Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom...

by Jay David

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Grogar, Tirek, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Queen Chrysalis, Cozy Glow
Length: 1945

Grogar has his fellow evildoers spend some quality time together

An alliance between the greatest enemies of Equestria has never once been attempted on the scale that Grogar, Father of Monsters, now sought to create. As such, there were naturally going to be some teething problems in getting such a thing off the ground. Because of this, the ancient foe of ponies has decided to have his new cohorts spend some time together.

Inspired by the synopsis of "Frenemies"

Published 2019-05-18 04:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2019-05-18 04:10:02 UTC

Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom...

It was safe to say that the lair of Grogar was far from the most pleasant place a person could find themselves in. In fact, it was downright miserable to look at, more the kind of locale you'd have nightmares about more than anything. Still, that definitely made it ideal for those now gathered within it. Tirek, the magic-devouring centaur. Chrysalis, deposed Queen of the Changelings. Cozy Glow, disgraced student of Princess Twilight. All these figures had been enemies of Equestria, and now they worked together in common interest against that people, under the command of Grogar of course. Whether it was out of fear of that ancient goat or a simple desire not to waste time fighting each other, the foes of ponykind stood at attention when their new leader once more arrived in the main chamber of the lair. They watched and waited quietly as he got behind his crystal ball, looking to each of his new allies before finally breaking the silence.

"So...our alliance. Such a thing is unprecedented in the world. Evil, by its very nature, seeks to strengthen itself at the expense of all, even those who it works with."

He narrowed his eyes.

"Treachery, deceit, ruthlessness. All these qualities and more are indeed useful for those such as us, yet it also serves as a danger. The risk of infighting would destroy us in our shared goal of ruling Equestria."

He tapped his crystal ball.

"Sombra's decision not to work with us has already proven that, and I hope you all agree that unity is better than solitude in this regard."

Though working with others had been something they'd all chaffed with in the past, the spectacular defeat of the king of Shadows had indeed proved Grogar's point, leading to some hesitant nods on the part of the three listeners. Snorting briefly, Grogar continued.

"Very well then. Since it's unlikely that our union can simply be commanded into being, perhaps it would be best for us to work at being partners with one another."

Chrysalis arched an eyebrow.

"What kind of work, exactly?"

Grogar grimaced, looking away from her as he answered.

"I believe we should...ugh...have a conversation."

He looked as if the very word itself was sickening to him, and it appeared as though Tirek and Chrysalis shared in the sentiment, given that they shivered in unison upon hearing it. Cozy, by contrast, looked to them oddly.

"What? We can handle just talking to each other...right?"

Tirek chuckled, but it was a dry laugh.

"Clearly, you're new to this, child. We are not beings who talk to people...we demand."

Chrysalis nodded in agreement.

"Quite. Conversation implies seeing others as equals, as colleagues...as friends even."

She spoke that word as if it was as disgusting to her as "conversation" was, and as before, Cozy was rather amused by it all.

"Well, lucky for all of you, you've got a graduate of the School of Friendship with you. I think I can teach you a thing or two about talking to each other."

All eyes were upon her now.

"Didn't you get kicked out after trying to overthrow Princess Twilight?" Tirek pointed out.

But Cozy waved him off.

"Pfft! Plotting to undermine her leadership and assume her role isn't that different from learning about her friendship stuff."

Chrysalis blinked.

"...I'm fairly certain it is different."

Then, the fallen Queen narrowed her eyes at the filly.

"And while we're on the subject, I think it's high time we addressed the elephant in the room!"

Cozy's head snapped around, glancing about the chamber.

"Wait there's an elephant here too?! I mean, I know Grogar's brought together a pretty diverse group, but still..."

Chrysalis slapped her own forehead out of frustration.

"That. Is. Not. What. I. Meant!"

Sighing, she looked again to Cozy.

"I'm talking about the fact that we have one of them as part of this little get-together!"

Here, Cozy finally understood, and frowned right back.

"Excuse me?!"

The Changeling sneered.

"We're preparing to bring Equestria to its knees, and yet we somehow have one of those Equestrians as a part of it!"

Grogar chuckled, drawing all eyes towards him.

"Indeed we do. The efforts of the forces of darkness have always been to attack from the outside, through brute strength or sinister powers. Instead, we need a different approach. We need to understand our enemy, and who better to help us in that than one of their own number?"

Cozy smiled smugly to Chrysalis.

"There! You see? I may not have been the best friendship student, but I still learned a heck of a lot. Enough to give you guys a better understanding of what's been kicking your tushies all these years anyway."

Tirek grumbled, folding his arms as he regarded his former cellmate.

"As much as it pains me to admit this...Cozy has a point."

Hearing some acknowledgement and minor praise from her sort-of mentor, Cozy squeed happily, zipping over to him and giving him a hug on his neck, much to his chagrin.

"Ugh! No hugs! I'm not a guy who does hugs!"

Grogar, who was just as disdained at the sight as Tirek, rolled his eyes before addressing them again.

"Now that that's settled, we need to discuss the other issue with this alliance."

The others looked to him.

"And that would be...?" Chrysalis enquired.

Grogar slammed a hoof down next to his crystal ball, jolting them all as he bellowed out.

"We villains always betray one another!"

Slowly, the baddies all looked to one another nervously.

