that would be a lot easier to accomplish. And the Canterlot Library was ripe for the reading! The things I could learn!

Celestia had made a point of mentioning the library. Was that just to bribe me into staying? Or had she had ulterior motives? Offering me a library...and she knew of my talent...it would make me a useful resource for sure. But was that her goal?

I found myself pacing through Twilight’s castle. I couldn’t hold still while all of these questions were flying around.

“You look troubled.”

I stopped and turned to see Twilight coming out of her study. A sigh escaped me as she approached.

“Just thinking about Canterlot.”

“Have you made any headway?”

I shook my head.

“I don’t know what to do Twilight. Part of me thinks I should go and see what happens, but another part wants to stay here. Ponyville is my home now.”

She smiled and nudged me forward, continuing our trip through the halls.

“I know you’ve made a home here, but there’s no point in living your life in one place. There’s a whole world for you to see. Canterlot is a good place to start.”

“And what about you guys? I won’t know anypony except for Celestia and Luna. I won’t have any friends.”

“We’ll always be here Shade. Just because you move to a new city doesn’t mean you can never see your friends again. And Canterlot isn’t exactly far away.”

“I know. It’s just hard to think of leaving. I know I’d have a huge opportunity there, but I feel like there’s so much more to do here.”

“Like what?”

“Well...there must be some books I haven’t read yet.”

“Most of which would be in Canterlot as well.”

“And I’m still learning a lot about socializing with ponies.”

“There are ponies in Canterlot too.”

“I guess...”

“Though I’m guessing there’s one pony that isn’t in Canterlot?”

“What in Equestria are you talking about?”

The Princess rolled her eyes.

“Come on Shade.”

A scowl formed on my face as I realized what she meant.

“Don’t start with me Twilight.”

“You still haven’t told me about your walk with her. Which makes me think- No wait. Makes me know that something happened!”

“Or there was nothing interesting to say about walking Rarity home. Not everything is an adventure, contrary to how your lives have played out thus far.”

“Then tell me what happened.”

“I just did!”

“Okay then. So if nothing happened, then there’s really no good reason for you to stay in Ponyville.”

“Not true! Maybe I just want to live in a small town. I like the ambiance. Much better than a big city.”

Twilight groaned.

“Fine! Don’t tell me. I’ll just assume that you confessed your feelings and bring it up to her the next time I see her.”

I froze, slowly turning my gaze to her. I expected to see that mischievous grin of hers. What I saw was worse. The grin she had was far more sinister.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Try me.”

“Twilight..”

“Shade.”

“You really shouldn’t meddle in this. It’s not your place.”

“You’re my friend Shade. As is Rarity. And if there’s a new friendship forming, it’s definitely my place to meddle.”

I could feel my eyes getting bigger as I realized she wasn’t bluffing.

“What do you want from me you crazy alicorn?”

“Answers.”

I stared at her for a solid minute, mulling over my options. She wasn’t going to let me out of it. And she was willing to wait. She sat down on the floor, patiently waiting as I chose my fate.

“If I tell you, it doesn’t leave this castle?”

“Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.”

Her hoof covered her eye and I nodded. A Pinkie Promise. I’d seen one before and knew how serious the girls took them. She wouldn’t blab. I sighed and sat down. When I began to speak, it came out fast.

“I told her I thought she was the most beautiful mare I’d ever seen and had thought that since the first time I saw her.”

“So you did confess!”

I took a breath, trying to relax.

“I guess. I didn’t know that’s what I was doing at the time.”

“And what did she say?”

Twilight was crouching now. Her body was poised to jump if the news was good.

“Well...she said it was the most romantic thing she’d ever heard.”

“And?!”

“And...that’s all she said.”

The disappointment began to sink in. Her ears drooped a little. I rolled my eyes and smiled.

“And then she kissed me.”

“WHAT?!?!”

She took off with a forceful beat of her wings, doing somersaults in the air.

“I knew it! I knew something happened! Rarity kissed you!”

She halted her acrobatics and looked down at me.

“Did you kiss her back?”

“Well it happened so fast that I didn’t really have time to respond. She kissed me, said I was wonderful, and went inside.”

“Omygoodness!! This is amazing!”

“Not a word to anypony! You Pinkie Promised.”

Twilight lowered herself to the floor and took a deep breath.

“And I will keep that promise. I’m just...so happy for you!”

She pulled me into a hug, catching me off guard. I tried to pull away, but the alicorn has a death grip on me. When she finally lessened her hold I slipped free.

“Thank Celestia. I thought I’d suffocate.”

“So will you stay in Ponyville for Rarity?”

That was the real question, wasn’t it? I’d been trying to focus on Canterlot, but the real issue was if I wanted to leave and risk halting any chance with Rarity. It was a new, exciting development. But...what if I was reading too much into it?

That’s when an idea popped into my head.

“Twilight? Could I...just ask Rarity if there’s anything between us?”

“That’s pretty forward. But coming from you that doesn’t sound too surprising. Love is a very tricky thing for most ponies. There’s a lot of layers to each aspect. Conversation can be particularly difficult with all of the subtlety it involves.”

“That sounds tiring and overly complicated. Can’t I just ask her if she really likes me?”

“Again, coming from you it wouldn’t be a surprise. You’re pretty straightforward about everything. You said that you basically confessed your feelings without even trying?”

“Yeah.”

“Then this should be just as easy for you!”

Doubtful.

—————————

I held my hoof in midair, afraid to knock it against the boutique door. Was this really the smartest move? Maybe I should reconsider. Maybe tomorrow? Or the next day? Yeah.

As I went to lower my hoof, it connected with the door. The connection produced a loud knock that made me jump. What just happened?!

I didn’t have time to run. The door opened to reveal Rarity. She smiled as our eyes met.

“Shade! What are you doing here darling? Come in, come in!”

She stepped aside and I entered the shop. My heart was beating faster with each step.

“I just wanted to come by to let you know what I’d decided. About Canterlot.”

“Oh! And what is the verdict?”

“Well...I’m highly considering it, but there was...one thing I wasn’t sure about.”

She seemed confused for a second. As I kept her gaze, I began to see the understanding clicking into place. She didn’t say anything though. I cleared my throat and continued.

“I’ve...I’ve never...never felt like I do when I’m around you. You’re one of the first ponies to really see me as anything other than what I am.”

She found her voice again.

“And what are you?”

“To a lot of ponies I’m just a changeling out of place in this world. But you? You treat me like I belong. You make me feel like I’m...normal.”

She smiled, a giggle escaping her.

“I thought I made you feel, what was it? Warm and fuzzy?”

I smiled.

“That too. Especially since-“

I couldn’t bring myself to finish the sentence. I swallowed the words as Rarity’s smile grew.

“Since we kissed?”

“Yeah...that. You really surprised me. I didn’t think that...well, that you thought of me...like that.”

“You surprised me as well. I never thought the changeling I was introduced to would turn out to be one of the sweetest creatures I’d ever met. You’re charming, kind, and thoughtful. How could anypony not like you? There’s so much more to you than what’s on the surface.”

She reached out and brushed my face with her hoof. I felt a shiver run down my spine.

“I hope you didn’t think it too forward of me to kiss you first. I just wasn’t sure if you’d ever pick up on the hints I’ve been dropping.”

“Come again?”

She giggled once more.

“I’m not ashamed to admit that my feelings aren’t a recent development. Every time we’ve been together I’ve felt closer to you. And...I hope that we can find out where this goes.”

Electricity was sparking in my body like crazy. I was tingling all over. I cleared my throat and smiled.

“You know, I was supposed to be saying that. That’s why I came over. I wasn’t sure what to do until I’d talked to you.”

“You mean Canterlot?”

I nodded.

“I thought that maybe I should stay?”

I could tell that she was conflicted. There was a certain sadness in her eyes, but a small smile had formed.

“You can’t give up an opportunity like this Shade. You deserve to have some adventure in your life.”

“But what about-“

She held a hoof to my mouth, shutting me up.

“I would love nothing more than to have time with you, but I think this is something you need to follow through on. Celestia must see something in you that other ponies miss. It will be hard, but I honestly believe that things can work out.”

I moved her hoof away.

“How? If we’re apart, we can’t exactly get to know each other better.”

Well...I’m sure we can arrange something. In fact, I’ll be in Canterlot in a few weeks for the opening of my shop!”

“You got the space you were talking about?”

Her smile grew as she nodded.

“I can’t wait to get it up and running. Maybe we can get together when I’m there? And I’ll be making regular visits to check up on business.”

“And I’d see you every time. After the other day, I don’t know if I could stand not seeing you.”

Her smile curled a little, taking on a more playful look.

“Oh? I left a good impression?”

“You might say that.”

She steeped closer.

“I’m sorry I left so suddenly. I didn’t give you a chance to respond.”

My own playful smile appeared.

“Would you object to receiving my response now?”

“Hmm...I’m usually a stickler for punctuality.”

Another step closer.

“But I suppose I could make an exception. Just this once.”

We were several inches apart now. My heart felt like it would jump out of my throat at any moment. I leaned forward, closing the gap between us. Her eyes closed and her body leaned forward slightly. I brought my lips to hers, and immediately felt like I would melt into the floor. My eyes closed as we sank into the kiss. It was unlike anything I’d ever experienced. We stood there for several seconds, our lips moving together as we shared this moment.

When we broke apart finally, I could only stare at Rarity. Her smile lit up the room. She was the most beautiful thing I’d ever laid eyes on. And for the first time in my life, I felt truly happy.

Even though we’d be apart, I knew that my luck was taking a turn for the better. We could make it work. But that was the future.

Right now, I was busy staring at Rarity. And she was staring back. To me we were the only two in the world at this moment. And it couldn’t get any better. Leave it to Rarity to prove me wrong as she leaned in for a second kiss.

First Meeting

Celestia was happy to hear that I’d be returning. She’d even given me a suite overlooking the gardens. I couldn’t believe the room itself though. It had to be at least four times bigger than my room at Twilight’s.

“I don’t know if I need this much space.”

Celestia paced around the room.

“I thought you might want to build your own personal library in here. And that you would need space to study.”

“Already have a curriculum planned for me Celestia?”

She smiled.

“Not really. But I’m guessing your time is going to be spent between here and the main library for the foreseeable future.”

“True. I plan to read everything you have to offer.”

“Everything? Do you think you’ll be able to handle that much knowledge”

“I’ve handled everything I’ve read so far. That’s...3,347 books to date.

“Consider me impressed. But you’ll have to let me know if you reach your limits. After all, there’s over 40,000 books in the main library alone.”

My heart fell into my stomach. 40,000?! Sure my speed had improved, but the sheer amount of books was enough to make me doubt my ability.

“Well...I guess I’d better get started.”

“Is there anything that you’re hoping to learn specifically?”

“Nothing specific right now. Unless there’s something you were hoping I’d look at?”

Celestia shook her head.

“No. I’m more interested to see a demonstration of your retention. If you can really have all of this knowledge at the ready, perhaps I’ll find a role for you.”

I nodded in understanding. She wanted some proof of my ability. Very well. I’d show her just what I was capable of.

———————————

I sat in the Canterlot Library, reading through a volume on Equestria’s lesser known sorcerers. It seemed many had had minor successes in life. Most were credited with creating spells that I’d never even heard of. Obviously these weren’t everyday spells, but some of these were downright strange. Why did Flarigan the Fortunate feel the need to have a spell that could turn your toothbrush into a snake?

I closed the book and set it back on the shelf. My eyes darted around the spines, looking for my next read. This library was vast! I’d been coming here for three days and had only gotten through 2,000 books so far.

My days were filled with leather covers and dusty pages. I’d gone through histories, biographies, and books on dozens of different -ologies. I was starting to look at things in a new light. And the more I read, the more I began to understand how this world worked. Equestria was a land of love and friendship. That made it a rarity amongst many of the other countries in the world. Most nations functioned through strength. And yet here was a land led by four princesses who didn’t make any great shows of power or strength on a regular basis. There had been enemies to defeat, but power wasn’t what came to mind when you looked at any of them. They ruled through their kindness. Everypony loved them.

Celestia and Luna had been rulers for a long time. Well...more Celestia than Luna, but that was beside the point. They’d lived for over a thousand years with only a few threats to their power. Which made me wonder; just how powerful are the alicorns? Come to think of it...I hadn’t come across much about alicorns so far. Sure I hadn’t read most of the library yet, but I imagine the race would have been mentioned more often at least. Especially the histories. But details were scarce. Nothing beyond Celestia and Luna being crowned.

I began walking through the shelves, looking for anything that might quell my curiosity. There must be a book on alicorns somewhere. My eyes scanned the shelves, hoping to find something obvious. No... That would be too easy. Alicorns weren’t common, so why would there be a convenient manual about them?

I began looking at less-obvious choices. Biology was my first stop. It took a dozen books before I found the first mention of alicorns. A single entry.

The span and bone structure of the pegasus wing is ample for liftoff and gliding, unlike the larger span of the alicorn which incorporates additional bones for further flexibility and power with each wingbeat.

Okay. So alicorns had a slightly different build compared to Pegasi. That didn’t have a lot to do with magic, but it was still interesting. Although...if alicorns have extra bones in their wings, did they also have differences in their horns and magic? I already knew they had a larger capacity for magic, but what if there were more to it?

Celestia had defended the kingdom for a thousand years with almost no help. The fact that few enemies had tried to take over meant that she’d left an impression. And she’d faced some terrifying creatures in her day. Just how powerful were she and Luna?

“Finding anything?”

The voice made me nearly jump out of my skin. I whipped around to discover Celestia standing behind me.

“Don’t sneak up like that! I’m liable to rip a few pages if you don’t announce yourself.”

She smiled.

“I just wanted to check how your studies were going. You’ve been in the here non-stop.”

She looked down at the book in my hooves.

“Pony biology. An interesting read for sure. We ought to commission a newer book with a section on changelings.”

“My biology isn’t overly different from yours. You have two stomachs as well, right?”

I had to fight back my laughter as I watched her eyes grow wider. A smile grew on my face.

“A joke Celestia.”

She began to smile as well. I closed the book and returned it to the shelf, continuing once my gaze returned to her.

“To be honest, changelings and ponies aren’t too different. It’s the diet that’s different. Changeling bodies survive off love, ponies off food.”

“Yet you no longer consume love.”

“Right. Starving for a year will do that to you.”

I began to walk toward the exit.

“Speaking of consuming, I’m famished!”

Celestia followed behind.

“While we walk to the kitchen, can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Why the interest in alicorns?”

I tripped on my own hooves, nearly falling down. I regained my balance and stood still, looking up at the Princess.

“How could you-?”

“I know where every reference to alicorns is in the library. And I also know you found the only one that’s available to the public.”

“So there is material on alicorns?”

“Yes. But I don’t let anypony see it. There are some things that have to remain secret.”

I guess that made sense...

“So why do you want to know?”

“Well...I suppose I was curious as to how powerful all of you were. Equestria has withstood plenty since Discord was locked away the first time. Honestly, your country doesn’t put off an image of strength. Which means that you must carry quite a bit of weight in battle.”

Celestia shook her head and began walking again.

“I haven’t been in battle in a long time. And even then you have to realize that there were several times that I had help from my sister or magical artifacts.”

“A fair point, but you still have enough magic to raise and lower the sun every day. That’s something that took several of Equestira’s strongest unicorns to do.”

“You’ve been reading your histories I see.”

“You’ve had Luna to help you as well as the Elements of Harmony in the past, so I can believe that your powers aren’t as big as ponies make them out to be. Though you don’t seem to mind them thinking that you and your sister are nearly omnipotent.”

“For the record, w never said we were. But ponies tend to tell stories. Pass those down for over a thousand years and things can get a little muddled.

“That’s another thing. You’re over a thousand years old. Nopony has a lifespan like that unless they’re extremely powerful. And to make it this long still looking as young as you do must mean that yours and Luna’s power is off the charts.”

“Oh? You think I look young for my age?”

I rolled my eyes.

“Do you want to look a thousand?”

She giggled.

“It’s true that alicorns have an enormous capacity for magic. And that does have something to do with our aging as well. But that’s all I’ll say about it.”

“May I ask you one last question before lunch?”

“You may. But I might not answer it.”

“Were you born an alicorn?”

The Princess stopped again. She didn’t look at me for several seconds. I shifted uncomfortably.

“I’m sorry. Forget I asked.”

“No. It’s just...nopony has ever asked that. Not even Twilight or Cadence.”

“Really?”

She shook her head.

“I guess we’ve been around long enough that everypony just assumes we’ve always been what we are.”

“So you and Luna...”

“Luna and I ascended...in a way. It's...complicated. And if you're wondering about the possibility, I've never witnessed an alicorn birth in this world.”

She walked ahead, leaving me to process the little she’d offered me. Ascension was a fascinating topic. I’d asked Twilight about her experience once and she’d done her best to explain it. She’d proven that she was worthy of becoming a Princess. Of becoming somepony that ponies could look up to.

So...Celestia and Luna had been regular ponies at one point? Celestia had dodged the question pretty well. I pushed these thoughts back and shook my head to clear it. Celestia had told me all she was going to for now. I needed to let it rest.

I hurried to catch up to Celestia and we walked in silence to the kitchen. The chefs became anxious as they saw their Princess enter. She brushed it off and told them to return to what they were doing. One chef stepped forward and smiled.

“What can I get you today Princess?”

Celestia smiled back at the stallion.

“I’ll have a salad today Butter Whisk. What would you like Shade?”

“What sort of food is there?”

Butter Whisk let out a booming laugh.

“The question is what we don’t have! You name it, I’ll make it.”

“Umm.... A hay sandwich with some apple slices?”

“A pony of simple tastes! I like it!”

He rushed off to gather his supplies. I felt a small smile creep onto my face. Celestia’s seemed amused at this.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing. It’s just...being called a pony felt kind of nice.”

“You do look more pony than changeling.”

My smile grew bigger as Butter Whisk reappeared with our food. Wow he was fast! He set the dishes down on a nearby table. Celestia sat down and tore into her salad without hesitation. I took to my sandwich at a slower pace.

“You don’t waste time, do you?”

Celestia paused, dabbing a napkin across her mouth.

“When you have to rule a country, you have to be quick with certain things. I haven’t eaten a lunch slowly in centuries.”

I chuckled.

“Do you have something planned?”

“Always. It can be a bit annoying actually. Having you whole day planned up until dinnertime. And sometimes even past then!”

“Sounds stressful.”

“That barely begins to describe my days.”

“Well what do you have planned after you’ve inhaled that salad?”

“A meeting with Parliament to discuss taxes.”

“Sounds like sooo much fun.”

“It is to them I’m sure. They’ve been pushing for another hike in property taxes.”

Property taxes. Why did that ring a bell? I thought for a moment, recalling where I’d seen or heard that term. Ah! One of my books from yesterday had involved the beginnings of Equestrian law. Property taxes had been introduced to help fund the upkeep of the new roads that had been built between the cities. Back before the railroads and the hot air balloons everypony had traveled by hoof or cart exclusively.

Tax increases were rather rare in the early days. They’d only really started in the last century or so. Even then, they weren’t often...

“Another hike? Haven’t they made one recently?”

“About two years ago. I’ve always kept raising taxes to a minimum, but the ponies in Parliament have been more aggressive about it.”

“Didn’t you set a law limiting the number of tax increases? I think I read that yesterday.”

“I did actually. But that law was made nearly a thousand years ago. Times change.”

“Has the law though?”

Her fork stopped halfway to her mouth.

“Well...I’m sure there’s been a few alterations, but nothing as extreme as Parliament is pushing.”

I stood up and stretched.

“When is your meeting?”

“In thirty minutes.”

“Is the law section at the library up to date?”

“Most likely.”

“Last question. Where does Parliament meet?”

“If you’re doing what I think you’re doing, I’ll meet you near the main entrance to the castle.”

I raced off to the library without another word.

——————————

I was sitting in a chair by the wall, observing the gathering in front of me. Parliament met at a round table, with Celestia sitting at the head. They were talking back and forth about some trivial matters, but the conversation soon turned to the subject I’d been waiting for. A pony near Celestia raised his voice.

“As we discussed in our last meeting, the need for a tax increase has become paramount for the well-being of the kingdom. The property tax sits at three percent currently, but should be raised to four. I believe I speak for all of Parliament when I say that this increase will help secure much needed services for Equestria.”

Quite the speech.

Celestia sat forward and cleared her throat.

“Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I always have Equestria’s needs at the forefront of my mind. So I must deny the increase.”

Mutters erupted amongst the members. There were even a few gasps at the Princess’ statement. I smiled as I watched the one pony gather his thoughts.

“Deny the-? But...we... Princess Celestia, perhaps I didn’t make it clear-“

“You made it perfectly clear. I thank you for the proposal, but i still have to deny the increase.”

“May we ask why?”

Celestia turned to me.

“I believe my...advisor can fill you in on the details.”

She motioned for me to approach. I stood up and walked over to the table. The ponies of Parliament stared at me, many of them whispering to one another. I must have been quite the sight. My body was normal enough, but there were still some details to my physical appearance that made others realize that I wasn’t what I seemed.

I could feel my anxiety building. I needed to get through this fast. I straightened up and looked at each member.

“It was...brought to my attention...that this is not the first increase in recent years. There was one two years ago as well, correct?”

The one stallion, who I had guessed now must be the Head of Parliament, spoke up.

“Yes. A necessary function in this economy.”

“So you say. But that still doesn’t mean you can raise the taxes a second time in a seven year period.”

“What are you taking about?”

“Equestrian Law: Volume 7, Section 12, Article 17, Paragraph F. Taxes can be increased once every seven years if necessary. A second increase may only be approved in an emergency situation and must be approved by the Royalty.”

I had several pairs of eyes staring at me in shock now. The Head pony cleared his throat, regaining his composure.

“An entertaining display, but there’s no way that you could be correct. We are the lawmakers of Equestria. You’re nothing but...well I don’t know exactly what you are, but it’s obvious that you’re not a pony.”

Celestia leaned forward.

“I’d thank you to keep the conversation civil. I will not have insults thrown around.”

The Head pony bowed his head.

“Forgive me Princess, but I don’t believe your...friend knows what he’s taking about.”

Celestia looked to one of the other ponies.

“Feather Quill? Have you been taking down the minutes?”

A unicorn with a notepad paused in her writing.

“Of course Princess.”

“And you have the volumes of Equestrian Law on hoof?”

“Yes, though I don’t have it memorized like your..advisor does.”

“Could you confirm that his quotation is true?”

Feather Quill stood up and trotted over to a shelf, pulling down a volume of Equestrian Law. She flipped through the pages until she found the passage. As she read she began to nod.

“He quoted it exactly. And if you’ve already denied the increase, then the discussion is closed for another five years.”

The Head pony scowled as Feather Quill returned to her seat.

“You would take the word of this foreigner over your own Parliament Celestia?”

I took a step forward and frowned. My anxiety seemed to melt away as I began to speak.

“That’s Princess Celestia to you. And you’ll respect her decision.”

I looked around at the other ponies.

“The fact that you would even attempt to slip an illegal motion through here is despicable. It makes me wonder if the increase was for Equestria, or for your own pockets.”

They were beginning to look uncomfortable. But the Head pony stood up, his anger bubbling to the surface.

“Who are you to accuse us of such villainy? Of such...treason?!”

I turned to him, narrowing my eyes.

“Weren’t you listening to your Princess? I’m her advisor. Her right hoof so to say. She’s trusted one of my opinions so far. Should I make another concerning you?”

The silence in the room was deafening. But it was quickly broken as Celestia stood, towering over all of us.

“I think that concludes today’s session. I’ll see you all next week.”

Her dismissal brought everypony back from shock. They nodded to each other and exited the room. The Head pony was last, his eyes never leaving me until the door closed behind him.

I left out a sigh.

“Thank the Sun! I nearly lost it.”

I collapsed into one of the seats, taking a deep breath. Celestia looked down at me.

“You were pushing your luck there, don’t you think?”

“Oh come on Celestia. They all needed a wake up call. Especially that one stallion.”

“He’s the Head of Parliament, one of the most influential ponies in Equestria.”

“Well he needs to know that he can’t walk all over you.”

“Where exactly did that confidence come from? You took command of the room!”

“I...I guess I didn’t like how he was talking to you. You’re the ruler after all. He should show you respect.”

Celestia sat in her seat.

“Was that your role in the hive? Demanding respect for Chrysalis?”

“No. She commanded respect through fear.”

“So why the sudden urge to protect me then?”

“Well...I guess that you’re...kind of...sort of...my friend. And I don’t like ponies bullying my friends.”

Celestia smiled.

“Thank you Shade. That means a lot to me.”

She stood and began to walk toward the door.

“I should have you at all my meetings. They’d definitely be more entertaining.”

I stood to follow her.

“Are you trying to kill me with boredom?”

“If that was possible I wouldn’t have lasted a year, let alone a thousand.”

I chuckled.

“Well...I guess I don’t have any other plans today.”

“Good. After all, I can’t attend my meetings without my ‘right hoof’ as you said.”

I returned her smile as we exited the room. Maybe Canterlot wouldn’t be so bad after all.

A Dream And Lunch

A day went by without hearing anything from Luna. I was still trying to decipher our meeting when I received a scroll from one of the staff. I took it without question and rolled it open.

Shade

I’ve spoken with Celestia on the matter and we’ve come to an agreement. Please return to your room and get some rest. You’ll be joining me tonight.

Luna

I stared at the scroll for several seconds. What did Luna have planned for me?

I sighed, realizing that there would be no way around it. Whatever she’d prepared was something Celestia approved of. If both of them were in on this, I had no choice.

I rolled the scroll up and returned to my room, wondering how I was supposed to sleep this early. It wasn’t even midday yet! I drew the curtains closed, blocking out a majority of the sunlight. That ought to help.

I climbed into bed and got settled. A sigh left me as the sheets and pillows encompassed me entirely. It seemed my body was ready to rest, even though my mind was still racing. I began my meditation, attempting to slow down the thoughts flying around my head.

Take a deep breath.

I smiled, recognizing the voice. I always heard her voice when I did my exercises.

Breathe out, forcing all of your thoughts to exit your body.

I felt my head begin to empty.

Now open your eyes.

What? That wasn’t part of the exercise..

Open your eyes Shade.

My eyelids slowly lifted and I was greeted by Rarity.

“Wha-? How?”

I looked around and discovered that I was no longer in bed. I was in the boutique! My vision shifted back to Rarity, confusion still filling my eyes.

“What’s going on?”

“What do you mean darling?”

“I was meditating a minute ago.”

“Is that why you had your eyes closed? I was wondering about that.”

“But...I was in Canterlot.”

“Yes. You got back the other day. Have you decided if you’re taking Celestia up on her offer?”

That’s when it clicked. I was dreaming!

“I didn’t even realize that I’d fallen asleep.”

Rarity smiled and stepped closer.

“You look pretty awake to me.”

She leaned forward and kissed me. I panicked for a split second, but then remembered that this was a dream. I felt my body melt a little. Even as a dream, this felt heavenly. Rarity pulled away after a few seconds.

“You know that I fancy you. And I know you fancy me. So what’s holding you back?”

I swallowed.

“Well uh...I don’t want to rush things. I thought we were getting to know each other better”

“You should relax Shade. If you stay wound up like that you’re liable to burst one day.”

She led me over to the lounge and we resumed kissing. She was being so forward! I didn’t know what to expect or believe. I knew that Rarity probably wasn’t like this, but the dream was leading me on.

Dream Rarity suddenly pushed me back against the lounge and smiled.

“Do you really think I’m the most beautiful mare you’ve ever seen?”

I smiled.

“No question. You’re as beautiful as they come.”

She beamed from ear to ear. I felt her body slowly slide on top of me. I froze, not knowing what to do. Was this happening?!

“You really know how to flatter a girl, don’t you? Your words speak volumes and your actions- Oh!”

She giggled, laying on top of me as I blushed at my predicament.

“Your actions leave little to say. So what shall we do about this?”

“Well....I uh....maybe we should...”

‘KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK’

My head snapped to the front door. Thank Celestia! Saved by the door! I turned to look at Rarity again, but she’d disappeared. I looked around the boutique. She was nowhere to be found.

‘KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK’

Who the hay could that be?

“Um....come in?”

The door opened to reveal Luna. I laid there, frozen in confusion.

“What are you doing here?!”

Luna looked just as shocked as I did.

“I...I don’t know. I was sleeping when everything shifted. I found myself in Ponyville, in front of this shop. Wait...is that really you Shade?”

“Of course it’s me! What are you doing in my dream?”

Her eyes widened in understanding.

“Ah! I must have accidentally slipped into your dream without meaning to. It’s rare that there are ponies asleep during the day besides myself. I suppose that and your close proximity in the castle.”

She stepped into the shop, closing the door behind her.

“This is Rarity’s shop, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s quaint. I like it. But why are you-“

Her sentence cut off as she turned around suddenly.

“I apologize. I didn’t know I was interrupting.”

My eyes glanced down the lounge and I shuddered, remembering my situation. My face grew hotter by the second as I blushed harder than I ever had.

“It’s not- I mean it just-“

Great! I had just flashed one of the Princesses. Could my life get any worse?! I’d almost rather be back in Everfree right now!

Luna waved a hoof, still facing away.

“No! Don’t apologize. Or explain. I know these dreams happen from time to time. I’m usually good at avoiding them. I didn’t mean to intrude on you like this.”

I pulled a blanket onto my body and sat up.

“It’s not your fault...I think. And nothing happened anyways.”

Luna glanced over her shoulder. At seeing the blanket, she turned back around to me.

“I’m truly sorry. I didn’t mean to show up like this.”

“Honesty...I’m glad you did.”

She looked surprised again.

“Really? Were you not enjoying yourself?”

“Well I think it’s obvious that part of me was, but I was beginning to panic a bit. I’ve never been...physical with anypony before.”

“Well that shouldn’t be a concern for somepony as young as you are.”

“I’m not that young. Especially by pony standards.”

“What about by changeling standards?”

“I’m still young, but I’m almost....thirty years late to the party. A lot of changelings have coupled by the time they hit sixty.”

I waited for another surprised expression, but Luna didn’t seem fazed by my comment.

“I didn’t know changelings had an extended life like that. But why does it concern you if you’ve not been...intimate?”

“Well...I just don’t want to...screw anything up. From the books I’ve read, this can ruin relationships.”

“Oh? You’re in a relationship?”

“No. Yes? I’m not sure. It’s new.”

Luna looked around the boutique again.

“Would I be safe to assume that this involves Rarity?”

I blushed again. Luna smiled.

“It’s alright. I can understand the attraction. She’s a pretty mare.”

“It’s more than that. She’s one of my best friends.”

“Another good attribute for a relationship.”

“We’ve kissed before, but I don’t know about taking the next step. And then there’s-“

Luna held a hoof to my mouth.

“You’re working yourself up over things that haven’t happened yet. Focus on the present and enjoy the time you have with her. If it moves further, then it moves further. But don’t stress about that aspect too soon. You might ruin the experience.”

I cocked an eyebrow.

“You say that as if from experience.”

She blushed.

“Well...not my own... But I’ve picked up a few things from the dreams of everypony.”

“So you and Celestia are in the same boat. How did no stallion ever try to flirt with you at least?”

That made her giggle.

“A few tried. Most lost their confidence after standing in front of us for a few seconds. We can be rather intimidating.”

“I’d love to meet the stallion who was brave enough to try.”

Luna eyes grew dim as she sat down and sighed.

“A stallion would have made things a little easier for me. Maybe I wouldn’t have given in to my darker half.”

“You don’t know that for sure.”

“True. But who knows? Things could have been very different...”

She seemed to be lost in thought. No doubt revisiting her younger years. I cleared my throat to speak and that seemed to grab her attention again.

“Couldn’t you and Celestia possibly still find yourselves somepony?”

“Oh? You know of some ponies who are comfortable with dating their rulers?”

“....Good point.”

Luna stood back up.

“It’s nothing to dwell on. Our path was chosen a long time ago. I should let you rest.”

She began to walk toward the exit.

“Wait a second! What exactly are we doing tonight? You never cleared that up.”

Luna glanced over her shoulder and smiled.

“Why, your first magic lesson of course.”

With a flash she was gone, leaving me to register what she’d said. Magic lessons?

——————————

I woke up the next day with a headache. Holy Tartarus did that hurt! I slowly sat up, my head pounding away. With great effort, I stood up and made my way to the kitchen. Had the sun always been so bright? Had the castle always been so well lit? I could barely keep my eyes open!

“Looks like somepony had a busy night.”

I cracked one eye open and found Celestia walking towards me.

“Do you have to be so loud?”

“I take it the magic lesson went well.”

“I barely levitated a scroll.”

“But you got it off the ground?”

“I suppose..”

“Then you’ve made progress. That’s wonderful!”

“Again, keep the volume down. Are you using your Canterlot Voice?”

She smiled.

“Learning a different type of magic can be difficult. I remember the headaches I used to get when I was first raising the Sun.”

“But isn’t that your magic?”

“Actually, my magic specialty is concealment, illusion, and defense. Raising the Sun is just an extra skill I had to develop.”

“Wait. Really?”

“Mhmm.”

“What’s Luna’s specialty?”

“Dreams, transfiguration, and offense.”

Wow. That was interesting. I had always thought that the control of the celestial bodies was their primary power. Who’d have thought?

“Were you heading for the kitchen?”

“Yeah. I’m starving. And I need something for this headache.”

We began walking down the hall. Celestia smiled.

“So Luna put you through your paces?”

“She wouldn’t quit. She kept me going half the night.”

“You must have quite the stamina to last half the night.”

I glanced at her from the corner of my eye. She was grinning like a schoolfilly.

“Don’t start with me Celestia. I’m not in the mood.”

“Really? That’s not what Luna said.”

I nearly tripped on the carpet. I looked up at the Princess, horrified.

“What?! She didn’t!”

Celestia was doing her best not to laugh.

“I’m sorry Shade. We don’t have a lot to talk about some days. So Luna walking in on your...exciting dream was kind of the highlight of the morning.”

I grit my teeth.

“I swear I’m going to send her right back to the moon.”

“Don’t worry. It’s between the three of us.”

She continued walking and I, begrudgingly, caught up. Celestia looked down at me again.

“How come you never mentioned Rarity?”

“Because its nopony’s business.”

“Can’t you tell me?”

“Honestly? You’re as bad as Twilight! Are all alicorns this nosy?”

“Yes. But that’s a rather unfair question as there’s only four of us.”

“Just my luck. I’ve got to be friends with the race that butts into my personal life.”

“So....”

I rolled my eyes.

“Yes. I like Rarity. And she likes me too. But nothing else has happened. We haven’t even seen each other since I came here”

“I could help change that!”

My eyes widened.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

A scroll materialized in front of her and she rolled it open.

“Twilight and the others were in town for Rarity’s grand opening this last week.”

My heart began pounding.

“I missed the grand opening?! Why didn’t they tell me?!”

“May I continue?”

I nodded, trying to take a deep breath.

“Twilight said the opening was a success, but that Rarity has been a bit stressed trying to fill orders for the past week. She also said that Rarity is still in town, but will be heading back tonight.”

“She’s still here?”

“Her boutique is over on Diamond Street.”

I didn’t even give it a second thought before running back the way I’d come.

———————————

I was out of breath when I approached the boutique. It looked amazing! There were mannequins in the windows with beautiful dresses. I recognized some of the designs from her sketchbook!

I opened the door and walked in. There were a few ponies milling about, looking at the clothing. A tall mare took notice of me and approached.

“Welcome to Canterlot Carousel. How can I help you?”

She was close enough now to get a good look at me. It was easy to tell she was a little taken aback. I doubt I was the prettiest thing in the shop at the moment. I put on my best smile.

“I’m here to see Rarity.”

“And who shall I say is asking for her?”

“No need for names. It’s a message from the castle.”

“Really? I’ll go and fetch her!”

I mentally patted myself on the back for the quick lie. I wanted to surprise Rarity, but I also didn’t feel it necessary to be spreading my name around. I’d already heard some whispers about myself from Butter Whisk. My presence at meetings had caused quite a stir and had sparked a fire in the rumor mill. I didn’t know how far the rumors were spread and didn’t need my name attached with any of them.

Rarity emerged from the back. She was fixing her mane when she spotted me. Her face lit up at once.

“You came!!”

She raced over to me, pulling me into a hug. A few of the ponies in the shop looked in our direction. I pulled myself out of the hug and cleared my throat.

“Yes. I know you’ve been waiting for this message for a while Miss Rarity. Is there somewhere quieter we could speak?”

She looked confused for a split second. But as her eyes darted around the room, she understood. Her smile returned and she motioned for me to follow.

“Of course. Come to the back room. Sassy? Will you give us some privacy while I get the message.”

The mare nodded.

“Of course Rarity. Take as long as you need. I hope it’s good news!”

Rarity led me into the back room. Before I could say anything though, she turned and planted a kiss on me that made my legs turn to jelly. I had to sit down! She broke the kiss and stepped back as I shook my head. I couldn’t help but grin like an idiot.

“Hello to you too.”

“I would have done that earlier, but we had an audience. Now why were you pretending to be a messenger?”

“What? You haven’t heard the rumors?”

“I’ve been cooped up in this shop making a hundred dresses for a week.”

“Ouch. It sounds like you have a story to tell. Mind telling me over lunch?”

Her eyes sparkled.

“That sounds marvelous! I’m starving.”

My stomach chose to growl at that exact moment. Rarity stifled a giggle.

“It sounds like you are too.”

————————

We found a cafe around the corner and ordered lunch. While we were waiting for the food, Rarity told me about the drama of opening her new boutique.

“I can’t believe you nearly closed it!”

“If you had had to make a hundred identical dresses, you would have tried to quit too.”

“Fair point.”

My head pulsed suddenly, reminding me of my headache. I put a hoof to my head. Rarity looked concerned.

“What’s the matter?”

“Just a headache. Luna really did a number on me last night.”

Her face took on a reddish hue.

“And what does that mean?!”

“Horse-feathers! No! Not- I’d never...”

I hid my face in my hooves.

“She’s teaching me how to use regular magic. My first lesson was last night and she was pushing me hard to learn a simple levitation spell. I got a headache from trying so much.”

Rarity sighed, her face beginning to return to normal.

“Really Shade! You need to work on your phrasing.”

“Sorry. I really need to think before I speak.”

“I should say so.”

The food arrived and we began to eat. Rarity looked up at me after taking a couple bites.

“So you’re learning to use magic besides your own?”

I nodded and swallowed my bite.

“I’ve been developing some magic buildup lately, but I don’t want to use my transformation magic. I don’t want to cause a panic.”

“Magic buildup? That’s pretty rare. You really haven’t used magic before last night?”

“Since changing my looks? No.”

“That was several months ago! I couldn’t imagine not using magic for so long!”

“Well hopefully Luna can help fix that.”

“What’s she like as a teacher? I’ve heard about Celestia from Twilight, but Luna must be different.”

“I’d say so. She was really pushing me to the limit to learn that spell. But she never seemed frustrated with me, just...determined.”

“That doesn’t sound too bad. Especially if she remained calm.”

“Yeah...Though her commands did get louder as the lesson went on. She was using her Canterlot Voice by the end.”

Rarity smiled.

“I hate to tell you, but I think she got a little frustrated.”

I chuckled.

“Are you sure?”

We laughed for a minute before returning to our food. Before long though I paused again, looking at Rarity.

“When do you leave town?”

“I’m catching the train tonight.”

“When will you be back?”

She sat up straight and smiled again.

“Soon. I’ll want to check on the boutique. Though I’m confident that Sassy Saddles will do just fine with the business. It might be a little longer.”

My smile faded a little.

“I understand. You wouldn’t want to be traveling here constantly.”

She reached her hoof across the table and put it on top of my hoof.

“I’ll see what I can do. I want to see you more as well. But two shops is a lot to run. And my business has to come first for now. Even though I’d rather spend the time with you.”

My smile returned.

“That’s sweet of you. I understand. You’ve got a business to run. I’m just a bookworm in the castle.”

“Speaking of the castle, what was with the act earlier? You mentioned some rumors?”

I looked around to make sure that nopony was nearby. It was really more of a show for Rarity, but it did relieve me to see we were alone.

“Rumor has it that there’s a mysterious pony advising Celestia.”

“Advising? Do you really?”

I shook my head.

“No. It’s more of a game between us. But that’s the story the rest of the staff is passing around.”

“Don’t you hate having rumors told about you?”

“Nah. It’s not so bad. Plus its building me quite the reputation. Not that that matters to me. It’s just fun to hear what ponies are saying. At this point I’m either an illusion conjured by Celestia, or a shadow brought to life.”

“That does make you sound mysterious!”

I brushed my mane back

“Bet you didn’t know you liked a guy with such mystique.”

She rolled her eyes. I chuckled.

“I hope we can do this again soon.”

Rarity smiled and nodded.

“I’d like that very much. I had fun today.”

“Me too.”

Her smile turned more mischievous.

“I’ll admit, thinking of you as a mysterious stallion is pretty sexy.”

Chills ran up and down my spine.

Magic And Titles

I sat on the floor, gasping for air.

“Give me a break! I need to catch my breath!”

“You can catch your breath when we’re finished.”

“We’ve been at it for an hour. I don’t think it’s going to happen at this point.”

“We’re not done.”

“Come on Luna! You’re riding me way too hard here!”

Luna stomped her hoof against the ground.

“If you can’t do a simple levitation spell, then you’re going to be dealing with a lot worse in the future. This is first year magic! It’s not that difficult.”

“This coming from one of the most powerful ponies in Equestria. I’m not a pony Luna! We’ve been trying levitation for three nights straight. Can’t we try something else?”

“Again!”

I stared the alicorn down. Unfortunately she stared right back, her gaze overpowering my own.

“Fine!”

I focused on the scroll in front of me, willing it to float off the ground. A green aura formed around the paper. I could almost feel the magic grip the scroll. It lifted a fraction of an inch and...

The scroll dropped to the floor and rolled away.

Luna’s eyes followed the paper as it came to rest a few feet away. She turned her gaze back to me.

“Well if your plan is to have things skim across the floor, then you’ve nearly done it.”

“Oh shut up!”

It took me a moment to register that I’d just said that to a Princess. When it hit me, I froze. My eyes slowly connected with Luna’s. She was glaring at me.

“I will excuse that as we’re both frustrated.”

I sighed.

“You can say that again.”

“I can understand being frustrated with your magic, but you have to realize-“

“I’m not frustrated with myself Luna.”

That caught her off guard. She was silent for a few seconds as she made the connection.

“What have I done to warrant such behavior?”

“You’re kidding right?”

She sat down, her brow furrowing.

“If you have something to say, by all means.”

“You’re being too aggressive! You’re pushing me to master a spell that very few of my species could learn. You say it’s basic magic, but to me it’s not! Not to mention you driving me to the brink the last few nights is only making my headaches worse.”

“That more than likely has to do with the buildup.”

“I’m going to die of a migraine far sooner than the buildup if you keep torturing me like this!”

I took a deep breath. Luna blinked a couple times.

“So you’re saying that I’m a bad teacher?”

“If this is teaching, than I pity those in school.”

Luna slowly stood up and walked out to the balcony. She stared out over Canterlot as I sat alone in her tower. I picked myself up and joined her after a moment.

“Look...I’m sorry. I appreciate that you’re trying to help me, but you can’t just order me to perform magic that I’ve never practiced before.”

She didn’t say anything. I stood there, out of words. All we did was look down on Canterlot. The night was peaceful. I could make out some crickets chirping in the garden. My gaze moved towards the sky and I nearly gasped. The sky was perfectly clear. I felt like I could see every star in existence!

“Wow.”

I could see Luna from the corner of my eye. She was staring at me. I would have looked at her, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the heavens.

“To think that ponies miss out on this. No wonder you were so sad back then.”

“Why would you say that I was sad? It’s my anger that took me over.”

“Because I see it in your eyes.”

I finally turned to her.

“You watch over everypony without ever getting anything in return. No gratitude, no recognition, nothing. Maybe you’ve made up with Celestia and are striving to be a Princess worthy of Equestria’s love, but your eyes tell a different story.”

“Oh really? And what is that story?”

“That there are many days where you’re still just as sad as the first time you realized nopony saw your beautiful night sky. Maybe you’re not sad for that specific reason anymore, but the feelings are still there.”

A single tear ran down her cheek. She wiped it away quickly, her face becoming stern.

“Don’t act like you know me so well. You’ve no idea what I’ve been through in my life.”

“Maybe I don’t know everything, but I do know a lot.”

“From your books? Please. Those barely scratch the surface.”

I nodded.

“You’re right. What do I know?”

I waked back inside.

“I’ve read nearly half the books in the library now. I’ve read every historical account of that era. Everypony painted you in the worst light. To them you were a jealous, narcissistic monster. Nopony seemed to remember what you’d been before. Then again, your job leaves little time for public appearances.”

I turned to find that Luna had followed me inside.

“You’ve been alone for so long. And now you decide to take on me as a student. I can easily see that you’re not the monster history painted you to be. But I can also tell that you’re not used to socializing with others for extended periods. Have you spent more time with me than anypony else recently?”

She slowly nodded.

“I’ve never needed to converse with ponies for long in the real world. Celestia is the only one, but even then...”

“I can tell. You’re social cues are a bit...outdated?”

“You’re one to talk.”

I chuckled.

“Give me a break. I’m learning. Just like you.”

“And what am I learning?”

“How to teach. First lesson, don’t push the student to the point of insanity.”

She smiled.

“I suppose I can try. But the student also needs to learn how to try harder.”

“Do you want to give me an aneurism?”

“Can you at least admit that you’re giving up too soon?”

“Giving up? I wasn’t....”

I trailed off. Wow... She was right. Every time that scroll fell I wanted to stop. I was losing faith in myself and didn’t want to try anymore. As this realization hit me, Luna smiled.

“There you go.”

She placed the scroll in front of me.

“I want you to imagine that this is...a flower!”

“A flower?”

“Yes. And now picture that I am Rarity.”

“Come again?”

“I’m Rarity. And that’s the flower you picked out for me.”

I looked down at the scroll. A flower for Rarity...

“Aren’t you going to give me that lovely flower?”

My eyes sparked as I imagined Rarity saying it. Without realizing what I was doing, the scroll lit up with my green aura. It began to levitate slowly, but steadily, off of the ground. I willed it forward towards Luna. The scroll began to glide through the air between us until it was floating in front of her face.

Luna smiled.

“Well look at that. This old changeling can learn new tricks after all.”

—————————

I woke up the next morning as the sun rose. I grumbled at the early hour and tried to turn over. Maybe if I covered my head with the sheets, I could get a few more hours.

‘KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK’

Oh come on!

I sat up, rubbing my eyes.

“Come in.”

The door opened and a pony walked in.

“Princess Celestia has requested you in the dining room.”

“May I ask for what reason?”

“Breakfast.”

My stomach growled at the word.

“Tell her I’ll be right there.”

The pony nodded and exited the room.

I moved to the edge of the bed and sighed.

“When did life become so busy?”

I stood up and walked to my mirror. My mane was disheveled. I would need my comb to look presentable.

As if on cue, my comb hovered in front of my face. I could only stare at it for several seconds. My magic aura was surrounding the comb. Had I really summoned it so easily?

“Okay...”

I thought of running the comb through my mane. The comb began to move into position. Slowly, but surely, it dipped into my hair and began straightening it out.

“How did I do this before magic?”

The comb continued as long as I focused. When I was satisfied with the results, I set the comb down on the table and examined my mane in the mirror.

“Not bad.”’

My stomach growled, reminding me that I was supposed to be meeting Celestia. I left my room and made my way to the dining room.

Celestia was sitting at one end of the table. I took my seat opposite her and dug into the breakfast on my plate.

“Good morning to you too.”

I paused and looked up.

“Sorry. Good morning Celestia.”

She smiled.

“How was your night?”

“Pretty good actually. Is there salt?”

Celestia nodded. Before she could levitate the salt to me, my aura covered the salt shaker. I willed it over to my plate, giving it a few shakes over my eggs. Celestia watched in surprise.

“That’s wonderful! You had your breakthrough!”

I smiled.

“Luna and I finally found the sweet spot for our student/teacher relationship. I was surprised how quickly it happened after that.”

“And your headaches?”

I thought for a moment. And then it hit me.

“I...I don’t think I have one this morning!”

“That’s good to hear. I’m sure that figuring out that spell helped to relieve some of the buildup.”

“So now that I’ve got levitation down, when do I learn to raise the Sun?”

That got a laugh out of her.

“Baby steps Shade. Don’t let your newfound power go to your head.”

I chuckled and returned to my breakfast. We ate in silence for several minutes. As our plates became bare, I sat back and sighed. My eyes closed as I rubbed my belly.

“Nothing like a good breakfast.”

“How true. I feel like my stomach might burst.”

“Well the Sun is up for the day. I’m sure you’d be fine to slip into a food coma.”

“I would if we didn’t have meetings.”

“Damn. How many?”

“Four.”

“Another long day, huh?”

“I’ve been meaning to ask you something about the meetings.”

I opened an eye and locked it on the Princess.

“What’s up?”

“You’ve been sitting back as an observer for a while now. Your studies have progressed and you’ve covered most of the subjects I’ve suggested. So how would you like to start sitting at the table and contributing to these meetings?”

I opened my other eye and sat up.

“Contribute? Like one of your counsel members?”

“More than that really. Your knowledge goes beyond that of a normal pony. You remember every law, amendment, and fact that you’ve ever read. I can’t help but think that you’d be useful at my side as a sort of...encyclopedia?”

“Wow. Is that what I’ve been reduced to?”

“You know that’s not how I mean it. I’m just not sure how to word it precisely.”

“So I’d tell you anything you need to know? Or just say if somepony is wrong?”

“That’s part of it I suppose.”

“Am I going to have to start introducing myself? I’ve gotten this far without my name getting mixed in.”

“I’d thought about that. Perhaps you should have an official title.”

“What exactly is my role?”

“You’d still be my advisor. Honestly I’d trust your word over some ponies. You’ve been a great help so far with my official duties. And you’ve also become my good friend. Luna’s too as she tells it. I can’t remember the last time we had somepony outside of the family to call friend. Most everyone is an acquaintance or ally.”

“I’m honored that you consider me so highly. I’m proud to call you my friend as well. And I would be honored to serve you and Luna in whatever way I can. Consider me an extension of yourself. I’ll be your eyes and hooves if you wish.”

Her eyes lit up.

“Thank you Shade. That means so much. And I think you gave me an idea for your title!”

“Oh?”

“I would be proud to have you as my Right Hoof; friend and advisor to the Royal Family.”

“Your Right Hoof... I like it. It sounds official. And still a bit mysterious.”

“So you still don’t want your name attached in any way?”

“Probably for the best. I don’t need ponies trying to figure out more about me.”

Celestia nodded.

“True. I’ve been trying to work out how best to introduce the fact that your a changeling. But perhaps that’s better saved for another time.”

I nodded in agreement and stood up. The Right Hoof to the Royal Family! What an honor!

I followed Celestia out of the dining room as we made our way to the first meeting. She began to giggle as we walked. I looked up at her.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“What?!”

“Well...your mane is a bit messy in the back. Did you roll out of bed like that?”

I reached back and felt my hair. A groan escaped me as Celestia continued to giggle.

First Hearth’s Warming

The air grew colder with each passing day. I began to wear a scarf whenever I went outside. The hive was far enough south that we usually didn’t deal with the winter season. How did ponies do this every year?

This particular morning I was walking back from Luna’s tower. We had been up all night working on a summoning spell. I’d been working on it for a week straight with minor success. I could summon an object if it was in front of me, but I was still struggling with unseen items. Luna had been trying to help me figure out how to summon a cup from the shelf behind me.

Luna was becoming more relaxed with each evening, but I could tell she was a little irked that I wasn’t catching on quicker. Give me a break! I’m not Twilight. These simple spells were a lot harder for a non-pony like me. But did that make her go easy? Not a chance!

I entered the castle and made my way towards the dining room. My stomach was ready to turn inside out with how hungry it was.

I entered the room to find Celestia seating herself. She smiled at me.

“Good morning! I didn’t expect to see you so early.”

I sat down in my usual spot.

“Don’t we have a meeting with that committee from Vanhoover?”

“Well yes, but I figured you’d be taking a rain check on that one. You were up all night, weren’t you?”

“What gave it away?”

“I could hear you two bickering from my room.”

“We don’t bicker.”

“Oh? Calling my sister a slave-driver is friendly?”

I rolled my eyes.

“That’s just how we communicate. And she called me an insect!”

“Well the way you two are going, I’m going to have to put you both in a timeout.”

“...Can you actually do that?”

“Try me.”

She sipped her tea and winked at me. I scowled.

“Getting back to the topic, I’m fine and can come to the meeting.”

“What are we discussing with the committee?”

“Their budget for the upcoming holiday.”

“And the holiday?”

“Hearth’s Warming Eve.”

She stared at me for a moment, taking another sip of tea.

“Alright. You seem coherent enough. But I swear if you snore, Luna’s name-calling will be the least of your worries.”

“Thank you.”

Breakfast arrived and we began eating. The pancakes had powdered sugar on them, resembling some of the snow I’d begun seeing around Canterlot.

“I know I’ve read the stories and everything, but what’s the point of this holiday?”

Celestia paused and looked up.

“To remember the friendships we have in our lives.”

“And you need a whole day to remember them?”

She stared for a few seconds.

“Do changelings not have holidays?”

“I’d never even heard the word ‘holiday’ before a few months ago.”

