Trials of Prince Blueblood
Discordant Morning
Previous ChapterThe started like any normal day in a nice warm bed with nothing planned for the morning, though he didn't know the morning was almost done regardless of what happens next. It was his last day before the expedition and Prince Blueblood was going to just relax and not think about what he was going to find. Nope! No thoughts at all on rusty commoner fair or itchy scratchy beds or muddy dirty roads or small biting insects. No such thoughts at all! It was going to be a normal day.
Suppressing a shiver Blueblood pulled the covers over him a little more. After all those things Oddity said - or was it Purity? - and then Auntie Celestia pretty much confirmed that his image needed work. He was the pinnacle of nobility and the world would know but leaving the comfort of the castle seemed... well, cold after stopping to actually think on it. Perhaps even unnecessary. But how to convince commoners otherwise?
Any other thoughts were banished when a maid he had forgotten about opened the curtains spilling undue sunlight directly into his eyes. Groaning and uttering a rather unprincely grunt he sat up. "I thought I had made my wishes quite clear last evening Ginger Ho... eh?"
A strange creature with a goat head wearing a maid outfit turned his/her head around towards him. It spoke in a feminine voice but Blueblood still had doubts. "Oh I am sorry to have disturbed you dear. Is there anything I can do to serve you?"
He gapped for a moment taking the strange creatures appearance in. Finding his voice he made his displeasure known. "Yes! Close those curtains this instant! Due to being new in the royal wing I will forgive and forget this infraction. I must also ask who gave you permis-" He stopped talking when a pair of forehooves wrapped around one of his own.
He looked down to see somepony that caused the hairs on his back to stand straight. A sight to cause his mouth to turn dry with his tongue into sandpaper. Somewhere in the back of his head he noted how ravishing the sight was; It was Curiosity herself! She was laying in his bed in a provocative black lace... outfit? Costume? "Darling, please do be quieter. I am sure this dreadful mess is all a misunderstanding."
With a shrike he surprised himself by jumping out of his bed in a single bound, though landing solely on his rump.
A cry of a foal brought his attention to the other side of the room where a crib sat. Curiosity got up out of bed and made her way over to it. "Oh, Darling! I told you to be quieter, you woke up our son!"
"I-" Beg your pardon?!
Oddity, or was it Rarity? Anyways she picked up a bundle of something and turned around. He stared in mounting horror of the scene before him only now noticing evil cackling off to the side somewhere. The foal himself wasn't scary in the slightest, his white fur went well with his messy two tone blue mane; It was the mother that scared his so as she smiled at him with a slightly deranged smile. "Aw. If I said it once I'll say it again; we made one beautiful colt!"
He bolted from the room. It was a prank, it had to be. "Guards!" He bellowed as he skidded to a stop and turned to face the two guards always stationed outside his doors. What he saw caused his heart to skip a beat.
Both were a perfect clones of Purity in guard armor that was meant to be as provocative as possible. Just what was her name?! Auntie even told me once! The one to his right batted her eyes at me. "Oh darling, there is no need to shout like that. I'll take you with just a soft whisper."
He glanced to his left and was riveted to the sight of the other her slowly removing her armor. She blew him a kiss. It was then he snapped.
"AUNTIE! AUNTIE, I NEED YOU!" He bellowed in his best imitation of the royal canterlot voice as he raced down the halls. It sadly lacked the force but the volume rivaled Luna's on occasion. That occasion was today.
Something in his head clicked. A possible explanation to his current problem and a solution to it as well. He stopped his running to catch his breath. "AUNT LUNA! HELP ME I BEG OF YOU!"
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(meanwhile back in the room)
Discord stood there clutching his sides laughing as Prince Blueblood ran off. The first rarity kept fussing with the foal and discord noted that the rariguards ran off in pursuit of Blueblood. It felt good to be free, it really did.
He wiped a tear out of his eye. "Whew! That hit the spot. Nothing like a good prank to start the day!" He stretched his arms into the air cracking a number of bones. With a content smile he strutted slowly over to the balcony snapping his fingers as he went with the occasional soft chuckle.
Feeling like he forgot something he glanced back at the first rarity and snapped his fingers. Rarity was gone and in her place was Ginger Holly cradling a wash bin and the crib has turned into a cleaning cart. Listing to the left and right she glanced around in a daze. "Huh?"
"Don't worry your head about it." Discord said with another snap of his fingers.
They looked over his handy work, one with a slowly building smirk and the other in close scrutiny. "Hmmm. Sexy maid outfit with an equally erotic cart? Seems too... too... predictable! Ah well; they can't all be winners. Must save the grade A material for the main characters."
He took a step a single step before his eyes zeroed in on her cutie mark which her now scandalous maid uniform revealed; A paintbrush leaving a streak of green on her bronze fur. "Hmmm."
*snap*
Ginger starred at the paint brush in her hooves and the cart loaded with a variety of paints and brushes. Discord walked onto the balcony to the sound of maniacal laughter. "Keep going without me soldier!"
