Humans and Violence

by Jest

Rating: mature
Tags: Adventure, Violence, Princess Celestia, Human, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Death, Alternate Universe, Original Character
Length: 18038

Random ideas that Jest has thrown out over the last few months, now on fimfiction for the first time.

I am releasing a plethora of scrapped ideas and stories that have been tossed aside over the last few months, in the hopes of getting some feedback and rewarding all 1000 of you fine people for following me!

The stories all follow a theme of being adult oriented with heavy themes, blood, violence etc while either being human in Equestria, or crossover oriented with the same dark themes. So if that's not your shtick then you may want to skip on these ones. If it is your thing then I hope you enjoy and let me know what you think!

Here is a link to the blog post where I talk about each story, and explain what its about as well as my thoughts behind why each one wasn't quite good enough to make the ultimate cut.

Published 2019-05-14 00:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-05-14 00:50:01 UTC

Calamity Jane

The distinct copper taste of blood was heavy on my tongue, and I turned my head and spat a wad of the stuff onto the floor of the arena. A wave of obscene yeling came from my right, which was about where the friends of the bastard who had just slugged me were sitting. I could just barely hear Cait off to the side, shouting words of encouragement, or insults, I honestly wasn't sure which.

I wiped a hand across my lips, smearing my palm with my blood.

“Your not a bad fighter. What was yer name again?” I asked, glancing up at my opponent.

The kid couldn't have been more then twenty or so, and was as thin as a board. I didn't rightly know how he managed to muster so much power behind those punches of his, as his beaten leather duster had long since lost its sleeves, revealing the skinniest arms I’ve ever seen on a cage fighter. The boy smirked, rolling his fingers and readjusting the grip on the knuckle dusters he had on.

“Johnny is my name, though after I beat you to death in front of your druggy girlfriend I think I’m gonna add Cage to it.” He licked his cracked and broken lips and chuckled darkly. “Or do you think that's too indulgent?”

I could already feel a growl beginning to grow in the back of my throat, the mention of Cait making my blood boil in a way not many things could now a days. Pushing down that urge I turned to Cait, making sure to keep one eye on my scrawny opponent. “You mind if I pop this kid?” I asked.

Cait blinked, a massive smile coming to her face. “Tommy doesn't like you doing that, but honestly, this dumb little prick has it coming.”

“The hell are you talking about?” Johnny yelled, squaring his shoulders and raising his fists.

“Nothing.” I yelled back, a smirk crossing my face. “Just getting permission from the missus.”

The scrawny little fucker laughed in that creepy manner that only rapists could manage and before he even opened his mouth I knew what he was gonna say. “After this I’m going to-”

Normally I let folk finish their threats, as I live giving em a little satisfaction before I beat them, but I already knew what he was going to say, and I was already pissed. A soft orange glow began to emanate from my fist, and I could feel Tommy’s glare intensifying on the back of my head. Thankfully he knew better then to try and stop me, not like he could mind you, and something about the way he stayed silent until now told me the kid had pissed him off in some way. Not like I needed his tacit approval or anything, but it was kinda nice to know that I wasn't going to get an earful after I ended the poor fucker.

Time slowed as my fist began to sweep into a powerful uppercut, and I wondered if he had a bounty on his head, or wether he was just a shit disturber. In the end, it didn't really matter as that was a problem for later, right now I was just focusing on keeping my mouth closed so I didn't end up swallowing a bunch of my victim’s blood again. I may not be the same apple farmer I was three years ago, but accidentally drinking someone else’s blood is fucked up no matter who you are.

Seeing my fist coming up at him, the kid tried to dodge out of the way, but I had simply put too much magic into the strike, and we both knew that his movements were going to be too slow to help him now. I watched, with a twisted sense of fascination as my fist slipped between his, the look of confusion on his face slowly morphing into one of pure, unadulterated terror. In that instant it was like I could read his mind, and i could tell that he was realizing all the whispered rumours about my terrible reputation were suddenly proved true.

The last thing he did was look up at me with wide, pleading eyes, his mouth opening to say something. I didn't care to hear it though, not like that was an option of course, as a split second later my fist connected with his chin.

If you'd seen me way back in the day from my time bucking apple trees on Sweet Apple Acres, you'd know just how much damage my kicks could do if I wanted to. Back then I never imagined I’d go using that strength on another living creature, but hey, the wasteland has a way of weeding out the naive, and turning the strong, cruel.

Bone crunched beneath my fist, the knuckle duster I had on my hand crumbling under the sheer power of the blow. Blood spurted, bone snapped, skin tore, and a fraction of a second later, the scrawny fucker’s head was flying through the air, while his body remained in place.

A hush fell over the crowd, and I just stood there, with a wide, confident smirk on my face as I watched the kid’s head go flying across the arena and come to a stop with his neck on the ground, his eyes on me. The head looked right at me, then to its body, then back to me, its lips moving like it was trying to say something. But, without access to his lungs, which were currently about six feet away from its head, words were a little outside of his ability to make.

While this happened, his body twitched and spasmed, his arms remaining locked in the same defensive position they had been in before I removed his head from his shoulders. Then, just when I thought I might have to fight his headless body as well, the damn thing collapsed like a puppet with its strings cut.

Utilizing this moment of silence, I pushed my hat back up on my head, and pointed at the headless corpse. “I was gonna let you live, but you just had to go and flap your gums. You best take these last moments to pray to whatever god will listen, cus boy, you ain't destined for this world.”

My words seemed to break the silence that had hung over the room and a deafening cry erupted from the stands of the combat zone. I turned to the crowd, the psycho pumping through my veins beginning to die down at about the same time the adrenaline did. The packed crowd made for a deafening moment of victory, but it wasn't like I needed my ears to know what was going on.

The fighters clustered around the bar had their glasses raised, a few sharing the same knowing smirk I had on. The rest of the crowd was mixed, the regulars in the crowd seemingly nonplussed by my display of power, while a few of the Diamond City folk I noticed earlier seemed ready to throw up. A few others near the back seemed bizarrely interested in what happened, and I could tell there were a few psychos out in the crowd that were damn near getting off from my little display.

I didn't care one iota about a single one of those fuckers though, as my eyes were on Cait, and to an unfortunate extent, Tommy Lonegan, though I ignored the irritated look that the ghoul was giving me. Cait on the other hand, was beaming from ear to ear, her eyes containing that hint of fire which promised me a long, and passionate night. In one hand she held a large bottle of whiskey, and in the other, a hypo of psycho, her intentions crystal clear.

I raised my arms to the sky and yelled in triumph, my brain only now realizing that the crowd wasn't just yelling, it was chanting. In my defence, psycho tended to fuck with my ears for whatever reason.

“Calamity, Calamity, Calamity.” They chanted over and over.

Sweet Celestia did I love hearing my name yelled like that. It was enough to making me forget about the pain in my lip and gut for the most part. It was a far cry from my old name, but Applejack didn't really fit me or the wasteland, Calamity Jane on the other hand, well that fit about as well as my stetson did.

I suppose I should back up my story a might bit eh? Your probably wondering how I went from Applejack the farmer, and bearer of the element of honesty, to Calamity Jane, terror of the combat zone and remover of heads.

This might take a while, and might need a little explanation, so why don't we just roll the scene back a little first eh?

“I haven't seen hide nor hair of your element, where did ya last leave it anyway?” I asked Twilight, tapping my hoof impatiently.

The alicorn across from me frowned, and looked around the orchard, as if her element could have just been lying around my property for some reason. Despite my urge to sass the poor mare, I could tell she was nearly despondent at the loss of the artifact, and poking her at this point would just be mean. Still, I made a note of reminding her of the elements importance and maybe hint that she should keep better track of her things after this whole thing blew over. Right now, she needed my help.

“That's just it. I remember putting it on my end table where I always leave it. I have some protective charms located on that spot so no one can just walk away with it.” Twilight explained. “Yet when I woke up this morning it was just gone.”

“So you think you might have left it somewhere else?” I inquired.

The alicorn just sighed. “I don't know, could you help me check the library? Maybe it's somewhere obvious that I just haven't found.”

“Well shoot, of course I’ll help, give me a few minutes to make sure Big Mac knows where I am and I’ll be right over.” I replied with a smile.

I could see my friend’s shoulders sag, the tension she held slowly bleeding away. “Thank you Applejack.”

“Aww don't sweat it.”

“I invited the rest of the girls down just in case. I was gonna work on a locator spell in the basement as a back up, just in case.” Twilight continued.

I nodded slowly. “That sounds reasonable.”

“Wonderful. I’ll see you at the library then.”

I placed the couch cushion back in its place and took a step back, scratching my head with a hoof. “Well that's the last place I could think of.” I muttered.

Rainbow Dash floated down from the ceiling, her hooves crossed over her chest. “Well it's not in the rafters.” She remarked.

A second later and Fluttershy trotted next to me. “And it's not in the kitchen.” She added.

“Or the bathroom.” Rarity remarked, using her magic to scrub her hooves with a towel. “Though Twilight really should scrub that shower of hers, it's disgusting.”

“And it's not in her room!” Pinkie Pie added, hopping down the last six or so stairs and landing next to us.

“Well shoot. Where in the hay could it be?” I asked.

Spike hopped up onto the couch and sprawled out, clearly exhausted from the hours of searching. “I have no idea.” He muttered, his words obscured by the fact that his face was pressed into the cushions.

“Its gotta be another bad guy right?” Rainbow Dash half asked, half stated.

“That would be par for the course at this point.” Rarity remarked, her magic dulling as her hooves regained their familiar shine before discarding the towel on a nearby chair..

“I don't know about that. Twilight can be a little…” I scratched the back of my neck, unable to think of a nice word for it.

“Scatterbrained?” Spike finished.

“I was gonna say distracted, but that works.” I conceded.

“She has been very busy since the whole coronation coming up.” Rarity added.