“So you’ve never celebrated anything?”

“Besides victory over our enemies? No.”

Celestia stood up suddenly.

“This is far more serious than I thought. Here I was just thinking you were being a regular old Snowfall.”

“Come again?”

She came around the table to me.

“I want you to go out into the city and see what everypony has been doing to get ready. Hearth’s Warming Eve is only two days away!”

“What?! But the meeting-“

“Will continue without you. I know you have responsibilities now, but this is a matter of personal growth. I want you to experience the holiday for all that it is. Go out and observe the city. Have some fun!”

“It’s just a bunch of decorations and sweets out there...”

“The very fact that you think that’s all there is to Hearth’s Warming is why you need to do this Shade. I think you’ll thank me when the day is over.”

“The day?! I have to do this all day?!”

Celestia looked down on me with a stern face. Great. She was serious. I backed up a couple paces and sighed.

“Okay.”

Her smile returned.

“Excellent! Have fun!”

————————————

I left the castle and began walking the streets. Ponies were out shopping and laughing. And they were all smiling too. This was bizarre.

“Did everypony get a hit of laughing gas or something?”

Many ponies were carrying bags and gift boxes. Others were out decorating the exteriors of their shops. There was a slight coating of snow on the ground, hoofprints imprinted across the surface. As I looked back and forth, I got a whiff of a nearby bakery. The smell of cinnamon assaulted my nose. I felt my mouth begin to water as the aroma filled my nostrils.

I moved further down the street and music began to fill the air. I followed the sound to its source. There was a group of ponies singing carols on a corner. I stood for a few minutes listening to them. I don’t know why, but I felt a smile form as I listened to a few songs.

The next street had more of the same. The only difference was that every shop along the row was heavily decorated inside and out. The whole street was the very definition of extravagant! Why were these shops so ornate? I looked up at the street sign and realized I was on Diamond Street. Rarity’s boutique was down this way!

I began trotting towards Canterlot Carousel, eager to see how it was decorated. As I made my way down the street, I saw ponies frantically putting up additions to their decor. Why were they in such a hurry?

I arrived at the boutique and was shocked at the sight in front of me.

The outside was bare.

I hurried to the door and opened it. I was even more shocked to find Rarity running around inside, decorations trailing behind her.

“SASSY!! DID YOU PICK UP THAT GOLD RIBBON I SAW LAST WEEK?!”

Sassy Saddles appeared from the back room, decorations following her as well.

“Yes! Here it is!”

A spool of gold ribbon flew across the room. I had to duck to avoid being hit. Sassy noticed me first.

“I’m sorry. We’re closed for the next two hours.”

Rarity chimed in, still focused on hanging the ribbon.

“Don’t turn away customers Sassy! We don’t want to-“

Her head turned and her eyes found me. I was still in a state of mild shock from the scene I was witnessing. Somehow I managed to put on a smile.

“Hello beautiful.”

“Shade! What are you doing here darling?”

“I was walking around town and thought I’d see your decorations. What’s going on?”

She placed the gold ribbon and sighed.

“They moved up the deadline for the Diamond Decoration Dash.”

“The what?”

Sassy gasped.

“The Diamond Decoration Dash! Anypony who is anypony has heard of it!”

I rolled my eyes.

“Do I look like a pony to you?”

Sassy put on a pout, unhappy with my lack of knowledge. I turned back to Rarity, only to find her hanging decorations again. She saw me staring and filled me in.

“The Dash is an annual event. The shop owners of Diamond Street have six hours to decorate their shops inside and out. Whoever has the best display wins the prize.”

“And what’s the prize?”

I ignored the gasp from Sassy. Rarity continued.

“Your storefront featured on the cover of this winter’s catalog!”

“I’m guessing a fashion catalog?”

How many gasps could Sassy have in her?! Rarity nodded.

“The catalog is set to be released in three days. They just need the cover and it’s ready to print.”

“So how much time do you have left?”

She finally spun around to me.

“That’s the problem! The deadline was originally six tonight, but they decided to move it up to noon!”

“You’ve been here since six this morning?!”

“No! I didn’t get the memo about the deadline. Sassy told me when she found out and I rushed over as fast as I could. There’s only two hours left and I’ve barely started!”

I could see tears forming. This was a big deal to her. I looked over at the nearby boxes of decorations and focused. They were engulfed in my magic and began to levitate toward me. I smiled at Rarity as she stared in surprise.

“Where do I start?”

——————————

We worked our tails off. I probably ran a few miles going around in circles in the boutique. We were able to get the interior finished forty minutes after I arrived. The three of us moved outside and went to work on the exterior. My vision became a blur of tinsel and garland.

A bell started ringing as I plugged the lights in. Rarity and Sassy were hyperventilating while I made sure the lights were all on. I heard a voice from down the street.

“Step away from your shops! Step away from your shops!”

Damn! I stepped back, hoping that everything looked good.

I was pleasantly surprised to find that our rush job had turned out well. The shop was trimmed in garland with gold ribbon, colorful decorations, and some silver bells. The windows were bordered with more garland, these featuring tinsel and scented pinecones. And there were lights around everything, giving wonderful pops of color throughout the decor.

Through the windows you could see the interior, where red, green, and white made prominent appearances. And there was a bit of gold ribbon to accent everything inside.

I stood back with Rarity and Sassy, admiring our handiwork.

“Wow. I never noticed how pretty decorations could be.”

Rarity surprised me by pulling me into a hug.

“Thank you so much. We couldn’t have done this without you.”

I returned the hug and kissed her on the cheek.

“Yeah you could.”

She giggled and released me. The ponies of Diamond Street were milling about, congratulating each other on their displays. Rarity and Sassy began to walk along the shops, commenting on their neighbors work. I followed along, listening. It was surprising to find out that, despite the competitive aspect, nopony seemed to be on edge about who would win. They were all just enjoying the decorations.

I began to take in each shop we passed. They were dazzling! Some had lavish decorations that screamed ‘look how rich I am’. Others had tons of color, drawing your eyes to their shop over others. I took it all in, not wanting to miss a single display. It was a bit overwhelming, but I couldn’t help but feel a sense of joy at how everypony got into the spirit.

Rarity continued to congratulate others on their work. She was so genuine in her praise. Ponies were so happy to hear her approval too. And they all said how excited they were to see her display. Watching her made me realize that it wasn’t the competition that was important to her. I had thought she was upset that she’d fallen behind and wouldn’t win, but it was less petty than that. She’d been upset that she might miss out on participating in one of the big events of the year. She didn’t want to be left out.

We began to make our way back towards the boutique. Ponies were starting to migrate that way to view the rest of the shops. We beat the majority of the crowd and Rarity was there to greet ponies as they approached. Sassy and I stood back as ponies congratulated Rarity on a job well done.

“Oh thank you! But I couldn’t have done it without my friends.”

She looked back at us, her smile making me a little weak in the knees.

Sassy moved forward to talk to some of the passing ponies. I continued to stay back, letting Rarity have her moment.

“I say Rarity! You’ve gone with the traditional look. Though that is the easiest choice when it’s your first year.”

I leaned over to see around Rarity. Some posh pony was making quite the show of commenting on the decor. Rarity’s smile had faded a little.

“I don’t know if it’s quite traditional. I’ve added a little of my own flair to it.”

“I see! You definitely have a flair for subtlety. And it almost seems like you threw it together last minute!”

Rarity’s smile was gone now. I didn’t like that. I took a step forward, but Rarity wasn’t finished.

“Well I suppose that subtlety isn’t everypony’s style. I chose to let my boutique shine through the decor. I saw that you took a different approach. I could hardly see your shop past the ice sculptures you had.”

Wait...there had been a shop behind that sculpture garden?

I could see that the pony was taken aback. And it seemed the crowd agreed that Rarity had won the standoff. But then Miss Posh had one final jab.

“I’d hardly expect a small town pony to understand the grandeur of Canterlot decor. But you shouldn’t feel bad. I’m sure you’ll learn...eventually.”

In that moment, a plan popped into my head. I don’t know how I came up with it so fast, but I put it right into play. I moved around the crowd until I was facing the boutique. Then I began to push through the crowd gently.

“So sorry! Pardon me. May I sneak through?”

I broke through the front of the mass, causing everypony to look at me. I smiled at Rarity and, using a little of my changeling magic, put on my best Canterlot accent.

“There you are darling! I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

I made a show of looking over the shop.

“Marvelous!"

"Darling!"

"Exquisite!!"

I turned to Rarity with as much flourish as I could muster.

"This is exactly what we’ve been looking for! Celestia has grown tired of the same old holiday decor. I told her that we should go for something simple, yet elegant. And you’ve done it! The Princess will be so pleased to know the castle’s holiday decor is in good hooves.”

Ponies couldn’t begin whispering fast enough. I could tell they were impressed by my show. There were only two ponies that reacted differently. The posh pony was annoyed that her spotlight had been stolen. And Rarity was staring at me, trying not to laugh.

After a minute, the posh pony stomped away into the crowd. Soon the whispers ceased and everypony began milling about again. I approached Rarity and kissed her on the cheek.

“Not too bad, huh?”

Whoops. Forgot to change my voice back. I ended the spell and cleared my throat.

“Not too bad, huh?”

Much better! Rarity giggled.

“When did you become such a good actor?”

“Your dramatic flair has rubbed off on me I guess.”

Sassy walked over to us.

“An impressive performance. I wouldn’t have guessed a castle messenger could be so convincing.”

Rarity smiled, her eyes still locked on me.

“He’s not a messenger Sassy. That’s just another character. He’s Celestia’s advisor.”

Sassy stared at me for a few moments before responding.

“Advisor? I didn’t know she...”

Her eyes grew bigger.

“You’re him, aren’t you?”

Rarity turned to Sassy.

“Him? What do you mean?”

“Rarity! Don’t tell me you haven’t heard the rumors?”

“It’s Canterlot dear, there’s a mountain of rumors.”

“I know, but the big rumor that’s spreading is about a mysterious pony in the castle who’s become close with the Princesses. They trust him so much that they gave him the most prestigious position available.”

She turned to me, her eyes looking over every part of me.

“They call him The Right Hoof, as in the right hoof of Celestia and Luna. He’s said to be the most powerful and influential pony besides the Princesses themselves!”

Rarity looked back at me, her eyes filled with wonder and confusion.

“Is that true?”

I shrugged.

“Well...I don’t know if I’m that powerful and influential...”

Rarity just stared at me while Sassy fanned herself with her hoof.

“I’m so sorry if I was ever rude! I didn’t know who you were.”

I looked around, making sure nopony was listening.

“It’s okay Miss Saddles. I keep a low profile. And I’d like it kept that way.”

“Of course! My lips are sealed.”

I turned to Rarity.

“Would you like to go for a walk? I’ve been meaning to see some more of the city.”

She smiled and nodded.

We said goodbye to Sassy and left Diamond Street. As we made our way through the streets of Canterlot, it began to snow. I looked up at the snowflakes, letting them fall against my face. I could feel Rarity watching me.

“Have you never seen snow?”

“Not like this. It’s wonderful.”

“I was just thinking. This is your first Hearth’s Warming, isn’t it?”

I nodded.

“Celestia wanted me to get out today and really get into the spirit of things.”

“And have you?”

“The Dash definitely gave me a new appreciation for decorations.”

“There’s more than that you know.”

“Funny. Celestia said the same thing.”

Rarity smiled and grabbed my hoof.

“Come on. What you need is a hot chocolate. Nothing gets you into the spirit like cocoa”

I let her lead me down the street. We came to a cafe that smelled of chocolate and cinnamon. Rarity ordered two hot chocolates for us and we sat down to wait. As we sat at our table, a couple of fillies ran by, throwing snowballs at each other. They were giggling away as they attempted to hit one another.

As the fillies ran off and our hot chocolates arrived, the carolers I’d seen earlier came around the corner. The pony leading the group was singing a solo as the rest hummed.

When I see the twinkling lights so bright
It reminds me of that lovely night
You made me warm beyond compare
Two lovers, young, without a care
You looked so fair by firelight
And gave me one last kiss goodnight
So by the mantle I will prepare
The Eve doll of my lady fair
We press against each other tight
And celebrate with joy so bright
Hearth’s Warming Eve is here tonight!

I sipped my cocoa and sighed.

“I didn’t know that there could be so much joy in the world.”

Rarity held out her hoof and I grabbed it gently. The snow continued to fall as we drank. I was beginning to understand what Celestia and Rarity were talking about. All of these ponies sharing the spirit of friendship with each other. It was an amazing thing. Their friendships were stronger because of the shared experiences brought on by the holiday. And that was something they got to share every year.

I smiled as I realized that I now had my own Hearth’s Warming memories. And I would get to form more over the next couple days. I looked at Rarity.

“You heading back to Ponyville soon?”

She had that soft smile that I loved so much.

“That depends...what are you doing Hearth’s Warming Eve?”

I returned her smile.

“Hopefully spending it with you. If you don’t mind staying.”

She scooted around the table and leaned against me.

“I’d love nothing more.”

I sighed in content as we continued watching the snow fall. This whole holiday thing wasn’t too bad after all.

Planning

The holiday came and went. I wished it could have gone on forever. Celestia and Luna had been excited to have Rarity join them for Hearth’s Warming Eve. The four of us played games, sang songs, and shared stories of past holidays.

The only bad part was putting up with the two alicorns. They kept throwing me glances as Rarity and I stayed near each other. Every time I said something to her they were passing looks between one another. I wanted to cover their heads with a sheet so I didn’t have to deal with their mischievous grins.

When the holiday came to an end, I sadly let Rarity go home. I walked her to the train station and saw her off.

“I wish we could see each other more.”

“I know darling. I do too.”

“When do you think you’ll be back in town?”

“Soon hopefully.”

“Well what do you say to an official date next time you’re here?”

I got a big smile out of her with that question. She pulled me close and kissed me. It seemed to last forever. When we broke apart I was in a daze.

“So was that a yes?”

She giggled and kissed me again as the train whistle blew.

I walked back to the castle feeling light as a feather. And unfortunately I returned to two nosy Princesses. Celestia was the first to jump me.

“So what happened?”

Luna pressed against her sister.

“Did you kiss goodbye?”

I groaned at the two sisters.

“Are you both fillies? Why is my love life any concern of yours?”

Luna pouted.

“You’re our friend. Why shouldn’t we show interest?”

Celestia was beaming.

“It’s just nice to see you so close to somepony.”

I sighed as we all walked through the throne room.

“Honestly you two. You’re just living vicariously through me, aren’t you?”

“Now why would we do that?”

“You both need to find stallions of your own.”

Luna shrugged.

“Why do that when we can just pester you instead?”

I shook my head and sighed again.

“You two are going to be the death of me.”

——————————

Days went by as I waited for a scroll from Rarity. I attended meetings with Celestia, continued my reading, and spent half-nights practicing magic with Luna. I was beginning to get a better grasp of basic spells, but even using them throughout my day was proving little help. The buildup in my body was already at a point that even casting spells all day wasn’t discharging enough energy. I’d need to learn some more powerful spells if I hoped to lose some of the excess energy. And the headaches were back as if that wasn’t enough to worry about.

It was a warm, sunny day when I finally received a scroll. I was out walking in the gardens, enjoying a few minutes peace when a guard approached me.

“This just arrived for you sir.”

I yanked the scroll from his hooves and smiled.

“Finally! I mean...thank you.”

The guard nodded and retreated towards the castle. I unrolled the scroll, eager to see what it said.

Dear Shade,

A scroll arrived for you a few minutes ago. You’d better come get it before Luna or I read it for you!

Celestia

“I’m going to kill her. That’s all there is to it.”

I crumpled up the scroll and ran back to the castle. I’d have to figure out my revenge later.

The halls were a blur as I sped through them. I got to Celestia’s study and threw the door open. Celestia was sitting behind her desk, reading a book.

“Could you be a little more careful? Those doors are nearly as old as I am.”

“Where is it you sadistic mare?!”

Her brow raised as her eyes met mine.

“It? Oh! Your scroll. Of course.”

She produced the scroll and I grabbed it with my magic. She chuckled as the scroll flew towards me.

“Honestly Shade. I wasn’t going to read it.”

“I know. But that other scroll was cruel.”

“Take it up with Luna. It was her idea.”

I rolled my eyes as I opened what I was hoping was the right scroll this time.

Dear Shade,

I’ll be in Canterlot in two days and free after 4 o’clock. I leave the rest to you.”

Yours, Rarity

I swallowed. The rest was up to me? What was that supposed to mean?!

“You seem worried.”

“Huh? Me? Of course not!”

“You’re a horrible liar.”

“Well...Rarity wants me to decide what we’re going to do for our date.”

“What’s so troubling about that? You’ve done a few things with her when she’s been in Canterlot.”

“I know but...the way she wrote it...it’s all up to me..”

“And that worries you?”

“Damn right it does! What do I do to prepare?!”

“Surely you’ve read something that can help?”

“Not really. Novels that have characters courting one another, yes. Actual advice? Zero.”

Celestia giggled.

“Courting? I haven’t heard it called that in ages.”

“Whatever. The point is that I’m clueless.”

“Hmm...perhaps we need another head for this.”

“No don’t call-“

“Luna!”

The study door opened to reveal the blue alicorn. I frowned.

“How long have you been standing there?”

She wore a sheepish grin.

“Long enough to know you fell for my prank?”

I huffed at her and turned back to Celestia.

“Not to insult the knowledge of your Majestys, but neither of you knows anything about dating.”

“Maybe we don’t have much personal experience, but we have over a thousand years of knowledge. I’m sure some of it will be relevant.”

A sigh left me as I sat down.

“Okay. I’ll bite.”

Luna came around and sat next to Celestia.

“You want your date to go well, right? We can help!”

“How?”

Her smile grew.

“Well first you need to pick an activity. I know that much!”

An activity...

“From stories I’ve read, it seems a meal is pretty common.”

Celestia began to smile as well.

“Perfect! That’s a good choice for a first date. Where do you want to take her?”

“Um...there’s a nice place downtown. But that’s outside my price range. In fact...I don’t have a price range at all.”

Luna looked confused.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t have money.”

Luna slowly turned to Celestia.

“You never told him about his salary?”

It was Celestia’s turn to look confused.

“Well...I thought it was implied...”

My eyes grew bigger.

“Salary? As in..money earned for performing a job?”

They looked at me and Luna nodded.

“Yes Shade. Everypony in the castle earns bits for their work. Apparently my sister didn’t think that you, a pony that’s never held a job or dealt with a monetary system, would automatically know you were getting paid to be our advisor.”

Celestia’s face began to turn red with embarrassment. She hid her face and groaned.

“I’m so sorry Shade.”

I took a deep breath.

“It’s okay. But...how much am I getting paid? And how much do I have so far?”

Celestia looked up again, her face beginning to return to its normal color.

“Twice the national average with...two months of backpay due?”

My eyes nearly popped out of my skull.

“What am I supposed to do with that much money?!”

Luna shrugged.

“Spend it, save it, place some bets-”

Celestia covered her sister’s mouth.

“I can get an account opened for you with the bank in town. They handle the accounts for all the ponies under our employ. But for now I can get you the bits you’ll need for tonight.”

I nodded.

“Thank you! That means I just need to get a reservation now!”

“What’s the restaurant called?”

“Let’s see...I think it’s...La Lune?”

Luna’s eyes bugged out and she removed Celestia’s hoof.

“La Lune?! The rooftop restaurant downtown?!”

“That’s the one! You know it?”

“It’s inspired by my night and the moon! And it’s one of the fanciest restaurants in Canterlot. Did Rarity mention that to you?”

“I think so...yeah! She said she hoped to go there one day because of how...exclusive it is...Damn.”

Luna rolled her eyes.

“And you have how long?”

“Two days.”

Luna shook her head and looked at Celestia.

“Back to square one.”

Celestia looked thoughtful.

“Perhaps not. I have an idea. Though...it’s not an entirely honest one.”

Luna and I began to smile at the same time. I leaned forward.

“You have a slightly dishonest plan?”

“Is it such a shock that I have a rebellious streak?”

Luna tried to keep herself from giggling.

“Since when?”

“Do you want to hear my idea or not?”

I leaned forward even more.

“Don’t leave me in suspense Celestia! Tell me!”

A grin grew on her face as she began to divulge her “rebellious” plan.

———————————

That evening I prepared a scroll.

Rarity,

I’ve got everything planned out and can’t wait for you to be here. I’m excited for you to see what I prepared. By the way, bring something nice to wear. There’s a dress code where we’re going.

Shade

I rolled the scroll up and walked out to my balcony. Luna had taught me a spell to send scrolls recently, but this was my first time really using it long distance. I concentrated on the destination and the scroll disappeared into the air. I was left looking at the stars.

My smile wouldn’t go away as I thought of my upcoming date. More than anything though, I was excited to see Rarity again. It was getting harder to say goodbye every time she went back to Ponyville. I hoped that we could fix that someday.

I heard a burst of magic above me and looked up. A scroll! It descended to me and I opened it.

It’s a date.

Love, Rarity

I stared at the parchment in shock. Had she meant to write that? Surely it was a mistake... Then again...what if it wasn’t?

I felt a warm wave wash over me. I’d never felt anything like it. This was different than any emotion I’d felt before. I felt my whole body tremble slightly. It was as if my body were trying to explode. And just when I couldn’t take it anymore-

“Ouch!”

I lifted a hoof to my head. Damn headaches. They’d be the death of me. I tried to recapture the feeling from before, but it had dissipated for the most part. There was just a warm feeling surrounding my heart. I could feel the organ beating in my chest. The pieces fell into place as I realized what was happening.

I was feeling love.

A smile crept back to my face as I sat under the night sky. I was actually feeling love, not consuming somepony else’s. It was the most wonderful sensation I’d ever felt in my life.

The next day I went to attempt a last minute reservation. I wasn't normally one for lying, but this was more like stretching the truth. At least that was my take on it.

The entrance to La Lune was an alley between two unassuming buildings. From what Luna had told me, the buildings housed the kitchen. The rest of the restaurant was entirely on the roof. I walked up the stairs to the rooftop. There was a stand at the top of the stairs with a mare behind it.

“I’m sorry. We aren’t open quite yet. How can I help you sir?”

I swallowed hard. It was time to see if Celestia’s plan would work. I altered my voice, throwing on my Canterlot accent.

“I’ve been sent to find a suitable location for an upcoming event. This establishment is one my employer wishes to consider, but wanted a firsthoof opinion. Unfortunately they couldn’t make it, so I’m here to craft a recommendation.”

“And the name on the reservation?”

“That’s the problem. A reservation was never made it seems. Though that’s not surprising with all the meetings he has to attend. It probably slipped his mind while one of the Princesses was asking him his opinion on- Oh! Forget I said that!”

I could tell I had piqued her interest.

“He works with the Princesses?”

I began to act panicky.

“Please don’t say anything! If the Right Hoof knew that I- Oh no! Forget I said that! Curse my lips!”

That did it. The pony’s eyes had grown to the size of saucers.

“Could you wait here for a moment sir?

She disappeared for a few minutes. Celestia’s elaborate story was working so far! I couldn’t believe she’d come up with such a lie so quickly. The mare reappeared leading a stallion towards me. The stallion had a big smile.

“Welcome to La Lune my friend! I understand this is a special visit?”

I smiled back.

“Yes. I’ve been sent to scout out a location for-“

I looked around as if to make sure we were alone. I leaned closer to the stallion and whispered.

“Princess Celestia’s birthday. The Right Hoof is setting up a surprise for her.”

The stallion’s eyes were sparkling.

“And he wants to use my restaurant?!”

“Quite possibly yes. He wanted to see it for himself, but unfortunately couldn’t make it. So he sent me in his place. I’m to report if this establishment meets his expectations. But I wasn’t aware that he forgot to make the reservation-“

“Say no more my friend! I’m sure he was far too busy to worry about such a small thing. I will personally make sure you have a table tonight!”

I shook my head.

“I wouldn’t want to inconvenience you! Nor take a table away from somepony who has a proper reservation.”

“It’s no trouble. We can squeeze one more table up here!”

“Well...if you’re sure. Would it be an inconvenience if I brought a companion? I hate to eat alone.”

He chuckled.

“So do I. Of course you can!”

He turned to the mare.

“Put down a party of two. What’s the name?”

“Shadow Hoof. I’ll be back at 6:30.”

“Excellent! I’m sure we’ll meet your expectations!”

I thanked the stallion and began to descend the stairs. A sigh escaped me halfway down and I whispered under my breath.

“Thank Celestia that worked! Literally!”

I had done everything just as the Princess had described. It was a bald-faced lie, but it had gotten me a table at the most exclusive restaurant in town!

“Joke’s on you though Celestia. Now I’m actually going to have your surprise birthday here.”

I chuckled to myself. Her lie was going to become very true to her shock. Payback for that fake scroll.

A New Suit

The day came and I could barely hold still. Rarity was in town! I attended meetings as usual, but couldn’t help looking at the clock every few minutes. Celestia teased me for the first bit, but teasing turned to annoyance after the first couple hours.

“The clock isn’t going to move any faster Shade.”

I sighed turning back around in my seat.

“I know, I know.”

“Honestly! I know you’re anxious, but this is a bit much. I dare say you’re worse than Twilight when the library opened its last wing.”

I scowled at her.

“Well you can’t blame me. I’m still not sure your idea is going to work.”

“It will work. You just have to trust me.”

“You want me to lie.”

“Nothing you haven’t done before. I seem to remember you telling me that you named Rarity our new holiday decorator?”

“That was just to get somepony off her back. This is different.”

“Fine. Don’t trust my idea. Do something else. I’m sure you can find something just as special on your own.”

“I probably could! It would save me the embarrassment too.”

Celestia rolled her eyes.

“It’s a date Shade. From what I’ve heard, embarrassment is built into most of them.”

I mumbled under my breath about her dating experience and she punched me in the shoulder. I began rubbing it immediately.

“Okay, okay. But if it blows up in my face, you get to remember for the rest of time that it was your idea.”

——————————

Four o’clock finally came and I raced out of the castle. I felt like I was flying through the streets of Canterlot. I made my way towards Diamond Street, my heart beating faster with every stride.

I slowed down as I came up to Rarity’s. She was in the window, adjusting a mannequin. I waved to get her attention and she looked up from her work. Her smile could have lit up the whole street. I entered the boutique and she jumped down from the window.

“You’re awfully punctual!”

“I seem to remember a certain pony telling me she preferred punctuality?”

“Very true.”

I stepped up and pulled her into my hooves, planting a kiss before she could say anything else. I actually felt her body sink into me a little. A sigh escaped her as I broke our lips apart.

“Goodness! I didn’t mean to interrupt anything. I can leave if you want Rarity.”

We both turned to see Sassy averting her gaze. I smiled.

“Don’t worry Sassy. I’m actually taking her away from here for the evening.”

Rarity quickly pushed away from me.

“Now just a moment! You said we needed to look our best, yes?”

I nodded.

“Yeah. There’s a dress code where we’re going.”

“Then you have to leave so I can get ready!”

“Wait. Really?”

She began to push me towards the door.

“And I’m sure you need to get ready as well. I can’t wait to see you in a suit! I can only imagine how handsome you’ll be. What time is our reservation?”

“Um...6:30?”

“Oh my! That’s cutting it a little short!”

“It’s over two hours!”

“Exactly! Sassy Saddles, I think I’ll need your help.”

Rarity got me out the door and slammed it behind me. Was putting on a dress really going to take that long? I mean, clothes didn’t seem that complicated. I’m sure it wouldn’t take long for me to put on...

“Tartarus! How could I have forgotten the suit?!”

I began to pace back and forth, pondering my dilemma. Where could I get a suit on such short notice?

I froze and looked up and down Diamond Street.

“Right. I’m in the heart of the fashion district. I’d better find somepony fast.”

I hurried along the shops, looking in the windows. Most of these places seemed too fancy. I just needed a suit! I was getting close to the end of Diamond Street when I came across a mallet shop set between two large boutiques. There was a suit in the window!

“Perfect!”

I raced in, a little bell on the door ringing as I entered the shop. A voice called from the back.

“Just a moment!”

I was dancing in place, my anxiety building by the second. After what seemed like an eternity, a unicorn appeared from the back.

“How can I help-“

His eyes found me. I froze.

“-you?”

The unicorn slowed his pace.

“Forgive my bluntness but...what do you want?”

My anxiety was contributing to my now-growing headache. I wanted to leave. No! I had to see this through!

“I...need a...suit.”

“I figured as much. I don’t mean to be blunt, but I’m not sure my suits will be within your...range?”

Range? Oh...

“That shouldn’t be a problem. I’m on the Royal Staff.”

He looked me up and down for a moment. I could tell he wasn’t entirely convinced. What could I do? I needed his help!

Wait! If words didn’t convince him, then there was only one thing that could. But I didn’t have my saddlebag or bitpouch with me... Maybe... No it wouldn’t work. I’d never done that much distance. But still...

I closed my eyes and concentrated. I felt my horn begin to tingle as the spell began. I focused on my target, hoping that I wasn’t about to kill myself.

The unicorn sounded annoyed now.

“Look, I’m very busy. If this is some sort of joke I’m not amused at all. Would you please-“

‘POP!’

I opened my eyes to find my bitpouch floating in front of me. It had worked! I allowed the pouch to float to the floor and looked at the unicorn.

“I need a suit as fast as possible. I’ve got a date that I can’t miss. How much will it cost me?”

The unicorn looked from me to the pouch and back again.

“Well...how fast exactly?”

“Less than two hours.”

“Hmm...I suppose it’s doable. Step over in front of the mirrors.”

I walked over to a set of mirrors on one wall. The unicorn pulled out a measuring tape and began wrapping it around different parts of me. I flinched every time the tape touched me.

“Hold still! I won’t get proper measurements otherwise.”

“Sorry. It’s my first time getting something like this.”

The unicorn stood up straight.

“I take it you’re not from Canterlot?”

“Obviously.”

He sighed.

“And you’re just barely buying a suit for...a date?”

“Yeah. I know. I’m stupid.”

“Well at least you realize that much.”

He continued taking measurements.

“Your body size isn’t too far off from some slimmer stallions. I think I might have something that could work in back. It will just need some alterations. That should speed this process up.”

He stepped back as his horn lit up. Something came out of the back room and settled in the center of the shop. It was a mannequin with a suit. I watched as the unicorn began making the adjustments. He didn’t look at me once as he worked, so I was surprised when he addressed me.

“How did you do that earlier?”

“What?”

“The bits. You made them appear like magic.”

“Well it was magic.”

I parted my mane and motioned to my stump of a horn. The unicorn looked shocked for a second before returning to his work.

“I’ve never seen a horn like yours before. Has it always been that short?”

“Nah. I didn’t like the length. So I made it shorter.”

He paused again. But this time he began laughing.

“Oh! That’s a good one. Made it shorter!”

What was so funny about that?

“Most of your measurements, like I said, line up with slimmer stallions, but you definitely have a few abnormal ones as well. They’re almost...non-pony.”

Oh boy..

“I was...sick a lot when I was little. Right from birth actually. I guess you could say I’m a bit abnormal overall.”

“Ah. That explains it. I don’t mean to be rude of course!”

That was close.

“Not at all. I’ve grown accustomed to it.”

The unicorn stood back from the suit.

“I think we’re almost there. It just needs a bit of color.”

He looked at me, looking over every part. His eyes locked with mine and he smiled.

“A little blue to compliment your eyes.”

I smiled.

“Sounds perfect.”

He produced a bow tie and put it around the mannequin’s neck. He nodded in approval and removed the suit from the dummy.

“Only move when I tell you.”

I followed his instructions as he helped slip the suit on. I had put clothes on before when helping Rarity, but this was one of the first items of clothing I could really call my own. I didn’t want to ruin it. Especially before tonight.

The unicorn finished and grabbed the bow tie. He tied it around my neck and smiled.

“There! You’re ready for your date!”

I looked in the mirrors, my eyes widening.

“Is that really me?”

“Of course! My suits always make the stallions second guess themselves. It really makes you look like an entirely different pony!”

“I hope not. I want her to recognize me.”

He laughed again.

“You have quite the sense of humor!”

I smiled, still admiring my reflection.

“Thank you...I’m so sorry. I never got your name.”

“Bobby Pin at your service Mr...”

I knew I didn’t want to give my real name, so I’d been giving it some thought what I would say to ponies for the foreseeable future. And I felt I’d come up with a good alias.

“Shadow Hoof.”

“Mr. Shadow Hoof! I’m glad I could help you.”

I grabbed my bitpouch and dumped out a generous pile. Bobby Pin’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.

“That’s a bit much! Don’t tell me you’re new to money as well.”

“Sorry. I don’t buy things for myself very often. A lot gets provided to the Staff.”

He looked at me as I returned some of the bits to the pouch.

“So you’re really on the Royal Staff?”

The other part of my alias. Not too far from the truth, but enough to satisfy myself.

“I’m one of the Right Hoof’s assistants.”

I feigned shock.

“Horsefeathers! I shouldn’t have said that.”

Bobby Pin seemed intrigued by my statement.

“Really? I’ve heard some interesting things about the Right Hoof. Perhaps you could confirm a few things?”

“I don’t know if I should...”

“Just one then?”

“Well...I guess it wouldn’t hurt... Just between us?”

“Of course!”

That was a lie if I’d ever heard one.

Bobby Pin stepped closer.

“I heard the Right Hoof is actually a shadow creature created by Nightmare Moon back in the day. And now he’s come to serve the Sisters since Luna is still his master.”

I began laughing.

“I’ve not heard that one before!”

Bobby Pin waited in anticipation as I calmed down.

“No. He’s not a shadow creature. He’s very much like anypony. Princess Celestia and Luna employ him based on Princess Twilight’s recommendation.”

I leaned in a bit.

“But that’s what I was told by others. I personally think they keep him close because he’s an enemy spy that defected to our side.”

A risk? Yes. But a thrilling one! And if I mixed in some truth with all these rumors, nopony would ever know what to believe. Bobby Pin had saucers for eyes at this point.

“Really?”

“Well...that’s just my own theory. I really don’t know for sure.”

He was beaming from ear to ear.

“How exciting! I wonder if we’ll ever know the whole story behind that pony.”

“Maybe one day. Thank you for the suit again. It looks amazing!”

“Of course! I hope your date goes well. And if you or any of the other Staff members need suits, make sure to let them know where you got the best service!”

I nodded and exited the shop. I was ready for my date now! I sauntered down Diamond Street towards Rarity's boutique, feeling like a million bits in my new suit.

First Date, Last Secret, New Love

I knocked on the door of the boutique. Sassy Saddles answered and smiled.

“Prompt as usual I see. Rarity is nearly ready. You’re welcome to wait in the front here.”

She stepped aside and I entered the boutique. I began looking over the clothes hanging around the store. She’d really done remarkable work.

“Ahem.”

I turned around and nearly fell over in surprise.

“Wow!”

Rarity was wearing a sleek, violet dress. It almost matched her mane color perfectly. I couldn’t help but notice how the dress hugged her body. I thought it odd at first since we didn’t normally wear clothes, but somehow that dress only made me admire her form more.

“See something you like?”

I shook my head to clear it, realizing I’d been staring a little too long. Rarity giggled as she approached me.

“Don’t be embarrassed darling. I can’t help but stare at you myself. I knew you’d look good in a suit.”

She adjusted my tie and smiled.

“You’re handsome either way, but clothes can really make the stallion.”

I smiled back.

“I doubt anypony will be looking at me tonight. Not when you look like an angel.”

Her cheeks turned red, making me smile even more. She pushed her hoof against my chest.

“Stop it! I can’t go out if I look flustered.”

I chuckled.

“That would be a shame. Especially after I got that reservation.”

“Where are we going?”

“Don’t you want it to be a surprise?”

She thought for a moment and smiled.

“No. Tell me!”

I laughed.

“Very well. Ever heard of a place called La Lune?”

Rarity’s jaw dropped and I heard Sassy spitting out her tea. The shoppony rushed over, her eyes bulging.

“La Lune?! The most exclusive restaurant in all of Canterlot?!”

I nodded.

“The same.”

“But you have to reserve a table months in advance! Possibly more than a year!”

Rarity regained her senses and chimed in.

“Surely you didn’t have a reservation all this time!”

A smile crept across my face.

“Well...I might have made some promises to the owner...”

Both mares leaned in, waiting for me to continue. I rolled my eyes.

“I get a table as long as they get to host Celestia’s birthday.”

Rarity narrowed her eyes.

“You bribed the owner?”

“Not really. I just suggested that his restaurant was the front runner for birthday locations. He offered the table at that point. That’s what Celestia figured would happen.”

“Wait...Celestia suggested this?”

“Yeah. I didn’t think it would work honestly, but here we are!”

Rarity’s smile returned.

“I can’t believe you’d throw your influence around like that. But at the same time...it’s a little sweet that you went to so much effort for me.”

Sassy stood back and frowned.

“I’m still waiting on my reservation.”

I chuckled.

“I wish I could help, but I’m pretty sure I’ve already pressed my luck for today.”

We said goodbye to Sassy and left the boutique. Rarity stayed right by me as we made our way towards La Lune. She kept glancing at me from the corner of her eye. I only knew this because I was doing the same. After we caught each other a few times, I smiled.

“Maybe we should just look at each other?”

“Oh no darling! That would be too forward.”

“Well there’s something to be said for the direct approach.”

“That’s true, but being direct can get you in trouble sometimes.”

“Is that a warning?”

“Not necessarily. I know you tend to be a bit more forward than most ponies. You could attempt some subtlety when we’re in public though. I’d hate for you to say what’s on your mind within earshot of anypony.”

“Oh? And what’s on my mind that shouldn’t be said in public?”

“Well the way your eyes keep darting over my body speaks volumes.”

I felt my face get hot as I stared straight ahead. Rarity was giggling at my expense.

“Just a tip for tonight. I’d hate for you to embarrass yourself is all.”

I felt my face cool down as we approached the stairs to the restaurant. I allowed Rarity to ascend first, following right behind. I had to fight myself not to stare at her rear.

We reached the roof and the same mare was at the stand. She smiled as she saw me.

“Mr. Shadow Hoof! Welcome back. We have your table right over here.”

The mare led us to a table on the edge of the roof. It had a stunning view of the castle. I thanked the mare and pulled out Rarity’s seat.

“M’lady.”

Rarity smiled.

“Such a gentleman!”

She sat down and I took my own seat. A waiter appeared, placing a basket of bread on the table.

“I will be your server this evening. If there is anything you need, please don’t hesitate to ask.”

I looked up at the waiter. He had a big smile on, but I could tell he was tense.

“Uh-huh... I’m guessing the owner clued you in?”

“Uh...sorry sir?”

My brow raised as I continued looking at the pony. He swallowed.

“Yes sir. I’m supposed to get whatever you’d like for tonight.”

“Well I’m sure we’ll need a few minutes. You can check on your other tables.”

“Well...you’re my only table, sir.”

Oh boy. I sighed.

“Okay. Listen closely.”

The waiter leaned in as I lowered my voice.

“Let him know I’m already impressed. And that I don’t need a private server tonight. We want to blend in with the rest of the guests.”

The pony straightened up and nodded.

“I’ll let him know sir. And I’ll return for your order when you’re ready.”

“Thank you.”

He left the table and I returned my gaze to Rarity. She was staring at me in awe.

“You really do command a lot of respect, don’t you?”

“I suppose. I don’t really feel like I do anything amazing to deserve it.”

“But you’re...”

She looked around at the nearby ponies. I knew what she was getting at. I nodded.

“Yes I know. But honestly, it’s still all a little surreal to me. It’s a strange thing having ponies do what I ask of them. Especially since I’m not one of them.”

“You know, you can’t keep playing that card forever.”

“What do you mean?”

“The ‘I’m not a pony’ card. You’re honestly more pony than changeling at this point.”

“Tell that to my magic. I’m still working on the most basic spells.”

“How have your lessons been going?”

“About as well as they can. The only problem is that the spells in practicing don’t use much energy. And the buildup isn’t getting any better. I’ll need to learn some complex spells if I plan on dispelling all the excess.”

“Do you still get your headaches?”

“Closer to migraines at this point.”

“I’m sorry. That can’t be good for your other duties.”

“I make do. What about you? I’m sure you must deal with a ton managing two boutiques.”

She rolled her eyes.

“Don’t remind me. Business is higher than ever. That’s good of course, but it’s tiring. I’ll have to start hiring some more ponies to keep up with my orders.”

I stared at her as she talks about the last couple days of work. I found my gaze locked on her eyes. They were sparkling as the sun set. Before long the moon was rising as the staff lit lanterns around the restaurant.

The waiter came and took our order. After he left, Rarity took a long breath.

“Forgive me. I should let you talk too.”

I smiled.

“That’s okay. I like hearing about you.”

She leaned forward, returning the smile.

“Well tell me more about you.”

“There’s not much to tell.”

“Oh really, Mr. Shadow Hoof?”

I rolled my eyes.

“Well I have to have an alias while I’m out in public.”

She giggled.

“Well what about before all of this? What were you like when you were younger?”

My smile faded.

“You don’t want to hear about that. Nothing happy in those memories.”

She put her hoof out and rested it on mine. I looked back into her eyes and she smiled.

“Please?”

I took a deep breath.

“Well...you already know how old I am. I hatched and was mostly raised by the older changelings in the hive. Chrysalis had been in power for...thirty years by that point. The changelings from before her time served her well, but she wanted fully loyal subjects. So...that’s when she decided to begin having children.”

“So...the younger changelings? The force that attacked Canterlot?”

I nodded.

“Most of them are hers. Different fathers across the board, but all the same mother.”

“And you were born before that?”

I stayed silent. This was the one thing I’d never revealed to anypony, not even Celestia. As my silence grew, so did Rarity’s eyes.

“So you’re...”

I closed my eyes.

“I’m not just one of her children. I was...her firstborn.”

“Firstborn... That essentially makes you a prince, doesn’t it?”

“I doubt that’s how she sees it. But she did think it was enough to make me her top lieutenant. I’m actually the one that planned most of the invasion.”

Her jaw dropped a little. I raised a hoof.

“Before you say anything, I’ve told Celestia about my part in that.”

“Did you tell her about Chrysalis?”

I shook my head.

“You’re the first pony I’ve admitted that to.”

“But..why wouldn’t you say anything?”

“The first son of Chrysalis? Yeah, that shouldn’t make my life too difficult.”

“I’m serious Shade.”

I glanced at her face. She had this stern expression that made me feel guilty. A sigh escaped me.

“It’s more trouble than it’s worth. Besides...she never treated me like a son. I thought maybe being her firstborn would mean something, but she barely treated me better than the other changelings. Sometimes worse.”

“Surely she must have felt something for you. You’re her first child. I don’t see how anypony couldn’t love their child.”

“That’s the great changeling paradox. We can take love, but giving it? Not a strong point.”

A small smile formed on her lips.

“You don’t seem to have any trouble with me.”

I chuckled.

“I guess that’s true. Though I don’t know why you like me at all. I’m just some creature that crash-landed in everypony’s life.”

Her smile disappeared.

“Don’t talk down about yourself like that. You mean a lot more than you know. And I like you because you’re an honest, charming stallion. Yes, stallion.”

The waiter appeared with our food and we began to eat. I kept looking at Rarity throughout the meal. She’d glance up every so often as well. I paused in my eating after a few minutes. I flashed a mischievous grin towards Rarity.

“If I’m such a catch, then why did it take you so long to kiss me?”

She nearly dropped her fork as her cheeks turned a cute shade of pink.

“Well..that’s...it’s not really a lady’s place to make the first move.”

“Says who?”

“Everypony! Society! It’s just...a thing.”

“And yet you still kissed me first.”

Her brow furrowed.

“Well of course I did. You weren’t doing anything about it.”

“A shame. If I’d caught on quicker we’d probably be on our third or fourth date by now. Possibly even a relationship”

“Well this might be our first official date, but I’d say we’ve been dating for a bit. We’ve gotten meals together, spent plenty of time around each other, and write back and forth regularly. That sounds like the beginning of a relationship to me.”

My brain couldn’t process what I’d just heard. I just sat there staring for a solid minute before I finally found the words.

“So...we’re dating?”

Rarity smiled.

“If that’s alright with you.”

“Of course! It’s just...I didn’t realize!”

“Why doesn’t that surprise me?”

Not wanting to risk sounding more foolish, I began eating again. Rarity smiled and returned to her meal as well. We were silent for several minutes, each enjoying the delicious food. When we both finished we looked at each other again. I smiled.

“So...how long have we been dating exactly?”

“Hmm...a little bit after our first kiss I’d say.”

“Okay. So it’s been some time. As long as we have our stories straight.”

“Do you have any other plans for us?”

“Actually...not really. Though if you’re up for it, I’d love to show you around the castle. I can show you where I do most of my work! And there’s a beautiful view of the gardens from my room that I think you’d appreciate!”

Rarity’s cheeks turned red. What had I said?

“Did I...say something wrong?”

“No! At least...I know what you meant, but it came off entirely different.”

“What part?”

“The view from your room.”

“....I don’t get it.”

“Well..usually when a stallion invites a mare to his room...”

My eyes nearly popped out of my head.

“Oh! Oh my! I wasn’t- I mean I’d never- Not that I’d never! I just meant-“

I let my head fall to the table and groaned.

“Celestia kill me now.”

Rarity began to laugh. I peeked up at her. She wiped away a tear as she reached for my hoof.

“We’ve really got to work on your conversation skills.”

I began to chuckle. It quickly turned into a laugh, leaving both of us on the verge of tears.

The waiter returned and I asked for the check. I was shocked when he said that it was on the house. I could have left it at that, but I really didn’t want to abuse my power at all. I told the waiter to bring the check and paid for the meal. Rarity watched in shock as I passed over a small bag of bits.

We left the restaurant, seen off by the owner himself, and walked towards the castle. Rarity had her body pressed against mine, sending a tingling sensation through my entire being. I took her around to the gardens, not wanting to use the main entrance. The last thing I needed was to accidentally run into anypony. Specifically two alicorns.

We walked through the gardens for a while, enjoying the silence. As we went to head back to the castle, I discovered we were near a familiar area. A smile grew on my face.

“Follow me.”

I ran a hoof along the hedge wall until I found the concealment spell. My hoof disappeared through the false hedge and I led Rarity to the other side. Rarity looked around at the clearing we’d entered.

“What is this place?”

“Celestia had it set up for privacy. You know, whenever she needs to get away from the castle and staff. Or if a conversation needs to be kept secret.”

“It’s absolutely lovely!”

We sat under the gazebo, getting comfortable on the pillows. I looked over at the beautiful mare next to me.

“I never would have guessed that this is where I’d wind up in life.”

“And where’s that?”

“Living free of Chrysalis and the hive. And sitting here with the most beautiful creature in Equestria.”

She leaned over and kissed me. As she began to break away, I leaned forward and continued the kiss. I felt her jump a little, surprised at the move. Frankly I was surprised too, but I decided to go with it.

As we sank into the kiss more, I began to lose my balance. As my body tipped forward, I broke the kiss with enough time to cry out.

“Horsefeathers!”

I fell forward and knocked Rarity back. She cried out in shock as we toppled down. Of course we were already sitting so it wasn’t a far fall. Rarity landed on her back and I-

“Sorry!”

I was blushing harder than I ever had before. I had landed on top of Rarity. She began to giggle at my embarrassment.

“If I didn’t know how clumsy you were, I’d have said you did that on purpose.”

My face wasn’t cooling off at all. Why weren’t my legs working?! I needed to get up!

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-“

“It’s alright Shade. Honestly, I don’t mind the view.”

That caught my attention.

“View?”

Her smile softened. It was enough to make all my insides melt like butter.

“I’ve got you, a handsome stallion, and the starry sky above. What more could a girl ask for?”

I swallowed, feeling my body stiffen.

“I...I uh...I’ve never....”

She put her hoof against my lips

“It’s okay Shade... Neither have I.”

I was shocked.

“Really?”

“Well I am a lady after all. I don’t just go around with every boy that I see. I’ve been waiting.”

“For what?”

She pulled me down, our chests pressing together.

“For you dummy.”

She kissed me again. This felt different than before. This wasn’t just electrifying, it was...explosive! I began to press my lips against her and felt my hooves beginning to wander. Rarity giggled and pushed me away.

“This might work better without the clothes.”

———————————

I laid there, looking up at the stars. Luna had outdone herself tonight. I looked over at Rarity. She had fallen asleep. I suppose this would make for good bed tonight.

I found myself unable to fall asleep. So much had happened today. All I could do was look at the night sky. I began to smile as I realized the truth.

I loved her. She had every part of me. I was all hers for the rest of my life.

As I came to that realization, I felt a migraine take hold. I winced at the pain, feeling like my head was on fire. What was more strange was that my skin felt like it was bubbling. I tried to concentrate, willing any spell to come to mind.

A burst of light shot from my head and flew into the sky. With it, the migraine and the crawling skin dissipated. After a few seconds, the light erupted. Causing a shower of magic to rain down on the gardens.

“Celebrating, are we?”

I turned to find Rarity awake. I shook my head.

“No. Just dealing with some buildup. Everything’s fine.”

She snuggled closer to me and I laid back. That discharge had taken it out of me. I finally felt my eyes grow heavy as I pressed myself against Rarity. I kissed her head and whispered.

“I love you.”

I saw a small smile form on her face.

“About time you big dummy. I love you too.”

I couldn’t stop smiling as sleep overtook me. I prayed that I would dream of this day, wanting to relive it for the rest of my life.

Surprises All Around

Time went by as I continued my duties. Rarity stayed busy with her shops. I was surprised to learn that she and the girls had another run-in with that Starlight Glimmer. Or I guess to be more accurate it was mainly Twilight and Spike. Something about time travel and the end of Equestria. Either way I was glad that Rarity was safe.

We had taken to getting together whenever she came to Canterlot. Sometimes we only had time for a quick lunch, other times she’d stay the night. Either way I found myself walking around the castle with a stupid grin most of the time.

And it was unfortunately after one of our..sleepovers..that I had a grin so wide that I couldn’t hide it in time from Celestia and Luna. Celestia was the first to notice.

“Well! Somepony is in an excellent mood!”

My smile dropped and I groaned inwardly. In that moment, Luna chimed in.

“I think I know who he’s grinning about!”

“Well that’s pretty obvious Luna. But what happened between them that left him in such a state?”

Please stop.

“With that grin? Oh that’s easy!”

Stop!

“You wouldn’t be suggesting-?”

“Of course I am!”

“STOP!!!”

That made them flinch. The two alicorns turned back to me, wondering what I would do next. I took a long breath before beginning. I spoke through gritted teeth.

“My personal life is not up for discussion in these halls.”

I could see Celestia getting ready to say something. I held up my hoof, silencing her.

“My study. Now!”

The sisters tripped over each other as they tried to make for the door to my study. I’d finally garnered too many books for my bedroom and had taken an extra room for my personal study. The Princesses walked inside and sat down as I closed the door. I glared at both of them.

“Honestly! I put up with a lot from the two of you. I don’t even mind you poking fun at the fact that I have a marefriend now. But that subject is completely off limits anywhere outside these walls. I will not have my...my...”

“Sex life?”

My burning gaze fell on Luna and she looked down. I sighed.

“Yes. I won’t have it become the newest gossip. I work hard to have some anonymity around here. If word gets out that Rarity has a connection with me, it’ll be a nightmare for both of us.”

Celestia raised a hoof and I nodded to her. She cleared her throat.

“I’m sorry we’ve made you uncomfortable. We only meant it in good fun. We shouldn’t have been joking so candidly about...that. Especially about one of our closest friends.”

I nodded to her.

“Thank you Celestia.”

I turned to Luna.

“Care to add anything?”

“I'm sorry. You're just the only one of us we can poke fun at about...that.”

My brow arched.

“Wait... have you two never-“

Celestia piped up.

“Hang on! I never said I hadn’t!”

Luna scoffed.

“Oh really? What’s his name?”

“You wouldn’t know him. He lives in another dimension.”

“Surely you don’t mean Discord!”

“Of course not! How could you even suggest that?!”

"Well I certainly have more experience than you do."

"As if!"

I stamped my hoof against the ground.

“Enough!”

They both stopped and looked at me again. Another sigh left me.

“Can we just go about our day? I want to forget this ever happened. Please?”

They stared at me for a few seconds before nodding. I smiled and nodded back.

“Excellent.”

‘POOF!’

“Did someone say my name? My ears are literally burning!”

—————————

After that whole debacle, we were able to get on with the day. I was heading to my first meeting. There was one problem though.

“Honestly, why would you want to be a pony? They’re so dull!”

I did my best not to glare at the being floating over my head.

“Don’t you have anything better to do?”

“Of course I do! I should really be mowing my carpets and vacuuming the lawn today.”

“Then why don’t you leave me alone?”

“Because that’s exactly what you want! I wouldn’t be a good Spirit of Chaos if I did what others wanted.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be reformed now?”

“Oh I am!”

A halo popped into existence over Discord’s head.

“I am one hundred percent reformed! My days of being dastardly are behind me.”

I rolled my eyes as I continued down the hall.

“Good to know.”

I heard a ‘POP’ and felt a small weight on my back. I turned my head to find he’d shrunk down to the size of a squirrel and was lounging on me.

“What do you want Discord?”

“I’m glad you asked! I want to know about you. How does a changeling go from being a grunt to one of the most powerful creatures in Equestria? Politically powerful that is.”

“Dumb luck I suppose.”

“Oh? I doubt that’s the only factor here.”

