The Murder of Innocence

Twilight Sparkle heaved into the toilet, the sight still fresh within her mind's eye too much to handle. Princess Celestia held the young Alicorn, making sure to hold the young Sparkle's mane back.

"How did her uterus end up in the oven....hrrrauuuuugh?!!!!!" Twilight lamented unto the porcelain god before gifting the deity the bile that was in her stomach.

"Indeed, I also would inquire if there is significance to the number '666' that was carved on the inside of Ms. Pie's eyeball. Or the words 'HAHA' that were scrawled over the entirety of the wall in her feces, or why there was semen inside the multiple holes that had been made throughout her body. Truly a gruesome way to die." Celestia continued, her statement causing another bought of bilious discharge from her former student, ending with Twilight's dry heaves shaking the young mare's body.

A knock came upon the bathroom door, a low melodious voice drifting in.

"How is she doing, Tia? Methinks young Twilight has given way more in her offering then she went in there with. You might want to make sure she doesn't burn her throat on the bile or dehydrate. You know, like what happened to you after your first public execution. The one were the noose caused the mare's head to separate from her body and spray you from head to hooves in offal."

Celestia turned green at the memory. "Move over Twilight dear, I have my own offering to give."

Gathered around the friendship map, the remainder of the Mane 6 sat in shocked silence. Two of Celestia's special investigation ponies, both in black suits and ties, looked lost among the Heroines, unsure of where or how to begin. Finally, one of the detectives spoke.

"I am Detective Cumulus and this is Detective Kickback, We are terribly sorry for your loss but we would like to ask you a few questions. The sooner we do this the sooner we can move on to other parts of the investigation."

Clearing his throat, Detective Cumulus continued. "As Princess Twilight will not be able to join us, we can take her statement when she's recovered. So for now, why don't we go around the table clockwise, starting with Ms. Apple. Do you know of anyone that would wish Ill of Ms. Pie?"

Applejack looked up at the two detectives, biting off her angry words like a particularly sour apple, she sighed.

"The villians she helped defeat for one. We have had a whole slew of adventures after all. But other then them no. Everyone liked Pinkie. Yes, she could be..... difficult, but I honestly can't think of anyone that would hate her enough to kill her."

Detective Kickback spoke up, "Even with her frequent Pranking?"

Applejack narrowed her eyes, but replied. "Yes, even with her Pranking. No one was ever really mad about that because if you got her she accepted it. Hell, she might even congratulate you on a prank well pulled."

Nodding his head, Cumulus interjected, "No need to get defensive Ms. Apple, we're just trying to establish motive."

Applejack snorted in amusement, "Just telling like it was, ain't nothin defensive on that."

The two detectives glanced at each other. Silence stretched as each silently queiried the other with eye motions and head movments. Finally, after about 10 minutes of this, Cumulus continued the questioning.

"Did Ms. Pie appear unusually depressed or scared recently? Was she in any kind of financial distress?"

The element of Honesty shook her head. "You kidding me? Pinkie was the happiest she'd ever been. Her and Cheese Sandwich were going to go in on a business venture together. As for financial distress? Girl was loaded.
She was an equal partner in Sugar Cube Corner and had invested in businesses all over ponyville. Hell, she was even one of my biggest investors."

Detective Kickback looked over the gathered mares, then asked, "How many of you is that true of?"

Rarity, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash all raised their hands.

Whistling in surprise, Detective Kickback stated, "That's a whole lot of Bits. Who is her beneficiary?"

All four of the mares glanced at each other. Rarity was the one who rose.

"Spike? Can you come in here please?"

The Detectives glanced at each other, "What does my question have to do with Princess Twilight Sparkle's Pet Dragon?" Detective Kickback stuttered.

All four mares lasered in on the doomed Unicorn detective. Cumulus wisely took a step to the side, leaving his partner standing alone.

"Princess Sparkle's Dragon," Rarity sneered, "Happens to be our business manager and lawyer. He's been Twilight's assistant for most of his life, which by extension meant a life within academia and the halls of power. Spike has several doctorates which include, but are not limitted to, Political Science. Abnormal Psychology, Arcanism, Alchemy, and Medicine. He's a fully certified Lawyer with the Royal Equestrian Legal Board in civil, criminal and contract law. He is also a fully certified Paramedic and has his Mechanical Engineering masters. Apparently the move to Ponyville meant he couldn't finish that last one. He technically also knows as much about magical theory as Twilight does and fully understands it. I would hope that you can remember that."

