On The Consequences of Maybe Not Thinking This Through
“Sunset…” Twilight, her face soft and her eyes wavering, cupped Sunset’s face and leaned in as she spoke. Sunset wasn’t sure what she was seeing in her friend’s eyes. Nervousness, affection… and sadness. “I need you… I need you to know… it’s… not like that.”
Then Twilight kissed her, and it all quickly became a blur afterwards.
Sunset came awake as usual, with the sun. As usual her back was stiff. Not as per usual, there was someone else in the bed with her.
Sunset looked to her left, bathed in the glow of the morning sun and covered only by a sheet, was Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship.
Cautiously, Sunset reached out a hand and brushed aside a strand of hair from Twilight’s face. Twilight seemed to smile in response, several things happening all at once inside Sunset. Her face flushed, heart picked up in pace, and her stomach did… about six things that she wasn’t ready to sort out.
So, it wasn’t a dream…
Sunset smiled… then, another thought hit her.
It wasn’t a dream.
She smacked herself in the face.
It wasn’t a dream. That actually happened.
Twilight grimaced and rolled over, taking the rest of the sheet with her.
“Spike…” she muttered. “Tell Celestia to turn off the sun.”
Despite herself, Sunset laughed.
“Hey, Twilight…”
Twilight burrowed her head beneath Sunset’s only pillow.
“No talking. Coffee first…”
Sunset shook her head and smiled.
“Alright, Princess.”
“Thanks, Spike…”
“You’re welcome…” Sunset turned to get out of bed and realized there was a slight problem. Namely, she was naked and her apartment didn’t really have… walls dividing it.
After a moment she realized that she had long since moved past that point of no return, hauled herself out of bed, and went to find her pajamas and get the coffee started.
Twilight woke up, as is proper, to the smell of coffee. She opened her eyes and discovered, as was not proper, the light of the sun was trying its best to do a Sonic Rainboom straight through her skull. She threw her hands up and-
Hands! Not hooves! Where - that - oh - where’s Sunset?
She looked around.
“Sunset?”
“Down here, Twilight. Making some breakfast. I put some clothes up there for you.”
Clothes? Why - oh - right. Clothes.
Twilight set herself to work getting dressed while the sounds and smells of breakfast rose up from beneath her. As soon as she was dressed, she bounded down the steps and rounded around under the loft to see Sunset standing over a hot plate, working at something in a frying pan.
A smile split Twilight’s face and she walked up and kissed Sunset right on the cheek and gave her biggest grin.
I kissed her! Just like that! I feel so…
Sunset jumped with a start when Twilight pulled away. Twilight watched as Sunset’s mouth jumped to startled. Then confused. Then…
Afraid?
Sunset’s lips fell into a small, lopsided smile, but her eyes remained wide and her body tense.
Twilight’s smile faltered a bit.
“Hey, Twi. Um, French toast is gonna be ready in a sec.”
Twilight tried smiling again.
“Right. See you in a second, then?”
“Okay.”
Twilight turned and went to go wait on the couch across the room from the kitchenette. She tried to keep smiling.
It… worked… didn’t it?
Breakfast smelled and tasted delicious. The atmosphere in the room though, left something to be desired.
Sunset sat across the coffee table from Twilight in a worn down plastic chair while the other girl hunched over the couch. Sunset hadn’t said much, and seemed to spend more time between bites chewing over something in her head rather than the food on her fork. Twilight started with smiles, but each glance up from her plate shifted her face from hopeful expectation to increasingly nervous pensiveness.
Suddenly, Sunset put her plate down and let out a sigh.
“Twilight, I think I’m gonna burst if we don’t talk.”
Twilight let out a breath.
“Me too.”
“Alright, so… what happened last night?”
Twilight fidgeted uncomfortably.
“We… had sex?”
Sunset facepalmed with a groan.
“Yes, I know that, but I don’t know why. I also don’t know why it happened the way it did. You haven’t even said you were into me before last night, then you come over here saying it would be a sleep over and then you keep talking about our friends and how I need to stick up for myself - then suddenly you’re kissing me and we’re on my bed and you have your hand halfway up my-” Sunset snapped her mouth shut suddenly, her eyes going wide as her face shifted from orange to red.
“I mean… you enjoyed it, right?”
Sunset leaned back and rubbed her shoulders as she hugged herself.
“Yeah, Twilight… it was amazing. I’ve never felt so-” Her face tightened and she looked away. Her face slackened quickly and she stared into the distance as she continued. “I don’t know why it happened though and it scares me.”
Twilight began twisting her fingers together, her eyes shifting from side to side.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I Sunset?”
Sunset sighed and smiled, trying to relax.
“No, Twi. I’m just confused. Sorry if that’s freaking you out.”
“No - I mean - this was all -” Twilight ran her hands down her face , “ - UGH!”