"Oh, yeah, that," Tirek admitted.

Grogar looked to the centaur.

"Tirek! When you sought a partnership with Discord, you had all of Equestria in the palm of your hand. Yet you doomed yourself by betraying him at the last moment!"

Tirek spoke in a somewhat pleading tone here.

"Hey! You can't blame me for that! His magic was so...so...tempting!"

Grogar's frown deepened.

"And in taking it, you sowed the seeds of your own downfall, giving him all the reason he needed to side with the ponies once more, which gave them the final piece of the puzzle to unlocking the power of the Tree of Harmony."

Tirek chuckled.

"Well, at least we don't have to worry about that thing anymore, right?"

The way Grogar was still glaring at him was all the urging he needed to backtrack on that one.

"Um...okay, maybe it's best if I don't betray anyone this time."

Grogar snorted.

"See that you do not."

Gradually, he looked to them all again.

"Let's not beat around the bush here, my allies. We do not like one another. In fact, I daresay we despise each other, even though we all share common cause in our hate of ponykind."

There wasn't even a moment of hesitation before the crowd nodded in agreement.

"Well, guess we're gonna have to work on that then," Cozy declared.

All of the other dark forces looked to her with incredulity, prompting a giggle on her part.

"The first thing we need to do to build more trust with each other is to talk personal stuff."

Chrysalis groaned.

"Oh, this isn't going to be pleasant."

Cozy took that as reason to choose her as the first figure she spoke to.

"Chryssie? How about we start with you?"

The Queen pointed aggressively at her.

"First of all, call me 'Chryssie' one more time and I'll bite your head off!"

But Cozy nudged her hoof away.

"Now, now, you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."

The Changeling glared furiously at her.

"And you catch even more with a rotting filly corpse!"

A quick "ahem" from Grogar caused the Queen to calm herself down, if only a little.

"Alright then, you want 'personal' stuff? I and my kind were born from a carnivorous tree that fed on insects and bones!"

Cozy's face lit up.

"Ooooooh! Exotic! Get up to much before that whole Canterlot Wedding fiasco?"

Chrysalis chuckled grimly.

"Oh yes. I was a menace to ponykind even before my big reveal that day, bringing entire kingdoms to their knees!"

Then, she grimaced.

"Though I could've done without a certain King flirting with me all the time back then! I was so satisfied to drain him of his love, I can tell you!"

Cozy nodded with clear interest.

"Hmmmm, good, good..."

Then she looked to Tirek.

"How about you, big guy?"

Tirek sighed.

"I was the son of Vorak, King of the centaurs. My Father forbade me from having anything to do with magic or ponies, but I defied his wishes."

He frowned.

"He always preferred Scorpan over me! Never scolded him like that!"

Cozy nodded again.

"Ah, Daddy issues. Got it."

Incensed at that remark, Tirek's head snapped towards her.

"Oh yeah? How about you?! What's a little filly doing plotting to usurp her own people?!"

To that, Cozy smirked, then tried her "innocent filly" act.

"Oh, I'm just a sweet little filly who didn't mean to do all those terrible things! I just got led astray by societal expectations."

The others blinked to her.

"...What?" Chrysalis asked.

Cozy shrugged.

"Or maybe I was abandoned as a child by a disapproving Father, thus giving me a hatred of the idea of friendship and a burning desire to see it corrupted."

She smirked again.

"Or maybe I'm secretly the love-child of a pony and an evil demon, which gave me my very un-pony-like personality."

A giggle followed.

"Who knows? And honestly, who cares? I just found it fun to try and be Empress of Friendship!"

Grogar seemed taken aback by that.

"You found it...fun?"

Cozy nodded.

"Yep. The plotting, the sinister grins while nopony was looking, the laughing..."

She chuckled.

"Oh wow, did I just love the laughing!"

In response, Chrysalis slowly smirked right back to her.

"You know, Cozy...maybe you're not entirely disgusting to me after all."

Cozy looked over to her, matching her smirk.

"Glad we have something in common then, your Majesty. Muahahahahahahaha!"

Her unexpected laugh prompted looks among the other villains, who then joined in.

"Muahahahahahahaha!" Chrysalis chortled.

"Muahahahahahahahaha!" Tirek followed.

But Grogar sighed, rubbing his temples.

"No, no, no! You're doing it all wrong!"

His followers looked to him as he continued.

"If you want to do a proper evil laugh, you've got to really give it your all, like..."

He leaned forward, his eyes now ablaze with literal fire, as he gave out a laugh that caused the very chamber to quake.

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

A silence followed this unexpected display, and after the other three looked to one another, they looked back to Grogar before simultaneously clapping to his efforts, prompting a bow on his part.

"Thank you, thank you all. I've been practicing for some years now."

Then, he clapped his hooves together.

"Alright, now that that's taken care of, let's get back to the business of plotting to tear apart the world and usher in an age of fear and terror."

The villains all smiled to that, Chrysalis especially.

"And this is why he's the boss!"

Author's Note

When I heard that this week's episode was going to be centred around the villains, I just knew I had to write a fic for it. But, rather than my usual trend of writing one after seeing the episode, I decided to do something differently this time and write one based on what I think an interaction between those characters would be like.

I have no idea of what I've made is even remotely similar to what the episode itself will do, but hey, it'd be pretty neat if it did :raritywink: