Author's Note
I dropped watching mlp a while back, but I found this short story lost among my phone notes. It's not a very original story, nor is it particularly insightful, but I thought it was sad that I took the time to write it without showing it to anyone. As I said, I've been away from mlp for quite a while, so the characters are probably a bit different than in the current canon.
Also, I don't know anything about chess.
A game of chess
"Pawn to e4."
"Pawn to e5," Sunset replied as she levitated her piece on the chessboard. "Go easy on me, Sparky. I'm still rusty," she said playfully.
"The point is to see just how rusty you are." Twilight smiled. "Queen to h5."
"Oh, come on, Twi! Hitting me with the classics. I might be rusty, but I'm not stupid enough to get taken out by a basic scholar's mate." Sunset complained in an overly fake offended tone.
"Well, it was worth a try. And of course, I don't think you're stupid. I was pretty sure you would avoid that one." The princess assured with a content smile.
"Well, thanks for the vote of confidence, princess."
The castle was exceptionally quiet today, Spike was away, and only the two mares playing chess were present. They kept going for a few more minutes, exchanging blows and bantering in a friendly manner. The two ponies were experienced players and used all of their resources to keep the other on the edge of their seats. An inexperienced eye wouldn't know who had the advantage, but an expert could see that Twilight had a slight but noticeable edge. She had to thank Starlight and their occasional games that kept her in decent shape.
Sunset smirked. "Sheesh, princess. Not holding back, I see? Could you give this peasant a rest? You know my tiny evil brain cannot keep up with the intellectual feats of her Majesty the Princess of Friendship," she declaimed in her best imitation of Rarity's extreme dramatic antics.
There was an awkward pause. Twilight raised one of her eyebrows. Sunset's attempt at a joke did not seem to be working on her. The alicorn grew a frown and suddenly lost herself in deep thoughts. She started to make circles with her hoof and avoided looking directly into her friend's eyes. She kept giving glances at Sunset, sometimes opening and closing her mouth, as if she was considering saying something but was holding back at the last second.
All the while, Sunset looked at her expectantly with a raised eyebrow of her own.
Twilight took a deep sigh.
"Sunset, are you ok?" The purple pony finally blurted out.
Sunset looked taken aback. "huh? What do you mean?"
"It's just the way you talk about yourself."
"I was just joking before," she said with a giggle.
"Yes, I know. But why do you always make yourself the butt of the joke? It's so constant; it's like you insist on making fun of yourself."
It was Sunset's turn to frown. She shrugged. "It's okay and even healthy to laugh at yourself from time to time. I don't think it's that big a deal."
Twilight hesitated. She wasn't sure that this was the right moment for a psychological analysis of her friend's self-deprecating behavior. But then she also decided that there would probably never be a perfect moment. She wouldn't just brush it off, despite how uncomfortable it would make her and Sunset feel.
"I don't know; I want you to tell me, Sunset. You always seem to slip in a mean comment about yourself when we're having a discussion. And even if you pass them off as jokes, it always feels like you believe in at least a little bit of what you say."
Sunset tssked and replied in her best impression of Rainbow Dash, not missing a beat: "That's just not true. I love myself! I'm awesome" She shook her head and added a goofy smile for good measure.
But a somewhat fake grin and overly enthusiastic tone aren't enough to convince Twilight Sparkle.
She threw the yellow unicorn a skeptical look. "Sunset. I don't want to push the issue too much, but I'm slightly worried about you. Even with the questionable jokes aside, the way you behave sometimes..." the purple alicorn mumbled, worry showing in her voice.
"Well, you shouldn't. I'm a grown-up mare; I don't need your concern." Sunset moved a pawn with her magic. "Now make your move. It's your turn." she politely, but sharply, informed Twilight.
Twilight sighed once more. "Sunset, it feels like this is something important, something we need to talk about..."
"The only thing you're helping right now is my growing anxiety, "Sunset whined. "I like myself and the way I am right now," she repeated with what she assumed was an assertive and confident voice.