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Ill Omen looked across Canterlot from his perch on what amounted to the Caterlot Castle battlements. He shared his Commander's opinion of how defensible this location was and being one of the few unicorns able to levitate himself at speeds he knew nothing more could really be done. High walls would be flown over by those with wings or even knocked down by the more muscular creatures out there. Then there were the magic users that could just about anything to a fortification. It's best defense besides the mountainside was the bottlenecks and walls too weak to stop and to time consuming to break which leads to bottlenecks. Though none of that helps for a completely air assault. What we could most use is a magic shield, a really big one or multiple segmented shields forming a grid or something. This was pretty much the unicorn capital of Equestria and what do we got to show for it? Cloudsdale is at least unassailable without the ability to walk on clouds or wings to reach it.
Though in light of today any defense seemed inadequate. He watched some cotton candy clouds roll by with chocolate milk splattering on his shield. Below there was a parade of leafy flowers, herbs and vegetables from the scattered gardens in the castle grounds assaulting the castle gates from the inside. Gardeners cooks and confused looking guards were doing their best to stem the tide before they reached the streets. Omen once saw a mismatch creature floating above the 'battle' cackling before it teleported away. The city itself was reasonably untouched, just a few upside down buildings floating; no biggie.
Omen had no intention of joining the guard ponies in trying to contain the madness. His orders that Vigil gave him could be summed up as; 'This is Princess level emergency, end of the world imminent, conserve energy for relief efforts.'
Hearing a sigh to his left he glanced over at Frisky Hooves. She was an earth pony with a white coat and a pastel mane of pink, purple and blue. On her flank was three pawprints, she claimed to be good at taming dogs but he has yet to see her in the company of any nonpony she wasn't trying to kill.
"Bored?" Omen asked wiping some of his grey mane out of his eyes.
"No. Just frustrated. I was in the middle of a full body massage, getting to the good part you know? And just after he mounts me it happens; a line of stallions dance into the bordello with ballerina dresses. He joins them with a dress of his own as they twirl out another door." Frisky ranted on dejectedly. "I didn't think there was that many stallions in the building."
"What you need is a steady special somepony." Midnight stated wearily inching closer to Omen. The vesper had largely given up on using her eyes today and was wearing a sleeping mask over them. Her tuffed ears swiveled around pointing at different sounds, some of which Omen himself never heard. The dark violet with a neon pink blue maned pony was struggling to remain awake for what should be the afternoon.
"Hmm. I suppose I could-" She teased inching closer to Omen
He was saved or ensnared by a large leathery wing. "Mine." Midnight hissed over Omen's back.
"Look at that Omen, she finally voices her feelings for you! Now you just need to seal the deal." Frisky winked at him and he in turn rolled his eyes. Still he couldn't help but smile and leaned into Midnight's embrace.
"Seems like a good day for it." Midnight said sadly nuzzling Omen which he returned.
Frisky scoffed. "Please! We are not all going to die if The Elements..." She tapered off leaving Omen to glance over.
Just a few feet away were a pair of ponies with a pristine white mane and curly fashionable hair. Or at least it was on one of them; the other had helmet hair. One was wearing a rather unique set of armor. If by unique one could mean not being protective and was meant for its wearer to be ogled.
"Have you seen Darling around?" They ask in unison with an unblinking stare.
Ah. "I have not seen him for awhile." They walked off in search of 'darling' and no pony seemed to care.
"I hope those two will be turned back to normal." Frisky watched them go before turning back to the battle below; predictably the royal guard was routed and the green leafy enemy was invading the streets of Canterlot. "Just disgraceful."
"What them? I don't think they can succeed against this, whatever this is. I wish Celestia would increase military spending for a proper trained army. Not a few dozen ponies trained in monster removal." Omen looked out over the horizon and watched as the sky turned pink and the ground was patterned squares of blue and pink. The worst area appeared to be Ponyville. "How is the family during all this?"
"You sure you want to know?" Frisky replied.
Omen's heart skipped a beat. I know that code phrase. "Yes."
Frisky frowned a moment before smiling. "I can't tell you. I can't tell anyling."
"Don't you mean 'anypony'?" Midnight said after a moment of hesitation.
"How ominous." Omen said with a frown of his own letting the odd phrase go unmentioned.
"Yeah well Equestria is doomed if The Elements don't pull out a win. Luna is in no shape to fight this and the family archives state that neither of them can use the elements anymore." Frisky said with a frown and neither Omen or Midnight met her eyes.
"Have either of you met the Elements yet?" Midnight glanced, or rather turned her head in our direction with both ears focused on us.
"Technically, yes. One. Miss Rarity the Generous has several clones running around the castle looking for Blueblood. Oh, and they wrecked the latest Grand Galloping Gala." Frisky said the last happily as if is was a good thing and Omen couldn't help but smile as he once attended a Gala. They were just plain boring.
There was a long silence as the sun dropped and the moon came out. How long this would last they couldn't be sure. Eventually Midnight jerked her head up. "Where is sis?"
"Aurora is with Vigil, and Blueblood, and Celestia. I think Shinning Armor and a few others are present." Omen rattled off what he knew before letting the silence reign again. Discord probably got to them already. Just as he will get to us soonish.
Author's Note
Yeah i know; Dark tag. We'll get there.
With return of Harmony following on the heels of the Gala it seems like such a waste not to include someone with such global reach.
