Well, that was it, Caramel had done one of the hardest things he's ever had to do and the pitying applause he got for it was not helping lift his spirits. He'd just given a speech at his best friend's wedding, at least most of it anyway, and now he smiled and trotted away looking a fool. Seeing the look of dopey happiness on Big Mac's face as he looked into Sugar Belle's eyes was one of the sweetest things he'd ever seen, and one of the most painful. It was officially too late, the door was finally closed, the locks were turned, the drawbridge drawn, the... Yeah it was just over and once Caramel made it into the crowd he fell onto his table, ears flat over his eyes, and only occasionally murmured as ponies patted him on the back for his emotional presentation. Yep, it was official and every pony in town had witnessed it and now he'd lost his chance; Big Mac would never look at Caramel like he does his schmoopey poo, and he'll likely never know that it was all that Caramel ever wanted.
Once Night Glider took to the platform for the mare of honour's speech all eyes were turned forward, and so Caramel made his way backward; there was somewhere he felt he needed to be.
"Give me your biggest cider... No, two of them" Caramel approached the open bar with his sourest face on.
"Hey, woah, it's alright buddy, it wasn't so bad... I mean, it's usually not the best colt crying during his speech, but I thought it was still great" the barpony replied in his most supportive voice.
"Hmmm... You know what?" the bartender smiled at a job well done, "just pass me the keg and a mug."
"Oh, err, I don't think..." He looked over his patron and grimaced, "how about I get two mugs and we take it from there?"
Once he returned he only passed one to Caramel and he looked up dejected; it was only now he actually saw the bartender before him. He was a taller pegasus, a coat of brown and a mane of, well, darker brown, and for some reason he was wearing very colourful accessories. More importantly though, looking away from his sheepish, awkward grin, Caramel noticed he was indeed holding a second mug, but not to pass it to him, but to cheers with Caramel. It was only very half hearted but he obliged.
"To the happy couple," Caramel shrunk, "and their happy future?"
"Mmm, yay," was all Caramel could manage before downing his entire mug.
"Ooof, sorry mate, relationship troubles? Weddings can have that effect on ponies," the barpony asked, hesitant he would push too far.
"Look, buddy, my troubles are... On that stage, and I just should have declined to attend, but that would have just made things worse so here I am... At least it's an open bar," Caramel's head again drooped and his ears found their way back over his eyes.
"Actually, it's Bumper, we've met 11 times... You had the buck's night at my bar literally 3 nights ago. Anyway, I'm sorry things didn't work between the two of you," he paused, unsure if he push his luck, "does she know?"
A pause.
"No. He doesn't," if Caramel wasn't more interested in his annoyingly empty mug he would have seen the childish grin the bartender had to hide. He looked back up and rattled his mug at the disconcertingly stoic looking stallion before him... With stars in his eyes.
As Bumper returned with fresh mugs the barn was enraptured with applause as a blue pegasus zoomed overhead. Setting one down in front of Caramel, Bumper lifted one in a toast, "to the other fish in the sea eh?" Half-heartedly Caramel clinked his mug and downed the drink in one go.
"It was nice meeting you Bumper, maybe we'll meet again soon," Caramel drawled as he started to mope away.
Without addressing the fact they've "met" 3 times in the last month alone he replied, "for sure mate, you'll know where to find me." Caramel only looked back and cocked his head confused, "at the bar... The bar you were at 3 nights ago."
"Right, right. Sorry, heads not in it just now," came Caramel's despondent response.
"Fair enough buddy, take care of yourself tonight," was the last thing the barpony got in before the tan stallion disappeared into the crowd lost amongst at least half of the population of Ponyville.
It was the early hours of the morning before Bumper was able to finally pack everything away, including, as promised, the leftovers of the Apple Family Reserve cider and schnapps. Honestly Bumper wasn't normally one to offer such private service but it was the reserves that sealed the deal. As he closed up the wagon and hitched up to the front his heart hitched as well as he saw Caramel sprawled across the floor a few feet away. Chuckling at the sight of the poor lightweight he went over and nudged him in the side.
"Wanna lift back into town?" he offered to the squirming mass of matted fur below him to which the only response was a groan and the slightest of nods. Lifting the earth pony onto the front of his wagon he strained against the reigns to get it moving and slowly they made their way out of the farm.
