The Main 6 Sees a Psychiatrist

by Lunar Blood TR

Rating: everyone
Tags: Main 6, Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia
Length: 2555

What exactly does it take to sit on the throne? Try and guess.

Celestia and Luna are going to retire and they have selected their successors. But what does it take to sit on the throne? Let me tell you one of them, a stable mental state. Who would've thaught?

Don't take this seriously! Writing things like this helps me, if you find it offensive, just don't read it or go on and dislike it! But writing this doesn't mean I'm an horrible person! It's just a coping way!

Published 2019-06-07 00:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-06-07 00:00:01 UTC

Wait What?!

Author's Note

Hey guys. I really didn't want to countinue Red Nights. I'll re-post it as soon as I find my sprit to write that again. Anyways,

Twilight's talk and thoughts are colored this.

Rarity's talk and thoughts are colored this.

Fluttershy's are this.

Pinkie's are this.

Applejack's are colored this.

Rainbow Dash's are this color.

Celestia's are this.

Luna's are this.

Spike's are this.

And finally, Sunny Garden's (the psychiatrist's) are colored this.

Hope you enjoy and please tell any spelling mistake I make.

Wait What?!

It was a sunny day in all of Equestria. All of our favorite heroes were on a train, on the way to Canterlot. None of them having an idea of what waited them in the Castle.

The train looked pretty empty except the main 6 and Spike. They were seated in silence, waiting patiently to arrive in Canterlot.

'Besides, who knows what Celestia and Luna wants this time?'

Suddenly, the silence was broken by Rainbow Dash. Who seemed to be bored from waiting. "Does anypony know what the Princesses wants again? I don't have anything against them, really, but I was in the middle of my nap! Do you know how much energy you need when you're as awesome as I am?"

"Oh but it must be pretty important if they decided to call us all the way to Canterlot! U-Ummmm... At least I-I hope?" Fluttershy answered.

"Don't worry Darling. We're all busy ponies and Celestia wouldn't summon us without a reason." Rarity suddenly turned to the only pony who didn't talk throught the ride even a little bit. "Right, Twilight?"

Twilight, who didn't listen to this conversation fully, jerked her head from the book she was trying to read. "O-Oh, you said s-something Rarity?" Twilight sheepishly asked.

"Indeed, I did Darling. Is something wrong? You have been as quiet as dear Applejack over there! And she's sleeping! Not a fair compation, is it?"

"I-I guess not..? B-But.. what about... Pinkie? Yes, Pinkie what about her? Where is she?" Twilight asked. Hoping they would take the bait and leave her alone.

Rarity took a moment to consider what she said. "Now that I think about it... Where's Pinkie dears? Surely, she can grab a snack within a hour! But let's not forget who we're talking about.. -Nice try, Darling! Let's get back to our topic, shall we?"

"L-Let's not..?" Twilight squeked.

"Well you have to tell-" Rarity began, unable to finish as the train arrived at their destination, Canterlot. "We're finishing this, later. Hmmmmph. Saved by the train." Said Rarity as she woke Applejack up and Pinkie came from where she went earlier, bouncing.

Pinkie giggled. "You guys won't belive what I fou-! *GASP* Are we in Canterlot?! Let's go see what the princess wants!" With that, Pinkie bounced away.

Twilight shook her head. 'I'll never understand her.'

The main 6 and Spike hastily trotted towards the throne room Princess Celestia waited at with Princess Luna.

When they arrived at said room, the Royal Guards guarding the throne let them pass without saying anything. Nothing, at all.

The big and showy doors opened to let them in. The second they were in the room, they were rewarded with the sight of Princesses Celestia and Luna standing with a mare neither of the main 6 nor Spike knew.

The main 6, except Twilight, and Spike bowed at the sight of them. Celestia merely chuckled while Luna countinued to stand there, looking nearly emotiontless. Thought the slight and genuine smile on her face told them she was truly happy to see them after, not so long, but still long.

''Welcome my little ponies is what I would normally say but you 6 are about to have the throne.
So I guess you're not my ponies anymore, are you? Anyway, there's one final test you all have to pass so I can give you the throne. I belive Doctor Sunny Garden will tell you what it is.'' Celestia said as the yellow coated mare with lime green mane and eyes, who they belived was Sunny Garden, walked towards them.

''Thank you, Princess. You all have to get cleared as 'Mentally Stable' before you get to sit on the throne.''

''Why do we have to? Didn't we save Equestria, I don't know 5 or 6 times already?!''

''We areth sorry, young Rainbow Dash. Thou, all of thou, should hasth knowest why this is neccesarry. You hasth seen what happened to King Sombra, Tirek, Discord AND Us. Blinded by our want and need for power.'' Luna paused for a minute. ''This isth why thou hasth to pass this test to be on the throne. And that's not all, thou has to take this test every one year.''

Twilight gulped and asked, ''What if none of us pass? What happens if all of us pass but one year later, when we have to get tested again, one of us or all of us fail?''

