Anon's Therapy Service

by SoulSpirit

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, Drama, Anon, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Slice of Life
Length: 3428

Anon is the only human in Equestria as you would already know, but here he is also the only therapist in Equestria too.

Anon is the only human in Equestria as you would already know, but here he is also the only therapist in. His business is dying, having no clients, and will have to close soon. Anon's only hope is for business to skyrocket very soon.

Published 2019-05-21 22:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-10-18 22:13:16 UTC

Appointment 1: John Smith

In this strange world full of technicolor ponies, as ludicrous as that sounds, there really isn’t any need for a therapist. All of the sapient creatures here are always so happy. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, but what am I to do? Being a therapist is the only occupation I have the qualifications for.

In my head, I was going through the different options and scenarios as I entered my establishment. I flipped the sign on the door so it displayed the side that said ‘open’ to the already happy world, then rested my head on the glass door and sighed.

“At this rate, I wonder what will happen first. Starvation or depression?” I asked myself. Clearing my thoughts, I left the doorway, making my way to my desk. As I went through the waiting room, I glanced at the decorated walls.

Before I had them decorated, I took some to observe and ask what made most happy. Apparently, my answer was something called a cutie-mark. To me, as a human, it was something silly. To these ponies, however, it represented maturity and their different personalities. Also, they all seem to hold the memory of when they get their mark very dear. So I found a school nearby and asked the teacher there if the students would like to paint various cutie-marks on the walls. The results were better than expected. There were marks of bubbles, instruments, a sun, a moon, butterflies, flowers, the list went on.

I entered the room that is my ‘desk.’ The desk part being a counter window in the wall between the rooms. The room I call my desk was nowhere near as flamboyant as the waiting room. A corner desk relatively near the window, white walls, and an empty calendar that’s on the verge of giving me depression with its constant reminder of my lack of clients.

“Now there’s the joke of the day. World’s only therapist is getting depression.” I mumbled. I tried to offer myself a chuckle, but I lacked the enthusiasm to do so.

I took a seat at my corner desk and did the only thing I could do. Make sure my pencils were sharpened and waste time. Not that I mind though. None of the ponies know me, let alone even notice me, so I don’t have any friends to spend my time with. To be honest, I think it’s because I’m the only human. I must look so bizarre to them.

After a while, the unexpected happened. As usual, I was sitting at my corner des, spinning a pencil through my fingers to fight off boredom. Then I heard the front door open. When this has happened before, it has always only turned out to be a case of being lost. They would realize they have the wrong place, then ask me for directions.

Assuming that this time was no different, I poked my head over the counter. The pony this time was a light brown, almost chestnut, stallion with an even darker brown spiky mane and tail along with blue eyes, red tie, and an hourglass for his mark. I wasn’t in the mood and was going to be straight to the point, but seeing this stallion wearing a tie humored me. So, to show some appreciation, I remained as professional as I could.

“Good morning, Sir,” I greeted over the counter. “How may I help you?” I asked as the stallion walked over to the counter.

“Ah, yes, good morning. I was hoping to schedule an appointment.” as he finished speaking his request, I thought I was hearing things.

“I’m sorry, Sir. Could you say that again?”

“I would like to make an appointment,” he repeated. I couldn’t believe my ears. Thinking that I must a have fallen asleep earlier and that I’m currently dreaming, I continued.

“Sure thing, Sir. when would you like to have it scheduled?” I asked, taking out a pencil.

“I was hoping if I could have it now if you don’t mind.” I froze, dropping the pencil. I appreciated the nice dream, but there should be a limit on how much of a tease they are allowed to be. “IS there a problem?” I refocused.

“N-no. on the contrary, I’ll be honest. It made me very happy to hear that.” he looked confused by what I said. “To answer your request, yes. We can go ahead and have the session right now.” he brightened up.

“Thank you.”

“Let’s head to the private room in the back. I’m also obligated to tell you that I am required to keep all information about you and everything you say to me a secret unless it’s life threatening, then I have to report it.” I said as I got off the seat. Upon hearing this, the Stallion seemed to relax a little and lost any nervous feelings he might have had.

