John Sampson's Story

by Bernard

Rating: mature
Tags: Adventure, Sex, Profanity, Violence, Princess Celestia, Human, Main 6, Romance, Princess Luna, Drama, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 143792

A man and his horse find their destiny in Equestria

A simple cross country trip on horseback turns into something beyond John Sampson's wildest dreams when he suddenly finds himself in a very different world. Making a new home for himself and his horse is going to be quite a challenge.

Published 2019-07-03 14:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-07-03 14:30:01 UTC

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter One )

There was a report of a bright flash and a loud bang in the middle of a clear night near the Everfree Forest. It was probably no more than heat lightning but it had to be investigated. The weather Pegasus for the area was tasked to check during morning patrol and report back if any fire or damage was evident. She described a large burnt circle with what looked like an impact crater in the center. Since there was no fire burning, it was written off as a meteor strike and reported up the line for a possible scientific investigation. No meteorite was ever found and everypony eventually got tired of looking.

Life went on with the usual zigs and zags that only Equestria can provide. Strange and dangerous creatures wandered out of the Everfree and were either chased back in or dispatched. But one report kept popping up without any resolution. A giant, strangely colored Earth pony with two heads and tentacles was glimpsed by many but never confirmed or caught. Then somepony found the manticore carcass. It wasn’t that something had killed a manticore, a respectable feat in itself, it was that the bones were fresh and had no meat on them. Whatever it was had eaten the manticore.

A full squad of Royal Guard was dispatched with orders find whatever was behind this mystery. They found huge, deep hoofprints confirming the giant pony rumor. And they also found strange tracks like oddly shaped boot prints. There were other signs and a few trails but every time they tried follow one it ended in the same small river flowing out of the woods. Sergeant Swift Trail is an experienced tracker so she ordered the squad to divide and make their way carefully up both sides of the river into the forest.

A few thousand yards later the ponies on one side of the river ran into rock, not a sheer cliff but far more vertical than anypony would want to scale without Pegasus help. So they crossed back over and continued up the river with the rest of the squad. Shortly, they come upon a clearing in the woods. The river ran down the face of the rocks on the far side of the clearing but that isn’t what grabbed the sergeant’s attention. This is not a natural clearing. Stumps of trees that formerly filled the space are evident. This is somepony’s made hiding place.

With practiced ease the squad spread out around the rim of the clearing finding concealment within the woods, weapons at the ready. Then the sergeant sees him. Under a large lean to against the rock at the back of the clearing is the biggest Earth pony that she has ever seen. The roof of the lean to is planted with grass explaining why none of the Pegasi had ever seen him. This pony is no idiot and he is looking directly at Sergeant Swift Trail. Suddenly the pony looks to his right and grunts softly. The only thing there is a small hill but a voice answers, “Yeah, I see them too.”

There’s more than one of them! The sergeant’s job is suddenly much more complicated than she had imagined. The voice rang out much louder this time, “If you want to be friends step out into the open with empty hands.” This confuses the sergeant but she knows that a full squad of Royal Guard doesn’t need to back down from anypony. So she steps out into full view with the aim of asserting her military authority. There is a loud crack like a sonic boom and a rock two yards to her left shatters, spraying chips at her.

The sergeant’s day just keeps getting worse. There must be a Unicorn of incredible strength somewhere around here to not only throw a spell like that but to also escape detection by any of the squad’s Unicorns. The sergeant carefully removes her weapons and armor, setting them on ground behind her. As she turns to do so, she signals to the Pegasus in the woods behind her to report the situation to their unit’s captain and await orders.

The voice rang out again “Thank you sergeant, now come on out to the middle of the clearing. Tell your men to take it easy while we wait for your report to work its way through CoC. You and I will get comfortable and see if we can find some common ground.”

Then the sergeant’s day took the absolute strangest turn of all. As she approaches the center of the clearing a tall, multicolored biped emerges from a hidden hole in the hill and passes by the Earth pony on its way to the center of the clearing. It is wearing a belt with pouches of some kind and a floppy hat. The strange creature stops a couple yards short of where the sergeant stands and folds its legs until it rests on the ground.

It speaks calmly “I assume that since you have understood everything I have said that your ranking and language have some commonality with mine. My name is John Sampson but you can call me John for convenience. And you are . . .?”

This is a decision way above a sergeant’s pay grade but the brass are hours away at best so practicality wins out. “I’m Sergeant Swift Trail of the Royal Guard. There are many more Guardponies hidden in the woods around here so I would suggest that you make no sudden or threatening moves. Who is the Earth pony with you?”

This seems to require some thought from the creature. “He’s not a pony, at fifteen hands he’s a full horse, a Paint stallion. His true name doesn’t translate to anything verbal but we have agreed to use Fred for simplicity’s sake when talking. I’m a man, a male human, and we are life partners of a sort. What are you?”

Now it was the sergeant’s turn to wonder, “I’m an Earth pony. Where are you from that you could possibly miss knowing that?”

An unmistakable sadness passes over the creature as it replies, “I know that we are very far from home but I don’t have the first clue in what direction. I have known for a couple of years that this moment must come, that I would have to make contact with your government, but I had hoped to do so with less drama. By the way, Fred isn’t verbal. He will not listen to anything that you say but he will fight to the death if he gets the idea that you are trying to harm me and I will do no less for him.”

This makes the sergeant a little happier. It is something she understands. And if this strange creature could bond with an equine, there was hope that it could understand pony society. But there are important questions remaining. “Are there any more of you? Neither of you look like a Unicorn yet somepony threw one hell of a spell at me when I first stepped out.”

A small chuckle escapes John as he replies, “I will answer you honestly that the two of us are all there are but I will reserve a few secrets until we have more trust. It is also supremely important that none of your people tamper with any of our belongings. We have ‘magics’ that none of your people will recognize or understand. An accidental triggering could result in death.”

Was that a sincere concern or a veiled threat. The sergeant had no way to know short of a truth spell but would a truth spell even work on a being this foreign? There was nothing to do but carry on. “Does your species have Tribes and if so what are they?”

John grins, “We (both of us) have lots of variations in size, attitude, and color within our two species but nothing structural. I’ve already mentioned ‘Paint horse’. His kind are called that because they look like someone started with a basic white horse then threw buckets of horse color paint at them. That’s actually pretty close to the real genetic explanation. I’m a fairly normal human of European decent, kinda athletic and a little more intelligent than average. Now how about you? What are ‘Tribes’ and what do they do?”

“That explains the unusual color of his coat.” the sergeant nodded, “Most of the ponies you meet will belong to one of three Tribes. Unicorns have a horn and do magic. Pegusi have wings and fly. Earth ponies have great strength. There some other species in other parts of this world but you will see little but these three Tribes around here.

As the day wore on the two veterans developed an easy respect for each other. It seems their worlds differed more in the detail and less in the basics than they had first imagined. Then there was a soft pop behind the sergeant. John tensed, “Swift Trail, I thought you said horn or wings?”

The sergeant snapped to attention but said softly “John, this means that my report has gone all the way to the top. I never expected that. Be calm and respectful. The Princesses are nothing if they are not fair.”

John stands and bows slowly toward the newly arrived purple pony when a ton of invisible rocks seems to land on him. He hears hooves thundering behind him and knows trouble will be here in seconds. A half ton of pissed off horse is coming at full speed.

Twilight has to do something fast. It takes a lot of concentration to seize the horse and control his built up momentum without harming him. The distraction gives John a chance to wiggle the Beretta out of its holster and aim it at the Princess while keeping it concealed behind his body. “Sergeant, in honor of the fact that she hasn’t hurt Fred, you have ten seconds to prove this is just a misunderstanding before ponies begin to die.”

“Princess! Ma’am!” the sergeant shouted, “Please release them NOW! We were talking about asylum when you arrived. They have magic that I’ve never seen before and he thinks the Everfree is a pleasant place.”

The young Alicorn turns a lighter shade of lavender but the weight lifts off of them. John rolls a bit getting up so he can ease the Beretta back into its holster without being noticed. As he makes it to his feet, Fred comes up and checks him over. “At ease Fred. Go get yourself some food and water while I straighten this out.” With a quick nuzzle to John’s cheek, Fred turns and walks back toward the river.

In her best military voice the sergeant announces, “Princess Twilight Sparkle, this is John Sampson, a Man unsure of his way home. The Horse is Fred, bonded companion to John. Fred doesn’t seem to communicate with anypony but John. John, this is Princess Twilight Sparkle, one of the Alicorn rulers of Equestria.

Twilight looks up at John with a sheepish grin, “I’m sorry for the misunderstanding. The last report I had is that some monster is holding my ponies captive. I came to rescue them. Tell me truthfully, would you have killed ponies if I hadn’t released you?”

John looks back seriously and answers, “Ma’am, I will not kill without a very good reason. But I consider trying to harm me or mine the best of reasons. If you had harmed Fred, you would have been the first to die.”

This worries Twilight. It isn’t just that he would kill, anypony that won’t defend their family has something wrong with them, it is his complete certainty that he could kill one of the most powerful wizards in Equestria even while restrained. So there is a decision to make. “I can’t just take you to Canterlot to meet Celestia and Luna. You’re too much of a dangerous unknown at this point. On the other hoof, you have spent most of the day with the sergeant here and she seems to hold you in high regard. What would you need to be comfortable while we get to know each other?”

John thinks carefully, “Fred will need enough room to run around and exercise with free choice water and leaf vegetables. I will need much the same but with the addition of fruits, grains, and occasional meat. We will need to sleep together at least a couple of hours a day and have some protection from weather extremes. I wouldn’t expect to roam freely through a city without learning a lot more about your people but neither will we accept caged specimen status. A farm near a town would probably be ideal with guards on the perimeter to keep us in and the curious out. I would like to request Sergeant Swift Trail for our daily liaison. We have a lot to learn about each other and the sergeant seems a more than adequate teacher.”

The Princess addresses the sergeant, “Would you accept this assignment? You and your squad know more about our visitors than anypony else in Equestria at the moment so you are the obvious choice but I can’t just order you to take such a risk. There would, of course, be others coming to learn about them.”

The sergeant nods, “Yes ma’am! As long as any of the troops can opt out later if they must.”

Twilight smiles, “They won’t fail you sergeant. I know that just like I knew you wouldn’t fail me but of course I won’t force anypony.” Turning to the Man, “John, do you have any luggage? I think that you and the Guardponies should hike out toward Ponyville while I go ahead to arrange for your quarters. They can help you with anything you need carried.”

This gets a big grin from John, “Princess, Fred and I are a mobile unit ourselves. We were traveling when whatever this is happened to us so we can easily load up and carry about half of the Guardponies too. This is your world so I’ll let the sergeant set the pace and pick the place.”

The sergeant calculates briefly then asks “John, how soon can you be ready to go? I want to be out of these woods before dark and we have just about enough time to do that right now.”

John replies, “Give me about fifteen minutes. And if you’d like to expand this new found spirit of cooperation, I know a way to get out in about half the time. The only drawback is that a small part of it is crossing water deeper than you are tall.”

Twilight marvels at the way Fred and John seem to move as one to the shelter and dress out for the trip. She doesn’t recognize half of the things John hangs on Fred and himself but they are all obviously well made and well used. Anyway, there are things to arrange and people to notify so she gathers her magic and teleports back to Ponyville.

By the time Sergeant Swift Trail has her squad assembled and ready, John and Fred are walking up with their gear stowed and strapped. “Some day you are going to have to tell me what all of that gear is. Some of it looks damned useful and some of it just looks mysterious,” says the sergeant as she studies the approaching pair.

“The water is shallow and the bottom smooth on this side of the river for several hundred yards. When we get to a road that crosses the river we will have to ford the center channel. The deepest part of the channel is chest deep on me but we can help you cross if needed. The road across the river curves out to the open plain parallel to the river. Once on it we can travel as fast as you want.” John lays out their route.

The sergeant just smiles, “We’ll cross that channel when we get to it. Lead on.” And with a quick wave the sergeant launches the squad’s Pegasi for overwatch. Following John to the river they find a ramp concealed behind a large rock and walk easily down to the water . John and Fred are used to this route and make quick time down the river. The ponies can trust the depth of the water and the firmness of the bottom following Fred so they have no problems keeping up. Then John stops.

Pointing to a small clear area on the far bank John says, “That’s our road. Fred and I can string a rope for you or even tow you across. Will you need to lighten up?”

The sergeant’s smile just gets bigger as she waves and points. The Pegasi drop down in a neat line with a short rope hanging from each. An earthbound pony grabs each rope and is immediately towed across the river. “You’d better get moving if you don’t want to be left behind,” laughs the sergeant.

It actually works out closer to a dead heat because each Pegasi has to make more than one trip. John is laughing as he clambers up the bank, “I bet you guys have done this before. Teach me just how much I have to learn. Sergeant, I’d like you to lead from here and set the pace. I believe that I have enough advantage of stride to outrun the earthbound ponies but if you get ahead I’ll just get Fred’s help and I know you can’t outrun him.”

With mock seriousness the sergeant said, “Have you learned nothing?”

John explains, “One of the names my people give Fred’s kind is ‘Brother of the Wind’. Once we get settled in I will arrange a demonstration. It really looks like he is flying just above the ground when he kicks in high gear.”

They make out to the open fields without further event and as nightfall nears the sergeant calls a halt. She signals the Pegasi in and says, “Thirty minute break. Water and trail rations. Prep for night march.” Turning to John, “The Pegasi don’t like to fly at night because the shadows interfere with their depth perception so they’ll walk now. The Unicorns will cast an enhancement spell on everypony’s night vision but I don’t think we should try it on you or Fred until we know more about you. Can I assign you guides?”

“Don’t worry about us,” John assured the sergeant, “I can see just fine as long as the sky remains clear and even if it doesn’t Fred can see in near total darkness.”

After a few hours of steady march across the grassland, they cut across a road. The column turns and continues down the road towards Ponyville. About twenty minutes later Fred suddenly stops and looks up into the night sky. John rests his hand on Fred’s withers for a few seconds then faces the approaching sergeant. “Something is coming. It’s flying directly at us.”

The sergeant motioned to John, “Come on, you’re about to meet your fourth Tribe.” As they step out ahead of the column a Night Guard lands on the road right in front of them.

“Sergeant Swift Trail?” the courier inquires.

“Right here,” the sergeant answers.

“Your orders are to proceed to the Apple family farm circumventing Ponyville and any occupied dwellings. You will be met near the farm main gate and guided to an empty barn with attached field where you will set up temporary quarters for your ponies and guests.”

The sergeant acknowledges the new orders. Her duty discharged, the Batpony springs into the air and disappears back the way she had come.

Turning back to John, the sergeant said, “Before you ask, that was a Night Guard Batpony. They prefer the dark because they don’t have the plumage on their wings to protect them from direct sunlight and they have no trouble at all flying at night. They are famous for their ability to pass unseen in the dark so I want to know how you could know she was coming.”

“My turn to teach you,” John said, “This is why Fred and I make such a good team. My eyesight is wide spectrum and narrowly focused. Fred’s is narrow spectrum and panoramic focused. He can spot small movements at great distances and I can evaluate and identify whatever he finds. Our link makes sharing the information quick and easy.”

“That’s good to know. We’re going to have to leave the road and skirt the woods soon. The going will be rougher and there is some risk that we might bump into something out of the woods. A little forewarning could be real nice,” The sergeant grinned at John.

Despite the sergeant’s concerns the rest of their march was uneventful and dawn found them resting just outside the gate to the Apple farm.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Two )

Celestia paused and looked intently at me, "Does any of this sound familiar to you, Bud?"

"I . . . I . . . You left part of it out. The part about the pit," Bud stammered.

"Bud, that is all of the official report I was given." Celestia said flatly, "Is there more?"

"We . . . We . . . were walking right next to the forest. Swift Trail was talking with the point pony about the best route when we came out from between some large rocks. As they stepped out past the rocks they just disappeared. I knew they didn't go far because I could hear Swift Trail. She sounded like an old Marine." Bud continued, "We later figured out that somepony had dug a pit trap there and in the dark they just walked right into it. The rest of the squad ran up and quickly divided into watch and rescuers. Both ponies were out of the pit in under a minute. But I couldn't stop laughing. This was the first time I'd seen a pony truly pissed and Swift Trail was the very image of an angry Marine child's doll."

So I grabbed the hatchet off of Fred's pack and volunteered to cut a sapling to leave in the hole as a warning to others. A minute later I was back with the ‘flag’. Swift Trail was cleaning up and I was down to a minor case of the giggles.

I still rated a harsh glare so I apologized, "Sergeant, I'm sorry. I know this isn't a laughing matter but you just triggered a memory from my home and I had to either laugh or cry." There is no way I am gonna stand in front of the squad and tell a veteran NCO that she reminds me of a child's toy! So I offered, "Sergeant, as far as I am concerned this never happened. If everyone else agrees, no word of this incident will ever escape my lips." Swift Trail grinned a little and nodded.

“The rest of our little march went pretty much as you said. I realize now that I just broke my word but I also know that everypony involved is long dead and gone.” There is much confusion in my head. ‘Marine’ is a concept from before Equestria but how can anything be 'before Equestria'? “How can I remember things that happened to this John Sampson?” Bud asked.

Celestia nodded. "We are making progress, Bud. John Sampson is still alive and it is up to us to find him and bring him home. Let’s continue our story."

Just as the sun begins its climb into the heavens, Big Mac opens the front gate to the Apple family farm and ambles out to greet his guests. Twilight had told him to expect two unusual visitors with a Royal Guard escort first thing in the morning and here they are. ‘Unusual’ is an understatement. Big Mac is called ‘Big’ for a good reason but as he approaches this pony he is looking up at the pony’s chest. “Howdy,” he drawls, “Jus’ follow me.” Big Mac turns and takes a few steps but the big pony just stands there. Turning back to the big pony Mac says, “This way.” But the big pony doesn’t move.

Then the other guest comes walking up and speaks, “He doesn’t speak your language but he does appreciate your attention to him. Tell me anything that you want him to know. My name is John and his is Fred.”

Big Mac is impressed again. This Man is nearly as tall as Fred. “Howdy, I’m Big Mac.”

The sergeant trots up just then, “And I’m Sergeant Swift Trail.” The sergeant quickly forms a column with herself, John, and Big Mac in the lead followed by Fred and the squad. They march past the main house and some storage barns, over the hill and past several planted fields, finally coming to a solitary barn.

“This barn and hay fields are yours for as long as you need them.” Big Mac turns and heads back to his chores.

“Doesn’t say much, does he?” John observes.

“That was probably his longest speech of the month,” the sergeant replies. “Let’s see what we have to work with here. The Princess can send or make anything so we need so start a list.”

“Let’s talk while we walk,” John said. “Big Mac is the first pony that I’ve got a good look at. All the Guard are in uniform and the Princess was just too distracting during the few minutes she was around. He seems to have a solid body color with a contrasting mane and tail. Do all of you follow that pattern?”

“With a few notable exceptions, like Zebras, yes,” the sergeant replied.

“Then your pattern of gray green body with red and gold striped mane and tail make absolute sense to me,” John declared. “And your name is perfectly descriptive. Are ponies generally so appropriately styled?”

“It’s part of our magic, John,” the sergeant explains. “Do you see that mark on my flank? That’s my cutie mark. Mine is a trail disappearing towards the horizon with a wind blowing down it. That’s my name and my talent which makes me perfect for Guard duty. We get them when we come of age. Can I assume that you don’t have one? And why do you stay covered up all the time?”

“No, I don’t,” John replied. “And I wear clothes because about seventy five percent of the hair on my body is what you can see on my head. Naked skin is too sensitive to both heat and cold so protection is needed. When we have a comfortable indoor place arranged I will wear a lot less.”

This got the sergeant’s attention. “I’m looking forward to that and I want a closer look at those hands some day. I wonder just what you can do with them.”

John just smiles from ear to ear, “Be very careful what you wish for sergeant.”

"How are you doing, Bud?" Celestia inquired.

"I remember Swift Trail. She was my first and best friend in Equestria. She taught me more about what it means to be a pony than all of the learned scholars put together. . . . How is she these days?"

"Welcome back, John. I'm glad to see you again," Celestia smiles. "I am afraid that Swift Trail has gone on from this world. We made our pact a little over four hundred years ago."

Nooo. . . .

“John, did you understand what I said," Celestia asked carefully.

"Your Majesty, I don't think he's here right now," ventured Bud. "Can you tell me how he got in my head?"

"Bud, philosophers could make a life's work out of trying to determine who is in whose head. I don't think it matters because neither of you is complete without the other. As to how you both got there, that's what this story is about. I was hoping that John could help me tell it. After all, he's the one that lived it." And with that, Celestia settles back to continue the story.

Before lunch ponies began arriving from town. They brought tables, chairs, food lockers, food, kitchenware, tableware, bedding, and all the things it takes to make our own little Guard base in the barn. Construction ponies put a private room for John and Fred on one end of the barn and barracks for the soldiers on the other end.

Princess Twilight shows up just after lunch with Spike and plenty of parchment. She finds Fred grazing out in the pasture as John leans against a nearby tree. The sergeant has sent them out here so the townsponies can get some work done instead of just staring at them.

Twilight hails John, “There you are. Can we talk for a few minutes? I have so many questions and so few answers.”

“Certainly,” John replied, “though I’m not sure how many answers I’ll have.”

Twilight pulls out a list and starts from the top, “Where did you come from?”

“I came from a trail through the Big Thicket in East Texas, one of the United States on the planet Terra in the Milky Way Galaxy,” John answers.

Spike carefully records his answer.

“Where did you find yourself in Equestria?”

“I don’t know. I came to rather hazily on bare dirt in darkness with Fred nosing me. I smelled smoke so when he wanted me to get up and move it seemed like a good idea. When the sun came up, we were in the woods not far from where Sergeant Swift found me.”

“When was that?”

“According to my phone it was June fourth two years ago. Today is July second.”

“What happened to send you here?”

“I don’t have the first clue.”

“Has this ever happened to you or anypony that you know of before?”

“No.”

“Do you know how to return to your home?”

“I suspect that this is my home now because I know absolutely nothing about how I got here much less how to get back.”

“. . . . . . Celestia?”

“John! How are you?” The Princess looks hopeful.

“I’m confused. Did you say ‘four hundred years’?”

“Four hundred and twenty two altogether, John. You knew that was a possibility.” Celestia watches John carefully.

“I remember that day. Twilight had so many questions. Every time I thought she had run out she would produce another page. So I decided to ask some questions of my own.”

“Princess, slow down for a minute please,” John interrupted. “Surely I get a few questions of my own.”

“Uh . . .Okay,” she answered.

“Who and what is the little scaly green and purple guy? He’s obviously not a pony.”

Twilight looks briefly puzzled, “That’s Spike. He’s a baby Dragon and my number one assistant.”

John smiles and turns toward Spike. “Hello, Spike. Pleased to meet you.”

Spiked grins sheepishly, “Thank you, John. Don’t mind Twi. She gets kinda obsessive whenever she finds something new and you are the biggest ‘new thing’ she’s seen in a while. She’ll come back down to earth once she thinks she has you properly catalogued.”

Turning back to Twilight, John says, “Princess, I need to know something about ponies so my answers can have proper context. For example, I haven't seen any sign at all of anything electrical. Do you understand and use electricity? Without that context things like the phone I mentioned earlier won’t mean much to you.”

Twilight sighs, “Of course we understand electricity, John. The Pegasi have complete control of the weather including lightning.”

“What else do you do with electricity?” John asks.

“Well, lightning can make a powerful weapon. But it’s really too destructive to use it around ponies all the time. There are some minor uses like lighting but it isn’t real common.”

“O. K. Show and tell time Princess.” John reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone. “I was planning to take some pictures but this will be even more useful. This a Centipede Model 61 smartphone. It’s booting for the next few seconds.”

“Oh! Is that a picture of Fred?” Twilight exclaims. “That’s a very fine picture.”

“Yes it is. But that’s just decoration. If I touch one of the little icons, it can do things for me. The calculator, for example, can perform any mathematical operation that you can imagine. It can play music or store millions of pictures. But the best part, the part that will only work when I am on Terra, is that it will connect to a global network. I can use this network to see and/or speak to anyone anywhere as long as they have a phone too. And I can search the collected knowledge of mankind for answers to any question. That’s every book, magazine, paper, show, whatever that is recorded anywhere.”

“Uh. . . Princess?” No response. “Princess Twilight? Are you okay?” John pleads with Spike, “Can you help? I think I broke her.”

The Princess is frozen with eyes wide and wings straight up staring at John’s hand. Spike waves a claw in front of her eyes but she doesn’t blink. “John, maybe you should go somewhere else for a little while. I’ll take care of her.”

As John ducks behind the barn he runs into Swift Trail complete with the biggest grin he has ever seen on a pony. “Oh, John,” she giggles, “You’re in for it now!”

“Swift! Why is it funny that I’m in trouble for hurting the Princess?”

That set off a fit of full laughter from Swift Trail. “Oh My! You don’t know. John, the Princess isn’t hurt, she’s in heat.”

“What the hell are you talking about!!”

“The wings, John, it’s the wings. When a winged pony is ready to mate their wings stick straight up to get them out of the way. It's a reflex. The Pegusi call it a ‘wing boner’. You should know about royal privilege too. She’s a Princess so she can simply command any unattached stallion to service her and he can’t refuse. No pony would refuse anyway. It’s a great privilege.”

“NO NO NO NO ! ! !”

“Why not, John? You check a lot of boxes. Big. Strong. Intelligent. Exotic. Once you get into pony society you are going to have more mares than you know what to do with.”

“Swift, please, there’s something you don’t know about this. It isn’t me that set her off.”

“Who else was there? It couldn’t be Spike, he’s way too young. And Fred was fifty yards away. Who’s left?”

“It was my phone!” John moans. “I was showing her my smartphone when she locked up.”

“What in the bloody blue blazes is a ‘smartphone’ and how would it do that to her?”

“This is a smartphone,” John demonstrated, pulling it out of his pocket. “I was explaining to her how Terra was covered by a global network that let me use this phone to search every library on the planet for the answer to any question when she just froze.”

“Please, tell me you didn’t.” As Swift Trail began to giggle uncontrollably. The giggling degenerated to laughter which accelerated until Swift Trail was rolling on the ground completely out of control.

“What’s so damned funny?”

“Oh, John. I’m sorry but it’s just too funny. Princess Twilight Sparkle has a major book fetish. She spends all of her spare time cataloging her personal library and researching arcane subjects. And you just walk up and show her the ultimate library. And she has a major wing boner for it!” Swift Trail broke down with uncontrolled laughter again.

Several minutes later: “John, it would probably be better if you didn’t tell anypony about this. Twilight Sparkle is a nice mare and doesn’t have a mean bone in her body but it still isn’t wise to offend an Alicorn.”

Celestia said through intermittent giggles, “Oh, John. You did manage to get yourself into some situations, didn’t you. Is Bud in there with you?”

“I don’t feel alone but I can’t give you anything more specific than that. She doesn’t answer when called.”

“John, it will help if you believe that Bud can see and hear you. A simple wanting to share goes a long way to making it happen. And it works the same from Bud’s direction,” Celestia instructed.

“You did this! Can’t you just undo it?” John pleaded.

“Of course I could. And who knows, you might even emerge from the madness at least somewhat functional. Think of yourself and Bud as two buckets half full of water. If you were to try to mix the two buckets by throwing the water from both up in the air at the same time and trying to catch it in one bucket, there would be a big mess. So we are carefully pouring the water from bucket to bucket a little at a time until it is properly mixed and we have one full, happy bucket.” Celestia explained.

“So I guess we continue with the story. Who goes next?” John wondered.

“They’re your memories so why don’t you just see how many you can find?” Celestia suggested.

Twilight Sparkle has disappeared, probably teleporting out to avoid facing any embarrassing questions. I’ve spent an hour out in the pasture sitting watch while Fred sleeps. He’s been kinda paranoid since we arrived in Equestria and needs my physical presence to relax. I left him doing his nighttime grazing and went to the barn to get some dinner myself. It is shaping up to be a warm summer night so I change into my cargo shorts and nothing else. After throwing a small assortment of fruits and veggies on a plate I head for a table.

Standing across the table from Swift Trail, “Mind if I sit here sergeant?”

She looks up, blinks, and says, “Please do. Give me a few minutes to finish off this report and we can talk.

A few scribbles and a shuffle later she looks up and, “What do want to know?’

“I understand horses well and know what estrus looks like but I didn’t see any signs from Twilight. So what happened out there?”

“John, with ponies there’s estrus and there’s heat, related but not the same. In the spring every mare in Equestria that’s not too young or too old experiences estrus at roughly the same time. At that time we are fertile and it’s accompanied by an extremely powerful heat. Getting bred and pregnant is all a mare can think about. Throughout the rest of the year a mare can be brought into heat by any sufficiently exciting situation. Usually that means a strong stallion and some foreplay but the trigger is an individual thing. A mare will not be fertile any time other than spring. Now I want to know, how does human estrus work?”

“You’re going to love this Swift. Humans are permanently in heat. Women are fertile for several days of a twenty eight day cycle that goes on year round. The timing is individual so we just want sex any time we can get it. But I have some big questions that need answers too.”

“In Equestria big questions always involve magic. I’m an Earth pony so I’m not the best one to ask about magic. You already have the ear of the best expert on magic in all of Equestria. Why don’t you just ask Princess Twilight. If you are worried about this afternoon, don’t. It’s something that happens to mares though usually not just like that.”

“Swift, tell me honestly, would it happen to you? Ignore the bookworm trigger, would you lock up like that in the presence of a stranger.?”

“Of course not, John. I’m a disciplined military mare and have my emotions under full control.”

“And that is exactly the answer that I expected and exactly why I trust you and don’t trust Twilight. Sergeant Swift Trail is mature and experienced with full comprehension of the world and how it works at the level where we all spend most of our time. Princess Twilight Sparkle is a little girl with a big weapon living a dream. I give her the best of intentions and complete sincerity, but she still has the ability to do enormous damage by accident.”

“I’m flattered. I mean really flattered. A career NCO doesn’t expect to be preferred over a Princess. But, John, I work for Twilight Sparkle. She’s one of the ‘Royal’ that I ‘Guard’. I cannot act in any way against her interest nor can I hide anything from her.”

“Again the answer I expected and desired. If you were willing to violate your oath for someone you met a few days ago you wouldn’t be someone that I could trust. If humans had visited Equestria, if there was a human nation anywhere around Equestria, ponies, including high government officials, wouldn’t be asking questions like I’m being asked. So It looks like I’m going to be an immigrant.”

The next morning I am rousted out at the first hint of dawn, as usual, to sit sleep watch for Fred. He is a little grumpy with a belly full of fresh green grass but I can’t blame him. I am having the same problem with lockers full of the finest produce staring at me whenever I’m in the barn. I bring Fred some carrots and promise him more if he will take it easy on the grass.

When I get back to the common area in the barn the day shift guards are already gone and the night shift is in the middle of their dinner. I get a plate, fill it, and sit myself in a corner a little way from the ponies. I have some serious thinking to do.

“You look halfway home.”

“Huh?” I look up to find Swift Trail standing on the other side of my table. “Please sit. I want to talk to you. ‘halfway home’?”

“It’s military slang. It means a pony who is looking at where she wants to be instead of where she is, usually after a long hard campaign. And sitting at a half eaten meal not moving completes the picture.”

“Swift, I believe that you are my friend . . .”

“John I told you last . . .”

“Let me finish. I am fully aware that you have a duty and an oath to uphold. I accept that. I believe that if your duty required you to harm me that you would do it and cry later. I accept that. And I believe that until that duty comes up you will do your honest best to help me.”

“John, ‘friend’ has a special meaning among ponies. It’s not a commitment that a warrior can just make. You seem to understand that so I will accept your friendship in a conditional sense. Does that help?”

“It does. I want you to know that I will be eternally in your debt for what I am going to do to you but I don’t see any other way. I want what is right for Equestria so there is a decision to be made. It should be a warrior’s decision, not a politician’s.”

“John, you’re scaring me.”

“Good. If I don’t terrify you before this is over you’re not the warrior I think you are.”

We never got to see just how far that line of thought would go because Twilight Sparkle came walking in with a mare that I’d never seen before but I’d bet I know who she is related to. Swift Trail rises and offers to take my plate as Twilight approaches.

“John Sampson, this is Applejack. She is one of the owners of this farm and a good friend of mine. She has agreed to sit in with us today,” Twilight introduces Applejack.

“I’m pleased to meet you Applejack. And I’ll bet it was your brother that I met (briefly) yesterday.”

“Ah believe so. ‘specially because ‘briefly’ just sounds like Big Mac. Twi tells me you came from a very far away place.”

“I honestly don’t know. I have to figure out a direction to look in before I can measure a distance. Let’s just call it ‘a very different place’. By the way, I like that hat. I lost one a lot like it on the way here.”

“Twi, I think I’m gonna like the big stud. John Sampson, we’ll find you a hat.”

The Princess immediately settles in across the table from me. Applejack sits next to her and Spike sits next to me. Then the questions begin.

“Where did you get that ‘smartphone’?”

“I bought it from Oldegg. They put it on OOPS and the driver handed it to me.”

“How do you put lightning in it?”

“I don’t. I use a solar charger to generate a more controllable form of electricity and store it in a battery until I need to recharge the phone.”

“What else can the smartphone do?”

“Princess, remember that ‘context’ thing I mentioned yesterday? Well you just slammed head first into it. Associated with that phone is something called ‘the Store’. When I visit the Store with my phone I can purchase ‘Apps’. ‘Apps’ enable the phone to do a particular thing or kind of things. Even if I could remember them all, there’s many thousands. It would take days to list them.”

“Name a few.”

“Okay. I’ve already mentioned voice, text, net access, recorded music, pictures, and video. There’s also Wastebook, Fapchat, and millions of games. And if you’re feeling frisky, about a dozen search engines.”

I didn’t know it is possible to turn that color. I guess when you start with lavender it is. And I immediately felt like a fool. “Dammit, Princess. I’m sorry. I just wish you would listen to me. I know equines well. I have some basis towards understanding ponies. You don’t have the first clue about humans. You can’t possibly know what to ask and fumbling around trying to get lucky is going to take years.”

Applejack has sat silently just looking directly at me through this whole thing. Now she turns to Twilight. “Tell him.”

Twilight looks troubled. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, AJ.”

“Tell him or I will. He ain’t spoken a single false word to you including his apology and here you are trying to deceive him. I can’t abide it”

“AJ, I don’t think . . .”

But AJ cut her off. Looking directly at me, “John Sampson, I’m the Bearer o’ the Element o’ Honesty. It ain’t possible to lie to me. Now tell Twi what you want her to know.”

“I’m planning to stay in Equestria even if I find a way ‘home’. I like it better here because humans are overrunning Terra. It’s becoming hard to find open land or even room for horses. And I want to become a good citizen and find ways to help ponies.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Three )

Spike is grinning as only a dragon can grin. Twilight looks like somepony parted her mane with a baseball bat. And Applejack is just looking straight at me with no waver at all.

“John, there’s more to it.” It’s a flat statement.

This wakes Twilight up, “See, I told you so!”

“You asked me here ‘cause you can’t handle him. Let me do it.” And those eyes haven’t twitched yet.

“Applejack, I’m sorry for the trouble I’m causing but you have to trust me for at least some of this. Humans on Terra have taken a different, uglier path than equines here or there. I don’t want ponies to make any of those mistakes. So please let me choose which questions I answer and which I ignore. After I understand ponies properly we might have this conversation again.”

“I trust ya John Sampson. I don’t know if you are makin’ the right choice but I can see how hard you’re workin’ to make it.”

And now the tough one. I’m not sure I want to but I may never get another chance this good. “Twilight, I have no idea how long ponies live or what their life cycle is like, BUT, to my eyes you look to be just barely not a child. Your recent emotional overreactions confirm that. Are you ready to spend days and weeks in close quarters with a stallion that I have been told ‘checks a lot of boxes’ for Equestrian mares?”

Damned, there’s that color again. No mercy. Well, maybe a little.

“Twilight, one of the reasons I feel this way is how much you remind me of me . . . a long time ago. Sergeant Swift Trail is very much a contemporary to the current me. You just interrupted a more fruitful conversation between us than you and I have ever had. Get reports from her or assign someone to follow us around and take notes. Then you can read the notes and learn about humans in a way that lets you cross reference and codify and I can learn about ponies in a way efficient for me. Soon enough we’ll be ready for the serious questions.”

Applejack has a big smile, “Twi, he’s not only honest, he’s smart.”

Twilight does not look happy but there was too much logic and good sense on the table to argue. “I’m going to have to research and think about this. Until I say different, keep on with what you’ve been doing.” And out the door she goes with Spike running to keep up.

Applejack just smiles and beams, “Twi means well but we’re all still waitin’ for her to figure out stallions. On the other hand, if you ever get tired of the military life and decide to settle down, I’d appreciate your first date.” She went out the same door as Twilight but in a whole different way.

“That was quite a show.” Swift Trail has eased up behind me. “I’ll bet you anything that ‘research’ means she’s going to go ask Princess Celestia. Celestia is the senior alicorn, Twilight is the youngest. I wouldn’t be surprised if we get a royal summons shortly.”

“Well shit. I guess you’d better line me up on royal protocol.”

“It’s easy, John. She wants polite and She wants honest. And She hates wasting time. She’s already had more than a thousand years of pompous fools so the less like them you are, the better.”

“Dammit! The more I learn about Equestria, the more I like it. Hey! I promised you a demonstration. And I want to learn some things for myself. I’ve got the time now, how about you?”

“You mean with Fred?”

“Yep. And bring a Pegasus that feels like racing.”

Swift Trail looks around, “Windy. You up for a race?”

A very blue pony with frost white mane and tail walks over, “Who do I have to beat?”

“John, this is North Wind. She’s a courier specialist. Windy, you’re going to race Fred.”

“Fred? The big horse guy? How can that be a race?”

“John, it’s your idea.”

“I don’t have any idea how fast a normal Pegasus can fly, but I know that Fred is far faster than any ground pony. So I want a chance to clock him against something normal to Equestria. And it will give us something to talk about later.”

By the time we make it out to the pasture most of the off duty ponies are following us. Fred is grazing nearby so I call him.

Fred!

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“Fred, ready for that race we discussed?”

“Okay. This is North Wind. She’s going to try to keep up with you. When I call ‘go’ both of you make three rounds around the pasture staying clear of trees and fences. Line up right here. Understand?”

North Wind nods.

So they line up side by side pointed at the far corner of the field.

“Ready. . . Go!”

Fred launches into a medium gallop with a five yard jump. Windy snaps wings and takes off after Fred but is forty yards behind by the time she gets up to speed. The Pegasus is gaining but not by a lot. Windy has closed half of the distance by the time they get to first turn at the back of the pasture but the turn gives Fred a chance to see her. So Fred stretches out a little more and starts gaining the ground back.

By the time they make it back to the starting line both contestants have upped the pace a couple of times. Fred is digging in hard to make his corners nearly square and Windy is losing ground trying to match him but Windy gains it back on the straightaways. The second lap goes much like the first. Both of them are sweating and obviously putting a lot of effort into the race.

“Fred is enjoying himself immensely.”

As they start on the final straightaway from the back of the pasture Windy pulls out her reserves. When they make the final turn she is passing Fred. Fred looks up at Windy and kicks in his own reserve. They cross the finish line in a dead heat moving so fast that no one gets a clear enough look to call it.

“Come here Fred. Let’s walk around for a minute and cool down.”

We walk back and forth by Windy a few times and Fred shakes himself. Then curiosity gets the better of me. “Windy, how fast do you think the two of you were going?”

Windy replies, “It’s hard to put a good number to it in a confined area like this but flying this hard in a straight line at altitude I could beat the train or anypony but a Wonderbolt to Canterlot. I would never have believed that anypony could travel that fast on the ground.”

“Swift, that’s one of those things that I want to talk about. Fred wasn’t half that fast before we got to Equestria. We didn’t have the direct link either. We seem to be gaining magic.”

“Celestia, I’m getting tired and we need to take care of our body. So can you please put us up somewhere? I’m going to try to turn it over to Bud. Bud, Celestia will find us a room and dinner for tonight. Just do what she says and don’t worry.”

“Bud? Are you awake, Bud?” Celestia looked concerned.

“I’m here, Your Majesty.”

“How are you feeling, Bud?”

“I’m very confused, Your Majesty.”

“You don’t have to be formal with me, Bud. We are old friends. I’m going to put you up in the palace tonight. There will be somepony to get you anything you need or take you to any place you want to go. We will resume the story whenever you are ready.”

I never saw how she summoned them but suddenly there are two guards by the door where I came in.

“Please take this mare to one of the ambassadorial suites and see to it that she has everything she needs for tonight,” Celestia instructed.

“Ma’am . . .” And down two halls, up the stairs, and down another hall we go until they stop on either side of a large door, opening it in front of me. There were two fillies and a mare waiting inside.

“Welcome Ma’am. We will be your servants for tonight,” the mare said. “I’m Haute Cuisine, your chef. This is Seafoam (seafoam colored, of course), your bath maid. And Tender Breezes, your chambermaid.”

“Please draw a warm bath for me,” nodding at Seafoam. “And have dinner ready when I finish my bath,” nodding at Haute Cuisine. “Afterwards I will want privacy.”

“Yes Ma’am!”

The only thing better than a deep soak in a warm bath is a deep soak in a warm bath with somepony scrubbing your back and all the other hard to reach places. Dinner is magnificent but rather small by farm standards. But that isn’t really a problem because the lockers contain every kind of fruit and veggie that I could imagine. I think Tender is disappointed that I don’t want to cuddle.

It is early but the day started early so I go straight to bed. Early is farm normal anyway. When I wake it is still full dark outside. I grab a snack from the kitchen and go to the window. The courtyard below is as busy as though it's midday. That gives me an idea. I never made it into the throne room so I have never seen what a Royal Court looks like.

When I open the door to the hall, the two guards are still there. Both snap to attention.

“Milady! How may we help you?”

“I have heard that Princess Luna holds court at night much as Princess Celestia does during the day. Is this so?”

“Yes it is Milady”

“And might this court be in session right now?”

“It is Milady.”

“Could I watch it as a spectator?”

“Certainly, Milady.”

“Take me there.”

We retrace most of yesterday’s journey but stop short of the big doors choosing instead a small plain door on a short side hall. We are in an alcove behind a tapestry with a scattering of comfortable looking seats along the wall past the end of the tapestry. I could hear some kind of debate going on out in the room.

“Just take any seat, Milady. We’ll be right here when you’re ready to leave.”

“Thank you.”

It wasn’t until I was settled into my seat that realized just how big this room is. My big barn would fit in here with room to spare all around. About halfway down the wall to my left is a large throne on a raised dais. On the throne is dark blue Alicorn obviously related to Princess Celestia. There are two ponies, Earth ponies by the look of them, standing in front of her both gesturing wildly and trying to shout over the other.

Princess Luna glances at me and smiles a little. “Quiet! Thou were told before thou walked in that door that thou must maintain order and decorum. Thou hast failed. Leave Me!”

As the two Earth ponies sprint for the door Princess Luna turns to the guard beside her throne, “Be there any more petitioners?”

“No, Your Highness. We saved those two for last.”

“Good. We have better things to do.”

Princess Luna steps down off the dais and starts toward me, “Bud, come walk with me.”

We meet at a door in the back wall. Through it is garden with benches and stone statues.

“It’s a beautiful night, is it not, young lady?”

“Yes, it is. And it’s part of a day filled with many wonders, Your Majesty”

“Thou hast a fine outlook, Bud. Wouldst thou like to speak with John Sampson?”

“Yes! I have many questions for him.”

“Seat thyself in a comfortable way and close thine eyes.”

It seemed like only seconds after I had closed my eyes when I found myself on a flat gray plain. The tall, dark blue Alicorn stood beside me.

“Hello, Bud”

“Hello, Princess Luna.”

A very tall (taller than Princess Luna!) creature steps out from beside Princess Luna. It walks on two legs like a Minotaur but the legs are long and slender.

“Thank you, my Friend Luna. Hello Bud.”

I recognize that voice. It is John.

“Thou are most welcome John Sampson. We art eternally in thy debt. I will take mine leave now. Thou will awaken normally in the fullness of time. Enjoy each others’ company ‘til then. My Guards wilt watch over thou and keep thou safe.”

“Yes, Bud, this is what we looked like when we first arrived in Equestria.”

“We! I was in that body?”

“Bud, we’re still in that body. It’s just changed a little.”

“So why don’t I remember it?.”

“We were one then. After we had been in Equestria for a while we split into a human mind and an Equestrian mind to go with our changed Equestrian body. I hid for a time after that.”

“Why on Equestria would we do anything like that?”

“Bud, we did it because the alternatives were so incredibly terrible. Second best was a quick death for us and those we love.”

“Ma’am. . . . Ma’am . . . Please wake up Ma’am.”

“Huh? . . Okay, I’m awake.”

“Her Majesty Princess Celestia is waiting for you, Ma’am.”

“Oh shit!” I jump up and land squarely on my nose.

Then I realize, I’m John in Bud’s body. I get carefully to my feet and take a step. Crash!

BUD! I need help, Bud. Celestia is waiting for us and every time I try to take a step on four legs I face plant.

“Ma’am? Are you alright Ma’am?”

I get to my feet and look around. We’re still in the garden behind the throne room. Turning to the guard, “Lead on.”

Back into the throne room and across the floor to the far wall from the spectator seats where we open a small door. A short hall to the right and another small door finds us in the same private office where the most exciting day of my life happened.

“Hello Bud. Make yourself comfortable. How are you and John getting along this morning?” Princess Celestia was behind the same desk looking just as regal as yesterday.

“Princess Luna helped us last night. We can talk and swap control at will now.”

“You sounds better, Bud. And you trust John. That’s very good. May I talk to John now?”

“Celestia, John here.”

“How are we feeling, John?”

“I’m wondering how many friends I have left. Bud is still getting over the shock of discovering that her goddess is a pony.”

“You have a lot of friends left, John. Did you notice the throne on your way in?”

“Yes I did. Purple? Does that mean what I think it means?”

“If you think it means that Twilight is holding Court today while I coddle you, you are correct. She has grown a lot since the last time you spoke to her.”

“Oh! Celestia, could you do us a big favor, please? Send somepony to the farm and let everypony know that Bud is on a special assignment for you and check on Fred while they are there.”

“I will do that but you can put your mind at ease about Fred right now. He hasn’t needed your help for a lot of years now. Luna has been monitoring him regularly.”

“Really? Luna is taking an interest in Fred?”

“Let’s get to work, John. Give me a strong memory.”

“I know just the one. We’ll call this ‘the shower scene’.”

There is exactly one community shower in the barracks because that is just how the military does it throughout the universes. I use it just like everypony else but I try to pick times when no pony wants to use it because I have to modify things a little to accommodate my vertical orientation.

There is no door on it so there isn’t much about me that is a mystery to any of the ponies but they seem to prefer a little distance. I have heard a few mutterings about humans being in a permanent state of heat and ‘don’t turn your back on him’. The target of most of those is the youngest of the ponies. I don’t know what his name is because everypony just calls him ‘Colt’. He has a light charcoal colored coat with a blond and red striped mane and tail. His talent is getting into places without magic or wings. He can climb and jump in ways amazing for an Earth pony.

I am sitting in the common area one afternoon, having just sent off a learned professor of herd psychology. I have given him an earful of Terran equine herd dynamics so he can write the definitive paper on the influence of magic on Equestrian herd psychology. There is a commotion outside and Colt comes running through the door in a serious state of panic. “Where are the Unicorns? I need a Unicorn!”

I explain to him that all of the Unicorns have gone to town for some Unicorn community thing and won’t be back until dark. That makes things worse. Then the smell hit me. I know that smell.

I whip out the command voice, “STOP!” It works. “Where did you get that smell?”

Colt moans, “It’s horrible. The monster laid a spell on me!”

Trying not to giggle I ask, “Was this monster short, kinda round, and black with white stripe running down its back and long bushy tail?” We are beginning to draw a crowd.

Colt is looking at me like I’d just grown a horn, “You know this monster?”

The other ponies are beginning to gently drift out the door so I fire up the command voice again. “NO PONY LEAVES. I need a small bucket of baking soda right now.”

Military reflex is fun to watch. “We don’t have any here, sir”

“You have wings don’t you? Who do you know that does tons of baking right up the road? Now Go Get It!.”

Swift has this squad well trained. The two Pegusi went out the door high and low in full flight.

“Colt! Bring your butt in the shower and try not to touch anything.”

I pull my shorts and t-shirt off and drop them at the door. Turning on the cold water I begin to lather poor Colt up. “The name of that monster is ‘Skunk’. Whatever you do, never, ever look under his tail. That’s where the evil smell originates. Now where did he get you?”

“He got me square on my right side, sir. But I tried to roll and rub it off.”

“And that just spread it.”

“Yes, sir.”

By then a couple of his buddies have braved the smell and entered the shower. I told them, “Stay back out of splash range. This stuff comes off of skin a lot easier than it comes out of fur. I’ll scrub him down.” That generates two world class looks of relief.

I’ve just got him soaped up good for the second time when a Pegasus comes flying in (literally) with a small pail. The baking soda! As I take it she says, “Fly Boy is coming with a much bigger bucket. I came ahead with a small one to get back ASAP.”

The big bucket got there before the little bucket ran out and I settle into a lather, soda, rinse and repeat cycle. Everypony else gets comfortable in the common room and waits for the results.

I notice that Colt is shaking. “I guess we have most of it off by now. I can warm the water up a little if you are cold.”

“I’m not cold, sir.”

“Then why are you shaking, Colt?”

“I’m frightened, sir.”

“Of the smell? It’s not permanent. Of discipline? Learning about woods critters the hard way is part of being a city boy in the country. There’s no chance you’ll ever make this mistake again.”

“No, sir. I’m afraid of you.”

“Why on Equestria would you have any reason to fear me?” I’m really puzzled now.

“Are you going to mount me, sir?”

“What blazing pit of hell did you drag that idea out of?”

“They said that humans are always in heat and will screw anything they can catch and you have me pretty much caught right now, sir.”

“Let me guess. ‘They’ are all mares.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Child, the stallion portion of your education is seriously lacking. I’m going to let you in on some small secrets. First, mares will always try to play with your mind. You have something they want, something they can’t live without. So they want to keep you bluffed and under control. Don’t fall for it. Play with the fun ones, love the good ones, and ignore the rest.”

“But sir, you walk around half erect all the time so you can be ready to go instantly.”

“That’s what these mares believe?”

“That’s what everypony believes, sir. You did say yourself that humans are always in heat.”

“Colt, how many times have you come in heat?”

“Stallions don’t have heats, sir.”

“Neither do men.”

“Oh . . . . sir.”

“And now I’m going to let you in on a human secret. Humans don’t have retractor muscles. At all. That means humans don’t have a sheath either. This is my normal not erect state. It’s another side effect of the vertical lifestyle like nipples on the chest.”

“You mean that humans don’t rape their mares?”

“A few do. There are bad humans just like there are bad ponies. The important part is they are few and far between. Most humans fall in love, get married, and raise families just like most ponies.”

“I’m sorry, sir”

“For what? Letting some old biddy mares fool you? Don’t worry about that. Let’s get dried off and see if we can live with ourselves.”

It has always fascinated me how Earth ponies can do ordinary things so well without hands or magic of any kind (maybe it’s a hidden kind of magic). Colt just grabs a towel off the shelf with his mouth and tosses it to me then grabs another one and throws it over his back. A quick roll and rub later he’s dry and I’m still working on the awkward spots.

“Hey, Colt. I’ve got a plan. You wanna ‘educate’ some mares?”

“Whatever you say, sir.”

“Are they in the common room right now?”

“Some of them, sir.”

“Okay. Let’s go get something to eat and you sit down as close as you can to them while leaving a place across the table for me. I’ll do the work, you just nod your head and have a normal conversation with me.”

I grab my shorts and shirt as we go out the door and cross to my room to throw them in. Then I line up behind Colt at the food lockers. Putting fruit, bread, and cheese on a plate, I watch him settle at a table right in the middle of a gang of mares. I walk up to the chair opposite him and ask, “Mind if I sit here?”

“Not at all, sir.”

“You know that you don’t have to ‘sir’ me? I suspect that after a two and a half year absence, I can be considered at least retired.”

“Sir, some officers demand it. You deserve it. So I’m going to continue to use it unless you order me otherwise.”

Smart boy. “Thank you, Colt. I’ll try to earn that respect. I do kinda wish you hadn’t figured it out though. Now I have a problem.”

About then Swift Trail lands in the seat next to mine, “John, what have you done to my squad?”

“We had a small crisis. Colt here found out why you never look under the skunk’s tail and the Unicorns haven’t got back from town yet.”

“I believe that much because I can still smell it.”

“Well I couldn’t just sit around and watch Earth ponies try deal with it when I had two perfectly functional hands so I organized a cleanup. You understand that Terra has skunks and no magic too.”

“And I guess that’s why I just thanked Granny Smith for the emergency loan of a bucket of baking soda?”

“What can I say? Everypony was running around looking for help so the old training just kicked in and I handled it.”

“You still haven’t explained why you never told me that you were an officer.”

“That’s a different service and different universe away. The habits don’t make a chain of command. But it’s probably better that way. I just found out that some unknown pony or ponies has been using me for a boogie man. If I were in the chain of command and found out that a service member was disrespecting a superior officer like that I might have to take action for the good of the service.”

“Only if I didn’t beat you to it.” Swift Trail slowly surveyed the room. Several mares suddenly found absolutely anything else interesting.

“I also discovered that a lesson in comparative anatomy is needed. It’s a little bit vulgar so I’m not going to rub anypony’s nose in it, I’m just going to lay it on the table for anypony that might benefit from it.”

I stand up and stretch as big and wide as I can while turning slowly around. “Everypony take a good hard look. This is me, a normal male human. You know what you don’t see? A sheath. A sheath isn’t compatible with a vertical spine. So just hanging is my normal state. That’s why I wear pants any time I go outside. I can’t retract my penis.”

I walk calmly over to my room past some thoughtful looks and grins. The same three mares are positively radiating ‘NOT ME’. After putting on my shorts and shirt I go out the main door and head towards the pasture for Fred and some serious introspection on how a small misunderstanding can have big consequences.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Four )

“John, John, John. Of course I got an official report on that incident but all that drama gets filtered out before it gets to me.”

“Celestia, that ‘drama’ turned out to be one of the best things I ever did. Ponies opened up to me after that.

“But there’s more to the story. Let’s continue.”

Fred is slowly grazing his way to his sleeping spot but he looks to have some time to go before he gets here so I sit down to wait. In just a few minutes Swift Trail comes striding up.

“John, I want to thank you for taking care of Colt like that. He’s had a hard time being both the newbie and a colt in a mare’s world. His life just got a whole bunch easier with a stallion officer to look up to.

“And speaking of that, just what is your rank?”

“I was a Chief Officer in the Fire Service. That complicates things for the military mind. When you reach that level we are interchangeable parts. I might be a clerk at one incident and commander at the next.”

“Should I salute you?”

“Fire Services don’t salute or make big deal of rank except for public ceremonies. We’re more about certifications and qualifications.”

I am saved from further confusing Swift by the arrival of Fred. He walks to his sleeping spot and settles in for his nap.

“That’s interesting. He’s gone sound asleep right in front of us. He trusts you. That means you can stand watch for him. Let me know if you start hearing him.”

“I can hear him right now. He’s snoring lightly.”

“No, I mean directly. He doesn’t have a verbal center in his brain so he doesn’t think in words and logic like we do. But he does surprisingly well with images and concepts. For example, his true name is a concept of his identity, a picture of Fred and his personality. I have it in my mind but I can’t transfer an image of his personality to you with words. So we agreed to label it ‘Fred’ for convenience. He doesn’t understand letters and words but he can recognize them and remember that this particular combination is his.

“Just now he was quite amused to find you here with a strong subtext of approval. I don’t have the first clue why but the feeling is unmistakable. Even more confusing, his feelings affect mine directly and vice versa. Sometimes the divide between his mind and mine isn’t clear, especially when strong emotions are involved.”

“But, John, surely humans and horses have had many years to work these things out. You said your two kinds have been partnered for millennia.”

“We have. There are whole breeds of horses and schools of humans that exist specifically to bond the horse and human as thoroughly as possible. But those all involve physical means. Information is transferred by touch, sound, or sight. This is different. I will be sound asleep in the morning and he will call me to come out and watch while he sleeps. I will awaken and rush out.

“Do you remember when we first met and Twilight nearly ruined it all? Even though I was pinned down facing away I knew that Fred was being carefully handled. I could feel what was happening to him as though it was my own body. That has only happened since we got to Equestria.

“Which is one of those ‘Great Questions’ that I have been wanting to ask; do Equestrians of any species or relationship have this kind of connection?”

“When strong magic is involved, anything is possible, John. You’ve already seen the Elements in action. Princess Luna can enter and control any dream. And a few Unicorns can enter your thoughts to heal or verify things for you. But these are all specific situations, not a continuing relationship. This is a question that you are going to have to ask a magic expert someday. If you can’t trust Twilight, when you have been accepted into Equestria you can petition the Princesses directly yourself.

“Now I have a question for you. You said that you should terrify me. What do you mean by that?”

“Humans have a kind of strength that Equestrians have never needed. What you saw in the common room just now is an example. Suppose that Twilight had been sitting there instead of me when Colt came running in the door. She would have just wiggled her horn and the problem would have been solved. That was exactly what Colt was looking for. When there was no Unicorn, everything broke down. The pony response was ‘FIND A UNICORN!’. The human response was ‘Skunk smell is sulfur based. What is available that neutralizes sulfur? Make a plan to acquire and apply it.’

“In the Fire Service I was a wildland specialist. Without magic, wings, weather control, or anything but my wits and knowledge I regularly faced and defeated a foe measured in thousands of yards. Think of what I could do as a two eyed man in the land of the blind ponies if I chose to do ill.”

“I think you are underestimating ponies, John. We have lived for thousands of years our way and overcome many obstacles. I think we will survive one human.”

“Swift, my friend, I pray that I am underestimating ponies. And that one human doesn’t get lost in the solution best for ponies.”

“Now, John, I want to hear about ‘a foe measured in thousands of yards’.”

We swap war stories for the next hour and change. I found out that Swift Trail and her squad are what I would consider Special Forces and have seen some action against Changelings and Diamond Dogs besides the occasional monster patrol. I couldn’t put a finger on it but I got a strong feeling that there was something that she wanted to say but couldn’t.

<! Happy. Approval.> And Fred stands up, stretches, and drifts out towards the pasture for his night graze.

“Well, Fred is happy and approves of something but didn’t offer a clue what.” So I stand and we start back to the barn and dinner.

“John, I would like to ask a very personal favor of you. You don’t have to do it and I don’t want you to if it steps on any human taboos.”

“Swift, even if I didn’t consider you a friend, I owe you for some of the things you have done for me. Don’t worry about my comfort or convenience.”

“Do you remember, John, when I told you that ‘friend’ has a special meaning for ponies? Well I want to be friends in the pony sense. For all of your strange ways you are closer to me now anypony has been in a long time. I like you.”

“Tell me very carefully what is expected of me. The last thing I want to do is hurt you by not understanding something peculiar to ponies.”

“The only thing that would change is the favor that I want of you. I want to sleep with you in your room.”

“Swift, we need to make one thing crystal clear first. ‘Sleep with you’ is a euphemism for sex among humans. I would be thrilled and honored if that is what you mean but it isn’t required. We just sleep on beds most of the time.”

“All I want right now is a good night's sleep. I admire the way you watch over Fred and protect him. You have surely noticed by now that I am the only pony here that sleeps alone? Sleeping alone is not natural for us but I have my reasons. If this works out and we are happy with each other, I will teach you the ways of pony courtship and who knows where it will end. But for tonight I just want to be in the same room with you.”

“Consider it done. Now what’s for dinner?”

Dinner is a treat, veggie stew and bread. Afterwards is something else. Suddenly everypony has questions. The amazing part is that they seem more fascinated with my service and rank than my species. I think I scared Colt, I told him how many school and training hours it takes to qualify for Chief. Swift has retreated to her office to write up the day’s report so I stick my head in and say, “I’m turning in. Come when you are ready.”

“I won’t be long.”

So I go to my (our?) room, get undressed, and stretch out on the big pad. I doze lightly for some unknown time when Swift enters with a small pad and lays it against the back wall. She settles down and I go back to sleep.

Something wakes me. It is the dead of night and just a little light is shining in from the common room. Then I hear a thump. It is coming from the back wall. I hear rustling and grunting. It is Swift Trail. I ease to my hands and knees and crawl to her. She is having a doozy of a nightmare. Suddenly I have understanding.

So I lean against the wall next to her head and gently stroke her cheek. After a few minutes her breathing changes and she says, “John?”

“Yes. I’m here. You were having quite a dream.”

“Oh. I’m sorry I woke you. I guess this isn’t going to work.”

“Wrong! I know what’s going on now. I’ve fought this battle myself, still fight it every now and then. And I know beyond knowing that you can’t win it by yourself. Come with me.”

I carefully pick her up and take her to the center of the big pad then I lay down behind her.

“John, what are you doing?’

“Listen to me carefully Swift Trail. Here and now and for however long you may need or want me I will stand between you and all who may seek to harm you. Be they of this world or any other I will keep them from reaching you.”

“John, I . . . .”

I reach out and pull her back against my chest with her head under my chin wrapping her up completely. Then the tension slowly drains out of her and she falls into a calm sleep. I follow her in a few seconds.

I am in the common area but the light looks strange. There was a large dark blue Unicorn sitting across from me. “Hello?”

“Hello, John Sampson.”

Then I notice the wings. “You must be Luna and this must be a dream.”

“Thou art correct John Sampson.”

“What can I do for you?”

“I have wanted to meet thee for some time but thy dreams were too alien for me. We have some common ground now. I wish to thank thee for healing Swift Trail. She has been a trial for me these few years now. She is a very good mare and will make thee happy for years to come.”

“Now you are confusing me. Do you have foresight?”

“No, but I have knowledge. Thou have just passed thy test for citizenship in Equestria. Thou hast declared unconditional love for a pony.”

When I wake in the morning the sun is already up. Swift Trail is gently rubbing her cheek against mine still wrapped up in my arms.

“Oh my. I think we overslept. But damn, it feels good. I wonder why Fred didn’t wake me?”

“John, do you think that we might have some breakfast before it is all gone?”

“Certainly. I fact I think that’s an excellent idea.”

“Then why don’t you release me so we can get up and walk to the common room?”

“Oh! I’m sorry. You just fit so well right there.”

I unwrap myself from Swift and rise to my feet. As I draw on my shorts and shirt Swift goes to her small bag near the pad she started the night on and dons her chevrons.

“You might as well move in here and leave the small room to be nothing but an office.”

“You are probably right, John, but let’s see what the day brings first.”

It looks like every single Guardpony from both shifts is sitting in the common room watching the door to my (our) room. As we step out they all rise and begin to stomp. I start looking around for a place to run.

“Calm down, John. That’s applause. They know what you have done for me and they are grateful.”

“There’s really no way to hide anything from a pony, is there?”

“Why would you want to hide anything so wonderful?”

“I don’t but I do want the pleasure of telling somepony and bragging about it.”

And she laughs. It is a small thing but oh so wonderful to behold.

Then the classic pony sense of timing kicks in as a strange Pegasus walks in the main door.

“Who are Sergeant Swift Trail and Chief John Sampson?”

We step forward and the courier gives us each an ornate scroll sealed with wax and bearing the emblem of a sun. “You are hereby summoned to appear before the Royal Court at your earliest convenience.” And she turns and walks back out the door.

Swift opens her scroll and reads. “We need to catch the next train for Canterlot. Aren’t you going to read yours?”

“I haven’t learned to read Equestrian yet. But I know what it says. My application for citizenship has been accepted.”

“That’s wonderful, John. But let’s be sure there’s nothing else.”

She unrolls the scroll and reads for a few seconds. “You are right, John. The Royal Court is going to accept your Oath of Citizenship. But there is more. you are going to be offered some sort of special appointment to the Royal Guard.”

“Wow. Just. Wow.”

“Hello. John? Grab whatever you need for a couple of days and a Royal Audience. We’ll eat on the way.”

“I’ll just grab my ‘go bag’. I doubt it’s all I need but it is all I have. Why don’t you put together a food basket while I go tell Fred what is going on.

And out the door I go at a full run. Fred is waiting right around the corner of the barn.

“Damned, Fred, that was a speech. Thank you for this morning.”

“Okay. Try not to confuse the nice ponies too much. I’ll be back as soon as possible.” And I sprint for the barn door.

We rush down to the station and get there just in time to see the morning train disappearing into the distance. No problem, our tickets are good for any train. And now I have a few hours to see my first pony town.

Ponies tend to see me first (I wonder if sticking up about twice as far from the road has anything to do with that?) and get big eyed and excited. Then they spot Swift in her full Guard uniform and calm down. We take a pretty good loop around town with Swift pointing out various stores and restaurants. I have no idea why ponies need signs, everything looks like what it is.

We have nibbled out of our food basket on the way into town but the plan is to have a full meal in the park and be back at the station in plenty of time for the afternoon train. We settle on a bench in the park with the food between us when I discover why the words ‘pony’ and ‘plan’ should never be used in the same sentence.

We have drawn a small parade as we pass through town, mostly wide eyed foals too fascinated to stop looking and too afraid to come closer. This is different. It starts as a bright pink streak zigzagging across the park. Swift says, “John, let me do the talking” By the time she has said that, there is a small pink pony bouncing in place in front of us.

“Hi there!You must be the new guy!I know you’re new because I’ve never seen anypony like you!I’m Pinkie!What’s your name?I’m going to throw you the best ‘welcome to Ponyville’ party ever!Everypony will”

“No, Pinkie,” Swift quietly said.

“be there!We’ll have cakes and ice”

“No Pinkie,” A little louder.

“cream and presents and fire”

“NO, PINKIE,” Full force.

“crackers and music”

My turn “NO PINKIE!” in full command voice.

“. . . . .”

Swift jumped in, “We are on or way to a Royal Audience, Pinkie. Do you want us to tell Princess Celestia that we were delayed by your party?”

“no” And it is like somepony had let all the air out her. She stops bouncing and just sags.”

I can’t let that stand, “Pinkie, we will come back to Ponyville and I will be honored to attend your party then.” Besides, I need some good public relations.

The air rushes back in and she starts vibrating, “Oh!I’ve got to start planning right now!This will give me time to get City Hall or a stadium booked!You.Promise.To.Be.There?”

“I’m sorry Pinkie but I can’t promise anything right now. The Princess has a job for us and I don’t have any idea when I’ll be where until She tells me. But I will let you know as soon as I know.”

“Okee Dokee!I’ll be waiting.” And a pink streak disappears into the distance.

“I’m impressed, John. Very few ponies can handle Pinkie that well. Right now we need to get to the station.”

So we pack up our mostly uneaten picnic and hit the road.

There isn’t much left of the day by the time we get to the Castle gate so I venture, “I guess we missed today’s Court. Is there a place to stay overnight?”

“We need to check in right here at this gate. We may go to Princess Luna’s Night Court or they may direct us to our rooms.”

“Lead on. This is your home territory.”

The guard at the check in makes a mistake. He glances at Swift’s uniform and says, “You know where the barracks are.” Then he looks at me, “And your business is. . . sir?”

“NO!” Swift is at full bristle. “He is Chief John Sampson, here to see Princess Celestia and I am Sergeant Swift Trail, his official escort by order of the Princess Herself.” And she throws the scrolls down on desk in front of him.

He doesn’t get a chance to read them. At the sound of my name two ponies lounging against the back wall of the office jump up and rush around the desk. One of them says, “We’re here to escort you to your rooms, sir. After you are settled in, Princess Luna requests your presence at an informal Night Court.”

I’m not going anywhere in that place without a guide. We go up, down, and up again. I swear we made five right turns in a row. But we end up at a large ornate door that opens into a suite well worth the trip. The leader of our escort says, “We’ll be right here when you’re ready to go to Night Court.” Then they take station on either side of the door.

I walk through until I see what I want. “Swift, this looks just like a shower to me and I’m going to use it.” I drop my bag on the bench just outside of it and start stripping. It takes a few seconds to decode the pony oriented controls but there are a limited number of things that can be done with water valves. I am getting lathered up when I feel a pressure against my leg.

“This will go much faster if you help me, John.”

“Of course. What are friends for?” I start between her ears and lather down her mane massaging the soap in as I go and pushing it down her neck and across her withers. The pattern continues until I have lathered her tail then I go back up and started under her chin working her neck, chest, and down her front legs in that order. From there I got across her belly and when I got to her teats I very gently separate them and ran a finger into the crevice between them. She is trembling a little but she spreads her legs to give me full access. Finally I go back up to her flanks and worked down her hind legs. She raises her tail and I carefully wash under her dock. She gasps as I ran the flat of my hand down her most sensitive parts.

Then we do it all over again with the shower hose. She is panting a little by the time she is thoroughly rinsed. “John, I love you and I have to tell you that as perfect gentlestallion and without taking any liberties at all you have just made me feel better than full on sex with a lot of stallions. Spring isn’t that far away and if you haven’t committed by then I’m not going to leave you a choice.”

“Full disclosure: I’ve already promised Applejack at least one date.”

“Not a problem. She’d make a damned good bandmare while we are off on Royal business and Fred already likes the farm. I have a strong suspicion that you could handle both of us easily.”

We towel off then I get dressed in my faded cammies while Swift puts on a fresh uniform. Yep, they are waiting for us as promised. This trip is much shorter, down the hall, around one corner and to the really big doors with dark blue Guards beside them. They open the doors and we walk in. Luna is seated on a large midnight blue throne floating about a ream of paper in front of a worried looking Unicorn.

She looks up and smiles at us then shoves the paper to the Unicorn who immediately beat a hasty retreat out the door. Stepping down from the throne she says, “Come with me. We will find a comfortable place for talk.”

We go through a small door behind the throne and out into a garden under the full moon. Luna gestures to a ring of low benches and we all choose one.

Luna starts off with, “We art here to assure that thou art prepared for the morning’s official Court. John Sampson, Celestia wishes that thy write thine own oath. She wilt judge thou on the quality of it. Swift Trail will wear her uniform. Dost thou have formal attire, John Sampson?”

“What you see right here is as close as I can get. I had packed for a trip through the woods, going on three years ago.”

“Can I borrow these clothes? I can have them duplicated by morning.”

“Sure. What else?”

“That should be enough. Thou will have enough to get thy oath ready by morning.”

Then I felt a faint tingling like electricity on my body and realized that my clothes are leaving me.

“Wait a minute!”

“Yes, John Sampson?”

“I thought somepony would come for the clothes after I have changed.”

“Why waste the time? It has been reported to me that thou walks naked like ponies sometimes. Is this inaccurate?”

“But in the Royal Palace?”

“How much am I wearing, John Sampson?”

“Point made. Go ahead.”

So I walk back through the Throne Room, around the waiting dignitaries, down the halls and create the myth that humans are naturally bright red in color.

Back in the suite I make my second mistake of the night. I get out a notebook and ballpoint pen and start working on my oath. Swift comes over to look at my work and gasps, “John Sampson, you have been holding out on me! I’m forced to write endless reports with quill and inkwell while you have this wonderful instrument just laying in your bag.”

“Swift, it’s not that simple. A ballpoint pen won’t work on the rough brown paper you use. It needs glazed paper like this notebook and I don’t have much of that left.”

She goes away mad. After about thirty minutes I have what I want and am ready for bed.

“Swift, what do you think about this?”

Nothing.

“Swift?”

Nothing. So I went looking.

She is on the bed, curled up, sound asleep. I just stand there in the door for a minute thinking just how much this is worth the effort. I turn the lights in the living room down to about half then turn the bedroom lights off. Enough light makes it through the open door to navigate by. I settle down behind Swift in the big spoon. When she feels me there she snuggles back against me and rubs her cheek on my chest without waking. Yes, this is worth all the effort and much more.

I wake as Swift begins to stir. We both stretch and rise to go see what the day will bring. We have a fully stocked kitchen but I settle for oatmeal and fruit, twice. Swift sneaked out with the first one.

There are some neatly folded clothes in various colors on the table in the living room. I choose the Navy blue pants with pearl shirt. I review my oath and I am ready.

“Swift, are you ready?”

“I’ve been ready, John. But we have to wait to be summoned.”

“Okay. Have I told you how wonderful it is to have you around keeping me out of trouble?”

“Not today. Have I told you how wonderful it is to feel love and friendship again after so long without?”

At that moment there is a knock on the door. Swift opens it to find four Guardponies waiting. “Sergeant, we’re here to escort you to the Throne Room.”