“Why the interest?”

“I’ve heard about you from Fluttershy. When you first appeared, you were a weak shell of your former self.”

“Your point?”

“Well you’ve come a long way. Doesn’t that make you wonder?”

“Not really.”

“Oh you’re no fun!”

The weight disappeared off my back and Discord rematerialized in front of me, full size this time.

“You’re a master spy that’s infiltrated the highest level of Equestrian government and you think it’s all dumb luck?!”

He slapped his own face and groaned. I looked around the hall frantically, making sure nopony was nearby.

“Thank you for announcing that to all of Equestria. As if I don’t have enough to worry about!”

I stepped around the draconequs and kept walking.

“I’ve put that part of my life behind me Discord. I’m not what I used to be. And I’ll thank you to not to broadcast my old life to the world.”

“Or what?”

I stopped and felt my teeth grind together. Another headache was coming in too.

“Just...leave me alone.”

“But you were just about to threaten me! ME!! As if you could do anything to the Lord of Chaos! Ha!”

My headache spiked suddenly and I turned back to Discord.

“Leave. Me. ALONE!!”

The bolt that shot out of my horn was blinding. It had come without warning. As it left me, I felt the headache dissipate.

The light faded and there was a black mark on the floor where Discord had been. I glanced around, wondering if I’d actually hit him.

“My, my. That temper of yours doesn’t pair well with your condition.”

Discord appeared from the floor, wearing a devious smile.

“You might have hurt someone with that kind of power. Wouldn’t that be a shame?”

I took a deep breath.

“Nothing I can’t handle myself. It’s your own fault anyways.”

Discord chuckled.

“I know! I could feel the magic welling up in you. I wanted to see what you were capable of. Color me impressed Shade. You might have some talent after all.”

I frowned up at the jumble of animal parts.

“Next time just ask.”

“You do realize that your biology is the reason you can’t properly cast those spells, don’t you?”

“I’ll adapt.”

“Adaptation can only go so far changeling. Your body will always be wired for its original magic.”

“You think I don’t know that! I’m trying like Tartarus to keep my head from exploding!”

I sat down in the middle of the hall.

“You don’t need to tell me it’s a lost cause. I already know.”

Discord’s smile faded.

“Yet you’re still trying. And for what? Love? Friendship?”

I looked up at him.

“Yes. It’s the only thing that’s driving me anymore. The changeling is gone Discord. He died in that damned forest. I have to be more than that now. Or as close to it as I can be.”

Discord stared at me for a few moments before groaning.

“Ugh! Why did you have to ruin my fun with this serious, sappy stuff?”

He snapped his claws and I felt a sharp pain run through my body. I collapsed to the floor and groaned in pain. It continued for a solid minute before I could muster the strength to speak.

“What did you do?”

“Consider this a lesson in getting what you want. I have no doubt that you’ll come crawling back to me, begging to change you back by the end of the week.”

“Change me back?”

He leaned down and growled.

“You’re one of the dull ones now. I can’t wait to see you suffer like the rest of them.”

I couldn’t help but feel scared.

“What did you do?”

“You’re a pony now. That’s what you get for trying to blast me into oblivion.”

With another snap he was gone. I was left gasping for air as my body began to work properly again. Had that really just happened?

————————-

“Well? What do you think?”

I hadn’t wasted time in calling for Celestia and Luna. This required their input. They had more experience with Discord and I wasn’t sure what to expect.

Celestia began.

“Honestly? I’m not sure.”

Luna nodded in agreement.

“He makes it sound like a punishment, but...it’s precisely what you’ve been striving for. It’s confusing to say the least.”

“You did try to injure him. And Discord doesn’t take lightly to threats. Or at least he didn’t before. Honestly he’s become more of a nuisance since he reformed. Always playing tricks on everypony.”

I sighed.

“Is that all this is? Am I going to wake up tomorrow as a changeling again?”

Luna chimed in.

“Not necessarily. He said you’d come back begging to him. I think he means to leave you like this.”

Celestia’s brow furrowed.

“That’s true. Perhaps he wants to see if you can truly adapt. I can only imagine the strain your body is going through. How do you feel?”

I sat back against my chair.

“A little woozy. But my insides feel like they’re racing a bit.”

“Racing?”

I nodded as Luna stepped forward. Her horn glowed and she closed her eyes.

“Nothing seems to be wrong. A perfectly normal pony body. As for the feeling of racing-“

My eyes widened as it hit me.

“Of course! How could I be so stupid!”

The sisters looked at me in confusion. I took a deep breath as I let the realization wash over me. This is what Discord had meant by suffering. Somehow he knew I hadn’t taken into account the biggest difference between ponies and changelings.

“I’m a pony now. That means I’m going to age like a pony. My body feels like it’s moving too fast because from my perspective it is.”

Celestia stepped forward.

"Are you okay with that?"

I began to laugh. Celestia and Luna looked at me with concern. I took a deep breath and sighed.

“I’m going to grow old and die. What a novel concept.”

Luna stepped forward again.

“Are you going to be okay Shade?”

I smiled at my mentor.

“Yes. I think I am."

—————————

The day went by without any more surprises. I dealt with the smaller meetings while Celestia handled some of the more delicate matters. I let out a sigh of relief as I made my way to the dining room.

Celestia and Luna were already eating when I walked in. They both smiled at me as I sat down. I summoned a few platters towards me and dished up a plate of food. The magic was coming far easier than before. The platters had almost crashed into me.

The alicorns watched as I performed a few spells to prep my food, never saying a word. I dug into my food and felt my body relax as it received nourishment.

“It seems you’re adapting to your body well.”

I looked at Celestia and nodded.

“Things are starting to calm down. I don’t feel woozy anymore at least. And the magic is coming very easily.”

Luna leaned forward.

“Are you sure you still need me to teach you?”

I turned to her.

“Of course! I’m sure there’s loads you can teach me still!”

Luna smiled appreciatively before returning to her meal. Celestia cleared her throat and I turned back to her.

“I have something to tell both of you. I received a letter from Cadance today.”

My ears perked up. I hadn’t heard anything about her since Twilight told me of the pregnancy.

Luna swallowed her food.

“And how long were you going to keep it from us?”

“I only got it a few hours ago Luna. I wanted you both to be here for it.”

Her horn lit up and a dome of magic enveloped the table. This must be serious if she didn’t want anypony overhearing us.

Luna and I both scooted forward in our seats as Celestia began.

“Cadance had her baby.”

I smiled.

“Well isn’t that good news?”

Luna was smiling too.

“Is it a filly or a colt?”

“A nice, healthy filly.”

My smile began to disappear.

“Then what’s wrong?”

“Nothing bad. Just...shocking.”

Luna was nearly on her hooves at this point.

“Tell us already sister!”

Celestia took a breath.

“The baby is an alicorn.”

The room fell into complete silence. Nopony spoke for several minutes as we all tried to grasp what this meant. I was the first to speak up.

“How? How is that possible? You told me there’d never been an alicorn born before.”

Celestia nodded.

“I can’t explain how this could happen. Though I have my theory.”

Luna interrupted.

“I’m guessing it’s the same as mine.”

The blue alicorn turned to me.

“It’s very likely that Cadance passed the alicorn genes on to her baby.”

I nodded in understanding.

“That makes sense I suppose. But it’s still shocking that this could happen. I thought the ascension was more...superficial. I didn’t know it affected ponies down to the molecular level.”

Celestia stood up.

“Cadance has requested Luna and I to join her and Shining Armor in the Crystal Empire. That means we’ll be leaving you in charge while we’re away Shade.”

I nearly fell out of my chair.

“You want me to run Equestria?!”

She nodded.

“We shouldn’t be gone for more than a few days. I’m confident that you can handle the day to day routine. You know my schedule better than anypony.”

Luna chimed in.

“And I’ll still be checking dreams while I sleep.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat and stood.

“I’ll do my best. But...please hurry back?”

That got them both to giggle.

Running the Show

I woke up the following morning to a knock on my door. My voice was muffled beneath a pillow.

“What do you want?”

I heard the door open and cracked an eye to see who was disturbing me.

“Sorry to wake you sir, but there is a lot to get done today.”

It was one of Celestia’s aides. She had a large scroll floating next to her. I groaned as I sat up.

“That better not be the agenda for today.”

She smiled.

“Oh no sir! This is the reading material for the first meeting.”

“Please tell me you’re joking.”

“No sir. If we wrote out the daily schedule, we’d use up half the scrolls in Canterlot within a week!”

My blank stare made her chuckle nervously.

“Sorry. That was a joke. I guess it wasn’t as funny as I thought.”

I stood up and walked towards the door.

“I’ll read that behemoth over breakfast. How soon is the meeting?”

“An hour sir.”

“Well I can get through that in an hour. How does Celestia manage it?”

“She usually skims it for the important bits.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Of course she does. Honestly, how she’s made it this long without me is amazing.”

We left the room and made our way towards the kitchen. I shook my head in disbelief.

“Skimming. Honestly!”

“Well it’s served her well up to this point sir.”

I stopped, causing the aide to nearly run into me.

“That’s something we’re going to take care of right now. No more ‘sir’ this and ‘sir’ that. You can call me Shade when it’s just the staff around. If we have visitors, then you can call me sir.”

She straightened up.

“Yes sir. I mean- Yes Shade!”

“And what do I call you?”

“Oh! How could I forget to introduce myself? I’m Rain Cloud.”

“Pleasure to meet you Rain Cloud. Now how about some breakfast before we start the day?”

She nodded and followed me to the kitchen. There was already a plate ready at the small table inside. I looked up to see Butter Whisk nod in my direction.

“Figured I’d have it ready for ya. You got a big day from what I’ve heard.”

“Thanks Butter Whisk!”

I sat down to breakfast and summoned Rain Cloud’s scroll forward. It levitated in front of me, turning constantly as I read through it. Thankfully Discord’s “punishment” hadn’t stunted any of my old gifts. I could still shapeshift, mimic, and speed read. Thank Celestia for that!

I could feel Rain Cloud watching me. A small smile crept onto my face. I glanced over at her and she immediately looked away.

“Never seen anything like it, have you?”

She turned back to me.

“Like what?”

“My reading.”

“No. I haven’t. I didn’t even know that it was possible to read that fast.”

The scroll came to an end and I let it float down to the table. Rain Cloud spoke again, though a little more guarded this time.
“How...how do you do that without...well, a horn?”

I parted my mane to reveal my horn.

“It’s on the small end, but it works well enough for me.”

“Oh! I’ve never seen one like that... You’re not like any pony I’ve ever met before.”

I chuckled.

“Good. I wouldn’t want to lose my edge. I’ve done a good deal to keep an air of mystery around me.”

“May I ask why?”

I stared at Rain Cloud for a moment. This was the longest I’d talked with one of the staff members in some time. Usually I made concise remarks and didn’t linger. Now I was going to have her around me all day. I suppose I should take advantage of the opportunity and see exactly what had become of the rumor mill.

“What have you heard about me?”

Rain Cloud began to look nervous.

“Maybe we should get going. We wouldn’t want to be late for the meeting.”

Celestia had definitely worn off on me. I was getting a little giddy making Rain Cloud squirm. She obviously had some juicy pieces of gossip.

“We have a little time still. Please. I’m honestly interested to know what others are saying. I’m not unaware of the whispers behind my back. It would be nice to hear them in front for a change.”

Rain Cloud looked around the kitchen. Butter Whisk and his staff weren’t even paying attention, though I suspected one or two ponies might have their ears pointed towards us out of curiosity. I nodded to Rain Cloud, and she took a breath.

“Well...there’s the oldie but goodie about you being a shadow brought to life.”

I picked up my coffee, smiling before I took a sip.

“I love that one. Very mysterious.”

“Or that where you’re the offspring of Nightmare Moon-“

Rain Cloud was quick to erect a shield in front of her as my coffee shot out of my mouth.

“What?!I thought the shadow brought to life was part of that! Now I’m supposed to be her child as well?!”

Rain Cloud began to giggle as she lowered her shield.

“Well I think I can safely file that both of those away as false after that reaction!”

I shook my head.

“Honestly. The things ponies come up with.”

“So...what is the truth then?”

Several seconds of silence passed before I stood up, turning to the kitchen.

“Thanks again Butter!”

Rain Cloud had to scramble to keep up as I made a swift exit.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to overstep!”

I spoke over my shoulder as I walked.

“Don’t dwell on it. Let’s get to business. I’m meeting with a delegation from the South?”

“From the Appleloosan area, yes. It’s the Buffalo Chief and his strongest warriors.”

“Warriors? Is this a meeting or an attack?”

“It’s their custom. They like to show their strength.”

“Anything I should be aware of besides the reading?”

“No, no! I’m sure you’re fine. And I’m sure the Princess filled you in on the greeting.”

I skidded to a halt.

“Greeting?”

Rain Cloud froze.

“Oh no. Please tell me she told you.”

“Does it sound like she told me Rain Cloud?!”

“Okay, okay. That’s alright. We can figure this out.”

Her horn lit up and several books popped into existence. She began flipping pages frantically.

“I know it’s in one of these.”

I turned around, spotting a nearby guard.

“What time is it?”

“A quarter to nine, sir.”

I flipped back to Rain Cloud.

“Fifteen minutes!”

“I know! Don’t rush me!”

I sat in silence as the air filled with the sound of pages turning rapidly. This was going to be a close one...

—————————

I entered the throne room with Rain Cloud right on my tail. A sigh of relief left me.

“They’re not here yet. Thank Celestia.”

I sat a few steps below the thrones. Rain Cloud gave me a funny look.

“I know you’re new to this, but you’re the leader of Equestria right now. When the Buffalo come in, they’ll be expecting to see somepony on that throne. They might take it as disrespectful otherwise.”

I looked up at Celestia’s throne. It felt wrong to sit there. I didn’t belong on a throne. But...Rain Cloud was right. How would it look if my first time in charge led to a dispute with the Buffalo of the South?

I stepped up to the throne and sat down.

“Huh. Pretty cozy actually. She likes a soft cushion, doesn’t she?”

Rain Cloud nodded.

“She hates being uncomfortable. Especially during these types of meetings. Or when it’s an open forum. You know the weird part though?”

“What?”

“She only had the cushion done six years ago.”

“You’re kidding!”

Rain Cloud shook her head, and I began to laugh.

“You’re telling me that Celestia just put up with an uncomfortable seat for nearly a thousand years?!”

Rain Cloud nodded, her own smile appearing.

“She hates to bother ponies with those sorts of things. She thought she’d sound...prissy.”

That got my laughing even more.

“Stop! I can’t meet the Buffalo like this!”

I reigned in the laughter as fast as I could. It was a close call too! No sooner had I gotten my hysterics under control, that the main door to the throne room opened. A pair of guards led in a group of five Buffalo. I stood up from the throne and smiled.

“Welcome! I’m pleased you made it here. I apologize for the absence of Princess Celestia, but she was called away for...an emergency.”

The Buffalo at the front of the group stopped just short of the stairs. I descended to the bottom, stopping directly in front of the Chief. I had to stop myself from cowering a little. I hadn’t realized just how large the Buffalo were!

I stood my ground and straightened my posture.

“I am the Right Hoof of the Royal Family. Princess Celestia has left me to serve in her place while she is away.”

The Buffalo snorted and spoke.

“I am Chief Thunderhooves. It is an honor to be invited here. Allow me to give you our ceremonial greeting.”

I nodded.

“Of course! I hope I don’t get it wrong.”

“We’ll forgive any error. Though I wonder if you’ll be able to...handle the end?”

I chuckled nervously.

“Oh that? I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

Thunderhooves smiled and began the greeting. I followed along as we stamped our hooves and danced in a circle. The ending was coming, and I had to admit that I was terrified of what would happen. The Chief got into the final stance. I mirrored the movement and prepared myself.

Without thinking, we both threw our heads forward.

I could have sworn I heard a crack, but it wasn’t bone breaking. That I knew of anyways... I stood back and shook my head.

“Wow. You guys sure know how to say ‘hello’, don’t you?”

Thunderhooves laughed.

“I’m just impressed that you’re still conscious!”

He looked back at the other Buffalo.

“This Right Hoof is tough! An honorable pony for sure!”

The Buffalo stamped their hooves. I looked back at Rain Cloud. She was smiling and nodding encouragingly. And so was her twin! ....Wait.

——————————-

The meeting with the Buffalo went well, even though I had a massive headache throughout the event. I attended three meetings with various councils afterwards. They were only bearable thanks to Rain Cloud bringing me some medicine.

When the day finally ended, I collapsed into a chair in the kitchen. My physical state made Butter Whisk laugh.

“Rough day there?”

I cracked open an eye and did my best to smile.

“I could have done without the head-butting Buffalo. But what can you do?”

He laughed again and brought over a plate of food.

“Well I hope he didn’t knock the appetite out of ya.”

He set the plate down on the table and my stomach growled. I got my second wind and began eating.

Rain Cloud entered the kitchen and sat across from me.

“We’re almost done for the day.”

I froze.

“Almost?”

“You need to read a couple scrolls for tomorrow. And I have a letter for you.”

“I’m sure Celestia can wait to read her own mail.”

“It’s not for Celestia. It’s for you.”

My ears pricked up as she raised a scroll up. I grabbed it with my magic and let it fall open in front of me. My eyes darted back and forth for a moment. I thought of my words carefully before I spoke.

“Huh... Twilight and her friends were summoned to the Crystal Empire. Princess Cadance has had her baby!”

Everypony in the kitchen cheered at the news. I smiled with them, even though sadness was ebbing in on me. That meant I wouldn’t be seeing Rarity anytime soon.

I hadn’t said it, but the letter was actually from Rarity. She was letting me know about the trip with the others. Celestia had summoned them apparently. Was there trouble? Was the baby proving too much for them? I had a hard time believing that three full-grown alicorns, soon to be four, would have trouble with one infant. Then again I didn’t know what kind of power she might be exhibiting.

As the kitchen quieted down, Rain Cloud passed a couple scrolls to me. It seemed I had a little homework for my meetings tomorrow. I thanked Butter Whisk for dinner and left the kitchen. Rain Cloud was right behind me.

“Do you mind if I ask you a question?”

“Yes. I’ll make sure to read these tonight.”

“That wasn’t- Are you-?”

She looked around the hall. I glanced around as well. Nopony was in sight. Rain Cloud leaned closer and whispered.

“Are you really a changeling?”

I hid my shock well. I’d learned that from Luna. There were times you couldn’t let others know what you were thinking. Right now, I didn’t want Rain Cloud to know how much I was freaking out.

“Is this another rumor you heard? I figured we’d moved past that conversation.”

“Well...I might have overheard something the other day from...”

“From?”

“Umm...you and Discord.”

I closed my eyes and held in a scream.

“I’m going to kill him.”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to upset you!”

I opened my eyes and sighed.

“It’s alright. What did you hear exactly?”

“That you’re a changeling spy that’s gotten in with Celestia.”

Ouch. Not good.

“Does anyone else know about this?”

Her eyes grew to the size of saucers.

“Oh no! I would never! I know we were having a little fun earlier today, but I’m really not a gossip. I’m one of Celestia’s aides. Do you know how many personal things I’ve heard or embarrassing moments I’ve witnessed? Too many to count. And I’ve never blabbed about one of them.”

“But I’m not Celestia or Luna. I’m basically a stranger to you.”

“But you’re the Right Hoof! You’re just as important as they are!”

“I don’t think I’d go that far.”

“Either way, I’d never reveal something about you unless you told me it was okay.”

Her eyes conveyed her sincerity. She wasn’t lying. I slowly nodded.

“That’s good to hear. I guess I should tell you my side of things so that Discord’s words aren’t the only ones in the mix.”

We continued down the hall to my study. I set my scrolls on the desk and locked eyes with Rain Cloud.

“I’m only telling you this as you’ve already heard more than you should have. That’s not your fault of course. You weren’t trying to eavesdrop.”

“I would never.”

“Then I’ll clear the air. I don’t need anyone thinking I’m going to betray two of my dearest friends.”

Rain Cloud nodded and I took a deep breath.

“I was changeling. And a spy. But I got separated from the horde after the Canterlot Invasion. By the time I was found, I was nearly dead. I was taken in by Twilight Sparkle and nursed back to health. I was introduced to Celestia, and she was interested in my reading ability.”

“You mean like how you read that scroll this morning?”

“Precisely. When I amassed enough knowledge, I began helping her. She gave me more responsibilities along the way, leading up to running the country for a few days while she and Luna are away.”

“Wow. That’s a lot to take in.”

“I know. But it’s the truth. I’m not a spy anymore and I’m not even a changeling either.”

She cocked her head to one side.

“Come again?”

I closed my eyes and sighed. I really hadn’t meant to divulge that, but there was no going back now.

“It’s a Discord thing. Let’s leave it at that.”

“It doesn’t sound so bad honestly. Why don’t you want ponies to know the truth?”

“It’s a matter of what the truth might do.”

“You think somepony will use it to push you out.”

I couldn’t hide my surprise. Rain Cloud smiled.

“Trust me. You pick up on a few things when you’ve been around politics long enough.”

“I suppose you’re right. I don’t want to put Celestia and Luna through the trouble.”

“You’re more worried about them?”

“Like I said, they’re my friends.”

Rain Cloud nodded and stood up.

“I’ve honestly wondered about you for a while. But you seem to be a good, honest pony.”

“Well at least that much.”

“Thanks for sharing with me Shade. But a word of advice?”

“What’s that?”

“Next time you’re talking to Discord, do it behind closed doors.”

A chuckle escaped me as she left the room. I sat back in my chair and shook my head to clear it. The day hadn’t been all bad. Some headaches both literal and figurative, but overall not bad. The conversation with Rain Cloud had proven I needed to start forming ties with the staff so that they trusted me. I slowly stood up from my chair, my head beginning to pound again. I was ready for a good night’s sleep. And next time, I’d just shake hooves with the Buffalo.

Breaking Down

I found my dreams filled with a horde of Discords. They were flying around in circles, laughing at me. I couldn’t help but be annoyed at the endless laughing.

The only thing worse was that they kept inserting phrases of conversation from our encounter the other day.

“You’re one of the dull ones now.”

“You’re still trying?”

“Why did you have to ruin my fun?”

“I can’t wait to see you suffer.”

I was grinding my teeth after a few minutes of this and began firing energy bolts at the horde. They simply vanished one by one, laughing all the louder at my attacks.

“Why so edgy? Did I have an effect on you?”

I turned to find one remaining Discord. He was sitting in a chair, reading a newspaper.

“What are you doing here Discord?”

“Am I really here? This is a dream after all.”

“Don’t play dumb with me.”

“Honestly! I don’t think I’m the real Discord. I think I’m just a dream version.”

“You really expect me to believe that?”

“It doesn’t matter to me. It’s your dream.”

He set the newspaper down and smirked at me.

“So why do you think I’m here?”

“That’s what I just asked you.”

“Let’s assume I’m not real then. Answer the question.”

My brow furrowed as the frustration built up. As it did, more Discords popped into existence. They all began laughing and chanting.

“You’re a pony now. You’re a pony now. You’re a pony now.”

I covered my ears.

“Shut up already!”

The main Discord stepped forward.

“My, my. Having a little trouble with reality?”

I glared at him.

“What are you talking about?”

The crowd inched closer.

“I can’t wait to see you suffer.”

For the first time I felt something other than annoyance or frustration. A chill ran down my spine as their words landed. The main Discord nodded.

“There you go.”

Before I could say anything, a loud, thunder-like noise echoed through my dreamscape. The Discords faded as my world grew dark.

——————————

I woke up, discovering the noise to be a knock at my door. It took me a moment to form coherent words.

“Come in.”

The door opened. I expected to see Rain Cloud but was surprised by a thin stallion instead.

“Good morning sir. Are you ready to begin your day?”

I rolled over in my bed.

“Does it look like I’m ready? Who are you anyway?”

“I’m Gold Feather. I’m your aide for the day.”

“Do you guys normally switch off like this?”

“I presume you mean Rain Cloud? Yes. We switch every other day. That way we don’t get overworked.”

“Lucky for you two. I’ve got to work all day, overworked or not.”

I sat up and stretched.

“What’s on the agenda?”

“A few committee meetings, a ribbon cutting for a new fountain, and your imminent death.”

I froze, staring at the side.

“What did you say?”

“A few committee-“

“The last thing you said.”

“The luncheon with Manehattan’s mayor?”

That’s not what he’d said....was it?

I stood up and walked towards the door.

“I need some breakfast before all of this. How long do I have?”

“Forty minutes.”

“Long enough.”

I walked through the halls, shaking off my dream. I must have misheard Gold Feather. I was still groggy after all.

——————————

The meetings went by without any trouble. Committees had become my bread and butter. Gold Feather was leading the way towards the fountain I was opening.

“Celestia has a speech written already. Though some of the wording will need to be switched around for you.”

“I read it already. I think I can switch out the words myself.”

I could tell that surprised him, but he didn’t break his gaze from the path ahead.

“Oh...alright. Well we should be there in just a minute.”

I did my best not to chuckle. He’d been like this most of the day.

“You seem a bit tense Gold Feather.”

“What makes you say that?”

“You’ve done a pretty good job of avoiding eye-contact today.”

“I’m not-“

He cut himself off before he could argue. I finally saw his eyes turn toward me.

“You’ll have to forgive me. I’ve only ever heard of you until today. Celestia usually doesn’t require Rain Cloud or myself past breakfast. Usually just a briefing in the morning, you know?”

“Haven’t helped out in a while I take it?”

“Our days are usually filled with going over the schedules for the whole month! So when she told us we’d be helping her Right Hoof....we were surprised. We know little about you. And from what I can tell by looking at you, you’re not exactly...normal.”

I grinned.

“Thank you. I appreciate the compliment. And your honesty too. I could tell Rain Cloud was a little wary around me, but she also seemed...curious.”

Gold Feather smiled.

“She’s been curious about things ever since she started working here. Curiosity is a young pony’s default.”

“She doesn’t seem that young.”

“She’s younger than me at least. I’m dreading my next birthday.”

“You don’t look much older than me!”

“I’m closer to forty than I’d care to admit. I’ve just gotten lucky with my looks. Hopefully they hold out. You look closer to Rain Cloud’s age. Mid-twenties?”

I couldn’t help chuckling.

“Around there.”

We turned a corner, and the fountain came into view. There was a small crowd already. I wondered if more would come. Gold Feather stopped, signaling for me to as well.

“Are you ready for death?”

I froze.

“What?”

He looked at me, obviously puzzled.

“I asked you if you’re ready for the speech...”

I stared at him for several seconds before answering.

“...Yes. I’ll be...fine.”

Gold Feather looked at me for a few seconds. I did my best to put out an air of confidence, but something told me I wasn’t selling it. Gold Feather looked over towards the fountain.

“You know I really should make sure they’re ready to turn the fountain on at the right moment. I might need a few minutes.”

He looked at me again, a knowing look in his eye.

“Will you be ok waiting?”

I nodded.

“Yeah. I’ll just...collect my thoughts.”

Gold Feather gave a curt nod and walked towards the fountain. I sat down for a moment and tried to remember my breathing exercises.

I can’t wait to watch you suffer.

Why was this coming up today? I had been dealing with my new body for a little now. Surely I wasn’t hung up on something like my mortality, was I? I was like everypony now.

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths, attempting to calm my mind. I had a speech to get through right now. Discord’s mind games had to be put on the backburner. Surely Celestia had done that a time or two. It must be possible.

“Are you good?”

I opened my eyes to find Gold Feather in front of me. I nodded.

“Yeah. I can do this.”

I trotted forward to a pedestal situated in front of the fountain. Ponies eyes were beginning to lock on to me. I cleared my throat and began.

“Good afternoon everypony! I apologize that Celestia couldn’t be here herself. She’s been called to the Crystal Empire for a family matter. But she’s left me the great honor of dedicating this fountain today. Not only does this bring new beauty to the area, but a wonderful-“

You’re one of the dull ones now.

“-reminder of the unity between all ponies. The statues commissioned for the center of this fountain depict a unicorn, an earth pony, and a pegasus holding hooves in friendship. A marvelous piece of art for-“

You’re going to die.

I felt another chill run along my spine.

“-all to...enjoy. So, without further delay, I dedicate this fountain.”

I motioned to the nearby maintenance pony, and he turned the valve connected to the fountain. It sprang to life with water raining down into the basin. Everypony began cheering and stomping their hooves.

I did my best to compose myself. I could feel the sweat beginning to roll down my head. Gold Feather quickly approached.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing!”

He flinched. I hadn’t meant to yell. I took a deep breath and tried again.

“Nothing. Can we just head back towards the castle?”

“Of course. We have to get ready for your lunch.”

“Damn. I forgot about that. Is there anything else on the agenda?”

“Actually no. It’s one of the first light days there’s been in a long time.”

“Good. I think I’m not feeling well. But I can make it through the lunch.”

“Are you sure? The mayor would understand.”

I shook my head.

“I’m fine.”

“You’re limping! Did you step on something?”

“No I’ve had that for a while.”

“Really? That looks painful.”

I looked back at my leg as we continued walking. I was hobbling along like my first day out of Everfree. Definitely acting worse than usual.

“Damn leg. Come on!”

I tried to walk more gracefully, but the effort caused my knee to buckle. Gold Feather jumped in front of me and kept me from hitting the ground.

“Sweet Celestia! You weigh a ton! I mean...are you okay?”

“Does it look like I am?”

I looked around and noticed a few sets of eyes following us. I stood up as quickly as I could and brushed myself off.

“Let’s just get back to the castle.”

————————————

Gold Feather had the lunch postponed as soon as we arrived. I tried to argue, but I was feeling more drained than ever. My leg was still causing me grief as we walked through the halls.

“Are you absolutely sure there’s nothing else I need to be doing today?”

“Positive. I’m going to get a doctor here to have a look at you.”

“I don’t need a doctor.”

“Your opinion doesn’t matter right now. You’re leading Equestria at the moment and we need to make sure you’re not about to die on us.”

“Do you guys get this stubborn with Celestia?”

“She’s over a thousand years old. She knows better.”

Gold Feather helped me to my room, and I collapsed on the bed. Without another word, he left. I groaned at the thought of having a doctor in here.

“The last thing I want is an exam.”

‘POOF’

“Now, now! I assure you I’m fully licensed!”

My eyelids flew up to reveal Discord in a doctor’s coat. He flashed a mischievous grin and held up a tongue depressor.

“Now open wide! Let’s see what the fuss is about.”

I sat up and glared at the draconequs.

“YOU!!”

He dropped the depressor in surprise.

“There’s no need to shout.”

“This is all your fault!”

With a snap, the coat disappeared, and a chair materialized. Discord sat down and summoned a cup of tea.

“What are you blabbering about?”

“All day I’ve been hearing your voice! What have you been up to?”

“Hearing my voice? That sounds lovely! What was I saying?”

“Don’t act like you don’t know! And let’s not forget you showing up in my dreams last night.”

Discord began laughing.

“Dreams? I don’t have any control over that realm. That’s Luna’s territory. I’m flattered you were dreaming of me though.”

That made me pause. Had it really just been a dream?

“But...if you weren’t...then...”

I fell back on the bed again.

“What did you do to me Discord?”

He paused mid-sip and set his cup down.

“Don’t you remember? I altered your anatomy? An extremely painful process? I really think you’d remember something like that.”

“Can you be serious for a few minutes?”

Discord lowered his head to my level and smiled.

“I told you it was a lesson. Sometimes getting what you want isn’t always the best.”

“The voices?”

“Your guess is as good as mine. Though I would guess it’s that brain of yours. It’s panicking over its new mortality.”

“I don’t care about being mortal.”

“Your mouth is saying that. Your head obviously disagrees.”

“So you’re saying that deep down-“

“You’re terrified of dying.”

I let it sink in. He was right. Everything that had happened since my dream had been this deep-seated fear.

“I’ve faced countless enemies. I lived in that damned forest. I’ve nearly died several times! Why should I fear death now?”

Discord finished his tea and snapped it away.

“Because it’s coming whether you want it to or not. You’re not quasi-immortal anymore. Two days ago you had centuries ahead of you. Now you’ll be lucky if you have eighty years at most. You never once considered the fact that being one of them would mean giving up your greatest advantage.”

He snapped his claws and a bottle appeared in front of him. It contained a clear liquid in it.

“Such a fragile thing.”

I didn’t like the look of that vial. Something felt ominous about it.

“What...is that?”

He dangled the bottle in front of me and smiled.

“This is your life-force. Or at least the extra from when I changed you.”

“The extra?”

“Bottled immortality to put it simply. We couldn’t have it go to waste now, could we?”

He tossed me the bottle and I clumsily caught it with my hooves. I stared at it, shocked at the sight of my own life in front of me.

“Why would you give it to me like this?”

“Call it a last temptation.”

“Temptation?”

“If you drink that, you’ll regain all those lost years. Centuries of time, all for you.”

I glared up at the draconequs.

“You’re horrible, you know that?”

“Thank you!”

Discord stood up and snapped his chair away.

“Well I think that covers my good deed for the month.”

“Altering my biology and driving me insane counts as a good deed?”

“Well I could just turn you into a cockroach if that will make you feel better.”

“Why are you doing this to me? What gives you the right to toy with my fate like this?”

He leaned in close once again and whispered.

“Call it a trial run. I’m interested to know what you’ll choose.”

He stood up straight and snapped his claws.

‘POOF’

I stood there for a moment, making sure I was alone. My gaze was locked on the bottle in front of me. I grabbed it with my magic and sent it over to a drawer. It tucked itself into a corner as the drawer shut.

“A last temptation...”

That had to be the most wicked act of them all. Dangling that sort of gift in front of me was cruel by so many standards. I sat on the bed and sighed, letting all the events of the day sink in.

‘Knock Knock’

“Come in.”

The door opened to reveal Celestia. I jumped from the bed and grinned.

“Welcome back! How was the Empire?”

“It was...interesting. But I thought there might be somepony else you’d want to see.”

She stepped aside to reveal my favorite alabaster unicorn. I felt my legs tremble a little at the sight of Rarity.

Rarity ran forward and pulled me into a hug.

“It’s so good to see you dear!”

I wrapped my hooves around her.

“I’m so glad you’re safe.”

Celestia smiled and began to retreat.

“We can talk later Shade. I’ll give you two sometime alone.”

She shut the door behind her, leaving just Rarity and me. I felt my grip tighten around Rarity as the tears began rolling down my cheeks. Rarity pulled away, looking concerned.

“What’s wrong?”

The tears continued.

“Nothing. I’ve just...had a bad day.”

“What happened?”

How was I supposed to explain it? What could I say? The longer I took to answer, the more worried she looked.

“Please tell me Shade. Whatever it is can’t be that bad. I mean...it’s not like you’ve got something terminal, right?”

Terminal...that wasn’t entirely wrong.

The tears increased and I began to full-on cry. I collapsed on the bed as Rarity pulled me into her hooves. She let me cry into her shoulder as she whispered words of comfort in my ear. Through the blubbering I slowly told her everything.

She never said a word. She took it all in without ever commenting on Discord, the dream, or the voices. She just held me and continued to let me know that everything would be okay.

Settling In

While Rarity had said she’d made up a place for me at the boutique, she’d failed to specify that it was her own bed.

“There’s a welcome surprise.”

I glanced at Rarity as she set my bag down in the corner.

“What you said at the station...does nopony know that you and I are...”

Rarity blushed.

“Well...no. In fact, none of the others even know we’re dating. Except for Twilight of course.”

“Oh? Am I a dirty little secret or something?”

“Of course not darling! It just hasn’t come up. Relationships aren’t exactly in our normal conversation.”

I sat on the bed.

“I thought that was something all mares talked about.”

“Normally I’d agree, but consider our little circle. We’re constantly dealing with threats. Or going on adventures. And we all have jobs. Not really any time for other things.”

I chuckled.

“Glad I could squeeze myself in.”

She smiled and sat next to me.

“I hope I’m able to help you while you’re here. I can’t even imagine what you must be dealing with right now.”

“Thanks Rare. I just need time to...decompress. It’s been a while since I could really relax.”

“Anything I can do to help?”

I leaned over and kissed her. She flinched in surprise, but soon melted into me. When I pulled away, I was smiling.

“That’s a good start.”

She smiled back and stood up.

“I have some work I need to finish up. Would you like to sit with me?”

“Sure. I’ll be down in a minute.”

Rarity walked out of the room as I went to my bag. I opened it up and grabbed one of my books. As it slid out of the bag, I heard the bottle tip over. I looked inside to make sure it hadn’t spilled. I wasn't sure what the contents were capable of if they soaked into anything.

A series of questions popped into my head thanks to my conversation with Discord. Would Rarity want a life like that? Outlive your friends and family? Stay the same for hundreds of years? I shook my head. This was the opposite of decompressing and it was never going to become an issue. I shut the bag and left the room.

—————————

After a few days, I got together with the rest of the girls. They were all excited to see me. We met at the castle for lunch and caught up. Pinkie was kind enough to bring me up to speed.

“-and so now that Starlight is Twilight’s student she’s learning about friendship and Twilight told her to make a new friend who turned out to be Trixie and we were all like- GASP! -but it turned out alright and then Rainbow Dash is also an official Wonderbolt now which is amazing but her first day was kind of rough but it got better and then we also helped Rarity open up her new shop in Manehattan which was waaaay crazy-“

I checked out at that point and leaned over to Rarity, whispering.

“Why didn’t you tell me you finally got the Manehattan shop? I would love to see it sometime.”

She smiled and nodded, motioning back to Pinkie. I refocused my attention on the hyper pony.

“-and Rainbow Dash got back from her Daring Do convention yesterday and that brings us to today!”

She took a huge breath and collapsed. The girls all giggled at their pink friend. Applejack sat forward, turning to me.

“So how long have you two been a thing?”

My eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. Rarity was frozen in place. And it seemed everypony except Twilight was shocked. I slowly turned to Applejack.

“How...”

Applejack motioned to my hoof. I looked down and realized I was holding Rarity’s hoof. It was lower than the table, out of view for the others, but Applejack was on Rarity’s other side. So she’d had a front row seat to our secret bit of affection. And she’d just called us out.

All of a sudden, Rarity began to giggle. We all stared at her. As she settled down, she lifted our joined hooves onto the table.

“I guess the cat’s out of the bag.”

Pinkie started cheering while the rest began to ask questions. Rarity took the lead and answered most of them. And then Rainbow had to ask-

“So...how serious are you guys?”

I was confused by the question, but Rarity seemed to understand. She scoffed at the pegasus.

“Rainbow Dash! That’s impolite. The stage of our relationship is nopony’s concern.”

Rainbow leaned over to Fluttershy and whispered something. Fluttershy immediately turned red. That made Rarity fume. I took over at that point.

“Is anypony interested in hearing about my work in Canterlot? I’d looove to bounce some of our new policies off of you girls.”

Rainbow Dash immediately took off.

“Sorry! Just remembered I have a flight practice!”

Applejack stood up and winked, catching the hint.

“Ah shucks. I have chores to do.”

She walked away after Rainbow.

Fluttershy stood up.

“I actually need to go check on some of the animals. Otherwise I would Shade. It sounds...interesting?”

I had to keep myself from laughing. Once Fluttershy disappeared, I couldn’t hold it anymore.

“Do I know how to clear a room?”

Rarity smiled at me.

“Remind me to thank you later for ending that conversation.”

Twilight stood up and stretched her legs.

“It’s great having you around again Shade. Maybe you can come over again soon. I could use your talent for a few things on my plate.”

I nodded to the Princess.

“Call me anytime.”

I stood up with Rarity and we turned to leave.

“Excuse me!”

All three of us turned around. Pinkie was still in her chair.

“These new policies don’t affect anything dessert-related, do they?”

———————————

I laid in bed next to Rarity. Moonlight came in through the window, bathing the room in its soft light. It was peaceful. I felt my eyes growing heavier as sleep overtook me finally.

And then I was in a familiar meadow.

I looked around at the night sky. There were twinkling stars covering at least a third of the sky. As I watched them though, some of them became solid light. The dazzling effect on the sky was becoming stationary. And that’s when I realized what was happening.

Luna was checking on dreams.

I sat and watched the sky as it became more still. As the last star stopped twinkling, a new light appeared. And it was coming closer. I stood up and watched as the light touched down in the meadow and revealed Luna. She spotted me right away.

“Shade! I’m glad you made it!”

“As if I had a choice in the matter.”

She chuckled.

“Fair point. I just wanted to check on you. It’s been a while since we had a conversation.”

She sat down next to me as I felt my smile fade.

“I think I'm coming to terms with my new existence, but it's still harder than I thought."

"I understand. It took me some time to truly come to terms with the possibility of death."

“How old were you when you figured it out?”

She looked up at the sky, eyes darting between stars.

“It was around the time I was banished.”

I was speechless. She’d never talked much about her time as Nightmare Moon. I stayed silent as she began.

“I felt like I was being stripped away from existence. The Elements may be used for good, but they don’t work gently. They changed me into pure energy before blasting me into the Moon. I can imagine it might be slightly similar to when Discord changed your biology so suddenly.”

I shuddered at the memory. I’d felt like I was going to die in seconds. To be turned into magic energy though? That was beyond me. Luna continued.

“Even though my thoughts were consumed with revenge, there were times where I thought I’d never come back. And part of me was convinced that I would die up there. It was one of the only times that Nightmare Moon was truly scared.”

She turned her gaze back to me.

“When I came back, I learned the value of living. I figured out that death will come no matter what. So you need to learn to live. And you must treasure it, no matter how many years you have left. Be it one or one thousand.”

I nodded slowly.

“I’m trying.”

“You’re going to have some bad days. You’ll probably even have bad months or years even. But know that you have ponies around you that love you. Me, Rarity, Twilight, Celestia, and so many more. You have value in this new life of yours. Don’t count yourself out.”

“Short version: hang in there?”

She looked annoyed.

“A bit oversimplified, but yes.”

I felt a smile return to my face.

“You and Celestia really love me?”

Luna smiled.

“Of course we do. You’re like the little brother we always wanted.”

I chuckled.

“That would explain so much of your behavior.”

The sky began to grow lighter in one corner. Luna stood up.

“Sunrise is coming soon. I’d better finish up.”

“Thank you Luna. For everything.”

The Princess smiled as she took off into the sky.

“Life is hard Shade. But do yourself a favor. Find the easy things first and work your way up. Maybe it won’t look so bad then.”

She disappeared in another ray of light and the meadow faded around me.

I opened my eyes and found the Sun starting to peek over the horizon. I turned over in bed, scooting closer to Rarity. She sighed in her sleep as my hoof curled around her body. I smiled and felt myself drifting off again. This time, no dreams.

I followed Luna’s advice and worked on little things in my life first. It made day to day life a little easier. I also tried to be social when I had the energy for it. Some days were even fun! I plan on revisiting the ‘Cookie Zombie’ prank in my dreams regularly.

One of my bigger, upcoming social strides was meeting somepony new; Starlight Glimmer.

The girls had told me plenty about her. She was a lot like me in some respects. She was reforming and studying with Twilight now. And it seemed she’d turned over a new leaf. Twilight had suggested I meet her once I was comfortable. I’d finally decided it was time and was heading for the castle.

I wasn’t sure what to expect when I arrived. This pony had enslaved her town and nearly destroyed the world over revenge. All I could think of was Chrysalis...

I knocked on the door of the castle and took a deep breath.

“She can’t be that bad.”

The door opened to reveal Spike.

“Oh. Hi Shade.”

“Hey Spike. I’m supposed to be meeting Twilight-“

“Yeah. She’s in the library with Starlight.”

He stepped to the side and let me in. I walked by, glancing at the dragon from the corner of my eye. He seemed upset.

Once I was in, Spike closed the door and led me to the library. He left me alone at the door and disappeared around the corner. What was wrong with him?

I opened the door and found Twilight and a mare sitting inside. Twilight smiled as I entered.

“Shade! I’m glad you could make it. I’d like you to meet my student, Starlight Glimmer.”

I walked forward and held out a hoof.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Starlight. I’m Shade.”

Starlight’s eyes darted over my body and her head tipped slightly.

“You’re...not a pony...are you?”

I smiled.

“I used to be a changeling before I had a run-in with Discord.”

She took a step back, a brief moment of fear crossing her eyes. Twilight put a hoof on her shoulder.

“It’s alright Starlight. He’s a friend. And he works with Princess Celestia.”

Fear turned to curiosity.

“Really? How did that happen?”

I chuckled.

“It’s a long, depressing story to be sure. The short version is that I have a talent that makes me invaluable to the Princesses. I absorb knowledge.”

“Absorb?”

I summoned a book from the nearby shelf and passed it to Starlight. Her eyes were bulging until I parted my mane to show off my stump of a horn.

“Unicorn. Just shorter than average. Now what book do you have there?”

“Um...The Magician’s Almanac.”

“That’s a good one. Pick a page.”

She opened to the middle of the book.

“Page 174?”

I thought for a moment. Ah!

“When summoning an apparition, whether it is from bones or illusion, one must always remember the primary steps of a summoning charm in their precise order. If these steps should be improperly ordered or all together skipped, the charm will dissipate and risk the expulsion of the magic energy that should have gone into the charm.”

I turned to Twilight.

“How was that?”

Twilight glanced at the book and nodded.

“Word for word.”

Starlight looked up from the book.

“That’s amazing! You can recall anything you’ve ever read?”

“Yup. All 84,328 books to be exact.”

Now Twilight’s eyes were bulging. I stifled my grin as best as I could.

“So Starlight. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Her ears dropped.

“None of it good I’m sure.”

“Not all, but some. You’ve got a long road ahead just like me. But Twilight is definitely the mare to learn from. She taught me a thing or two when I first showed up. Though I think it bugged her how fast I moved through the reading material she provided.”

Twilight regained her composure and chimed in.

“Friendship can’t be rushed Shade. No matter how much you read.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice. I’ve made plenty of mistakes along the way. I’m just glad I have friends that are willing to be patient.”

I turned to Starlight.

“And you’ve got those friends now too.”

Starlight smiled.

“I guess so.”

We sat down and talked for a while, sharing experiences from our former days. She listened intently as I described living in Everfree. I had to stop a few times to recompose myself. Reliving that time wasn’t easy.

Starlight shared her story of her town and her quest for revenge. It was amazing what she’d nearly accomplished. She was one of the more powerful unicorns in Equestria given the evidence. Twilight had been smart to take her under her wing.

“So why are you in Ponyville if you work in Canterlot?”

The question caught me off guard. It took a moment to form an answer.

“Oh I needed a vacation. One can only deal with comittee meetings and law scrolls for so long.”

Starlight nodded, but I think she knew I had dodged the question. I wasn't ready to be that open with her yet..

After we had some lunch, I took my leave. Twilight tried to get me to stay longer, but I denied. My social meter had dropped to nearly zero. It was time to rest. I made my way through town towards the boutique. I was halfway back when an intoxicating aroma halted me in the middle of the street. I took a good whiff and turned my head. The smell was coming from Sugarcube Corner.

“Well...I guess I could go for something sweet.”

I made my way to the bakery and opened the door. And then I almost tripped over a couple of infants. I was able to maintain my balance and stop myself from crushing the two little foals.

“Woah! Sorry about that!”

Mrs. Cake appeared from the back.

“How many times have I told you two not to play near the door!”

The foals ran away before their mother could catch them. She let out a huff of annoyance and turned to me.

“How can I help you dear?”

“It smells like something just came out of the oven!”

“Oh yes! I just finished up some cookies. How many would you like?”

“A small bag of them would be fine.”

She disappeared into the back again, leaving me alone. Or at least I was until Pinkie came down the stairs. She didn’t seem her normal self at first, but when she realized somepony else was in the room she put on a big smile.

“Hi Shade! How are you?”

In the seconds before I answered, I noticed a few things with Pinkie. Her mane was more disheveled than normal, which was saying something. Her eyes seemed a little more dull. And her tone was entirely wrong for being “happy”.

“I’m doing okay I guess. Could be better. That’s why I’m grabbing some cookies.”

“Oh! I smelled them too. I just thought I’d grab one or seven.”

She left the staircase, entering the room a little more. She wasn’t bouncing along like she did. I stepped toward her.

“Pinkie? What’s up?”

“Up? Nothing’s up. Unless you mean the ceiling or the sky or the sun or the moon or-“

I put a hoof on her shoulder and her voice faded. Now that I was closer I could see that her eyes were red in the corners.

“Rough day?”

She didn’t meet my gaze, instead staring at the floor.

“...Yeah.”

“I get it.”

“You seem like you’re doing fine though.”

“Well you taught me a few tricks, remember?”

“Oh yeah.”

A small smile crept onto her face. I reached around and gave her a hug. Her body pressed against mine as she grabbed hold of me. I felt her tremble a little and the slightest hint of moisture on my shoulder. I rubbed her back a little.

“It’s alright. Better days will come.”

“...yeah.”

She pulled away, wiping a tear from her cheek.

“What’s got you down?”

In that moment I realized I hadn’t told anypony else about why I was back. Part of me worried that she’d gossip about it, but another part of me knew she’d never betray my trust like that. I took a deep breath before starting.

“Well...I’m a pony now.”

She cocked her head to the side.

“Huh?”

“I might have tried to vaporize Discord a while back. He turned me into a full-fledged pony. And the biggest difference between species is that changelings can live a really long time. Now...”

“You’re going to die sooner than you thought?”

She caught on fast. I nodded.

“It’s been tough trying to come to terms with my new mortality. There’s still a lot of times where I can’t think about anything else.”

“That’s rough. Makes me feel silly for being sad over nothing.”

My brow furrowed.

“Don’t ever say that. You can’t help what you feel.”

“True. Life is a lot more complicated than I thought.”

“You can say that again.”

“Life is a lot more complicated than I thought.”

I met her eyes and a smile crept across her face. We both began to giggle as Mrs. Cake emerged with my bag of cookies.

“Here we are! Fresh from the oven!”

I thanked Mrs. Cake. She was about to say something else when the twins raced by.

“Oh! Those two!”

She ran after them without another word. I turned to Pinkie and held up the bag.

“Cookie?”

She smiled and reached into the bag. As soon as she pulled away I put my own hoof in-

The bag was empty...

My eyes shot to Pinkie, her cheeks full of the cookies I’d just received. She swallowed and smiled sheepishly.

“Oops...”

Two Decisions: One Smart, One Dumb

I paced back and forth, trying to comprehend the news I’d just received.

“So...there’s another?”

I turned to the lounge Rarity had set up against one of the boutique walls. Rarity was sitting on it with Starlight Glimmer next to her. My gaze was fixed on Starlight.

“What’s he like?”

Starlight shrugged.

“Kind of shy. He seemed nice enough. Especially for a changeling.”

I furrowed my brow at Starlight. She flashed a sheepish grin and cleared her throat as I continued pacing.

“What’s his name again?”

“Thorax.”

I nodded.

“Thorax... He’s young.”

Rarity chimed in.

“What makes you say that darling?”

I turned to the mares and sat down.

“The younger generations chose their own names. And there were a few sets of eggs that went with...buggy sounding names.”

Starlight leaned forward.

“So you didn’t choose your name?”

I shook my head.

“Names didn’t used to be a big deal for changelings.”

They both looked shocked at that comment. Rarity was the first to speak.

“So...Shade?”

I smiled.

“I picked that when I met Twilight. I’d never considered it before. It just...fit”

Starlight leaned forward, excitement in her eyes.

“So how old are you exactly? You talk about the generations of changelings like you’ve seen a lot of them.”

I chuckled. It was no wonder that Twilight took a liking to her. I saw a lot of similarities between the two.

“I’m nearly ninety.”

Starlight’s eyes widened at the thought. I turned to Rarity and smiled.

“Still like the idea of dating an older stallion?”

She threw a sly grin my direction.

“I said old, not ancient.”

I acted offended, which only led the two of us to start laughing. Starlight had composed herself again by that point.

“I didn’t realize changelings aged like that! There's so much we don’t know about!”

I stood up and approached the lounge.

“The changeling race has always been secretive. It’s been even more so since Chrysalis took over. She wants her enemies in the dark when it comes to her kind.”

I stopped next to Rarity, resting my head on her shoulder.

“I can’t believe another changeling got away from her. Maybe there’s a little hope for the rest.”

Rarity brushed my mane with her hoof.

“Maybe there is.”

Starlight stood up and stretched her hooves.

“Well I just thought I’d deliver the news. Sorry I don’t much more. Spike is the one who spent the most time with Thorax.”

Rarity turned to the unicorn, her expression turning puzzled.

“Spike? Why didn’t he come and tell us?”

Starlight shrugged.

“I don’t know. Twilight asked him if he was going to come tell the two of you, but he said he had something to do. And then he suggested I come.”

Rarity and I shared a quick look. Before I could say anything though, Rarity thanked Starlight and saw her out of the boutique.

Once the door was shut, Rarity turned to me, tears forming in her eyes.

“I’m horrible.”

“What?! No! Why would you say that?”

She wiped the tears away as she walked back to me.

“Spike. He’s always...had feelings for me...and I’ve never bothered to turn him away. And now I’ve gotten into a relationship with somepony else. I’ve probably crushed him!”

I pulled her into a hug and pet her mane.

“It’s alright. You don’t have to feel bad over this. You can’t help how he feels.”

“He’s always been such a good friend. I should have said something to him before now.”

I nodded.

“Maybe, but that’s in the past now. But maybe you can repair the damage a bit.”

I pulled away from Rarity and looked at her face, tears beginning to roll down her cheeks.

“Go talk to him. I’m sure he’d appreciate it.”