“True, but don't you girls think it's strange that she's not helping us look for it?” Fluttershy interjected, a frown on her face. “I mean, not that I mind, but she would usually be right here with us if she thought it could be in the library.”

“Gotta be some jerk bag villian.” Rainbow Dash concluded with a nod. “I wonder what kind of ancient evil we are gonna whoop this time? I bet it's gonna be some sort of shape shifting bugs from beyond Equestria.”

Pinkie Pie rolled her eyes. “Now that's just silly.”

“Yes, absolutely silly.” Rarity added with a hint of hesitancy in her voice, her mind no doubt conjuring images of the terrifying bug monsters Rainbow Dash had mentioned.

“Well I think the villain is Twilight’s schedule.” Spike muttered, propping his chin on his hands. “I mean have you seen how long that thing is? I bet it stretch half way across Ponyville for pete’s sake!”

“That does seem a might bit concernin.” I remarked, turning to the basement door. “Maybe we should go talk to her about that.”

“I agree wholeheartedly darling.” Rarity added.

“That does sound like a good idea.” Fluttershy whispered.

“Wait, does that mean we have to keep wearing our elements?” Rainbow Dash inquired, lifting the necklace she wore.

I looked down at my own element for a moment before shrugging. “We might as well hold onto em for now, who knows what Twilight has planned for em.”

“Besides, something tells me Twilight is gonna have a conniption if she sees us without them.” Rainbow Dash remarked with a snicker.

“Good one Rainbow!” Pinkie Pie snickered.

Fluttershy and Rarity didn't laugh quite as loudly, but I could hear that they both seemed to enjoy the joke at our friend’s expense. I myself held back and only laughed a little, hiding my mirth by making my way towards the door. “Well come on y'all we better go talk to her before her head starts spinning.”

The sound of their hooves behind me told me all I needed to know and I made my way over to the door only to stop when it was suddenly thrown open, a wild eyed Twilight standing in the entryway. “I found it!” She yelled, raising a triumphant hoof into the air.

“That's good news, where was it?” I asked.

The alicorn shrunk slightly. “Oh I know where it is, but I don't have it quite yet.”

“What the hay does that mean anyway?” Rainbow Dash asked, pushing her way to the front.

“It might be in an entirely different reality.” Twilight sighed, and turned around, motioning for us to follow her. “Here, I’ll show you.”

I frowned, sharing a look with the rest of the group who collectively wore masks of concern, save for Pinkie Pie, who didn't seem to be bothered one bit by the fact that the element of magic was in another reality apparently. With a shrug, I lead the way, trotting down the stairs as the rest of my friends followed suit on wing and hoof.

All save for Spike who just waved at us from his spot on the couch. “I’ll be down in a bit!”

As we walked down the stairs I realized that the basement was as disastrous as it always seemed to be, books, boxes and other things were sprawled everywhere, though this time there seemed to be a theme to the normally random objects. Spell books were opened all over the place, some having papers and scrolls stuffed into them, or laying next to them, indicating that Twilight had been hard at work taking notes on something. Spell components of all shapes and sizes were grouped into three seemingly random piles, glowing crystals next to claws and horns of creatures I didn't know the name of.

At the centre of it all was a large magical circle of some kind. Now I obviously ain't a unicorn, or really that knowledgeable in magic, but even I could tell that it was something mighty important. For one it was glowing, and if there is one thing I’ve learned from Twilight is that if it's magic, and its glowing, it's important. Secondly it was huge, and had plenty of weird symbols and whatnot, ninety nine percent of which I couldn't make heads or tails of.

“So, do we just go through the mirror and get it or what?” I asked, as I looked around the room.

Beside me the rest of my friends had similar looks, with Rarity appearing the most interested by Twilight’s spellwork, and Rainbow Dash appearing to be the least interested, the pegasus looking down at her hoof with a bored expression.

“How do you know about the mirror?” Twilight asked, her eyes narrowing.

I shrugged. “You talked about it a little while ago remember? You were going on and on about interdimensional something or other.”

The alicorn frowned, but at least dropped the accusatory look she had on. “I was getting rather ranty wasn't I?”

“It was a record!” Pinkie Pie piped up, bouncing over to the circle. “You went for thirty nine minutes before you realized no one was paying attention!”

Rainbow Dash snickered. “Thanks for that by the way, you made me ten bits richer after that little rant of yours.”

Twilight blushed profusely, only to shake her head and ignore that last bit of information entirely. “Well we can't use the mirror, because it's not in that other Equestria.”

“Then where is it?” Rarity inquired.

“It's in a third, so far undiscovered reality.” Twilight explained, pointing over to a blackboard I hadn't noticed until now. “Our world and this second Equestria are linked by a primary bridge, this third world has very little magic at all, but that's not what is so concerning about this place.”

On the blackboard were three circles, one that was clearly marked with Equestria, the second marked with Equestria two, which was a pretty unscientific name if I do say so myself. While the third just had a bunch of question marks above it, with several theories written next to it.

“So then what is the concerning thing?” Fluttershy asked.

Twilight frowned, and made her way over to the blackboard, tapping on the mystery world. “Like I said, it doesn't have much magic, which is strange in itself, as magic is the only thing that can bridge the gap between realities but that isn't what is confusing. What is confusing is the fact that the crown has been there for years.”

“Didn't you lose that like this morning though?” I asked, looking around at my friends, who all nodded their agreement.

Pinkie Pie gasped suddenly, bouncing over to Twilight. “Unless you had a fake the whole time!”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “That's not how the elements work. Besides, we used them like a month ago remember?”

“Eh, it was worth a shot.” Pinkie Pie said with a shrug.

“Are you sure your calculations are correct?” Rarity offered. “I may not be able to help in that regard but maybe Celestia or someone would be able to offer assistance.”

The alicorn winced, rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly. “I haven't exactly gotten a second opinion yet, but I can't go to Celestia. She would be disappointed in me.”

“But Celestia is such a nice pony.” Fluttershy interjected, smiling weakly. “Don't you think she would understand the situation?”

“I guess.” Twilight admitted. “If I don't figure out a way to get it back by tomorrow, I’ll send a letter and let her know what happened.”

“Alright. But you really should think about getting someone else to check things for you.” Rarity added, giving Fluttershy a reassuring smile.

“I know I know. Trust me, there will not be a repeat of last time.” Twilight muttered.

“Good, because I’m pretty sure Mrs Cake is still scrubbing the cheese out of the carpet.” Pinkie Pie exclaimed with a shiver of disgust.

I opened my mouth to speak, only for something out of the corner of my eye to catch my attention. Looking over, I noticed a small hole roughly the size of my hoof which had just popped into existence at the centre of Twilight’s circle. The edges were a mass of swirling chaotic energy that seemed to be every color of the rainbow at once, the center of which was pure darkness.

“Err, what is that?” I asked, pointing my hoof to the now rapidly growing hole.

“I thought you said you weren't going to try anything.” Rarity reprimanded, taking a step back.

“I did! This isn't me!” Twilight exclaimed, backing away from the circle, her horn already alight. “Stay back, I’ll try to close it.”

I did as she said and took a step away, only to notice that Fluttershy was rooted firmly in place, a wide look of fear plastered on her face. Before I could react, the portal grew three sizes, and the faint pull I had first felt when it opened, turned into a desperate tug that made my entire body feel a little lighter.

My heart leapt into my chest and just as I was about to leap to the distracted pegasus’ defence, Pinkie Pie was there, her forehooves outstretched and grabbing the poor girl’s torso. The chubby earth pony’s weight seemed enough to keep them down, but I could already tell that things were going to get worse before they got better. The portal was growing ever larger, the pull it had seemingly only affecting me and my friends. Papers and loose items remained in place, and as I took a look around I noticed that the whipping wind looked and felt like it was reaching out and trying to grab us.

Rainbow Dash was nearly completely horizontal, the pegasus holding onto a light fixture on the wall. Rarity had managed to grab hold of the large oak table near the center of the room and other then the fact that she was screaming in terror, seemed to be the best off. Twilight somehow managed to anchor herself to the ground with a spell, and she trotted slowly across the room, her jaw clenched tight with focus.

“Hold on Pinkie Pie!” She yelled, trudging towards the sliding pair.

The pink pony could only grunt in response, her natural earth pony magic helping her to stay semi-anchored, but with Fluttershy unwilling to move she was fighting a losing battle. Then, exactly what I feared would happen, happened. The portal yawned wider, tripling in size once more, now easily nine feet wide and double that in height. My grip threatened to slip, but the use of my magic rooted me firmly in place.

I wanted to yell to see if everyone was okay, but the wind was now so loud that my voice was drowned out completely. Instead of yelling, I looked around, and found that other then Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy, everyone else seemed more or less fine. Grips were beginning to slip, and I could see true terror in Rarity’s eyes as even the old oak table began to skid across the floor.

Twilight was just about to reach Fluttershy when Pinkie Pie shrieked in terror, her grip slipping to the point that the pair were now flying through the air. In that moment I hesitated, my mind trying to come up with some action I could do to save my friends. Thankfully Twilight was there and grabbed them in her magic before yanking them down and casting the same anchor spell on their hooves which was on her own.

Unfortunately for us, her concentration waned for a split second, when she accidentally looked into Fluttershy’s eyes and causing her magic to fizzle out of control. In an instant the alicorn was airborne, flying towards the portal without anything to stop her. Rarity’s magic gripped the alicorn’s legs but shattered in an instant, the unicorn unable to counteract the force of the portal’s tug. A second later and the alicorn vanished into the swirling mass of chaotic energy, the last thing any of us saw of her was her wide, terror filled eyes.

I leaned low and poured everything I had into my magic, willing my body to become as heavy as possible. I wish I could say I was thinking of a plan, or working a way out of here, but at this point I was so damn terrified that all I could think of was the fact that I might end up having to leave Apple Bloom and Big Mac behind. I am ashamed to admit that I placed my own safety above my friends, and though it was only for a moment, it's a moment I would come to regret for the rest of my days.

