Cozy Glow's Friendship School for Villainous evil-doers

by DemonWriterX

Rating: everyone
Tags: Queen Chrysalis, Cozy Glow, Adventure, Tirek, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 2316

Cozy Glow has a problem. She has to somehow convince a centaur and a changling to work together.

"Let's try this again."
Cozy Glow sighed as she flapped her wings to stay afloat in the air. She frowned at the mess beneath her as two grown adults bicker like foals fighting over a swing set in a park. Again, it was up to her to be rational and patient. If she doesn't make Tirek and Chrysalis get along soon, they would have to face Grogar's wrath and she would like to avoid him as much as she can. She learned all the friendship fundamentals of Friendship in Twilight's school, if she can do it, Cozy Glow can do it better.

Published 2019-04-09 08:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-04-10 21:45:52 UTC

Lesson 1: Compliments

Lesson 1: Compliments

"Let's try this again."

Cozy Glow sighed as she flapped her wings to stay afloat in the air. She frowned at the mess beneath her as two grown adults bicker like foals fighting over a swing set in a park. Again, it was up to her to be rational and patient. If she doesn't make Tirek and Chrysalis get along soon, they would have to face Grogar's wrath and she would like to avoid him as much as she can. She realized that being friends with a powerful being like Grogar will be beneficial in her plans to become the Empress of Friendship but to accomplish that goal, she had to make Tirek and Chrysalis get along better. Cozy Glow learned all the fundamentals of Friendship in Twilight's school, if Twilight can do it, Cozy Glow can do it better.

"Bah! Now I see why your "precious" changelings left you!" Tirek began, pointing a finger at Queen Chrysalis who looked like she was ready to bite it off. "Just spending over a minute in your presence is enough to drive anypony mad!"

"Ha!" Chrysalis said, taking a step forward. "And I can see why you were defeated, even with all the power you had, you couldn't fix that small mind of yours, stupidity must run amok in your kind!"

"Careful Chrissy." Tirek sneered, taking a step towards her. "Unless you want more holes in your collection." He said, gesturing to her body.

"You will address me as Queen Chrysalis!- unless you want to see the real power of my wrath, Tirek!" She hissed as her horn grew to a threatening pallet of green energy.

"It is Lord Tirek! You incompetent bug!"

Cozy Glow swiftly flew in-between them with her hooves out. "That's enough!"

"Stay out of it, brat!" Chrysalis said, stomping her hoof down as she glared at Tirek.

Tirek cracked his knuckles and growled. "Yes. I have my own lesson to teach."

Cozy Glow eye twitched. She tried to be rational. She tried to be patient. But now, she needed to be...assertive. She quickly grabbed Tirek's beard with one hoof and grabbed Chysalis's mane with her other and yanked them closer to her. Her eyes narrowed at the two.

"Listen to me." She said in a stern and low voice. Tirek and Chrysalis both went still once they heard it."I need you two to start trying to get along. Unless, you want grumpy old Grogar to know how much you two are failing in my friendship lessons...and you don't want Mister Grogar to know, do you?" she said in a sweet and lovable voice, making her eyes large for only a moment before they went cold. The sudden shift made even Tirek gulp. "Can you imagine what he might do to you two if you don't manage to play nice? Why, golly, he might even destroy the two of you. And we don't want that now, do we?"

Queen Chrysalis and Lord Tirek exchanged glances, which made Cozy Glow yank down harshly making them yell out in pain.

"N-No! We do not!" Tirek said with a groan.

"Yes! I mean-No! We do not!" Chrysalis said, nodding her head.

"Good." Cozy Glow let them go. Tirek clutched at his beard in slight pain as Chrysalis massaged her scalp. Cozy Glow took a deep, calming breath and let out a long breath of air. Her attitude immediately went up as she giggled at the two of them. She put out her hooves and gestured at the two. "Now come on, hold eachother's claw and hoof, we are going to make a friendship circle! Won't that be fun?" She said in a cheerful tone. Tirek and Chysalis both rolled their eyes and adamantly took eachother's hoof and claw, while also holding Cozy's small hooves.

"Wowie! You two are doing great so far! Now, I'll say something nice about Centaurs, Tirek, you will say something nice about Changlings and Chrysalis, you will say something nice about ponies." She cleared her throat and turned to Tirek. "I really like your horns, they are very big and very pointy!"

