Halale KaʻOhana

by DarkSpider

Rating: teen
Tags: Anthro, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Original Character, Comedy, Profanity, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Crossover
Length: 3308

Two guys become 625 and 626 and try cleaning up after Discord.

Ohana, Family. This is biggest, most important thing to Jason and Frank, who end up getting Displaced as E626/Stitch and E625/Reuben respectively. Having Family along is better than be separated. They then learn of the dysfunctional Family made by Discord, so they take it upon themselves to find and fix this broken Family.

Yes. I'm doing this. I do not know why I suddenly wanted to, but I did. This is a collab with my friend Wayward Shadow. Feedback will be appreciated. And know that this won't be as high a priority as SiE for me.

The properties belong to Disney and Hasbro, yadda yadda.

Published 2019-03-28 11:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-03-30 23:11:03 UTC

Chapter 1

“So what's this party about?” A small figure asked its companion in the shadows, the two of them looking at what seemed to be a fancy party a few meters away at a castle. The first figure blinked. “Man this enhanced sight takes some getting used to…”

“Well, with what has happened, we’ll have to,” The other figure said. “And I think this is the Grand Galloping Gala from My Little Pony, although it is hard to tell with the fact that the ponies are more bipedal and have opposable thumbs.”

The first figure blinked before cleaning his ears. “I'm sorry, did you say Grand Galloping Gala? What kind of name is that?”

The second figure facepalmed with a sigh. “This is My Little Pony we’re talking about. This is the world where almost every town and certain nouns are just a bunch of equine themed puns. Think Ponyville?”

The first figure rolled his eyes. “And we ended up here of all places? Seriously?”

“Yes, that guy put us here,” the second figure answered. “But last time I checked, you are more of an on-the-fence brony. So don’t think your masculine levels dropped because of that.”

The first figure looked down at himself. “Not sure that matters anymore.” He said with a shrug. He then started sniffing at the air. “Oh, that smells good. Smells like...cake.” He then started walking towards the party, only to get an arm grabbed by his companion.

“What are you doing?” The second figure asked with a bit of fear in his voice. “Are you seriously wanting us to get caught and possibly get into trouble with the Princesses?”

“Oh come on Frank, what's the big deal? I doubt any of them can notice me. Especially with the size difference,” he added, noting that the ponies did look quite a bit taller than the two of them.

“Alright, but if you get turned to stone by the Two Sisters, I’m not taking responsibility for that, Jason. You will,” Frank said. “And I’ll just look for any sandwiches. Grass or not, I’m sure they’ll be fine to eat.”

Jason looked at the food that was visible to them. “Well doesn't look like it's grass. Though doesn't look like there are sandwiches either. But hey, you do you cos. Imma get me some cake.” With that, Jason dropped down with his arms to the ground and started crawling at a decent speed towards the smell before Frank could stop him.

“Well, when in Rome, do as Romans,” Frank then snuck as quietly and quickly as he could behind his cousin.

“Urgh...why is he so hard to be around? This isn’t how tonight was supposed to go,” Rarity said quietly to herself as she held the door for Prince Blueblood.

“Did you say something?” He asked.

“Nothing, nothing…”

The next thing she knew, she heard her friend Pinkie exclaim “STAGE DIVE!” and a moment later a tall cake was falling towards them, with Blueblood putting Rarity in front of him to shield himself.

Right before the cake landed on her, a red blur came in and caught it. Once she realized what happened, she blinked in shock before looking towards where the cake was now. Right in front of it was a small, blue-furred, koala-like creature with large black eyes, indigo nose, large blue bat-like ears, with tufts of fur on his head. What surprised her was that it had a set of antennae on its had, four arms coming out of its torso, a set of indigo spines on its back, and a red outfit that fit it perfectly.

The small creature didn't seem to pay attention to them as it started stuffing its face with cake, with some of it flying around, and a few pieces even landed on Blueblood.

“Hey!” The white stallion exclaimed before approaching the creature, who stopped eating to stare at him in confusion. “You unkempt little monster! Do you have any idea how long it'll take to wash my coat from this trash?”

The creature blinked before swallowing the cake in its mouth and looked back at the treat in front of it as it waved a clawed paw at Blueblood as if to shoo him and said something that sounded like complete gibberish before resuming its meal.