Twilight lowered her head. "If you say so, Sunset," she whispered, the disappointment in her voice evident.
The game of chess resumed for a few seconds. Twilight stared Sunset in the eyes, an inquiring look on her face.
"Quit it, Twilight."
"I'm sorry, what?" asked the confused alicorn.
"Stop looking at me like that."
"Like what?"
"Like I just got kicked to the moon by Celestia!" Sunset shouted.
"I... I mean, it was a mirror, but it's not far off from what happened..."
"TWILIGHT!"
"So—sorry... I'm just worried..." she stammered.
"Yeah? Well, it's no use. I'm perfectly fine." Sunset reassured Twilight, although a bit abruptly.
"Are you sure? I know this is a touchy subject, but I'm always available to talk if you need..."
"Of course you are! I know!" Sunset interrupted frantically. "Thank you, princess, but I'm fine. Can we go back to the game and forget about this silly discussion?" she almost begged, eyes wide, a drop of sweat dripping from her temple.
Twilight pressed her eyebrows together. She took a more formal voice and spoke in a clear self-assured fashion to remind her friend that she knew how to handle such matters. "Sunset, this is obviously causing you a lot of distress. And as your friend, I would feel bad leaving you like this without even addressing the issue..."
But she couldn't finish her sentence before Sunset stood up on her four hooves, looking more than frustrated.
"Twilight, stop! That's enough! You can't force me to talk about stuff that I don't want to talk about! Issues that don't even exist! Now, I know you're goody-four-hooves Princess Twilight, and you need to make sure everyone feels wonderful in your perfect little world. But I could do without you patronizing me!" she shouted in one breath. "Your turn," she informed sharply.
Twilight stayed silent for a moment, disturbed by the very sudden outburst of the yellow unicorn before her. "Sunny, would it be so hard to talk to me? We're friends. I won't judge you," the purple pony finally suggested. She put on a small smile to try and ease her friend's temper.
But her proposition only seemed to do the exact opposite of what she intended.
"You never stop, do you? Do people ever say 'no' to you? Did you ever learn when to drop an issue!" the reformed unicorn exclaimed.
"So there is an issue?" retorted twilight matter-of-factly.
Sunset only looked Twilight menacingly.
Twilight tried to put a reassuring hoof on her friend, "Sunny..."
Sunset slapped Twilight's hoof off her own.
"Don't touch me!" she barked. Twilight winced. "Stop it! If you are my friend, then stop what you're doing and let me just enjoy that simple game of chess!"
Twilight was getting more and more panicked by the unicorn's violent reaction. She realized too late that it was no use pushing the issue. "I... Okay, I understand." She stumbled on her words, trying to find the right thing to say. "But please remember—"
Once again, she was cut short. "Remember that I'm here for you? That I can always count on you? I know how the speech goes! Please, princess, keep it for your gullible subjects! You can't help everyone all the time! I'm already doing good on my own. I made friends, and I'm working hard to lead a decent life! I don't need you to tell me what I must do!"
At this point, Sunset was panting. The two ponies became silent. Sunset took some time to regain her composure, a little embarrassed about losing her temper in such a manner.
She dropped her gaze to the ground, a pained look on her face. When she finally spoke, her voice was barely louder than a whisper.
"I can't accept your help."
"Why?" Twilight asked soothingly.
Another silence. "Because... Because I don't feel like I deserve it," the former villain responded. "I know it's stupid, and it's not like I don't trust you. I can't quite explain it myself, but I'd feel bad complaining to you about the way I feel. Especially when I'm the one who tried to hurt you. It just seems unfair that you should have to be the one to listen."
"Sunset..." Twilight's despair was increasing each second as she was trying to find the words to ease her friend's pain.
Sunset Shimmer stayed silent. She looked at the board of chess. A sad smile slowly made its way on her face. She levitated a pawn.
"Checkmate princess... Your loss."