She wiped her cheeks and nodded.

“You’re right. I will.”

She walked over to a mirror, checking herself over. I assume she wanted to make herself presentable again. Once she was satisfied, she gave me a kiss on the cheek and left for Twilight’s.

I retreated to the bedroom and lay on the bed. My thoughts were consumed by changelings. Thorax had left the hive. He was living happily in the Crystal Empire. Of all the ponies to have a change of heart, I never would have expected it to be Princess Cadence and Shining Armor. Not after everything...

I sat up and shook my head. It was a lot to take in. Could there be more like him? Would changelings begin leaving the hive regularly? How was Chrysalis reacting?

Ugh! More unanswered questions! I was going to give myself a headache with this thinking. I need a distraction. I reached for my bag and pulled out a book I’d brought with me. As I pulled the book however, it pulled out another item.

Discord’s bottle.

I looked at it as it fell into my lap. Why was I still holding on to this thing? I shoved it back into the bag and opened my book.

The first third went by at a leisurely pace. But as I broke into the next section, I found my eyes wandering from the page to my bag. I scowled and reached inside for the bottle. It was warm to the touch. I stared at the clear liquid within. It seemed so...plain. And yet this elixir could provide anypony with enough life to last centuries. Life that had once been mine...

I shook my head.

“No. You’re nothing but trouble.”

“Who’s trouble darling?”

I nearly jumped out of my skin.

“Rare! You scared me!”

Rarity stepped through the doorway.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

Her eyes found the bottle.

“What is that?”

I felt a lump growing in my throat.

“It’s...nothing.”

She was unconvinced.

“Are you hiding something?”

“I...well...it’s just...”

Concern was filling Rarity's eyes. I held the bottle in front of her and sighed.

“Discord gave it to me.”

“Discord?”

“This is...my life.”

“What do you mean?”

I sat down on the bed and she joined me.

“All the extra years I would have had as a changeling. He bottled them up and gave them to me.”

Rarity stared at me for a moment before slowly sitting down.

“Why would he do that?”

“He called it a last temptation.”

She looked between the bottle and me.

“You mean...”

“I drink this...I live as long as I would have before. Centuries.”

Rarity was quiet for a few minutes, her eyes staring at the bottle.

“How...long have you had this?”

“Since Discord changed me.”

“That...that was months ago.”

“I know.”

“Why have you kept it?”

“I honestly don’t know. I was actually thinking of throwing it out just now.”

“But you were considering using it before?”

I put my face in my hooves.

“Tartarus Rarity. I was going to find the right time to tell you about it. But I kept forgetting about it and we got into our routine around here and I just let it gather dust in my bag rather than deal with it. Discord is just trying to screw with my head. And I'm finally done letting him.”

Her expression softened a little, but I could tell she was still a bit upset.

“I wish you had told me sooner, but I can tell you mean what you're saying. I'm sorry it's been a burden on you."

She held out a hoof and I placed the bottle in it. She held it up to the light for a moment before continuing.

"Life is short Shade. You have to make the most of it. And you’ve been put in a position to do that. I know you’re scared of the dark parts of living, but you can’t let that stop you from trying to find the light.”

I nodded.

"Agreed. And that thing is one dark part I'd like to put behind me."

Without thinking, I grabbed the bottle, dropped it on the floor, and stomped my hoof down on it. There was a satisfying ‘CRACK’ and then a surge of pain.

“Sweet Celestia!!”

Rarity stared in shock as I fell back and looked at my hoof. Several shards of glass had become embedded in my skin. After a few moments, Rarity came to her senses.

“Why did you do that?!”

She summoned a bag and began pulling out some bandages. I just stared at my hoof, glass and blood decorating the surface. I noticed a single drop of elixir rolling down one of the shards. A spike of dread pierced me as I watched it meet with my hoof and disappear. I felt the slightest tingle through my body.

"Dammit."

Rarity looked at me for a moment, seeming to know what had just occured.

"I doubt it was all contained within one drop. What's the worst it could do? Five? Ten years?"

She worked on removing the glass and wrapping my hoof.

“Come on. We’re going to the hospital. You need proper stitches.”

I slowly stood up, now having to put more wieght on my bad leg. I felt it cry out for mercy. How was I going to walk? Rairty seemed to read my mind and sighed.

“You’ll live you big dummy. You might need a wheelchair for now, but you'll live.”

I smiled as I leaned against her for support. If she could be this strong, so could I.

Reconciliation

Moving around proved more difficult than anticipated. I already had the bad leg from Everfree, but now I also had a hoof I couldn’t put weight on for a week while the wounds mend. So there I was wheeling out of the hospital. Stuck in a wheelchair for a week! I couldn’t help but mumble my frustration.

“Stop that. It’s your own fault.”

I looked at Rarity. She was walking beside me, using her magic to push the chair forward. Her annoyance with me was evident as I sighed.

“I know that. I just feel like a useless lump in this chair.”

“You can find things to do I’m sure. In fact you could help me! I’ve got a big order I’m trying to fill and could use an assistant to- No wait. That won’t work. I would need you to be fully mobile.”

“Well I refuse to just sit and do nothing for a week.”

That’s when a small miracle happened.

“Rarity! Shade! What happened?”

We both turned to find Twilight landing in front of us. I held up my bandaged hoof.

“I might have stepped on some glass. That plus my bum leg makes it impossible to walk properly.”

Twilight’s ears drooped.

“I’m so sorry. That must be difficult.”

“The difficult part will be not going crazy until I’m out of the chair.”

Her ears perked up again.

“You know, I could actually use your help with some work! I’ve got a lot of paperwork I’m still trying to get through.”

I couldn’t help but smile.

“You? Behind on paperwork?”

The princess furrowed her brow.

“I didn’t say that!”

Me and Rarity were trying not to laugh. Twilight relaxed a little and sighed.

“Okay. Maybe a little. There’s a lot of paperwork when you’re a princess.”

I chuckled.

“You don’t have to tell me. I could literally swim in the piles of papers that Celestia and Luna go through in a week.”

Twilight smiled.

“Does that mean you’ll help?”

“Sure! It’ll keep me occupied for at least the afternoon.”

Twilight shook her head

“You don’t know how much there is.”

I couldn’t help but flash my biggest grin.

“And you don’t remember how fast I am.”

————————

Twilight helped me wheel into the castle. I still found myself staring at the structure in wonder.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to this place.”

Twilight sighed.

“Yeah. I’m more comfortable than I used to be, but it’s never going to be like the library.”

I smiled, remembering my first days in Ponyville. So much had happened since then.

We arrived at Twilight’s study and she opened the doors.

“Son of a- Twilight! Just how far behind are you?!”

There were three stacks of paper on the desk. Twilight turned red at my question.

“Well...a lot has been happening. I promise I’m usually more on top of it. Don’t tell Celestia! I don’t want her to think I can’t handle it!”

I looked at the young alicorn for a few seconds before bursting into laughter.

“Twilight! That’s barely fifteen minutes work with me! I thought you’d have a little more than this.”

I couldn’t stop laughing. The longer I went, the more annoyed Twilight got.

“Hey! This is what me behind looks like!”

I wiped the tears from my eyes and took a deep breath.

“Okay Miss Exaggeration. Let’s take a look.”

She wheeled me over to the desk and I began perusing the papers. The more pages I read, the more speed I picked up. Soon I was reading a page every few seconds.

“Are you sure you’re getting everything?”

I didn’t even look up.

“Don’t worry Twilight. I don’t just skim through paperwork like Celestia.”

An audible gasp made me smile. I paused to glance up at the shock on Twilight’s face. My smile grew bigger as her shock deepened.

“You...you’re joking...right? Please say you’re joking!”

I shrugged and returned to my reading, leaving the princess to process the imperfections of her mentor. Maybe it was a little cruel, but I knew that Celestia wanted Twilight to realize that she was just as prone to faults as anypony. So why not give her a nudge?

I set the last of the pages down and sighed.

“Sign off on the two petitions, talk to the Mayor about her request regarding the flags, and send an approval to the delegate in Las Pegasus.”

“Okay. What else?”

“That’s it. Most of this is just the details.”

“But details are important!”

“I understand. But taking into account your prior paperwork, I made a guess as to how you’d best judge these. So all that leaves you is to provide two signatures, an approval, and one face-to-face.”

Twilight stared in shock again. This only served to confuse me.

“What?”

“You judged how I’d answer?”

“Yeah...that’s kind of what I do. Celestia entrusted me to act as her and Luna’s voice.”

“How exactly do you judge how they’d react to something?”

“Well...I guess I’ve gotten a good sense of their attitude towards different things from reviewing all the logged paperwork in Canterlot. A lot of your stuff is there too Twilight. That’s how I was able to do the same for you. A lot of the more routine stuff can be streamlined, leaving time open for personal things or for bigger issues.”

Twilight sat down, taking it all in.

“So you help make their lives easier by taking on the more...”

“Boring jobs.”

“Do they really think this sort of stuff is boring?”

Uh-oh. I might be overdoing the “not a perfect leader” bit.

“That’s not... Look at it this way Twilight.”

I turned my chair towards her.

“Imagine you had to listen to the same arguments every day.”

“Okay.”

“That could get a bit tiresome don’t you think?”

“Sure.”

“Now try to settle those arguments every day for a thousand years.”

Her ears fell.

“Oh my... So it’s sort of a...breather for them having you take over the...every day stuff?”

I smiled.

“Exactly! Celestia used to handle this stuff constantly! But when she was given the opportunity to take a break from it, it was a nice change. And it’s allowed her to focus on some of the bigger dealings in Equestria.”

Her ears returned to normal.

“I think I understand now! So you really help ease their minds when it comes to Equestria functioning day to day!”

“Now you’ve got it. And that’s what I just did for you as well. What would have taken hours out of your day will now take you thirty minutes tops. And that will leave the rest of your day open for yourself or any offer issue that might come up.”

She smiled.

“That’s such a great talent! You can amass huge quantities of knowledge and form a near-perfect model of how a pony thinks!”

An uncomfortable chuckle escaped me.

“Well...it’s not exactly new or anything. I used to do this for Chrysalis all the time. I was the only changeling who could really figure out how ponies thought. Maybe that’s what attracted me so much to the lifestyle..”

“Using a gift like yours to help others is vastly different than using it to further evil. You might not see the difference, but I do. Trust me. What you can do is amazing! You should be grateful for a gift like that.”

I didn’t mean to respond, but my mouth began working on it’s own.

“Some gift. All the info I gathered on Cadance painted a perfect portrait of her and somehow you were left out of that picture.”

As soon as the words were out I froze. My eyes were locked on Twilight, waiting for a reaction. I had never told her about my part in the Invasion.

“You were the one that spied on Cadance?”

I slowly nodded and Twilight took a breath.

“So...all of Chrysalis’ information came from you?”

I nodded again.

“I...I’m sorry Twilight. I should have told you sooner. But I know how close you and Cadance are. Well I know now. I didn’t want it to be a wedge between us. You were my first friend...”

Twilight stepped forward until she was right in front of me.

“Because of you, Chrysalis failed. You never knew about me, so she never knew either. You’re probably the reason everything went hooves up.”

My head dropped downward.

“No. Really. You don’t say.”

“That’s not a bad thing Shade. Not by a long shot.”

She put a hoof under my chin and lifted my head back up.

“I would have lost my brother and Cadance that day if you had known everything. And the fact that you’ve told me your part in those events only shows me that you feel very differently about that day than you used to.”

She leaned forward and began hugging me.

“Thank you for telling me. I’m so happy to have a friend like you.”

I felt a tear roll down my cheek as I returned the hug.

————————

I rolled into the boutique in a better mood. The heart-to-heart with Twilight had left me feeling a little lighter.

“Rarity? You in?”

“In the kitchen darling.”

I rolled to the kitchen and was surprised to discover Fluttershy sitting at the table. She smiled as I entered the room.

“Hello Shade!”

“Hello Fluttershy! I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

“Rarity invited me over. She told me about your accident. I’m so sorry!”

I glanced at Rarity and she shook her head. She hadn’t told Fluttershy all the details.

I rolled my chair over to the table and settled in.

“Well thanks for coming to check on me. You don’t need to fuss.”

“Oh I don’t mind! I like checking in on friends. Especially if they might need help.”

“What did Rarity tell you exactly? It’s just some stitches.”

“She said you stepped on some glass and really hurt your hoof! And now you’re in a wheelchair for a week!”

“It’s nothing Fluttershy. I made a stupid mistake is all. I shouldn’t have smashed that bottle to begin with.”

“You smashed a bottle? Why?”

I paused for a moment, gathering my thoughts.

“Well...it’s a long story.”

She seemed confused. I glanced at Rarity, but she was busy preparing some snacks. I mulled it over and decided my course.

“It involves Discord.”

Fluttershy’s eyes produced about ten emotions at once. They finally settled on frustration.

“What did he do now?”

Rarity had stopped to look at us. I could tell she wanted to know how much I’d say.

“Did Twilight or Rarity tell you that I’m a full-fledged pony?”

Fluttershy perked up slightly.

“Twilight told me! But she didn’t explain at all but...is that what happened? Discord changed you?”

“To say the least.”

“But that doesn’t explain your hoof...”

“Let’s just say he went about my transformation in his own way. And that led to some personal difficulties and depression. I broke a bottle due to all of that.”

I didn’t need to tell her the whole story. But what I told her was enough to make her tear up.

“I’m....I’m so sorry Shade. He knows better than this.”

“Fluttershy, it’s not your fault.”

She wiped away her tears and sniffled.

“I know. But I’m still sorry. He’s my friend. I should be working on his compulsive behavior with him.”

Before I could say anything else, Fluttershy looked up and shouted.

“DISCORD!!”

I’d never heard the quiet pegasus scream before! The volume made me jump in my chair. Barely a second after she spoke, a flash of light introduced the draconequus to the room.

“Yes my dearest Fluttershy?”

Nopony said a word. Discord began looking around the room. His eyes found me and his smile disappeared.

“Oh. This isn’t a social call?”

I waved my bandaged hoof at him.

“Good to see you too.”

“Did you really smash that bottle? You could have just given it back to me!”

“A-hem.”

We both turned to Fluttershy. What I saw made me want to crawl in a hole and die. Fluttershy was using the Stare. I had heard about her ability, but I had no idea it was so...petrifying. Discord seemed to be frozen as well. He tried to smile.

“Fluttershy-”

“Don’t!”

I swear I saw the mighty Spirit of Chaos flinch. Fluttershy stood up and stretched her wings. She took off and rose to Discord’s level.

“I don’t know what happened exactly, but am I safe to assume that Shade’s accident was the result of you tampering with his life?”

Discord scratched his head.

“Well...”

“What have I said about messing with ponies lives in a serious way? They're not toys for you to play with!”

“Come now Fluttershy. You can’t expect me to go cold turkey! I have to pull at strings every so often!”

“Pranks and such are harmless Discord. Those I can tolerate. But causing mental and emotional trauma?!”

“I wasn’t trying-“

“Don’t even.”

He clamped his mouth shut. I couldn’t help but stare at the sight. The Lord of Chaos was being put in his place by possibly the nicest pony I knew.

“If you think I’m going to let you do this without consequences, you’ve got another thing coming mister!”

Discord was beginning to shrink. With every syllable out of Fluttershy, his body compacted. Fluttershy didn’t seem phased by this at all.

“I have a right mind to call off any future tea parties and never speak to you again! So you’d better start apologizing or you’re going to wish you were still made of stone!”

Discord was the size of a doll now. All three of us were staring at the tiny draconequus.

He slowly approached me, looking up as he grew closer. As he spoke, I could tell he was forcing himself.

“Look...I’m still working on the whole...reformed thing. I...apologize for any wrong I did...and want you to know that I didn’t mean to...hurt you.”

He forced a smile before turning back to Fluttershy.

“Happy now?”

She glared down at him. Discord turned back to me and sighed.

“Okay. I think you know why I did what I did. Remember our conversation on the train?”

I cocked an eyebrow.

“Maybe.”

Discord twiddled his thumbs and continued.

“Well...you were right and I was wrong to go about it that way. I promise I won’t do it again.”

I nodded.

“I’ll take it.”

Discord shot up to his full height instantly.

“Excellent! Now we’re all friends!”

He pulled all of us into a group hug. As soon as we were free, the mood changed rapidly. We began taking and laughing over the events of our day.

But Fluttershy had one more thing to say.

“Discord? Why did you change Shade into a pony?”

Discord narrowed his eyes.

“He tried to vaporize me in Canterlot.”

I sipped my tea and shrugged.

“I’m sorry..."

Another sip.

"...that I missed. I’ll aim better next time.”

He scowled down at me.

“There won’t be a next time! You’ll never land a hit as long as you live.”

Fluttershy frowned.

“Be nice!”

Discord looked at her.

“I am being nice!”

In that moment he looked away, I let a spark of magic fly out of my horn. It jumped from me to Discord and landed right on his hindquarters.

“AAAUGH!!”

Discord flew up a foot or two and glared at me. I couldn’t help but laugh. It only took a moment for the girls to realize what happened and they began laughing too. Discord lowered himself into his seat and leaned over to me.

“That’s your one shot. You’re not getting another.”

Peace Put On Pause

I got in touch with Celestia about my injury. She was more than understanding about it. We kept writing back and forth over the next few weeks. I’d provide insight when I could, but it wasn’t the same as being there in Canterlot. It was over one of our correspondence that she presented her idea.

Dear Shade,

Twilight told me about you helping her with her paperwork. It made me realize that Luna and I aren’t the only ones who can benefit from your talents. As Twilight is still gaining experience, and you’re pursuing your own relationship, I think it might be a benefit to everyone if you split your time between Ponyville and Canterlot. Think about it and let me know.

Celestia

I stared at the scroll for several minutes. Split my time? Would that work?

“I mean...I suppose they survived before I was around...”

When Rarity got in from her errands I showed her the letter. She perused it and her face lit up.

“So you’d be staying here more?”

“I suppose so!”

She pulled me into a hug.

“That’s wonderful news!”

As I let the situation sink in, I felt a smile growing. I embraced Rarity and sighed.

“This is good.”

I pulled away, still smiling.

“I guess I’ll go give Twilight the news then.”

Rarity nodded.

“Of course! She’ll be so excited to have you around.”

“What about you? You aren’t sick of me yet?”

She pulled me close again and kissed me. As our lips parted, she whispered in my ear.

“Does that answer that for you?”

I couldn’t help myself and whispered back.

“I don’t know. I think I need a little more convincing.”

She giggled and jumped away.

“You’ll have to catch me!”

I raced after Rarity as she ran up the stairs.

———————

After delaying myself the entire afternoon with Rarity, I’d decided to tell Twilight the next day.

When I woke up the next morning, Rarity had already left.

I went downstairs for some breakfast and found a note.

Starlight asked us over to Twilight’s. I’ll be back soon. Or I’ll see you there when you come to talk to Twilight.

Love, Rarity

I grabbed a muffin and scarfed it down. I wonder what Starlight wanted..

After a few more muffins I got ready to leave. I looked around the boutique, realizing that I’d be living here half the time. I couldn’t help but smile.

I left the boutique and walked through town towards Twilight’s castle. I was sure she’d be thrilled at the news of me sticking around more.

As I made my way through town, I saw Starlight walking along with her friend Trixie. They seemed to be going somewhere together.

“Where are you off to Starlight?”

She saw me and waved.

“Hey Shade. I’m actually heading to...my old village.”

I couldn’t help but look shocked.

“That’s a big step. You feel ready?”

She looked nervous.

“I honestly don’t know. They invited me back for a festival.”

“Well that’s not so bad! If they invited you I’m sure they’ve forgiven you.”

Her ears perked up.

“Yeah. I’m still nervous though.”

Trixie chimed in.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie has chosen to join her best friend on this journey! Starlight won’t be alone in her breakdown!”

We both turned and stared at Trixie. She forced a grin and stepped backward.

“I think I forgot to secure something in my cart.”

She disappeared and I chuckled.

“You’ll have to tell me sometime just how you two became friends.”

Starlight smiled.

“She’s a hoof-ful, but she has her moments.”

“Would I be right in guessing your trip is why the girls met up at the castle?”

She nodded.

“I just wanted their advice. They just saw us off a little bit ago.”

I began to walk away.

“I’m sure I’ll run into them then. Good luck! I’m sure everything will be great!”

I continued on my way to Twilight’s. I was proud of Starlight. It was a big step confronting the past.

My steps slowed as I thought more about it. That was a luxury I didn’t have. I couldn’t walk back into the hive and ask forgiveness. It wasn’t even something I wanted.

But the idea of some closure was nice. Would it ever be possible for me?

I reached Twilight’s and knocked on the door. It opened to reveal Spike. Or more accurately, Spike’s eye.

“Yes?”

“Hey Spike. I was coming to talk to Twilight.”

“Do you have an appointment?”

“What?”

“Well she’s a princess. She doesn’t just see anypony.”

I stared at him for a second. Then it hit me.

“Very...funny. Look Spike, I know we might not be in a great spot with each other, but I hope we can mend the fence and become friends again.”

He opened the door further, revealing his whole face.

“Right. Friends. We can be friends again.”

He started walking away. Weird...

I stepped inside after him and closed the door.

“Hello!”

I looked over and saw Twilight.

“How can I help you? Do you have a friendship problem?”

I froze. Something wasn’t right...

That’s when I felt it.

An overwhelming magic permeating the air.

Changeling magic...

I looked at “Twilight” and chuckled.

“You’re so funny Princess! I was just coming by to tell you that your new quills are in at the shop.”

“Ah. The quills. I’ll...pick those up later. Thank you.”

The door to the map room opened and Applejack’s head popped out.

“Is everything okay Twilight?”

I focused on Applejack. She was putting off the same energy. In fact...the map room was overflowing. It hit me what that meant.

They were all gone..

How? Starlight had just seen them. How had they moved so fast?

I slowly stepped back.

“Well...I’ll just be on my way Princess. I just wanted to deliver that message.”

She looked at me and nodded.

“Thank you.”

I turned to find “Spike” holding the door open. I nodded to him and walked outside. The door slammed shut behind me.

My heart was beginning to race. They were gone. Somehow the changelingns had taken them by surprise. What could I do?

My eyes lit up.

“Celestia.”

I hurried to the train station.

“When’s the next train to Canterlot?!”

The ticket pony jumped as I appeared.

“No need to shout. In a couple hours.”

“But I need to get there now!”

He shrugged.

“Sorry.”

I felt my heat in my throat. What was I supposed to do?

My head began to pound. It felt like the headaches I used to get.

“Come on! Think!”

I felt a spark from my horn. My mind raced, trying to find something I could use.

There!

My horn kept sparking. I had never used the spell before, but I had to try. For Twilight. For Rarity. For everypony.

‘FLASH’

Everything went white.

When the light faded, I was standing at the front gate of Canterlot. I couldn’t help but smile.

“Yes!!”

I ran into the city. I had to get to Celestia and Luna. I just hope I wasn’t too late..

———————

I burst into the throne room.

“Celestia!”

I looked up to the thrones and saw her sitting there. My heart fell into my stomach.

I was too late...

“Celestia” leaned forward.

“How can I help you?”

I took a deep breath and composed myself.

“Sorry. A little out of breath.”

I approached the throne, feeling the energy. It was a common foot soldier. I would have guessed Chrysalis would take front and center. Where was she hiding.

“I got those scrolls delivered for you.”

“I don’t recall sending out any scrolls..”

“Very funny. I’ve only been gone three days. Don’t act like your memory is that bad.”

“Oh. Yes. You got me!”

I faked a yawn.

“Well I’ll go let Luna know I’m back so our lessons can resume.”

“You don’t need to bother her!”

I stopped.

“Oh? Is she asleep?”

“...Yes. You wouldn’t want to bother her during the day.”

I nodded.

“You’re absolutely right. I’ll just go to my room and rest then. Let me know if you need any help with anything!”

I trotted away, glancing behind to see if “Celestia” was watching me. She was. Damn.

Once I was out of sight, I ran down the hall. The air was clearing up. Was it only her?

I made my way to Luna’s wing of the castle. The air began to grow thick with magic again. I slowed down and peeked around the corner to Luna’s room.

There were several changelings trying to get through the door. From what I could tell Luna had set up a good defense. They weren’t making much headway.

I stepped back and focused. With a flash of green my appearance changed. I hadn’t used the full ability of my magic in so long. I found a nearby mirror and checked myself over.

“Not bad.”

I glanced around the hall and realized something else. There weren’t any guards patrolling. They’d probably been sent elsewhere or locked up.

I hurried back towards my room and locked the door behind me. I had an idea, but it was a long shot. I thought hard.

Sleeping spells.

I cast the first one that came to mind. My vision became cloudy and I felt my body grow heavy.

————————

I found myself in a black abyss.

“Luna!”

My voice felt muffled.

“Luna!”

Everything was murky.

“LUNA!!!”

There it was! A point of light. I began running towards it.

Suddenly I burst into the meadow I’d come to know in my dreams. I collapsed, catching my breath.

“Shade!”

I looked up to see Luna running to me.

“I’m so glad it’s you! I thought they’d capture you for sure.”

We embraced for what felt like an eternity. I could feel her tears on my shoulder.

“They’ve got her. They’ve got Celestia.”

“I know. They got Twilight and the girls too.”

She pulled away, the shock evident.

“They’re moving faster than before.”

“I know. This is different. Chrysalis is trying to take out all the royalty before attempting a full invasion. It’s risky, but obviously effective.”

“We have to figure out how to fight back. But I’m trapped in my bedroom.”

I nodded.

“I saw that. How long can you hold them off?”

“As long as they don’t throw more changelings at the door, I think I can keep it up for a while.”

“How long have they been trying to get you?”

“A few hours.”

“They’ll probably double their efforts before long.”

I began pacing around the meadow.

“I haven’t sensed Chrysalis anywhere nearby. That makes me think she’s still at the hive. And I’d imagine that’s where she’s got everypony. But that’s no help to us. We have no way of helping while we’re stuck in here.”

Twilight and the girls would have been all over this if they were here. But they were the ones in trouble now. Who could help us?

“Wait...”

I turned back to Luna.

“Starlight!”

“Starlight Glimmer?”

“She was heading out of town when I saw her. They probably didn’t even think to take her!”

Luna’s eyes lit up.

“I know what to do! It’ll be night before long. I can get to her dreams! But...”

“But?”

“That will weaken my defenses...”

I sat down.

“So if you contact her, you’ll be gone too.”

She nodded.

“I know, but she may be Equestria’s only hope.”

We sat in silence for a minute as we came to terms with the plan. I spoke first.

“She’s the only hope.”

“Yes.”

“You realize you’re volunteering to be a hostage?”

“Of course.”

I nodded and pulled her into another hug. She whispered to me.

“Keep an eye on everypony for us Shade.”

“You have my word.”

————————

I woke up and made sure my disguise was still intact. From there I left my room and began patrolling the halls.

I began to hear voices as I approached a corner. Peeking around I saw two changelings. They weren’t disguised whatsoever. If they weren’t hiding, that could only mean they were in full control of the castle.

I emerged from the adjacent hall and walked towards them. They didn’t even take notice of me. I was blending in perfectly.

I rounded another corner and found “Celestia”. She paused as I entered her field of vision.

“I don’t recognize you.”

“I just arrived. You’re the one in charge.”

“Of course I’m in charge! That’s why I’m Celestia!”

A flash of green revealed the changeling. He bared his fangs at me.

“Who are you to question me?”

I hissed back at him. His eyes narrowed.

“Where are your fangs?”

I reached up and felt my mouth.

“Damn. How did I forget those.”

I lunged forward, catching him by surprise. A swift kick from my hooves knocked him out before he could call out.

I looked around to make sure nopony was around. All clear.

I dragged the changeling into the nearest room and conjured restraints. I made sure to gag him before leaving.

Before I stepped out of the room, I changed my appearance again. I looked in a mirror, double checking everything this time. I made sure the wings looked real enough. Without my own, they were just pure illusion. If anypony tried to touch them, I’d be in trouble.

After I was satisfied with my appearance, I I left the room and took a deep breath.

“I’ll protect the kingdom until you’re back. I hope Starlight is up for the challenge.”

I began walking down the hall. Even with the impending threat, I couldn’t help but chuckle softly.

“I could get used to your height Celestia. Maybe I should consider being an alicorn.”

I continued down the hall, fully confident in my Celestia disguise. No changeling would know the difference. Now I just had to make sure the horde didn’t destroy the castle.

“What a day..”

A New Leader

The entire ordeal was leaving me on edge. I wanted nothing more than to scream at the top of my lungs. But then something happened...

Love. A surge of love like I hadn’t felt since the first Invasion. But it was from a great distance.

All the other changelings felt it too. They began flooding the throne room. I sat on Celestia’s throne, doing my best to keep calm. One of the changelings stepped forward.

“What do we do? Where is all of that love coming from?”

I thought for a moment. It became obvious where the source was, but I had to spin it properly.

“It must be...the hive! The Queen must have gathered a great amount of love! We should return at once!”

Several of them gave me odd looks.

“Leave? But we’ve taken the castle. Shouldn’t we hold it?”

I looked down on the miniature horde.

“Chrysalis has succeeded with her plan. And now a source of love has emanated from the hive. That can only be her call for us to return! Do you all really want to miss out on the greatest feast we’ve ever seen?”

They all began to nod and mutter their agreement. I stood tall and motioned towards the South.

“Let’s go!”

They all cheered and took to the air. I walked down the steps and watched as they all flew out through the doors. Soon there wasn’t a single changeling left in the castle. I sighed in relief.

“I can’t believe that worked.”

I hurried down to the old dungeons under the castle. Sure enough I found the entire staff and guard locked up. As soon as the first pony saw me they began crying.

“Celestia..”

Dozens of eyes found me and cheers started echoing through the old halls. I opened the cell door and everypony came streaming out. They all crowded me, all thanking me at once. I smiled and nodded.

“You’re all so welcome. But we need to make sure the castle is secure.”

I looked at the guards.

“Go floor to floor. Search every room and make sure we’re safe.”

They all saluted and raced off down the corridor. I looked at the remaining staff.

“We need to make sure the rest of the city is okay. I need a coordinated effort to insure public safety.”

They nodded and dispersed. All that left was two ponies. Luckily I knew both of them.

“Rain Cloud, Gold Feather. I’ll need you’re help more than anypony.”

Rain Cloud smiled.

“Anything Celestia.”

I looked up and down the corridor to make sure we were alone.

“I believe the changelings have been defeated. That means everypony should be returning soon. Including Celestia and Luna.”

They looked at me for a second before they began to understand. Gold Feather stepped in front of Rain Cloud.

“Who are you?”

I smiled and sighed. A halo of green surrounded my body and I returned to normal.

“Sorry about all of that.”

Rain Cloud smiled.

“Shade!”

She ran around Gold Feather and hugged me.

“How did you get here? I thought you were out of town.”

I pulled away.

“I got back yesterday. A few bits of luck and I was posing as the leader of the invasion squad.”

Gold Feather looked wary.

“That was...changeling magic.”

I looked at him, realizing he didn’t know.

“It’s okay Gold Feather. It’s just a façade. I’m still me.”

I turned to leave.

“Now as far as everypony knows, Celestia and Luna are fine now. I believe they are too, but we’ll want to make sure this place is put back together and running like they’re here.”

Rain Cloud nodded.

“Then when they return it will be seamless. Most ponies might not even notice they’re not here yet.”

I nodded.

“Exactly. We make sure things are back to normal. No need for there to be a panic.”

Gold Feather finally returned to the moment.

“So make sure that everything and everypony is back to their normal duties and act for Celestia in her stead until she’s back?”

“Exactly”

They looked at each other and nodded. Without another word they ran ahead. I joined them on the main floor and the three of us began delegating. Once ponies started seeing me, the Right Hoof, they didn’t question anything else. To them that meant everything must be okay. We worked tirelessly for an hour. Reports came back that most of Canterlot had been unaware of anything. The terror had been confined to the castle.

The guards returned with a changeling. I recognized him immediately. The one I had tied up. He didn’t struggle as the guards brought him forward.

“Where are the others? What have you done with them?”

I nodded to the guards and they stepped back. I looked back at the changeling.

“They’ve all retreated. Did you feel that surge earlier?”

“Yes.”

“That was the call to return to your hive. Count yourself lucky we aren’t a vengeful race. Go home before I change my mind.”

I shot a bolt from my horn and the bonds dissolved. The changeling stretched his legs and snarled.

“Fool! We’ll be back.”

He flew off at top speed. The guards began to pursue. I called them back.

“Stop. He’s not worth it.”

The guards came to a halt and went back to their search.

The moment it was just the three of us again, the main doors opened.

Celestia and Luna entered the castle.

I couldn’t help myself. I raced forward and jumped on them. They pulled me into a group hug and I started to cry.

“I thought I’d never see you two again.”

Celestia squeezed me tight.

“I thought Chrysalis had gotten you. I was so worried.”

Luna chimed in.

“I wasn’t. I knew you’d be okay.”

I lightly punched her shoulder and laughed.

“How about you two don’t go getting captured again anytime soon?”

————————

The white light died down and I found myself back at the Ponyville train station. I shook my head to clear it.

“Can’t make that a regular thing.”

I ran towards Twilight’s castle. I don’t know what drew me there first, but I just knew they’d all be there first. I burst through the front door without a thought. I heard voices coming from the map room. I raced in and found all the girls and Spike brushing themselves off. As soon as Rarity saw me she stopped fixing her mane. She raced to me without a word. I grabbed her as tight as I could and didn’t let go. We both started sobbing as soon as we locked together. I couldn’t talk above a whisper.

“I thought I lost you.”

“Never.”

I felt more bodies gather as the girls came in for a group hug. I let the warmth wash over me as we continued our reunion.

———————

I sat with the others as Starlight described her story to us. I couldn’t believe my ears.Chrysalis was gone!Driven from her kingdom. A new leader. And...

I sat forward.

“What do you mean they changed?”

Starlight looked at me.

“Well...just that. They changed. When the changelings started giving their love they transformed. They look really different now.”

I sat back. Giving love transforms you? That didn’t make any sense. I’d been giving love for a while now, hadn’t I? Especially since I started seeing Rarity. I glanced at her. She was still listening to Starlight. I thought back over our relationship. When we’d started to see each other I’d been having my buildup problems. Could that have stunted the flow of magic to such an extreme?

I played back the days in my head. Could I really have inhibited myself? Transformation, even natural, wasn’t an easy magic. It took an enormous amount of energy. That would have more than likely taken care of any buildup I had had. And that much magic would have been noticeable...

My mind stopped. There it was...

It was the night Rarity and I had first been together. It was late and we were sleeping under the gazebo.

I had felt a headache more intense than anything previously. My skin had felt like it was boiling. And it was because I’d been thinking about how much love I had for Rarity...

A bolt of magic fired into the sky like a firework...

As my mind drifted back to the present i began to hear voices.

“Shade?”

“Are you okay?”

“Darling what’s wrong?”

Tears were rolling down my cheeks. How long had I been crying? I wiped the tears and took a deep breath.

“Sorry. It’s just...incredible that she’s gone.”

Rarity pulled me close and brushed my mane.

“It’s okay. She won’t hurt anypony again.”

I felt my body start to shiver. Luckily Starlight had finished her story by then. The girls began to part ways, leaving me, Rarity, and Twilight in the map room. Twilight leaned over and put her hoof on mine.

“What’s wrong?”

I took a deep breath.

“My magic...it tried to change me. But I was still so messed up after everything...”

The tears started again. Rarity wrapped her hooves around me. Twilight looked thoughtful, her eyes lighting up after a few moments.

“Maybe you could have been a fully-realized changeling, but you’ve become something even more amazing Shade.”

I looked at the lavender alicorn.

“And what’s that?”

“You’ve been put in the unique position of being a part of both worlds. You’ve gained knowledge and skills that have given you advantages as both a pony and a changeling. And it’s because of what you’ve been through. You might think it’s somehow a flaw not to be like the rest of the changelings, but I promise you it’s your greatest strength.”

A small smile crept onto my face.

“Thanks Twilight.”

She smiled and stood up.

“I’m sure you’ll need some time to recuperate. But maybe you can come help me out in a couple days?”

I nodded as Rarity and I stood up to leave.

“You can count on me.”

She smiled and left the room. I turned to Rarity and smiled.

“I don’t know about you, but I definitely could use a few days of sleep.”

Rarity smiled.

“Let’s go home.”

We walked side-by-side out of the castle and made our way to the boutique. Twilight was right. If I had changed then, I doubt I’d be where I am now. And that gave me more satisfaction than knowing Chrysalis had been dethroned. I could feel my heart pounding still. I felt a lot of hurt over the past few days. But I had to believe that there were better days ahead. In fact, I knew there were.

I paced the floor of Twilight’s library. My nerves were shot. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been so nervous. Starlight and her band of heroes were being honored for saving Equestria. Twilight had arranged for me to meet Thorax after the ceremony. So here I was waiting in the library.

“What’s taking so long?”

The door opened and I spun around. Twilight stepped in.

“Sorry. I was having a small crisis. But it’s all better now!”

She stepped in all the way and opened the door.

“Shade, I’d like to introduce you to Thorax, the King of the changelings.”

Thorax stepped forward and I took him in. He was tall, green, and very...buggish.

“I don’t know if I’m really a King, Twilight...”

His eyes found me and he fell silent for a few seconds. When he found his voice, it wavered a little.

“Oh...wow...”

He stepped towards me.

“You’re...I mean...”

I nodded.

“My name is Shade. It’s nice to meet you Thorax.”

I held out a hoof and he took it with enthusiasm.

“I can’t believe you’re still alive! Not that we wanted you dead of course. Well...Chrysalis did. Especially after everything.”

I kept nodding.

“I’m sure she did. I’m glad to know she’s gone now.”

“Yes! We’re all really happy! I bet there’s a lot of the hive that would want to see you again!”

That made me pause.

“Well..I..I mean...”

His ears dropped.

“Sorry. I’m overwhelming you.”

I regained my composure.

“You just surprised me is all.”

“What have you been up to since Canterlot?”

“Hmm...where to begin? Lost in a forest for a year, nearly killed by timberwolves, saved by ponies, learned the magic of friendship, and now I work for Celestia.”

His eyes grew huge.

“Woah. That’s...a lot.”

I chuckled.

“You don’t know the half of it.”

I began pacing around him.

“Starlight said you guys went through a transformation. I didn’t expect it to be so drastic though.”

Thorax looked embarrassed.

“Yeah. We were all pretty surprised. But this is what it looks like when our kind give love instead of taking it.”

As I came to a stop in front of him, he began looking me over.

“You look like you’ve made some changes yourself. You look like a mix between the two species.”

“I was leaning more towards a pony look when I made the adjustments.”

He looked surprised.

“Adjustments? You used permanent form magic?”

I nodded.

“I was afraid my magic would get me in trouble. So I altered my body instead.”

“Wow. That takes a lot of skill. But I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised with you.”

Twilight interrupted.

“Sorry, but the way you two are talking makes it sound like you know each other. Or at least that you know Shade, Thorax.”

Thorax nodded.

“Everyone knows him. He’s one of the most skilled changelings Chrysalis ever had. His knowledge was her greatest strength.”

I chuckled.

“Is it any wonder that her latest plan fell apart like it did?”

Twilight stared at me.

“I didn’t know you were such an integral part of the hive!”

“I couldn’t have been that important. I was left to die after all.”

Thorax cleared his throat.

“If I might?”

We both looked at the changeling.

“Chrysalis was irate over the Invasion. At first she blamed all of us for not doing enough, but soon she shifted to blaming you.”

“No surprise.”

“And she wanted you to suffer for your...mistake.”

He glanced at Twilight and back to me. I nodded.

“She knows about my part in it Thorax.”

“Oh! Ok. Well once she knew where you were she was more than happy to let you starve and die. And then-“

I held up a hoof.

“Wait...you said Chrysalis knew I was in Everfree?”

“Yeah. She knows where all of us are. Or at least she did. That power might be gone since we destroyed her throne.”

I sat down and thought over that cursed year.

“When did she know?”

“Um....about a week after Canterlot?”

I felt my eye twitch. Twilight sat next to me and put a hoof on my shoulder.

“It’s okay Shade.”

“She knew...”

Thorax stepped forward.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

I looked up at him.

“It’s not your fault. I...I should have guessed. Of course she knew!”

Twilight stood up and walked to the door.

“I’ll be right back.”

She left the room and I felt my legs tremble. My gaze hardened into a glare. Thorax took a step backward.

“I’m...I’m sorry. I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re feeling.”

“Just answer one question for me.”

He nodded. I felt tears building up.

“Why didn’t you kill her?”

Thorax’s eyes grew to the size of saucers.

“I...we...how could we?”

“I could think of several dozen ways. There’s hundreds of you and one of her.”

“It wasn’t going to happen!”

That made me pause.

“You...you considered it?”

Thorax frowned.

“You think you’re the only one who’s been affected by her cruelty? Every one of us has suffered at her hoof!”

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. But...you see where I’m coming from don’t you?”

It was Thorax’s turn to sigh.

“Of course I do. But you realize what you’d have been asking the changelings to do? I don’t know if any of us could ever go as far as to kill her. Even if Chrysalis is a cruel monster...she’s still our mother.”

I heard a quiet gasp from behind Thorax. We both turned to discover Twilight and Rarity standing in the doorway.

The gasp had come from Twilight. She was visibly shocked at the revelation. I glanced at Rarity. She had tears in her eyes. I couldn’t meet her gaze.

They slowly stepped into the room. Thorax stepped back.

“Maybe I should go.”

I shook my head.

“No. You don’t have to. I’m sorry for putting you on the spot like that. That was unfair of me to do.”

He looked at me and sighed again.

“No. In all honesty, you had every right. You’re the oldest.”

Twilight couldn’t help herself.

“What do you mean the oldest?”

Thorax glanced between me and her. I slowly nodded. I looked at Rarity. She was still holding back her tears. Thorax turned to Twilight.

“Shade is the firstborn of Chrysalis. He’s the oldest changeling born under her reign. And that also means he’s my older brother. Well...half-brother.”

Twilight slowly turned her gaze to me.

“Does that make you...a prince?”

I shook my head quickly.

“No. I was never that. Thorax has far more claim then I ever did.”

Thorax shook his head in return.

“I don’t think so. I think everyone would gladly follow you if you were back at the hive.”

I looked at the changeling in shock.

“You can’t be serious.”

“I am. Even if Chrysalis treated you like a common grunt, we all knew you were a lot stronger than the rest of us. You’ve always had the respect of every changeling.”

I stared at him for several seconds, trying to take in this new information. In the interlude, Rarity approached me.

“Shade, maybe you should take a step back. Let’s not discuss this right now.”

I shook my head.

“No. I won’t leave something like this for later. Thorax...I know you think I’d be a good leader, but trust me when I say this.”

I took a deep breath.

“On the surface I may seem strong, but deep down... I’m not the same creature you think you knew. Too much has happened since those days. But you? You’ve got a kind heart. You led the changelings to freedom. No changeling deserves the title of King more then you.”

Thorax began to smile.

“That’s really nice of you. I don’t know if you’re right, but if that’s how you really feel... I’ll do my best to take care of the hive.”

I began to smile too.

“I’m sure you will.”

Thorax rushed me and pulled me into a hug.

“I’m so glad I got to see you...big brother.”

I returned the hug.

“It was good meeting you too Thorax.”

We pulled apart and I stepped back next to Rarity. She was beaming. She leaned over and whispered.

“I’m so proud of you.”

Twilight seemed to finally be up to speed and stepped forward.

“I’m glad you two were able to meet. I didn’t expect...all of that, but I’m glad.”

Thorax nodded.

“I’m going to head back out to the gathering.”

He looked at me.

“Will I see you out there?”

I nodded.

“In a minute. I think I need to talk to Twilight first.”

Thorax nodded again and left the room. I turned to Twilight.

“Any questions?”

She burst.

“Where do I even begin?! You’re a child of Chrysalis? All of the changelings are?! You’re basically royalty? How could you not have told us?!”

I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yes, most of them, not really, and it’s something I wasn't very comfortable sharing. Well...except with Rarity.”

Twilight looked at Rarity.

“You knew?!”

Rarity smiled.

“Of course I knew dear. You tend to learn a few things about each other in a relationship.”

Twilight looked back at me.

“Does Celestia know?”

I shook my head.

“No. But now that the changelings are becoming allies, the truth won’t remain silent for long. I’ll tell her and Luna the next time I’m in Canterlot.”

“Not even Celestia knew?! Rarity knew before Celestia?!”

I rolled my eyes.

“Well I’m not sleeping with Celestia.”

That made both Twilight and Rarity turn crimson.

The Love and Pain of Family

I sat in Celestia’s study, waiting for her and Luna’s reaction. They both sat across from me in silence.

After several seconds, Celestia spoke first.

“I can’t say I’m too surprised. I felt like there was something you hadn’t told us. But out of respect I didn’t pry.”

Luna nodded.

“I think I speak for both of us when I say we’re grateful for you telling us about your lineage.”

I let out a sigh of relief.

“I’m sorry I never told you.”

Celestia smiled.

“It’s alright Shade. We’re just happy you feel comfortable enough to tell us.”

Luna leaned over and whispered something to Celestia. Her smile got bigger and she nodded.

“I think you’re right Luna.”

She focused back on me.

“We think it’s only right to continue this openness. Is there anything you’ve wanted to ask us?”

My ears perked up. It had been so long since I’d thought about the topic! Suddenly all of my old questions flooded back. But I didn’t want to overwhelm them.

I narrowed it all down to one request.

“Tell me about your childhood. And becoming the Princesses.”

Celestia and Luna looked at each other and smiled. Luna was the first to speak.

“You understand that what we tell you is between us?”

I nodded vigorously.

“Of course! You two are family to me. I would never betray your trust.”

That made them both smile. Luna nudged Celestia.

“I told you he was like the little brother we always wanted.”

Celestia giggled.

“Well baby brother, let’s start from the beginning.”

I settled into my seat, ready for a story. Celestia began.

”We grew up in one of the few villages that existed in the land prior to the founding of Equestria. This was also the village that Gusty the Great lived in.”

I nodded, remembering she'd once told me about that fact.

”You mentioned her before. Had she already perfected the ascension spell by then?”

Celestial nodded.

”Gusty had spent her younger years in the pursuit. She feared more than anything that Grogar would somehow return. And she wasn't sure if anyone would be up for the task.”

Made a certain amount of sense. Celestial continued.

”So she created the spell. It gave a boost to her power and prolonged her life. What she hadn't planned on were the wings she grew.”

I shook my head.

”Wait. Wings are...a side-effect?”

Celestial nodded.

”As odd as that sounds yes. The spell has been tweaked since then as to incorporate them in a more official capacity.”

“Got it.”

“So that was the creation of the first alicorn. She lived in our village for the rest of her life. She passed after we took the thrones.”

“So she passed the spell and knowledge on to you.”

Luna nodded.

“Once she knew Equestria was in safe hooves, she decided she wasn’t needed anymore.”

I shuffled my hooves.

“I wasn’t aware alicorns could die honestly. I mean...you’ve both been alive so long I just figured...”

Celestia sighed.

“As much as everypony hopes that, we’re not immortal. The truth of the matter is that...”

She looked at Luna and they both nodded. Celestia turned back to me and continued.

“We control the flow of time within ourselves.”

I blinked several times.

“You mean...it’s a spell?!”

Celestia slowly nodded. I stammered first a few seconds before composing myself.

“I thought you said the ascension spell prolonged your life.”

“The ascension spell is actually two parts. One part increases your power. The other part prolongs life. That part has to be constantly maintained. But with the extreme power boost, it doesn’t drain you at all. If an average pony tried to use the spell they’d most likely drain their magic reserve within a few minutes.”

Luna locked eyes with me.

“Shade, you have to understand. This is one of the greatest secrets of Equestria. There are only a hoof-ful of living ponies who have ever had this knowledge.”

I collected my thoughts and spoke slowly.

“I’m not surprised. I assume every alicorn knows the spell?”

Celestia winced.

“I...haven’t told Twilight yet.”

My brow arched and Celestia sighed.

“We’ll tell her when the time is right, but it’s a terrible burden to put on a pony.”

I nodded in understanding. It made sense. Twilight would be faced with the same dilemma I’d struggled with.

“Cadance knows?”

Luna nodded.

“She does. And she’s opted not to prolong her life.”

My eyes bulged.

“Seriously?!”

Celestia nodded.

“She’s expressed her desire to not subject Shining Armor to that decision. And now that they have Flurry Heart they have a successor to protect the Empire.”

I allowed the information to sink in. That was a brave decision on her part.

”So you two grew up in the same village as Gusty.”

Celestia nodded.

“We were still young when Equestria was founded. But they realized quickly they needed a more unified leadership.”

Luna chimed in.

“That’s when Star Swirl showed up.”

Celestia chuckled.

“Yes. He was an eccentric stallion, to say the least. But the kingdoms trusted his opinion above most. So he was tasked with finding those who could lead.”

I was nearing the edge of my seat.

“And that’s when he found you?”

She shook her head.

“He came to meet Gusty actually. But when she turned down his offer, she suggested us. Once Star Swirl made his decision, Gusty took us aside and passed on her knowledge and the ascension spell. She told us we’d need to be strong for any enemies we might face.”

I nodded as I took in all this information.

“Did Star Swirl know about the process as well?”

“He was the one pony Gusty trusted to hold the information until we were old enough to use them ourselves.”

“I can only imagine that ponies were shocked to be introduced to an entirely new race.”

Luna chimed in.

“They were! But none of them could know it was possible to be like us. Star Swirl knew that nopony could ever know about the ascension. That sort of power can’t be given to just anypony. So we kept it secret for centuries.”

“So you were crowned rulers of Equestria and began your reign.”

They both nodded. I sat back in my seat.

“That tells me more about alicorns, but what were you two like back then?”

Celestia smiled.

“Honestly? We were brats.”

Luna nudged her.

“We tried to act like we were regal, but that only went so far. We were still fillies at heart.”

“And before your ascension?”

Celestia took over.

“Everypony in our village studied magic, weather, and agriculture. We thought it best to be well rounded when it came to the three races. But, as Luna mentioned, we especially excelled in magic.”

Luna giggled.

“We went around casting spells constantly. I’m sure the adults were happy when we finally left.”

That’s when it occurred to me.

“What about your parents?”

That made both of their smiles fade. They looked at each other for several seconds. Celestia finally sighed.

“All we know is that they were respected members of the community.”

“You mean they were-“

I couldn’t bring myself to finish the sentence. I didn’t want them to have to relive old memories.

A tear rolled down Celestia’s cheek

“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve tried to remember anything about them. But...the memories just aren’t there. A curse for living so long I suppose.”

Luna pulled her sister closer as Celestia wiped away tears. Luna looked to me as she stroked her sister’s mane.

“Father died before I was born. Mother shortly after we took the thrones. It was so long ago..”

I stood up and approached them. I embraced both sisters.

“I’m so sorry. If anypony can understand that emptiness I can. Even with Chrysalis alive, I felt alone and scared for so long...”

Their collective grip tightened around me for a few seconds before they released me. We all wiped tears away before I said anything.

“You two went through such a drastic change. How did you cope with being leaders at such a young age?”

A grin grew on Luna’s face.

“We didn’t. We still acted like fillies constantly.”

Celestia chuckled.

“Star Swirl didn’t realize what he’d signed up for taking us under his wing.”

Luna began laughing.

“Remember that week we kept hiding his hat?”

Celestia began laughing too.

“I’d nearly forgotten!”

They collapsed in a fit of laughter. I couldn’t help but smile at these sisters. No. My sisters.

They got under my skin regularly. And they were more immature than they let the public know. But they were the siblings I’d always wished I could have. And I thanked whatever deities were out there that they were mine. They were my family.

As we settled into our routines, I saw an unfortunate change over the months. It was easy to see that Luna was feeling a strain from her duties. I could only assume there were a lot of rough nights. It appeared Celestia was feeling stretched thin as well. Even with me helping she was dealing with an influx of work. And Luna’s attitude toward her didn't help matters. I should have spoken up sooner, but my own schedule between Canterlot and Ponyville kept me occupied.

I finally mentioned Luna to Celestia one day.

”She gets like that sometimes. She'll spring back before long.”

”Uh-huh...and how is it living in the State of Denial? Sunny weather?”

”Don't worry Shade. She'll be fine.”

She pulled out a scroll and passed it to me.

”On a more serious note, I got this from Cadance today.”

I opened the scroll and began reading.

Dear Celestia,

While everyone here is doing well, I fear there may be trouble ahoof. Shining Armor has discovered signs of strange magic near the borders of the kingdom. I can only imagine what that could mean for us.

I know that you have a pony in your employ that is considered to be quite knowledgeable on most subjects and a quick read. I was wondering if we could borrow them to see if they might help us figure out what we're dealing with here in the Empire.

Your niece,
Cadance

I looked up from the scroll.

“She wants me?”

Celestia nodded.

“Your reputation has reached the Crystal Empire.”

“Does she know anything about me?”

“No. I think that’s best left for you to decide. Tell her as much or as little as you feel necessary. Remember that she’s different now. Thorax changed her perception of changelings for the better.”

I nodded. That was true. It would be interesting to see what happened.

A sigh escaped me.

“I can’t imagine this will be a quick trip. I’d better get in touch with Rarity.”

“Take the train back today. You’ll probably need a day to prepare for the journey anyway. And leave for the Empire the day after tomorrow.”