“That’s fortunate to hear. The name’s John. John Smith.” he added as he came through the door to my side of the counter.

“Anonymous, but you can just call me Anon.” I introduced. “Please, follow me, and we’ll get started.” I lead him through the door on the back side of the room which leads into the therapy room.

The therapy room was something special. It didn’t need anything like music or art to make it relaxing. In fact, the only things in the room were two chairs facing each other. Thought, that’s all that’s really needed for this room. This room was enchanted with a special spell. This spell allowed me to choose an occupant of the room and then the room would make the surrounding area change completely, looking like we were in a new location. A flawless illusion of sorts. The location is to be one the occupant either finds most comforting or holds most dear. Whichever is most appropriate for the situation.

When we entered the room, it looked like we were standing in the cast depths of the cosmos with many solar systems, comets, black holes, and others or the sort.

“Mmm….interesting,” I commented as we proceeded to take our seats.

“It is. I can’t think of how this is possible,” he replied, clearly misunderstanding what I was talking about.

“It’s a special spell enchanting the room. We’re not actually in space. That’s not what I meant, though. What’s interesting about it is you.” after that, he looked all sorts of confused. So I decided to explain before I got stormed with questions. “The spell lets me choose an occupant in the room for it to affect. Then, it makes it look like we’re in the location that occupant either holds most dear or finds most comforting. So when I said ‘interesting,’ I meant the connection between you and deep space.”

“Well, that couldn't be any more true. I love space. To me, space represents true freedom with no limitations or costs.” he explained, his voice matching that of a preacher that really would marry religion when they are given the chance to preach.

“That’s a good way to view it. Though, something’s telling me that that’s not what you needed to talk about.” I replied. He sighed, closing his eyes and dropping his head down.

“You’re right.” he raised his head back up to look at me. “May I ask you something?”

“That’s what I’m here for.”

“Am I right in my understanding that, as a human, you aren’t from around here?” that question hit deep.

“That would be the understatement of the year, but you are right. I’m not.” I answered.

“So, you should know better than most how it feels to be homesick?” I saw where this was going, but it would be rude to cut him off. So I played along while remaining honest. It wouldn’t help him to lie in any sort of way.

“I would think so,” I answered.

“How bad is it?”

“Well, for the longest time, it was almost unbearable. Taking into account that my species is the only one that’s sapient where I’m from, you could probably imagine how it was like when I found talking equines. It’s like coming home and finding out that your dog can talk. All I could think of was the few possible explanations like being drunk, high on drugs, or that I might have gone insane. Eventually, I decided that I was dreaming. That is until I realized that too much time had passed for it to be a dream. After another series of events, I realized that I had no choice but to accept the situation and adjust. That doesn’t mean I don’t miss it though. The place I came from.” I had to try hard to remember not to say ‘world.’ Then he asked exactly what I thought he would.

“Yes, that’s it. That’s what I mean. How do you cope with the feeling?” I sighed as he spoke.

“Well, you see, that’s a little difficult to explain. You kinda do, but at the same time, you kinda don’t.”

“I don’t understand, Anon.”

“Let me explain. You kinda do because you have to adjust to your current situation and move on with your life. But when one does this, they tend to try and forget their past to try to make it easier. This does work in a sense, but it’s not how you should go about it.”

“It’s not?” I shook my head in response. “Then what is?”

“This is where it gets weird. This is the part where you kinda don’t move on. This is the part when one should know that it’s better if they don’t forget. See, it’s important to keep your memories. They’re what made you who you are now. That’s more important than what you would think.” I finished and gave him time to process the information. He didn’t say anything for a good six or seven minutes. I was almost convinced he was staring off when he finally spoke.

“I think I get it. Thank you. I really appreciate it, Anon.” he said before getting up.

“Your very welcome Mr.Smith,” I replied as I got up too. I led us out of the room to the lobby. “Hope you have a nice day.”

“Wait, do I owe you for the service?” he expression matched the confusion in his voice.

“Nope.”

“Why?” I know I have sighed a lot, but this time was the heaviest it’s been.