The moon was about halfway to the horizon by now and Bumper took a sip of one of the leftover bottles as he stared at the beautiful, starry sky before him as he trotted. Ever the night owl there was something special to him about the peacefulness of night and the soft light of the moon and the pinpricks that sparkled beside it. So enraptured was he that he hadn't noticed the stirring mass behind him until he heard the hurling of his companion's stomach to the side of the road; that's a wake up call he knew all to well.
Between chuckles he managed to ask the poor guy how he was doing. "Pretty sure I've been bucked in the head and felt better than this," was the response.
"Should be a canteen of water somewhere beside you there," he advised the pony swinging his weight back into the centre of the wagon... And then there was the spitting sound, "oh, right, be careful, I have a few bottles of clear spirits that look like water there too."
"Should've guessed," soon followed by the sounds of hearty gulps and a spirited 'ahhh.'
"And some food too if ya need."
"I don't think I can put anything else in there right now," he grimaced half-heartedly but couldn't ignore the sizable slice of cake right behind him. "You seem to be doing alright though, I swear you were drinking more than you were serving."
"Aww, you were looking out for me were you? What a cutie," he teased playfully, to which he was bashfully told to shut up, "I like to call it a trick of the trade, others would just call it alcoholism. But obviously I can't be an alcoholic if I never acknowledge it's a problem right?"
Caramel smiled at the wink that followed that comment until he processed exactly how concerning that statement may be.
Eventually they made it into town, the rest of the trip passing in comfortable silence as they each kept getting sucked into the beauty of the night sky.
"I can walk home from here thanks," Caramel advised as they made it into the main square that made up the marketplace.
"You sure? I just have to drop off the wagon and I can get ya home safe if ya want."
"No, no, you've done enough. Thanks for the lift there... Buddy," if Bumper was crestfallen he hid it well, "great work tonight, it was a great ceremony, all things considering."
Solemnly the barpony nodded, "yeah, in spite of things they are cute together and it was a hell of a party. Well you take care there Caramel, and be sure to drink plenty of water eh?"
"Yeees mum," Caramel snuck in slyly as he shambled off the wagon and off into the night unaware that his chauffeur was watching him the whole way. With a chuckle and an eye-roll the barpony made the rest of the journey to the bar and headed upstairs to his loft apartment.
With a groan Caramel raised his hoof to cover his eyes from the sun practically yelling at him through his window and the very act took so much energy it made him woozy. He went to roll off his bed before catching himself moments prior to stepping into the unsavoury bucket set up next to the bed. Carefully sidestepping it he made his way to the bathroom and tried to get ready for the day ahead. He knew that half the town would be taking a lazy day given the events of the night before but he still had to make himself available as the best stallion.
It wasn't long after that he was standing there, glaring at his cupboards, his recent health kick did not provide the food his gut was craving right now and his mind was made up, hash browns and hay fries. He was out the door and trotting off to his favourite cafe, not that he ate out much, and smiling to the passing ponies yet he avoided walking directly towards the sunlight. He knew he had to get to Sweet Apple Acres later but he was glad the plan was to wait for midday before the clean-up began as his stomach grumbling got worse.
With a sheepish grin to the hostess she saw the colouration of his eyes and lead him to the back of the cafe, away from the patio, and told her colleague to get a long black going. The beige barista gave a mock salute as he fired up the machine which brought a smile to Caramel's face, trust servers to understand his situation. As he took his seat he couldn't help but notice the brown wings and green jacket of the pegasus the next table over looking over some paperwork.
"Mornin' partner," Caramel's voice caught in his throat, suddenly aware how rough his throat was and that was the first thing he'd said all day.
Turning, the pegasus chuckled, "hehe, yeah that's about how I'd expected you'd sound. Mornin' to you too, pardner," he mocked kind-heartedly, "nothing like the greasy stuff the morning after eh?"
Caramel rubbed the back of his neck, "of course you'd know. You too then?"
It was the barpony's turn to look bashfull now, "hehe, yeah, reckon I should have just called it a night when I got home." Caramel was suddenly reminded of their chat the night before but decided not to address it.
"Mind if I?" he gestured to the seat besides the pegasus.
"It'd be an honour," was the response with a beaming smile.
As Caramel took his seat another server placed a plate of hash browns and hay fries before the pegasus, "your usual morning after meal there boss. And this must be Caramel eh?" the pegasus' eyes suddenly shot open as he started shaking his head, but it was too late, "great to finally meet you, guess you had a good night then?" she winked and turned back to her boss only now noticing he had his head in his hooves, making himself as small as can be. "Weeeell, I better get back to work," and with that she was gone.