Blueblood blinked in astonishment, as if confused the creature was ignoring him. “Do you know who I am?” Blueblood asked, the creature tilting its head in confusion when it looked at him again. “I am Prince Blueblood. And I am not gonna be ignored and dirtied by some small stray!”

The creature rose an eyebrow at him before blinking. It then letting out a mischievous snicker before pulling its head back. Before Blueblood could figure out what it was doing, it shot its head forward and launch a large gob of its green saliva at his face.

Blueblood immediately backed away in shock and disgust. “Ew! Ewewewewewew!” He repeated until he backed into a statue, causing it to topple over. The next moment, Rainbow flew in and caught the statue as it fell.

Meanwhile, sitting on one of the snack tables, was a golden yellow chubby koala/marmot-like creature, with a big head with short ears that flop down at the sides of its head, big black eyes, three small antennae that look like a tuft of fluffy fur, bright yellow stomach, chest and around its eyes, dark yellow toes, big red nose, pointed fingers, short stumpy legs, hourglass-shaped marking on its back and two flat buck teeth sticking out of his mouth and overlapping its bottom lip. Said creature was munching on some small lettuce sandwiches from a tray he was holding, while watching the chaos of Best Night Ever unfold. “Well, I can’t say that that ‘prince’ didn’t deserve that. Jason did some good in my book.”

Just then, a door opened and he saw Celestia and Twilight coming in, both with a slightly shocked expression. When Celestia looked over the room, her gazed stopped on Frank. Without needing to think twice, he jumped off the table with the tray and ran to his cousin as fast as he could. “Jason, we need to leave, now!” Frank said with urgency, tugging on one of his arms. “One of the Princesses are here and we need to be gone before we go stone!”

Before Jason can say anything, the room started to shake before a bunch of animals burst in through a door with a yellow pegasus came in with a crazed look in her eyes and shouting about loving her. Jason immediately lifted Frank over his head with his upper arms and ran like mad out of the building.

“Woah! Careful! I’m not as durable as you are!” Frank yelled as Jason carried him out of the castle ground and through the city until they arrived at an alleyway, where Jason put him down.

“Sorry about that,” Jason said. “Just...did not wanna deal with whatever that was about…” He then shivered in fright. “Who exactly was that and should we be worried?”

“That was Fluttershy,” Frank said. “Normally she is a kind pony. However, in that instant, she snapped and went a little crazy because some of the animals there weren’t used to her presence.”

Jason rose an eyebrow. “Really? She goes nuts just because a bunch of animals don't listen to her?”

“Well, she is used to animals being comfortable around her,” Frank pointed out. “The fact that they weren’t used to her presence should have been a big clue to not go drastic as she did.” He then sighed and gave Jason a slight grin. “So, how was the cake and giving Blueblood the spitshine treatment?”

Jason let out a chuckle. “The cake was good. But that prissy guy? I loved what I did. Seriously though, what's the deal with him? Besides having a stick so far up his ass that I'm surprised he can walk straight.”

“Eh, Blueblood is just a stereotypical spoiled noble, unless he was acting that way so that certain people don’t take him seriously,” Frank said with a shrug. “So, where are we currently in relation to the castle?”

Jason shrugged. “How should I know? I was just focusing on getting as far away from that yellow pegasus as I can.”

“Well...let me try something,” Frank said. He then took a few sniffs of the air before sighing. “I think I smell donuts.” He peeked around a corner just as a door opened and then closed. “No promises, but I think this is Donut Joe’s shop.”

Jason stared at him with a deadpan expression. “What is with the names here?”

“The more you ask about it, the more I’m gonna have to remind you, this is My Little Pony. Names like that are commonplace here,” Frank reiterated. “If they hear our names, or the names of who we now became, they’d say what you said about their names.”

Jason rolled his eyes before he simply walked to the door and entered the building. “Yeah yeah, whatever. Still sound stupid tho-” Jason immediately froze when he saw who were in the donut shop a few tables away.

Frank entered the shop behind Jason and took a look at the situation, seeing that Jason was staring at the Mane 6, Spike, and Celestia, who were staring back. With a shrug, Frank said, “Your hole to climb out of, buddy. I’ll translate, but nothing else.” Frank then took a seat at on an empty table. “And no donut order until I have an income, okay, Joe?” Joe only nodded and returned to his work behind the counter.