At the edge of my vision I could see Pinkie Pie flying into the portal, the brave pony having put herself between the portal and Fluttershy in an attempt to hold her back. The blank pegasus had not made it easy though, and her limp form flew through the portal a second after Pinkie Pie had. A blur of rainbow light lit up the room, and in an instant Rainbow Dash had flown headlong into the portal, having proved herself braver than me.

My hooves were beginning to slip, and I glanced over at Rarity, our eyes meeting and reflecting the same terror we were experiencing. It felt inevitable, and with the rest of my strength I resolved to at least try and save the last of my friends. I leapt forward, using my momentum to place myself between the portal and Rarity as Pinkie Pie had tried to do. My head down and my hooves filled with magic I dropped like a stone, the oak table slamming against my forehead.

Gritting my teeth, I held on, trying desperately to keep the table Rarity was hiding under from falling through. Icould see the terror in my friend’s eyes as she held onto the leg and I knew she was screaming something, though I knew not what. I did know Rarity though, and I assumed she was trying to be altruistic, telling me to save myself.

No matter what she was saying, I wasn't going to just sit there and leave them without trying something.

For a moment it seemed to hold, my decades of apple bucking meaning my hooves were able to generate far more magic then the average pony and enabling me to stay rooted to the ground. But that was only for a moment, and with a dull boom I knew the portal had grown wider still.

This time there was no fighting it, and I was in freefall before I could even muster an attempt to stop myself. Flying through the air, I caught a glimpse of Rarity who was flying towards me, hooves outstretched, reaching desperately for me.

I extended a hoof, and just as I was about grab her, everything went black.

And that's how I ended up here.

I smirked, wiping the blood from my hand and eying up another raider fuck who had pulled out a switchblade. Like the others, he claimed I had cheated, and had brought a power fist into the ring, and like his last buddy, he was ready to try and exact some wasteland justice.

I mean, I didn't end up right here anyway. I mean the wasteland in general and the combat zone for about two thirds of that time.

I smirked as the knife wielding punk ran at me, magic already growing in my fist. The howl of the crowd nearly drowned out the thunder of my heart, the last dregs from the psycho I took still keeping the old ticker thumping.

Psycho was weird like that, you could get a burst of adrenaline all of a sudden and it's like the high never stopped. It was one reason I loved it so much.

The punk’s first swipe was wild and lazy and I dodged to the right easily. I thought about doing something fancy, or disarming him, but with the drugs still pumping through my veins, I chose a different path. Dismissing the magic in my hand I took a step back, raised my right leg and delivered a snap kick so devastating that the raider fuck was sent flying into the stands. Drinks were spilled, swears were yelled, but before all that, bones cracked and organs ruptured.

I knew he wasn't getting up before he even hit the ground and I spun to the last raider, hoping for a fight. The metal armored girl dropped her knife and took a step back, arms raised over her head. For a second I considered attacking her anyway, a grim part of me wondering if I could punch straight through the mish mash of metal that was bolted over her chest.

That notion was quickly dismissed though, and I laughed aloud.

“Smart thinking kid.” I announced, extending my hand. “Say, what's your name?”

The raider gulped, glancing at her fallen friend, and noticing that the other people in the stands were already stripping his corpse bare.

“Uh Crawler.” She muttered, nervously grabbing my hand.

I gave the grimy appendage a good squeeze without going so far as breaking anything, reminding the dumb raider who she was dealing with without injuring her. “Calamity Jane, nice to meet ya.” I announced.

“You want to join us Crawler?” Cait asked, stepping next to me and slipping her left hand into my back pocket, grabbing my ass.

The metal clad raider took one look at each of us, then to the drugs and booze Cait had gripped in her other hand and stopped. She seemed to think about it for a second before a wide grin exploded across her face. “Why the fuck not? I already lost almost all my caps on this stupid fight, why not go for broke eh?”

“That's the spirit!” I announced, clapping the girl on the shoulder as I raised a hand. “Jim, she's on my tab!”

“You got it boss.” Jim the bartender yelled back.

“Hell yeah, let's get this party started.” Cait hollered, raising a glass.

I smirked, my mind already imaging what must lay behind the metal plates that obscured the raider’s chest. “Lets.”

This story might take a while to explain, so bear with me, but don't worry, it's a good one.

Author's Note

No ads or nothing, just a sincere thanks from me to you!

Violence for Violence

I wasn't a very nice person, in life.

I read on the internet that violence for violence was the rule of beasts, but I’d argue that it is man that is the only true beast. Animals know not violence, they know not what they do and know not the implications of their actions. There exists only instinct and an intelligence too small to truly parse the moral quandary that surrounds what they have done.

Though even then, I had once read that great apes were incredibly violent and were known to actively raid competitors territory, killing the young and generally doing as much damage as possible. These apes knew hatred, they knew violence, and though I know not if they understood just how vile their actions truly were, I believe that on some level they knew what they were doing was wrong.

So maybe it wasn't just us humans who were the beasts of the world. Maybe it was just us great apes, maybe somewhere along the line god put the devil in us.

I had died an ignoble death, both cold and alone, with nobody to grieve over the meat sack I left behind. Though even then It hadn't been bad, dying that is.

As I lay there in the snow, a junky’s knife between my ribs, I felt peace for once. Sure there was pain but it was nice knowing that it was finally over, and the cavalcade of failures that was my existence would come to it's final, terrible end.

All the drug dealers I had protected, all the scumbags I had helped to keep breathing, they all kind of faded away for the first time in a long time.

I felt this burden of guilt, and self loathing that had built up over a decade in the business begin to lift, and a sort of clarity settle over me. It made sense, really, to have gone toe to toe with the biggest assholes in the city only to end up with a kitchen knife between the ribs. I wasn't an expert by any stretch of the imagination but I had stabbed enough people to know that this spot on the left side, usually did you in a matter of minutes.

And to think, I was finally doing something kind and giving money instead of taking it for a change.

Karma’s got quite the twisted sense of humour.

Again, I can't stress enough how nice it was. The gentle fall of snowflakes against my face, the cool touch of death, it would have almost been scenic if I wasn't lying in some shitty parking lot in the west end but hey, it was a nicer death then I deserved, that much was certain.

Still, as I lay there, my blood flowing into the snow, a crack head rooting around in my pockets for a fist full of bills, I felt one last pang of regret, before I left this world.

I had never wanted to walk this path, to become the man I was, everything just happened and instead of changing it I just went with it, accepting it as my lot in life.

“Heh, maybe next time.” I muttered, blood already freezing on my lips.

“Such a waste.” A voice muttered.

Existence returned to me like a hammer blow, and I found myself suddenly aware once more, my brief stint of non existence making this current ‘life’ feel strange and almost distant in a way.

“Where am I?” I muttered, trying to move any part of my body, knowing from experience that I needed to get blood into my limbs quickly in order to put up a fight.

Yet there was no blood to pump, or limbs to flex, nor even the familiar feeling of rope against my wrists.

Instead there was only a black void that filled my new existence.

Feeling disconnected from my body was not a new sensation for me, and I quickly stifled the panic that threatened to rise where my gut should be. “Whos there?” I demanded, my voice emanating from around where my mouth should be.

“You are nowhere, and everywhere.” The clearly feminine voice whispered.

I jerked to the right only to see more vast emptiness. “Cut the shit and come out here.” I muttered bitterly. “I may be dead but I don't have the patience for your mysterious horseshit.”

The voice sighed in manner that made it clear it was disappointed in me. “You would think patience would come to you when time no longer exists.”

I grunted. “Patience may be a virtue, but so is being concise. So, out with whatever you want to say.”

“I saw this coming, and yet I still find myself disappointed.” The voice sighed again, raising my ire ever higher. “Let's get this out of the way first. You are dead.”

“No shit.” I remarked. “Get on with it.”

“Your dead, and you are about to go to what amounts to hell, or at least you would have anyway.” The voice remarked quite matter of factly.

“This is where you offer me some sort of faustian bargain right? To get out of the hell that awaits me and in return I get a hell of my accidental choosing?” I laughed bitterly. “Well no thanks, I’ve always wanted to go to florida and hell sounds about as close as I’m going to get to the keys.”

“No actually.” The voice whispered, quite proudly I might add. “No bargain, and no choice, think of this merely as an interlude in which I may offer you some words of wisdom.”

I sighed, wishing desperately I could punch the owner of the sickly sweet voice, or at least to tap my foot impatiently. “Well, get on with it already.”

The voice tsked. “Such lip, that will have to go.” Before I had a chance to hurl another insult the voice continued. “In life you were without purpose, without a goal, or something to care about. You had nothing, and cared for nothing, not even yourself. That will change.” The voice sighed, in a way that made it almost sound like it was releasing a breath made solely of pity. “I know you are going to bring your violence to my world, and I know it's going to be important that this happens, but still. Try and keep it to a minimum, please?”

I paused, the insult dying on my tongue, struck by just how… genuine she sounded. As if this was more of a plea then an order or even a request. Contrary to what my anger what wanted me to do, I sighed and whispered back. “I’ll try.”

“That is all I ask of you.” The voice smiled, don't ask me how I knew, but I could just tell. “Good luck my son, and please do forgive your new form. It is all I can manage from this realm.”

Before I had a chance to utter the question already building on my tongue I found myself thrust once more from unreality into existence.

This time there was no delay, no bizarre sensation of spontaneously popping into existence after briefly not existing at all. I was simply in that space with the voice one second, and the next I was somewhere else.

Somewhere cold.

I would have sighed if I could, though it was rather poignant that I died in the cold, only to be born into the cold anew.

“Hey, there is something over here.” I heard a male voice shout from somewhere nearby.

I tried to move what amounted to my body but found myself encased in all sides by some form of stone. No limbs reacted to my call, no arms or legs, only a writhing mass of what felt like liquid. It was fucking disgusting to say the least.

Thankfully I had no manner in which to vomit, or else I would have done just that.

