Reaching For The Stars

By the time I could go back to school, it was the day of the test. In the classroom, a few of the other ponies had distanced themselves from me, even though I knew the most about this particular subject. Aroofa passed out the test and told us that we had only forty minutes to finish it, but that the forty minutes would take us down to the afternoon free period.

I finished the test in about fifteen minutes and spent another five checking over my answers before giving it in to Aroofa. After completing the test, I grabbed my things and left the room, making my way towards the library. I focused more on the new cosmos that were recently discovered in the neighboring galaxies and tried mapping out their coordinates on a map that I brought with me.

“Excuse me, Astral,” somepony called out to me.

I looked up from the table and saw that it was Videe Anna, the principal of the school. I wondered what exactly she was doing here, so I gave my attention to her fully.

“Hello, Principal Videe,” I replied, “What brings you here to the library?”

“Well,” Videe continued, “your mother is here to pick you up early.”

I blinked a couple of times, but quickly packed up my things and rose from the table I was at. Videe escorted me to the front of the school and allowed me to enter the office first, where I saw Mom standing behind one of the desks. Mom smiled happily at me, then came over to me, hugging me slightly. Hugging her back, I exited the office with Mom, then out of the school.

As we were walking through the cleared path, I asked Mom why she picked me up from school early. It wasn’t like her to do such a thing, so I figured that something might be wrong.

“I have something exciting that I wanted you to see,” Mom explained, “and I couldn’t wait for you to come home to show you.”

“Something to show me?” I repeated.

Mom took out a small envelope and gave it to me. I took control of it with my magic and took out a small piece of paper from inside the envelope. It was folded up, so I opened it up and took a closer look to see that it was a letter.

“To whom it may concern,” I read, “we are delighted to inform you that you, Astral Flare, have been accepted into Princess Twilight’s School of Friendship in Ponyville. Classes start at the end of February and will run through the middle of June. We look forward to seeing you soon for your orientation. Yours truly, Princess Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship.”

Mom felt happy. “What do you think, Astral? Sounds pretty good, don’t you think?”

I was stunned. “But what about you?”

“What do you mean, sweetie?” Mom asked in response.

“I mean what about you.” I repeated. “Your magic is not like it used to be and I think you could use my help while I’m here.”

Mom rested a hoof on my back. “Astral, I’m perfectly fine. Nothing bad is going to happen to me. You read it yourself: magic deteriorates as a pony gets older. It just happens naturally.”

I gulped slightly. “But Mom, I think-”

“Please, Astral,” Mom interrupted, “go and make some friends. Show the Astral I know to other ponies for me. I want everypony to know the sweet, little Astral Flare that I know. I know that Princess Twilight will be happy to have a pony like you attending her school. For me?”

I was at a loss for words. I didn't understand why Mom was so determined to get me to make friends. I tried friendship multiple times and each time it blew up in my face. She should know since she spent many nights wiping my eyes and stroking my mane, assuring me that everything would be okay.

I gazed up at her, scanning her aqua blue eyes for any sign that maybe she was bluffing and she wanted me to forget about the school and friendship and just stay here with her. However, I saw no such sign. Instead, I saw eyes that were filled with hope and love as Mom gave me the warmest smile imaginable.

Giving a defeated sigh, I flattened my ears and looked down towards the ground. Every part of me knew how bad of an idea this was and how much I was going to fail and disappoint her. I desperately didn’t want to do this, but chose my mother’s happiness over my own desires.

“....Alright, I'll do it.” I mumbled quietly.

I could practically hear her smile spread across her face as I felt her wrap me up in her hooves.

“Oh sweetie, I just know you're going to have the time of your life and make all sorts of new friends!” She exclaimed, holding me tighter in her embrace.

I forced a smile, trying my best to play the part of an excited mare with a bright future of friendship ahead of me for my mother's sake. Inside, however, I was an emotional wreck. Thoughts of failure began to flood my mind as well as thoughts of all the times I opened myself to others, only to have them turn their backs on me because I wasn't enough.

I spent so many years feeling like I was unwanted by everypony. The only light in my life was Mom since she made it a mission to make me feel anything but unwanted, even though she too had her own personal demons to deal with after my father left us both when I was just a filly.

So how could I up and do the same? More importantly, why was she pushing me to leave her so much?

After a few moments, I felt her pull away from me. I lifted my head up to look towards her, noticing tears falling from her eyes, making me feel just a bit worse. She smiled through her tears, however, as she whispered something that nearly broke my heart.

"You've made an old mare proud," she told me.

I didn't want to admit it, but deep down, I kind of wish that I hadn't. I smiled in response to her and nodded slowly.

"Anything for you, Mom…also you're not that old.” I replied with a smirk, also trying to change the subject.

“You're right, Mom,”She joked, adding her own smirk as well.

I rolled my eyes playfully and chuckled. “Last time I give you a compliment.”

She laughed softly, following it up with a gentle smile. “You know, after an emotional day, I think some ice cream from Icy’s sounds pretty good for dinner tonight, don't you?”

As a young mare about to graduate from the Academy, I knew it would take a lot more than a bowl of ice cream to fix the emotional strain I was feeling presently.

…But right now it was my medicine of choice.

Grinning like a little filly on Hearth's Warming, I nodded. “Only if we can get vanilla double chocolate chip with extra hay sprinkles.”

Chuckling as we began to walk onto the snowy sidewalk, she nodded. “Well, of course! What sane mare wouldn't want that?”

As we started to get closer to Icy Freezeria, I felt a little better as the thoughts from earlier were starting to become a distant memory. I had the reassurance and confidence of my mother, my best friend, with me and that's all I needed.

As long as I have her rooting for me then life wasn't so bad after all.