Down the hall and up to the big doors we go, two in front and two behind. The scene, when the doors are opened, couldn’t be more different. The Throne room is packed. It is standing room only from wall to wall. Ponies of every size and color are standing, quietly waiting. We walk up a clear lane in the center of the room and stand before three empty thrones.

Three Alicorns approach from my right. When they reach the thrones Luna seats herself on the leftmost, Twilight on the right and the big off white Alicorn (Celestia!) in the middle. Swift kicks me so I close my mouth and bow deeply.

The voice from heaven speaks, “We are told that you wish to become a citizen of Equestria, John Sampson. We will hear your oath.”

Deep breath. “I, John Sampson, do swear by all that is good and holy that I give my full and unconditional allegiance to the ponies of Equestria, that I will serve them as best as I am able, and that I absolutely and entirely renounce all allegiance and fidelity to any other state or people.”

“That is a mighty Oath, John Sampson. Do you take this Oath freely and without reservation?”

“I do, Your Majesty.”

“Very well. We accept your Oath.”

A ripple seems to pass through the room. Behind it everything is just a little clearer and brighter.

“Thank you, Your Majesty.”

“Now, John Sampson, what are we going to do with you? Do you have any suggestions?”

“Your Majesty, I think that there must be some long and very private discussions before that decision can be made.”

“I believe that is wise, John Sampson. But you need a place to live and food to eat while these matters are weighed. Princess Twilight has been supporting you as a ward but that has ended when your full citizenship began. I am told that you have some military experience. Would you consider a commission in the Royal Guard?”

“Your Majesty, I was a Chief Officer in the Fire Service. The Fire Service stands between the Armed Services and civilian authority in nature. I had a limited authority over members of the Armed Forces but wasn’t fully part of them.”

“What rank did this ‘limited authority translate to?”

“When I was working with military personnel, I was considered a Major.”

“John Sampson, would you accept a commission to the rank of Major with My Royal Guard including all of the privileges and duties thereto?”

“Only with the proviso that I am a Specialist and not normally in the primary Chain of Command.”

“Again you impress me with your wisdom. It is done, Major John Sampson.”

“Sergeant Swift Trail, Major John needs an aide and guide. You have served exemplary as his guide up until now but he no longer needs a squad to watch him. You are hereby detached from your current assignment reassigned as Major John’s aide. Concurrent with your new assignment you are promoted to the rank of Captain. Stand forward Captain Swift Trail.”

Something floats up from beside the throne and toward us. Swift’s chevrons float off of her and over in front of me. I reach out and take them as Captain’s bars float into place on her.

“You are dismissed, my ponies. You will be contacted in your current quarters as details are worked out. Thank you for your service.”

The three Alicorns stand with Celestia and Luna walking back the way they had come and Twilight moving to meet us.

“Congratulations, Major. What do you think of Equestria now?” Twilight smiled.

“I spend my days drifting from amazement to confusion and back again. I had not realized that you were actually supporting me. I want to thank you for that.”

Swift spoke up, “Princess, he met Pinkie on the way here and emerged unscathed.”

Twilight’s eyes widened, “Really? John, did she tell you how rare that is?”

“I still owe her a party. We have to notify her when we are returning to Ponyville so she can organize it.”

Twilight laughed at that, “John, Pinkie is exempt from normal laws and rules. She will meet you at the station no matter when you arrive or if you notify her. But if you made a promise, even implied, keep it or suffer the consequences.

“Are you ready to answer my questions now?”

“I was thinking of you earlier when I said ‘long private discussions’. But I believe a lot of ponies are curious about Equestria’s newest citizen and I have an entire life and career to organize. At the least I should find the Guard headquarters and say hello. So can the questions wait a day or so?”

“Of course, Major. I can summon you any time I want.” But Twilight is grinning from ear to ear as she speaks it. “Now go mingle.”

As soon as Twilight steps back about half of Equestria surges forward. Most of them just want to be seen with the hottest new thing in Canterlot but a few are interesting. Swift did a yoepony’s job as a buffer. Eventually my stomach reminds me that lunch time has come and gone. So I ask Swift, “where can we get some food besides the kitchen in our room?”

“Do you feel up to visiting the Guard Barracks? Since we are assigned to Princess Celestia’s Guard directly, the castle is our station. We need to report in and get ID and such worked out. And there is a cafeteria.”

“Lead on.”

It isn’t simple or direct but we make our way out the main door and find our escort waiting for us. They snap to attention and Swift orders them to take us to the CO’s office. We turn the other way when we get to the hall our room is on. And we march farther and farther back into the castle. The architecture changes, becoming more utilitarian and I begin to see Guardponies moving around. Finally we stop in front of an office door. There was lettering next to it but that doesn’t help me. Swift dismisses our escort and opens the door.

Inside is a nondescript unicorn behind what is obviously a clerks desk.

Swift delivers, “Captain Swift Trail and Major John Sampson reporting.”

The clerk turns to the open door beside her and announces, “Captain Swift Trail and Major John Sampson reporting.”

She motions us through. We walk in and Swift faces the sole occupant snapping off a salute. I take the hint and do the same.

A tough looking Unicorn returns salute and looks us over. “So you’re Celestia’s new toys.”

Swift opened her mouth to say something but I beat her to it, “I want to be completely honest with you Colonel.”

“Go ahead.”

“’Major’ was a Brevet rank. I tried not to claim it but it’s hard to say ‘no’ to Princes Celestia. My real rank, that I did claim, was Chief Officer. I made it from raw recruit to the highest rank attainable through achievement and accomplishment. But that’s the Fire Service, not an Armed Service. I fought forces of nature, not armed enemies. The Brevet rank was so I could deploy and command Army units for manpower or special skills in major disasters. I’m nearly clueless on Equestrian Armed Forces but I am NOT a summer soldier.”

“That’s an interesting story, Major. I’m curious why anypony would want to fight with natural forces?”

“On Terra there is no magic, nothing but brains and brawn. Somepony has protect the civilians from fire, storms, earthquakes, etc.”

The Colonel nodded. “Do you have any way to verify any of this?”

“Other than demonstrating some esoteric knowledge, no sir. I just took my Oath of Citizenship this morning. All of my history is in my pocket or on another world.”

“Wait a minute. Major, that was you this morning?” Something has just changed.

Swift spoke up, “I was there, sir. It was him.”

“That was one potent Oath. I think all of Equestria felt it. How do you see yourself fitting into this Service?”

“Colonel, I doubt I’ll ever be anything but a Specialist. I have knowledge that Celestia needs so it is good to keep me well fed and protected. I am quite proficient with some weapons but none of them are available in Equestria. On the other hoof, I have never held a sword in my life. It might be a plan to send me through basic so I can learn some Equestrian ways.”

“Major, now I’m curious what kind of weapons you can be proficient with that would replace a sword.”

“Colonel, Captain Swift Trail is one of the very few Equestrians to have seen one of my weapons in use. Ask her about our first meeting.”

“Go ahead, Captain.”

“My squad was sent to the Everfree on a monster patrol. We tracked him to a clearing deep in the forest. He saw us as soon as we set a perimeter. From a position of concealment nearly a hundred yards across the clearing he ordered me to approach unarmed. I stepped out of the woods with sword still buckled. There was a very loud noise and a rock two yards from me exploded into fragments. I slowly placed my weapons on the ground while signaling one of the Pegasi to report our situation to Command. I believed that I was facing an extremely powerful Unicorn.”

“Have you seen this weapon since, Captain?”

“I don’t know sir. I didn’t see it then but I have since seen many strange metal shapes and materials that I don’t recognize in his possession. It is likely that one of them did it but I don’t know which one.”

“Major, would you demonstrate this weapon for me?”

“When Celestia gives me permission, yes sir.”

“Good answer, Major. We may get along yet.”

The Colonel took a form out of his desk, checks some boxes, signs it and hands it to Swift.

“The Company Clerk will set you up. Take good care of the Major. Dismissed.”

A quick salute and we are out of there. And none too soon. My stomach is beginning to make some noise. We pause in the clerk’s office next door and leave the paper there, receiving a promise that everything will be ready by the time we have finished eating.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Five )

We have made it back to our suite, which we have learned is numbered A3. I have a draw of enough bits to cover some meals and personals. We didn’t figure out what I am going to use as a uniform or armor. I did get a Major’s brassards so I’m not technically out of uniform.

I repack my go bag to be a gym bag and put my brassards in it anticipating an adventure in the morning. Then Swift and I settle down for a lesson in Equestrian military etiquette. The good part is that it isn’t as formal as I feared. I guess I should expect that from any service that has a half dozen different species in it.

Swift has found us an alarm clock so we set it for four AM and turn in early but we don’t go to sleep right away.

“Swift, just how serious were you in the shower?”

“Very. John, mares value strength, both physical and mental, in stallions. You have more of both than I have ever seen. Didn’t you notice how many mares were rubbing flanks with you this morning. You could have covered half of that crowd right then and there if you’d wanted. I don’t want to lose you!”

“Swift, my darling, you can’t. Some stallions value strength in their mares and you are a whole different breed from those social climbers.”

“Then why don’t we do it right now? In Equestria all we have to do is decide to be a band.”

“Because it’s too soon. I just pulled you out of a nightmare world. That has an effect. Your mind is still in recovery. I want a fully happy and self reliant Swift Trail that has checked out all the alternatives and chosen me. I don’t want hero worship.”

“Oh my sweet wonderful human John, there are so many things that you don’t know about ponies. The normal sexual interaction between a mare and a stallion is the headlong rush to orgasm. The heat and pheromones compel us to be that way. The good stallions stick around afterwards for tenderness and friendship. Sometimes they even band. The legend is that for every mare there is a stallion that loves her before the orgasm, that is a friend before a lover. It does happen and when it does, it is a rare and wonderful thing.”

“Swift, you have my absolute word that once we have emerged from this turmoil you will have whatever you ask for.”

And that is enough. . . for now.

“What the fuck is that noise?”

“Remember the alarm clock, John?”

“Well it’s damned sure effective. I’m going to get out of bed just so I can smash it.”

Swift beats me to the alarm clock because I go for the lights first.

“Tea. I need caffeine. I want coffee!”

“John, what’s ‘coffee’?”

“Swift, my darling, coffee is what tea wants to be when it grows up.”

“The water is heating, John. We will have tea soon. Perhaps coffee some day.”

I stagger around the room stretching and waking up. Follow that with toilet, tighty whities, and old favorite cammies. Swift heads for the toilet and about then the kettle pops. So I pour. A couple of cups later I am able to counterfeit life.

We are out the door and down the hall with the goal of reaching the Guard cafeteria by five AM. I am planning to be a regular there because they have something that has been missing from my life lately, meat. This morning I settle for two eggs and toast.

There is a shiny young Corporal sitting at the next table so I decide to start there. “Corporal, can you tell me where to go for PT around here?”

“I’ll be going there myself as soon as I turn this plate in. Why don’t you just follow me, . . ma’am.” He’s spotted Swift’s bars.

About sixty yards down the hall is another of those plain doors with writing next to it. When this door opens into a nice gym I memorize the writing. I set my bag on a bench and look around. A few pushups and jacks later I am ready for some weights. Weights for ponies without hands are just weird but I found some with a handle on top so I start doing squats with one in each hand. I am doing curls with them when I notice I’m getting some strange looks. Then I find a barbell set with a pad that would fit pony withers. I put a few weights on it, set it on my shoulders, and go jogging. It makes a good substitute for a pack. After re-racking the weights I sit on a bench to watch Swift work out with a group of Earth ponies.

The Corporal from breakfast walks up, “Hi. I’m Red Dawn.”

“Hello there. You can call me John.”

“John, do you mind if I ask, just what are you? I mean you’re big but you just juggled those deadpony weights like they were nothing.”

“Deadpony weights?”

“The big balls with a loop on top. Unicorns and Pegasi lift those to train for lifting ponies. They weigh as much as an armored Earth pony.”

“Oh. I’m a human from a world called Terra.”

“Where is that?”

“I honestly don’t know. I was stranded here but I’ve decided I like it.”

“Is that why you decided to join the Guard?”

“Part of it. I was in the Service on Terra so it fit.”

“Have you decided what you are going to do in the Guard?”

“Oh there’s no doubt. I’m a Specialist.”

“What kind of Specialist?”

“Information. My job is to know things. Well, I think my Captain is about done. I’m heading for the showers.”

“Will I see you here tomorrow, John?”

“I don’t know. I plan to, but being new here in all senses, I have a lot of things to figure out.”

I set my bag in the locker room and strip, rolling up my cammies and putting them in the bag. After a good shower I take out a pearl over navy combination like yesterday’s and don it, pulling on my Major’s brassards last.

Corporal Red Dawn is standing right outside the shower room door when Swift and I emerge. I’ll never know if he was waiting or just lucky because he took one look at my insignia and went nearly catatonic.

We stop by the clerk’s office and are given a couple of neat little badges on lanyards and instructed to wear them any time we go out of the castle. I am told that I have an appointment with the Guard Surgeon at my earliest convenience and that we have a lunch date with Princess Twilight Sparkle.

I said that we need to speak with the Colonel. The clerk reaches over and knocks on the small door in the wall. It opens and the Colonel’s voice comes through, “Yes.”

“Major John Sampson and Captain Swift Trail requesting an appointment, sir.”

“Send them in.”

She steps back and we walk through to face the Colonel.

“Major, it has been reported to me that you have been abusing my gym. What should I make of that?”

“Sir, being the only human on the planet, I have to improvise. . . a lot.”

“Do I need to order some larger weights? I can get a Minotaur set.”

“Thank you, sir. But let’s wait a little while and see if I’m going to be around long enough. The Princesses still have some deciding to do.”

“Very well. Now what do you need?”

“Most of my possessions are currently being stored in an isolated barn guarded by a squad. The squad will be recalled soon. I need a secure place to store them. There are things I wouldn’t want casually accessible.”

“Like weapons?”

“Yes, sir.”

“I need to know what I’m going to be storing and just how dangerous it is.”

“Of course. The short form is that most of it is sharp or mildly poisonous. A few things are flammable or explosive on a small scale. None of it would be dangerous to more than one pony at a time.”

“I will examine everything.”

“I expect that. But only under my supervision. And I am relying on you to enforce that provision on everypony else. My weapons are based on technology, not magic. The difference is that anypony can wield them, even by accident.”

“John Sampson, after you left yesterday I got a copy of your oath. I don’t know that I could take on a burden that large. My name is Steel Will. Please use it when we are in private.”

“Thank you. Just ‘John’ works for me. Re that burden, I didn’t choose it. It chose me.”

“I think I know what you mean. And call me ’Steel’. Captain, may I call you ‘Swift’?”

“Of course, sir”

“You may call me ‘Steel’ too and drop the ‘sir’ in private.”

We go back through the clerk’s office and I get a guide to the Surgeon’s office while Swift takes my bag and goes to our suite to relieve the ponies waiting for us there. We are to meet at the door to Twilight’s tower by eleven thirty.

I have found the exception that proves the rule. Doctor’s offices in Equestria are worse than human doctor’s offices. They have the expected paperwork, and then some. All I do is check the boxes and fill in the blanks. But it gets multiplied by organs and limbs that I don’t have. No, I’ve never had hoof rot, or hooves. No, I’ve never had feather mites, or feathers.

As the clock passes eleven I still have some pages to go. So I carry the clipboard back to the administrative nurse and say, “I’ll have to come back and finish this later.”

“NO! You have appointments scheduled. You can’t leave!”

“I have an eleven thirty appointment with a Princess. Do you imagine that you have any ability to stop me?”

“No. sir. We’ll be glad to see you whenever you have time.”

Oh sweet revenge.

My guide and I arrive at the door to Twilight’s tower with several minutes to spare but there is nopony around except for the single Guardpony.

“Sir, are you looking for Captain Swift Trail?”

“Yes. I am.”

“She’s inside with the Princess, sir.” As he opens the door for me.

“Private, thank you for the time. You’re dismissed.” And in I go.

“Hey John. Up here.” It was Spike at the head of a staircase winding up the wall of the tower.

The stair emerges into a large room with tables and bean bag chairs scattered about and shelves of books on the walls. Twilight and Swift were sitting side by side across the room laughing and apparently engaging in perfectly ordinary mare talk.

As I approach Twilight says, “Hello, John. We were just talking about you.”

“Of course you were. There’s no better subject.”

Twilight grins and sticks her tongue out at me. I feel a tear running down my face. And another. It is becoming hard to see so I sit down.

Somepony rushes over to me and touches my shoulder. The voice is Swift, “John! What’s wrong?”

I manage a shaky smile, “Absolutely nothing!”

“John, you’re not making sense,” That one is Twilight.

“I was literally blown out of my world and landed in a dark place with nothing familiar that I wasn’t carrying. I made a place that I could defend and lived for two years in a mud hut on constant watch for monsters that I had thought were mythical. From there I moved to an isolated barn and spent a few months surrounded by soldiers half whom were scared shitless of me. Finally I come here and with literal world shaking force completely sever all possible ties with my old life, old friends, old family, and everything that I have previously known. Then I walk up those stairs and see you two just sitting there laughing and it is so completely ordinary. It’s the first thing that has been ordinary for years and it’s the first time I’ve been completely happy for years."

The next thing I know I’m buried in ponies. Some indefinite time later a voice said, “I’m not going to let lunch ruin while you guys have a hugfest. If you won’t eat it I’ll find somepony that will,” It was Spike.

We slowly untangled. Towels just appear and we all wipe and blow. As we sit back down at the same table I apologize, “Spike, I’m sorry. This stallion has been a bit high strung lately.”

“John!” Twilight positively gushed, “Don’t you realize!”

“Don’t I realize what?”

“This is wonderful. I’ve read about in some very old books but I never expected to see it for myself. John, it’s your citizenship. You are now fully a pony!”

I look, so help me, I look. Hands are still there. “Twilight, what do you mean? I still look and feel human.”

“Not your body, John, your soul. Your identity is pony now. Did you notice that you just referred to yourself as ‘stallion’?”

“So I did. I’ve been drifting more and more into pony idiom for weeks now.”

“But John, you just looked at two ponies and identified as belonging with them. You are one of us fully now. You feel the Power of Friendship. You see being with your friends as a source of pure happiness. That’s the pony way.”

I spend the whole lunch eating mechanically and trying to figure out what this was going to mean. It would certainly change things with Swift. But maybe for the better. It also explained some things about Fred. Time for answers. “Twilight, we need to have some serious conversation. You will want Spike to record this.”

“John, you don’t have to worry. This is a good thing.”

“I know that. There are other things that you don’t know about and I need to tap your knowledge of magical theory. And, Swift, you need to pay attention to this. It bears directly on whether or not you get what you want.

“You ready, Spike?”

Spike nods, Swift gets comfortable, and Twilight looks really worried.

“First, all living beings in Equestria have some magic but not all can manipulate magic outside of their body. Correct?”

“Simple but accurate,” Agreed Twilight.

“Those that can manipulate the magic need an organ to do it with. The more specific the organ the more specific the magic. For example, Pegusi aren’t even close to being able to fly by physical means. They use magic manipulated through their wings.”

“That’s a classic example though I wonder where you heard it.”

“Hold on to that thought. Individuals have specific talents and their personal magic is strongest within these talents.”

“The part about talents is also accurate. That’s what cutie marks are for.”

“Fred has always had speed, strength, and non-verbal communication as his talents. After we arrived here he became several times stronger and faster. And he developed an ability to communicate directly into my mind. I believe that being an equine, he tapped into Equestria and magic almost immediately when we got here.”

“That’s a big jump in logic there. What organ could he be using to focus this magic?”

“What organ does an Earth pony use?”

“An Earth pony’s magic is focused in her hooves and muscles.”

“You mean kinda like a horse that can gallop as fast as a Pegasus flies?”

“I read that report but it seemed obvious that the Pegasus was having an off day or some other random factor has skewed the results.”

Swift speaks up, “Twilight, I was there. That pasture is close to two thousand yards long. He was covering that length in well under a minute. But that’s not the amazing part. He was making square turns at that speed. That’s what messed Windy up. There’s no doubt. That horse has some strong magic.”

“Then we’ll just have to go out there and examine him.”

“Twilight, we have to go out there. We need to bring the rest of my possessions here for safe storage. But there’s no need to wait to perform your examination. It’s happening to me too.”

“John, are you sure?”

“Ask Swift about this morning’s PT.”

“You know what a deadpony ball is, Twilight?”

“I've got a horn, don’t I?”

“He was tossing them around like apples.”

“Are you sure?”

“Colonel Steel Will offered to get him a set Minotaur weights.”

“. . . . “

“Spike, I think I broke her again.”

A slightly red Twilight said, “You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“Nope.”

“John, I want to do a magical examination of you. I will be very careful because you are such an unknown but it should be completely safe. Do I have your permission?”

“Didn’t I come in here to ask you to do it? Yes.”

“Take all of your clothes off and lay down on the floor flat on your back. Try to relax as much as you can. It’s even better if you sleep.”

“Flat on my back, buck naked, at the mercy of two beautiful mares, and she wants me to sleep?”

What I did was practice a little ‘po boy’ Yoga. Looking up when that horn was lightly tracing my face was hard on my nerves but looking up when the horn was on the other end of me was hell on my heart rate. The worst part was that it tickled like static electricity.

“You can sit up now, John. And I wish you would put your clothes back on.”

“You want me to wear clothes?”

“You are distracting me, John, and I don’t want Swift mad at me.”

“Why would Swift be mad at you?”

“Because she has claimed you and any mare that desires you does so at her own risk.”

“She has ‘claimed’ me?”

“Her scent is all over you so deep soap can’t take it off. I’ll bet your scent is on her too, warning other stallions to stay clear.”

“Spike, you can skip recording this part.

“Twilight, In view of what is happening to me, how safe is it for her to share my bed? Especially if I get excited?”

“I think sleeping should perfectly safe. It takes a conscious act to activate the magic. For the rest I would like to run some tests and see if your levels are changing or staying the same. It may be a good idea to hold off on a lot of things until we are sure you are in full control. Foals learning magic are famous for the damage they do and you are much stronger.”

“Okay. Plan. Let’s go get my gear and get it safe. Then I have an appointment with the Guard Surgeon for much medical testing. Why don’t you come along for that and see what turns up?”

“How much does your gear weigh, John?”

“A little more than I do.”

“Then a chariot will do nicely. We can be there and back before dinner. Spike, get them ready.”

“Yes, Ma’am!” And he was gone in green streak.

About an hour later we are lining up for a landing on the road that runs to the barn on the Apple Farm. Fred is running around the pasture kicking up his heels. Several of the squad have come out to see what the noise is.

We are in a rather ornate, extra large chariot pulled by a pair Pegusi Stallions. The Royal Chariot, that is. By the time we roll to a stop near the barn door the entire squad is there, all bowed and silent. Suddenly a loud squeal breaks the silence.

“Major John!” It is Colt.

“Hi Colt. See what happens if you keep your focus and keep working.”

Twilight just grinned at me, “Speaking of things to live down . . . .”

“It won’t work, Twilight. I’m not even a little ashamed of helping a colt in distress.”

Swift is receiving salutes and hoof bumps from the entire squad one at a time.

“Come on, Twilight. You need to meet Fred.”

As we round the barn Fred clears the pasture fence by at least a yard and bounces up in front of us looking for all the world like a half ton Pinkie in Bay and White makeup.

“Hello Fred. Calmly now. You’re scaring a Princess.” Twilight is hiding behind me.

<HAPPY!>

“Yes, Fred, I have a marefriend now.”

<HAPPY!!>

Twilight is peeking out from behind me, “John, I can almost hear him. I can tell it’s coming from him.”

“Good. Now stop trying to listen. It isn’t verbal so trying to hear words won’t work. Just look around and find ideas that are coming from somewhere else. Right now his predominant message is HAPPY!! Oh, and he’s glad I found a marefriend.”

Big Mac comes around the barn, “Howdy, Fred.”

“Uh, John,” Big Mac drawled, “Fred wants ta stay here for awhile. He told me about you turning into a pony.”

“Uh, John, I’ll pay ‘im double pony wages.”

“Big Mac, I’d pay you to let him stay here if it makes him happy.”

<HAPPY!! HAPPY!! HAPPY!!>

“Big Guy, you know you can call me any time. I’ll visit as often as I can anyway.”

“We have a few details to work out first.

“I’m going to load up my gear. I’ll leave your saddle and bags here.”

Twilight couldn’t stand it anymore. “Big Mac, just when did he tell you that John has turned into a pony?”

“Yesterday.”

“Big Mac, don’t ever let him play with Pinkie. The feedback could be earth shattering.” I warn.

I do find out that Big Mac has a plan. He has an old three bottom plow in a storage barn. He never uses it because it takes a team of four. We agree that Fred would have little trouble with it.

“Twilight, lets go get loaded.”

We have to borrow a couple of duffel bags from the squad to replace Fred’s bags. I throw Fred’s saddle and bags on so he can take them up to the main house. As Fred and Big Mac walk up the road Twilight breaks into a giggle fit. Big Mac suddenly isn’t the biggest stallion any more.

I spend most of the trip back speculating whether Twilight or Celestia would think to ask about my other talents first.

We had warned Colonel Steel Will before we left and he is waiting when we return. I had a duffel on each shoulder and am carrying the rest. He leads us to a stone walled room off the hall near his office. There was nothing in it but a couple of tables. I empty both bags and spread the contents on the tables. Clothes, boots, knives and utensils, hatchet, trenching tool all are quickly passed though stainless steel earned some remarks. Ropes, tent, and tarps get more notice for the strangeness of the materials. Twilight stutters when I spread out my cell phone and charging system. The LED lights are accepted as normal magic.

Then we get to the guns. I strip the AR, laying out and explaining each piece then do the same with the Beretta. I show them the ammo and explain how it made the sound and effect that Swift had observed. Then I say, “And right here in this state the guns will remain until at least two Princesses and one human say different.”

Twilight starts puffing up but I stop her, “Twilight, I say this because I love and respect you. This is the very technology that ended knights and kings on Terra. A foal with that AR is the equal of a dozen Royal Guard. Armor ceases to have meaning. And it can be scaled up to the point of destroying a castle in seconds. I do not want to unleash this turmoil on Equestria!”

The Colonel said, “Why don’t we just destroy it all right now?”

“Because you’ll have to destroy me and memories of me along with everything else. The physical existence isn’t what’s dangerous, it’s the concept. With the concept and a simple recipe, a foal can build a crude version capable of killing anypony in the room. Human children call then ‘zip guns’. I have far more dangerous concepts stored away in my brain right alongside concepts that could save the lives of thousands of ponies. You are the friends that I have chosen to help me and watch me. Celestia will make the final decision but we need to see that She has a chance to make a good one.”

Steel looks right at me, “What if She decides to destroy all of the technology?”

“Then I’ll expect speed and honor.”

Twilight is looking seriously worried now. “John, what are you and the Colonel talking about?”

“Military things, Twilight, the kind of things we exist to protect you from.”

We step out and closed the door as the Colonel produces two large padlocks for the two hasps on the door. “Major, these are enchanted locks. Put a drop of your blood on the key before you lock it and nopony else will be able to use that key to unlock it. There are two keys for each lock. The room has wards and I will know if anypony attempts to teleport in.”

I pulled out my folder and pricked a finger. A drop of blood later I had locked the top lock.

“May I borrow that?” from the Colonel.

“Sure” And it floats off my open hand. Seconds later it is back and the bottom lock is locked.

I hold the second key to my lock out to Swift. She bites her tongue, spits on the key, and takes it with her lips locking the top lock again.

Colonel Steel holds the last key out to Twilight. It floats over to Twilight and she looks at me expectantly so I open the knife again and hold it out. She floats it over and makes a small nick on her shoulder. The knife floats back, the key gets its drop of blood and the bottom lock is locked again.

The Colonel and I exchange salutes and he marches up the hall. Swift, Twilight, and I go the other way. When we get back to the residential section Twilight heads for her tower after agreeing that we should be at her place by eight o’clock in the morning.

Swift and I walk quietly to our suite and in the door. I just get the door closed and she is on me. “John Sampson! Which pit of Tartarus were you spawned from?”

“Swift, I warned you what life with a human would be like.”

“You said you would terrify me, not torture me!”

“I’m sorry, my darling, at least I found somepony else to take the worst burden from you.”

She just puts her head down and charges me. Again. And again. I just stand there and take it until she runs out of anger and collapses. After carefully picking her up I walk to the bed where I sit and rock her. She clings to me and sobs for a while. Finally, “Oh John. I’m so pathetic. You’re the pony facing death and I’m falling apart.”

“I think you handled yourself rather well for having such a shock just dumped on you. You didn’t even twitch when Twilight was completely clueless.”

“But look at you. You aren’t bothered at all.”

“Swift, my love, I’ve had years to adjust to my fate. When I first got a look at pony society I knew something like this was coming. You have been the surprise good luck in my journey.”

And she is off and wailing again. When she has calmed down again, I say, “I’m not planning to die. The possibility gives my words more weight but I am sure Celestia will find a better way. Now why don’t we find something to eat?”

Dinner is quiet and tender. She leans on me and we feed each other tidbits. Afterwards we just sit together grooming. She works on my back and I on her mane. We take a slow shower then settle onto the bed. I lay on my back and drape her across my chest.

“What are you doing, John?”

“My heart wants to feel your heart.”

She lifts her head until she is almost nose to nose with me staring directly into my eyes. “John are you absolutely sure?”

“I don’t know why but I am completely certain that this is the right thing to do.”

She begins to rub her cheek against my cheek. She rubs up the side of my head and down across my shoulder. Then she very softly kisses me full on the lips. The same gentle rubbing continues on the other side of my head. As she crosses over, she kisses me again, a little deeper. The place where our bodies meet is beginning to feel a little warm. She keeps rubbing and kissing as my heart begins to pound. I can feel her heart pounding in her chest and it is the most wonderful thing that I have ever felt. The rubbing accelerates and the kisses go deeper. My heart rate increases as it seemed to home in on hers. Suddenly our hearts synchronize and began to beat together. It feels like one heart is pumping across our chests, from hers to mine and back again. A warm glow spreads from our hearts until it completely surrounds and contains us. I don’t know how long we lay there but I had no intention of ever leaving that feeling of perfect bliss.

“ Thank you , John. I have never in my wildest dreams imagined that it would be this way. I don’t care if we never consummate it. I don’t care if either or both of us is dead in the morning. This one perfect moment is worth everything.”

“Swift, I’m sorry that we can’t have everything we want right away but there is something that you should know. While you were celebrating with your squad, Fred told me that we are going to have a foal.”

Our heart actually skipped a beat. “John, are you sure of this?”

“No, but Fred told Big Mac that I was turning into a pony the day before I did. I have a hard time understanding him when he makes these pronouncements but he’s never been wrong. Remind me to ask Twilight and the doctor just how complete this pony transformation is.”

“We’ve got a few months to go before spring and we know all of the best Alicorns in the world. We’ll figure it out. Meanwhile, you are completely and eternally mine. Banding the old way is the strongest way,” Swift declares.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Six )

It’s that damned noise again! The screech of it is tearing my ears apart but Swift is on top of me and our hearts are still linked. She starts to roll off of me so I clutch her to me, holding on for dear life.

“John, what’s the matter? You know we have to get up.”

“I never want to be separated from you ever again.”

“Silly stallion. We can’t be separated. Now let me turn that noise off.”

I loosen my grip and she slips away off to the side of the bed. I roll and sit up on the other side of the bed feeling my chest. There’s no blood or injury, just the same old skin. But then I feel her. With back turned and eyes closed I know that Swift is right there and moving that way. The world is the way it should be.

“Swift, why did I wait so long to do this?”

“Because you couldn’t until you finished turning into a pony?”

“I like this. I think I’ll make some tea.”

As I fumble about the kitchen, “Swift, what do you think of Colt? Specifically, do you think he can handle a complicated clerk’s job?”

“John, one of his biggest problems is that he is too much of a bookworm. He volunteered for the squad so he could feel like he is doing something important. He made it through the training on sheer guts. If you could find him a clerk job that made a difference, he would be in heaven. His full name is Berry Blush.”

“Good deal. I think I’ve got one for him.”

Otherwise today is pretty much a duplicate of yesterday except I dress in new cammies and I have a new heart. When we make it to the cafeteria I order three eggs, toast, and strawberries. Corporal Red Dawn is sitting with his back to us so I walk by him and turn, “Mind if we sit here?”

He shoots up out of his chair like somepony has shoved a rocket up his butt. “Yes, Sir! . . . I mean, No, Sir.”

“Sit, Red Dawn.” And we sit opposite him. “Do you see any uniform or insignia on me?”

“No, Sir.”

“’No, John.’ I have staff rank because I am the single individual in Equestria that has even heard of several foreign powers. In case something goes wrong I will stand next to the commanders and tell them what I know of the enemy. I’ve never held a sword or worn armor in my life. It’s why you’ll see me talking to Royals too. I had an appointment yesterday and I have one today so I’ll wear my uniform and rank after PT. Until then I’m John, a lost traveler.”

“What about the Captain?”

“Captain Swift Trail is my keeper. She’s a friend too but her primary job is to keep me from screwing up. It is being discussed if I can be sent through Basic. Being human, absolutely nothing comes in my size.”

When we enter the gym I turn to Red Dawn and say, “If you have any suggestions that might let me push myself, I’m interested.”

“I’ll think about that,” he smiled.

I start on pushups and jacks again while Red Dawn walks into a small ambush by several ponies his age.

Then I decide to get creative again. I put a deadpony on each end of the barbell and go jogging with it on my shoulders. After about five laps I am sweating a little so I rack the weights and go looking at the machines. They all seem about right for finger exercises but I find a big rope like you would use for a tug of war. Taking it with me, I go to where Red Dawn and his friends are doing calisthenics. “Hey Red Dawn. I need a challenge. How many of your friends can you get on this rope?”

Seven of them jump up so we move to the open floor and stretch the rope. Red Dawn looks at me and says, “It doesn’t matter how strong you are, John. We outweigh you.”

I wrap the rope across my waist and set my feet. Somepony calls “Go!” and they start pulling. As Red Dawn predicted, my feet begin to slide on the floor. Something inside me says ‘NO!’ and I feel power pulse through my legs and feet. I stop moving. Then I take a step. They are sliding now. As I concentrate, it gets easier and I begin striding across the floor with eight ponies in tow. Nearing a rack of weights, I stop.

“Hey Red Dawn, that all the friends you got?” We have most of the gym watching us by now. Six more ponies volunteer and we lay the rope out again. The same Unicorn calls “GO!” again. This time the rope doesn’t move either way. I lean into it hard and still it doesn’t move. There is a loud ‘crack’ and I stumble forward holding a slack rope.

The Unicorn that was judging looks at me and says, “You have Earth pony magic. I saw it that time.”

“Are you sure?”

Now we have a very puzzled Unicorn, “How could you not know?”

“This is just my second day as a pony.”

“What did you say, John Sampson?”

“I just took my Oath two days ago and it took full effect yesterday so I’m still learning how to be a pony.”

There was complete silence. The Unicorn looked carefully at me and asked, “Was that Oath in the Royal Court two mornings ago?”

“Yes.”

“John Sampson, that was Alicorn level magic.”

“Well, of course. There were three Alicorns in the room and Celestia Herself accepted it.”

“No, John. The strength of an oath is purely the strength of the oath taker. That was all you.”

“Huh? . . . You have most certainly given me something to think about. Right now I need to go apologize to Colonel Steel Will for breaking his rope. I want to thank you all for the challenge. Maybe we’ll think up another one.”

I head for the showers and feel Swift coming from the other side of the gym. This linked heart thing could be handy. With the shower done and my uniform on we step back out to the gym and find every pony in the place lined up on either side of the door holding salute. I blink and return salute, striding purposely out the main door.

The Company Clerk is waiting for us. She opens the door into the Colonel’s office and gestures. We step through and she closes the door behind us.

“Major. Why are you tormenting my NCOs?

“Sir, I was trying to rebrand myself as a harmless academic. It didn’t really work out. And I owe you a rope.”

“A rope, Major?”

“The big rope in the gym that’s used for tug of war games. I broke it.”

“Just as a matter of curiosity, what were you doing when it broke?”

“We were having a tug of war. Me and fourteen other ponies. I learned something. The Unicorn judging said I was using Earth pony magic.”

“John, I’m going to verify that. Stand still.” So I stood and his horn lit for several minutes. “John, you are positively loaded with raw magic but the only Earth pony magic I can detect is on your heart. Congratulations.”

“Thank, you2,” Swift and I say in perfect unison.

“Now that you are banded, I can set you up with an apartment in the Guard Sector almost as big as where you are now though a lot more practical. Let me know when you are ready.”

“Celestia put us there so we would be convenient for Princesses but we’re spending all our time back here. I’ll be asking Her about it sometime soon.

“I have another favor to ask of you. I need a Private. Specifically, I need a youngster from Swift’s old squad named Berry Blush. It will take at least a month to gauge how well he’s working out and if he does like I think he will, he’ll be permanent.”

“No problem. Do you need an office too?”

“Let me reach stability first.” I said.

“Just let me know when you’re ready for him.”

“Right now we have a Princess to meet. Thank you, sir”

We pause in the clerk’s office long enough to change our status.

Twilight is ready when we get there so we just loop through her door and head for the doctor’s office. My favorite nurse is behind the counter and has my clipboard waiting. I point out my entourage and tell her to advise the doctor that Twilight would be consulting due to a major magical event that had happened yesterday. She didn’t even blink.

An hour of forms later I am sent to Imaging. A young Unicorn mare sets me against a white wall, adjusting padded brackets on the wall to hold me in place. Then she brings over a drafting table with a stack of large sheets of paper on it. Her eyes get a far away look and her horn lights. Suddenly pencils start flying on the table. As the first sheet of paper rolls over the front of the table and I catch a glimpse of a human skeleton sketched there. Nearly an hour later a very tired Unicorn drops the pencils and steps back. On the table is an image of every organ and major system in my body with color contrast. I knew some human doctors that would die for this.

A young Pegasus comes in, picks up the paper, and leaves quickly. I am sent back out to the waiting room. After a few minutes a nurse calls my name and leads us to a room in the back. “Please remove all clothing and jewelry and lay on the table.” ‘The table’ being a padded platform about six inches off the floor. I get sneaky and roll my pants up to use as a pillow. Swift and Twilight began a spirited criticism of my anatomy.

About thirty minutes later, “Good morning. I’m Doctor Red Duke. What brings us here today?”

I look up and just start laughing.

“My, we are certainly happy this morning.”

“I’m sorry Doctor. I knew a Doctor Red Duke in my previous life. The contrast of appearance is astounding.” This Doctor Duke is a very small middle aged Unicorn mare with a striking yellow coat. “That Doctor Duke was known as one of the very best physicians alive.”

“I’ll try to live up to your expectations. Now, why are we here today?”

“First, the Guard and the Princesses want to know as much as they can about humans. Me being the first one and co-operative it seems mostly a matter of recording baseline information on everything about me. Second, I want you to have as much information as possible about what humans are supposed to look and act like in case you ever have to put me back together. Third, we would like to know just how much of a pony I am becoming. I’m having ‘unusual’ magic experiences.”

“That seems easy enough. Let’s start with your heart. Do you know where humans normally have their pulse read?”

“The inner surface of the wrist is most convenient and where the neck joins the body is most reliable. My heart rate at this moment is resting normal.”

“She felt around my wrist for a moment then called out “Fifty. You seem a little cool.”

“Normal human body temperature is slightly lower than equine.”

“Lets see what you sound like.”

Placing a cocked ear just above my chest, she scowled, “Bring me his chart.” A nurse rushed in.

Studying the paper for a second, “As I thought, your records are inaccurate. We’ll have to do them all over again.”

Another day of paper blizzard? Not happening. “Doctor, what are you talking about?”

“You have a very obvious ‘ghost heartbeat’. That means you are banded by heart bonding. The sign in papers you filled out are clearly marked ‘single’. I don’t think you could have failed to notice the ceremony so something is off about your papers. The only sure way to correct that is to do them again and compare.”

Focus. “Doctor, there is another way. You might try asking me. You see, your system is such a clusterfuck that I was single when I filled out that part of the form. By the time I got in here I had been banded.”

“I’m sorry, Major, that just won’t do. There are too many possible inaccuracies. We have to be sure.”

Command voice: “Captain Red Duke, you are ordered to finish this examination by assuming that I know more about my body than you do. You will speak with Princess Twilight and I as though we understand the inner workings of my body and magic. Do you understand me?”

“YES SIR!”

Damned, what a time for an itch. “Captain Red Duke, you will speculate with Captain Swift Trail and myself on the possibility of my siring a foal. You will remember that I have a fair grasp genetics and reproductive biology. Do you understand me?”

“YES SIR!”

It’s itching really good now but I’m ignoring it. “Captain Red Duke, in a few days time, I will bring a young clerk to you. You will assign a competent nurse to work with this clerk. I will instruct them in human methods of data handling. You will oversee their work to insure medical accuracy. I will oversee the technical aspects. We will construct a sensible system to allow ponies to obtain medical care in a timely manner. Do you understand me?”

“YES SIR!”

“John?”

“A few more seconds Swift.”

Damned that itches! “Captain Red Duke, you will do this because when it is successful, I will insist that you receive full credit and a promotion to Major so that you can teach this system across Equestria and benefit all ponies. Do you understand me?”

“Yes, Sir?”

“Now Swift.”

“What does that symbol mean?”

“What symbol, Swift?”

“It’s several different shaped boxes connected by lines and arrows.”

“That sounds like a flow chart.”

“What does it mean, John?”

“It’s a kind of human technology that is used to organize action and/or information. It’s what I want to teach this Doctor. Where did you see this?”

“On your flank.”

‘On your flank.’ That’s three of the most significant words in a pony’s life. I waved the Doctor back a little and stand so I could get a full view of it. Yep, there it is. In full color and real as real gets. I’m the flowchart pony.

So I step over to where Swift is standing, carefully take her head in my hands, bend over, and give her a full on, ‘x’ rated, promise of things to come, kiss. After about half a minute I pull back. She gasps, “John, please tell me, for future use, what brought that on?”

“While we were flying back in the chariot I made a bet with myself. I swore that I would kiss the first mare that realizes that physical strength isn’t my talent and asks what is. You just won first prize.”

That woke Twilight up. “John, are you saying that if I had asked first you would have put a lip lock like that on me?”

“Yes. I was actually expecting Celestia to win, though.”

Nothing but stunned silence. So went back to the ‘table’ and sat down putting me close to eye level with the Doctor. “What’s next Doc?”

Doctor Red Duke blinked once then said, “Major, while a little magic help may be needed, I am quite certain that you could have a foal in next year’s crop if you desired,” and pointedly looks down.

Oops. I’ve got a boner that would make Big Mac proud. Y O G A. Y O G A. “Doctor, heartbonding isn’t possible for a human. I’d never even heard of it. And I started it. I said the traditional words first with total and absolute certainty that those were the specific words that I must say. Are you sure I’ll need external help?”

“I can run a fertility panel on you and see what’s there to see.”

“Tell me, Doc. Humans have forty six chromosomes. Terran equines have sixty two, sixty three, or sixty four. How many do ponies have?”

“What’s a ‘chromosome?’”

“A chromosome is an organized stack of DNA that encodes the genetic information of a given organism.”

“What’s ‘DNA’?

I glance over and Twilight looks like she is approaching orgasm. “Doc, lets try the other end of this problem. Why don’t we start with the images of my body and be sure we are on the same page re organ names and such?”

The same Pegasus that took the pictures away earlier brings us three copies of them and a box of pencils. We determine that most of my organs are what and where they are supposed to be. The doc did notice one difference. “You have a well developed gall bladder. I take that means you are a meat eater?”

“Yes, Doc, that is one of my weaknesses. In fact, it was eating a Manticore that got me into this mess.”

The Doctor slowly edges away, “You ate a Manticore?”

“Well it seemed fair, Doc. He was trying to eat me.”

After an assurance that I don’t eat ponies, we got back to the images. Generic images of ponies were brought in for comparison and I noticed a difference.

“Doc, what’s this web of veins that runs from the extremities to the horn in a Unicorn?”

Twilight spoke up instead, “It’s how we gather magic and conduct it to our horn so it can be projected. A Pegasus would have the veins terminating in her wings. An Earth pony has no defined terminus but does have the veins running from hoof to hoof.”

“Okay. Now look at my images. It’s called my Lymphatic System and it terminates in my heart. There is no magic on Terra so humans wouldn’t develop a magic system but damned if this doesn’t look just the same. Same patterns, same nodes. How can we test this idea?”

It is determined that Twilight will maintain a shield to protect all from an accidental discharge. The Imagining Unicorn will watch and record my lymphatic system while I lift something beyond normal human strength to activate my magic. Doctor Red will measure the flow of magic in and out of me. But it is also decided to do it after lunch so I get dressed and we head out.

“I’m all for the Guard Cafeteria. What interests you mares?”

“I don’t see why not,” from Swift.

“You want the meat, don’t you, John?”

“Yes, Twilight, I do. There are trace nutrients that have been missing from my diet and I’m anxious to repair that. And it tastes good.”

“Alright, John, let’s do it.”

Both the mares choose large salads. I choose a small salad and grilled chicken with potatoes. I decide to splurge and order a beer with it. It is going to be my first chance to spend an earned bit but she won’t take my money. “It’s my honor, sir.” I take the salad and beer and follow the mares.

We settle on a table near the kitchen because I have to wait for my chicken to cook. I am about halfway through my salad when Twilight looks up and fires off, “When were you two planning to tell the rest of us?”

Swift looks at me so I field it, “I was planning something like lunch today but, in case you haven’t noticed, shit just happens around me. Like I told the Doctor, I didn’t have a clue what the significance of the words were, I just knew that they were right in some ultimate sense. When I tap my magic in the gym, I don’t know what I’m doing, I just will it to happen and it does.”

“John, that’s a pretty good description of how magic works for most ponies. The question is how you are manipulating the magic without a magic organ or is there a human magic organ that we don’t recognize?”

Somepony calls my name about then so I go to the kitchen and pick up my grilled chicken. It doesn’t last long at all. Twilight is watching me like an experiment. “John, I think you might have to adjust your diet. It takes energy to use magic. You wouldn’t believe how much Celestia eats and still stays slender.

We decide to pass through the Colonel’s office to update my status (again) and give him a date for Berry Blush. The clerk is opening the door as we walk in, “Princess Sparkle, Major Sampson, and Captain Trail to see you, sir.

“Princess, how may I help you?”

Twilight just points to me.

“Well, John, what have you broken now?” with a grin.

“Nothing, sir. This time I fixed something.” And I pulled my pants down exposing my flank.

“Congratulations. Now, what is it?”

“It’s called a ‘flow chart’. It’s a human tool used to organize large complex activities into something manageable.””

“So your talent is organizing?”

“There’s more to it than just that. It’s also used to impose logic on situations too complex for one pony to visualize.”

“Interesting. Just how do you use it?”

“It’s the talent that makes me such an effective problem solver. Show me a problem and I will quickly break it down into steps that lead to a solution. It’s why I’ll need Berry Blush in three days.”

“You will be notified when he arrives.”

“Thank you, sir”

“I can’t wait to see what you come up with tomorrow. Dismissed.”

We pause long enough to let the clerk make a sketch of my new cutie mark then off we go to the Doctor’s office. When we get there nopony was ready for me. I decide to take advantage of the time with Twilight.

“Twilight, Luna had these clothes made for me and I don’t have the first clue where. I need more, I need different, and I would like to get my cutie mark printed on some of them. Do you have any idea where I should go?”

“John, that’s just perfect. Rarity is another of the Bearers and she owns a shop in Ponyville. You both need a wardrobe. I’ll just set you up with one as a wedding gift. And John, don’t try to back out. Rarity would pay you to wear her designs in Royal Court. Swift, you two need to complement each other if you want to mingle in Royal Society."

“I’ll tell you what, Twilight, there’s another condition. We need to get out of the Ambassadorial Suite sometime soon. It’s nice as hell after living in a mud hut for two years but everything we do is back here. Besides if I’m going to participate Royal Society, I want a place I can retreat to. I want a defensible space. The Colonel has offered us a decent apartment in the Guard Sector. I want the option to look at it and maybe say yes.”

“Of course, John. You can live anywhere you want as long as somepony else isn’t already living there. And I’ll outfit it with conveniences so I can visit you in comfort every once and awhile.”

“One more thing. Allow time for a party in Ponyville and notify Pinkie before we go there.”

A low rumbling noise that I had noticed began to get loud enough to get everypony’s attention. It stopped just outside the hall door. The door opened and an Earth pony stuck his head in, “Where do you want it?” And right there, in the hall, was what we were waiting for, a deadpony ball.

The nurse wants it in the imaging room but the cart won’t fit through the door. The two Earth ponies made a production of rigging a bar through the ring and preparing to carry it in. I can’t take any more. “Just leave it there.”

“But, sir, if they leave it out there, how are we going to get it to the imaging room?”

“Just open the door.” I walk over, pick it up with one hand, and walk in. The nurse gets out of my way.

I set the deadpony in front of the white wall and wait. In about ten minutes the Doctor and Image Tech come rushing in, “They told me it would take another hour to get that thing in here.”

“Captain, you are going to ignore me one more time and I am going to become a literal monster.” I walk over to the deadpony and pick it up. Waving it at the Doctor, I say, “I could have simply carried it back from lunch and saved us all a couple of hours.”

We decide that since I had already been ‘juggling’ deadponies without disaster for days, we will dispense with the shield. Everypony is lined up and ready. “Go.” And I lift the ball and hold it out with arm at full length in front of me. After several pages, “Enough.” and I set it down.

The sketches seemed to show that the veins moved but how wasn’t clear. The Imaging Unicorn said, “I can’t draw fast enough to show it but when he has the ball lifted there is something traveling from his core to his extremities through those veins with a wave motion like peristalsis. It’s very small and very fast but it’s too consistent to be an accident.”

Twilight is in her element now. “We need a control. John, can you do something hard without magic? And I don't think we want the sketches if they don't show what we need.”

“Sure. Ready?”

“Go” And I push hand against hand as hard as I can. Then I turn it around and pull. “Enough.”

Everypony looked at the Imaging Tech, “Nothing. Good muscles, no magic.”

“John, could you do the same thing with magic, flex your magic muscles?”

“Ready.”

“Go.” And no magic came. Nothing.

“It doesn’t work. The magic won’t come.”

“That’s good John. It’s what I hoped for. It means that your magic is fully controlled. You just have to find out how to operate the controls.” Twilight smiles.

“Alright. Now what does that mean for my personal problem?”

The Doctor and Twilight look at each other. Twilight spoke up. “John, It should mean that you are perfectly safe to do anything you want with Swift. You couldn’t use your magic to harm anypony unless you explicitly wanted to. Your magic is not like Unicorn magic, it’s goal oriented like Pegasus or Earth pony magic.”

“Are you both completely sure of that?”

“As sure as anypony can be with a completely new kind of pony.”

“What about fertility?”

"Ordinarily I would say ‘no’ right off. Ponies have made bands with Griffons, Zebras, and Minotaurs. None have been fertile without help. You might be an exception. I would just give it try. If it doesn’t work I can spell you to all physical stallion, part stallion, or make you fertile with any female. The worst thing that can happen is a years wait." Twilight offered.

Doctor Red has an idea, “Major, I might be able to help. We talked earlier about a fertility panel. That would require a semen sample. I could tell you how healthy your sperm is and you could see what happens when you ejaculate with your magic while risking nothing but an A/V. Follow me.”

We follow Doctor Red down the hall and turn into what is obviously a well equipped reproductive lab. There is a phantom in the middle of the room and racks of A/Vs in sizes on the wall. The Doctor studies the A/Vs for a moment, “How big do you flare, Major?”

“I don’t.”

“You don’t?”

“Humans don’t flare enough that an equine would notice it.”

“That simplifies things. Strip.” She moves over two rows and chooses an A/V. Taking it to the counter, she opens a drawer and pulls out a liner. Another drawer yields a bottle of gel. She pulls the liner through the A/V and folds the big end over securing it with a large rubber band. She pulls the small end through a ring then over the mouth of a small bottle. The ring slides down and holds the bottle tightly. By then my clothes are folded on the counter.

The Doctor fills the A/V with warm water then pours a little gel into the liner and spreads it with large thermometer. She doesn’t like the thermometer so her horn glows briefly. A little more gel and she’s happy. The A/V sockets into the cavity in the phantom and a snap locks it there. “Stand here, Major.”

A quick crank of a wheel on the front places the phantom at just the right height.

I just stand there looking at it. A lump of wood and cloth simply doesn’t thrill me.

“Do you need help, Major?” the Doctor asks.

“NO! I’ll handle my stallion. Pick me up and sit me on top of it facing you,” Swift exclaims.

I put both hands around her barrel and sit her on the phantom. She wraps her hind legs around it and raises her front hooves to my shoulders. Leaning in she plants a triple ‘x’ rated kiss with deep tongue on me. Suddenly I can feel myself twitching against the back of the phantom. Releasing my mouth, she nibbles gently on my right ear. In a whisper, “John, if you get this right, there’s going to be heaven on Equestria at home tonight.”

Damned! I better get it in before it’s too late. Moving my hips back, I probe for the hole. Yes! As I thrust in I reach up and grab the phantom’s ‘mane’ with my arms on either side of Swift. She wraps her front legs around my ribs and puts her chin on my shoulder. Oh. my. It’s so hot and so soft and I thrust and thrust and she hums. Then the animal takes over. I hilt in the A/V and jerk up and down as I empty myself into the small bottle.

I become aware that I’m hugging Swift against me as I step back. I quickly bend over and set her carefully on the floor. Suddenly I notice that there is a large wet stain on the back of the phantom and it smells SO good.

“Ouch!” as she kicks me on the shin.

“Not now, John. Later.”

Twilight and Doctor Red are comparing notes while I clean up in the sink.

Doctor Red remarks, “Thirty one thrusts, Major. That’s approaching clinical impotence. Do you need some help?”

Twilight looks concerned too, “Two full minutes to ejaculation! I hope you’re just bashful.”

Swift is rubbing against my flank, her cheek against my ribs, smiling. She knows.

I can’t help it, I just start laughing.

“You’re right doctor. Two minutes is near a clinical problem for humans. All I can say is that it’s been a few years.”

A very confused doctor asks, “With ponies long abstinence usually brings quicker ejaculation. Are you saying that humans are different?”

“Not at all, Doctor. Two minutes is right on the edge of premature ejaculation for humans.”

“Oh.” Now getting the A/V out has become important. Holding it up Doctor Red pronounces, “Good volume, good color, it seems like a lot of gel though. Is that another human idiosyncrasy, Major?”

“Yep. Remember that humans are vertical. It has to be sticky or it would just run out when she stands up.”

The Doctor has the little bottle on the counter and is dividing the contents into sample tubes. “I’ll get these to the lab and you can have your results in an hour or two.”

I’m halfway through getting dressed. “No rush, Doctor. We’ll stop by later for the results and any further tests.”

I’m fully dressed and eyeballing the door when Twilight finally wakes up. “I know you lovebirds are anxious to get home so I just want one thing, when will I see you again?”

“I think we’ll take tomorrow off unless somepony declares some sort of emergency. If you want to study my magic, meet us in the Guard cafeteria at zero five hundred the morning after next. You can observe my morning PT.”

“I think I’ll do that, John. I find I know less about my Guard than I thought I did. Don’t be surprised if I schedule a trip to Ponyville for that day.”

“We’ll be ready. And thanks for the help, Princess.” As Swift drags me to the door.

Out in the hall I am amazed at how fast those little legs can move. I’m trotting to keep up. “Swift, honey, are you really in that big a hurry?”

“YES!”

“Okay.” I scoop her up and hold her to my chest as I lengthen my stride and lean into the wind. And we’re there. As I set her down to open the door, “I didn’t know I could do that.”

We rush through and I start stripping as I lock the door. Turning, there she is, legs spread, tail up, and winking like a strobe

I step in front of her and the eyes are tracking me. “You don’t think you’re going to get off that easy, do you?”

Picking her up and cradling her in my arms I walk to the bed and sit. “I’ve spent the last two and a half years fitting myself into your world. Tonight it’s your turn. You are about to learn just what you have crawled into bed with.”

She’s trembling and I can feel our heart pounding. “Do you know why the heat and the pheromones compel you to rush through sex? It’s because ponies were prey animals. Your distant ancestors learned to avoid being eaten by being fast. That’s. Not. Me. Humans were hunted by the same predators and took a different path. Humans made weapons and fought back. Now predators run from humans. And that has shaped human sex too. We take our time. Why not? No one messes with us and emerges unscathed.

I turn her so her eyes are level with mine. “You are my Chosen, Swift Trail. My love. My mare. Bearer of my foals. I want you. I need you.”

With my nose touching hers, I breathe deeply three times drinking in her scent. Our heart pounds harder but I calm it. I rub my cheek softly on hers, running my tongue along her lips, nibbling lightly. Her ears get some nibbles too. Her tail is thrashing wildly in my crotch, teasing my erection. My thighs are wet. “Oh no. That trick is too old.”

I turn and lay her on her back on the bed positioning myself on my knees leaning between her hind legs. “I’m going to play you like a fiddle.” Leaning over her, I kiss her driving my tongue into her mouth. She gasps and tries to trap my tongue with hers. We duel for several minutes and our heart is pounding again. This time I let it.

I slip down below her chin to her neck, that long, sinuous equine neck, and kiss my way from side to side on it slowly approaching her chest. She is beginning to wiggle under me making guttural noises. As my head passes between her front legs I start caressing both sides of her barrel with my hands. She bucks wildly wrapping her front legs around my head and her back legs around my kidneys grinding herself against my abs. I feel warm wet on me as she lets out a primal scream. All I can do is let her ride it out.

“John?”

“Yes?”

“You aren’t even fully excited yet. How can I just take from you like this?”

“It’s not your choice. I choose to give you this gift and many more like it. We have tonight and tomorrow to go. I’ll have my chance.

Putting my head back down on her chest, I listen. The doctor was right. It sounds like she has an echo in her chest. This is what life is for, just knowing that strong, brave, generous heart is part of me forever.

I need to give her more so I continue my journey down her body falling off the bottom of her ribs and landing on her soft downy belly. I nuzzle around rubbing my cheeks on her warmth. What’s this? A belly button! I lick it and she shudders. So I lick again long and slow. She moans. Placing my lips around her belly button, I suck, pulling it up so I can flick the tip of my tongue back and forth across it. She’s panting and moaning now. Time to move on. My tongue slides down her belly and into the crevice between her teats. She spreads her hind legs begging me to play there. I trace a figure eight around her teats with my tongue. The moans are getting louder so I blow on her nipple getting a sharp jump.

As I tease her nipple with my lips she raises her rump, chasing my mouth with her teat. I slide my hands under her rump and lift, pushing forward. Her hind legs cant toward her head and heaven comes into view. I breath on her rapidly winking clitoris and her nether lips part, opening her vagina all the way to her cervix, begging me to dive in. So I do, running my tongue around her rippling walls. She’s bucking again, trying to force my tongue deeper into her. I take her lips between my lips and pull. She screams so I ram my tongue into her again. She clamps on my tongue and gushes sweet nectar into my mouth as her scream warbles. She tastes like hay and honey.

We ride her peak down the other side and she lays there with her chest heaving.

“How are we doing, love?”

“I. . . I. . . I never dreamed.”

“I’ll tell you what, one more round, for me, then we’ll take a break.”

I’d let her straighten out while she recovered so her teats are right under my nose. I dive tongue first into that delicate crevice between her teats. Again she spreads her legs inviting me to her most delicate places. I bounce back and forth between her nipples nipping lightly on each in turn. She squeals with each nip. I can feel the muscles rippling below my chin as her clitoris winks madly so I raise her rump to bring it to my mouth. I surround it with my lips and suck. She gasps and bucks. I suck harder. Her clitoris fights back, dueling with my tongue. My chin slips into her vagina as she pulls wide open. This is what I’m waiting for.

I slide quickly up her hind legs holding her rump rotated. Supporting my weight on my extended arms and knees, I drag my erection up her valley, feeling for her clitoris. It’s there! I time the winks and when it opens, I slip easily in. She’s tight but oh so slick. I begin to ease down but she bucks up, hilting herself on me. We drop into a rhythm, me thrusting down as she bucks up. Her vaginal muscles grip and pull in time to my thrusts. Her tail wraps up over my back holding my balls against her wonderful heat. We are making loud squelching sounds now as her nectar flows again.

I feel our heart pounding, I feel the tension gathering in her body and mine. I feel the absolute need to bury every last bit of myself in her as I begin to pump my very essence into her. As her body grabs mine and pulls that essence into it, I throw my head back and scream, joining her scream.

I want this moment to last forever but it’s just not to be. So I roll to my left releasing her and stretch out beside her. I reach over and pull her against my shoulder.

She turns her head and looks into my eyes, “Is this really how humans do it?”

“Not always. It takes love, good health, and some skills to make it to this level. But sometimes it’s better.”

“I don’t know if I could survive better. We are definitely going to have to stock up on healing and stamina spells before spring.

“Let’s go get a shower before we get all sticky.”

After a warm shower and a lazy dinner we are laying on a giant bean bag in the main room grooming. I’m combing her mane out one strand at a time. When I find a tangle, I bite it out. It’s just so comfortable being together like this.

“John, this isn’t what I thought of when you said humans had sex for days at a time.”

“What, you thought I’d be stuck inside you for a week?”

“Well, maybe not a week.”

“Darling, you can’t have a peak without a valley. And we do need food and water to keep up our strength.”

“It’s not that, John. This is better, just being happy together knowing that a living piece of you is inside me. I wish I was fertile right now. I need to give you a foal.”

“Well, we could always try again? Do you think you could support part of my weight?”

“I’m a mare. I was born to support a stallion twice my size. And I’m an Earth pony. I could support your full weight as long as I didn’t try to move.”

“Perfect.”

I reach over and pinch her flank.

“Ouch!”

I stand and pinch her shoulder.

“Hey!”

I lean over and rub my head across her neck, nickering softly.

She jumps up breathing heavily, “John?”

I pinch her left front ankle.

She stomps, “John!”

I reach under her and run my hand up and down the inside of her left front leg pulling it toward me.

She swings her butt against my side.

I reach across her back and rub my chin on her far side nickering strongly.

She squeals and runs out from underneath me.

I chase her, trapping her in the kitchen by placing my body sideways across the corner she is in. I grunt a deep note.

She whirls and fires a double barrel kick at me.

I dodge back and she slips by me. I chase her into the bedroom.

She’s standing facing me with eyes wide, panting and tail straight up.

I step forward staring directly into her eyes, towering over her.

She lowers her head and whinnies.

I push her toward the bed with my shoulder.

She tries to run by me to the door but I cut her off.

She tries another kick but I sidestep it and push her toward the bed again.

She’s backed against the bed with her tail waving wildly so I pinch her shoulder again.

She whirls and jumps up on the bed to escape me but I grab her around the barrel before she can take a step.

My hands fit neatly between her ribs and hips as I pull her toward me. She tries to kick but I’ve got my weight on her now and she can’t lift her feet off the bed.

Her tail rolls over and sideways against my right arm. She’s winking wildly.

I step up and poke my erection against her backside, feeling for the soft spot.

I feel warm wet on the left side of my member so I shift left.

As I probe forward I am rewarded by a gush of her nectar over me.

I raise up and push forward again. I feel warm and wet. Suddenly she opens up and pushes back. I’m in!

I start a slow steady rhythm. Leaning over her I snort and grunt. Every time I’m deep in her my balls bump her clitoris. It winks madly against me.

She turns her head and is staring at me as I rut her for all I’m worth. I can feel something like a ball of soft meeting my glans every time my thrust bottoms. I push harder and my glans embeds in it. It’s her cervix. That’s all I need. I ram myself home in her and unload every possible drop into her uterus as her clitoris massages my balls. She clamps down hard on me taking no chance of any sperm escaping. I take a deep breath and tell the whole world that I’ve just bred my mare.

I’d like to stay here forever but I’m rapidly shrinking to nothing so I step back and to one side. Swift launches herself across the bed, off the other side, and to the toilet. I hear water splashing in the background.

“John, Sweetheart, we are going to have to do that outdoors some day. Maybe we could do it on the Apple Farm and invite Applejack.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Seven )

It was a wonderful impromptu honeymoon but it is over. Time to get back to work. We are coming up on the Guard cafeteria at zero four fifty something. Twilight is supposed to meet us here to observe my PT and use of magic. I have my doubts about a Princess getting up at four AM, but who knows.

We walk in and my doubts are crushed. There sits Princess Twilight and Colonel Steel, apparently waiting for us.

“Swift, I want three eggs and oatmeal with fruit. Would you please order it for me? I’m going to go see what’s up.

As I approach the table the Colonel says, “Have a seat, John. Twilight and I have been talking about you.”

Informal, that’s better. “I hope it’s been an entertaining discussion.”

“It’s been a useful discussion. Twilight and I have agreed that you and Swift need better quarters. She is going to finance the remodeling of an officer’s suite in the Guard Sector. It will even have an office for you. You can expect to move in about four days.”

Twilight chimes in, “And best of all, John, it won’t have a balcony.”

“Oh well. I do like a balcony because you can leave the door open and get a nice breeze.”

“John, you do know doors work both ways?” from a serious Steel.

“And they pass more than just air?” From an equally serious Twilight.

Swift brings our food just then. “Quite a gathering we have here.”

“And they’re speaking in riddles,” I add.

“Now that we’re all here we can lay it on the table,” Steel says, “I’ve had three shifts of Guardponies entertained by you two.”

Twilight contributes, “The good news is that there are no foreign dignitaries on Ambassador’s Row right now. The bad news is that Celestia is in earshot.”

Steel is studying me, “You really are clueless, aren’t you. That balcony door you were talking about opens onto one of the main public courtyards. Half of the Castle has been listening to you two screw like rabbits for the last couple of days.”

“Half of the Castle and Princess Celestia Herself. The only thing that’s saved your butt is that she blames Cadance. She’s sure Cadance overspelled you two.” Twilight reveals.

“Who is ‘Cadance’?” I ask.

“Cadance is my sister-in-law and Celestia’s niece. She’s an Alicorn and the Princess of Love.”

Things are suddenly making sense.

“I think we broke John,” Twilight finally has her revenge.

“No, but some things are suddenly fitting together. She talks with Luna, doesn’t she?”

“Of course, John. Luna’s province is the Night and most love happens at night.”

“Celestia is right. Cadance didn’t change what happened but she did change when and how, probably for the better.”

“John, whatever you do, don’t tell Celestia that!” Twilight pleads.

“It’s Luna’s doing anyway. She has a special reason to ask Cadance for a favor like that. And you do know that doors can be knocked on too. Anypony could have just reminded us.”

“And interrupt the show? No way!” Twilight grins from ear to ear.

Steel drops off at his office while the rest of us continue to the gym. There is a hush when we walk in but conversation quickly returns to normal. I strip down to my tighty whities and hit the mat for some pushups. Then I rolled over for situps and finished with jacks. Twilight watches the whole sequence carefully.

“You aren’t using magic?”

“No Twilight, I’m warming up. Magic comes next.”

I go to my favorite bar set and load it with weights, set them on my shoulders, and go for a jog. As I come back around to Twilight, “Are you getting what you want?”

“Not really. Can you do something in one place?”

“Sure.” And I start doing squats.

Twilight walks around me waving her horn like a pointer tracing my body in the air. She stands back and admires the results. “You can stop now, John.”

Twilight looks serious. “John, I’ve just confirmed what I have been thinking all along. You, and probably Fred too, are half of an extremely powerful pony. You accumulate and store magic like an Alicorn but you have only the simplest of ways to express it. If you had a horn you would be as strong as Celestia. That’s why your Oath was so powerful. You had two years of magic stored and unused. If you breed a Unicorn, your foals could be the foundation of a new power in Equestria. As it is you can only do Earth pony magic which involves your muscles.”

“Could you give me a horn?”

“Don’t you think the world would be covered up in Alicorns if we could? Everything is educated speculation anyway. You could have some bizarre human way of using magic like throwing it from your fingertips. The only other creature in Equestria with hands is a Minotaur and they have two horns with no magic.

“I’m ready to go to Ponyville whenever you are.”

“Let me rack the weights and shower.”

We get to the rail station at exactly the right moment to catch the train. (I found out later that we couldn’t have got there at the wrong time. When a Princess reserves a train, the train moves on her schedule.)

But the train gave me a chance to think, always a dangerous situation.

“Twilight, you’ve told me that I can’t project magic and you’ve told me that I projected major magic when I took my Oath.”

“That says more about the imperfection of language than it does about you. We all project magic, the question is how the projection translates to action. Your magic is projected through your muscles and translates into movements like your muscles would make if they were stronger. My magic projects through my horn and translates however my will shapes it. You could push this train with your shoulder and move it, a feat far beyond ordinary muscle. I could sit on this train and will it to move and it would move at least as far and fast without any visible action on my part. That’s the difference between goal oriented magic and free magic.

“I get that, Twilight. My magic works through me, through my muscles so it can only do things that muscles do. So how did I ‘move’ an entire world when I took my Oath?”

“The only thing that moved was you. You used your magic to separate yourself from the world ‘Terra’ and attach yourself to the world ‘Equestria’. Nothing was changed but you. What everypony felt was Equestria, made up of all of us, acknowledge the change. We didn’t change, we recognized your change. What isn’t known is the nature of your change. Only you could know that and only by understanding your magic at that moment. Your will reshaped yourself to your desire using your extremely powerful stored magic. We will be a lifetime understanding all the nuances of that action.”

“What about this ‘overspell’ that Cadance is accused of?”

“Cadance denies that she did more than aim you at Swift and stand back. She says the banding was all you.”

“So how did I know what words to say or have such certainty that they were right for us? I’ve never even imagined that such a thing was possible much less been able to do it.”

“John, your Oath is the closest to free magic that you can come. To wield free magic one must be extremely careful and disciplined. If I were to say ‘I want water’ and use my magic to get it, I would most likely be rained on. If I want a drink, I have to say ‘I want a drinking glass filled with cool pure water right there on that table right now’. Any detail that I leave out of my visualization of my desire will be ‘filled in’ by something random. Then you stood up in Royal Court and cast the most general spell that you could devise. Who knows what random side effects it may manifest for the rest of your life.”

“So basically, I cursed myself.”

“I don’t think I’d refer to your banding to Swift as a curse. She is a trained warrior, you know.”

“I mean ‘cursed’ as in an ancient Terran curse, ‘May you live in interesting times’.”

“That’s a very good way of expressing it. Magic is a force, a kind of energy. It doesn’t do anything until we impose our will on it and shape it into our desire. As a manifestation of our will, it takes on the character of our will. That’s how magic gets to be ‘black’. Your Oath was cast with the best of intentions. Celestia would have never allowed it otherwise. So its random side effects will all tend to be good even if not what was expected or desired.”

“Twilight, please tell Celestia that if She’ll apologize to Cadance, I’ll apologize to Luna. I spelled my banding to Swift. When she and I discussed friendship, I also thought about the next level. She promised to teach me pony courtship in the future. I was thinking about her when I asked that question and I was thinking about how citizenship would affect a courtship before I took that Oath.”

“John, I’m beginning to see why Celestia values you so. Even as the newest foal in the pasture your instincts are spot on. I think you have a Fate.”

When the train pulled into the Ponyville station there was a pink blur waiting for us.

“Hello Twilight John Sampson Swift Trail!Oh you’ve changed.Congratulations Major Captain.”

And then the strangest thing happens, she just stops. Pinkie walks up to me and stands up, placing a hoof on my chest. “YES!” She blasts. Then she walks over to Swift and does the same. “YESYESYES!!!this is wonderful.We must rework everything.Be at City Hall by One PM.Don’t worry I’ll get you home by dark.” And pink blur shoots off the platform and into town.

Twilight smiles, “I told you so.”

Swift just grins.

“I’m guessing we’re about to have some sort of banding celebration?”

“At least.” Twilight laughed.

I shoulder my bag and we head into town with the goal of seeing Rarity first. Last time were through here my novelty drew a crowd. This time I am wearing Guard colors and insignia and the crowd is bigger if anything. I could blame some of that on the Princess next to me but she is a regular here. The good part, though, is that they want to get close. Last time there was a zone that nopony would cross around me. Now they all want to hoof bump or hug. It is wonderful.

Rarity is a gray Unicorn mare with a long dark blue mane and a serious devotion to style. She loves my choice of colors in clothes but detests the fit.

“Rarity, please, these were made in a few hours by copying my work clothes while I slept so I would have something for a Royal Audience the next morning. ‘Something better’ is why I’m here.”

“Very well. Up on the platform!” A tape measure starts flying around me. “Hmmm. Take those rags off.” So I strip down to tighty whities. “You’re not a stallion!”

