Another Human in Equestria Story
Let's start with the pleasantries, shall we? My name is Drew, a 20 year old who like to play video games, watch YouTube videos, read fan-fiction that isn’t total trash, and somehow finds the time to work 30 hours a week and be a full time student at Community College over the summer. If I wasn’t killing myself before, my ten hour days with five minute breaks would be doing it for me. All in all I would say i’m a boring individual with a less boring life.
To say I had a boring life would be a lie. I mean, how many people do you know that got to sing in New York, Boston, Canada and Mexico. High school was defiantly a much calmer time compared to what followed. My first year of collage was kinda fantastic. I found my special someone, aced all my classes, and got to continue singing all around North America. How I wish life would have continued that way. Year two of collage was kinda terrible. I only passed my choir classes, only passing two of six isn't how you keep the school and your family on side. It felt like for about half a year the only one I could count on was my special someone.
Now let me say, I was fully aware that I needed to change my course before things became truly unrecoverable. But just as I was getting ready to apply for year three classes my parents (or more accurately my father) decided if I didn't move home and go to a local community collage he would pull out of my loans. Given that he co-signed I wasn't given a choice to stay at the collage I attended. This yanked me away from not only my new friends but the only person I felt understood how hard a year it already was. Depression is one hell of a drug kids and despite what people without it may say, no, you can't will yourself better. My solution was to turn to medication and its a wonder what 20MG of sweet sweet CITALOPRAM every night before bed will do for ya.
Despite being moved away from University (where all my friends are) and put into a community collage things didn't get better. One traffic ticket and a family member that forgot how to breath later and depression reared its ugly head and embraced me once again. This combined with my now daily arguments with father proved to be quite enough for me and after failing another three classes I decided I didn't want to go home and get yelled at by dad anymore.
Pulling the usual get out of home free card I hopped into my truck and changed into work clothes. Denice could always use more help for the start of summer. May 31st happened to fall on a Friday so off to work I went. As if constant depression wasn't enough I also worked a fast food job for minimum wage at age 20. The 30 minute drive down the highway 70 got me to my destination. Hardee's can suck my cock for how much they actually pay compared to how much work I do but I had some old high school friends their that made it bearable.
Now one might think crime would become more rare the further away from a city you are but in the great state of misery, *cough* Missouri, things like a car chase seem common. But when that car side swipes you specifically, a few things go through your mind. Things like 'fuck, it was me this time' and 'when did the world turn upside down' followed by 'when did my car start filling with water?'. If it wasn't for my mild concussion I probably would have unbuckled myself and gotten out. As it was, my world slowly started fading into the cold darkness before it was suddenly very white and very hot.
It felt like an eternity just floating, but my mind never gave it a second though. Was it really and eternity or just a few minutes? I was in a daze and nothing made sense, but at the same time I could feel myself sifting through my own memories. It was a mixing pot of emotion, happiness, sadness, joy, love, betrayal, depression, worry and hope. Some stronger than others but all a part of what made me, me. Another eternity and I fade back into consciousness only to be greeted by a voice I couldn’t recognize.
It was a strong voice, stern but it sounded worried. I glance up to see a foggy silhouette standing around my height. Something in my mind compelled me to more closer to this figure in the mist. Once more it called out and I could vaguely hear the higher tone of a female. Suddenly finding the strength to call back all I could weez out was a raspy “Who are you?”. As I inched my way closer to the figure she responded to my question with only a light laugh. Before I could get close enough to see her through the fog, she reached out; and through the mist I could only see the faintest form of a golden tan hoof. As we finally made contact I found myself getting extremely tired and fading once again into the void. Before I was gone I heard her clear as day. “Your destined to do great things in this world my little human.”
Darkness
-----------------PoV: Unknown------------------
His will is strong and despite what he thinks about himself he has done and can do amazing things. This is just a push in the right direction for him. And hey if we didn’t need the help he would be dead anyway. Let's just make sure his mind doesn't remember the lifetimes spend in a purgatory made just for him. That sure would ruin the fun given he would most likely die of shock.
However if he is to meet his full potential in as soon a time as possible, he'll need a body that can live up to that potential.
Scanning across the pool of available candidates was a small pool but no less a hard choice. That one would just be awkward, that one isn’t strong enough, this one is to sickly to survive. Looking closer I see one that … would it work? It's a bit of a long shot but given their history and his knowledge … hmm.
Well this body will suffice for now. But the question turns to when and that's a much more interesting question. How about soon after the Tirek ordeal. That should give plenty of time for my little human to become the pony he need to be.
---------------------PoV: Drew---------------------
If it wasn't for my mild concussion I probably would have unbuckled myself and gotten out. As it was, my world slowly started fading into the cold darkness before it was suddenly very white and very hot.
I'm not sure how long I was out but when I woke up it was cold. Not like shower cold, it was like deadass middle of winter cold. I try and listen to my surroundings only to hear the slight dripping of water reverberating around me. I don't know how I ended up in a cave and a part of me didn’t want to find out. I tried to move my arms only to be treated by sore muscles, numbness and pain. I couldn’t feel my hands or feet, something i’m attributing to numbness rather than some maniac kidnapping me for my limbs.
An so I laid their for what felt like an eternity. I eventually opened my eyes and found the cave was a lot brighter than I would have thought. Not just in light level, but also the colors. If you could imagine how dark a cave like this should be, total darkness with no light reaching you at all, this was a pleasant light gray at darkest. What bothered me more than my surroundings was what wasn’t on my person. My glasses must have fallen off in the …
THE CRASH! How did someone sideswiping me end with me in the middle of some less than dark, more than cold cave. Without moving to much as the numbness and soreness was still abundant, I moved my head over to see my backpack laying against the ground. My glasses were still nowhere to be seen but for some reason it appeared like I didn’t need them. Taking another look at my backpack I noted I could see it and the cave wall behind it clear as day. Making another small note that I could once again see in the middle of a cave I tried my luck at moving my hands. Only to look down and have a purple stud where my hand was supposed to be. The following reaction is about what happened for if I had to guess, 30 minutes.
Silence, just staring at the hoof in front of me. Doing at least 50 double checks confirming that yes indeed it was connected to my arm, and confirming that arm was connected to my torso. After mentally debating if my torso was actually connected to my body I looked down at my legs. Before complete and total panic took over I made the connection. How the fuck did I end up as a pony. Hooves instead of hands, legs that bend backwards, it was all checking out. Now the only question was WHY in the fuck. Was lake St. Louis always a portal to horse land or did I just become the luckiest unlucky person so ever grace gods forsaken earth.
So upon the realization that yours truly was a horse. I started to take inventory. The numbness was actually just my lack of certain body parts to feel, quite unfortunately this included my hands, feet, and manhood as the three main losses. However I did have some gains. A horn dawned above my nose, or snout I suppose, as well as a pair of wings. Less of note is the addition of femhood but let's just move past the implication of that change shall we. My coat was a purple, more lavender color and my hair had changed to a similarly lavender color with a single dark highlight running down the core of my now long hair.
What worried me the most was the blatant resemblance to a one Twilight Sparkle. Glancing down to see if the cutie mark had stuck I was surprised to see it hadn't. My flank was instead black. Wondering why I would look a carbon copy of Twilight but not have the mark, I summarized that if cutie marks where a representation of oneself it would make sense that I wouldn’t have hers.
Well, as much sense as me becoming Twilight Sparkle makes, but my mine is probably just trying to cope with the hole becoming Twilight Sparkle thing. Not having my own cutie mark was just a little depressing but the majority of my time in this world has just been me laying down in a cave so at least we know this isn’t my special talent. My attention turned from my own form to what had been brought with me after the crash.
My bag was a little roughed up but didn’t look all that worse for wear. Both the straps on the back were intact but i’m not sure how I plan on putting in on my back without hands and no understanding of how to make my magic work, if I could at all. None of the zippers were open but what surprised me was the bag felt completely dry. I felt completely dry for that matter, something that seemed odd given I did get pushed into a lake. Lets just go with ‘Magic’ because something tells me i’ll be saying that more than I should. Or maybe less given I have some idea of how this world works. So long as this world is less Madman and more Cannon I think i’ll be fine.
Back to my bag, I debated how to open it without losing all my dignity. Hooves are not the best for grabbing onto things, so my teeth will have to do. Bending down, something that was mildly harder given I was still trying to find out how my legs worked, I bit down on the zipper and put a hoof on the top handle. Opening my bag I was greeted by a few things of note. First off let it be clear that I would not have had this much stuff in my back on a normal day, but thankfully we were getting the carpets changed and I had packed some of my more valued items.
The first thing to greet my eyes were my regular clothes. My work clothes had disappeared when I took the big dip but my personal shirt, jeans, socks, boxers, and shoes were all accounted for. … It's not like I could wear them anymore, maybe the shirt but the other items don’t bend the same way my arms move. Behind the clothes was my personal gaming laptop. After giving it the once over I was pleased to see it in one piece with its charger not to far behind. No clue how I plan on pressing the keys with my hooves but knowing I have my steam library cast out a lot of dread I didn’t know was inside of me. It’s the little things I guess. Xbox controller followed, and beyond that was all my school work.
Onto the next pocket I found my Switch and a pair of headphones. Again i'm not sure how I play on playing the Switch or using the headphones, but not knowing how to use hooves didn’t stop me from opening my bag up so I guess i’ll manage. Other than that, my 3DS was also with me charger in all but that's about as much as I had. Unless you count about 20 flavors of gum and Twizzlers as important. Some pens and pencils was a nice touch given that I don’t have hands.
After about ten minutes of trying and failing to get my backpack on I was finally able to throw one strap around my right arm and the other around my neck. It was uncomfortable but manageable so long as I didn’t have to run away from anything. That said if I had to run away from anything anyway I would most likely trip over my own hooves and get caught. Everything situated and all my duck screaming in some combination of fear panic and excitement, I took to finding my way out of this cold ass cave.
Every wall despite being brighter than they had any right to be looked the same. I had almost considered the fact that maybe the background was just looping giving me time to think about my current situation. Speaking of my current situation I started to go over the prospect of being in the pony world. In terms of how much of the show I know? I could remember all the intro and closing stories, maybe an episode of note here or there, but I didn’t watch any of season six through eight. Something about people getting mad at villains being redeemed all over the place, but if that gives me a more friendly world to walk into I didn’t care in the slightest.
But what does this mean for me? I look like main character numero uno. That has all kinds of implications I don’t want to think about, but given that this is the third time I've seen that rock that looks like mickey mouse's head … nothing better to do. I had wings so that puts me past the season three finale. But that's really all I could go on while in this cave. It would probably be more helpful in finding out when I was if I didn’t have wings.
Off the topic of me and on to my life as a whole. Thinking back on it feels like so long ago now. I can’t explain why, but it feels like an eternity has passed by without my knowing. Pushing that though aside I started to wonder what this means for my life back home. What would people know about me being gone? Would they find a body or would I be pronounced lost under the lake? How would my family react to me not being around anymore? I start to hyperventilate. What about all my friends … what about tabi. Would I ever see them again? Do they think i'm … Dread filled my body and I found my breathing became heavy and slow. I wasn’t filled with any sadness at this time. I was filled with a form of dread I haven't felt since getting pulled away from my girlfriend at my first college. Suddenly I felt very nauseous and took a knee at my fourth stop at the Mickey rock.
It probably took about ten minutes of deep breathing and tear’s before I was ready to move on. Despite my rough relationship with some people I didn’t want them thinking I was dead. Knowing what my mother would go through. Fearing what my girlfriend would do. I could only hope I gave her enough support to follow her dreams for music. Thinking of all the things I would miss wouldn’t get me anywhere. So once again, I got up and pushed on this time intent to not pass the same rock again.
Finally after another twenty minutes of walking I was a bright light at the end of the tunnel. Literally as it turns out, because at the end of the tunnel was the glory of sunlight. Basking in its glory for no more than a moment I took stock of my surroundings. Lots of snow. Who could have guessed right? I appeared to be quite high up a mountain though there was a path in front of me that was really my only lead. Carefully following the path avoiding patches of ice as I go, I round a corner and to my surprise find a village. Slowly it starts to click that is is the village from season five. The name eludes me but I recognized the general layout of the buildings, specifically the building Twilight and co where put in after losing their marks.
I paused after taking in the town to try and think up an alibi. I was definitely not the twilight of this world and it would be easy for anyone to figure that out. One look at my flank and i'm called out as a fake, worse would be if they call changeling and figure throwing me down the mountain is a good idea. I set down my backpack and pulled out my shirt. I didn’t really get a good look at it before but it was huge on my new form. I was a pretty big guy as a human and I guess a 2x shirt on a body half my original height would look like an awkward dress. This is proven correct as I slide the shirt on and it goes down to my first leg joint. I do a double take and confirm that my leg isn’t broken and remember that it's fine. This is something i'm going to have to get used to, but for the moment seeing my leg bend backwards is still a shock.
Shirt in place and I put my bag back on just in time for a Unicorn to spot me and charge my way as I continue towards the town. He had a light blue coat and was wearing golden armor. His helmet covered his main and his tail looked to be cut short. I gave him a second glance and saw his eyes meet my own. He looked surprised for a moment but then started to slow his pace to match mine. After walking right next to me I continued to walk forward in a vain attempt to avoid the inevitable awkward conversation between me and this stallion.
After about thirty seconds of us just walking in silence the jerk had to go and start conversation.
“I wasn’t informed that you would be coming to these part princess?”
I inwardly grown at ‘princess’ but put on my best poker face to hide it. Thinking as fast as I could, I come up with the most shallow excuse I could come up with. “I made an impromptu visit to study the caves in the area.” I said. Only now thanking the fact that my voice was also a copy of twilight’s. He seemed to pause for a second before responding.
“It's just that, I didn’t hear word from anyone that one of the princesses and the element of magic no less, had shown up to town. That kind of stuff gets around.” He squinted his eyes questioningly at me.
“Well I did fly in, it makes sense that you wouldn’t have seen me in town.” I lied. It was the best I could come up with and didn’t sound as nice as twilight would have put it. I looked back for just a second to see his eyes, still squinting. His horn lit up for a moment and I felt a wave of heat pass over me. Shocked for only a second I looked back at the stallion who was giving me a bewildered look.
“I'm sorry princess” he said. “Your actions seemed odd and I thought you might be a changeling in disguise.”
The heat wave must have been his spell to detect changelings. Good to know it doesn’t use cutie marks to tell who is and isn’t a changeling. But if my actions, in the short time I had been in the presence of this pony, had a raised enough suspicion for him to cast a spell on his princess. I turned to him with a sorrowful gaze “No, i'm the one who should be sorry. I should have stopped by to see my friends before spending so much time in the caves” If nothing else he seemed to calm down after that. Even giving me a light smile.
He walked with me until we made it to the town. Everyone in town seemed to light up when they looked my way. I was fine being the unpopular kid at school so long as I had some real friends to fall back on, so having this many people looking at me specifically was mildly disconcerting. No one actually came up to talk to me though. They all gave me hellos and waves that I returned, despite having no idea who any of these people are. It felt like the polite thing to do. After about a minute of walking I made a turn and saw a train station in front of me. I had no idea where I was planning on going but the way I figure, I have three choices.
Ponyville and Twilight Sparkle, if anyone could help me find out what happened and give me the strongest start in this world it would be her. It would probably take a lot of explaining and a lot of notes on her end, but it would give me the foundation I needed to start a life in equestria, away from the masses.
Canterlot and Celestia, if anyone could get me home it would be her. Depending on what kind of mood she was in I could either get lots of help or dead. She does have the strongest magic I can think of and getting to see her wouldn’t be hard considering I look like her faithful student. But being so close to so many ponies put my chance of discovery at an all time high. Canterlot was a gamble at would leave me going home or disposed of by a Celestia that didn’t care for having two twilight's. I have no idea if that's how Celestia would act but would you mess with a god amongst men… er, ponies.
Middle of nowhere, low chance of survival but if the universe wanted me alive i'm sure I would find out a way. … ya this one is a dumb idea.
Given all my options, I think ponyville is the best bet. That is if I can get on the train without a ticket. Lets just hope my ‘new’ status as a princess would give me some free passage. If I can’t get free passage i'm sure I could gilt trip the stallion still following me to buy me a ticket ‘home’. Speaking of the guy still fallowing in my step, I finally got a look at his tramp mark. Nothing special, just a shield being pushed forward, but I was already planning what his name would be. Knowing my luck it would be a pun so with my last few steps before the train station I started brainstorming ideas.
Despite my best effort in the twenty seconds it took me to get to the train station the best I could come up with was Bit by Bit. I approached the nearly vacant train station and walked right up to the ticket booth. Behind the glass was a light red mare in a train cap taking a power nap in what I could only assume was a very uncomfortable position. Her cutie mark was that of a ticket so I guess she likes her job, I thought sarcastically. I stood there for no more than a second before I knocked on the glass to get her attention.
Without even opening her eyes she rolls over and (quite rudely if I might add) tells me “I’m on my regulated three hour nap, go get your ticket from another booth.”
I glanced around to see this was in fact the only booth in the small train station. Losing just a bit of my patience I calmly knock on the glass again only to have her wave me off. I glance to my left and see shieldie about to burst in anger. I was about to make a move to calm him down but upon thinking about what this could mean for me, I just gave him a glance and shifted my eyes in the mares direction.
He walked right past me and started banging on the glass much harder than the glass should be able to take. The poor mare inside the booth jumped out of her chair and fell ass first onto the floor before glancing up and seeing shield dude. Her expression soured and she looked like she was about to start an argument about how important her three hour nap time was, at least until her gaze move to my direction and the sour look morphed to surprise.
“Princess!” she exclaimed. I inwardly grown. “I didn’t know you were coming for a visit.”
That last sentence came out as more of a stutter on her end, but I quickly responded. “I just need a ticket to ponyville. I would fly but, uh … I have a lot of notes to go over from the caves north of here.”
Her surprised look changed suddenly as she reached down for a notepad and ink patch. It looked like the kind of ink used for fingerprints but was large enough for a hoof. She pushed them both out at me and I took the hint planting my hoof on the ink and giving the mare my (or twilight as it would be) hoof print.
“Thank you very much Princess Sparkle, the train for ponyville is just about to depart.” she said with a smile.
I smiled back and thanked her. For what i’m not sure, guess it was just me being polite again. I walked over to the train and noted that it looked straight out of a little girls coloring book. It also didn’t match with the dark grey and white of the mountains and snow but given this train was bound for ponyville i’m sure it would look more in place their. Giving a stray look back I called out as the door was closing. “Have a good day bit.” Expecting that to really confuse him I was instead taking aback when he smiled and responded back.
“I almost thought you forgot my name princess” he said with a light smile.
The end of his sentence was slightly muddled by the train door closing. I suppress my laughter just long enough for my train car to pull out of the station, and then promptly started dying that my half logic of think up a pun worked. I would say I see this becoming a trend but I know I would eventually repeat a pun and it wouldn’t be nearly as funny in the moment. After finally composing myself I looked around the train car and found I was it's only occupant. Fine by me, the less ponies I run into the less likely I am to get attacked for being an imposer.
I took a seat and found they were sized perfectly for a pony. (Go figure) Once again I looked through my backpack and wondered what else was with me. After feeling around for another few minutes I was interested to find my Ipod. I know, who carries an Ipod with them in 2019. But this had some of my favorite music on it including playlists made for me by my mom, dad, and grandparents. As far as I was concerned having my Ipod was enough of an excuse to try out these hooves and see how they work.
It took me a bit of time but I finally got the headphones in and the Ipod turned on. The hard part of my hoof was no good against the touch screen but the tender under hoof was (with conflict) able to unlock my Ipod. From there it was as simple as voice commands.
“Ipod, shuffle my entire music playlist” and just like that the music started pouring into my ears. The first song was a bit ominous but hey, maybe the universe was trying to tell me something. And if this song is anything to go by, and it sure does feel like it right now, destiny is proving to be absent from my life. With the shuffled playlist underway I found myself drifting off the sleep.
https://soundcloud.com/ryanjohnson-3/lullaby-of-a-dead-man
Author's Note
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Did you like it? Let me know.
Did you hate it? Let me know.
Did you see every grammar mistake? Yah that happens a lot with me.
An to my actual gf who said she would spell check and dipped out after seeing it was a "pony story" I still love you.