A few moments passed before Caramel finally worked up the courage to ask, "so what was that then?'
The pegasus' head snapped up and he tried, and failed, to put on a cool face, "oh, hehe, well, see I own this place. I own the whole building, café on the North side, bar and club on the South," he put on a big grin that was fooling nopony.
"Riight, well good for you. And what was that then?" Caramel repeated.
"Hehe, that was just Sky being Sky, you know?" he looked desperate for that to be the end of it.
"Not really, but it does beg the question," he leaned forward, "what was that then?"
The pegasus' head dropped in defeat... It felt a while before he mumbled something to which Caramel interjected, telling him to speak up. A few more moments and then there was a sigh.
"You, er, you've been to my places a few times lately, and, er, always seem a bit wrapped up in what you're doing, and, umm... Well... OK it was from before that too really, it's just that you've just, hehe," his eyes darted around the room looking for an escape but it was too late to back out now, "look, Caramel, you're a cute stallion, and I've been a little... Infatuated for a while now, and even if he never did I've seen the way you've always looked at Big Mac and I kinda thought if I were around last night when it was beyond clear he was off the market that you might, you know, start looking elsewhere."
There it was, all out on the line and he slowly raised his head to see how his crush took the confession but was immediately interrupted as a long back was delivered to Caramel who sat there in shock.
After a pause the barista harrumphed and stomped away biting out a, "you're welcome."
"Right," was all that Caramel could get out, he only met the stallion last night and he's poured his heart out so suddenly... Oh wait, suddenly, like a movie playing in his head, he recalled the brown pegasus serving them at the buck's night, and he collected a big order of sugar cubes and caramels from Caramel 'for work' as he put it. Wait! He was the stallion to beat him at the poker tournament but left them to Caramel on the table, how had he never remembered him.
"I'm sorry Bumper, I, have, to, go help clean up the barn," he stammered out and made his way out not noticing the serving shouting at him that 'that wasn't a keep cup ya know.'
Bumper was only broken from his musing by a blue hoof on his shoulder, "soo... Not wasn't that good then?" Silence. "You gonna eat all those then."
The plate was slid over to her as Sky assumed Caramel's now vacated seat.
Hoping that hard work would distract his thoughts proved futile as his mind was both racing and sluggish at once, it was only after the third time did Caramel notice Applejack calling his name.
"Huh?"
"Ah you're back there space pony?" the mare chuckled, "I was asking if'n you're alright there. I knew you'd be bummed out and all but this is just, weird."
"Yeah, I'm just- WAIT, why would I be bummed?" he suddenly stared at her frantically.
More chuckling, "look Caramel, my brother may be an oblivious idiot, but I ain't."
Caramel groaned and put a hoof to his face, "Celestia, does everyone know?'
There's that chuckling that was starting to grind Caramel the wrong way, "I wouldn't say EVERYpony, no. The newlyweds don't seem to, neither do the younguns... Maybe not the old fashioned types... And there's them'n's who'd never pick you two from a bushel; but I'd say about everypony else, yeah."
Another longer, louder groan as she just chuckled further.
"But it's not the moping that I was expecting, something else is going on huh?"
Caramel had to shake the thoughts from his head and looked back up to her and steeled himself, "hey, Applejack, you know much about the barpony from last night?"
Her eyes lit up and a smile spread across her cheeks, "that was fast-"
"NO! No no no no, not like that," her smile faded but she didn't seem fully convinced, "it's just that he gave me a ride last night and - what are you thinking?!"
Applejack's smile was back and she gave him a knowing wink, "nooooothing."
"A RIDE HOME! On his wagon -I RODE THE WAGON THAT HE PULLED HOME! Look, do you know anything about him or not." he bit out, starting to get flustered, it seemed to placate her as she lifted a hoof to her chin.
"Hmm... Seems like a good enough stallion, got a bit of a reputation 'round the mares, few of the stallions too, but dunno how much is really true. Seems to be doing well enough for himself, got his vices, but nice enough feller. Better off asking Big Maaa- Pinkie Pie, that party pony knows him muuuch better than I would."
Caramel seemed satisfied with that, or at least didn't want to risk pushing it any further and thanked Applejack making some excuses about getting back to work which she seemed to appreciate. He went about idly picking up rubbish or packing away decoration thoughts occasionally shifting from Big Mac to Bumper, unsure of what to do next time he saw either. Big Mac was gonna be tough, they'd be friends since they were colts and Caramel's had a crush almost as long as that. He'd tried dating around in his day but his mind would always go back to Big Mac and before long he'd have lost interest; his break up with Sassaflash was particularly tragic and he'd not dated since.