“Rarity, most of Canterlot would argue that with you right now.”

Twilight is having convulsions trying not to fall down laughing.

Rarity looks back and forth between us, “What is somepony not telling me?”

Swift speaks up, “John and I are recently banded. Due to a series of unusual accidents our honeymoon has become the stuff of legends in Canterlot.”

“Oh. . . . What I was referring to is that we must allow a certain space for accidental expansion when we dress stallions. Otherwise there is a great potential for pain and embarrassment. John doesn’t seem to have that requirement.”

“Actually, I do. I just ‘dress’ down instead of up. The vertical spine has that effect.”

Rarity leans next to Swift, “Darling, you are going to have to fill me in on the details some day.” Coming back to me, “But right now we have this most wonderful opportunity. We can do things with this glorious stallion of yours that we can’t do with any other, starting with showing off those magnificent muscles.”

“Rarity, I need a little fancy dress, some Guard for humans, and a lot of daily work clothes with a light side of house dress. You can have all the fun you want with Swift here.” I figured that for a win-win.

The tape measure flies and some notes and sketches are made. I turn and bend on demand. Finally, “That should do it. We’ll have to do some fitting with a few of the pieces but this will do for most. You can get ‘dressed’.”

“Wait a minute! There’s something else.” I pull my whities down enough to expose my flank. “I want this on a few of the pieces,” pointing to my cutie mark.

“Oh yes. Why would anypony want to cover that up?” And we have another sketch, in color this time.

“Next!”

As Swift mounts the platform I say, “Mares, this is your opportunity to talk about me. I’m going to take a few minutes to run out to the Apple place. Where should we meet back? Here?”

Twilight thought for a moment, “Here, I guess. Unless you run late. About twelve thirty we’ll head for the party. Don’t get lost!”

“No problem.”

I finish dressing and leave the mare talk behind. Back across the square and out the other side of town from the train station should do it. Of course, there’s only about a hundred chances to confirm that as most of Ponyville seems to waiting for me to walk by. I have to turn down a number of offers for an escort because I plan to make up some time when I get out to open country.

Two minutes later I’m walking through the Farm gate. I can see Fred and Big Mac working in the next field over. Fred spots me and shrugs out of the harness as I trot over to meet them.

“Hi there, Big Guy.”

“Fred! You’re learning words.”

“Hello, Big Mac. Fred says your teaching him.”

“Eeyup. Good to talk while working. Gonna plant twice as much next spring.”

“Damned. You too.”

“Eeyup.”

“Can I ‘borrow’ Fred for a minute? I want to try something.”

“Eeyup. Fred says you been learning too.”

“Yes I have. Fred, you up for a race?”

“Yes. To the back of that pasture you raced in before and back to here. Big Mac can call go.”

We line up. “Go.”

Fred kicks off a short yard ahead of me and settles into an easy gallop. I ease up beside him until I catch his eye.

He kicks it up a notch so I kick it up two. I clear the fence just ahead of him and stretch out for a serious run. The wind in my face feels wonderful. The back fence is coming up fast and we u-turn side by side. Less than a minute later we pull up next to Big Mac still side by side.

“WE won!”

“John, I knew Fred could, but you too?”

“Yes. I’m learning a lot of things.”

Big Mac throws me a hoof bump and a big smile, “This is good, John. And the Service too!”

“Big Mac, I’d like to ask you a favor. Swift and I both like the outdoor life and running free. Could we come out here for a vacation? I’d love to do some farm work just for the joy of it and we’d like to camp in the woods sometimes.”

“John, don’t ask, just come. You’re feeling the Earth pony need for the land. And I can show you a couple of great, private camping spots.”

“Thank you, Big Mac. I had the need on Terra too. I think it’s a universal truth.”

That gets me a giant three way hug.

“I hate to run guys but I left Twilight and Swift with Rarity picking out clothes. I need to get back before they overload the train.”

It takes me two minutes to get back to town and fifteen to get across the square. The mares are having tea and gossip.

Swift looks up, “John! How are Fred and Big Mac doing?”

“Very good. Fred is learning words and Big Mac says they’ll double their planting this spring.”

Twilight stares at me, “John. Do you realize what you just said? Big Mac is teaching Fred to talk!”

“Yep. And Fred seems to be drawing Big Mac out. I gather they have conversations while working the fields together.”

“Wait a minute.” Rarity is looking confused, “Are you trying to tell me that you’ve walked to the Apple Farm and back since you left here and had enough time to visit?”

“Well, maybe not ‘walked’ but it was all on foot. Fred and I raced across the farm and back too. I can keep up with him now.”

Rarity stands and walks over inspecting me thoroughly. “I believe you, John Sampson, because there’s no other way you could have collected this much dirt.” And I feel a subtle ‘pop’ on my body and a small ring of dirt falls to the floor around me. As I watch, it forms into a ball and the trash can near the door opens to receive it.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, John. AJ is going to just eat you up.”

Rarity closes the shop door behind us. We had ideas of wandering around town for a few minutes but I notice that almost everypony is drifting toward City Hall.

“My darling mares, I believe that there’s nothing to see because everypony has already left for the show. As ‘the show’ it behooves us get in gear and not disappoint them.” An excess of strong tea has given me a slight edge.

We join the drift. Just as we reach the door, Pinkie comes shooting through from the inside. “Wonderful.Right on time.Just follow me,” taking us through the foyer and main room to the stage.

I’ve never been to a Pinkie Party before so I’m not prepared for the speed.

As soon as we are all on stage Pinkie gets behind Swift and me and pushes us out to the front.

“Here’s the guests of honor! Tell us something about yourself, John Sampson.”

I almost missed it as I am so amazed that Pinkie can enunciate flawlessly.

“I’m sure everypony knows by now that I’m not from around here. I’ve been a lot of places and seen a lot of things. There’s been ups and downs. But none of that matters anymore. I have a wonderful mare, Swift Trail (hugging her to me) and a hall full of friends. All that’s left to achieve perfect happiness is a party. So let’s do it!”

Canons fire confetti from both sides of the stage and balloons fall from the ceiling as the crowd erupts. Pinkie smiles so big I think she is going Cheshire Cat on us.

We mingle. And we eat. And we rub flanks with the great and small of Ponyville. I finally find a pad and just sit. That puts me more at eye level with the rest of the world. Twilight has slipped out to check on her library and Swift has been swallowed by the crowd but I feel her nearby. The citizens of Ponyville are a gregarious lot. I haven’t been asked for anything but friendship yet and I’ve been offered everything. After a few hours I feel a need to stretch. I ease out a side door and lean against the side of the building a few yards away. I turn to the sound of hoofsteps and see Applejack coming from the same door.

“Hello there, Applejack. I haven’t broken my promise to you but things have kinda happened to me.”

“I know that, John. And call me AJ.”

“I like that. I just wanted to be sure it wasn’t reserved for close friends.”

“It is.”

I squat with my back against the wall to put us at the same level. She moves directly in front of me and looks me in the eye from almost nose to nose.

“I want that date.”

Leaning forward, she gently rubs my cheek and shares breath with me.

I stroke her neck with my hand and say, “AJ, you will always be among my first friends no matter what. But you are fast approaching a line that I cannot cross without Swift’s approval.”

“The only question I have is do you want to cross that line, John. Am I somepony that you could love?” And she started nibbling on my ear.

I move away. “Please, AJ, I cannot take any chance at all of hurting Swift. As much as I want this, I must talk to Swift first.”

“John Sampson, hear me. On my Oath as a Bearer, I would never consider harming Swift Trail or you. Swift sent me to ask you.” She seems to glow for a second. “How do you think I knew about the ears?”

“Oh, AJ. I can only plead that I was doubting my own judgment more than I was doubting you.”

“John, this is another lesson in pony living. A stallion doesn’t need a mare. He needs mares, plural. The stronger the stallion, the more and stronger mares he needs. I have seen your heart and soul. You are the strongest stallion that’s been for generations. Equestria needs your bloodline. You won’t stop with me.”

“Very well, AJ. But I have some conditions. At least one date will be private and lengthy. It would probably be best on your farm. You need a full look at just what you are getting yourself into. And we need a serious conversation with Twilight. It won’t be tonight but you know where to find me.”

Then I pull her to me and kiss her deeply and fully.

As we part, “Oh John. I thought Swift was exaggerating.”

“Consider that a sample.”

We make our way back to the party. Swift is watching the door when we walk in. AJ nods and Swift nods back. Rarity and Twilight both smile. Why do I feel like there’s a conspiracy going on?

After thanking Pinkie and arranging delivery from Rarity we pile on to the night train for Canterlot and home. I use my bag as a pillow and Swift uses me for one as we sleep most of the way back.

When we get to the castle gate I pass my bag to Swift and suggest that the mares go ahead while I attend to a quick errand. They agree and when they have moved off I ask the gate guard if Luna is holding Court that night. He says, “Yes.”

I make my way to the Throne room and wait as Luna hears the pleas of a town mayor needing a new road.

“Approach us, Major John Sampson.”

“Your Majesty.” I step forward and bow.

“What hast brought thou, Good Major?”

“Your Majesty I come here tonight as John Sampson, a fool. There have been some recent small disturbances in the Castle caused by myself. Blame has been bandied about by myself and others. I come to place in Public Record the final determination of fault. It is absolutely and fully on me. In my arrogance I failed to appreciate the power and subtlety of Equestrian magic. In my ignorance I spelled myself to the inevitable failing. I’ll never regret the outcome or any subsequent effects but I apologize profusely for allowing my failing to spill over and disturb Yourself or any other of my friends .”

“That be a mighty act of honor, Major John Sampson. Art thou sure thou wishes for it to be a part of Official Record?”

“Absolutely.”

“It is done. Thine words shall be read in the morning’s Royal Proclamation. Perhaps some of thine ‘other friends’ hast some word to add,” looking sharply to Her right.

Celestia and Twilight are standing there in an alcove. Twilight is grinning.

Swift has already hit the bed when I get in. As I settle in behind her she rolls and wraps herself around me without waking. This is what matters. No spells. No hormones. Her naked soul loves me.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Nine )

When the alarm goes off, AJ ‘keeps up with us’ with little effort. Can ‘til can’t is a common farm schedule. I want her with us because I want to expose her to the family life of the Guard. If she joins us, she will be joining the Guard too.

Wanna guess who was waiting for us when we get to the cafeteria? “AJ, this Colonel Steel Will, my boss. Colonel, this is Applejack of Sweet Apple Acres.”

The Colonel stands and gestures, “Have a seat Ma’am. I must confess that I am here to meet you. Your family has been supplying us with apples since I was a raw recruit and we’ve never seen anything but the best. Thank you very much for that.”

“Are you trying to flatter me, Colonel?”

“Call me ‘Steel’. And only as much as you deserve.

“Major, why don’t you and the Captain go get the food while I entertain the Lady.”

I look at AJ, “Any preferences?”

“Can I get a fruit salad with lots of apples?”

“Of course. We’ll be right back.”

I get three eggs with toast and apple slices in addition to AJ’s order. When we return AJ is looking very serious.

“John, Steel has made me a very interesting offer. I won’t consider it unless both of you approve but I think we need to take a good look at it.”

Steel explains, “John, the Guard will do almost anything to accommodate a union between you and Applejack. You both deserve it and the Guard desperately needs more ponies like you. The first thing that comes to mind is building a facility in Ponyville for you to work out of and be able to go home to the farm at night. All of your foals will have Guard funded full scholarships waiting for them.”

“Steel, it’s not a done deal yet. We still have to go spend some time with her family. And we have to finalize some legal issues. But it looks more like fate every time I turn around.”

“Legal issues, John? The Guard has some very smart lawyers.”

“It’s not that level of problem. When you own a farm like AJ’s, you can’t let it fall into conventional patterns of inheritance. If you do, four generations later it will degenerate into a hundred zero point two percent undivided interests and be sold off to strangers. Nor can we simply disinherit foals. So we have to structure a system of trusts to own the assets of the family and protect everypony.”

A very satisfied looking Steel says, “It sounds to me like you are taking care of business in a proper and timely manner. Please notify me of the date of the ceremony. Miss Applejack, please allow me to extend all possible courtesy to you during your stay with the Guard today and in the future.”

As Steel walks out the door to his own day, AJ remarks, “I like him.”

We eat quietly and when we are done I laid out what AJ would see, “This is a piece of my magic and it is more than likely that any foal I sire will inherit it.”

AJ sits calmly and watches while I go through my usual routine with weights. Swift sits with her for most of the time. When we are done and showered I suggest, “I think it would be a good idea to visit Twilight next. We have been studying this and have some ideas.”

AJ is somber, “John, I knew you were ‘unusual’ but this is a little more than I expected. Could I have a foal that could literally hug my head off?”

“In a word, NO. The reason for the whole honeymoon debacle was that even though Swift and I were thoroughly married and much in lust, we didn’t consummate until we had been in a lab with Twilight and Doctor Red. I had to be convinced that I wouldn’t accidentally hurt Swift. This is what Twilight will explain to you in detail. My kind of magic has a built in safety factor. I can’t hurt anypony without a full formulation of an intent to hurt.”

“Is she expecting us?”

“Yes. And AJ, be kind to her. She has a terrible case of parapraxis whenever this band is brought up.”

The doorpony let us right in. Twilight is seated downstairs this time looking quite scholarly and serious. “Hello, AJ, Swift, John. Since we are all here, can I assume that we are moving forward?”

I explain, “We’ve all been given a lot to think about this morning. Please forego all privacy considerations and give AJ as thorough and exact a truth about me as you can.”

Twilight looked to AJ, “What do you want to know?”

AJ thought a moment, “How dangerous is he, really.”

“To you? Not at all. In fact, you’re far safer with him than without him. I really wouldn’t want to be anypony caught trying to harm you or Swift, though.”

“What about his foals. Will they be as strong as he is?”

“Probably. A Unicorn foal might grow up to be as strong as Celestia.”

“And knowing all that ya know, if ya were me, would ya go through with it?”

“Yes I would, absolutely and unequivocally. By accident or by design, he is the best stallion in Equestria right now and you are at least a top ten mare.”

“Thank you, Twilight. He still has to spend some time with the family but Granny is ready to band him herself after what he taught me about using trusts to keep the farm intact and Big Mac liked him from day one. We’ll probably have the ceremony on the farm on the day the family officially approves.”

“Are you going to heartbond like Swift?”

“Yes. Do ya have any advice on a three way?”

“I don’t see any way to do it wrong. It’s basically a good cuddle with a special kind of oath and we all know how good he is with Oaths. Just focus on your love for each other and let ‘er rip.”

We send AJ home on the noon train and hunker down to wait for the lawyers to justify their fees. I have time to learn a lot about Equestria and Swift networks like a fool. It is a pleasant time with nights toggling between mad passion and sweet grooming.

Then ‘The Letter’ came. The papers are ready to sign. When could we be in Ponyville?

We rush through PT the next morning and head for the Clerk's office. I am about halfway through filing out the leave request form when Colonel Steel opens the door and says, “Effective immediately, Major John and Captain Swift are granted one week leave for the express purpose of visiting Ponyville. Any additional time requested will be granted on a week by week basis.”

And we head home to pack.

As the train pulls into the Ponyville station we grab our bags and prepare to debark. AJ had come to Canterlot for our first date so now we are going to her farm for the second and possibly final date. There has been much correspondence and legal negotiation in between but we are coming down to the finish line.

Swift’s saddle bags and my pack are loaded with gear and trail supplies. It is our plan to spend some time with the Apple family then camp in some isolated woods on the backside of the Apple farm. If we choose to go ahead the heartbonding would likely take place while we are camping. There is little chance that we would make it back through town without Pinkie throwing us a reception but that was the price of life in Ponyville.

I was hoping that AJ would meet us in town for lunch but the stationmaster has a note from her informing us that one of her wholesalers in Manehattan has filed for bankruptcy owing her for a year’s apples. It is show up and make a claim right now or forget about a year’s profits. She will be back in a couple of days. It isn’t like Big Mac is a stranger and I will get a little extra time to play with Fred. And we have already waited months for this moment so an extra day or two won’t matter.

Sugarcube Corner gives us a chance to eat and face Pinkie in one quick move. She seems to accept that the date for the banding isn’t set yet but you can never be sure with Pinkie. A quick hike up the road brings us to the front gate of the Apple farm. Every field I can see has been plowed and is set up for planting in spring. That kinda disappoints me. I want to try my back at pulling a plow. I have friends that do it and I never have, at least not the Equestrian way..

Granny Smith is rocking on the porch. She motions us to approach. “Put your stuff in the last room down the hall on the right. Bathroom’s across the hall. Big Mac is in the west four hundred and twenty acres.”

“Thank you, Ma’am.” We drop our luggage in the bedroom and go looking for Big Mac.

As we crest the hill on the west road, we run into a filly headed the other way. “Anypony with a mane that color has to be related to Big Mac,” Swift said.

“And being dead up in the middle of Sweet Apple Acres couldn’t possibly have anything to do with it?” she fired back.

So I pick it up, “I’ll bet it’s Apple Bloom.”

She looks at me and says, “And I’ll bet you’re that human trying to steal AJ.”

Uh oh. “You, my darling filly, are confused. AJ is trying to trap us on the farm.”

“Really?” apparently she likes that idea. “If you’re looking for Fred and Big Mac, they’re about two hundred and fifty yards that way.” pointing west on the road.

“Thank you, Milady.”

She goes on her way giggling and we continue on ours.

Sure enough, just down the road and behind some trees is Big Mac and Fred plowing a field. ‘Plowing a field’, oh boy, I get to try it after all!

“Hello Fred. Hello Big Mac.”

They both shrug out of the harness and come at a full gallop.

“Hey, John! AJ had ta go ta Manehattan. She’ll be back in two days.”

“Yeh, we got her note. We got a week and more for the asking. Did she tell you how the Guard feels about this whole thing?”

“Eeyup.”

“So we’re here for a vacation too. I’ve even been thinking about trying my shoulder against a plow.”

“So pick one, big stallion.”

I strip my shirt off and pass it to Swift. “By the way, we ran into Apple Bloom on the way up here. She is mad at me for stealing AJ but I assured her that AJ is actually trying to trap us on the farm. She likes that idea.”

“John, be careful. She can talk ponies into anything. You may find a bear trap in your bed tonight.” Big Mac warns.

“Okay. I’ll try your plow first.”

I trot over to the single bottom plow Big Mac favors and shrug myself into the harness. It fits fairly well. I take aim on the far side of the field and lean into it. It is a soft bumpy trip because this is a second pass, made at an angle to the first. I am coming back when Big Mac shouts at me.

“Slow down, John. You’re throwing the dirt too far.”

So I stop next to Fred’s three bottom plow and move over into his harness.

It’s a little big on me. But I wrap my arms around the collar so it is against my upper arms and tighten up. I take a step but the dirt just moves back under my foot. I take a deep breath and concentrate, feeling my muscles and my strength flowing down my legs and into the ground. And just walk forward. It isn’t hard and it feels good.

I’ve made eight passes down the field and back when,

I laugh, “Fred, because I love you, I’m going to teach you a valuable lesson. On the strength of your evaluation of me as a ‘show off’, I am going to stop doing your work for you.

“Big Mac! What have you been teaching my horse? I’m shocked.”

Breakfast is apple fritters at six AM in the family kitchen. Granny might be old but she’s no slouch in the kitchen. I am extra hungry. Using my magic has that effect on me.

I quiz Big Mac, “I’d like to find a good camping spot. We can set up and come back here for any work that needs doing. Where do you think we should start?

Big Mac thinks for a moment, “From where we met yesterday, follow the fence line north. In about six hundred yards you’ll cross a creek. Follow the creek east and you’ll find a clearing. It’s a pretty place.”

I get up and started gathering dishes when, “Don’t you touch that!” it was Granny. “I’ll say who touches my dishes and when!”

“Yes Ma’am.” Setting them carefully back on the table.

“Damned stallions. You gotta keep on top of them every minute.” Granny grumbles.

I look at Big Mac. He shrugs, “Eeyup.”

Leaving a few clothes behind, we gather our gear and slip out the back door. It is a pleasant morning with just enough chill to be invigorating. I’ve got my mare by my side and we’re heading out to live wild and free for a while. This is how life should be lived.

We follow Big Mac’s directions and there it is, a little pocket pasture with the creek flowing through it and trees all around. This is where I want to spend eternity with sweet grass, clear water, and protection from the miseries of the world.

I throw the pop tent and anchor it between two trees so we will have shelter if the weather turns but I leave our sleeping pad in the open in front of it. Swift puts our groceries in the tent to discourage curious critters and I strip down to get in touch with my inner pony. We walk out into the grass and just graze for a while. My neck doesn’t let me graze like I want to but I can pick tender blades to chew as I stand beside my mare in our little domain.

I find a spot that looks oh so comfortable so I lay down and roll. Of course, I end up with little bits of crushed grass all over me so Swift comes over and starts picking them off and eating them. I lay there and doze in perfect contentment. After a bit I feel a push between my shoulders. “My turn lover,” Swift says. We trade places and after she rolls, I pick.

Coming up on noon we decide to go back to the house and check in. I start back down the creek when Swift spoke up, “It really does feel like home, doesn’t it?”

I stop, confused, “Well, yes, but why is that significant right now?”

“You haven’t put your pants back on.”

“Do I need them? The trail is clear.”

“What about Bloom?”

“She’s lived her whole life around Big Mac. I’m sure she’s seen balls before.”

“But Big Mac doesn’t walk around at half mast all the time.”

Oh. I had forgotten that. “You’re right. She needs some time to adjust to the human side.” So I go to the tent and put my cargo shorts on.

“Have you realized, John, that this is the first place where you have felt completely comfortable outside? I’m used to the fully natural you but it’s not something you show to many ponies.”

I’m thinking on that as we walk along the fence line. My inner pony is conflicted about hiding anything from ponies I called friend. When we pass the field where Fred and Big Mac were working, I notice that the plows are standing alone. It is definitely lunch time when we get to the house.

Granny is on a tear, “Well now. You seem to have lost some of your clothes in the woods.”

“Granny, I don’t wear clothes at home. I lost all of them for a while.”

Granny eyeballs me carefully, “But you had to put some on to come here?”

“I almost forgot to but Swift reminded me that some of my human idiosyncrasies disturb ponies that are not used to them. If what you are asking is ‘does this feel like home to me?’ the answer is ‘Yes!’”

“Good, then you can wash the dishes.”

That’s Granny. The smallest and weakest in body and always in charge.

Swift puts the dishes up after I wash and Bloom dries. Granny is impressed with how quickly hands can reduce a complex task to a completed job. After all is done we head back up the road after Fred and Big Mac. I spell both of them on a plow while Swift keeps the cool water flowing. I just feel so right with the world working the land with my band. My inner pony is in heaven.

We are nearly done but it is time for dinner and, as it was explained to me, there is no ‘late for dinner’ with Granny. If you are late, there is no dinner. And that would have been truly sad. We have roasted corn, stewed carrots, garden salad, and extreme apple pie.

Granny put me on dish detail again but I make quick work of it. I tell Big Mac that we are going to spend the night in the tent and would probably eat breakfast there then meet him and Fred in the field. He just grins and nods.

As we walk up the road toward the setting sun, side by side with my hand caressing my mare’s withers, I reflect on just how lucky I am.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Ten )

As soon as we get to the tent I discard my shorts. I want to be free! The spot where we rolled earlier has my attention. Swift’s scent on it calls to me so I go and roll there again. I feel so good I jump up and run completely around the pasture, jumping the creek twice. When I get back to the spot, Swift is just getting up from rolling there. I flank bump her as I gallop by, “Come on slowpoke. . .”

We gallop and jump and buck and just generally act like a pair of foals around the little pasture as the sun goes down. I notice that Swift is getting a little winded so I bounce over to our pad and flop down. She joins me in a few seconds.

“My wonderful, wonderful mare Swift, do we have to go back?”

“My magnificent stallion John, would you please refrain from reminding me for as long as you can.”

So we lay there and nuzzle and caress as the full moon begins to rise over us. A cool breeze blows through and I felt a slight chill.

“That wind is cold. I think I need a blanket.”

Swift starts to get up but I grab her and pull her to me.

“Where do you think you’re going, blanket?”

I roll onto my back and drape her over my chest just like we were in the heartbonding. I feel our heart beating in two chests and smile.

“Oh! You want to do it again!” and Swift starts rubbing her cheek against my cheek.

“Yes, my beautiful sexy mare, I want to do it every chance I get!” and I feel a hint of the warmth between us. I rub back and kiss her neck.

“So do I, world’s sexiest stallion.” And she kisses me all the way to the back of my tongue.

I feel the warmth for sure now. I wrap my arms around Swift. “I will never, ever let you go, mother of my foals.”

“Nor I, you, sire of my life” There is a glow around us now.

Swift begins to slip down my chest, nuzzling into my chest hair. “This is my favorite other part of you. You almost have enough hair to make a coat here.” And she nips my nipple.

I gasp and realize that the glow isn’t all that is growing. Her tail is draped between my legs and my erection is expanding against the bare skin on the bottom of it. “My favorite part of you, right now, doesn’t have any hair on it.”

“What, do you imagine that you’re sneaking up on me down there” And she runs the bottom of her tongue round and round on my nipple.

My erection is lifting her tail now. “I see considerable up and down in your future.”

She slides farther down my body planting her hind legs beside my kidneys and rotating her rump as she moves back. I feel wet slickness between us. I bring my hands up and massage her barrel.

She gasps as my erection pokes solidly under her tail. “Getting closer!”

She rises on her hind legs and places her front hooves in my cupped hands. My erection slides down her soft heat until I feel her winking just below my glans. I grip her hooves to give her leverage as her lips suddenly pull open to admit my glans and she rocks back and down. I grunt and she squeals.

Swift bounces wildly up and down on me whinnying loudly as I just gasp and keep reaching up for her glorious depths. She is clamping on me hard enough to stretch me on the upstroke. This isn’t going to last long at all.

I’m beginning to buck up against her when she screams and pulls her hind legs up so she can grind herself into my crotch. I let go of her hooves and grab her barrel to hold her down as I buck up into her. My load surges up my shaft and into her glorious heat as my scream joins hers.

And we are spent. I lower her limp form on to my chest as my limpness falls out of her. Our heart is still pounding and our glow is still there, now subdued but no less real. I lay there fascinated with love made visible. On the wind comes a high pitched whinny.

What is this? An intruder! I gently lay Swift beside me and kiss her forehead. Sitting up I look around. There it is again, west towards the fence line. I stand and step slowly towards it. It’s clearer this time and I know it is calling me.

There is a shadow moving up beside the creek bed. I angle south to cut off any retreat to the woods. She calls again. Yes! Definitely a mare! I answer with a whinny of my own.

I move faster now, circling her. She whinnies again and I answer with some deep guttural grunts, proclaiming my masculinity. She freezes. I walk up to her stiff legged and tall. Her tail is waving wildly. Suddenly she squeals and bolts. I chase after her.

No matter which way she turns, I am in front of her. She is no match for my speed and strength and now she knows it. She stands wild eyed and trembling as I walk up to tower over her. I nicker softly as I sample her intoxicating breath. She is a beauty and her tail is straight up. I am dropping as I sniff her flank.

She stomps but I just flinch a little. She tries to pull her flank away from me but I throw my flank against her shoulder and knock her back around. I move her tail out of the way with my nose and sample her delicacy with my tongue. Raising my head, I close my nostrils and inhale across my tongue to directly assess this mare. She’s ready.

My erection stiffens as I hook my chin across her back and pull her to me. As her butt comes against my chest I lift and step forward. My erection increases to steel hardness and I begin to probe her hindquarters with it. She squeals and tries to wiggle but it’s too late. Her fate was sealed when she wandered into my pasture.

On the third probe I feel warm wetness gush over me so I step forward, sliding up and into her. I move my front legs forward on her body and step forward again. This time I’m buried in her past my medial ridge. Rocking my hips while maintaining a firm hold on her barrel I make long thrusts. My head is over her shoulder and her hind legs splay out to give me the perfect angle to reach her full depth.

I feel myself expand inside her as she begins to spasm and contract. She is squealing and I am grunting as tension builds. She pushes back against me and I feel a bump deep inside her. I quickly fit the socket in the front of my flare over it as the contents of my nuts surge down my shaft from my tail and into her precious heat. I pump and she spasms as we both sing out to the night sky.

It’s over. I’m going limp inside and outside of her. Slowly I slide back and on to my own four feet. She steps three steps forward and squats. Piss flows as I watch. No white. Good. None of my precious seed is wasted. She straightens up and walks away. I step forward and taste her sweet juices. File that under ‘My Second Mare’.

We walk shoulder to shoulder up the pasture towards the camp where My First Mare waits. As we approach, “That was quite loud, John.”

My Second Mare replies, “You should have felt it from this side. Wow!”

There is a meaning here but it eludes me.

“John? . . . . John? . . . .”

My First Mare walks up to me and stands with her hooves against my chest looking into my eyes. Stands up to reach my chest? I am vertical? And something snaps.

“Huh? What is going on?”

“Welcome back, John.”

“AJ?”

AJ looks hard at me, “If you tell me you don’t remember what just happened I’m going to kick you clean into the next century.”

“Don’t worry, AJ. I remember every magnificent second in glorious detail. That’s the problem. What I remember isn’t possible. Swift, hold it for a moment. AJ, what happened from your point of view?”

“I came up the fence line while the sun was just barely still up. I saw you two bouncing around the pasture like foals and I just had to stop and watch. When you moved up by the tent I began to walk up the creek but the going was slow because the sun was down and the moon still low. Then you two began to glow. In a while you were glowing enough to make it easy to see what you were doing. You were getting noisy anyway and I didn’t want to interrupt. As the glow got brighter I realized that I was looking at love so strong it manifests in the physical world. It’s something that I dreamed about as a filly. My heart was crying out for that love so when you were done, I called softly to John.”

“How did you call me? By name?”

“I’m not sure. I was pretty emotional at that point. But after I called a few times you got up and started toward me. I watched you take every step but when you got to me you were a big pony stallion. I tried to run but there was no way. You herded me up and wore me down like it was nothing. You were bigger than Big Mac and had a will I couldn’t resist. You mounted me, fucked me for a couple of minutes, flared and we had the most incredible orgasm together.”

“That’s pretty much what I felt. I had four feet, a sheath, a flehmen, a flare, and a pure instinct to claim this mare that had wandered into my pasture. What did you see, Swift?”

“I was pretty much out of it after you orgasmed me to exhaustion. I woke at the sound of two ponies whinnying loudly. I looked around and saw a large moving shadow in the center of the pasture. It separated into two distinct shadows and they milled around for a few seconds then moved this way. As you approached I made out who you were.”

“That doesn’t give us much. I can only guess that my inner pony got out. We’ll have to talk with Twilight about this.”

AJ looks deadly serious, “John, if she threatens to cure you, tell me. I’ll stop her.”

I sit down and gesture for both mares to get comfortable in front of me. “AJ, are you ready to make it official?”

She smiles and says, “If we’re not banded after that fucking you just put on me, I’m not sure what banding is.”

“That’s what we are doing right now, AJ, detailing the banding for you. Put your hoof on my chest until you can feel my heart and leave it there.”

“Okay, I feel it.”

Swift moves to lean against me.

“Now put your other hoof on Swift’s chest and feel her heart.

“Notice anything?”

“No matter how long I wait, your hearts always beat exactly together.”

“Not quite, AJ. There is only one heart there. We share it. That is the true meaning of the heartbond.”

“I thought that was just poetry.”

“Most ponies do, AJ. That’s why we’re having this conversation. There are some advantages. We always know where each other are. We can feel it. And it’s the basis of that glow you saw.”

“It’s what I felt when I was watching you, isn’t it?”

“If it is meant to be, you will be drawn to it.”

AJ looked thoughtful for a moment, “There’s no going back, is there?”

“Not once the bonding is done. If you have any misgivings we can wait and have a civil union for now.”

“No. I can feel your heart calling me. I couldn’t live knowing I had walked away from a love like this.”

“Then come with me.”

We walk over to where Swift and I have created a small hollow in the ground by rolling.

“I will be on bottom because I'm the biggest. I want one of you on each side of me covering half of my chest.”

I lay down and spread my arms wide. Swift snuggles up on my left and AJ on the right.

I ask, “AJ, why are we here?”

She replied, “My heart needs to feel your heart.”

I feel the stirring. She begins to rub one side of my face while Swift rubs the other. They take turns kissing me as the glow brightens. I feel our heart stretching toward AJ. We can feel AJ’s heart beating. It is coming into alignment with our heart. The warmth is rising both on my cheeks and in our bodies. Suddenly Swift and AJ meet on my mouth. We are locked in a three way kiss when AJ’s heart locks in and becomes one with ours. I wrap them together with my arms and hold us tight together as the glow envelopes all three of us. We lay there basking in the perfection of the moment.

We wake some time later. It is still dark as I carefully unwrap from my mares. We all stand and stretch. I can feel AJ just like I feel Swift. It is wonderful.

AJ speaks first, “I can feel both of you! I can close my eyes and you are still there as surely as if I were staring at you in bright sun.”

Swift smiles, “Yeh, AJ, it’s pretty nice and it works no matter the distance. It’s simply impossible to ever be alone again.”

“My sweet mares, why don’t we ease back up to the camp. I am feeling like I could use a little food and drink.”

When we get there, Swift heads into the tent for supplies and I sit on the pad with AJ next to me. I start grooming her mane. She closes her eyes and stretches across my lap.

Swift comes back, “We have trail bars and apple cider.”

I take a long swig of the apple cider with one hand then offer it to AJ. She declines. I take a bite out of a trail bar and offer it to her. She takes one too and sits there chewing as I continued to groom her mane with the other hand.

A few bites of trail bar later AJ looks at Swift, “Don’t let me monopolize John.”

Swift smiles back, “AJ, this is your honeymoon. It is my pleasure to see you enjoy yourself as much as I did on mine.”

I start working both hands down AJ’s neck, massaging as I go. She starts melting on me so I pull her up until she is sitting in my lap with her shoulder against my chest. I bend down and nibble on her upper lip. She gasps and I go in with a full tongue kiss. She straightens up and kisses back. I put my hands behind her head and use my thumbs to massage the base of her ears as I continue to kiss her. She melts again so I ease forward and slide her off me and onto the pad while keeping the kiss going. I am leaning over her now as she begins to pant. I pull back a little and lightly trace a nostril with my tongue.

Her eyes snap open looking directly into mine as I say, “I want you to know something. What we are doing now is the human way. Humans make an art of drawing out their lover’s pleasure. As you become accustomed to this way you will find ever greater heights of pleasure. I want you to look forward to this.”

In the background Swift speaks, “Listen to him, Honey, he means it.”

I feel our heart pound harder. AJ begins tremble as I caress her cheek. I begin kissing and nibbling down her long equine neck while I dig my fingers into the base of her mane. She begins arching and thrusting involuntarily so I slip between her legs and let her grind into my belly. She abruptly clenches her hind legs around my back and hooks her front legs over my shoulders as she spasms wildly through her first orgasm. I let her peak then set her softly back on the pad.

“That’s one, AJ.” And I began nibbling and snuffling her chest as my hands caress both sides of her barrel. Our heart rate soars so I drop directly to her teats. I suck her nipple into my mouth and bite it hard enough to make it sting a little then I begin twiddling it with my tongue. She screams and begins to buck wildly again. I am riding it out when she hooks her hind legs behind my head and begins to grind herself on my face. I managed to stab her with my tongue several times and get a mouthful of her nectar but her clitoris eludes me. We ride her peak back down and pause for a moment.

“That’s two, AJ”

“I’m sorry, John. I didn’t mean to get all messy on you like that.”

“Really? Cause I did. And I’m going to do it again. By the way, I can actually taste the apples.”

This time I go straight for the clitoris, and get it. I lick it hard for several strokes and it pokes out at me so I wrap my lips around it and suck. It is far enough in my mouth for some careful nibbles and tongue twiddles when AJ starts humping again. I ran my tongue up her inner curve and into her tunnel just in time to receive a double mouthful of nectar. I have to come up for air and she takes advantage to somehow get her hind legs under my arms and around my chest. She starts jacking herself underneath me and down my body. When I raise myself on my arms to take some of the weight off of her, she slips her front legs under my arms and wraps them around my chest pulling herself against me. She kisses me as she grinds herself against my crotch seeking my erection. Her ankles are digging into my back when I feel hot breath on my ear. She licks twice then bites. My erection goes ‘pop’ and she captures it with a vengeance. We both grind and thrust as she chews on my ear until I pin her to the pad, bellow, and unload everything from my toes up into her.

“Uh, John. . . . Hey, John?”

“Wha?”

“You’re heavy, John.”

“Oh. . . .” And I raise up and roll left.

“AJ, you are one damned hot mare.”

“Thank you, John. I have a great teacher.”

Abruptly we have applause from the sidelines. “Hey, you two are so good I got off way over here.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Eleven )

It has been a night to remember. My band now has two mares and I have a rare aroma.

“Swift, it’s time for soap. Meet us in the creek.”

It wasn’t much of a body of water but it flows and will cleanse us.

I step in and, “Oh! Shit! That’s cold.” Then I have an idea. My magic can make my body strong and it can make my body fast, can it make my body warm? I feel for my magic and think about a pleasant warmth. It works! I am standing in the creek and it feels quite comfortable.

Swift arrives with the soap and I start lathering. First myself, then AJ, and finally Swift with lots of scrubbing. We all roll and splash to rinse. We gallop to dry off. It isn’t perfect but I am not about to face Granny reeking of sex.

AJ is looking thoughtful, “John, you’re using our shared heart to gauge my response to your lovemaking, aren’t you.”

I smile, “AJ, that is exactly what I love most about you. You are very, very far from stupid.”

She blushes a little, “Thank you, John. What I haven’t figured out is how you can stand there bare skinned in the cold water and wind and not shiver. I can feel it on my bare parts.”

“Your bare parts are all extra sensitive ones and I have found a new way to use my magic.

“What do we have for breakfast? Or do you think we could make the house in time? For that matter, do they know you are out here, AJ?”

Swift replies, “We can open a bag of fruit or trail bars and we are standing in a sea of greens. I don’t care if we could make the house, I’d rather not see Granny or Bloom right now.”

AJ contributes, “I agree about the house. I’d rather have some work sweat on me when I see Granny. And I spoke to Big Mac only. When he told me where you had gone, I tried to catch up.”

“Okay. I’ve had trail bars so I’m going with the fruit.”

It is unanimous.

When we got back to the field where Big Mac and Fred are working, they are already toiling away. Big Mac sees us first and comes galloping toward us.

“Hello Brother and Sister in Law.”

I am curious, “Now how do you know if we went through with it?”

“John, do ya think Ah can’t recognize my own sister’s voice? You guys are loud. Ya might want ta watch ya’self around Granny.”

Oh. That again. “Is she that mad?”

“Na. She has plans for ya. She walked around all morning ‘Finally! A stallion that knows how ta make a mare squeal’.”

“Hello Fred. Yes, much happy.”

“We’re working on it, Fred.”

“Let me pull your plow for a while, Fred. I want to smell like work when I see Granny.”

Meanwhile Big Mac is quizzing AJ while Swift giggles.

I can’t resist, “Hey Big Mac. If you want secrets, you’re asking the wrong pony.”

“Really?”

“Yes, for example, would you believe that your sister actually tastes like apples.”

Oh my. That may be a new record dark blush. “You wanted to know secrets, Big Mac.”

AJ is deadly serious, “John Sampson! Don’t ya dare.”

“AJ, he listened to all three of us last night. He knows.”

But Big Mac isn’t done, “Actually, John, Ah heard four of ya. That’s what Ah was wondering about.”

“Don’t worry about it. My inner pony just got out for a romp with AJ.”

“Ya have an ‘inner pony’, John?”

“I’ve had him since my Oath but this is the first time he’s got out. Even so he is still me.”

“Ya are confusing, John.”

I get in a couple of hours taking turns on the plows while Swift and AJ clean a barn somewhere. We meet back at the house for lunch. There are glazed carrots and corn pone bread with garden greens.

Granny starts in almost as soon as we are seated. “I’ll be expecting foals next spring. This farm needs more ponies.”

Of course I got dish duty again.

The field work is finished and we brought the plows back with us before lunch. Nothing else needs doing immediately so we decide to go shopping in Ponyville. I want to get Rarity working on a matching wardrobe for AJ. AJ wants to get me the hat that I had been promised long ago. Swift just wants to watch me trying to deal with Pinkie.

Rarity was almost too helpful. “Congratulations Darlings! Of course I know what John already has and I know AJ’s measurements so I can put together anything you want. I’ll even leave some extra in it to be let out.”

AJ has to ask, “Why would I need to let anything out?”

Rarity just smiled, “Honey, by this time next year you are going to be huge.”

My turn, “Rarity, that decision hasn’t been made yet. I don’t want her stuck in the castle and I haven’t been reassigned to Ponyville yet.”

“Well, you’ve still got a few weeks to get it together. Besides, she won’t need you after that first week.” Rarity chides.

I still don’t know if Rarity was serious.

House of Hats is our next stop. It is fascinating to me that ‘Stetson hat’ is a universal constant, but that doesn’t mean that a store in Ponyville would necessarily stock my size. So we agreed on a color and style. My measurement is taken. And we are told to expect delivery in two weeks.

Then there is the third and final errand. It is better to face Pinkie with a united front at a time of our choosing than to have her ambush us one at a time. So Sugar Cube Corner is the last stop.

We settle at a table and Mrs. Cake immediately comes bustling over.

“I’ve been hoping you three would come through here. Tell me now, are the stories true?”

AJ smiles and replies, “If the stories have love and a happy band in them, yes.”

“Oh! Pinkie will be ecstatic.” Mrs. Cake squeals. “What do you want to eat?”

Swift goes with a cinnamon roll and tea, I get blueberry muffins and tea, AJ wants apple pie and tea. We have just started eating when a small tornado blows in.

“Oh Boy!Congratulations!We need a Party!Right Now!!” Confetti started flying (and getting into all our food) and balloons appeared. “It’s SOOoooo Wonderful!!!”

I venture, “We think so. And Swift and I may, may, be moving back to Ponyville.”

“Yes!We will be so happy to have you here.We’ll throw you the biggest party yet!Where will you be living?”

“We don’t know yet. Possibly a new place. We don’t even know when, Pinkie.”

“Okee Dokee.Let me know when it’s time.” and the tornado moves on.

Dinner is a lot like lunch and breakfast is a lot like dinner and the rest of our week passes in a blur of familial love and grooming with a couple of trips to our pasture heaven. My inner pony is contented and quiet. But we have to strike camp and head back to Canterlot. Apple Bloom agrees to loan me AJ for a few days so AJ can come with us for a chance to get organized and legal with the Guard. And we owe some of our comrades a chance to get to know AJ.

The train car is empty except for us so we just pile and nap our way back to Canterlot. At the Palace gate I check us in as the Major John Sampson band. That gets some raised eyebrows and knowing smiles. I guess I just added a line to my legend.

There were two messages waiting. The Colonel wants to see all of us at the first available regular office hours. And Princess Celestia wants to see me in a private audience before the next regular public audience. There are several ‘regular office hours’ left in today and we want to see the clerk anyway so that’s where we go.

She announces us to the Colonel when we walk in the door. As we walk by she informs us that all the papers are ready and lack only signature and date.

“Congratulations, Applejack, John, Swift. Your presence is requested tomorrow from lunch until, in the Officer’s Garden for an informal welcome of Applejack to the Guard herd.”

AJ actually blushed, “Colonel, I’m honored. Just call me ‘AJ’.”

Steel smiled, “AJ, Outside of Royal Court, I’m always ‘Steel’ to you. You have papers to sign and an ID waiting for you. You are entitled to all food, shelter, medical care, and transportation that the Guard can offer in addition to the previously detailed benefits for your foals. I suspect that are already entitled as an Element Bearer but this lets you claim it without advertising as much. Because we are Princess Celestia’s personal Guard, it will get you similar consideration from any other Service or Agency. The Guard is a very large herd.

“Steel, there is one potential bump in that plan. I have a morning Audience with Celestia. I have no clue what She wants or how long I will be occupied.” I warned.

“John, She knows about this gathering and approved.”

“Okay, that works. By the way, we would like to spend the spring season on the farm. We don’t have to worry about noise complaints that way.”

Steel openly laughed at that. “You don’t know, John? Your apartment has permanent extra heavy duty noise canceling spells in the walls and self closers on the doors. We’re ready for you.”

AJ is laughing now, “I told you I liked him. Steel, you’ll be pleased to know that Granny Smith has approved of John based on him being ‘a stallion that knows how to make a mare squeal’.”

Time to change the subject, “Steel, do you happen to know if Twilight is available?”

“Not today but she will be there tomorrow at the gathering. That’s one of your beneficial side effects. We now have a Princess with an interest in the lives of her Guard ponies.”

We complete our business and go to our apartment for some quiet grooming and consideration of the day’s events. After dinner, we retire to the bedroom as one happy pony pile.

Morning is the usual zero four hundred start followed by breakfast but then I take a different turn.

“I’m going to skip PT today. I feel like between pulling a plow and all the horizontal calisthenics, I’m in good enough shape to skip one. Instead I’m going to Royal Court. I might get to say hello to Luna but at least I’ll be early enough for ‘before regular public audience’.”

I walk into the Throne Room just in time to see Luna rising from Her Throne.

As She spotted me, “John Sampson, come and walk with me.”

I follow her up some stairs and out onto a balcony.

“Thou art timely. The hour is here for me to lower My Moon and My Sister to raise Her Sun. Stand and watch.”

I am used to magic auras but this is something different. A column of magic so dense it looks like a solid deep blue bar emanates from Her horn and cradles the Moon. As She lowers the Moon below the horizon, I become aware of an equally solid golden column rising from the other end of the balcony. Celestia is raising Her Sun. It’s an interesting feeling to have your nose rubbed in the fact that some of your friends are a literal force of nature. It kinda puts your own ‘super powers’ in perspective.

Celestia calls, “Hail Sister. May I borrow your human pony for a while?”

Luna smiles at me and replies, “If thou promises to take good care of him.”

So I go with Celestia down some stairs and a hall to an ordinary kitchen.

“Have a seat, John. We are here today to talk as a mare concerned about her protege and adopted filly and a potential suitor.”

“Your Majesty . . .”

“Forget the Throne. This is Celestia the mare speaking to John the stallion.”

“Celestia, I am planning to speak with Twilight today. I have a magic problem I need her advice on. I also want to find a private way to speak with her about our relationship. I know she has a crush on me and I know that it is for the wrong reasons.”

“So what do you intend to do about it, John?”

“I have previously told her that I could refuse to spend time with her because it would be harmful for her. She has never questioned my judgment in the matter, but she has made it abundantly obvious that she wants to join my band. She’s reflexively stood for me a couple of times.”

“She has asked me for advice. I have yet to answer her. I could deny her permission and relieve you of this burden.”

“I have thought of asking you for exactly that but there are other considerations. A foal out of Twilight by me would become an awesome pony and she could have that by invoking Royal Privilege. Would I be doing Equestria a disservice by refusing?

“There is another possibility. I could invoke Royal Privilege myself and simply outrank her. Luna and I have discussed which of us should be first covered by you.”

“Celestia, I would be honored beyond all imagination but I would beg you not to ask me to neglect my bonded mares.”

“Of course not, John. You would all simply move into Royal Quarters for a week or so. Regardless of the size of my horn or title, my body is a normal pony mare. The four of us could keep the castle entertained for a week.”

“Can I break this to my mares gently? We were planning to spend the season on AJ’s farm, lost in the woods.”

“This is just speculation at this point. Think about the possibilities and get back with me. Meanwhile, we should move to the Throne Room where my first official act of the day will be an assignment for you.”

We walk to Celestia’s Throne. She takes Her seat there. I bow and speak, “Major John Sampson reporting, Your Majesty.”

“Major, we require your advice. A project has been proposed to build a direct rail line from Baltimare to Fillydelphia. It could save a lot of time traveling between the cities and allow easy access to the coast. The Royal Treasury would finance this project. We wish to be sure this money is wisely spent. You will be summoned when the proposal is weighed in Royal Court. There will be at least a week to study it.”

A large binder next to Celestia’s Throne floats to me and I capture it in my hands.

Celestia speaks again, “Go, Major John Sampson and do whatever is needed to give me an accurate appraisal.”

I walk absently to my office thinking about almost everything but the proposal.

Swift is at her desk sorting mail. I go by and drop the binder on my desk.

“We have our first official assignment. It looks boring but I have a feeling that it’s not going to be. But first we have a band problem to consider.”

I go through to the kitchen and find AJ hard at work. Swift is right behind me.

“AJ, Celestia has given me an assignment. Swift will help me with it and there is very small chance that we may go to Fillydelphia. But there is also something concerning all of us and we must keep it absolutely confidential.

“I know you have noticed that Twilight has a thing for me and that I don’t approve. The spring season is bringing it to a head. She has asked Celestia about joining our band or invoking Royal Privilege. I want your opinions and ideas. Am I overreacting? Could we make a go of it together? How would you feel if she demanded that I service her. Could you live with the consequences if I refuse?”

AJ speaks first, “John, you will always have a place on the farm. That is a given. I know that Twilight has magic but I have stood up to her before. IF she did invoke Royal Privilege to take you from me I would fight the Guard and Celestia Herself to stop her. But I can’t see that happening. And too many ponies from Steel to Celestia are just too smart to allow it.

Swift agrees, “What she said. And I think Twilight is more mature than you give her credit for. It’s her way to speculate wildly but she always comes back to sensible in the end. We could make it work but right now isn’t the time for it.”

I nod at AJ, “You are spot on, AJ. Celestia has offered us three options. First, She will do nothing unless a major disaster erupts. Second, She can forbid Twilight to have any relationship with us beyond the professional. And third, She could invoke the Royal Privilege Herself and simply outrank Twilight.”

Swift is the first to recover, “John, you know that I don’t think that now is the time for a foal. And that I have sworn to give everything for Celestia. So doing without you for a week wouldn’t be the end of the world for me as long as I have you for the other fifty one weeks. But I would much prefer the second option.”

AJ was uncertain, “I’ll prefer the second option too but I have to admit that being chosen by Celestia Herself is a high honor. Is there an intermediate choice?”

Damned AJ is good, “Now that you have had a chance to experience the shock like I did, let me tell you what some of that really means. The only way Twilight would be allowed to exercise her Royal Privilege is to join us as a band for the week. She can compel us to let her in but she can’t take anypony’s band rights away. In the end, she can’t force me to have an erection so there are limits.

“What Celestia is offering is far more interesting. Basically, we have a standing invitation, as a band, to spend the week with Her or Luna in the Royal Quarters where they will use their magic to make sure everypony has the best possible experience. I get a strong impression that the Sisters plan to alternate bearing foals so there is no chance of a Royal Duty being neglected.

“Right now this is all speculation, Celestia’s very words. We are to consider our feelings and options. Our personal choices will be respected but this is a larger concern than just one band or just one season. Apparently my balls have become an Equestrian national resource.”

My stomach is on the clock and reminds me that there is a gathering I can’t miss. I open the door from the kitchen to the courtyard. There are already tables set up and a few ponies stirring. AJ says, “Come here you two.” and gives us two apple pies each. We locate the dessert table and set them down.

Steel comes over to see what was going on and exclaimes, “What are you doing? This is your party, AJ.”

“Steel, this is Applejack of the Apple herd on the Sweet Apple Acres farm, developers and growers of the finest Apples in all of Equestria. You are not going to get her near a crowd without showing off her apples. Just accept that.” I explain.

That gets several laughs. I get a beer and find a place to sit. Steel joins me.

“Steel, I have a powerful need for some stallion advice. Sometime soon we might slip into my office for a private moment or two.”

“John, I simply cannot believe that you would have any sort of stallion problem. Let’s get a spare beer and go there right now. This has got to be one for the record books.”

So we do and after I make sure the doors are locked we settle in for discussion.

“Steel, this must remain absolutely confidential. I mean burn before reading secret.”

“Now you are worrying me, John. Yes I will keep your secrets. No matter how serious the failing.”

“Oh, Steel, would that it was a failing. That private audience with Celestia this morning, it was regarding Royal Privilege.”

Steel stands and comes over to me. “John! Let me be the first to hoof bump you. That’s great. . . . Isn’t it?”

Something in my face must have clued him.

“John, which one is it?”

“Twilight. The problem is that it’s my technology that turns her on, not me or my love.”

“So? She has done a pretty good job of bringing up Spike. You know she has raised him from an egg, right? And any foal sired by you out of the strongest magician of our time will be incredible. I’ll even bet good money that your mares will deliver you to her if requested.”

“Actually, she would have to share me with them. It’s in the modern rules. We would probably just move in with her for the week.”

“John, you know that there are a lot of spells? Stamina spells. Enhancement spells. Fertility spells. Anti-fertility spells. And Twilight knows every single one of them. You have just been offered every stallion’s dream of heaven. The only possible way it could get better is if Luna or Celestia made it.”

“I know all that but I have some misgivings. She wants more and not sure I can just walk away from a foal. I would really like to talk to Shining Armor about life as a Consort but I can’t see traveling halfway across the world to do it.”

Steel grinned big, “Well me laddie, you are in luck. In a couple of weeks Cadance will be here preparing for heat week. Where Cadance goes, Shining Armor goes. Do you think you can control yourself until then?”

“Hey, is it my fault the mare goes into standing heat looking at me?”

“Are you serious, John?”

“Twice now.”

“I’ll make sure Shining sees you as soon as he gets here. By the way, you know that Shining is Twilight’s big brother, right?”

When we get back outside Twilight is there and getting lost in apple pie. I mingle for a while and tell jokes universal to Services everywhere. Finally, I get a moment with Twilight.

“Twilight, can we talk for a few minutes? I have a question or three and we could step into my office for some private time to discuss it.”

“Sure, John. Though if it gets too complicated we may have to continue it tomorrow.”

“Not a problem. Follow me.”

She gets comfortable and I close the door.

“Has AJ mentioned her experience with my alter ego?”

“She said something about your ‘inner pony’ but seemed unable to go into detail.”

“I’ve had my ‘inner pony’ since my Oath. He seems to be getting stronger but so am I. I’ve found I can use my magic in some interesting ways like keeping warm and I have become very pony in some respects. I loved pulling a plow on AJ’s farm. My greatest happiness is grooming my mares. I don’t get sexually stimulated in situations that would drive a human wild. And then a shrill whinny in the night drove me to capture and cover AJ. It would have been simple enough to explain but I had a sheath and a flare. I flehmened. I had four hooves. And AJ felt all of these things just like I did. But it was still me. I lasted for a human length of time and I have the memories to prove it. Explanations?”

Twilight takes a deep breath, “The obvious explanation is that as you increasingly apply your magic to your body, your subconscious gains similar access. If you learn to control it, you could become the foundation of another tribe. Or you could just be creating a really good illusion. I don’t have any way to know that answer without actually watching you do it.”

“Twilight, it wouldn’t bother me a bit to move into the pony body and stay there. He’s quite a stallion. But when I was him, I was much more instinctual. My intellect was mostly just along for the ride. That worries me.”

“John, I’d still need to either observe him directly or have full access into your mind to find him.”

“You know I can’t do that, Twilight. You’ve only seen the smallest hint of some of the demons that live in there and it freaked you out. I will not be an agent of harm to you.

“On a related note, I have been told that you want something from me. You will only get it with my consent. To obtain my consent you must ask explicitly and offer terms. Ask AJ to detail the kind of agreement that we have and take it as an example. Don’t waste too much time though.”

“John, what are you suggesting?”

“Do you want a foal?”

“I want you, John.”

“No you don’t. You want my database. You can’t have it. You could have a foal.”

“Are you offering me a place in your band?”

“No. You can have complete friendship with loyalty. You can have inheritance. You can have economic merger. And you can have foals. You cannot have the band.”

Dammit. She’s going to cry.

“Could I ever have a chance? Is there something I could do?”

“No. I am very sorry but a choice I made before I fully understood it has closed that door forever.”

Yep, waterworks fully engaged. And I’m a sucker for it. So I pick her up and sit back on my beanbag with her wrapped in my arms and bawling on my shoulder. We rock for a while.

“John, why not?”

“Twilight, put your ear against my chest and tell me what you hear. I’ll give you a clue, the doctor heard it.”

“I know you are heartbonded, John.”

“Good. Now how many mares do you think I could support?”

“I don’t know that there is a theoretical limit. Practically, with a few other stallions to help, about forty or fifty.”

“I calculated thirty. But remember that all my band heartbonds. Now, Twilight, how long do Alicorns live?”

“Alicorns are functionally immortal.”

“So you want to go through eternity with twenty nine thirtieths of your heart ripped out by the roots?”

Waterworks into hyperdrive. It takes a while this time.

“I’m sorry Twilight. So very, very sorry. All I can do is seek a solution and I will for as long as I am able.”

“Thank you, John. I was so focused on what I wanted that I never thought it through.”

“Twilight, I’m sorry. . . .”

“No, John. I’m an Alicorn. It’s my fate. I will talk to AJ about contracts and foals. It may not be this year but someday I will bear your foals. You are far too great a stallion to leave unused.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twelve )

The afternoon was a success. AJ’s pies drew comments both for their quality and her generosity. Everypony at least stopped in to say hello. And I got some important business done. So why do I feel like stepped on shit?

We have made it to the bedroom and are piled on the pad but I’m not resting. AJ and Swift both know something is wrong and are holding me close.

I am looking for some comfort, “AJ, Twilight is going to talk to you about our trust and foals. I have decided that she can have a foal whenever she wants one if she will set up something legal to give the foal our name and heritage. She has accepted this after I explained why she can never be a member of our band. That’s what we were doing this afternoon. She cried a lot.”

Swift squeezes me, “We noticed that she looked somber after talking to you. I told several mares that you had been on Celestia’s business earlier and that this was probably related.

“Oh, Swift, my intuitive wonder, you are exactly right. But it makes it no less painful.”

“Can you tell us, John?” Swift asked.

“Sure. There’s nothing secret about it and you need to know. Just don’t blame me if you cry. We heartbond. It’s the strength of our band. Have you thought about what is going to be like when one of us dies? When we have a part of our own heart ripped out by the roots?”

AJ speaks up, “But we know the bond will still be there when we get to the other side of death. We will be reunited in time.”

“AJ. Swift. Twilight is an Alicorn. How long do Alicorns live? Right. Joining our band would be condemning Twilight to an eternity of pain after we ripped out part of her heart and moved on.”

We all cried ourselves to sleep that night.

I decide to speak with Luna instead of PT in the morning. Two days in a row isn’t ideal but we are on a deadline. My timing is, again, perfect and I join the sisters on their balcony again. When it is done, Celestia asks, “Do you have news for me, John?”

I reply, “I’m here primarily for Luna’s expertise but you should know that the issue with Twilight is fully resolved. I have told her how to have foals without invoking Royal Privilege and why she can never be a part of our band. She is not happy but she is in agreement. She could probably use some consoling.”

Luna looks directly at me, “Thou art a wonder to me, John Sampson. A stallion dictating the affairs of a Princess is unheard of.”

“Show me a private place and I will explain.”

So we go down the stairs and two halls to a sitting room that I suspect is part of Luna’s private quarters.

When are seated Luna leans toward me and dials up the Royal focus, “Tell me, John, how dost thou come to refuse a Princess Her due.”

“Luna, I came here to ask you to examine my soul. Please look as deeply as you dare. I refused Twilight’s request to join our band and I would refuse you or Celestia just the same. Neither my desire nor yours has any relevance in this. We are heartbonded. I could not condemn anypony, much less one I loved, to an eternity of loss when we all died and She didn’t.”

I do believe I see a tear forming.

“Luna, you have my friendship, my loyalty, and my love. I will give you foals for no more than an agreement to give them their heritage. You are welcome among us at will or we will come here just to be social with you. All is yours for a simple asking, except our heart. We would deny you that not for any reason but your own sanity.”

The focus is gone but the tear is definitely there. So I move to sit next to her and offer my shoulder. She grabs me with an unexpected strength and I feel a small sob pass. All I can do is hold her and wait.

“John, it has been many generations of ponies since I have felt the embrace of a stallion as anything but a living dildo. Thank you. I may send for thou some day but it must be done with the utmost discretion. All of my other ponies worship me and I cannot break that mystique. But thy came here with a problem of thine own. What be it?”

“I have an alter ego. I call him my inner pony. He’s been there since my Oath and I feel his influence in my daily life. I feel and act more pony than human in many respects. Sometimes I have to consciously invoke my human nature. None of these are bad things. But while we were camping on AJ’s farm, he got out and took control. My intellect was an observer while he chased down and covered AJ in an instinctive manner. The strange part is that I was physically a full pony. I had all the physical attributes of a pony stallion right down to four hooves. AJ verified every one of them. I need to know just what he is and if I can control him. My hope is that you could put me in touch with him in a dream. And Luna, my band knows I came here to explore my dreams. We have time for some grooming afterward.”

“Lay back and make thyself comfortable, John.”

I do and She touches Her horn lightly to my forehead. Then She steps back, “Where should we look for thy other self?”

We are in the same room but there is a difference. Then I realize that there are no shadows. I am dreaming. “Perhaps the last place that I saw him, the hidden pasture on Aj’s farm.”

“Picture it for me.”

The world ripples and flows and we are there.

Call thy inner pony.”

I whinny and look around. I whinny again and get an answer. He steps out of the woods right behind where our tent had been. I have never looked at him before and AJ had only seen him on a dark night. In the daylight I recognize him instantly. “Fred?”

“What in the hell are you doing here, Fred?”

“You are helping me? How?”

A long and complicated conversation follows. Getting complex ideas into one word sentences isn’t easy. The short of it is that when I took my Oath and declared my desire to be a pony Fred was already linked to me and decided to help. My ‘inner pony’ is an image of Fred given to me as a pattern for my pony self. Fred is helping me by demonstrating equine ways using the Fred pattern. At the same time he is tapping my knowledge of verbal thinking and memories to help him understand ponies and communicate with me. It is a damned clever use of a limited resource and beneficial to both of us. But our direct conversation had to end.

“Okay, Fred. Thank you and please do this again.”

“He’s awake now. That was a very interesting discussion, John.”

“Yes it was. Luna, while we are here I would like to try something. Would you mind a bit of grooming?”

“Not at all, John.”

Her mane is like liquid magic. I don’t know what I could do with it but when I feel for the neck, it’s solid. Starting at the base of Her ears, I scratch and massage with my fingers along the base of Her mane. About a third of the way down Her neck She suddenly leans into me and starts chewing. I put both hands on that spot and She leans harder and begins to moan.

I massaged my way down both sides of Her neck. When I get to Her withers, I feel Her breath on the back of my neck. She begins grooming me one hair at a time. I start on Her back but I run into Her wings.

“Luna?”

“Uhmmm”

“I’ve never had to deal with wings before. You’ll have to tell me how.”

“Just be sure each feather is clean and in line with the others. Thou can’t do any harm to me so try what ye will.”

I don’t how long we spent in that place because dreams are timeless but my body eventually made a tea related demand on me.

When I return She is smiling. “That is a great gift, John Sampson. May I call on thou in thy dreams from time to time?”

“Of course. That is the intent behind this little experiment. This makes discretion much simpler. Remember that I cannot lie to my mares but I am sure they would never begrudge either of us a sweet dream.”

I take the binder apart and begin to break the proposal into manageable chunks. When I have the whole of a piece, I give questions from it to Swift for research. We exercise some Pegusi couriers for several days then the picture begins to come together. There is a clear pattern of waste. I can’t prove that anypony is anything but careless or ignorant but I can prove that millions of wasted bits would invariably fall into the same small group of pockets. I make a list. I double check everything on it. Then I tell Swift to get me an appointment with Celestia.

She sends word that She will see me when I can get there. Shortly, we are in her private office.

“How bad is it, John?”

“It’s mildly brilliant. It will generate a boom in the region and many millions of bits will be made. And almost all of them will end up in the same few pockets.”

“Are you saying there is something wrong with the proposal?”

“There is nothing illegal about it at all. It’s just bad management practices that waste bits by the bushel. The clever part is that all of the wasted bits wind up in the same pockets over and over again. Herd A will build housing for workers in Baltimare because all of the buildings close enough are under contract to herd B and not available. The buildings are empty but nopony can force the lessee to let somepony else use them. Herd B is building housing in Fillydelphia because the herd A is leasing in Fillydelphia.

“Hundreds of wagons are being purchased to haul material parallel to the existing railroad. As a part of the project is completed all of the wagons are auctioned off in the manner normal for surplus property, except the auction is being held on the construction site in the middle of nowhere. Expect to get about two bits per wagon. Then more wagons will be purchased for the next phase of construction at a bid price of twelve hundred bits each, purchased from one of those same herds, who has no stock of new wagons nor source to obtain them in time for the contract.

“This pattern repeats itself throughout the project. And when the project is over those same herds will be able to exercise dirt cheap options on most of the suddenly prime real estate along the new rail line, probably with the money that ‘fell’ out of the project. I can’t tell you which individuals are behind it nor can I prove that they are anything worse than stupid. I can guarantee you that you can see them from your balcony.

“Here is a list of the things that can be fixed with ‘best management practices’. It should save you several million bits.”

A day goes by then I get a message to appear before the Royal Court in the morning. I go at my now usual zero six hundred. The Throne Room is empty except for a Guardpony who tells me that the Princess is waiting for me on the balcony. I know the route so up I go.

Celestia is waiting. “Hello John Sampson. You told me that I could see the source of my problem from my balcony. I want to share that view with you. That cluster of large houses over there surrounded by the high black wall is it. The herds behind that proposal and a number of similar projects are all headquartered right there. They have a lot of names but their common face is Prince Blueblood. He’ll be in Court today to hear my refusal of their proposal. He is irritating and obnoxious but don’t underestimate him. He doesn’t get his own hooves dirty but he will direct those that do.

“Publicly these herds are the great philanthropists of Equestria. They ‘selflessly’ sponsor great works like bridges and railroads for the good of all. I have long known that after each great project their wealth and influence increase without obvious means. You have shown me the means. They are not going to love you for this. Expect dirty tricks and malicious rumors. They will do anything to discredit you because they will know that as long as you are my adviser, their income will be sharply reduced. Your biggest advantage will be your lack of a history. We know exactly when you began your life in Equestria. That will make it hard to dig up ‘witnesses’ to your previous ‘malfeasance’.

“You will stand next to my throne. I will ask you to speak if it is required. Do not reply to anything, even if directly addressed to you, by anypony other than me. I doubt this will take more than a few minutes. The reaction will come later, after he has received instructions from his superiors.

“Now, John, we have a few minutes. Tell me more about Twilight.”

“Celestia, I tried to simply discourage her but she is one very determined pony. I talked to Steel for a stallion’s point of view and he told me what an idiot I was for even thinking of turning her down. All she has to do is agree to give the foal my name as sire and my heritage and she can have the cover. But regarding her desire to join our band, I finally explained to her in blunt terms what life would be like for a heartbonded Alicorn and refused to allow her to be treated that way. We had a long hard cry afterwards.”

Celestia looked hard at me. “’We’, John?”

“We. I tried to be strong for her while she was there but the entire band cried ourselves to sleep that night in sympathy for her. She is and will always be a friend. She can sleep over, socialize, enjoy wild and crazy cover, go on adventures, whatever. She just has to leave before it becomes dangerous for her. I have misgivings about the risks but AJ and Swift are confident they can manage them. So I will leave mare matters to the mares.”

“I am very pleased, John. I want to thank you for taking care of my Twilight. The time for Court is approaching. Shall we go down and meet our ponies?”

It is interesting to see Court from the other side. We go across before we go down this time. That brings us into some offices on the same floor as the Throne Room. Celestia picks up her regalia and I am inspected. A Guardpony brings a list of everypony waiting for Audience. Celestia checks them off and issues instructions for a few of them.

Celestia turns my way, “You’re in luck, John. No ambassadors have shown up so Blueblood is first. You can leave as soon as he is dismissed. Or you can move to the spectators seats and watch the show. It’s a normal mixed lot today.”

We walk into the Throne Room and Celestia takes Her Throne. I take my place on Her left and the doors open. A white impeccably groomed Unicorn prances in with a mildly drab entourage in tow.

He bows in front of Celestia, “Good Morning Your Majesty. I believe you are ready to approve our grant proposal.”

This boy may have cornered the market on arrogance.

Celestia smiles sweetly at him, “Why of course, my dear Prince, just as soon as we have corrected some minor errors in the transcript that I received.”

“There were errors? I’ll have a clerk’s hide for this!” Blueblood looks annoyed.

Celestia is helpful, “Here’s a list of the errors,” floating an ornate copy of my list to him.

He catches it and holds it in front of his eyes. And flips a page. And flips another page, and another, scowling a little deeper with each page. Then he goes all the way to the back page and looks at the number.

“That’s quite a list, Your Majesty. And I have to have my engineers sign off on some of these changes.”

Celestia is smiling even bigger now, “That’s not a problem, Prince. Take your time. In fact, my staff will be glad to proofread your amended proposal for you.”

He spins and charges for the door scattering his entourage.

Celestia drips sweetness, “Have a nice day, Prince.”

I didn’t roll on the floor but I did make a note to stay on Celestia’s good side.

I stay for a few of the following Audiences. Mostly they are regular merchant ponies getting approval for contracts to supply various goods and services to Royal agencies. After a while I leave and go to the Colonel’s office to catch him up on recent developments.

Steel is in and waiting. After the door is closed, “Hello there John. How did this morning’s Audience go?”

“Did you know that Celestia has a dark side? She positively enjoys tormenting Blueblood.”

Steel laughs, “Blueblood is directly related to Celestia, to about the same degree as a few thousand other ponies. The difference is that he thinks it makes him Her equal and superior to everypony else. She despises him but needs to tolerate him as a handle on the Noble Herds.”

“Well, I just chopped down their money tree. They’ve been getting millions of bits in graft from each of their ‘philanthropies’ up until now. That’s what I’ve been doing for the last week, documenting how they steal. Celestia just handed him a list of ‘errors’ to be corrected. It won’t take them too long to connect all the inquiries into their properties and contracts to me. Life may get interesting after that.”

“You know I’ve got your back, John, but I can’t see them getting too rude with a Guard staffer. They can trash your public image but it won’t change a thing inside the Castle. Celestia will stand against it anyway. Any kind of physical attack would bring the entire Service herd down on them with a vengeance.”

“You’re warned and I’m alert. There’s not much else to do. I do have good news, though. The Twilight issue is fully resolved complete with Celestia’s blessing. She may visit and do anything but stay. The details are being handled by the mares.”

“That’s good, John. Shining will be here in three days anyway. Do you still need to see him?”

“Yes, I do. It’s just not quite as urgent now. And Steel, there’s something I have been wondering about. I know you are busy but you always seem to be waiting for me to show up. How do you do it?”

“It’s horn, John. Why do you think so many administrators are Unicorns? Many of us have a talent for knowing when and where to be. It takes some training and development but you can see how it would be useful.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Thirteen )

It’s been several quiet days since Prince Blueblood’s disappointment. AJ has gone back to the farm to get spring planting underway. Swift and I have settled back into our old routine. I do manage some time with Luna and Fred. Fred doesn’t sleep for much more than an hour at a time but dream time isn’t one to one with world time. He has taught me some things about moving on four feet and operating an equine body. Luna and I shared some sweet grooming and She fell asleep with Her head in my lap. I am concerned about the paradox of the Princess of dreams dreaming in my dream but she wakes with a smile and everything is alright.

An orderly appears in my office around mid morning. My presence is required in the Colonel’s office right away. When I walk in, there is a large gray Unicorn with him. “Major John Sampson, this is Captain Shining Armor.”

We hoofbump and exchange pleasantries.

“Major, we are coming up on the Spring Fling shortly. It’s had many names but it really is a tradition that goes back as far as the Tribes. It’s the last chance for any unattached ponies to find company before the spring season hits. That’s why the young studs call it ‘est fest’. The Princesses have to be there because they are hosting it. And somepony has to escort each Princess so they won’t be ‘unattached mares’. Cadance and Captain Shining are self evident. I will escort Celestia. Luna has the head of her Night Guard. And Twilight has you. Take Captain Swift with you to help manage the mare problems.

“Any hints or suggestions, sir?”

“Be as ‘on duty’ and military as possible. You’re still going to draw high tails in a swarm but if you don’t let go of Twilight they should keep their distance.”

The door quietly closes itself and, “John, this is orders. Given your recent history, it’s tempting fate but Princesses get what Princesses want.”

I looked at Captain Shining, “Captain, I’m going to need your help with this. And call me John.”

“Certainly, John, if you’ll call me Shining. But I want to know what ‘history’ is.”