“Well, as sad as it sounds, I’m going out of business. Even if I charged you, it wouldn’t be enough to keep the place going.”

“How? You’re the only therapist anywhere. No competition.”

“There’s a reason for it too. How many ponies do you know are depressed?” I walked back and took a seat at my corner desk.

“How about this. Keep the place open a few more days. If the business doesn’t pick up by then, I’ll take you to get some food, my treat.”

It sounded like bait, but at the rate business was going, I couldn’t afford to pass up a chance for free food.

“Deal”

Author's Note

Drop a like, leave a comment, and I hope you've enjoyed.

Appointment 2: Derpy

The next morning, I was enjoying an apple as I entered my establishment, flipped the sign to open on the door, then went over to my corner desk. If things went like they would on an average day, I’d receive no clients and the day will be wasted. Not that it really mattered. Unless if business suddenly skyrocketed in the next few days, I would be forced to close down for good.

Sitting down, I tossed my apple core into the can and began to waste the day away once more. I must have been sitting there for hours. I was dreadfully bored. Then, something peculiar happened. A gray pegasus mare entered the establishment.

She’s definitely got the wrong place. I wouldn’t blame her either. Having a lazy eye, I can only guess what her vision’s like. Don’t get me wrong, I mean no offense by it. In fact, her eyes have a unique charm of their own. They just confused me a little was all. The gold color of her mane and tail were also pleasant to see. Overall, she gave off a nice aura around her and it made my morning.

“Good morning, Miss.” I greeted. “How may I help you?”

“A friend recommended me to come here. Are you Anonymous?” she asked. So far, everything about her tells me she’s going to be a bubbly, silly type. That’s fine though. By friend, I’m guessing she means John Smith.

“Yes, I am. Please, call me Anon instead.” she came over to the counter.

“Thank goodness, I was afraid that I found the wrong place again.” wait, did she say ‘again’? I guess she’s had a hard time.

“Well, you’re here now. How may I be of service to you?”

“Oh, right. I would like to make an appointment.”

“When would you like your appointment?” I asked as I bent down to get a pencil from the bottom drawer.

“When’s the next time you’re free?”

“Right now actually,” I grunted as I bent back up, pencil in hand. “So you can have your appointment anytime.”

“Well, I have to finish my mail route first,” she gestured to the saddlebags full of envelopes that I haven’t noticed till now. “So how about in an hour?”

“Sure. What’s your name?”

“Derpy Hooves,” she answered as she turned and left in a hurry. I wrote her appointment down for documentation.

Derpy? That can’t be her real name. Sounds more like a cruel nickname. I can only imagine her foal hood with that kind of name. Hope she won’t mind discussing it. I’m also curious about what the therapy room has for her.

The dreadfully boring hour passed by and the peculiar gray mare came back. This time, she brought a bag containing two muffins with her.

“Good afternoon,” I greeted. “Having lunch I see.” she came over to the counter. When she did, she placed the muffins from the bag onto the counter.

“Actually, these are for you. I thought you would like to have some,” she said with an innocent smile.

Bless her soul. Usually, ponies would never pay me a second glance or even acknowledge my existence. That makes life harder than it should. This pegasus used her hard earned money to buy me some muffins. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say there was going to be a catch. However, I do know better and it made feel bad a little. Or guilty. At this point, I wasn’t sure. I also don’t want to hurt one like her and I knew that refusing the offer would do just that.

“Thank you, I appreciate it.” I reached over, grabbed one of the buffins, and bit into it. It was banana nut. I couldn’t remember the last time a merchant acknowledged me long enough for me to buy a banana.

“No problem.” Derpy had a cheerful voice and a smile that couldn’t possibly be faked.

“I hope you don’t mind that I save the other one for later.”

“It’s fine.”

“So, would you like to begin your session?” I asked.

“Yes please.” I got up as she answered.

“Alright, before we go in the back, I’m obligated to tell you that I’m required to keep any and all information about you and about what you say confidential unless if it’s for your safety.” she looked like she took comfort in hearing me say that. “Now, if you would follow me to the therapy room, we can get started.” after voicing my instructions, she came around.