Once we entered into Icy’s, Mom bought both of us vanilla double chocolate chip ice cream with extra hay sprinkles. Like mother, like daughter, they say, since this was both of our favorite types of ice cream. Sitting down, we started to take a small bite out of the ice cream. I looked to Mom, whom was trying to hold back some laughter.

I cocked an eyebrow as I wondered what she was laughing at. “What’s so funny?”

She lightly tapped her muzzle and then motioned her head towards me. “Oh, nothing too serious, sweetie.”

Confused, I tapped the tip of my muzzle and felt some leftover ice cream on it. I laughed a bit with Mom as I wiped the rest off of my muzzle and continued eating the ice cream. Mom smiled as well, continuing with her ice cream as well.

“Still the funny little filly that you are,” Mom said, taking another bite out of her ice cream.

I rolled my eyes playfully once more as we continued eating our ice cream.

Once we got home, Mom insisted that I started packing and get ready for my trip to the School of Friendship. Slowly walking up the stairs, I got to my room, stopping just in front of the closed door and staring at it. I found that opening it up was much more difficult than it was this time around. Sighing slightly, I lifted my hoof up to the door knob slowly instead of choosing to open it up with my magic.

Come on, Astral, I told myself, you can do this. Just open up the door nice and slowly. You’ve done this a million times. Just turn the knob and open it up.

I slowed my breathing and turned the doorknob slowly, pushing forward the door and opening it up. Stepping inside my room, I slowly began to pack some things up inside a couple of saddlebags that I had. I made sure to take some astrology books, a backup beanie, some books regarding magic spells, and a framed picture of my mom and myself.

I placed the saddlebags on the chair at my desk and stared at them for a little while longer. I really was dreading the inevitable trip to the School of Friendship I had to make, but I also dreaded the fact that if I didn’t go through with this trip and at least give the school a shot, then I’d be letting my own mother down and honestly, I didn’t know which feeling felt worse.

I usually studied until I went to bed, but today, this was different. I didn’t feel like studying today after learning about what will come next for me. I guess Mom figured that something was troubling me, seeing how she came up to my room and knocked on my door softly, asking if she could come inside to talk to me.

Wiping a small tear from my eye, I nodded and responded. “Yes, Mom. You may come inside.”

I watched the door open up slowly, revealing Mom to me. She had the biggest smile on her face as she entered my room and sat down on the bed next to me. She looked ahead, like I was, and started to provide some small talk.

“I’m really proud of you for going through with this, Astral,” she began, “you know that?”

I wanted to respond back with something, but finding the right words to talk back to Mom was harder than I’d thought. Probably realizing this, Mom continued talking to me.

“After everything that’s happened to both of us in our lives,” she said, “I’m so happy to know that you’re giving friendship another chance. I know it hasn’t really panned out in the past, but I just have a feeling that this time is going to be very different, especially with Princess Twilight Sparkle overlooking the whole school.” She paused briefly to wipe away a tear. “I just wish that kind of place was around when I was younger. I know it could have made a huge impact on my life, just like you have.” She turned to me. “You know, you are absolutely the greatest friend...the greatest daughter a mother like me could have ever hoped for. I am extremely happy with how close we’ve gotten over the years. You made me so happy.”

“Then why are you pushing me away?” I asked softly, hoping that I hadn’t said this out loud.

“Because I want to see you really spread your wings in Equestria,” answered Mom. “I know you are a smart, intelligent, sweet, kind little pony and I know that, with the right guidance, you can really make Equestria a much better place.”

I turned to Mom slowly. “Do you really think so?”

She hugged me just like any mother would when it came to supporting their child. “I don’t think so, Astral, I know so. You are my special little pony and I think you have the capability of shining bright in the sky. I know that you can be the brightest star in the galaxy. Take it from me, since stars are higher than the Aurora Borealis.”

Her little joke got me to giggle quietly. I rolled my eyes playfully and nudged her slightly. “Of course you would say something like that, Mom. You always have to add a joke like that at the end of a heartfelt speech like that, you know?”

“How else are we supposed to get back here?” Mom laughed, coughing slightly.

“I don’t know, mother.” I replied, giggling louder.

We looked back at the saddlebags again and sighed in unison. Silence filled the room again as the sun started setting behind the house, casting a shadow on the bags and, eventually, on the ground until it disappeared completely, almost like it symbolized the end of one era and the start of the next.

“You best get to bed,” Mom told me finally. “You have a big day tomorrow.”

I nodded. “Okay, Mom.” I started thinking about the academy I was leaving behind. “What about the school, Mom?”

“Your old one,” Mom asked me, “or the new one?”

“The one I’m leaving behind,” I answered. “Why am I leaving them now?”

“I didn’t think you would mind, Astral,” Mom admitted. “You seemed unhappy with that school and the way things were going. Am I wrong?”

“Well,” I said, thinking about Cat in the process, “I would be leaving behind my teachers and the librarian without a trace. What about them?”

Mom scratched her chin lightly, then looked at me. “Tell you what…” She paused briefly. “I’ll write a letter to them and let them know what will happen and that you’ll be moving to a new school for a little while, how’s that sound?”

I smiled softly and nodded at Mom. “Thanks, Mom. I’d appreciate that very much.”

“Now get some rest,” Mom told me.

“Goodnight Mom,” I said, yawning a bit.

“Goodnight, Astral,” Mom responded, kissing my forehead lightly. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Mom,” I smiled.

Smiling, Mom turned to walk out my room, lightly closing the door behind her. Once I was sure she was gone, I allowed a sigh to escape my lips as I turned to look out of the window. The stars were shining beautifully against Princess Luna's night sky. Tonight would certainly be a great night to study the stars with my telescope, but I just didn't feel like it. Mom was right; I had a long day tomorrow.