“Oh, Shining. Once upon a time I cast a major spell on myself and it is still having some ‘different’ side effects. One of the first side effects was that I heartbonded with Swift but I was afraid to cover because I didn’t understand my magic. When we finally had our honeymoon we did some human things and I kinda forgot to close the balcony door while we were doing them. We accidentally started some pretty wild stories.”

Steel is grinning, “Shining, the door opened from ambassadors row on to the main public courtyard and humans have sex for days at a time. They entertained the Castle with two days of full throated passion.”

Shining looks at me with awe, “Now I understand what my sister has been so wild about. John, if you’ll teach me some of these ‘human things’, I’ll help you with anything.”

“Shining, you need to know the other half of the story. When was the last time you talked with your sister about me?”

“It was a letter a couple of weeks ago. I just got here and she wasn’t in when I checked her tower.”

“I’ve broken her heart since then. I’ve offered her everything I can including foals. She wants the band but we heartbond and heartbonding just isn’t for an Alicorn. That’s what I need your help with the most. I have to get her to some kind of stable relationship.”

Shining is looking worried now, “What has Celestia said?”

“Celestia has approved and thanked me for taking care of Twilight. I must assume that Celestia believes Twilight will get over it. My problem is that I have to work with Twilight until then. Things like this assignment. We haven’t spoken since she cried herself dry on my shoulder.”

Shining looks at Steel, “Which Princess assigned John to escort Twilight?”

Steel replies, “Celestia’s words were ‘Twilight needs John’ but no greater detail was given.”

Shining smiles, “It will work out. Either Twilight explicitly requested John and is over her upset or Celestia is taking action to get Twilight over it. What else do you need help with, John”

“I want to do some serious combat training. I am fair at human unarmed combat and expert with human weapons but I’m clueless about pony combat and I’ve never held a sword or shield in my life.”

Shining looks at me critically, “I’ll bet you could match a Unicorn with a sword. You’d have less range but more strength. You should start with basic training and exercise for a while. Combat with me is pretty high level. And I’m curious, what kind of weapons are you an expert with that you can’t use any more?”

Steel and I chorus, “Don’t ask!”

I add, “Shining, as a friend and a brother, don’t even think about human tech. And the reason that I’ve never sparred or wrestled with any ponies is that I’m scared to death of hurting them. I’m a lot stronger than I look. While honeymooning with AJ on her farm I pulled a plow meant for a team of four as light exercise. I want to learn before I get in a situation where it’s critical and I figure you have the best chance of surviving my mistakes.”

Shining laughs, “Now I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Steel jumps in, “And I want to referee. Shining, he juggles deadponies like apples.”

We decide that our first priority is Twilight, training can come later. Besides, I want Twilight to witness our training. So Shining and I are in route to Twilight’s tower. If she isn’t there, we are going to ask Cadance. Shining insists there are advantages to having an Alicorn on call.

Luck is with us, we find Twilight. She isn’t home, yet, but she is headed that way so after a brother sister moment we all head there.

Nothing ventured . . “Twilight, I’ve been chosen to escort you to the Spring Fling. Where and when should I pick you up?”

‘We’ll meet here in the morning. I have a lot of things to do organizing the Fling and won’t come back here. Bring your formal wear and we’ll change right before the party starts.” It was spoken flat as the floor.

“We also need you to be a witness, Twilight. Shining and I are going to fight.”

“Just tell me when.” Still no emotion.

“He was telling me about some of the things you did as a filly and I thought that it wasn’t proper to say things like that about a Princess. I said so and he laughed at me so now it’s a duel to the death.”

“Is that really necessary, John?” still flat but a start.

We arrive at her door and the Guardpony lets us in.

“The Jabberwocky said so with frillish uber spech.”

“Okay, John.”

Damned. I look at Shining, pleading.

“Sister, Celestia wants to see you.”

“I don’t want to see Celestia.” A spark?

“You have to see Celestia.” Shining presses.

“Celestia did this to me. I don’t want to see Celestia.” A key!

“What did Celestia do to you?” Shining sees it too.

“She took my love away.”

I collide with Shining right in front of Twilight. I mouth at him ‘let me’ and he backs up a step. I pick her up and cradle her in my arms. She is just limp, not seeming to notice. I nod at Shining and he picks back up with the questioning. It took more than an hour but something finally cracks.

“John, why are you holding me?”

“Why do you think, Twilight?”

“Would I ask you if I knew?” a little bit of irritation. Good.

“I’m holding you because I love you. Your brother is here because he loves you.”

“But you can’t love me, John. I’m an Alicorn.”

“And that applies to your brother too?”

“No.”

“So love is possible. In fact, it’s right here in the room with you. Look for it.”

“How?”

“I dunno. Maybe there’s a strange alien monster that has enough confidence in your love to charge into your private tower and grab you and squeeze you. I mean, as an Alicorn you could just teleport him hell or lots of other nasty things, couldn’t you?”

Eye contact! “John . . . .”

“Twilight, you offered me every stallion’s wet dream, life with an Alicorn to satisfy my every whim and unlimited worry free cover. I turned it down because it would have harmed somepony that I love. I walked away from heaven because I love you Twilight.”

“I don’t understand, John. You told me you couldn’t love me.”

“No, Twilight, I never said that. I said I shouldn’t love you. I said my love could harm you. I never said it didn’t exist.”

I see hope now.

“Shining, I have heard that Unicorns can do a spell and know for certain that somepony is or isn’t telling the truth. Can you?”

“It’s one of my personal talents, John. But I will need to touch you with my horn and I will have full access to everything in your mind. Are you sure you want this?”

“Shining, I’m far more worried about you than me. I keep some very nasty demons chained in the basement. You need to watch yourself around them. A lot of the other stuff will just be incomprehensible because you don’t have the foundation to interpret it.”

I fold my legs under me until I am sitting on the floor with Twilight in my lap. Being careful of her wings, I move her until I can look directly into her eyes without obstructing Shining. I look up and nod at him. When I feel the touch of his horn I speak.

“Twilight I love you enough to sacrifice my life for you. That is what that conversation with Steel was about. The only things I refuse you are things that I know will hurt you. The rest of the band feels the same way. You can live with us any time you want and have all of the rights of a bandmember, BUT, if AJ or Swift say you must take a break, then you must take time away from us. The only other way I can allow it is if you can figure out a way for us all to remain healthy for as long as you will. Then you can have the heart.”

Shining recoils and shakes his head. “Twilight, he believes absolutely in everything that he says. And he’s right about the demons.” Looking at me, “John, I asked ‘what don’t you want me to see’. I’m sorry. You deserve better.”

Twilight is finally beginning to perk up. I kiss her lightly on top of her nose and say, “Twilight, none of us know what the future will bring, least of all me. I may grow up to be the first Alicorn stallion. Or drop dead of a stroke tonight because of all the stress this crazy world is putting me through. Be happy with what you can get and take small steps toward what you want every day. Can you do that for me?”

“John, will you sleep with me tonight?”

“Certainly, Twilight. I’ve already told you I would. Your place or mine?”

“Here.”

“We need to let Swift know. And Spike.”

“I want you John.”

“We both come as part of a package, Twilight. You can’t separate me from Swift and AJ and I can’t separate you from Spike.”

“Spike is too young.”

Ohhhhh. “Twilight, I don’t lock Swift out when I cover AJ or vice versa. I couldn’t hide it from them and I’m not going to cover you tonight anyway. You aren’t ready for it.”

“But I want it!”

“I’m sure you do. But you have some learning to do first. Trust me, I’m getting pretty good at this.”

“Alright, John. I trust you.”

“Good. Then the first thing we have to talk about is food. Lunch should have been a long time ago. How about you Shining?”

Shining thinks for a second then, “I really need to let Cadance know where I am and see what she has for me to do.”

“Makes sense. Can you line up our PT for in the morning? Big room, medical standby, the whole nine yards?”

“Of course. I might even sell tickets.”

“Make them expensive. I don’t want too big a crowd. Please tell Swift where I am and about the PT.”

“Will do. See you at breakfast, zero five hundred.”

“A pony after my own heart! Luck.”

Twilight’s solution to lunch is, “Spike!”

After I recover from the ear blast, “Twilight, I’m going to get comfortable.”

“Okay, John. Make yourself at home.”

So I go into the bathroom and remove all of my uniform and clothes, carefully folding them, and putting everything on a shelf.

When I walk back into the main room, Spike is there. He blinks once and, “Moving in, John?”

“Short term,” I reply

I stretch out on the big bean bag near where Twilight is standing.

“What’s available for lunch, Spike?”

“We have roasted mixed veggies and a fruit bowl for dinner.”

“Sounds good. Got tea? And I’m sorry for disrupting things.”

“”Where would you like it served, John?”

“Spike, your house, your rules. I’m learning. So do what you two usually do and add one plate.”

“See you at the kitchen table.”

So I get up and follow Spike and Twilight to the kitchen. A thin pad puts me at the right height and the food is ready and good.

I look at Spike, “This looks like a lot of work to just appear. When did you put this together?”

“While you three were having drama in the front room. I got to have something to keep my mind off all the mush or I’ll throw up.”

“Oh, Spike. Someday you will change and the ‘mush’ will suddenly become the most important thing there is.”

“I’m sure. But until then please warn me when you two are going lovey-dovey so I can take a long walk.”

“Spike, let’s work out something better. That walk could last as long as a week when I’m involved. I will not throw you out of your home for hours, much less days. Probably the best thing would be some good soundproofing spells and closed doors except for meals.”

“John, I usually go visiting for about two weeks when Twilight has her yearly. She’s too dangerous to be around.”

“That’s encouraging. Is there any kind of alarm clock around here? I have to be up and getting tea at zero four hundred. Breakfast will be at zero five hundred in the Guard cafeteria. I have an appointment with Shining Armor.”

“It’s set.”

“Okay. Where is it?”

“I’m the alarm clock. I don’t sleep as much as ponies do.”

“Thank you.”

Twilight is sitting there grinning like the cat that just caught the canary.

After dinner Spike refuses help with the dishes so Twilight and I move to her bedroom and close the door. I get comfortable on the pad and motion Twilight over. She blushes and sidles in my direction with her wings slowly rising.

“Twilight, what do you think we are doing here?”

“I think we’re getting closer, John.” and bats her eyes at me.

“Twilight, this is our first date. We are going to talk and get comfortable with each other, not excited.”

The waterworks are warming up and the wings are sinking.

“Twilight, the first rule of good loving is absolute truth. No lies. No bullshit. I don’t want your imagination or mine, I want you.

“I want you too, John.”

“The second rule of good loving is no secrets. I don’t mean that I want the details of every Royal Court nor do I intend reveal Guard secrets to you just to get under your tail. I mean I’m not going to hide my love for Swift and AJ and any other pony I touch. I expect the same from you.

“I can live with that.”

“Good. I had a few dozen lovers on Terra. A healthy young firefighter doesn’t lack for opportunities and I was often notorious as I worked my way up the ranks. You’ve witnessed most of my love life since I arrived in Equestria. How about you?”

“I’ve had some pretty wild heats with the girls. AJ can get really intense.”

“Twi, you got truth about AJ. How many stallions.”

“Counting you? One.”

“By all that’s holy, this is why we’re doing this Twilight. Everypony has been telling me how mature and experienced you are and I’ve been listening despite what my gut has been telling me.”

“I’ve never met a stallion that wanted more than the quickest possible mount. Even in the deepest heat that isn’t enough for me. That’s why I want you so much. I want you bound to me before you get away.”

“You have that, Darling. So relax and enjoy the rest of the ride. You have a whole new world to explore. How do you feel about watching or being watched? You seemed pretty okay with Swift and me in the doctor’s office.”

“That was research. Nothing personal. I couldn’t make a public spectacle out of the Royal mystique but I don’t mind friends like AJ at all.”

“Good. I am considering a ‘show and tell’. I want you to know what is happening to you when you experience your first real cover. It’s not going to be anything at all like you are expecting.”

“How did AJ take it?”

“AJ was something of a special case. She triggered Fred and I really liked what Fred was doing so her first experience was more with Fred than me. Right after that was all me and it was wild enough that Swift got off watching.”

“Wait a minute! AJ was covered by Fred!”

“Yes and no. Remember my ‘inner pony’? Well Luna put me in touch with him and he turned out to be Fred. Fred has had magic since the day we landed in Equestria. He links directly into my mind. He’s been using that link to learn things and understand ponies. When I took my Oath, he decided to help me become equine. He left an image of himself in my mind to use as a model for my equine self. When I was laying there semi-conscious in the afterglow of covering Swift, AJ called me and Fred showed us how a stallion should answer, right down to making my body fully equine.

“Wow. That’s just, Wow.”

“It’s been a great help for me actually experiencing an equine body as it should be. Fred has taught me a lot. It is possible at any time that Fred is in the background giving me advice that I perceive as my own ideas.”

“John, you’re turning out to be a lot more complicated than I expected.”

“Welcome to real life. Lay across my lap and I’ll show you what Swift and I did for most of that wild honeymoon.”

She does and we settle in for some heavy grooming.

I’m not awake but I am aware enough to be struggling with the idea of why I have feathers all over me when there is a knock on the door. That brings me out of it enough to remember Twilight has wings so I answer, “Urghh.”

Spikes voice answers back, “I’ll come back in five minutes if you aren’t out of there before then.”

I fold Twilight’s wing back against her side and slide off the pad. She mumbles and looks up at the disturbance.

“Rise and shine lover. We have a beating to attend.”

I hit the toilet and stumble to the kitchen. A mug of sweet smelling tea is waiting.

“Spike, you’re hired. This is precisely what I need.”

“Thank you, John. Though I still don’t understand why you torture yourself.”

“Spike, I am charged with protecting Princesses, particularly the nearest Princess. I need to be as able as possible at all times and under all circumstances. So I push the limits of my abilities and knowledge. We are going to do a lot of both today when I spar with Shining Armor. He is going to learn a lot about humans for the Guard just in case another human shows up on the other side. Steel and Twilight are going to record the details.”

Twilight walks in about then. “So you want me there to record the details of my brother beating you up?”

“No, I want you there to record the details of me beating the crap out of your brother.”

“How is that better?”

“Less pain for me? Actually, I don’t expect any clear victor. What I want to learn is ways to counter common pony attacks with a human body. Your brother wants to learn the same thing from the pony side. We may have to do this a lot more than once.”

“Twilight, you’re more traveled than most. Have you ever heard of ‘coffee’?”

“No, John. What is it?”

“Tea’s adult brother and the lack of it is Equestria’s one serious defect.”

Shining and Steel are in the food line when we walk in so we fall in behind them. I look around and spot Swift at table near the middle of the room. I get my usual and we all join Swift.

Steel has it organized, “We have a development lab in the armory reserved. A couple of armorers will be there to see what they can fit for you, John. A couple of Unicorn medics will stand by with nurses. Do you have a plan in mind, John?”

“I want to start as basic as we can. Just simple brawling. I’m looking for how ponies move and exert force. The Unicorn factor comes next. How can he hit me with magic and how can I resist it? We might recruit a Pegasus for aerial factors later. I’ve also got some human sword designs in mind. I might never be graceful with one but I can hack with great enthusiasm and a honking big sword on my belt has got to have a major intimidation factor.”

That gets Shining’s attention, “Are you thinking of something heavy in human proportion?”

“Shining, human history includes blades from rapier to broadswords that weigh more than you. My thoughts run to the Scot’s Claymore. They kept a small and isolated country free and independent for centuries with a weapon that personified brute force and a berserker style of battle. The larger more refined nations learned to fear them. It was usually used two handed but they didn’t have magic strength. I also think it’s my best chance for a weapon that I won’t break when I get excited. The downside is that I’m more likely to cut ponies in half than wound them. The part I’m unsure of is cross or basket on the grip.”

Twilight is getting a bit green by now.

But Shining isn’t. “So how long are you thinking?”

“The traditional design is often worn cross body and is near my height in length. But the Scots mostly fought open field battles. I have questions about swinging something like that indoors. I’d hit the ceiling in most rooms.”

Steel is grinning widely, “John, who told you that you could only have one. A sword is a tool. I have different tools for different jobs. But I have to admit that I like the image of you towering over the field of battle with a weapon larger than any of the enemy combatants. You’d be worth a company in sheer terror factor.”

Swift can’t stand it any more, “Can the stallions at this table please tone down the test fest just a little in honor of the Princess? I’ve learned to ignore it but she’s new to the military macho lifestyle.”

I hate it when a plan comes together.

The ‘lab’ is a very large room with every size and shape of stick, club, or wooden blade that you can imagine. We have pads for the floor and pads to wear. There are baskets too but none would hang on a human head. I start by sketching out my idea of a Claymore for the armorers and they promised to fake something out of wood while we work on the unarmed part.

I strip down to my skivvies and Swift puts the uniform in her bag.

Shining and I move to the middle of the floor pads and eyeball each other.

I invite, “Show me what’s natural. I know something of Terran equines. I want to see what translates.”

He smiles at me and charges. I sidestep and grab for his neck as he goes by. Neither of us gets any satisfaction.

“Interesting idea, John. What could you do if it worked?”

“Keep trying and you’ll find out.”

He charges me again but I see the balance shift and I’m ready when he spins around with a double barrel kick. I step back and catch his feet as he reaches full extension. We wheelbarrow for a few seconds then I let him go.

“John, I never dreamed of that one. Those hands change things. But what could you do with it?”

“Shining, this is my natural human strength. If I kick in my magic strength I could beat a hole in the wall with you.”

“Oh.”

We circle and feint for a bit. I fake a hard look to his left and he falls for it. I step in and bulldog him ending with me pinning him flat.

I grin at him, “That’s another thing you need hands for. If you can control the head, the rest of the equine must follow.”

“Does it work on humans?”

“Not nearly as well. Just not enough neck. But if you can get enough grip on the head it is a kill move.”

We level out after a while with neither of us able to score or looking like we might tire out. So I decide to up it a notch.

“Shining, I’m going to change disciplines. What’s coming is the human combat I’m best at and it’s what you’ll be most likely to see out of a random human.”

I raise my fists and begin stalking him. He knows better than let me get too close but doesn’t know what too close is. I lean a little and tickle his nose with a jab. I step in and tickle his jaw with a hook. I feint the other side and when he dodges, I do a little more than tickle him. He shakes his head so I back up and drop out.

“John, it’s my impression that if you had followed through with any of those I would be lying on the mat bleeding?”

“Yes. Though a concussion is also likely. If it’s any consolation, Fred respects that jab.”

“Fred is the real big guy?”

“Yep. Let’s make it fair again. Use your magic on me.”

Somepony slaps me in the back of the head so I start moving and ducking as random as I can. He lands a lot of glancing blows and few dead ons. The problem is that the closer I get to him, the more accurate his blows. I work my way over to a rack of short wooden swords without being too obvious and let him get in a hit that spins me. When I come back around I have several swords in my hands and throw them at him in as rapid a string as I can. He ducks and dodges but can’t launch any blows while he does. I charge yelling as loud as I can and manage to knock him over but he rolls and I miss pinning him. Then the elephant sits on me. I can see pink in the air around me and Shining is in serious concentration. I can wiggle but every gain I make is promptly counteracted.

I relax a moment, “Shining, how long can you maintain this?”

He answers, “For hours. It’s more tedious countering every small move you make that tiring from effort.”

“Brace yourself. Things are going to change.” And I reach for my magic. I anchor to the floor then push my body up. The pink darkens and sparkles. Shining grunts and his horn looks like a roman candle.

“HOLD!” It was Steel. “You colts know better than play with that level of magic inside the Castle and with a Princess present no less!”

We had both released at the first shout from Steel. I sat up and said, “I’m sorry. You are absolutely right and I was the one that escalated it.”

Steel is on top of it , “Time for a break. Let’s shower and analyze this over lunch.”

Shining is impressed, “John, you see my cutie mark? Shields are my talent. What I did was basically throw a shield over the top of you. And you were fighting it with your back. I’m not sure which of us would have won that contest. Yet you say that you can’t throw any kind of magic at all?”

“The only time magic has left my body is the heartbond and I’m not sure it’s my magic.”

“Heartbond is shared Earth pony magic. But you can do some things Earth ponies can’t do?”

“I’ve got speed to match my strength. I’m planning to try that out when we get to swords. It may be my best chance to overcome half a lifetime of ignoring swords. Unless maybe you have a spell for that?”

“No, John, no shortcuts. By the way, can you throw real blades like you threw those wooden ones? Because you could be damned deadly like that.”

“Sure, I’m pretty good with a Bowie or a Kabar. Those are Terran knives that I guess would pass for half scale swords among ponies.”

When we get back to the lab it is time to pick a sword. Here we go again. Unicorn blades don’t have a usable grip. They’re held with magic and magic doesn’t need a special grip so why not lighten them? Pegasus blades strap on. I could do that but then I couldn’t use my wrist. They’re all small and lightweight too. Earth pony blades come closest but they either strap on or are held in the pony’s mouth. Not a usable grip for me. But they had two versions of the Claymore ready for me to try. One is longer than I am tall. The other would hang from my belt to about a hands width from the floor. The grip needs a lot more work but it is possible. And it has a cross on it.

Then the fight starts. If there isn’t a basket for me, Shining won’t wear one. He won’t give a bit and I am not going to fight if he doesn’t wear it.

“Shining, I’m not in danger. You are. You have skills. I have wild and crazy.”

Steel settled it. The basket is orders.

He proves my point right off. I can give him something to do but he can score on me at will and I have to take wild chances to get close to him. Then I concentrate and dial my speed up a notch. Now I have time to see what he is doing and begin to make him work. The ratio is about five to one but I am scoring now. I’m confident that I could turn the speed up more and hurt him but hurting Shining isn’t my goal. My goal is a functional weapon and we are closing in on that. The armorers have agreed to forge me a sword to the size and pattern of the smaller wooden Claymore. And they’ll improve the grip and cross.

We’ve worked up a sweat now but I can’t leave without one last experiment. I want to swing the big one. I pick it up and wave it a bit.

“I so wish this was real steel so I could get an actual feel for it vs my full strength.”

Shining smiles big, “We can do that. It’ll only last an hour or so but you won’t be able to tell the difference for that hour.” And his horn glows bright for several seconds.

Suddenly the sword is heavy. I can hold it with normal strength but I'm not going to swing it too many times. So I dial up my muscles until it feels like balsa wood. I swing it over my head until it whistles and everypony gets way back. The dummies are there waiting for me. I cut the head off the first one like it was made of butter. I swing back and halve it diagonally.

“STOP!” Uh oh. Steel. “We get the point. Leave my equipment alone.”

I just grin, “I like this.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Fourteen )

We have showered, dressed, and dinnered. Shining, Swift, Spike, Twilight, and I are in our apartment in the Guard Sector. Shining and I are both a little sore. We have pummeled each other for most of the day.

“John, I’m impressed with your ability starting from scratch like this. Right now you are more than most swordsponies would want to deal with. You have to learn to watch out for all the tricks but head to head your reach, speed, and strength are enough to make up for a lot of lost training. Get Swift to work on the tricks with you.

We have decided to wait until after the party to try any more sparing. It is only two days away and it wouldn’t do to show up sore or injured.

I want to thank Shining, “Shining, this has been hugely educational for me. I owe you for this.”

Shining grins, “You already know what I want. I’ll collect in a little while. But right now I have duties I must get to. See you at the party if not sooner.”

Twilight zeroes in on Shining’s last statement, “John, what is he talking about ‘collect in a little while’?”

“It’s a stallion thing, Twilight. He’s teaching me about ponies and I’m teaching him about humans. Just like I’m teaching you about stallions. You learned a lot today, didn’t you?”

“I’m not sure I want to learn how much you enjoy hacking ponies to pieces.”

“Don’t you want to know what kind of monster you’ve invited into your bed, what our foals are going to grow up to be?”

Twilight is getting petulant, “I want to go home and go to bed.”

“Go ahead, you’re a big filly.”

“With you, John.”

“I’m sleeping here tonight and so is Swift. You are welcome to join us.”

“What about Spike?”

“Spike is welcome here too. He can join the main pile or use either of the guest rooms. His choice. We are going to talk about mushy things so he will probably be happier outside of the master bedroom. I do wish he would stick around and teach Swift how to make that sweet tea.”

Spike speaks up, “John, I’d rather go back to the tower and take care of some things. Thanks for the offer.”

“You’re always welcome, Spike. Think about staying here when we move there for the week. I’d be happier with somepony I trust taking care of the place.”

“I’ll certainly think about that, John. Until tomorrow.”

Now it’s just the three of us so I strip my uniform off and get comfortable. I walk over to where Twilight is standing and caress her cheek. When I walk to the big bean bag she follows my hand. I sit in the middle of it and she immediately lays in front of me. I begin grooming her as she stretches and moans. Swift settles behind me and starts on my back.

After a few minutes I say, “Swift, Twilight is going to need some help from you. Her knowledge of daily life with stallions is rather limited and rife with misconceptions. She needs an experienced mare’s point of view and we will need to show her what band life is really like.”

Swift picks it up, “Twilight, Just how much do you know? How many stallions have you known?”

“I’ve studied stallion physiology and psychology in detail. I know a lot about what makes stallions tick.”

“That’s not exactly what I asked, Twilight. How many stallions have you been intimate with?”

“One. John.”

I can feel Swift twitch behind me. “So, Twilight, you’re a virgin?”

“I’ve played filly games with my friends every season.”

Swift is beginning to sound concerned. “Did you have any colt friends when you were a filly?”

“I spent all my time studying especially after Celestia moved me into the Castle.”

Swift gets up from behind me and goes to the other side of Twilight and hugs her against me saying, “Twilight, I understand the Alicorn viewpoint of having centuries to work things out but damn it, it’s abuse to a foal. You have a massive gap in your understanding of the world but don’t worry. Mama Swift will fix.”

Swift is in full maternal mode now, “You do have one great fortune. John is an unusual stallion. They exist to take care of us but few take it to John’s level. He has a total compulsion to make his mares safe and happy and he’s very capable. Give him your complete trust and you won’t be disappointed.”

I chime in, “Twilight, we will be your friends forever. That absolute you already have. I want you to learn and grow. We will give you love and foals for as long as needed but I don’t want you to stop looking at other stallions. You need somepony that will be there when I can’t. It’s a fate that Service members accept. We get transferred or fall in battle so every moment that we do get is treasured. When it happens somepony steps up to take over our duty. You will have to learn that way. It doesn’t make the love any less, it makes it sweeter.

“But we have years to work all those things out. Right now we have some decisions to make. We’ve already decided that Swift and AJ won’t be pregnant at the same time so we would appreciate a contraception spell when the time comes. You have to decide when you want a foal. We’ll support you any way possible but that includes advice on timing and good sense. You’ll get plenty of cover regardless. What do you want to do?”

Twilight has started rubbing against my chest. “I want you, John. I want your stallionhood buried inside me.”

I sigh, “You’ve been reading those romance novels, haven’t you? Look down. Tell me what you see.

“I see you, John.”

“What parts of me do you see?”

“I see your belly and your legs.”

“What else?”

“I see your balls.”

“Twilight, my sweet confused love, we’re talking about my flaccid member. Look at it. Touch it if you want to. I’m sure you know all about how blood will flow in and engorge it in preparation for cover. But you aren’t ready to be covered until you know why that blood flows in. Remember the doctor’s office? I stood there uninterested in the wooden dummy. Then Swift got the blood flowing and me emptied in nothing flat. That’s what the books leave out and you need to know.”

Now we have a more confused Twilight. “But, doesn’t it just happen, John?”

“Only in silly books. The traditional stimulus is estrus scent and pheromones. That means cover for at most two weeks a year. I don’t want to wait that long between orgasms so we have other ways. If you want cover outside of estrus you have to start by learning the other ways. It’s not that hard and I’m not trying to torment you but I don’t want to rush things. Getting in a hurry is how ponies get hurt.”

Swift jumps back in, “Twilight, as I understand it, Celestia took you into the Castle and special school the very day you got your cutie mark. That means you had a normal relationship with your sire as a filly but since that day all of your friends are mares and the only stallions you know are Guardponies on duty and relatives. The best stallion role model you’ve known is your brother and he gets to visit about twice a year. I’ll even bet that most of the stallions that you’ve interacted with have been enemies like Sombra.”

Twilight is beginning to look cloudy so I hug her and Swift to me. “Twilight, for the next little while we are your mentors. We will bring you through this into full marehood. I would strongly suggest skipping the foal this year. You are going to change a lot this season and you need to be stable and reliable for a foal. But the final decision is always yours.”

Swift agrees, “John is right. In a very short time you will look back on this and recognize it as the true end of your foalhood.”

I thought for a moment then, “Twilight, this is your life that we are planning here so it’s only fair to give you some say in it. My intent is to use nature as much as possible. I want you to spend time with Swift and AJ. They can familiarize you with how I work and what to expect from me. They’ll also explain what is expected from you and, if they think it necessary, we will demonstrate for you. I want you to be completely ready when your estrus hits and we will act as nature intends from there. You’ll get maximum enjoyment and minimum pain that way. After the season is over you’ll have memories and experiences to draw from for out of season cover.”

Something is worrying Twilight, “How much pain, John?”

Swift is laughing at that, “Twilight my sister, we are going to exercise some muscles that you have never used and we are going to work them hard. Of course you are going to be sore but it’s the most wonderful sore that you can imagine.

There Is a collective gasp when we walk into the cafeteria for breakfast the next morning. I know it can’t be Twilight because it is not her first time with us. I assume that word has got around about me and Shining. Twilight heads to her tower after breakfast and I head for PT. The gym is a repeat of the cafeteria so it’s certainly me. But everything else goes as usual so I head for my office.

Around mid morning a runner comes requesting my presence at the armorers. They want my approval on the rough in of the Claymore they are making for me. I tweak a few details on the grip and love the overall design. They tell me not to worry about a scabbard, it will be delivered separately tomorrow. Then they beg me to let them make the big sword. It will be an honor to be allowed to participate in the birth of such a princely weapon. So we play with sticks and shorten it enough to make it safe for me to run wearing it. I thank them and they bow when I leave.

I decide to have a snack in the kitchen for lunch. Swift isn’t here so I bachelor it. I am about to move to my office when Swift walks in with the mail.

She looks at me and bows deeply, “Oh great prince, I humble myself before you.”

“Swift, what in the nineteen levels of special hell are you on about?”

“Your promotion, John. Haven’t you heard that you’ve been promoted to Prince?

“Swift, I’ve had enough strange pony behavior already today.”

“I’m just reporting what I hear, John.”

“Details, Swift, details.”

“John, when a stallion is summoned to a Princess and spends the night it means that the Princess is horny. Nothing more. When a Princess goes to a stallion and spends the night, it means it’s serious. Combine that with fighting to a draw with the Princess’s brother, the only current Prince of the realm, and everypony is making bets on exactly when the official announcement will be made. The odds on favorite is during the Spring Fling.”

“What does sparring with Shining have to do with it?”

“You have proven yourself worthy of the Princess and the title. It really helped when you had Her witness it.”

“Is there any chance that anypony will ask me?”

“Not really. You’ve already made your intentions regarding Twilight very clear. Most Royal marriages are marriages of convenience. You’re already two up on that. AJ and I don’t mind. We get promoted along with you and we do love Twilight.

“John, just do one thing for me. Never change. It’s this sweet naivety of yours that makes me love you so.”

Surrendering to the inevitable, “Would you please send a letter to AJ advising her of what is going on and moving heat week to Twilight’s place?”

“Another one? Why do you think I went for the mail?”

We are already planning to spend the night with Twilight so we could get up and go with party prep in the morning and Twilight has already told us to bring our party clothes. It doesn’t matter. We’re moving in with Twilight bringing our things. It’s another brick in the wall.

The night with Twilight goes fairly well. She grooms me while Swift works on her wings. It turns out Swift has had extensive experience with a Pegasus. Spike is feeling kind of invaded but as long as it makes Twilight happy, he can handle it.

We eat in the kitchen the next morning because I can’t stomach all of my friends bowing to me when I don’t even know if it is really going to happen. It lets us sleep later which is a good idea if we were going to stay up late with the party.

The day is filled with chasing down details and telling uncertain vendor ponies to just stop farting around and get it done. Finally, we go back to Twilight’s tower to change. There are three packages waiting for me.

The longest and heaviest has a note that says simply ‘Thanks’ and is signed ‘Celestia’. It contains my sword very nicely engraved and with a sun emblem set in the pommel.

The second longest contains a scabbard to match the sword with the marks of all four Princesses embossed down it.

The final package contains a belt just right to fit me and and the scabbard. It has a large gold buckle with a purple inset containing Twilight’s cutie mark. I’m taking this to be the official announcement.

I put it all on with my dress uniform and I look good. I settle on wearing the sword left for a cross draw and practice with it a few times. Then I hear applause. There are two mares standing in the doorway admiring me.

Twilight looks like a Princess and a damned fine one too. She is also positively glowing with happiness. Swift is razor sharp and pure Guard, the iron to Twilight’s velvet. Together we look like Frazetta’s wet dream.

Spike opts to skip a festival devoted specifically to ‘mush’.

We meet with the rest of the Princesses backstage to line up for the Grand Entrance. Steel sees me and comes over smiling from ear to ear. We hoofbump and he says, “Didn’t I tell you. You got the dream, colt.”

I have to ask, “Haven’t you ever dreamed?”

“Of course. Every stallion does. But I couldn’t last thirty minutes on the mat with Shining much less all day and walk off with a light sweat. You’ve proven brains and muscle. Don’t be surprised if Celestia wants you next.”

The trumpets sound and we walk out. Celestia is first, of course, and Twilight is last. Escorts walk shoulder to shoulder with their Princess. And I hadn’t imagined that there are that many ponies in the whole world. The Royal Ballroom is packed and every single one of them is looking at me.

Now Steel’s advice makes perfect sense. Twilight does whatever she needs to do and I’m attached to her shoulder. I can nod and smile with the best of them. We say hello to about a thousand young nobles and I get to hoofbump a crowd of eager colts. But there are snacks and beer. Then I see a familiar face.

“Twilight, what’s he doing here?” pointing to Prince Blueblood.

“John, he’s always looking for more mares. He goes through them that fast.”

“Want to do something fun and evil?”

“Does it target him?”

“Yes.”

“Lead on.”

“We’ll just kinda wander over near him. Then I’ll step away enough to not be obviously with you and smile at a few of the mares around him. That should be enough. If too many come after me you can ‘show up’ and rescue me. Swift will be with you anyway.”

I work my way to a few yards behind him with Twilight a few yards behind me and keeping a low profile. I wave at a mare in front of him and she stares straight at me. I smile and her tail starts waving. That leads to several other mares following her gaze with the same result. They start moving my way, passing around Blueblood. That gets more mares looking and more heading my way. He turns around and for about half a second I see something really ugly on his face. Then he smiles and walks off the other way.

I talk with swarm of fillies for a few minutes about how good health and education would get them a shot at my band then Twilight moves in and ‘rescues’ me, giggling intermittently.

“John, you are forgiven whatever you are thinking about all those fillies. That was fun.”

But Swift is more serious, “John, did you see what I saw when he turned?”

“If you are referring to an intense desire to torture and kill, yes.”

We kept mixing and greeting. After a while we drift close to the snack tables. I have noticed several Earth pony stallions a little older than the average and not looking at any mares. They seem to drift in the same direction that we do. Then I hear a drunken slur behind me.

“I didn’t know they let pets in here.”

I start moving Twilight away from the disturbance.

“Of course ponies that screw their pets aren’t any better”

I turn to Swift, “Get Twilight out of here, fast.”

I turn and look. It is a Unicorn stallion swaying and leering at Twilight. The Earth ponies seem to be lining up behind him.

I turn back to Twilight, “Twilight, if you aren’t out of here in two seconds I am going to throw you across the room.” I reach for her and ‘pop’ she is gone.

Turning to the Unicorn again, “You, sir are drunk. In the morning you will realize just how big a mistake you are trying to make.” His horn is glowing and something is moving under his jacket. I reach down and dial up my speed just in time to see three knives float out in front of him and come shooting toward me.

As the knives slow down I draw and sidestep. When the knives get close I knock them down with my sword. I close on the Unicorn and see more knives emerging so I lop his horn off. The knives fall and he screams but it isn’t over. All four Earth ponies are bringing up weapons. I circle left to put them in a line to me and start down that line. I hit the first one with the pommel of my sword and he just collapses. I hit the second one on the side of the head with the flat of my sword. He goes down but I hear a crunch I don’t like. The third one manages to get his knife fully extended and aimed at me so I cut it off his leg with my sword and get some leg with it. The fourth one is turning to run so I let him go. Behind him, directly in his path, is Prince Blueblood. He is shouting something at Blueblood but I never get hear what. Blueblood has already drawn his sword and when the Earth pony gets to him he runs the pony through.

I grab a cover off of one of the tables and apply it to the leg wound on the third Earth pony and tell him he can hold it there and wait for help or he can die. Luckily help is pulling up as I speak. Shining is in the lead.

I shout at Shining, “I have unfinished business. Take care of these and make sure they can answer questions.” But Blueblood is nowhere to be seen. I run in the general direction but the odds are he teleported out. I drop my magic and head back.

About time I get back to Shining, Celestia pops in with Twilight in tow. She is pissed. I walk up to her and say, “Princess, we need a very private talk before anything else.”

By the time I finish the sentence we are standing in Celestia’s private office. “Speak, John.”

So I told her the whole incident as it happened, then, “It is obviously aimed at me. The Unicorn was drunk and insulting until Twilight is gone. When she teleports the weapons come out immediately. I tried to leave them in shape for questioning.”

Celestia is focused, “I agree, John. But that doesn’t make a difference. They attacked a member of the Royal Herd in the Royal Castle. Somepony will pay dearly.”

“Your Majesty, that somepony is Blueblood. He was behind them when they attacked and the last one ran to him shouting. Blueblood ran him through and vanished.”

“John, are you very sure of this?”

“Yes but it will be nothing but my gut feeling unless one of the prisoners talk. We need to protect them carefully. Can we go back now?”

And we are back. Shining reports that the Unicorn is in shock and headed for the hospital. Number one has a concussion and might talk later and might not. Number two has a crushed skull and is gone. Number three is headed for surgery and will be questioned later. Number four has been run through the heart and was dead before he hit the floor.

Shining had one question, “If the first four are classic adrenalin mistakes, how and why did you kill the last one so neatly?”

“I didn’t kill the last one. Further discussion will be in a secure location.”

The party is, of course, over. I am proud of ponies in general because their exit is quick and orderly.

We move to a conference room in the depths of the Palace. All of the Princesses, Steel, Shining, Swift, and myself are looking serious at each other.

Celestia directs, “John, tell them exactly what happened and leave out no detail.”

I do.

Celestia asks Swift next, “What did you see?”

“I saw exactly what John described right up until the Unicorn straightened up and the knives came flying. He was moving too fast for me to get a good look after that. Blueblood was standing well behind the Earth ponies but I didn’t see him after the action started.”

Celestia looks to Twilight.

“I noticed that John was getting nervous and kept looking behind us. Then he said we should move away. Before I had a chance he shouted that I could leave or get thrown. I teleported out immediately.”

Celestia focused back on me, “Would you have handled a Princess like that?”

“In a heartbeat, Your Majesty. At that point, all I knew was that there was a serious threat. My plan was to get Twilight to safety while I blocked them from pursuing. My actual words were ‘if you aren’t out of here in two seconds I am going to throw you across the room’. I know She has wings and magic so I wasn’t worried about harming her. Mostly I wanted a fast way to impress on Her the seriousness of the threat.”

Celestia smiles, “That’s how a pony gets to be a Prince. Steel, what could you tell from examining the scene?”

Steel summarizes, “Every bit a physical evidence agrees perfectly with what Prince John describes. We have the knives in the places he named and more identical knives on the Unicorn. We have the weapons on all of the Earth ponies in use as described. The few party goers able to give a coherent account match Prince John’s descriptions. Several of them did see Blueblood where Prince John described him but nopony saw what Blueblood did or where he went. The wound on the last Earth pony could not have been made by a sword as large as Prince John’s.”

Then Celestia turns to Shining, “Shining, how are the prisoners doing?”

“The Unicorn may never be sane again. Cutting off a horn in use causes a terrible backlash. The Earth pony with the concussion will survive but won’t be able to answer questions for an unknown amount of time. If what the Earth pony with the leg wound says is true, it doesn’t matter. The last Earth pony hired all the other ponies for the job. All were given an advance in gold coin, which all had on them, with the rest to be paid on completion. They did know that the job had to be completed before the end of the festival but only the last Earth pony knew who ordered it and was going to pay for it.”

Celestia looks at me again, “Conclusions, John?”

“They are obviously after me. All I had was some ponies that stood out from the crowd and a sloppy drunk until Twilight was gone. Then five assassins came out with weapons. My theory is that they were taken by surprise with me being promoted and wanted to kill me before it became official thereby avoiding the whole ‘attack on the Royal Herd’ thing. I can say with deep personal conviction that Blueblood et al. are behind it. We had a minor confrontation earlier in the festival that Twilight and Swift can attest to where he exposed his emotions. He has to know by now that I’m the primary reason they’ve lost millions of bits. And the final Earth pony, the one described as the link to their employer, ran straight to him when panicked.

“But I can absolutely guarantee you that if he is charged, he will portray himself as an innocent bystander forced to defend himself from a mad pony that had just attacked a Princess and everypony should thank him for ending the danger to other ponies. And there’s not a damned thing we can do to contradict him.”

Celestia looks to Steel again.

Steel says, “I can’t find a flaw with that, unfortunately.”

Shining’s turn, “There is one correction I’d make. It’s a popular misconception that my marriage to Cadance made me a Prince. The marriage is the icing on the love cake. I’m a Prince because my Princess says so. There is no ‘official’ confirmation or announcement needed. When She wants it, it happens. Everything else is spot on.”

I answer, “Shining I had suspected as much and was waiting for a good time to ask. But, there is betting pool in the castle on the time and date of the ‘official announcement’. I’m treating this buckle as a pretty damned solid indication for any pony with doubts.”

Celestia focuses on me, “Since you believe that, John, and you’re wearing it, can I take it to be your acceptance of the nomination?”

“Damn you, Celstia, there will be an accounting some day for your methods. But until then this is the best way to keep my band safe so I will embrace the whole package.”

“All of it, John?”

“Absolutely everything but the previously stated exceptions.”

“It’s done , John.” And another of those ripples in the world happened.

Celestia is smug. Luna is grinning like the Cheshire Cat. And everypony else is confused.

Twilight broke the moment first, “John, what just happened?”

“I just auctioned off my soul for the future happiness of everypony I love. And that is all anypony else needs to know.

“And now that I am fully and officially a Prince of the Realm, maybe there is another possibility. I could challenge Blueblood. Get him in public and accuse him on a personal level. Make it a matter of honor.”

“He just got to see you in action, John. Do you think he’ll stand or run? Besides, removing the individual Blueblood will have little effect on the herd. Somepony else will just take his place and we will have to start all over again.” Celestia is being a wet blanket.

We kick around a few ideas but the only one with any traction is for me to appear in the next Royal Court and be loudly and publicly acclaimed. That should slow things down for a while.

Steel and Shining want to talk to me privately so we adjourned to my office. Twilight and Swift are in the apartment deciding what to take to Twilight’s tower and what to leave here and making a list of things that should be duplicated for Twilight’s Castle.

Shining hoofbumps me, “Welcome to the family from both directions. And thanks for going easy on me when we sparred.”

“Shining, I don’t know what the ultimate reach of my magic is. Every time I need more, it’s there. But you see what happens when I try to crank it up and still control myself. I’m going to have to spend hours practicing not splattering melons and hope that translates to not splattering ponies. You let me reach a little farther and that did make a difference when it mattered. Besides, there are vulnerabilities to any magic as you pointed out.”

Steel is practical, “Do you want to keep your apartment? A Prince is entitled to much more.”

“Steel, I want to keep it. It’s my link to my friends and my sanity just like the farm. That’s the tension between me and Celestia. Coming in as an outsider, without the built in worship factor that ponies have, I see how messed up some things are getting. Celestia is trying to make more Alicorns so Equestria will be safer and happier and she’s not having complete success. What I just agreed to was full participation in Celestia’s program to improve the Royal Herd. For my own sanity I need an anchor outside the Royal chambers. The human culture I grew up in ditched everything royal centuries ago in favor of merit based status. As kept breeding stock I will go insane.

“I want to eat here regularly and keep up my informal mornings. I want to keep all the things Major John has come to represent. And I want Swift and AJ to have an escape from the Duchess broodmare role. I expect Spike to use it as an escape from heat week too.

“John, that’s a big bite to chew on. Of course a Prince gets what he wants anyway but I appreciate the way you have always tried to keep me informed. I assume the status of your locked room remains unchanged?” Steel is remembering things I forgot.

“Yes. If it changes it will be to destroy everything in it.”

Shining is getting interested now, “Steel, I can testify to some of what he says. Why do you think moving to the other side of Equestria seemed a good idea to Cadance and me? John’s statement about Celestia’s methods struck a chord in me. But I want to know, what locked room?”

Steel looks at me, so, “Do you remember that simple statement that humans ended everything Royal centuries ago? That’s what’s in that room, the end of everything Royal.”

Shining is incredulous, “You can’t be serious.”

This time Steel took it, “I’ve seen it, Shining, and his explanation of it makes perfect sense. That’s why we don’t talk about it.”

We talk for a while, mostly speculation, and Shining has some very good suggestions for training methods. A knock sounds on the door and when I answer Swift walks in with a tray of steaming tea cups.

“John, I believe that you’ll want breakfast and a change before the Morning Court. It is currently zero four thirty. If you want to take PT, I can pack your best dress and sword in my saddle bags.”

“Please do, Swift. I’ll change to my cammies before we leave.”

After Swift is gone Steel announces, “John, if you ever mess up, I’m stealing her. She’s a prize.”

“Steel, if I’m ever that messed up I want you to have her. You are one of the rare few that could keep her.”

As we walk in to the cafeteria there are a lot of sighs but no real motion. My pony friends have good instincts. I have my usual and we all talk about plans.

Twilight has a biggie, “I’ll probably be retreating to my tower in a few days. All this stress is having an effect.”

Swift immediately pops up, “I’ll notify AJ.”

I add, “Steel, let me know if the world ends.”

PT is routine. I’m going to have to get some more versatile equipment. Maybe it’s time for Steel to order that Minotaur weight set. We shower and I assemble my Dress gear while Swift gets into hers. When we walk out of the showers they are waiting. The gym is filled with ponies all bowing to us. I have to get out of there before I started crying.

Hurry up and wait, the ultimate universal constant, and it has us. Twilight has been sent to bring AJ in and Celestia is notifying friendly nobles. The new target time is after lunch. We are to wait in Celestia’s private office lest we spoil a surprise for certain ponies.

At just under an hour Twilight and AJ pop in.

AJ doesn’t even take a breath, “John Sampson, what have you done? I get rousted out in the middle of spring planting and told to report to Royal Court just get dressed and let’s go.”

“Deep breaths, AJ, deep breaths. You are here for our promotion. I’m being acclaimed a Prince of the Realm and you have to be here to be acclaimed Duchess. How do you like the new duds?”

Twilight went to join the Morning Court while Swift and I explained to AJ how we got into this situation. It took until nearly noon.

A Guardpony came to request our presence for lunch with the Princesses. I manage to finagle things around to get myself seated next to Cadance.

I open with, “Hi there. We keep bumping into each other but never getting to talk. After Shining described you as ‘the sane one’ I just had to make a chance.”

She laughed, “Really? That’s interesting after some of the things he’s said about you.”

Yep, we can get along, “I hope you’ll get a chance to make up your own mind. I want to spend some time training with Shining. I need the training.”

“Shining says you’re as strong as he is right now.”

“I may be stronger. But I’m too new to the magic to really know anything. I need technique and control for that strength to be useful and he’s got that all over me.”

“You will be welcome in the Crystal Empire any time you can be there. In fact, the impression I get from Shining is that the Crystal Empire will be safer for your presence.”

It’s time. I am to wait at the main door with AJ and Swift beside me. When I am announced we will approach Celestia. She will make the announcement and I will take my place between Celestia and Twilight. Swift and AJ will flank me the whole time.

Celestia gets out the full Royal Voice for this one, “Be it known that Princess Twilight Sparkle has chosen Major John Sampson as Her Prince. In recognition of his exceptional qualities and service to the Royal Herd his nomination to Prince of the Realm is hereby confirmed. We, the four Princesses of Equestria, do Declare this to be Our Unanimous Will. We further Declare that Captain Swift Trail and Applejack of Sweet Apple Acres, bandmates of Prince John Sampson be given the rank of Duchess. Prince John Sampson, take your place alongside your Princesses.

And I stand between Celestia and Twilight with Swift and AJ one step behind me. Luckily, Court is over almost immediately so everypony can celebrate and spread the word.

I chase down Shining, “Shining, my new Brother-in-law, where are you and Cadance staying?

Shining barks a short laugh, “In your old digs on Ambassador Row. Yes we keep the door closed.”

“Don’t. You’ll be amazed the effect that door can have on your life. But, temptation aside, I want to ask you if you can stand the sight of your sister having multiple screaming orgasms?”

“That sounds very interesting, John. What are you proposing?”

“I’m going to be instructing Twilight in the same human ways you want to learn very shortly. You’re a big enough stallion to keep it out of your sister. You could watch and learn. I could watch and advise when you practice on Cadance. All you have to do is come and stay with us in Twilight’s tower.”

“It makes sense to me, John. But you should know that Cadance has had a fixation on you since you confessed that you overspelled yourself. I wouldn’t mind the help with her but you’re going to need some help yourself. She’ll get the final say anyway.”

“I have an ulterior motive, Shining. I plan to be sterile this year and I don’t know if Twilight can be absolutely trusted on that subject.”

“That we can do. I’ll talk to Cadance and we’ll come by for a talk and spell. We might stay.”

“Fair enough. Did I mention that Swift worshiped you before she met me? She might fancy some variety when the full season is on her and I’m chasing Alicorns.”

Shining went on to the rest of his day and I went to my next chore, Celestia. Yep, She’s in and waiting.

“Hello My new Prince. We’ve been expecting you.”

“Said the spider to the fly? You do know that some flies eat spiders? Let’s make this John and Celestia.”

“Oh John, can’t we just dance a little?”

“We have years and years of dancing ahead. Let’s not wear it out too soon. Besides, I need clarity right now.”

“Very well. As long as you’re ready to do your stallion’s duty.”

“That’s what we’re here to discuss. They’ll be no foals this year. I just escaped an assassination purely by my own wits. If you can’t protect me, the baddest warrior in Equestria, you damned sure can’t protect my foals. And when we do get into production I will NOT become another Blueblood.”

“John, we have a bargain. Do you think you can say ‘no’ to a Princess?”

“I know I can. I can always die and there is no way to stop me. If you’ll remember, our deal included a clause that I would refuse anything that would harm my Herd, my Princesses, or Equestria. You have made all of you my Princesses and my herd. I won’t help you destroy yourself. I will work with you for the betterment of Equestria and my Herd.”

“Convince me, John.”

“Scatter shot breeding like Blueblood is doing dilutes a bloodline out of existence. We need to concentrate on quality, not quantity. And we need to raise the foals to be best possible ponies. We need a plan. There isn’t enough time left this year to do it. Let me have my first experience with pony estrus without the added stress of foals and we’ll be ready for next year in all ways.”

“That makes sense, John. I may want to check on you and Twilight while the season is in progress. Would that disturb you?”

“I’ve already invited Shining and Cadance to join us. I wouldn’t mind you joining at all but I fear what it might do to Twilight. You have an unhealthy hold in her mind and I want to get her up to real adulthood before she confronts that issue.”

“Very well. I am certain of your commitment to her and your capabilities so I will defer to your judgment. I may want a visit from you at some point.”

“No problem. You might want to coordinate with Luna when you do.”

“What, did she beat me to it?”

“I didn’t say that. I just said it might be easier to spend a night with you and the following day with her.”

My external worries done for the day, I headed for Twilight’s tower. I guess at some point I’ll have to get used to ‘Our tower’.

The doorpony is expecting me and opens the door with a bow. Inside I look around for Spike. As I expected, he is in the kitchen.

“Spike, your use of our apartment in the Guard sector is arranged and approved. Do you have a Guard ID?”

“Thank you, John. And no.”

“Stop by the Clerk’s office and get one. Outside of the Castle it will entitle you individually to all of the rights and privileges of a Guard Staffer. It probably won’t mean much in Canterlot because everypony knows you here. But elsewhere it can make a big difference. All Services and Agencies will recognize it.

“Do you think it will help that much?”

“It will name you as my relative. There are places where my name carries more weight than Twilight’s. Between the two of us, you should be well taken care of.”

“How is it possible your name carries more weight than Twilight’s?”

“Have you heard about the assassination attempt?”

“A little, but what does that have to do with it?”

“I crippled or killed four professional assassins in three seconds. Ponies that don’t care about anything else care about their own life.”

“That’s cool, John.”

“And I need a favor from you. I need protein. Lots of protein. It’s a stallion basic and for the next several weeks I need a high protein intake. Can you stock up in here for me?”

“What kind of protein do you need?”

“Chicken, fish, eggs, beans, cheese, oatmeal, and lentils in any combination or variety. Juicy fruits and fruit juices will be good for everypony when blood sugars crash.”

“Fruits, cheese, oatmeal, and lentils are already in. The rest will be in by mid morning. Twilight is going to twitch at the meat.”

“She’ll get over it when she finds out what my body does with all that protein. Thanks.”

My mares are upstairs studying a large book with pictures.

“Hello my wonderful mares. Are we learning things?”

“AJ quips, “We are planning your demise from exhaustion.”

“Go for it. I bet I outlast you. By the way, Shining and Cadance are going to visit. I have invited them to spend the week here instead of in our old digs on Ambassador Row. It’s not a done deal but I think it would be a good idea.”

Twilight is turning that peculiar red purple color, “John, do you think my brother should see me like this?”

AJ surprises me, “Twilight, we all like to go out in the open pasture have completely natural cover. I’ve found puddles in the woods nearby. The only other stallion for miles is my brother. I wish he wouldn’t hide when he does it.”

I add, “Cadance is going to be here too. Shining wants to learn how I make mares so happy and we may put on a demonstration for them. I may also coach him with Cadance.”

AJ promptly volunteers, “I’ll show them if you don’t want to. Twilight, we’re proud of the things we can do. Swift, what was life like the day after your honeymoon?”

Swift grins, “I was the most popular mare in the Castle. Everypony wanted to know my secret. Just like your brother wants to know John’s secrets. They’re all jealous of us.”

I hated to do it, but better now than later, “Twilight, since this is going to be strange for you, I want somepony trusted that can take care of you no matter what. That’s why I want Cadance. I may have to leave for a while to fulfill my obligation to Celestia. She wanted to line mares up in the hall and have me cover them non-stop but I vetoed that for medical reasons. But if She calls, I must go for at least part of the season. That is the price for all of the good things happening to us.”

AJ is miffed, “We can take care of her!”

“I know you can, AJ, right up until she teleports. That’s why I need another Alicorn.”

Spike shouts from below, “Dinner time!”

That set off a small rush for the stairs.

After dinner we are all sitting in the front room enjoying the feeling. I am grooming AJ and Swift is grooming Twilight.

I make an executive decision, “Spike, take Swift shopping with you. I want her to learn where you get things like that delicious cheese so she can stock it in other places. She can help you too since you are going to have more ponies to buy for.”

“I can just buy more, John. It’s no problem.”

“Spike, you are going to have to learn to share the load. This is just the beginning. Imagine what it’s going to be like with foals. Spike, you’re not being replaced, you’re being expanded.”

That doesn’t get any farther because Cadance and Shining have arrived.

Cadance is bubbly, “My, what an image of domestic bliss we have here.”

I smile back, “Come on in and join it.”

Shining is smiling too, “I like this side of you, Little Sister.”

Twilight blushes but spoke up, “I’ve been learning a lot that schools don’t teach lately.”

Cadance pulls a bag to across from me. “Shining tells me that you need a spell.”

“I need to be sterile for the duration of this season. I wasn’t sure I could reach a full understanding with Celestia and I didn’t want to ask Twilight to confront Her directly. It worked out though. So while the spell would be appreciated, it’s no longer mandatory.”

Cadance is impressed, “John, I have a pretty good idea what Celestia has planned for you. Are you telling me you talked her out of it?”

“As a matter of fact, I did. I have the advantage of human knowledge of genetics so I know why her plan was doomed to fail. We have a new, better plan now. Part of it is to allow me this year to learn my way around pony estrus.”

Cadance smiles big, “Okay, John, you’ve talked me into it. There’s no way I could walk away from any stallion strong enough to handle Celestia.”

“On that note, I am expecting to be called to attend Celestia for some part of the season. That’s the part I need your help with the most. Twilight will be in the depths of her first season with a stallion and I don’t want her teleporting into trouble.”

“Damned, John. You organize everything, don’t you?”

“Do you see the cutie mark?”

“I’ve been wanting to ask you what that means.”

“That is exactly what it means. I organize everything. It’s a human talent.”

Cadance moves closer and examines me, “I don’t see any reason a standard pony based spell won’t work on you. You seem to be made mostly the same.”

“I am. In fact I’m close enough to be naturally fertile with mares. That’s the one thing to watch out for. The doctor has told me that I’m super fertile.”

“That won’t matter for this spell. Do you want it timed or reverse on demand.”

“Make it reverse on demand.”

Her horn glows dimly for few seconds, “It’s done. Next?”

AJ steps up, “Can I borrow Shining for a night?”

Cadance grins, “Of course, if I can take John out for a romp.”

AJ asks, “Where do you want me?”

I get up and offer AJ my spot.

The horn glows and, “Next.”

Swift hops right in.

“Next.” And she looks right at Shining.

He lays down and grins, “Better safe than sorry.”

The horn glows then, “Twilight and I can regulate our own fertility so we are done.”

I look at Twilight, “How are you feeling, Twilight Darling?”

“I’m nervous and relieved at the same time. I’ve been dreaming of it for years and the reality is nothing like any of the dreams. It’s better.”

Cadance reminds Twilight, “Remember learning Friendship and building a circle of Friends? This is the next step. You are learning Love and building a circle of Lovers. I think you’ve got yourself a pretty damned good circle here.”

“Cadance, we’re too stressed and fatigued for anything but sleep tonight so Spike is safe. What I’m trying to gauge is when and for how long he should move to our Guard apartment.”

“I think he should spend about three weeks there starting tomorrow night.”

“You hear that, Spike? You’re safe on the pile tonight but have everything you need for a month ready by late afternoon. We’ll help you carry it. We’ll all come by from time to time but the mares will have to time it around their season. We can bring things then.”

Cadance is marveling at me, “You really can’t help it, can you?”

Swift laughs, “Honey, you don’t have a clue, yet. You’re part of his herd now. He is absolutely compelled to take care of you.”

I drop back on the big bean bag and beckon to Cadance, “Come on over here and find out.”

She sits down beside me and I start grooming her.

Shining jumps up, “Hey. What about me?”

I look up and, “So pick one.”

Swift steps right in front of him, “Come with me, big colt,” and pulls him to another big bean bag.

AJ and Twilight take the last big bean bag.

I laugh, “Think of it as the beginning of your education, Shining.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Fifteen )

“Zero four hundred. Rise and shine.” It’s my green and purple self motivated alarm clock. Sleeping between two Alicorns is sweet. They seem to have a need to cover everypony with their wings and two of them can completely cover me. This is really easy to get used to. I wonder if Pegusi are the same.

I gently fold wings off of me so I can get out of the pile but with this many ponies it’s complicated. Toilet followed by kitchen. Spike has my caffeine infusion ready.

“Spike if you don’t tell Swift the secret to this tea before you leave, consider not coming back. I’m going to be awfully cranky by then.”

“I’ll see to it that you’re taken care of, John. There hasn't been a lot of stallions for me to get to know around here. Shining has been about it. You’re different from the ponies I’m used to and I like the difference.”

“Thank you, Spike.”

More of the herd is trickling in now and collecting cups of tea.

Cadance moans, “Why do sane ponies get out of bed at four AM? Are ponies that get out of bed at four AM sane?”

I chuckle, “I’m sorry I forgot to warn you. We have informal mornings with the Guard. That’s breakfast in the cafeteria followed by PT in the gym. You’re welcome to join us or go back to bed. I doubt we’ll be able to keep it up after today anyway.”

Shining wanders in about then, “Good morning, John. Going to juggle deadponies this morning?”

Cadance is staring at me now, “Is he talking about those big heavy balls we use to test a Unicorn’s strength?”

“Yes. And I don’t exactly juggle them in the air because it’s too dangerous in a crowded environment like the gym. I do use them for jogging weights and things like that.”

Now She’s looking at Shining, “And you want wrestle with him again?”

I explain, “Steel stopped the match before we found out who is the stronger. We need to go to an isolated place and finish it.”

Very sweetly, “Why did Steel stop the match?”

“I think he was afraid that we might wreck the Castle.”

“Stallions!”

We line up as a herd and head for the cafeteria. We get a small gasp when we made our entrance. My ponies are getting used to seeing Princesses.

I order a four egg cheese omelet and oatmeal for breakfast then recommend that Shining do the same.

Cadance asks, “John, are you training your Guard friends to ignore status?”

“Far from it. When I’m wearing something like these cammies, I am signaling to them that I want their friendship as ponies regardless of rank. When I am done with PT I will shower and put on my uniform with my rank and status. They will recognize it and actually go out of their way to show respect. They packed the gym so they could all bow to me the day I was acclaimed.

“Cadance, these are the ponies that will throw their dying body in front of an enemy to give us an extra second to escape. I respect them for their willingness to sacrifice in large and small ways. That’s why I do this and that’s why they honor me. Shining knows. He has the same honor. It’s the difference between a leader and an officer.

“Why the diet, John?” Shining asks.

“Protein, Shining, protein. What do you think those mares are going to spend the next several weeks draining out of us?”

After eating, Cadance, Twilight, and AJ go back to the tower to get the day organized. All the military types go to PT. It is routine other than I throw a pony ball up and catch it to satisfy Shining’s curiosity. Then we head out to do chores.

I inform Steel that tonight is going to be the night. We get supplies in. We get an alarm clock. Spike gets packed and moved.

We have a nice dinner then adjourned to the upstairs library. All the tables go to one side and the bean bags are lined up in two rows.

Swift, AJ, and I occupy one line and Shining, Cadance, and Twilight take the other line.

I start it off, “Shining, the very first thing to learn is that you don’t have to mount. Just blow off the whole ‘gotta get it done’ attitude. Try something else first.”

“But, John, how is she going to get anything out of it if you don’t mount?”

“Watch.”

I lay back on the bean bag and pull AJ to me. She meets me with a full on kiss. We tongue wrestle for a little while then I nibble on her lips. She tries to get to my ears but I am wise to that. I slip down her neck kissing as I go. She is beginning to breath hard by then so I wrap my arms around her barrel and rub as I nuzzle and snuffle in her chest hair. I work my way lower and move my body to between her hind legs. I begin licking her belly and she starts moaning. The closer I got to her bellybutton, the louder she gets. Then I capture her bellybutton with my lips and suck on it. She begins to rub herself on my chest. I suck hard then bite lightly. She wraps her hind legs around me and starts grinding wildly. I twiddle her bellybutton with my tongue and she thrusts wildly against me and screams. I keep after her until she collapses. I roll to the side and caress her cheek as she blows down.

“Shining, look at my crotch. I haven’t even got to erection yet and she’s had a mid level orgasm. That’s how.”

Twilight and Cadance both have wing boners.

“Look around you Shining. Mounting turns you on. This is what turns mares on.

“The second thing you have to learn is that the only way a body is dirty is if you play in the mud. And that washes off. You can’t imagine how many stallions are repulsed by mare organs. I thought the whole goal was to get in there? Only with the equally dirty part of the stallion, I guess.

“You know what? It tastes good. AJ tastes like apples. Swift tastes like hay and honey. I can’t wait to find out what Twilight tastes like.”

“Now wait a minute! That’s just too much to believe.” Shining erupts.

“What’s too much to believe? That mares taste good?”

“That AJ would taste like apples.”

“Shining me lad, it makes perfect sense and has science behind it. The taste of body fluids is part personal chemistry and part diet. AJ literally tastes like what she eats because the things that give food taste are absorbed by her body and carried along to be secreted when anything else is secreted. Wanna guess what the apple farmer eats a whole lot of?

Swift adds, “I can verify it. He’s telling the truth.”

AJ can’t resist, “You can come try it for yourself.”

“You’re getting ahead of things, AJ. I haven’t shown him how yet.”

“Well I wish somepony would get on with it.” AJ is ready.

“Okay.”

I slide around and stick my head between her hind legs. I start licking and nibbling her nipples in turn. She starts breathing harder. I keep playing with her teats for a while then I catch a nipple between my teeth and pull on it. She curls her back to lift her butt and I slip both arms under her to support her in that position.

I move back and rub my nose on her wildly winking clitoris. That got a small moan so I lick her clitoris and get a bigger moan. I slide my tongue up and down between her lips and she begins to spasm. Then she erupts with nectar and I struggle to catch every drop. I suck on her clitoris and her lips pull open so I drop my chin in and keep tongue flicking her clitoris. She begins to thrust up against me getting wilder and wilder. I push back and keep chasing her clitoris. She erupts with nectar again and starts spasming against my face while getting louder and louder.

Then the peak is passed and she begins to relax but I don’t let her go. She bucks and twists but in just a few seconds is on her way back up thrusting against me. I ride her up and back down three times getting at least a mouthful of nectar every trip.

Then I hear Shining behind me, “Please, John, have mercy!”

AJ screams, “NO! Don’t stop!”

So I ride her up and down twice more until she is limp and twitching. I back up and stand to see Shining standing there with a fully flared, dripping erection.

“I wasn’t asking for her, John, I was asking for me.”

Cadance and Twilight have left the room. Swift is just smiling from ear to ear.

Shining, AJ, and I hit the shower while Swift changes the pad.

Shining is incredulous, “John, I’ve heard some stories but they aren’t half of the truth. There’s no way I could come close to what you do.”

“Shining, you can be as good as you want to be. It’s a learned art just like sword fighting. If you can teach me to be a passable swordspony, I can teach you to thrill mares. It’s really that simple.”

Cadance and Twilight have made some calming tea so when we settle into our pile everypony is relaxed and ready to sleep.

I am in that blissful time of the morning when I’m not awake but I am aware. I can feel the pile around me, my herd, my life, my security and it is perfect. There is movement but no cause for alarm. Warm fur against my chest comforts me. But something is different. I can’t define it exactly but it is something good.

It is spreading. There is warmth and softness on my growing erection. This is not a dream. There is movement across my face and head. That brings my eyes open and I am looking up at a tail. It’s a dark blue tail and it is attached to a purple rump with swollen violet lips leading down to a rapidly winking bright red clitoris. But that’s not what has my attention.

There’s a smell under here with me. An exciting new smell. As I drink it in my erection snaps to full boner. That’s when I realize that Twilight has won the race and I’m about to be the prize. I stretch my tongue out to taste her but I just can’t reach. So I blow on her exposed clitoris and I’m rewarded with a squeal on my erection.

She slides closer and I take my first taste. I don’t know what to call it but it’s a special kind of wonderful. I probe deeper looking for more. Oh yeah. She’s got plenty. And it tastes . . . bright? I don’t have a word for it but something primal in me recognizes it.

Time to do something about it. I reach up and grab her under her ribs and plant her on my face. My tongue is running around the interior of her nether lips and she is drenching me in that lovely fragrance. I catch her clitoris and suck on it. She starts grinding herself on my face. I’m trying to fit everything from nose to chin in her but it just isn’t big enough. I lift her to get a breath and I realize there are purple fireworks in the room. So I go back in for the clit. She bounces hard on me. Then she bellows loud enough to rattle the walls and the room lights up with bright violet. I need to breathe but she’s pushing and spasming with enormous strength. Suddenly she’s limp and round one is over.

I lift her and sit her on my legs as I sit upright.

“Good morning, Twilight.”

Deep breathing, “Good morning, John. Did I hurt you?”

“How could you possibly hurt me, Twilight?”

“I couldn’t control my Alicorn strength.”

“Twilight, remember who you are talking to. I like it when you lose control. The light show is awesome.”

AJ and Swift are standing off to the side just grinning.

“Don’t worry, your time will come.” I direct at them.

About then a blue light show erupts on the other side of the room. Shining and Cadance are hitting their stride. As we watch, he goes limp and slides off of her.

Looking up, Shining spots us watching them, “I’m sorry, John. Watching you two is just too hot.”

“How does giving your banded mare sweet love get to be something to be sorry for?”

Shining is embarrassed, “I know you were planning to play in there but now I’ve muddied the playground.”

“Shining, my brother, did you think that lesson about body parts only applied to mares? If I trust you enough to share any body, I trust you enough to share every body. Besides, you want to play with Swift and AJ and there is certainly plenty of me in both of them.”

Turning back to Twilight, “Speaking of body sharing, we are far from done.”

I am still holding her on my lap so I lean a little and trace a nostril with my tongue. She gasps and I catch her upper lip with my teeth. She opens and leans into me for a throat deep kiss. Her wings unfurl and wrap completely around me pulling us together. I feel something electric around my erection? Her magic. It is pulling on me so I co-operate and shift her toward it as I roll my hips. She gasps and her eyes go wide as I slip into her without breaking the kiss. She tightens her wings around me as I begin to roll my hips up and down to make short strokes in her. She begins to hum, vibrating her body. That’s when I realize that there is a purple mist around us and an electric tingle all over my body. I cross my eyes to focus on her horn and yep, it is glowing. I’m going to try something. I released the kiss and reach up a little to gently lick up one side of her horn. Everything contracts at the same time in a brilliant flash of purple. Wow. That’s sensitive.

“You Okay Twi?”

“DON”T STOP”

She’s okay. I touch tongue tip to horn tip and feel the electricity again. All of her legs and wings are kneading my body as I lick down and around her horn. She is humming loud now. So I crane my neck and slip my mouth around her horn to begin sucking. It’s like I’m hit by lightning. My body contracts squeezing her between my mouth and my erection. I can’t thrust but it doesn’t matter. She’s got that Alicorn strength on the inside too. We’re both wrapped in a purple cocoon of light and bouncing wildly up and down.

Her horn is poking the back of my mouth but I don’t care. The pressure is close to explosion in my nuts. She tilts her head forward a little and the tip of her horn pushes into my throat. That does it. I hilt in her as my load pumps up my shaft. I can’t see anything but purple glare but I can feel her magic pouring into me as my load floods into her. I have no idea how long we were locked like that but it was insanely pleasurable.

We both go limp at the same time, slowly withdrawing from each other.

I rub cheeks with her, “Thank you, Twilight. That was far beyond anything that I had imagined.”

She looks me in the eye, “Thank you, John. I’m not sure anypony has ever had an experience like that but I pity them for their loss.”

“Holy shit! John, what have you done?” from AJ.

“John! Look at yourself!” from Shining.

I’m seeing things through a light purple haze but I figure that’s just a glare left over from being at ground zero for that light show.

“What’s the big deal?”

Shining walks over to us, “Sister, what have you done?”

I sit Twilight beside me and slide off the bed to stand. I’ve still got the purple glare but everything seems normal or better otherwise.

“Will somepony please tell me what is going on?”

Shining looks at me, “You really can’t see it, John? You’re the same color as Twilight now, mane and all.”

“Really. Eyes too?”

“Yes.”

“That explains why everything seems to have a purple tint. I guess it’s appropriate for a Prince to match His Princess.”

Cadance walks up right then, “I’m glad you’re taking this so calmly. Do you mind if I examine you?”

“Of course not. Why should I be excited? My cutie mark is unchanged and all the rest of the ponies have wild colors. Why shouldn’t I?”

Cadance is looking very puzzled now, “That is unmistakably Twilight’s color. The change happened while you and Twilight were being more intimate than ordinary. But I can detect only the faintest echo of Twilight. If this is her magic, so fresh and arising out of such strong emotion, her signature would be screaming at me out of it.”

I smile, “Cadance, I’m pretty sure I did this to myself. I haven’t told you but when I covered AJ for the first time, I changed into a fully physical pony. I had hooves, flare, and the whole nine yards. And I acted with pure pony instinct. I do normal pony things like cleaning feathers with my teeth that would drive a human bonkers. I have no idea how much I am going to change or if it will ever end. It may be a facet of my magic.”

Swift is gleeful, “I want to go with you the first time you walk through the Palace. The looks will be priceless.”

“The more I think about it, the more I like it. I’ve been looking for a way to exercise this part of my magic but I’ve been afraid I might do something that I couldn’t fix. This is perfect. I got no problem at all staying this way if I can’t change it back.

“Twilight, how do you feel? How do you feel about it? It felt like I was consuming your magic near the end. What did it feel like to you?”