"Heya Uncle Cara," his ears perked as he heard the patter of Applebloom running in for a hug. He feigned a stumble as she latched onto his leg and then tussled her mane which she giggled at, "I'm glad you're doing so well, what with Big Mac getting married last night and all."
"Seriously?! What the bu-"
"Hey Sky Flitter, you seen Bumper? Need him to sign for something."
"Hmm... Not recently, but I'm pretty sure he went to do stocktake... About 2 hours ago," the pegasus emphasised her point by making air-quotes with her wings. Taking the hint but still needing the order signed the young glassie steeled himself and headed for the stockroom.... It was worse than he anticipated.
"Heeeeeeey Breezo, ol' buddy ol' pal. I got this idea right-"
"Sounds great, write it down and we'll discuss it at the staff meeting later," Brisk Breeze knew this game well by now and knew not to let his boss, the now drunken puddle of feathers making a bed out of cider barrels, get going on a rant. "For now though, we need more of the Yakistani stuff which means you need to draw on this here piece of paper."
Bumper pouted and harumphed, he didn't appreciate the tone Breeze used on him, but he couldn't argue given the circumstances, his staff were well 'trained' to put up with his eccentricities. He clambered off the curved surface in a very unflattering fashion and stumbled over to the young earth pony and signed away. Breeze figured he'd get out before Bumper's idea came back to him and caught a "I loove you bro," as he shut the door behind him.
"So is it as bad as I think?" Sky asked as he trotted past her over the freshly mopped floor.
"About a level 6."
"Oh great, figured he'd be about an 8."
"Wait, why would he be an 8?" as Sky's eyes suddenly averted his he sighed, "Skyyyy, why would he be an 8?"
"Weeell... You'll never guess who I saw him having breakfast with this morning."
"You're right, I won't."
"OK, well he's tan, brown mane-"
"What did you say?"
"Weeeeeeell..."
It was late afternoon as Caramel was making his way back into town, following the path he had for so long associated with walking alongside Big Mac. He was unsure of what this walk meant to him now, end of the day he was still Big Mac's friend. Not that he had much time after he got together with Sugar Belle, and all that time he's been spending with Spike and Discord. Maybe from now on he'd only be coming down here for apples...
Apples... Food, he suddenly realised he never actually ate this morning and got so carried away with the clean-up he'd only picked at leftover hors d'oeuvres. Without thinking he headed to his favourite café, not that he went out much, and... Wait, why did this seem familiar, probably because he was a pony of routine.
As he crossed the threshold he saw the servers bickering and simply took a seat nearby, he only caught bits and pieces as he awaited service.
"... And you just stood back and eavesdropped leaving him floundering like-"
"Ahem," Caramel lifted his head to see the mare gesturing at him with her head and the stallion caught on and turned as his scowl turned to a composed smile as he trotted over to Caramel. He quickly shot a death glare back at his colleague and turned back to Caramel.
"Hey there Cara-" he stopped dead, "aaaaaaamel, Caramel, you know, because we know each others names naturally, and nothing else starts with Cara. What's up bud? What can I get you?"
Passing off the reaction as being related to the disagreement the server was just in, that and Caramel didn't want to risk revealing he didn't remember the server's name, he simply smiled and asked for hash browns and hay fries.
"Great order bud, it's a favourite of-... Lots of ponies, lots of ponies love that combination, I'll get that going for ya," and with that the stallion marched off towards the kitchen and Caramel settled in, dismissing the awkwardness as whatever he interrupted.
He was snapped back to reality as the server cleared his throat beside him, "and to drink? Sorry, should have... I swear I'm actually very good at my job. Normally."
Trying to break the tension Caramel just smirked and said, "mares huh?"
Seeing his 'out' the server rubbed the back of his neck, "hehe, yep, that's it, fillies be crazy right?"
Caramel's mind immediately flicked to Sassaflash and figured he squash that thought as soon as possible, "cider! Hard. Please"
Nodding, and not risking his out, the server made a dash to the bar.
"Told ya he's forgetful," Caramel's ears perked at the bartender's comments and he looked up to see her standing there with the server's hoof in her mouth, Caramel guessed they knew he had forgotten their names. He simply returned to studying the menu, appreciating their use of local artist's work to populate the back and borders, and admittedly enjoyed the cheesy puns intermixed.
