Motherhood

by Jade Ring

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Rarity, Fluttershy
Length: 1374

Two old friends have lunch and discuss their children. Nothing strange about that, is there?

Two old friends have lunch and discuss their children. Nothing strange about that, is there?

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A short little scene inspired by the works of Aragon, and Day 2 of the Seventh Anniversary Story Bomb.

Published 2019-04-13 15:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-04-13 15:40:01 UTC

Motherhood

It was just after one on a Wednesday. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and all was right in the world… at least for the time being. Rarity and Fluttershy eased themselves down into their usual seats at the outdoor café they’d made their preferred meeting place and waited patiently for their hostess to approach and take their order. They were in no rush. This was their “girl time,” and they wanted it to last just as long as they could. Their respective husbands had the kids at the park, and the pair of old friends knew they had at least an hour of pure, blessed silence before returning to the absolute circuses their lives had become in the last few years.

A circus they dearly loved, you must understand, but even circuses must have an intermission between the lion-tamer and the trapeze.

The hostess arrived promptly, took their usual order, and scuttled off to the kitchen to ensure it was properly prepared. Rarity lifted a scone from the appetizer tray that the hostess had offered upon her first greeting and took a dainty bite. She relished the flavor for a moment, chewed languidly, and swallowed. She chased the morsel with a sip of tea and sighed in absolute relaxation. “So." she began. "Ruby burned down the guest bedroom last night.”

Fluttershy nodded sympathetically as she chose a scone of her own and applied a thin layer of butter. “Hiccups again?”

Rarity shook her head as she took another sip of tea. “Oh, if only. No, she and her father had a bit of a row about Auntie Twilight’s castle. Again.”

“Oh dear. What did she eat this time?”

“Nothing important. Just the far corner of the east wing. Spike tried to explain to her, once again, that as delicious as Auntie Twilight’s castle looks, it is impolite to snack on it without permission. Ruby talked back, Spike lost his temper, Ruby roared back at him, and the next thing I know the Ponyville Volunteer Fire Brigade is putting out my guest linens.”

Fluttershy gasped. “Not your grandmother’s quilt, I hope?”

Rarity waved her off. “No, thank Celestia. Sweetie Belle took that when she moved to Fillydelphia last year.” The unicorn’s magic lit the nearby tea-pot and lifted it to refill her glass. “It’s going to be rather difficult to explain this to the insurance company…”

Fluttershy nodded sagely. “I know exactly what you mean.”

This, of course, would be an immeasurably incorrect statement for anypony to make… were it coming from anypony else besides Fluttershy. She alone amongst all the creatures of Equestria could come the closest to understanding and empathizing with Rarity’s situation. After all, hadn’t her own little bundle of joy just lost another nanny through circumstances that most would consider to be… less than normal?

Rarity craned her neck to check if the hostess were on her way back just yet. “How goes the search for the new foal-sitter, by the way?”

Fluttershy sighed as she sipped her own tea. “The pool’s getting a bit shallow I'm afraid. The last couple before Miss Sunflower have started to spread the word about some of Eris’ more… imaginative antics.”

Rarity smiled as the hostess finally returned, two bowls of steaming soup floating in her magic. “Eris is a darling filly. If you can’t handle the occasional battle against and an army of animated toys, perhaps you’re in the wrong line of work.”

Fluttershy waited until they were again alone before continuing. “I know. I just wish she’d stop sending them to the cornfield.”

Rarity’s spoonful of soup paused halfway to her mouth as she rolled her eyes. “Oh, what drama queens. It’s not like they don’t come back.” She pursed her lips. “Eventually.”

“I know, but it’s such a long walk. I hate to inconvenience them. And Farmer Pop keeps sending me notes asking why it’s specifically his field Eris keeps sending them to.”

The two settled into comfortable silence as they enjoyed their soup. With impeccable timing, their entrees arrived just as the last spoonful of soup had been polished off. The two mares fell to with gusto. Rarity made a pleasured noise as she swallowed her first bite of daffodil on wheat. “It really is the simple things, isn’t it? I never appreciated the simple joy of a sandwich not dusted with leftover emerald dust before Ruby started on solid foods.”

“At least you aren’t craving gems anymore. I seem to remember you chewing on Twilight’s walls once or twice in your last couple months.” Fluttershy ate another piece of eggplant parmesan and wiped her cheeks free of sauce. “And at least your mealtimes are... somewhat routine. Lately, Eris’ favorite game seems to be ‘What Indescribably Awful Thing Can I Turn This Food into That Will Make Mommy Scream the Loudest?’” She snorted as she cut another piece. “Her father’s no help at all, always laughing while he drinks his glass…”

Rarity raised an eyebrow. “Is she still refusing to drink anything but chocolate milk?”

Fluttershy nodded. “Discord says it’s normal. Something in the genes…” She shuddered. “I’m just glad I’m not having to produce it myself anymore.”

Rarity giggled. “I suppose you’ll just have to take his word for it, darling. It’s not as if there are books for mares like us.”

“Maybe we should write one.”

“As if Twilight hasn’t been casually dropping hints about that for years.” She straightened up and adjusted an imaginary version of the scholarly spectacles the Princess of Friendship had started wearing recently. “’You two have such interesting perspectives. Think of the doors into learning that you’ve opened.’” She blew a small raspberry as he returned to her lunch. “As though we chose to be the mothers of the first hybrids in Equestrian history.”

“You don’t choose who you fall in love with.” Fluttershy agreed with a nod.

Rarity pointed with her fork. “Exactly. The thought of offspring never even crossed my mind while Spike and I were dating. When Ruby popped out, I was as taken aback as poor Nurse Redheart.”

“I know, right?” Fluttershy leaned over the table. “You should’ve seen the look on the doctor’s face when Eris tapped him on the shoulder right after he’d pulled her out.” The two mares shared a laugh and resumed their lunch. When the hostess returned to clear their plates and offer dessert, Fluttershy declined. “I think I’m getting more than enough sweets at home these days.”

Rarity considered before smiling at the hostess. “Just ice cream for me, then. Vanilla, please.”

As the hostess hurried off, Fluttershy glanced at the clock on the wall. “I have to run to the market for a few things. Are we still on for the spa on Saturday?”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world, darling. Will you have found a sitter by then?”

Fluttershy shrugged as the hostess returned with Rarity’s dish of ice cream. “I’m sure Discord won’t mind watching her solo for a while. After all, he’s just introduced her to the wonderful world of pranking.”

“Celestia help us all.” Rarity laughed as she took the first bite of ice cream. She frowned. “Hmm…”

“Something wrong?”

Rarity tapped the spoon against the dish in concentration. “It’s missing something… Ah!” She quickly bent to her saddlebags and began rummaging in their depths. “I’m sure there’s some left from Ruby’s snack the other day.” With a triumphant cry, she levitated out her prize; a small pile of emerald shavings. She quickly sprinkled them over her ice cream and took a bite. She shivered with pleasure as she rolled the melting treat and shining stones around in her mouth. She swallowed and sighed. “Perfect.” Only then did she notice Fluttershy staring at her. “What?”

A small smile tugged at Fluttershy’s lips. She gestured at the bowl. “Craving something?”

Rarity looked at the emerald dusted ice cream as though seeing it for the very first time. Realization struck like lighting. Slowly, her gaze turned towards Ponyville Park… and the location of her very much in trouble husband. “Tell me, Fluttershy; do you neuter dragons?”

Fluttershy snorted. “A little late for that, isn’t it?”

“It’s the thought that counts, darling. It's the thought that counts.”