“Hey, Twilight.” Sunset was suddenly next to her, hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay. We’re big fillies right? Just take a deep breath and start from the beginning.
Twilight sat up straight, reached her arm out and breathed in; arcing her arm to her chest as she did so, then reversed the motion as she exhaled. She opened her eyes and seemed a little more relaxed.
“You good?” Sunset smiled.
“Better.” Twilight smiled back.
“Okay.” Sunset stood back up. “So, what happened?”
Twilight looked ahead and nodded, seeming to steel herself.
“I was trying to help you.”
“I…” The rest of the sentence fell silently out of Sunset’s open mouth. She turned her head and squinted at Twilight. “How?”
“Well, I was talking with Rarity - my Rarity - and I told her about what was going on, and she suggested you just needed a suitor. That that would boost your confidence -”
Sunset’s expression darkened but Twilight went on, oblivious.
“ - so, I looked it up and turns out there’s a fair bit of research supporting that hypothesis. Apparently, ponies tend to show all kinds of mental and physical improvements when they recieve romantic affection, especially in regards to self worth-”
“Yeah, Twilight, if they’re receiving actual romantic affection.”
“I mean -”
“No, Twilight, you just said it. You banged me to fix a friendship problem - a friendship problem I keep telling you doesn’t exist!”
“Sunset, you keep telling me about the way people treat you and how guilty you feel -”
“Yeah, because I turned into a raging she-demon!”
Twilight suddenly got a hard look in her eyes.
“Sunset, in a matter of six seconds you went from being unable to even pretend to physically hurt someone to get what you wanted most in the world, to trying to kill people and the only thing that changed was trying to put on that crown. Does that seem like a realistic mood switch to you?!” Twilight threw out her arm to punctuate her statement and Sunset took a step back, her mouth working silently.
“I mean, that doesn’t -”
“Do you treat the other me this way?”
“I - what?”
“Do you berate her and tell her to roll over because she deserves to be remembered for her mistakes?”
“No, that’s not -”
“How is it not, Sunset? Because you keep telling me how much you relate to her and want to protect her from what you went through but you don’t afford yourself that same protection.”
Sunset looked like she was backed into a corner.
“I still brought Equestria magic here and it’s hurting people, Twilight.”
“Really? Did you ever test and prove that hypothesis?”
“I mean -”
“Because Occracoke’s Razor suggests that the near total cross planar collapse that the other me caused would be the more likely suspect.”
Sunset deflated.
“The Sirens still came after our magic and nearly took over the world.”
“They came after the magic I brought.” Twilight leaned back and looked away. “Plus, they wouldn’t even be here if it weren’t for Starswirl.” She huffed. “Honestly, after the Memory Stone thing I’ve been meaning to ask him about the habit he and his students had of dumping dangerous magical threats in other dimensions.”
Sunset collapsed back into her chair and curled into a ball, hugging her legs to her chest. She looked very, very small.
“I just thought you loved me.”
Twilight stopped short.
Oh no. I messed up.
Sunset raised her head to Twilight, looking exhausted.
“Do you?”
Twilight was frozen.
Oh no. No nonono. This was stupid, Twilight. What have you done?
Sunset waited for an answer.
How could you be this stu -
Twilight stopped herself short.
Raised her arm, drawing it in as she breathed in and moving it back out as she exhaled.
You’re the Princess of Friendship. Time to fix this friendship problem.
That just left the answer. Twilight was quiet. Sunset was waiting but Twilight could see her body tighten as the silence drew on. Twilight’s eyes drifted across the coffee table and, just like that, she saw the answer.
She stood up, grabbed something off the table and kneeled before Sunset.
“I screwed up, Sunset.” Twilight smiled. “I really didn’t think this through.”
Sunset chuckled weakly.
“Yeah, you’re telling me.” Her eyes looked scared.
“I… I think I know the answer but I think it would be best for us to find that out… together…”
Twilight smiled, and held out her hand to Sunset.
Wrapped between her fingers, revealing the pendant resting in the center of her palm. It was the geode necklace which gave Sunset acces to her magic in this world.
Sunset looked up into Twilight’s eyes and saw hope.
She reached out and took Twilight’s hand, and her eyes went white as she and Twilight fell into a world of memory.
Sunset saw herself. She saw herself standing in that old magenta and black getup. She saw her own proud smile. She felt Twilight’s determination. She saw herself before the mirror, lowering that hammer. She felt Twilight’s relief… and her faith. Her faith that Sunset had always been a good person. She saw herself broken and sobbing, crawling out of that crator. She felt Twilight’s hope and her warmth as she reached down to pull her out of the hole; both the physical one and the one she had fallen into in her mind.
