Another Q joke

by Tech_Priest

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Angel, Spike, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Crossover, Main 6, Princess Luna, Original Character
Length: 23011

The next Gen X My little Pony

While returning from a mapping mission with the Enterprise, Picard finds that Q wants to have fun at his cost and sends him into an unwilling trip to Equestria.

______________________________________________

CAUTION! English is not my native language, there may be some spelling mistakes

Published 2011-12-14 00:10:55 UTC
Last updated 2012-01-07 15:32:16 UTC

Why don't you just leave me alone?

It was a calm Sunday on the bridge of the Enterprise 1701-D, after a simple cartography scan mission at the edge of the Federation space, the only 3 remaining crew members at the bridge were Data, ensign Noble and La Forge (who were there just to run a few simulations of the new warp core adjustments).

In his ready room, the captain rested, drinking his Earl Gray tea and recording his daily Log.

Captain’s log

Star Date 47632.2

The mission went well, despite the small gravitational anomalies we founded, noting happened and we are now on our way back to the Federation Outpost 42 and…

All of the sudden, a bright flash of light filled the room.

“Computer, stop recording.”

He looked around, nothing.

Well, must have been a pulsar or my mind playing tricks. He Thought.

“Computer, resume recor-”

“Hello Jean-Luc!”

The captain dropped his tea at the ground and looked to the source of that voice

“Q!!!”

“Oh! You remember me! How sweet of you!”

“What are you doing here?”

“Well…” He began to explain “There was I, walking through the core of a Neutron Star, when I though “What is that my favorite captain is doing right now?”, Then, I decided to check!”

Picard had a serious look on his face.

“You know I won’t buy such explanation.”

“Yes, I do.” Q said, with that sarcastic face of his “But if I told you the exact reason behind every one of my visits, it wouldn’t be fun, would it?”

Picard and Q starred at each other for about ten seconds, before Jean-Luc asked again

“What. Do. You. Want. With. Me?”

“I. Want. Fun!”

Jean-Luc sighed.

“I don’t have time for this.” He said, taking the cup of tea from the ground and walking towards the replicator to get another Earl Gray, if Q was going to insist on this nonsense, he was going to need to a nice tea to calm down.

“You know Picard” Said Q “The thing is I just remembered I never took you on a trip through a parallel universe, so I decided to do so!”

Picard kept his serious look.

“Q, you know I don’t want to-“

“Yes! Yes, I know! But that is the fun part! If it was planned it wouldn’t be an adventure!”

“*face palm*”

“Oh, c’mon! What happened to the “Explore strange new worlds and seek out for new civilizations?”

“I prefer to do so from the Enterprise Bridge, thanks!”

“Why, Piccard, WHY?!? Your antecessor was so much more energetic!” Q said, materializing a picture of James T. Kirk “He actually beamed down to planets instead of ordering his crew to do so!”

“It was a different time Q; it was almost 80 year ago!”

“That is no reason for you not to do so!”

Piccard sighed; he knew that Q wouldn’t give up in his attempt to annoy him. But he wouldn’t give up on resisting as well.

“For the last time Q: Get. Of. My. Ship!”

“Ok!”

A flash of light suddenly filled the room with light, but instead of finding himself alone on his ready room, Piccard founded himself along with Q in what seemed like a dark corridor, with several doors on each side, extending for what seemed like an infinite number of miles.

Each door had a combination of a maximum of 4 symbols on each, they varied from simple things (like a stick-man), to extremely complex ones, with seemed like a series of concentric circles, curves and dots, which appeared be part of very advanced type of alien-hieroglyphically based language.

“Now, which one should I send you to?” Q said

“Q!!!!”

“Don’t worry Picard; I am not going to put you on any kind of dangerous situation, unless you put yourself into one” Q said, with that characteristic  sarcastic smile of his on his face.

Piccard was going to start a sentence, but Q interrupted and said:

“Don’t worry about the Enterprise; I’ll make sure that they won’t run into any sort of trouble myself.” He said, with a more serious look on his face.

“Q, I don’t care if you are going to turn the Enterprise’s hull into pure gold! GET ME BACK TO MY SHIP!!!”

Q didn’t even listen to Picard; he seemed too busy picking a door.

He stopped in front of that door that had the alien-hieroglyph, plus a box, a bow tie and what seemed like a screwdriver handle with a light at the point.

“Nope! If I do this, I am going to turn that 2 hearted chaotic-messiah mad for good.”

He kept walking through the corridor, Picard being forced to follow due the lack of alternatives and the fact that Q didn’t seem to be unable to hear anything else other than his own thoughts.

He tried to start an argument with Q a few more time, with no avail.

He stopped again in front of two doors, one had a crowbar, a lambda, a radiation warning and what seemed as a stick-man running through a hole. The second had a crystal, an armored solider, a humanoid creature with no mouth and almost double the size of the solider and an somewhat bizarre creature that looked like the cross of a flea with an octopus.

On both those doors, Q stopped, thought, and left it behind with a face of disapproval.

He finally stopped and smiled at a door after rough 20 minutes, with an smile so large that went almost all the way to his ears.

“This will do perfectly!”

The door had a smile face, a sun, a moon and what seemed the cross between a unicorn and a Pegasus.

“Q, I am going to tell you one last time: GET ME BACK TO MY SHIP!”

“Now,” Q said, as if Piccard didn’t talk at all “when you get there you are going to feel some pain and your body will start to glow in an aura of white light. But don’t worry; your body will be just adjusting himself to the new environment. Bye!!!”

And Q pushed Piccard trough the door.

“Q!!!”

“Have fun!” Q said, waving to Picard as he fell through what seemed an entire universe.

He landed in what seemed like a small forest.

“Merde, maintenant j’ AHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

His sentence was cut short by an excruciating pain. Then (just as Q told) his body started to glow in a bright white light. He passed out.

When he woke up, for some reason he could not walk on his feet, only with his four limbs on the ground. But as he looked to his hands, he realized the why:

They were hooves.

To seek out new life

“Q!”

No answer.

Damn! Wait…

“Jean-Luc Picard, Serial number: SP 937-215!”

My god! I can talk! I am a talking pony!!!

Picard looked around him, he seemed to be inside a small forest, there was a pond nearby that he decided would be a fine source of water to his (after all that happened)  dry lips. It would also provide a way to see what he looked like, now that he was an equine.

He stopped at the margin of the pond and stared a few seconds.

A light-brown colt stared back, he didn’t have any hair at his head, but down his neck there was a gray-silver mane, his tail was also the same shade of gray. His muzzle was squared and his eyes were still the same.

Piccard noticed that he was still wearing his clothes (though modified to fit on his new body) and still had his comm. badge with him. He checked his belt (now located ¾ of the way to his flanks) and founded that he also had his phaser.

Now, how am I supposed to use a phaser without thumbs or fingers?

He took it with his hooves and aimed at a nearby rock, it proved to be virtually impossible to fire and aim at the same time, but by using the two forward hooves, in a quick motion it was possible to fire with the same accuracy as if he was still human.

Much better.

He leaned forward and drank a few sips; the water was fresh and felt reinvigorating.

“Q!!!!”

Still no response.

“Q!!!”

He wasn’t around, or he was but wouldn’t show up.

“WHERE SHOULD I GO?”

Silence.

Damn. Guess I will have to pick at random.

He looked around, at his front there was the pond were he drank the water a few moments ago, to his back, the forest seemed to grow so thick that no light went through the tree tops. To his left, the forest was less thick, but seemed to go on forever. To his right, it seemed to get sparse.

Right it is.

He started to walk.

    _________________________________________________________

“Okay Twilight! That was the last one.” The baby dragon said, sliding an red book into the bookshelf.

“Thanks Spike! We did it, the library is impeccably clean!” The lavender unicorn mare said, a smile in her face.

There was a knock on the door.

“Come in!”

A pink pony, with pink mane made her way from the door to Twilight, hoping all the way.

“Hi Twi! Would you mind if I borrow a book?”

“Not at all Pinkie! Which one will it be?” She said, walking towards the cooking section.

“Two actually! The quantum mechanics of the multiverse (by Sheldon Hoofer) and Bending the space time (by Gordon Freemane)!!!”

Twilight stared blankly at Pinkie, whose smile didn’t move an inch.

“Pinkie dear, why on Equestria would you need these books???”

“I don’t know!” She started to hop around Twilight, as if orbiting her. “But my knee cramps and ear flops seem to think it is important that I know!”

Her Pinkie sense is acting again. Celestia help us all!

“Okay, Spike! You heard the mare.”

“Right away!” The small dragon said, walking towards the physics bookshelf.

He came back in a few seconds, with two heavy looking books under his arms.

“Here! Hope you can understand it.”

“Okie-dokie-lokie!” She took the books and put them inside her mane. “Have a nice day!” And she made her way to the door, bouncing as though there were no tomorrow.

After the door was closed, Twilight turned her head to her assistant and asked.

“Spike, do we have extra copies of those two books?”

“Yes, why?”

“Get them.” She started to walk towards her studies desk. “I want to know if there is anything there that is dangerous and can be done by a pony”

I just hope she doesn’t explode the universe…

         _________________________________________________________________________

Picard had been walking for about five minutes now; he tried calling Q with no effect and decided he would find him somewhere ahead.

The path was in the middle of the forest, and the number of trees was reducing at a small, but constant rate.

I will be out of this forest in 10 minutes, if it wasn’t all just part of a Q’s joke, I could even have enjoyed this walk.

It was, indeed, a beautiful place, it reminded Picard of his childhood in La Barre, the only thing missing was a vineyard and a fine bottle of wine.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”

He immediately looked to the source of the voice. Q was lying down at the side of a bush, still in his human form, reading a book called ‘Pinkie’s mind: A Q’s guide to organized chaos’

“Q. This is pleasant and all, but I must go back to the Enterprise at once.”

“Oh Picard!” He got up and the book disappeared with a small flash of light. “I already told you. The Enterprise will be safe; besides, it’s always nice to go on a stroll”

“I prefer to have my strolls at vacation or at the holodeck, thank you!”

Q closed his eyes and started to rub his forehead with two fingers.

“Picard, let me show you something,” He snapped his fingers and began to glow, much like Picard did when he arrived, but without a sound. After it was done, there was a thick mist around him.

“This is how I look like here.” The mist faded away

“Q, what ARE you?”

It was, indeed a strange creature, Picard would have expected one of those Pegasus-unicorn hybrids of the door. Instead, it was the strangest thing he ever saw. It was a combination of many body parts from different creatures. His head was horse-like, with a deer antler on the right, a goat horn on the left, one long fang, different-sized pupils, a snake tongue, and a beard. He had the right arm of a lion, the left claw of an eagle, the right leg of a lizard, and the left leg of a goat. In addition, he had a bat's right wing, a Pegasus' left wing, and a snake's tail.

It was the living description of chaos

“Beautiful, isn’t it? They call me Discord, the God of chaos around here; I ruled this place for 3000 years before Celestia and Luna overthrew me.” He scratched the back of his head. “Well, overthrew isn’t exactly the correct term, as I decided to lose. After all, I felt my little ponies deserved freedom after keeping me entertained for so long. I even came back a while ago to see how they were doing, let them defeat me again, but it was worth it”

Picard was still at the same spot, he didn’t know what to say.

“Q?”

“Yes?”

“Please tell me you are joking.”

“I am not! I think it’s the first time I tell you the truth right away actually…”

Picard face-hoofed. A small amount of dirt was left on his forehead, as he remembered that he walked on all four limbs now.

“It’s hard to let go an old habit, isn’t it?”

“You know the Enterprise will come looking for me. What are you going to do about that?”

He scratched his chin.

“I haven’t actually thought of that, if they insist, I think I will just bring them along.”

“Don’t you dare do that Q?”

“Is that a challenge?”

He sighed.

“Fine, what do I have to do to go back to the Enterprise? Dance?”

“You will have to figure it out yourself!”

Q grinned sarcastically and disappeared in a bright flash.

“Q!”

Merde, ce maudit!!!

Then Picard proceeded with his walk, towards the exit of the forest. Behind him, a small white rabbit had a puzzled expression, and started running on the same direction, but making sure that he was not seen by the strange stallion.

Pinkie welcome

In the chaotic inflation theory, a variant of the cosmic inflation theory, the multiverse as a whole is stretching and will continue doing so forever, but some regions of space stop stretching and form distinct bubbles…

Twilight Sparkle was tired, very tired. This kind of reading was extremely difficult, even for her. One question, however, remained:

What does Pinkie want with this?

She started to climb the stairs to her bed; a nap could do wonders for a mind in need of fresh ideas. It was one of the first things she had learned from Celestia.

“Twilight, are you going to bed already?”

She turned around, two emerald eyes stared at her with a confuse look.

“It’s only a nap Spike, I am sure you will survive without me for a few hours.”

“Ok, should I go see what Pinkie is up to?”

“No, leave her be. If you want, you can go to Rarity’s; I need you to take my scarf for her, it has a nasty rip on it.”

“Yes ma’am!” He said, a wide smile o his face as he went to take the scarf.

Cute.

“Bye Twi!”

“Bye Spike.” He closed the door and she resumed her walk to the bedroom.

_____________________________________________________________

The yellow Pegasus was watering the plants in front of her cottage. Though small, the house had a very pleasant feeling to it.

The white rabbit came from a bush behind the Pegasus, very tired of the running.

“Oh, hello Angel. Why do you look so tired?”

The rabbit started to make several quick motions on thin air.

“Somepony is in the forest? Is he lost?”

He nodded and resumed his motions.

“He was with somepony else?”

A negative motion.

“Someone else? Is it a dangerous creature or what?”

Angel looked around for a way to describe the draconequus. There was a bat and a hawk having their breakfast nearby. He walked towards them.

“Squeak! Squeak squeakqueak?”

Appearing to understand their comrade’s worry, they all agreed. Angel came back with the bat on his back, and the hawk by his side, when they arrived, the hawk got his claws in a way that it looked like Angel’s arms. Fluttershy frowned.

“But, that looks an awful lot like...meep!”

Discord!

The Pegasus took flight and went to the library

“I have to tell Twilight!”

Angel watched Fluttershy disappear on the horizon, with a look of accomplishment on his face.

   ___________________________________________________

Picard had finally arrived at his destination: a small clearing.

Okay, where should I go?

He looked around and found a small cottage about 200 meters from his location.

Good, I might be able to ask for directions.

He was in front of the door and knocked 3 times, a small white rabbit appeared.

“Hello, could you please tell me where the nearest town is?”I really hope rabbits are intelligent, or I will look like an idiot.

The bunny pointed down a small dirt road.

“Thanks. Have a nice day.”

