"... And for the last time, this isn't the number to get pizza. May you please stop calling me? Sigh! We are now going to go to Limestone. You're on the air."

Her gruff voice spoke up. "Hey, doc. I've got a big problem with somebody in my life right now."

Doc's stressed voice lightened up a bit at the prospect of a serious issue. "Oh, with who?"

"My mom."

"I see. I want to applaud you for your bravery today. It's not easy to talk about something this personal on the air. Ms. Limestone, if you are okay with it, please tell us your problem."

"My mom buys generic pop tarts."

Doc sighed as he gently lowered his head onto the desk. "Well... Maybe she's just trying to save some money in this rough economic time."

"Well, maybe she needs to love me more! Have you ever tried generic pop tarts? It's like they stuck fig pudding between two pieces of stale bread. They don't even have frosting packets! What kind of weirdo doesn't want the frosting?!?"

Doc sighed a bit. "Ms. Limestone, I know that you are the same age as Pinkie Pie. Do you have a source of income?"

"Yes! Do you think I'm a loafer or something?!?"

"No... but I need to tell you something that will fix your problem and help your relationship with your mother... Buy your own pop tarts. Take a bit of financial responsibility into your own hooves. I'm moving right into the next call with Mary Sue again. What is it, Sue?"

"Hey, Doc. I got out of the hospital and I'm back on my hooves and flying around my room again. I was told that I had to thank you for calling the hospital for me and having that long and boring talk about real ways to deal with my pain."

"Well, I'm glad that you have learned and that ponies at home know that there is progress... Did you say that you were flying around the room again?"

"Yeah! You've got your hobbies mainly consisting of uptown funk marathons..."

"I thought we agreed that we don't talk about that."

"That deal went out of the door when it went on the air, but four hours of straight dancing to one song? Only I could do better than that because I'm Mary..." Crash! "No!!!" Thud!

Doc gave a soft groan as he heard Mary gasping for air again. "You hit the ceiling fan again, didn't you?"

"Yes, and it hurts so bad!"

"Okay. Three, two, one."

Crash! "No!" Thud! "GASP!"

"Now Mary..."

"GASP!"

"When you do the same thing again..."

"GASP!"

"And expect something different..."

"GASP!"

"And I'll talk to you at the hospital. Now we have a Mr. Cahn."

A strong and totally not fake French accent spoke on the phone. "Ello Doctor. I'm here do ask iv your fridge is running."

"Discord, this is the twenty-seventh time... today. Why do you keep calling me?"

The accent was quickly dropped. "Because I get bored. Ever since you started this little talk show I've had so much fun listening to your antics. This isn't a dull emotional show, it's comedy hour."

If one would listen closely they'd hear Doc's sanity snapping. "Oh, you all love calling just for laughs and giggles. Forget the fact that this thing is meant to help ponies, but no! You all just want to laugh at the puppy."

"Uh... Are you okay?"

"Oh! Now you all want to know how I feel. Nobody asks the only doctor in town how he feels, but he's never allowed to feel anything but calm. I'm not invincible! I just want to be helpful!"

As Doc started crying in his arms Discord's nervous voice spoke up. "Uh... I think that's all for today. Please don't be worried. I'm sure that the good doctor will be back... after a little vacation. I think we all learned today about how much you can push somepony before it stops being funny. Now that we know that, we don't need to..."

"Uh, Discord? What's going on?"

Discord jumped at the sound of Fluttershy's voice. "Uh, I'm on the phone. We'll have tea later."

Doc's crying could be heard from all over. "I'm a failure! Nopony ever takes me seriously!"

Fluttershy's voice became stern. "Discord. What did you do?"

"Uh... I might have pranked called him about one... or twenty too many times... on the air... and I might have broken him."

"Sigh! Discord. You know what I've been saying about Dr. Wolf. Now You've hurt his feelings."

"I'm sorry! I'll do anything, just please don't tell Celly. Wait, is he still on the air?"

Author's Note

Well... I think Doc needs a little break. Looks like somepony is going to sub in. I'm doing a Cameo where Celestia comes in for a session and I want you to tell me what she deals with. The best three suggestions get featured. The deadline is June 1st.

(Don't worry about changing suggestions. This is still a comedy.)