The Reeducation of Equestrian Society

by Fallowsthorn

Rating: mature
Tags: Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Sex, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Princess Luna, Porn, Fetish
Length: 3111

Luna is appalled to discover that most of the populace, following Celestia's example, thinks of sex as sinful instead of celebrating it. She sets out to fix that, starting with the boss mare herself.

This fic is disavowed. That means I don't consider it up to my current standards of writing and I have no immediate plans to fix it. I am leaving it online for the sake of those who liked it and/or want to link to it, and because it was an entry for a contest and I was paid to write it, but I don't consider it a good example of my work.

After Luna has recovered from the purging of Nightmare Moon, she is both shocked and appalled to discover that in her absence, Celestia has turned the entire nation into a bunch of frigid prudes. She embarks on a quest to restore Equestria to its rightful state of ethical sluttery, starting with the mare herself.

Written for the April 2019 Sibling Incest Contest.

Tags/Kinks/Keywords: f/f, lesbian, oral sex, cunnilingus, humor, romance, incest, princest, first draft, not beta read we die like mne, ykinmk but I can still pretend it is long enough to write something for it, honestly not super happy with this but less happy with the prospect of fixing it

Published 2019-04-14 20:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-04-14 20:20:01 UTC

The Reeducation of Equestrian Society

High Beam turned the corner of his patrol route through the castle, expecting nothing out of the ordinary. It was three in the morning on a quiet Tuesday night, and it was only the constant movement that kept Beam from dozing off where he stood. True, Princess Luna had returned, and she kept a nocturnal schedule, so by necessity so did half the castle staff, but everyone who'd been lucky enough to get a job in the palace was a consummate professional.

Which is why, when he saw two servants having a ferocious yet hushed argument just outside one of the smaller libraries, he was surprised enough to actually do a double take. He hurried toward them, mindful to keep his voice down. "What's going on?"

One of the servants, Feather Duster, grimaced. "Her Majesty has been looking up old laws and getting more and more, um... not pleased."

"And I say that doesn't matter!" said the other servant, an older stallion High Beam wasn’t familiar with. "You have a duty to the Princess! You can't let some foalish fear get in the way of that."

"Then you go in and ask if she wants anything," Feather shot back. "At least then it won't be my head she bites off!"

"Do you know what she's actually upset about?" High Beam asked. "It could just be having to read a thousand years of law records. That's no mean feat."

Feather and the stallion exchanged glances. Then they looked at High Beam. Then back at each other. Then back at High Beam.

"Say," said Feather. "You could--"

She was cut off by the sound of the door unlatching and the slight creak of hinges as it swung open. Princess Luna stood on the other side of it, looking truly peeved. "You there, High Beam, Sorbet Ice! I wish to see you kiss as well as you can!"

All three ponies stood there like mice in an open field.

"Um," said High Beam, throwing Sorbet a panicked look and seeing it mirrored on the other stallion's face. "Um."

Luna sighed and put one silver-shod hoof to her face. "No, no, forgive me, I should not have said that. It is not something to demand of one unsuspecting, far less so one obliged to serve. You may do as you will."

"Princess?" Feather Duster tried. "Is everything alright?"

"Nay, but you are neither the cause nor the means of resolution," Luna said. She still looked troubled, but no longer as thunderous. "Tell me, what is the state of sexual education?"

Feather blinked, but recovered admirably. "Um, usually after a foal gets their cutie mark their parents take them aside and explain, you know, it. And then of course unofficially they learn most of it from each other, rumors and such. At least, I did. Um, sorry?" she added, seeing Luna's frown.

Luna held up a hoof. "Calm yourself. It is not you with whom I am displeased. That is not quite what I had meant, but I suspect your answer reveals much more by implication. There is nothing for adults?"

"Why would adults need sex ed?" Sorbet asked. "Er, Your Majesty."

Luna didn’t answer. "What of contraception, then?"

"What's contraception?" asked High Beam.

Feather, meanwhile, had blushed a deep red. "There's... I heard there's a berry that you can eat that makes males, um, it makes a foal not happen," she half-whispered. "Or if he, um...."

Luna stared at them, nonplussed. "And if a couple does not desire a foal, what do they do?"