Twilight is thoughtful, “John, right at the end I could feel you pumping your seed into me and I felt like I was pumping my magic down your throat into you. It just seemed like the most perfect thing in the world to be blending ourselves together like that. And I like your new color.”

“How about fatigue? Did I drain your magic or strength? Because I feel good. I’m wondering if you slipped a stamina spell in on me or something.”

Do I see a twinkle in the Twilight, “No spell, John, and I feel the same way. Do you think you turn into that pony stallion if you tried?”

“I have no idea but if I ever want to try it, in the room with two Alicorns watching over me is the place.”

I lay down so I won’t fall and reach for my magic. It’s ready and able. Then I reach for my inner pony. He’s there too. So I pour my magic into my inner pony and wait.

Shining says, “Wow!” rather loudly so I open my eyes.

WOW! is right. I can see all the way around the room sitting still. I pull my feet under me and stand up one end at a time. I’m still taller than everypony else but not by as much. I test my muscles and discover I have a tail. Not only that, I can turn my head all the way around and look at it. I’m still Twilight colored.

Cadance is studying me critically, “You are damned impressive, John, but you aren’t a pony. I’m guessing that this Fred’s horse body.”

I say ‘Yes, Fred has always been my ‘inner pony’ even before I knew he was there.’ What comes out is, “Neigh, grunt whinny whinny grunt snort snort neigh.” Oh yeah. Fred doesn’t have verbal parts.

Cadance asks, “Are you okay, John?”

I nod my head.

Swift comes forward, “Fred doesn’t talk like a pony at all. He speaks to John in his mind.”

I concentrate,

Try again,

Nothing. It’s Fred’s talent. I guess it takes his mind to work it. I’m getting distracted anyway. Twilight’s scent is overwhelming and I’m dropping. I start edging toward her. My focus is narrowing.

Twilight stares at me, “John Sampson! What are you thinking?”

I point with my nose.

Twilight looks conflicted, “That’s a little more than I was bargaining for.”

Damn. And it goes back quicker than it comes out. Not much else to do so I go back to the pad and lay down. I pour my magic into my inner human and I’m back in my old body. I even have my old color back.

AJ is pissed now, “John oh John, anytime you want to step out in that body you just come see me. I’ve had it and I like it.”

“AJ, be nice. Remember that is Twilight’s first experience. And I agree with her for other reasons. We don’t know if the sterility spell applies to that different body. For all we know my horse nuts are making horse sperm. When she slowed me down enough to think I realized how little we know about what we’re doing.”

Cadance is more practical, “Do you think you could learn to talk?”

“I think it’s not that kind of problem. I know how to talk and I have learned other aspects of that body with only minimal effort. But I did it in dreams where talking wasn’t a factor. That mouth simply doesn’t have the parts needed to make speech. What I need to do is learn to separate parts from the whole body. I just did that with color so I know it’s possible. Shining, I want those eyes! I can see the entire room without moving my head. That could be incredible in a fight.”

“Excuse me, stallions. You have fifty weeks to work that part of it out. We have another priority for the next couple of weeks.” Cadance says sternly.

I have a priority of my own, “Yes we do. And right now, it’s breakfast.”

Twilight is looking disappointed but I’m not real sympathetic at the moment.

By the time we pass through the shower on the way to the kitchen Swift has eggs, oatmeal, fruit, and cheese laid out. The tea wasn’t quite the same as Spike’s but it was plenty good enough.

“You mares might want to go shopping or otherwise take advantage of your free time. Twilight and I are tied down for now but you don’t have to be. It’s probably going to get loud in a little bit anyway.”

Twilight and I move to the upstairs library. The tables are still against the wall and that suits me. I might need the room later. We get comfortable on one of the big bean bags and start grooming.

“Is this all we’re going to do, John?”

“No, but we have all day so there’s no need to hurry.”

We are nuzzling and sharing breath when AJ comes in. She settles on the other side of me from Twilight and whispers in my ear.

“We figure Swift is next so Cadance and Shining took her shopping. We are going to try something new while they are gone. Just lay flat and let us do the work.”

I stretch out and the two hottest mares in Equestria start licking and nibbling every part of my body. I am passing half mast when they each bite an ear at the same time. I go ‘sproing’ and Twilight flies herself over me and drops down on me with her wings towards my head. I think I get harder watching them work. Then AJ lands on my face facing the same way as Twilight. I play chase the clit for a while as Twilight bounces up and down on me. Twilight begins clenching on me and shortly after a light show erupts with sound effects. Then she spreads her wings and flies straight up. AJ slips under her and drops on to my erection with hardly a beat missed. Twilight lands on my face and I begin chasing her clit.

They make a half dozen rotations before the inevitable happens. Twilight is clenching on me when I feel the pressure rising. Twilight begins to raise her wings but I reach up and grab her. Pushing up into her, I feel my favorite soft spot and start pumping my swimmers through it. When she realizes what is happening she pushes down and captures every drop.

We are laying in the afterglow with Twilight in the middle covering me and AJ with her wings. Twilight is humming as AJ and I nuzzle and groom her. We are all about as happy as it is possible to be.

We drift through a snack lunch and into an afternoon of small pleasures. Twilight drifts off while I am doing a wing and AJ is already napping so I sneak off to another room to play with my inner pony.

I reason that I have a horse image and a human image already so it shouldn’t be too hard to make more images. Specifically, I want to make an edited image. What I want is speech but that will be complicated. A voice box is easy but it won’t work without tongue, teeth, and lips to shape the sound. So I’m going to practice on something simple first, eyes. Eyes are self contained and the interpreter in the brain is flexible.

I make a second human image and decide to call him man-x. Then I go to the horse image and visualized the head. Narrowing my focus to the eyes, I chose my separation points carefully then make a copy of the eyes. Moving to the man-x I take out the human eyes at the same places and set the horse eyes in. I can’t find any flaws so pour my magic and wait a few seconds. Nothing feels different so I open my eyes and ‘Oh Shit!’.

They work, no doubt about that. The problem is that I no longer have peripheral vision. Everything is in focus and immediate. There is nothing that I can’t see except what I’m sitting on. The sheer size and number of images is overwhelming me. I can concentrate and ignore images down to a manageable level. Good. I Need A Mirror! So I go looking for one. The bathroom mirror is smaller and lower than ideal but it does reflect. My eyes are larger and canted more to the side now. The color is right but the pupil will never pass. It’s a horizontal bar. I’m getting the hang of it now so I’m declaring this a success.

Back in the same room I move myself back to my original human body. The next step is more complicated but I’m saved from deciding if I want to try it now by the sound of arrivals downstairs. The shoppers are back. I pass by the sleepers and down the stairs. We have ponies with packages.

Swift strikes first, “John, help me with these boxes.”

I pick up a couple of boxes and follow Swift to her personal room and set them down. She bumps the door close.

“John, Cadance and I made a deal. You are going to take her someplace out of sight and out of mind so she can play with your inner pony. I’m going to stay here with Shining and improve his education. Twilight knows it’s possible but I’ll make sure she’s up on it.”

“Dammit, does every mare in Equestria have a plan for my cover? I’m wounded, traded off like common goods.”

“Quit yur bitchin. We both know you’ve been aiming at that Alicorn since she walked in the door.”

“Yes, but I want to keep imagining that I’m the pursuer. If something happens, we’ll be in our pocket pasture.”

We go back down to the kitchen where dinner is being discussed. Life is rocking right along until I use the F word.

Twilight is disgusted, “You want fish!”

“Yes, Twilight, I want fish. I need protein, lots of protein.”

“Why do you suddenly need more protein?”

“Because I’ve been giving it all to you, Twilight.”

“What on Equestria are you talking about?”

“Twilight, semen is nearly pure protein.”

“I know that.”

“So where do you think it comes from? If you want your stallion to keep acting like a stallion you have to replenish his protein reserves.”

“Do I have to smell it?”

“No, I can leave.”

“For a few hours.”

Cadance speaks up, “Twilight, I’ll take him if you don’t want him. I don’t mind fish at all. In fact, I want some. It’s good for the feathers.”

“You’ll bring him back before tomorrow morning?”

“Yes, Twilight, and in good condition.”

“Okay, but I want one before dinner.”

That is my cue, “What about right now?” and I began to edge around the table.

Twilight is shocked, “Right here in the kitchen?”

I keep edging toward her, “Why not?”

“How will anypony make dinner if we’re banging away in the middle of the floor?”

“They’ll just have to work around us,” and I reach for her.

Twilight squeals and runs for the door. I wink at Swift and go after her, leaving the sound of laughter behind me in the kitchen. She is in the corner of the main room but when she sees me coming she takes to her wings and flies up the staircase.

I shout, “You think you can get away from me? This Castle isn’t big enough for you to get out of my reach.”

I take the stairs four steps at a time. At the top I see her disappearing through the master bedroom door and run after her. She is in the far corner and the instant she sees me she launches herself toward the door over my head. But I have more reach than that. I get a firm grip on both of her hind legs as she passes over me. She is an incredibly strong flier but not strong enough. I pull her down to the floor and reach between her wings to get a twisted handful of mane at the base of her neck, right where it’s thickest. I pull hard and her wings and tail all go straight up as her bare backside slams into my leg. I’m rock hard by now and on the second poke I feel her lips part and gush nectar on me as I slam into her.

This pure raw pony mating. I’m pushing hard and deep with a guttural burst on every stroke. She’s squealing and whinnying in time to my grunting. I can feel her clenching on me with increasing strength. I’m pulling harder on her mane trying to get a little deeper before I lose my load when the room is filled with blinding purple light. She bellows at full volume as I empty into her depths. I’m still pumping as I relax on to her back. Her wings come down and back to cover and hold me. We hold that embrace for a minute then I fall limply out of her and we separate.

“Twilight, we are going to have to do that outdoors some day. Think of how much fun we could have with more room.”

“I like that idea, John. Maybe tomorrow.”

“Let’s go get a shower and dinner.”

The fish turns out to be smoked salmon. That suits me just fine. Add a little bread, cheese, fruit for dessert, and tea and I’m good. Apparently the same goes for Cadance. We almost have a fight over the last piece.

Cadance is concerned, “I hope you aren’t going to fall out on me. That was a big meal after a hard day.”

I laugh, “Don’t worry. I’ve been using a lot of magic today and I’ll use more if I feel any fatigue.”

“You can do that?”

“Yep. And I can keep myself warm and several other useful things.”

“This is going to be interesting. When will you be ready to start?”

“Now?”

“Where?”

“Let’s go to the main room.”

“I think we need more room than that.”

“I know we do. We are going to teleport to a place I will show you. Be careful when you are in my mind. The human stuff will make no sense and can be ignored but there are some demons chained in the basement. Stay away from them.”

We stand in the main room and I bend down so she can touch her horn to my head. I picture our pocket pasture on the farm and we are there.

“Cadance looks around, “You are right, John. This is perfect.”

“I won’t be able to talk after I change but I will understand and can do simple signs. Tell me exactly what you want.”

“I heard you tell Twilight that her Alicorn strength didn’t impress you. That’s what I’m looking for, a stallion that’s stronger than I am. I heard you and Shining say you were equal in strength and I know Shining is nowhere near my strength. So is Twilight weak or is somepony lying?”

“You should have asked for the details, Cadance. We are equal in pony muscle vs human muscle. We are also equal in magic vs magic. The part you missed is that I express my magic through my muscles. The contest that Steel stopped was my leg muscles against Shining’s shield. The only thing you have to remember is that I’m not real practiced or coordinated at full strength but I doubt you could test even a tenth of it.”

I swear her wings went up with an audible snap.

I sit so there will be no confusion on the transfer from two legs to four and summon my inner horse. Pulling all four legs under me, I stand. Looking around and sniffing, I oriented myself. Fence, over there. Creek, over there. Pile, back there. Mare, right in front of me.

I step toward her and carefully touch noses. Inhaling, I drink in her scent. Definitely excited. I murr deep in my chest as I nibble her shoulder. She’s trembling. Good. I think she is beginning to appreciate my strength. With a loud squeal she bolts. This is going to be fun. I catch her easily and nip her shoulder again to turn her. She tries to kick me but that just costs her speed. I block her path and she turns. Catching up to her again, I nip her flank. We run back and forth across the pasture several times jumping the creek each time. This is a strong mare. Just the way I like them.

She finally gives up. She’s winded and sweating. I’m feeling good. I sniff her again and taste her sweat. Very nice. She is still trembling but now knows the futility of trying to escape me. I reach under and lip her teats. She squeals and spreads her legs. She’s learning. Her tail is tight but a gentle nip gets it out of the way. She’s wet and swollen. I taste her nectar. It’s wonderful. I’m dropping now. I take another taste and raise my head. Closing my nostrils I inhale her scent and verify her readiness. I’m hard now and my balls are withdrawing.

I step behind her and rest my chin on her back. She spreads her legs and squats. I slide up her rump until my erection hits her butt. Reaching between her upraised wings I take a mouthful of mane. I’ve got a firm grip on her barrel too so she isn’t going anywhere until I’m satisfied. I probe with my erection and I’m rewarded with softness and wet. A small thrust gets me partway in. Walking my hind legs forward while pulling with my neck gets the rest of me in. My medial ridge is sliding in and out as I thrust.

I like this mare. She’s tight and getting tighter as I flare. I’m bottoming too. She’s going to get the full load. We’ve got a good rhythm going now and she’s beginning to sparkle. It’s becoming hard to move inside her as my flare stretches her. My load has already started down my shaft but I’m not finished. I push each pulse as deep into her as it will go. She’s feeling it. Her horn is bright now. Then the final pressure is released and I throw my head up and scream my triumph to the world. Her horn flashes as bright as a small sun as her scream joins mine.

I’m trying to hold myself in her to wring every last drop out but I’m shrinking. In a few seconds I fall limp and out of her. Slowly I slide back and off her. She immediately pisses copiously. I walk up beside her and nuzzle her cheek.

“Oh, John. If that was ten percent I know exactly why Celestia wants you so bad. I want to take you home and keep you.”

I step off and lay down. Shifting my magic, I resume my human body.

“Under the terms of my agreement with Celestia you can’t own me but you can rent me on occasion, like tonight.”

“Can I rent you too?” asked a shape in the darkness.

“Yes you can, Luna. I even told Celestia to consider a tandem rental with you.”

“How about a tandem rental with Cadance?”

“That’s up to Cadance. I’ve committed to her. But you can pick me up any time you can talk Twilight into it.”

Cadance says, “you can take him for a test ride if you wish but be careful, he’s stronger than he looks.”

This is going to be a very interesting night.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Sixteen )

It’s been three wild, wonderful weeks of hell. I never imagined that I’d say it but I’ve done enough cover for a while. I got in trouble again when somepony rousted Celestia to check on her sister because the stars were wobbling. No more covering Luna after dark. AJ is absolutely insane when the full heat hits her. Swift is just Swift only hotter and tighter. And Twilight is a whole new pony, a mare now. She feels more like a Princess than the foal playing a Princess that she was previously. And I’m settling into life as a working Prince

There’s been nary a peep out of Blueblood. The thinking is that after what he witnessed last time, his next attempt will be much better planned. So will my response.

Right now we are on our way to the Apple farm. The Prince has decided to assist the Duchess in making up for lost planting time. The other Duchess is taking care of the Prince. And I am going to work on my inner pony. I’ll spend as much time as I can in the horse body so I can get used to it.

I announce, “Rise and shine everypony. Ponyville Station ahead.”

AJ and Swift stretch and gather saddle bags. We plan to exit the train and station as quickly as possible with the aim of missing Pinkie. The train is still moving as I step to the platform and stride briskly into the storm of confetti.

“Hello, Pinkie.”

“Hello Prince John.Isn’t this just great?You’re Royal now.And AJ.And Swift.It’s so beautiful.”

“Yes, Pinkie, we like it too.”

“We’re going to have the biggest party.And”

“No, Pinkie. We’re in a hurry. We need to get the farm in order for spring.”

“That’s O K we’ll just have a bigger party later.”

And she zips off across the platform in search of her next victim. A truly horrible idea crossed my mind right then, Pinkie in heat. Could that be the trigger for the apocalypse?

I am wearing my uniform and sword plus Swift and AJ are wearing nice bags with the Royal Crest. We cut a fine figure striding through town and out to the farm. Big Mac spots us just before we reach the farmhouse.

“Whoa! Is this a Royal Visitation?”

I couldn’t resist. “Eeyup.”

Everypony laughs and we are home again. Granny Smith is in the kitchen when we pass through the house heading for the bedroom.

She nails me, “Where do you think you’re going?”

“To the bedroom to change?”

“No weapons in the house. There’s a rack by the front door.” She has me there.

So I left sword and scabbard in the rack but I made sure the pommel shows.

We drop our gear and I change into shorts. Big Mac is in the storage barn.

I ask, “What do you need most, Big Mac? And where is Fred?”

He replies, “Fred has the big coarse harrow in the south west carrot field. If you could follow him with the big fine harrow we could knock out a field a day. The mares can get the seed sorted and ready on a wagon and we’ll be right behind you. We’re late with the carrots and need to hurry.”

“Get me a single harness and show me the harrow.”

He does and when it is ready I take off my shorts and sit down.

“Big Mac, you’re going to see something I don’t hide but I don’t advertise either. I will try to talk to you immediately but I have no idea if it will work. I can understand regardless and answer with signs.”

“John . . .”

I change into my horse body and stand.

“Oh. . .”

“John, you should warn ponies better.”

He can’t hear me. Damned.

Big Mac looked at me, “Fred says he can hear you and will tell me if you need anything.”

I nod my head.

Big Mac asked, “Has Fred seen you like this?”

I shook my head ‘no’.

“I want to be there the first time he sees you.”

I walk to the front of the harrow and pump the up peddle until it is road high then I stick my head in the harness and wave ‘come on’ with my nose.

Big Mac leads the way to the field Fred is working. I am lining the harrow up on the corner where Fred started while Big Mac goes out to meet Fred. Fred was at the far end of the field when we got here. I drop the harness and step behind a tree.

Big Mac shouts, “Hey, Fred. John is here. He’s over there with the fine harrow.

Fred drops his harness and heads my way so I step out from behind the tree.

Fred starts bucking and dancing around.

Fred finally gets tired of inspecting ‘Little Fred’ and we get to work. I am striding along with the harrow while Big Mac goes back for the mares and the seed. They got four good rows in before dinner time. I stop by the storage barn and change bodies. Fun fact: dirt doesn’t make the change with me.

We have just got into some serious eating when Granny pounces, “Where did you get that sword?”

“It was a gift.”

She’s not satisfied, “Who gave it to you?”

“You’ve obviously looked at it. Whose sigil is on it?”

She’s narrowing in, “That’s a royal sword. Only a member of the Royal Herd should carry it.”

“You are absolutely right.”

AJ and Swift are both giggling now.

Granny is not going to give up, “So a member of the Royal Herd gave that to you?”

“Of course. The member whose sigil is on it gave it to me. Did you look at the scabbard?”

“Yes. It’s got the entire Royal Herd on it. Obviously property of a Royal.”

“You are half right this time. It is property of a Royal but four members of the Royal herd are not on it.”

“The only member of the Royal Herd missing is Shining Armor. Is it his?”

“It’s too big for Shining and obviously made for somepony with hands. And the other three members of the Royal Herd just joined. The sword is a welcome gift.”

Granny is wound tight enough I’m getting worried about her so I end the game.

“We joined the Royal Herd, Granny. I’m a Prince of the Realm and AJ and Swift are Duchesses. I’m not sure what that makes you but you’re noble now.”

It takes Apple Bloom about three quarters of a second to pick that up, “OH BOY! I’m a Princess!”

I hate to kill that party, but, “I’m sorry Bloom honey but you’re not old enough and you have a lot of studying to do first. Twilight Sparkle is the newest Princess and she has to study so much she lives in a library.”

That didn’t slow her much at all, “I can do that. I can’t wait to tell Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle.”

Granny is grinning again. I guess she forgives me for the tease.

We get nearly two hundred acres of carrots and two hundred and forty acres of corn planted. AJ knows the Pegasus in charge of the local weather so she arranges for some rain on those fields and we have a day off. That makes it time to work on my second project. I am becoming very comfortable in my horse body but I really need a pony body too. Not being able to talk is annoying me.

Swift and AJ have gone shopping with a long list provided by Granny. Now that we have farm, Guard, and Royal accounts to draw on we can afford a few luxuries. I want some ‘exotic’ foods like smoked salmon.

I pick a shady spot in the orchard and get comfortable. I have made a copy of my inner horse and called him my inner pony but had never used him. I study my inner human carefully and pick out the larynx parts I want and copy them. I make a place for them in my pony body and paste them in. A little adjustment is needed but it looks workable. I move into that body and try to recite the alphabet.

“ay, ee, ee, ee, ee, fa, ga”

Something wasn’t going just right. After twenty minute of frustration I figure it out. My voice is coming out of my nose. When I close my nose, my lips won’t cooperate. Generally, the equine tongue and pharynx aren’t adaptable enough either. I need a pony. Specifically, I need a pony face with all the internal parts included. Now all I have to figure out is how to get one.

Fred gave me this pattern so I assume he could give me another one, if he had a different pattern. Big Mac is the only other pony he talks to so it would have to Big Mac, If he could do it and If Big Mac agreed. Or I could talk a Unicorn or an Alicorn into it. The first problem with that is all of the Alicorns are mares and I’d rather not look and sound like a mare. So I need a fairly strong Unicorn stallion. That leaves Shining or Steel and I have unfinished business with Shining.

We get another nearly four hundred acres planted in the next two weeks. That is what I like about ponies. If anything needs doing, it gets done. Eight hundred acres will make for respectable harvest. So we are on our way back to Canterlot with a stop at the weather office to get those fields watered.

AJ’s friend is in. She’s a young Pegasus mare named Rainbow Dash. I am standing in front of the office with Swift when AJ comes out with her.

“So this is the big stud that makes you squeal?”

I just smile.

Rainbow continued, “He’s big enough. What else is he good for?”

AJ’s smiles, “He pulls a team of four plow by himself.”

Rainbow guffaws, “The Prince pulls a plow? Too bad he can’t fight.”

I smile bigger, “I’ve been looking for a Pegasus sparring partner. You’re a little small but I’d let you try out.”

Wings out and the whole display, “Do you really think you could keep up with me, pretty colt?”

“Rainbow, I would do everything I could to not hurt you.”

AJ is laughing now, “Rainbow, he beat shining Armor in an all day match. He’s serious about not hurting you.”

That lit Rainbow’s fuse, “If you’re afraid to fight me just enter the Ironpony. I’ll beat you there.”

“Sorry, I’m more likely to be judging. And I didn’t beat Shining. Steel stopped the match.”

Rainbow is ready for that, “Yeah, I bet he was afraid Shining was going to hurt you.”

Swift answers, “No, he was afraid they were going to hurt the Castle.”

AJ nods. Rainbow looks startled, “Now I’m impressed. Just let me know when your ready for that match.”

“Got a mat handy? Or some grass?”

“Sorry, dude. I’m on duty right now.”

I turn to Swift, “Want to wait for the night train?”

Swift ‘thought’ about it for a minute, then, “No, I have work that needs doing.”

So I turn back to Rainbow, “Any time you want, just show up at the Castle. We’ll make time for you. If you want to make it interesting, bring some friends, at least twenty.”

We left Rainbow sputtering.

AJ saw us to the train then headed back to worry about weeds and bugs.

Spike comes bouncing out of the kitchen to greet us as we walk in, “Hi, Dad!”

I have claimed Spike as juvenile relative with the Guard to get him an ID and some local stallion role models. He needs some as the lone juvenile stallion in a world of ultra powerful mares. So there it is, right on the ID, sire: Major John Sampson. Swift is tickled to no end to be stepmother to a dragon.

“Hello, Spike. All you have to do to earn my undying love is not serve apples. Twilight upstairs?”

Spike looks thoughtful, “John, if you don’t like apples, why did you band into the biggest apple farm in the land? Twilight is in her library.”

“First, I love AJ, her farm is incidental. Second, I like apples, just not multiple dishes with every meal every day. I’m going to check in with her.”

Twilight is deep in thought with books and notes spread across two tables. When she sees me she bounces up and over to lean against me and rub cheeks. I wrap my arms around her, pulling her against me and she wraps her wings around me tightening the embrace. Oh my, this is worth weeks away to come home to.

After a long minute we break the embrace and step back.

“What’s this about you adopted Spike?”

“That is one of those fortunate accidents. I got him a Guard ID by claiming him as a juvenile relative. I figured it would make some things easier for him and get him exposed to some stallion role models. The clerk filling out the form could only find one stallion in his herd not related to his dam, you, so I have to be his sire. He seems to have taken it and run with it.”

“Well, I’m proud of you even if you didn’t ask. A lot of stallions will not accept a foal not related by blood. You even bypass species.”

“Look at yourself, Twilight. That greeting you just put on me would have driven you to a panic attack a few months ago. Swift is right. The foal is gone and a beautiful confident mare has taken her place. That’s what the lack of a good stallion role model did to you. Now imagine a full grown dragon with a messed up head. How could I not help a friend out of a situation like that?”

“You have a number of messages. Celestia wants to see you informally. Steel wants to know when you get back. The armorers have something for you. The doctor wants to examine your inner pony. And I want you in my bed.”

Celestia is holding Court so ‘informal’ will have to wait. Steel will likely have something to add to the list but is worth being right with so I’ll start there.

His clerk waves me through. He jumps up behind his desk to bow to me so I salute him and we both chuckle. I get comfortable and he closes the door.

I said, “I’m officially back, at least for now. Farm life is good and my inner horse loves it.”

Steel nods, “Everything here is calm. Your legend has grown another notch. It’s hard to miss the difference in Twilight. And I have a report that you will probably want to address personally. It involves loud noises and colored lightning on several occasions from a region between the Everfree and Sweet Apple Acres. It’s been suggested that it might be another arrival similar to yours.”

“Did that report also mention anything about wobbly stars?”

“No but there was some mention of those here at about the same time.”

“Who made the report?”

“It was made by the local weather Pegasi at the request of a number of local officials. The are asking for a squad to investigate. Am I correct in assuming that you are involved in this somehow?”

“For the record, I am completely aware of everything that happened and there is no danger or concern for anypony anywhere. The rest is Royal business and nopony else’s.”

“John, you’ve told me you have a favorite playground somewhere around there. Are you telling me you took a Unicorn out there?”

“Nope.”

“An Alicorn?

“I can’t tell you that.”

Steel nodded, “I understand. The report was made by Rainbow Dash, who is one of the Element Bearers and a very stubborn pony. You might want to pay her a personal visit.”

“We’ve met. In fact, I just came from arranging rain for the farm so I know what you mean. Prince John relieves you of this responsibility.”

“Thank you. I’ve heard the armorers have something ready for you. Want to go check it out?”

“Hell yes. I might even wear it to this conversation just for the effect.”

They did good. They not only have a beautiful and fully functional sword, somepony had put some thought into a scabbard. It has a belt with a broad strap that goes from just outside of my left knee to the belt then up and over my right shoulder and back to the belt in the front. There is a short and fairly wide mouthed scabbard on the bottom and two hooks for the cross even with my right shoulder. The hooks have some spring action to them so the sword takes a lot of effort to start up but will be free almost immediately. It could be extremely dangerous for anypony too close behind me but I can get it around and into action about as fast as a conventional sword. I like it a lot and say so.

The sword has my mark in the pommel and the entire Royal Herd engraved on the blade with Celestia on top and me on the bottom. Celestia’s mark and mine were slightly larger than the rest. Holy crap, this is naming me herd stallion and protector.

I put it all on and head for the lab. Making sure everypony is clear, I dial up my strength a little and practice drawing and swinging it. It is sweet.

One of the armorers tells me, “That post over there is our proof test. It’s extra hard wood. Hit it hard as you can. The depth will tell us how hard you hit and any flaws in the blade will come out then.”

So I square off with the post and it feels like cutting bread, mushy with drag but no real resistance. I cut the post clean through.

They are just beaming, “The blade is enchanted to be unbreakable and always sharp. You just proved it.”

“I don’t know how to say it. The first blade you made saved my life and my hope for this one is to save Equestria. Good work, hell, great work.” And we bow to each other.

I’ve got to find some challenges for those two.

I leave Steel at his office and still have a couple of hours left so I head for the doctor. The double takes at my new sword are hilarious. The admin nurse doesn’t question anything. Major John was too much for her so Prince John is scary.

I unbuckle my sword and get undressed in the exam room. Doctor Red comes right in.

“What’s this about a pony body?”

I sigh, “I’m working on one but I’m not there yet. I do have a complete and fully functional horse body. I’ll show you in a minute but first you have to know that the horse body has practically no vocal ability. I can understand you but I can only answer by things like head movements or pointing.”

“Go ahead.”

So I bend over and shift before my hooves hit the floor. The doctor blinks then starts a normal exam.

“Do you have your magic in this shape?”

I nod.

“I can hear the multiple heartbeat so there is no doubt it is your body. Your skeletal structure is subtly different but within the realm of possible for a pony. The same applies to most of your organs with the eyes being the most striking difference.”

He looks at my mouth carefully, “No, you’ll never speak understandably with that structure unless there’s a translation spell of some kind.”

I change back and say, “I’d like a semen sample taken too. I’ve got a sterility spell on my human body and I’d like to be sure it applies to this body too.”

“I can tell you that already, it does. Any Unicorn can see it if they know where to look.”

“Good, I’ll still have to find out if I’m making pony sperm or horse sperm but I’ll leave that until I have the sterility spell removed.”

I promise the doctor to come back for that fertility exam and some other detail work and then I promise myself some dinner.

Swift is sitting at the table. Twilight is deep in whatever she has going on in her library. Spike is ranting at Twilight.

So I get involved, “Hello, Twilight.”

“mumble mumble”

“You’ve got to do better than that, Twilight.”

“In a minute.”

Spike just looks disgusted, “It’s been ‘in a minute’ for forty five minutes now.”

“Last chance, Twilight.”

“Just one more minute.”

I count it down then reach over and grasp Twilight around the barrel lifting her and walking toward the stairs. It gets loud.

“Twilight, language like that in front of Spike?”

That slows her down.

“You need to eat. I need to eat. And we need to talk. After dinner the problem will still be here.”

“Put me down. I’ll eat. But someday you’ll go too far.”

“That relates to one of the subjects I want to discuss. Please take a good look at my new sword in the rack next to the front door.”

“I don’t care about stallion games.”

“It’s not the blade I want you to see. It’s the decorations.”

A very somber Twilight came to the table.

“Does that mean what I think it means, John?”

“I know almost as much about it as you do. I am going to be standing next to Celestia when she raises the sun in the morning and it will most certainly figure into the conversation somewhere. When I leave there I will have to run an errand to Ponyville. When I return I will come home to here.”

Swift wants to know, “What’s in Ponyville that we just missed?”

“I’ve got to clean up your mess.”

Swift is surprised, “My mess?”

“Yeah. Remember that deal you made with Cadance? Well the locals are demanding an investigation of the loud noises and bright lights from our campsite.”

“Oh no. You made those lights and noises. That’s another of your messes, not mine.”

Twilight is giggling and Spike is just confused.

I have sympathy for Spike, “It was one of those heat week events, Spike.”

We groom a little while then pile in the bedroom.

I love the feel of feathers. But a small voice is saying, “Zero four hundred, John.” So I must put them aside and stumble to the toilet. I hear Swift doing the same on the other side.

Spike has that wonderful tea ready and a few cups later I am beginning to resemble life. This morning will be different. I will dress in an official uniform and carry my sword when I leave here and have breakfast but no PT.

There is an electric atmosphere when I step into the cafeteria. Everypony rises and bows. Swift heads for the window to get our food. I acknowledge and take my seat. My sword takes the seat next to mine. There’s a lot of quiet conversations going on around the room.

Swift brings my favorite and we eat quietly.

“Swift, you don’t have to go with me.”

“I want to. And you need somepony to watch your back.”

“You can’t go with me when I speak with the Princesses. You’ll have to wait in the throne room.”

“I understand.”

“I wish you could. It’s an experience that more ponies should have, standing between Luna and Celestia as they change the night to day.”

Luna is sitting on Her Throne looking bored.

“Hail, John Sampson and Swift Trail.”

“Hello, Your Majesty.” And bow to her.

“Thou art here with the ultimate goal of Audience with Celestia.”

“She has asked for me but I choose to visit with friends also.”

“Well said, friend John. Let us adjourn to somewhere more comfortable.”

She rises and we follow her to the garden behind the Throne Room.

She seats herself and, “Have great care, friend John. I believe that Celestia be building a Throne for thee. Accepting it wouldst mean the end of many things for thou.”

“Have you seen my new sword, Luna. It makes a very interesting read.”

I turn to make it easy for Her to see.

“Truly, friend John, this confirms thy fate. Thou must admit to walking merrily to thyne gallows.”

“I don’t see that.”

“This season last, thou covered every mare of the Royal Herd save one. Thy be one short step from Herd Stallion. Thy sword shouts My Sister’s intention to take that step.”

“Friend Luna, will you grant me a small favor? I wish for Swift to accompany us to the balcony and witness the Majesty of the Sisters. It would not be safe for her to witness Celestia’s machinations so you would have to bring her back down to wait for me in the Throne Room.”

“It would be my pleasure, friend John.”

“By the way, it will amuse you to know that we will travel to Ponyville when we are done here for the purpose of allaying fears of a magical disturbance some weeks ago in a small pasture between the Apple farm and the Everfree Forest.”

That gets a full laugh from Luna, “Oh, John. Were we so loud?”

“It seems a habit with me.”

Swift is looking disturbed.

“Friend Swift, be thou enjoying thy introduction to the Royal lifestyle?”

Swift replies, “It’s my fault. John was there because I made a deal with Cadance to trade time with him for time with Shining.”

Luna casts a sympathetic look at Swift, “And how did it come to pass that Cadance was there at that moment? Because Celestia invited Her? This be the very nature of life with My Sister.”

Luna motions for us to follow. We trace the familiar path to the special balcony where Celestia is waiting. I’m getting used to it but Swift is frozen in awe. Then it is done and I’m heading to confrontation with Celestia. Luna is shepherding an awestruck Swift.

We make our way to a familiar kitchen where two cups of tea are waiting.

Celestia is all smiles, “I am proud of what you’ve done for Twilight. My faith in you has been more than justified.”

I smile back, “Thank you, just remember that I did it for Twilight, not for you.”

“I have heard that you are on your way to Ponyville to attend to some Royal Affairs.”

“I’d say more like squash a Royal Affair.”

“I see you’re wearing your new sword. How do you like it?”

“I love it. The decorations confuse me, though.”

“You know what it means. We need to break you in gradually and get to work on that plan of yours at the same time. Next season we can confirm your full status. You can start by sitting court with Twilight occasionally.”

“Be explicit, Celestia. You know I won’t be a figurehead.”

“Herd Stallion, Consort to me and co-ruler should be enough. If your plan to improve the herd works as well as your plan to improve Twilight, you will have earned it.”

"What will Luna do?"

"Luna will do as she does now except for fewer boring government functions. She will like it better.

"And you think the Blueblood herd will just accept their loss of status?”

“Will they have a choice?”

“They will always have choices, just maybe no good ones. Beware of ponies that believe the first step to winning a thing is making sure that you don't. And Celestia, no matter what the world sees or believes, my mares are protected. That is absolute and includes Twilight.”

“I have no problem with that, John. You have some of the finest mares in Equestria. Your band will be making the finest foals, exactly what we need.”

I make my way back to the Throne Room and collect Swift. She is still somewhat in shock but she has a message from Luna.

“Luna said to take the Royal Train. The Herd Stallion rates it and it will get us there and back before lunch.”

Luna must have ordered it readied because they were just pulling up to the platform when we got to the station. We board and are on our way.

Swift is sorting through many things, “John, what have we got ourselves into? The Sisters have the power of goddesses and we are taking to Royal train to Ponyville because you covered one of them. It hurts my head to think about.”

“Swift, it’s going to get worse before it gets better. Celestia is herd mare to all ponies. She is going to do what is best for the greater herd no matter how it affects any individual. That isn’t a bad thing but she’s been alone in this position for a thousand years. She has lost many things we take for granted and doesn’t remember what she’s lost.”

We ride along deep in thought for a while then the train begins to slow. We are approaching Ponyville.

“Please, John, take AJ there as soon as you can. She needs to know who they really are.”

It is morning in Ponyville. The world is shiny and new as ponies begin the day’s business. We head for the weather office across town.

There it is organized chaos when walk in. They are getting the day’s assignments out. Rainbow Dash is in the back of the room directing things.

Rainbow looks up, “If you have any changes you better make them fast. The crew is leaving in minutes.”

“No changes. This is an official visit. Get your crews out then we'll talk privately.”

A few seconds later I heard a gasp behind me. Somepony has noticed my sword. More ponies arrive and there is a hushed conference.

“We’re sorry, Ma’am. We didn’t know.”

They’re bowing to Swift.

Swift turns on them and opens up in her best Sergeant to worm voice, “You still don’t know. Read the rest of it!”

“Ma’am, we don’t recognize the mark in the Stallion’s position.”

I turn slightly and pull my pants down enough to expose my flank. Several exclamations followed.

“Forgive us Your Majesty.”

My point is made, “Nothing to forgive. The Title is new so you wouldn’t know. Get on with your jobs so I can get my business done.”

In a few minutes we are walking into an office behind Rainbow. Swift closes the door behind us.

Rainbow bows and motions for me to take her chair, “Please forgive me for my conduct yesterday. I didn’t know about your Title.”

“I didn’t either, Rainbow. Celestia made the decision while I was working with AJ on the farm. I’m wearing the sword to accustom myself to the weight because I got it after returning to Canterlot yesterday. But I’m here because you have made inquiry into Royal business, my personal Royal business.”

“The only inquiry I’ve sent was to the Guard to ask for an investigation of unknown phenomena near the Everfree. Is that it?

“The very same. I was there myself for all events and I can state absolutely that there is no danger or concern for anypony anywhere. The rest is nopony’s business.”

“Is there anything else I can tell the mayor? Several ponies are worried it may be something dangerous.”

“Like me? You can tell them that I said it was my personal business and that I might consider too much curiosity as a personal challenge.

“Rainbow, you’re not stupid. Take what you know about ponies in general, what you know about these incidents, and what you learned today and put it all together. You’ll figure it out and then you will never say a word unless you want a whole flock of pissed Alicorns after your ass. Use me as a club to scare the mayor into line.”

“Yes, Your Majesty. And thank you.”

“And just for your information, AJ is a Duchess too.”

“Good to know.”

We head off to visit AJ on the farm and let her in on the news.

We walk in the kitchen door to find Granny baking and AJ in the front room updating records. I draw my sword and prop next to the door. It is just too much for the rack.

“Where’s Big Mac?”

AJ replies, “He’s in the barn doing wagon maintenance.”

I turn to Swift, “Could you go get him?”

She runs out the door.

AJ is curious now, “I’m not mad but I am wondering, why are you back so soon?”

“I have an announcement to make but I want Big Mac in on it too.”

Swift comes in the door with Big Mac about half a minute later.

“Granny, since you are an expert on swords, could you please come read this one?”

She walks up to it and stretches to get a good look at the top of the blade.

“This definitely from the Royal Armory. It has their signature all over it. The whole Royal Herd is on it including AJ and Swift. And it has John listed as Herd Stallion opposite Celestia.”

Big Mac recovers first, “John, who all did you have in the pocket pasture?”

“I can’t give you details except to say they were all Alicorns.”

“No wonder it was so loud.”

Granny has fallen over and is laughing so hard she can barely breathe.

“I . . . I . . . told you . . . he is a good stallion.”

“Granny, you know we can’t let that get outside the Herd?”

“Of course, colt”

AJ is looking worried, “Where does this leave me and Swift?”

“AJ, my exact words this very morning, ‘no matter what the world sees or believes, my mares are protected. That is absolute and includes Twilight’. Celestia agreed. Get Swift to tell you what her morning was like.”

Swift took a deep breath, “AJ, we stood between Luna and Celestia as they lowered the moon and raised the sun. There is a lot more to the Royal Herd than just being Royal. You need to go and experience it for yourself. You especially need to talk with Luna for a while.”

We have more stops to make so we say goodbye after a short detour to see Fred. My first priority is Rarity.

As we are walking in the door Rarity gushes, “Your Majesty, come right in. I’ve been waiting for you.”

“Then you know what I need if I’m going to be holding Court. You might also want to allow for this sword on a few outfits.”

“You can have anything that you can dream of. I’ve spoken with Twilight and you deserve it for what you’ve done for her.”

“Rarity, everything I did, I did for Twilight. Period. You owe me nothing and I will pay you if I have to toss gold bricks through the window. And I’m ‘John’ when we’re private. Save the pomp and circumstance for official functions.”

“Okay, John. What else can I do for you?”

“Upgrade Swift and AJ too. No great hurry, just deliver it to the Palace when you’re done or set a date for fitting. I may be traveling but not for long.”

We pass through the cafe and get a big box lunch. The train is ready to go when we get to the station. We board and that is it. Nothing to do but enjoy lunch and grooming until we get to Canterlot.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Seventeen )

Twilight is unhappy. We are assigned to hold Court tomorrow morning. It is bad enough that she has to interrupt her studies but she has been instructed by Celestia to let me lead and only become involved if I ask. I’m trying to explain to her that this is Celestia testing me. Can I represent the Herd or will I go to pieces under public pressure? It’s the same kind of thing that her brother had to survive. Besides, if I can get good enough to solo, she gets more time for research. That penetrates.

Then I have an idea. What about Spike? Yes, it is perfectly acceptable for Spike to be there to answer protocol questions. So if a foreign ambassador shows up by surprise I can ask Spike how to greet them etc.

Swift and Spike role play with me to give me more of a feel for common Court matters. Twilight gets to go back to whatever is consuming her in the library. When we break for dinner Spike has only to threaten to summon me to get Twilight to the table. Afterwards we groom and talk until pile time.

Feathers. Soft, warm feathers. And that small voice, “Zero four hundred, John.” Slip carefully out from under the feathers and off the pad. It’s morning. Bounce off the wall and into the bathroom. Dodge Swift coming back out and head for the kitchen. Give me caffeine! Begin life.

Swift joins us and dives into her tea but Twilight doesn’t show. I stretch and get into my cammies. Still no Twilight.

“Spike, we’re going to breakfast and PT. I will be at the Throne Room before zero eight hundred. If Twilight isn’t there, I will come get her. Be sure you tell her that.

We walk into the cafeteria to sighs of relief. John is back and the world is going to be okay. I’m feeling extravagant so I go for a chicken and cheese omelet. The cook said it would take some time and I said I didn’t care if I had some fruit to keep me alive.

There are some new faces in the room. They’re easy to spot, they’re the ones that can’t stop staring. The ‘old hooves’ are explaining it to them. When my food is ready the cook just calls my name and the newbies buzz again. This is fun to watch.

PT goes as usual other than one of the newbies that has joined us. She looks up and sees me coming with a deadpony in each hand and freaks. Swift gets her calmed down and she apologizes. We shower and change to be ready for Court and yep, they are lined up at the door with our frightened newbie in the lead. They bow and I salute.

When I get to the Throne Room a Night Guard shows me to Luna’s private office. Luna greets me with a hug.

“Art thou ready, John Sampson?”

“No, but that won’t stop me. I’m worried about Twilight. She is having some sort of block.”

“Dost thou know where she be?”

“In her tower last I looked. I left word that I would come get her at eight if she wasn’t here.”

“Oh, friend John, that be not wise when anypony can teleport. I feel her presence not in the Castle.”

“Could you detect Spike if he were in the tower?”

“I be blind to all save Alicorn, Unicorn, and Thou.”

Interesting. Turning to Swift, “Check the tower and bring Spike if you find him.”

Back to Luna, “Is there a way to find or communicate with her?”

“Not if she chooses to block.”

“Okay, then we do without. Who has the list of cases?”

It is nothing but contract renewals and proclamations. All simple and easy. After lunch we have a boundary dispute that may require some thought.

Swift comes back without Spike. Damned.

But Swift has news, “Spike will be here before Court starts and may bring Twilight. He was very upset because Twilight told him that you were abandoning them then teleported out herself. I told him what you said at AJ’s and he calmed down. He has a way to send letters to Twilight no matter where she is, so he is trying that.”

“That explains a lot. If the list doesn’t change it’s nothing but simple anyway so we’ll survive.”

Spike shows but Twilight doesn’t. So I sit in the big chair with Spike on one side and Swift on the other. I manage to read all the Proclamations without stumbling over the flowery language. Then the contracts begin.

Step right up. Time to renew the contract. Did any terms change since last renewal? No. Is X Department satisfied with the service/item? Yes. Renewed. Next. And right on down the lines until something went wobbly.

It happened at ‘Did any terms change?’. The price more than doubled for trail rations.

“What’s changed that you need more than twice the bits?”

“We had a blight in our orchards and have to ship fruit from another orchard at a much higher cost.”

“Have you tried to find a better source?”

“We haven’t found one.” Not exactly what I asked.

“Have you considered subbing the manufacturing until you can get your farm in order? It will be much cheaper to ship the product without all the rinds, peels, and cores. I can give you a little room until you recover but more than double means a new RFP.”

“I don’t know about that. I’ll have to ask my boss.” Why is he so nervous?

“The contract ends in ninety days. You have thirty days to explore your options and bring me something better. If you can’t, it’s out for bids. I feel your pain but the Crown can’t be your insurance company. Next.”

Something catches my eye in the visitors gallery. It’s Blueblood leaving.

There are a couple of more routine contracts and it’s over until thirteen hundred hours.

We head for Luna’s office and she is waiting.

“John Sampson, dost thou understand that strange contract?”

“I believe I do. I’ll bet good money that AJ recently got an incredibly good offer for apples delivered to the company with that contract renewal. Had I approved it, I would have been later revealed as having taken graft money from the supplier. The cost of raw fruit simply isn't that big a factor in the total price. Did you notice Blueblood leave the gallery when that was over?”

Spike wakes up, “I thought it was boring then you tell me we got attacked and I missed it?”

“Yes, Spike. Blueblood changed from simple assassination to character assassination. Don’t worry. It isn’t over.”

“Hast anypony objection to lunch in mine kitchen?”

That got a chorus of ‘no’s.

Thirteen hundred hours and I’m back in the big chair when the doors swing open and the next case walks in. It’s a real estate boundary dispute. A river is the boundary and it has done what rivers inevitably do, move. Now both sides claim what it moved across.

To the first party, “What does your deed show?” Swift brings it. Yep, all land to the edge of the river.

To the second party, “What does your deed show?” Swift brings it. Yep, same thing to the other edge of the river.

Got a map? Yep. And we spread it out. It shows a nice, normal river meandering across the countryside and two oxbow lakes. One lake is old and the other is what brought us here today. There is a nice house with dock and other facilities on the land now within the oxbow. It’s no longer accessible to the builder and the new owner of the land is positively ecstatic at what he considers a gift from the gods.

So, “First, let us state some absolutes. The land belongs to the owner of the rest of the land on that side of the river. Both deeds clearly state so. Everything on the land belongs to the pony that paid for it or built it, the former owner of the land.

“Does the owner of the house care to sell it and if so, for how much?”

I could buy a nice multi-story in the noble sector of Canterlot for that price. It doesn’t matter anyway. The new landowner says he doesn’t have to pay for it. It’s on his land and if it isn’t moved, it’s his.

“You are both greedy and stubborn. The house owner has ninety days to remove any and everything he wants from the land except dirt. The land owner will allow free and unrestricted access. At the end of the ninety days the house owner may sell what is left or burn it at his discretion. There will be no restrictions on methods of removal save that the land must not be damaged.

“I would have thought something sensible might have been worked out like listing it with an agent in Canterlot for rental and splitting the money but I’m not going to be back here next year to listen to you two sniveling about who made the most money. Any final statements?”

They both look dumbfounded.

“Let it be recorded and done. Anypony else?”

There isn’t. I stretch and pace for a few minutes then, “Court is ended. Let’s go home.”

We went back to Luna’s office. Still no news on Twilight.

Luna is amused, “That be a most entertaining show, John Sampson. How will thou answer if they appeal to Celestia?”

“I expect them to, or to just come back to me. They have ninety days to contemplate destroying a major asset or getting along well enough to profit nicely from it. What do you think they will do?”

Luna and Swift are laughing now.

“Spike, could you send another of those letters?”

“Sure, but I don’t know what I could say different.”

“I’m going to write it.”

I do and sign it. Spike burns it and we wait.

‘pop’ Twilight is here. I grab her and wrap her up.

“Dammit, Twilight, don’t ever do that to me again.”

“Why do you want me? You have Celestia.”

“Did you read that letter Spike sent you? And, by the way, dumping on Spike is not cool.”

“You’re Herd Stallion and she’s Herd Mare. That makes you her stallion.”

“Do you remember that ‘sold my soul’ moment? This is what was meant. I restated it yesterday morning ‘no matter what the world sees or believes, my mares are protected. That is absolute and includes Twilight’. Celestia wants me as the foundation of her great new herd. I told her she could have me for that purpose as long those I love were kept safe and with me. You were specifically named so she would understand that she doesn’t control you.”

“What about Celestia. Is she one of your mares?”

“She’s part of the herd, so, yes. When she asks, I will cover her. But that only lasts as long as she keeps my band safe. That’s the herd mare’s duty.”

“Am I part of your band?”

“I just said so, didn’t I? I named you to be sure there was no confusion.”

The wings came out again. We rubbed cheeks and shared breath for a minute.

“Twilight, this is the part of me that Celestia doesn’t have. You do. The price is sharing the other part of me. Can you live with that?”

I have some explaining to do, “Twilight, I’m sorry I made some silly assumptions. I know that Celestia owns a condo in your head. I’ve told her to her face that I’m going to evict her. Where I was stupid was assuming that it was anywhere near done. You are mine until you say different. The old conditions of keeping a distance are gone. What I need to do is communicate more. You are growing up and coming into guiding your own affairs. I can’t give you the heart, yet. But that is one of the big reasons I dance with Celestia. She is the one that could make it possible.”

Swift contributes, “Twilight, I’m just beginning to glimpse some of the things John does. I don’t understand the whole of them at all. But I’m the first pony he met and his first mare and I know that every single thing he has done has made things better for us. I trust him completely and without limit. I felt his oath to me and his oath to AJ. That’s why I could invite him to go play with an Alicorn knowing full well that she could do things for him that no Earth pony could match. It’s his fate to roam far and wide but he always comes home. And that oath when he sold his soul, that was for you. He could walk away from everything Royal and live happy with me and AJ on the farm. The deal with Celestia is for you.”

Luna was somber, “Listen to friend Swift, Twilight. There be much wisdom in what she says. Celestia hath been in pursuit of stallion John from the very beginning. Yet John chose you. There be much meaning in that.”

She has me wrapped up tight. I don’t know if I could get out without breaking something. Little sobs and tremors are running through her as she processes what she is being told.

“Twilight, darling, do you have any questions?”

She is shaking but gaining coherence. Whispering in my ear, “Why, John, why would you possibly prefer me over Celestia.”

“It’s a complicated story, Twilight. Can I tell it after we get comfortable at home?”

Luna cut in, “Tell her, John. Surely thy knows it’s no surprise to me.”

With a nod to Luna, “Twilight, Celestia is a magnificent Goddess with great strength and wisdom. She is exactly the mare I want to head my herd and keep my band safe. But she is a matron, she has already reached her peak and has nowhere left to go. Why do you think you are the Element Bearer? And Twilight, as a freshly Ascended Alicorn, barely out of foalhood, with maybe ten percent of the power you will eventually have, you are her equal. You are the future, Twilight, the mare I want my foals out of.

“And I’m not Celestia’s herd stallion because I want to add another Alicorn tail to my collection, I’m Herd Stallion because I’m the strongest trustworthy candidate and she needs the help. I’m willing to do whatever the job requires including accepting Celestia as one of my mares and siring foals out of her because it’s the way to make Equestria a safe and prosperous place for the ponies that I love. My dream is to live long enough to be your Herd Stallion some day.

“Twilight, let go of me. Luna needs us.”

Luna is just standing there with her head down and tears streaming. Twilight opens her wings and I shift her to my right arm. Moving to Luna, I lift her with my left arm and hold her to me as Twilight wraps her wings around both of us. Luna is resting her chin on my shoulder quietly crying.

Looking at Spike and Swift, “This never leaves this room. Ever!”

After a while Luna whispers in my ear, “Thank you, John. This be the reason thou must be Herd Stallion. No other in Equestria could look upon a Goddess crying and think of nothing but to comfort her. Thou may release me.”

Twilight opens her wing and I set Luna delicately on the floor. Swift quickly lends a shoulder to brace Luna.

Luna smiles weakly at Swift, “Friend Swift, truly thy induction into the Royal mystique proceeds apace.”

Swift smiles back, “Mystique be damned. When a friend needs . . .”

Luna is stronger now, “Be careful, friend Swift, thou art becoming John Sampson.”

I have a thought, “Luna, would you like some company tonight? Any or all of us?”

“John, thou art overdue for conference with Celestia about today’s Court. Twilight be in sore need of rest and Spike would best attend her. I would welcome some conversation with friend Swift whilst thou be closeted with Celestia.”

Celestia is in her favorite office, “Well, John, I was wondering if you had forgotten me.”

“I was handling a tricky eviction proceeding and lost track of time. What would you like to know?”

“Why didn’t you renew the contract for trail rations?”

“Because it is a trap by Blueblood. The numbers and explanations simply didn’t line up. If I had renewed it he would have later announced that AJ was the one getting the extra more than double bits on the contract. He will be back to complain and challenge my action and authority. It’s a win-win for him. If I accept the contract, I am guilty of graft. If I deny it, I am guilty of favoritism or prejudice. Either way, he gets to challenge me as an alien usurper.”

“He has already challenged your decision. I will hear his appeal in the morning. What details can you tell me?”

“The first thing that caught my attention was a more than doubling of the price. When I asked for an explanation, I was told that blight had hit their orchard and they had to buy fruit from an outside source. The cost of the raw fruit is a very small part of the total to make a food. They would have to pay twenty times the market price to run their costs up that much. I suggested seeking a better source for the fruit or subcontracting this season’s production to allow their farm to recover. I offered a smaller but unspecified increase to help them through their difficulty and gave them a thirty day extension to look for solutions. When they failed to even inquire about the details it confirmed to me that it was a planned trap. Blueblood left the visitors gallery just in time to meet the contractor in the hall.

“We need to know how they picked this day and who AJ has been approached by.”

Celestia suggests, “You can borrow Luna’s chariot later and go get AJ. Now let’s see if we can find out who signed him in.”

It turns out our contractor is a regular visitor. He signed up for my Court as soon as he saw it posted and declined a chance to be heard on the same day he signed up. The Guardpony that signed him in is on the witness list for tomorrow. I’m on my way to get AJ.

First I have to see Luna and arrange transportation. I’m in luck, everypony is still in Luna’s office talking.

“Hey Spike, I want you to know that I always keep my promises. You’re on the witness list for tomorrow morning’s Court. So are you, Swift. Blueblood has made a complaint about my handling of the trail ration contract. Twilight, are you up for a teleport to pick up AJ?”

Luna jumps in, “I am able.”

“What about the moon? I don’t know how long it will take to locate the record we need and I wouldn’t want you to miss that appointment. How long do we have, anyway?”

“There be around an hour to go. I can perform my duty wheresoever I may be or teleport back.”

“Let’s go.”

“Picture thy desire.”

I do and lean over to make it easy for her to reach and we are there in front of the Apple homestead.

“Hello AJ,” as I head for the door. They are all seated at the table enjoying a formerly quiet dinner. Oops. Then Luna walks in behind me. Granny shoots up behind the table.

“Be welcome at our humble table, Your Majesty.” and she bows. AJ and Big Mac are about a second behind her.

Luna replies, “I be grateful for thou fine offer but our business will not permit us to tarry.”

I step in, “AJ, have you recently taken a contract for emergency delivery at an extreme price?”

AJ looks startled, “We just shipped them out today. I wouldn’t even have sold them normally but they offered such great price for rush service.”

“AJ, that was Blueblood trying to trap me on graft charges. We hold Court on it in the morning. I need every record and detail you have and I need you for a witness in the morning.”

“Do you have the Royal train waiting?” AJ wondered.

“That’s our ‘ride’ standing behind me and we need to get back quickly so Luna can raise the moon.”

“Oh. The papers are all on my desk. I haven’t had a chance to file them.”

AJ sorts through her papers and puts several into a saddle bag. Throwing it on, “I’m ready.”

As we pass back through the kitchen, Bloom finally overcomes her awe, “Are you really going to ride a Princess all the way to Canterlot?”

I couldn’t leave that one, “Yes we are. Wanna watch?”

Bloom shoots out of her seat and after us. We step out to the middle of the front yard, stand side by side and ‘pop’ we are in Luna’s office.

“John Sampson, thou be incorrigible.”

AJ scowls at me, “You know, Granny is going to get you for that.”

Everypony else is gone but a large bowl of fruit is sitting on her desk. I tossed AJ an apple and keep one for myself as a third floats to Luna.

I suggest, “Luna, can we follow you to the balcony and come back down with Celestia when you are done?”

“Certainly. Methinks Celestia would prefer it that way.”

We reduce the fruit bowl for a while then it is time to go up to the balcony. AJ watches quietly then we thank Luna and go to plan the morning’s Court with Celestia.

“AJ, tell us what happened with this order in detail.”

“Yesterday afternoon a Unicorn walked up to the farm house and asked for me. She said she had a company that made rations for the Guard and their stock of apples had been ruined by accident. They had a deadline to meet and didn’t want to let the Guard down so she wanted to buy apples to replace the lost stock if we could ship them immediately. She offered a bonus if we could ship within twenty four hours. I said that premium shipping covered it. We finished the papers and left together for town. When I went into the shipping office to arrange for wagons in the morning, she went on and I never saw her again. When I got back to the farm this check was on my desk.”

AJ pulled a check from her bag and passed it to me. Yep, it was about the difference in the contract price. I passed it to Celestia.

I look at AJ, “That is the very same amount that they needed to add to their contract that I was supposed to approve in Court this morning. We both turned them down so we avoided that trap but now they will say one of us demanded the money and I turned them down in Court because they didn’t pay fast enough or used a check. You will have to testify and it is a safe bet that somepony will claim you asked for that amount, maybe even that you bragged I would kill their contract if they didn’t pay. They may also say that we are mistreating them because I hate blue ponies or something equally absurd.”

AJ is livid, “Do you think they are foolish enough to accuse me of lying? How absurd can they get?”

“AJ, you are my mare. They will claim that disqualifies you from testifying about me. It would if you weren’t the Element Bearer. When you say that, they will start shouting ‘Royal Privilege’. Celestia, do think it would help to bring Shining in to examine me?”

“He will be here, John. I have asked Cadance to preside to remove any trace of favoritism for my own stallion. But I fear they will try to tar the entire Royal Herd with the same brush. There are already stories circulating in town of your strange alien way of bedazzling ponies.”

“I really hope they use that one. We can call Doctor Red in to testify about my health as a stallion. That might be a good idea anyway as soon as they use the ‘alien’ word. The definition of ‘species’ for most purposes is ‘able to reproduce successfully’.”

Celestia is thoughtful, “John, do you really want to make this a Royal issue? Once that bucket of worms is spilled they will explore every single part of your life looking for something that will squick the average pony.”

“I hope they do. I have nothing to be ashamed of and we could put this scarecrow in its grave permanently.”

Celestia is still worried, “It could go on for days and drag everypony you care about in to it with you.”

“Celestia, if they insult my band or herd beyond a minor level, I will stand up and call it a stallion challenge. One way or the other, it will end there.”

AJ was seriously worried now, “Are you sure that is wise, John?”

“AJ, if he accepts it is their plan from the beginning and we might as well get it over with. If he tries to paint me as unstable I will launch into my main theme as the protector of my herd. Celestia, how would most mares feel about having great strong meat eating stallion devoted to protecting them and their foals?”

Celestia laughs, “You know how that will work. Half the tails in the room will go straight up.”

We kick ideas back and forth for a while then AJ and I head for the tower to get a good night’s rest. There was much hugging and happy greeting when we walk in the door.

But Twilight isn’t entirely happy. She takes me off for a private moment, “I’m sorry, John. I should have been there. I could have stopped them.”

“No you couldn’t. Their plan allowed for that. It’s better this way. It’s pure stallion challenge now and we’ve got that covered. And Twilight, did you fully understand what was going on with Luna?”

“I’m not sure, John.”

“Think about this. Luna and Celestia are the same age effectively. Celestia has recently, in Alicorn terms, passed her peak and begun to feel the years. Luna is feeling the same thing happening to her and some day you will feel it too. Even though the body renews itself, the rest of the universe is doing more than just maintaining, it is growing. Just as you are going to surpass Celestia, some day your foals will leave you behind. And Luna’s loss is compounded by missing her thousand best years.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Eightteen )

The feathers seem especially sweet this morning but that little voice is still there and can’t be denied, “Zero four hundred, John.”

Slide off the pad, stagger to the toilet, bounce to the kitchen, find tea, begin awareness.

“Good morning, Spike. Are you ready to witness mortal combat political style?”

“You and Twilight are going to be there so I must but it seems kinda strange to me.”

“The Blueblood coalition was getting right wealthy off Celestia’s bits. They think that being born noble entitles them to put a hand in the Royal Treasury. Then I came along and cut them off. As long as I’m here they’ll have to work for a living. The only way they can understand this is that I want the money, 'their money', for myself so they are defending themselves by destroying me. Make sense now?”

“No, but I can see the logic in it.”

“Spike, when their attack on me fails, they will attack my band next. That includes you Spike. If you are asked questions, always tell the absolute truth. Do not worry about how it makes me or Twilight look. We will take care of untwisting their lies and half truths.”

“I trust you, John. You have always treated me like a pony.”

“Do you think it will really get that bad?” Swift asks as she walks in.

“I know it will because I’m not going to let them back out of anything. When they realize just what they’ve got themselves into, they will get desperate.”

Twilight joins the tea circle and we plot our course for the day. We’ll have our normal informal breakfast then back here to change and on to the Throne Room.

The cafeteria is packed. I mean standing room only packed and about half of them have on full dress. There is one large table with empty seats and Steel is there. I tell Swift to get me eggs and oatmeal while I talk to Steel.

“Steel, what the flying fuck are you up to here?”

Steel calmly replies, “I’ve been ordered to report for morning Court to possibly testify. You’re on your own with everypony else. I suspect some of them are friends of yours. There was excitement after the notice for today’s Court was posted. Others may be friends of Swift. I do know that none of them are on duty.”

“Dammit, Prince John wishes the Guard would keep their collective noses out of Royal affairs. John Sampson is tickled shitless and hopes certain noble houses take the hint.”

We eat and head back to dress. I consider for a bit then put on my small sword.

In the Throne Room there were nine chairs in a row, in colors and with marks. The entire Royal Herd is represented in the same order as on my big sword. Shining, AJ, Swift, and Spike are set back and flanking their relatives. But first there is a meeting in the conference room behind Celestia’s office.

Celestia is presiding, “Are there any questions?”

Cadance has one, “Why are we going to such extremes for a minor contract dispute?”

I take that one, “These are the ponies that were robbing Celestia blind until I uncovered their tricks. I cost them millions of bits. The very same ponies hired the assassins at the Spring Fling. They may turn this into a stallion challenge or just try to discredit me enough to get their graft back. My vote is for punishing them enough to keep them quiet for a couple of generations.”

Celestia adds, “They are degenerated Noble Herds that believe an accident of birth entitles them to a free ride on the Royal Treasury. I’ve been trying to get them off my back for decades.”

Cadance expands, “So the contractor is a pawn. We’re after his boss?”

“Bingo.” “Or his boss’s boss.” Celestia and I collide.

We kick ideas around until it is time then we all take our seats and the doors open. Ponies came in . . and in . . and in. The room is packed. About a quarter of the crowd to the right is ranks of Guard. And you can spot the Blueblood followers, they’re the ones looking at the Guard and moving left. It takes forty five minutes to get as many ponies packed in as possible and what I can see of the hall is just as packed.

There’s no sign of our contractor so we hear some other ponies that were originally scheduled before the complaint was filed. It’s routine and boring until my real estate case from yesterday shows up and they specifically want me to hear them.

“Your Majesty, when we left your Court yesterday, we were mad. You had treated us like children and ordered the destruction of valuable property. We were so mad at you, we forgot to be mad at each other for a little while. We ate dinner together and talked. And we realized how smart that idea of making rental camp out of it is. Not only that, we figured out why you treated us like you did. So now we want to drop our case and use that rental idea.”

I look over, “Does the Recorder have the number and details of their case from yesterday?” I get a nod.

“The Order is amended to reflect that nothing will be changed on or about the property. A professional agent will be employed to manage the property, maintain it, and collect rents. Every quarter the agent will divide the net profits among the two owners and the agent. Are there any questions or changes?”

They look at each other then back to me and nod.

“Let the record reflect that both parties indicated assent. Let it be recorded and done.

“And thank you two. I predicted this outcome to Princess Luna last night and you make me look good.”

That shocked them but the house loved it.

We still don’t have our contractor and we are out of other cases. Celestia looks ready to bail when a Guardpony rushes in and up to her. She listens for a minute then sends him down the row to me. A body has been found that fits the description of our contractor. Could I come and confirm the identity? I glance at Celestia and she nods. I tell Swift what is going on and to pass the info up the line quietly.

The Guardpony leads me out the main gate and several hundred yards down the road. In a small side alley behind some boxes is our contractor minus most of his blood. He was found because it is running down the alley from a gaping throat wound. My guess would be a guaranteed no noise kind of killing.

I tell the Guard officer in charge that it is him and how important this investigation is to me and Celestia. Then I sprint back to the Throne Room.

I nod to Celestia as I walk in the door.

Celestia stands and, “This Court is ended.” And she is out the back door with all of us close behind her.

I’m back in the familiar conference room reporting, “It is definitely him and definitely no accident. His throat and both arteries were severed with one clean slice. Nothing is missing and he’s just a few hundred yards from the main gate. My money is on somepony not liking what they see when they get here and deciding to cut their losses.”

There are lots of agreements with that.

Then I have a thought, “AJ, where’s the paperwork on that apple shipment? It takes a substantial facility to process that many apples and substantial money to run it. There has to be a name on all of that. And we may find more info about their ‘emergency’.”

AJ has the papers and the final delivery is by rail to Baltimare. Why are bells going off in my head? Oh,yeah!

“Mares and Stallions your attention please! I know that address. We can get copies of my analysis of the first grant request that I did to start this off but it’s going to show that address as one of the empty buildings that couldn’t be used by the crew building the new railroad. It’s a big shell next to the existing rail line and it’s listed as a ‘warehouse with light utilities’. Even if they move in the equipment, you can’t support a commercial kitchen on ‘light utilities’. It’s locally owned but Blueblood’s herd holds the lease.”

AJ is looking disturbed, “You mean they are just dumping my apples on the floor in an empty building?”

“Probably, yes. Have they paid for them yet?”

Now she’s really mad, “It hasn’t cleared the bank yet.”

Celestia orders, “John, you have the authority. Go to the bank and trace the money. AJ has earned it and we need to know who is paying it.”

Our little war council broke up then but I had more on my mind.

“Shining, we need to talk privately. I have some interesting ideas for you.”

We detour into an empty room on Ambassador’s Row. I close my eyes and shift into man-x.

When I open my eyes, “I have four bodies now. Two human and two equine. This is the second human. I’m making small changes in it to make it battle ready. That’s the fun part. I can edit now. How do you like the eyes?”

“John, there are days you are just plain scary. Do they work as well as you hoped?

“Better. I need to practice with them because the depth perception is different. But what I’m after today is for my pony body. My original equine self is really Fred light. It’s all horse, not pony. I want to edit it enough to make a usable pony. As a horse I have full access to my magic and can do all the normal pony things, except talk. I need to talk. I tried using my human vocal cords and they work but I still can’t talk. The sound comes out my nose unmodulated by my mouth. I need a pony face. I need all the throat and tongue parts that make speech sounds. Ideally, I need a pony head to copy parts off of until I can get a voice.

“How do I fit into this?”

“I need a Unicorn to get anything into my head. And I want a stallion model so I don’t sound silly. That leaves you or Steel as the only two I would trust in my head. You’ve already been there so the risks are known for you. What it comes down to is can I please use your head as a model and would you put the pattern where I can get to it? I thought of just copying a pony body like I did Fred’s but I don’t want to walk around as a counterfeit anypony. I want to build a unique me and I need help to do it.”

“This is a new idea to me. I don’t mind helping you and I trust you but I’m not sure I can do it.

“Well think on this, I don’t mind showing you anything I’m doing. If you learn how, it’s possible we could trade parts. You could take my horse body for a spin. I have no idea if you can use magic the way I do but I’m very sure it’s worth a try. We need to do it near here so help can be summoned if needed. We need some privacy and time. And I need to get this damned Blueblood problem from hanging over us.”

“We’re going to be here for a few days and staying with Twilight so we’ll have opportunities. And congratulations on the promotion. I hope it gets you what you want.”

“Thanks. It ‘disturbed’ Twilight but I think we’re back on course. You need to see my new sword. I may even wear it to talk to the bankers. It has a way of enforcing attention. Let’s go to the tower so I can show you.”

When we walk in the door, I unbuckle my small sword and put it on the rack. Then I put on the big one and model it for Shining.

“This is my Baby. I just like the way it feels.”

“Can you actually draw that?”

“Of course. In fact, one of the main reasons I want the eyes is so I can draw it without endangering friends.”

I step off and dial up my strength a little. A few passes later, “What do you think?”

“I think you are damned scary with that monster. Ten of you could clear a battlefield.”

“That is inherent in my little plot. You could be holy terror number two.”

“What are my silly stallions doing playing with weapons in the home?” Cadance has noticed that we are in.

“I’m just showing Shining my new favorite toy.”

We go up to the library to greet the band. There is a basic law of pony behavior, the time required to greet and welcome increases as the square of the number of ponies involved. It is one of the sweeter parts of being a pony.

We plan and consider and decide. Lunch at Smoky’s for everypony then Swift, Shining, and I will go to the bank. If we weren’t out of the bank in twenty minutes, Cadance, Twilight, AJ, and Spike will follow and we will create a Royal Scene in the bank.

We just get a whole pot of stew and bowls then go nuts on it sitting right in front of the window. A crowd gathers outside to watch the Royal Herd eating at Smoky’s.

Smoky comes by to say hello, “Your Majesty. You can’t know how good it makes me feel to say that, Prince John. Finally, we have Royal Earth ponies. There are so many of us that look at you and feel like we are finally full blooded ponies. And then you come here just like the rest of us. I want to thank you for just being you.”

“Smoky, I don’t know how to be anypony but me. You’d laugh yourself silly if you knew how often I screw up being a high level pony.”

“You save those stories for somepony that believes them, Your Majesty. I see the evidence all around you. I knew you were special the first day you came in here.”

Twilight is looking at me like I just grew three horns but we don’t have time right now. Swift and Spike confer and confirm the location of the bank. I have the invoice and draft info in my pocket. Shining, Swift, and I set off.

“Shining, if we get stuck long enough to need the mares, let me greet them first. I want to bitchslap the bankers with the whole alien Herd Stallion scenario. Don’t be surprised if I go for some arousing displays of affection. I want to bait them as much as we can. You and Swift look around and watch for emotional reactions. That was the first tip off with Blueblood.”

Swift enters the bank first and the greeter starts her way with a smile. Then I step in and the smile freezes as the greeter turns to a colleague. Shining walks in behind me and the greeter makes a beeline for him.

“Prince Shining Armor, I’m so glad to see you. What brings you here today.”

Shining looks at her completely deadpan, “I’m just having lunch with His Majesty today and came along for the walk.”

The greeter was bubbly now, “Oh? We have more Royalty coming?”

Shining is enjoying himself, “Yes, but He’s already here. He’s the tall stallion standing right over there.”

A very disturbed greeter comes over to me, “Could you please identify yourself, sir?”

Swift grabs this one, “You are addressing His Highness John Sampson, Herd Stallion and Co-ruler to Princess Celestia.”

The greeter swallows her shit sandwich and, “Forgive me Your Majesty. We were not notified.”

My turn, “You recognized Prince Shining Armor. Verify his identity.”

The greeter is back to bubbly, “There’s no need for that. We all know the Prince.”

I lean over her a bit, “That was not a suggestion.”

So they brought out a big binder and flipped through the pages until they find Shining’s Cutie mark and it matches.

I speak again, “Prince Shining, please state my full name and rank.”

Shining is grinning, “His Majesty Major John Sampson Royal Herd Stallion.”

I pull my pants down enough to expose my cutie mark and look directly at the greeter, “Record it.”