Author's Note

Yeah. This is a thing now. Had the idea the other day while thinking about Lilo & Stitch for reasons I don't remember. But yeah, a collab between me and Wayward Shadow. I write for Jason, he writes for Frank.

Wayward Shadow here. Dark had the idea, I just helped him go forward with it and I could probably be considered a co-author now, right?

Yeah, that's all he said. But yeah, hope you like it.
-Dark

Chapter 2

The nervous stalemate was going strong for about 5-ish minutes. When Princess Celestia gave a short cough, Jason jumped in fright and made an attempt to run back out the door. However, he was encased in a golden glow and was stopped in his tracks.

“What the hell?” Jason said before the aura lifted him and pulled him towards the group until he was at eye level with Celestia while upside down, her horn and one of her hands in a matching aura. “Hey, put me down!”

“And why should I put you down?” Celestia responded, shocking both Jason and Frank. “With how you tried to run when I simply coughed, I don’t think letting you go is a good idea. Especially since I want to talk to you two.”

“Huh, I didn’t know you knew Tantalog,” Frank said with awe in his voice. “This makes things easier for me.”

“Tant-what?” Rainbow asked, with all the others looking at the princess and new creatures in confusion.

Jason simply looked at Celestia with a tilted head. “How can you know Tantalog?”

“With how long I’ve lived, the question shouldn’t be, ‘How do I know something?’” Celestia said. “The question instead should be ‘How do I not know something?’”

“I get the feeling that there’s more to this than we all are currently allowed to know,” Frank commented, to which Celestia simply nodded.

Jason nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it's pretty suspicious you know an alien language that shouldn't even be known about in this universe, let alone understood by any of you locals.”

Applejack, not having understood a thing that Jason said, looked to Frank. “So what exactly are you? Some kind of weird koala things?”

“That easily describes what we look like, but not what we are,” Frank said, scratching the back of his head. “What we really are, are genetic experiments of great power, but our minds keep that power in check.”

“Illegal genetic experiments, made to bring chaos and destruction across the universe,” Jason added before shrugging. “Or at least that's what we became.”

Frank translated what Jason said to the others in the room, but quickly added, “And by him saying that last bit, we were another species entirely until some loony of a merchant or shopkeeper, I can’t remember which, offered us to be sent to a new world as what we were dressed as. We thought he was a few pennies short of a dollar, so we humored him and accepted. And from there, you could probably easily guess what happened next.”

“In hindsight, we should've known something was up when he asked us what he should tell our families,” Jason said while crossing both pairs of arms. Frank gave a quick translation, which still confused the group.

“Umm…So, what are you going to do now, if you don’t mind me asking?” Fluttershy asked, hiding behind her hair a bit.

“Well, so far the plan sits at Step 1: Get here. Step 2:...” Frank said nothing for a few seconds before continuing. “Step 3: Profit!”

Jason rolled his eyes before reaching into one of his pockets and pulling out a yellow and orange blaster and shooting at Frank, barely missing him and causing a hole in the wall where the shot hit. Frank ducked and jumped off the table in reaction. “Watch it! I don’t think Joe would like us to get thrown out before we even have a chance to eat here because you decided to get trigger happy!”

“Don't do pointless South Park references and I won't have to do that,” Jason said without looking at Frank as he returned the blaster where it was. “As for the question?” He shrugged. “Hell if we know. Not like we have anything to do.”

“Summary translation, he hates the joke I made, and he pretty much repeated what I said, but not steps, just saying we have nothing to do,” Frank explained to the shy pegasus as he climbed back onto the table. “Any further questions before we let the Princess herself decide our fates?”

“Decide our fates? We did nothing wrong. All I did was retaliate at that guy for insulting me. And even then, I didn't hurt him.”

“Well, we did technically sneak into the Gala without an invitation or ticket, not to mention the fact that the pony you spit up on was actually a prince and would probably want to press charges on that alone,” Frank listed off. “And let’s not forget that you practically said we have nothing to do, so if she points us in a direction, we can figure something out in the way she points us.”

Jason scratched his head. “Can you press charges if the person isn't even a citizen?”