"With all due respect, Your Majesty, if you aren't prepared for a foal, you shouldn't be having sex," Sorbet said severely. "Er, the general 'you', that is, I would never suggest--"

Luna waved this off. "And when it does happen, and the mare becomes pregnant, what does she do?"

Sorbet curled his lip the slightest bit. "I imagine the harlot is--"

CRACK.

High Beam and Feather Duster stared at Luna, mouths agape. Sorbet's head had been thrown to the side with the force of her slap. A hoofprint was slowly forming on his cheek. Calmly, evenly, Luna said, "If thou speakest such of any mare again, I will geld thee."

Sorbet bowed deeply and stiffly. "Of course, Your Majesty. A thousand pardons."

"There's orphanages," High Beam volunteered nervously. "Or, plenty of foals are adopted, I guess. There's a law that if you can't care for a foal, you can leave the infant at a hospital or with any city guard, and no one will blame you."

Feather fidgeted, clearly shaken but trying not to show it. "Um, I heard there are... there are...." She squeezed her eyes shut, then stepped up to Luna and whispered in her ear.

Luna's other ear twitched, and her frown deepened as she listened. When Feather stepped away, she nodded seriously. "Thank you for the information. This is... worse than I had imagined, reading the legal texts. You three are dismissed to your other duties." She walked past them.

"Princess?" High Beam asked. "Where are you going?"

Luna didn't look back. "I have some questions for my sister, and I suspect I will be very interested in the answers."

Luna didn't bother knocking. "Celestia!" she bellowed, flinging the bedroom door open. "What in Faust's name hast thou done to our country?"

"Hmvuph," Celestia said. She took her face out of her pillow and tried again. "What? Luna, it's the middle of the night."

"Hadn't noticed," Luna growled. "Outlawing polyamorous marriage? A culture that blames mares for falling pregnant? Equestria has become a nation of narrow-minded, uneducated prudes!"

Celestia put her head back down. Maybe if she couldn't see Luna her sister would stop existing. "This couldn't wait until breakfast?"

Luna leapt up on Celestia's bed, hooves to either side of her body. "No! It has waited far too long already, and I note thou didst not tell me of this development before I had to find out for myself. How many ponies think themselves evil for perfectly natural things?"

Celestia sat up. "What? Look, just because you don't see ponies having sex on the street corner, it doesn't mean they're--"

"Thy guard knoweth not what a contraceptive is," Luna spat. "Am I to believe he is exceptionally stupid?"

"What actually happened?"

Luna related her conversation with the three citizens. By the end, Celestia's face had gone from indignant to resigned and exasperated. When Luna finished speaking, she tipped her head back and groaned. "Fucking Sol Invictus. The laws are their fault, I never would have approved banning any kind of marriage between consenting adults. Was it from about seven hundred years ago?" Luna nodded. Celestia rubbed her temple with a hoof. "Dammit. I tried a whole -- parliament thing, I was drowning in paperwork, but it basically turned into ponies buying laws. It was a mess. I thought I undid all their bullshit but I knew I must have missed some and I just didn't have time."

Luna blinked. Celestia had just sworn more in the last five sentences than in the five months Luna had been living in Canterlot. That, more than anything, convinced her Celestia was telling the truth and not just trying to cover her cutie marks. "And the culture?"

Celestia was silent. She pulled her hooves out from under the covers and tucked them underneath her, and looked down and away from Luna. "That... may have been my fault," she said reluctantly.

Luna furrowed her brow, but it was in concern rather than censure. "Tia?"

Celestia closed her eyes. "I didn't say anything, I just... after I had to... I just didn't want to anymore. It felt hollow. How dare I lark about having fun when you were gone? When I had all but killed the one I loved most? And then I suppose I thought it would fade, after a time. I was prepared to hate myself for betraying you, but it never...." She trailed off.

"And our actions are not just our own," Luna said. She bent her head to nuzzle Celestia's cheek. "And dost thou feel this emptiness still?"

"No." Celestia produced a smile, albeit a slightly watery one. "You're back. You’re you. That's all I ever wanted. I love you so much."

"And I, thee." Luna pressed a kiss to Celestia's jaw. "Let me show thee how."

Celestia pulled back and shot her a sly look. "What, you're not going to drag me out to the palace steps in the middle of the afternoon?"

Luna laughed, low and rich and dark as chocolate. "Worry not, I plan to. But for now...." She kissed Celestia's forehead, just below her horn. "...I would like...." The bridge of her muzzle. "...to reacquaint us...." The very tip of her nose, where the kiss became a tiny nibble. "...personally."