The greeter motions and a clerk comes rushing over with a pad and colored pencils. I stand there while she sketches.

I pull a note out of my pocket and hand to the greeter, “Get me all available information on this account including a history from the last year.”

The greeter rushes to a back office and disappears for a while. By the time she is back the sketch is done and I am officially identified with the bank.

“I’m sorry, sir, but there is no such account.”

That annoys me. I take another note out of my pocket and hand it to the greeter, “Very well. I need the same information on this account.”

And I get the same result. So, “I need to see the president of this bank immediately.”

“I’m sorry, sir. Prince Blueblood is out of town.”

“Bring me the vice president.”

“Stuffed Shirt is out of town too.”

“Send a notification to the Castle when they return. Shining, Swift, let’s quit wasting time.”

I want to be out before the mares arrive. The second account I inquired about is AJ’s farm account.

We met the mares about three blocks up. Doubling back, we locate a small bakery and push two tables together outside.

“Twilight, I want you to take AJ to Ponyville near the bank branch. Don’t let them see you from the bank and don’t go in. AJ, I want you to withdraw a hundred bits from my Guard account and deposit it in your farm account. Be sure it’s the same account the payment for the apples is going into. Fill everything out just right and get receipts. Then bring it all back here. If anypony says there is no such account or gives any reason for the transaction to fail, do not argue. Just smile and return here. Got it?”

They both nod, step out to the center of the patio, and disappear.

Cadance and Shining both turn on me. I explain, “They denied there was any such account as the one they paid for the apples with so I tried the other direction. The second account I asked about was the farm account AJ deposited their payment into. They said there was no such account as that either. If they lied to a direct question from a Royal on official business, we can raid the bank and seize all of their records. If they killed the accounts, including the account of a Royal Herd Member, they embezzled from a Royal and we can raid the bank and seize their records. I don’t want to tip them off if we can avoid it. I want a Company of Guard to descend on them like vengeance personified and keep the records from being ‘damaged’.

Spike had been taking all of this in, “Cool. I want to watch.”

In a few minutes Twilight and AJ reappeared. AJ walked somberly up to me and gave me one hundred bits.

“They said there was no such account as my farm account by number or by name.”

“How much was in it, AJ?”

“Counting the deposit for the apples, about three hundred and twenty thousand bits.”

“Twilight, take AJ and Spike. Cadance, take me, Shining, and Swift. Let’s all meet in Celestia’s conference room. ‘pop’ And we are there.

I open the door to very surprised Guardpony, “Get Celestia, Luna, Colonel Steel, and the Royal Treasurer here in three minutes.”

Celestia pops in while I am speaking, “What’s going on, John?”

“Blueblood’s bank just embezzled three hundred thousand bits from a Royal Herd Member as part of lying to a Royal Investigator to conceal evidence in a murder investigation. I think that entitles us to seize and examine his bank records.”

Luna pops in as I am taking a breath so I have to say it again.

Steel is there in a few minutes and the Treasurer right on his heels. I tell the whole story in gruesome detail this time.

Celestia asks Shining, “Anything to add?”

Shining replies, “John told me to watch for emotional reactions while he gave them cause. Everypony in that bank wants to kill him. Some of them reached in drawers when his back was turned. He said he wanted to go back in with a Company and I agree with him.”

Celestia looks at Swift, “How about you?”

Swift replies, “What he said, exactly.”

Steel’s turn, “When three experienced officers agree, I damned well better believe them. We’ll need some major magic help too. Expect trap spells everywhere.”

Celestia turns to the poor Treasurer, “Don’t worry about the military parts. The building will be safe before you get near it. Can you run the country if they destroy all records? How hard will it be to change to another depository?”

“We have duplicate records and so do they. There are enough other banks to cover operating expenses with no more than a few days delay. A full orderly changeover will take months.”

Celestia asks, “Pros and cons?”

I said, “If we can get their records and analyze them or turn a bookkeeper, we can get their entire organization and end corruption for a generation.”

Luna says, “If they be not dragging our resources down, our ponies be much happier but can we prevent the destruction of all they hold hostage?”

Cadance says, “The Crystal Empire is insulated from any damage they do. We can help with any recovery.”

Twilight says, “We can keep ponies safe from their traps but keeping records whole will be much tougher. They will be shielded and self destructing.”

Swift says, “They think they can rob and kill with impunity. I need to do something about that.”

AJ says, “I want my money and their hide.”

Celestia reassures AJ, “I will cover all of your losses and then some in return for letting us use your account to prosecute them.”

I have one last question, “When?”

When should we hit the bank? Late at night would mean fewer ponies but more magic. In the day would be sooner and less chance they had already hidden files but there would be major resistance. In the end it turned out to be decided for us. It would take until after midnight to get enough Guardponies without completely gutting the Castle and nearly that long to round up the right Unicorns. So we go in at zero three hundred.

The strategy is set. The tactics are in motion. So we are having a late dinner in the tower. AJ has been on a non-stop boil since leaving the Ponyville bank.

I try reason, “AJ, slow down or you will burn yourself out before you get to hit one of them.”

I doesn’t work. She’s mad.

I try again, “You know they have my money too?”

She is not going to slow down until she sees them squirm.

“AJ, as a Guard officer, as your stallion, and as your friend, if you don’t start acting like you have good sense I am going to lock you in the castle until this is over.

That gets her attention, “You wouldn’t dare.”

“I would much rather have a pissed AJ than a dead AJ.”

I grab Twilight, “Twilight, help me distract AJ. We’ve got seven hours to wait and at the rate she’s going, she’ll blow a gasket before then.”

We get AJ sat down in the main room but she is too fidgety for much grooming.

Time for plan B, “Twilight, is there anything that happened today that you have any questions about?”

“As a matter of fact, there is. I want to know what Smoky was talking about.”

Great choice Twilight, “Which part of it? He covered a broad range in a few words.”

“Start with you being an Earth pony.”

“Think carefully. Do I have a horn? Nope. So I’m not a Unicorn. Do I have wings? Nope. So I can’t be a Pegasus. What’s left?”

“But you have strong magic.”

“And AJ doesn’t?”

After three false starts I have sympathy on Twilight, “What you are experiencing is the unconscious Unicorn bias. You grew up as a Unicorn in a Unicorn band among Unicorns. Unicorns are the ponies that have magic because you can’t do magic without a horn.”

“Pegasi have magic in their wings. They couldn’t fly without it.”

“Twilight, I have flown in machines larger than most buildings in Equestria. It’s a very common thing on Terra. So I know better than anypony just how much Pegasi depend on magic. But you know what really amazes me? It’s the way they can hold and manipulate things with their feathers.”

“That’s just another aspect of the magic in their wings.”

“Yes it is. But have you ever wondered what might be possible if they worked as hard as a Unicorn to train that aspect of their magic? We know that the feathers are contributing no physical strength at all so there must be some projection of magic going on.”

“I’ve never seen anything about that in my studies.”

“That’s because wings are for flying and nothing else need be known. But back to me and AJ. We don’t have wings or horns so we can’t do magic. Now go ask your brother how he feels about that. He’s a high level Unicorn and he can’t beat my magic.”

“Yes but you’re different, John.”

“And so is AJ? Because you told me that the Elements are highest level magic. Regardless, I don’t have a horn or wings but I can change bodies at will. Can you do that?”

“You are still different.”

“Okay. A Unicorn can communicate with my mind if they touch me. Fred can do it long distance. Where’s Fred’s horn? I know, Fred is different too.”

“But what does all of this have to do with Smoky anyway?”

“You have to do Alicorn level magic to be Royal. You have to start as Unicorn to get to Alicorn. So only Unicorns can be Royal. I’m not minimizing how hard you studied to get there. I’m just wondering where a Pegasus or Earth Pony could go with that level of study.”

“Pegasi have flight schools and Earth ponies study engineering.”

“And there it stops. At least Pegasi can look at you and say ‘she’s half Pegasus’. How many engineers get invited to magic school?”

“Why would an engineer want to go to magic school?”

“Yeah, that’s as silly as a Unicorn going to engineering school.”

“You’re making fun of me!”

“No, just some of the ideas you’ve been taught. Think hard on this, my Oath is to be the best possible pony that I could be. Without a horn or wings I could only be one kind of pony. So I’m the best possible Earth pony. That’s how the magic of Equestria works and you know it. If I had asked for a horn, I could have got it but I didn’t know to ask so I’m a default Earth pony. Can you find a fault with that logic?”

Twilight had to think for a while, “I don’t see anything wrong as far as it goes but why can’t you be some new kind of pony?”

“Who was compelled to use Earth pony magic like the heartbond almost immediately? That’s what Smoky was saying. The other Earth ponies feel it. Even the Pegusi recognize it. I feel like an Earth pony to them but I have no trouble competing with a Unicorn. Then I start covering Alicorns. That gives every Earth pony and Pegasus in Equestria hope. If they try hard enough, maybe they can do it too.”

“But that’s always been true.”

“I’m not the one you have to convince.”

AJ is snoring lightly so we slip off to the kitchen for some tea. Both of us can draw on magic resources so while rest would be nice, it isn’t necessary. We talk about the Royal Herd and where the future might find us for quite a while. Then it is zero two hundred. We wake AJ and pour some tea into her. I get dressed in my work uniform and small sword. And we head out to Celestia’s office for the final assembly.

I line Twilight, Swift, AJ and Spike up, “You will stay together and watch out for each other unless called for a specific purpose. I will be with you and we will all be with Celestia. The combat teams are experienced working with their teammates and strangers will just endanger them. I may get called for a breaching and Twilight may get called for magic but most likely we will go in after the building is secure and safed. AJ and Spike, do what Swift says without argument. She knows the military drill and will keep you out of trouble. Twilight, you are in charge of transportation. Let’s go find Celestia.

Celestia, Luna, Cadance, and Steel are waiting just inside the main gate. The first squad is flying out as we arrive. They are all Batponies from Luna’s Guard and will take positions in the shadows where they can watch doors and intersections all around the building. Their job is to keep civilians out and enemy in.

The second squad is an Engineers group of Earth ponies with Unicorn and Pegasus overwatch. Their job is to get the doors open as quickly as possible. When the Batponies are set Cadance and Luna will teleport them to the doors.

The third squad is Recon. When a door opens Celestia will teleport them to right in front of it and they will go through the building as fast as possible. As soon as they have cleared the building the Expert Unicorns will start checking and releasing evidence for transport to the Castle.

There are shields to prevent teleports in and out of the building and we don’t want to disable them. We will have to guard the building and contents until some resolution is reached.

Shining, Steel, and I have Princesses to protect and will stay with that unless something goes sideways.

Squad two just vanished. There is now an active assault in progress. In an amazingly short time Squad three follows them. Then we’re all in the street half a block from the building. The squads all report clear. It was too damned easy.

I caution, “Everypony watch themselves carefully. Stick to the buddy system. This is too easy.”

Steel calls me over to a door between the offices. It opens onto stairs leading down. The basement is possibly bigger than the building.

Steel says, “The horn says there’s something going on down here but I can’t find it.”

I look through every room and find nothing but old boxes of old paper and furniture that should have been thrown out. But I agree with Steel. Something is missing. Then I realize what it is, a whole quadrant of the basement isn't accessible.

I bring Twilight down, “There’s something behind this wall. I can’t find a door anywhere so there must magic hiding it or a magic method of entry. Find it.

After twenty minutes Twilight says, “I can’t see a hole anywhere. I agree with you not because I see anything but because I don’t. If there was rock or dirt there I’d know it. I see blank.”

Shining has joined us. I say, “Everypony out but Shining. I’m going to make a hole and we have no idea what’s in there. Shining get ready to catch it if it’s bad.”

I take a deep breath and concentrate. This time I go way down and bring up something big. I set myself and anchor with my hands against the wall. I push. I felt a little bit of give to the right so I move there and push again. Somepony pushed back.

“Steel!” And he comes sailing down the stairs. “I’m getting active resistance. Somepony is fighting back. That means they know we are here and don’t like it. Expect trouble.”

“Yes, sir:” And he is gone.

I wait a few seconds then move farther right which puts me near a wall. I push again but this time I add my speed. I change directions at random and my foe has to adapt. I realize there are several of them because they don’t all react at the same speed. Suddenly I twist and put my feet against the side wall and push sideways like I want to slide the wall. It works. Some blocks move and I've opened a gap. I get my hands in the gap and pull the blocks out. To the tune of much shaking and a bright flash the wall gives and opens up. I stop and stand back.

Shining is wide eyed, “I’m glad you told me to have a shield up.” He is staring at two very large stone blocks that have come out of the wall aimed right at his chest.

“Come over here and make a light.” He did and what I saw changed my view of Equestria and Blueblood.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Nineteen )

Shining is looking but not recognizing, “What is all that, John?”

“That’s the death of Equestria. Steel! Get down here Priority one!”

Steel arrives in seconds, “What is it, sir?” I just point. He looks and gasps, “That shouldn’t be possible.”

I reply, “But there it is. The three of us will box everything up and seal it. It will be sent to my office for analysis. Shining, just go with me on this. I will explain when we are in a secure place.”

I post Swift and Twilight at the head of the stairs to guard the boxes and prevent anypony at all from coming down. Steel, Shining, and I get to work. It takes a couple of hours and we even take the dust. Finally we are back in my office staring at a pile of boxes.

Shining is having a curiosity attack, “John, you can’t say something like that and leave me hanging.”

I turn to Steel, “We have to go look. You know that. Let’s take him.”

“It’s your call, John.”

So we go down the hall to my locked room. It hasn’t been touched by anypony authorized since we locked it. Steele and I produce our keys and use them. Everything is as we left it.

Shining is looking everything over, “I recognize that,” pointing to my AR. “There was something a lot like that in the bank but this is much better made. What does it do?”

I reply, “It kills Royalty. That is a fine example of the human tech that ended the rule of kings and queens on Terra hundreds of years ago. It makes any random child as strong as a squad of Unicorns.”

I explain to him how it operates and why it makes such a difference.

“But there is good news. There is no chance that anypony in Equestria can duplicate it. The level of technical skill and precision is beyond anypony but me. The bad news is that the concept can be adapted to produce less powerful but far beyond anything Equestrian weapons. We need to go over every speck of this room and see if we can find out how they got in.”

An hour later we have found nothing. We lock back up and go back to my office. My stomach is certain that breakfast is long overdue. We have enough for eight ponies brought in and I eat most of it. I’ve used some large scale magic.

“Shining, I am going to assume that you have had nothing to do with the theft because you didn’t know what was where until long after the theft. I want you to spend some time in my head and make damned sure nothing has slipped through. I stretch on a large beanbag and wait.

Shining is worried, “Are you sure you need this?”

“Yes, I want to be sure nopony has taken advantage of me without my conscious knowledge. I have nothing that I would hide from my brother Herd Stallion.”

“This could take a while.”

“You got anything better to do?”

I lean back and close my eyes. I feel the touch and images begin to flow. The experience is timeless but I am hungry again when it is over.

Shining is somber, “John, you are one scary stallion. I’m beginning to feel sorry for Blueblood. Steel, would you believe he likes the taste of Manticore. He’s eaten more than the one everypony knows about. Be very very happy he is on our side.

“He is fully committed to Equestria and the Royal Herd and there is no sign at all that he has ever been interfered with or invaded.”

I stand and stretch, “How soon before you feel up to doing it again?”

Shining thought and, “About an hour after I get something to eat.”

“I’ll meet you in the cafeteria. Order fish, potatoes, and fruit for me. I’m going to tell Celestia what’s going on.”

Celestia is mad at me until I tell her what I have been doing. She may be worse than AJ about taking it personally. They have invaded her Castle. She did have one piece of great news. Blueblood’s herd has reported an accidental magic backlash that killed three and injured two more at about the same time as I opened the wall.

Shining and Steel are pleased to hear of Blueblood’s misfortune.

Shining is looking at his food, “Damn you, John. You did this to me. I walked among your ‘demons’ to make sure nothing was hidden there but none of them bother me as much as the idea that you look at Manticores the same way Manticores look at ponies. Manticores are monsters.”

“Shining, did you look at how I see your sister?”

“No, you need some privacy.”

“We’ll have to fix that when we get back. It will give you some perspective.”

I enjoy my dinner and Shining eats most of his. When we get back to my office I get back on the big bean bag.

I look at Shining, “You said an hour. Is there something you would like to ask while dinner settles?”

Shining is back on curiosity, “I am wondering how such a small weapon has such strength.”

“That’s easy. Precise control of every component allows you to release an amazing amount of energy into a very small place in a very short time. Any of dozens of small mistakes will result in an inoperative weapon and possibly a dead operator.

“What makes it so effective is the ability to deliver that energy across hundreds of yards with relatively little loss or dissipation and great accuracy. I could stand in Blueblood’s upstairs bedroom and kill Celestia any morning I chose and it would happen so fast that she would be dead before she heard the sound it makes.

“All it takes is one single pony with a willingness to die and there is no effective defense. Your sovereign can never appear outdoors or before any group not screened in advance and thoroughly searched at the door. That’s how it ended the reign of kings and queens on Terra. No single pony could be directly responsible for anything without living in fear of the insane individual.”

“How could any government possibly function in a place like that? You’d have nothing but chaos and we know how that works out.”

“It’s not all bad. Imagine Blueblood on Celestia’s Throne. Many rulers were like that because there is no magic on Terra, especially no Magic of Friendship. At least there is a way to force reform when all else has failed. It eventually led to concepts like ‘the consent of the governed’ and ‘government by the ponies’. It also led inevitably to MAD, Mutual Assured Destruction, where nopony starts a war because nopony could survive a war. Now all you need is one small group that believes seventy two virgin mares are waiting for them after they die in battle.”

Steel is shocked, “John, surely humans can’t be that insane.”

“The problem, Steel, is that the same tech works for things other than weapons. As a farmer I could feed thousands by myself. That’s a good thing, right? But it removes ponies from the land. There are buildings on Terra with a population greater than Equestrian cities. And some of those humans go an entire lifetime without touching dirt or growing anything. How can you expect them to be sane?”

Shining said, “I’m ready. And understanding things I wish I had never heard.”

I lay back and close my eyes. The images begin and run for a few minutes then stop. Just as I open my eyes I find myself being hugged by a large Unicorn.

Shining said, “John, I heard what Swift said but never realized how literally she meant it. I’m glad you’re the one for Twilight and I hope you get your dream.”

Now it’s Steel’s turn. I give him my comfortable spot on the bean bag and go find Twilight.

“About time you colts remember the rest of the herd. What are you accomplishing locked in a room all day?”

“We are looking for the culprit in our theft, starting in our heads. Somepony got a good enough look at my weapon to try to duplicate it. The locks are undisturbed and the room looks untouched. So the possibilities are that we were compromised and the keys used or what I’m about to ask you. I know that Unicorns can ‘see’ the inside of things to some extent. What are the limits of that ‘extent’?”

“Well, John, you already know about magic and unintended outcomes. If you want to act on a given thing you have to have a complete grasp of what it is. You don’t want the water without the pitcher or vice versa. The ability to ‘see’ all of a thing is essential to handling it with magic.”

I need more, “I’ve got that and I remember the Imaging Unicorn at the doctor’s office. But what are the limits of that kind of detailed visualization? How far can you ‘see’?”

“That depends on the Unicorn and their familiarity with the object. Celestia can reach the sun and Luna the moon. Mostly it parallels your eyesight. You can ‘see’ things that you can see.”

One more step, “That makes sense. Now what about things you can’t see with your eyes like my internal organs? Or maybe something in a locked drawer?”

“Your internal organs are part of you so they’re more about detail than distance. A drawer is trickier. Any Unicorn can ‘see’ the handle and pull it. Better is to ‘see’ the drawer itself by extension and be able to lift it as you pull. Best is to ‘see’ the contents as part of the drawer and then you can even teleport it. Only the strongest Unicorns can do that.”

Almost, “Could you teleport just the contents? Or even read a paper while it’s in the drawer?”

“It’s a rare few that could read the paper but teleporting it out and back in is relatively common. That’s why the bank has such tough shields built in to it’s building and your room has wards.”

“But they would have to get close to the building even without the shields? You couldn’t sit here in my office and ‘raid’ the bank?”

“Again, it parallels eyeball sight. If I was standing in the middle of a flat field and it’s too far away for me to see and identify, it’s too far away to manipulate with magic. There’s also a lot of training and detailed visualization needed to be able to see through multiple walls. It would take a lot of time to build the image.

“That tells me a lot. By locking the room and never touching anything, we may have been our own worst enemy. When Shining is done with Steel, one of them is going to have to do the same with you and Swift. I’m sorry but it has to be one of the few of us that already have knowledge of my tech. How do you feel about it? I guess I should tell you that I have already invited Shining to tour our relationship from my side and he has approved of me.”

“John, I don’t need his approval. I guess I would rather it be Shining but I don’t know if he’ll be willing. He’s always been the bashful one in the herd.”

“I didn’t do it for his approval. He had developed a slightly lopsided view after looking through my memories so I insisted that he see something I’m proud of. You might want to be careful bringing up food around him for a little while.”

“John, there is another option. You could do it. I trust you more than anypony else.”

“I don’t have a horn so I’m guessing that you will use yours to let me in. But I don’t have any training or experience. How badly could I screw up? Could I hurt you?”

“You’ve answered half of your own question. Remember how much of magic is intent? And you don’t even ask if you could hurt yourself. That’s why I trust you. I’m beginning to understand what makes you tick. I could train you right now then turn control over to you. That’s how it’s normally done. The only thing different is you not having a horn of your own. Some of what you see will be strange because you’ve never had a Unicorn point of view. You will certainly have a better answer to your earlier question.”

“Twilight, I’m liking the way you’re learning too. You’re giving me confidence in your judgment. I want to let you see some things I do but I have to have absolute certainty that I will remain in control. There are some things in my head that you never want to see. Shining is no shrinking violet but he came out of there with the wobbles.”

“I know you, John. I don’t worry about anything you’ve done. I know who you are now.”

“Twilight, in our little raid on that bank I killed three Unicorns and crippled two. I enjoyed doing it because they were part of a threat to those I love. In the near future I will probably do it a lot more. I lived in the Everfree among the monsters by being a monster’s monster. That’s what disturbed your brother. He found out I like eating monsters. I want to be that sweet loving stallion you know but when anypony I love is threatened the monster can come out and play. You need to know about that monster, Twilight, because he is a perfectly normal human and he will always be a part of me. I just don’t want to scare you away before you’ve had a chance to get to know him.”

“I don’t understand why you are telling me this right now.”

“Because if you walk in my mind you will meet him. He’s the one that keeps the demons in the basement. And he’s the one that does whatever it takes to keep others safe. You will need him if you want to rule a safe and prosperous Equestria. Do you still want to let a monster into your head?”

“I trust you, John. If he’s part of you, I trust him.”

“How do you want to do this? Do we have to maintain the touch all through it?”

“We have to maintain some kind of contact and the horn is best. Normally you would be in full control and could stand or lay as suits you. For training it would be better if we both lay face to face. We can just touch at the head or you could hold me. I think I like the holding better.”

We got comfortable on the bedroom pad in what was essentially a permanent kiss and I closed my eyes. The images come but they are different. They are not only different images but the organization is different. Then I see the floor. I want to be there and I am. Twilight is standing next to me.

“Very good, John. Some Unicorns don’t get this far on their first day.”

The images are swirling across the horizon in front of me. Each is a small picture of an event. When I turn they were all around me.

“Now, John, choose a subject and make it your desire.”

Let’s start with something safe, food. I thought about food. Not much happened. So I wanted to see food and the images swirled wildly. Way too many to count. Okay, I want to see apples working from today back. And there they were, stable and arrayed in order right in front of me.

“Now I really want to see in your mind. That is amazing focus.”

“Twilight, it seems rather disorganized to me. I have to tell it how to order itself.”

“John, learning to keep your mind organized and focused is the toughest part of Unicorn training. If you don’t keep it that way your magic can get random and dangerous. Are you telling me that you’re more organized than me?”

“Way more organized. Remember the cutie mark? Organizing information is what I do.”

“I’ll bet that explains the other strange thing about you. Let’s see if you can open one. Pick whatever interests you and see if you can look inside it.”

I pick one that seems recent and bright and I pull it toward me. When it is right in front of me I wish it bigger and it grows to giant size. I push the time forward and watch an apple float out of the bowl and stop right in front of my mouth. Then I take a bite. For fun I run it backward and unbite the apple.”

“John, what are you doing?”

“I’m watching you eat an apple.”

“Can you taste it?”

“No, I’m just watching it and running the time backwards for fun.”

“John, I can’t do that.”

“Hm. Nopony told me I couldn’t so I just treated it like Terran tech and it worked.”

“We will have to see if you can teach me that later. Right now, see if you can enter the memory. You should be able to touch it and experience it fully.”

I step into it and become Twilight. The pony sensations are slightly different but I am used to them. The wings are a new twist. But the big difference is how everything looks. When I look at the bowl it opens to reveal all of the fruit in it. I select an apple and see it’s whole being. I will it to rise out of the bowl and come toward me. I stop it in front of me then I reach out and take a bite. It is sweet and juicy as I chew. I separate myself from Twilight and step back.

“Damned. That is intense. I see what you mean about the magic.”

“You’ve surprised me again. Most rookies need help separating their identity from a memory once they have fully joined it for the first time. Let’s get the final rookie moment out of the way. Just follow me.”

The images flash by until they settle on our bedroom. I’m looking at myself sleeping with my band around me.

“Step into it, John. Experience it and don’t come out until it is done.”

I step in and it hits me like a hammer. That’s my stallion on the pad and I want him right now. I quietly wake the ponies around him and they all understand. They make way for me as I touch him, caressing his magnificence. My tail is over my back now and I feel myself twitching and dripping. I’m ready for him but he isn’t ready for me yet. . . . .

I stay with it until we are satisfied. It was very interesting. I learned some small things from the physical feelings but the big revelation was emotional. The goddess sees me as her god. And she lusts after my strength. That’s what turns Alicorns on, a stallion with strength.

“That is very interesting, Twilight. Now I really need to show you some of my memories. The parallels are amazing.”

“That’s the lesson, John. We are all mostly the same on the inside. Though you may have broken the mold. It’s proverbial that stallions always go for the sex first and get caught up in it. I’m sure you’re ready to solo now. Look around. You’ve already experienced my most intimate moment so there’s nothing left to hide. When you’re done just step out the way you came in. If you have any trouble call me. I can’t be far.”

I start with retrieving my gear and fast forward from there. There is nothing even slightly suspicious but I learn a lot about how to be a Unicorn. I save some of those memories for later reference. My favorite part is cuddling with my wings wrapped around my band.

The wings distract me so I look for flying. Oh my. I save more of this. I have got to get some wings. But I’m starting to feel discomfort so I go back to the main floor. I look around and everything looks happy so I want to be back in my own head and I am.

“Wake up Twilight. I hope you don’t need a toilet as bad as I do.”

Then I look around and see Shining and Steel snoozing on chairs they’ve brought in. I ease off the pad and head for the toilet. There’s a small noise in the kitchen. After the toilet, I look and it’s Swift making tea.

I ask, “What time is it?”

“It’s zero four hundred. Welcome back to the world.”

I head back to the bedroom and find everypony still asleep. I kiss Twilight full bore and her eyes pop open.

“Good Morning. The toilet awaits.”

She blinks and slides off in route.

Loudly, “Rise and shine. Zero four hundred. Tea is in the kitchen.”

Swift is pouring tea as I arrive at the table.

“What is it like, being a Unicorn? Just a quick version because when Steel and Shining get here, you are going to be busy.”

I reply, “Fun. But I like the wings best. . . Hello, Twilight. We’re talking about you.”

She eyed me critically, “Did I hear you talking about wings?”

“Afraid so. After I was satisfied that you are whole and uncompromised, I got distracted. I really want wings now.”

“You’ll probably have them some day soon.”

And then the organized attack began with Shining on Twilight and Steel on me.

Steel is first, “What in the hell possessed you to take such a wild assed risk with a Princess?”

Shining is next, “Dammit, Twilight, you could have crippled or killed yourself or him.”

But Twilight isn’t taking it, “Bull shit, Shining, you’ve been in his head. You know better than that.”

Uh Oh. I see a Problem, “Twilight, Shining has never been in my mind, just my memories. We’ve never done anything like you and I did.”

Now both of them are staring at me, “I didn’t know the difference until today.”

Steel wasn’t letting go, “And why would that make a difference? You’ve never been trained anyway.”

“It makes a big difference because nopony can read most of my memories but me. The ones from Terra are too foreign.”

Twilight jumps in, “Steel, he can read my memories better than I can. He’s more organized. And he’s so damned in control that I had to push him into the sex.”

For some reason that shut both of them up. But AJ arrived about then.

“What’s going on?”

I just had to say, “I did it again. Everypony is excited at me.”

So Swift pipes up, “Except me.”

“So let’s have tea and breakfast then we can open our boxes. Celestia will need the official report on them today.”

So that’s what we do.

I have an idea. So I look for the barrels first. I find one and look up it. The second one is the same way.

“Mares and Stallions, we have a theory. Let’s find a magazine and prove it.”

I look through some more boxes and find three magazines. I have to shake the rounds out of them.

“The theory is confirmed. We have a low level traitor in our midst. Based on my observations and some education on magic provided by our resident expert, these parts were seen but never touched. Somepony viewed them remotely and produced sketches. The operation we busted was trying to produce a weapon based on pictures without any actual experience with the pieces. Now the important question is which Unicorn spends a lot of time in a nearby room?”

Steel is really interested, “How sure are you?”

“Slightly less sure than I am in the raising of the sun.”

“Can you explain?”

“Sure. It’s generically called a ‘rifle’ because the secret to consistent accuracy is a very special treatment of the inside of the barrel called rifling. Without it the weapon has less than a tenth the useful range. The insides of those barrels are finished smooth. So whoever made the parts didn’t get to see the inside of a barrel.

“Second, the magazines hold twenty four individual rounds fed into the action of the gun by a spring. It’s a tricky spring to be able to compress so thin and expand to the entire length of the magazine for reliable feeding. You can’t know that by looking at the magazine laying on a table but if you handle it the pressure is easy to feel. There is no spring in these magazines.

“Three of the four key holders for that room have been examined and found to be without taint. It takes two keys to open it. Therefore the door has not been opened. By now the examiners have verified that the bank’s books are in order and AJ’s account has reappeared, complete with payment for the apples. The paying account will trace back to the dead contractor as will the contract on the building in Baltimare. He will have paid for everything with gold and left phony addresses.

“So it’s a stalemate. We screwed up and overreacted when a minor clerk messed up the records. They got caught sneaking cookies. They can’t complain without the spying coming to light and we can’t complain about it without publicizing things best left unsaid. We’ll start a process to get Royal funds out of their banks and they’ll snivel about damage to their building and dead Unicorns. The next round will be nastier.”

Swift asks, “What do we do next?”

“You watch these boxes until Twilight can figure out a good place to keep them. Steel, you know what we need. Please try to keep him in shape for questioning. Shining, we have a date later today. Aj, go take care of the farm but be damned careful while you do it. I’m going to go break the bad news to Celestia.”

Celestia is not pleased, “John, you mean to tell me that after all of that, there's nothing we can do to them?”

“It’s not all bad. We discovered the existence of their spy organization and crippled their ‘research bureau’. We’ll pull all of the Royal money out of their bank and cripple it. All we’re out is a little time and some minor face. That’s not a bad trade at all.”

Celestia grinned at me, “And I have some news for you. You are going to have to put in a lot of throne time. I never imagined that so many would request you to hear them. You are one popular stallion and we need to encourage that popularity.”

“Can we mix it up and let me hold a Night Court every now and then? I don’t want Luna to feel ignored.”

“That’s a good idea. Right now it’s my turn so I’ll be expecting a report tonight.”

I head back to the apartment. When I get there I find out that Twilight is taking AJ back to the farm and Steel is in his office. Shining is gone to the tower to find Cadance. Swift is watching boxes and thinking.

“Swift darling, I have bad news. Celestia has a pile of requests for me to hear Court. So I am going to spend time on the Throne. Some of them will be Night Courts.”

“John, I like the idea of spending time with Luna. She needs friends.”

“Yes, and she needs to not be ignored. We’ve made that mistake once already.”

Swift reminds me, “We’ve got the Summer Celebration slash Luna’s Return coming up. That’s a chance to draw Luna out a little.”

“Something tells me that’s going to be a long day for me.”

Twilight popped in, “I’m back.”

I wave at her, “Hail o’ wandering Princess. I have great news for you. Celestia has informed me that I am so loved by my ponies that I will have to hear Court, including Night Court, frequently. In other words, you’re off the hook for a while.”

Twilight giggled, “It couldn’t have happened to a better Royal Stallion. What do you and Shining have planned for today?”

“If I can figure out the details, he is going to give me his mouth.”

“That should be interesting. I have to assume that you don’t mean literally?”

“Actually, I do mean literally but only a copy. We are going to try to extract a copy of his body parts like I have a copy of Fred’s body so that my inner pony can speak. Fred’s mouth just can’t shape speech.”

“Have you thought about copying his body and becoming a pony all at once?”

“Yes, but I don’t want to walk around as a fake Shining. I want a unique me. I may take a full copy for later editing, though. The editing and fitting can be time consuming.”

“Wait a minute, you’ve already done this?”

“How do you think I know Fred’s mouth can’t make speech? I’ve already tried using my human voice parts.”

I close my eyes and shift into man-x. Then I open my eyes and look directly at Twilight.

“What did you just do, John. I felt something magic.”

I just smile and step a little closer.

“Oh, that was slick. Are you making a new human too?”

“I’m making a battle body. The eyes not only help with enemies sneaking up on me, they keep me from chopping friends when I swing that monster sword. I’m hoping to have it mastered before the Blueblood battle escalates.”

“Shining is right, you are scary. You enjoy it too much.”

“If it’s worth doing, it’s worth being the best at. Meanwhile, do we have any ideas for these boxes?”

Twilight said, “I think everything should be moved to my tower and put in clear cases. I will control access to the area and I can set it up so you control access to the room. There will be a bunch of magic alarms around it and some of us will look at it every day. At least if they steal something, we will know quickly.”

“I think you’re onto something. Let’s move these boxes there right now and study on the exact location and details for their final place. There’s really not much left that is possible to steal outside of my brain.”

“I thought you still had a lot of human technology in that room.”

“I do but tech isn’t magic. Tech builds on tech. You would have to find the special materials and ways to work them to build the tools to make more tools to make the first part of thousands needed. And I’m the only pony that knows what some of those techniques and materials are, like the rifling in the guns.”

“So why are we working so hard to hide this stuff?”

“Because tech builds on tech. Some of the tech needed to make the tools in my kit can also be used to make some very terrible things. I don’t want even small hints getting out.”

We get a cart and start moving boxes to the tower. It is a small show with such a distinguished guard around a simple moving project but we got it done. The boxes are stowed and Twilight and Swift are brainstorming on rooms and cases. Shining and Cadance are waiting in the upstairs library.

I walk in and get a hug, “Hello, Cadance. Has Shining told you what I am up to?”

Cadance is uncertain, “Yes, but I’m not sure I understand it.”

“It’s simple enough in theory. I have images of two humans and two horses stored internally. I want to edit one of the horses to make him into a unique pony. The most important part is speech. I’ve tried using my human parts but the horse mouth just isn’t up to the task and a human mouth can’t fit an equine head. So I need some pony parts to copy. It has to be a Unicorn to make the connection and I much prefer a stallion.”

Cadance asks, “Is that all?”

“Of course not. It’s a golden opportunity for me to observe Shining’s magic and for Shining to get a look at mine. I want to know what transfers. Think of what we could do if I could teach body swaps or learn Unicorn magic. And I want to expose Shining to my full Terran memories under supervision. It may be possible to transfer selected knowledge. And, no, we aren’t going to do it all in the first hour.”

Now Cadance is firm, “I will oversee. If you two stallions get carried away I will stop you.”

“Why do you think we haven’t done it yet. I want Twilight available too.”

I tell Twilight what we were doing and not to leave the tower without letting us know. When I get back Shining is laying comfortably on a big bean bag so I settle in opposite him with my head in reach of his horn.

“I want to duplicate what Twilight and I did yesterday. You can see my system that way and get the hang of it. Then we’ll move over to me and see if we can apply it there. That may have some hiccups because I’ve never used my own mind that way. . . I’m ready.”

I close my eyes and feel a light touch and I am on a familiar white floor with Shining standing next to me.

“Damned you’re fast. I didn’t even get to invite you in.”

“Sorry about that. I just wanted this setup and it happened. Pick a memory and see if it works for you.”

“How? They’re all too far away.”

“Okay. Let’s go with our sparring match.”

I want sparring matches and the images swirl to settle on many scenes of fighting. Then I ask for recent and the number shrinks as the images expand. I spot one with me in it and pull it to right in front of us.

“Damned. Do I really look that big? And did you follow what I did?”

“I think I did. Where did you learn all this?”

“This how images and vids are normally handled in Terran tech like my smartphone. I’ve got lots of practice. I’m going to run it back and forth to show you how, then you take over.”

I play the image, zoom it, and reverse it.

“Think how useful that can be learning new fighting techniques. Now try it”

I step back to give him command and he plays around for a while searching and zooming images.

“John, this right here is worth the price of admission all by itself. How would you like to teach at Unicorn School?”

“No, I’m going to let Twilight handle that part. I don’t want it to be obvious that I’m the source of any of the innovations. That would increase my value as a target. You ready for the next step?”

“Lead on.”

I want to be in my own mind and the images spin wildly then settle to a much larger vista with familiar scenes of home on it.

“Holy shit, John. I saw some of your Terran memories but not even close to this many.”

“That’s because memories are stored by context and association. Without the base Terran knowledge I have it would take you years to find them all. See if you can access some of them.”

The images swirl and settle on sex. Many images of humans having sex. I guess this is what Twilight was talking about. Shining settled on one and began playing it extra large in front of us.

“Shining, if you plan on playing that one all the way through we are going to be here for two days. Why don’t you take a copy and play it at your leisure?”

“You’re serious about two days?”

“Yes. I’ve been hurrying myself to accommodate equestrian physiology. That’s Melinda and she’s really hot. We were in and out of the bed, on the kitchen table, on the sofa, in the shower and do it all again.”

“And I can keep a copy?”

“The ability comes with the package and I don’t mind. Remember, I want to copy part of you.”

The image blinks and I swear I see a shadow of a progress bar then it is done.

“Shining, time for the main event. Watch closely.”

I concentrate and pull up my body images. There they are looking like big memories.

“Do you see them, Shining?”

“Yes.”

“The one on the far right is original Fred and the one on the far left is original John. Pick one and see if you can copy it.”

He goes straight to the original Fred and damned if it didn’t have a progress bar this time. It only took three seconds anyway.

“What was that, John?”

“That is called a progress bar. It pops up to tell you that the transfer is ongoing and don’t do anything to disrupt it. The colored part represents the amount of the transfer that’s been done. When the whole bar is filled in, it’s complete and vanishes.”

“That’s a damned good idea, John.”

“Let’s go back to your side and see if we can find it. Do not try to use it while I’m in here. I have no idea what may happen if we mix magic that way.”

Blink and we were there looking at Shining’s memories.

“See if you can pull up body images.”

“I’m trying.”

After a little while, “Let me try.”

I step forward and there they are, a horse and a Unicorn.

“Remember that location and they’ll be easy to find again. Last chance to say ‘no’. Do you mind if I copy your body?”

“Not at all, John.”

He has a progress bar in his head too. In a few seconds it is done.

“Shining, it’s break time. We’ve met our goals and both have new toys to play with. I’m sure it’s after lunch and Cadance is probably getting worried. Can you think of anything else?”

“I’m with you, John. See you on the outside.”

And I’m opening my eyes in the library watching Shining stir next to me. Yep, I’m seriously hungry.

“Did we miss lunch?”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty )

Shining agrees, “Yes, where’s lunch?”

“In the kitchen. Where else?” Cadance has no sympathy.

Shining and I head that way at speed while Cadance follows at more regal pace.

In chorus, “Hello, Spike. What’s to eat?” Which made us both laugh.

I ask, “Are we still linked? Or just both forgot to eat all day?”

I’m having smoked salmon, cheese, bread, and fruit.

Shining looks thoughtful, “Would you believe that I’m even beginning to adjust to your diet? Not to the point of trying Manticore, but at least I can sit next to it.”

“Shining, let me warn you. If you start swapping bodies, some of the tastes go with the body. As an equine I can munch on fresh green grass for hours. As a human, I have no use for it.”

Cadance has walked in on this exchange, “If he starts eating Manticore, he’s going to do it in the Everfree because he isn’t doing it anywhere near me.”

I am feeling evil, “Now Cadance, how do you know you don’t like it yourself? Have you ever tried it?”

She just smiles sweetly, “Got any idea where you’re sleeping tonight? I’m sure Twilight will agree with me.”

I just smile back, “Cadance darling, do you know where the biggest strongest stallion in Equestria sleeps? Anywhere he wants to.”

Shining has had enough, “You two get a room. And soundproof it.”

Swift is standing in the door giggling and Twilight’s voice comes from behind her. “Hey, I wanna watch.”

“You two come in here and tell me what you decided about our storage problem.”

Twilight steps by Swift, “We think the floor under the observatory is ideal. We can wall in half of it and the only way to get near it is to float next to the Castle in plain sight. The observatory itself has some of the strongest wards in the Castle so it’s as safe as we can get it without casting it all into the Sun. Steel approves. He also says he has two suspects and is digging deeper.”

“I agree with that idea. How soon can it be ready? And Shining and I are having a great day. We are both learning lots of fun things”

“It can be ready in two days and Celestia sends her regards with a notice that you are on the Throne tomorrow.

I smile, “No problem. I’ll just go sit and listen to stories all day while you manage the construction and moving.”

Twilight sticks her tongue out and, “If you two are done maybe some of the rest of us can have a little dinner.”

I’m happy to be done. I have some heavy duty thinking to do. But I need to talk with Shining first.

“Shining, let’s go do a little post event analysis.”

“Okay. I’m not sure why but if you think we need it.”

We went up and found a private spot.

“I want to tell you that when I make a change, I select an image and pour my magic into it. I don’t know if anything at all will happen for you. It might be my magic. But it’s better if you do it laying down because there may be things like a sudden change in height or eyesight. And it would probably be better to do it the first time with me nearby. I’m about to do some editing but that can be paused and it’s no harder than waking from a nap.”

“John, if it doesn’t work, I’ll be disappointed but not terribly so. Some of the other things you’ve shown me are worth the trip all by themselves.”

We chorus, “Good luck, my brother.” and laugh while hoofbumping.

I find a spare bedroom and get comfortable. Closing my eyes, I pull up my ponies and begin to study. After a while I decide it’s safest to simply change heads. I know from the eye experiment that neural and vascular connections can be made. So I choose my splice point. I have to enlarge the head a little to cover a size difference but it fits nicely afterwards. I put Fred’s ears and eyes back on because I like them better. Then I put Fred’s bay over the pony head and throw a few spots on my mostly white body to make me unique. When everything is double and triple checked I make a copy and call it A-Pony.

One more chore to go. I carefully edit out the horn and all associated vessels back to where they join the mains coming up the neck. I move in and stand. Everything feels normal. Muscles all work.

Here it goes, “A. B. C. D. E. F. . . .” It all works!! Time to show it off.

Swift is in the kitchen, “Hello, John. I like the new look.”

“I like it too, though I may tweak a few things yet.”

“Oh. And it sounds good too. Now we’re going to have to start over again on the wardrobe.”

“It’s not that bad. I’m going to keep this private for a while. I want it for a surprise when Blueblood strikes.”

Spike walks in and blinks, “John?”

He hadn’t been around for my farm vacation, “Yes, Spike. This is the me I’ve been working on. I’m going to wear it with family but I don’t want it public. I want it to be a surprise for Blueblood next time he gets stupid.”

“Cool.”

I spend some time in the main room socializing then we drift to the bed pad. I am so happy it hurts being a normal equine with my band.

It doesn’t just feel good, it smells good. But that voice insists, “Zero four hundred, John.”

Sliding out is a little trickier but more than made up for by the fact that I feel good. I want to go somewhere and run. Instead I go to the toilet and do the normal thing. After thumping my chest a few times I do the necessary thing and switch to human. At least the good feeling carries over.

Spike has the tea ready but seems disappointed in me, “I was hoping you would stay pony. I like the way your pony looks. He’s completely unique and still a pony.”

“I like him too, Spike. But if he shows up on the Throne today it will distract from important things and ruin him as secret weapon. I’m going to show him off to Celestia though. That should be fun enough.”

Swift and Twilight ambled in and we all cheek rub.

Twilight sips her tea and,”I really wish you could stay pony. By the way, Cadance and Shining may sleep in this morning. There was a light show after everypony else went to sleep.”

I laughed, “Good. Shining was collecting ideas from my memories.”

Twilight’s turn to laugh, “We know. He did what I told you stallions always do when he got in your head. From the outside it looked like he was going to make a mess on the pad. Cadance was hoping he’d come out with something to try.”

“He did but we don’t know how some of it is going to work. If it does we will have some major new weapons. I need to sit down with you later and run through some parts of it. Swift, did you pack my pretty uniform?”

“It’s in the bag and your small sword too.”

“Good deal. As soon as I get my cammies we are going to breakfast.

The chicken and cheese omelet is good and doesn’t last long at all. Time for PT. Everything is normal and I’m getting over the urge to run after some hard core weight action. Sitting on the bench, I’m trying to decide if there’s something else to try or should I just hit the showers when an Earth Filly approaches.

“Excuse me sir, my friends told me that you were the biggest stallion there is. Is that true?”

“Yes it is. Did they also dare you to ask me?”

She blushes a deep red so the question is answered. She has a cutie mark so she’s probably a recruit.

“Would you like to sit here and talk for a few minutes? I’ve got another hour before I have to be in the Throne Room.”

“Oh! Do you actually get to see Her Majesty often?”

“All the time.”

“You must have an important job.”

“I think I do. Would you like to have some fun with your friends?”

“Sure. What do I have to do?”

“Just smile and go along with me.”

“Okay.”

I reach over and pick her up cradling her in my arms. She trembles then relaxes.

“I want you to grow your body and study hard. I want you to become the great mare that you are capable of being. And I want you to develop your magic no matter what anypony else tells you. And you can tell your friends that I said I will come for you one spring.”

I put an R rated kiss on her and set her back on the bench as I head for the showers.

The usual line is waiting when I come out of the showers. My filly is with a group of her friends and looking dazed as I walk up to her

“i sorry, I almost forgot to ask your name.”

Very shaky, “It’s Sweet Butter, Your Majesty.”

“I’m pleased to meet you, Sweet Butter. I’m John Sampson. Remember what I said.”

I left a another small legend forming as I exit the gym.

Celestia is in her office, “Hello, John. Any good news?”

“Yes there is. Steel has a very short list of suspects. Twilight and I have decided to fix a room high in her tower for storage of the items. They won’t be able to get near it without being seen. And I have something new to show you but we can’t do it here. Can you take us to someplace very far away and isolated?”

“Is that necessary, John?”

“I want to be a complete surprise to the Blueblood crowd and if I do it here they can’t miss it.”

“All right.”

‘pop’ We are standing in the middle of a former castle. It was a nice courtyard long ago but it’s mostly a gap in the jungle today.

Celestia looks sad, “This is what’s left of the original Castle. We are actually in the far side of the Everfree. Is this isolated enough?”

“I hope.”

I undress and shift to A-Pony. A storm of images and sensations hit me. Everything around me is clamoring for attention. My horn (MY horn) is sparkling. Grab hold and slow everything down.

“Are you in control, John?”

“Kinda. I’m still finding all the handles.”

“This is your first time, isn’t it?”

“Yes. I know that if I did this in Canterlot it would look like a flare to every Unicorn for miles.”

I’m getting some real control now. The spewing magic has stopped. My sight is steady.

“Dammit, that was intense.”

“John, you’re lucky that you didn’t blow your own brains out. You have way too much magic to just jump in like that.”

“What can I say? It worked. Now I need to learn how to use it. The trick is that I don’t want anypony to know about it, least of all Blueblood.”

“You have a lot to learn before you start using the horn. A foal would learn it before they got strong enough to cause too much damage. You skipped that part.”

“What do I need to know?”

“The first thing you must do is to get your mind under full control. Random thoughts and memories can ‘come out’ as side effects when you use magic.”

“Already been done. In fact, I’m to teach Twilight more of my methods tonight. We had to do some serious mind searches to verify that nopony was compromised in the tech theft. We found out why I got that cutie mark.”

“Are you sure.”

“Very sure.”

“The next thing you must learn is to see the essence of things. You can’t manipulate it until you can grasp all of it.”

I look around. I can see many things that I have always known are there like the crystalline structure of the rocks but nothing startlingly new.

“I’m fair at that right now. I may have a little advantage because human tech is based on understanding the nature of materials and structures.”

“Then what’s left is practice, practice, practice.”

“What I need to learn most is how to teleport.”

“Not yet, John. You have to have very fine control to perform magic on yourself. One of us will tell you when it is time. Meanwhile, have Twilight bring you some place like this to learn your control. You will break a lot of things at first. See that small statue over there? Lift it a short distance, turn it around, and set it back in place.”

I’m looking at it but I can’t find a division between it and the pavement.

“I don’t see how to separate it from the pavement without breaking something. Is there a way to cut it free?”

“That is the kind of thing you need to learn yet. You did very well to realize that it is one piece. But you must also learn to make it conform to your needs. Right now we need to get back to Canterlot so will you please resume your human shape.”

I change and get dressed. ‘pop’ We are back in Celestia’s office.

“Don’t misunderstand me, John. I am very impressed. You just covered several years of Unicorn school in fifteen minutes. And that’s without even considering getting a horn to begin with. I even like your new coat. But be very careful. You are playing some very powerful forces and I would hate to lose you.”

“I would hate to lose me. That’s why I’m in a hurry. I’m in enough danger as an upstart Earth pony. As a Unicorn a whole new set of possibilities open up. Blueblood will know that he has a narrow window in which to kill me or face the end of everything he holds dear. Now where’s the list.”

It’s a long day composed of many small tragedies and triumphs. I did have one rather pleasant moment. The first Proclamation I read was a request for proposals for a new repository for Royal funds with all of the Blueblood clan excluded.

We run a little long because once word gets around we draw an audience. The audience can’t interfere or even comment. Cough at the wrong moment and the Guard will ‘show you out’. But they have an effect on the principals. Believe it or not, while standing in front of a near god that has the literal power of life and death over him, Big Johnny’s greatest fear is what his mare’s farrier is going to say about him next time she gets her hooves done. We have found another universal constant.

Finally, back in the tower, “Honey, I’m home.” I’ve always wanted to say that.

Cadance and Shining are in the library. I drop my clothes in the bathroom and shift to my new pony.

Cadance greets me, “Hello, John. That’s a very interesting collection of gifts you are passing around. I never imagined that things like copying and transferring are possible. The big one wouldn’t work for us but we aren’t done trying.”

Shining is examining my new face, “I like it but why did you leave a scar where the horn was? For that matter, why didn’t you keep the horn?”

“First, a horn will panic the Blueblood herd. I’ve shown incredible strength as an Earth pony and overcome five Unicorns at once. If I was a Royal Unicorn with that kind of strength I could be expected to ascend any day. That would leave Blueblood the choice of killing me before I ascend or losing everything forever.

"Second, that’s not a scar, that’s my whorl. All Terran equines have a whorl, most commonly about where mine is. It’s connected to the formation of the brain and is unique to each individual. What’s extra interesting is that is my whorl, not Fred’s. Fred’s is different. And this one stays with me when I change bodies. I did add the star to accent it because conventional wisdom says that the size, shape, and location mean that I am extremely intelligent, strong willed, and social.”

“By ‘star’ you mean the white part?”

“Yes. And technically my coat is bay and white tobiano. Bay means the brown with black mane and tail.”

I can hear voices coming down the stairs from above. It’s Twilight and Swift.

“How are our construction workers doing up there?”

As Twilight comes into view, “Quite well. How about our Noble Stallion?”

“Wondering if you want to trade jobs?”

“Oh hell no! Been there. Done that. Threw the shirt away.”

As she’s rubbing cheeks with me, Swift comes up and starts on the other side. This is life the way it should be.

“Twilight, after dinner we need to continue my education and we may have to travel.”

I have an equine dinner and love the flavors.

Twilight and I take our positions on a bean bag in the library and in a few seconds we are on the now familiar white floor in Twilight's mind.

“We learned some things when Shining and I were exploring. I want to combine two lessons into one today. I want to get you upon the features of this browser and I need all the horn instructions I can get.”

I turned to the images and wanted magic instruction. There were a lot. So I tried magic exercises. Also a lot.

“Twilight, I need unicorn education after visualization up to teleporting. Can you help?”

“Of course, but why do you need this?”

I try something new. I was in my inner pony when we linked so I am still him inside. I have changed bodies in dreams so I know I can do it without altering my physical body. I consider the details then will it. Now the me standing next to Twilight had a horn.

“Yes, that’s an excellent reason. I’ve got to tell you that all I or anypony can give you is hints. It’s the doing that brings the learning.”

“I understand. My problem is that I have to learn as much as I can as fast as I can. I don’t want anypony outside of selected herd members to know about this until I have full control and use. It changes too many things.”

She started flipping through and pointing out memories while I made a list.

“John, are you going to watch any of these?”

“All of them. Do you mind if I save copies for myself to watch later?”

“You can do that?”

“That’s part of today’s lesson.”

“Show me.”

I copy the list and in the process have to explain the progress bar again.

“John, I am going to make a list for you later when I can take time to consider all the details. We can pass it later. Do you have any other surprises?”

“Let’s step over to my side.”

And we are standing in front of my memories. I flip through quickly to find the other side of the memory Twilight had ‘pushed’ me into and bring it to right in front of us.

“And as promised, the other point of view.”

“I deserve that, don’t I?”

“In more ways than you know. I don’t expect you to wade through it all right now but take a copy for later study. That’s your practical exercise.”

“Do you think I should study some human sex too?”

“Why? You’re already way out of their league.”

“John, you continue to surprise me. That’s the nicest thing anypony has ever said to me.”

“It’s true.”

She leans over and rubs her horn against mine and the world explodes. I feel her. I feel her desire. I feel her feeling my desire. And it spirals wildly until she breaks the contact.

“Consider that another Unicorn lesson.”

We explored Terra for a while. I showed her planes, trains, cars, and TVs. She wants to stay for a while.

“John, you actually know how to make all those things?”

“Mostly, yes. I’m used to being able to order parts and have them arrive in a few days at most. I could buy many metals that I’m only kinda aware of how to make. But I know enough to put some ponies on the right track to make something very like it. The problem is what those kind of changes might do to Equestria. They call the output of those engines ‘horsepower’ because that’s what they’re designed to replace. Do you want to put that many ponies out of work?”

On that note we stepped back outside.

Everypony else was asleep. Twilight and I have the library all to ourselves.

“Celestia took me to the old castle in the Everfree for my demonstration. Do you feel up to something like that or do you want to wait?”

“Ready?”

“Yes.”

‘pop’ Twilight and I are in the same courtyard except we’re under a full moon. I shift to my A-Pony and I can see and ‘see’. There’s no fireworks this time and I’m comfortable.

“How are we doing, John?”

“We are doing good and enjoying the new view of the world.”

“I can feel your strength. Apparently you are as strong as a Unicorn as you are as an Earth pony.”

“That would make perfect sense.”

“You see that bench over there? See if you can lift it. Be very sure to specify slowly and how high.”

I see it and ‘see’ it. It’s a simple stone plank on top of two stone blocks. I see the divisions. I touch the plank with my magic and will it to lift slowly to waist high. I lifts on one end and begins to slide. I reach out with my hands and steady it. No problems. Then I realize that it’s over there across the courtyard and I’m a pony. But I can still feel it in my hands. So I pick it up with my hands, turn it over, swap ends, and set back exactly on the blocks.

“Twilight is staring at me, “How did you do that?”

I choose a flower from the bush behind the bench. Carefully cupping it in one hand, I squeeze the stem behind the flower with my other hand until it separates. I carry the flower over to Twilight and carefully insert it into her mane between her ears. Then I caress her cheek feeling every hair and loving it. She leans into my touch a little and purrs.

“I think I’ve got fine manipulation down. Can you come into me and watch how I do it?”

Twilight steps over to me and rests her horn lightly on my head. I feel her presence.

I reach over to the bush and cut another flower placing it next to the flower already in Twilight’s mane.

“You’re using your hands, John?”

“No, I’m using my magic. It’s like the memories. What you are seeing there is a common computer file browser. I’ve used many of them for years. I’ve even written a couple. Now how many digital computers are there in Equestria? One. My smart phone. But magic has no form. Your will gives it form, right?”

“Right, John.”

“So I come from Terra with all these forms that nopony has ever thought of. They shape my magic in ways previously unknown in Equestria. All that time you spent in Unicorn school wasn’t learning magic. It was learning fine motor skills. Being born human, I come with extreme fine motor skills.”

“That makes scary good sense."

I play around with the landscape for a while. There doesn't seem to be any limit on how much I can lift. I just make my magic hands bigger.

Twilight is bored, "Right now, I think we need to rest and digest. You may come up with some more wild ideas. Go ahead and change back.”

I do and ‘pop’ we are home. Creeping quietly, we merge into the pile and drift away.

“Zero four hundred, John”

Slide carefully out of the pile, hit the toilet. Thump my chest, and head for the kitchen. I’m annoyed but I have to learn.

“Spike, please put my tea in something Earth pony friendly. It’s my fault for not having a system to tell you what I am this morning.”

“John, I’m not sure anypony has ever had that problem.”

Twilight wanders in just then, “What problem?”

“Waking up in different bodies on different days.”

Swift joins in, “Sounds like a stallion problem to me.”

“Twilight, my subconscious has been busy with those new memories and experiences. I feel like something is missing right now. I’m tempted to just do it.”

“You might want to get some more experience first. There’s still some important things you haven’t tried.”

“My mind knows you are right but the rest of me is going nuts.”

Swift is looking from me to Twilight and back, “What in the hell are two gibbering about?”

I hadn’t thought about this part of it. “Swift, I’m turning into a Unicorn. I haven’t meant to hide it from you but most of it is happening inside my head.”

Swift just smiled, “About time.”

Spike says, “Cool.”

“Please help me keep this inside the band. It would trigger madness if it got out to Blueblood.

“And Twilight, I’ve been thinking. Handling information, making useful things, doing complex tasks, these are all the basics of civilization. Humans and ponies developed parallel ways of doing these things. I was an elite top level technologist on Terra because of the skills you’ve been seeing me exercise. So why shouldn’t my pony self parallel that on Equestria?”

Twilight is agreeing, “The more you say, the more sense you make. But today we have to move your tech and start preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration. If there’s time left over we’ll practice some more.”

I go back to human so we can eat breakfast and do PT. All went normally and we dropped by Steel’s office.

“You can have your room back after today. We’re going to move it all right now.”

“Where Twilight has said you were going with it?”

“Yes. And we need to have a head session some time soon. I’ve got some new internal tech for you.”

“That sounds extra interesting. Just pick a time and tell me.”

“Twilight and I open the locks with our keys and go in. I reassemble my weapons and kit. Then I leave with everything on my shoulder or carried just like I brought it in. It’s a quick trip down the hall, around the corner and up the stairs in the tower to our new safe storage.

“Mares, I’m going to leave you to party planning. I’m going to pay Luna a visit. I owe her an update and I want to offer her some of the new ‘wetware’.”

Twilight and Swift agree so I set out for Luna’s private apartment. The Guard at the door waves me through. She’s in the main room relaxing.

“Hello and welcome, John Sampson.”

“Hello my good friend Luna.”

I walk over and rub cheeks with her.

“I have something to show you.”

I remove and fold my clothes then shift to my inner pony.

“Mine Sister hath told me of this but not of the look. It suits thou, John.”

“I like it. There is more but I will not show it in Canterlot just yet.”

“Celestia hath disclosed that part also.”

“Celestia doesn’t know the whole story. Twilight and I have discovered that many of my talents from Terra transfer to Equestria. Would you like to see some of them?”

I showed her my file browser and memories of using my hands to pluck flowers for Twilight.

“If beginning magic students can simply download my standard systems, they can spend the next several years on advanced studies instead of what humans call ‘reinventing the wheel’. Graduate students can improve my systems or invent new systems for their thesis.”

We settle back to socialize and I preen her wings for a couple of hours. Luna is a very happy Alicorn so I take a break.

“Luna, I’m going to take a few Night Courts for you.”

“There be no need, Friend John.”

“I know that but Celestia has me taking Day Courts and I am Herd Stallion, not Celestia’s personal servant. I will not favor any of my mares. So if she gets a day off, so do you and Twilight. Besides, I intend to spend any extra time visiting.”

That gets me a full wing hug.

“Swift and Twilight are planning the Sun Celebration. I will escort Celestia to the first half but you get me for the rest of it. I am thinking of changing clothes to match you when I do that. Is there anything special I need to know.

The hug gets tighter and with some heavy cheek and nose added in.

We have lunch in Luna’s kitchen and she’s having the time of her life feeding the helpless Earth pony. This is going to be good for giggles forever.

“Luna, I really need to go somewhere secluded and practice with my horn. I want to be proficient enough to shock an attacker. I have this worry about the upcoming celebration. They’ve used one to slip in assassins before.”

“Thou went with Twilight to the main courtyard in the old castle. Will that suffice?”

“Yes.”

And before I could finish the word, we are there. I immediately shifted to A-Pony.

“That’s what I want to learn most. But for now, what comes after fine manipulation?”

“Didst Celestia play the old rooted block trick on thou?”

“She asked me to lift that statue over there and I told her it was part of the pavement and I didn’t want to trash the courtyard.”

“Thou hast passed the first half of thy test. Now thou must learn to make the statue ready for thy lifting. Watch with thy magic.”

I stood watching as she wrapped the statue in her magic then pulled the magic up to the middle of the column it is sitting on. Her magic rippled then I could ‘see’ that there is a division between the top and bottom halves of the column. Her magic rippled again and there is no division.

“I see the division come and go but I don’t see a cut or join happen.”

“This requires a faith in thyself. Just as thou may wrap the statue in thy magic and lift it, thou may wrap it and change it. I willed that the statue be with division and I willed that it be without. The trick be in knowing for the first time that thou canst alter the solid world by thy will.”

I reach out and wrap a hand around the statue. I decide that it should have a neat platform on top of the column and be standing loose on it. I will it so and lift the statue enough to see air under it. Then I grasp the head with my other hand and will a separation in the neck. I rotate the head half around and will the separation to be gone. Then I set it back on its platform and will that separation away.

“You forgot something. I already know that I can throw a spell that alters an entire world. Remember my Oath?”

“I would give much to witness Celestia’s countenance when next she visits this place. Very well done, Friend John. There remains one test between thy will and mine. Thou must learn the art of self levitation and thou must learn it unassisted. The method of thy learning will be used to learn teleportation.

Change thou back to thy ‘safe’ body and we will return to Canterlot. Spend thine time on this conundrum but do not expect immediate understanding.”

I shift and we ‘pop’ into her apartment. We spend a little more time rubbing and grooming but. . .

“I have to go. I thank you for the lesson and for being my friend. I wish you would come and spend time with the herd in the tower. You would be among friends. Cadance has been happy there.”

“I will consider it, Friend John.”

Human and dressed, I leave past the same Guard pony. Back in the tower, nopony is home but Swift. She’s in the library, reading. I plop down beside her and lift her on top of me.

“I remember this and haven’t done it recently enough. You, my perfect Swift, have been ignored far too much.”

“You aren’t ignoring me, John. I feel your heart every time you look at me. I know your love all day every day.”

“But I haven’t said it often enough. And it’s not just the feelings. You are the other half of the Royal Stallion. The half that makes me look good and right on top of everything. I will forever owe you for that.”

“Don’t be silly, John. You are Royal. I’m just your gofer.”

“You are the only pony that believes that. Steel and Shining have both notified me that they will challenge me for you if I ever give them half a chance.”

I haven’t seen that shade of red for a while, “And you just let me go play with Shining . . .”

“It made you happy. You spend too much of your life making me happy. You need some moments for yourself. If anything happens to me, I want you to go to him. Make him as happy as you have made me.”

“You’re the strongest stallion in Equestria. Nothing is going to happen to you.”

“Swift, there will be a time between when the Blueblood herd realizes that it is possible for me to ascend and when I can actually do it that I will be vulnerable. Nopony knows what will happen then. If I fail, I don’t want you to forget me but I also don’t want you ruin what is left of your life thinking I would consider that honor. Do we understand each other?”

She’s clinging hard now but no tears, “Yes, John, no matter what may happen I will always honor you including in this.”

“Good. Now that’s out of the way, I’ll need dress to match Celestia for the first half of the Sun Celebration and to match Luna for the second half. And since the biggest parts are outdoors in the Central Courtyard, I’ll wear my big sword. I’ll look good on the balcony anyway.”

“Yes, you will.”

From below, “Honey, I’m home.” I have to giggle. I taught Twilight that.

“Up here, Twilight.”

Twilight comes bouncing up the stairs followed by Spike. Spotting Swift on top of me, she bounces over and sits on my legs.

“We’ve got him now, Swift.”

I smiled, “Who has who? This has always been my goal, to be covered in warm furry love.”

Spike says, “Call me when the mush is over.”

I reply, “Not yet Spike. We were talking about the Summer Celebration. I’ll be starting with Celestia and ending with Luna but I will always be with one of them. If Twilight gets too involved or has to run an errand, stick with Swift or me. I don’t want you to become a target.”

“Aw, John. I can take care of myself.”

“Spike, that’s not my concern. I know that a small Dragon is still a Dragon. But killing changes you, even in defense of those you love. I want to put that pain off for as long as possible for you. It’s the kind of thing that parents do.”

“But what am I supposed to do if they attack you?”

“You are supposed to do what all stallions do. Keep the mares safe. Get them away while I hold the attackers back. A serious battle with me is liable to destroy acreage. I don’t want to be worrying about them getting hurt so your job will be to get them out of the way.”

“I can do that. And now I can leave you to your mush.”

When Spike had gone Twilight said quietly, “You know that he has enough dragonfire to annoy two ponies at most then he’s out?”

“Of course. But he is a stud. A small, young stud but still a stud. He will do his best no matter what you say. I would prefer that he do it within my plan. And we owe him his pride.”

“Thank you, John.”

“You don’t get off that easy. Luna gave me an assignment. I have to figure out how to self levitate.”

“Then you know I can’t help you.”

“Yes but I need to be in a place where I can try it and you can help with that.”

“Let me get back to you on that. I have an idea.”

Dinner is both harder and easier as an Earth pony. Salad is all it takes but getting it for myself is tricky. We go quickly to our sleeping pile because we are going without the day after tomorrow. With Luna’s Celebration added on I will be going non-stop for about thirty hours.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty One )

“Zero four hundred, John.” Fur and feathers, the perfect combination and I love it. But it’s time to slide off the pad, hit the toilet, thump, and find the kitchen. Spike is waiting to see me before he pours the tea.

“Thank you, Spike. Would you believe that this tea is even better from a pony point of view than human?”

We are a small band this morning. Cadance and Shining went back to the Crystal Empire yesterday to take care of business. They will be back late today to spend the night with us in preparation for the Celebration. AJ will come in on the afternoon train for the same reason and I’m looking forward to showing off for her.

Twilight comes in and up to me, cheek rubbing and lipping my ear.

“Mare, don’t start anything you don’t have a day to finish.”

“Twilight giggled, “It’ll be your fault for strutting around like the hottest stallion in Equestria. But instead, let’s eat breakfast here and then we have a small project to assist your education.”

“You’re trying to torment me with choices, aren’t you? Spike, small fruit, lots of small fruit.”

I wipe out a large bowl of fruit then Twilight leads me up the stairs to our ‘special storage’ room.

“This part of the Castle is very well protected from invasion or surveillance. With just a little more shielding, I can make any magic within this area hidden. You can go anywhere on this floor to about halfway up or down the stairway to the next floor. Give me a few minutes then we can test it.”

Her horn lights up and a net of purple-ish lines began to weave around the room and sink into the walls, ceiling, and floor. Twilight’s concentration increases and another net of lines expands into the walls.

“It’s done. The tricky part isn’t hiding the room, it’s doing so it looks like an empty room from the outside instead of screaming ‘something hidden here’ like that room in the bank. Put on the horn and let me go down a floor and see what it looks like.”

I do and I fumble with the AR enough to convince myself that I could fire it with magic if I had to.

Twilight is back, “About halfway down the stairs you just disappear. It works. You can practice all you want on this floor but remember to lose the horn before you leave this floor.”

“Thank you, Twilight. This is ideal. All I have to remember is to not try too hard and bump my head.”

“John, if you can bend your knees and not fall, you’re done. And I think it’s interesting that your magic is the same color as your spots.”

Alright. Time for business. Start with the obvious. I hug myself and lift. Nothing happens.

An hour later it’s time for a break. Frustration and magic is a risky mix. Switching to my inner pony, I head back down the stairs to find everypony else gone. I need something to stir my mind. Oh yeah. I’m standing in the middle of a world class magic library. Use it, dummy. I change to human to make handling the books practical and dig in. By lunch time I know a lot of really useful things, theoretically. None of it is exactly what I want but I do have some new things to try.

But first, I need food. I put on the cammies and head to the cafeteria for fish and potatoes. Food in hand, I look around for a table. There’s my little filly, Sweet Butter sitting at a table all by herself and a bunch of her ‘friends’ together at a table nearby. This bears investigation. As I near, she is obviously unhappy about something and largely oblivious to the world around her.

So I ask, “May I sit here?”

She looks up and shoots out of her seat, “Of course you can have this table, Your Majesty.”

“I don’t want the table. I want to sit next to you, Sweet Butter. And you see what I’m wearing? Same as the gym. So I’m ‘John’, same as the gym.”

“Oh. . . But Your Majesty, how could I . . .”

“Listen, my friend Sweet Butter, I spend my days worrying about bankers that want to rob Celestia blind, assassins sent to kill me, and hundreds of small arguments between average ponies with just a little too much pride or stubbornness to settle it on their own. That’s a lot for a farm colt that grew up and got tossed into the Royal Herd with little warning or planning. So I like to put my problems aside for a short time when I can. Will you help me do that?”

“Of course . . . John. Is Royal life really like that?”

“Yes it is, and more. Somepony has to do the many things that keep everypony happy and secure. Look at Celestia. She has to raise and lower the sun right on time every single day without fail. And has been for more than a thousand years. Did you know that crops depend on the exact timing of the sun to grow? If Celestia makes a mistake, we all go hungry. That’s why we celebrate the sun and Celestia every summer.”

“I guess you thought I was silly when I said you had an important job.”

“No, I thought that you are intuitive. You remind me a lot of somepony that I love very much. She’s like that. She always says the right thing even when there is no reason at all for it. That’s why I want to know what is making you unhappy.

“It’s just a silly thing. I told my friends what you said and they made fun of me.”

“That’s because they are jealous of you. Every single one of them dreams of becoming Royal but none of them have what it takes. You do. That’s why we are talking. My heart feels it and I know yours does too. They tricked you into speaking with me because they thought you would be like them and lose courage when you found out who I am. You fooled them. You have the courage they lack. You have the qualities I seek in my mares. Now is too soon but I will remember you.

“What should I do?”

“Exactly what I told you. Grow strong and smart. Pass these fools by and leave them in your dust. Life will take care of the rest. Do you go by ‘Sweet’ or ‘Butter’?”

“My herd call me ‘Sweet’.”

“Would you be so kind as to take my tray back to the kitchen?”

“Of course, John.”

“Thank you. Now I must go back to work but you may enjoy watching my departure.”

I get up and walk around the table towards the door, incidentally walking right in front of the table with all the ‘friends’.

As I pass them I turn and say loudly, “Thank you for an interesting conversation, Friend Sweet.”

About half of them look like they are having seizures.

When I get back to the tower I go straight up to the hidden floor. I have a few things to try. The shield works nicely. I can even put it on the floor and stand on it. From there I can lift it and fly it around all I want. It isn’t the goal but it looks damned useful for transporting groups.

Everypony talks about the necessity of fully knowing whatever it is you want to manipulate so I look at myself. There’s a lot to see but no worse than what I’ve already seen editing my bodies. But other than swapping bodies, I don’t seem able to use magic on myself.

I’m hearing voices downstairs anyway. Time to switch back to my inner pony and go greet Cadance and Shining.

“Hello my weary travelers!” Is followed by cheek rubbing and hoofbumping.

Shining want to know, “What’s your progress?”

“I'm figuring out how to levitate. I’ve flown on a shield but that doesn’t count.”

“That’s some advance magic, John. I’d like to see it.”

