Author's Note
This was... unexpected. Song fics are song fics, however. They come when they want and they don't leave until they're finished. At least in my case.
This was very random for me, yet very moving. I enjoyed writing it. It's very bittersweet to me.
Enjoy.
It Won't Run
“Hey Rarity, you got any waterproof mascara?”
The question, perhaps innocuous to some, was one of complete shock to Rarity, because of who was posing it.
Applejack, in all of her rustic southern glory, had asked her about mascara. Certainly, they had spa trips together, sometimes facials, but Applejack had never been a make up wearing kind of pony. It took Rarity a moment, after processing the bombshell of a question, to recover herself.
“Certainly, Applejack. I have a tube I haven’t yet opened that you may have. Should you choose to use it after this tube has run out, they sell it in the pharmacy.”
Rarity went over to her vanity and opened up a drawer with a box inside of it with a latch on top. Upon opening the latch, the box revealed itself to have three shelves inside, the top one being for eye make up, the second for skin care, and the bottom for lipsticks and blush. A blue tube of mascara was still preserved in it’s packaging, and Rarity took the liberty of opening it for her, knowing how difficult that could be at times. She turned to Applejack.
“Here you are, darling.”
Applejack smiled and put it in her saddlebag. “Thank ya kindly, Rarity.”
“It’s no problem at all, Applejack. If you don’t mind my asking, though, why do you need it?”
There was an almost imperceptible freeze in Applejack after the question was posed. But it was so brief that surely it must have been imagined. She didn’t blush, nor did she cower. A true mare of courage, she just spoke calmly.
“If it’s all the same with you, Rarity, I’d like to keep that to myself for now.”
Rarity nodded understandingly. “Of course, of course. I’m just happy you came to me, darling. If you ever want to talk about the reason, or make up in general, I’m here.” She promised.
Applejack smiled. “Thanks.” She and Rarity shared a brief embrace, before she began to walk toward the door of the Carousel Boutique.
“Say hello to your family for me!” Rarity called.
“Will do! Give my best to the little ones!” Applejack replied.
“I will! See you soon, Applejack!"
“Bye, Rarity!”
With that, Applejack went out the door.
A beautiful sunny day shone down on Ponyville, and the streets were full of life. Parents and their foals played happily in the warmth, earning giggles and hearty chuckles from parents. Applejack smiled at the sight, which normally would have been earnest, but today that smile was tainted with sadness.
The walk to Sweet Apple Acres from the Carousel Boutique was one that Applejack usually enjoyed. The long route gave her time to think about what she needed to get done, and plan for it, along with checking off her daily chores. She could process many things during that walk normally, but today her mind was stuck on one thing: The make up item she now carried in her saddlebag. Or, more specifically, the reason it had come to be there.
Applejack approached her farm, her shoulders releasing tension she hadn’t realized she had been carrying as she took in the familiar earthy and sweet scents that surrounded it. It was still home after all these years. Since Granny Smith had passed away, Big Mac and herself had been running the farm on their own, and Apple Bloom had moved away to continue her education alongside her fellow Cutie Mark Crusaders. She still came and visited regularly, but it wasn’t the same.
Today Applejack had asked Big Mac to run the farm while she took care of some errands. He hadn’t minded at all, and when she approached him now with the new rake, seed packages, and mulch, he had smiled at her. She smiled back, and went inside the homestead.
Sugar Belle was in the kitchen, taking a fresh pie out of the oven. Since Granny Smith’s passing, Sugar Belle had moved into the house and become a sort of matriarch for them all, and not too long after, the couple had married. Sugar Belle wiped her hooves on a nearby towel, dusting it with a thin coat of flour.
“Hi, Applejack!”
“Howdy there, Sugar Belle. That’s a mighty great smelling pie.”
Sugar Belle smiled. “Thank you! It’s Apple Rhubarb.”
Applejack smiled back at her. “I’m sure Big Mac will love that.” Her glance went to the nearby staircase. “He still asleep?”
Sugar Belle nodded. “I got him down for a nap about an hour ago.”
“I sure do appreciate you foalsittin’ my little appleseed.”
“It’s my pleasure, Applejack! Honey Crisp is such a sweetheart.”
Applejack couldn’t help but chuckle. “Yeah, I guess he is.”
“Go be with him for a while. I can help Big Mac out if push comes to shove.”
“You sure?”
“Go on.” Sugar Belle smiled.
“Thanks, Sugarcube.”
Sugar Belle nodded, and Applejack made her way quietly up the stairs.
Honey Crisp’s room was Granny Smith’s old one. She carefully opened the door and peeked inside to see him sleeping soundly. Smiling a little, she went inside completely, and closed the door behind her as softly as she could manage, before she tiptoed over to his bedside.