He started to walk down the path and heard a whistle, which caused him to look back. The rabbit pointed two fingers at his eyes and then pointed them at Picard before closing the door.

Did that bunny just said that he is keeping an eye on me? Nah.

Then he proceeded down the road.

It was a calm walk, after two minutes he could already see a small village at the horizon, not more the a few minutes away.

Suddenly, something pink jumped on him.

“Hi! Who are you? Where are you from? Do you like parties?  Are you just passing or are you going to stay on Ponyville? Why are you dressed? Were you on a fancy party? Do you like cupcakes? Or maybe muffins? I like muffins and cupcakes! But I like my muffins with tea! Do you like tea?”

Picard didn’t know what to answer.

“Yes, I like tea.”

“Yay! Oh wait, how rude of me! I haven’t introduced myself! I am Pinkie Pie (but call me Pinkie), and I throw the best parties of Equestria! And who are you?”

He got up and rubbed the dirt of his uniform.

“My name is Jean-Luc Picard, but call me Picard.”

“Ohh, fancy! Say, are you from Prance?”

Should I say yes? Yes, it will be easier until I can explain.

“Yes, I am.”

“Okay, just be careful around Rarity. She will probably start to hit on you as soon as she knows you are from Prance. In her mind, you must be some kind of super-designer or model.”

Great, all that I needed, a pony version of  Lwaxana* .

“Thanks, I will try to remember that when she is around, what does she looks like?”

“You can’t miss here, perfect white unicorn with purple mane.”

There are unicorns around her? Well, shouldn’t have been a surprise, after all, there was a unicorn-like thing o the door I came through.

“Say, Pinkie, in this Ponyville, is there some kind of library or public archive that I could use to do some research?”

“Yes there is! Let me show you the way!” And she proceeded towards Ponyville, hopping.

I REALLY hope she is the only one like that.

And he proceeded, following her.

   ____________________________________________________________

“Twilight!”

“Five more minutes mom!”

“Oh! Ok. I’m sorry to bother…”

Wait, mom never apologizes. And that voice…

“Fluttershy? What? Why are you here? Do you need anything?”

“Twilight! Sorry to wake you up, but I had to tell you as soon as possible!”

“Tell me what? Did something happen?”

“I don’t know. You see, I was watering my plants when Angel arrives and tells me that he saw a pony and a creature talking on the forest. I asked what kind of creature and he grabs a bat and a hawk, gets the bat on his back, the hawk’s claws on his hands and shows me. And there is only one animal that I know that looks like that description…”

“Discord!!!”

“Yes, that is what I was afraid it was…”

“Spike! Take a…” She remembered that her assistant was at the Carrousel Boutique.

“Damn! Never mind!” She pulled a scroll and a quill and started to write.

Dear Princess Celestia

It is with great concern that I must inform your highness of the possibility of the return of Discord.

Although I first thought it was just some odd creature, I have been informed that he was talking with an unidentified pony. Why or who this pony was remains to be seen.

I must ask that your Highness send me the Elements of Harmony. It may all be a misunderstanding, but better safe than sorry.

Your faithful student,

Twilight Sparkle.

“There! Fluttershy, would you be a dear and deliver this to Spike? He is at Rarity’s. Tell him it is to be sent immediately!”

“I will! Bye Twilight, and be careful. You never know where Discord might be or what he might be up to... ”

“Don’t worry. Now go!”

The yellow pegasus flew through the windows, towards the boutique.

“I just hope we are wrong…”

       __________________________________________________________________

“…I’m telling you Picard! The poor hamster smelled like elderberries! If it wasn’t for Fluttershy, the poor thing might have died!”

“Pinkie, I think I lost you after the quantum gravity part.”

“Sorry, it’s just that sometimes I get carried away. We are here!”

Picard looked forward, it was a tree. But somehow it was also a house.

Well, someone took the concept of tree house to a whole new level.

They knocked on the door.

The arrival

Twilight heard the knocks and went downstairs. She opened the door.

“Hi Twi!”

“Hi Pinkie, who is that?” She said, looking at the bald stallion right next to her friend.

“Oh, this is Jean-Luc Picard! But he prefers to be called Picard! I found him just outside Ponyville, and he asked to do some research, is it okay that I brought him here?”

“Of course it is okay! Come in.”

The two ponies got inside, and Picard was amazed at the sight.

A library inside a tree. Now that is something you don’t see every day…

“So, Picard, what are you looking for?”

“I would like to see a history book. The most complete possible.”

“Um, I think I have just the thing.” She turned around and looked up a bookshelf, the she started to float a big red book down.

Telekinesis! Only a handful of species have this ability on my universe. I wonder if it is a natural ability to all unicorns or only a few posses it…

“Here! This should have everything you need.”

‘The Royal principality of Equestria: The complete history guide’. Well, this should do.

“Thank you. Is there somewhere I can start to read this?”

“Yes! You can use the studies tab-“

There was a strange creature where the studies table should have been, it had a body shape similar to spike, but much bigger. He was reading a book called ‘The Q and the Pinkie’.

“Q!” Picard shouted.

“You know that ‘thing’???” Twilight asked. An expression of shock in her face.

“Oh, hi! Who are you?  What are you? Do you like parties?” Pinkie asked, seeming to not mind the fact that the creature had appeared from thin air.

“Why, yes! I do like parties!”  Q answered.

“Yay! Than let’s have one! It will have cake, and punch, and muffins, and those small fruits on sticks that I have been working on and…” she kept going, now hopping around Q.

“Q, just tell me what I have to do to get back to the enterprise!”

“Oh! By the Q continuum! I’ve forgotten completely about the Enterprise! They are about to find out that you are gone.” He snapped his fingers and materialized a small cuckoo clock. “They are about to go to day shift.”He turned his head to Twilight. “Sorry I can’t stay anymore Twilight; tell Celestia I want my statue polished.” He snapped his finger again and disappeared in a white flash of light.

There were about 30 seconds of silence, where the only sound on the library was that of Pinkie’s hooves hitting the ground.

“What. Was. That???”

“Twilight, you have just met Q. According to him, he is called Discord here.”

“WHAT? HE WAS DISCORD?”

“Yes, he is not from this universe, he is a member from a god-like race, whose only purpose is to cause havoc and chaos, even though they call themselves the ‘guardians of the universe’.”

Twilight was in shock.

“Picard, have a seat. We have an awful lot to talk.”

         ________________________________________________________

7:59:32, 7:59:33, 7:59:34…

Data was sitting at the Capitan’s chair, it was his duty to be on the bridge at the night ship, and being an android that doesn’t require sleep proved very helpful towards that duty.

“8:00 Am, starting morning shift.”  The soft female voice from the Enterprise computer announced.

“Ensign Noble, you can leave your station now, Ensign Smith will be here at any second to replace you.”

“Ok sir.” The woman got up and walked toward the turbo lift, softly yawning during the course.

Ensign Smith should be here in 3 minutes, Commander Riker, Lieutenant Worf and Captain Picard in 5.The android thought while making the calculations on the remaining time to arrive at Outpost 42.

As he predicted, Ensign Smith arrived 3 minutes later. However, only Commander Riker and Lieutenant Worf came through the turbolift’s doors 2 minutes later.

Strange. Data thought. The captain usually comes to the bridge along with the senior staff.

“Commander Riker, may I ask why isn’t the captain with you and Lieutenant Worf?”

“I don’t know, I assumed he would already be on the bridge.”

“It is not likely of Captain Picard to be late.” Worf added.

“Computer. Locate Captain Picard.”

“Captain Picard is not aboard the Enterprise.” A look of shock and curiosity was stamped on the faces of the three officers.

“Red alert!” Riker said, the lights of the bridge took a reddish tone and a siren started to play. “Data. Run a wide sensor sweep and bring the ship to a full stop.”

There was a white flash of light. “You don’t need to.”

“Q!” Riker said with a small tone of anger on his voice. “I should have known it was you. Mysterious disappearances have your name written all over them.”

“Calm down Riker, I am here to take you to Picard.”

“Why do I think there is a ‘but’ somewhere on the next sentence…” Said the Klingon, now at his station.

“Very clever of you Worf, have you been eating some good books lately?” Q said, sarcastically, which cause Worf to growl a little. “Yes, there is a ‘but’. Picard is in other universe, you being humans and inferior, will have to be ‘changed’ to survive there.”

“What do you mean by ‘changed’?” Riker asked.

“You will see. I will also change Data, not that he needs to, but it will be better if everyone is equally changed.”

There was a bright flash of light as Q disappeared and the Enterprise started to shake.

“Data, status!”  Riker said.

“It appears we are going through a space anomaly, we should be clear of it in a few seconds.”

Indeed, a few seconds later, the star appeared again on the screen.

“Okay, start a sensor scan. I want to know where weAHHHHHHHH!!!” An excruciating pain started to pass through his body as he started to glow. Looking around he saw that everyone on the bridge was experiencing the same thing, only Data wasn’t feeling pain.

As the glow disappeared, he fainted.

   ____________________________________________________________

“Spike, could you bring the needles please?” Rarity said, without taking her eyes of the dress.

“Here!” He gave her the needles.

They were interrupted by a certain yellow pegausus.

“Spike! You have to send this to the Princess immediately!”

“What? Fluttershy, what are you…”

“No time! Send and go to the library, both of you!”

“Okay.” He blew a small green flame at the scroll.

“Okay Fluttershy. Just what is so important?” Rarity asked with a look of concern on her face.

“Discord might be back, you two go to the library,  I will go call Applejack and Rainbow Dash.”

“Oh my goodness! Let’s go at once! Spike?” She lowered herself a little to allow the baby dragon to climb up. After he was on her back she started to make her way to the library, and Fluttershy to Sweet Apple Acres.

   __________________________________________________________________

“Okay! That’s the last one.” Applejack said as she started to pull the cart toward the barn. Until she saw a yellow pegasus flying towards her. Fluttershy stopped just a few inches from her.

“Fluttershy! What brings you here?”

“Bad news, unfortunately. I am afraid Discord might be on the loose.”

“What? Discord? Did you tell Twilight?”

“Yes! I am looking for the rest of the girls now. I’ve already got Rarity. Do you know where Rainbow is?”

“At this time?  Try looking at that cloud.” She pointed at a small cloud, in the middle of the apple orchard.  “She is probably taking a nap there. I will be on my way to the library. See you there!”

And they went on their respective directions.

New civilizations

Riker started to come back to himself. He felt different and had a back pain, a voice was calling him.

“Commander?” It was Data.

“Data what…” He opened his eyes and saw a pony in front of him, his eyes were yellow and his skin was an unnatural shade of white, his mane was a perfect black. This pony was Data. “What are you?”

“It appears that the crew of the Enterprise was transformed into equines, most notably ponies and, in your case Commander, pegasus.”

Riker immediately looked to his back. Two wings were there, one on each side. They had brown feathers and popped through openings on each side of his uniform, which had also changed to fit his new body.

“Data, I am kind of afraid to ask but, what do I look like?”

“Well sir, your coat has an earth-brown coloration and your mane is pitch black. You have two wings which appear to be able to create enough lift to fly on their own and your uniform appears to have been altered to fit your new body.”

Riker was about to say something when they heard a growl from behind the security console.

“Worf! Are you all right?” Riker said, as he and Data walked towards the console. While Data didn’t seem to have a problem walking on four legs, it took Riker a few seconds to resist the urge to get up.

The Klingon officer wasn’t a pony. He was larger than both Riker and Data. His hair had changed, it was now a stripped Mohawk, but his beard was still the same. His body had black and white stripes as his hair. Worf was a zebra.

“Worf, are you all right?” Data asked.

“Yes, but my head hurts.” He took his front right hoof and rubbed the side of his head. Worf noticed the lack of fingers and took the hoof to his face. “What is the meaning of this?!?!?” He looked and saw that Data and Riker were ponies too, but Riker had wings.

“Worf! You are a zebra!” Said Riker, with a wide grin on his face.

“Fascinating. It appears that the fact that Worf is a Klingon has changed the outcome of the transformation.”Data said, in his calm and scientific tone.

“C’mon Worf. I am sure you will handle this.” The Commander said, with a smile.

“Ten Forward to bridge.”

“Bridge here. Commander Riker, speak up Guinan.”

“Why am I a horse with wings and a horn?”

“Q’s fault. We are in a parallel universe; Q mutated us in order to let us survive.”

“I should have know, could you make a ship-wide announcement? It will be much faster than me having to tell everyone that comes here what happened.”

“You are right, bridge out.”

Riker went to the captains sear, he realized that it wouldn’t be very comfortable to sit, as his body now had a completely shape. Perhaps I could talk to Geordi about a modification. He thought as he sat next to the chair and pressed a button on the side panel.

“This is Commander Riker. Q has kidnapped the captain and allowed us to come looking for him. We are now on a parallel universe and our bodies have been altered to survive on the new environment. I know it will be hard to adapt to our new bodies, but I am counting with everyone’s cooperation. Riker out.”

“Sir.” Data called. “I did a ship wide scan and detected all the mutations, it appears that all humanoids aboard the ship have mutated, but animals like cats and dogs are unaffected. There are five types of equines: Normal, pegasus, unicorn, zebra and alicorn.”

“Unicorns? And what the hell is an alicorn?”

“Yes sir, unicorns. And I took the allicorn name from the ship’s library; it is an equine with wings and a horn. There is only one aboard: Guinan.”

“This is outrageous!” Worf shouted. “I am NOT a striped horse!”

“Sickbay to bridge.”

“Bridge here.”

“I would like to run a small medical check up on the crew. I am curious about the new biology. The data I can gather would be invaluable to both veterinarian and humanoid medicine.”

“Ok Beverly, just out of curiosity: what do you look like?”

“Well, I am blue, my hair is still dark blonde, and I have a horn in the middle of my forehead. According to the tricorder, my brain can now channel psionic energy through it. But further studies are required to determine if I can now use telekinesis.”

“Ok. Riker out. Data, where are we?”

“According to sensors, we are in orbit of a Class M planet. I can’t scan for life forms however, as the precision sensor array overloaded during the passage through the space anomaly. Strangely, it’s rotation seems to be slowing down at a very high rate, it will stop completely in about 12 hours.”

“Don’t worry about that.” It was Q’s voice.

“Q, where…” Riker stopped when he saw Q. He had never seen this kind of animal before. It looked like the result of one of Arik Soong * failed genetics experiments that he saw on the star fleet history class. A perfect body for the chaotic Q. “What are you?” He asked, calmly.

“This is what I look like here! I didn’t need to change but I thought it would be nice of me to show you.” He appeared next to Worf. “Worf my boy! Looking good, huh? I am sure all the mares will want a piece…” He said sarcastically, Worf growled, visibly anger. “Now, I am going to give you a hint, Picard is somewhere in this part of the planet.” The screen zoomed in a small area of the planet, close to a forest and with a few mountains by the west. “Good luck!” He disappeared.