I led her to the therapy room. When We walked in, I was surprised at first, expecting something a little more exotic or symbolic, but the more I thought about it the more it made sense. What I walked into just some ordinary bedroom that I assumed to belong to Derpy. There was your standard bed, a nightstand next to it, a bookshelf along the wall, a dresser with a few brushes and a mirror on it, a rug in the middle, and a nice little fireplace in the corner. I proceeded to take a seat in one of the two chairs in the middle of the room, both facing each other.

“Why do you have a replica of my room?” I heard Derpy ask as she followed me in.

“I don’t. It’s just an illusion. A spell that takes the appearance of a location the chosen occupant holds most dear. In this case, the chosen occupant is you.” I explained as she took a seat.

“Okay, that makes sense and is a lot less creepy.”

“Before moving on, there is something I would like to discuss. If you don’t mind.”

“Um...sure. What is it?” she asked, looking slightly confused.

“Your name.”

“Pardon?”

“Your name,” I repeated. “Derpy doesn’t sound like a real name. It sounds like a cruel nickname given to make fun of you. What I want to know is, what is your real name?” I explained.

She had a bashful look on her face. That alone told me that it wasn’t a common thing for her to discuss and that I probably shouldn’t have asked.

“Sorry, I probably shouldn’t push the topic. Forgive me.” I apologized.

“No, it’s okay. I’ve just never had somepony ask me for my real name. It’s Ditzy. Ditzy Doo. Ditzy explained, sounding proud.

“Well Dittzy, now that we got that straightened out, how about begin?” I proposed.

“Sure thing, Anon Sir.” I started to really enjoy the optimism she had.

“Alright, so what seems to be the problem?” after asking that, she started looking sad.

“Actually, it’s about the name.” she pointed out. What a coincidence.

“What about it?”

“It’s been getting to me lately. I don’t know what to do about it.”

So, basically, just some advice about bullying, except for an adult. Though, it would be wrong for me to just assume, so it wouldn’t hurt to probe for more information.

“I could give random advice, but nothing useful yet. I’m going to need some more detail first. If that’s alright.”

“Sure, that makes sense. I was given the name ‘Derpy’ because of how clumsy I am. Sometimes I tend to get lost where most wouldn’t and I also tend to cause accidents.” she explained. I could see where this was going.

“Okay, I’ll be honest. I’m no miracle worker. I won’t be able to stop the teasing or fix things like being clumsy. However, what I am here to do is to help you deal with it. What I need to know is if you trust me.” I explained.

“What?”

“If you don’t trust me, then there is no point in me giving advice because then you will more than likely just ignore it.”

“O-of course I trust you.”

“Good. Tell me. Out of all of the ponies that make fun of you, how many of them are actual friends?”

“Um….none of them,” she replied.

“Exactly. That’s why neither they or what they say, matters. If you ever forget that, I know something that you won’t.” she started to look nervous.

“What’s that?” she asked.

“You heart. It’s strong, that I can see. If you’re ever in doubt, just listen to your heart and it’ll be your guide.” as I spike, Ditzy looked awestruck for a moment. I gave her time to process the information.

“I see. Thank you Anon. you have no idea how helpful you’ve been.” she finally said.

“I probably do.” I countered. “If that’s all, then how about we wrap up and you can continue on with your life, only now a little happier I hope.” I got up.

“Sure.” she agreed as she got up too. I lead her out of the Illusional room and into the lobby. “So, how much do I owe you?”

I didn’t want to charge her. My establishment was going to close down soon anyway. However, I did make a deal with John and I’m a man on my word. Besides, I needed something to pay for my next meal.

“Ten bits,” I answered. She poured the bits from a bag and placed a small pile on the counter.

“Good luck, Anon.”

“Same to you.” I offered. Then she left.

Author's Note

Drop a like, leave a comment, and I hope you've enjoyed.

Appointment 3: Fluttershy

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Appointment 4: Princess Twilight Sparkle

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Appointment 5: Screwball

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Appointment 6: Princess Celestia

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Epilogue

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