Instead I focused on ‘hearing’ in the direction of the voice. I put hearing in quotations because I knew logically that I had no ears to speak of, so hearing wasn't exactly the word I would use to describe it, maybe perceiving?

Regardless, I was rewarded with the soft clip clop of hooves, alerting me to the sudden realization that I was now in a reality to which there existed intelligent equines. Which was not what I was expecting at all, though now that I thought about it wasn't that far fetched. The voice definitely had not been human, so was intelligent equines truly that strange? I hope there are dragons here to, twelve year old me would love that.

“It's some sort of liquid trapped in the crystals.” The male voice remarked.

It was soft, and from what I could tell the owner of said voice was probably not the healthiest, his cheeks almost getting in the way of his speech. His steps were also heavier then the smaller, daintier pair that now approached.

“Interesting.” A female voice remarked in a cold and clinical sounding tone.

Her voice lacked empathy, I couldn't tell you how I knew, but the instant she spoke I could tell she was not a creature to be trifled with. Her steps were also light, confident, and she strutted up to my crystal prison without fear or trepidation. Though I could not perceive anything other than sound, I could feel her eyes upon my body, making a shiver course up where I imagined my spine was.

“Miss Dawn, ma’am?” The fat guy asked hesitantly, his hooves shifting back and forth nervously.

“Remain calm mister Nucleus.” She muttered, leaning closer to my prison, her hooves pressing firmer against the ground. “If it could escape it's container it would have done so already.”

“R-right.” The male muttered, continuing his irritating shuffling. His fear disgusted me for a reason I couldn't quite put into words.

For a long moment they remained silent, the spineless twerp shuffling awkwardly, his fat slapping against itself, making bile rise inside me. The female however remained unmoving, apparently deep in contemplation, or revulsion, I couldn't tell which as she was utterly motionless. “Intriguing.” She remarked one final time, before turning and strutting away. “Bring the guards, place it in the secure case and bring it to site B.”

“Are you sure it's what were looking for?” Fatty asked nervously.

“We can't know for sure, not yet.” The female stopped. “Regardless, it is quite interesting is it not?”

Fatting shuffled awkwardly, turning to me and pausing. “Is it… listening to us?”

“Most definitely.” The female responded. “I expect your preliminary report on my desk within the hour of you reaching base, understood?”

Fatty nodded his face, prompting his jowls to jiggle. “Right away ma’am.”

“Good, I expect great things from you mister Nucleus.” Then, she left, the sharp clack of her hooves being the last I heard of her.

Fat boy relaxed the instant she left, slowly turning to me and sighing. “This is doctor Nucleus, we have the package, bring the case and prep the helicopter, we leave in twenty.”

I would have blinked if I had eyes, surprised by the surprising amount of spine fat boy showed.

Before I had a chance to reconsider my opinion of the tub of lard, I heard several sets of hooves enter the room I was in. They were harsh, confident and weighed down by what I assumed was some sort of protective gear and weapons, they were referred to as guards after all.

Moments later I heard the clank of something metal being dropped on the ground, followed by a second clank as it was opened. I waited patiently, hoping against hope that the equines would give me the opening I needed to escape the confines of my crystal prison.

Alas, they did not, and with a swift crack I found myself jostled as the crystal around me was freed, while I remained unable to move, and without an opening. With all the ceremony of someone tossing a bag of potatoes into a trunk they tossed the crystal, and me along with it, into the case.

The last thing I perceived was the clank of the case closing over me, then darkness as the complete absence of sound or sensory feedback whatsoever settled over me.

With a mental sigh of irritation I settled into my prison, choosing to take this moment to relax, and sleep, if my new body even required such a thing.

Sure enough, the darkness came quickly, and along with it, peace.

Author's Note

Still no ads or nothing, just a third thank you!

Demon

The void was neither an unpleasant, nor a pleasant place, and as I floated there aimlessly, I considered the distinct possibility that I was dead. It would make sense after all, as despite all I’ve experienced in life, floating aimlessly through an endless black void was new to me. No drugs or near death experiences included this level of realism, which ruled out the possibility that I was drugged or poisoned.

Well, it didn't quite rule out the poison, it just meant it did it's job.

I would have sighed if I had the organs necessary to do just that, but as it stood now I was unable to do much other then to gaze out over infinity.

Speaking of time, that wasn't really something that I could keep track of, as there was no reference point, nevermind the fact that time may be faster or slower here. I didn't even want to consider the possibility that my perception of time had been altered as well, seeing as I no longer had a brain. Fun fact, the reason flies are really hard to swat is because they experience time faster than humans, this is also one reason they don't live very long.

I pushed that thought out of whatever facsimile of a mind that I had and continued to stare out at the vast expanse of completely nothing.

I wondered if it was an aneurysm that got me in my sleep, which would explain why I couldn't remember anything other then going to bed the night before. Maybe I was shot in the head so I couldn't even wake up before I expired. Either way it didn't really matter now, as something told me there wasn't exactly a way to go back from wherever here was.

As I lay there, floating through eternity, I considered my life, and what a worthless sack of meat I had been.

Sure I had a few accomplishments, I had written a mediocre book and had a small house, but other then that my life was, for lack of a better word, empty. My parents died a number of years ago, both from natural causes. Work and my own piss poor personality kept me from making true friends, or dating anyone that wasn't just a good lay.

“I really should have asked out that last yoga instructor, they were hot.” I muttered, or at least imagined I had, I’m honestly not sure which since I didn't have a mouth to speak of, pun intended.

As I lay there, time seemed to stretch on into infinity, and I wondered if this was hell. If so, they vastly overestimated the torture part, as this was boring but not agonizing. Oh sure I was going to go mad eventually, but madness wasn't really a torture, merely an altered mental state only considered torture by the sane, something I wouldn't be in a few years.

I chuckled at my bizarre line of thinking, a part of my brain wondering just how long it would take before I flipped my lid.

Then, just as I was trying to think of some mental game to help keep my sanity for a little longer, I heard a voice.

It was quiet, to the point that I couldn't even really make out any words, and I strained to try and hear what it was saying, desperate for some sort of stimuli that didn't come from my own head.

I wondered if I had snapped already, but it hadn't felt like I had been here long enough for that to happen yet.

“-sure about this my queen?” A hesitant, buzzing and oddly feminine voice asked.

I paused, and would have cocked my head if I could, the voice being so unlike anything I had ever heard before that I couldn't even imagine who or what was speaking. Though it had a distinctly alien reverberation to it, there was no mistaking the sense of worry that undercut it's tone.

“This is the only way we are going to survive out here.” An older, yet still alien voice barked back angrily before breaking down into a fit of coughing.

The second voice was different in the fact that it had a certain air of command to it, as if it was used to taking charge and telling people what to do and knowing that her instructions would be carried out. It also had the distinct air of desperation that made me imagine the speaker being terrified of both what she was doing, and whatever had drove her to such a choice. The coughing was also quite unpleasant to listen to, the creature sounding like it was about to fall apart at the seems, or cough up a chunk of itself.

“But a demon.” The first voice muttered. “Are you sure you can control it? The last demon to be summoned to Equestria nearly-”

“I know well what happened the last time someone did this. Now be silent and light the braziers, we have precious little time before the ritual window will close completely.” The second voice yelled back, making the first voice whimper before it's owner did what was commanded of it.

Odd. I thought to myself, the talk of demons and summoning made me imagine dungeons and dragons, something I hadn't truly thought much of in over a decade.

I focused closer, pushing whatever senses I had closer to where I felt the voices were coming from. Though there was no up or down that I could distinguish, I was beginning to find a sort of current, or pull that was drawing me towards the voices.

The first voice gasped suddenly. “It's coming my queen, I can feel it!” She murmured in shock.

“I can feel it too, focus and do not let up. Remember, we are binding it to the very hive mind, so it will have no vessel of it's own.” The second voice exclaimed, a hint of fear worming into her words before coughing several times and spitting something wet on the floor.

“Yes my queen, I’ve made sure to adjust the summoning circle appropriately.” The first voice replied, disgust and worry evident in her voice.

As I floated there I decided that I was gonna call the first one zippy, and the second one barky, it seemed to fit their personalities and it sure beat thinking them as alien one and alien two.

As I waited patiently for them to speak again, I was irritated to find that they had fallen silent, the two creatures working on something important enough that they had stopped speaking to one another. Quickly growing bored with the silence after being treated to some sort of stimuli, I pushed harder, testing the limits of my new sense of direction.

Sure enough, I heard zippy gasp again. “It's coming!” She yelled.

“The circle is ready, get back and remember the chant.” Barky shot back angrily, a small hint of worry worming it's way into her words.

This was just getting stranger by the minute, were they referring to me? I’m not a demon, I may have been a bit of a depressed jerk, but I was never out right cruel. Or at least, I was pretty sure I never was.

What came next was the strangest chanting I’ve ever heard in my entire life. It was one part gregorian, one part throat singing and one part creepy demon speak. I know that doesn't make a lot of sense, but honestly that's what it sounded like. As i ruminated over the strange chanting, I felt myself get pulled closer and closer to the strange chanting, my ethereal self being dragged away from the void I had existed within until now.

This irritated me, as I had not made the choice to move closer, but was instead being pulled forward like a dog on a leash. The comparison only made me more mad and I couldn't help but pull back on the feeling, testing to see if it even could be resisted. Though the chanting rose a few octaves for a second or two, it continued as strong as ever, my body or spirit unable to resist the call.

Odd, did it sound like Zippy was in pain for a second there? I brushed that thought aside and merely sat back, observing the situation. On the one hand I didn't really care where it was pulling me as it sure beat the endless black hell I had found myself in not to long ago. On the other hand, this might just be hell, and I was in some sort of purgatory until now. I couldn't help but imagine the devil checking his day planner and noticing my name on some list, only for him to realize that he had appointment he was late to.

The thought amused me, and I simply let the chant continue without resisting, determined to face whatever my final fate was, with at least a little dignity.