“Commander, I am detecting the presence of a small village at the coordinates, how shall we proceed?” Data asked.

“Data, Worf. Get Doctor Crusher and beam down to the planet. Check if there are any zebras too, we don’t want to cause havoc with an alien. We may be in another universe, but the prime directive still applies.”

The two officers nodded and exited the bridge through the turbolift, heading to transporter room 1.

“Riker to engineering.”

“Engineering. Geordi here.”

“Geordi, could you modify the chairs of the enterprise to our new bodies?”

“I suppose so, why?”

“I feel silly having to sit on the ground all the time.”

“Ok, I’ll be on it. Geordi out.”

      ________________________________________________________

Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Twilight Sparkle , Jean-Luc Picard and Spike were at the table, and they all looked at Picard.

“So.” Twilight started “You said Discord’s name isn’t Discord?”

“Yes. His real name is Q.”

“Q? What kind of name is that?” Said Rainbow. Applejack hit her.

“Ouch! What?”

“Be quiet, let the pony speak.” She said.

“Okay, So Discord a.k.a. Q brought you from another universe, why?” Twilight asked.

“Q finds mankind (My original species) to be fascinating, and for some reason beyond my imagination, he seems to like to put me through his ideas of a ‘joke’.”

“Wait a second there partner!” Applejack said, getting closer to him. “What do you mean by your ‘original species’?”

“I am not a pony, I am a human.”

Rarity raised an eyebrow. “Then why do you look like a pony?”

“Q changed me so I could survive in this universe.”

“What do you have to do to go back?” Twilight asked.

“I don’t know. I wish Q would tell me.”

A bright flash of light; Q appeared in its Draconequus form. Picard face hoofed once again, this time there was no residual dirt left on his forehead.

“Speaking of the devil…” Picard added.

“Oh! You were talking about me! Tell me Jean-Luc, what did you tell them? Was it about that time when I took you to meet the Borg?”

“Discord!” Rainbow Dash shouted “How did you break free?”

“I didn’t. I was never trapped for starters.”

“And what in ‘tarnation does that mean?” Applejack inquired.

“Applejack, my dear. If I wanted, I could erase this planet from existence. I simply allowed myself to be defeated because it would be more enjoyable.” He turned his attention to Picard. “Expect contact any moment now.” Then he vanished.

“What did he mean by ‘expect contact’?” Twilight asked.

“He probably brought the Enterprise, and they will start to look for me.”

“Enterprise?” Dash asked, with a frown.

“The starship which I am captain.”

“Wait! Starship?” Twilight seemed to have a glow on her eyes.

“Yes. My people have developed technology to travel through space faster than light. We discovered several alien species over the time, and now we all for an alliance known as the United Federation of Planets.”

Everyone’s mouths were hanging open. Except for Twilight, whose smile was so big that would make Pinkie Pie jealous.

“You-you can travel faster than light???” Rainbow Dash was amazed.

“Yes, the Enterprise’s top speed is roughly 2000 times faster than light.”

“Wait here!”  Twilight left the room and came back with a few papers and a quill. “Tell me everything!”

       ________________________________________________________

“This is boring. Ah don’t think ah want a ‘bird observer’ cutie mark.” Apple Bloom said, with a bored tone.

“Me neither.” Said Sweetie Belle.

“At least I can see Rainbow Dash with these binoculars.” Scootaloo said enthusiastically.

“Wait!” Sweetie Belle got her binoculars back on her face. “What is that?”

The two remaining crusaders got their binoculars on and looked where Sweetie was pointing. Out of thin air, an small blue light appeared, after 3 seconds, there were three ponies and a zebra there.

“Weird. I’ve never heard of a collective teleportation spell.” Sweetie said, scratching her head.

“Ah have seen Twilight teleporting a few times, and that wasn’t anything like that!”

“And why are they dressed? Are they going to a party or something?”  Scootaloo inquired.

The strangers talked for a while and started to head towards Ponyville.

“I know!” Sweetie Belle said “We could investigate!”

“Yeah!”

“CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS INVESTIGATORS YAY!!!”

Ass tattoos?

“There! It’s done!” Apple Bloom announced, showing her friends the drawing of a zebra. “Ah even painted his neckless-colar thingy!”

“All right! We should head to Zecora’s. She will probably know something about that stallion.” Scootaloo announced.

“Okay. Let’s go!” Sweetie Belle said, taking the drawing and putting in her saddle bag.

Zecora’s hut was not very far, but it was still a long walk.

“So, what do you girls think those ponies are up to?” Scootaloo asked.

“No idea. But if we knew, we wouldn’t be investigating, would we?”

“You are right Sweetie. Now let’s go.”

       ___________________________________________________________

“This telekinesis ability is amazing!” Beverly said, floating the tricorder’s sensor over a few plant specimens at the side of the path.

“Indeed. It appears that the brain uses the horn to canalize the psionic energy and levitate matter. I wonder if it can also transform it.”

“Me too. It would be nice just to point this little baby at a wound and watch it close and heal in front of my eyes.” Beverly added.

“I still prefer my old form.” Worf said, visibly anger

“Worf, snap out of it. You are even stronger now then you were before. I bet you could break a tree in half only by bucking it.”

“My opinion remains.”

“I, for once, like my new form.” Said Chief O’Brien. “Reminds me of a pony I saw on my uncle’s farm when I was 10.”

“Really?” Beverly asked. “How much do you look like him?”

“Well, we both are spotted. White with grey, with a spot around the right eye. But I am much more handsome!”

“What does Keiko think about it?”

“She is curious why I look different from the others. Maybe it’s because I’m Irish.”

“Possibly. It is a known fact that certain human groups develop traits after a while living on the same place. For instance: the people that lived near the north pole such as Russians and Canadians have adapted in such way that they only start feeling cold when the temperature reaches close to 5 degrees Celsius, while most humans would start shaking at 10 degrees Celsius.” Data added.

“Look at this.” Said Beverly, pointing at the horizon. A small town with a medieval look was there.

“We should begin our search there. The Captain would certainly look for shelter.” Worf said, determined.

“You are right.” Said O’Brien. “Wait, what is that?” He pointed at a small gray dot on the sky that was coming at their direction quite fast. Worf grabbed his phaser and pointed at it.

“Wait. It’s only a pegasus.” Data pointed. It was indeed a gray pegasus. From what Data learned from observing the mutated crew, it was a female. She also had a blonde mane and… Bubbles on its flank.

“Did that pony that passed just have a tattoo on its ass?” O’Brien asked, incredulous.

“It didn’t look like a tattoo. Looked more… natural…” Beverly answered.

Data was staring at the horizon. He used to do that when lost in deep thoughts, he learned from humans that deactivating the sense of sight helped to focus. It didn’t matter that he was an android; he still liked to do so.

Data started to remove his pants.

“Data! What are…” Beverly stopped when she saw.

There was a mark on Data’s flank; an image of what appeared to be a microchip.

“As I suspected. It appears that every equine of this universe has a similar mark.” Data said, looking at his own mark.

“Really? Everyone?” O’Brien started to remove his pants.

“Don’t!” Beverly shouted.

“Why not?”

“I don’t need the mental image of your horse penis.”

O’Brien stared at her for a few seconds.

“Don’t you know anything about horses? You are supposed to be a doctor! Human doctor, but still, a doctor!” He proceeded to remove his pants.

“What Chief O’Brien is trying to say is that, when not engaged on sexual intercourse, the equine penis is kept hidden inside a sheet, thus making it downright invisible unless he is upside down.” Data said to the Doctor, who sighed in relief.

“Thank god! I REALLY don’t need that image.”

“How appropriate!” They all looked at O’Brien. On his flank there was the picture of a ship in a bottle. “What is your, Doctor?”

“Oh no, I am not taking my pants of in front of you all. And I don’t care that I am a pony now.”

“Can you resist the curiosity?”

It took only a few seconds to Beverly to break and remove her pants, not completely, but enough to see her mark.

“A scalpel? Well, it’s still a medical instrument, but I would prefer a laser one. What about you Worf?” The 3 ponies looked at the warrior.

“Fine.” He lowered his pants. It was very different from the other marks. It looked like it had been painted.”It’s a bat’leth!”

“It seems yours is much more ceremonial, as it appears to have been painted. Perhaps zebras of this planet are much like Klingons in terms of rituals and traditions.” Data said, analyzing Worf’s mark.

“We should get going. We are here to find the captain.” Worf pulled his pants back as the others and him continued their walk towards the town.

_________________________________________________

“What do you mean you can’t tell me how your ship works?” Twilight said, a sad expression on her face.

“It’s a protocol of my people called the Prime Directive. We are not supposed to share technology with underdeveloped cultures.”

“Hey! Who are you calling underdeveloped?” Rainbow Dash said, leaning closer to Picard.

“He is right, compared to them we are barely foals. But why can’t you help us develop?”

“We tried to help several cultures to develop on the past. I ended up causing war and death.”

“I think he is right.” Everyone in the room looked to Fluttershy, who until now was very quiet. “Do you girls remember when the Cutie Mark Crusaders tried to get the archer cutie mark? Sweetie Belle almost shoot Apple Bloom in the knee. They had been instructed on how to use the bow, but they are just foals. It takes time to master and understand a new tech.”

“Exactly, miss?”

“Fluttershy.” She answered, almost on a whisper.

“You are right.” Twilight sighed. “But can you at least tell me about your technology?”

“Well, we can bend space. It’s what makes it possible for us to travel faster than light. We can also create matter using a machine called replicator and travel great distances in a blink of an eye with our teleporters.”

“Wait, you use technology for teleporters?”

Picard frowned. The question didn’t make much sense. What does she mean?

“Yes, of course. Why?”

“Isn’t that dangerous? I mean, technology can fail. You could never materialize on the destination, or materialize inside something. Wouldn’t it be safer just to stick with the teleportation spells?”

“What do you mean ‘teleportation spells’?”

“I mean this using your magic instead of technology for teleportation, like this.”  Twilight closed her eyes and focused. Her horn started to glow and then her whole body. There was a sudden flash of light and Twilight was on the other side. Picard was amazed.

“Incredible! You can teleport without a transporter pad!”

“Yes. Every unicorn can, it just takes some practice. You people don’t have magic?”

“No, that is why we use technology.”

“Must have been hard to do things without magic.” Rarity said.

“Not exactly, we came around and dealt with problems using technology.”

“I see. Say, is that wonderful piece of jewelry on your chest also technology or is it merely aesthetic?”

The comm. Badge! I’ve completely forgot about it!

“It’s a communicator. I had completely forgotten about it.” He hit the badge with his hoof. “Picard to Enterprise.”

    __________________________________________________

“There!” Said the caramel colored unicorn with an strange looking apparatus on his eyes. “The chair should be big enough for a pony to sit now.”

“Thanks Geordi.” Riker sat on the chair. “Really comfy.”

“I did my best. I will be on engineering if you need me.” He headed to the turbo lift. When the doors opened, a unicorn came out and took place next to Riker.

“Counselor?”

“Yes. I became a unicorn! Should be obvious taking the fact that I already had psychic powers.” Said Troi. She had a very dark brown mane and her coat was a perfectly white, but in a shade much more natural than Data’s

“Looking good.”

“Thanks Will.”

“Picard to Enterprise.”

Riker immediately stood up.

“Riker here. Are you all right captain?”

“Yes, I’ve been here for about 3 hours. How long have the Enterprise been?”

“About one hour. Q mutated us, now we are all…”

“Ponies. Yes, I know, I am a pony too. I wonder what Worf looks like…”

“He is a zebra.”

“A zebra?”

“Yes. And he is not happy about that. I sent an away team close to your location. Data, Worf, Beverly and O’Brien should come by in a few minutes.”

“Tell them to look for me on the library. I will be waiting. Picard out.”

      _________________________________________________________

There were three knocks. The hut’s door opened and the zebra looked down at the three fillies.

“Apple Bloom and friends! What brings you here this weekend?”

“Hi Zecora! We need your help.”

“Yeah. We saw three ponies and a zebra teleport just outside the town a while ago.” Said the pegasus filly.

“A teleporting zebra?” Zecora raised an eyebrow.

“Yes. A stallion. Bigger than Big Mac! He had a belt thingy too! Here, take a look.” Sweetie Belle floated the piece o paper to Zecora.

She looked at the drawing. It wasn’t perfect but showed everything with the necessary detail for her to understand.

“He is wearing a warrior’s baldric. Almost all mans from my homeland wear this relic. It is a symbol from the past, when for land zebras fought to death.”

“You mean they are here to invade???” Apple Bloom said, scared. The three fillies hugged each other.

“No. Zebra warriors wear baldrics as a sign of honor all the time. Not only when about to attack.”

The fillies sighed.

“Thanks. Is there anything else we should know?” Asked Scootaloo.

“The warriors from my land are known to have a short temperament. Don’t bother him or else in trouble you could be.”

“Thanks Zecora. Bye!” Said Apple Bloom, as the fillies went back to the city.

Back to the Enterprise

“Riker to away team.”

“Away team here.” Worf answered.

“Captain Picard just contacted me; he is at the town’s library.”

“Understood. We will be heading there now. Worf out.”

The away team was already at the town. The saw the ponies going by and doing their regular routines.

“Peaceful.” O’Brien said.

“Quite.” Data added.

“Let’s get this over with.” Worf said, he looked around and saw an earth pony with brown mane, brown coat and an hourglass cutie mark. He grabbed him. “You! Where is this town’s library?”

“I-I-I…” The pony was visibly scared.

“WHERE?”

“Down the road! It’s the tree with a door and windows!!! Just don’t hurt me!!!”

Worf let the pony go and proceeded to the tree, the others followed. Data stopped beside the earth pony.

“Forgive my friend. The trip was long and he is quite stressed.” The brown pony nodded, and Data followed the other.

“You didn’t have to do that Worf, you scared the poor thing.” Beverly said, walking aside Worf.

“I just want to go back to my old body as fast as possible.”

The four equines were now in front of the tree. Data was intrigued by the fact that there was foliage, despiste the tree’s interior being hollow.

O’Brien knocked three times. The door opened to reveal a rainbow manned pegasus.

“Yeah?”

“Hi. My name is O’Brien and my friends and I are looking for someone named Picard.”

“Oh! Ok!” She got her head inside the building “PICARD! THERE ARE SOMEPONIES HERE WHO SAY THEY KNOW YOU!”

“New ponies?” A pink ball of fur appear in front of O’Brien, she looked at them and gasped soundly.

“Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!!! 5 new ponies on a single day? No, wait. 4 ponies and a ZEBRA??? This is the best day ever!! I am going to throw a party for all of you!!! I can go to Zecora’s and get some zebra delicacies! Make special cupcakes, tea, punch, muffins…”

“That is enough, thanks Pinkie” Said a lavender unicorn. Pushing the pink energy ball aside. “C’mon in. He is waiting for you all.” She looked at Worf. “A zebra. Zecora will like this.”

They were now inside the library, Beverly was immediately attracted to the baby dragon.

“How cute!” She said.

“Thanks.” He said, blushing slightly.

“It can talk! Amazing!” She started to scan the dragon with her tricorder.

“Oh my!” Worf looked at the source of the voice; the white unicorn’s eyes were glowing. “What is your name dear?”

“Worf.”

“Such strong name! Tell me, where did you get that wonderful baldric?”

“It was made at the forges of Kahless in Qo’noS. It’s a symbol of my honor and loyalty to my family.”

“Impressive!” Rarity said,  measuring Worf with her eyes.

“Oh my! Are you all right?” Fluttershy asked Data. “You look pale and…” She touched his forehead and panicked upon feeling that the skin was cold. “Oh Celestia! You are hypothermic!”

“I am not, I am actually…” Data was cut off by Fluttershy, who made him lay on the ground.

“Twilight! Get some blankets! He is freezing!” The pegasus turned her head back to the android. “Rub your chest with your hooves, your legs will take care of themselves. And let me help you.” She lay on the ground next to him and unfolded her right wing over him.

“I am not suffering from hypothermia. I am an android, I don’t have body heat.”

Fluttershy blinked a few times. “Android?”

“Yes. I am a robot.”

The yellow pegasus started to blush violently.

"Sorry..." She said in a whisper.

“Fluttershy, did you call?” Twilight looked at her friend, who was lying on the ground with her right wing unfolded on the pale pony. “Uh, what are you doing?”

Fluttershy’s blushed even more; she folded her wing back in place and hid herself behind Data.

“Your friend thought I had hypothermia and tried to warm me. But I am an android; my body does not produce heat.”

“Wait, you are an android?” Twilight asked, incredulous.

“Yes.”

“That is amazing! Could you tell me more about yourself?”

“Certainly. I…”

“Data!” Picard said “And Worf, Beverly and O’Brien!”

“Captain. It’s good to see you.” Worf said.

“Enterprise: 12 to beam up.” Picard said, and everyone present started to glow. After a few seconds, they were gone

Pinkie Tech (TM)

The 10 ponies, a zebra and a baby dragon appeared at the transporter pad. Picard looked at the caramel unicorn with the strange apparatus on his eyes.

“Geordi, give them a tour of the ship. Worf, Beverly and Data, meet me, Will and counselor Troi on the conference lounge.”

The five crewmembers of the Enterprise made their way to the lounge, leaving 6 ponies and a baby dragon alone with Geordi.

“Okay. Where do you guys want to...” He was interrupted by what sounded like a burp. They all looked at the baby dragon, which now had a letter on his hands. “That wasn’t there before.”

“Finally! An answer from the princess!” Twilight opened the scroll.

My dearest, most faithful student, Twilight.

I am truly sorry for the delay. But as soon as I got your letter, something incredible happened: Discord appeared.

And even more fantastic: we had a pleasant conversation!

Apparently, Discord is a creature from another universe called Q. He came to equestria only to have fun. Now that I think about it, it explains a lot of things, like the fact that during his reign of chaos, nopony was killed and he only did things for a laugh.

He also said he brought a friend of his and that, while we talk, he is already with you. I look forward to meeting Picard.

Your Princess and teacher,

Celestia

“Well, that explains the delay.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, where did that letter come from? It wasn’t beamed aboard with you.” Geordi asked

“Spike is magically connected to Princess Celestia. When she burns the letter; he burps it out his dragon fire.” Twilight explained to Geordi.

He raised an eyebrow. For him, it must have been some kind of psychic manipulation of matter. But he let it be.

“Okay. Where do you want to go first?”

“How ‘bout you explain what in tarnation is that thing on your face?” Applejack said, pointing at Geordi’s VISOR.

“It’s my VISOR, I need I to see.” He took it off, revealing two blank eyes. The ponies gasped in shock and Spike almost chocked on his own tongue. Fluttershy was the first one to react.

“Oh my Celestia! How did this happen?”

“I was born blind. I got my first VISOR when I was 5, but I still don’t see like everyone else.”

“I am assuming it works based on technology as everything else on your universe. How does it make it possible to you to see?” The purple unicorn asked, intrigued.

“Well…” He got he’s VISOR back on his face. “It captures light and other wavelengths of the electro-magnetic spectrum, turns it into an electric impulse and sends it to my brain.”

“A simple and elegant solution. And what is this machine that you used to bring us aboard?” Twilight said.

Before Geordi could answer, a pink pony shouted.

“Silly filly! Don’t you see that it is a teleporter?”

“How do you know that?” Twilight asked.

“I have one at home!”

The seven ponies present dropped their jaws, and Spike almost chocked on his own tongue, again.

“YOU WHAT?”

“It’s not this advanced though, so I mostly use it to make deliveries and to get the filling inside the cupcakes without having to cut them.”

Everyone on the room was still in a state of shock, until Twilight managed to ask the 1 million bits question.

“Pinkie, HOW in Celestia’s name did you build a teleporter?”

“Wasn’t that hard to get the memory crystals to record the molecular pattern, and was easy to find gold enough to do the wiring. The hard part was building a molecular imaging scanner from scratch and an annular confinement beam to avoid signal degradation!” Pinkie happily said, as if such terms were the most common of words.

“Pinkie, how come you design and built a teleporter from scratch on a place that barely have computers?” Geordi asked. Twilight answered.

“Don’t even try to understand, you will lose your mind in the process. Say, is there somewhere we can go to have a glass of water? I am very thirsty.”

“Let’s go to the ten forward, I am sure Guinan will like to meet you all.”

  ___________________________________________

The three fillies where in front of the library.

“Twilight! Are you there?” Apple Bloom asked. No answer he three fillies went inside the library. There were a few books on a corner, a white rabbit in the middle of them.

“Angel? What are you doing here?” Sweetie Belle asked.

Angel immediately got himself in front of the three fillies and started to mimic.

“Ok, so, seven ponies?” Scootaloo said. He nodded and made a continue motion with his right pawn. “And a dragon? You mean the girls and Spike?” The rabbit gave the Pegasus a thumb up. “But who was the seventh pony?

The rabbit thought and made a square motion with his hand.

“A colt?” Apple Bloom said, Angel nodded his head. Then made a few more quick motions.

“Four more ponies came?” Sweetie Belle asked, Angel shook his head negatively and raised three fingers in one hand and one finger in another. “Three ponies and someone else? Was it a zebra stallion?”  Angel nodded.

“It must have been the same ponies we saw earlier!” Scootaloo said, with confidence on her voice. “What happened next?” Angel moved his mouth up and down. “They talked, then?”

Angel scratched his head. This next bit would be tricky to explain. He thought for a couple of seconds and an idea came to him. He grabbed an empty plate and headed outside.

“What is he up to?” Sweetie belle asked.

“Ah have no idea!” Apple Bloom answered. The rabbit came back with some dirt on the plate.

“What.” Scootaloo simply didn’t knew what this meant.

The white bunny removed some of the dirt and started to do some drawing, and then he showed to the crusaders, it was the drawing of a pony.

“Okay, ah still don’t get it.”

Angel started to make a buzzing sound with his mouth and shake the plate. When he stopped, there was no more pony.

“YOU MEAN THEY DISSAPEARDED?”

Before Angel could try to say his opinion, a slap sound was heard, the fillies and bunny looked to Apple Bloom, who had her hoof on her forehead.

“I am so dumb! I must be the dumbest mare in all of Equestria! How could I’ve not seen?”

“What are you talking about Apple Bloom?”

“Come with me! Angel?” She lowered herself, and the white rabbit climbed on her back. They were now heading to Sugarcube Corner.

The alicorn bartender

“If you don’t mind me asking: why do you people wear clothes? Isn’t that kind of formal?” Twilight asked. The mares and baby dragon were inside a turbo lift, Geordi accompanying them.

“Well, although it is not very useful in ponies, humans have to wear clothes to have privacy.”

“What do you mean ‘privacy’?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well, did you ever see a human before?”

“Does it walk on two legs; have two arms, hands with 5 claws and no horn or wings?”

“Yes! Where…”

“Discord appeared like that.”

“I see. The point is, our reproductive system is in between the legs, without clothes…”

“Oh! I see…” Twilight said, blushing a little.

“Here we are: Ten Forward.” Geordi announced. The guests gasped. There was a window going through all the extension of the room, it showed space and equestria.

“Holy mother of Celestia! How high are we?” Rainbow Dash was the first to ask.

“About 35.000 kilometers up. We are in geostationary orbit, which means we are always hovering the same spot.”

“Thirty five thousand…” The cyan Pegasus was amazed.

“So, what do you want to eat or drink?”

“Water.” Twilight said.

“Apple cider.” Applejack said.

“Sparkly water with a slice of lime, please?” Rarity asked.

“Nothing, thanks.” Fluttershy said in a whisper.

“Blueberry juice!” Pinkie said.

“Do you guys have gems?” Spike asked.

“Gems?”

“Dragons eat gems, but I don’t think they have spare diamonds and rubies lying around Spike.” Twilight said.

“Well, I can replicate some, but it won’t be the same.”Geordi said, spike nodded in agreement.

“Wait, replicate?”

“Yes, it’s like the teleporter, but it uses a pattern pre-recorded on the computer to create matter. And you?” Geordi looked at the cyan Pegasus.

“Whiskey.” They all looked to Rainbow. “What? Applejack asked for cider!”

“Yeah, but cider ain’t strong enough to start a fire!”

“Fine! Give me a beer.”

“Guinan, you heard them.” Geordi said.

Although 6 guests were still looking at the planet bellow, Twilight felt that she had to look at the bar. What she saw made her entire universe stop.

Oh my Celstia! An alicorn!!!

Twilight’s thoughts started to rush, a part of her mind told her to kneel before he dark brown being. Another told her to scream, and an third one told her to faint. Instead, she just stood dumbstruck.

“Here.” Guinan said. “Water, sparkly water, apple cider, earth Lager beer, a few diamonds, rubies and other gemstones and a blueberry juice.”

The others turned to the direction of the voice and founded themselves just as paralyzed as Twilight.

“Is something wrong?” Geordi asked.

“Sh-she is an alicorn!!!” Twilight said, almost screaming.

“Indeed I am. I take that they aren’t very common, are they?” The dark brown alicorn said, with a calm smile.

“Well, there are only two alicorns on existence, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. And they are responsible for raising the sun and moon, or should I say, maintaining our planet rotation.”

“Wait, you mean there are two begins who, alone, keep an entire planet from stopping?” Geordi asked, shocked.

“Yes. Now, there are three. I wonder if the princesses will like the company of another alicorn. Spike, take a… Oh wait.”

“Is there something wrong?” Guinan asked,

“I didn’t bring scroll or quill. You mentioned ‘replicating” gemstones, can you do the same with scrolls and quill?”

“I can replicate a quill, but I think there is no pattern for a scroll. Computer, A piece of paper and a quill.” The small opening o n the wall started to glow, and after a few seconds a quill, ink and a piece of paper stood there.

“Thanks.” Twilight floated the paper and quill, dripped it in the ink, and stated to write.

Dear Princess Celestia

I’ve just found the most incredible thing.

You see, Picard isn’t a pony at all; he is from a species called human. Let me explain.

As you are already know, Discord’s real name is Q and he has unlimited power. The humans are much more advanced than us, but lack magic. They explore the space in huge starships, like the one that is orbiting our planet now (Find a telescope, it’s huge.)”

Q have been teasing and playing around with humans for a while and Picard is his favorite human.

He now threw him here, and turned him into a pony. But that is not why I am writing o you.

Remember that humans have starships? Well, when the crew from the ship which Picard is captain found out that he was gone, Discord brought them here, and all of them were turned into ponies.

Now, the most incredible thing is: one of them was turned into an alicorn

I am sure you will like to meet her. Just come here.

Your faithful student.

Twilight Sparkle.

“Spike: send it.”

The dragon burned the letter, and the smoke disappeared in thin air.

“She should get here any moment now.” Twilight said.

“Wait, what do you means ‘she we’ll be here’? How?”Geordi asked.

“Teleportation is one of the mostly know of the advanced tier arcane arts. Every unicorn can execute it with enough training.”

“Are you saying that unicorns can perform teleportation without any kind of device?”

“Yes.”

“That’s amazing! You should really go see doctor Beverly, she been transformed into a unicorn a can barely contain herself of the possibilities that the horn opened.”

“Sure, me and Rarity will go see her, where is she?”

“She’s…” Geordi trailed of, as he started to look at a seemly random spot. “Well I’ll be dammed!”

“What? Why are you looking at nowhere…” Twilight was cut off by a bright flash of light, which revealed both princesses standing at the spot that the caramel unicorn was looking “Princess Celestia! Princess Luna!” All the seven guests knelt before the presence of the two Princess. The other few ponies present were dumb folded at the two alicorns that had just appeared out of thin air, and Guinan was simply smiling at the whole scene.

“Wow!” Geordi said, with an amazed expression. “You two opened a wormhole! That’s no easy feat!”

“Thou were starring at thee before our arrival, you knew ye would arrive?” Asked Luna.

“Well, this baby is much more than a pair of glasses, I saw the spike of graviton count there before the wormhole actually appeared.”

“Wormhole?” Celestia asked, curiously.

“Yes, you two just punched a hole in space. That takes an awful lot of power.”

“I guess you are here to see me?” The two princesses turned to the brown alicorn, and were amazed.

“The other alicorn! What doth thou name be?”

“Guinan.”

“Sister, I think it would be better for you to talk in more modern speech patterns.”

“Ok, it’s just that I forget sometimes.” Said Luna.

“Princess, I am glad you came so fast.” Twilight said. “If you want anything, ask Guinan and she will provide.”

“This is beautiful!” They looked a Luna, her eyes watering as she stared down at the planet below.

“Indeed, we must be at somewhat 35 thousand kilometers high.” Said Celestia, standing beside her younger sister. “Miss Guinan, Twilight said you are the only alicorn aboard, any idea of why?”

“For starters, I was not human.”

“Oh, but wasn’t this a human vessel?” Rarity asked before Twilight or Celestia could do so.

“No, this is a Starfleet vessel, any species that is linked to the federation can join. Worf for example, is, or was, a Klingon.”

“Then, your species is the cause of your transformation into an alicorn? If I may ask, what species were you?” Twilight asked.