My brow arched.

“That much of a delay? It sounds like they could use me immediately.”

Celestia grinned. It was an impish grin too.

“Do you really want to go away without spending one or two more nights at home? You don’t know how long you’ll be gone after all.”

I got the drift and couldn’t help but smile.

“Fair point.”

————————

I hopped off the train and nearly ran into Starlight. I skidded to a halt.

“Sorry Starlight! I didn’t see you there!”

She brushed some dust out of her mane and smiled.

“It’s alright. I didn’t know you’d be in town today!”

“Change of plans for me actually. I’m heading towards the Crystal Empire in a couple days.”

“Oh wow! What for?”

“Not entirely sure. But Cadance requested me.”

“You’ll probably meet my friend Sunburst! He’s Flurry Heart’s crystaler.”

“I look forward to meeting him. Where are you off to?”

“Canterlot. I’m actually heading for the castle.”

That caught me off guard.

“Why?”

She seemed a little hesitant.

“Well...the map...called me there.”

It took a second for my mind to click. Once I realized what was happening I groaned.

“Dammit.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Just...good luck Starlight.”

She narrowed her eyes.

“You know something.”

“Just...tread lightly. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

That didn’t seem to comfort her at all.

“I’d...better get on the train then. Good luck in the Empire.”

“Thanks.”

I trotted towards town. I didn’t envy that mare one bit. If the map had deemed it enough of a problem, I only had myself to blame. Why couldn’t I have made more time for the two of them?

I shook my head. No time for sulking about the past. I had preparations to make and a special somepony to see.

As I passed buildings I made mental notes of where I needed to get supplies. From what I'd heard I was going someplace cold.

The boutique came into view before long and my pace quickened. I opened the door, a smile forming as I spotted Rarity.

She didn't see me yet, but she knew somepony had walked in.

”Be with you in just a moment! This hemline is being particularly stubborn.”

I chuckled.

”Sounds a little like a mare I know.”

Her ears perked up and she spun around.

”Shade! What are you doing back so soon?”

I raced over to her and gave her a kiss. She sighed as our lips pressed together. When I pulled away she seemed a bit frazzled.

”Well! That only answers half of my question.”

I sighed.

” It's good and bad news.”

That got her attention.

”What's wrong?”

”Nothing! But...Cadance has requested me to help with a problem in the Crystal Empire.”

”Really? I'm surprised she didn't ask for Twilight!”

”Apparently she needs my particular skills.”

”Well that's wonderful! Isn't it?”

I nodded.

”It's a great opportunity, but...”

Rarity's eyes dimmed a little as she connected the dots.

”You don't know how long you'll be gone for.”

I nodded.

”I wish I knew what I was walking into, but it could be really extensive. Or it could be really easy and I'll be back in a couple of days.”

She shook her head.

”You don't believe that, do you?”

I shook my head.

”No. But it was suggested to me that I shouldn't leave without saying a proper goodbye to you.”

Rarity giggled.

”Celestia is giving you advice about your...’personal’ time?”

”You have no idea how nosy those two are when it comes to this subject.”

She pulled me in for another kiss. I couldn't help but smile as she pulled away. She returned the smile.

”Well I'll help you follow her advice. We may have to follow it repeatedly.”

My entire body felt like jelly at that moment. Rarity was moving closer. She was an inch from my face when her eyes narrowed with frustration.

”As soon as I get that hemline down!”

She left me standing there in the middle of the room, confused as to what had just happened.

————————

I laid down in bed, completely exhausted. Not only had I been up half the night with Rarity, but I’d spent the whole next day running from store to store to gather supplies for my assignment. Now that the evening had come, I was ready for some sleep. When Rarity had seen how tired I was, she’d put on a pouty face.

“I thought you’d still have some energy to work off.”

It pained me to say ‘no’, but my body was aching too much. I settled in for an early night’s sleep.

I felt myself drift off. For a few moments, I was in the black abyss. Before I knew it though, I was thrown into Luna’s meadow. Literally.

“Ouch! What’s the idea, Luna?”

I looked around the meadow. No Luna. Where was she? My eyes drifted to the sky. Plenty of stars twinkling. In fact, more than usual. Then I saw something...different. One star looked as if it were bouncing between the others. Rather ungracefully too. Stars were going out, but the pattern was random. Luna usually had a certain flow to her work.

And then the bouncing star came crashing down with a scream. I felt something squish me into the grass. What was on top of me?!

“Ooohhh...shit! How does Luna do this every night?!”

I turned my head so my mouth wasn’t eating dream-grass.

“Celestia?!”

I glanced out of the corner of my eye to discover that Celestia’s rear end was sitting on my head. And not only that but-

“Is that Luna’s cutie mark?!”

Celestia jumped up.

“Shade! Did I crash into your dream? I’m so sorry!”

I got off the ground, taking a deep breath.

“What are you doing?!”

“Well...it wasn’t my idea!”

I rolled my eyes.

“I have a pretty educated guess in that department. And I don’t know what Starlight has planned for the two of you, but leave me out of it. You’re her problem for now.”

“Well, somepony is a grumpy sleeper.”

I glared at her.

“You’d be grumpy too if you’d just been face-planted to the ground by an ass!”

She frowned and rubbed her rear.

“You should have gotten out of the way. It’s sore now.”

“Out of the way?! You fell into this meadow as fast as I fell into Everfree!!”

Her frown grew sterner.

“Well, it’s not my fault! Starlight swapped our cutie marks and now we have to do each other’s job!”

I put my face in my hooves.

“I told her to tread lightly...”

Celestia gasped.

“What did you say to her?!”

“Nothing! I told her good luck and to be careful. You know why? Because as soon as she said she was heading to the castle I knew who the map was sending her to!”

She scoffed at me.

“Oh don’t scold me like I’m a filly.”

I sighed and sat down.

“I tried to tell you Celestia. I guess my warning came too late though.”

She stood there silently for a minute, looking down and kicking the dream-grass. She finally looked up, her voice a whisper.

“I’m sorry.”

I perked my ears up.

“Hmm?”

“I’m sorry. I should have listened to you.”

I nodded.

“I’m sorry too. I should have spoken up sooner. Maybe it wouldn’t have gotten to these extremes.”

I looked up at the stars. A lot of them were twinkling.

“It’s a lively night. You’d better get back up there.”

She looked up at the sky and sighed.

“How does she do it all?”

I chuckled.

“With a lot more grace. You were bouncing around up there like a pinball on a sugar high.”

She glared at me, with a smile, spreading her wings for takeoff.

“Good luck in the Empire Shade.”

She took off into the air as the meadow melted away. I waved to her as she disappeared into the dreamscape.

I prayed that Starlight's methods would help those two.

And whatever laid ahead of me in the Empire, I prayed that I'd be able to help half as much.

The Crystal Empire

I watched in astonishment as the train went from being in a blizzard to being in the sun instantly. I'd never seen such powerful magic before!

The train slowed down as it approached the station. I looked out the window and spotted Shining Armor standing on the platform.

It was at that moment I began feeling nervous. What should I tell them? How would they react? What if they hated me?

I shook my head. I had to stop thinking so negatively.

I stepped off the train, feeling the warmth of the Sun. A sigh left me as I basked in the light.

”You must be the Right Hoof.”

I glanced over to see Shining Armor approaching. I smiled at him.

”Call me Shade. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you Shining Armor.”

I held out my hoof and he shook it.

“Shade.”

I felt his eyes wander over me, trying to figure me out. I cleared my throat, bringing his attention back.

“Sorry. You just...don't look like a pony really. But you don’t put off the aura I thought you might.”

I smiled.

“Maybe I can explain once we get to the palace. It’s a story both you and Cadance should hear.”

He stared at me for a moment before nodding.

“Okay. Follow me.”

We walked into the city and I was instantly overwhelmed. There was so much to look at. Everything was made of crystal! I’d never known there were this many colors in the world!

“It’s all so beautiful! I’d heard some stories, but this place puts them to shame!”

Shining Armor smiled.

“Yeah. It’s pretty different from the rest of Equestria. I’m sure the palace is going to be quite a change from the castle in Canterlot.”

My eyes found the palace ahead of us and my head tipped backward to see the top.

“Woah...”

“Yeah. That’s what I said the first time too.”

We reached the steps and climbed to the entrance. I was overwhelmed once again at the beauty of the interior as Shining Armor opened the door.

“Sweet Celestia!”

Shining Armor chuckled.

“You don’t get out much, do you?”

“From what I’ve heard he stays pretty busy.”

We both turned to find the owner of the voice. Cadance was standing off to one side of the main hall.

She was very much like I remembered. I found myself overwhelmed once again as I felt the wave of love coming off of her. A shiver ran through my body and I audibly gasped.

Cadance looked concerned.

“Are you alright?”

I shook myself from head to toe. I could feel goosebumps all over my body.

“Sorry. It’s just...well...it’s a long story.”

Shining Armor walked over to his wife.

“A story he thinks we should both hear apparently.”

I looked around.

“Is there somewhere more private we can go?”

Cadance nodded.

“I need to check on Flurry Heart. We can all go to the nursery.”

They led the way to the nursery. We didn’t say anything to each other until Cadance opened the door to the room.

“This is Flurry Heart.”

I spotted the foal at once. She was adorable!

She began giggling at the sight of her parents. We all stepped inside and shut the door.

Cadance picked Flurry up.

“Hello sweetie! Have you been good today?”

More giggles. Cadance looked at me.

“Do you want to start with your name? And why you look similar to a changeling?”

I sat down and sighed.

“My name is Shade. I look similar to a changeling because I used to be one. I had a run-in with Discord several months ago and he changed me into a pony.”

If she was fazed by that response, she hid it well.

“Several months ago?”

I nodded. Cadance seemed disturbed. I didn’t have to wait to find out why.

“As I’ve heard, the Right Hoof has been working with my aunts for almost two years.”

“That’s correct.”

“So you’re saying Celestia and Luna employed a changeling long before we ever met Thorax.”

Now I understood.

“The circumstances that led me to Celestia and Luna are very different than what led Thorax up here. Shall I start from the beginning?”

Cadance nodded.

“Please.”

I took a deep breath.

“I’m sure you can guess that I was involved in the Invasion of Canterlot?”

Shining Armor nodded.

“I’d guessed as much.”

“Well...I wasn’t just a foot soldier. I was the one Chrysalis sent to spy on Canterlot. I was to find weak points in the defenses and report back with a possible strategy.”

They both stared at me, no questions. I took a breath and continued.

“I was having trouble finding any holes in the defenses. I'm sure that was due to your expertise, Shining Armor. But just when I thought I'd failed, something happened. I felt a source of love. The largest I’ve ever felt in my life.”

I pointed to Cadance.

“Coming from you. Aimed at him.”

My hoof moved from her to Shining Armor.

“And that’s when I came up with a plan that, in theory, could have toppled the entire leadership of Equestria.”

Cadance arched her brow.

“You planned the invasion?”

I slowly nodded. Shining Armor took a step forward.

“It’s because of you?”

I nodded again.

“I spent the next few days gathering all the information I could on the two of you. Especially Cadance. Once I was done, I went back to Chrysalis.”

Cadance kept staring at me for several seconds. I felt Shining Armor’s gaze as well. All I could do was clear my throat.

“Do you mind if I ask the two of you a question?”

That seemed to snap them out of silence. Cadance took a breath.

“Sure.”

“I was pretty close to you guys during those days and I never once heard you mention Twilight. And from everything I’ve heard since, she’s a big part of both your lives. So how did I miss that?”

They looked at each other for a moment. Shining Armor took the lead.

“Honestly? We only mentioned her once. Right after we got engaged in fact. We both knew she was going to be the Mare of Honor. So...we never really bothered after that.”

I let out something that sounded like a half-chuckle.

“So I didn’t mess up..”

I shook my head and focused back on Cadance.

“Well, you know how the rest went. My story really begins when you launched the changelings out of Canterlot.”

A small smile formed on Cadance’s lips.

“Go on.”

———————

Flurry Heart had gone down for a nap by the time I finished. I sat back and waited for their reactions.

Shining Armor was the first to speak.

“That’s quite the story. If we didn’t have Celestia’s word on you, I’d be skeptical. No offense.”

I smiled.

“None taken.”

Cadance chimed in.

“You’ve been through a lot. I can’t say I’m happy that I wasn’t told about you sooner, but I understand why Celestia would withhold that information. We only recently realized changelings were capable of more than evil. It’s still hard to believe sometimes.”

“I don’t blame you honestly. But if I can tell you from my perspective, changelings are more docile by nature than you think. It was only under Chrysalis that we had to act like that. It was either help our Queen or die a traitor.”

Cadance nodded.

“I’m not surprised. She seems to have no limits to her cruelty.”

Flurry Heart squirmed in her crib. Cadance glanced at her foal and smiled.

“She’s dreaming. Why don’t we move our conversation to another room? I think it’s time we told you why you’re here.”

I nodded and let them lead the way out of the room.

As we walked down the hall, Cadance turned to me.

“There’s one thing I’m still wondering about. Why did you shiver when you saw me? Were you afraid of how I’d react?”

I chuckled.

“Not at all Princess. I may be a pony, but I still retain my old abilities. Including feeling the energy love puts off.”

“The energy?”

“It’s similar to the aura of magic. But only changelings, as far as I know, can feel it. And you put off an energy that could feed thousands for a lifetime. I’ve never known a pony to have such a capacity for love.”

She giggled.

“Well, I am the Princess of Love. And if you’d like to know, I can feel some of that energy too.”

“Really?”

“Maybe not as much as a changeling, but I can get a pretty good sense of a pony. Like how you have a great capacity for love.”

I couldn’t hide my surprise. That made her giggle more.

“You have love for your friends, your adoptive family, and...”

Her eyes lit up.

“You even have a special somepony!”

“That’s an amazing talent!”

“Who is it?”

“Who’s what?”

“Your special somepony of course!”

I looked to Shining Armor for help. He smiled and shook his head.

“Trust me. It’s easier to answer.”

I looked back at Cadance.

“I assume you know Rarity?”

She smiled.

“Of course I know Rarity! How long have you two been together?”

“Quite a while now actually.”

“That’s wonderful! That honestly gives me even more relief regarding you.”

“Oh?”

“She’s an excellent judge of character. You must be quite the gentleman to have won her heart.”

I blushed.

“Well...I don’t know about that.”

She giggled again.

“From what I’ve learned of changelings since meeting Thorax, it seems their very love-centric in most things. I can only imagine that you’re a very caring partner.”

“I’d never thought about that.”

Shining Armor nudged me.

“So where do you two get together for dates? You know, since you live in different places.“

I smiled.

“It’s about half and half. She comes to check up on her shop in the city and I work with Twilight half the time so we’re never away from each other too long.”

“That’s pretty lucky. I had to steal whatever moments I could with Cadance. Being Captain of the Guard took most of my time. And she was always off with delegations and committees.“

I couldn’t help but smile.

“I imagine the two of you disappeared when in the same room?”

Shining turned red and grinned.

“Well...”

Cadance was laughing now.

“You’re very forward, aren’t you?“

I chuckled.

“I’m not good with subtlety. That’s the changeling in me.”

She reigned her laughter in.

“To answer your question, I was always pulling him away from his duties when I was in Canterlot. There are plenty of dark corners and unused rooms if you know where to look in the castle.”

She winked and I found myself laughing.

“I might need to ask you for some of those locations. I can’t have Rarity around without Celestia and Luna getting in my way.”

That got her laughing again.

“You can try, but I’m pretty sure they know them all now. We were nearly caught constantly!”

I glanced at Shining Armor again and he was still red with embarrassment.

Cadance and I kept laughing as we approached a door at the end of the hallway.

I realized that we had been walking for a bit.

“Does nopony come down this way often?”

Cadance’s smile disappeared.

“No. And for good reason.”

She opened the door to reveal an empty room. Well...nearly empty.

There was a table with a chest on it. The chest had chains and several locks wrapped around it.

As I stepped into the room, I felt a force like I hadn’t felt in some time. It was...malevolent. Not unlike Chrysalis, but somehow...worse.

I stopped and swallowed.

“What’s in there? I feel...sick.”

I looked at Cadance. I could see she was feeling the effects too, but was handling it better. She took a deep breath and replied.

“That’s why we asked for you. I think Shining and I are the only ponies who can really stand in here for an extended period. That’s why we put it in the unused wing of the palace. It keeps it away from the curious.”

I straightened up.

“I can handle it. Show me.”

Cadance nodded and approached the chest. I followed and waited as she unlocked the chains. When the last chain fell away, she opened the chest.

The aura only got stronger as the contents were exposed to the air. I had to keep myself from heaving.

I slowly glanced into the chest. What could put off such a horrible feeling?

What I saw only made me feel worse.

It was a crystal, no bigger than a wood splinter. And yet the pure malice coming from it made me want to run away.

And if the minuscule size wasn’t enough to make me scared, the color was doing a good job as well. In this beautiful palace, with every color in existence reflected in the crystals, this splinter was a shade of black that threatened to swallow anything that came near it.

I slowly stepped back and Cadance shut the chest. She locked the chains in place and we all exited the room. As soon as the door shut behind us, I fell to the ground. My entire body was shivering out of fear.

“What. Was. That?”

Cadance and Shining Armor looked at each other for a few seconds before looking back at me. Shining Armor pulled me up off the floor.

“There’s only one pony we’ve ever encountered that has magic like that. And he’s supposed to be dead.”

I felt my blood go cold. Twilight had told me about him and what he was capable of. She had been terrified by the power she’d wrestled with.

What shook me to my core was that the splinter was proof that whatever Twilight had dealt with wasn’t anywhere near the limits of King Sombra. And we were all in trouble.

The Room

The first thing I needed was information. Cadance was more than happy to show me the Empire’s library.

I gawked are the sheer number of books housed within the walls. It had to be double the amount of Canterlot’s library!

“This could take some time.”

“I understand. I can’t reasonably ask you to look through every book-“

“On the contrary. That’s the only way I’m going to be able to get the full picture. I need to have every piece of information in regards to this kingdom, it’s magic, and most importantly anything you have about...him.”

We hadn’t dared to speak his name. We didn’t want to cause a panic. But it also felt like bad luck honestly. Saying Sombra’s name somehow breathed new life into him. I didn’t want that and neither did Cadance or Shining Armor.

Cadance escorted me to a private room.

“This can be your study so that you have easy access to whatever you need. Every book is right in this main hall. But books on...the last subject have all been locked away.”

She held up a key.

“You must promise me that you won’t lose this key or any of the books you find.”

I nodded as I accepted the key.

“You have my word.”

She nodded and turned to leave.

“I’ll let you get to work. But if you have any questions, I’ve asked for an assistant to join you. He should be here soon.”

“I’ll keep an eye out. And I’ll let you know if I find anything.”

Cadance left the room and I took a deep breath.

“Sorry Rarity. It looks like I’ll be gone more than a few days.”

A knock at the door startled me.

“Uh...come in?”

The door swung inward to reveal a stallion in a robe. He had disheveled hair and a crooked pair of glasses.

“My apologies for being late. I came as soon as Princess Cadance called for me.”

He held out a hoof.

“Sunburst, at your service.”

I smiled and shook his hoof.

“So you’re Sunburst! Starlight mentioned you before I came up north.”

He seemed surprised.

“You know Starlight?”

“Of course! I consider her a good friend.”

“Huh. I didn’t know she knew the Right Hoof.”

“Either way it’s nice to meet you. You can call me Shade.”

“Shade. It’s nice to meet you.”

I think he finally registered my appearance, because he began blinking more.

“Uh...not to be rude...”

I smiled.

“Short version; I’m a former changeling. But that’s the least of our worries right now.”

Sunburst’s eyes lit up.

“Right! I’m sorry. We have much more urgent matters at hoof. How can I help?”

I walked out of the room into the main hall of the library.

“I’ll need every book regarding the history of the Empire. Also any pertaining to crystals. And I mean every book. Even if it fills that room.”

Sunburst nodded.

“I can handle that.”

“Good. I’m going to go take a look at these restricted books Cadance mentioned.”

Sunburst looked visibly disturbed.

“A word of caution Shade. There’s a reason those were locked away.”

I arched my brow.

“You’ve read them?”

He shook his head.

“I’ve never even seen them. I asked once, but Cadance said they should never see the light of day.”

“Are they that bad?”

He began walking toward the nearest shelf.

“That’s as much as I know I’m afraid. Bottom floor. Last door on the right.”

He disappeared into the stacks and I took a deep breath.

“Well that’s not concerning at all.”

I turned to the stairs and began to descend. Bottom floor? Surely there wasn’t more than one floor below?

I got to the bottom and looked around. It looked like a hall of records. It seemed the library had more to it than I knew. I began walking along the main aisle. About halfway down I discovered a smaller set of stairs going down.

“Okay then.”

I descended the stairs and found myself in a hall of doors. I began walking along, keeping an eye out for more stairs. The doors were labeled for various things; older records, supplies, furniture, etc. I came to the end of the hall and found the last door on the right. It looked older than the others. And there was a single symbol on the door. It was Old Ponish.

“Danger. That’s just great.”

I put the key in the door and turned it. The sound of rusty lock pins scratched against my eardrums. I pulled the door open and-

“Oh come on!!”

My shout echoed through the hall. It was more stairs, descending into darkness.

“Fine. Let’s just get this over with.”

I summoned a ball of light and sent it ahead of me by a few paces. I began descending what was hopefully the final flight. The staircase curved in a downward spiral. Just how deep was I going? The light had drifted further ahead, always just out of sight. As I continued my trip down, it came into view suddenly. It had stopped in front of an ancient door. This door had Old Ponish inscribed on it too.

“Do not release this evil.”

Cadance has said they were books....right?

I looked down at the door handle. This one didn’t have a lock. Why did that scare me more?

“Because nopony would be stupid enough to open this.”

I took a deep breath and pushed against the door. It swung inward and was consumed by the darkness. I sent my light orb ahead. It could barely illuminate anything. I began summoning more until I had a dozen orbs floating in the room. It still wasn’t fully lit, but it was enough to see the dusty contents. The room was small. There was a desk and chair, both unused for centuries I’d imagine. Opposite them was a bookshelf. It contained two books.

“Only two?”

I looked around the room. The only other item inside was a stand with a candle. I sent a spark to the candle and it erupted.

I fell to the floor as the candle settled, it’s flame casting an eerie glow on the room. Somehow this old candle was producing more light than my orbs were. I extinguished them without a thought. The room was cast in a red light from the candle’s flame. It felt unnatural. A shiver ran down my spine.

“Okay. Just grab the books and go.”

I turned towards the bookshelf. As I did, I caught the door in the corner of my eye.

Do not release this evil.

That gave me pause. Was it wise to take these books out of here? Surely they weren’t...

I locked my eyes on the books. One looked like an average book. The other one looked...odd. It’s cover seemed to have somehow mutated with age. I’d never seen that happen to a book before.

“We’ll start with the more normal one.”

I levitated the book over to the desk, a cloud of dust rising as I set it down. I cracked open the cover, curious to see the contents. I found myself reading the words aloud as they came into view.

“An Account of the Dark Times, By Emerald Dawn.”

It was a journal! An actual hoofwritten account of Sombra’s reign! I didn’t even think. I began reading.

I got through five pages before everything properly connected in my brain. As soon as I processed what I’d read, I dropped the book and vomited on the floor. My whole body shook from the shock. I looked at the book, horrified that the first few pages could contain such heinous detail. How could I keep reading?

I found myself thinking of all the ponies above. Cadance, Shining Armor, Flurry Heart... I had to keep going for them. For everypony. I got to my feet and approached the book again. I paced myself so that I didn’t have another spewing episode.

Pacing didn’t help much...

I threw up three more times as I read the journal. The only reason I stopped finally was because the journal abruptly ended. I could imagine why that was. I sat in silence for several minutes, letting everything wash over me. I knew more than I wanted to know. I felt weak and ill. Could I really look at another book like that?

I looked back at the shelf, summoning the other book. I set it down in front of me. I’d never seen a book like it. The leather was a sickly shade of green almost. I didn’t dare touch it honestly. I opened the cover with my horn and stared at the first page.

That’s when I felt the temperature drop. And I felt an unwelcome, familiar aura of magic. My breathing became rapid as I realized that Sombra had made this book. My eyes followed the first few lines of text. The words looked red in the candlelight.

I am the Lord of Shadows. All who oppose me will fall to darkness. And those who don’t, will submit to me.

The candlelight flickered as though a breeze had passed through. I took a deep breath and turned the page.

The pages contained a combination of spells and journal entries. The spells were sadistic creations for his own devices. The journal entries showed his madness. Every word only proved just how evil he’d been. He tortured, enslaved, and ended countless lives all in the pursuit of power. And he didn’t give any of it a second thought. It was his nature. And it was plain to see he enjoyed every drop of blood he spilt.

Too easily I was reminded of Chrysalis for the shear cruelty behind these actions. But even Chrysalis hadn't done the things this monster had. How could he justify these heinous acts? Every other page talked about his hunt for infinite power and prolonging his life. What was the end goal though?

Every page made my stomach turn. I would have been sick again if I had had anything left in my stomach. So instead my stomach clenched up tight and my head began to pound with the imagery that I was forcing into it. I arrived at the last page and froze. Only my eyes moved as they followed the last line.

My reign shall never end. The flesh and blood of all who challenge me will continue to be proof of my power, just as this tome is.

I felt my body begin to tremble. I summoned a light orb directly over the book. The writing was red. The dark red shade of blood. As I slowly moved my hoof away from the page, I brushed against the rough stitching of the leather. It scratched against me and sent a shiver down my spine.

I jumped from the chair and backed away. I used my magic to close the book, determined to put it out of my mind. That’s when I saw the cover more clearly. The orb highlighted the mangled surface. I couldn’t look away as my eyes contemplated what I was seeing.

And then I began to scream. I hadn’t screamed this loud since Everfree. Since being torn to shreds by the timberwolves. And yet somehow, this was worse.

My mind was filled with the memories of the dead. I would forever be haunted by what I’d read. But nothing would haunt me more than the sight of Sombra’s tome; the book wrapped in skin.

A Single Clue

I emerged from the last stairway, finally in the daylight.

And I was welcomed by a concerned Cadance.

“Shade! Sunburst came looking for me when you’d been gone so long. Have you been-“

She stopped as she registered my appearance.

“Why do you have soot all over you?”

I couldn’t find the words. I just stood there, trembling.

“Shade? What happened down there?”

I didn’t want to speak, but I forced myself. I wasn’t sure what would come out, but I had to try.

“D-d-d-did you......know?”

Her eyes grew more concerned.

“Know what?”

“D-did you k-know? Did you see them?”

She inhaled sharply, covering her mouth.

“You...did you...you didn’t...”

My voice grew stronger.

“Did you ever look at them?”

She shook her head.

“Only from the doorway. Nopony has ever actually entered that room. I didn't think you'd... Shade, why do you smell like smoke?”

I nodded as my gaze fell to the floor. Nopony else had ever seen or read them. That was good.

“Shade?”

I looked back at Cadance. She seemed to be reigning in her fear.

“What did you do?”

I felt the tears beginning to roll down my cheeks.

“I had to...”

Cadance stared at me in shock.

“Those were the only histories from that time. A time that shouldn’t be forgotten.”

I felt my anger boil to the surface.

“No. You’re wrong Princess. That time needs to be buried deep. Nopony needs to know what happened during that...monster’s reign! The words I’ve read will never leave me now. I am the only pony who will be cursed with this knowledge. I made sure of that.”

“No history should ever be hidden! You can’t decide what ponies should know and not know!”

“YES. I. CAN!!”

My voice echoed through the library.

“If you saw one sentence of what I read, you’d never be able to sleep again. I know things now that will give me nightmares for the rest of my life!”

She tried to speak, but I cut her off.

“If you think for one second I was going to let anypony else near those books, then you don’t know what you’re dealing with! If that creature-“

She slapped a hoof over my mouth and pulled me close. Her voice was barely above a whisper.

“Not here. If you finish that sentence, you’ll cause a panic that I won’t be able to control. The ponies in this kingdom are those that have been lucky enough to survive Sombra. Even if they don't remember what happened. And I will not have you undo this kingdom with your hysterics. Understood?!”

Muzzling me had allowed me to clear my head. I took a deep breath and nodded. Cadance lowered her hoof.

“Good.”

She took a deep breath of her own.

“If you truly felt that way about the books, you should have told me first. We could have discussed options-“

I leaned in close to her, whispering in her ear. It was barely audible. I didn’t want to say anything, but she needed to understand. But I refused to say too much.

So I told her only one detail.

I pulled away to see her face. She was in shock. Her rosy hue paled as the information set in.

After a few moments, she took a breath and asked a single question.

“You’re sure it was necessary?”

I nodded.

“I used the strongest fire magic possible. The contents of that room are nothing but ash now.”

She nodded, still pale as a sheet.

“Okay. I’ll trust you did the right thing Shade.”

Her color began to slowly return.

“But you’re not to destroy anything else tied to him unless I agree.”

I mulled it over but realized that it would be in my best interest to concede. I gave a slow nod and sighed.

“I’m going back to work.”

She seemed surprised.

“Surely you need a break?”

I shook my head.

“I need to know everything. And I need something to keep me distracted. I don’t want to think about what may come to mind if I’m left bored.”

Without another word, I turned and left. I didn’t mean to be rude, but I needed to hurry and start reading something else. Anything else.

I entered my temporary study to find stacks of books everywhere. There was just enough room for me to sit in the middle. Sunburst waved from the small patch of floor.

“I’m so happy you’re okay! I- Why do you smell like a fire?”

“I don’t have time Sunburst. You got everything I asked for?”

“Yes! And there’s more waiting in the next room when you’re ready for it!”

I nodded my approval and sat down.

“Could you leave me alone for a little? I just need a few minutes to get ready.”

He seemed hurt at getting kicked out. I faked a smile.

“Just a few minutes. I need to get in the right headspace.”

He smiled and nodded, leaving without a word.

Once the door shut behind him, I broke down. I let the tears come unhindered.

I couldn’t hold back the pain anymore. My mind was on fire. And my body wasn’t much better. I began brushing off the soot as gently as I could. It fell away to reveal the burns I’d endured from the fire. I’d lost control of the flames and suffered for it.

But at least those books were gone. I coughed out a short laugh. I couldn’t help but feel a sliver of happiness amongst my pain. Sombra’s memory would eventually fade from this world. And I had ensured that the worst of him would die with me.

I started to laugh, even as my tears proved that Sombra had taken one last victim.

———————

When Sunburst returned, he immediately showed concern over my burns.

I tried to fight him, but was forced to go to a doctor for some proper healing. That took up a few hours of my day that could have been devoted to research.

As soon as the doctor had finished with some bandages, I returned to the library. There was no time to waste.

I was already through several books when Sunburst walked in.

“Shouldn't you rest before jumping in like this?”

I closed the book in front of me and shook my head.

“If I plan on getting through all of these books I need to buckle down and read as fast as I can.”

I summoned the next book and began flipping the pages.

Sunburst sat in silent shock as he watched me flip through pages. I finished the book after a few minutes and moved to the next one. It wasn’t until a few books later that he found his voice.

“I’ve never seen anything like it! How can you retain all that information?”

I shrugged.

“I just can. I never questioned it.”

“Can any other changelings do that?”

“Not as far as I know. I imagine it’s some fluke.”

“Talent isn’t usually a fluke. Though some say your parentage can be an influence.”

That made me pause.

“You’re saying my parents could have passed something on?”

“That’s the idea. Do you know if either of them had this gift? Or something similar?”

I shook my head.

“Nothing as far as I know. Though I can’t be certain about my father. I never knew him.”

“And your mother?”

“Definitely not. She had no such talent. Magic ability yes, but nothing like what I can do. That’s the only reason she kept me around.”

“Well, that can’t be true. Parents love their kids.”

The next sentence he muttered.

“Some a little too much.”

I arched my brow and he chuckled.

“Sorry. Personal experience.”

“Uh-Huh... Well, my mother never actually loved me.”

“Why would you think that?”

I stared straight at him, a stern expression on my face.

“My mother is Chrysalis.”

Sunburst was shocked into silence again. I continued reading until he composed himself.

“That’s...interesting.”

“That’s one word for it.”

I could see him shuffle his hooves out of the corner of my eye. I closed the book in front of me and sighed.

“I can’t explain my existence Sunburst. Can anypony?”

He shook his head.

“I suppose not.”

He cleared his throat and approached me.

“Have you found anything yet?”

I groaned.

“All these histories tell similar stories. There’s really not enough variation. Were there not many historians?”

Sunburst looked down.

“As far as I know, there were very few. Most of them died before the kingdom vanished.”

I picked up the next book and paused. My eyes fixated on the title.

An Account of the Crystal Empire, by Emerald Dawn

I teared up again but was quick to wipe them away.

“Maybe this one will have what I’m looking for.”

Please, Emerald... Your other account was too detailed for my liking. Let this one be the same...

I cracked open the book and let out a sigh of relief. Details galore! I devoured the book in a few minutes and smiled.

“I think I may have something!”

“Really?”

“But I need more...”

Part of me wanted to keep reading, looking for more clues to support my hypothesis. Another part wondered if Shining Armor or Cadance might have the answers. And there was another thing...

I locked eyes with Sunburst.

“Where was that shard found?”

Sunburst gave a curt nod and turned to the door.

“Shining Armor knows. He can take us to the area.”

————————

Shining Armor took us to the northern edge of the Empire. For a few seconds I thought he was going to walk us out onto the frozen tundra. Luckily he stopped right at the border.

It was an odd sight. The grass was green and the flowers were blooming right in front of me. And a few hoofsteps further there was a snowstorm.

“The magic here is a bit bizarre.”

Sunburst nodded.

“The Crystal Heart is a strange magic item. We’re still trying to understand it’s capabilities.”

Shining Armor was looking around at the grass.

“It’s here somewhere...”

He brushed his hoof through the grass, his nose almost touching the ground.

“Aha!”

He stood up straight and pointed.

“This is the spot.”

I came closer and looked where his hoof was pointing. There was a spot where the grass was dead and brown. It was a little smaller than a bit.

“That’s where the shard was?”

Shining Armor nodded.

“It was growing out of the ground from that spot. I’m sure you can guess that we didn’t spot it easily. The only reason we found it was because of the energy it put off.”

I studied the spot. It was about two steps from the border. I looked out onto the tundra.

“Do you know what's out there?”

Sunburst shrugged.

“We don’t really know for sure. The land to the north is almost entirely unexplored.”

Shining Armor joined us in staring out into the snowy expanse.

“The tundra continues right up to the mountains. The only spot explored up there is Mount Everhoof.”

I sat down on the grass, confused.

“Nothing else?”

He looked at me.

“You think something’s out there?”

I nodded.

“I know something is out there.”

Sunburst straightened his glasses as he turned to me.

“What could possibly be out there?”

I looked between them for a moment before answering.

“The Empire has many natural crystals growing throughout it, but do you really think the buildings just sprouted out of the ground? Or the palace?”

That made them think. Sunburst was baffled.

“Well...I mean...”

Shining Armor was in a similar state.

“I’m sure the Heart...well maybe...”

I held up a hoof to bring their attention back.

“I just read a history on the Empire that made mention of something I haven’t seen anywhere else. I’m sure it’s a detail nopony thought important enough for the books.”

I stood up and stretched.

“Don’t you guys ever have to build new buildings or anything?”

Shining Armor shook his head.

“We haven’t had to. There’s actually a fair number of empty shops and houses.”

“Left empty from the Dark Age I assume?”

Sunburst nodded. I let out a sigh.

“So nopony really remembers the mines.”

They both inched closer. Shining Armor narrowed his eyes.

“What mines?”

I looked back out to the frozen wasteland.

“The Crystal Mines. Apparently Mount Everhoof is home to the largest deposit of gemstones in all of Equestria.”

Sunburst seemed skeptical.

“If there was a gemstone deposit, they would have found an entrance or something by now. Mount Everhoof has expeditions to it every ten years or so. And that been happening for the last hundred years!”

I smiled.

“I’ve read about every one of those expeditions before. They all followed the same path because it’s the only known safe path.”

Shining Armor stepped forward.

“So there’s another route that would lead to the mines?”

“Exactly.”

Sunburst shook his head.

“I still don’t understand. What does this have to do with our current problem?”

I took a deep breath. This was where it got iffy, but I had to voice my concern.

“Sombra’s spirit is lingering somewhere. That sliver of crystal is evidence enough. But his spirit isn’t just floating around on the ice. It would have to be somewhere that could house that sort of power.”

Sunburst lit up.

“And an entire mine of crystal would be the perfect conduit! Crystals can be vessels for nearly every type of magic. I suppose it’s not too big of a stretch to imagine a soul being contained within one.”

I nodded.

“Somewhere on that mountain is a hidden entrance. All we have to do is find it. He’s in there somewhere. Maybe we can destroy whatever is left of his spirit.”

Shining Armor sighed.

“That’s a long shot. Are you sure about it?”

Hopefully.

“Positive.”

“But we can't just go to Mount Everhoof and start walking around. We have to know the exact point. Otherwise, we’ll freeze to death. Even with the proper gear.”

True enough. That made it a little difficult to move forward. I paced back and forth for a minute, making a plan.

“I’ve found one mention of the mines. There has to be more. I’ll find out where those mines are if I have to read every book in the library. In the Empire for that matter! But I’ll find those mines.”

Sunburst stepped forward.

“Shade, that could take months! Years even!”

I shook my head.

“I’ll pick up the pace. I can handle it.”

I turned to the two of them.

“I’m not leaving until I’ve destroyed the last remnant of that monster. Will you two help me when the time comes?”

They looked at each other for a moment. Shining Armor smiled.

“I suppose it only makes sense.”

Sunburst nodded.

“You can count on us.”

I nodded back. This was going to be tough. I’d gotten lucky finding one mention of the mines. Would I be able to find what I needed? And was I right about Sombra being there?

I kept my composure, determined to look confident. I had to believe I was right. I had to believe that I’d find the answer.

I had to believe it was possible to end this nightmare.

Journeying North

I spent the next month reading every book I could get my hooves on. Subject didn't matter. I couldn't leave anything to chance.

Sunburst and I fell into a groove. Once he brought one stack of books, he'd go to retrieve the next. it kept me going without breaks. The only problem was the librarian insisted on us putting back all the books ourselves every day. I suppose it was only fair as I was going through close to a thousand books a day.

Sunburst did his best to keep up and supplied me with everything A-Z. The only time we gave ourselves a break was to eat meals. I half expected him to be complaining after the first few days, but he never voiced any sort of discomfort.

We'd reached the end of Day 32 when he finally said something.

"Are we getting close?"

"I actually had the information I needed on Day 5."

He nearly fell over.

"What?!"

I shrugged.

"You just seemed to be enjoying yourself so much. I didn't want to spoil your fun."

"Fun? FUN?! This hasn't been fun! I could have-"

He stopped himself as he registered the smile on my face.

"You're joking, aren't you?"

I nodded.

"To be honest, I'm not sure. I've gathered a lot of intel on Mount Everhoof, crystals, the Empire, any exploration to the North... I know I'm missing something. And the longer I'm here reading, the angrier I'm getting. I should have found something!"

Sunburst nodded.

"I understand. It's strange that the mines wouldn't be on record anywhere."

"Right?! How could there be no..."

I trailed off as the gears in my head began turning again.

"No record..."

I looked around the room and found Emerald Dawn's book.

"This book has one of the few references. Why?"

Sunburst looked at the book.

"Emerald Dawn... I know that name! She was a prominent historian. She was known for being thorough with her details."

"I know that much."

"The Crystal ponies thought this book was lost for a long time."

"What?"

Sunburst nodded.

"It was discovered hidden away in a secret compartment in her old house. Along with a few artifacts and other papers."

"Would I be right in assuming there was another book?"

"I'm...not sure. Why?"

I shook my head.

"No reason."

That explained how her accounts of everything had survived. She'd hidden them away. It's like she knew there were things she'd written that were important.

"No records..."

Then it clicked.

"We're not finding anything because Sombra wiped every trace of the mines from the Empire."

Sunburst looked confused.

"What about the Crystal ponies? Surely one of them would remember... Of course, they wouldn't! Nopony remembers anything from before Sombra. He wiped their memories!"

I nodded.

"Once Emerald realized what Sombra was doing, she hid anything that might be important."

"But she didn't write the location?"

I shook my head.

"It might have been too risky. Or she didn't know exactly."

I opened the book to the proper page, looking at the passage.

The only thing that towered over the Crystal palace was the Great Mountain, home to the Crystal MinEs. It was from the MinEs our greatest resource came. Tales of the vast tunnels have become legend now.

Wait...

I looked over the passage again, my frustration growing.

"Curse my eyes!"

Sunburst flinched at my outburst.

"What's wrong?"

"It's been in front of me the whole time! But I didn't process the letters!"

I turned the book to him and pointed to the passage. He read it slowly. His eyes lit up once he saw it.

"She wouldn't have made a mistake like that! It must be it!"

I grabbed a map of the Empire and set it out in front of me.

"It would make sense to assume that the main entrance was somewhere on the south face. They had to haul huge amounts of crystal! You couldn't do it from anywhere else. But if Sombra was trying to hide the mines, he would have collapsed the entrance."

"how does that help us?"

I shook my head.

"Sombra was obsessed with crystals. He wouldn't have deprived himself of an entire mine full of them. If the mines are as vast as I imagine, that means there would have been multiple entrances."

"And he left one open for himself!"

"Exactly! And Emerald knew which one. It's on the eastern face of Everhoof."

I pointed on the map.

"I've read everything I could find about this mountain. The eastern face is dangerous, difficult to navigate, and..."

Sunburst looked uneasy.

"And?"

I looked him in the eye.

"It's the only place that has ever had an actual Windigo sighting."

"That's...not possible."

"Oh? You're so sure they don't exist?"

"Windigos are an old pony's tale!"

"And we're trying to see if a dead pony has come back! Do you really think that Windigos of all things aren't possible in this crazy world?"

That shut him up. I let out a sigh.

"We have to go the eastern face of Everhoof. There has to be something up there."

"That's a lot of ground to cover."

"East is the only direction we were given. The rest is up to us."

As soon as we'd discussed our plans with Shining Armor and Cadance, we'd begun packing. I retired to the room Cadance had prepped for my stay. There wasn't much for me to pack. We couldn't afford to bring more than necessary. So, I packed as light as I could.

I placed my bag next to the door when I was finished. I'd be ready to go once Shining Armor returned with the snow gear.

My eye caught the open scroll on my desk. It was the letter Rarity had sent me a few weeks ago. I hated telling her how delayed I'd be, but she'd been more than understanding.

I hadn't told her about why I was up here. I couldn't bring myself to tell her of the danger I was in. I sighed.

"Maybe one day. After all of this."

Then the dark thought crossed my mind; what if I didn't make it?

I shook my head. I didn't want to think of that. But...

I approached the desk and pulled out a new piece of parchment.

My dearest Rarity,

If you receive this letter, then I'm not here anymore.
I'm sure Cadance and Shining Armor may have told you what happened.
I was too scared to tell you what I was doing up here.

I doubt I could ever express just how much I love you.
You've been the greatest part of my life by far.
I'm so thankful for everything everypony has done for me.
But you, more than anypony, helped me learn to live again.

I'll never stop loving you.

Shade

I rolled up the scroll and put a seal on it.

'Knock Knock Knock'

I turned to the door.

"Come in."

The door opened to reveal Shining Armor. He had a coat and a bag in front of him.

"Layers and climbing gear."

I took the coat and began putting it on.

"How long will it take us to get there?"

"Two days to the base. After that, I think it will be up to chance. I've got enough supplies to last a week. If we haven't found anything by then we'll need to come back."

I nodded.

"Hopefully it doesn't come to that. If we go back, the landscape will change too much. We'd be searching all the same spots again."

"Even with three ponies, it's going to be tough."

I smiled.

"I had an idea about the excavating."

We made a speedy exit from the Empire to avoid unwanted questions. The only pony who saw us off was Cadance.

I'd given her my letter in case of anything. She agreed to hold it.

"You'll be back. I'm sure it will turn out to be nothing."

I could see in her eyes that she didn't really believe that, but I knew why she was kidding herself. If I didn't come back, there was a chance that meant Shining Armor wasn't coming back. I'm sure that wasn't an acceptable outcome to her.

After that, we made for the border as quickly as we could. I wasn't prepared for just how cold it was.

"Sweet Celestia!"

Shining Armor snickered.

"Too cold for you?"

"How are you not freezing?!"

He smiled.

"I am. But I've come out here more than you."

I looked at Sunburst. He was shivering, but otherwise silent.

My eyes took in the tundra ahead. It was vast and white. There was nothing in sight except for the mountains. Our only company was the wind that was blowing us sideways.

We marched well into the night before Shining Armor finally called it. He set up the tent and we all crawled in. It was cramped, but at least it was warm.

Sunburst threw back his hood and shook his head.

"I never realized how much there was beyond the Empire."

Shining Armor nodded.

"The world is always bigger than you imagine."

His horn lit up and three small bags appeared from his saddlebag.

"Dinnertime."

We ate our meager meal gratefully, enjoying every morsel. Shining Armor finished first and unrolled his sleeping bag.

"We'll get a few hours of sleep before moving on."

I nearly chocked on my last bite.

"Only a few hours? So, we'll be moving in the dark?"

He nodded.

"You don't want to sleep for too long out here. Staying put means being found by some beast or freezing to death."

"Oh. Is that all?"

He chuckled.

"Didn't learn that in your books, huh?"

I rolled my eyes.

"I didn't come across any books on hunting ghosts in the snow."

Sunburst started laughing.

"We could have at least found you a wilderness survival guide!"

They both broke down, laughing at my expense. I let out a long sigh.

We pressed on as fast as we could, taking short breaks to sleep after stints of several hours at a time. Shining Armor's estimate was spot on. After two days of walking along the tundra, we reached the base of Everhoof.

I looked up at the mountain, unable to see the top.

"What have I gotten myself into?"

"Come on!"

I looked to see Shining Armor moving to the east.

"We should look for any kind of path."

Sunburst and I followed him, keeping our eyes open for any signs.

We began to slowly climb as we searched for a path. I kept an eye on the peak above. With every passing minute we inched towards the east face. The only problem was that we still hadn't found a path.

After two hours of slow ascent, we stopped for a breather. The wind was picking up. Shining Armor looked up at the sky.

"A storm is coming. We'll need to make camp soon."

I stepped forward, still shivering.

"Then it's time to search. We can't risk a storm dropping more snow on us."

Sunburst looked crestfallen.

"How do we even start?"

I smiled.

"Leave it to me."

The idea had come to me after reading about some of the indigenous species of the North. I hadn't done a transformation like this in a long time.

I focused on the form and a green circle of magic appeared around me. It began growing bigger, covering a good portion of the slope. Shining Armor and Sunburst stepped back as quickly as they could.

I felt the magic engulf me. My body began to stretch and bend. I felt like I'd been turned into rubber as I grew larger.

When the green light died down, I found myself looking down at my fellow climbers. Sunburst fell over in shock.

"Sweet Celestia! I didn’t know you could change into something that big!"

Shining Armor grinned.

"I'll be damned. Never thought I'd stand this close to an Ursa Major."

I growled my amusement and turned to the mountain. It was time to dig.

I set a paw in the snow and let it sink, curling my claws and scooping the snow. I pulled the first scoop away, revealing the mountain surface underneath. Scoop after scoop revealed more mountain. Still nothing.

The wind began to pick up more. The storm must be close.

I kept digging, uncovering more rocky surface. I growled in frustration. The mine entrance must be further up. I reached up higher and took another load of snow.

There! A thin path was carved into the mountain's face. All we had to do was follow it!

I pointed to my discovery. Shining Armor and Sunburst made their way to it as fast as they could while I plowed more of the path.

The wind was really picking up. And it was beginning to snow. No! We needed more time.

And that's when I heard it. One of the most chilling things I'd ever heard;

A distant whinny carried in by the wind...

I began digging faster. I cleared the path, praying that the mine would be revealed sooner.

It was getting closer.

I was beginning to panic. It must have shown, because Shining Armor looked up at me and shouted over the wind.

"What's wrong?"

I didn't stop. I didn't dare. I kept following the path.

And then my paw disappeared into the mountain.

I smiled. One swift paw movement cleared most of the snow and ice out of the mine entrance.

Another whinny, much closer.

I turned around, my eyes darting around the nearby peaks.

And then I saw them. A herd of Windigos.

I released my magic and felt myself shrink rapidly. I was back to normal in the blink of an eye, standing at the entrance to the mines.

"Hurry!"

Shining Armor came around the corner first.

"What is it?"

I pointed out into the storm. His eyes followed my hoof, finding the Windigos instantly. He didn’t try to hide his shock and fear.

"Get inside quick!"

Sunburst came around the corner at full speed.

"Windigos! There are actual Windigos! Run!"

He sped past me into the mines. I followed close behind. I looked back to see Shining Armor cast a spell. A shimmer covered the entrance in a matter of seconds. I stopped, recognizing the spell.

"It's okay Sunburst. We're safe. I think."

Shining Armor turned to us and smiled.

"I've never met a creature that could break through my shield."

I couldn't help myself.

"Umm...didn't the changelings do that?"

He frowned.

"Well...no creature has ever broken through when I'm at my full strength."

Nice save.

I took a deep breath and looked around the entrance. Small crystals were sticking out of the stone walls. I couldn't help but grin.

We'd done it. We were in the crystal mines of Everhoof.

The Lost

We moved slowly into the tunnel ahead. There wasn’t any source of light.

We each conjured an orb of light, keeping it close. I was reminded of the darkness of that horrid room. Our lights didn’t illuminate much beyond a few hoofsteps.

As we moved further from the entrance, the temperature dropped. And that’s when I began to feel my stomach turn.

Sombra’s magic permeated the air down here.

The deeper we went, the more crystals there began to be around us. As we rounded a corner, I made a realization.

None of the crystals had any color. They were black as the darkness surrounding us.

I moved to the nearest one.

"This isn't good."

Sunburst came closer.

"It has the same energy as that shard we found."

Shining Armor came up on my other side.

"The air is thick with dark magic. The crystals must be overflowing with Sombra's power."

I looked along the tunnel. Black crystals were everywhere.

"It's like he stockpiled his magic in this mine. If every crystal is like this..."

Sunburst swallowed hard.

"There's enough power in this mountain to level the entire continent."

I nodded.

"He was ready for all-out war."

Shining Armor took a few steps further into the tunnel.

"No wonder he sealed these mines off. He didn't want anypony taking his source of power."

We continued deeper into the mountain, the darkness growing heavier.

Sunburst cleared his throat.

"Do we know where we're going?"

Shining Armor looked back at us.

"We're following the aura in here. I can feel it getting stronger."

I nodded.

"My stomach is in knots. This is just how I felt before. We have to be getting close."

Close

I froze.

"Did anypony hear that?"

Sunburst and Shining Armor looked confused. Sunburst shook his head.

"No. What did you hear?"

I shook my body from head to toe.

"Never mind. I must be imagining things."

We continued around several turns. The whole time I felt uneasy. As if...something was watching us.

I felt like I should turn around, but I wasn't sure I wanted to know if my suspicions were right.

Shining Armor came to another fork and nodded left.

"This way. The magic is getting strong."

Bad place

I froze again. I glanced at Sunburst. He was shaking. I took a breath and whispered.

"Did you hear that?"

"You mean something like a whisper behind us? Nope."

He hurried over to Shining Armor, who was looking around the route ahead.

I turned my head ever so slightly, daring to look behind me.

Don't

My head was turned just enough for my peripheral vision.

And I could just make out several things moving in the darkness...

I tried to stay calm, turning my head forward again.

"Who are you?"

No response.

I took a deep breath, nearly choking on the dark magic in the air, and joined Shining Armor and Sunburst.

"Whatever you do, don't look back. Just keep following the trail."

They both turned forward and we began walking side-by-side. We continued in silence for several minutes. As we turned a corner, I heard Sunburst stifle a gasp. He must have seen something out of the corner of his eye like me. Shining Armor finally broke the silence.

"Shade, what's following us?"

I strained my ears, listening to our pursuers. The noises I heard made the Windigos from earlier seem like a lullaby in comparison.

I began pouring over my knowledge of the darker creatures of the world. Nothing. I kept listening, hoping for a clue. There were several voices by this point.

Feed

Kill

Stay

Save us

That phrase made me stop. They wanted help?

Pain

I felt a lump growing in my throat. I knew what I needed to recall. As I thought about the information, I began to shiver.

Shining Armor and Sunburst had gotten a few steps ahead of me. When they noticed I wasn’t keeping up, they froze. Sunburst cleared his throat.

"Is there...a problem?"

"Yes...and no."

I had to be crazy for this.

"I need you two to go a little further. Without me."

Shining Armor shook his head.

"Out of the question."

"Can you just trust me on this? It's the only way I can know for sure."

"If we leave you back there-"

"Please! I know what I'm doing...I think."

They both stood there for a few seconds. Sunburst slowly nodded.

"I trust him. But we shouldn't go beyond the next turn."

Shining Armor stayed silent for a few seconds longer. He let out a sigh finally.

"Cadance will wring my neck if you die, but I'll trust you."

They began walking again. The light faded as they moved further down the tunnel. I looked at my own light orb.

Light out

No light

Light bad

"Will I be safe?"

Safe

No kill

No eat

Safe

Light out

I took a deep breath. Here goes nothing. I extinguished the orb and was engulfed by darkness.

I felt something like tar pressing against my left flank. Then my right. I was surrounded. I did my best not to whimper.

"What are you called?"

No name

Name gone

Lost

"But...He gave you a name."

No name

Hate name

Hate Him

"Please. I have to know. I think I know who you are, but you need to say it."

They fell silent. I still felt them pressing against me. I couldn't move.

And then one voice spoke.

Umbrum

I felt a single tear roll down my cheek.

Something touched my cheek, wiping the tear away.

Cry

Sad

You know us

I nodded.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Why come

Why here

I closed my eyes, trying to hold back the tears.

Why have you come here?

My eyes flew open, despite having nothing to look at. It was the same voice that had spoken their name. It sounded like a mare.

"You're different..."

Why are you here?

"We...we came to find Him."

Why?

"We came to kill Him."

He is shadow

He is hate

He is pain

The voices died down and the one voice returned.

He is dead already.

"But what about this place? His spirit is still here, isn't it?"

I was greeted by a chorus of hissing. It reminded me of the hive in my younger years.

We don't speak of his spirit. It curses this place.

"That's why we're here. His spirit is beginning to reach out to the Empire."

The Empire survives?

"Yes. It's thriving since his death."

And you wish to keep peace?

"Yes. We mean you no harm. We just want to rid the world of Sombra."

Another chorus of hissing. I began feeling pressure on all sides.

DO NOT SPEAK THAT NAME!!

"I'm sorry! Please!"

The pressure lessened but remained firmer than before.

Can you promise?

"Yes. We mean to end this nightmare."

And us?

I felt the tears building again.

"I'm sorry. I wish I had an answer to end your suffering."

The book

The book

THE BOOK

I heard something hit the floor.

"What was that?"

Light your horn. But only to the floor. Look at nothing else.

I did as I was told. My horn put off a warm glow, revealing a book on the floor. It was old. The pages had been leafed through often. I kept my head low to the floor, looking at the cover. There was no title.

"You think this has the answer?"

This book made us.

I nodded.

"So perhaps it can unmake you."

I picked the book up and put it in my saddlebag.

"I'll see what I can do. I promise not to leave you like this."

I had forgotten to extinguish my horn. So, when I looked forward, it was impossible to hold back a gasp of fear.

I was staring at the face of what I assumed was the voice's owner; an umbrum. It was black with the most piercing green eyes. The form resembled a pony but seemed to flow and morph as if it were made of water. Its eyes narrowed.

"You must swear by all you hold dear."

I couldn't stop myself from shaking.

"I...I swear...on everything...my life, my friends, my family...and my honor."

The umbrum moved closer. It looked me in the eyes, staring into my very soul.

"You are haunted by Him."

I nodded.

"I've read things I wish I hadn't."

The eyes opened fully.

"Read?"

I nodded.

"Two books. One that He created, and one by a pony. I know too well what happened back then. And I know what happened to create all of you. I don't think I will ever be free of that knowledge."

The umbrum stared at me for a few seconds. It seemed to be surprised.

"You read...my book?"

I locked eyes with the umbrum. Her eyes were a dark shade of green. I felt the tears fall as I realized who I was speaking too.

"Emerald..."

I saw a small light ahead of me. As I grew closer, I began to see Shining Armor and Sunburst.

Shining Armor sighed when he saw me.

"Thank Celestia you're safe."

Sunburst looked behind me.

"Are you being followed?"

I nodded.

"And we'll be followed the whole way."

"What?!"

"If I explain, can we keep moving forward?"

Shining Armor nodded.

"Yeah. I want to get out of these damn mines as fast as possible."

We started walking again. I took a deep breath and began explaining.

"There was a book hidden away beneath the library. It was written by Sombra. I read it. And then I burned it to ash."

Sunburst looked at me in shock.

"That's why you smelled like smoke that day?"

I nodded.

"Nopony should ever have to read what I read in that book. But I'm going to tell you about one of the subjects in that damned tome."

Shining Armor glanced at me.

"Do you think that's wise?"

"It's the only way to tell you about what's happening."

I looked over my shoulder. I couldn't see the umbrum, but I knew they were there. I turned forward again.

"Sombra didn't just torture and kill ponies. He used some of them for experiments."

Sunburst swallowed.

"Experiments?"

"Yeah. He was obsessed with two things; power and immortality. He wanted to ensure he'd rule forever."

"What does that have to do with these experiments?"

"He was working on creating spells to augment his magic power and extend his life. But with such dangerous spells he couldn't test them on himself."

Shining Armor turned to me.

"He used ponies to test his magic on?"

I nodded.

"Dozens of times. Maybe even hundreds. I'm honestly not sure. The problem was that he failed constantly. Even though he tweaked the spells constantly, they always yielded the same results."

Sunburst was beginning to shiver.

"You mean..."

He glanced behind us. I slowly nodded.

"He began to call them the umbrum. They're creatures made from ponies and shadows. They've been living here for centuries, unable to die. None of them even remember what life was like before Sombra. Well, except for one of them."

"One of them?"

"She was the last umbrum ever created. The one that proved Sombra's spell a success."

Shining Armor stopped.

"So, she's like him?"

I nodded.

"A living shadow, unable to die. And that's what Sombra did to himself. He wasn't a unicorn anymore by the time Celestia and Luna defeated him."

Sunburst kept looking around the tunnel.

"And his power?"

"I assume these mines are answer enough. Once a crystal is imbued with your magic, you can use it as an extra reserve. And, if you were strong enough, I imagine you could access that power from anywhere. From the feel of these crystals, I would guess he nearly drained his magic every day to fill one stone."

"An entire reserve of magic in each crystal?! But that would be insane!"

"Think about who you're talking about."

Shining Armor looked behind us.

"What about these umbrum? Are they a threat?"

I shook my head.

"They have nothing but hate for Sombra. Once they knew we were here to end whatever is left of him, they agreed to not interfere."

"It was that easy?"

"Not by a long shot. They also want my help in finding a way to kill them."

That made them both stop. I turned to look at the two of them.

"What?"

They were both in shock. Sunburst was the first to speak.

"You said that so...calmly."

"So"

Shining Armor shook his head.

"Shade, you can't just kill them. We should try to save them!"

I shook my head back at him.

"That's not what they want at all. They've been trapped in here, left to rot by that tyrant. They've been suffering for a thousand years! None of them would be able to function in the outside world."

"They deserve a chance."

We don't want a chance.

I closed my eyes. Shining Armor turned to the darkness.

"We can try to reverse what Sombra did to you!"

We don't want that. We want death. Shade promised.

Sunburst turned around, his knees shaking.

"Surely we can figure something out. We could take you somewhere! Away from the mines."

No. We must stay. Nopony must see.

I stepped in front of the stallions, my frustration boiling to the surface.

"Listen to her! They've made up their mind."

I sat down, my body beginning to feel the exhaustion of the last few days.

"I know it's a common belief that anything can be fixed. Villains can change, bad things can be undone, or a song can somehow fix the problem. But you need to realize that that's not true. This is one thing that can't be fixed."

Shining Armor looked at me for a second before turning to the darkness.

"Is there nothing we can do?"

We stared into the abyss, waiting for her answer.

We cannot live anymore. We wish to pass out of all memory.

Shining sighed.

"Then I hope we can help you."

He turned back around.

"We should keep moving."

Sunburst and I nodded, and we all fell in side-by-side again. We didn't look back as we continued further into the mines.

I only glanced back once, as we turned the corner.

Two emerald eyes stared back.

Be strong. He is near.

Darkness Dies

The magic had grown steadily stronger as we descended into the depths of the mines.

I knew we were getting close when I felt my stomach getting ready to heave. It couldn’t take the toxic air anymore. Before I could say anything though, Sunburst turned away and vomited himself. And Shining Armor wasn’t far behind.

I threw up last, unable to resist any longer. I took a deep breath after and straightened up.

“We’re close.”

Shining Armor nodded, pointing ahead.

”That next corner.”

We slowed our pace and approached the corner. Sunburst sent a light orb ahead, giving us our first view of our target.

The orb lit up a cavern covered in black crystals. And at the back of the cavern was a crystal that reached to the ceiling. It was huge!

My eyes narrowed as I noticed something off about the crystal. There was a black mist surrounding it. And for some reason, the mist looked slightly familiar.

"What is that?"

Shining Armor looked at me.

"It's a cavern of crystals."

"No. That mist."

Shining Armor looked again and shook his head.

"I don't see anything Shade."

Sunburst peeked around us, squinting his eyes.

"What do you see?"

"It's like a cloud covering that giant crystal."

"I can tell it's got a high concentration of magic, but that wouldn't be visible."

Shining Armor turned to me.

"Are there things that only changelings can see?"

"I don't..."

I trailed off as my head registered where I'd seen the mist before. The air in the hive had been tinted with the same thing! One of the many reasons I liked going on my missions was to get away from those fumes.

"I know what it is."

They both leaned in. Sunburst looked at the crystal again.

"What are you seeing?"

"It's...hatred."

They both stared at me, confused. I rolled my eyes.

"Changelings can sense almost any feeling on the spectrum. Love is like a magnetic field, sadness is like a bad smell, and so on. But hatred...we can see that. A black mist that seeps into everything. The very air is almost rank if there's enough of it. The hive was swimming in this stuff when I was little."

Shining Armor glanced at the crystal.

"Does it pose any threat?"

I looked at the cloud again, studying its composition. Something was different about this feeling.

"Strange... It's like Sombra's magic has...bonded with it. Then again, I shouldn't be surprised that so much hatred is mixed into his own magic. I've just never seen anything like it."

I shook my head.

"I don't think it's a threat, but I can't be certain until we go in there."

Shining Armor nodded.

"Okay then. Let's go."

He led the way around the corner, and we entered the cavern. The air was thick with dark magic. I did my best to take small breaths, hoping to keep out the worst of it.

We approached the large crystal, its form towering over us.

Shining Armor stopped several hoofsteps away.

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

I stared at the crystal, it's black color all-consuming.

And then I saw a small twinkle of green.

"Did anypony-"

It was too late. A beam of magic shot out at Shining Armor. His eyes clouded as they took on the same green of the magic.

Sunburst jumped forward.

"Shining Armor!"

Another beam hit Sunburst and he suffered the same fate. I locked my eyes on the crystal as a third beam hit my head.

My head went blank and everything faded.

I opened my eyes and found myself in a pile of rubble. I took a breath, only to cough on the fumes in the air.

I sat up, my eyes beginning to focus on the scene in front of me.

I was in Canterlot. The throne room to be exact. Or what was left of the throne room anyway...

I stood up and looked around.

"No. No, this is wrong. I was... I was somewhere... Wasn't I?"

My eyes found a banner on the wall. It bore the image of a red horn. Sombra's horn.

"No!"

My brain flooded with memories of an attack. And the fires. And Sombra rising from the shadows. The resistance was failing and there was no hope. Our allies had fallen. Twilight was gone. I'd watched Ponyville burn to the ground.

I looked up to where the thrones should be. My blood turned cold as I took in the scene.

Sombra stood at the top of the stairs.

And a few steps below, the lifeless bodies of Celestia, Luna, and Rarity.

Sombra began to laugh as my tears fell. The laughter grew deafening. My eyes screwed shut in pain. I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted nothing more than to hide away from this nightmare.

My eyes flew open at that realization.

"NO!!!"

The bodies turned to dust. Sombra looked confused.

"What?!"

I looked around the castle ruins and it began to turn to dust. Sombra growled in anger.

"No!!"

My attention turned to Sombra and he burst into a cloud of dust.

I was suddenly back in the cavern. My vision was blurry for a few seconds as my brain restarted. What had happened to the battle? The resistance?

My vision cleared and my brain reconnected the dots.

"A nightmare. It was nothing but a nightmare."

A low growl came from the crystal, shaking the cavern. I looked into the stone, searching for the source of the noise. It was just as dark as before.

How did you break my spell?

The voice echoed through the whole room.

"Sombra."

No pony can break my magic.

I found myself smiling.

"Impressive to say the least. False memories? Greatest fears? You sure know how to make a convincing nightmare. But I was taught how to control nightmares."

Another cavern-shaking growl. My smile grew.

"What's wrong? Not a fan of-"

I felt another bolt to the head.

I walked into the boutique, excitement making me shiver. There was Rarity.

"Hello Shade."

I smiled and presented a ring.

"I love you Rarity."

She stared at the ring for a moment. And then she started laughing.

"You thought I actually loved you?!"

She kept laughing as my heart broke inside. What was happening?

My mind clicked again.

I was in front of Sombra's crystal again. I had to take several breaths before speaking.

"You can do that a hundred times. I'll still come back for you."

The growl turned into a roar and another bolt came at me.

I emerged from the tunnels into the throne room. Chrysalis sat on her throne, looking triumphant.

"Look who came crawling back!"

I stared at the floor.

"I'm...sorry..."

"I don't want your apology! I want your life!!"

She sprang from her throne and landed on top of me. Her teeth met my neck and I screamed.

Click.

I was panting, trying to get enough air in my body.

The hatred around the crystal was swirling faster. He was getting angry.

That last nightmare had been too real. I could still feel those fangs sapping the love and life out of me.

I felt a smile growing as something stupid popped into my head.

"Thanks for the idea."

Another bolt came, but I dodged it. I focused all my magic into one act. I wasn't even sure if it would work now that my biology was so different. But I had to try.

My face screwed up in pain as I felt the spell take effect at a sluggish pace.

What foolishness is this?

I opened my eyes a fraction. Shining Armor and Sunburst were still under the spell. I had to pray that what I was going to do would wake them up.

As the magic took full effect, I let out a howl of pain. It echoed through the cavern and out into the tunnels. It was far more painful than the last time I'd done this.

And then the spell stopped. The pain was still there, but the magic had done its work. I reached up to check my handiwork.

My fangs were back.

I was on my knees, inhaling as much air as I could. My body felt weak after the effort. Would I have the strength?

I slowly stood up and bared my fangs at the crystal.

What are you?

I hissed at the crystal.

"You may dwell in the dark, but I was born into it!"

I am the Lord of Shadows! I fear nothing!

I smiled.

"I don't want your fear."

I opened my mouth and began to inhale. As I did, I let my changeling magic take over.

The cloud of magic and hatred began to flow away from the crystal and into me.

What is this?

I kept my concentration on the task at hoof. My insides were burning. Would I be able to keep this up long enough?

The cloud was slowly growing smaller. Another roar shook the cavern.

Stop!

I kept inhaling. The putrid taste on my tongue made me want to vomit it all back up, but I knew I couldn't risk stopping.

STOP!!

The cloud had shrunk by a third.

And then I heard a gasp from my left.

"What? What happened? Where's Cadance?"

I broke the spell for a split second.

"Break the crystal!!"

I resumed my foul meal, leaving Shining Armor to register what was happening.

"Huh? Shade? Wait... where's that stuff coming from?"

He could see it now that I was interacting with it. That would help.

"Wha- What's going on?"

Good, Sunburst was awake. The two of them would be able to strike the final blow.

I could see both from the corner of my eye. They were staring at me and the crystal. Sunburst tried to run forward, but Shining Armor held him back.

"He said something about breaking the crystal!"

"How? It's covered in that mist he was talking about!"

"We need to find an opening!"

I redoubled my efforts and tried to speed up the process. The cavern began shaking again.

You will not defeat me!

Shining Armor and Sunburst both flinched at the voice. Their eyes locked on the crystal. I followed their gaze.

Inside the crystal, something was taking shape. A black mass with green eyes and a red horn.

I wanted to scream, but circumstances didn't permit my fear. I held my ground.

Shining Armor and Sunburst slowly approached the crystal, each taking a side. They were looking for their opening.

Suddenly Sunburst called out.

"Here! There's a hole!"

Shining Armor rushed over. I could see it from where I stood. It was barely the size of a bit. Too small.

Even as I worked my magic, a scream burst from me. Not a scream of pain though. It was a battle cry.

The shape in the crystal reared back.

I will not die!!

"Now!"

The shape and I both looked. Shining Armor and Sunburst were in front of the hole, now big enough for their aim to be true. They fired spell after spell at the crystal. Cracks began forming.

The shape was taking its full form now. Sombra's face appeared from the shadows.

NO!!

A large splinter went up the middle of the stone, making Sombra flinch.

I released my magic and fell to the floor, watching as cracks formed from the single splinter. They spread rapidly. Sombra's anger melted away, turning to fear.

I can't end!

A chip fell from the crystal. And then another. And another.

And then the crystal burst into a million pieces. A cloud of darkness emerged, swirling around the room. It created a wind that would have carried a pony off into the unknown.

Shining Armor and Sunburst ran over to me, flattening themselves to the floor.

A green bolt fired towards us. No. Not us. The crystals behind us. The bolt connected and the crystals lit up. The black magic within them flowed along the bolt of energy, joining the darkness.

Shining Armor screamed over the wind.

"What's he doing?!"

Sunburst looked from the cloud to the crystals. He shouted back to us.

"He's a disembodied spirit. He can't exist here without a proper vessel. It's taking all his magic just to hold on!"

I looked at the other crystals in the cavern. Sure enough, Sombra was sucking his magic reserves dry just to try and survive. The crystals were returning to their original brilliance one by one.

Soon the whole cavern was a rainbow. Even what was left of the large crystal was changing.

The cloud roared and flew out into the tunnels. The wind died and the three of us were alone in the cavern.

I sat up, brushing some dirt off my flank.

"He's going to suck the mines dry. There won't be a trace of his magic left!"

Shining Armor stood up.

"Couldn't he find another crystal to hold him?"

Sunburst stood and stretched.

"It's unlikely, but not impossible. But how would we even find it? These mines are too big."

I brought myself to my knees and took a deep breath.

"I might have an idea about that."

I coughed as I finished standing. A spray of black liquid painted the floor. All three of us looked at the stain. I sighed.

"That can't be good."

Shining Armor shook his head.

"We need to get you back to the Empire. I don't know what you did exactly, but it wasn't good."

I shook my head back.

"We have to end this now."

I walked as fast as a I could into the tunnel.

"Emerald! Can you hear me?"

I waited in the darkness, hoping beyond hope.

He's not dead

I sighed in relief. She was here.

"I know. He's somewhere in the mines. Can the umbrum help us find him?"

A chorus of whispers rose as Shining Armor and Sunburst joined me. Sunburst leaned in close.

"Are you sure they'll help?"

The whispers stopped.

He's below.

I nodded.

"Can you lead us to him?"

Yes. But no light.

Shining Armor stepped forward.

"How will we know where we're going?"

We will take you. Lights out.

I nodded to the two of them and we all put our lights out. I instantly felt umbrum pressing on all sides. I held back a shudder.

They began dragging me forward, picking up their pace. It was like being caught in a river's current. I heard Shining Armor and Sunburst shouting behind me, no doubt shocked and afraid of the experience.

I felt us go around several turns and down several slopes as we made our way into the deepest part of the mines. We moved swiftly for what must have been several minutes before the umbrum began to slow down.

As they came to a stop, I felt the same aura of magic emanating from somewhere ahead of us.

"Sombra."

The umbrum pulled away from me, sinking back into the darkness. I heard them drop Shining Armor and Sunburst, the two of them falling to the floor. Sunburst stood up, brushing off his robe.

"A little warning would have been nice."

I summoned an orb and walked forward, looking at the gems lining the tunnel. They were the most remarkable shades of color I'd ever seen.

And then I saw it. A single black crystal nestled among the rainbow.

The aura was only coming from the one stone. I couldn't help but smile.

"Nowhere left for you to hide."

No! I will live forever!

The voice was soft, barely more than a whisper. And it sounded weak. I found myself smirking.

And then I shot a bolt of pure energy at the crystal.

It shattered. A wisp of black smoke emerged and faded into the air with a soft cry.

Shining Armor and Sunburst approached, observing the remains. Shining Armor nodded.

"It's done."

"Almost."

I turned to the tunnel behind us.

"I have a promise to keep."

I pulled the book the umbrum had given me from my saddlebag. I opened it to the first page, ready to find help.

I shut the book immediately.

Sunburst looked at me.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. But...I need to read this alone."

I looked at the darkness.

"Could you take them to the exit?"

Shining Armor objected as I extinguished my light.

"Wait just a damn second!"

It was too late. I heard the umbrum grab him and Sunburst. They were gone in a matter of seconds.

"Emerald?"

Yes?

"Where did you get this book?"

It was His.

"This isn't his. He had to have stolen it."

That was the book. He used it to change us.

I opened the cover again, reading the first page.

"This shouldn't be possible."

You must help us.

I sighed, rubbing my temples.

"Okay. Give me a minute."

I began flipping the pages, taking in everything. It took me a few minutes to get through the whole thing. I had even read the pages twice to make sure I understood the spells.

"Okay. I think I know what to do."

You can save us?

"I hope so. It's a long shot."

Please

I nodded and closed my eyes, allowing my magic to flow freely.

The spell demanded intense focus. I was using my magic to find contact with the ethereal plane, where arcane powers resided. It ebbed and flowed like a river, constantly in flux. And I was trying to capture an entry point.

There!

I grabbed hold with my mind and felt a surge of power as arcane magic flowed into my being. I opened my eyes and focused the energy. I only had one thought.

Banish all dark magic from this place.

I released the magic, the force leaving me like a wave. I finally saw the umbrum as the light washed over them for a split second. There were dozens of them. Maybe hundreds. the light continued through the tunnels, disappearing into the distance.

One of the umbrum began to shimmer. And another. One by one they began to glow. Their dark forms melted off, turning to ash. All that was left was a faint image of the ponies they used to be. They looked at each other, smiling as they faded from this world.

I looked in front of me and found Emerald Dawn. She had been restored to her former self. She wasn't faint like the others though. Before I could question her, she smiled.

"Thank you Shade."

Her form changed into something like a shadow. She disappeared, leaving me alone in the darkness. I summoned an orb and looked around the tunnel. Crystals were colorful, the air was clean, and all was quiet.

"All's well."

I coughed up another spray of black.

"Oh... Right."

My knees buckled and I collapsed. I groaned as the effects of the day took hold of my body.

"Shit! Why did I send those two away?"

I sent out a magic flare, praying they'd find me quick enough. Another hacking fit produced more liquid, this time black and red. I stared at the mixture of poison and blood, realizing my situation.

"Fuck."

My vision faded to black as I fell over.

Wakeup Call

The first thing I remember is standing in a black abyss. Was I still in the mines? I tried to produce some light from my horn, but nothing happened. My head dropped as I let out a groan. That was when I realized I could see my hooves. And my legs. So, I wasn’t in the pitch black. I began looking around, hoping to find a clue. Nothing...

I tried to say ‘hello’. My mouth moved, but no sound came out. I tried a few more times with the same result. What was going on? If I couldn’t call out for anypony, I’d have to start moving around. I took a hoofstep forward. My hoof felt heavier than normal. A few more steps proved that walking would be harder than expected. I looked around again, hoping something or somepony would be there.

My mouth began forming the word ‘help’. I tried yelling it, but still couldn’t find my voice. After a few minutes I stopped. Time to switch tactics. I lowered my voice to a whisper. Or at least I hoped I was doing that.

“Luna.”

I smiled. Now a little louder.

“Luna.”

Alright. Now we were getting somewhere.

“Luna!”

A dim light began to grow in the distance. I turned my hooves in that direction, moving them as fast as I could. It was slow going, but at least it was progress.

“Luna!”

The light grew stronger. And I was getting closer.

"Luna!”

A crack formed in the light.

Shade?!

“Luna?”

Shade!

The crack grew bigger. I needed one more good call. I took a deep breath, hoping I could get some volume.

“Luna!!”

The crack burst and Luna fell through. She landed in front of me, gasping for breath. As her eyes connected with me, she smiled.

“Finally.”

I felt my hooves grow lighter and I ran to her, pulling her into a tight hug. Her hooves closed around me with an iron grip. I could feel her tears on my back.

“I thought I’d never find you.”

I smiled.

“I haven’t been gone that long.”

She pulled away from me and wiped her tears.

“You...you don’t know...”

“Know what?”

“Shade, you know time passes differently when you're asleep.”

I felt a shiver go down my spine.

“But...I just got here.”

Luna sighed.

“You exposed yourself to a lot of dark magic. Not to mention accessing the ethereal plane! How in Tartarus did you even do that?!”

I narrowed my eyes.

“First you tell me how long I’ve been out.”

I could tell she wanted to ask more questions, but my glaring held her at bay. She took a breath before responding.

“You’ve been in a coma for six months.”

I blinked a few times as my head registered the fact. My rear slowly sank to the ground.

“Six months...”

Luna nodded.

“The fact I got through to you is good though. It means you’re beginning to wake up.”

I felt tears forming in my eyes. This was going to be a rough wake up call.

—————————

I knew I was awake when I felt how sore my body was. I began to moan.

"Shade?"

I cracked open an eye. My vision cleared to reveal Celestia standing next to me. I smiled.

"Good to see you."

She smiled back.

"Thank goodness."

"I told you he'd be fine."

I opened my other eye. I was in my room in the Crystal palace. Celestia was on my one side. I turned my head. Luna was standing on my other side with a smile.

"About time you woke up. You've had us worried."

"I'm sorry. I guess I didn't think things through. Again."

I felt a hoof connect with my shoulder, sending a flare of pain through my whole body.

"OWW!!"

I whipped my head back to Celestia. She looked furious.

"If you ever pull a stunt like that again I'll banish you to the Sun itself!"

"Well I stopped Sombra, didn't I?"

"By absorbing dark magic! And don't even get me started on what you did after."

I forced myself to sit up.

"You sent me up here to help, so I helped. Can we just leave it at that?"

"Like Tartarus we're going to leave it at that!"

Luna chimed in.

"Celestia? Perhaps we should let Shade tell us what happened."

I turned to Luna.

"Haven't Shining Armor and Sunburst told you?"

Luna shook her head.

"They don't remember."

That caught me off guard.

"What do you mean they don't remember?"

Celestia interrupted.

"Whatever you did in the mines wiped several of their memories. The only thing they remembered for sure was that Sombra was defeated."

I thought about the spell I had cast.

"Probably should have been a little more detailed. I asked for all dark magic to be banished from the mines. I guess it took any memories of dark magic too."

Celestia was beside herself.

"You asked?! You don't just ask arcane magic to do something!"

Luna furrowed her brow.

"Celestia!"

Celestia glared at her sister for a few seconds before sitting down.

"Fine. Go on Shade."

I cleared my throat and dove into my story. I told them about Sombra's tome, the umbrum, the crystals, and my solution for defeating Sombra. It was when I got to the final part that I had my own questions for them.

"So, once I destroyed the crystal, I knew I needed to try and help the umbrum."

Luna leaned forward.

"Was that what you were doing with that spell?"

I nodded.

"They gave me a book that Sombra had stashed in the mines. It was the book he used for his experiments. And it had directions on how to access the ethereal plane."

Celestia finally spoke up.

"I don't know how he could have found that knowledge."

I looked around the room and spotted my saddlebag. I summoned it to my bed, setting it on my lap.

"I know, though I'm not sure how he got this."

I pulled the book from my bag and set it in front of the sisters. Their eyes grew bigger by the second.

"That's not possible."

"I thought this was lost!"

"It was! I didn’t realize he’d gotten a hold of it!"

"I never thought we'd see this again."

I cleared my throat again, catching their attention.

"I doubt it really matters anymore how Sombra acquired it. It's back in your hooves now."

Celestia took the book, hugging it against her chest.

"Gusty's journal..."

Her eyes locked with mine.

"You read it?"

"I accessed the ethereal plane and used arcane magic. What do you think?"

Luna sighed.

"I suppose there's nothing to do but kill him now Celestia."

My head snapped to Luna.

"Now hold on!"

She flashed a half-smile.

"A joke Shade."

The smile faded.

"But you do understand how serious this is, right?"

Celestia nodded.

"This journal contains everything about alicorns."

I turned back to her.

"I thought you had other documents."

"Those just contain what we were able to write down from memory. Gusty gave us her journal when she passed, but somewhere along the way, it disappeared."

Luna chimed in.

"We spent years searching for it. After a while we just figured it had been destroyed or lost to history."

The gears turned in my head as I came to terms with the situation.

"So...I know everything about you now?"

They both nodded. I sat back against my pillow.

"The ethereal plane. That's where all your power and longevity comes from."

Celestia nodded again.

"When you accessed that magic, it was like dropping a rock in a pond."

Luna leaned in.

"We felt a disturbance in the plane. That's how we knew something was wrong. Shining Armor and Sunburst had just gotten you out of the mine when we arrived."

I closed my eyes.

"Rest assured I don't plan on doing it again. The sheer amount of power at my hooves was more than I could handle."

Celestia sighed.

"Absorbing dark magic and then casting an arcane spell? You have a death wish."

I couldn't help but chuckle.

"Probably. I'm just glad it's over. I assume I'll be able to go home soon?"

Celestia looked at Luna.

"Maybe you should talk to him. I should find somewhere to secure the journal."

She moved to the exit, calling over her shoulder.

"I'll be back in a bit!"

She left the room and I turned to Luna.

"What's wrong?"

Luna sat down.

"We've been trying to pull the dark magic out of you for months. But the way you absorbed it... We're not entirely familiar with changeling magic. We even asked Thorax if he had any advice."

"Thorax was here?"

"Briefly. He was shocked to learn you consumed hatred. He's never seen changeling magic used like that."

"So, I guess he couldn't help much."

"Not as much as he hoped."

"So..."

She sighed.

"Shade, the longer the magic was in your body, the more...entwined it became."

"Entwined? You mean..."

"It's integrated with your own magic power now."

I felt my lip tremble.

"I...I have Sombra's magic..."

"We're not entirely sure what traits you do and don't have. Only time will tell."

I felt a tear roll down my cheek. How could I have been so stupid?

Something quickly distracted me though. A single thought. My eyes widened in a panic.

"Rarity!"

I tried to jump out of bed, but Luna stopped me.

"It's okay Shade!"

"She must be worried sick!"

"It's okay. We took care of everything."

I stopped struggling and sat back.

"How? It's been six months!"

Luna took a breath and explained.

"When you weren't responding to her letters, she got in touch with us."

"What did you say?"

"We told her that the situation in the Empire had taken a turn that required complete secrecy."

"And that worked?"

She smiled.

"Not really. She seemed more concerned than before. And she didn't like being kept in the dark."

"That sounds like her."

"We told her that you were safe and that you'd be back as soon as possible. And that you sent your love."

I nodded.

"Thank you. I can't imagine what she's thinking right now."

Luna smiled.

"Get some rest. It's been a long road to recovery. We'll take you home in a few days."

She went to leave the room. Upon opening the door though, she found more visitors; Cadance, Shining Armor, and Sunburst.

Cadance beamed.

"I'm so happy to see you awake!"

I smiled as the three entered the room. Luna snuck out behind them and closed the door. I focused my attention on my new visitors.

"Glad to see everypony in one piece!"

Shining Armor smiled.

"Thanks to you I'm guessing!"

Sunburst nodded.

"We don't remember everything exactly, but I assume that Sombra had something to do with that."

They didn't suspect anything. It was probably better that way. I glanced at Cadance, noticing a knowing glint in her eye. She had an idea of what had transpired in the mines. I refocused on the guys.

"I'm glad nopony else got hurt. What have you guys been up to since I keeled over?"

Shining Armor shrugged.

"Not a ton. Life in the Empire is pretty quiet. Everhoof was the most exciting thing to happen in a long time."

I chuckled.

"Well I'm glad I could provide entertainment."

Cadance rolled her eyes.

"I wouldn't call hunting down Sombra's ghost entertainment."

I turned back to her.

"Is that shard still locked away?"

She nodded.

"The aura has disappeared around it, but I'm leaving it in there to be safe."

"Good. He must have pulled the magic from that too. I imagine the Empire will love the new supply of crystals."

"It's a wonderful surprise. The Crystal ponies will love it once we announce the discovery."

Shining Armor nudged her.

"Maybe we should save it until after we get back."

I looked at the two of them.

"Where are the two of you disappearing to?"

Shining Armor smiled.

"My parents won a free vacation. They've invited the whole family!"

I smiled back.

"I'm sure you could all use the time together. When do you leave?"

"It's in a week. I can't wait to see everypony."

Cadance shook her head.

"Neither can I. Flurry needs more time with her grandparents."

I let out a long sigh.

"I could use a vacation after all of this."

Sunburst chuckled.

"You've been asleep for six months. Do you really need more rest?"

The three of them began to laugh. I couldn't help but join in.

Six months. I could only imagine what had happened in all that time. I did my best to put everything to the back of my mind; Sombra, the umbrum, the coma, the dark magic… I didn’t want to think about any of that now. There was only one thing I had on my mind; I was ready to see Rarity.

Coming Home

I stepped off the train, my legs still regaining their strength. I looked around the platform of the Ponyville station with a certain nostalgia. It felt like ages since I'd seen it. Or the town.

I left the platform and began walking. It was slow going for sure. My body was still pretty banged up despite appearances. My limp was worse than normal. I'd even discovered a few new scars on my body from the ordeal.

The biggest difference was my own doing; the fangs. I hadn't had the strength to get rid of them entirely. They'd receded enough not to hang out. But if I grinned, they were in full view. That was going to be fun to explain.

I wandered through town, taking in the sights. Everything seemed so peaceful. It brought a smile to my face. I listened to ponies haggling over prices and trading town gossip. It was comforting. With everything that Equestria had been through, everypony still found a way to live their lives.

Would I be able to do the same?

I found my thoughts turning back to Everhoof. I still couldn't stomach the idea of sharing any traits with Sombra. And what if I'd taken on any of his biological traits? Did that mean I was something like the umbrum?

I furrowed my brow, banishing everything from my mind.

"That's not going to help one bit."

It didn't matter what I was or what power I had. I was Shade. That's all that mattered to me.

I turned a corner and saw the boutique. I began walking a little faster, my legs steadying ever so slightly.

The boutique door flew open before I even got close. Rarity came running out, her eyes tearing up. I stopped my advance and my legs gave out. My rear hit the ground as Rarity grabbed hold of me.

We didn't say anything for a few minutes. What was there to say? All we could do was hold each other tight and cry.

As we both began to reign in our tears, she leaned up and kissed me. I felt my heart melt as her lips pressed against mine. I'd never felt more at home than I did in that moment.

She pulled away and looked me over, her head beginning to shake.

"You look awful."

I couldn't help but laugh. She joined in after a second.

I sat up in bed, the sweat pouring down my face.

"Shade?"

I looked over at Rarity. She was still half-asleep. I shook my head.

"Just a nightmare. I...I'll be okay."

She looked at me for a few moments before nodding and turning over. I sat there, waiting for her breathing to slow as she fell back asleep. It didn't take long.

I got out of bed and went downstairs to the kitchen. I poured myself some cider and grabbed one of my pills.

It hadn't been long before the nightmares had started. And it wasn't long before Rarity realized that I wasn't dreaming about Everfree or Chrysalis anymore. I'd told her bits and pieces of the truth over the months but couldn't bring myself to tell her everything.

She knew my assignment had to do with Sombra and that I'd had a run-in with some dark magic left over from his rule. She also knew I wasn't telling her the whole truth. But she never pushed me. It was painfully evident that I didn't like reliving the memories. So, she took what I gave her and didn't ask more of me.

After a month of nightmares and another battle with insomnia, Rarity had convinced me to see a doctor. I was limited on the details, but I gave enough that the doctor prescribed me medication for anxiety and panic attacks. And it helped. The nightmares were still happening, but the medication lessened the effects. I didn't wake up screaming anymore at least.

I sat in the dark with my cider, thinking about the coming week. I was going to be returning to Canterlot after a long absence.

Celestia and Luna had been more than understanding about my recovery. Life at the castle had continued without me there. Celestia would send me notes on the daily meetings in advance and I'd send along my opinions.

I had a good laugh when Luna informed me that the rumors of The Right Hoof had only increased since I now operated from an undisclosed location. I was truly a phantom within the royal courts.

The timing had lined up well for my return. The girls had been busy getting ready to open Twilight's school. I couldn't believe they were going to be teachers! Rarity was excited to show off her skills and help students learn her perspective on generosity.

I heard hoofsteps on the stairs. I glanced over and saw Rarity appear, rubbing her eyes.

"What time is it?"

"It's early. Not even sunrise."

She walked over to the table and kissed me on the head.

"Rough night?"

"You could say that?"

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not especially."

She nodded and grabbed my cider, taking a sip.

"Mmm. That hits the spot."

She sat down at the table and reached her hoof out to mine.

"I can't even begin to imagine what you're seeing in your dreams. I hope you know that I'm here for you."

I put my hoof on hers.

"I know Rare. It's just...hard to explain. I wish I could forget it all."

She took another sip of cider before passing it to me. I threw my pill in my mouth and took a swig. Rarity sighed as I set the cup down.

"I don't envy you having to deal with that horrid beast. I'm just glad you survived the whole ordeal."

"I don't feel like it some days. Some days I feel like I'm nothing but a shadow. Just...melting away in the sun."

I looked at Rarity. Her eyes were fixed on the table.

"Shade?"

I looked down.

My hoof was actually melting!

I jerked my hoof back. It lagged, flowing like paint on a brush. I felt my pulse growing faster.

My hoof began reforming. After a few seconds it looked normal again. I touched it to the table. Solid.

Rarity looked at me, her eyes expressing concern.

"What happened up there Shade?"

I kept staring at my hoof.

"Of all the things that would stick..."

I glanced at Rarity. I knew I couldn't keep hiding.

"The dark magic I encountered...it was threatening all of us. So, I...I absorbed the magic to save Shining Armor and Sunburst."

"Is that why your fangs grew back?"

I nodded.

"Celestia and Luna tried to get the magic out of me, but it took too long. So now..."

"Now you can use it?"

I nodded again.

"The dark magic had the same aura as Sombra. I...I think it's his power I absorbed. I had hoped nothing would be too obvious, but that's out the window now. It looks like I have his ability to turn into shadow."

I looked at my hoof again, this time focusing. It began to lose its form again. I changed direction and reformed it again.

"I'll need to keep an eye on that. I don't want to lose control in public."

Rarity reached out, hesitating as her hoof came close to mine. She lightly pressed against it. As she felt the solidity of it, she let her hoof fall into mine.

"I'm so sorry you have this burden on you. It's not fair you should have to deal with so much darkness in your life still."

I smiled.

"That's why I'm glad I have you. You're the light of my life."

She blushed.

"Shut up."

I stood in the center of the room, focusing on my objective.

Luna was pacing around me.

"Good. You're gaining better control."

I looked down at my body. It was blurring into a black mass. I felt the magic climbing up my neck.

"This is too weird."

The magic engulfed my face and I felt my entire body lose mass. I felt lighter than the air. I looked at Luna, or at least I think I was.

"Do you think I'm ready to try moving?"

She smiled.

"If you feel up to it. Perhaps a short trip though."

She opened the doors out onto her tower's balcony.

"From here to Celestia's tower and back."

I drifted to the balcony and turned to Celestia's tower. I imagined moving towards my target.

I wasn't ready for the speed.

I shot over to the tower, zig-zagging through the air. My hooves touched down on Celestia's balcony as my body reformed.

"Yes!"

I turned around, spotting Luna on her balcony.

"Excellent! Now come back."

I stretched my hooves and focused.

Nothing.

I looked down at my body.

"Come on!"

I looked back at Luna.

"It's not working! It's like I'm out of magic!"

Luna shrugged.

"Maybe you are. That reserve may be a lot smaller than your own. Practice will build your stamina."

"How do I get back over there?"

She motioned behind me. I turned around and groaned.

"She's going to hate me in the morning."

I tapped on the balcony door. The sound of a disgruntled Celestia emanated from inside.

The door handle glowed with her aura. The door swung in and I hurried through the room. I glanced in passing at the bed. Celestia had one eye open, glaring at me.

"Next time, I leave you out there."

The weeks passed as I continued my duties. Ever since the Storm King incident, things had been relatively quiet. I hopped between Canterlot and Ponyville, helping the princesses where I could. Twilight was getting better at her paperwork. Some days she had nothing for me to do. It seemed being Headmare was giving her some good experience. Today was another one of those days.

I was standing in Twilight's office at the school.

"Are you sure I can't help in some way?"

She smiled as she straightened a pile of paperwork.

"Positive! Enjoy a day off!"

I shook my head and smiled.

"You're giving me a run for my bits. I doubt you really need me around anymore."

"Not true! You're one of my friends. I'll always need my friends."

"Well if you don't need me immediately, I suppose I'll head home."

I turned to leave.

"Actually, you just reminded me of something!"

I looked over my shoulder.

"Oh?"

"I have a student you should meet. Her name is Ocellus."

My brow arched.

"The young changeling in your class?"

She nodded.

"I just received a letter from her family. They'd like her to come back home for something called a Naming."

I spun back around.

"A Naming?! The changelings haven't held an official Naming in nearly a century!"

"That's what the letter said. I suppose that's something Chrysalis abolished?"

I nodded.

"It used to be that changelings would hold a Naming to welcome the newest member of the hive."

"Well that's exciting, isn't it?"

"Very!"

"Then can I count on you to take Ocellus home for the event?"

I nearly fell over.

"Me?! Go back to the hive?!"

"I think it would be a good experience for you. Especially after everything."

I thought about it for a few moments. Maybe she was right. It must look so different now...

"Okay."

"Excellent! I'll introduce you two today and you can leave tomorrow."

"So soon?"

"The Naming is the day after tomorrow. I've already arranged a balloon."

I narrowed my eyes.

"if you have a balloon already, why do I need to go?"

She grinned.

"Adult supervision?"

I shook my head and chuckled.

"Keep it up. You'll be on Celestia's level of bullshitting in no time."

The balloon started to descend. I looked down at the hive. It looked so green now!

"Is that really it?"

Ocellus peeked over the basket and smiled.

"Yep! Isn't it pretty?"

"I never thought I'd see things growing here."

"How long has it been since you've been back?"

I stepped back and mulled it over.

"I guess it's been a little over five years now."

"Wow. I don't know if I could ever be away from my home for that long."

I smiled.

"Ponyville is more home to me now."

"Will you know anyone here?"

"I know Thorax. But I doubt I remember many changelings by name."

"I'll introduce you if you want!"

I smiled at the young changeling. She was usually so timid from what I'd heard. But being back in familiar surroundings seemed to let her open up more. Hopefully I'd have a similar reaction.

"Maybe one I've had a chance to look around."

The balloon touched down and Ocellus flew out of the basket, racing for the hive. I saw her tackle a couple of grown changelings with a hug.

I hopped out of the basket with a sigh.

"Here goes nothing."

"Shade!"

I looked up to see Thorax flying towards me. He landed a few steps away, but quickly approached and pulled me into a hug.

"Twilight told me you were coming! I was so excited!"

I returned the hug.

"It's been too long Thorax."

He pulled away, his face beaming.

"Can you believe it? A Naming! I've never seen one in my lifetime."

I chuckled.

"There's only been one in my lifetime. Until now that is."

Thorax got excited.

"Do you remember it well enough? I'd love to know if we've got it right."

I began walking with him towards the hive.

"I'm sure you'll do fine. I'm just happy to be a part of the festivities."

I glanced at him.

"I can't wait to see the bug-bear fights."

Thorax tripped over his own hooves.

"The...WHAT?!"

I couldn't hold it together as I began laughing.

"I'm...I'm sorry! I couldn't help myself!"

Thorax let out a sigh of relief.

"Don't joke like that. We've been working so hard on this."

We arrived at the hive entrance and were greeted by another changeling. He was a much darker hue than I expected. He marched up to me and looked down.

"State your name and purpose here."

I looked at Thorax. He was covering his face and groaning.

"Pharynx..."

I looked up at the changeling and smiled.

"Uh...Shade. I'm here for the Naming."

Thorax chimed in.

"He's my guest Pharynx. You don't need to check everyone that comes in."

"But he's a pony. Namings are a changeling tradition. We've never had outsiders at them before."

I cleared my throat and Pharynx turned back to me. I smiled as my changeling magic kicked in, transforming me to how I looked before the Invasion.

"Does this help?"

Pharynx backed up, his eyes growing bigger.

"You!"

I transformed back and walked past Pharynx.

"At ease soldier. It's peacetime. Let's enjoy the party."

Thorax raced after me.

"I've never seen Pharynx so surprised before!"

I chuckled.

"I doubt he'll be the only one today."

We entered the main area of the hive. Changelings were everywhere, talking and laughing. I'd never seen the hive look so lively!

As we entered, changelings began looking at me. I didn't want to keep transforming, so I began letting the aura of my changeling magic feed out into the crowd. It didn't take long for the whispering to start.

Thorax moved to the middle of the crowd.

"I'm sure you all know by now who I've invited to the Naming."

I joined him in the center, my nerves beginning to stretch thin.

"Uh...hi everyone. My name is Shade."

Silence. My anxiety shot up tenfold. They hated me. They didn't want-

The crowd surged around me as changelings began introducing themselves. Many of them asked if I remembered them. I never got the chance to answer as one changeling would be replaced by another.

They were happy to see me.

The crowd receded slowly, and Thorax approached me again.

"Everyone missed you brother. Welcome back."

I looked around at the smiling faces, feeling my anxiety begin to lessen.

"So...When does the party start?"

I had to cover my ears, the cheers threatening to make them deaf.

Everyone sat around in groups eating a feast. I was sitting with Thorax and Pharynx off to the side. Thorax nudged me.

"So? How did it compare?"

I chuckled.

"Far better than the last one."

Pharynx looked at me.

"You remember the last Naming?"

I looked down at the floor.

"Of course I do. It was mine."

Thorax dropped the fruit he'd picked up.

"Yours?! I thought Chry-"

He cut himself, lowering his volume.

"I thought Chrysalis didn't give anyof her children names."

I shook my head.

"Only me. I was the firstborn after all. I think she did it for tradition's sake. She never called me by it anyway."

Pharynx leaned closer.

"So, what's your real name?"

I locked eyes with him.

"Of all the things I lost in the Everfree Forest, that's one thing I don't regret. My name is Shade. And it always will be."

Pharynx sat back, unsatisfied. Thorax smiled and passed me some fruit.

"Well we're glad to have you Shade. All of us."

I smiled, accepting the fruit. I looked around the hive. It was bright and colorful, full of happy changelings. If I didn't already have a wonderful place to call home, this wouldn't have been a bad choice.

I bit into the fruit and settled in as Thorax began telling us about an adventure he'd had in the Crystal Empire. I didn't know when I'd make it back here, so I planned on taking in as much as possible of my old home.

Hearts And Hooves Day

I walked into the school, instantly enveloped by the hustle and bustle of the students. Decorations were going up everywhere, the shades of red and pink filling my vision. Hearts and Hooves Day was upon us!

I made my way towards Rarity's classroom, eager to share my holiday plans with her.

Turning the corner, I ran face-first into Rainbow Dash. We both cried out in shock and pain as we collided. Rainbow glared at me.

"Geez Shade! Is your head made of stone? That seriously hurt!"

I rubbed my nose.

"My head? Yours felt like ramming into a brick wall."

We each took a few seconds to recover. I shook my head to clear it.

"Sorry about that. I'm just heading for Rarity's room."

"I guessed as much. I'm sorry too."

"I'm honestly surprised to see you on the ground for once."

She chuckled, putting on a big grin.

"Well...sometimes it's nice to walk."

That was the worst cover-up I'd ever heard. I shrugged.

"Everypony is so used to seeing you fly around these halls. I suppose you might go...unnoticed...if you were walking."

She was beginning to crack.

"Hehe...why would I need to hide? I'm not hiding anything."

"I never said you were! I'll just continue on my way. And if anypony asks, I never saw you."

I stepped around her and noticed a card on the ground. I picked it up and cleared my throat.

"Is this yours?"

Her eyes bulged.

"Horsefeathers!!"

She swiped the card and tucked it under her wing.

"You didn't- Did you- It's not-"

I held up a hoof to silence her.

"I don't know anything. Even if I do, I don't."

She still seemed nervous. I put a hoof on her shoulder and smiled.

"Good luck Rainbow."

Without another word, I turned back in the right direction and continued towards Rarity's room. I glanced over my shoulder to see Rainbow brushing off her wings, checking them over for rogue feathers. I couldn't help but chuckle.

"Who knew she cared that much about appearance?"

I reached the door to the classroom and walked in.

The decorations overwhelmed me. Rarity had covered everything with hearts.

"Sweet Celestia! Is there any classroom left?"

Rarity appeared from behind a large heart near the front of the room. She beamed as she saw me.

"Well I might have overdone the decor. I just love this holiday so much!"

I smiled.

"So you've told me. That's why I want to make this one perfect."

"It doesn't have to be perfect Shade. I'm just so happy we finally get to spend it together! We've been together for nearly three years now and this is the first time we're really celebrating our relationship."

I walked over and pulled her into a hug.

"Which is why it should be perfect. Our lives have been far too crazy to this point. I just want to relax and spend the day with you."

She pulled back enough to give me a quick kiss.

"That sounds lovely darling, but I do still have to hold my class."

"You girls really need to get substitutes at this school."

She giggled and broke out of my grip.

"If you want to spend some time together, why don't you stay and help with my class?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Uh-huh. Good one."

"I'm serious! I'm doing a lesson around the holiday. If the hearts didn't give it away."

I looked around the room.

"I see that, but I don't think I'd be good at teaching."

"I think you'd be perfect for this subject! Generosity and love fit perfectly together! And who'd be a better teacher on the aspects of love than a former changeling?"

I glanced at her.

"You really want me to help out?"

She nodded enthusiastically. I sighed.

"Okay."

"Splendid! Class starts in fifteen minutes."

"That's not much time to prepare. Do you have a lesson plan, or something written down?"

"Oh, I don't bother with those. I go with my gut with what I feel I need to teach."

"So...I'm going into this blind?"

Her grin went from enthusiastic to sheepish.

"I suppose you are. Sorry."

I chuckled.

"You're the only one that could get me to improvise something like this. You know it's going to be trainwreck, right?"

She pulled me into a brief hug.

"Don't doubt your ability dear. You'll do just fine."

We broke apart as the classroom door opened, revealing the first of the students. It was Gallus and Smolder. Gallus looked between the two of us.

"Uh...did we interrupt something?"

Rarity brushed her mane back and laughed.

"Of course not Gallus! Don't be so silly!"

Smolder rolled her eyes at Gallus.

"It's none of our business what she does with her boyfriend."

Rarity blushed. I couldn't help but laugh.

"I guess we haven't exactly been discreet, huh?"

Smolder tapped her nose.

"Your scent is in this room pretty often. So yeah, not discreet at all."

Now it was my turn to turn red. Smolder chuckled.

"Don't worry. Everyone smells to a dragon. We have a pretty insane sense of smell."

They took their seats as more students appeared. Rarity recomposed herself and walked to the front of the room. I followed her and sat down a few steps behind her.

When everyone was settled, Rarity began.

"Welcome everyone! I hope you're all excited for a special lesson today!"

Yona raised her hoof.

"Miss Rarity? Why ponies put pink everywhere?"

Rarity turned to the young yak.

"It's decoration for one of our holidays Yona. Hearts and Hooves Day. A day when we celebrate the love we feel for our friends and loved ones."

Silverstream raised her claw.

"Is that why your boyfriend is here?"

The students began giggling. I glanced at Rarity, expecting her to be blushing. Surprisingly, she was keeping her composure.

"That's part of the reason, yes. I thought it might be nice for all of you to hear about love from a different perspective other than my own. So, will you all welcome our guest?"

Hooves and claws clapped as I stood up. Rarity took a step back, allowing me to take center stage. I cleared my throat and smiled.

"Hello everyone. My name is Shade. And as you all seem to know already, I'm dating Miss Rarity."

Yona raised a hoof. I looked at her and nodded.

"Yes Yona?"

"Why Shade not look like other ponies?"

Sandbar leaned over to her and whispered.

"That's not really polite Yona."

Gallus raised a claw.

"Actually, I think a lot of us are wondering the same thing."

More students began nodding. I heard Rarity stand up and come forward.

"Now you should all know better than to judge others by how they look."

I smiled and put a hoof on her shoulder.

"They're not judging Rare. They're curious. They probably want to know how I was able to trick such an attractive mare into dating me."

Smolder nodded.

"I know I was."

Rarity gave a warning look to Smolder and then turned back to me.

"Are you comfortable with sharing?"

"Of course. I have nothing to hide. Not anymore."

She nodded and stepped back.

"To answer the first question, I don't look like other ponies because I wasn't always a pony. I used to be a changeling."

The students gasped. Silverstream turned to Ocellus.

"Did you hear that?"

Ocellus smiled.

"I already knew that."

"And you never thought to tell us?!"

I cleared my throat, bringing the attention back to me.

"I'm sure there's plenty of question about that, but why don't I tell you a bit about me first before we go into a Q&A."

I sat down and took a deep breath.

"I used to be the top lieutenant under Chrysalis. But after the changelings got ejected from Canterlot, I wound up lost in the Everfree Forest. I was stuck in there for a long time. I nearly died. But I was saved by Twilight and her friends. Your teachers all showed me that there was a lot more to life. I guess you could say I was one of their first students. Unofficially of course."

Smolder raised a claw and I nodded to her.

"Smolder?"

"So, you never went back home?"

I shook my head.

"Not until recently."

"Even when the changelings threw Chrysalis out?"

"I was pretty settled into my life by that point. I was happy of course, but it wasn't my concern anymore. I've spent the last few years growing as an individual. And learning what it means to give love rather than take it."

Gallus interrupted.

"So, shouldn't you look like Ocellus then?"

I shook my head.

"I'm afraid I missed that train. It's a bit complicated to explain."

"How Shade a pony now?"

I turned to Yona.

"Have you all read about Discord?"

There were some worried looks in the room. Some students looked around as if he were about to appear. I prayed that he wouldn't.

"I'll take that as a yes. He made me what I am now. And I've come to terms with it. Besides, it's not too horrible to be a pony."

Rarity shoved me from behind.

"Keep going and see if this horrible pony will ever kiss you again."

The students all snickered. I chuckled.

"Okay. I deserved that. Yes Silverstream?"

Silverstream lowered her claw.

"How did you two meet?"

"When I first came to Ponyville. We talked every so often. And she had me help her with her work. Along the way I suppose we realized that we liked each other."

Rarity sighed.

"A little lacking in detail, but a decent summary."

Silverstream looked at Rarity.

"Tell us more!"

Rarity smiled.

"I don't know. I think Shade summed it up well."

Disappointed eyes filled the group. Rarity sighed.

"Very well."

She moved over next to me and sat down.

"You all know I make my living as a clothing designer, but a lot of that clothing is usually for mares. Shade has a similar shape to most stallions, which gave me the opportunity to use him as a model. How many outfits would you say you tried on that first week."

I chuckled.

"At least twenty."

Gallus groaned.

"Ugh. I couldn't do that."

I glanced at him.

"You will when you find a girl you fancy. From the first moment I saw her, I wanted to get to know her better. It wasn't until later that I realized that what I felt was a crush."

Silverstream squealed.

"That's so cute!"

I smiled.

"I was so used to taking love that it never occurred to me that love might be freely given to me. And to discover I was capable of giving love myself? That opened my eyes to just how much I'd been missing out on my whole life. Love is an important part of life. So why not have a day to celebrate the love in your life?"

I grabbed Rarity's hoof and smiled at her. She returned the smile as the class gave a collective 'Awww'.

We entered the boutique, both letting out a sigh. I turned to Rarity.

"I hope you're not too tired for dinner. I plan on making you a three-course meal."

"When did you learn to cook?"

"I've been practicing! That's what I was coming to tell you at the school today before you roped me into your lesson."

"You were wonderful by the way."

"Really?"

"Yes!"

She came in close.

"You deserve a reward for being such a good teacher."

I smiled as our lips connected. We stood there kissing for several seconds.

"Umm...Rarity?"

We froze, slowly turning to the front door. Rarity quickly jumped away from me.

"Sweetie Belle! What are you doing here?"

She sighed.

"You forgot, didn't you?"

"Forgot? Oh! Of course not!"

She turned back to me and whispered.

"I completely forgot about this."

Sweetie Belle chimed in.

"I told Mom and Dad you probably forgot. But they didn't believe me."

Rarity turned back to Sweetie.

"I'm so sorry darling! I made that promise months ago. I wasn't sure if Shade would be in town."

She looked at me again.

"My parents asked me to watch her so they could spend some time together for the holiday. But I wasn't sure what your schedule would be like."

Sweetie looked bummed. I smiled and stepped around Rarity.

"You know, I'm about to cook up dinner. Do you want to help me out? I'm still not used to the setup of this kitchen."

Sweetie beamed.

"Really?"

I looked back at Rarity.

"I know we were hoping for an evening alone, but where is she going to go?"

Rarity pouted for a moment before nodding.

"Alright."

Sweetie jumped up and down.

"Yay! I promise I'll be good. You won't even know I'm here!"

I chuckled.

"I don't know if I believe that last part."

She bounced into the kitchen with me following behind. I glanced back at Rarity. She mouthed 'thank you' as I disappeared from view.

The three of us sat at the table, enjoying the fruits of our labor.

Sweetie smiled as she swallowed her latest bite.

"Mmm! This is so good!"

"Well I couldn't have done it without you."

Rarity sat back and sighed.

"Where did you learn to cook like that?"

"Butter Whisk, the head chef at the castle. I spent my lunches practicing with him."

Sweetie Belle sat up, her eyes lighting up.

"The castle?! In Canterlot?!"

I looked at Rarity.

"You never mentioned where I work?"

"It never came up."

Sweetie huffed at her sister.

"She never talks about you. Not in front of Mom and Dad anyway."

I turned toward Rarity.

"Do your parents...know about me?"

She shrunk back a little.

"Well...they know I'm dating somepony. They just don't know who."

I sat back.

"I don't understand."

Rarity sighed.

"It's...difficult telling my parents things about my life. They're so different compared to me. They're not into fashion or the finer things in life. Not to mention they're oblivious to anything involving Canterlot unless it's the royalty."

Sweetie chimed in.

"She thinks they're not as cultured as her. So why bother telling them about her oh so very cultured life?"

"Sweetie!"

I shook my head.

"That still doesn't explain it."

Rarity blushed.

"Well...the truth is...they don't know you're living with me."

I arched my brow.

"Is that...a big deal?"

She nodded toward Sweetie Belle. I glanced over to see a look of shock on her sister's face.

"You're living together? I thought only married ponies did that!"

I was starting to understand.

"Ah. So, it's not exactly the norm?"

Rarity nodded.

"You see my dilemma?"

"Sort of. I'm still catching up on social norms."

Rarity seemed unconvinced.

"After all this time?"

"Well there's an awful lot I'm apparently supposed to know without being told. How am I supposed to learn it if it's not told to me or written down somewhere?"

We were both startled as Sweetie Belle jumped up suddenly. Her eyes were big as she stared past us.

"You'd better figure out what to say. Mom and Dad are coming!"

We spun around, spying the two ponies making their way towards the boutique.

Rarity began panicking.

"What are they doing here?! I would have thought they'd spend the whole evening together! What are we going to do? What am I going to say?! What if-"

I put a hoof over her mouth.

"Take a deep breath Rare."

She inhaled and exhaled. I removed my hoof and nodded.

"Better. Why don't you just introduce me, and we'll go from there. The subject of living arrangements doesn't even have to come up."

I looked at Sweetie Belle.

"Right?"

The young filly shook her head.

"Nope. Not at all."

"Okay. Then it's settled."

There was a knock at the door. Rarity gasped.

"I'm not ready!"

I chuckled.

"Will you ever be?"

She looked at me and sighed.

"I suppose I can't avoid it forever. Wait here for a minute before coming out."

She left the kitchen, leaving me and Sweetie. Sweetie looked up at me.

"Are you nervous?"

I summoned some of my anxiety medication, swallowing it fast.

"Terrified. But don't tell your sister that."

I sat there, waiting to emerge, unsure of how Rarity's parents would react to me.

"All I wanted to do was have a relaxing day."

Sweetie giggled.

"You're dating my sister. There's no such thing."

I groaned as she walked out of the kitchen, still giggling. What a Hearts and Hooves Day this turned out to be. I could hear their father as Sweetie entered.

“There’s my girl! And my other girl!”

I peeked out from the kitchen and saw their parents. Sweetie was embracing her father. He seemed to have pulled Rarity into the hug as well, though against her will. She was smiling awkwardly.

“You didn’t have to come pick Sweetie up. I could have brought her.”

Her mother smiled.

“Oh we know! But your father and I were going to go for ice cream! We thought we’d invite you along.”

Sweetie broke away from her father and smiled.

“Yay! Did you hear that Shade?”

My ears flattened and my legs froze. Rarity hid her face in her hoof. And the parents noticed the stallion peeking out of the kitchen. Their mother tapped Rarity on the shoulder.

“Rarity? Is this the fella you've been hiding?”

Her father’s eyes narrowed as they locked on me. I looked to Rarity, wondering what the next move was. She spoke after a few seconds.

“Well...Yes! It is! This is my boyfriend Shade. Shade, these are my parents.”

I tried to step into the room, but was blocked as her parents ambushed me!

“Great to meet ya!”

“I’m Cookie Crumbles. This is my husband Hondo Flanks.”

“You can call me Magnum!”

“Nopony calls him that except me.”

I shook both their hooves and smiled.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you both. I’ve heard great things.”

Cookie Crumbles backed up.

“And yet we’ve heard nothing about you! Rarity, honey, why didn’t you tell us!”

Her hoof was hiding her face again.

“Must have slipped my mind.”

Magnum looked me over.

“You gotta good build to ya."

Cookie lifted one of my hooves.

“He’s got muscle! I see why you like him Rarity.”

“Mother, please..”

Magnum patted my back.

“You comin’ for ice cream Shade? It’s on us!”

“I’d love to.”

With that I was escorted out the door. I looked back at Rarity. She watched in embarrassment as her parents dragged me away.

——————————

I had never been to the ice cream shop before. This was exciting! We all sat at s table together, waiting for our order. Cookie was telling us a story about Rarity as a filly.

“And that’s when she found out it wasn’t candy!”

We all laughed. Except for Rarity. She moaned and hid herself under her hooves. I put my hoof around her.

“Come on Rare. Don’t be embarrassed. This is fun!”

She mumbled through her legs.

“Easy for you to say.”

A pony appeared with a tray of ice cream. She dished each bowl out to us. I’d gotten a hot fudge sundae on Cookie’s recommendation. I picked up my spoon and scooped up the first bite, making sure to get a good amount of fudge. I fed it into my mouth and let it sit for a moment. It was hot and cold! Sweet Celestia it was good!
Magnum watched Rarity play with her bowl.

“Oh come on honey. We don’t mean any harm. We’re just excited you got yerself a fella!”

Cookie nodded.

“We are! And he’s such a gentleman too.”

Rarity smiled.

“He is, isn’t he? It’s the first thing that attracted me to him.”

My brow arched.

“Really?”

Her mother stared at us and smiled.

“You two are so cute together! Aren’t they Magnum?”

“They sure are.”

Sweetie looked up from her bowl.

“Am I the only one that’s finished their ice cream?”

Confronting The Past

I sat at the table, enjoying a cup of tea.

"This is perfect, Fluttershy."

"Oh good! I hoped you'd like it. It's a new kind Discord introduced to me."

I paused mid-sip, staring at the pegasus. She giggled at my hesitance.

"Don't worry. It's perfectly safe."

I finished my sip and put the cup down.

"So, what brought on this invitation?"

Fluttershy walked over to check on some of the animals. Her cottage was unusually light on furry residents at the moment.

"I was giving it some thought, and I wanted to run the idea by you."

Now I was curious.

"What's up?"

She didn't look at me as she passed out some food to her visitors.

"I'll be going to check on the sanctuary soon, but I have to pick up some medicine first. I thought...you might want to come along?"

"Uh...okay. I guess I've never seen the vet's office before, so that could be fun?"

"Well...the medicine isn't from the vet."

I narrowed my eyes.

"Where else could you get..."

I trailed off as she looked at me. She had a small smile and was shrugging her shoulders.

"I just thought...if we went together...well...maybe it wouldn't be so bad?"

I shook my head.

"I don't know Fluttershy."

"I know it holds bad memories for you. Rarity and I thought it might be...therapeutic."

Of course, Rarity was involved.

"Fluttershy...I haven't gone near the forest in years. I...I don't know if I can..."

Her smile grew as she approached me.

"Could you do it if I were with you? And we're not going far. Just to Zecora's."

I stared at the pegasus, her smile boring into my heart.

"Well...when were you planning on going?"

"In a few minutes."

"Geez. You don't waste any time."

"Well, Rarity knew if we delayed, you'd find an excuse."

I groaned.

"She knows me too well. Okay! I'll go."

"Oh good! I'm so happy I get to help you with this."

I summoned one of my pills, swallowing it with another sip of tea.

"Yeah. What could go wrong?"

Fluttershy grabbed her saddlebag and hoisted it onto her back.

"Are you ready?"

I slowly stood up.

"As ready as I can be, I suppose."

She smiled and opened the door, letting me walk out first. We followed the path towards the forest, the trees growing closer with each step. I felt my heart picking up its pace.

"Deep breaths. You can do this."

Fluttershy glanced at me.

"It'll be okay Shade. I don't especially like going in the forest either, but sometimes you have to do things you don't like for something more important."

"Like this medicine?"

"Yes! I have a young bear cub dealing with an infection. Zecora's made a potion that should help clear it up by tomorrow. I could try something more conventional, but it might take too long to help the cub heal. The infection could spread if it's not taken care of quickly."

"So, your desire to help your animals outweighs your fear of the forest."

She nodded.

"I know you don't have much of a reason to go in yourself, but today you do."

"And what's that?"

"Protecting me and Angel Bunny."

I looked at her saddlebag and discovered the bunny riding along. How did I miss that?

"Well...I guess I wouldn't want either of you to get hurt."

She smiled as we approached the treeline. I stopped at the edge of the shadows, staring into the forest.

"Fluttershy-"

I stopped as I felt her hoof on my shoulder.

"You can do it."

I took a deep breath and set a hoof into the outstretched shadows.

Nothing happened.

I took another step. And another. Fluttershy stayed by my side as I slowly moved closer to the trees. I couldn't help but look up as the canopy began to stretch over my head. My heart skipped a beat as the sunlight broke up into fragments through the leaves.

"I...I..."

"It's okay. I'm right here."

I looked around as the forest surrounded us. The shadows were black as night. My mind raced, thinking of what could be lurking there.

And then something clicked in my head.

I reached within myself and pulled my fragment of dark magic forward. I didn't allow myself to turn into a shadow, but I let my aura emanate from me. The bushes rustled slightly, signaling the retreat of some small creatures. Fluttershy looked at me.

"Are...are you doing something?"

I realized my error. Nopony besides Rarity and Twilight really knew what I'd gone through. Or the power I'd gained from my trials. I slowly turned to Fluttershy.

"What's wrong?"

"I...I feel cold. Or like something...bad is going to happen."

I had nearly forgotten how much discomfort dark magic caused. I reigned my power in bit by bit.

"I'm sorry. I think my defenses are a little too on edge. I'm probably putting off all sorts of negative energy."

She nodded.

"I understand. I can't imagine what's going through your head right now. But we'll be safe if we stay on the path."

I pulled back a little more and I could see her visibly relax.

"See? It's not so bad, right?"

"Right..."

She led the way as we moved further into the forest. I kept my eye on the trees and bushes, flinching whenever I heard something. I muttered under my breath.

"Not so bad. Yeah, right."

We curved around a large bush and Zecora's place came into sight. I'd never gotten a good look at it before. It was the thickest tree in this part of the forest by far. Zecora had decorated it with masks and symbols of her homeland. It was quite the sight.

Fluttershy moved to the door while I looked around the clearing. There were so many noises around us. Most of them sounded like small enough creatures, but that didn't help set my fears to rest. And there was something else... I couldn't put my hoof on it, but something was off. I heard Zecora answer the door behind me.

"Hello dear Fluttershy, is that Shade I spy?"

I turned around and waved.

"Good to see you Zecora."

Fluttershy nodded to the door.

"Aren't you coming in?"

I looked around the clearing again, my curiosity and fear growing together. I recognized this feeling...

"I think...I'd prefer to stay out here... Keep a lookout, you know?"

"Are you sure? It might be a minute."

I nodded and waved her off.

"Go on. I'll be fine. Just...not too long?"

She smiled and nodded, following Zecora inside. The door shut behind them and I returned my gaze to the forest.

"Something's out there..."

I still hadn't gotten used to how fast I could move in my shadow form. I was flying through the forest. I had panicked for a brief moment, worried of what I would run into. Then again, I was a shadow. What could anything do to me when I was like this?

I began to feel my fear ebb away. Nothing could hurt me here anymore. I slowed down to check my bearing. I could feel the aura now. It was deep in the heart of the Everfree Forest. I moved forward again, determined to find my target. How far had I come? Would I be able to find Zecora's again? I pushed these thoughts to the back of my mind. There were more pressing matters at hoof.

I came to a halt, floating between the trees. I had prayed I was wrong. A voice was carrying through this patch of the forest.

"Idiots! Fools! I will have my revenge at all costs! I will take back my throne. And no one can stand in my way!"

I felt a shiver pass through me. What was she doing here? I moved forward, staying away from any sunlight. I couldn't risk being seen. Not yet anyway. I peered around a tree, confirming my fear.

Chrysalis.

I took the whole picture in. She looked thinner than the last time I’d seen her. Her wings looked ragged. Even her eyes seemed more sunken in than usual. She'd become a shell of her former self. She was standing in a small clearing. Sunlight was scarce, but there was enough to see her. I looked around the clearing, noticing carvings in the trees around her. The carvings looked like changelings. And she was pacing around to each of them.

"You'll all see! I will destroy Twilight and her friends. Especially that wretched Starlight!"

I couldn't believe my eyes. She'd gone crazy.

I wanted to run. Twilight and the others should know about this, right? But the longer I watched her, the more I felt old anger returning. Why waste the chance?

"Maybe my last plan didn't work, but only because those stupid clones thought they could overthrow me! Fools! Next time I'll take care of those ponies myself."

I moved forward, skirting the clearing. When would I get this opportunity again?

"How sad. Look what's become of you."

Chrysalis whipped around.

"Who's there?! Show yourself!!"

I chuckled.

"Don't you recognize me? Then again, it's been years since you last saw me."

Her eyes searched the trees.

"What sort of coward hides from his enemy?"

I laughed.

"Big words from the changeling in the woods."

"Show yourself coward!!"

"There's nothing to show...Mother."

She seemed confused for a moment. And then her eyes grew bigger.

"It...It can't be. You're supposed to be dead!"

"Am I not? It certainly feels like I died here."

She began running around the clearing.

"You can't have survived in this forest all this time. You would have starved!"

"Oh yes, I starved. I was broken and weak. And alone."

Her eyes began to sparkle. What was she thinking?

"You're not alone anymore. You have me! Help me return to my throne. You wouldn't leave your queen to live like this, would you?"

I sighed, moving around the outskirts of the clearing.

"How the mighty have fallen. Do you think I don't know the changelings rose against you? I've heard the stories. I've even seen the hive."

Her eyes began to fill with anger.

"So, you've become one of those weaklings."

I pushed into the clearing, allowing my body to reform. Chrysalis stared at me, her anger wavering into fear for a moment.

"What...what are you?"

I smiled.

"I'm certainly not yours anymore. Then again, did you ever really consider me yours?"

The fear disappeared and she scowled.

"This again? You could never stop complaining about your position."

I felt my heart contort slightly, hurt by the remark.

"Position? I'm your son!"

"I have hundreds of children! You're no different from the rest!"

"Maybe I wasn't. But I am now. I'm not some common changeling anymore. I've been through death and darkness to get where I am. I'm stronger than I ever was. And I did it without you."

She sneered.

"What nonsense is this?"

I didn't even think as I allowed my dark magic to emanate around me. The forest grew silent as creatures ran away. Chrysalis looked around the clearing.

"What is this magic?"

I reached out with a tendril of magic, touching a nearby tree. It began to wither and turn grey.

"I've fought against darker powers than yours. I've seen greater horrors. If you could feel a fraction of the pain I've endured, you would scream in agony."

The tree began to crack. The trunk gave, tipping the body over into the clearing. Chrysalis jumped back to avoid the deceased tree. Her eyes quickly found me again.

"How can you have such power?"

My vision clouded slightly as a green hue enveloped everything. I couldn't help but smile.

"I looked into the darkness and took what power it held over me. It's mine to control now. I will never again bow to the likes of you. And you will never rule over anyone. You will die in this forest, lost to time."

I took a step forward. It brought me far too much pleasure to see her take a step back as her eyes filled with fear again.

"Stay away! You can't kill me!"

I let out a laugh. It didn't sound like me. It sounded like something else. My voice had taken on a deeper, more sinister cadence.

"Kill you? I don't want to kill you. I mean to leave you here to rot like this tree!"

Her eyes darted to the dead tree in front of her.

"You...you can't! I'm your queen! I'm...your mother!"

My eyes narrowed.

"You were never a mother to me."

I felt my anger building. A part of me actually wanted to kill her. Where was these feelings coming from?

Chrysalis took another step back and tripped on a rock. She fell over with a cry of pain.

As I moved closer, she looked up at me. Her eyes were filled with fear.

"Please...Varus..."

I froze. The magic began to recede into me. My vision cleared as I stared at the creature in front of me. I hadn't noticed before, but I'd apparently been blocking out the light from the clearing. Sunlight began to dance on the forest floor again. There were even a few birds chirping again. I looked down at Chrysalis.

"I'm surprised you even remember that name."

I didn't give her the chance to respond. I let my body dissolve and flew at top speed back towards Zecora's.

In a matter of minutes, I found myself back where I started. I reformed and walked into the clearing just as Fluttershy emerged through the doorway.

"There you are! I couldn't see you out the window."

She looked where I was coming from, her eyes growing bigger.

"Did you wander off into the forest?!"

I nodded, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah. Not far. I just thought I should try something."

She approached me.

"And?"

I smiled.

"You're right. It's not so bad here."

She smiled back.

"I'm so glad to hear you say that!"

We began walking along the path towards her sanctuary. Fluttershy started talking about what she and Zecora had been discussing. I didn't really catch much of it though. My mind was filled with thoughts of what had just happened. I'd wanted to kill Chrysalis. I'd never felt that sort of hatred before. And the power behind my magic...

I felt a shiver run down my spine as I connected the dots. It seemed I had inherited more than just some of Sombra's magic. And I couldn't allow him to get the better of me ever again. I'd even stop using dark magic all together if it meant I could keep that part from taking over like it did.

I looked around the forest, realizing that the things in the shadows probably feared me more than I did them. Somehow that was comforting. I let out a sigh as we came to the border of the forest. I basked in the sunlight, feeling warm for the first time that day. I wouldn't let what happened hinder me. I would move forward. Everfree was nothing to me now. And I would never feel threatened by Chrysalis again. I was finally free of my past.

I was finally free to live.

End Of An Era

I looked over my notes again.

"That's really it, isn't it?"

I perused the scroll a few more times for safety.

"Shit. Why do I always have to be right?"

I rolled up the scroll and sighed.

"Well, might as well ask her myself."

I left my study and made my way toward Celestia's. A momentary pause at the door told me she was in there. I didn't bother knocking.

"Can I talk to you?"

Celestia looked up from her desk.

"Come in. The door is open."

"Is he always so rude during the day?"

I paused as I spotted Luna by a bookshelf.

"Good. You're both here. We need to talk."

Luna groaned.

"I swear it wasn't me."

I arched my brow.

"What did you do?"

She blushed.

"Nothing."

She quickly sat down next to her sister. Celestia smiled and turned back to me.

"What is it Shade?"

"Well...I've noticed a pattern in the paperwork. Something that’s been going on for a while."

Neither of them reacted. I took a breath and continued.

"It's taken me the better part of a month to connect the dots, which assures me nopony else has noticed. But I figured I should just ask you if my assumption was correct."

Celestia smiled.

"And your assumption?"

I looked between the two of them for a second. They seemed so relaxed. Far more than usual. That's when I knew I was right. I let out a long sigh.

"You're going to step down."

Celestia nodded.

"It's our time. Equestria is safe and Twilight is more than ready."

I sat down, letting it sink in.

"You really mean it. Part of me had hoped I was wrong."

Luna smiled.

"You know we're not dying, right? We're just retiring."

"What are you going to do?"

Celestia stood up, coming around her desk.

"We settled on Silver Shoals. A little peace and quiet without our responsibilities sounds heavenly."

Luna came around as well.

"We might do some traveling. See the world."

I smiled.

"That sounds nice for you. When do you plan on revealing all of this to Twilight?"

Celestia thought for a moment.

"There's still a few things we need to square away in the paperwork, but I'd say soon. Maybe a week or two?"

I glanced up at her.

"You know, this paper trail seemed to start shortly after you took me on."

She tried to act surprised.

"Oh really?"

I glanced at Luna. She had a sheepish grin. My gaze returned to Celestia.

"So, this has been in the works for a while then."

Celestia nodded.

"I don't think we could have done this without your help. We wanted to make the transition as seamless as possible. That required a lot of small changes. But with you taking over some of our duties and helping expedite paperwork, it made our job a lot smoother than it would have been if you weren't here."

I couldn't help but smile.

"You used me."

Luna chuckled.

"Maybe a little. But we also saw the potential you had. We've watched you grow and become one of the finest ponies we know. And one of our closest friends."

Celestia nodded.

"I don't think we can ever thank you enough for the friendship you've given us."

I sighed.

"So...Twilight huh?"

"And her friends."

"That's a big responsibility."

"You don't think they can handle it?"

"On the contrary. I know they can."

Luna smiled.

"And they'll have you to help them out."

My smile began to fade.

"There's actually something I've been wanting to discuss with you."

The sisters looked at each other, concern in their eyes. Celestia turned back to me.

"You don't mean..."

I nodded.

"Recent events in my life have shown me that I need to step back from everything. At least from my position."

Luna leaned closer.

"Recent events?"

I looked between the two of them, debating on how much to tell them. I took a deep breath and proceeded with caution.

"I...had an episode with my dark magic. And it went south very quickly. Nopony was around to get hurt luckily. I don't think Sombra's magic was the only thing I integrated into me."

Celestia and Luna looked at each other again for a few seconds. Celestia took a step back.

"Maybe you should handle this."

She sat back as Luna let out a long sigh.

"I feared that was the case when we first discovered your situation in the Empire. I had just hoped that whatever part of his spirit you'd consumed might remain dormant."

I looked down at the floor.

"I felt like a completely different pony. I was strong, confident... I sucked the life out of a tree. I made the air around me thick with my own magic. It was like I was back in those damn mines. And...I liked it."

I was surprised by Luna pulling me into a hug. I felt her body press into me with such force, I thought I'd suffocate for a second. But as the pressure built, I felt my own defenses fall. The tears began welling up in my eyes.

If anypony could understand what I had been through, it was Luna. She didn't have to say anything. I could feel the strength in her embrace, the slight tremble in her hooves, and the tears falling to my shoulder.

I wrapped my hooves around her and let my tears come.

We stayed like that for a few minutes. Celestia sat to the side, a small smile on her face.

When we finally broke apart, Luna took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry you have this burden, but you're not alone. And if you believe that stepping back is what's best for you, then I wish you luck with whatever the future holds."

Celestia nodded.

"I couldn't have said it better myself."

She gave me a hug, the warmth of her body providing further comfort. As we separated, I began to smile.

"You're not rid of me yet. I'll stay on as long as you two are around. But I do have an idea I want to pursue when the time comes."

Luna smiled.

"What would that be?"

"Historian?"

Celestia chuckled.

"Why am I not surprised? You've always been obsessed with history."

Luna nodded.

"That seems fitting for you. But do you think you have enough to add to the books?"

"I was thinking of compiling the various histories into a comprehensive volume. With a few additions of my own of course. And I'll need to use you two as sources, seeing as you're both older than Equestria itself."

Both gasped from the offence. I didn't have time to jump out of the way as they tackled me.

"Take it back!"

"Never!"

"Luna, tickle him."

"Don't you dare!"

I stepped off the train and made my way to Twilight's castle.

I was surprised to find all the girls there. They greeted me warmly while Rarity pulled me into a hug.

"We didn't expect to see you until tomorrow!"

I hugged her back.

"I wanted to surprise you. Besides, I needed to discuss something with Twilight."

Twilight's ears perked up.

"Are the girls okay to be here?"

I nodded and moved to the table.

"I have some news I wanted to share. I know that most of you won't fully understand my motives, but I think Twilight will."

They all looked at me in confusion. I took a breath and spat it out.

"I'll be stepping down from my position in the near future."

Gasps all around. Even Twilight. The only one who didn't seem surprised was Rarity. I glanced at her and she smiled, giving a small nod. She understood. I focused my attention back on the table as questions began flying.

"You're leaving Canterlot?"

"Don't Celestia and Luna want you there?"

"What are you going to do?"

"Why would you give up a sweet gig like that?"

I looked at Twilight.

"I've already told Celestia and Luna. They agree with my decision. Do you understand my reasoning?"

She slowly nodded and smiled.

"I do. If you're happy with your decision, then I'm happy for you. Though I'll miss having you help with my paperwork."

I chuckled.

"I think you'll manage."

Rainbow Dash rose from her seat.

"So, what are you going to do then?"

I shrugged.

"Move back to Ponyville once I'm done. Relax. Spend more time with all of you. If you don't mind having me around."

Pinkie jumped up.

"Of course we don't mind! You're our friend!"

Twilight nodded as she stood up.

"And you always will be. Maybe you can come help at the school! We could use the extra hooves since the whole Cozy Glow incident."

I nodded.

"I'd be happy to help."

Twilight made her way around the table to me, placing a hoof on my shoulder.

"Whatever comes next, we're always here for you."

She gave me a hug. It didn't take long for the girls to swarm me, locking me in a group hug. I sighed as I let a feeling of contentment wash over me.

Whatever comes next...

It turned out a lot could come next. Celestia and Luna announced their retirement. Everything was gearing up for a big coronation.

Nopony expected Sombra.

I can only assume I avoided his mind control since I hold a part of his soul within me, but that didn't stop me from being completely helpless. I had hidden myself in the boutique, unable to handle the horrible reality that was Sombra's Invasion.

When the forest began attacking, I finally snapped out of it. I left the boutique and found Celestia, Luna, and Star Swirl battling the intruding vines of Everfree. I jumped into battle with them, unwilling to let the forest take my home.

It was the last time I allowed my dark magic to flow through me. I used every drop cutting back the forest. All three of them warned me of overextending myself, but I wanted to ensure I didn't have an ounce of Sombra left in me. And as far as I've been able to tell, it worked.

Even once victory was secured by the girls and Sombra was destroyed once and for all, I didn't sleep for a month.

Celestia and Luna decided to remain in power for a while longer. Nearly a year actually. I helped them go through everything to ensure the transition would be a smooth as they hoped. We even worked on packing up some stuff for their eventual departure.

Rarity and I spent time together where we could, doing our best not to get on each other's nerves the rest of the time. I was ready to retire while she was ramping up her business like never before. We were moving in very different directions workwise. I made sure she knew she had my full support. She was appreciative of that.

"You don't have to help me. You've got your own plans, don't you?"

"Writing a history book can take a backseat for a bit while I help you expand your brand. Besides, you could use somepony like me to keep track of your accounting, right?"

We'd all spent the better part of our time prepping for the transition. The girls worked on coronation plans. And Celestia and Luna made plans for their lives post-retirement. They even took a mini vacation to test the waters.

The biggest hurdle came when Discord revealed his latest blunder. I'd nearly strangled him myself when he mentioned recruiting Chrysalis.

"You pea-brained idiot!! What were you thinking?!"

"Don't chastise me half-breed! Besides, it all worked out, didn't it?"

Luckily, it did work out. Nopony was as happy as I was when watching Chrysalis get turned to stone. It had been a satisfying moment. Another part of my past was safely tucked away.

I stood back as Star Swirl set the statue where Discord had once stood in the gardens. I stared at the three villains, frozen in their stone prison.

"A little to the left. No, too far. Back a little. Turn it to the north slightly. There."

Star Swirl stood back with me and nodded.

"A fitting punishment, don't you think?"

I nodded my agreement.

"Only the finest for Equestria's lowest."

Star Swirl chuckled as he walked away. I remained there, staring at the statue. I was staring at Chrysalis in particular.

I found myself approaching her, getting within a few steps of her face. I found myself surprised as I began speaking to her.

"You know...I thought the last time I saw you would be the last time. But here we are."

I sat down in front of her.

"And now you have to listen to me."

I took a deep breath and continued.

"You know, I once told Celestia I had only one good memory of you. That's still true. I don't know if you remember it, but it's still clear in my mind. It was shortly after I hatched. You..."

I felt a tear roll down my cheek.

"You were holding me against your body. And you were whispering to me. I could actually feel your love for me. Maybe I was the only one who ever received any of that love. But that's the problem."

More tears were coming.

"You had the potential to love. You could have been so different from what you became. And it was that one memory, that one hope that kept me going. I put up with your abuse, hoping you might see the light one day. I let you treat me like dirt because I believed there was a better creature beneath the surface."

I felt my face contort.

"But you couldn't do it, could you? You couldn't give love. All you could do was horde it and keep it for yourself!"

I glared up at her.

"You let us all starve while you knew perfectly well there was another way. I hated you for it. I still hate you for it!"

I looked back down, my eyes clamping shut as the tears kept coming.

"But that fucking memory. I couldn't help but hope that you would change. I wanted you to love me. I wanted you to be my mother."

I wiped the tears away, keeping my gaze down.

"Do you remember what you said to me when I hatched? Do you remember what you were whispering to me? Because of all the things that I have in my head, that's the one piece that's missing. All I know is that it made me feel special. It made me feel like...you loved me. Even with all the evidence to the contrary, I truly believed that, deep down, you loved me."

I turned away, wiping my face again.

"How? How could I believe that you were capable of loving anyone but yourself? Even if you loved me for a moment, you certainly didn't love me long enough to care what happened to me. You left me to die. You let me suffer because I wanted more from you than you were willing to give. And now...now you're paying the price for your cruelty."

I spun around, finally looking at her face again.

"But you know what the worst part of all of this is? I still want that love. I'll be forever haunted by that memory. I'll always wonder what could have been..."

I found myself reaching for her hoof, the stone cold against my own.

"You don't deserve love from me, but there's still a small part that can't help but give it."

A faint shimmer passed over the statue. I looked down at my hoof and found saw a faint glow between it and the stone surface.

Before I knew what was happening, I felt my vision cloud. It was taken over, filling with a new image.

I was in the hive. And sitting in front of me was Chrysalis. She looked young and vibrant. And she was holding a hatchling.

I approached her, realizing she wasn't aware of me. She was rocking the hatchling in her hooves. I looked down at the hatchling, catching my breath.

It was me.

"My sweet Varus."

I looked at Chrysalis. Her eyes were fixed on the infant.

"One day you'll have brothers and sisters, but you'll always be my first child."

I stared at her face. I'd never seen her look like this.

"You are my prince. And one day, you'll rule with me."

I felt tears forming in the corners of my eyes.

My infant form made a noise and I saw love begin to flow between the two of them. After a minute, I saw Chrysalis changing. Her dark skin was turning a brilliant white. As she noticed this, she cut off the flow. Her skin returned to its former shade as my young self cried.

"Shhh. It's okay my darling. I can't give you too much. If I change now, we'll lose everything."

A changeling appeared from an opening in the cave.

"My Queen. The enemy is retreating. The hive is safe."

She snarled at the changeling.

"As it should be! Next time don't lead our enemies to our doorstep you fool!"

She stood and levitated the infant over to the changeling.

"Take him to the nursery. He can stay with the other hatchlings."

"Is that wise? He's your firstborn after all."

"Are you ordering your Queen?"

He shook his head.

"Just a suggestion. He's partly mine as well, isn't he?"

My ears perked up as I took in the changeling before me. Was it really him?

Chrysalis snarled at my father and he retreated. The hole in the wall sealed and she was left alone.

Her snarl disappeared and she began rubbing her skin.

"I'm sorry little one, but I can't love you. There's too much at stake to let love ruin me. I have to remain strong."

I was shocked as I saw a single tear roll down her cheek.

"You'll always be my little Varus."

My vision was suddenly filled by a blinding light.

I blinked several times, discovering I was back in front of the statue. Tears were streaming down my face. As my mind comprehended what it had just seen, my face twisted from the heartache.

Once upon a time, my mother loved me. She loved me so much she had to push me away over what she saw as a weakness. As her thirst for power grew, her contempt for me did too. I was her one weakness. And she had both loved and hated me for it.

I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself down.

"Shade?"

I froze. My head turned enough to spot Rarity behind me.

"I was looking for you. I thought we were going to catch the next train home."

She approached me, her eyes filling with concern.

"What's wrong?"

I shook my head.

"I...I don't think I can talk about it yet."

She looked at the statue, a frown forming on her face.

"You don't deserve his tears."

She looked at me, pulling me into a hug.

"If you ever feel ready to talk, let me know."

I nodded and returned the hug.

"Thank you."

She pulled away and smiled.

"Everything is going to be better now."

I nodded again.

"You're right. But there's one more thing we have to fight through."

She looked puzzled.

"What's left?"

"The coronation."

She smiled and giggled.

"Easy compared to these three brutes."

We turned toward the castle and began walking. I glanced over my shoulder, taking one last look at Chrysalis. There weren't any more words to be said. She'd chosen her fate. And as I looked to Rarity, I knew I'd chosen mine.

I sat at my table, sighing as the festivities wound down.

"Well, here's to retirement."

I clinked cider glasses with Celestia and Luna. I'd been able to procure the proper cider after the fiasco with the applesauce. We all took sips, enjoying the sharp taste of apple.

Celestia set her glass down, letting out a sigh.

"We're finally free."

"After ruling for over a thousand years between the two of you, what are your first plans?"

Luna smiled.

"Silver Shoals. We need to make sure all our things are sorted away. After that, an extended vacation."

Celestia nodded.

"Maybe out of the country. I've heard Abyssinia is lovely this time of year."

I looked over at the table where the girls were sitting. They were at a table right at the front of everything. We'd taken residence at one of the back tables.

"Well you can't go quite yet. You-"

I was interrupted by the sound of boisterous laughter a few tables away.

"Honestly, I don't know why she was chosen. She may have been a student of Celestia's, but she doesn't have the proper bloodline."

I glanced over at the commotion. I rolled my eyes as I found the face of the unwanted commentator.

"Please tell me he's being kicked off the castle grounds today."

Luna leaned over.

"Why do you think he's acting like that? Not to mention the four empty glasses in front of him."

I spotted the glasses and sighed.

"How is that prick of a pony related to you?"

Celestia sighed.

"It's not very direct. We had some cousins growing up who believed in keeping "pure" Unicorn blood within the family. Go forward a thousand years and here we are. He's our....twelfth cousin?"

Luna chimed in.

"Twice removed."

I shook my head.

"That that stallion could share any blood with you is beyond me."

Celestia covered her face.

"I didn't even want to acknowledge him. But his family was so annoying, nagging me constantly. I had to give him a title to shut them up. Not to mention give him the guest house on the grounds."

Another comment drifted over from the table he was sitting at.

"I'll say this much, at least she was a unicorn to begin with. We don't need some earth pony or pegasus sitting on the throne."

I found myself grinding my teeth together. What to do about the party crasher... A smile grew on my face.

"I suppose he's mighty proud of his horn?"

Luna rolled her eyes.

"Don't get him started on that. It's his pride and joy."

I focused my mind, searching for the proper spell. I needed one that would stick long enough. Ah!

I shot a spark out of my horn. It flew over the tables and hit Blueblood. A cloud of smoke enveloped his head, causing him to cough. Everypony at his table gasped as the smoke cleared. Blueblood's horn was limp as a noodle.

"NO!!! My horn!! My beautiful, perfect, gorgeous horn!! Don't look at me!! Don't look!!!"

He got up and ran off into the distance. All three of us were about to fall out of our chairs from laughing so hard. Luna was the first to be able to speak.

"And you call us sadistic?!"

I wiped away my tears.

"I'm sorry! I couldn't help it!"

Celestia sat up.

"Well that should wound his ego for an hour or two."

I couldn't stop laughing.

"That was one of Star Swirl's spells! That horn won't stand up for a month at least!"

It took us several minutes to recompose ourselves. By then the guests were beginning to filter out. Soon the only ponies left were us and the girls at their front table. We saw Twilight join them. Celestia stood up and stretched her legs.

"I think it's time we said our goodbyes."

She and Luna began walking toward the table. They paused when they noticed I wasn't with them. Luna looked back at me.

"Aren't you coming?"

I nodded.

"Yeah. I'll be right behind you."

They continued on as I summoned my surprise. I checked it over, satisfied with the presentation. I looked over to see the sisters arriving at the table.

I trotted over, my heart racing.

All of them were gathering in for a group hug as I stopped nearby. I took a deep breath and moved forward as the hug broke up.

"Did I miss out?"

Rarity turned and smiled.

"Of course not!"

She pulled me into a hug, and I smiled. I looked at Celestia and Luna.

"You two better not go on vacation too quickly."

Celestia cocked her brow, a smile forming.

"And why should we delay our well-deserved break?"

I stepped back from Rarity and held out a ring. Everypony stared in shock. Rarity teared up.

"Yes."

"Wait a minute! Don't you want me to ask?"

She wiped her tears away.

"Do you really want to risk me changing my mind?"

"Good point."

Everypony began cheering. I felt them all close in as another group hug took place.

Rarity leaned in and kissed me. I melted into her hooves, letting our lips press together like never before.

Happily Ever

I walked around the gardens, checking every bow. Everything needed to be perfect today.

The ceremony was set to start in a little over an hour, but it felt like it was ages away. I wasn't sure if I was shaking from nervousness or excitement.

I found myself up at the altar, looking over the seating. Everything was in place. I felt a smile growing on my face.

And then a fog started rolling in. My smile disappeared instantly, replaced by a look of panic.

"No, no, no!! Not today! The pegasi promised a sunny day!"

The temperature dropped rapidly, causing a shiver to run down my spine. What in Tartarus was going on?!

Your time has come.

I froze, looking down the aisle.

A tall, hooded figure stood at the end, a scythe in hand.

Have you made peace?

This couldn't be real, right?

"Wha...what's going on here?"

The figure moved forward, gliding down the aisle.

"I've come for your..."

The figure arrived at the altar, towering over me.

"Bachelorhood!"

I stopped shaking, my panic turning to anger.

"Discord!!"

Discord pulled back the hood.

"Surprise!"

He snapped his claws and the fog rolled away. He snapped again and his cloak turned into a tuxedo.

"Much better. Cloaks are so last century."

I took a deep breath, trying to calm my heart.

"Of all the days to pull a stunt..."

"Would you prefer I'd waited until the ceremony?"

I looked up at him.

"Do you want to incur Rarity's wrath?"

He thought for a moment.

"Good point. I don't need a bunch of ponies mad at me right now."

I sighed.

"Well it's nice to see you here. I wasn't sure you'd want to come."

He rolled his eyes.

"I didn't. But Fluttershy asked me to be her plus one."

I smiled.

"Really? Because I remember filling out that invitation myself. I believe I wrote Fluttershy and Discord."

"Nice try."

"Check the invitation yourself."

He looked at me for a moment before snapping his claws. The invitation appeared and he read it over. He frowned.

"What are you implying with this?"

I couldn't help but grin.

"I thought it was obvious."

"We're not-"

He looked around to ensure our privacy before leaning in closer.

"We're not a couple!"

I rolled my eyes.

"Come on, Discord. Don't you think she would have found a nice stallion by this point if she wasn't interested in you?"

"Like Tartarus! I would have snapped any stallion into the next dimension!"

"I can believe that. Let's look at the facts; you see each other at least twice a week, you help her out whenever she asks, and let's not forget that it's painfully obvious that you're in love with her. And it's obvious she loves you too! Sounds like the start of a relationship to me."

I didn't have time to react as I was lifted off the ground, raised to eye level with the draconequus. His eyes looked as if they were on fire. He just glared at me for a minute before allowing the fire to die. I was lowered to the ground, a brush appearing to dust me off.

"Consider me letting that slide your wedding gift."

I smiled.

"Why do you still act so defensive about this? We can all tell you two love each other. Why won't you just admit it?"

He looked down at me, his expression changing from annoyance to uncertainty.

"It's...it's not that easy."

I raised a hoof and pat his side.

"It could be."

"There you are!"

We turned to see Fluttershy coming down the aisle. She was wearing her bridesmaid dress already. I glanced up and saw Discord actually turn a little red. I smiled and looked back at Fluttershy.

"Looking for me?"

"Oh. Sorry Shade. I was looking for Discord. I wasn't sure where you’d wandered off to!"

She climbed up to the altar and looked up at the draconequus.

"You look very nice."

Discord smiled down at the pegasus.

"And you look absolutely beautiful."

That got her blushing.

"Hey!"

We all looked down the aisle to discover Pinkie. She looked confused.

"Isn't this Rarity and Shade's wedding?"

The three of us looked at each other. That's when I saw it. Discord and Fluttershy were in the appropriate spots. And I was right where the officiate should be. Discord and Fluttershy seemed to connect the dots just as fast as me as they both started blushing.

Discord took a step back.

"I completely forgot about that...thing...I have to do...right now..."

He snapped his claw and disappeared. I chuckled, looking at Fluttershy.

"You two are adorable."

She was still blushing.

"Oh. Well..."

I jumped down from the altar.

"Don't second guess yourself Fluttershy. You'll just delay your happiness."

I walked over to Pinkie and smiled.

"Was there something you needed?"

She smiled back.

"I just thought you'd like to check the cake before everything starts."

I put a hoof to my face.

"The cake! How could I have forgotten!"

Pinkie giggled.

"You've got a lot on your plate. So...what did I walk in on?"

I chuckled.

"Young love."

"Those two have been circling each other for years now. It's about time they settle down."

She giggled again.

"What would a pegasus/draconequus baby look like?"

"I don't think we need any spawn of Discord in Equestria."

"Good point."

We arrived at the kitchen. The cake was front and center on the counter. I had to keep myself from drooling.

"That looks delicious Pinkie!"

"Thanks! Some of my best work yet!"

"You're on par with the Cakes."

She blushed.

"I don't know if it's that good."

"I'm sure it is!"

I looked around, trying to pin the new voice. A stallion appeared from behind the cake. He had a big, goofy grin on his face.

"Tasty enough to eat right here and now!"

Pinkie smiled.

"You'd better be talking about the cake silly."

I looked at her in surprise. The stallion came cartwheeling over, landing a few steps away.

"It's nice to meet you!"

Pinkie beamed.

"Oh yeah! You've never officially met! Shade, this is Cheese Sandwich! He's a party pony just like me!"

"Really? I never would have guessed."

I looked between the two of them. Pinkie kept looking up at Cheese, a small smile on her face.

"So...how long has this been going on?"

Pinkie giggled.

"We've known each other for a while, but this is kind of our first official date."

"You thought a wedding was a good first date?"

Cheese chimed in.

"Well it is a party. Though you seem to be missing a cannon or two."

Pinkie shook her head.

"Rarity specifically said no cannons."

She narrowed her eyes as her grin turned playful.

"Maybe her next wedding."

I turned red as Pinkie giggled even more.

"It's a joke Shade!"

I sighed, choosing to examine the cake closer. It really was a wonderful looking cake. Pinkie had outdone herself this time. I looked up to ask about the frosting only to find that I'd been abandoned.

"Seriously? Where could those two have- I don't even want to know."

I left the kitchen, heading to my old room. It was time to throw on my tuxedo.

As I turned a corner, I nearly ran into Twilight.

"Oh, my goodness! I'm sorry Shade."

"No, no. That's on me. I'm all kinds of distracted."

She smiled.

"Wedding jitters?"

I shook my head.

"To say the least. It seems love is spreading through this castle like a wildfire."

She rolled her eyes.

"Tell me about it. Shining Armor and Cadance keep giggling to each other. Not to mention I saw them coming out of a broom closet."

A shudder ran through her body. I put a hoof on her shoulder.

"Ouch. That must have been scarring."

"Scarring doesn't even begin to describe..."

I needed to distract her.

"Hey! How's your speech looking for the ceremony?"

She shook her head, clearing out unpleasant thoughts, and smiled.

"I'm all ready! You won't regret having me as the officiate."

"I don't think we can go wrong with having the Princess of Equestria as our officiate. Although..."

I held a hoof up to my head, moving it over to Twilight's head.

"I don't appreciate you getting taller. It hasn't even been a year yet and you've already grown two inches!"

She blushed.

"Don't bring it up! I already feel self-conscious about this alicorn stuff as it is."

"Okay, but can you admit the hair thing is kind of cool?"

She smiled as she looked at her mane. It was starting to flow on its own. Not as much as Celestia's or Luna's, but I'm sure that would change with time. Thinking of those two...

"Have you seen them yet?"

"Who?"

"Celestia and Luna."

"Oh! They just arrived a few minutes before I bumped into you!"

"That's good. They'd better behave themselves."

"I'm sure they wouldn't cause trouble!"

I gave Twilight my best smirk.

"Really?"

Her wings flattened against her side as she blushed again.

"Well, I'm mostly sure."

"Uh-huh. With my luck one of them will be the next one somepony walks in on."

Twilight covered her ears.

"Ah! Don't say that! I don't need that picture in my head too!"

I gave her a hug.

"There, there. The wedding is the important thing right now. We don't want to stress out Rarity."

Twilight looked at me.

"What about you?"

I chuckled.

"I'm already stressed. I just know how to hide it."

"Did Cadance teach you that trick too?"

"Luna actually."

We chuckled at our shared stress. I nodded down the hall.

"I need to get dressed. I'll see you down there."

She smiled.

"Good luck today. I'm so happy for both of you."

"You're just happy that your matchmaking worked out."

She flashed a proud smile.

"That too."

She walked off, leaving me alone in the hall. I found my room and got dressed. Several minutes were spent admiring myself in the mirror.

"Not bad."

Once I was satisfied, I left the room and made my way downstairs. As I walked through the halls though, I had to pause at Celestia's old study. I suppose it would be Twilight's study now. Either way, I was hearing noise from inside. Very specific noises. I shook my head.

"What is it about this castle today?"

I knew I shouldn't intrude, but curiosity got the better of me. I knocked on the door.

"Is somepony in there?"

I heard two gasps and a bunch of movement. After a few seconds, it was silent. I opened the door and entered the study.

Papers were on the floor, a couple books had fallen off a shelf, and I could see a pair of blue ears peeking out from behind the desk. I couldn't help but grin.

"Oh there you are Rainbow Dash."

Her head shot up over the desk.

"Uh...hi. I was just...taking a nap."

"Gotta be well-rested for the ceremony, right?"

She stood up fully.

"Uh...yeah!"

I shook my head.

"Has anypony ever told you you're a bad liar?"

She grinned.

"Why would I lie to you buddy?"

I smiled.

"That's true."

I turned as if to leave and called over my shoulder.

"I'd better go. I think Big Mac mixed up the apple supplies again."

"Dammit Big Mac"

Rainbow Dash flinched. I smiled, turning back into the room. Rainbow looked down next to her and sighed.

"Damn."

I chuckled.

"You going to keep hiding Applejack?"

Applejack slowly rose over the desk, her embarrassment clear.

"I uh...we..."

I held up a hoof, looking at Rainbow.

"I'm glad to see that Hearts and Hooves card went over well. But it's been two years! Have you two have been sneaking around that long?"

Applejack looked at Rainbow.

"You told him about that card?"

Rainbow scowled.

"I didn't tell him! He just saw it!"

I chimed in.

"After you dropped it on the ground."

She glared at me. I smiled as Applejack rubbed her neck.

"Well...now what?"

I sighed.

"You know the girls would be ecstatic to hear about the two of you, right?"

Applejack shrugged.

"We just didn't want things to change. It's been kinda...excitin' sneakin' around."

Rainbow nodded.

"What she said."

I nodded.

"Trust me, I understand. Rarity and I used to sneak around this castle too."

Rainbow smiled.

"Did you ever get caught?"

"There were a few close calls, but luckily Celestia and Luna never caught us in the act."

I turned to leave.

"You should tell everypony. That's just my opinion though. But I'll kill both of you if you upstage the wedding."

Rainbow laughed.

"Yeah. We wouldn't want to steal all the thunder."

I left the room and continued toward the throne room. All the love in the air was making me a little light-headed. Ever since I'd grown my fangs back at Everhoof, I'd been able to taste emotion again. And the castle, apparently being ground zero today, was making me feel overstuffed.

I entered the throne room to find Celestia and Luna talking to Twilight. Luna raced over as soon as she saw me, pulling me into a hug.

"Congratulations! It's your big day!"

I hugged her back.

"I'm glad you two could make it. I was afraid you'd be halfway around the world by now."

I parted from Luna as Celestia came in for a hug.

"As if we'd miss this. You're our little brother after all."

I returned the hug and looked at the two of them, beginning to notice small things. My eyes dimmed a little. Before I could say anything, Celestia turned to Twilight.

"You'd better make sure everything is ready. I'm sure everyone will be in their seats soon."

Twilight nodded. She went to pass me, giving me a small smile, and left the room. Celestia turned back to me.

"You noticed?"

I sighed.

"You...look older."

Luna chuckled.

"What gave it away?"

I looked between the two of them.

"You've got wrinkles. Not to mention I can see it in your eyes. You're aging again."

Celestia nodded.

"We decided it's time."

Luna chimed in.

"It's not like we're going to turn into dust or anything. But the initial break with the ethereal plane was a little tougher than expected. We'll probably look better in a few weeks. And we're young! I'd say we still have a good seventy or eighty years in us!"

I smiled. The love I'd been forced to gorge on was subsiding as something bittersweet took hold. My smile faded and I sighed.

"I guess I should have figured you'd eventually want to move on."

Celestia pulled me into a hug and Luna joined in.

"You're not going to lose us Shade. We're your family."

Luna nodded.

"And we like having a little brother, so you're stuck with us."

I laughed as I felt a tear roll down my cheek. Celestia reached up and wiped it away.

"No tears unless they're happy. It's your wedding day after all."

I nodded as the doors burst open. Spike came flying in.

"There you are! Twilight's on my tail about getting you to the altar. And you two should be in your seats already!"

We all laughed as the young dragon herded us outside to the gardens. The seats were filled! I hurried over to my spot as Celestia and Luna took their seats. Twilight gave me a stern look as I brushed off my tux.

"Not very good to keep your Princess waiting."

I returned the look.

"Not very good to be without your crown."

She reached up in a panic, only to discover her crown was in place. I smiled as she gave a short huff toward me.

"Your sense of humor still needs work."