Second later I could feel something strange, and after wiggling my nose, I realized that I could do just that. Not only that, but I could also smell something oddly coppery, my mind conjuring images of a bloody ritual circle of some kind being laid out before me on a cold stone floor.

The thought was repulsive, but it also made me curious if I was an accident of some kind, as it wasn't like I was demon. Though, if I was destined for hell, that would make sense why it might have ended up grabbing me.

Either way I was just happy that I didn't smell brimstone or something awful like that. That being said, blood wasn't exactly a much better indicator as to whether or not this was hell.

Remaining motionless, I allowed myself to be pulled more fully into whatever reality the voices were coming from. My hearing expanded slowly, allowing me to realize that there were more voices then I had first anticipated, a great many more voices no less. An entire chorus of strange chittering voices was crying out to the heavens in order to bring me down to their realm, their manner of speech and even stranger language leaving me rather unnerved. A strange sense of pride filled my chest and I wondered if my summoning was a great feat of magic or some strange science human minds had yet to comprehend.

Putting aside those thoughts for later, I slipped further and further into their reality, my mouth filling with the taste of blood, as a flickering scene suddenly came into view.

At the centre of the room was a wide magical circle of some kind, the contents of which made my head swim just looking at it. Symbols my mind could barely comprehend filled the circle, and I quickly realized that the circle was where the copper smell came from, as the lines were painted in bright red blood. Blood that seemed to originate from a small horse… thing, that lay off to the side, it's eyes glassy and it's mouth hanging open.

On second glance, the horse clearly wasn't a horse, but rather some sort of dwarf pony of some kind, it's eyes far too large, and it's body far too small to be a true horse. Once more I pushed that thought aside, focusing instead on what else lay in the room and ignoring the horse’s cyan fur and frankly bizarre mane and tail.

On either side of the circle were two more horse things, but these were different from the first dead horse thing. For one they had no fur, and instead were clad in what looked like chitin of some kind, like some kind of ant or something. Holes perforated their bodies, and though they had the same size eyes, they also glowed faintly, and were different colors. Stranger still was the strange seaweed like hair that fell from their heads and butts. I quickly realized the later hair must be a tail of some kind, though I didn't care to look long enough to establish some kind of understanding of their unique styles.

I was more fascinated by the large fangs that poked out from either side of their mouths, indicating that they were at least omnivores of some kind. That was nice to know, as I wouldnt be able to live without a good steak every once and awhile, provided my existence could be considered living, that is.

Not like I couldn't eat vegetarian mind you, but something tells me eating meat around the other horse things was a way to be ostracized rather quickly, nevermind the cost of what must be a luxury item amongst a herbivore society.

As I thought more about meat, I noticed that the smaller holey horse was growing disturbed, as if she was reading my thoughts about bloody steaks and the market dynamics of a mostly vegetarians society. I stopped and looked around, realizing that my point of view seemed to move as I wanted it to, despite the fact that I had no body to speak of, nor eyes for that matter.

What was going on,I wondered, my mind swirling with strange emotions that I knew weren't my own.

The larger holey horse grit her teeth, her horn flaring brightly as she dragged me fully into their reality.

I admit I felt rather stupid for not having noticed the horn and wings both of them sported as well as the different eyes they had, but in my defence, my world was changing disturbingly fast, and I was still reeling from the realization that I was indeed in another reality entirely. Not like that took me too long to adapt to, as I was happy to return to any reality at all.

Taking a closer look at the room I noticed that the chamber was in some sort of cave, the floor being slanted slightly down to the left, with a large door built into the stone wall to my right. The room was illuminated by a series of braziers that flickered with a strange greenish light that made me feel odd for some reason.

The emotions I had felt before suddenly surged back to me and I was distinctly aware of a spike of panic that ran up where I imagined my spine would be. Spinning around, I realized that the panic was coming from zippy, yet somehow I was the one feeling it.

The sensation was an unpleasant one, but it couldn't hold a candle compared to the all consuming hunger I felt clawing away at my very soul. It was a deep, and voracious thing, the urge to devour everything in the room becoming nigh overwhelming. For a moment I wanted nothing more then to lash out in an attempt to devour anything and everything in the room, but knowing that I had no mouth from which to eat, I sumized that such an urge would be as futile as it was vicious. Without a mouth or any body to speak of, I was left with little choice but to try and bear it with some kind of dignity, or at least survive the pain it inflicted upon my being.

I had always prided myself on my willful nature, and had strived continually since my adolescence to sharpen that will until it was as strong as steel. With all that said, my will was still tested by this new hunger I felt, as it was so unlike anything I had ever experienced before. It was a craving bordering on madness, with my very soul feeling empty and demanding sustenance.

For a long moment I remained motionless as I fought against the hunger, pushing it down and shoving it into a box at the edge of my mind. Though difficult, I managed it, leaving me with only a dull ache at the edge of my perception. I made a note of getting something to eat at the earliest opportunity and ignored it utterly, turning my attention back to the room.

Where two rather stunned looking holey horses were looking at me.

Which made me realize I had a body to even look at for that matter. Looking down I noticed that I was like some sort of force ghost or spirit of some kind. My features were blurry though, leaving me as little more than a humanoid shape made of glowing emerald energy.

“That is odd.” I murmured, only to blink when I realized I had both said that aloud, and actually heard what I had just said.

“Fascinating.” Barky murmured, walking around the edge of the circle and taking position next to Zippy, a hoof pressed against her aching heart.

“It cured the hunger.” Zippy murmured, turning to Barky with a look of complete and utter shock.

“Neigh, not cured, but rather compartmentalized, it's still there if you look for it.” Barky replied.

Little Zippy closed her eyes and remained motionless before nodding. “Your right, it's like I stubbed my hoof or something.”

“Not to intrude, but who the hell are you? And where the hell am I?” I inquired, taking a step forward.

Barky took a step back, her taller stature enabling her to almost look at me in the eye, though her intimidating and alien aura was somewhat diminished by the damaged state I noticed she was in. Chitin was cracked and broken, and one eyelid was only half open, barely hiding a milky orb that contained a slitted pupil unlike little zippy who had strangely featureless eyes. “You have been summoned to Equiss, and I am your new master, queen Chrysalis.” She announced, striking a bold pose.

I blinked several times, aware that the holey horse was trying to be intimidating, but had only succeeded in looking kind of cute and somewhat pathetic.

“We are not holey horses, we are changelings.” Zippy corrected.

“Wait, you read my mind, how?” I asked, dumbfounded.

“Your mind is inside the great collective unconscious of the hive, none of your thoughts are secret any longer.” My apparent queen replied. “Indeed your very body is a projection of our consciousness and does not in fact exist at all.”

My eyes narrowed, and I strut across the circle, making my way closer to the larger changeling and glaring down at her, ignoring the existential dread I felt building in my gut. “I’m assuming this is the part where you are supposed offer me something, yes?” I asked pointedly.

“You will help us dominate the land of Equestria and in return I will give you whatever you desire.” Chrysalis announced, a smirk on her face. “Unless you'd rather go back to hell?”

I frowned, already not liking the idea of dominating any land, nor returning back to the void. “That wasn't exactly hell that I came from, but wherever this is, it sure beats there.” I shrugged. “Sure, why not. First thing’s first though, I am going to need information, and some kind of body, because I can already tell this is going to be a problem.”

Zippy gulped, and glanced nervously up to the larger changeling, wanting to speak, but deferring to her elder.

“I have a body ready, but even then, you will still be tied to the hive mind, and it will not be a true vessel for your dark spirit.” Chrysalis remarked, before turning and hiding a cough that threatened to break her regal aura. “Come, your lessons begin immediately.”

“You sure don't waste time, do you?” I mused, walking to the right of the queen and doing my best to ignore the fear and disgust that seemed to radiate off the both of them in equal measure.

“My children are starving, we have little time, and much to conquer.” She replied evenly, as if she were old friends with both conquest and desperation.

I nodded along, pushing this way and that within the mental realm I felt slowly emerging all around me. As I poked and prodded I noticed that not only could I feel what they felt if I focused, but I also had a sort of mental map that I could feel pop into existence the moment I tried to imagine my location. On it I noticed Chrysalis was represented as a large green flame, while Zippy in comparison was little more then the diminutive light of a tea candle.

“My name is Pupa.” Zippy exclaimed.

I shrugged. “I like Zippy better.”

I could feel Chrysalis’ anger before she even spoke, giving me ample time to anticipate what was coming next. “Her name is Pupa, and you will respect her, as you will the rest of my children.” Chrysalis demanded.

Once more I shrugged, unable to truly care about these utterly alien creatures or their egos a single iota. “Sure, whatever.”

Looking up, I noticed that the tunnel was slowly winding upwards, gaining more and more signs of civilization the higher we went. I could feel like there were small side passages splitting off at odd and odd angles but when I looked I found them difficult to locate. The offshoots emerged seemingly at random, having been further refined from what must have been natural offshoots, and uncaring to the fact that they both went up, down and at strange slanting directions before twisting off to the side. The realization that they used the tunnels meant that they must have some way to stick to walls much akin to fly or other insect was an interesting one, and I pondered just how far that assumption went.

Turning a corner I noticed a trio of changelings standing on the side of the hall, their backs straight and their gaze straightforward and respectful as they stood guard, reminding me of medieval guards in a lot of ways. Peering into the changeling’s minds I quickly realized that was correct, with the centermost one being the only non guard, his mind being slightly duller and emptier then the other two. From him I got the distinct impression that his purpose was simply to dig and tunnel and was more like a trained animal rather than a true person like the guards that stood on either side of the tunnel he seemed in the midst of excavating.

“My children are not animals.” Chrysalis snarled, turning to me suddenly.

“Look, I’m just calling it like I see it.” I shot back, stopping and crossing my arms over my chest. “The other two seem to have something going on upstairs, but that little walking block of swiss cheese doesn't even seem capable of experiencing fear like the other two.”