“I am El-Aurian. We were a race of listeners.”

“Were?” Luna asked, confused.

“There is a great evil in our galaxy called Borg. The spread like wildfire and consume civilizations like a hungry swarm. They scattered my people across the galaxy.”

“That is horrible!” Said Celestia.

“Yes, but we are getting over it. I even got myself a bar to take care of. For a race of listeners, taking care of a bar is the Holy Grail. I can listen to people and they can take the weight of their backs.”

Before the conversation could go any further, three exited fillies got in the middle of the bar, two of them hugging two mares

“Apple Bloom?” Apple jack said, dumb folded.

“Sweetie?” Rarity was shocked.

“Squirt? What are you girls doing her? HOW did you girls get here?” Rainbow said to Scootaloo, puzzled by the crusaders presence.

“We used Pinkie’s teleporter to…”

“YOU WHAT???” Pinkie said before Apple Bloom could finish “ARE YOU ALL INSANE? That thing was never made to teleport anything living, much less to this far!!! How come you are even alive???”

“Well…” Sweetie Belle said, scared because she had never seen Pinkie angry before. “A nice colt said that he got our ‘beam’ or something and was able to ‘materialize’ us.”

“YOU SHOULD BE GLAD! You all owe him your lives! If he didn’t help you would all be scattered in atoms.”

“We’re sorry.” The three crusaders said, in shame.

“It’s not with me you should apologize; do you know what it would mean to lose you guys to your sisters and parents? Without even remains to bury at the grave? An empty coffin ceremony?”

The three fillies were even more scared of this; they didn’t think of that when they came up with the plan.

“Apologize to them.” Pinkie was much more serious than she ever had been. Her stare was so frightening that could only be met by Fluttershy’s stare.

“Ah am sorry sis’”

“Yeah, sorry sis.”

“Sorry Rainbow.” Scootaloo didn’t have a parent or sister present, but apologized to Rainbow, as she had looked so worried.

“Its okay hun’, but what were yer’ all thinking?”

“We saw the three ponies and zebra appear outside of Ponyville, and decided to investigate. We talked to Zecora and she said that the zebra was a warrior, and that zebra warriors were known for being tough and strong.”

“Interesting…” Rarity said, all the ponies present shot a glare at her and she blushed lightly. “Sorry, go on Sweetie.”

“So we thought that they may have been here to invade, but Zecora told us that zebra warriors never go to start a war alone, so we went to the library to tell twilight.”

“But I wasn’t there, were I?’ The lavender unicorn said.

“No, instead the place was empty, except for Angel.”

“Angel? What was he doing? Is he all right?” Fluttershy said, worried.

“Yes, but he saw you being teleported and panicked. So Apple Bloom remembered that Pinkie had a teleporter, we went there and had Angel use your target localizer thingy at the library, and then we appeared her.”

“Well, that was interesting.”

Suddenly, the lights dimmed to a yellowish tone.

“Picard to Geordi, we’ve detected something on the long range sensors. Come to the bridge.”

“Aye sir. Geordi out.” He tapped his comm. Badge with his hoof. “Wait here.”

“No.” Rainbow said. “If something is about to attack Equestria, I want to know what.”

“I bet you all want to come, huh?” All the guests nodded in agreement. “Goerdi to the Captain, the six ponies you brought aboard and the two rulers of the planet bellow want to examine the situation, should I let them come with me?”

“Two rulers? When did they get aboard and how come I don’t know about it?"

“They teleported themselfes.”

“What? How?”

“No idea, but I think they will tell if you ask them.”

“Ok , bring them. Picard out.”

“Okay. Now, I don’t mean to insult, but the turbolift isn’t big enough to all of you.”

“No problem. We can focus on Twilight location an teleport to were she is.” Celestia said.

“Ok, what about the kids, I can’t let them on the bridge.” The crusaders sighed.

“Leave them with me. I am good with children” Guinan said, leaving the bartend and stopping beside the three fillies.

“Are you sure?” Rarity asked, worried about the alicorn’s sanity.

“Yes. I am the mother of a lot of kids; taking care of only three at a time will be easy.” She said, with an honest smile.

“Okay, good luck Guinan. Twilight and friends, follow me.” Geordi said, walking towards the door.

Rarity's muSHa'

Rarity's muSHa'

The six ponies, two alicorns and baby dragon were now on the Enterprise’s bridge.

“So, you are the two rulers? Captain Jean-Luc Picard, it’s an honor to have you two aboard your majesties. “

“The honor is ours.” Celestia answered.

“The probe is there captain.” The pegasus ensign said.

“Show us the object.”

The screen lit up. It showed what appeared to be a nebula, but with a big difference: it moved, much like an octopus would.

“According to the probe’s sensors, it has a 30000 kilometers radius, has an outer shell made of a silicon-iron alloy and is heading towards this location. It will be here in two days.” Data said, reading the probe’s telemetry at his console.

“Damn, put the probe in orbit of it; make sure that it keeps sending telemetry.” Riker said.

“Aye sir.”

“We should gather the elements sister.”Luna said.

“What do you mean? What elements?” Picard asked with a raised eyebrow.

“The elements of harmony are the most powerful thing on our planet, we are the six holders.” Said Twilight, pointing her hoof at her friends.”It combines our magic in such way that it produces a powerful arcane aura that can vaporize any chaos or disharmony.”

Picard, Riker and Worf didn’t understand that description.

“Captain, I believe that what Twilight is describing is a Psionic generator. In theory, such device could kill or alter any form of life.”

“Is it going to work on that thing?” Worf asked.

“In theory, yes. But I have to run more tests to be sure.” Data said, returning to his console.

“We should return to Canterlot sister. We didn’t warn the guards before we left, they are probably about to start a war with every single kingdom around Equestria under the accusation of kidnap and murder.” Luna said.

“You are right Luna. Twilight, I will take you and your friends back to Ponyville. You all have to prepare to bear the elements again.”

“What about the crusaders? I don’t think they will be well here.” The lavender unicorn said.

“I trust Guinan; she will be able to handle them for a while. Now, all of you, gather around.” The six ponies and dragon made a small circle around the sun’s Princess.

“Your highnesses, I wish to have a look on these elements, to confirm that they will be able to fight of the threat.” Data said, a tricorder in his belt.

“Come with me, I will take you to Canterlot. There you will have a look on the elements." The night Princess said to the android.

“Princess Celestia, I wish to stay here a little longer.”  All of them looked to Rarity.

“Why is that?”

“I want to look after Sweetie Belle. Also, Geordi mentioned that a certain doctor is looking to study the unicorns abilities and I wish to help.” She didn’t lie, but didn’t tell all the truth either.

“Very well.” Rarity took a few steps and was out of the circle.

There was a bright flash of light and the princesses, ponies, android and baby dragon disappeared. Rarity then went into the turbolift.

“Ten Forward.” The lift started to move.

He looks so strong and closed to himself. How am I going to start a conversation with him? She thought as the turbolift made its way to the Ten Forward.

       ____________________________________________

The night princess and the android pony materialized in front of the vault that guarded the elements.

“Now, could you please wait…” She was cut off by a magically thrown spear that went through the pony’s foreleg.

“Oh my heavens! Are you allright? WHO GAVE THE ORDER TO THIS ACTION?” Luna screamed, two unicorn guards came out from behind a column.

“I am quite all right your highness.” Data removed the foreign object from his leg. “It didn’t hit any primary movement systems or data storage modules, all I need is a patch of silicon to repair my skin.”

“How come you are not bleeding? Or feeling pain?” One of the guards asked, his eyes wide in curiosity.

“DID I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO TALK?” Luna said in her royal Canterlot voice, making the guard shiver.

“I am an android; I don’t have blood or capability to fell pain.”

“Wait, you’re a robot?” Luna asked. She did notice the colt’s pale skin and unusual eyes, but had dismissed it as a trait of his original species.

“Yes.”

“Oh, that explains a few things.” She turned herself to the guards. “AS FOR YOU TWO:  BACK TO WORK, AND MAKE SURE THIS NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN!” The guards saluted and quickly removed themselves from the room.

“Okay, let’s get to business.” The blue alicorn got her horn inside an aperture in the door. As her horn glowed, the door did so, and it finally opened, revealing the chest that contained the elements. She landed the necklaces and tiara at the ground.

“Thanks your highness.” Data got his tricorder out of his belt and started to scan the elements.

     ________________________________________

There was a white flash, after which 5 ponies, one alicorn and one baby dragon appeared. A small rabbit was particularly happy about the presence of a certain Pegasus.

“Angel!” Fluttershy said, as she proceeded to hug her fluffy friend.

“I’ll be heading to Canterlot now my little ponies. Take care of your selves.” Celestia then disappeared in another white flash.

“And I am going to sleep, geez that made me tired!” Spike announced as he walked up the stairs into the bedroom.

“Girls, can ah talk to y’all for a second?”  The other four ponies gathered around Applejack. “Rarity lied.”

“What?” The four friends said in shock.

“Not exactly, I mean, she said the truth but not all of it. There is another reason for her to be on that fancy ship.”

“And what is it?” Twilight asked, with a curious look.

“Ah think she’s in love with that zebra stallion.”

“And what makes you said that?” Asked Twilight.

“Well, two things: I am the element of honesty, I can tell when someone is hiding the truth or lying.”

“And the other?” Rainbow asked.

“Having your brother as the town’s sex symbol kind of helps you to notice when someone falls in love with someone.” The country pony said, with a matter-of-fact one.

“I must say, I didn’t expect rarity to like the tough. I thought she would fall in love with one of those frou-frou colts that you find in fashion shows.” The cyan Pegasus said, a little amazed.

“I always knew. Rarity is by far the most perfect description of femininity I know. And that stallion is the perfect example of masculinity. It’s natural that she would fall in Love to her perfect opposite.” Everyone looked at Fluttershy. “I am kind of good in psychology.” She said, blushing.

“Well, do you girls know what this calls for? A PATRY!!!”

“Leave it for latter Pinkie, we have to prepare to use the elemens.” Twilight said, they had to think this through.

      ________________________________

When Rarity arrived at the Ten Forward, she noticed two things: The complete lack of chaos and destruction, and three fillies talking and giggling in a table.

“Darling, HOW did you accomplish this?” She asked Guinan, surprised.

“As I said, I am good with children. Bu they are not the reason you are here, are they?”

“No, I wanted to ask you some things about that Worf stallion.”

“You are in love with him, aren’t you?” Rarity gasped.

“How…?”

“I am a bartender; I don’t need telepathy to know when someone is in love.”

“Yes, it just that he is so… Manly!” The white unicorn said, with a blush on her face.

“I should warn you though, Klingon mating ritual is known for its toughness.”

“What do you mean?” She asked, with a curios look.

“I am not the most qualified person to describe, talk to Beverly. She will be able to make a more complete description of it. She is in sickbay”

“Ok, thanks or the help.”

“It was a pleasure.”

  ________________________________________

Data closed his tricorder, he had been scanning for almost an hour now.

“There, I have enough data to run a simulation on the effects.”

“Do you wish to return?” Luna asked.

“Yes.” There was a light involving him and the next moment he was at the Enterprise’s bridge.

“Data! How did it go? And why is your uniform punctured?” Riker asked.

“One of the royal guards mistook me for a threat and threw a spear at me, I will be all right.” He said while transferring the tricorder’s data to his console. There was a small bip. “Sir, it appears that there is another object in orbit of the Nebula.”

“Kraken.” Worf said.

“I am sorry?”

“We are calling it Kraken, old earth literature.” Geordi said from his console.

“Kraken, an old earth sailor’s tale. A gigantic octopus monster said to devour entire ships.”

“Can you get it on screen?” Riker asked. Data pressed a few buttons and the mysterious object appeared on the screen.

“It looks like a satellite from a pre-warp civilization. Data, try to download its telemetry.” The caramel unicorn said. The pale earth pony started to press his console.

“I looks like it’s transmitting a radio signal, should I patch it trough?”

“Do it.” The Pegasus commander said, pointing at the screen.

A humanoid figure appeared on the screen, it had some facial features that made him look like a bajoran, but his skin was gray.

“This is chief scientist T’not! There isn’t much time left, I am changing this satellites orbit so it will follow this MONSTER’S path, if you are hearing this, it can’t be harmed from the outside, my people tried. We launched every one of the 18 thounsand nuclear missiles on our possession, but it barely scratched its surface, only the 500 that went inside this beast’s mouth made it react, if only we knew. I hope this helps anyone whose planet is about to be attacked ….*static* This is chief…”

“It loops. It is an improvised warning buoy.” Data stated.

“At least we now know its weakness. Worf, can you modify the photon torpedoes to make them more powerful?”

“Yes, nothing a few tweaks and some extra anti-matter can’t solve.”

“Commander, we have a problem. According to my calculations, even with the Enterprise’s entire arsenal, we won’t be able to destroy the threat.” Data said.

“Damn. What about those Harmony things?”

“They may be able to help; I still have to run the simulation.”

“Good. Do it. I will inform the Captain.”

__________________________________

Rarity was now inside the ship’s medical bay. She didn’t know Dr. Beverly, so she had no idea what she looked like.

“Execuse me sir.” She said to a colt that was wearing a green suit. “Where can I find Dr Beverly?”

“She is in her office. You must be the mare that Guinan said was coming, am I right?”

“Yes.” Oh dear, I hope she didn’t tell him.

She went inside the mare’s office, and immediately noticed that she knew her.

“Hello, my name is Rarity, Guinan sent me.”

“Oh, hi! I saw you back on the library. Say, would you mind if I ran a few tests while you do a few simple tasks? I really want that data.”

“Okay.”

“Just sit here.” She  pointed to the chair were she was a few moments ago. Rarity did so.

“Okay…” Beverly stuck a few sensors at Rarity’s chest, head and one at her horn. “There, could you please levitate something?”

Rarity looked around; she saw a pad lying at the desk and levitated it.

“Good, good…”

“If you don’t mind, I need some information too…” The white unicorn said, a little embarrassed.

“What do you need?”

“Its, kind of personal…”

“Doctor-patient confidentiality.”

“Okay, here it goes…” Rarity took a deep breath. “I am in love with Worf.”

“Wait, what?” Beverly said, a little shocked.

“I know! It’s just that there is something about him that makes me just …melt!” She said with a blush on her face and a lost look on her eyes.

“Well, I am not the best person to talk about it. I am a doctor, not a counselor. Why did Guinan send you here?”

“Well, you see: I talked to her and…” She started to blush furiously.

“And…?”

“She said I should talk to you about Klingon mating rituals.” Rarity felt as Flutershy, hiding behind her own mane.