“That’s easy. I have a practice room in the tower now.”

Cadance couldn’t let that pass, “Now that’s what I call pampering. Twilight must really love you, John.”

I laugh, “Well, she does. But she also got herself out of having to ferry me to remote locations to practice.”

That’s worth a general laugh and we trade gossip and grooming until Twilight, Swift, and Spike walk in.

There’s more greeting, grooming, and gossiping until, finally, AJ arrives. The gangs all here.

I’m strutting, “What do you think about the new look, AJ?”

AJ says, “I like it. Are you going to wear it to the party?”

“Unfortunately, no. It has some accessories that I want to keep secret for now so I can’t let this outside of the Herd. We can go upstairs and I can show it off if you want. Shining wants to see me show off too.”

“Let’s go.”

So I lead the troop upstairs until we pack the small ‘safe’ room. I shift to A-Pony.

Shining jumps right on me, “That’s not my horn.”

“What are you talking about, Shining? I haven’t swapped bodies with anypony else.”

“My horn has five bands. It’s been that way for a while now. Your horn has six bands.”

So I look to Twilight who is standing with Cadance giggling.

“Come on mares, give it up.”

“John, your horn grows with your age and your magic. Celestia has nine bands, Luna has eight. You’re just growing.”

Somehow I’m not completely satisfied but I’m going to treat it as a new subject to research next time they leave me alone with the library.

I demonstrate my riding shield and Shining admits it’s a tough shield even without the riding trick. Just to impress the mares, I anchor to it and turn upside down.

Back in the library I shift to human so I can groom AJ and talk at the same time. I fill her in on the exciting events and she brings me up on farm status. After a light dinner we pile in the bedroom.

“Zero four hundred, John.” Do I have to? The pile is nearly complete and oh so comfortable and secure. But today is Celebration day and I have a part to play. So slide out, toilet, thump, and tea. I’m feeling good and I need to be one of the very first on stage so I get the body and cammies.

Swift is watching and asks, “Do you want me to pack your pretty clothes and sword?”

“No, I just don’t want to chance a breakfast accident. I have to come back by here so I’ll dress here.”

The cafeteria has a fair contingent of dressed Guard including Steel. I sit down with my omelet and oatmeal next to him.

“You know that you can change or even spend the night in the tower? You might want to come inspect the secure room anyway.”

“I trust you to handle it, John.”

“There are some new weapons in there. If anything goes sideways, I can bring very high level force to bear now. I’ve got a pretty wicked shield too.”

“Now that sounds worth a trip. Hope we don’t need any of them today.”

“Me too.”

Back in the tower I get into my Celestia colored pretty uniform then buckle on my big sword.

“Swift, how about packing my Luna outfit and leave it in Luna’s apartment so I can put it on right before going up to the balcony?”

“It’s packed and your small sword with it just in case.”

Celestia is bustling about in her apartment making sure everything is just so. I’m standing next to the door to the balcony, waiting.

Finally, she decides it’s time. I’m up the stairs two behind her. She goes out onto the balcony and I go one step out and two right. Assume parade rest. I’m watching with new eyes. Could I do that someday? She’s done and smiling for the crowd. Celestia whirls and heads down the stairs with me right behind her. In the apartment she slows down.

Celestia grins at me, “Ready to face the crowd?”

“Oh course. FYI, I left you a present in your favorite deserted courtyard. And, if anything goes crossways, I have a small collection of large weapons in my Unicorn shape.”

“I heard you were working on levitation.”

“I have a good idea that I haven’t tried yet but I can fly without it if needed. I’ve been spending time in Twilight’s library.”

“You may find some of our visitors extra interesting. We have some Minotaurs here today. One or two of them might even be bigger than you.”

“Just don’t let Fred see them.”

“Why not?”

“Fred was born to herd and control bovines. And he really enjoys it.”

“What about you?”

“I can’t say until I meet them. It won’t change what I do anyway, just how much I enjoy it.”

“Let’s go and bask in the admiration of our ponies.”

“I’d be happier if they admired in smaller groups.”

“Get used to it, John. You have many years of it ahead of you.”

And we step out into the main courtyard side by side to acknowledge the salutes and bows of our grateful ponies. Strolling around side by side with a goddess is quite an experience. So many ponies, all eager to pay homage. Interestingly, I seem to be drawing as many as she is. I’m certainly a heavy favorite with the military contingent. After a while we arrive at the dais and Celestia settles down.

“Walk around, John. I want to see if you are as popular on your own.”

I do and I am possibly more popular by myself. The biggest difference is that I have parents bringing their foals to meet me. Celestia is going to love this, I’m a role model.

Twilight and AJ are coming so I angle to meet them.

“Hello, my lovely mares. Are we enjoying this bright sunshiny day?”

Twilight sticks her tongue out at me and AJ giggles.

“Decorum, my darlings, decorum. We are here to be an example.”

Twilight isn’t buying it, “Oh fooie. This is a Celebration.”

“I tell you what, why don’t you stay here with me for a few minutes and do the foal kissing?”

“Do what?”

“Half of Equestria wants their offspring to see me as an example. Celestia is sitting over there in comfort enjoying the show.”

AJ understands. I get a hug for that.

AJ says, “Relief is on the way. Spike and Swift are supervising lunch. Trays will be coming shortly.”

“Now there’s a mare with priorities.”

I manage to get a seat between Celestia and Twilight while we eat but then I’m back ‘on patrol’. I keep seeing Minotaurs in the distance and I know they see me because we both stick up out of the crowd like flagpoles but I can’t seem to get near one.

It is mid afternoon and the crowd has thinned. Time for a break. I get comfortable next to Celestia.

“Did you figure it out?”

“Yes and no. You draw a different crowd. I can’t figure out why.”

“It’s the Earth pony effect. After thousands of years we finally have an Earth pony that made it to the top. ‘Look here little Suzy and Bobby. If you work hard you can be just like him’.”

“But that’s always been true.”

“Celestia, for a pony so damned smart, you have some very deep blind spots. They don’t see time the way you do. For your average pony, fifty years is eternity because they won’t be active fifty years from now even if they are alive. They can feel their body age, see each hair turn gray.”

“So you are young like them?”

“That’s a part of it but not the biggest. You are the ultimate mare, dam to all ponies. How can anypony aspire to be their own dam?”

“And that’s what you’ve been up to with these informal mornings. You are everypony that made good.”

“I’d rather be their friend than their god. Perhaps you’ve noticed by now that deity is a lonely position.”

“I’ve got you. John.”

“Do you? You have a very powerful weapon and a very dangerous toy but do you have the ‘me’ that ultimately controls them?”

“John you have said yourself that I’m the mare you need to head your herd. Our interests coincide on all levels. You know it because you’ve given me your oath twice now. And I’m offering you immortal godhood. What more could you possibly want?”

“Your heart.”

“I still don’t understand, John. I’ve given you everything that I have to give. Doesn’t that prove anything?”

“It does, Celestia, but what’s most important isn’t things or powers, it’s the connection. As spectacular a collection of gifts as these are, you never asked if I wanted them. You assumed that I would want the same things that you want and started dumping them on me.”

“You don’t want to be Royal?”

“Ah, Celestia. You chose right every single time. I don’t see how it could be any other way. But it helps a lot if I feel like I’ve got some say in my own life. You want an equal. But first you have to learn how to be equal. You have to share, not give.”

“You have to forgive me a few old habits. You know what I’m trying to do.”

“And I’m trying to find ways to help you right now. I’ve got a thought question for you. You know that I’ve got a herd of the absolute top mares in Equestria. Which mare do you think two different stallions have announced a desire to challenge me for?”

“It can’t be me or Luna. If another stallion capable of taking either of us existed, you wouldn’t be here. They would have to challenge Shining Armor first if they wanted Cadance. So do they want wealth or power, Applejack or Twilight? Do I get a hint?”

“Your hint is, one of the stallions is Shining. And thank you for finally admitting that you are behind my abduction.”

“Shining wants Applejack? He doesn’t strike me as the money chasing kind so what kind of back story have I missed?”

“He doesn’t want AJ. He wants Swift. So does Steel Will. So will you, if you ever come out of your shell and join the rest of the world. Swift has done as much as you have to make the Royal Stallion.”

“You are going to have to explain that one.”

Right now she is carrying my small sword just in case I might need it. She left my Luna colored dress in Luna’s apartment where I can change when the Celebration changes. Remember how one of the lunch trays had cheese and crackers and small fruits all just the way I like them? She has the map and directions whenever I travel. She makes the tea the way I like it. I look good because she makes sure of it.”

“How is a very good aide more desirable than an Alicorn? Twilight could do all of that with a twitch of her horn.”

“The ability is the icing on the cake. What Swift has is commitment. Her devotion to me is total. We are a single individual with two locations.”

“John, I thought you abhorred the subservient.”

“It’s not subservient when I’m equally committed to her. She stepped out with Shining last spring and has my blessing to do it again any time she wishes because I want her to do things just for her. But her primary goal in life is to make me the best possible stallion so I can make Equestria the best possible world.”

“I can see how that would be desirable. I can see some of that in you, John.”

“Of course you can. It’s one of the components of love. Luna is becoming good at it and it is making her much happier. By the way, don’t look for me tomorrow. I’m going to spend the day sharing with Luna. You might want to try it sometime soon. You and I might even kick around plans for next spring.”

“If it’s so good, why don’t you spend tomorrow with me instead of Luna?”

“Because I said I was spending it with Luna. Tomorrow night after moon raising is open, though.”

“Would we talk like we are talking now?”

“Some. And groom. Maybe sleep a little. Maybe whatever else you want. Being private opens up possibilities. We might even get into horn play.”

“Are you really that strong, John?”

“I was stronger than Cadance last spring and I have grown since then. I’ve added a band to my horn since last you saw it.”

Holy shit. I’m getting wing action from Celestia.

“What about Luna and Twilight?”

“Neither of them made a contest out of it though Luna and I did exercise each other.”

Yep, the wing is growing.

“Celestia, the ponies are watching. If you want to give them a show, I will, but it’s probably more appropriate to the Spring Fling.”

“How much show?”

“About this much,”and I lean over and take her head in my hands slowly caressing both cheeks then I lean a little more and kiss her as thoroughly as I know how. As we hold the kiss I can feel her magic exploring my body. I’m glad I’m wearing pants.

We break the kiss and Celestia tucks her wings back into place. I notice a noise. Looking up for the source, I discover that not only do we have an audience, they are applauding.

Celestia looks a little bemused, “I wonder who they are applauding, you or me?”

“They are applauding us. They spend their entire life seeking and enjoying companionship in its various forms. They are born to herd. A solitary existence is painful to them. They want you to be happy.”

I’m borrowing Luna’s shower so I will be fresh when I appear as Luna’s protector.

“Dost thou poor little Earth pony require assistance with the shower?”

“Not if you plan to raise the moon tonight. After warming up with Celestia you need to be careful how you walk in front of me.”

“Be it true that she asked thou for the kiss?”

“Yes, indirectly. But what didn’t show was what she was doing with her magic under my clothes.”

“This is most exciting, John. Her desire to be ever independent and aloof was one of the core elements of our argument so many years ago.”

I got dried and dressed, buckled on my sword, and waited by the door for the moment.

“It’s time, John.”

“Some day you are going to have to let me in on the secret of your clock.”

But she is by me on her way up the stairs so all I can do is follow. One step out and two steps left. Assume parade rest. I can see her magic as she raises the moon. The raising is simple but the handle is complex. And the big question is how can I see it in my no magic human body? Is all this high power magic around me soaking in?

Luna stands at the rail and smiles for her ponies then we head downstairs and out to stroll the crowd. This crowd is different. We have Batponies, and Batpony foals. The other tribes are all there but almost no foals. And the big difference is that the Batponies want their foals to meet Luna and I together. The walking is much slower because so many ponies want to talk instead of just bow and back. I like this better.

The minotaurs are still around and still keeping their distance.

After a while we settle on the same dais now sporting Luna’s colors.

“I like your crowd better, Luna. They’re more connected, more participating.”

“Be there such a big difference?”

“Yes, your Batponies are interacting with you, the individual, as opposed to Celestia’s abstract goddess image. It’s healthier.”

“An interesting way of looking at it, John. Have thou progressed on thy conundrum?”

“I think I have but I’ve been too busy to test it. I am becoming less hurried in my pursuit as other strengths are developing.”

A Batpony of Luna’s Night Guard is standing quietly in the shadows behind the dais.

“Captain, why don’t you come around here and join the conversation?”

He jumps a little but didn’t immediately move.

“Yes, I mean you behind the dais.”

Luna spoke, “John, my Night Guard are supposed to walk the shadows around me.”

“I understand that, Luna, but he has reminded me that I have been remiss in some of my duties and I must rectify that mistake before it becomes too late.”

The Batpony comes around and approaches us from the front, “Your Majesty, I am at your service.”

“Captain, I should have spent time with you and your ponies before placing you in a public situation like this. That is my fault and I apologize for having to disrupt things to correct it. As you may have guessed, I can see you in the shadows even when my nose is pointed in another direction. I am also far faster and stronger than you might imagine. And I am wearing a sword with a reach greater than your best spears. So if something should happen, get Luna to safety and stay out of my way. It takes a half acre to draw this monster but I can do it faster than you can see. I will draw all threats to me and dispose of them while you and your ponies keep Luna safe. Do we have understanding?”

“Yes, sir. We have heard of your strength and speed but it is good to have it confirmed.”

“I am going to be taking some Night Courts in the near future. We may find some time afterwards to spar or exercise. You need to know who you are working with. Tonight, we have another question. Can you see the several Minotaurs gathering in the far corner of the courtyard towards the moon?”

“Not well enough to identify them, Your Majesty. Would you like them investigated?”

“Please. And if action begins, drop the titles and shout ‘John’. It’s faster.”

“Yes, Sir.”

The Batpony turns and squeaks briefly. A show detaches itself from the courtyard wall and drifts away. A few seconds later a similar shadow drifts above the Minotaurs in a loop and along the south wall to disappear over the west wall.

A few seconds later a Batpony lands next to the Captain, “There are four Minotaurs in the southeast corner and two more approaching them from the west. The four are armed and are putting on mail. There is enough mail and weapons for three more Minotaurs.”

I acknowledge, “Excellent report. Captain, deploy your ponies quietly. You will take Luna’s place on the dais staying shadowed until they commit. Luna, teleport to Celestia’s conference room and get Celestia and Steel up on what’s happening. Tell them that this is probably a feint.”

Luna pops out and the captain moves up on the dais with me.

“Your Majesty, why do you think this is a feint?”

“We’re on ‘John’ time now. Because last time we tangled I smoked five Unicorns simultaneously. They know that seven Minotaurs can’t be more than an annoyance.”

“Are you talking about that magic accident that happened at the same time as the bank raid, sir?”

“Those five Unicorns were defending something hidden in the basement of the bank, something stolen from the Castle.”

“So there may be a lot more to this than what we see right now, sir?”

“I see no point in risking a flock of pissed off Alicorns otherwise.”

We wait. The Minotaurs are moving around but not getting any closer.

I speculate, “They’re waiting for a signal of some kind. That’s good. It gives Steel time to get the entire Castle locked down.”

The crowd seem to be thinning in our vicinity. Not a big change but the bands are gone.

“Captain, is it your ponies or Steel’s pulling the foals out?”

“Ours, sir.”

“Then Steel must have a message for us because lunch is coming.”

“Yes, sir. But I can’t tell who is bringing it.”

“I can. That is Duchess Captain Swift Trail. I can feel our heart.”

The Minotaurs are closer but not a threat. I step down to accept the tray from Swift and place it on the dais.

“I hope they don’t get suspicious about the lack of magic use. What is Steel up to?”

“The Castle is fortified and all targets are accounted for and warded. Steel wants to know what you are going to do about the Minotaurs.”

“Tell him to line the walls around the courtyard with Guard then I’m going to negotiate with them. Have any ambassador or known employer that can be located brought in. Now get back inside quick.”

Before Swift can turn to leave, the Minotaurs are coming at full charge.

“Captain, get Swift in the Castle. She’s a target.”

I crank up my strength then walk out to meet the Minotaurs pulling my sword as I go. The Night Guard are pulling back from their line of attack and filling in behind them.

Deep breath and turn up the volume, “Stop!” and they do, looking bewildered. The biggest one starts towards me again.

“They told you that I don’t have any magic, didn’t they?”

That stops him again.

“They lied. Most of what they told you was lies. The only way out of here for you is to realize that and cooperate.”

He yells and charges. I kick in speed and make a simple roundhouse cut across his neck as I step across his path and out of the way of his falling body.

Slowing down and stepping closer to the rest of them, “Look around you. I can walk away and you’ll still have a company of Guardponies to deal with. Give me details of who is behind this and I will give you passage home.”

One of them spoke up, “We want our ambassador.”

“No. You don’t get to ask that until all weapons and armor are on the ground.”

They comply promptly.

“Now step this way until you are clear of the weapons.”

They do.

“Who wants a ticket home?”

Silence.

I turn to the Guardpony nearest me, “Go get Applejack.”

Back to the Minotaurs, “I don’t expect you to know who AJ is so I’m going to help you. She’s a member of the Royal Herd and an Element Bearer, the Element of Honesty. You can’t lie to her and you can’t hide from her. Information not volunteered does not earn a ticket home.”

Silence. Anypony this disciplined has to be military.

AJ comes in at a full gallop, “We can’t find Swift.”

Focus, “Details?”

“Swift never got back from taking you lunch and there is a dead Nightguard between the dais and the Castle. According to witnesses she was walking with the Night Guard but nopony saw anything happen to them.”

I step back and concentrate. I can feel an even three part beat so I know she is alive and not too stressed but I can’t seem to get a direction. AJ is right in front of me but Swift seems to be in multiple directions. Not good.

“I’m going to look at the dead Guardpony and confirm what happened.”

I sprint over and yep, it’s the Captain. And he has a hole in him just like that last assassin at the Spring Fling. I kick up the speed and run back to AJ.

“We need to extract every single bit of information we can from this bunch. They might know where she is.”

Addressing the Minotaurs, “Your employer has kidnapped one of my mares, a member of the Royal Herd. Don’t count on diplomatic immunity.”

That makes them nervous. I walk up to the one that asked for their ambassador.

“Follow me”

He doesn’t move so I dial up the strength, grab him by a horn, and march him to the other side of the dais.

Pushing him to the ground, I stand over him, “You are messing with my band. Right now the Royal pony wants to make a deal. If that doesn’t work, the monster that eats Manticores will come out. He really wants to play with you.”

Damned if he isn’t crapping all over himself.

“AJ, this one wants to talk.”

AJ walks up and wrinkles her nose, “You must be very persuasive.”

“AJ, I want to know if he tells the least untruth or evasion.”

She looks at him with that special focus.

“Who is behind this?”

We made our way through a long series of questions to arrive at ‘he’s a security contractor for the Minotaur embassy and gets his orders from the one I killed who gets his orders from embassy staff and all they are supposed to do is test our security.’

They all have the same story but the ambassador has arrived and we have somepony new to question. Celestia and the rest of the Royal Herd are with him surrounded by most of the Guard staff.

“AJ, focus on the ambassador.”

“You can’t use magic on me nor can you hold any of my staff. Every Minotaur on my staff has diplomatic immunity.”

“Are these Minotaurs on your staff?”

“Yes they are.”

“Then diplomatic immunity no longer applies. See the dead one over there? All the weapons on the ground? They attacked the Royal Stallion with drawn weapons on the Royal Palace grounds. They aided in the abduction of a Royal Mare. Those are acts of war.”

That shook him.

Celestia spoke up, “John, I’ve known this Minotaur for years and he is an honorable individual.”

“I’m sure he is, Celestia, Aj is standing here verifying it for me. But he is also the chief representative of his government in Equestria and agents of his government are part of an attempted coup right here in front of us. The instant that he gives these agents any aid or authority from his government we are at war with the Minotaurs so just let me handle it. I want him to understand that if any harm at all comes to Swift because he withheld information or help, I will personally escort the entire Minotaur race back to the stone age.”

He’s looking at Celestia, pleading.

“Don’t bother looking at her. She knows she can’t control me in this. I’m plenty strong enough to tear your land to pieces without any help. AJ, verify that for him.”

AJ put the look on me, “John, the Element agrees with you.”

I look back at the ambassador.

He collapses, “There is one other. They are all ‘security contractors’ hired in the capital and sent to me as a package. I can take them or resign. I tried to find their boss to bring him here with me but he is signed out to go to dinner with a pony of the herd Blueblood. They are supposed to be discussing a construction contract. I will bring him to you when he returns.”

“He won’t return. He’s dead by now. They haven’t hesitated to kill ponies so they damned sure won’t be bothered by killing other races. What do you think we should do with the rest of them?”

“I and my government disavow and repudiate all of them and all of their actions. They are all part of some rogue operation not sanctioned by any legitimate agency of the Minotaur government. I beg that you be merciful with them.”

I look up at the Royal Herd present, “We have more than enough for a Royal Court present. Does anypony present doubt their guilt?”

I take a headcount and get all ‘no’.

“Geld and release them.”

Another headcount gets a little hesitation but no disagreement.

“Colonel Steel, can you make sure it gets done quickly? And get them some tarps to haul off their remains without contaminating any more of the Castle?”

“With pleasure, Your Majesty.”

Turning back to the ambassador, “Be sure to make a complete report to your government ASAP. I want them to know what they have awakened.”

I walk over to where Luna is standing, “Luna, please walk with me.”

“Of course, John.”

As we drifted towards the Castle door, “I didn’t even ask his name. What kind of band does he leave?”

“He was Dark Sword and he leaves two mares and three foals.”

“Have they been notified?”

“Yes. The Guard will care for them.”

“So will I. I owe him. And I am sorry for screwing up your day.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Two )

We’re back in Celestia’s big conference room, or should I rename it ‘war room’.
I have the floor, “They will contact us, or me, soon. If they wanted to harm Swift, she would have died one second after Dark Sword. She is a tool to get me somewhere they think they can kill me.

“Can we track her? They have confused my directional ability on the heartbond. Can we enhance it? Even a general direction would help. We could move and mark until we had a small enough area to search the old fashioned way.”

Twilight takes that one, “We can’t know until we try but I am sure that a more magic friendly body would help.”

I have a question, “How identifiable would I be in this room full of Alicorns? I don’t want to scare them too badly because their only choice then would be to kill everypony that could identify them and play the ‘not me’ game.”

Celestia picks it up, “I don’t think it matters any more, John. You just had the Elements publicly confirm your status as a deity.”

“Did I do that? I must have been pissed about something.”

Celestia wasn’t done, “Coming shortly after our public show of social equality and your declaration that I can’t control you, I’d say that you’re stretching your wings.”

I look at Twilight, “Is it really that bad?”

Twilight is smirking at me, “Go ahead and change. I bet your back itches.”

Uh oh. Calmly now, I walk to the corner and unbuckle my sword. Then I undress and lean forward as I shift into my A-Pony. He seems a little taller than last time I wore him. And my back does itch. Looking around, I see two bumps.

Focusing on Twilight, “That’s what you two were giggling about, isn’t it?”

She nods, “And you have seven bands now. You should have a much stronger focus. See if you can use it on Swift.”

She’s right, I can focus better and ‘see’ in finer detail. I can tell Swift is conscious and calm but her direction still seems random. I know it is a magical illusion of some kind but I can’t find a clue as to what kind.

Answering Twilight, “I can tell she is conscious and calm but the randomness of her direction is unchanged. That gives us three possible paths. Research might disclose a magic phenomena that causes this effect. Investigation of their various holdings might show some possible hiding places. And they might screw up and invite me in. My best hope is on the last one.”

Steel has a suggestion, “Don’t forget that Swift and Dark Sword are both Guard. We can lean on Blueblood pretty damned hard without being a magic threat. Dark Sword’s killing was a mirror copy of that last assassin from the Spring Fling and that is not a common weapon or technique. We couldn’t convict him on that alone but we could justify a lot of questions.”

I agree, “That sounds just a whole lot like my previously mentioned investigation strategy. The upside is that the more rocks you turn over, the cleaner the world gets. We’ve got spies, thieves, murderers, and kidnappers to catch. That increases the odds of finding the next step toward our goal. The downside is that Swift is a witness. Getting too close could endanger her. She knows we’re coming and she knows the risks. She is waiting calmly. So I’d rather be damned for what I did than what I didn’t.”

Twilight says, “Spike and I are going to be researching no matter what. If you need us, send for us.”

I reply, “Twilight, go where you have to go and don’t even think about me. I’ll be with Celestia and Luna. AJ, your talent would be most useful to Steel. I don’t care about convictions if we get Swift back safely. I’ll deal with loose ends on a personal level.

“Luna, you will have the hardest job. Celestia will help you but you have the best chance of pulling it off. You will have to sit on me all day every day. Their most likely strategy is to remove the obfuscation on Swift and torture her. In that case I will go directly to her in a straight line and anything that gets in the way will get hurt. AJ will know also and can alert the rest of you.

“I guess everypony else will have to keep Equestria together until this is over. I don’t expect it to last long and thank all of you for your help.”

I walk back to my clothes and sword, capturing them in my magic and linking them to me.

“Luna, I want to spend the day with you as planned but I need to find some food soon and you need to lower the moon?”

“Worry not, Friend John. Thy desire will be waiting in our kitchen before thou can get there.”

“I’ll take all the omelet and fruit you can find. I have a feeling that I’ll be eating a lot for a while.”

We cut through the Throne Room crossing to Luna’s side so I decide to try something. There is enough room for a pretty large wobble. I stop then very delicately pushed the floor away from me. It recedes. Then push the air behind me and glide forward past Luna.

“Very good, Friend John. We can proceed whensoever thou wishes.”

“I will pass on today. I would not be trying this save for the excess of room for mistakes. Between the fatigue and the emotional stress I’m living on the edge right now. Besides, I like this look. Nothing screams ultra powerful wizard coming to get you better than a pony just gliding smoothly along without moving a muscle. I want it to be the last thing Blueblood sees.”

Luna is true to her word. There are two large bowls on the kitchen table. Eating with magic takes some mental adjustment. A whole lifetime of fingers=dirty has to go out the window. Hunger takes care of most of it.

I fold my legs under me and get comfortable on a pad in the main room. I can reach my back to bite it but not well. Magic is simply unsatisfying as a scratcher. Then Luna comes down the stairs.

“Allow me, Stallion John.”

It feels so good. I close my eyes and relax.

Ah, feathers, lots of feathers and they’re humming. This feels good. There is softness against my cheek and warmth next to me. I reach out with my wing to pull her closer. . . . Wing?

That wakes me up and I have to look. Nope. Just a little nub twitching. Luna is looking at me.

“Hello, Stallion John. Phantom wings?”

“Yes. How did you guess?”

“I have felt it. By directing thy own ascension some parts be following the way of the first, natural ascensions and some be in the fashion of thy desire. Had thou but waited, thine way could have been guided and quick like that of Twilight.

“Are you telling me that if I had waited Celestia would have just waved the horn at me and had it done?”

“Did she not mention the next spring?”

“I didn’t get the ascension part of next spring, just the excessive sex part.”

“Typical stallion.”

“There are two things saving you from a thorough thrashing just now. I need to say goodbye to breakfast and hello to dinner.”

“What be thou desire for dinner?”

“Fish and many veggies.”

We are sitting at the kitchen table, Luna giggling as I put away the third full portion of everything, when a batpony comes in. Bowing, she announces, “Princess Celestia requests both Princess Luna and Prince John in the conference room immediately after moon raising.”

I thank her and turn to Luna, “My very thought. I have a partly formed idea that needs development. I am fairly sure about parts of it but I need to look among the clothes Swift left here for me.”

We did and there was nothing here save what I had brought in myself.

“That means that my clothes and small sword are with Swift wherever she is. I didn’t notice that she had her saddle bags when she delivered lunch but it would have been out of character for her to not have them. How long until moon raising?”

“Forty minutes. Thou might wish to witness it with thy new sight.”

“I think I will. I just need to keep back far enough not to be identifiable. I can’t move forward with my idea until Celestia is there anyway.”

“A question, Stallion John, if Friend Swift has thine other sword, won’t it be necessary to wield this one?”

“I’m sure I could because my magic hands work just like my meat hands but I don’t have any way to carry it. It’s just too long for a pony body.”

“Pick it up, Stallion John, and show me how thou dost wield it and I will show thou how Wizard John might carry it.”

So I pick it up and wave it about the little that I can in a small room ending by slicing an apple twice in mid air.

“Point made Prince John. The spell is called ‘wizard’s pocket’ or ‘wizard’s satchel’. It will be any size thou wills and take no room. Thou can fill it as thy wish and it still weighs nothing. Only thou can open it and thou can call specific things out of it. Follow me but thou must do the casting.”

I do and it works great. Where has this been all of my life? Then I have a thought.

“What happens to it when I change bodies?”

“I know not. Never before have I befriended a shape changer.”

So I put an apple and an orange in it and change to human. It’s nowhere to be found. Back to A-Pony and it’s right where I left it and the fruit is unchanged. Good. I put my sword, scabbard, and clothes in and close it. I hold my magic hand out in front of me and call the sword. It leaps into my hand just as I will. I like this.

“Luna, I owe you a very big one for this.”

“It be ordinary magic, Friend John.”

“But you thought of it when it might save my life.”

“It is time.”

For the first time I can see all of what Luna is doing and it makes sense to me.

Back down and across to the conference room. All present.

Twilight has hints but nothing concrete yet.

Steel has his suspect in custody but no talking yet. An amazing number of off duty Guard are hanging around Blueblood’s bank and compound but nothing concrete yet.

No contacts made anywhere.

“I have a question for Celestia. Do you remember that small sword you gave me? The one I said was to mark me?”

“Yes I do, John”

“The one that has a large sun sigil in the pommel? Can you tell where it is?”

“I should be able to but I thought you have it.”

“Nope, Swift does.”

A moment of concentration later, “It’s near Appleloosa. Between Appleloosa and the Macintosh Hills.”

“Can you tell anything about the environment? Building? Cave?”

“No, but I might when we get closer.”

“We need to sneak up on them and put a cap on the place before they can teleport out. Then I can enter on foot in my human body. They will expect that and will know my magic is limited. When they spring their trap, I will shift to this body and go after Swift. Once I get to Swift, I can shield us while I rip the place apart from the inside. As long as they can’t escape, we will end this here and now.”

It is decided that our party will consist of Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and me. Celestia and Luna will maintain the shield and capture any escapees. I will be the entry team and Twilight will be rapid response.

A second group will be Shining and Steel with two squads to seal the Blueblood compound. Anypony trying to enter or leave will be detained and a shield will prevent any teleports. A decision on entry will be based on what we discovered in Appleloosa.

Cadance will hold the Castle and wait for anypony that might show up wanting asylum.

I run back to the tower to get some clothes for the raid but I take a detour upstairs and put my Beretta and three clips in my wizard’s pocket along with the clothes. I have no intention of letting this deteriorate into a fair fight.

We teleport to the Appleloosa train station. I’m ‘riding’ with Luna and she seems to be taking her time with the spell. I don’t mind because I’m learning a lot.

Behind the station we prepare to take off.

I ask, “Can you tell any more from here?”

Celestia replies, “It’s definitely underground and on the edge of the Macintosh Hills. That’s mine country.”

“Can you still cap it?”

“Not completely but there’s a lot better than even chance of catching anypony coming out.”

“Can you get us out after they collapse the mine?”

Luna floats a necklace with a crescent moon pendant to me.

“This can summon me anywhere. If thou can see Swift, use it.”

“I think I’m going in pony. He’ll want to let me get in sight of Swift then collapse the mine on both of us so our dying sight is each other dying. I’m going to have to get a shield up fast. He’ll know that simply sealing us in will just give you a chance to rescue us. I’ll be running on high speed too but he’s seen that so he’ll be expecting it.”

Celestia has one more question, “Can you keep up flying or do you want one of us to carry you?”

“I think I can keep up. Let’s try it.”

I go gliding pony straight up to give them room and they all spread out and unfurl. We all launch off behind Celestia and head south. I feel the wind and my winglets trying to sweep like the majestic Alicorns in front of me. Celestia picks up speed and so do I. I have plenty of reserve so I kick it hard and blow by Celestia to let her know. She kicks it too and I drop back into formation.

In a few seconds she swoops low to the ground and pulls up against a hill. We all land and gather.

Celestia said, “It’s over the hill and down no more than four hundred yards away.”

I creep up and peer over the top of the hill.

“There’s a mine of some kind with a vertical shaft and draw works. I don’t see tailings or transport so I doubt it’s active. I’m going in.”

Kicking up to full speed, I slip over the hill and across the open ground to the draw works. There’s a shiny new rope hanging down into the shaft. Why didn’t they just paint ‘trap’ on it in fluorescent letters? Going gliding pony, I sink down the shaft switching to exclusively magic ‘seeing’. About forty yards down there’s a floor and two tunnels leading north or south. The south tunnel is obviously used but the north tunnel is not so I go south. About eighty yards in I begin to see light. Coming around a mild bend in the tunnel, I see the source. It’s Swift in some kind of luminous bubble. I start forward and stop.

She has a shadow. We are in a mine and the bubble she’s in is the only source of light yet she has a shadow. Her saddle bags are on the floor right in front of the bubble. I can’t feel any difference in our heart either. So I grab the saddle bags and stuff into my wizard’s pocket as I run back up the tunnel as fast as I can. Rocks are separating from the ceiling as I watch. So I go gliding pony and kick in the afterburner. I put a shield in front of me to deflect loose rocks and turn straight up when I get to the shaft. I shoot up to several hundred yards altitude scattering rocks and draw works behind me.

Our heart is unchanged confirming that Swift was never in that mine. Three high speed Alicorns home in on me and hover.

“Swift was never there, just an image. Nopony at all was in there. It is pure deadfall trap. I do have the saddle bags, though. Now we have to see if we can determine who set it.”

All that’s left of the mine shaft and house is a shallow crater filled with rubble. The office yields exactly nothing.

I suggest, “Let’s go see if there is an office in town.”

We take off in our three and a half Alicorn formation and head to town. When we get there we just zip right in and land in the middle of the main street. Lights go on and doors open all through town.

Celestia announces in full voice, “We need the owners and workers from the mine southeast of town halfway to the Macintosh Hills.”

A pony with a badge steps up, “That mine played out years ago, Your Majesty. Some outsiders have been here talking about reopening it but nopony here was hired and they didn’t stay. The County Assayer and Mine Inspector will have whatever information is available.”

Celestia made it simple, “Get him.”

I had an idea, “Did they bring in any equipment?”

The Sheriff replied, “Yes, they did, though not much.”

“Bring the railroad Stationmaster too.”

The Assayer is an elderly Unicorn stallion and the Stationmaster is a young Earth pony mare. Both admit to having business with the outsiders working the old mine.

I turn to Sheriff Silverstar, “We need a private place to talk.”

He replies, “No problem, use my office,” and leads us all to it.

Celestia starts questioning the Assayer but I intervene, “Let me, Celestia, this is another of those ‘my department’ things.”

She steps back and I face the Assayer, “My name is John and I’m the new Royal Stallion. We are here because a small group of ponies from the old Noble Herds resent me. They were robbing Celestia and I stopped it. They have kidnapped one of my mares and I need to find her. The mine those outsiders were claiming to reopen is now completely caved in. It was set up as a trap to kill me. I want to meet them very badly.

“You know what some of them look like. I would like your permission to walk in your mind and see them for myself. We will seem to be standing on a white floor with your memories arrayed as windows in front of us. I would like to find and copy the memories with these individuals in them. I will carry these memories back to Canterlot and use them to find and prosecute ponies guilty of kidnapping and murder. You can say no to all or to any particular memory but I would consider it a great favor to be allowed to do this.

“Do you consent?”

He is staring at me, “Did you say ‘copy’ memories?”

I smile, “Search, copy, magnify, play forwards and backwards. It’s a new system. If you pay attention you will be able to do it all yourself before I leave.”

He’s smiling from ear to ear now, “Please start.”

I place the tip of my horn carefully on the top of his head and will myself in. We are standing on the familiar floor looking a lot of memories.

He looks up at me, “This is different, Your Majesty.”

“In your head, ‘John’ will do.”

“Call me ‘Gold’, short for Gold Digger.”

“Tell me, Gold, when did they first show up?”

“A little less than a month ago, John.”

“Okay, watch this,” and I willed the memories to line up by date starting a month ago. They swirled and it Is so.

“Now where did you see them”

“They came into the office.”

“Did you ever go to the mine or meet them any place else?”

“No, sir. They came into the office, registered, got their safety orientation, and left.”

I discard everything but office memories.

“You can focus on a single memory and pull it to us, like this. Then you can play it through any time you like by sliding the little dot left and right, like this. If it isn’t what we want, just push it back and choose another one. Now try it for yourself.”

He did and shortly we had a list of Blueblood henchponies with first class cutie and coat ID. Then he got to the one I was waiting for.

“STOP. That one right there. I want every second that you have on him.”

I got his ass now. I make sure that I had good clear copies of everything then I thank him and back out. Sanding up, I stretch and smile, “We got him.”

Gold looks up at me, “Is this what they teach in Unicorn school nowadays?”

I grin, “Not yet. This is brand new.”

His eyes get wide, “You made this?”

I nod.

He bows deeply, “Thank you, Your Majesty. Equestria has been needing a wizard like you for a long time.”

Walking to the Stationmaster, “You heard what I told Gold. Are you willing to do the same?”

She nods and bows her head. I make the touch and we look through her memories. It doesn’t take as long because she had less interaction and has better time sense. I get one new helper and lots of confirmations.

Standing back and looking at Celestia, “We need to thank these good ponies and get back to Canterlot. I have all we need.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Four )

“That pony is not sane.”

Celestia looks at me, “What gives you that impression?”

“I don’t know. Maybe it’s something about abducting large numbers of mares and holding them against their will for breeding? Maybe it’s thinking he can take an Alicorn in a straight up challenge?”

“John, it hasn’t been that long ago that it was normal for ponies to act like that.”

“Celestia, it hasn’t been that long ago that humans and equines lived in the jungle and got eaten more often than not. Remember my ‘The noble herds just keep doing the same thing that grandpa did . . .’? This is it. This is how you trash a bloodline. It works in nature because ponies are being eaten as fast as foaled so the weak and stupid get removed. In a civilized setting it perpetuates and spreads the bad traits more than the good.”

Civil Hassler interrupts, “I’m convinced. There is no doubt at all that you two are banded.”

I suggest, “Counselor, you need to come spend the night with us. I have concerns for your safety as long as your ‘client’ is loose. You can choose from Ambassador’s Row, Twilight’s Tower, my unused Guard apartment, or several private bedrooms. I will warn you, Alicorns don’t sleep much. Revile is zero four hundred hours.”

“Your Majesty, are you inviting me to come spend the night with the Royal Herd?”

“Within limitations, yes. You need to be in the Palace. The rest is optional and subject to the approval of other occupants of the named rooms. Luna will be up all night anyway and Night Court can be quite entertaining.”

“I wouldn’t miss this for the world.”

“Good. I like the idea of having you around when he sends for me. Are you up for the whole tour? We can walk back to the Palace. You’ll get a Royal view of Canterlot.”

“Is that safe, Your Majesty?”

“Haven’t you noticed how many of the crowd are single, athletic, and military age? Watch this.”

I salute a shadow on the roof across the street and the shadow returns salute.

“The Night Guard are all around us too. He got Swift right out from under our noses. There is no chance it will ever happen again.”

Celestia interjects, “I’m ‘porting home. Have a fun time with your ponies, John.”

I quip, “Go ahead. Now we can talk about you.”

It’s not that far but it’s slow. Ponies are coming out to say hello and bringing their foals. My new body isn’t making a bit of difference. Civil is amazed and amused. Finally we make the Palace gate and are bowed in.

“That was quite an experience, Your Majesty. It was not even a little bit like what I hear from my clients.”

I smile, “I know. That’s why I wanted you to see it for yourself. Have you decided where you want to sleep?”

“I hear Ambassador’s Row is nice.”

“I would appreciate it if you would join me for breakfast in the morning. My routine is breakfast in the Guard cafeteria at zero five hundred. I could pick you up at zero four forty five. You will have to instruct the staff how you like to be awakened.”

“Will it be as instructional as our walk?”

“More.”

“Then I will be pleased to accept your invitation.”

I escort her to my old favorite suite and send the staff to her on my way out, advising them that I would be back at zero four forty five. From there I head to Celestia’s private quarters.

“Hello, John. Not going to bring your new marefriend home with you?”

“Be nice, Celestia. I opened her eyes to some things she never suspected tonight. I’m going to do it again in the morning. Wanna bet she has some useful information about her soon to be ex clients?”

“I never doubted that, I just expected you to pump her for it.”

“And you want me to bring her here so you can watch?”

“Have you considered that I might want to help? Who else could possibly know more about what makes a mare happy?”

I am standing next to her now so I shift to human and dig my fingers into the soft spots on both sides of her withers.

“Wa. . . Wa. . . AH.”

I work my way up on her neck and back down a little until I find the spot. She begins to wave her head from side to side so I dig a little deeper. Celestia starts humming and swaying. After almost a minute her front legs fold followed shortly by her hind legs. I fold my legs and sit next to her leaning across her body. I work up her neck with a deep massage and she slowly stretches out and lays her head down. In a few minutes she is asleep. I scoot back a little and shift to Alicorn. Snuggling against her I extend my wing over her and rest my chin in front of her withers. There is something primal in this. She is my mare and I am guarding her as she sleeps.

After a while she wakes and rubs her head against my neck and chest. I pull her tighter with my wing and rub her neck with my cheek.

“Thank you, John. It’s been so very long. . .”

“I know. Maybe next time we’ll make it to the bed.”

“You could have carried me.”

“I thought about it but it was the first time I’ve ever seen you relax and I didn’t want to chance losing that. And now you know my dark secret of bewildering and bewitching mares.”

“I must say that it’s an effective secret.”

“And I get the wing compulsion now.”

“Wing compulsion?”

“Every winged pony that I’ve met has had a compulsion to wrap their wings around me, particularly when we sleep. I had that compulsion to protect you while you slept.”

She swings her head around and kisses me deep and hard.

Pulling back, “If you’ll give me a little room, I can get my wing out.”

So I lean a little and she gets her wing across my back as we pull each other tight, kissing and nuzzling. She angles her head a little and our horns touch.

I’m falling into a vast gulf of alone. So much loneliness that it crowds the world. But there is a spark. A tiny point of hope. I cherish the hope. Feed it. Nurture it. I bring it home with me and show it my friends, tell it there’s a better way. And it grows. That’s enough for now. I promise to visit many more times and we separate.

I can’t tell if Celestia is asleep or awake. She is relaxed and happy so I don’t disturb her. We sit there for some fluid time just being together then a Guardpony comes in.

“Zero four hundred, Your Majesties. There is tea in the kitchen.” and he bows.

I nod, “Thank you.” and consider how to separate myself from Celestia. I decide and slide straight forward lifting my wing over Celestia and sliding out from under hers.

“Morning already, John?”

“Yes, tea is in the kitchen and I’m headed for the toilet.”

“My clock says I have a couple of hours but I’ll join you.”

This is interesting. The urge to belly slap has been lost somewhere in the transition. I guess being able to fully clean myself has eliminated the need. The world looks clearer and brighter too.

In the kitchen, “You should get me in on the secret of your special clock. I’ll need it someday.”

“It’s a very simple spell We just need to all be at the same place in the same spell and everything else will take care of itself.”

“I’ve got a bigger question for you, what are we going to do with twenty eight confused mares. There can’t be a significant number with herds to go home to or we’d be hearing the outcry across the land. Where can we put them all? Some could go to AJ’s farm and a bunch could join the Guard but there will be some leftovers. Offer them jobs as Castle staff?”

“John, they’ll be your mares and your responsibility. You’ll have to set them up with a lead mare or mares and incorporate them into your herd. You could have made it an honor challenge but doubt he’d go for that. You made it a stallion challenge, ‘my mares for your mares’ so this is how it works. We’ve got the resources no matter what you decide to do with them.”

“Dammit! I’m not Blueblood. I’m not going to spawn. I may select some for broodmare duties but I’m not randomly scattering seed and I’m damned sure not forcing anypony.”

“You can set them up in Blueblood’s compound or any of his many holdings. You’ll be the new stallion of his herd and all that was his will be yours. If he wins, he will move into the Castle and I will have to find a way to eliminate him and start all over looking for a fit stallion. But I’m not really worried about that. I don’t know that a five band unicorn has ever challenged much less bested a nine band Alicorn.”

“Nine band?”

“I think you gained one last night while you were being my protector. I certainly felt the strength when we joined horns.”

“We’re going to have to work more on this later. Right now I have a breakfast date.”

I go out the front door, down the hall, around the corner, and in the familiar suite door.

“Hello, Civil Hassler”

“Your Majesty, I’m almost ready.”

“The rules for breakfast are simple. I’m ‘John’. No station or rank.”

“That applies to everypony?”

“Yep and it’s not just address. We can compete and joke and most of all, be friends.”

“When does this end?”

“After PT or, if I don’t take it, after breakfast.”

We start up the hall, talking as we walk.

I said, “That suite is special to Swift and me. We had our honeymoon there. I was about ten percent pony and completely clueless about magic. When I got things figured out and we decided it was safe to consummate, I forgot to close the balcony door and we entertained most of the Castle for two days. It got us a really nice fully soundproofed apartment in the Guard sector.”

Civil is looking incredulous, “Two days?”

“It’s a human thing. Humans aren’t prey animals so cover can go on and on.”

“Wait a minute. What do you mean ‘humans aren’t prey animals’?”

“That’s where humans and equines diverged. When they left the jungle, equines developed speed as a defense against predators, humans developed technology and fought back. Now humans are what predators fear and equines have allied themselves with humans.

As we walk through the door there is a little bump in the sound level but it passed quickly.

“They’re getting used to me showing up with guests.”

We line up at the order window I get a nine egg omelet and two bowls of oatmeal with fruit.

“I’m cutting back.”

She gets a fruit bowl. I hitch up the tray train and we go looking for a table. I spot Sweet getting up from a table with friends and moving to an empty table while waving at me. This should be fun.

“I see a friend inviting us over. You should meet her.”

We make our way to Sweet’s table and I park the trays.

“Sweet Butter, this is Civil Hassler. She’s an attorney. Civil, this is Sweet. She’s one of my newer friends.”

Sweet is eager, “They did it again, John. They said you wouldn’t talk to me any more now that you ascended.”

“I think we’ve beat that one already. You might tell them that ascension is a process and takes a long time. It just doesn’t show until near the end.”

Civil is curious, “I didn’t know that John. But now that you mention it, you’re bigger than you were yesterday.”

I had to laugh, “Where do you think all this food is going? But more than that, ascension isn’t a gift. It’s earned with strength and knowledge. Without a lot of both it simply can’t happen.”

Having two mares at the table meant that I didn’t have to do much talking. All in all, they seemed to hit it off quite well.

As we are leaving, I stop at the door and salute the room. They all bow then Civil and I resume our hall conversation.

“And just like that it’s ‘Your Majesty’ again?”

“That’s it. Having regular contact with normal ponies like Sweet is how I keep my sanity in a world going completely crazy around me. I don’t want to grow up to be a spectacular deity that demands absolute obedience. I’ve seen far to much of the pain that causes.”

“Your Majesty, I’m impressed with how kind you are with a strange filly. I wondered if you are just grooming her for spring but I doubt that now. Most stallions have little use for another stallion’s offspring until they reach breeding age.”

“If it’s any consolation, you aren’t entirely wrong. I have told her that if she works and studies hard, I will come for her some future spring.”

“That just impresses me even more, Your Majesty. If you keep this up I may really want to join your herd.”

“Good, I’m about to have a particular position open. I’m going to need somepony to run all of Blueblood’s holdings and help organize twenty eight confused mares.”

“Are you serious? . . .Your Majesty.”

“There are a lot of things left to consider but you are the obvious front runner for the job. You already know a lot about his organization and I expect the transition to be sudden.”

“You know he has partners?”

“I know he is the face of a five herd coalition and I do not expect to be loved by the other herds. Do you think any of them would be willing to follow my lead?”

“You are very right about not being loved. Most of them refer to you as the alien monster that stole their money.”

“If you’d like to go to my office I can show you on their own paper how they were robbing Celestia of millions of bits.”

“I was one of the writers of that grant so I already know. I was told Celestia didn’t care, it was a noble perk.”

“You’ve heard Celestia’s opinion for yourself. And you can assume that mine is much the same except that I understand all the jargon and dodges. That’s part of my talent. And you can also assume that I will end any other schemes.”

“If you know Blueblood is just a figurehead then know they won’t cooperate.”

“Even if I can make them a hundred times more bits legally? Is their xenophobia really that bad?”

“After learning how little is exaggeration with you, I believe you but convincing them won’t be as easy.”

“Could you? I’d give a good manager an interest, maybe more if she asked.”

“How could this be possible? It’s not that I doubt you, I want to know what I’d be getting myself into.”

“I would need a great deal more trust to share the details. You have my absolute word that the reason I keep secrets is to protect Equestria first and my herd second.”

There was another of those small ripples in the world.

“Was that what I think it was? Your Majesty”

“Yes, I’m afraid I can cast great spells by accident still. I’m working on complete mastery of my magic. But it only happens with things that I feel strongly about and would hold to anyway.”

“It served its purpose. I’ll help you any way I can.”

“The one thing that I’m worried about today is why a mediocre Unicorn would even imagine that he could take me in a fight. He’s watched me wipe out four assassins in three seconds and smoke five Unicorn wizards in under a minute all as an Earth pony. How could anypony be insane enough to see me ascended on top of that and dream of taking me? Somepony isn’t stupid. They’ve stolen some well guarded things out of the Castle and taken Swift. The mine trap would have killed me if hadn’t been already more than half ascended. Something or somepony is missing from my understanding.”

“I’ve been wondering the same thing. I know Blueblood gets orders but I don’t have the first clue where from or how.”

“So do you think they’ll sacrifice him or back him?”

“Before you showed up at the restaurant I would have been certain that they would use every dirty trick imaginable to kill you even if Blueblood got killed too. Some of them are hardcore Celestia worshipers. Seeing you with her and like her may change some minds or it may break them. I don’t know.”

I suggest, “There is a way to get an idea. If they are going to sacrifice Blueblood, he won’t own near as much today as he did yesterday. You know some of his holdings. Check the ownership of some of the bigger ones. I can provide you with an escort if you think it appropriate.”

“What kind of escort, Your Majesty?”

“The range is a platoon of Guard in armor to an anonymous Earth pony. My suggestion would be to see Colonel Steel and get AJ plus whoever he favors.”

“Who is AJ?”

“Short for Applejack. Bandmare to Swift and Bearer of the Element of Honesty. Also a very strong farm mare. I need to see Steel anyway to bring him up on the challenge.”

We double back and catch Steel in his office.

I do the quick introduction, “Colonel Steel Will, Councilor Civil Hassler. We need to get Civil in touch with sources in town. I’ve got a stallion challenge coming up with Blueblood and I can’t make sense of why he would agree to it. The thought is to see if his holdings are being transferred out of his name. That would indicate that somepony intends to sacrifice him. I thought that AJ might make a good escort also. Ideas?”

Steel replies, “I’m with you. He can’t be stupid enough to believe he beat you in a straight up match so he’s up to something. And the only other option is that his coalition is planning to dump him because he’s nuts and you would end up with a bunch of mares and nothing else.”

I say, “Getting the mares out of his grasp is worth the fight. Getting Swift out is worth a bunch of fights.”

The ‘plan’ becomes Civil and AJ as common mares visiting a few public places and having private conversations. AJ will have her normal Guard ‘discrete cover’. Civil can teleport both out and will if anything looks a little strange. I’ve got to tell the rest of the mares that I’ve put them up for prizes.

“Hello my good Friend Luna.”

“Hello Stallion John. I hear thou hast stallion challenge with Prince Blueblood over Friend Swift.”

“Well, not exactly. After he bragged of holding twenty eight more mares with Swift I got kinda upset and bet the house.”

“Friend John, doth ‘bet the house’ mean that which it sounds like it means?”

“If you think it means I made it a whole herd challenge, yes.”

“Then this be a fight to the death.”

“I was expecting that anyway. And all of you will have to be there.”

“I wouldst not have it otherwise.”

“I think Celestia is a little upset at me. She told me that the twenty eight would be my problem and my responsibility when I asked for suggestions on where to put them.”

“Oh John. Celestia will be quite furious. You just put the Alicorn Princess of Equestria up for challenge like a common mare.”

“It was the only bait I could come up with that I could be sure would bring him and all of his captives out of hiding. My only worry is how he could imagine he would win.”

“Could he be satisfied with the fame of being the first Prince to challenge for a goddess?” Luna speculates.

“He doesn’t strike me as the kind that goes for posthumous honors.”

“He could forfeit and retain the ‘honor’. Thou ‘dangerous alien’ threat might be brought out as an excuse.”

“I’d still get the mares and his property, wouldn’t I?”

“Such as could be found and proven his.”

“I explicitly stated in the challenge that the mares be present. That’s enough finding to be worth the trip.”

“Hast thou chosen thy seconds?”

“I am thinking Steel and Shining with most of the Guard standing by. How many Guard officers could I get away with bringing besides them?”

“I be unsure if the Guard can have cause.”

“Assume Night Guard Captain Dark Sword represents cause and a representative of the Guard would need to pursue a secondary offense if I fail.”

“That might be a Friend of Dark Sword, his seconds, and several observers.”

“Thank you Friend Luna. You never fail me. Now I have to square things with Twilight.”

“What could you possibly be thinking? Could you possibly be thinking? You put the Royal Herd up for challenge like a bunch of common mares!” Twilight is excited.

Shining had quickly left the room when I came in. Cadance is just sitting there smiling. She’s the one I’m worried about now.

“Actually, Twilight, he was more interested in Royal Privilege than any of you.”

Twilight’s horn is surrounded by a dark cloud with small lightning flashes. I throw up a ‘soft’ shield just as a bolt shoots directly at my head. After six more bolts Twilight begins to slow down a little.

“Twilight, Darling, will you please calm down a little.”

“Don’t you dare . . . . .”

And several more bolts follow.

“Twilight, It was the promise of Royal Privilege that got him to bring Swift and the rest of the mares out of hiding. I could only make that promise as part of a whole herd challenge.”

Twilight’s storm cloud is dissipating a little but I’m not ready to drop the shield yet.

“Did you have to treat all of the Princesses of Equestria like common mares?”

“Yes, Darling, I did. It’s how he thinks of all mares and I had to find a way to tempt him on his terms. He would have just laughed and teleported out otherwise. I sorry if it hurt your feelings but I’m looking at saving Swift and twenty eight other mares from much worse.”

“Twenty eight?”

“Really a lot more than that. He’s planning to double that number by spring. I’m planning he isn’t here for spring.”

“Oh. Why didn’t you tell us you were going to do something like this?”

“Because I didn’t know until I was across a table from him and got to see the nature of his insanity for myself. Consider this your final lesson on living with stallions. He’s threatened Swift and killed a Guard member. He is going to die and everything else has to bend to that end. Help me or get out of my way.”

“Of course I’ll help you, John. I just want you to understand how I feel about being property.”

“Twilight, I’m betting my life to rescue a bunch of mares including one I love from being property. Have you thought of that?”

I drop the shield and Shining peeks in through the door, “Is it safe now?”

“I’m not sure. Cadance hasn’t spoken yet.”

Cadance calmly remarks, “I trust you, John. And I will wait until it is over to kill you if you screw up.”

“Uh, Cadance, if I screw up, I'll be dead already. Just kill Blueblood for me.”

Shining comes on in now.

“Shining, I want you for one of my seconds. Your best shot at him will be right after I weaken him so you need to be there just in case.”

Shining replies, “I never expected anything different. By the way, what was that shield you were using? Those bolts should have bounced all over this room.”

“I rewrote it to use inelastic collisions and absorb the energy of whatever hits it. You have to be damned sure to never use it against somepony stronger than you but it does have its uses. I’ll get with you later on the details.

“I also want to have a Guard contingent there to represent a second cause for Dark Sword’s death. I’m going to stack the deck every way I can think off.”

Shining smiles, “I like that idea. There’s no such thing as too much backup.”

“Twilight, can you please handle AJ’s transportation? I have no idea where we are going but it will be somewhere open country.”

“Of course I can.”

“Thank you, Twilight. Now I have to go back to Steel and get some more things arranged.”

It’s being a very busy day but a useful one. Steel loves the ‘second cause’ idea and has some officers in mind. All I have left to do is update Celestia and wait.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Five )

Celestia is hearing Court. Yes, John, no matter how intense your problems, the rest of the world still has some of their own. So I go looking for Luna. Luna is good for me.

It’s quiet in Luna’s apartment so I look without making noise. Yep she’s asleep. Good, just what I need. I slip softly next to her and settle down. Raising my wing, I curve and shape it so it covers all of her. As I pull, she snuggles against me. Her wing twitches but stops. I rest my chin on her neck thinking ‘yes, this is the ideal sleeping position’ as I slip away myself.

I hear voices but they’re familiar voices so I’m not concerned.

AJ says, “I think I see Luna’s nose sticking out over there. Treasure this sight. That’s a real stallion right there doing what he does best.”

Civil is breathless, “He offered me a job then told me it could be more if I asked.”

AJ is serious, “Then he sees something in you. Don’t screw up and miss your chance because if he said it, he means it.”

I pick my head up and look at them, “If you are going to talk about me at least go in the other room so I can sleep.”

AJ says softly, “I’m sorry, John but we have news. The challenge is legit. No assets are being hidden and at least half of Blueblood’s employees are already celebrating their new boss.”

“Okay. Now I’m awake.”

I start the process of separating my wing from Luna and folding it away.

Luna wakes, “Hello, John. Must thou go?”

“I’m afraid so. The challenge has been confirmed as legit and I have a few preparations left to make.”

This gets Luna to her feet, “Then thy most important preparation will be with me.”

“I was hoping you would say that. AJ, you will ride with Twilight. Stick close to her until the notice comes. Civil, stay with her. Twilight will be able to tell you where we are going. Luna and I have a bit of unfinished business to attend to.”

As they are walking out of the room I can hear Civil say, “Would you believe that before today I actually thought that Blueblood is how Noble is normally done.”

“Luna Darling, I’m going to have a little tea before we get serious.”

“I believe that I may join you, Stallion John.”

But I have to hit the toilet first so by the time I get to the kitchen Luna has the tea brewing.

“Listen carefully to what I say Friend John. This will be both amazing simple and horrid complex. Thou must master both parts before thou can practice teleport safely. Remember levitation and pushing against the world? Now thou must learn to pull the world to thou. That be the simple part. The complex part be in identifying a specific part of the world to pull upon.”

The tea is ready and pouring it gives me a moment to reflect on what Luna is saying. I feel another of those ‘why not’ moments coming on.

“Look upon the room over there. See not only the walls and floor but also the space between. Grasp the individual identity of that space. Canst thou see it?”

“Of course, Friend Luna.”

“Then set thy tea down and pull that particular space to thyself.”

I do and it comes quite easily. I turn around and Luna is at the table formerly in front of me. A simple thought and I’m back, facing the table. I pick up my tea and blink, I’m back across the room facing Luna.

“I don’t see why I couldn’t bring my tea the first time”

“Wizard John, thou art the most delightfully exasperating student that it hast been my pleasure to know.”

“What did I do now?”

“Determining which direction thou shalt end facing is advanced level. Thou should be ready for that lesson in a few weeks.”

“What I can’t figure out is how to be sure you don’t end up colliding with something solid. I know you can teleport to places you can’t see. How can you be sure nopony is standing in the room you are teleporting to?”

“That be the easiest part. If thou tries to teleport to a place already occupied, thou will bounce. The hit will be small and simple to avoid by merely moving over or waiting.”

“I like that. That means all I need to do is get some maps memorized and I can go anywhere in Equestria.”

“Slow down Friend John. Thou needs more than a simple picture to define a place.”

“Of course. I’m using Cartesian coordinates with the center of the Throne Room as my zero point for temporary use today. That’s how I got my orientation right. All I need is to learn the Equestrian standard system and teleport to altitude the first time I visit a place. After I land, I can choose some good way points. That’s unless somepony has already made a book of way points.”

“Be those Terran terms for teleportation methods?”

“There’s no teleportation on Terra but maps and GPS use those things to identify every single location on Terra exactly.”

“We will need to study more on these methods later but I do like teleporting to open sky the first time thou visits a place if thou can be fully certain of the location by thy methods.”

“Not a problem. Humans have centuries of experience using these methods to wander the planet. I want to find out what pony map makers use and maybe swap methods. Right now I want something to eat. Breakfast is gone and I need to replace it.”

“We can have anything brought in.”

“I’ve got a better idea. Have you ever been to Smoky’s?”

“No, Stallion John. I have heard thou speak well of it.”

“I haven’t been able to go out for a while. We can literally glide off of the balcony and land at his front door. We’d make a great looking couple, blue and white wings against the sky.”

“Lead on.”

We went up the stairs and out on the balcony. I spread my wings and give a little push. One sweep and I am floating high above the courtyard. Luna joins me in a few seconds. We glide easily around Canterlot for a few minutes just enjoying the freedom and the sights. The street in front of Smoky’s is crowded so I make a couple of low passes over it and the crowd parts. We glide in and land to the sound of applause.

The crowd opens in front of us as we stroll to the door. Inside ponies are clearing and cleaning the first table in front of the window. I take my time moving that way.

From the back comes a deep voice, “Major John is here?”

A very large Earth pony comes through the kitchen door, does a double take, and bows.

“Your Majesties, welcome to my humble kitchen.”

I smile, “I’ve never known much humble about you, Smoky.”

I turn the flank to him to make it obvious.

“Oh my. Your Majesty John. We hear so many stories we never know what to believe. This is unbelievable in person.”

“Smoky, I’m still the same John and you still owe me some stew. I want three bowls and Princess Luna will take one.”

“Three full bowls, John?”

“Yeh. Just look at me. I’m a growing colt.”

He laughs at that, “And it’s a mighty growth spurt too.”

I call a small bag of coins out of my wizard’s pocket and float it to Smoky.

“I’m sorry I took so long to get this to you. I’ve been kinda busy. I hope the project is doing well.”

“It is and thank you very much for your support.”

Luna is laughing so hard she is staggering.

“What’s got into you?”

“My sweet lovable Stallion John, thou dost not know but Celestia hath been trying to find out where thou goes with these bags of gold coins for months. It frustrates her no end.”

“All she has to do is ask. But please don’t tell her.”

“Oh no. I would never spoil such fun.”

The food is on the table and up to its usual standard.

Luna is enthusiastic, “This is good, Friend John. I may have to get this sent to the Castle.”

“I come here for other reasons too, Luna. The coins feed a lot of hungry ponies. I like Smoky. He was the first pony in Canterlot to accept the strange new alien as a friend. And he talks to John, not the myth.”

I made short work of my three bowls while Luna savored her’s.

“Luna, these are the ponies we guard and judge and keep Equestria for. It fills a great need for them to see us as living ponies every now and then. I’m the Manticore eating alien monster and they bring me their foals. Celestia is the eternal goddess and they bow to her from a safe distance. Think about that.”

“Thou hast great concern over these matters, Friend John. I can see that but I do not understand it.”

“Celestia has gifted me with choices beyond imagination. I know things from my human roots that can both help and hurt many ponies. We disagreed when she told me that I would be expected to replace Blueblood. I know better. I keep my contact with these ponies because they remind me of why I must play Celestia’s game carefully and not fall into traps.”

“Prince John, that be a weight we all carry.’

I had an answer but it went right out the window. Suddenly, I know where Swift is.

“The invitation has just been issued. I know where Swift is. Meet me in your kitchen.”

And I teleported to the very spot that I had chosen for the first time. Luna is nearly a full second behind me.

“I’ll get Celestia. You get Steel and his group. AJ will be bringing Twilight, Cadance, Civil, and Shining. We’ll all meet in the conference room.”

I trot out the side door and down the hall to the Throne Room. Celestia is on the Throne looking bored at pair of lawyer types saying little with many words. She sees me as I approach and motions them to silence.

“It’s time.” is all I say as I continue across the Throne Room and to the door into Celestia’s offices. Celestia is about three seconds behind me.

“What happened?”

“About one minute ago I was eating lunch when the obfuscation on Swift was lifted. She’s west southwest of here somewhere west of Ponyville in the middle of nowhere.”

Twilight and company came storming in the door.

“AJ says Swift is west of Ponyville.”

“I confirm that. Luna will be here with Steel and Guard shortly.”

Luna brought enough Guard officers to pack the room.

I call for order, “Everypony listen. Teleport to AJ’s farm. Use the barn and pasture I started in and stage. I’ll give you a couple of minutes to get Guard and mares ready then I’m going to fly from here. I’ll be there in about fifteen seconds. They’ve never seen a hypersonic Alicorn so the noise and sudden appearance should buy me a few seconds to scout. When I land I’ll trigger Luna’s necklace and all of you can teleport in next to me. From there it will be a conventional challenge with multiple backups. Let’s get the bastard.”

There is some conferencing and horn touches with Twilight and ponies begin to disappear. I call Luna’s necklace out of my pocket and put it on. Luna is watching me as I walk slowly down the hall and up the stairs to the balcony.

I tell her, “You’d better get going or I’ll beat you there.”

On the balcony I look around once then turn up my speed and launch straight up. A couple of good sweeps get me some room then I tuck and kick in thrust. I turn up the thrust until the wind begins to hurt so I put a small conical shield in front of me and kick in more thrust. There is an abrupt bump and everything is silent. I turn up the thrust even more and the landscape is going by at an insane rate. I’m pretty sure I broke some windows in Ponyville.

There is a small farm, just a house and one barn, right where Swift is. I circle once then drop speed until I can spread my wings and glide. I see Blueblood and two unknown Unicorns standing in an open field near the barn. I land fifty yards from Blueblood facing him with the barn behind him.

I shout, “Where are the mares?”

He shouts back, “In the barn.”

My heart agrees with him but I can’t let it be that easy, “Show me.”

He shouts back, “Show yours.”

I reply, “I’ll start mine when you start yours.”

He motions and mares begin coming out of the barn behind him so I grab Luna’s necklace and wish hard for Luna. Ponies begin to pop in all around me.

He’s excited now, “What’s all of this?”

I calmly reply, “Two Seconds, six Mares, and some friends of Dark Sword that intend to pursue a matter of honor with you in the unlikely event that you survive me. By the way, one of my Seconds, Shining Armor, is also a co-stallion of my herd. You’ll have him to deal with before the friends of Dark Sword. I’ll let you walk away with a complete forfeiture and permanent exile if you want to live.”

He is livid, “This isn’t fair!”

I smile, “Of course it isn’t. If this had been a matter of honor I would have been obligated to face you with weapons and limitations that made us equal. You didn’t want that. You wanted mares. So this is about who has the greatest strength and you haven’t seen half of what I can bring to the party.”

I lift and go gliding pony towards Blueblood.

“Last chance. Take the exile or die.”

I turn up my speed and strength and prepare for battle. Then he does the one thing that I hadn’t thought of, he pulls a gun. It is a long barreled one shot weapon designed to be fired by a Unicorn. He calls it from somewhere, aims it at me, and fires. It is so slow that I can see the bullet wobbling off at an angle. I haven’t made to within thirty yards of him so I’m not really worried when he produces another one and another one.

I stop at twenty five yards, throw a five yard spherical shield with him at the center, and continue.

“Don’t make the mistake of firing another of those. You won’t like the result. You have one last chance. I’ll let you go with exile and memory delete for the identity and location of everypony involved in making those.”

I’m memorizing some of the things he’s calling me for future use. He doesn’t seem to be slowing down so I contract the shield by a yard. He just gets louder so I contract it another yard. He’s positively shrill but not slowing down. Fuck it. I turn the shield totally impenetrable and contract it until I can’t contract it any more.

“It’s over folks.”

Steel and Shining are coming at full gallop. Then I notice that the shield is squirming. That should not be possible. It feels cold and disgusting.

“Celestia! I need you RIGHT NOW!”

Pop and she’s here.

“That needs to go into the sun. Can you take it or show me how?”

I feel a touch and I can see the location and a simple variation on teleport. I throw it hard but a tendril trails behind it. I push the tendril after it and release both of them as they begin to burn.

“What the fuck was that?”

Celestia speaks,”That, my great Wizard, was a demon. I thought we had hunted them all down. Maybe we have now.”

“I guess that explains how a mediocre Unicorn can come up with such devious plans. Now where’s Swift?”

Swift is standing there, two yards away.

“John? Is that you?”

“Yep. Some of us had work to do while you were vacationing.”

I step to her and wrapped her in my wings. It’s a long kiss with lots of built in promises.

Swift takes a deep breath, “I could get to like this. Let's keep it up for a while and see.”

I smile, “I’ve got enough span to wrap up the whole band and I’ve found out why winged ponies have the compulsion. I don’t plan to ever go back to human. We do have to go back to Smoky’s. I was eating there with Luna when he lifted the obfuscation on you. We teleported to the Castle in about two seconds. How did you like my entrance?”

Swift is ecstatic, “That was awesome. There’s a giant explosion and hole opens in the sky and you come flying out looking like wrath personified. There were eight Unicorns in the barn that were supposed to bind you with magic while Blueblood killed you. They all teleported out when they saw you coming.”

“Did they keep you with the other mares? And do you have any idea what they are like?”

“They kept us all together. There’s some pretty smart youngsters in the group but most are more about good looks. It’s going to be fun when we go talk to them. Some have been making jokes about my certainty that you would be coming for me.”

“Do any know that Blueblood was a demon?”

“Everypony thought he was just crazy.”

“There’s somepony I want you to meet. You’ll be working together for at least a while.”

We go looking for Civil and find her with the secondary Guard contingent.

“Swift, this is counselor Civil Hassler, former lawyer to the demon. Civil, this is Duchess Captain Swift Trail, the cause of all this madness. Civil, have you made your decision about that job?”

“Your Majesty, I’ve been talking with AJ while we were waiting for the invitation and she’s convinced me, I’d be a complete idiot not to take the job and ask for the whole package.”

“Alright, you’re on the job right now. Swift is the lead for all of the former Blueblood mares. She’s going to organize and sort them. You are in charge of Blueblood’s assets. Find them, list them, manage them. You two will work together to put me in full control of my new herd. Civil, get Swift the resources she needs. Swift, get Civil the ponypower she needs. If none of the mares will do, hire somepony that will. Together, go through current employees and give me recommendations for promotion and termination. This is going to take a while and may never completely end. Civil, get me some bank accounts to pay you a stipend out of until we have an idea what kind of share you are entitled to. And somewhere in all the madness we’ll have a few dates. You understand that the final decision on the ‘full package’ isn’t all mine.”

“Your Majesty, I don’t think anypony will argue with whatever decision you make. I just watched Celestia herself taking orders from you.”

“You don’t understand me, yet. From now on, as long as we aren’t doing something official in public, I’m ‘John’. Celestia didn’t argue with me because these are stallion matters and I’m the stallion. I will follow her orders when the sun is in question. We will negotiate for many things in between, like your exact status. I expect a high level of performance from my mares and I give them the freedom and support they need to achieve it. Right now I have some very serious stallion matters to attend to. Swift, he had guns. Crappy non-functional guns but guns nonetheless.”

Steel and Shining are right where I left them, questioning Blueblood’s seconds. As I walk up to them, I recognize them from the Assayer’s memories.

“Well, hello there amateur miners. I’ve been wanting to meet you. Did you hear the offer I made to the demon? It’s open to you, briefly.”

“You have to let us go. We don’t know anything and you can’t blame seconds for the combatant's actions.”

“I’m not blaming you for anything the demon did. I’m holding you for trial in the death of a Night Guard Captain and the attempted assassination of a member of the Royal Herd. We have all the witnesses and Princesses we need standing right here in plain sight. I can have you tried and sentence executed in ten minutes. Do you know anything yet?”

“We’re not going to tell you anything no matter what you do.”

“You wanna bet? AJ, I need you over here for a minute. AJ is an Earth pony but she has magic way stronger than yours. She is going to tell me if you know anything or not and if she says you do, I will rip it out of your mind.”

“That’s not possible. Earth ponies don’t have magic.”

“Do you have even a clue how stupid you are? I’m an Earth pony. You feel like going a round with me for funsies? Please?”

I lean over him and put on my best ‘you look like lunch’ grin. AJ walks up just in time to catch him losing his piss.

“Not again, John. At least he doesn’t smell as bad as the Minotaur.”

“AJ, put your special focus on him and lets see if we can find out what he knows. Okay, smartass, do you know what those tubes that Blueblood fired at me are?”

It turns out that he really can’t answer. We can infer that he knows something because he can’t deny it and he can’t answer it either one. My best guess is that the demon put some kind of compulsion on him. I’m going to let Twilight study this one for a while.