And the other two were indeed experiencing fear, the dou nearly quaking under my gaze, and trembling when I had briefly glimpsed into their tiny minds and strange, definitionless eyes.

“All changelings have a purpose, and there is only honor in completing that purpose.” Chrysalis exclaimed angrily, while using some sort of magic to force me to me knees, so she may look down upon me.

Rather then be annoyed, I simply raised an eyebrow. “Fine, fine. Just don't expect me to hold a conversation with the dunce.”

The queen suddenly exploded with rage, a single raggedy wing extending from her back as magic coursed through her horn, making the room light up as it was bathed in green light. “Your apathy is irritating but tolerable, however there is one thing I cannot and will not tolerate and that is disrespect of my children.”

I blinked lazily, pondering what exactly she could do to injure a glowing green ghost while also contemplating something else entirely. “So do you give birth to all of them, or?”

“The queen lays royal eggs, but the drones, guards and other classes birth more of each other when needed.” Zippy replied helpfully, only to frown when she realized I was still referring to her as Zippy in my head.

“You will kneel!” Chrysalis boomed, my body moving on it's own and forcing me to kneel once more before the angry changeling. “You want to know what I can do to make you suffer?”

“Kinda. Right now this entire thing is frankly too bizarre to really take in. One minute I’m floating through the void and the next I’m dealing with talking horses, getting turned into some ghost thing and being forced into the service of some bug horse, thing.” I explained. “This is a lot to take in all at once and I’m pretty sure I’m in some kind of mental shock.”

“We are not bug horses you idiot.” Chrysalis barked, only to stop herself, having no doubt realized I was trying to get a rise out of her. “Fine, you want to get straight to the punishment, let's get straight to it then.”

Before I could muster a response, her magic flowed over my form, and I found myself thrown bodily against the floor, my mind exploding with pain. A quick look over my form told me that I had no physical damage to speak of, but that made sense as I still lacked a true body. Despite this fact, pain the likes of which I had never experienced before suddenly filled every fibre of my being and I could only flail weakly on the floor, moaning and trembling.

“And to answer your question, this is all the pain and suffering that the hive is experiencing in this very moment.” Chrysalis explained, leaning down to eye level. “Every paper cut, every case of mana exhaustion, birth, broken leg, shattered horn and numerous other injuries now course through you.”

Clutching my head, I tried to push back against the wave of pain, but unlike the hunger, this new sensation was not able to be beaten and no matter how hard I tried, it continued to pound into my psyche. “Enough.” I muttered weakly. “Please.”

I could feel Chrysalis’ eyes on me, yet for how long she stared while she said nothing I did not know. So vicious was the pain and the length of it's stay that it got to the point that I began to wonder just how long she would make me suffer before letting up. Just as i was readying myself to do something risky, she let up, the pain vanishing in an instant. The experience was akin to whip lash and I found myself shaking for several more seconds before my brain seemed to catch up to the rest of me.

Reaching out with a hand, I pushed my knees under me and forced my head down to the ground, prostrating myself before the changeling queen. “My apologies, your highness. Please forgive me.”

The changeling queen radiated pride, a feeling that doubled when she realized how repulsive I found the emotion. “Don't forget this moment. I am not above simply locking you deep within the hive mind and using you as little more than a repository for all the pain my children feel.”

A shudder ran down my spine, and I couldn't help but grit my non existent teeth. “That will not happen.”

Chrysalis turned and raised her head. “You had best not give me reason to then.”

And with that, she began to trot away, leaving me to scramble to my feet and follow close behind her, a wary Pupa close at my heels.

For the first time in my new life I began to wonder if this truly was better then the void, at least there I could do whatever I wished.

Author's Note

Hey whats this an ad? Rude. Well sorry to disapoint but I just wanted to let ya'll know that although this is a bunch of the former exclusive stories, there are still a bunch that are avialable only for patrons. (and are currently in process)
Oh and before you go, just a reminder but these stories were veiwable for 2 months to 2 weeks ago if you were a patron, so if you want to see stories like this as soon as they are done then head over there and dont miss out!

Oh hey your still reading! Thats great, as a thank you heres a super secret sneak peak of my reverse birthday present that will hopefully be out june 1! Dont tell anyone. ;)

War Machine

I glanced out the window of my office, peering out over the quiet neighborhood as I waited for my chess opponent to finish his turn. I had picked off nearly every single one of his pieces by this point, but he had also managed to get my queen as well as both of my knights, the three pieces I used more than any other. Still, with little more than pawns and a single bishop left, their chances looked slim. As I watched the timer slowly burn down on their turn I glanced to my second screen, where I was also waiting for another opponent to finish his turn. The card game we played was quite popular nowadays, and I had whittled him down to no life points, while forcing him to discard all but one of his cards. With a solitary card in hand he would need something incredibly powerful, and most importantly, uncounterable, if he was going to have a chance to get back into this.

I turned back to the window and watched as a bird flitted from one tree to the other, gathering twigs for a nest it was building. The bird was small, and resembled a robin, but I didn't give it enough attention to truly discover what species it was as one of the timers burnt out and my chess opponent conceded. Which was fair, as he could only move his king and a single pawn without putting himself in check.

A second later my card game opponent attempted to cast a large, very counterable creature which I made sure never hit the board. With all of their threats dealt with, and dead on board, they had little to do other than concede, but it seemed like they were feeling spiteful as they waited out the timer for another two minutes before conceding before my draw step. I shrugged, not really irritated by the move, as I had little better to do today anyway.

I considered queuing back up for another match as I watched the little animation announce that I had reached grand master 135, and diamond 1 respectfully. In the end I decided to end my little gaming session right there and closed both programs before standing up. My chair creaked and groaned as my weight lifted and I placed a hand against my lower back as I stretched.

A twinge of hunger drew my attention to the kitchen, and I walked through my small apartment in search of something to satiate said hunger. As I walked I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and I stopped and looked for a moment, taking a step into the bathroom.

Age had been kind to me, though I shouldn't really say that as I was not even thirty. Still, I had always looked older than I was, so I could probably pass for thirty five, or maybe even forty if I dyed my beard white. Running my fingers through my facial hair I carefully straightened the mass of disheveled hair, while pretending to not be concerned by the fact that the white patch on the right side was getting a little wider.

I sighed and ran a hand over my smooth, bald head, while silently cursing my genes for the billionth time. Something I stopped and reprimanded myself for, as at least it gave me wide shoulders, and a large frame which combined with a light workout routine left me with an impressive physique, though that was mostly just looks. Something that made sense considering my job as a security guard, as ninety percent of it was merely looking intimidating, and the other ten percent was just meticulous note taking.

Something I both had in spades.

Dark bags hung under my eyes, something that had stayed with me since childhood, and though I joked that they were the cause of one too many all nighters, apparently it was another weird family thing given to me by my dad, like grey hair and balding young. Grumbling silently I scratched my stomach and turned back to the kitchen, intent on making myself a cup of noodles or something small that wouldn't ruin my supper.

As I reached into the cupboard I heard something strange in the distance, like a voice calling my name, but it was so far away that I figured it was merely the wind. Placing my phone on the counter, I slid past the Pinkie Pie lockscreen and threw on some youtube video I didn't really care about in the background.

With some background noise making me feel not quite so lonely, I filled the pot with water and readied the instant noodles in a bowl off to the side. Just as the water was filled I heard the voice again, this time slight closer and far, far clearer. Placing the pot on the stove, I turned it on to a low temperature and made my way over to my front door, which I opened and hung my head out of for a second.

After hearing, and seeing nothing out of the ordinary, I pulled my head back inside and moved instead over to the open window in the combination living room and dining room. Hearing nothing like the voice for the second time, I closed the window and went back to my noodles, muttering to myself about getting a roommate, or perhaps a girl or boyfriend, anyone I could double check my sanity against.

Turning up the volume on the video I turned the stove up a bit and deposited my noodles into the water, stirring the contents constantly as I began to wonder if I had left a game on in the other room or something. The noodles cooked quickly, and I deposited them into my bowl before cleaning up after myself and bringing the contents therein back to my computer, along with my phone, which I made sure was charged before tucking into my jeans.

Plopping back down in front of the screen I opened netflix and considered watching another documentary only to find that I had watched everything that had looked interesting. I sighed, and scrolled through the list of the ones that I had seen already, hoping something would jump out at me and make me want to rewatch it. Scores of war documentaries, as well as a rather lengthy series on historical and modern weapons scrolled past me, my eyes glazing over as I found little that struck my fancy. Switching to something else, I decided to indulge in some philosophy, and picked one at random, not really knowing enough on the subject to properly formulate an opinion and merely picking one based on one having a dude with a massive beard as the cover.

As the screen displayed the opening to the movie, I began to dig into my noodles, slurping back the spicy mixture with gusto. Despite the fact that my eyes watered immediately, I continued to consume the delicious substance, only to be interrupted mid slurp by the sound of my name being called, this time far closer and far clearer.

“Angus.” It spoke, in a clearly feminine yet demanding tone.

I found myself transfixed for several seconds, unable to move or even do so much as blink. After about a minute I shook my head and stood up suddenly and made a beeline for my room, where I grabbed the work knife I wasn't technically allowed to have on me while at work. It was a large, intimidating blade that looked more like a short sword than a true knife. I never actually had to use it so far though. Sure I had to flash it a few times when working in the north end, and even pull it out one time but I hardly knew how to use the thing. That being said I felt a little better with it being in my hand, the weight making me feel more comfortable and easing the fear that had been crawling up my spine.

I waited patiently, knees bent as I waited for the voice to return.

Minutes passed and I began to feel silly for my bout of paranoia, the logical side of my brain telling me how ridiculous I looked jumping at shadows. I chuckled nervously and returned to a stand, my knuckles no longer white from the tense grip I had on the knife.

I walked back over to the sheethe and had slid it halfway back in before the voice returned, this time booming in my ears and making me drop to the ground, knife and sheath in hand. “Angus!” It demanded.