Her son lay in his bed, the picture of innocence as he slept. His honey colored hair accentuated his tan coat, and when his eyes were open, they were green as a golden delicious apple. Looking at him, so cherubic and sweet, one might have never guessed that he had been the reason for Applejack’s visit to Rarity. They would have never guessed that her acquiring the make up was for a reason beyond beauty, and was one so sad that she needed something to draw attention to her eyes so no pony would see the tears running beneath them.
Her little appleseed had been playing with a friend yesterday. At five years old, he was more curious than a cat. He asked her question after question constantly, seemingly without end. Most of his questions were fairly typical for his age. Things like, “Where does rain come from?”, “Can I have pie for lunch?”, or “Why do trees grow outside and not inside?”. But yesterday’s question had thrown her for a loop because it had been so unexpected.
When the playdate had finished, Honey Crisp had come up to her wearing his thinking face. She waited, as had become her custom when he adapted that expression, but the question he posed her was one she hadn’t been expecting.
“Mama, how come I don’t have a Daddy?”
Applejack’s breath had caught in her throat, and she hadn’t known what to say. She had been wrestling with how to answer that question for years, and she had honestly thought she would have at least one or two more to figure it out.
About a year after Granny Smith had passed, Filthy Rich had approached the Apple family with some pony who wanted to do business with both of them. Applejack was the one who made most of the financial decisions in the family, since Big Mac kept the farm running, and so she had gone with Mr. Rich to meet their prospective partner.
Honey Glaze was an incredibly handsome stallion, solidly built, with amber eyes, a brown coat, and a golden mane. Years of farm work and beekeeping had made him an expert in his field, and he was sharp as a tack. Applejack and Mr. Rich had both agreed to partner with his farm, and they had become business partners.
When he came to Sweet Apple Acres one day to ask Applejack out to dinner three months after that, the farm mare began to have doubts that he only wanted to be business partners.
Their romance was not a whirlwind as one might have expected. They courted one another for over a year. Everypony had said how good they were together, and Applejack couldn’t have agreed more. She thought that he might have been her special somepony. Their lives, though not completely connected yet, were entwined enough to make her think she knew every important thing about him.
Except there was one thing she couldn’t have known.
One day when she was working the farm, she was suddenly struck nauseous without warning. She couldn’t make it to the house, so she had gotten sick in the fields on a pile of mulch. The seed of suspicion didn’t plant itself inside of her until two days later, when being outside still made her sick. She had gone to Ponyville Hospital, and they had confirmed her suspicions.
She was pregnant.
The excitement she had felt was unimaginable, and she had rushed home to tell her family before going to see Honey Glaze. She told him the news, and spun off a dream of how their family would be perfect before she caught the look in his eye.
It was a look of total disbelief. This was not an uncommon reaction, but something in those eyes made her pause. Something else was there.
“Applejack,” He had said to her, “I’m sorry, but this just isn’t a good time for me. The business is taking off, I’m being called to conferences in different cities, and I don’t have time for a baby.”
“What are you sayin’?” She’d asked him.
“I don’t- I can’t be a part of the baby’s life right now.”
She had felt her eyes well up with tears, but had stayed strong enough not to release them. “Fine, then I guess you aren’t a part of mine either.”
She had run off after that, the knowledge that he didn’t want the baby destroying her. He knew just how much she’d been desperate to know her own parents, and to know that he was forcing their- no, her- child to go through that pain was too much to bear. He hadn’t come after her. He’d never apologized, never wrote her a letter, never spoken a word to her again. She had brought her foal into the world with no father to sign his birth certificate, but she had promised to be both a mother and father to him, to be whatever he needed.
For her son to ask her that question had been heartbreaking.
Fortunately, it seemed that luck was on her side, as Sugar Belle had called out that a fresh pie was ready. Honey Crisp had scampered inside at the mention, and Applejack had been left alone, mercifully, in a place where she could cry.
She had known in that moment that this would happen again. Her boy was curious as a cat, and he wouldn’t go without answers. She would have to answer this question someday. Mercifully though, it was not today. She had cried herself out in the time her son had been inside, and pulled herself together when he came back out to play. She had had a pit in her stomach as she half expected him to ask her that again, but he hadn’t. It wasn’t until he went to bed that night that she could finally breathe.
Thus came the mascara that rested in her saddlebag. She hoped, perhaps in vain, that accentuating her eyes just a little more would draw attention away from the tears that might fill them. She kissed Honey Crisp on the head, and went to the bathroom.
She set down her saddlebags, and Got out the mascara. Sugar Belle had make up removing wipes in the drawer nearby, so she hadn’t worried about that portion. She had only worn mascara a few times, so it took a total of five make up wipes being used to get it right. She looked in the mirror, and said a silent prayer.
Thank Celestia they made waterproof mascara.
She finally decided she looked like herself again, just with a bit more eye makeup, and she put the mascara away. As she exited the bathroom, she could only pray that it wouldn’t run like Honey Glaze did.