“Oh, I see. Wait here.” Beverly went outside her office and came back a few moments later. “Here, this should do.”

“What is it?”

“I’ve downloaded all available information on Klingon matting ritual there. It should have everything you need.”

She looked at the pad.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, start small. Here.” Beverly pointed at a paragraph, Rarity started reading.

When choosing a mate, it is traditional for a female Klingon to bite the male's face, allowing her to taste his blood and get his scent.

“But, I couldn’t! I shouldn’t! I can’t bring myself to hurt him!”

“You won’t hurt him. He will fall in love for it. Just try doing it when you two are alone, okay?”

“Okay…” Rarity felt as if all of her blood had been directed to her face. “I will try…” Oh dear, I just hope he likes…

The failsafe plan

“Sir, the simulation is done.” Data announced. “And we have a problem: the elements will not be able to fight it, not even with the help of the Enterprise.”

“Damn! Is there another way?” Riker asked, visibly angry.

“In theory, if we overload the warp core, it will create a singularity for a few seconds. It would be enough to destroy it. But the warp core would have to be inside the creature.”

“It will be our plan B. Go down to the planet and inform the princesses.”

“Aye sir.” Data made his way to the turbo lift and to the teleporter. Without anyone noticing, Worf had started a simulation of his own.

__________________________________________

“You’re back. How did it go?” Guinan asked rarity as she enterded the Ten Forward.

“I got this.” She showed her the pad.

“Should help.”

“Yes, but I need your help now.”

“Shoot it.” The brown alicorn said.

“I have to get me and Worf alone. I don’t want to embarrass him in front of other ponies, and I also feel I can’t do it with anyone else looking.”

“He usually comes here after his shift to drink a glass of prune juice. Should be about 10 minutes from now.”

“Okay but what about the…” She looked at the table where the crusaders were, it was empty. “Where are they?”

“They wanted to know more about the ship, so I sent them to the school.”

“Are you sure that it was a wise decision?” Rarity asked, again fearing for Guinan’s sanity.

“They will like the company. The will probably like Alexander too.”

“Alexander?

“Worf’s son.”

Rarity jaw’s dropped.

“Wait, WHAT? HOW COME NO ONE TELL ME HE’S MARRIED?”

“He isn’t.”Guinan stated. Rarity was confused.

“Care to explain? Please?”

“Worf was married to K'Ehleyr, a Klingon emissary that gave birth to Alexander. While she was supervising the empire’s succession ritual, she stumbled across a conspiracy and was killed.”

Rarity was shocked.

“She was murdered?”

“Yes. Worf avenged her by killing the man who killed her, Duras. He has been alone ever since.”

“Oh my. I-I think I should give up on him then…” Rarity said, with a tear on the corner of her eye.

“Why is that?”

“If I try to get him, I may open his emotional wound. I don’t want to hurt him…”

“Rarity dear…” Guinan placed her hoof on Rarity’s chin, turning her head in her direction. “Worf is a Klingon, he got over it the moment he killed Duras.  He is about to arrive. I will be back in a few minutes.”

Rarity was now alone on the bar; Worf would arrive any moment now. Her heart was racing.

It’s now or never!

        _________________________________________________

It had been three hours since the Enterprise had detected the threat, now named Kraken. Worf’s simulation was done, and he sighed.

I have to tell Data, I will need his help.

The Klingon warrior went through the doors of the Ten Forward, where he saw the unicorn mare. She was sitting at the bartend, drinking what appeared to be sparkly water. He sat next to her and noticed that Guinan was nowhere to be seen.

“Where is Guinan?”

“She had some business to attend to.” Rarity said, trying to hide the anxiety on her voice.

“I can wait.”

Okay Rarity, now or never! You can do it! It has to be quick! Oh my…

It all happened very fast, so Worf only became completely aware of what had happened after Rarity had disappeared, running away from the bartend. He took his hoof to his cheek and looked at it: a small dot of blood was there.

“Well, that went very well I would say…” Guinan said, coming trough the door on the opposite end to the Ten forward.

“Guinan! What happened? Why did she…” Worf was cut off by a brown hoof on his lips.

“She fell in love for you, and is trying to impress you by honoring Klingon matting traditions.”

It hit Worf like a d'k tahg blow. She had bitten his cheek, licked his blood and now had his scent. She wanted him.

“But I can’t! She is a horse!”

“So are you, for the matter.” Guinan stated. Worf sighed.

“It’s not only that! I may end up hurting her.”

“Worf, remember when I first introduced you to prune juice?”

“Yes.” He said.

“I asked why you were always alone, and why was that. You said that it was because human females were too fragile. Remember what I said next?”

“You said that there might be one or two women aboard that might be willing or wanted to try.” He said, a little uncomfortable.

“Exactly. Rarity not only wants to try, she wants to stay with you.”

“I still have to think this through.”

“Fair enough.”

        _________________________________________

The two princesses sat at their thrones, with the royal guards on each side. A pony started to materialize with a blue glow in front of them, causing the two white pegasi to go into battle stance.

“Hold it, he’s friendly.” Celestia said, the guards returned to their ordinary  guard stance as the pony stopped glowing.

“Your majesties, I am afraid I have bad news: The elements will not be able to fight the threat.”

“What? How so?” Luna asked, a little worried.

“The computer simulation showed that even with the elements full power, the creature would only be stunned for a few seconds. The only viable way we found of destroying it would be creating a singularity by overloading the Enterprise’s warp core.”

“I am sorry, but I didn’t quite catch that last bit. What is a singularity?” Celestia asked.

“Are you familiar with the cosmological mechanics your highness?”

“No, that’s Luna’s department.”

“A singularity is the same as a black hole.”  Data said.

“What?!?!? You are going to open a black hole this close to Equestria??? Are you insane?”  The dark alicorn said, a look of horror on her face.

“It will last only 7 seconds before it collapses. But will be enough to destroy the threat.”

“Is there another way?” Celestia said, concerned.

“Apparently, no. I will inform your highnesses on the progress.”

“Could you do a favor? Can you go to Ponyville and tell Twilight this.”

“I can.” Celestia touched the android’s forehead with her horn and the earth pony started to glow, there was a white flash and he was gone.

_________________________________________

Rarity had been walking for about ten minutes now. She ran away from the Ten Forward and  as she went inside of the turbo lift, she had shouted a random number. Now, her mind kept going back to those key 3 seconds when she bit Worf.

Did he like it? Did I scare him? Will he forgive me or avoid me?

“Are you all right miss?”

Rarity snapped out of her thoughts and looked to the source of the voice. It was a white unicorn, much like her, but with a dark-brown mane.

“I am fine, thanks.”

“No you are not. Do you want to talk about it? My name is Troi. I am the ships counselor and psychiatrist.”

Rarity sighed. Perhaps she can help me calm down.

“Okay.”

“Follow me.”

         ____________________________________________

Twilight saw a white flash of light coming from downstairs. She went down and saw Data standing in the middle of the library.

“Data! What brings you here?”

“Princess Celestia sent me to inform that the Elements of Harmony will not be able to fight of the threat.”

“What?” Twilight was shocked.

“The elements can only stun the creature, not defeat it. However, the Enterprise might be able to do so.”

“How?”

“We could create a black hole that would consume the creature, and collapse right after, but that would imply in most certainly destroying the Enterprise as well.”

“But, that would leave all of you stranded here.”

“As I said its only one plan. We are working on other possibilities.”

“Okay, thanks for the warning. Have a nice day.”

“You too. Enterprise: one to beam up.”

Bloodwine

“So, tell me dear, what is bothering you?” Troi said, levitating two cups of tea to the small table in between her and Rarity. “I can feel a lot of emotions coming from you: love, anxiety, fear and… lust?”

“How do you know what I am feeling?”

“I am a Betazoid, my species has natural telepath an empathy habillities. You are in love, aren’t you?”

“Well, yes. I am in love. Madly. I haven’t felt like this since my first crush! It’s insane.”

“May I know who the lucky man is?”

“Worf…” Rarity said, blushing.

“Oh, that makes sense. Explains your anxiety and fear.”

“I am afraid that he might reject me. I am doing everything by the book, you see.”

“What do you mean?”

Rarity floated the pad that she had been hiding on her mane.

“Um. ‘Klingon mating rituals’. I see.”

“I already did the cheek bite part, you know. I just hope he likes it…” Rarity’s face lit up for the nth time that day.

“You actually bit him? Dear, I would say you just won his heart.”

“Really?” Her eyes seamed to glow.

“Yes, Worf is very loyal to the traditions. I don’t think he would let you down.”

“Thank you!” Rarity said, hugging the mare. “It was all I wanted to hear!”

“No problem. Have a nice day.” Troi watched as Rarity left, humming a tune to herself with a large smile on her face.

       ____________________________________________

Data materialized at the transporter pad.

“Hi sir. How did it go?”

“It went fine Mr. O’Brien, thanks.”

As Data left the room, Worf came across.

“Data, I need o talk to you. But you have to maintain it a secret.”

“Okay Worf. What do you wish to discuss?”

The android and zebra started to talk and discuss the plans. Completely unknown to them, a certain orange Pegasus filly watched, hearing every detail from her hiding position on the Jefferies tube.

   ____________________________________________________

“Sister, what is a black hole?” Celestia asked, a little worried about Luna’s reaction.

“Tia, remember when I told you that was possible to make something so heavy that its gravity wouldn’t let not even the light escape?”

“Oh. How come they can make something like this?”

“I don’t know. But I hope they are right about it collapsing seven seconds later…”

   _______________________________________________________

Enterprise`s school ward, two hours later.

“Scootaloo, Alexander said that he is awaiting for us at Holodeck 2 to go on a trip, whatever that means... “

“Are ya coming?” Apple Bloom said, finishing Sweetie`s sentence.

“Nope. Sorry girls, i have to study some things.”The pegasus filly said, with out removing her eyes from the console.

“Study? Scoots, you never do that. What is going on?”

“Its a secret. I cant tell you now.”

“Okay, good luck for whatever you are doing!”Sweetie Belle said, going trough the doors.

“Computer: Bring up ‘Starfleet Operations manual 101 Ops station’.” Scootaloo said, making sure that no one would see or hear.

  _____________________________________________________

“What?!?!?!?”

The four ponies said in unison.

“The elements will only be able to stun the creature.”Twilight said again, this time only a few gasps filled the air.

“But then how will we defeat it?”

“We won`t: The Enterprise will.”

“How?”Rainbow asked.

“They will open a black hole for 7 seconds, just enough to consume the thing.”

“Sugarcube, what the hay is a black hole?

“Imagine that space is a sheet of rubber.”

The ponies nodded.

“Now imagine that everything that has a mass causes it to bend, like when you put a small piece of lead in the sheet of rubber.”

They nodded again.

“A black hole is something so heavy that it rips a hole in the rubber sheet.”

“”Now wait a second!” The cyan pegasus said. “I may not be an egghead like you, but isn`t opening a hole in the universe anywhere close to Equestria a tiny bit dangerous???”

“Yes, but it will collapse a few seconds after it opens, no harm done.”

“Twilight, I am going to take your word, but I still don’t fell comfortable with the idea of a bucking hole in space just around the corner.” The rainbow maned pegasus said, just before leaving.

___________________________________________

“A warp core overload?” Said the bald stallion, a frown on his face.

“Seems to be the only solution up until now. We would need to get close to the creature to get the maximum chance to hit the target. I recommend a saucer separation, and only use the battle bridge for the maneuver.”

“Very well. We shoudnt take any unnecessary risks withs the crews lives.”

____________________________________________

Rarity went inside the Ten Foward, with a wide smile and carring the pad with her magic.

“So, how are you now that Worf knows what you feel for him?” Guinan asked.

“I am 100% sure that he liked it, am I right?”

“At first he was a little shocked. But he says he will think about it.” Rarity`s smile faded.

“Think about it?” Her eyes were watering.

“Rarity dear. It may not look like it, but he has a heart of gold. Worf is afraid of hurting you.”

Her smile came back, a little smaller.

“Well, stage 2. Here it says that it is common to the Klingon female to start the relationship. I want to impress him, maybe a good drink...”

“Oh, I have just what you are looking for.” Guinan said, levitating an old looking metal bottle from under the bar.

“What is it?”

“Klingon Bloodwine, from the vintage of 2360. Worf`s favorite, young and sweet.”

“Do you mind if i take a sip? I don’t want to be surprised by the taste when the time comes.”

“Sure, here.”The brown alicorn levitated a small chalice to the bar and filling it to the half.

Rarity took the glass to her face, it smelled strong, stronger then Applejack`s whiskey, but sweet. She took a small sip.

“Strong!” She said, it indeed was, but sweet at the same time. It also had a small residual metallic taste. Perhaps that’s the why it’s called Bloodwine. “Anything else he would like?”

“Well, I would recommend a large portion of gagh. But we don't have any aboard, and replicated gagh is disgusting. I say take a dish of targ cheese with Zilm'kach jelly. Here, have some.”

The dish had four slices of yellowish cheese, covered with a caramel colored jelly. Rarity took one slice with her telekinesis and took a bite.

“Delicious!” The cheese had gummy texture with a slight sour taste, while the jelly had a sweet taste with a flavor that could be described as close to an apricot. “Out of curiosity: what is gagh?”

“A dish of serpent worms. Klingon's normally eat them alive.” Rarity`s face was that of disgust.

“Well i think I will stick with the cheese and jelly, thanks. But now i have another problem: You said he had a son, and I assume they share room. How do I avoid him between, you know, the act.” Her cheeks were on fire, even though she knew Guinan wouldn`t tell anyone.

“Don’t worry. I will take care of him for tonight.”

“You would do that for me?”

“Yes. He will understand that his father needs a private time.”

         ____________________________________________

O’Brien had been at the teleporter room for three hours, all that time he had spent looking at the chapter’s title.

Equine Reproduction

He had read the entire book. It was quite fascinating. But he still felt that, for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to look at that reproduction chapter.

C’mon O’Brien! It’s just like a normal science book, like the ones back on elementary school!

As soon as he got down the page, he regretted the decision. Without warning, a huge picture of a mare’s uterus, as seen from a camera placed on its entrance, appeared. He immediately shut the pad down.

Fuck! I really didn’t need that! I guess they don’t waste time on drawings and diagrams when the said animal isn’t intelligent...

“Mister?” He looked to his right, a small pegasus filly stood.

“Hi there kid. What do you want?”

“Sir, could you take me to Ponyville and back?”

He thought for a while.

“Yes, but you are going to need a teleporter marker. Let me get you one.”

He typed a few commands on the console, and a bracelet with a small button appeared on the platform.

“What is that for?” Scootaloo asked, O`Brien took the bracelet and got it on her right hoof.