She saw herself, standing and afraid as all the school glared at her after she’d wrecked the Rainbooms’ set. She felt Twilight’s confusion but she also felt it quickly turn to pain as she watched from Twilight’s eyes; the look of terror and shame that had been plastered on her own face. She saw herself in Pinkie’s kitchen. She felt Twilight’s slowly rising panic and despair as she failed to construct the countersong everyone needed her to do. She heard their voices sync up and felt as Twilight relaxed because, even if everything else was going to hell, she knew she had someone in her corner. Someone who understood and was looking out for her.
She saw herself, standing on a field, the sky rust orange with a sick glow as the dragon-like sirens moved overhead in a death circle. She felt Twilight’s desperation, and then her hope as her eyes fell on Sunset. She felt her heart soar as Sunset cast off her shame and began to sing. She felt Twilight’s heart soar, and the strength she took from Sunset’s hand as she pulled Twilight from the ground. She felt how invincible Twilight felt, knowing Sunset was there and that when the two of them were together, no one could stop them.
She saw herself hundreds of more times. She saw herself, outlined in the sunset as she leaned against the dome on the school’s roof. She felt how Twilight’s breath had been taken away in that moment. How… perfect she looked in her own confidence. She saw herself, strumming away at the guitar, nodding her head as she mouthed the lyrics she was working on. How content in her work she looked in that moment, the relaxed focus she brought to bear.
She saw herself standing over a table, bubbling chemicals and magical foci scattered across it. Sunset watched herself as she leaned forward and put a single drop in the vial which, after some shaking, changed purple. She watched herself pump a fist in goofy, nerdy, triumph, and listened as she and Twilight babbled on about the implications of the result. She heard how confident and intelligent and clever she had sounded, and felt how perfectly at ease Twilight felt in her presence, free to work as hard as she could with someone who could keep pace.
Sunset also felt what Twilight felt as they rewatched each memory. How each one made the answer they both knew was coming more certain, and how that made each following memory more sharp.
She also saw different visions of herself. She saw herself tense for just a moment when someone mentioned her being a raging she-demon and then roll it off with a smile. She watched her own eyes tighten as she told Twilight how she felt responsible for this or that person going mad under the influence of magic. She watched the sadness in her own eyes, the tears distantly pushing to get out as she deflected all of her friends turning on her the instant they had even a remote suspicion because hey, it’s not like she hadn’t earned it.
She felt the stab of reflexive pain in Twilight each time and the need to somehow reach out and push her love and affection into Sunset to heal her. Sunset also felt the helplessness Twilight experienced when she knew she couldn’t. She felt Twilight’s drive to do something. Something to make her happy as she studied over books based on an offhand comment from Rarity. She felt Twilight’s determination as she stood before Sunset’s door, ready to go to a place that scared her if she needed to, just so Sunset would know the truth; the truth that she was worthy of love.
Sunset saw all this and more. Finally she saw the freshest memory. It stung Twilight to see it too. It was Sunset, her face lit with moonlight, helpless and vulnerable and, for a moment, afraid under Twilight, but her eyes shone with hope and love. She felt how Twilight had smiled back, alone in the world with Sunset and she felt how Twilight had treasured that sight and would not have traded it for anything.
Sunset and Twilight fell out of the world of memory and back into Sunset’s living room. The former looked down into Twilight’s eyes and, uncertain what else to do, gave a small, lopsided grin.
Twilight leapt into her arms and hugged her tight.
“I think it’s ‘yes.’” She whispered into Sunset’s ear.
“Yeah, I got that.” Sunset chuckled.
She didn’t really know what to do. It had all been so much. So, she decided to just let go for the moment and wrap her arms around Twilight, letting herself rest in Twilight’s warmth.
“I did mess up though, didn’t I?” Twilight went on.
“It’s been a bit fast, and a bit much all at once.” Sunset replied.
“I bet.”
“Did I really pony up when I…?”
“Yep.” Twilight giggled. “I thought it was cute.”
“Oh god, you would.”
Sunset felt a little more at ease, hugging her back.
“What do you mean by that?”
“You tell me, you seduced an alien.”
“We’re the same species!”
“Yeah, but I’ve gone native. You just visit on some weekends.”
Twilight nuzzled into Sunset as she laughed.
“I’m gonna have to do that more often.”
“Yeah, guess you will.” Sunset smiled into Twilight’s neck.
The two stayed there, alone together, listening to each other’s breath and enjoying the feeling of being close to another person who loved and protected them.
Then suddenly Twilight seized up.
“Oh no.”
“‘Oh no’ what?”
“What are we going to tell Celestia?”
Sunset laughed.
“How about we leave out the…?”
“The everything, Sunset. The everything. Oh no, if she ever found out, I’d die of embarrassment on the spot.”
Sunset hugged her tighter.
“It’s okay, Twi. You know why?”
“Why’s that?”
“Because you’ve got me, remember?”
Twilight paused, then laughed.
“Oh, yeah, duh.”
“Yeah…”
Sunset held her tighter, more confident than ever that this was the right choice for the both of them as the sun rose over the city around them.