I knelt on hands and knees, unable to move or even breathe, my lungs burned and just when I thought I would pass out, its grip lessened and I bolted upright, breathing heavily. Strapping the knife to my leg I threw open my closet and tossed on the old leather biker jacket I had inherited from my father before donning a simple black hat only to stop myself just as I was beginning to reach towards the small box at the back of my closet.

“I don't need a gun, I’m having an episode or attack of some kind.” I muttered to myself.

Shaking my head I considered tossing aside the knife only to shrug and decide that since time was of the essence, that I had better use that time to find my phone and contact an ambulance. My heart thundered in my chest as I sprinted to the next room, the phone glinting in the light as I reached for it.

“ANGUS!” The voice spoke again.

This time I found myself unable to resist the unspoken command that lay beneath the voice. A command that made me crumple to the floor in agony, my muscles writhing as if I had been electrocuted. Only this was unlike the times when I had been messing around with the wiring when I was a kid, or even when I was an adult and got tasered as part of my security training.

This pain was immense, and nearly all consuming, making me twitch as I struggled to not violently expel the contents of my stomach. Though my ability to sense my surroundings became incredibly limited, I was distinctly aware of a feeling of wrongness that suddenly surrounded me completely.

The closest equivalent I could imagine would be like the time I went on a roller coaster in high school, only this time it was like I was being pulled in four different directions at the same time. The sudden inertia I experienced was bizarre, but more concerning than that was the way my insides seemed to twist inside my midsection, as if my very essence was being shoved through a hole much too small for it to pass through.

With another shove from some force beyond my control, I was pushed between whatever wall had been holding me back momentarily and my entire body twisted in reverse. My eyes refused to open, and for that I was grateful, as the rush of noise had grown to screaming cacophony of sound that made my stomach turn worse than it already was.

Than, just as suddenly as it began, it stopped, and I felt solid ground under me once more, though the raw noise I had been subjected to had left my ears ringing and my head spinning I could at least feel something. I groped around on the ground as I got my bearings, the cold tiled floor alerting me to the fact that I was no longer in my office anymore. Wrenching my eyelids open, I looked down to find myself in the center of what looked like an arcane circle painted in vibrant purple on a pearl white stone floor.

Giving my head a firm shake, I placed one hand on my knife and tried to force my limbs to answer my commands and allow me to rise once more. This was a futile effort though, as I could only twitch weakly for several seconds before falling back to the floor. Gritting my teeth I slammed my first into the ground, fighting off the wave of nausea and weakness that clung to me like an enormous smothering blanket.

“Its up! Sweet Celestia what do we do, it's not supposed to be up!” Cried a panicked voice of something small and feminine.

The fact that my ears couldn't suddenly work again was a pleasant change, but the panicked cry of a nearby person alerted me to the fact that something had evidently gone terribly wrong. The tone contained the same primal fear I had heard a few times while on the job, and it told me that I was in the middle of a dire situation. Looking up, I noticed that I was surrounded on three sides by tiny, robe covered horse things.

Blinking rapidly I realized they werent horses at all, but rather ponies like from the show I used to watch. For a second my brain seemed to stop functioning as I stared at a short teal unicorn with a bowl cut of mint and white striped hair. “What?” I muttered in disbelief.

“Its armed, get the guards! Hurry!” Cried a voice from behind me, this one clearly male, and even more panicked than the light colored mare cowering before me.

Pushing aside the last of the strange weakness clinging to me, I stood up and found that I towered over the ponies to the point that my head brushed the ceiling. The ponies barely came up to my waist and all around me I could hear a flurry of activity as the two male unicorns I had seen earlier were running out a door I heard open behind me.

In front of me stood the lone mare who looked up at me with eyes so wide I thought they may roll out of her head. Despite the clear terror on its face I couldn't help but laugh, as I imagined its eyes literally rolling out of its head. An act that only made her more scared for some reason, as she backed away until her butt hit the wall.

Kneeling back down I drew my knife and placed it on the ground, trying to make it obvious that I was not in anyway trying to attack her. “I come in peace.” I spoke, lowly and slowly.

The mare blinked, her pupils slowly growing as she looked down from the knife and than back up to me. “W-what are you?” She stuttered.

“Not from around here, that much is obvious.” I remarked with a smirk, which seemed to be another thing that set her off, the mare nearly wetting herself as she continued to press herself against the wall.

Raising an eyebrow I looked down at her, my smirk falling away. “I know it looks a little crazy right now but could you please tell me where I am and what's going on?”

“Your in C-c-canterlot.” She muttered, looking past me and towards the hall where I could hear the clank of armored hooves coming closer.

I sighed, and considered my options for a moment before choosing the least threatening action I could think of. Pushing the knife towards her I laid down on my chest, my hands behind my back. “I know I may seem scary but please, do not be alarmed, I will not resist any attempt at capture, do you understand?” I spoke again, aware that the clanking was growing closer.

The mare gulped and nodded weakly, using her magic to drag the weapon close to her, apparently too weak to heft the large weapon. Outside, I could hear the commotion stop, only for the door to explode outward and two slightly larger, well armored stallions trot in, their pure white coats standing in stark contrast to the gleaming gold of their armor and the reflective silver of their spears.

“Halt!” One barked at me, only to look down and realize I was already all but restrained. “Uh, good. Stay there, demon.”

I rolled my eyes. “Really, a demon? Come on now I know I must be intimidating to you but that's just uncalled for.”

The dou paused as they entered the room with the second one’s jaw hanging open. “It shouldn't be able to speak, who cast the translation spell?”

The minty mare from earlier coughed awkwardly. “All of the summoning rooms have inbuilt translation matrices.” She explained, only to wilt suddenly when attention was directed towards her.

I frowned despite my situation, slightly irritated that these stallions were glaring at her so harshly for merely answering a question. Despite my annoyance, I remained silent, watching as the unicorns fanned out along the walls, keeping me in their sights, their horns glowing and their spears levitating beside them.

“Resistance will be met with force, any attempt to stand or attack us will be met with lethal force, do you understand?” The first, and slightly larger stallion spoke.

I nodded calmly. “Yes officer.”

He blinked, taken aback by my politeness apparently. “G-good, sargent Steam Shield, if you would.”

I turned to the second stallion who winced under my gaze, his magic flickering, and nearly resulting in the pony dropping his weapon. “L-look away, p-p-please.”

I shrugged and did as he was told, baffled by just how skittish they were, though I guess it made sense as it was obvious that I was not a vegetarian like them. I mean I was, but not biologically, but through choice alone.

I waited as the pony soldier cast his spell, a faint tickle coming over my wrists as two metal bands surrounded them and closed, or would have, had my wrists not been larger than expected. “Uh, commander?” The second stallion muttered.

“Oh for the love of… go fetch a pair reserved for minotaurs, that should be large enough.” The first one barked.

“R-right.” Steam Shield muttered before sprinting out of the room.

I looked over to the summoner pony from earlier, noting that she had yet to move, before turning to the lone stallion. “Shouldn't you secure the civilian first? She seems scared out of her mind.”

“I uh..” The stallion closed his mouth and looked over at the unicorn, only to shake his head. “Her conjuration spells may be required in subduing you.”

“I can assure you I have no intention of resisting, or making a fuss, please reconsider, she looks about ready to pee herself.” I continued.

“I would r-really appreciate it, commander.” The mare whispered.

The stallion seemed to give it some thought, only for him to ultimately shake his head. “She is a part of this army and I will use any resource necessary to detain a potential demonic invasion. Besides, her link to you may very well be useful in the future.”

I didn't have a chance to question the link he mentioned before Steam Shield returned with a much larger pair of handcuffs that resembled manacles more than the simple steel cuffs they had brought in earlier. This time they did fit, though they felt oddly weak when I flexed my wrists, as if they would bend under my will if I really pushed it. Stowing that thought away for now I remained where I was while they secured my bindings.

“Rise, demon.” The commander demanded.

I sighed and pulled my legs under me and stood from there, the manacles making the act awkward but not impossible. With my head turned slightly to the side in order to make sure I didn't hit the ceiling, I looked down at the commander questionly. “Now what?” I asked.

He blinked, the spell growing around his horn suddenly evaporating when he realized I would not in fact, attempt anything violent. “Sergeant, you will be taking the lead, bring this one to the brig, and make sure you enact the wards, I will not have a repeat of last time.”

The smaller stallion gulped and walked in front of me, his tiny little tail tucked firmly between his legs as he took a step out into the hall. I glanced over my shoulder, noticing that the stallion had just finished whispering something to the teal coated mare from earlier. Nodding her head, she took up position behind him, before the commander motioned for me to begin walking. I shrugged and did as I was told, following the terrified little stallion as he led me out of the room and into the hall.

The ceiling remained as low as ever, though this time I had dodge around these strange, glowing blue sticks that sprouted from the ceiling at even intervals. The sticks gave off the light that filled the hall, I quickly realized, as there were no windows or other illumination to speak of. As we walked, I noticed that there were several other rooms much akin to the strange one I had arrived within, save these were all empty, the pony summoners having been apparently evacuated, and recently if the scattering of supplies left behind was any indication.

“Is summoning a human uncommon?” I asked, only to notice that the translation spell seemed to only be on the room itself, as the stallion lifted an eyebrow at me, but otherwise displayed no understanding of what I had said.

An assumption that was proved correct when he spoke back to me in a series of whinnies, snorts, and strange noises one would assume a tiny horse would use to communicate. It was kind of adorable really and I smiled as I listened to them speak back and forth, amused by their odd manner of speech.

Turning a corner, we arrived into a much larger room, that had an enormous sun and moon painted upon the floor. I paused and gave it a look, noticing that it was the same kind of motiff displayed in Canterlot castle. “Odd.” I muttered to myself, looking at it as long as possible while they continued to shuffle me off to wherever the brig was.