Tirek couldn't help but cringe at her but didn't want to risk seeing her...malicious side. "T-thank you?" He muttered.

Cozy Glow smiled. "Okay, your turn. What do you like about Chrysalis?"

Tirek turned and forcefully had to bite his tongue to avoid making a rude comment about her appearance. Instead he thought of the opposite. "Queen Chrysalis. I...really..." He sputtered, trying to force his tongue to say the words, it pained him on the inside. "I really...like...your!" He groaned, struggling to say the right words. Queen Chrysalis narrowed her eyes boredly at him as Cozy Glow urged him on.

"Come on, Tirek...I know you can do it!"

"I! really like your....eyes!" He let out a gasp, as if he was nearly drowning. She arched a brow at Tirek.

"My eyes? really?" She let out a snort, which made Cozy whirl at her. She immediately bit her lower lip when she saw Cozy's permanent smile but was really gritting her teeth.

"Just take the Com.Pla.Ment." She said.

Queen Chrysalis let out a sigh. "Yes. T-thank you. L-lord Tirek. And I...really-" She winced as if somepony punched into her chest. "Like Cozy's..p-pretty!" She sputtered the words like a broken sprinkler. Lord Tirek moved his head slightly aback to avoid the spit. "Curls!" She let out a deflated sigh as Cozy Glow gave them a small applause.

"Yay! you two did it! Now...didn't that feel nice?" Tirek and Chrysalis crossed their arms, turning their backs away from each other as they muttered under their breaths. Cozy Glow shrugged. "Eh. It's a start. Friendship does take time to develop, luckily..." She grabbed the two of them by the shoulders, bringing them into a group hug. But, Tirek and Chrysalis both felt a thrustful grip over their throats as the filly looped her arms around them. She let out a large grin across her face. "We have all the time in the world."

Author's Note

I decided to make short little drabbles about the legion of doom. I hope you like it so far.

Lesson 2: Playing games together

Tirek rubbed his temple in anguish as he walked through Grogar’s halls with Cozy Glow trailing behind him. She was trotting along, running her mouth and saying nonsensical things about her day and what “friendship” plans she had waiting for them. It will send anypony spiraling but not him. He learned how to tune her out and every so often caught about every third word. After spending months in Tartarus with her, he learned to adjust in fear of going mad. It actually gave him a benefit. Now he can sit through anything she put him through with unimpressed boredom. All he had to do was imagine a happy place, like conquering Equestria. He realized that no matter what he does, Cozy Glow would continue to follow him. She took his insults as a joke, she was unfazed by his terror and even ignoring her proved to be nothing but encouraging her. He managed to accept her “friendship” into his new routine.

“Tirek? Didn’t you hear what I just said?” Cozy Glow asked, appearing suddenly in front of his face. He gave her a frown, followed by a sigh.

“You said you wanted to make friendship bracelets or something idiotic, along those lines?” He replied, rolling his wrist and waving her away like a common fly as he continued with his walk.

“Oh, well I guess you were listening.” Cozy Glow let out a giggle as she followed. “Hey! That’s a breakthrough in friendship!”

“Really?” he said with a long droll.

“Yeah! Listening to your friends! They taught it in Twilight’s stupid friendship school.”

“Oh.” He stopped and face-palmed, dragging his face down in a torturous state. “How wonderful!”

“Yup! So ready to make some bracelets? I could only find some straw, sticks and rocks, but you got to work with what you got.” Tirek furrowed his eyebrows making Cozy Glow appear beside his head. “Ooor...we can practice some magic?”

Tirek glanced at her, and hummed in thought. He stroked his beard. He did needed to practice. With the limited power he has now, he might as well see what he can do with it.

“What do you have in mind?”

Cozy Glow grinned mischievously. Tirek learned that Cozy Glow is like a coin. She has two sides that she can flip to with ease. Her nauseating sweet side and her manipulative and malicious side. ‘Want to play some shot put?”

“Shot put? Yes. Now that is more like it.” Tirek smiled, baring his fangs.

“Great!” Cozy Glow cheered, zipping down the hall. “I know just the place, it’s where Chrysalis is hanging out.”

“Oh no.” Tirek groaned, making Cozy Glow stop and look back at him.

“What’s the matter?”

“Perhaps there is another area. Somewhere far away from that bug.”

“Huh.” Cozy blinked.

“What is it now?” He said, dropping his arms in defeat.