“Damn, this is awkward without hands.” He said, cleaning his tongue on his right foreleg. “This baby emits a signal when you press the button. It will let me know when you want to come back. Now, any special location?”

“Ponyville library.” She said, stepping on the platform

“Okay.” He pressed a few buttons and she started to dematerialize “Call me when you want to come back.”

The nightfall of the last day

“That was awesome!!!” Said Sweetie Belle.

“Yeah! How come all of that fits inside the ship?” Apple Bloom asked.

“It doesn’t. I don't know exactly how, but its kind of crated on the spot, like the teleporter. We are here.” The small zebra colt said pointing at the door that said, transporter room 1.

“Okay, bye!”Said the unicorn filly, waving to Alexander. They went inside the room.

“Oh, what do you need?” Said the spotted stallion.

“Could you take us to Ponyville? It`s getting late and we want to go home.” Said Apple Bloom.

“Sure. Get on the platform.” The two fillies went.

“Wait!”Said Apple Bloom. “Where is Scootaloo?”

“She said she would stay. Something about more studying.”

“And where is she going to sleep?”

“She said she would stay with Guinan.”

“Oh, okay.”

“You two ready?” O’Brien asked.

“Yes.”The two fillies answered. They stared to glow and a few seconds later found themselves just outside Ponyville library.

“End of shift. Now I am going to bed.” O’Brien said with a yawn. I wonder what Keiko made for supper. For some reason a dish of hay sounds delicious now...

      ______________________________________

Scootaloo had been working with the console at the replicating center for almost half an hour now.

“Okay, the size is right, the colors are correct, the material is the same. Replicate.”

The table started to emit a blue glow, a few seconds later there was a helmet. She got it in her hooves and put it on her head.

“A perfect match! And looks just like the one Commander Hurricane had!”She said, looking at the book ‘The History of Pegasi’ next to the console. “Now, for the rest of the armor.” And started to feed the computer with measurements and information.

    ____________________________________________

“She’s not here.” Sweetie said. “Must still be on the ship.”

“Yeah, Ah don’t think ya sister is going to give up on that stallion. C’mon, lets go to the farm, I am sure my sis will let you sleep there today.”

“Okay.” The unicorn filly said, following her friend to her home.

  ______________________________________________

Worf was tired. It had been an exhausting day and the fact that he had still went to his weekly battle training program made him even more tired. But as he opened the door, he noticed three things. 1: Alexander wasn’t anywhere. 2: There was a soft melody on the air. 3: All the light on the room came from candles.

“Is someone there?’ He asked.

“Yes...” Came a soft, feminine voice replying.

“Where is Alexander?” Rarity came out of the shadows, just enough to be seen.

“Guinan said she would take care of him for tonight.”

“You are really insistent, aren’t you?”

“Can you blame a mare for fighting for her stallion?” She said, beating her eyelids together, she levitated a cup towards him “Bloodwine?”

Worf raised an eyebrow, but took the glass on his hoof and took a sip.

“This is real Bloodwine, where did you get it?”

“Guinan had it. She said I would make a better use of it. I also brought you a dessert, hope you like it.” She levitated a small slice of cheese and jelly to him.

“I am sorry, but I can’t.”

Rarity’s eyes started to water, her face bending with sadness.

“Why? Don’t you like me?”

“It’s not that! I am afraid I will hurt you.” He said, a sincere concern on his voice.

“You don’t get it, do you?” She said, giving him a small nibble on the cheek. “I don’t care. I just want to be with you.”

Worf was now on a difficult position: She was teasing him, and he couldn’t say he didn’t like or didn’t wanted it anymore, but he still was unsure that he would hurt the delicate white unicorn accidentally.

“Rarity, look. I may end up hurting you. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“And I am a Klingon, this isn’t going to be delicate.”

“Yes.” Her face was flushing red with the thought.

“Are you sure you want this?”

“How many times do I have to say? YES.” She gave him a long, passionate kiss.

______________________________________________

Scootaloo was tired, she had already placed her new adquired armor at the hiding place, and now she wanted to sleep.

There were just three ponies in Ten Foward: A unicorn colt and an earth pony mare in the corner, finishing their drinks and Guinan on the bar.

“Guinan?"

“Yes child?”

“Is there somewhere where I can sleep?”

“Isn’t your family going to be worried that you are not home tonight?”

“Nah, I was going to sleep in the crusaders tree house today.”

“Ok, you can sleep with me. But Alexander is already there.”

“Thanks Guinan! You are really nice.” The pegasus filly said, with a yawn. “Uh, where is your room?”

The dark brown alicorn pointed at a door behind the bar.

“Thanks!” The orange pegasus said, going trough the doors.

___________________________________________

Picard took the last sip of tea and placed the cup on the replicator.

“Mr. Data, you have the bridge.”

“Aye sir. The attack will take place tomorrow at 9 A.M.”

“9 A.M. ? Why is that?”

“In the period between 9 A.M. and 10:12 A.M. the Kraken will be at the moon’s gravitational field, this will avoid any debris from falling towards the planet.”

“I see. 9 A.M. it is. Did Geordi already program the core ejection sequence?”

“Yes.”

“Then it’s done. Have a good night.”

“You too sir.” The android said as Picard went inside the turbolif, only him and Ensign Noble were still on the bridge.

Data then got up and walked towards the engineering console. The modifications to the warp core ejection sequence were essential to his plans.

   _________________________________________

Spike burped a letter.

“Twilight! A letter from the Princess!” The lavander unicorn levitated the scroll from the dragon's hand and started to read.

My faithful student Twilight Sparkle.

I have been contacted by the Enterprise. The attack against the threat will take place tomorrow at 9:00 hours.

The elements will be used to stun the creature and allow for a better chance of defeat. The meeting place will be at the palace gardens, I will teleport you and your friends there.

Your princess and teacher.

Princess Celestia.

“Spike, tell the girls, tomorrow here at 8 A.M. .”

“Okay!” The baby dragon said, rushing through the library’s door.

     __________________________________________

“Hey, you are Scootaloo, aren’t you?”

The pegasus looked at the source of the voice, a small zebra colt with a strange three spikes cutie mark was right behind her.

“Yes, you must be Alexander, Worf’s son, am I right?”

“Yes, why are you here anyway?”

“I have to do something tomorrow and if I leave the ship I might miss it.”

“Okay. Have a good night.” He said, laying on the mattress. Scootaloo thought for a few seconds.

“Alexander?”

“Yes?”

“You father is really brave and loyal.”

“I know, after all, he is a Klingon. Why do you say?”

“Nothing, just making sure you know...” She laid on her mattress, leaving a somewhat confused zebra colt behind with that statement.

The final countdown

Enterprise, Worf’s room. 7 A.M.

Worf woke up and once again noticed three things : 1, Rarity wasn’t beside him. 2, there was an pleasant smell on pancakes on the air. 3, the room was way to organized for a place that had seen a Klingon mating.

“Good morning!” He looked to the source of the voice. She was caring a plate of pancakes.

“Morning.” He said, not very sure of how to ask her if she was hurt.

“Pancakes with jelly?” The unicorn floated the plate with 3 pancakes covered with jelly and fruit pieces to the table.

“Yes, thanks. If you don’t mind, did I...” She stooped him by putting her hoof on his lips

“No dear, you didn’t break any of my bones. Sure, my back right leg hurts a little and I am a little sore. But by far the only thing that actually appears is the bite mark.” She pointed at the teeth marks on her cheek, a small amount of blood on them. “I am more then willing to endure this.”

“I have to get ready for the morning shift.” He said, getting on his hooves. Only to be stoped by the white mare.

“No, first you are going to have your breakfeast. It is the most important meal of the day.”

“Fine.” He turned around and sat at the table. She put the plate before him.

“Hope you enjoy.” She said with a smile.

__________________________________________

Enterprise, Guinan’s room. 7:15 A.M.

It’s time.

Scootaloo stood up. She looked to the zebra colt that slept on the other mattress.

I hope you can deal with this.

He looked a little younger then her. She couldn’t await any longer. 7:20.

T-minus 1:40 hours. I have to get the damper.

____________________________________________

Ponyville, library. 7:30 A.M.

“Twilight! Breakfast is ready.”

“Thanks Spike.” The lavender unicorn looked at the daisy pancakes. “Could you get the girls here? We have only half an hour before the princess comes get us.”

“Okay Twi. Be right back.”

________________________________________

Canterlot, royal garden. 8:00 A.M.

Picard, Riker, Worf, the elements of harmony and Princess Celestia stood in the small green field.

“The attack will begin in one hour. When it does, we will contact you from this device.” He pointed at a small box with an antenna. “And should fire the Psionic wave.” Picard said, pointing at the creature. It was possible to see it with a naked eye as it made it's way towards Equestria. “It will stun it and help the warp core to reach it’s destination.” If they failed, there would be only a few hours before the end.

“Tic tok goes the clock until your fate arrives, tic tok goes the clock for the crew of the Enterprise...” They looked at the source of the voice.

“Q, I hope you take us home after this.” Riker said.

“Yes I will. You are about to learn a important lesson. Try to remember it.” He was by far in his most serious moment. With a snap of fingers, he was gone.

“That song gave me the creeps, and that can’t be good.” Said Pinkie, far more serious then normal.

“I thank you for the help Picard. I hope you return safetly.” Said Celestia.

“Worf, I may never see you again. So here is something for you to remember me.” Rarity floated a small diamond carved to look like a unicorn to him. “Its not very much, but I hope it does it.” She gave him a kiss.

“Thanks. Enterprise: Three to beam up.” The three starfleet officials were now gone, back to the ship.

“So, did you two do it?” Rainbow asked without any kind of warning.

“Yes...” Rarity said, without thinkg. And imeadtly blushed. “I mean, I, oh dear...”

“Don’t sweat sugarcube. But tell me, what is that on your cheek?” Said Applejack, pointing at the bite mark.

“Oh, you see: Klingons bite their mates to  taste their blood and get their scent. He has one of this on his cheek too.”

“Kinky!” Said Pinkie.

“And another question: Is it true what they say about zebras?” The cyan pegasus said.

“Say about what?” Rarity asked.

“That they are bigger...”

“RAINBOW!!!”

___________________________________________

Enterprise, main bridge. 8:50 A.M.

“Doctor Crusher, Counselor Troi and Geordi: You have the bridge. Picard to all decks: evacuate to saucer section.”

The crew started to move, there were just a few people left on the stardrive section, and in a few moments, it was clear.

“Done sir.”Data said.

“Good mister Data. Geordi, make sure this ship is safe from any debries.”

“Aye sir.”

“Mister Data, beam us to the battle bridge.”

Data, Riker, Worf and Picard started to glow, and then appearded at the battle bridge on the stardrive section.

“Good, now...” A sound of an activating phaser was heard. Picard a Riker turned to the two officers, who now had their phasers armed and pointing at captain an first officer.

“What is the meaning of this???” Riker asked.

“I am sorry sir.” Data said. “But if we just throw the warp core at the creature the successs chance will be below 3 percent.”

“And how is mutiny going to help improve the situation?” Picard asked, anger on his voice.

“We will guide the core to the target. Manually.” Worf said.

“What??? Can’t you just program the computer to do it?”

“No sir, the stardrive section computer isn’t powerful enough to do it. Neither will the ship make it without proper defence. We will have to pilot it manually.” Data said.

“But you need at least three people to pilot the stardrive section, you are only two!!!” Riker said on an last attempt to persuade the officer to abandon their plan.

“It will have to do.” Worf said and then pressed a button on the tactical console, Picard and riker started to glow.

“No!!! Worf!!!”

_________________________________

Canterlot, royal gardens. 8:55 A.M.

Two ponies started to materialize, much to the elements and the princess surprise.

“Picard, wasn’t you supposed to...”

“Picard to Worf!!! Damn it he left me without the comm badge!”

“Gentlecolts, what is going on?” Rarity asked.

“Its Worf and Data, they think throwing the core isn’t safe, they are going to throw the entire stardrive section into it!”

The ponies and princess gasped.

“But, that will kill him!!!” Rarity said.

“He knows.” Picard added.

The white unicorn's eyes started to fill with tears. Her love was about to commit suicide to ensure the safety of an entire planet. Then an strange noise, like something bursting open was heard from the device.

         __________________________________________

Enterprise, battle bridge. 8:58 A.M.

The two officers looked at the source of the noise, a small pegasus filly wearing an black and gold armor stood beside a open hatch.

“Cadet Scootaloo reporting for duty!”

“Child, what are you still doing here? And how come you don’t appear on the sensors?”

The filly took a small piece of equipment an threw it to Data.

“This is a Bio damper. Where did you get this?”

“I made it myself, it’s easy when the computer can make all the parts you need. All I had to do was assemble it.” She said with a smile on her face.

“We have to take you back to the planet.”

“NO!!!”

The two officers looked to the filly.

“Child, you will DIE if you stay here.”

“I am aware sir.” She said to Worf, keeping a military stance.

“You wish to die. Why?” Data asked.

“All of my life I have been following Rainbow. Trying to get her attention, her approval. I want she to remember me as a hero, someone to be proud of, not ‘that squirt that would allways be kissing my ass” she said.

"How do you know what we are about to do?" The zebra asked.

“I heard you two talking yesterday. And I also heard that this ship is hard to pilot without at least three crew members, so i studied. I read the entire manual on how to operate the Ops station.”

An alert siren started to play.

“The Kraken is now on the moon’s gravitational field. Scootaloo, to Ops. Worf, Tactical. I will take control of the other systems.”

“I just hope you learned something from the manual.” Worf said to the self proclaimed cadet that was now operating the console.

      ________________________________________

Canterlot, royal garden. 9:01 A.M.

None of the present could believe what they had just heard from the radio.

“SCOOTS!!!” Rainbow dash was crying. She had never cried this hard before. That little filly was about to commit suicide, and it was technically her fault. Rarity wasn’t emitting any sound, but her tears flowed freely through her face.

“There is nothing we can do for them, but wait the signal for the activation of the elements. I am sorry.” Picard said, comforting the two crying mares.

    ___________________________________________

Enterprise, battle bridge. 9:03 A.M.

“Scootaloo, take us in. Half impulse.”

“Aye.”

They were close now, the creature would notice their presence an moment now...

*CLANK*

“Worf, status!”

“Shields at 82 percent.”

“It is time. Scootaloo, evasive maneuvers.” The orange pegasus filly started to turn the ship, only for it to be hit once again.

“Damn, we can’t make it. We have to attack!” She announced.

“Worf, fire phasers, maximum power.”

The phasers hit one of the creature's tentacles, cutting it out. But this only made it angry. Another hit. This time, a strange music started to play on the ship’s speakers.

“Is that supposed to happen commander?” Scootaloo asked, as there was no mention to batle music anywhere on the Ops manual.

“No, probably one of the computer cores started to short circuit. Ignore it.” Data said. “Mr Worf, I am diverting power from the life support to the shields. We wont need it.”

“Aye sir.”

Another hit.

“We need to get in position. Scootaloo, full impulse. Computer, activate warp core directive 42 omega.”

“Directive active. 60 seconds to singularity.”

“Hold on!” Worf said as a tentacle came on direction of the screen. Another hit. “Shields at 40 percent and...”

“WORF!!! LOOK OUT!!!” Before he could do anything, he was kiked off his seat. When he looked back, he saw Scootaloo.

“Kid! What...” A small trail of blood started to pour from the corner of the pegasus mouth. She smiled.

“I shall fly towards death itself.” Scootaloo hit the ground, Worf then saw: a two meter long duranium bar from the ships hull had got loose from the Kraken’s attack. It then flew back to the Enterprise and went through the view screen, leaving a small hole that was closed by the automated containment system and piercing through the filly’s torso.

“Worf, get to tactical!” Data shouted. “Activate the elements now.”

         ___________________________________

Canterlot, royal garden. 9:06 A.M.

There was no time for feelings. The elements gatherded around Twilight. All it took was four seconds. The rainbow ray shoot its way up towards the threat.

"Good luck you three..." Picard said to himself.

      _____________________________________

Enterprise, battle bridge. 9:06 A.M.

The rainbow beam went through the creature, making it spasm in pain.

“Fourty seconds to impact!” Data said. Suddenlly, the ops console overloaded, sending the android flying through the bridge.

“Data!!!” Worf looked at his friends corpse, his head had been torn off his body. There was no repair this time.

“Thirty seconds to impact.’’ The computer announced.

It didn’t matter now, they had done it. Even if they were destroyed now, the core would overload and take the creature with it. Worf finally stopped to listen to the music.

For my son I had always a plan, for to raise him as best as I can.

Oh well you can bet, my only regret is to not see him grow to a man.

It was painfully like his own life, he thought of Alexander and hoped he would be okay with his grandfather back in the Ural mountains.

Worf sat beside the fallen mare and his android friend head and oppened their eyes.

'Cause this ship's going down

All on account of the weather

He screamed. Not by fear, anger or regrat. But to warn death: Three warriors were about to enter her realm.

Though we'll drown

There's no need to frown

'Cause we're all going together!

“One.”

The core imploded.

The return

The eight ponies and alicorn in the royal garden looked up. At first, it seemed like nothing was happening. But then the creature started to shrink, collapsing into itself.

Then the black hole collapsed.

There was a explosion, and the debris of what once was the greatest threat to Equestria floated towards the moon.

Rarity and Rainbow were crying. They had just lost two very important ponies.

“I must say Rainbow, I didn’t think Scootaloo was going to do that.” The cyan pegasus looked to Q, who stood looking up.

“YOU DID THIS!!!” She flew towards him, only to notice he had teleported next to Picard.

“Q, I fail to see the point in this lesson of yours. The only thing that happened is that three people died.”

“The lesson isn’t for you Picard.” He snapped his fingers. “It’s for him” He pointed to the right.

There were gasps of commotion, and them of horror. Worf, Scootaloo and Data stood. But they were dead, like statues. Frozen on their death stances.

“Oh squirt.”Rainbow said, looking at the rod that pierced through th filly’s body. “What hapned to you?”

“She got in the way, did it to save Worf.”Q added. “But Data is the one being tested here.”

“What do you mean? He is dead! There is no way he can learn something!”

“Oh you mortals, allways taking things like life or death as final.” Q went to Scootaloo. He stood beside her and started to pull the rod out, causing ponies to gasp and Fluttershy to look away. After the rod was out of the filly’s body, he snapped his finger. The wound closed and the orange pegasus gasped for air as her eyes shot oppen.

“SCOOTS!!!” Rainbow said, as she hugged the now living filly. Q proceeded to Worf.

The zebra did’t have any apparent injury, but as he snapped his fingers, his rib cage stated to move. The cracking sound indicating that ribs were going back to their proper positions. His eyes shoot oppen and he gasped for air.

“Worf!”Rarity ran for the confused stallion crying “I thought I had lost you.” She hugged him.

Q was now staring at Data. His disembodied head was floating just above the neck, wires and positronic relays loose and cut. He pushed the head back to the neck and snapped his fingers, a light glow and the neck had been repaired.

“Data Data Data...”

“Q, You brought me, Worf and Scootaloo back to life. Why?”

“Those two I brought out of compassion. But you I brought back because the Continuum wishes so.”

“The Continuum?” Riker asked.

“What is the Continuum?” Twilight asked Picard.

“Its where all the Q’s live.” He answered.

“The Q Continuum wanted me to die. Why?”

“Elementary my dear Data. You need to know death. Real death, not a simple shutdown. Death.”

“But why?”

“You are unique Data, and the Continuum thinks you will actually be able to expand yourself to the point where you will become a Q.”

“Like you tried to do with me?” Riker said.

“No, the Continuum thinks Data has the potential to do it by himself.”

“Does that mean we can leave Q?” Picard asked.

“Yes, your lesson is done.” He snapped his fingers. “The ship is back. I will send you back when you are ready.” He snapped his fingers again and was gone.

“Never do anything like that again Scoots! NEVER! Do you promise me?” The cyan mare said to the armored filly.

“Yes.” She answered.

“Picard, I once again thank you for the help.” Celestia said.

“It was nothing your majesty. We must go now, I am sure that the federation is in panic over the disappearance of the Enterprise.”

“Well, it’s final now. Goodbye Worf.” Rarity kissed the stallion in a long, passionate kiss.

“Enterprise: Four to beam up.” Riker said. The three ponies and zebra started to glow and disappeared.

________________________________________

Alpha quadrant, USS Challenger.

“Sir, I am detecting what appears to be a wormhole.”

“On screen.”

What looked like a lightining storm was happening.

“Sir, there appears to be a ship coming out. It’s the Enterprise!”

The large Galaxy-Class ship emerged from the anomaly, that colapsed right after.

“Hail them.”

The screen lit up. Revealing not the crew, but several equines.

“What the...”

“Don’t worry captain.” Said a bald horse. “We should return to our normal form any moment now.”

“Normal, what...” Before the capitain of the Challenger could finish, a bright flash of light lit the screen, it lasted fot a few seconds and then vanished. Now the crew was human again.

“Much better!” Picard said looking at his own fingers. “I will send a full report to Starfleet, but if you are curious: Q.”

“I see. Welcome back Picard.”

The sequel

Find it here.

http://www.fimfiction.net/story/6338/The-key-of-darkness

Three fillies and a teleporter

“Apple Bloom! Why are we going to Sugarcube Corner?” Scootaloo asked.

“I saw that kind of teleportation spell before! It isn’t even a spell, it’s a machine!”

“A machine? That teleports?” Sweetie Belle asked, with an eyebrow raised.

“Yes! Here, let’s get inside Pinkie’s lab.”

“Pinkie’s lab?” Scootaloo asked.

“Yes! We are here!”

The three fillies and bunny looked at the small door, they were behind Sugarcube corner. Apple Bloom opened it and revealed a lab worth of Twilight's wildest dreams.

“Wow! How did pinkie even get all this stuff?” Sweetie Belle said, looking at the wonders of the room. Apple Bloom didn’t answer; she was too busy looking for something.

“Found it!” She said, holding a pink book over her head.

“What is it?” Sweetie Belle asked. The filly got the book on the ground and the other crusaders gathered around her. It said ‘Teleporter project λ-06 instruction manual’ written in Pinkie's handwriting. Apple Bloom opened the book, read a few pages and proceeded to a nearby metal door.

“What was the password?” She asked herself. Of course! She thought as she typed. Cupcakes.

The door opened, revealing an oval shaped chamber. It had no door and what appeared to be a control console on the side.

“Apple Bloom, are you sure that thing can teleport something?” Scootaloo asked, with a dubious tone.

“Of course it can! Let me show you!” She grabbed the book and started reading it. Then took a cupcake and placed it on the teleporter pad, and pressed some buttons at the console. The two fillies and rabbit watched in awe as the cupcake disappeared. “See? I told you so.”

“But where is the cupcake now?”

Apple Bloom pointed at Sweetie’s back, there stood an unharmed cupcake.

“Amazing!” Said Sweetie Belle, taking the cupcake from her back and biting it. “But how does this help us find my sister and her friends?”

“Well, Pinkie told me that while she was testing it, she would often lose a cupcake or muffin due a wrong set of coordinates. She wanted to know where they were going so…” She went to a chest on the corner of the room and took what looked like a spear mounted on a tripod. “She built this.”

“What in Celestia’s name is that?” Scootaloo asked. “And how is it going to help us?”

“Pinkie called it a Transporter Target Localizer. I’ve no idea how it works, but she got every single cupcake back.”

“And how is it going to help us get Rainbow Dash and the others back?”

“If we get this at the library, the teleporter will send us to wherever the girls went.”

“Sounds good enough to me. Let’s go!” Said Sweetie Belle.

“There is one problem however. The moment the localizer is activated, we will be teleported. Which means one of us will have to be left behind.”

Before the fillies could say anything, Angel stood up and grabbed the device.

“Ok Angel. When you get to the library, all you have to do is flip the pink switch, ok?” Apple Bloom explained, the rabbit nodded and ran towards the library. “Ok girls! We have only a few minutes before Angel gets to the library. Get to the teleporter!”

The three crusaders stood next to each other at the teleporter pad, each second seemed to last an eternity.

“So, once we are there, what do we do?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“Search, rescue and destroy!” The two fillies looked at Scootaloo, who had a helmet on her head and a lit cigar on her mouth.

“Scootaloo! Where did you get a cigar?” Sweetie Belle asked, the Pegasus filly pointed at a broken glass box that had a sign saying ‘in case of rescue operation, riot or zombies’. Sweetie face hoofed. “Look, you can keep the helmet, but if you keep the cigar we’ll get in trouble.”

“Why?”

“We aren’t supposed to smoke until we turn 18! Now get rid of it!” Apple Bloom said.

“Fine.” She spit the cigar and stomped on it.

A green light appeared on the console, and the three fillies started o vanish.

“CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS: RESCUE MISSION YAY!!!”

        __________________________________________________

Aside from the away mission, O’Brien’s day was now going pretty much the same, he had spent the last half of an hour reading veterinarian books about horses at the transporter console. For some reason, he now couldn’t bring himself to the reproduction chapter.

C’mon! It’s just some pictures, not porn!

After a while, he decided that it would be better to leave it be. He was about to go back to his quarters and get some rest when the teleporter pad started to glow.

“What the…”

The console started to emit a warning: whatever was beaming aboard wasn’t going to make it.  The signal degradation showed that whoever was coming was pushing its teleporter way beyond its limit. O’Brien had to act quickly.

“Oh no, I am not going to miss a transport! And I don’t care that it wasn’t me who started it!!!”

He started to slide his hooves on the console’s screen and was able to connect the Enterprise’s teleporter to the one that was transporting. The cargo finally materialized: three fillies.

“Who are you? Where is Rainbow Dash?” The orange filly shouted, seeming to don’t care for the fact that O’Brien was much larger and older than her.

“Girl, calm down! You and your friend almost became a pile of gooey meat!”

The three fillies gasped.

“We what?” Asked the cream-colored one.

“You three almost died. Whoever sent you either were very stupid, tried to commit murder or was very desperate. The teleporter you used was obviously made for short-range transport, and sending you three together must have pushed it way beyond its limit.”

The crusaders were pale from the revelation, but Scootaloo quickly snapped out of it.

“You still didn’t answer my question: where is Rainbow and her friends?”

“They are with Geordi: he is showing them the ship.”

The three fillies started to look at each other.

“You mean, you are not here to conquer Equestria or kidnap them and ask for a ransom?” The small unicorn asked.

“Of course not!”

“Can we see them?” Scootaloo asked, doubtful.

“Sure. Just follow this guy.” He turned to the security officer. “Take them to the Ten Forward.”

“Okay. Bye mister.” Said Apple Bloom, before following the white security stallion.

   ______________________________________

The conference lounge was full. There were two earth ponies, one Pegasus, two unicorns and a zebra.

“Gentleman, we have a problem. Q didn’t say what he wants and that concerns me.”

“And why is that?” The voice didn’t come from the senior staff, Picard knew who it was.

“Q!” He said to the draconequus.

“What is it that you want?” Asked Worf.

“If you all really want to know, there is an evil approaching Equestria. I brought you here to fight it, and learn an important lesson on the way.”

“Q, I…” A finger blocked his mouth.

“Hush Picard. Believe me; I am doing humanity a favor. You may not understand it at first, but it is one of the most important lessons mankind has to learn.”

“The last time you did mankind a favor 18 lives were lost!” Riker said.

“I said it before and I will say I again: If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought to go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous, with treasures to satiate desires, both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid. This time you may lose more, or lose less. Your effort to survive and thrive will determine it.” He snapped his fingers and disappeared, leaving the senior staff alone.

“Data, I want continuous scans, if an atom decides to move, I want to know. Worf, have the weapons array and shields ready. Counselor, tell me of any presence you feel. Dismiss.”

Epilogue

“Come in.” The door opened, Riker came in.

“How is the report going?”

“Fine, but I think Starfleet will find it hard to belive.” Said Picard.

“Yeah, it's not every day that the crew gets turned into equines with sorted colors. We are holding a party at Holodeck 2, to celebratev Worf’s and Data's ressurection. You are the guest of honor.”

“Thanks, I will come by...” A bip. The captain and first officer went to to the bridge.

“Sir, another anomaly. It is the same kind as the one we just came through.” Data said.

“On screen.”

The large spiral cloud was revolving around itself. Another bip.

“There is a ship coming through, it appears to be a Type 7 shuttle. But it doesn't have any name or serial number.”

The small ship came through the anomaly, it was completely white, save for a small crescent moon painted on its side.

“Hail them.”

An empty room came into view, some murmurs could be heard.

“This is captain Jean-Luc Picard from the federation starship Enterprise.”

“Oh. Hi there!” A woman come to view, only her face could be seen. She was apparently human, except for one detail: Her hair was pink. “I am Pinkie!!!”

“What?” Picard was shocked. Is this one of those ponies?

“Before you say anything, can I ask you for something?”

“What exactly?” The captain didn’t really have any kind of training for a situation like this.

“Can you get me and my friends some clothes? I don't care about walking around naked but it’s kind of hard to hop around without falling when you have two orbs that weight, like, a million tons on your chest. They keep going up and down. It is really hard to keep balance. They keep changing my center of gravity you know!“