It was a few minutes later when his food arrived and as it did so he asked for another cider as it seemed he'd already downed the first one. He looked down to the plate and recognised the serving as- OH, gears visibly turned in his head as Caramel stared at the plate. Suddenly he realised why things felt familiar, remembered why the staff knew his name, and as if on cue the brown stallion tumbled through the door to the kitchen with a waffle sticking out of his mouth. A still frozen waffle.
Making a move before the pegasus sprawled on the floor could notice, Caramel made for the door ignoring all else around him, including a mare in a chef's hat yelling at him that the plates aren't to take home.
The cogs in his head were working overtime now as he munched away at his cold hay fries on the couch. Caramel wasn't entirely sure why he was avoiding the barpony rather than just talking to him, but it was his gut reaction, he did it without thinking. He didn't know the stallion from a bushel, hey that's a weird analogy, and yet he seemed to feel pretty strongly for Caramel. Whilst Caramel wasn't overly unused to being wanted, being a single stallion in a town of mostly mares may seem to have it's perks, but this was the first that it seemed more than just 'mares being mares,' and he didn't know how to take it.
It felt his heart was still freshly ground up, not that he hadn't had time to get used to SugarMac, but marriage seemed so final. But on the other hoof here was a stallion who had been pining over him, a stallion he didn't even know. He seemed nice enough, maybe a little off, but Caramel started to really sympathise for the poor stallion, he knew the feeling's all too well. It was now that Caramel realised the mush in his mouth was well and truly chewed and he suddenly felt less hungry as he prodded the cold food before him.
Resolving to give this pony a chance and get to know him Caramel felt a little warmth as he got ready for bed and started enjoying the feeling of being wanted by another pony again. He went to bed feeling almost giddy as he stroked the empty half of his bed and closed his eyes.
It was late evening and Bumper was back behind the bar, he'd sobered up somewhat and Sky got him presentable in time for the first wave of revellers. Breeze never could understand how his boss always managed to pull it off, but he just shrugged it off as the pony's 'trick of the trade' and just kept at his job. He ducked and weaved through the throng of ponies bopping and gyrating, collecting the various discarded containers populating every surface of the bar. He gently swayed in time with the music of the live performer and got back to the bar with tower of glasses taller than Celestia. Bumper removed the stack from his arm and started dancing with him, the crowd around started cheering as the staff became the entertainment. It was hard to be mad at the silly drunk at times like this.
"Alright, night boss, night Sky" Breeze waved to the two as they finished polishing the last glasses and headed out into the crisp, night air.
"Night bud," Bumper called out watching him leave and he turned back to Sky, "sooo, things work out with that-"
"No, they didn't, turns out he was a buckin' loser. And no, I can't do tonight, got plans."
Her boss, and close friend, pouted playfully, "aww, we never have our fun," he followed this up with puppy dog eyes.
"Nuh-uh lover-boy, she's got plans tonight," the two turned to see the DJ sauntering over chuckling.
"Well that's my queue, 'night 'boss'," Sky pulled a terrible impression of her co-worker.
"Oh please, not you too. Have fun ladies, don't worry about me, I'll just go to bed alone tonight-"
"Don't even try it," Sky interjected before he could get going, "night pal."
Giving him a quick peck on the cheek as she passed the two mares headed for the door as Sky draped a wing over her evening's entertainment.
Bumper stood there in the hall, once thriving with ponies now completely devoid of life besides himself, he sighed and finished the last few glasses. He put out the last glass and filled it with a white russian, he sipped on it as he did a final once over of the venue. Satisfied he headed upstairs to the mezzanine and through the 'staff only' door, heading to the back of the office he opened the next door and stepped into his home. Looking around his meagre accommodations he was reminded of how long it'd been since he moved to Ponyville to get this new place up and running, and how long since he had a proper place, with ponies coming around just to hang out with him. Setting down his empty glass he had a quick shower and climbed into bed, lightly stroking the empty side of his mattress he pulled in his pillow and cuddled into it as he started to drift off.
Author's Note
Thanks for reading this mindless self-insert fluff. This was spawned from an off comment from a friend that I figured would be a one-shot... 4600 words later and the story has begun, guess I can't help myself. I'll try keep this short so it doesn't get lost in purgatory like my others.
Comments are welcome but I just hope you enjoy my work and it brings a smile to your face.