''Don't worry this much, My Faithful Student. To answer your first question in the unlikely case none of you pass, me and Luna will countinue to rule until one of you pass. For your other question, if that happens she will have to get treated and has to take the test again until she can take her position back on the throne. If all of you fail, Luna and I will come back until you're cleared to take back the throne.'' Explained Celestia.

''Doesth thou understand?'' Luna asked. The main 6 nodded their heads, conforming they were indeed ready.

''Then let us go ponies!'' Sunny Garden said. Spike roughly cleared his throat. ''A-And drake too, I-I guess..?'' Sunny Garden tried to correct her statement. Spike turned his back and 'Hmmmph'ed at Sunny Garden. Sunny Garden quietly gave a nervous laugh.

Spike sighed. ''Whatever. Let's go already.'' With that, he walked out of the throne room.

A minute later, he poked his head back in th throne room as he chuckled nervously and asked, ''Where were we to go again, anyway?'' Everypony laughed, some even rolling on the ground (like Rainbow and Pinkie) as they laughed so hard their sides hurted.

*AHEM*

They snapped out of it. ''So? Where are we going to go? That's it, if you remember.'' That made everypony burst out laughing like crazy again. Tears starting to come out of their eyes. The only exception was Sunny Garden who, instand of laughing, was blushing perhaps a little heavily.

''OKAY! That is enough, let's go and do that test already!''

As they walked down the halls of the Castle, Twilight figured they were going to somewhere near the medical wing. She took a second to think, trying to guess where it would be.

After a little more walking, they arrived at a wing entirely new to Twilight. "Where are we? I didn't know this wing existed."

Sunny Garden smiled. "It's normal that you don't know about here. Celestia ordered this wing to be made after Luna returned. You didn't came to this side of the Castle after you moved to Ponyville." She explained. Twilight nodded her head in understanding.

"So what do we have to do? Is it fancy magic stuff?" Applejack asked.

"Oh, it's really easy. All you have to do is answer my questions and the like."

"That's it? I thought something like this would be complicated egghead stuff."

"If y-you don't mind me a-asking... H-How does this w-work?"

"I don't mind, but, that would take too much time. Time we could use testing you. Don't worry tho, you'll see it's a piece of cake!"

Suddenly, Pinkie perked up. "A CAKE?!? Where is it?! WHERE!?!"

Everypony decided to just ignore her. After all, it's just Pinkie being Pinkie.

After testing all of the Main Six, Sunny Garden reached a worrying and mind shattering content.

"HOW IN CELESTIA'S AND LUNA'S FREAKIN' GLOWY MANE THINGIES AND TAILS DOES ALL THE HEROES OF EQUESTRIA HAVE MENTAL DISORDERS!?!?!" Shouted Sunny Garden as she tried to tear her mane from her head. Spike just sat there, unamused.

"I always knew there had to be something wrong with these ponies. You don't see Pinkie and not think 'there is definetely something wrong with her' then there's Twilight and Fluttershy. Don't get me started on Twilight and Fluttershy. The others too, I guess." whispered Spike.

"I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND WHY NONE OF YOU ARE SUICIDAL- Wait, that's a good thing! Don't go killing yourselves!- BESIDES APPLEJACK, THAT SANE ANGEL OVER THERE," Applejack blushed and muttered a quiet 'Thank you, Ah guess...' "ALL OF YOU HAVE MORE THAN ONE DISORDER!" Sunny Garden countinued to shout.

"Umm... I may h-have... tried to kill myself that one time, and the other, and the other other AND the other other OTHER time, I guess... But I did it to test if I had truly become immortal! H-Honest! He he he..."

"OH, CELESTIA'S BUCKIN' FLANK! THAT'S GREAT, THE YOUNGER OF THE IMMORTAL ALICORNS IS SUICIDAL! WITH MENTAL DISORDERS! That's so, Celestia Damned, great! That was sarcasm, don't go commit suicide again it isn't any good for you or anypony!"

Sunny Garden turned and grabbed Rainbow Dash. "Let's start with you! You have Intellectual disability and Hypersomnolence with an ego the size of this Moon cursed Castle!"

Rainbow looked confused. "What even are these? Whatever. I have to go and take my afternoon nap, if I don't I'll be really really grumpy. See ya!" With that said, Rainbow setteled on a big couch and started snoring.

Sunny Garden turned to Rarity and pointed a hoof to her. "YOU definitely have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder also known as OCD! You're also trying to please everypony which is not healty at all! Maybe a good thing for a princess to have, but. Still. Not. Healty. You're also a perfectionist!”

Rarity was too busy trying to tidy Sunny Garden's office thingy to really pay attantion to what she said. "Everything MUST be perfect."

Sunny Garden pointed her hoof to Pinkie this time. "I don't really want to even think about you. But, one thing I can %100 say is that you have a SERIOUS case of borderline personality disorder and Add / Adhd! With an eating disorder!"

Pinkie gigled. "Oh, I guess you can't hide anymore, Pinkamena."