I spoke out of the corner of my mouth as I turned toward the seats.

"Take it up with Celestia. I learned from her."

The music began and everyone turned to the aisle. I watched as the procession came.

Discord rolled out a red carpet for him and Fluttershy to walk down. I rolled my eyes at his showmanship.

After them came Applejack and-

Twilight leaned over to me.

"Why is she with Rainbow Dash? I thought we got them escorts for the walk."

I couldn't help but smile.

"They decided to walk each other. After all, the other couples are doing the same."

"But they aren't..."

The Princess trailed off, her eyes growing bigger. I let out a soft chuckle and shook my head at the two mares. Rainbow Dash winked at me. Applejack mouthed 'sorry'.

After them came Pinkie and Cheese. I held my breath, waiting for something to happen.

Nothing.

Somehow Pinkie and Cheese were the normal couple today. That was a surprise.

They all took their spots as the music changed over. Everyone turned to the back.

I took a deep breath as Rarity came into view. She was in a dazzling, white dress that trailed behind her several steps. Her mane was in it's normal style, falling down one side of her face. All I could do was stare at her as she came down the aisle.

"Your jaw's dropping a little."

I glanced at Twilight. She tapped her chin and I mimicked the motion. Sure enough, my mouth had been hanging open slightly.

Rarity arrived at the altar, turning to me. She gave me a smile. It was the same sort of smile that had made me realize I loved her years ago.

We both turned to Twilight and she smiled.

"Are you ready?"

I glanced at Rarity, my own smile growing bigger. She met my gaze and nodded.

"I'm ready if you are."

I looked at Twilight and nodded.

"Take it away Princess."

'HONK!!!'

Everypony flinched. I spun around to find Fluttershy comforting Discord. She smiled.

"Sorry. He gets...emotional at weddings."

I had to keep myself from laughing. Of all the things that could have happened, Discord being emotional was at the bottom of the list.

I nodded to Twilight again.

"You'd better start before he cries us into a lake."

Twilight smiled and looked out over the crowd.

I wish I could remember everything Twilight said. In all honesty, her words faded into the background for me. All I could do was look at Rarity. And she looked right back at me, putting her hoof in mine as we took the first step into our future.

After

I looked at the page, letting out a sigh.

“Thus, another century passes.”

I sat back in my chair, thinking about how far I’d gotten. Nine centuries down, a little less than two to go. It was hard to believe I was getting close to the end of my history book. It had taken ten years so far, but I was confident the more recent history would be the easier portion.

“Daddy! Daddy! I see Mommy coming!”

I turned around from my desk and smiled.

“I think Mommy is coming home tomorrow. Maybe it’s your Aunt Sweetie?”

“No! I’m sure it’s her! I’m positive!”

I watched the young filly stare out the window. She was getting big. Or maybe that was her cutie mark making her look older.

Rarity and I hadn’t wasted time on our honeymoon. Her business was beginning to grow, but she knew that she wanted to be a mother. With me semi-retired it worked out perfectly to be the stay-at-home Dad. Before we knew it, Sapphire Lily was born. She’d been a perfect angel.Well...for the most part. She'd inherited Rarity’s need for dramatics, much to my chagrin. Now I lived with two drama queens.

“Mommy!”

I walked over to Lily and looked out the window. My smile grew at the pleasant surprise. It was Rarity! She waved to both of us and hurried to the door. Lily jumped on her as soon as the door opened.

“Mommy!”

Rarity started laughing.

“Hello sweetheart! I missed you!”

She put her saddlebag down and turned to me.

“Surprised?”

I leaned over and kissed her.

“Of course. We didn’t expect you back until tomorrow.”

“I caught an early train thanks to Capper!”

“How is the old feline?”

“He’s doing very well. He can’t wait to get my shop up and running there in the capital. I’ve been using him as my model down there.”

I chuckled.

“Should I worry about that?”

I turned to Lily.

“Honey, I think your mother wants to leave me for a cat.”

Lily looked curious.

“Is it a fluffy one?”

My smile disappeared as Rarity began laughing. I shook my head in mock anger.

“I have a right mind to ground you.”

I turned back to Rarity.

“The Abyssinians are going to love your work.”

She leaned forward and kissed me.

“Thank you. That’s the hope.”

I glanced past her and smiled.

“I think somepony is curious.”

She turned around to find Lily halfway into her saddlebag.

“Lily! What are you looking for darling?”

Lily emerged with a sad frown.

“Did you bring me anything?”

Rarity sighed, shaking her head.

“I’m sorry dearest. Not this time. But I promise I’ll get you something from Abyssinia when I go next.”

I looked over at a scroll on the kitchen table.

“It seems they want you back soon. That came for you yesterday. I doubt Capper thought it would get here before you.”

Rarity summoned the scroll and read it over.

“He’s convinced them to open three shops! I can’t believe it!”

I smiled and pulled her into a hug.

“Congratulations.”

Her smile slowly disappeared as she kept reading.

“The Abyssinians will need help learning how to reproduce my designs. And they’ll want input on the layout of the shops.”

She looked up from the scroll.

“I’d be away for two or three months.”

My smile disappeared and and we stared at each other for a few seconds. I nodded slowly.

“You have to do it.”

Her eyes widened.

“I couldn’t! I’m already away several days a month as it is! But three whole months?! I don’t think I could be without either of you for that long.”

Lily threw her hooves around Rarity’s neck.

“Don’t go Mommy. You just got home.”

Rarity brushed Lily’s mane with her hoof.

“Shhh. It’s alright. I’m not going anywhere.”

I looked at the scroll and considered the options.

“They probably wouldn’t get your designs exact, would they?”

Rarity shook her head.

“And it was already going to be a hassle opening the one shop. But Capper can try to handle it, I suppose.”

I shook my head.

“You won’t be happy with it unless you’re there.”

“But I can’t!”

She hoisted Lily up, holding her in a hug.

“I couldn’t possibly be away for so long without this little angel.”

I saw Lily’s grip tighten around her mother’s neck. A sigh escaped me as I looked at the two of them. My gaze traveled over to my desk, papers and books covering it.

“You know...my work can wait a few months. I need to spend some time in the present for once.”

Rarity shook her head.

“I can’t ask you to do that.”

“You don’t have to.”

“But...what about Lily’s schooling?”

I chuckled.

“All this traveling has thrown you off.”

I walked around her until I was in front of Lily.

“Sweetie, can you tell Mommy what started a few days ago?”

She raised her eyes out of Rarity enough to see me.

“Summer vacation.”

Rarity’s face lit up.

“Really? That’s exciting for you!”

Lily nodded, keeping hold of her mother. I brushed her mane out of her face.

“I know Mommy didn’t bring you anything, but what about this? We go with her on a big vacation!”

Her face lit up.

“Really?!”

I looked at Rarity.

“Well...if your mother is up for the adventure.”

Rarity smiled, tears welling up.

“That would be wonderful!”

I pulled them into a hug. Lily separated from Rarity enough to grab on to me. We stood there in that embrace for a minute until Rarity sniffed the air.

“Is something burning?”

I broke out of the hug.

“Son of a- The dinner!”

I ran into the kitchen, opening the oven. Smoke came billowing out, making me hack.

“Damn! I thought I had the timer set!”

I turned around. Rarity was covering Lily’s ears and frowning at me. I flashed a sheepish grin.

“Sorry.”

I set the pan on the counter, looking at the remains of dinner. I looked back at my two girls.

“So, who wants to eat out?”

Lily raised her hoof. Rarity rolled her eyes and smiled.

“One of these days, your father is going to burn the house down.”

Lily looked at me and shook her head.

“Please don’t.”

I smiled.

“I promise I won’t. Now why don’t you wash up so we can go find some food?”

Lily raced off to the bathroom. I walked to Rarity and pulled her close.

“I definitely couldn’t be without you for three months.”

I leaned in and kissed her for several seconds. I heard her sigh as she leaned into it.

“Are you guys going to stop being gross?”

We broke apart and looked at Lily. She was standing by the door, itching to go.

Rarity and I shared a look and started laughing. I waved to Lily.

“Okay. Let’s go.”

I let them walk out first as I looked around our home. We’d lived a comfortable ten years here. A smile crossed my face at the thought of leaving, even if it were only temporary.

“I could go for another adventure.”

My ears perked up as Rarity called me from outside. I stepped out and shut the door, hurrying to catch up to my family.

Author's Note

Thank you for joining me on this journey. I've enjoyed every step of the way.

For anypony wondering, this is Sapphire Lily.

The Forest

Shadows already covered the forest as I put the finishing touches on my newest timberwolf trap. Sunset wasn’t far off, and darkness would soon consume everything beneath the leafy canopy. I ran my hoof over the branch I’d put in place, briefly admiring my work. A sudden pinch of pain caused me to flinch and withdraw. A sliver of wood had made its home in my hoof. I removed the splinter and gently pressed my hoof against some nearby moss. The cooling sensation elicited a sigh from my body.

Distant rustling triggered my senses, the usual paranoia setting in. My ears strained to identify the source. After a minute, it was evident that the perpetrator was small and likely non-hostile. The tension in my body began to dissipate slowly, but not entirely. I’d survived...how long had I been stuck here now? Ten months? Maybe more? It was hard to keep track anymore.

The colors of the forest faded with the light. The time had come to retreat to the shelter; a group of boulders with a small gap at the center. It was the obvious choice for protection in this cursed place. I wish I had found it closer to my arrival, but such thinking wasn’t going to change anything.

Foliage covered the entrance, concealing my hiding place from any wandering eyes. Several fragrant plants dotted the foliage, helping to mask my scent from any predators. Though unpleasent to the nostrils, these pungent flowers had saved me on a few occasions.

I sat down and grabbed for some nearby berries, popping them into my mouth one after the other. They didn’t fill me up nearly as well as love did, but they and some other odds and ends from the forest had become my new diet. And oddly enough, they were beginning to grow on me. The first few times I’d tried to eat something other than love, I’d heaved it right back to the forest floor. But now? My stomach had learned to adapt and was a little more accepting.

Memories of love filled my head, recalling the last feast I'd had. It must have been prior to the Invasion... That felt so long ago now. How would my body react once I had a chance to consume something normal again?

‘Snap’

My thoughts were interrupted by a branch. Had something wandered near one of my traps? I listened for a minute, waiting for any sort of sound. Nothing came though. Perhaps it had been further out in the forest.

‘SNAP!’

This one was louder. Closer. And definitely sounded like one of my traps. I leaned forward to my wall of foliage, trying to find my trespasser. The leaves were dense and didn’t allow for many places to peer through. Some gentle nudging created the hole I needed. My eye quickly searched for my trap, hoping some small animal had set it off by accident. The clearing seemed to be deserted. What concerned me more was that the ground appeared barren. I could have sworn I’d left the trap directly across from my shelter...

Several branches flew across my line of sight. A chill crept up my spine as they fell to the forest floor with barely a sound. They were broken and mangled, like they had been chewed up and spat back out.

And then came a low growl.

I braced myself against the rocks as a timberwolf come into view. It was sniffing the ground, obviously searching for more of my scent. Fear told me to back away and hide. Experience told me to not take my eye off the predator. The timberwolf sniffed the remains of my trap and raised its head. Each breath it took in its attempt to locate me caused my heart to pound. It was no more than ten feet away but didn’t seem to catch on to my hiding place. Thank goodness for those flowers.

The timberwolf seemed frustrated at not finding any prey. A sigh of relief began to escape me as it moved away from the rocks.

And then a second wolf came into view.

This one announced itself with a snarl. I flinched and felt my hoof slip from the wall of rock I was pressed against. It made a scraping sound that echoed between the rocks. And if that didn’t seal my fate, my hoof hit another stone and received a deep cut. The blood came quickly. All control was lost as my body began to tremble.

What little light there was left in the day seemed to disappear instantly as a shadow filled the entrance of my shelter. The foliage was ripped away in a second and I gazed up at the beast. Its eyes were gleaming in the darkness, happy to have finally found what they had been searching for. I pressed myself against the back of the small space. There were no other way out. As the realization of my imminent death hit me, I let out a scream. It was drowned out by another snarl as the timberwolf lunged toward me.

It grabbed me by my leg. And it was my bad leg too. I felt the bones break immediately as I was dragged outside. The other timberwolf was waiting in the clearing, impatient for its meal. The last solid memory I had was of the two wolves looking down at me as I shook with fear. When they bore their fangs and leaned in closer, everything went black...

The briefest moment of consciousness came after that, blurred in a haze of agony. The wolves were retreating and a new creature was approaching me. After that split second of comprehension, the pain hit me faster than I had crash-landed into the forest. It was immense and unbearable. I blacked out again, knowing that death was approaching. And honestly...I welcomed it.

My senses began to manifest themselves once again, signaling I was still alive for the moment. A fire burned in every part of my body. The pain was intense enough to throw me back into the void. My eyes slowly pried themselves open, wishing to see how I’d survived the ordeal. In that moment I realized that simple fact; I had survived. By some unseen miracle I had gotten away from the timberwolves.

My eyes opened at last, taking in the surroundings. The clearing I had called home was gone. I was...in a tree? I blinked a few times to make sure my eyes were working properly. Why would I be inside a tree?

There were bottles, vials, and masks covering the interior. Where in Equestria was I? Amid the oddities decorating the walss, I found a window, the forest clearly visible and far too close. My heart ached knowing I was still in the forest. Then again, the pain could be due to the timberwolves.

The wheels of my mind began to turn, connecting the facts together. This was obviously a home of some kind. Which meant that someone lived here. Which means someone saved me! I marveled at the thought of having been rescued. Who would risk their life for me, a weak changeling?

A door creaked open on the other side of the tree, revealing what appeared to be a pony. But she was unlike any pony I’d ever seen before. She was covered head to hoof in stripes. Her eyes locked on to me immediately and a smile formed across her lips. Didn’t she know what I was? Or perhaps she didn't care? Either way, she didn't see me as a threat. I don't blame her. There were plenty of other dangers to worry about out there.

“You’re awake and that is good. I’ve brought along some tasty food.”

My limbs screamed in protest as I attempted to stand. My knees buckled halfway through. The short fall was enough to illicit a grunt of pain.

“Standing will be a challenge indeed. How long has it been since your last feed?”

I stared at her, weighing my options. If I could stand I could attempt an escape. But that would require actually having a normal amount of strength. I couldn’t stand, so that left flying out of here. I hadn’t flown in months after spraining one of my wings, but I’d have to risk it. Hopefully they had more strength than my other limbs. I flexed my back, readying for takeoff. I was about to smile when I noticed something...off.

I couldn’t feel my wings.

A dozen scenarios played through my mind as I turned my head. Every inch of my back and shoulders were covered in bandages. Blood was seeping through the fabric at an alarming rate. The striped pony approached as my bandages turned red.

“I’ll remove this and start to mend. You may not want to look my friend.”

Nothing could make me look away as I prayed to whatever deities there were that my fears weren’t true. The bandages were unraveled and pulled from my bleeding body. The reality made my stomach churn, forcing me to look away as the tears came.

My wings were gone.

The timberwolves had torn my entire back open, taking my wings in the process. I don’t know how I could still be alive from such a wound. The first tear rolled down my cheek as the striped one began pouring something over my wound. I groaned in protest but allowed her to continue. She was obviously trying to help. If she had meant for me to die, she’d have left me to the wolves.

I stood still as she stepped away to grab supplies, turning enough to see the progress in my peripheral. There was all manner of colored powders and salves covering the wound. I looked like a rainbow. The striped one returned and began wrapping a new bandage around me.

“Zecora is the name I bear. What is the one you choose to wear?”

Zecora. An odd name for sure. What was the second part though? The one you choose to wear? I shook my head in confusion as I sat down. She chuckled to herself and raised a hoof to her chest.

“Zecora.”

The hoof turned out until it was pointing at me. Oh! She wanted a name. Well...that was a problem. I hadn’t used a name in ages. Especially being alone in the forest. I wasn’t like the younger changelings that had started to identify themselves. I shook my head.

“I-“

My first word came out with a wheezing cough. I hadn’t had to speak to anyone in ages. The same result occurred on a second attempt. Zecora held up a cup of liquid and I took it without hesitation. It could be poison for all I cared as long as it got rid of this dry feeling. The liquid fell down my throat sending a cooling jolt through my body. Plain water never tasted better! The cup fell to the floor as I sighed.

“I...I don’t have a name.”

The confusion was apparent as her head tilted.

“No name of your own? Not even at home?”

“Maybe when I was young. But it’s long lost now.”

Pain shot through my limbs as I forced them to stand me up.

“How long have I been here?”

Zecora stretched out a hoof as my knees shook. I grabbed hold without thinking, and steadied myself.

“Three weeks under my caring touch. The timberwolves did not leave much.”

“Did you scare them off?”

“A howl of fright I did hear. I ran to see what caused such fear. I found the wolves amid their feast. And chased them off, those awful beasts.”

A tentative step nearly sent me to the ground again. As Zecora pushed me upright, I asked the obvious question.

“Why would you save me? A changeling that is.”

“There are no enemies beneath these trees. I saw with you much pain to ease.”

Another step yielded better, though still shaky, results. A literal step in the right direction! I took another step. What confidence had formed was instantly dashed away as my nose hit the floor.

“Damn!”

Zecora chuckled and walked to one of the nearby shelves.

“In time you will regain your strength. This occurs when you sleep at great length. Potions will mend your muscle and bone. And soon you will walk on your own.”

I sat back down on the makeshift bed Zecora had set up. I had a chance now to examine the other work she'd done for me. My bad leg was set between two boards in a splint. The muscles throbbed against the healing bones, causing me to flinch every few seconds. The hoofwork was impressive. It was better than what I had attempted months ago after landing in the forest. That had been the first time the leg broke. Lack of medical experience had left me with a limp. Now that it was broken again, maybe I’d regain some mobility. Or, knowing my luck, it would be worse than before.

Zecora approached with a vial of blue liquid and held it out to me. The threat of poison still persisted in my mind, but recent events left me wanting to trust her. The cork made a popping noise as I pulled it loose, the smell nearly knocking me out.

“You can’t really expect me-“

The foul liquid slid down my throat without warning. I hadn't even seen Zecora tip the vial to my lips. As soon as my airway was clear I began coughing.

“Are you trying to kill me?! I’m pretty sure being mostly dead once was enough!”

———————————

Several days passed without any excitement. It seemed that Zecora’s home wasn’t a place that the bigger beasts wandered near. Potions became my diet and exercise was pacing the floor. My bad leg was a nuisance in its current state. So, I hobbled around the room, regaining my strength.

My back was starting to knit together with scar tissue. Zecora had kept the bleeding to a minimum even with me moving around more. Every so often, my eyes searched for my wings, breaking my heart with each glance. I couldn’t believe I’d actually have to walk everywhere from now on. Exhaustion began to set in as I sat down, my legs thanking me for the respite. A book laid open on the table. Perusing the visible page, I noted it was a book on potions. Interesting...

I pulled the book closer, turning back to the first page. My mind began to take in the various uses for potions. Then it was on to the individual recipes. Zecora’s personal notes on certain elixirs offered intriguing insight. I turned another page over and found that I had reached the back cover. A moment of confusion passed as I registered what had happened. I’d forgotten just how fast I could consume information. It had been a while since I’d needed to use my gift. Well over a year ago by my recollection.

‘Creeeeak’

“What is it you wanted to show me Zecora?”

Fear took hold of me as two bodies came into view. Zecora was the first through the door. But behind her, a lavender pony was entering. The new pony found me after a split second, causing us to both freeze. A fleeting moment of uncertainty passed through the room as the situation sunk in.

“Zecora! There’s a changeling in your house!”

I braced myself for the inevitable attack, watching the unicorn light her horn. Zecora jumped in front of the pony, holding herself in a defensive stance.

“I will not have a battle here. Put out your horn now, Twilight dear.”

Twilight. I recognized that name. She’d been at Canterlot during the attack. In fact...she was the one that discovered Chrysalis! The one-

“Why do you have a changeling in your home? Don’t you realize how dangerous they are?!”

Her questions snapped me back to the present. I cleared my throat, bringing Twilight’s attention back to me. The table creaked as I brace myself against it.

“She saved my life. I would have died without her help.”

Twilight seemed to finally take in the whole scene in front of her as I worked on standing up. Half of my body was bandaged after all. I took a wobbly step forward and stood as tall as I could.

“Why are you here, if I might ask?”

Confusion set in for a few seconds, her eyes only leaving me for a moment as she addressed Zecora.

“Why did you bring me Zecora?”

Zecora smiled.

“His health is on the mend. But he is alone and needs a friend. The changeling Queen he cannot follow. A place in his heart has long been hollow. Friendship can fill this empty space. But in Ponyville, not this place.”

“You...you want me to be his friend?”

I’m sure I had a shocked look as well. That didn’t seem like a good idea. Horrible in fact. Especially with past events considered.

Zecora was unfazed by the reaction. Instead, she motioned Twilight to approach me. The unicorn's eyes reflected my uncertainty. Even with that fear, she moved closer. I stood my ground, hoping it looked like I was in command of the situation. The truth was that I didn’t think I’d be able to take a step without either falling or crashing into Twilight. She stopped a few steps from me and slowly held up her hoof.

“I’m Princess Twilight Sparkle.”

Princess? That was new. I stared at her hoof for a moment, trying to remember how this worked. I hadn't been around ponies in so long. I slowly raised my own hoof, mimicking her.

“I’m-“

Damn. This name thing again. I didn’t want it to look like I was hiding something. But the longer I stood there, the more uneasy Twilight became.

“Do you...have a name?”

What sort of name fit a changeling? I tried to recall the names of the younger generations. Nothing was coming to mind!

"Well..."

I looked around, hoping something would provide an answer to my dilemma. My eyes found the window that looked out into the forest. And something in my head clicked. I turned back to Twilight with a small smile.

“Shade. My name is Shade.”

The changeling that had crashed into this forest was gone, buried somewhere among the trees. I had survived a year in the shade of the forest canopy before the wolves. No Chrysalis. No hive. Just me. And so, despite my hatred of this cursed place, I would keep this new name as a reminder of where I was reborn. I was Shade. And I was going to survive.

Into the Sun

Zecora made sure I had a supply of potions in my saddlebag. It had been a several days since Twilight’s initial visit. She had come back twice more to learn about my past. I’d told her about my experiences in the forest and how I’d come to be there after the Invasion. Once she was satisfied I wasn’t a threat, she’d made the preparations for me to move to Ponyville.

The day had now come for me to leave the forest for good. I wasn’t sure what to expect when I arrived in town. I hadn’t been around others in so long. Sure I’d been in villages and towns before, but I was in disguise and gathering information. Strolling down the main road in my true form? Never. Was Twilight prepping every pony in town for what was about to walk through? Doubtful. I expected every pair of eyes to be locked on me.

There was a knock at the door, signaling Twilight’s arrival. As soon as the door opened, she came trotting in.

“Everything is ready. I’ve got a corner of the library set up for you. I wasn’t sure what sort of sleeping arrangements changelings are used to, so I hope a feather bed is okay.”

A chuckle somehow surfaced as my back ached from the saddlebag's presence.

“I’m used to cave floors Princess. Zecora’s pillows are the softest thing I’ve laid on in my entire life. I’m sure a feather bed will be fine.”

Her smile faded as my words sunk in.

“You’ve never...slept in a bed?”

“The caves were enough. Though I’m sure if there was any comfort to be had, it was exclusively for Chrysalis. She could care less about her underlings.”

Her mouth dropped open slightly.

“I didn’t think you’d speak so candidly. And to speak...negatively about your Queen too.”

My shoulders tensed as I closed my eyes.

“She’s had plenty of time to find me. The fact that I wasn’t brought back within the first few days meant I was never getting rescued. She doesn’t care about anyone but herself. Hopefully-“

I stood up, putting the full weight of the saddlebag on my back. My teeth ground together as spikes of pain took hold.

“-her selfish ego will be her downfall.”

“You’d want her overthrown?”

I smirked at the lavender pony as my body adjusted to the new discomfort.

“Not all of us have perfect royalty Princess.”

A slight color appeared in her cheeks and she broke eye contact with me. The royalty subject seemed to be a touchy matter. Perhaps because of her new status amongst them? A line of thought for another time.

I took a few steps forward and made small adjustments to the bag.

“Now if you’re done comparing monarchs, we can get going to Ponytown.”

Her brow furrowed.

“Ponyville.”

I put on the broadest smile I could muster.

“As you say.”

It was easy to tell she was keeping her temper in check. I wasn’t trying to antagonize her. At least not too much. I was used to conversing with other changelings. It was clear that ponies were a softer breed in many ways.

I took one last look around the room. My eyes eventually met Zecora’s pensive gaze. She smiled and nodded to me.

“Take care my patient dear. You are always welcome here.”

I gave a curt nod back.

“Thanks. But I’m never setting hoof in this forest again. No offense.”

She kept smiling as I turned to Twilight.

“Shall we?”

Twilight nodded and led the way out of the tree.

———————————

I stopped at the edge of the forest, my hooves about to enter the sunlight. It was really happening. I was about to get out of the forest that had been my prison for so long. I looked out to the sunny meadows ahead, unsure of what to expect. Twilight had already gone a few feet ahead of me, only stopping to look over her shoulder.

“The sun isn’t going to hurt you Shade.”

“I haven’t been in direct sunlight in a year. Or if I have, it’s been minutes at most.”

“So, you might get sunburnt. You won’t burst into flames.”

She approached me and held out her hoof. I looked at it for a second, confused.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m...offering to help?”

“Help?”

Her hoof lowered to the ground.

“You know...help. Providing...service for another without expecting anything in return?”

“I know the term. But...why would you help me?”

“Don’t changelings help each other?”

“Well...we provide support to different squads during battle. Is that similar?”

“Um...surprisingly, yes. I’m trying to give you support. I know that this is a big moment for you. Let me help you leave Everfree once and for all.”

We stared at each other for a moment before she offered her hoof again. I took it and let her lead me into the light. I had to close my eyes. The sun was brighter than I remembered! Had it always been this hot? Maybe I should have a hat or something.

“Are you okay?”

I slowly opened my eyes, allowing them to adjust to the bright, new world I’d entered.

“I’ll be fine.”

Twilight seemed unconvinced, but she turned and began walking along the path. I followed her, looking around as we went. After a moment, Twilight fell into step beside me.

“Honestly I’m surprised at how sensitive you are to the sun. You must have found clearings. And from what Zecora told me, she found you about a mile away from the old castle.”

“I never went near that castle. I couldn’t be sure if it was still being used. Plus I think it’s haunted.”

A giggle escaped from Twilight.

“Haunted? What would make you think that?”

“I heard screaming one night. It sounded like a gang of banshees from my shelter.”

“When was that?”

“About two months ago.”

Twilight stopped in her tracks.

“Oh. That...might have been me and my friends. We accidentally scared each other.”

I gave her a questioning look. She waved her hoof in the air.

“It’s a long story. Trap doors, an organ, Pony of Shadows. A really crazy night.”

“Fascinating.”

I continued walking, with Twilight catching up after a moment.

“How’s your back doing? Zecora wanted me to make sure to check in with you about that.”

“It’s fine. The saddle bag isn’t too heavy”

“Your wings must be uncomfortable under all those bandages.”

It was my turn to stop. I felt anger and sadness boiling up inside me. I hadn’t really dealt with the situation, choosing to ignore it for the most part. It took all of my concentration to not yell at Twilight as I took a deep breath.

“For your information...I don’t have my wings anymore.”

Her eyes grew bigger.

“I...I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

I felt my heart pounding in my chest. I wanted to drop the subject. It was getting uncomfortable. I took one step and felt a tear roll down my cheek. What was happening to me? My legs began to tremble. My own body was growing heavier. I had to sit down. Another tear appeared. Twilight stepped closer, putting a hoof on my shoulder.

“I’m sorry. I can’t imagine what living out there must have been like. Even what you described to me barely gives me an understanding.”

I couldn’t speak. I could only let the tears run down my face. How could I be so weak? What had I become? How would I ever....

The thoughts disappeared from my head in an instant. They were taken over by a single question; what was Twilight doing to me?

Her body was pressed against me, her warmth seeping through me like a fire. Her hooves were wrapped around me, as if to hold me in place. There was strength behind it, but not enough to hurt. In fact...it felt...nice.

Twilight pulled away, giving me a half-smile. I didn’t want to ruin the moment, but I had to know.

“What was that?”

She didn’t even seem surprised.

“The first thing you’re going to have to learn about friendship is that sometimes a hug is needed.”

A hug? I recalled having seen ponies do this action but had never understood the function or purpose. But after having experienced one, I had to say it was truly a novel thing. I wiped away the remaining tears and stood up.

“So you’re my friend now?”

“I’d say we’re about two steps closer than before.”

“How many more to go?”

“By my count, forty-three.”

My body convulsed and my first laugh, since I can’t even recall, came out. It was a wonderful feeling to laugh.

“Forty-three. That’s funny.”

Twilight seemed confused.

“Well I’ll have to check my manual when we get to the library, but I’m pretty positive on that number.”

".....You're kidding...right?"

Twilight giggled and began walking again.

"I'm the Princess of Friendship. Why would I ever joke about a manual on making friends? It's a solid resource and can be very helpful at times!"

She gave me a speech about making friends as we continued to walk. With every step I took, I realized I had stepped out of one fire and into another.

Two Sisters

I started out slow. Celestia would let me sit in on her meetings, usually just as an observer. Most ponies ignored me. I didn’t mind though. I preferred being in the background. Every few meeting though, Celestia would motion me over to her and whisper in my ear. She never asked me anything too serious. Usually it was something very off topic from her meetings. It became our little game. We would have a good laugh.

The ponies in the meeting would get nervous that the Princess was seeking another opinion besides their own. And every time we finished whispering to each other, she would sit up and say something official-sounding. It never quieted their nerves of course, which was the real fun. All of these posh ponies getting worked up while all we were discussing was if the meeting room could do with a new paint job.

This had gone on for a week. And today was no different. I was casually listening to Celestia discuss an upcoming delegation that she was putting Twilight in charge of.

It was nice to see that she was involving the young alicorn more and more. Twilight seemed to be the only Princess not ruling over a portion of the kingdom. But I knew being the Princess of Friendship was a big deal as well. She oversaw the general well-being of everypony. It wasn’t an easy task.

My train of thought was interrupted as I noticed Celestia’s gaze. She motioned for me to come over. I moved towards her, keeping my face as stoic as I could. I had learned that not showing emotion was one way to look like you knew what you were doing. And so I marched over to Celestia, noticing concerned glances from the corner of my eye. It took everything for me not to smile.

Celestia leaned over to me and whispered.

“Do you think Twilight will be up for this?”

I had to keep myself from looking too surprised. I hadn’t expected the question. Honestly, I thought she was going to ask what sounded good for lunch. Or if I thought that Luna was trying a new look with her mane. I took a moment to reorient my thoughts and nodded.

“Yeah. I think she’ll do just fine. You’ve said you wanted to give her more responsibilities since Tirek. This is a great opportunity.”

Celestia made a show of nodding and looking at the ponies around the table. I think some of them were starting to sweat. Celestia smiled and returned her attention to me.

“I don’t want to overwhelm her.”

“She’s been a Princess for over a year now Celestia. You know she’s dying to show what she can do.”

“I know... It’s just...”

She turned to the other ponies.

“Is there anything else pressing concerning the delegation?”

The ponies looked nervously at each other. Finally one spoke up.

“I think we’ve covered everything important for now Princess Celestia. Unless you had...concerns?”

“None that come to mind. Let us adjourn for the day. We can discuss the details tomorrow.”

The ponies all bowed their heads and exited the room. As soon as the last of them were out and the door shut, she turned back to me.

“I know Twilight is ready. And I’m sure she’ll do just fine with the delegation. It’s just hard to admit that she’ll be okay.”

I shook my head.

“You’ll have to explain.”

Celestia sat back down in her seat and sighed.

“Twilight has always been an excellent student. She’s surpassed all of my expectations at every opportunity.”

“And she’ll do it again with the delegation.”

“That’s not the point. She’s too good. Everything has happened so fast.”

“What do you mean fast? It’s not like she suddenly became the brightest unicorn in Equestria. She’s been like that all of her life. And she’s in her twenties.”

“Well twenty-odd years is pretty short to me.”

I smiled.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were seeing your child off to the first day of school.”

Celestia’s expression twisted a little as a tear rolled down her cheek. My eyes widened.

“Damn! I didn’t mean to- All I meant- Please Celestia, I’m sorry. I’m sorry!”

She wiped the tears away and sniffles.

“She’s grown up so fast. I know she has her own family. Her own parents. But... I was always so proud of her when she was at my school. And when she moved to Ponyville I was so scared that she wouldn’t follow my advice.”

The tears were starting to form again.

“I’ve watched her grow in every way possible. And now I’m sitting here talking about having her do something that I would normally do myself. Because she’s perfectly capable of doing it now.”

She leaned down close to me, her voice falling to a whisper.

“Yes. I’m a mother watching her child go out into the world. And even though she’s ready...I'm not.”

She rested her head on my shoulder as the tears kept falling. I put a hoof around her and held her there. She pressed so hard into me that I felt a small headache forming.

“She’s more than ready Celestia. And letting her do this doesn’t mean that she doesn’t need you. You’re always going to be her teacher. She’ll come to you with lots of problems. Most of them probably blown out of proportion.”

She laughed and lifted her head.

“True. She does seem to get stressed about the little things.”

I smiled up at the alicorn.

“Maybe you’re not her mother, but I would bet a million bits that you’re a close second for the title. Her mother may have raised her, but you helped shape her into the amazing pony she is now. And in that way, she’s yours.”

She nodded slowly.

“She’s the closest I’ll ever come to having a daughter. And I’ll never stop loving her as such.”

“Nopony ever said you had to.”

I shuffled my hooves.

“Can I ask you something?”

Celestia nodded. I took a breath before continuing.

“Why have you never had children of your own?”

She stared at me for several seconds, no doubt weighing her options.

“Well...as you’ve seen in the recent days...I’m very busy.”

“Fair, but lots of busy ponies make the time for a relationship.”

She rolled her eyes.

“Well yes, but you have to add in the Royalty factor. My duties always came first. There was never time for a suitor, let alone children.”

“And what about before your coronation? Surely you’d had some stallions interested? I mean...you’re an attractive mare.”

Her brow raised at that comment. I quickly continued.

“So there must have been somepony at least.”

She shook her head.

“I was young. I’d never really known anypony outside of my village. And I spent most of my time with Luna.”

“Causing all kinds of mischief I bet.”

Her smile returned.

“A little. But mostly I kept to my studies. I had always had an aptitude for magic. So did Luna. But she never took her studies quite as seriously back then.”

I was eating up every detail. She was being so open. I didn’t dare mention the fact lest I close the door on this opportunity. Celestia continued.

“But magic was a cornerstone of our culture. Everypony studied it, whether they had horns or not. We thought it important to have the knowledge. Especially since-“

She stopped suddenly and sat up straight.

“I’m sorry. I’m getting off topic.”

Damn.

“It’s okay. Were there really no stallions chasing after either of you back then?”

“No. Most of the stallions in my village were older. There weren’t a lot of children either. And the few colts there were were younger than Luna and I.”

“What about when the three kingdoms arrived?”

She glanced at me from the corner of her eye.

“What makes you think we weren’t part of the Unicorn Kingdom?”

“Oh come on Celestia. Even if the histories don’t explicitly say so, it’s obvious you and Luna were already living here. I take it that you lived in what was left of Grogar’s kingdom?”

“You do know that Grogar is just a legend, right?”

“Are you really going to lie to me? There’s far too many details and accounts for him to not be real. Maybe he’s just a fairy tale to the rest of Equestria, but you can’t fool me.”

She shrugged.

“Worth a shot. Grogar is something that we tried to put behind us.”

“But his time must have been long before you.”

“Not as long as you’d imagine. Yes it was still a few centuries, but we still dealt with what was left of his reign. Monsters roamed the land, the few towns there’d been were ancient ruins, and his actions left Gusty traumatized in her older age.”

“How would you know that if it happened hundreds of years before?”

“Well... She told me herself.”

“You’re telling me that Gusty the Great lived to be hundreds of years old?”

Celestia nodded.

“She was from my village originally. And she was the one to...create the spell for ascension.”

“You’re kidding!”

“I’m not. It’s because of Gusty that alicorns came into existence. And she was the first. She had to test it on somepony. And it was risky.”

“Did she know that it would make her live for so long?”

Celestia looked down at me and sighed.

“I believe your original question was if I met anypony after the kingdoms arrived and formed Equestria?”

Damn again.

“Sorry. I get sidetracked easily.”

Celestia nodded.

“As do I apparently. The answer is no. I didn't meet any suitors. In fact, the only stallion I met at first was Star Swirl. And that was a few years after Equestria was formed.”

“What was he like? I bet the stories don’t do him justice.”

“You’d be right. He was a force of nature in his own right. Especially in his younger years. Before he went grey he had a power that was on par with what I posses now.”

“He must have been something.”

“He was. I’m not embarrassed to admit that, when I first met him, I was a little taken. But his personality soon wiped out any crush I might have had.”

I chuckled.

“He sounded pretty eccentric from what I’ve read.”

“Now that history underplays. After I began to take lessons from him, I thought he was the craziest unicorn I’d ever met.”

“And he became your teacher, presented you and Luna to the kingdoms as potential rulers, and the rest is literally history.”

“Pretty much.”

“And being a Princess cut off your chances of a family?”

A smile crossed Celestia’s lips.

“All of Equestria became my family.”

I stood up and stretched my hooves.

“Thank you for telling me all of that. It was insightful. Though you definitely stopped yourself from telling me the good parts.”

“Perhaps when I’ve decided you’re ready.”

She stood and stretched as well.

“Come on. I’m starving. I might even take my time today and enjoy my meal.”

We left the meeting room and made our way to the kitchen. I kept glancing up at the Princess, wondering what the future would hold. Would she tell me more about those early years? There were so many unanswered questions about her life. It was one of the only undocumented periods of Equestrian history. My curiosity and thirst for knowledge were pushing me to find out.

I don’t know why I felt it was so important to know. Was it some leftover habit for finding an enemy’s weakness? Or was I genuinely interested in learning about my newest friend? It was a hard to judge my motives at times like this. I didn’t bare any ill will towards Celestia. I wanted her to trust me fully. I really wanted to be her friend.

I couldn’t help but inwardly roll my eyes. I was trying to make friends now? What had Twilight done to me? The very idea was bringing on another headache.

—————————

The day passed by without any more major conversations. Celestia kept it light after that. I didn’t mind. I was still processing everything anyways.

When the day came to a close, I retired to my room. I felt my body growing heavier as it realized that the bed was near. I fell into the mattress without hesitation, a sigh leaving my body in the process.

My mind was filled with the events of the day. It was a little much for me at the moment. I closed my eyes and began to focus. I pictured my cloud and allowed everything else to melt away. Only one thought remained; how thankful I was to Rarity for this meditation. I let all of my stress and anxiety from the day melt into a puddle. As it did, I could feel sleep creeping in on the edge of my vision. I happily fell into the abyss.

——————————

I opened my eyes and found myself in a meadow.

“This is new.”

“I thought we could talk somewhere more pleasant than the forest.”

I turned around. Luna was standing behind me. I felt a smile form.

“Anywhere is better than Everfree. It’s good to see you again Luna.”

She motioned for me to sit and I got comfortable. One of the plus sides of my dreams was that my bad leg wasn’t hurt here. I tucked it under my body without a problem. Luna took a seat as well.

“I heard from Celestia that you two have been causing a stir amongst the nobility. Do you delight in stretching the nerves of everypony?”

“It was her idea.”

“I know. But the question still stands.”

“Well...I guess so. It’s pretty fun to see them squirm.”

Luna smiled.

“Celestia and I used to do that to Star Swirl. He hated it.”

“She told me a little about your village today. It sounds like you two had a pretty normal fillyhood.”

“Until Star Swirl came along, yes. We were just your average fillies, even if we were very talented. And that’s all I’ll say right now. From what Celestia told me earlier, she said plenty.”

Damn again.

“Fine. Spoil my fun.”

“Why the interest in us?”

“Honestly? I just want to get to know you two.”

“Both of us? I know you’ve spent a good amount of time with Celestia, but you and I have only met a few times in your dreams really. I didn’t think that there’d be more to our acquaintanceship than that.”

I pretended to be hurt.

“Acquaintanceship? Is that all I am to you?”

She rolled her eyes.

“Celestia is rubbing off on you I see.”

I chuckled.

“I’d like to be your friend too Luna. Is that so hard to accept?”

“A little. I’m still a bit wary of you.”

“I’d be worried if you weren’t. I’m a changeling after all.”

She nodded her agreement. Before she could respond though, the ground shook slightly. I looked around the empty meadow.

“What was that?”

“That was you I believe. Your body must have had a muscle spasm. Those happen sometimes when you sleep. Though I’ve never seen it affect the dream world before...”

She became lost in thought. I looked around the meadow. It was peaceful here. And the moon was bathing it in a beautiful, blue light.

“You did a wonderful job with this dream.”

That snapped Luna back to the present.

“It was nothing. I try my best.”

“I don’t often get out at night. Is this how the sky always looks?”

“On a perfect, cloudless night? Yes.”

“It’s beautiful.”

She smiled, looking up at the dream sky.

“Thank you. Not many ponies compliment my nights.”

“That’s a shame. The night sky is far more entertaining to look at. The stars and the moon add something special.”

“I always thought so. But very few ponies get to enjoy it. Sleeping takes priority for most.”

“You don’t seem as sad about that now.”

She turned her gaze from the sky to me. I instantly regretted opening my mouth.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to insinuate-“

She held up a hoof to silence me.

“It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean anything by it. I’ve grown a lot since my youth.”

“May I ask...why?”

She stared for a second, realizing what I was asking. A long sigh left her body.

“Do you mean why did I let my anger consume me?”

I nodded. Luna looked back up at the sky.

“I feel that it was more than that, but my emotions certainly contributed. I think the biggest factor was the isolation.”

“Isolation?”

“There’s nopony else that helps me in my role. Celestia requires a staff of dozens to help run the kingdom during the day, but there’s nothing that needs to be done during the night. So I’m left alone to handle my duties every evening.”

“That sounds lonely.”

She nodded.

“Then imagine doing that for a century. Nopony to see what you do for them. Left to protect them when they’re not even aware.”

“And Celestia was always the one in the public eye.”

“So does it surprise you that my darker emotions took root?”

“I suppose not. I can only imagine what that must have been like for you.”

“There are parts of my life that I prefer to leave in the past.”

Another tremor shook the ground. Luna looked around the meadow and frowned.

“This isn’t normal. Your dreamscape shouldn’t be affected by involuntary movements.”

She stood and approached me. I didn’t move as she began pacing around me.

“Tell me, have you been having headaches?”

“A couple today. But I figured that it was from all of those meetings.”

“Hmm...”

She paused in front of me.

“Shouldn’t you have a horn?”

I parted my mane, revealing the small stump I’d left during my alterations.

“It’s there, just hidden.”

“At least you didn’t get rid of it entirely. That could have caused you problems.”

“Well I guess that’s good . But this thing hardly does me any good anyways.”

Luna’s head tilted slightly.

“What do you mean?”

“Well I never use my magic, so what’s the point of a horn?”

She raised a hoof to her face and sighed.

“Well no wonder you’re getting headaches! How long has it been since you’ve used your magic?”

“I don’t know...almost a year?”

“You must be joking!”

I shook my head.

“After I made these alterations there hasn’t been any need.”

“Didn’t anypony ever tell you- No. I suppose you wouldn’t have known.”

It finally clicked in my head.

“You mean it’s a bunch of built up magic?”

She nodded.

“If you don’t cast spells, the unused magic will start discharging on its own. Headaches are the first side effect. If you don’t release the magic, the headaches will get worse.”

“Why do I feel like there’s more to it than that?”

“The discharges would get more intense until a final discharge would be set off. It would either kill you or drain you of all your magic permanently.”

“So...I need to use my magic.”

“Precisely.”

“I don’t think ponies will appreciate me disguising myself.”

“Surely you know other spells besides changing your form?”

“Not really. The most I can do is fire off bolts of energy.”

The Princess looked down at the ground, deep in thought.

“Hmm....perhaps we can fix that.”

What did she mean by that?

Before I could voice my question, a mist began to gather. I looked around as the grass of the meadow faded away, the fog rolling across the surface. I glanced back to Luna, but discovered that she’d disappeared. I rolled my eyes.

“Really? No explanation whatsoever?!”

The meadow faded away as I was once again consumed by the abyss. Honestly, what was with these Princesses and being vague?

Taking A Break

The newfound wave of depression held a tight grip on me in the following weeks. I did what I could to keep up with Celestia’s schedule. For a while I did just fine. I could force my way through meetings and make conversation when I needed to. But after that...I found I was having trouble focusing. My mind began to wander more and more.

Most of my thoughts were consumed with my new reality. It turned out that Discord was right. My mind was proving to be as stubborn as an ox when it came to the changes in my life. It was like I was at war with myself.

Celestia brought in a doctor once it was evident I wasn’t changing back. A thorough examination clued us in to what Discord had done to me. My body was very much a pony’s body. My organs and tissue had been altered, but my physical features had been left intact. My brain was in shambles due to mental and emotional exhaustion, but after that it was normal. The doctor declared as much.

“Your metabolism is at a normal level. And the organ and tissue samples seem to suggest full development. Based on all of that, I’d say you’re around twenty-four or twenty-five. A perfectly healthy, young stallion.”

I slowly nodded as the doctor told me this. Rarity held my hoof the whole time. Celestia thanked him and showed him the door. As soon as we were alone I found my voice.

“He can be trusted?”

Celestia smiled.

“Doctors aren’t in the habit of revealing specific details about a patient. And Doctor Night works exclusively with the Royalty. We can trust him completely.”

I sighed in relief.

“Okay. So what happens now?”

“You’re not sick as far as we can tell. You can continue your normal duties if you want.”

Rarity squeezed my hoof.

“You can take a break if you need. We know it’s been hard for you to adjust..”

I smiled at her.

“Thanks. But it might be good for me to get back to a normal routine. Keep my mind off of things.”

That worked for a little over a week. After that, I couldn’t concentrate in any committee meetings. And then it hit a breaking point. The day had wrapped up and I was walking to the dining room. As far as I knew the day had gone by without a problem.

I entered the dining room and sat down at the table. Celestia and Luna weren’t here yet. Part of me thought to wait, but my stomach said otherwise. By the time the sisters arrived I’d already eaten half the food on my plate.

“You two are late. Everything okay?”

Celestia glanced at Luna. Luna sighed as she stepped forward.

“We were resolving a few issues.”

“What issues?”

“Shade, do you remember what you did today?”

I paused in my eating. Why would she ask me that?

“Of course I do! This morning was my meeting with...”

Odd. I couldn’t remember all of a sudden.

“There were the meetings with...the...committee...over the...”

I finally fell silent and lowered my gaze. Celestia stepped forward.

“Shade. You didn’t have any committee meetings today. I told you last night I would cover for you.”

“I...had the day off?”

“Yes. And you still showed up for the meetings.”

“I didn’t-“

“You just sat at the table staring at your hooves. You didn’t even move between meetings! Rain Cloud had to coax you out of the room before dinner. I know it’s been tough. I feel like we all deal with depression to a degree-”

Luna put a hoof on Celestia’s shoulder.

“Perhaps you should let Shade speak.”

Celestia took a deep breath and nodded. Luna looked back at me.

“Shade?”

I looked between the two for a minute. My mind was slowly coming out of its haze. I began to remember bits and pieces of my day and felt my heart drop into my stomach. I had disassociated from everything to a degree I hadn’t thought possible, and it had come back to bite me.

“I can...never...be sorry enough for my behavior. You have a right to be upset with me. I’ll give my resignation now if that’s what will fix this.”

Luna frowned.

“Resignation?! That’s not what we want from you Shade. We want you to take care of yourself! Which is why you should take a break”

Celestia stepped forward, raising my head with her hoof.

“You need to get out of the castle until you’re able to handle everything.”

“You want me to leave?”

“Not permanently. Just...for a little while.”

Luna chimed in.

“We thought you’d like to go back to Ponyville. See your friends. Spend some time with Rarity.”

I looked at each of them, seeing the concern in their eyes. They were genuinely worried about me. I stared at them for a few seconds before sighing.

“Okay. But if the castle falls apart I’m blaming both of you.”

They both smiled and pulled me in for a group hug.

—————————

After all of that, I was left staring out the window at the passing scenery. The train was moving at a swift pace today. I’d be in Ponyville before lunch at this rate.

I reached a hoof over to my bag, making sure the contents were all still there for the tenth time. I’d packed a couple of books, some scrolls, and...

I felt my heartbeat faster as my eyes found that damned bottle. Why had I brought it with me?

You know why.

I shook my head. Discord’s cruelty knew no bounds. I could drink the contents. But then...where would that leave me and Rarity?

I sat, staring at the bottle for several minutes.

“Well? What are you waiting for?”

I felt my teeth grind against each other as I registered the voice’s owner.

“Why do you insist on torturing me with your presence?”

I glanced across the aisle to find Discord sitting on a bench. He smiled.

“I enjoy watching others squirm. And you’re the most entertaining right now.”

A snap of his claws and he was on the bench in front of me.

“Now answer my question. What are you waiting for?”

He motioned to the bottle, and I shut the bag.

“I don’t need it.”

“Of course you do! Why limit yourself to such a short amount of time? You could live for several more centuries with everything in that bottle.”

“Sure. Live to watch everypony I know die. Sounds great!”

“Death comes for all of us either way. Not me of course, but the rest of you.”

“I won’t watch her die.”

“Oh? And aging would prevent that? Rarity could still die before you. Anything can happen in the game of life.”

Another snap and a game board appeared between us. There were pieces that looked like Rarity and me. Discord grabbed both.

“You can stay on your current path. Age, suffer, experience life like the rest of them.”

He moved the pieces along the board. He stopped them at a space labeled ‘Second Breakdown’.

“Oh my! That’s a shame.”

I scowled at the draconequs.

“So I have to learn to deal with this. But if I’m with Rarity, at least I have something worthwhile to live for.”

“Or you could take the path less traveled.”

He placed my piece at the beginning again, this time going off on a different path.

“You drink up, live for centuries, and not worry about silly little things like love.”

That’s when I snapped. I overturned the board and glared at Discord.

“Listen here you heartless, patchwork goat! Maybe you’re fine outlasting everypony, but I’m not! I’ve created a new life. I have friends and ponies I love. Immortality is a waste if there’s nopony to be there with me.”

Discord grinned.

“Well there’s your answer!”

I paused as confusion set in.

“What?”

Discord held out the game pieces.

“Split the bottle. You’d both live for a couple centuries and spend it together.”

I stared at the plastic figures.

“I...I couldn’t...”

Discord sighed and snapped the board and pieces away.

“Food for thought. The decision is still yours either way. But wouldn’t centuries together be better than a lifetime of loneliness?”

He stood up as if to leave. That’s when something clicked in my head. And I began to laugh.

“That’s what this has all been about? You want to know if it’s a viable option?”

Discord looked down at me.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”

I locked eyes with him.

“Using me as a guinea pig won’t make it any easier. You’ll still have to ask the question of yourself. You could try giving up immortality, but I don’t think you’d last five minutes with death lurking around the corner. Or you get the same option as I have. You’ll still wind up having to ask her and you’ll have to deal with whatever answer she gives you.”

I couldn’t react fast enough before I was lifted into the air, my eyes leveling with Discord’s. His pupils seemed to be on fire.

“Listen here you half-breed! I wouldn’t make assumptions in your position.”

A grin grew on my face.

“I think we’ve reached an understanding then. You don’t meddle in my love life. I won’t meddle in yours.”

Discord glared at me for a few seconds, the fire in his eyes slowly dying. He set me down and snapped his claws, still frowning the whole time.

‘POOF’

I looked around, verifying to myself that he was gone. As a sigh left my body, the train began to slow down. Glancing out the window confirmed that we were nearly to the Ponyville station.

Now that I understood Discord’s game, I felt a strange calm set over me. I still felt miserable, but less so. I shook my head to clear it, putting Discord and the bottle to the back of my mind.

“I can do this.”

The train slowed down more until it stopped. I grabbed my bag and exited the car.

Stepping onto the platform, I discovered Rarity and Twilight waiting for me. A small smile crept onto my face.

“Did you miss me?”

Rarity came forward and pulled me into a hug, kissing me on the cheek.

“I’m glad you’re here.”

Twilight approached a moment later.

“I’m so glad to see you Shade. I want you to know I’m here if you need anything. We all will be.”

I looked around the platform.

“The others?”

Twilight shook her head.

“We didn’t tell them yet. I thought you’d want a little privacy. Until you’re ready.”

I nodded my thanks.

“So...do you have room in that castle for me?”

Rarity stepped back.

“Actually, I have a space made up for you at the boutique. There might be a few rogue sequins on the sheets, but I promise it’s comfortable.”

I smiled and hugged her again.

“Thanks.”

Twilight was grinning like a madmare.

“You two are sooo cute!”

I rolled my eyes and felt a genuine smile creep onto my face. It was good to be back in Ponyville. It was good to be home. I shifted my bag into a comfortable position and felt something press against my side. It was the bottle.

Discord meant for me to choose a fate. But as I walked next to Rarity and Twilight, I realized there wasn’t a choice at all. Even if he thought it was a punishment, Discord had given me a gift. I no longer had to worry about being alone. Never again.