Celestia was done waiting. She pounced.

Luna laughed as Celestia flipped them, pinning Luna to the bed. Celestia slotted their mouths together, and the laughter became a moan. "Mm." Despite the rush from Celestia, Luna kept their pace languid, exploring and appreciating. She poured herself into Celestia's hidden recesses, in the way only a soulmate can, not as another half but as more than a whole.

Luna broke the kiss to say, "It has been far too long, sister." She grinned and lay back, drawing her hooves to her chest in a coquettish pose. "What wouldst thou have of me?"

Celestia, even breathing hard and with her lips kiss-plump, managed a raised eyebrow fairly well. "I would have you stop talking like you're in a bad Shake Spear production."

Luna's eyes sparkled with mirth. "Fie!" she said. "And a pox on thee for the slander! We shall see how well thou call me 'you' with my muzzle betwist thy legs!" She began to wriggle lower, but Celestia stopped her with a hoof on her chest. Luna paused when she saw Celestia's thoughtful, hesitant expression. "No?"

Celestia opened her mouth, but had to search an extra moment for the right words. "...I know you will tell me there is nothing to be sorry for," she said, "but I would... like to... atone." She picked her words as though they were cacti. "It isn't.... I know you don't hate me for banishing... her, I know my guilt is -- is unfounded and selfish, but...."

"Feelings are never wrong," Luna said softly. "A feeling cannot be selfish, only an action, and thy actions have been commendable."

"I know that, in my head I know that--"

"Ah." Luna traced her hoof down the fur on Celestia’s chest. "The heart requires a more convincing argument."

Celestia huffed ruefully. "I suppose. I want to make reparations."

Luna cocked her head. "Do we need a safeword?"

Celestia shook her head. "I don't need punishment. This is more about doing something good for you that doesn't directly benefit me. Well -- you know what I mean."

"I do, I think. Very well." Luna shifted around to get more comfortable and let her hind legs splay. "I believe the modern phrase is, 'Make it up to me.'"

Celestia smiled, but she didn't immediately slide down to her target. Instead, she kissed Luna again, slow and deep, enjoying her mouth as she would a fine wine. She bit and kissed and suckled her way over Luna's jaw, down the sweet valley of her throat, pausing to linger at the dip between her collarbones.

Luna writhed. "Thou remember," she gasped.

Celestia paused just long enough to smirk. "How could I forget? You're beautiful."

"I am--" She lost the sentence to a sigh as Celestia continued her achingly slow journey down Luna's sternum, over her navel, where she swirled her tongue as though she'd reached her destination.

Luna's hips bucked. "Stop teasing!"

"So impatient," Celestia murmured. "I've waited a thousand years for this. I'm going to do it right."

"I would rather thou do it soon -- ah!"

Celestia licked a broad, flat path over Luna's cunt. It hadn't been just a line -- she remembered exactly how Luna liked to be eaten out, or more accurately she remembered how to get her off the hardest, which was not the same thing, but was much more satisfying. She delved deep with her tongue, forming a seal with her lips and sucking the swollen flesh of Luna's pussy into her mouth. She didn't quite bite down, but she didn't cover her teeth, either, knowing the rough treatment would get Luna going, fast.

"Lift thy rump," Luna said, with some difficulty.

Celestia didn't let up. "Hmm?"

"We have a sss-- a small audiENCE--! Present thyself."

Celestia turned to look, though she tried to be subtle about it, so as not to scare whoever it was. Three of the palace staff were hiding just outside the open door to Celestia's chambers. "Oh. Are they the ponies you talked to?"

"Aye." Luna caught her breath. "'Twas wise of them to follow me. I suppose from their perspective, I was acting strangely."

"You're still acting strangely," Celestia deadpanned. Luna blew out a breath at her for the remark, making her mane eddy around them both. Celestia just grinned and gathered her hind legs under her, raised her ass in the air, and flagged her tail hard to one side. She heard a sharp intake of breath from the doorway. "Can you imagine if we did this in the middle of Day Court?"

"Thou art scandalous," Luna said. "I approve."

"I thought you might," Celestia said, and returned to her duties. She nibbled and nipped and nosed into Luna, taking a reprieve only to suck intensely on her clit. Then, just as Luna's hips started to rise, she backed off.

Luna was confused for only a moment before she realized what Celestia was doing. "Oh no," she groaned.

Celestia didn't bother dignifying that with a reply. She softened her lips against Luna's cunt, quit sucking entirely, made every pass of her tongue leisurely and nearly serene; and Luna, just as she'd intended, made a noise of pure frustration. She pulled back to lick along Luna's inner thighs, just enough to keep the fire of her lust stoked, not at all enough to make it blaze. Luna whined. When the muscles in her abdomen began to relax, Celestia dove back in with all the vigor of before.

Back and forth she went, alternating between insatiable hunger and implacable calm, each time driving Luna higher and higher but never letting her reach her peak. Each time, it took a little longer for Luna to come down from the edge, and each time, her nerves frayed just a little bit more.

"I cannot bear it," Luna said desperately, the next time Celestia withdrew. "Thy name is cruelty, I cannot, I cannot. Bring me off or cease thy torture."

"Okay," Celestia whispered. She rested her cheek on Luna's haunch. Her muzzle was glazed with Luna's slick, as though she had gorged herself on sweet fruit and let the juice smear into her fur. "Ready?"

Luna glared. Celestia laughed and buried her muzzle once more into Luna's cunt. This time, she took her up more gently, but didn’t pull away when Luna tensed and cried out. She kept sucking until Luna's tired hoof shoved gently at her head.

"Fuck," Luna said. "Oh, that was worth it. Oh, fuck."

Celestia hauled herself up next to Luna. Luna put a hoof to her sticky chin and tipped her head into a lazy kiss. "Well done," she slurred. "Thou art forgiven thy trepasses against me. I shall not let thee deny thyself the same ecstacy, though... thou may need to choose another avenue for it."

"Did I tire you out?" Celestia rumbled. She'd been ignoring her own need, but now that Luna had brought it up, the ache in her groin was back in full force. "Move your hoof up -- no, like -- yes."
Luna's hind hoof nestled between Celestia's legs, providing the perfect surface to grind against. Celestia did so, shuddering. "Mmn. Yesss, that's good. How do you want to present this tomorrow?"

"And still, the mare speaks of policy," Luna said, affecting amazement. She added a slight push with her hoof, just enough to magnify the shift of Celestia's weight. "Dost thou conduct all affairs of state in this manner?"

"I should," Celestia huffed. "Seriously, though, are we -- are we -- what's--"

"Let us bequeath ourselves with phalli and tell the petitioners they may cut in line if they service us."

Celestia burst out laughing. "We can't! Oh, sun and stars I'd love to see -- see the looks on their fff-- face-- nn, oh--"

Luna loved watching Celestia orgasm. She came as slowly and strongly as a sunrise, and she was just as magnificent to watch. Pleasure visibly rolled through her body, from her core all the way to the tips of her hooves, until she had been completely wrung out and lay boneless atop Luna. Luna nudged her to the side, knowing Celestia wouldn’t take offense and not keen on staying pinned until Celestia woke up.

"Mm. I like tha...." Celestia yawned. "Tha' 'dea. Mm. Luna, will you wake m'up f'the sun, gotta do the... thing...."

"Of course, sister," Luna whispered. "I love thee."

"Too," Celestia said faintly, and fell back asleep.

Luna, who wouldn't be tired for another several hours, stroked her sister's mane as she stared at the ceiling in thought. There could be something interesting in her joking idea. She'd bring it up in the morning.

Celestia snuggled closer. Luna looked down at her, so grateful that after all she had done, she was still allowed to see this. "Thank you," she breathed.

Slightly louder, she added, "Could one of you please shut the door?" There was a brief pause, and then a lilac corona surrounded the doorknob and gently tugged it into the frame. Luna smiled. They were going to have an awful lot of work to do, but it would be worth it. She knew it'd be worth it.

Author's Note

Is this any good? Doubtful! Is it going to win anything? Almost definitely not! Does it have problems that I could have fixed if I was willing to spend more time on it? Absolutely! Am I going to take that time? Probably not! Is lesbian clop both something I am not interested in and completely out of my wheelhouse? Yes!

But, y'know, money.

If you want to adopt this story or premise and do it better, by all means feel free and link it in the comments. It is highly likely that you will, in fact, do it better.