So focused was I, that I hardly noticed the rest of my surroundings before I suddenly found myself in a spiral staircase going down. Thankfully the ceiling wasn't too low, as it meant I did not have to bend to the point of hurting myself, though what little bending I did do reminded me that my back still sucked beans at holding me up without causing me pain. Emerging into the basement I looked around to find that although there were jail cells to the right along the wall, the rest of the space was occupied by ponies moving to and fro carrying boxes or stacks of paper.

I shrugged off the strange layout of the building and ignored the obvious security risk that putting storage next to jail cells would mean as evidently this entire building had been converted from what had been an apartment building at one point. The cells themselves were enormous, and contained a cordoned off section that I assumed contained a bathroom, as well as a large bed that was just about big enough for even me to sleep on. Along one wall was a bookshelf that contained several tomes, which I could neither read, nor make out at this distance.

“So how do I get in there?” I asked, pointing out the fact that there were no manner of door or entryway of any kind.

The stallion moved over to the wall and pulled a lever, making eight or so of the central bars to rise into the ceiling. Getting the picture despite the fact that his words were still unintelligible horse noise, I walked inside before turning to the side and wiggling my bound hands at him. “A little help here chief?”

The two ponies went back and forth before the second shook his head at me, evidently fine with leaving me in manacles while already behind bars. Rolling my eyes I flexed my arms and pulled the chains that connected the manacles apart in a single titanic tug before bringing my hands around the front of me, where I pulled the metal wrist warmers off and placed them outside my cell.

My keepers eyes me with naked shock, their weird horse talk going back and forth rapidly, with even the mare joining in. They continued to go back and forth like this for several minutes, during which time I familiarized myself with my new cell that was roughly the size of my old apartment, minus the guest room. It even had a few of the creature comforts like a window near the roof that would have been too high for a pony to see out of, but was at eye level for me. Looking outside, I noted that we were in what looked like a military base of some kind, though it was also converted from what was likely a playground at one point in time, though nothing was left other than a slide and a plaque that was left behind for whatever reason.

Ponies of all shapes, sizes and colors scurried this way and that, most of whom bore military esque cutie marks of some kind. There was a general commotion about the place, and I could notice that the short walls were manned by far more ponies than necessary, many of which cast a curious eye back at the command center I was housed in, as if expecting an attack from either side of their fortifications.

None of them seemed to notice my staring though, meaning it was unlikely that this window was two way and was likely enchanted in some manner. Turning back around I noticed that the toilet was surprising normal and there was even a small shower that would necessitate me crouching to make use of, as well as a sink large enough for me to wash a single hand in at a time.

The entire thing made me feel like I was a giant in the land of dwarves, and as someone that was six foot three, I was used to this feeling to a degree, but never to this sort of level. It was kind of empowering in a way, a fact that was driven home by just how weak, and easily destroyed their everything seemed to be.

Shrugging off this strangeness, I made my way back over to the bars, wherein the three ponies suddenly became silent as I stared down at them. For a moment they said nothing, only for the commander to whisper something to the sergeant, who ran off, a panicked look on his face. I raised an eyebrow and jerked my head in the direction he had just left, asking the question my poor communication could not.

The commander shook his head and covered the mare’s mouth a second after she began to speak. It was funny really, these ponies had so little discipline that it felt more akin to being in the holding cell in a very small and very rural town. There, like here, no one knew what was going on, things were stacked everywhere and some cells were used as storage spaces. I smiled as I thought back to my time spent looking after such cells, as they were the easiest, and most laid back jobs you could get.

Looking back down, I noticed that the mare waved feebly before trotting away, not giving me enough time to wave back, though I did so anyway. Leaving only myself and the commander to stare at one another for nearly a minute.

He grunted unexpectedly before turning and stomping away.

Now alone, and with nothing to do, I parused the books they had set out, and was unsprised to find that I could not read any of them. The language itself was strange, and instantly reminded me of chinese characters or japanese kanji, though there werent any straight lines.

I flipped through the various tomes, trying to find some pictures, or perhaps a translation of some kind.

Despite my best efforts, and hopes, there were no pictures, or way of translating anything into english. Though the characters themselves were interesting to look at, I found myself bored quickly after trying to read the odd writing for more than a few minutes. Placing the book back into the shelf, I fell into the bed and used my hat to cover my eyes and catch a few zs, or at least pretend to anyway.

I was far too excited to truly nap at a time like this, and my mind whirled with thoughts as I lay there, hands behind my head.

It was obvious that they had some kind of interaction with humans at one point or another, as they werent completely shocked by my arrival, but rather they were merely confused, and terrified. I frowned harder the longer I thought about it, as I was coming to the realization that a human must have been summoned in the past only for them to turn out to be a bit of a monster.

Their technology was also lower than the show would have made you think, and magic seemed to replace just about everything, even when it wasn't necessary, or smart to do so, like with jail cell walls, for example. When I had grabbed the bars earlier they had felt weak, as if they could be bent under the perfect amount of force, provided I desired such a thing. Yet when I had used the sink earlier, the handle had felt relatively more solid, and was obviously not magical in any capacity whatsoever.

A thought suddenly struck me, making me realize that something must have gone terribly wrong in this world, as not only were they preparing for war, but they had gotten so desperate as to convert civilian structures to meet their needs. The time frame seemed to fit the show, or at least after it, as the sun and moon shared equal space in that mural, while I assumed it would not have, if Luna had not ascended to the throne after her return.

The longer I thought about it, the more worried I became, not even considering what exactly they would eventually do with me. Something that I logicked away, due to the equestrians seeming very nice on the surface, though a little naive in their own kind of adorable way.

A sudden clang drew my attention up to where a tall white alicorn now stood just outside my cell. It was clearly Celestia, but she appeared far more haggard than she had ever appeared in the show, though than again, the show wasn't exactly animating with top tier software, while this was real bloody life.

I put my hat back on my head and rose quickly, making a show of ducking into a short, but respectful bow. Something that made the alicorn raise an eyebrow at, but otherwise remain unmoved by.

Standing back up I leaned against the wall. “So, did you get a translation spell, or are we both going to end up talking to a wall here?”

“I have not, and we will not.” Celestia spoke, her lips and mouth seemingly fighting her during every english word she spoke.

“You speak english?” I asked.

“I know most demon tongues.” Celestia replied, waving away her confused looking guards who shrugged before pushing everyone else out of the room and leaving us alone.

“Why the whole demon thing? You of all beings must know that we are called humans and we are not red skinned nightmare beasts from hell.” I shot back, before sitting myself on the end of the bed and looking up at her.

“Demon is the equestrian word for human, sort of.” She replied simply, though I got the feeling there was more to it than that. “History lessons can wait, for now I must ask what you are doing here.”

I shrugged. “One minute I was in my home, the next I was here, your mint colored summoner having called my name several times.”

“That's impossible, she could not know the name of a demon, and the spell wasn't calibrated for such a summoning in the first place.” The mare shook her head and sighed. “I will have to speak with her later, if I may, what exactly are you?”

“Didn't we just go over this?” I asked.

Celestia rolled her eyes. “I mean are you a rage demon, a war demon, what manner of demon are you?”

“Uh, a caucasian one? Though I’m one third cherokee on my dad’s side so…” I shrugged again.

The alicorn groaned, planting a hoof against her forehead. “Just tell me what you do.”

“Oh uh, I’m a security guard.” I replied.

“A guard? Really?” The alicorn hummed to herself, a hoof tapping against her chin. “We have never heard of a demon having the profession of a guard before. Do you have any desire to go back to your home? Perhaps friends or family that are waiting for you?”

I shrugged again. “Friends, I guess. Most of my family passed on years ago, and here seems nice, albeit I’d prefer the removal of the prison bars.”

Celestia nodded to herself as she continued to contemplate something.

For several minutes we stood there as she paced back and forth, until she stopped suddenly, facing me once again. “Would you be interested in a job, my fair demon?”

“So long as you call me by name and not just demon all the time, sure. What do you pay?” I inquired, standing up and leaning against the wall.

Celestia seemed repulsed by my suggestion to call me by name, and she recoiled visibly. “Absolutely not, we will refer to you by code names only.”

“Uh sure, I guess.” I muttered, a little confused, but not altogether against the idea. “So what do you pay anyway?”

“Ten bits a week during training and fifteen bits a week after that.” Celestia explained. “If you would like, we could also put half of those bits in a secure account until the end of the war.”

“I suppose you will have me fighting someone than eh?”

She nodded. “We are currently at war with the griffon empire and their colonies.”

“Interesting.” I muttered, tapping my chin.

The prospect of fighting and dying for a country of tiny quadrupeds that hated and feared me was not a pleasant one, but they held a certain innocence to them that made it difficult to hate them. That and they were obviously in desperate need of an edge if they were willing to offer me a place among them.

“I could be convinced to join such an endeavour, provided the benefits were acceptable, and I knew more about your situation.” I continued, standing from the bed and walking over to the bars of my cell, prompting even Celestia to take a step back. “Perhaps we could speak of this somewhere more comfortable, perhaps?”

The alicorn seemed ready to dismiss my suggestion out of hand, only for her to grimace as she seemed to remember something unpleasant. Though the face she made lasted less than a second, I easily caught it, prompting me to wonder if some tragedy had befallen Equestria. The mare nodded, standing a little taller as she tried to appear more confident than she had first looked. “That is… acceptable, though I hope you don't mind if I bring my guards with me.”

“Of course, whatever makes you comfortable princess.” I remarked.

“Strange, I do not remember mentioning my royal status or name for that matter.” She replied, while eying me curiously.

“Your guards are quite talkative.” I lied. “It doesn't take a genius to put two and two together.”

The alicorn seemed to accept my lie, though not wholly, and she eyed me with renewed intensity. “That is true, my guards do seem to have an issue with being rather loose lipped as it were.” She shook her head and grabbed the lever next to the door. “We will speak in my office, and if you accept, your training will begin on the marrow.”

“That would be most acceptable princess, lead the way.” I replied, a wide smile on my face.

Author's Note

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