Her giggle greatly disturbed Sunny Garden.

She countinued to adress their mental disorders anyway. "FLUTTERSHY! You have both Social Anxiety and avoidant personality disorders!"

Fluttershy squeked and hid behind her mane.

"Applejack! You're the most sane one here! You deal with stress and you're an work alcoholic! But that's mostly it." Sunny Garden silently thanked Applejack for being the sane one here.

"Not that bad, Ah guess." Applejack said.

Sunny Garden sighed and nervously turned towards Twilight. Twilight looked back at her and set the book she was reading down.

"So what's it with me?" Twilight asked calmly. Surely she couldn't have that much issues.

Sunny Garden laughed, a disturbing sound to her own ears. "Oh please, Sweet Merciful Celestia! Oh boy! I don't know where to even start with you! It's a good thing you're immortal! Trust me, it is. First, you have OCD like Rarity. Second, you have schizophrenia. Third, you have some bi-polar thing going on. Fourth, aspergers. Lasty, you might and probaly have depression." Sunny Garden explained.

Twilight recoiled back. How in Luna's moon did SHE have that many disorders? Now that she thought about it, it really was a good thing she was immortal. After all, she could just hang herself when it got bad and still be alive. She definetly didn't want to die only to dissapoint Celestia. Her line of thought was inturrupted when Sunny Garden decided to start shouting again.

"ALL OF YOU ARE INSANE,- DON'T THINK I'M NOT INTO YOU APPLEJACK! I KNOW YOU MUST HAVE POST TRAUMATIC SOMETHING! EVEN THEN, YOU'RE THE SANE ANGEL OF THIS GROUP!- INSANE! I TELL YOU, I-N-S-A-N-E! ALL OF YOU SHOULD BE IN A SUICIDE WATCH, ESPECIALLY YOU TWILIGHT, IN A MENTAL HOSPITAL! MENTAL! HOSPITAL! YOU ARE ALL CELESTIA AND LUNA DAMNED INSANE! I'm out! I don't even know what to do anymore! Spike go freakin' tell the results to the princesses! I'm going to bang my head against a wall until this makes sense!" With that, Sunny Garden walked towards a wall and banged her head against said wall. Then she did it again. And again. And again.

Spike still watched this unamused. "Sure, whatever. Let's go girls. And somepony wake the hell up Rainbow.

Pinkie got a bucket of ice cold water from somewhere only she knows and dumped it on Rainbow Dash. She then giggled and made a joke about rainbows getting wet and bounced with Dash flying beside her, grumbling about ice cold water and getting back at Pinkie.

"So Spike, since Sunny Garden's not here, mind telling me their results?" Celestia asked with the same serene smile always plastered on face.

"Uh huh. Let me tell you first, you ain't getting that vacation you want." Spike answered.

Luna gasped. "Did truly none of them pass? Not one of them?!?" Said Luna in shock.

Spike shook his head no. "Nope. None of them. Did you know that Twilight commited suicide several times but didn't die none of those times because she was immortal? Sunny Garden shouted something about having all the girls on Suicide Watch in a Mental Hospital. And she also shouted that they were insane and Applejack might be silightly sane, apparently."

Celestia and Luna paled, they shouted at the same time "SUICIDE WATCH?!?!?!" "MENTAL HOSPITAL?!?!?" Then they shouted the same sentence "SHE DID WHAT?!?!"

Spike crossed his tiny arms. "Yep and yep, She commited suicide. So for their mental disorders...
Applejack has stress and slight post traumatic something and is a work alcoholtic,
Rarity has OCD and she's a perfectionist,
Fluttershy has social anxiety and avoidant personality disorders,
Rainbow Dash has intellectual disabilty and Hypersomnolence, whatever that is,
Pinkie Pie has borderline personality disorder, add / adhd and a serious eating disorder,
And finally, Twilight has first, OCD. Second, schizophrenia. Third, she has some bi-polar thing going on. Fourth, aspergers. Lasty, she has slight depression." Spike listed.

Celestia and Luna recoiled back again. "Twilight has all that?!? And Pinkie? What is happening in this world?"

"Honestly, the only real suprises were Pinkie, except that eating disorder, and Twilight" Luna said.

"Yeah, well you aren't having your vacation now. Again, you should put them in a mental hospital and have some of them on suicide watch. I'm going back to Ponyville tho. You'll send them back after all is said and done with that Mental Hospital." Spike said as he walked towards the door. The guards opened it for him and he slipped between the huge doors.

The guards closed the door behind him. One guard looked at Celestia and Luna and asked, "Should we alert Canterlot's best Mental hospital and tell them to put Princess Twilight on suicide watch?"

It didn't take Celestia long to answer him. "Yes, you shall. And somepony, please bring Sunny Garden here. I would like to talk in detail with her."

The guards stauled and set of to do their task.

After mins of silence, Luna turned to her sister and asked, "No vacation?"

Celestia sighed and conformed Luna's sentence. "No vacation."