“I didn’t know “Lord” Tirek was afraid of a changling.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I learn something new everyday.”

Tirek huffed and stomped his way towards the filly. “I am not afraid of her.”

“Look, I get it. She’s creepy.” Cozy said, crossing her arms. Tirek gritted his teeth as if he was afraid of a lowly bug and to think that a child believed he was struck with terror! Ha! “But don’t worry, your secret is safe with me, best friend.” Cozy said, putting her arm around his neck. He swiftly flicked her away.

“I am not afraid, now show me where you planned on taking me.”

Cozy Glow straightened herself and gave him a smile. “Okey dokey! It’s right this way!”
—————————————————————-

Queen Chrysalis was sitting by the bog surrounding Grogar’s fortress. There were many trees emerging from the swamp water and mossy green plants that provided cover. It was quiet and secluded. Her horn let out a glow as she beamed into a log, creating another wooden changling for her collection. She sighed as she set it down beside her.

“Once my partnership with Grogar and those other two idiots is finished. I will take back my subjects and rule once again!...” she turned to her log subjects and scowled. “It is only a temporary partnership, why are you asking those idiotic questions? You are created to obey not question!” She slapped the log aside as punishment for its insolence.

“Still talking to inanimate objects, Chrissy?”

Queen Chrysalis whirled and found Tirek and Cozy Glow, who was sitting on his shoulder like a parrot. She bit the inside of her cheek and snarled.

“What are you two doing here?” She demanded, ignoring Tirek’s snide comment.

“We are going to play shot put!” Cozy Glow said, diving down and snatching up one of her log subjects. “Hope you don’t mind-“

“Actually I do! Now get out of here or I will-!”

Tirek ignored her and shouted. “Launch!” Causing Cozy Glow to throw the log up in the air. Tirek immediately shot out a red and destructive beam, landing right onto the log, completely and utterly destroying it into a cloud of ash.

“Oooo!” Cozy Glow exclaimed. “Nice shot!”

Tirek chuckled, rubbing his knuckles on his chest. “It was extremely easy.”

“Hey!” Queen Chrysalis went to her hooves, stomping her hoof on the ground. “Leave me in peace, now!”

Tirek snorted and crossed his arms. “You do not own this land, thus I can do whatever I wish.”

Chrysalis growled, making her horn glow threateningly at the centaur. Cozy Glow intervened by appearing in front of her.

“Why don’t you join us? Spending time together is the best way to become friends.”

“I rather drink bog water.” Chrysalis responded with a snap.

“Come on, pleeeeese?” Cozy Glow said making her eyes go large and cheeks big. Chrysalis gagged at the sight of her something that made Cozy frown. “Fine. Be that way. I just wanted to see just how powerful changling magic is, but I guess, it’s nothing really special, right?” She said, blinking her eyes much too innocently.

Chrysalis laughed. “My magic far surpasses any creature! Even Tirek’s!”

“Please, do not embarrass yourself.” Tirek replied, moving Cozy Glow away as he faced Chrysalis. “Yours is as average as any unicorn. Mine is far superior.”

“You wish! All you have is “borrowed” power, nothing you never earned!”

Cozy Glow clapped her hooves excitedly. “Let’s have a competition! Then we can see for sure!” She zipped next to Tirek and whispered. “But I’ll secretly cheer for you, best friend.”

Tirek put out his hand, placed it over Cozy’s face and pushed her away at arm’s length.

“A competition is a grand idea.” Tirek said. “What says you, your majesty?” He said with a grin. Chrysalis narrowed her eyes but let out a smirk.

“Yes...let us do a competition, just be prepared to gawk at my excellence!”

“Yes, your “excellent” failure! Cozy Glow grab one of those logs!”

“You got it!” Cozy snatched up another log and stood in front of the two. “Okay, on my count.” Tirek and Chrysalis warmed up their magic as they readied themselves. “3...2...1…Launch!” And she threw the log high up in the air. Two beams of magic instantly hit the log making it light up like a firework. Cozy hummed.

“Alright. That one is a tie, let’s try it again.” She zipped away to find another log, leaving the two alone. Tirek gave her a smirk.

“Well I am surprised, looks like you can aim.”

Chrysalis let out a chuckle. “And I’m surprised you can still see with your old age.”

“With age comes Wisdom, and with wisdom, power.”

“That. I can agree with.”

“Okay found one!” Cozy zipped back as saw the two ready themselves again. “Launch!”