Twilight takes over Equestria with paperwork

by OverlyAgro

Rating: everyone
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Comedy, Shining Armor, Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia
Length: 1354

Exactly what you think it is.

Little Twilie uses legal work so she doesn't have to make a friend. Celestia is not amused.

Sequel: Chrysalis has a legal battle

Published 2019-03-11 04:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-03-11 04:50:01 UTC

We don't have laws against this?

Celestia was having a particulary good day, the sun was nice and warm, she had just given little Twilie an assignment to make a friend, and even the nobles seemed less stuck up than usual.

She was only listening to the noble finishing up his explaination on why they should raise the taxes for the farmers with one ear, like usual, When she glanced down to see her last appointment for the Day Court.

Name: Twilight Sparkle.
Quick description: Twilight Sparkle will take over Equestria.

"Pen Point?" She asked her secretary after the noblepony had left.

"Yes?" He replied, sorting his papers.

"Are you sure that this is the correct information for the next appointment?"

"Yes princess, Twilight made the appointment herself."

Before the princess could continue questioning Pen Point, one of the two guards at the door announced the next pony.

"Now announcing, Twilight Sparkle, personal student of the princess!"

The door swung open as a tiny lavender filly strode through, Twilie was wearing a set of saddlebags filled to the brim with papers. A large amount of books floating in behinds her. As the doors shut she plopped down and built a book fort.

"Twilie, what are you doing?" Princess Celestia asked.

Twilie replied after having constructed her book fort.

"Princess, these are my papers declaring that this is now my new permanent place of residence." She floated some paperwork from her saddlebags over which the princess promptly directed towards Pen Point.

"What?" The princess replied in puzzlement.

"According to the emergency building materials law made during the housing crisis of 543, a house is allowed to be made out of books, eggs, garden gnomes, and other ponies and can be constructed on property of the state in case of personal housing emergency."

"Wait, what?" The princess asked again.

"The paperwork is properly filled, princess. It is now her new residence until further notice." Replied Pen Point.

The princess's brain decided to start working exclusively in legal negotiaten mode. "But what is your personal housing emergency then?"

"I'm got legally kicked out of the house this morning, princess. And, since I'm not old enough to purchase a house and since I didn't have an adult to sign me in to an orphanage, I was left unable to obtain housing."

The princess's brain spiraled down into confusion "What did you do to get kicked out of your house?"

"Well," Pen Point started "In the paperwork the reasoning her parents gave is that Twilight had asked them to and because she promised to get back home before nightfall."

Twilie cleared her throat and floated some more paperwork towards Pen Point "I declare my residence, an independent nation from Equestria."

"What?" The princess asked as she questioned what she was hearing.

"Well, the paperwork is correct and signed, so the nation of Equestriatm is born today."

"What, but, who signed it?" Asked the princess in bewilderment.

"You did princess, i put it on your desk this morning." Explained Pen Point.

Princess Celestia's thoughts flashed guiltily to the massive piles of paperwork on her desk she had just skimmed over before signing.

"But, how can she just declare that?"

"Well," Pen Point started again "she had the minimum square area down as technically the entire castle now counts as her place of residence by the emergency housing law. There is also no minimum amount of people a country has to have, so only two is just fine. And there is also no age restriction on declaring indepency from the state."

Princess Celestia had to spent a full five seconds before she could form a barely coherent thought again.

"But what about the name? It can't just be the same."

Twilie spoke up "Well, technically, It could have been exactly that, as the name Equestria wasn't copyrighted. Oh that reminds me, Pen Point, could you make an appointment next week for suing Equestria on the grounds of copyright infringement?"

"There's a time slot open at five PM."

Celestia just sat there questioning her sanity.

Twilie spoke up once more "I hereby open the court. Celestia is accused of being guilty of unauthorized entry to Equestriatm. She is judged to be guilty. Her punishment shall be the removal of all her titles, one life time of labor for Twilight Sparkle, and imprisonment in a maximum security book fort." She now floated a pile of paperwork as big as Celestia over to Pen Point.

"What!?" She turned to Pen Point. "Surely none of this is legal?"

"In Equestria it isn't." He replied as a voice coming from a wall of paperwork. "But you are in the castle, also known as the nation of Equestriatm. Equestriatm is a dictatorship and their laws clearly state that all of this is perfectly legal. You should now be getting detained by Equestria'stm head of national security as per tradition."

"But wouldn't this be the first time for this to happen?" Celestia asks while her brain is rebooting.

"Traditions have to start somehow, princess."

The guard at the door announced again. "Now announcing Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and guard-in-training Shining Armor!"

The two of them walked in, with sorry expressions on their faces.

"I'm so sorry, auntie Celestia. I didn't know this would happen! I just gave her a lawbook to distract her!"

"Don't worry Princess," Shining Armor said with a straight back "I've put a coup d'etat in her schedule for tomorrow morning at 8 AM. She's only allowed five minutes, so just levitate her upside-down and she'll immediately surrender Equestriatm back to you."

"Why are you two here!!" The princess yelled in bewilderment.

Shining Armor spoke up first "I'm officially the head of Equestriantm security, so I've come to detain you."

Cadence spoke "Well, after you, I'm officially the ruling princess of Equestria, so I'm here to rule the country."

"Why are you doing this!" Celestia screamed back with bloodshot eyes.

"Twilie used her cutes on me." Explained Cadence first. "I couldn't resist."

"Twilie promised me her desert." Said Shining Armor second.

"Now," Twilight spoke " Equestriatm
formally declares war on Equestria"

Cadence turned towards her. "Twilight Sparkle, I, ruling princess Mi Amore Cadenza, hereby fully surrender the kingdom of Equestria to Equestriatm.

Celestia screeched with the full fury of an angry sun "GUARDS DETAIN THEM!"

Twilie turned toward the guards, levitating the last bit of her paperwork to the mountain of paper that was Pen Point. "By royal decree, I Twilight Sparkle, sole ruler of Equestriatm here by declare today as a national Holiday, meaning that after you put Celestia in the max security book fort, you'll have the rest of the day off."

"The paperwork is sound." Confirmed the voice of Pen Point through the paperwork.

The guards turned to each other. Such a hard decision, choosing between their undying loyalty and getting of the shift ten minutes early.

*-*-*

As Celestia sat in the max security book fort, eating Twilight's brussel sprouts. Twilight gloated through the window.

"Since it's now a national holiday, nopony has to work so I don't have to do that friendship assignment you gave me!"

She turned around, walking away.

"Now I get to do the fun part of being an even dictator!" Celestia could hear her say "The Paperwork."

Celestia just sat there, confused and mad at everything, when one final coherent thought crossed her mind before she passed out from her blood pressure.

"You know, she would make a great princess."

Author's Note

Many years later, in the friendship castle

Starlight had gotten lost in the castle. Again. She was just about to give up all hope of ever finding Spike and getting some coffee when she spotted the doors the doors to the throne room.

"SPIIIKEE!" She yelled as she burst open the doors. "Could you get me some c-CHRYSALIS! What are you doing here!?"

Chrysalis spun around in her office chair. She was wearing a blue suit with a red tie. She spoke up from the insides of her house made from Ponyvile's residents.

"I declare this an independent nation from Equestria."