“I’m not sure how accurate I will be when saying this, but I’m sure he would press charges against a blade of grass for simply existing,” Frank said, looking to Celestia for confirmation. She simply rolled her eyes and nodded in annoyed agreement. “So pressing charges against a non-citizen of Equestria would be within his realm of possibility.”

Jason groaned. “Who was the idiot who made him prince?”

“His bloodline,” Celestia said. “I won’t bore you with the details of said bloodline, but as of currently, outside of state meetings, he’s doesn’t know a thing about reality. He tried hitting on my sister after a thousand year banishment, not realizing that he was trying to romance his many greats aunt!”

Jason blinked as the rest of the ponies and Spike leaned away from Celestia before shaking his head. “I feel so sorry for you.”

“Thank you, but I believe we need to get to the question that your friend asked,” she said, looking to the Mane 6. “Any further questions for these two?”

Rainbow shrugged. “What exactly can they do?”

Jason put a claw on his chin. “Well we can lift stuff up to 3,000 times our size, fireproof, bullet proof, nigh indestructible really, can breathe in space, see in the dark, telescopic vision, enhanced hearing, climb walls, think faster than a supercomputer, and retract our extra limbs.” After a few seconds he shrugged. “And that's all I can remember right now.”

Frank translated and added, “The biggest differences between the two of us, outside of what we look like, is that I’m a bit lazy and less durable than he is.”

“And can speak English already.”

“Yeah, that too,” Frank said nonchalantly. “Any more questions?”

“Why is your friend the only one in an outfit?” Rarity said.

Jason looked down (up?) at his suit and chuckled to himself. “I came here in this. Most well known outfit Stitch ever wore. Which is kind of strange since he only wore it for about 10 minutes in the whole franchise.”

After Frank translated, Pinkie spoke up. “Who’s Stitch?”

“Experiment 626. The best of the genetic experiments who actually have a heart. That's who I became,” Jason said, soundly proud. “Though everyone better knows him as Stitch.”

Frank translated and added, “And I became Experiment 625. In basics, I’m pretty much Stitch, but a more lazy personality and a love of sandwiches attached. My guy is also better known as Reuben.”

“You mean like the sandwich reuben?” Pinkie asked.

“Yes, actually,” Frank said. “Honestly, how do you know about that? Aren’t ponies herbivores?”

“Actually, ponies are omnivores,” Twilight said with a confused expression on her face. “We just find plants more tasty than meats, and we can even live without meat if we wanted to.”

“Huh...well, the more you know,” Frank said with a shrug.

“...now what?”

“What do you mean?” Celestia asked, turning Jason right side up in her magic.

“Now what?” Jason repeated. “We told you we have nothing to do now we're here and looks like you don't have anymore questions.”

“True enough,” Celestia said. “Twilight, you and your friends return to Ponyville. I’ll accommodate these two here in Canterlot. I do need to repay at least Stitch for giving my many greats nephew a good dose of karma.”

“Jason,” he corrected. “Just because I became Stitch doesn't mean I'm changing my name. I should at least keep something of my old life.”

“Amen to that,” Frank said. “I’m Frank.”

“At least I properly know both of your names,” Celestia said. “I’m gonna set you down and say my goodbyes to my student and her friends. Please don’t run off.” She then set him down and stood up and gave hugs to Twilight, Spike, and their friends.

Frank got off the table and stood next to Jason. “Well, life is going to get interesting from here on out.” Jason simply nodded in agreement. After Celestia said her goodbyes, she opened the door of the donut shop and let everyone out. When Jason and Frank exited, she beckoned for them to wait. She then closed her eyes and lit up her horn, and in a flash of light, all three of them vanished from the donut shop.

Inside the shop, Donut Joe shook his head and thought, ‘Those two will bring a heck of a lot of trouble. Maybe not on purpose, but still…’

Author's Note

And done. So they properly met the M6 and Celestia. And I just realized that the ponies never even introduced themselves. Huh... Well anyway, the ponies learned about the Displaced and the Displaced learned a few things about the world they're in. Next chapter, who knows what happens. I just know they'll meet a certain character. Until next time.
-Dark

P.S. Thanks for all the likes and favs for the story. I hope we don't let you guys down.