Rainbow snorted, picking up where Rarity left off. "Not to mention the little guy has been help us all this time too. At this point he probably has the equivalent of my Weather Studies Bachelors, and picked up some of my awesome weather instincts to boot. Which combined with the nerd stuff that Twilight stuffs down his throat means he's my backup in stopping the Arcane storms that form over the Everfree. Those Weather Wards, that he designed by himself, are nearly as awesome as me.

Fluttershy glowered upon Detective Kickback, unleashing the full stare unto the speciest detective she finished what her friends had started. "Spike coordinates all of the running of our businesses while we are off saving the world. When he accompanies us our businesses suffer for it. But within a week he has them running smoothly and profitably again. Spike is more than 'Princess Sparkles Pet Dragon.' He is a valued friend and assisstant to us all. I am terrified of dragons, I have never been afraid of Spike, nor will I ever will be. He's a better being than somepony that judges based on species of birth ever will be. You can leave, go and think about what you just said."

Detective Kickback wilted under the glare enhanced words of the three heroines of Equestria before him. Turning he fled out into ponyville, leaving a vaguely yellow, vinegar smelling puddle on the floor.

Detective Culumnos moved forward to continue his questioning, but a low, deep baritone interrupted him.

"I believe that my Clients can not answer that question as Pinkie wanted the beneficiary to remain anonymous."

A tall, chiseled dragon walked into the room. Well muscled and lean of build. He wore a pair of slender fit, black cargo pants, tailored for his lithe frame. He wore a fuschia polo, the sleeves rolled up to reveal long, thin, toned arms. Extending one of his clawed hands to greet Detective Culumnos, he introduced himself.

"Prince Spike Sparkle, Duke of Ponyville at your service. I hope that the attitudes of Detective Kickback does not reflect the attitudes of the greater Ponyville police force. I'd hate to have to start a civil trial against the town I grew up in. It would get awkward way to quickly."

Spike let the threat drop of as he shook the Detective's hand. Releasing the Detective from his grip, he looked down upon the much shorter Pegasus before continuing, "Oh, I apologize! I do hope I didn't hurt your hand. Sometimes I don't know my own strength. After all, I am my mother's Pet Dragon, after all."

Snarling the last words and letting smoke blow out his nose, Spike watched as Detective Culumnous considered his words.

"I assure you, Duke Sparkle that Detective Kickback will be properly dealt with on my return to the precinct. He's from Canterlot, not Ponyville, his attitudes most certainly do not reflect anything that the Ponyville Police force represent, believe, or otherwise allow to flourish within our ranks. The only thing I can say in his defense is that while in Canterlot he did enforce the law equally. It was that commitment to the law that got him the post here."

Spike chuckled, "So he pissed off the nobles huh? Good, tell him if he apologizes to my face the next time he sees me, as well as to the mares at this table, then I will in no way hold anything against him. Now, since you have no further questions, I suggest you leave my clients and I to our mourning. I wish you luck in the investigation and if you have any further questions please direct them to me. I will be more than happy to make sure that the girls are well represented in assisting the police in all matters."

Looking up at the Purple and green Dragon before him, Culumnus smirked. "I'll show myself out then. Good to know you grew up right Spike. I'll be in touch with any information I have."

Bowing respectfully to the Mane 6, the brown trenchcoat wearing Pegasus bumbled out the door. As he left, Spike sighed. "Alright Girls, Mom is just about done getting sick and she should be ready to tell you what she has planned shortly. And for further reference, do not let yourselves get questioned by the police without my presence. The police force needs someone to blame on this one. They can't afford to look stupid. Problem is that it's unprecedented for a Murder to happen in this day and age. The resources and training don't exist in this world anymore."

"What is dear Twilight planning Spikey," Rarity queried the dragon, batting her eyes at the dragon as she leaned forward. Giving Spike a more than ample view of what she kept under her shirt. "Surely, you can tell us."

"Sorry Rares, if you got Sweetie, AB, or Scoots to ask that way, I might let Mom's plan slip. But you're 5 years to late on that one. Ship has sailed." Spike said, not unkindly.

Rarity flushed lightly as she leaned back, "Well can't blame a girl for trying, can you?"

"No we can not!" Rainbow and Applejack both concurred, eyeing the handsome beefcake before them.

Spike deadpanned at the girls. "Seriously! None of you were interested till I wasn't."

"That was before puberty, Spikey Wikey." Rarity clarified.

"Heh. Yeah, now you've all grown up." Dash teased.

"Hey, Sister's share things, right?" Applejack queried.

"That they do." Rarity throatily growled.

Spike threw his hand over his ears, "Not Listening! LALALALALALALA!

The three older mares winked at each other.

"We still got it darlings."

"Oh yeah, we're still Awesome!"

"My Apple Pie Ain't dried out yet!"