“Steel, lock them up good and watch them. I’m not going to jump headfirst into demon magic when Swift and Civil may have the answer in a few days anyway.”

Celestia and Luna are standing side by side looking at the mares in the barn. I slip up behind them and wedge my way between them. Before they can react I wrap my wings around them and hug them tight.

“I want to thank you two for backing me. It’s been a real educational experience and I’m sure it isn’t over yet but all I want right now is to go home and enjoy being with the ponies I love for a little while.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Six )

I’m coming down from the adrenalin and anger of mortal combat with a demon. I look back and realize how much skill and how much luck went into my victory. The proportion is frightening. I need something calm and ordinary.

“AJ, I think, in the interest of good manners and public relations, that I best stop by Ponyville and apologize for breaking windows. I should probably pay for them too. I’ll just fly there and teleport back to pick you up.”

AJ is concerned, “How many times have you teleported?”

“Counting this time, five. This will be the longest too.”

“I think I’ll ride with Twilight.”

“Chicken.”

“Smart.”

Twilight is ready to leave and shows me the location of the Town Square. We pop in and the place is deserted. There is some broken glass and minor damage but not a pony to be seen.

“Well. . . The Weather Office is our next stop anyway so let’s ask them where everypony is.”

We can hear the answer before we see it. Rounding the corner we see solid ponies filling the streets around the weather office. They’re all mad about something.

Twilight looks at me, “You’re own your own, big colt.”

I go back up the street a little and levitate to get above the buildings. There I spread my wings and sweep a few times. Circling the Weather Office I aim for a landing on the platform on the top of the building. I can’t, it’s too crowded and no pony is moving. I circle and build some speed, coming in hot this time. At the last second I cup and sweep hard. I’m controlling my altitude with levitation so there’s no danger of a crash but several ponies are blown against the railing leaving me enough room for a vertical landing.

A very excited Rainbow Dash comes running up, “What do you mean coming in hard like that? You could have crashed and hurt somepony!”

I smile, “What do you mean getting so distracted that you don’t even notice a giant economy sized Alicorn hovering just over your head? Given that I’ve come to rescue you, you might want to work on the manners a little.”

I walk over to the rail and look down on the crowd.

“Your attention please, Mares and Stallions.”

They’re still waving and hollering.

A little louder, “Attention Please!”

No change.

I turn it up to full volume, “QUIET!”

You could hear a pin drop.

“Thank you. I believe you are here because of damage to your homes and properties in Ponyville caused by a large sonic boom. I apologize for that. A demon had taken one of the Royal Mares captive and I was on my way to battle the demon. The last time I saw him he was burning up in the sun so that part of it worked out rather well. I will authorize the bank in Ponyville to pay every receipt for repairs submitted. It is well worth it to get my mare back whole and happy. Please tell your friends and neighbors that aren’t here right now. Thank you.”

I step back from the railing and Rainbow looks at me, “You can’t be serious. What really happened?”

I look back, “Twilight and AJ are right over there behind that building. You can ask them.”

She won’t give it up, “No, it isn’t possible for an Alicorn to break the sound barrier. That would be like winning a race pulling a freight wagon.”

I am getting a little tired of the lack of manners and being contradicted.

“Rainbow, have you looked at the damage? I was way supersonic when I went by here.”

Rainbow is determined, “No, it just isn’t possible for anypony with that much wing to get near supersonic. It would tear them off.”

“His Majesty John Sampson hereby challenges Rainbow Dash to a race to determine once and for all who is the fastest flier.”

“What? What did you say?”

“It’s a race, child. I’ll bet you can’t even keep up with me. What would you care to lose in a bet.”

“How about if I win you have to come work for me for a day?”

“And if I win? Because I don’t think it would be fair to my ponies to have you sitting Court for them.’

“How about I come to the Castle and do your wings for you once a week for a month?”

I've got to rub it in, “You sure you’re up to job that big?”

I open my wings to their full spread to emphasize the point.

Rainbow gulped, “Yeh, sure.’

“Where do you want to race to? How about Dodge City and back?”

Rainbow is worried, “That’s a long race.”

“My problem is that I need altitude and isolation or I’m going to break more windows.”

“OK, We’ll start at the railroad track south of Ponyville and go around the tower of the old castle and back. First one to cross the railroad after rounding the tower wins.”

“First to cross the railroad at the starting point, the first bridge south of Ponyville. Who can we get for a judge? Twilight?”

“How about the Wonderbolts?”

“How long will it take to get them here?”

“Maybe fifteen minutes.”

“Hurry.”

I am making side bets when Twilight and AJ come up to see what is taking so long. I explain and . . .

“John, please say you didn’t. That is just cruel.”

“I tried to talk her out of it but she just had to prove something.”

AJ is laughing and my side bets have suddenly dried up.

A few minutes later Rainbow comes back accompanied by a group of very athletic looking Pegasi.

“Your Majesty, Rainbow informs us that you would like us to verify that you are the first supersonic Alicorn.”

I laugh, “Rainbow missed the mark a little. I would think that the damage behind you would represent some kind of evidence but I don’t need anypony’s verification. What I need is a judge for a little bet we have going. It’s a simple race. From the railroad bridge south of Ponyville around the old castle and back. First to complete the course wins. Anypony that thinks they can compete is welcome to join on the same terms as Rainbow. Just one very important detail. Stay out of my way. Anypony as big as me and moving that fast is going to have one hell of a vortex. I don’t want anypony getting hurt for a game.”

“We’ll be glad to fly along with you and verify that you’ve made the course. . . .”

“Damned, does some kind of mental condition run in Pegasi? You can’t keep up with me. Don’t bother trying. I want ponies stationed at the old castle to verify that all contestants make the turn and more at the railroad bridge to record the order that the contestants cross the finish line. Understand?”

“Yes, Your Majesty, but it just isn’t possible for anypony with wings the size of yours to get any great speed. . .”

“I’m tired of this repetitious idiocy. New bet. I’m leaving off the top deck in one minute. Anypony that dreams of competing can be on the platform or in the air. All you have to do is keep up with me for five minutes and you win. Simple and easy.”

That led to lots of discussion and agitated movement. Most go up but to watch or wait I don’t know.

The minute is nearing an end. Standing in the center of the platform, I launch straight up at maximum thrust. I’m sweeping but it’s more for looks than effect. It looks like a swarm of bees pursuing me. Leveling out at altitude, I wait for them to catch up. Soon the whole swarm is buzzing around me. I head south and start sweeping for real. I gain speed quickly but they’re all keeping up. Good. I add in thrust and some of them begin to trail behind me. Cranking up the thrust some more brings me to where the wind begins to hurt so I put up my shield and look around. About half of them are gone. Time to get serious. I tuck and put on more thrust. In a few seconds I feel that bump and the world goes silent. Three of them are still with me. Show time. Full thrust doubles my speed and leaves the Pegasi far behind. I do a loop and come up behind the Pegasi and blow by them. Just to rub it in, I fly a literal ring around them.

Point made, I get in front of them and slow down, eventually dropping all the way to a hover.

“Is there anything else you’d like to see?”

A very subdued Rainbow says, “No, Your Majesty. I just want to know how you do it.”

“It’s the horn, child, the horn. I’m mixing winged flight and high power levitation together.”

One of the other Pegasi says, “I didn’t know you could do that.”

So I fold my wings and just float there in front of them.

I say, “Wings are far more fun and I’d rather just soar. But it is useful to be able to get somewhere in a hurry sometimes and part of the reason I won that battle with the demon was because I made a dramatic enough entrance that most of his helpers ran away. Let’s go back.”

The trip back was subsonic and we actually collected a few dogged pursuers. A crowd was waiting in the air and on the ground.

Rainbow steps out in front of the crowd, “It’s official. I’m going to be doing his wings for the next month. But it’s worth it to see him go by me like I’m sitting still even when I’m supersonic. I’d give anything to see that from his point of view.”

I’m on that, “Did I hear you say ‘anything’?”

Rainbow is confused, “I thought you had to have a horn to do that?”

“You do. But I heard you say you wanted to ‘see’. All you need for ‘see’ is to be a passenger.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You got any of those rescue harnesses? Think one of them might fit me? We could just strap you to my chest and go for a ride. You’d fit within my legs even tucked. That would be important because part of going that fast is a shield to keep the wind under control. Anything outside of the shield will get burned off.”

“Would you really do that for me?”

“It’s what I should have done from the beginning because it’s a lot safer and less antagonistic way of proving the point. Now what’s ‘anything’?”

I ended up getting my wings done once a month for a year as a cumulative prize. It took two harnesses together to fit me but we got it done. Twilight helped with the fitting while AJ looked on laughing.

“AJ, you should take the next ride. It’s a great feeling to be free among the clouds.”

“There’s no earth for the Earth pony so it’s not for me.”

Rainbow’s weight is negligible but I have to be careful walking so I solve the problem by going up the stairs gliding pony. That gets a reaction all by itself. On the platform I wrap Rainbow in my magic and launch straight up with medium thrust.

From underneath me, “Oh yeah. That’s a takeoff.”

“That was not maximum acceleration. I don’t want to risk breaking the straps.”

I climb to altitude with several Pegasi following. Leveling off, I turned south again and start ratcheting up the thrust. I put the shield up and check with Rainbow.

“How’s the wind down there?”

“Not bad. I’d rather feel it though.”

“Not when the speed gets serious, you wouldn’t. We won’t be able to talk at mach so thump my ribs if you have a problem. Ready?”

“Ready!”

I tuck and crank the thrust to high while increasing my personal speed also. The familiar bump passes and I kick even more thrust in. I loop around and blow by our escort just for fun. I lose some altitude and pick up the river going south. The landscape is rushing by at spectacular rate as I follow the twists and turns of the river. When we get south of Appleloosa I turn and follow the Macintosh hills weaving through a couple of peaks. I curve back north around the end of the forest and kick in even more thrust as we head home. The old castle passes in a blink and I start dumping speed over the Everfree. By the time we get to the river we’re subsonic.

“How we doing down there?”

“Wowee! I like this.”

An escort has joined us by the time I sight the landing platform. Twilight is waiting and unbuckles Rainbow.

Rainbow is wound tight, “We flew the length of the Macintosh hills in seconds! Wow, this stallion is fast!”

I’m grinning, “Congratulations, Rainbow, you can now tell everypony that you are the first Pegasus to go for a hypersonic bellyride on the Royal Stallion. I might take others later but right now, I need food. I’ve burned a lot of energy today and I might hurt anypony that gets between me and food.”

Twilight asks, “How would you feel about a hayburger?”

I respond, “Very annoyed. Make it a dozen and I might calm down.”

We stop at the bank first and I get them lined up on paying damage claims. Some of them had been at the ‘gathering’ anyway but I want to make it official. After the three of us order fifteen hayburgers, the filly taking the order asks how long before the rest of our party arrives. I tell her that demon killing makes Alicorns really hungry so she has to go talk to her boss. I order six more after those are gone and she looks under the table to see if I am hiding any. The world has officially returned to normal.

“Mares, I am ready to go home. I need my band.”

Twilight shows me the location for our tower and we go there. Cadance and Shining are already there.

Spike says, “About time. Swift sent word she would be here with Civil as soon as she can get some Guard to watch all the mares in your old barn.”

I wrap everypony into one big wing hug.

I’m thinking about crying, “It is so good to be home with my herd and not have to worry about what may happen next.”

Wouldn’t you know, about then Swift and Civil pop in so I pull them into the herd hug.

“Swift, honey, I’m sorry for throwing you back into the work so fast but so many things have been happening.”

Swift smiles up at me, “You did exactly the right thing, John. After being a slave the best thing that could happen was to be back in control. We’ll have to go inspect all the mares tomorrow. I think a bunch of them will do nicely in the Guard.”

Yes! My Swift is back, “I was hoping for that. It’ll make life a lot easier in a hurry.”

Civil spoke up, “I guess it’s safe for me to go home now.”

I turn to AJ, “What do you think of that?”

AJ replies, “To get some personal items?”

Facing Swift, “How about you?

Swift is blunt, “Hell yes.”

“Cadance, you’ve spent some time. . .”

Cadance is measured, “Not enough for a final decision but more than enough for an invitation. Yes.”

“Civil, you can always sleep anywhere you feel comfortable. Just understand that our nightly pile is on that list. You can live here or in any of the many places we own without reservation but we would be happiest if you would stay with our herd and band.”

Civil is crying, “John, I’ve lived for years with the ‘Noble Herds’ and you cannot imagine how different your herd is. Hell no I’m not going anywhere else.”

We have a random dinner because some of us have eaten already and some have not and I just want more. Sleeping takes organization. I get in the center of the pad and raise my wings. AJ nestles against my right side and Civil against my left. Twilight is next to AJ and extends her wing across my back. Cadance is next to Civil with Shining on her other side. She covers Shining with one wing and extends the other to meet Twilight’s wing over my back. Finally, Swift nestles against my chest and I curve my wings over the entire pile until the tips meet over Swift. Then I rest my cheek on Swift’s back. My herd is secure and I will protect them.

We are seated in Luna’s kitchen but something seems off about it. Oh, there’s no shadows so this is a dream.

“Hello, Luna. How are we doing tonight?”

“We be disturbed, Friend John. I worried about thou after the battle with the demon and tonight some of my worries seem justified.”

“It’s a stallion thing. After any battle there is a period of second guesses and what ifs that must be waded through.”

“My Dear Friend John, I am the Princess of Dreams. How could thou imagine that I might not know the nightmares of warriors.”

“The only real concern that I have is that I may have killed an innocent pony. I never even knew that a demon was possible until after Blueblood was dead. He might have been as much a victim as any of the mares.”

“Save thy concerns for somepony worthy. It be not possible to be both innocent and victim of a demon. A demon cannot force a pony to act against their essential nature. Blueblood had to welcome the demon at some point.”

“That’s good to know. I need to learn more about demons just in case. Hell, I need to learn more about everything.”

“Worry not Friend John. Thou hast many that love thou and will help thou. I must go now but I will see thou in the morrow.”

A small familiar voice is saying, “Zero four hundred, John.”

I raise my head and look. Yep, it’s Spike in the door. Straightening my wings a bit, I expose Swift and rub my cheek down her back and side. This is how life is meant to be. I have all the warm furry love around me that I could desire.

Swift says, “I’m awake, John.”

“I know but I just want as much of your scent as I can get. I missed you.”

“Let me up and we can go get tea.”

I lift my head and Swift slides off and heads for the door. I rise and lift my wings, walking carefully out of the pile. Toilet first then kitchen.

“Hello, Spike. I’ve been missing your tea.”

“Hello, John. I’ve been hearing stories about you.”

“If they’re funny ones, tell everypony else.”

Swift is scandalized, “Don’t encourage him. He was just telling how his sire can scare the crap out of a Minotaur with a look.”

“Oh well, then whatever you do, don’t tell him about the pissing Unicorn.”

Swift isn’t going easy, “What pissing Unicorn. I didn’t see a pissing Unicorn.”

I just grin, “I bet AJ did.”

My evil deed for the day done, we could get down to business.

“We want to find three good executive assistants and as many secretary/clerks as we can get. We’ll start with the mares though we may have to pull them from the bank or other businesses. We can also sort out some farm mares and leave them with Granny. How many do you think are Guard material?”

“I’d bet on fifteen but you’ll probably want some of them for clerks and I think two might make assistants. Who are the lucky recipients of the executive assistants?”

“Civil, you, and me.”

“You have me.”

You’ve been promoted, Darling.”

“What if I don’t want the promotion?”

“Don’t worry, you do. You’re lead for all of the non Alicorn mares in Canterlot. AJ leads the farm and Celestia leads the Alicorn mares.”

“John, I’m not sure I want to be trying to keep up appearances with a bunch of high society mares.”

“Swift, my love, they have to measure up to your standards. That’s why I want you as lead. If they think eye candy is enough to be one of my mares, you go all military on them. My goal is to eliminate the deadwood, send them to another stallion or retire them. You are now the number one mare in Canterlot outside of the Castle.”

Swift is adjusting, “But I don’t have to live with them?”

“You can live anywhere you want and play with anypony you want as long as you come home to me and bear my foals. The more you come home to me the happier I’ll be but the hard truth is that I have obligations to AJ, Twilight, Luna, and Celestia that cannot be ignored. The good news is that now I have the transportation to come home no matter how far away duty takes me.”

“John, I really liked our pile last night. I want to be part of that every time I possibly can.”

“So do I. It’s why I’m alive.”

“And me too. So I’ll help you deal with the politics and snobbery any way I can.” Civil has come in, in the middle of my conversation with Swift.

“You two are going to be together at least until all the changeovers are done. Swift is not only my lead mare, she’s a Royal representative and Guard. If anypony gets shitty, she can handle it herself, make arrests, or call down the wrath of Prince and Princess without question.”

Swift is nervous, “John, I’m not sure I want that kind of power.”

“I know, Honey. That’s why I’m giving it to you. The power already exists. Somepony will wield it. I trust you with it because you don’t want it for yourself. How do you think I got into this madness?”

Civil comes around the table and hugs me.

“Not that I’m mad or anything but what was that for?”

Civil smiles. “I’m beginning to understand you.”

Of course Twilight and AJ walk in right at this moment.

Twilight exclaims, “Hey, if there are going to be any test rides, we have to watch.”

“We’re heading out to the farm today. The only problem is that absolutely nothing will get done if we go romping in the pasture.”

Civil looks lost, “Wait a minute. You ponies are Royal with a whole Castle to play in and you go outdoors in a pasture for fun?”

I put on my best hurt look, “Civil, Darling, you can’t believe all the restrictions they put on me. I’ve already told you about soundproofing. Would you believe that I’m not allowed to play with Luna at night? So the only way to have real uninhibited fun is to get far away from everypony else. The chase is really fun too.”

Twilight isn’t sympathetic, “Don’t let him fool you. The Luna rule is because Celestia got woke up to find out why the stars were wobbling. But he’s right, the chase is half the fun. And I hear he has a date to go cloud dancing with Luna.”

“I’ve got a date to go to flight school with you. You need to be up on this supersonic Alicorn technique.”

We go to a normal breakfast then ‘port to the farm. Twilight gave me a bunch of locations so I can get around better now. AJ still doesn’t want to ride with me.

My old barn home is packed with mares. It’s a mixed herd but with a heavy preference for Unicorns. I’m levitating to about double height as I address them.

“Your attention please, I am Prince Major John Sampson, the Royal Herd Stallion and maybe your stallion. On my right is Duchess Captain Swift Trail, Royal Mare and possibly your Lead Mare.”

“Earth ponies can’t lead Unicorns,” from the herd.

“I see we are going to need a special group. Anypony that agrees with that please move over by the door.”

Eight mares went to the door.

I grin, “Anypony else? Be very sure.”

One more went.

I smiled big for this one, “Very good. Now I have a revelation for you. I’m an Earth pony. You may use that door and go anywhere you want.”

“Are you throwing us out?”

“Nope. You just declined the invitation to join my herd. No mare will be forced to do anything. What the rest of you have is an opportunity to apply for inclusion in my herd. You will be expected to work for the good of the herd and contribute more than just a warm body. Anypony that can’t or won’t work doesn’t need to hang around. On my left is Counselor Civil Hassler, manager for all the former Blueblood properties.

“Do we have any farm fillies here?”

We have five.

“How would you like to stay on this farm? This is Sweet Apple Acres, the largest apple farm in Equestria. If you stay here your lead will be Applejack, an Earth pony Royal Mare and Element Bearer.’

They all like the idea.

“Please wait in the corner over there.”

They all go there.

“Alright, do we have any management or secretarial staff here?”

A young Unicorn mare steps forward, “I was a branch manager for the bank. Civil Hassler should know me.”

Civil nods, “I do. How did you end up in here?”

She replies, “I complained about an established account disappearing and about thirty minutes later I was ordered to report for reassignment and didn’t find out that meant to brood mare until I was in the corral.”

I smiled big at that, “Consider that as proof that you are smarter than your former boss was. I was inquiring about some irregularities as a Royal investigator and inquired about my own account. That’s the established account that vanished. Civil, who do you think she fits best with?”

“She’s a pro and will work with anypony honest. Her name is Almost Rich. Swift needs her most.”

Do you prefer ‘Almost’ or ‘Rich’?”

“I’d rather be ‘Rich’.”

“Come on over here and get to know us before we decide.”

I let the mares work it out while I moved on.

“How many would be interested in a career in the Royal Guard?”

Eight step forward. All look young and healthy.

“Go wait with the farm fillies for now.”

That left five. I drop to the floor to get a better look at them. All look both haughty and delicate.

I choose one, “What’s your education?”

“I am Noble. I have been tutored by the best in charm and etiquette.”

All five are the same.

“What do you expect from me?”

Their spokesmare says, “We expect to be covered and kept in comfort while we bear you magnificent foals.”

“I don’t see a four band horn among you. None of you have the physical strength of a healthy foal. What can any of you do besides just stand there and get fucked?”

I should have known. That confused them.

“It takes two good lines to make one good foal. You are far too weak. Do any of you have a herd to go home to?”

They all managed to come up with somepony that would take them in which saves me a hard choice.

“Swift, you mares ready to go back to Canterlot?”

“Any time you are.”

“Good. Guardponies, raise you right front hoof. Repeat after me. I do hereby solemnly swear to beat the crap out of anypony that annoys Duchess Swift Trail.”

They all do.

“Congratulations. You are temporarily assigned to Prince John’s Royal Guard and will assist Duchess Swift in transporting the rejected mares to their destinations.

“Swift, drop the farm fillies with Granny on the way by the house then stop at the bank and draw enough bits to cover a weeks average food and lodging for each of the fourteen rejected mares. Give them the money and a rail ticket, one way, to anywhere in Equestria they desire. End by delivering the new Guardponies to Steel for training. I’ll get the list of names and cuties from you later. Civil and I are going to pay a call on the snake den.”

We left Swift with her new assistant and Guard squad. I had a quick stop to make locally.

“We’re going to say hello to Fred. Fred hasn’t seen me like this so his reaction should be priceless.”

We are walking toward the house when I spot Fred grazing in a field.

“That’s him over there. I’m sure you’ll notice the resemblance. That’s because my first equine body was a gift from Fred and I just like the colors.”

I took off and swung high to come back and hover over Fred.

“Hi, Fred.”

“How do you like the new look?”

I dropped down and hovered in front of him.

“Smartass. Think hard about this. I could give you part of this for your own use.”

“Because you could talk like everypony else instead of just mentally. You could talk to everypony else.”

“I know, Fred. But if something happens to me you would lose the chance forever. I want you to be happy even without me.”

“Thank you, Fred. I owe you now and forever.”

Fred bounces off across the pasture at that so I go back to Civil and we teleport to my apartment in the Guard sector. Civil rides with me so I finally got to bust that cherry. Steel is in his office and I explain what I have in mind. We walk out of the Castle and down to the front door of the bank to give Steel’s Guardponies time to get in place.

When we walk in the front door of the bank, everything stops. I do mean everything, noise, movement, everything.

I say, “We all know your CEO is permanently out of town so show me who’s in charge right now.”

There were some furtive movements in the back but not much else. On a hunch, I put a clear shield across the back door.

“Anypony can grow a brain and cooperate at any time. Until then everypony in this room can line up right here for inspection.”

“We don’t have to do that!”

“Do you know just how far out of town your ex boss is? I personally stuffed him into the sun. Yeh, I can do things like that, just like Celestia. The difference is that I have balls. I’m meaner. Now line up or I’ll line you up.”

Two of them make a break for the back door and hit with a solid ‘thud’. I scoop one up in each ‘hand’ and float them over to me. Then I realize they have a familiar cold slimy feel.

“Civil, please teleport to Colonel Steel and tell him to send some Guardponies to take charge of the prisoners.”

“But, Your . .”

“Now! Mare.”

As soon as she pops out they all stand up. I crank up max speed and strength then teleport both of the ones I have a hold of to the sun. The rest start toward me. I put a hard spherical shield around myself and start grabbing them and sending them to the sun. More are coming out of the back offices. They are weakening me whenever they can touch anything of mine, including my magic, and I can’t send them all out fast enough. It’s a long shot by why not? I open a continuous teleport to the sun and start shoving them into it. I hope help gets here soon. I’m down to four when suddenly everything gets very bright. The sun has come to me. Good. I may not survive but they damned sure won’t. I welcome the sun as I fade from consciousness.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Seven )

I am standing on the familiar white floor. Celestia is with me and we are admiring my memories all neatly lined up on the horizon.

“You’re right, John. This new system is better. Now can you show me what happened?”

I select for order by time, latest first and there are several that I don’t want to look at for some reason then the bank. I start with leaving Steel’s office and play it through until I lose consciousness.

“It was a nest of demons. Every damned one of them was demon. I pushed eighteen into the sun before you arrived and toasted the last four.”

“That wasn’t me, John. We’re having this conversation so we can find out who it was. What exactly were you thinking?”

“The instant I realized what they were, I sent Civil out of there. They must have realized that I had identified them because they all charged me. I started grabbing them and tossing them into the sun from behind a shield but I figured out that they were sucking energy right out of me faster than I could get rid of them. I modified the teleport spell to keep it open continuously so I could shove them into it faster and be done with them. It was working but I had lost too much before I tried that. I could see that I wasn’t going to last long enough to get the last of them and I wished help would come. That’s when the sun came down the teleport and fried them. I didn’t know if it was going to fry me or not but I didn’t care. I welcomed the sun because it fried them for certain. I was hoping you had enough control to spare me.”

“John, that wasn’t me. Whatever happened in there, it was all you. I felt a disturbance in the sun and came as fast as I could but when I got there you were laying there alone in the bottom of a smoking crater. I had to lift you out because it was so hot that nopony could get near the hole.

“Celestia, there are sure to be more of them. I realize now what the tendril was trailing behind Blueblood when we fed him into the sun. He was in communication with the nest so they knew what I was there for. They’ve had generations to infiltrate and take over herds. We’ve got to have a way to detect them. I recognized them when I grasped them in my magic. They feel slimy and cold. Until then all I knew was that they hated me.”

“Twilight is working on a way to detect them remotely. Steel, Civil, AJ, and Swift are tracing all of the Blueblood herd holdings. Luna and I are watching them carefully. If they turn up another nest we are going to blast first and ask questions later. You have a lot of healing to do. Just save your strength for that. We will all visit you when we can.”

She is gone but I feel better. No matter what else, I have eradicated that nest and gone a long way to making Equestria safe.

“Finally! Doesn’t anypony in this place ever talk to patients? They give me fruit juice every once and a while but I need protein. Give me broth or meat.”

Twilight is with me on my favorite white floor.

“What are you talking about, John? Celestia was here this morning. You’re right about getting fruit juice. They tell me you need it to keep up your energy but you are getting it nearly continuously. They want me to ask you why you need so much.”

“Twilight, from my point of view Celestia was here last week. I was in high speed mode when I lost consciousness and I guess I must still be. Let me see what I can do about it.”

I told my speed and strength to return to normal and suddenly felt better.

“Twilight, I think that was it. I feel better now.”

“Good. Alicorns have spectacular healing so you should get better quickly. I’ll tell them about the broth and be right back.”

We are in Luna’s kitchen drinking tea and talking.

“How art thou feeling today, Friend John?”

Luna seems concerned for some reason. Then I realize, no shadows.

“Weak, my Darling Luna, weak. How long have I been asleep?”

“Two days, Friend John. They have asked me to check on thou. Thou needs to awaken and take nourishment. They told me to tell thou ‘broth awaits’.”

“Let’s try it.”

It’s dark but I can feel something touching my mouth. I bite and I’m rewarded with the taste of meat. This is good stuff, closer to pureed meat than soup.

Luna joins me on my white floor.

“I be instructed to tell thou that thou will get more later but they wish to start slowly lest thy stomach become upset.”

“Has anypony explained to them that I am an Alicorn with extremely high energy usage. I eat five normal portions per meal. They can stick a tube down my throat and pump it in if they want.”

“They will be advised, My Stallion.”

“And Luna, tell them to give me room. Do not tie me to the bed or put rails around me. I have an option other ponies don’t. If I can get up enough strength, I will change bodies then I can edit or reload this one to fix it.”

“That would be most wonderful, Friend John. I will warn them of this also. But be thou most careful. Thy injury be as much to thy magic as body.”

They did give me a bunch more meat and fruit. That helped a lot. Maybe I can even talk them into some tea.

Eat, sleep, repeat. I feel the strength slowly returning to my body. I still can’t see or hear but I can twitch in places. My image list is complete and I can see no damage so if I can make a switch,I should be cured. I choose my inner pony and step into him.

“AHHHHH!”

I switch back as fast as I can. The pain is incredible but I made a noise and I heard it. There are many good possibilities here.

Luna has just arrived on my white floor.

“Friend John, what has happened? The nurse said thou screamed.”

“I switched to my inner pony and the switch was successful but the pain is unbelievable so I switched back.

“It be evident that something has happened. Thy bandages be much disturbed.”

“Luna, get the alleged doctor in here and tell him to remove all of the bandages.”

Luna disappears for several minutes while I fume quietly.

“Friend John, the doctor says thy wounds must remain bound to prevent loss of thy blood.”

“Luna, please tell the educated idiot that less than one second after someone tells me there are no bandages, there will be no wounds.”

Luna is gone for a while this time.

“Thy body is clear, Friend John.”

I switch to inner pony and suddenly life is wonderful.

“Hello world! Damned it’s good to be back.”

“I be very happy for thou, My Wonderful Stallion.”

I look seriously at the doctor, “Stand by. I’m going to try to go back to Alicorn. My internal image looks undamaged but changing an injured body is new territory for me.”

I switch to A-Pony and wham! Everything is back but I can hardly hold my head up.

“Bring me food! Now! The pain is gone, everything works, but I’m not sure I have enough strength left over to stand.”

Two big bowls of fruit went buy in a few minutes.

“Bring me eggs, fish, chicken, oatmeal, potatoes, carrots!”

I am told that there was a party in the kitchen when my order came in. They knew I was back. Of course, the inevitable followed. All that food wanted back out. I’m still shaky but gliding pony can carry most of my weight so I made it. The nurses are mad at me but that just makes us even. They won’t tell me how long I was out of it. Swift, AJ, and Civil walk in and life is better. I’m buried in cheek rubs and hugs.

“One of you can tell me, how long have I been locked up in here?”

Swift answers, “Several weeks.”

“How many several?”

Swift is gentle, “About five. You kept getting excited and fighting with things we can’t see.”

“I couldn’t see them either, Darling. I just felt them and knew it was them or all of us.”

AJ smiles at me, “The farm fillies are doing well other than Big Mac has trouble walking when they’re around.”

“Tell Big Mac he has my blessing and encouragement to steal as many of them as he thinks he can stand.”

AJ likes that idea, “Two of them have been teasing him mercilessly. This could be fun to watch.”

Civil is looking serious, “You knew, didn’t you?”

“Yes. About one second after I picked the two up, I recognized the feeling. When I sent you out, they knew I knew and the battle was on.”

She’s clouding up, “You almost gave your life to save mine, didn’t you?”

“Nope, I sent you to get help to save my life. The sun thing was unexpected.”

AJ says, “Steel wants to talk to you when you’re up to it.”

“And I want to talk to him. I want to know what was in the bottom of that hole.”

Swift answers, “I know that one. The rest of the nest. When the sun fire bored through the building it probably killed thirty more.”

“Have you guys found any more nests?”

Swift says, “No but a bunch of noble leaders have vanished. Steel thinks they have left Equestria to build their numbers back up before they can try again.”

“I don’t think it’s going to be that easy. Celestia spoke of hunting them down once before. Now they’ve got two extra heavy duty Alicorns after them. Coming back would be an uphill battle.”

We visit a while then I have to go to the toilet again. This time I walk without magic assistance. I start walking the halls to build my endurance. Passing an open door to a courtyard, I decide that some sun would do me good. Walking out, I look up to feel joy and comfort, and strength flooding my body. I just stand there loving it.

“Your Majesty! You shouldn’t be out here.”

I whirl, “Wrong. This is where I should have been all along. Tell the doctor I am checking out.”

It doesn’t take long at all. I don’t just feel good, I look better than ever. I look like a sun god in his prime. Celestia has some explaining to do.

She is waiting for me in her kitchen. Apparently somepony from the hospital alerted her.

She can’t meet my eyes.

“You knew. Me lying there dying for a month and you knew. Give me a reason.”

“John, do you know how many ponies have raised the sun over the years? Hundreds, maybe even thousands. You know how I got the job? They all died.”

“You are not making sense, Celestia. It was walking out in the sun that gave me my strength back. And you have told me yourself that I would help you with the job.”

“It burned them out, John. It gave them more than they could stand. I wanted to build you up to peak strength before I exposed you to the power of the sun.”

“So you feared that in my weakened state I would be unable to control the energy and burn up?”

She nodded.

“Celestia, the sun and I made our peace when the demons were mobbing me. I said it could have my life as long as it killed all the demons and I was comfortably watching demons burn when I passed out. I’ll bet good money that it was the hot ruble that cooked me.”

“I think you got really lucky, John. Just walking into a nest of demons like that and surviving is amazing.”

“I had help. That’s when the sun came, when I wished for help. I thought it was you but now I understand. If I had asked for help sooner, I wouldn’t have a scratch on me.”

“Spend some time catching up, John. Get used to your new status. We’ll get your clock started one day soon. And be sure to see Luna. She was frantic until you talked to her.”

“Can you confirm for me that there was more nest under the bank?”

“There was. I guess your first impression of their basement was better than we knew.”

“It also explains why the sun kept going through the building after the four I saw were toast. Now just explain to me how the sun knew they were down there.”

I want to see Steel next. There are a lot of loose ends dangling.

“Whoa! John, I love the new look. Did you get the whole package?”

“And then some. The sun and I have made a deal. Now all you have to do is find me some demons. Do we have a count on the outstanding?”

“Yes and no. We have a list of missing and we have a shorter list of seen after the bank battle and now missing. There was a lot of overdone meat in the bank basement and no way to guess how much of it might have formerly been one of the missing. At least twenty six are on the run.”

“I don’t think they’re on the run. Steel, he brought guns to the challenge. They don’t understand guns so theirs didn’t work but sooner or later they will figure out a way. He would have won that challenge if they had known one more little thing.”

“John, you’re scaring me.”

“Good. Because demons with guns loose in Equestria is the absolute worst case scenario.”

“You know about guns. What’s the defense?”

“Shoot first.”

“That’s it? Kill them first?”

“Equestria is millennia from being able to produce materials that will stop bullets and weigh less than the pony wearing them. The good news is that they are trying to copy my guns. Equestria is nearly that far from being able to produce the metals and precision needed to make them work. We need to thoroughly investigate all the high level metalsmiths. They have figured out by now that they need more than what they have and that’s where they’ll get it.”

“Can you give me anything specific?”

“The tube has to be perfectly sized from end to end and perfectly straight. Think of it like a survey. How big an error does it take to miss a pony sized target when you extend a half yard long line out to a hundred yards? And they need a lot more velocity. That means more pressure. Their tubes will have to get much thicker. You will probably find some injuries or deaths from exploding tubes when they experiment.”

“Those sound like a good start. There won’t be many ponies capable of that kind of work and the injuries should be different from anything else.”

“How are my new recruit/mares doing?”

“Mostly about average but you got one that’s going to be stellar, if she survives.”

“Good, How about Swift? I intended to be helping her with her promotion but life happened.”

“She’s using your old office and has turned some of the apartment into another office. She has two Unicorn helpers and they are scary efficient. She may have my job next year.”

“I’ve been trying to think of a good way to promote her in the Guard to match her Herd status.”

“Just tell my clerk and it will be done.”

“You’re her Commanding Officer. Doesn’t it have to go through you?”

“John, you’re my Commanding Officer. You can promote her just like Celestia did.”

“Steel, I didn’t grow up in Equestria so I bump into nuances that other ponies take for granted. I value our friendship enough to make damned sure I don’t bump into any of yours. So keep humoring me when I ask silly questions. It’s a kindness I appreciate.”

“I’ll take care of it. That way nopony can claim you’re favoring your own mare. Shall we say, Major?”

“Just what I was thinking. I might even talk one of those Unicorns into something.”

My next stop is Luna. She’s sitting in her main room just staring at the wall.

“I guess your spies aren’t as good as Celestia’s. She . . .”

I am hit by a large high velocity Alicorn.

“Darling John! Thou hast come through thy ordeal stronger than ever.”

“I’ve learned some things, My Darling Luna. I think I have come into my full powers now. I have more help than I imagined and I have love. What more could a stallion ask for?”

Luna is showing me the answer.

“Luna, Darling, I’m shocked. Here I am, an invalid barely minutes out of my hospital bed, and you want to drain my strength.”

Luna giggles, “That be not exactly my desire. I be very happy to see thou hale and hearty. We must find a time to celebrate soon.”

I agree, “Yes, we must. Perhaps some cloudy morning right after sun raising. We could spend a day dancing across Equestria.”

Luna says dreamily, “It would be a sight long overdue.”

“And coming closer every day. . .

“Luna, I wish you would join our pile occasionally. You need the connection and we all want you to be happy. The times can be worked out. When I relieve you and Celestia more often and foals come into the picture, it will be necessary. Why not get started now?”

“Friend John, thou knows that I can't neglect my nightly duties.”

“And nopony would ask you to. I have come to you during the day. Others could come with me or alone. I could tend your moon for a night to give you rest. Mostly you need to be less isolated.”

“I be forced to admit that I be never so rested as in thy embrace. Perhaps thy might bring a few Friends on thy days with me.”

“I believe I will do that, Friend Luna. And now I have a question. Do you know a way to find demons without having to touch them? Could your moon feel their presence?”

“I know of no way, Friend John, but I have never asked my moon. I will do so this very night. Perhaps Twilight might be more knowledgeable.”

“I will have to ask her soon. There is one other question that you might help me with. How many ponies have helped Celestia raise the sun?”

“None, Friend John. Many raised it before Celestia but they all died young. Thou art the first she has considered able to try. I fear its power. I be both proud and afraid seeing thou hast undertaken to harness it.”

“I thank you for your love and concern. You have given me much to think about. Good day, Friend Luna.”

It’s a short stroll down the hall to Twilight’s tower. I guess I’m going to go back to calling it that now that I have become an inhabitant of the entire Castle. Twilight is in the second floor library with a large stack of books I’ve never seen before.

“Hello Twilight.”

“Joh. . . . John, what have you done?”

“I’m happy to see you too, Twilight. What I’ve done is battle something close to fifty demons and live to tell about it. There is a price to pay, though.”

“I can see there have been some changes. How did this happen?”

“I gave my life to the sun in return for protecting Equestria from the demons. They were overwhelming me and I had no chance of killing all of them so I asked for help and got it. This seems to my reward for embracing the sun.”

“Then why did the sun burn you?”

“The sun didn’t. I was standing in the sunfire watching it burn the demons off of me with no discomfort. But I passed out while it was boring through the building into the nest below. I lost my shield against the hot rubble. All I had to do to get my full health back and then some was to walk out into the sunlight.”

“How is Celestia taking it?”

“I’m afraid I scared her earlier. When I stepped out into the sun and went from barely able to walk to this in an instant, I was pissed. Why didn’t somepony just wheel me out to the courtyard a month ago? I confronted Celestia and she admitted knowing at least from when I explained how I asked the sun for help. She explained her fears to me and I accept them as valid. But I haven’t forgiven her for not letting me make the decision. We are going to spend tonight working that out whether she wants to or not.”

“John, sometimes you scare me when you talk about Celestia like that.”

“Twilight, remember that I was made to order. Celestia summoned a stallion to be her helper and mate. Since when is the stallion weaker than his mares? Expect fireworks. They’re certainly long overdue.”

“Please try not to wreck Canterlot.”

“I won’t. Wreck Canterlot, that is. Meanwhile, how can I find some demons to burn?”

“I haven’t worked that out yet. The best idea so far is a requirement for regular hugs by known clean ponies but they’ll just hide from that.”

“Well, I have one clue for you. The sun knows. I didn’t know there was more nest below the basement until the sun went after them. I just said ‘kill them all’. I’m going to work on that myself but there is something that signals their presence.”

“That is useful information. That means that they show through solid rock and great distances. That limits the choices.”

“Good. You want to take a break and have some fun? I’m going to see Swift next and tell her she got promoted.”

“Oh hell yes. She has earned it. When you put her, Civil, and Rich together you made something wonderful. Those three could wind up running Equestria.”

Luckily, all three were in when we got to my old office. Or was it luck? They seemed to already know I was out of the hospital and making my rounds.

“Hello my Wonderful Swift. And Civil. And Rich. I’ve been hearing stories about you three. Steel thinks you’re out for his job and he has some paperwork for you. I just wanted to check in and get some of my old stuff out of the way.

Swift says, “We’re making pretty good progress on finding all of Blueblood’s old bank accounts despite some asshole blowing the main bank to pieces. We’ve got a long list of all the properties. You know by now that all the mares you decided to keep are doing well or better. The only problem we haven’t solved is how to find demons.”

“Have you done anything with the leftovers of the bank building?”

“Not yet. We have a contamination problem so it’s roped off and waiting.”

“Okay. Expand the barriers as far as you can. Block streets as long as you don’t block anypony’s access. Get a heavy demolition crew in place and tell me when you’re ready. I’ll take care the decontamination personally.”

“John, there’s been no opposition. All of the Nobles that we expected opposition from have vanished. They’re all on Steel’s demon list. If you need money there’s millions sitting around waiting for a purpose. It’s like demons hoard the dragon way.”

I have been sorting out some clothes and personal effects and stowing them in my ‘pocket’ while we talked. When I get to my old Major’s brassards I take them out and pass them to Swift.

“Here, keep these. Show them to Steel when he brings the paperwork."

“John, don’t you dare play games with me.”

“Why would I dare to do that. Everywhere I go I hear stories of the invincible team. I would never want to get one of them mad at me.”

“John, say it or I’m going to . . . .”

“Congratulations Major Swift Trail. Remember to act surprised when the official notice arrives. I’ll try to make your party but I have a very serious Celestia problem to tackle.”

Twilight giggling through the entire performance was something of a give away but we are all happy and that’s what matters.

I have one more item on the agenda, “Rich, if you were to ask Steel, he could sign you up and I could sponsor you through Officer’s School. Under the circumstances you could get credit for field experience right here and take classes part time. You'll have to pass the tests but I know where to find some really good tutors. We’ll need somepony to take Swift’s job when she takes Steel’s.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Eight )

I have a little time before Celestia lowers the sun. There’s no point in talking to her before then. So I’m going to experiment. I find a comfortable spot in the big courtyard behind the Throne Room and I face the sun.

“We need to talk. You helped me twice now and I owe you. I don’t know that I have anything left to give you but I need a really big favor.”

We have a slow but very informative discussion. It ends when it’s time for the sun to be lowered. I have some decisions to make but first, Celestia. She is still gone to the balcony when I settle in her kitchen to wait.

“Come on in, make yourself comfortable,” I smile, “We have a lot of talking to do.”

Celestia answers, “I’m looking forward to it, John.”

“Hold on to that thought, you’ll need it. We’ve had this conversation before and we thought we had understanding. We didn’t, apparently, because you just did it again. Now I have to make a choice. I can walk away from you. I can adjust you. Or I can accept you. Given how badly you just screwed up, acceptance is off the table. Do you really understand the depth of your mistake?”

“I know you’re upset I left you in the hospital instead of taking a chance on a magic cure.”

“No, Celestia, I’m happy that you value me enough not to take the easy way out caring for me. I’m proud of that. If you had explained it to me back at the beginning just like you explained it to me today I would have probably agreed with you. That’s not the problem. The problem is that you withheld important information about me from me. You could have easily killed me instead of saving me. What do I have to do to fix this problem?”

“I’m not sure we have a problem, John. You just said that you would have made the same decision. You said that last time too.”

“Celestia, I say we have a problem therefore we have a problem. It’s not the decision that went wrong, it’s the withholding. It’s the lack of equity in our relationship. You have failed to realize that by making choices for me, you are endangering me. I cannot accept that in my life.”

“How did I endanger you, John?”

“Just suppose you had been right about the level of energy from the sun overloading me? I would be a grease spot in the hospital courtyard right now. You knew that I had already bonded with the sun. How else did I get saved from the demons? So what do you think I did the very first time I walked under my own power? I headed straight for the open door and the sunshine. It drew me like a magnet. Why not? Nopony had ever mentioned that too much sun might kill me.”

“I sorry, John. I never thought. . .”

“Wrong answer. I don’t care for your apology. And I want you to stop thinking for me. Let me live or die on my own merits.”

“John, you can’t imagine how hard it is taking care of everypony. . . .”

“Wrong answer. I don’t need you to take care of me. You wanted a stallion to be your equal and co-ruler. You got him. Now treat him like an equal or expect trouble."

"Do you really think you are as strong as me, John?"

"In fact, as of today I’m more powerful than you. I can raise and lower the sun without you. Your ponies would rather see me on the Throne. You are no longer the essential pony so you can learn to get along with me or suffer the consequences.”

“So you think you can take me?”

“Have you counted bands lately? Now that the sun and I have reached an agreement I have become exactly what you summoned. Your perfect stallion. That means that I must be stronger than you. That’s the natural order that you screwed up and needed me to fix. Of course I can take you.”

This is going to be interesting. Her eyes are glowing, her horn is fizzling, and she has a wing boner. I put up a soft clear shield just in case.

“Do you really believe that crap, John? You’re beginning to sound like Blueblood.”

“Nope, I’m quoting Celestia. Just look at yourself.”

KaPow! I’m glad I had that shield up. It’s a love tap as bolts go but it would have stung.

“My, that’s an intelligent retort,” I taunt.

BOOM That was not a love tap.

I kick in speed before she can try something else, grab her, and teleport five thousand yards straight up. The instant we get there, I throw a ten yard spherical soft shield around her and hover supporting her with my magic.

Pow! Zap! Bang! She is pissed and she is strong but she’s not getting anywhere.

“Celestia, the rest of the herd knows what I’m doing and why.”

The lights and noises are attracting attention. Pegasi are swarming out of the Palace. The first to reach us hovers in front of me.

“It’s an executive conference, Sergeant. I promised Twilight I wouldn’t let it destroy Canterlot so we moved up here. If there are any questions or concerns take them to Twilight or Luna. Meanwhile please stay well clear. I can’t guarantee the safety of anypony within a thousand yards.”

“Yes, Sir.” Turning around, “You heard His Majesty. Get clear and stay clear.”

There’s still a lot of milling around near the Palace. I guess everypony wants to watch the show. Celestia is beginning to slow down. I doubt she’s run out of anything, she’s just looking for something new to try.

I ask her, “Why didn’t you ask your Guard for help? Because you knew they wouldn’t.”

“John, why don’t you just let me out of here and we can go back to my kitchen and talk in a civilized fashion?”

“Because you aren’t civilized. All of this cage rattling just proves it. What will happen if I drop the shield is that it will get real physical real fast.”

“I’ve been careful to use things that won’t hurt you. I can’t promise that any more.”

“Celestia Darling, the whole purpose of this is for you to give it your best shot. Please try to hurt me.”

It gets louder, a lot louder. My shield is feeding an amazing amount of energy into my reserves after taking a lot off the top for maintenance. She is beginning to look flustered.

“Come on, All Powerful Alicorn Sun Goddess, kick my ass. Teach the upstart alien colt a lesson.”

“Sooner or later you will have to eat or sleep or something. This strong a shield must be draining. I’ll be ready when it drops.”

“Let me start by telling you how wrong you are. I’m not sustaining this shield, you are. It absorbs the energy you have been firing at it and uses it to maintain itself. You’ve probably stored up a month's charge by now.”

WHAM. WHAM. WHAM. Dammit. I bet they felt that in the Crystal Empire. It woke the entire Castle anyway.

“Make that six weeks. You can’t break it, Celestia. The harder you hit it, the stronger it is next time you hit it. You’ve already pushed it way beyond your ability to damage it.”

She is breathing hard and looking like the wrath of hell personified. Time for the next stage. I put a hundred yard soft spherical shield around us and drop the smaller shield between us. I turn my strength up all the way and do something really tricky, I do an Earth pony anchor without actually touching the ground.

“The true limit on this is my boredom. I’m growing weary of holding you up and keeping you from hurting yourself. If you want to stay in this contest, you are going to have to start holding up your end of it.”

I let her slowly down so she takes the hint and uses her wings. She fires another bolt at me and when it goes past me she screams and charges throwing bolts as she comes. I realize that she’s coming at me horn first and catch her in my magic before she can hit me. All of her bolts hit but in anchored Earth pony mode nothing can move me or break me.

“Celestia, dammit. Calm down before you hurt yourself.”

Nope. She’s struggling wildly now. I can’t just turn her loose until she calms down enough to fly herself. Let’s see if her reflexes work. I turn her around until her hindquarters are against my chest and pull her hard against me. Her wings spring up and she freezes in position. There is a wonderful scent in the air that is triggering some of my reflexes. My instincts all scream `YES!’ but when I go for it, nothing happens. I guess it’s not time for that, yet. Pulling myself up her body until my shoulders are against her wings, I pull her head back and cross horns.

RAGE. BETRAYAL. Submission. So I dump on her. I give her all of my love for Equestria and my ponies, for my band and herd, for my friends. Then I give her my pride for their achievements, for Swift as I watch her meet every challenge in her growth from scarred Sergeant to the most powerful mare in civilian Canterlot, for Twilight going from filly with flashes of brilliance to pure brilliance in a few months. And my hopes, for Sweet, for Rich, for Colt, for all the mares freed from Blueblood, for Equestria. Finally, I show her how she looks to me. She’s the anxious hovering mother afraid to let her foals go. She’s the shining goddess stuck in the mud. She’s the great jewel with too high a price.

I separate from her and move her around until we are face to face.

She’s sobbing, “Do I really look that bad to you?”

“Sometimes. You have your moments of great beauty too but that’s not what this intervention is about.”

I drop the shield and teleport us to Celestia’s kitchen setting her right back where she started.

“Celestia, on Terra there is saying, ‘Be careful what you wish for because you may get it.’ You wished for a big, strong, adult stallion that could be the kind of mate a strong mare like you needs. You got him and you just got a taste of what he is capable of. My mate will treat me with respect or I’ll do something about it. Do you understand?”

“No, John, I do not understand. Why are you treating me this way? What is wrong? You just had my full submission and didn’t do a thing with it.”

“I’m your co-ruler, your mate, your herd stallion and still you treat me like a foal. You withhold life critical information. You try to manipulate and control me. That's what's wrong. When we kissed, I dreamed that we finally had something. Now getting you covered is secondary until we have a future.”

"How can we have a future when you reject me?" Celestia's hurt and confusion deepens.

"I've never rejected you. I've been trying to reach you for months but you let me get close then push me away. Do you remember when I told you that your methods would call for an accounting some day? I guess that day has come."

“So what are you going to do? Leave?”

“Leave you? Yes. I’m as rich and powerful as you in my own right. I have more mares than I know what to do with. The one and only reason I’m wasting another minute on you is that I respect my friends enough to try to not force them to pick sides.”

“Where would you go? I won’t have you in Equestria.”

“I’ll bet good money we’d be welcome in the Crystal Empire. Of course it would be a waste of a perfectly good castle to leave you here all by yourself. No, it would be much simpler for you to leave.”

“Do you actually believe you could throw me out?”

“I know I can. The question is, can you throw me out? Let’s just skip the preliminaries and go straight to a proper battlefield. I’d prefer The Badlands. Where would you suggest?”

“So you don’t want anypony to see you lose?”

“No, I don’t want innocent ponies hurt by accident. But if you want an audience, we can just go right back to five thousand yards up and I’ll put up a thousand yard sphere for an arena.”

“So you can control the field? No way.”

I’m direct, “Pick a spot. I’ll go wherever you like.”

“How can I possibly trust you again?”

“The whole point of this is that you don’t have a choice anymore. I’m stronger than you right now and I’m still growing. You have three minutes or forfeit.”

I stared at Celestia for three and a half minutes of silence.

“Goodbye.”

I teleport to Twilight’s tower.

“ARRRHHG!”

Ponies and one small dragon come boiling down the stairs. Twilight slams to a stop in front of me.

“Celestia?”

I nod, “Who else? I can deal with nests of demons but one damned mare frustrates me.”

I’m covered in warm furry love but that only strengthens my resolve.

“I’m going to be gone for a while. When I proved to Celestia that I was more than her equal she made it clear that she isn’t going to share power.”

Twilight is worried, “Is that what you two were fighting about?”

I replied, “No. The fight was over her treating me like a foal and endangering my life. When I proved to her that I am deserving of respect she went over the edge about losing power.”

A shocked Twilight says, “There has to be more to it, John.”

“Of course there is. You need to know this, Twilight. I could have been completely cured on the first day by simply rolling me out to a courtyard. Celestia knew it and decided not to mention it to me. And that’s not the bad part. She decided not to risk me being overloaded and burned out by the sun’s gift. I understand that. But when she didn’t tell me, she set me up for disaster. The very first thing I did when I could walk farther than the toilet was find an open door and walk out to the sun. I needed sun. And nopony had told me that it might overload me.”

That’s worth a collective gasp.

Twilight says, “That’s a pretty good reason to be pissed . . .”

“No, Twilight, that’s a reason to be annoyed. Pissed came when she told me she didn’t see how it was that big a problem. That launched me into ‘it’s a problem if I say it’s a problem’ and we went from there to a full on battle.”

“You don’t seem any worse for the wear.”

“She never landed a blow and I never threw one. I stopped the fight when she tried a suicide charge on me.”

“Oh. If she is that mad, how did you stop her?”

“I grabbed her and when she wouldn’t stop fighting, I mounted her. She locked up and I dumped all my feelings on her through her horn. She calmed down and we went back to her kitchen. That’s when she started the ‘there’s not enough room for both of us in Equestria’. She won’t fight and she won’t give.”

“Wait a minute, John. You mounted and she submitted and nothing happened?”

“I couldn’t. I was drawn up and ready to go when I hit a wall. She hasn’t held up her side of the deal we made and until she does the Oath won’t let me. She did that one to herself.”

“No No No No. The first stallion capable of dominating Celestia doesn’t cover her! Did you tell her why?”

“I told her all she needed to know, that she is the problem and I am out of sympathy.”

“No No No No. This could be catastrophic.” Twilight is frantic.

“I hope it is. I’ve tried everything I can short of exiling her or killing her. She needs a major shock.”

“John, please don’t do this. A conflict between you two could tear Equestria apart.”

“You think I don’t know that? My Oath won’t let me anyway. So I’m leaving. I’ll spend a day or two setting my affairs in order then I’m gone. And nopony is going with me. Equestria will need all of you that much more when I’m not here.”

We have a giant wing hug for a while and much sadness.

“I have to tell Luna. Go to her when I’m gone. Spend time with her during the day. She needs you and you need her. In case I don’t get back, I want everything I own in trust for my herd. Swift is head admin but all of you must work it together. Twilight, use them for support when Celestia tries to cut you off. I will be back but I don't know when. Do the things I would do while I’m gone like starting magic schools for Earth ponies.”

Twilight asks, “Do you really think she’ll do that?”

“If you make the mistake of telling her you agree with me she will probably lock you out of the Castle. I’m going to dispose of all my tech before I leave just in case. Right now I need to go see Luna and in the morning I’ll tell Fred. Swift, ready or not the decontamination is going off tomorrow.”

Luna is sitting at her kitchen table crying.

“Luna, what’s wrong?”

“Thou be planning to die.”

“Who told you that? Because it isn’t true.”

“John, the moon talks to the sun. I know thy plans.”

“Then you should know that I will be back.”

“Thou art planning to burn out. Thou will not be back from that.”

“No Luna. I am planning to operate at a level that would burn me out if I tried to keep it but instead I will do my job then go into recuperation before the burn out occurs. It will take years but I will come back. Meanwhile Celestia will have plenty of time to contemplate life alone at the peak of ponydom.”

“I understand thou be annoyed at my sister but is this a proper way to express it?”

“Luna, did you know that the sun could cure me?”

“Of course. The sun has been asking for thee. Celestia told me that she be doing the necessary things and I should help her keep thou calm and controlled.”

“Luna, do you know what I did just hours after you left? I got out of bed and went looking for the sun. I was drawn to it. If Celestia had been right about the overload, I would be dead right now. So much for ‘doing the necessary things’.”

“Be this the object of thy aerial confrontation?”

“Not exactly. The center of the fight was her insistence that there is no problem. But that is over and I am moving on. I need you to watch over my body while I recuperate. I will just appear on AJ’s farm as a large mare. I will live there with Fred and work on the farm as an ordinary Earth pony. I will not remember you or anything else that has happened to me before arriving on the farm. Swift has charge of my wealth while I am recuperating and can be counted on to support me or you in any way needed. I would prefer that as few as possible are aware of where I am. When the time is right, I will come out by myself.”

“Why wouldst thou want to be a mare?”

“Because Equestria needs my bloodline but it needs it properly applied. Any stallion with my blood will be a target for Celestia because she wants to control the new blood and therefore Equestria. A mare will do her no good and one foal a year will let my bloodline trickle in without disrupting things. I will probably take up with Fred because there is already a deep bond there but who knows what else is possible. Fred and Big Mac have always been best buddies so a coalition is likely. You and AJ will make sure I stay safe and do the right things.”

“This seems so extreme a measure, Friend John. Is there no other way?”

“There is more to it than I have told you. I will be operating at this extreme level for the specific purpose of eradicating all demons in Equestria. They have some of my tech and if left to pursue the knowing of it, they will end the Royal Herd and control Equestria. With Celestia’s help I might face them as I am. With Celestia’s opposition it is sure Equestria will fall to the demons. So Celestia’s suffering is justice for her disruptions. My regret is that so many others must share her suffering.”

“Now thy decisions seem sensible. I will help thee all ways that I can.”

“Just be with me for the rest of this night. I need the simple joy of a good friend to brace me for what is coming.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Nine )

It’s time, Great Friend John. I must go lower the moon. Today thou will be going to Sweet Apple Acres to meet with Fred and Applejack. May I accompany thou on this errand?”

“Most certainly, Friend Luna. I have to go to Twilight’s tower to pick up some things and will meet you back here in your kitchen.”

“Thank You, Friend John”

Everypony is in the kitchen wondering about me when I walk in to Twilight’s tower.

“Swift, forget about the decon. I’ll get Steel to clear the area with Guard and take care of the whole job myself. I need you mares to get every single asset in trust for the herd today. That’s priority. I don’t want anypony to be able to declare me dead tomorrow and take them. AJ, you and I are going to the farm to set some things up. Luna will be coming with us. First, I’m going to collect my tech for disposal.”

Up in our special room, I open my wizard’s pocket and pull out a bunch of human clothes I never want to need again. All my tech goodies go in the pocket and the duffel bags get stuffed with old clothes, tarps, etc. I put the duffels in the pocket too for easy carrying and head back down to the kitchen.

“Come on AJ. We’ve got to see Steel for a minute then pick up Luna.”

Steel was in his office looking glum.

I smiled at him, “Steel my friend, why so sad?”

“Celestia is on the warpath and I haven’t found the first demon.”

“Don’t worry. Just get me some ponies out to barricade the old bank building and I will solve your problems for you. We’re going out to the farm to set some things up and I will be back before lunch. When I get here I will clean up the site and leave it ready for new construction. Tomorrow I will take care of the demons and Celestia. You might want to retire before then. I am very sure that Swift will have a job opening for a chief of security.”

“John, what in the hell are you going to do?”

“Fix Equestria. Trust me and follow my advice. I’ll be gone for a while but I will leave everything Equestria needs ready to go. You need to be part of it.”

Luna is waiting and a quick teleport lands us in front of the farm house. I take to the air and spot Fred a couple of hundred yards north. Landing, I inform the others and we walk off that way.

“Fred has agreed to participate.”

“That went much better than I expected. I don’t why I worry. Fred always exceeds my expectations. Please take very good care of him for me.”

AJ heads for the farm house. Luna teleports to her rooms. And because I am ahead of schedule, I decide to fly to Canterlot. Soaring among the clouds is a simple pleasure I will be doing without for a very long time. Too soon, I see Canterlot below me. As I circle in to the construction site, a squad of Pegasi rise up to meet me.

“Your Majesty, we have been ordered to escort you to the Throne Room.”

“So escort me. By the way, we are going to make a stop at the site of the old bank building. I’m going to spend a few minutes cleaning up then we’ll go humor Celestia.”

“I don’t think that’s what She meant, Sir.”

“I know it’s not, but I don’t have to listen to her. Just keep me surrounded and we’ll tell her you tried.”

“Yes, Sir.”

Steel has the area well covered. I can work without fear of hurting anypony.

“Sergeant, make very damned sure that none of your ponies cross over the site. I’m going to throw enough energy around to vaporize anypony caught in it.”

“Yes, Sir!”

I hover over the crater as the squad scatters around it. To begin I open a continuous teleport portal to the sun with the end of it near the bottom of the crater. I order everything organic to leave the ruble and jump into the portal. Then I lift out that layer of ruble and stack it next to the hole. I do it again and again. After the third layer lumps begin to jump into the portal. I keep going until I have a bare hole in the ground. I shut the portal and set up an opaque cylindrical shield around the hole and ruble. Then I ask the sun to sterilize the whole thing. There is a bright flash with a cloud of steam. I drop the shield and it is done.

“Sergeant, time to go.”

I wait for the Pegasi to form around me and we head for the Castle. Landing, we walk in the main gate, up the hall, and around the corner to the main Throne Room door. I walk in to find Celestia sitting on her Throne waiting.

Celestia wastes no time, “John Sampson, you are ordered before this Court to show cause why you should not be expelled from the Royal Herd for inability to perform your required duties.”

“What ‘duties’ and what ‘inability’? You and I have an agreement that details who needs to do what very specifically. I’ve done my part and most of your part too. All failures are yours.”

“Not the single biggest failure. It’s yours.”

“And when would you hold this Court?”

“Right now.”

“What, no time to gather witnesses or evidence? No chance to find a proper venue? That hardly seems fair.”

“Very well, you have the rest of today. Be here and be ready when Court begins tomorrow morning.”

“Goodbye.”

It’s time for lunch and I need to take somepony with me. Swift is in my old office with stacks of papers along one wall.

“Swift Honey, let’s go eat lunch.”

“I’m going to have lunch brought in so I can keep working.”

“This won’t take that long and it’s important to me.”

“Let’s go.”

I teleport us to the street right outside Smoky’s.

Walking in the door, “Smoky! We need to talk.”

My usual table was empty so we settle there to wait. In under a minute Smoky comes out of the kitchen.

“Your Majesty John, welcome to my kitchen.”

“Smoky, we want our usual and I have news for you. I’m going to be gone for a while, years in fact. I’ll be back but until then Swift here will be your benefactor. If anything happens or you need anything, see her. She will probably move out of the Castle but she’ll let you know how to find her.”

“John, we’ve been hearing rumors of trouble in the land.”

“They’re no longer rumors. I’m going to put a lot of things right tomorrow. After that you two will have to hold Canterlot together until I return.”

The food arrives and we get busy with it.

Swift is somber, “It’s really sinking in now. You are going away.”

“Yes and I am relying on you to carry my load while I am gone. I’m sorry. It’s not what I had in mind at all.”

“Don’t worry. You’ve shown me heights I never dreamed existed. The only regret I have at all is not having your foal beside me while I wait.”

“Talk to AJ after I am gone. You can have a very good second best.”

We are done so we walk out the door and I teleport us back to my office.

“Swift, I’ve had a flash of paranoia. Make copies of everything and have Twilight take them for safe keeping in the Crystal Empire. I have no idea how Celestia is going to react to tomorrow but right now she is trying to kick me out and the logical next step to that is to seize everything I own.”

“John, the sense I get from the ponies that would do the kicking and seizing is that they’re far more likely to resign than follow her orders.”

“Yes, but I want them to have an ironclad reason not to follow the order.”

Leaving the mares to their work, I go to confirm with Steel that bank site is released.

“John, you are a prophet. This is my request for retirement right here in front of me and I may have to resign before it can take effect.”

“Don’t worry about it. Swift is waiting for you and can pay you better than Celestia. We’ve got a compound right outside the Palace gate and assorted farms available for immediate occupancy and we can build anything. Do what protects you and yours then fight over the pension later. We’ve got lawyers on staff.”

“There’s still a lot to building a Guard from scratch, John.”

“Who said ‘scratch’? The same deal applies to your chosen staff and, to a lesser degree, everypony down to recent recruits.”

“John, are you trying to hire the Guard away from Celestia?”

“Consider, how much is the Guard obligated to Celestia and how much to the Royal Herd? At least half of the Royal Herd will be splitting with Celestia. Who will you follow if Celestia is left in the Palace by herself? I’ll bet the half that leaves is the half that holds the rest of Equestria together. I want them to have the best chance of keeping the ponies healthy and happy.”

“I understand, John. My oath is to Celestia but my allegiance is to Equestria.”

“Then we are of a like mind. I wish you the best of luck.”

Back to Twilight’s tower to wait. My band will trickle in as they finish their day and we will have one last pile together. Some of them will still be here when I return but nopony will be unchanged, except maybe me.

Shining is waiting for me at the door, “John, what can I do to talk you out of this?”

“You can turn into a fourteen band Alicorn and do it for me.”

“That’s not funny, John.”

“It’s not funny from this side either. Show me any better way to save Equestria from the demons and I’ll jump on it in a Manehatten minute.”

“Cadance is talking to Celestia right now.”

“I wish her luck. Last time I tried, Celestia pulled a suicide charge on me.”

“Whoa. That’s bad.”

“And the demons have guns and good cover. I don’t feel like I have a lot of time or choices here.”

“What can I do, really?”

“Keep our records and keep a place for anypony that Celestia gets too mad at.”

“That’s a given, John.”

Cadance comes in the door behind me.

“John, why in Equestria are you tormenting Celestia like this?”

“I don’t know, maybe because it’s not me?”

“You’re the one that fought her to complete submission and just walked away, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m the one that fought her to complete submission and got blocked by her magic.”

“That doesn’t make sense, John.”

“Sense and Celestia should never be used in the same sentence. Haven’t you noticed all these oaths she likes to push on me? The last one included some specific conditions that had to be met before I could cover her. They haven’t been met. So her efforts to control me have backfired on her.”

“Are you sure of this, John?”

“Cadance, I fought her with the goal of wearing her down to submission without any injuries. I did it. I had her in my complete control. She was mounted and locked up with wings and scent and the whole nine yards. I was drawn up and rock hard. And when I went to thrust nothing happened. I couldn’t move. Is that enough for you?”

“I believe you. Have you told her?”

“I’ve told her forty times and forty different ways that she has to trust and share like an adult or it just won’t work. I’m going to tell her for the last time tomorrow morning three minutes before I leave.”

“You don’t think maybe some of the rest of us might get through to her and save you this trip?”

“Cadance, I’m not going because I want revenge on Celestia for her stupid personal problems. I’m going because it’s the only way I can save Equestria from the demons. And what I want right now is to enjoy one last night with the ponies I love.”

We push the beanbags together and get comfortable for an extended grooming session. It grows as ponies come home until we have to take dinner in shifts. Finally it’s time for bed. There’s some careful arranging until I’m in my place in the center of the pile.

Everypony but me is asleep. I’m too deep in protective mode to relax. A dark shape appears at the door.

“Be there room for another?”

I say softly, “Luna, there will always be room for you even if I have to stack you on top of me.”

Giggling, “That be a strange image, Friend John. Where might I fit tonight?”

“Come up in front of me. I will back up and you can slide in until you can rest your head on my shoulder. Then we can cover the pile with our wings overlapping.”

She fits right in and I can rest my chin on her shoulder. This is how Alicorns live. I can feel it in my bones. Then the tears begin. I can’t stop them.

I’m on my white floor with Luna.

“I know leaving hurts, Friend John. We all know and will wait for you.”

“It’s not the leaving, my Darling Luna. It’s the failure. I have my whole herd here, together in health and happiness, except one. That one is howling in loneliness right now. I feel it and I can’t help. I should have found a way.”

“It’s not over, Friend John. Alicorns have all the time in the world. Give her a century or two and try again.”

“Luna, my mind knows that and I have made my plans accordingly, but my heart still feels the pain and demands action.”

“That be thy youth talking, Friend John. In a few centuries it will pass and thou can cry for its loss instead.”

“So immortality isn’t all that it’s advertised to be.”

“Longer be longer and better be better. They be not the same thing. All thou really hast be more chances to fix thy mistakes.”

“My Great Love Luna, this is why I want you with me. You have the same wisdom and perspective as your sister but without the narrow focus.”

“Curb thy thoughts, Friend John. Too far down that road lies madness.”

“You forget who you are talking to, Friend Luna. I’m the stallion that eats monsters. I have decided against killing Celestia many times and will continue to do so.”

“I do not understand, Friend John.”

“Without the demon threat, I would take all herd members that wished to accompany me and set up a new society in a place far enough away for Celestia to be unknown. You know I have the resources and ability.”

“I believe that I would accompany you, My Magnificent Stallion.”

“I believe that most of Equestria would.”

“I don’t know, Friend John. Many ponies would stay in the homes they are accustomed to simply out of habit.”

“I am sure you are right. Many more would stay out of fear of the unknown. That’s a good thing. The ponies that leave would be the best ponies. The new society could leave a lot of mistakes and impediments behind.”

“Thou speak as though thou hast seen this before.”

“I have, Friend Luna. The land of my birth was formed this way and in less than two centuries became the most powerful nation on Terra. I think of that and I think of the advantages I could give such an undertaking by already knowing many of the mistakes that could be made. You should tell Celestia of this conversation while I am gone.”

“Are thou sure that would be wise?”

“No, but I must give Celestia every possible chance when I return. I owe her that much and the existence of such an alternative might be the incentive she needs. I thank you for the intelligent advice, My Wonderful Mare Luna. Now I need to prepare myself for what is coming.”

“Fare thee well on thy journey, My Magnificent Stallion John. I will be eagerly awaiting thy return.”

I use the rest of the night to make plans and look for flaws. There are a few flaws but the alternatives are all worse. I have at least enough to accomplish my goals. Then Luna slips out and I know it is time. As soon as Luna is out the door I back up far enough to be clear of the pile and teleport to the balcony. I don’t have to wait long.

Celestia teleports to right in front of me with her horn lit and ready.

“Don’t even think about it you bastard. The sun is mine and I’m not giving it up.”

“I don’t want the sun, Celestia. Just the opposite. I’m here to say goodbye.”

“How do I know I can trust you after you betrayed me?”

“I never betrayed you Celestia. That was your mistake. Remember that binding oath with all the clauses to keep me under control? Well it kicked in. You never met the requirements to allow me to cover you. Believe me, I was trying.”

“What are you talking about, John?”

“Remember you were supposed to line up mares for me? I did that. Remember you were supposed to have resources set aside to raise the foals and care for the gravid mares? You refused, told me they were my responsibility. Remember you were supposed to keep my mares safe? And one got kidnapped right out of the Castle. But most of all, you were supposed to call me to you when you were ready. You didn’t do that. You made me fight you. So I simply couldn’t make that first thrust no matter how hard I tried.”

“Why didn’t you tell me, John?”

That breaks her concentration so I scoop her up with a three yard spherical soft shield. She is pissed but she is smart enough not to fight the shield.

“Damn you, John. I knew I shouldn’t trust you.”

“I didn’t tell you this time because I’ve told you over and over and your reply is that it’s not a problem. Well now you’re going to have a lot of time to think about how much of a problem it really is. You had your dream, a stallion with the strength and knowledge to make Equestria a paradise. I wanted all the ponies to welcome the new age of prosperity heralded by the formation of a Royal Couple. All you had to do is act like an adult and you couldn’t do it.”

“We could still do that, John. You’ve convinced me.”

“Celestia, it’s simply too late. You’ve cost me too much time dealing with the demons. I have to get them now or they’ll get us. I’m not leaving because you pissed me off. If that was the case I’d cross an ocean and forget about you. This is much bigger than your emotional problems.”

I feel Luna moving. It’s time. I reach out and ask for the sun.

“Come to me, my friend. Bring your light and warmth to us all and bring your gift to me. It is time.

As my magic releases the sun a yellow beam shoots out and envelopes me. Power surges through me and I grow into a fourteen band Alicorn. Suddenly I can see everything. All of Equestria is laid out before me plain as day including the demons.

“Thank you, my friend. I will try to use your gift wisely.”

Celestia is stunned, “John, you’re going to burn out like that!”

“Yes, I know. But not before every last demon has been fed to the sun. Every second I’ve had since the demons cornered me in the bank has been a gift. I wanted to use the gift for the glory of Equestria but I’m going to have to settle for Equestria’s survival.”

I call the duffels out of my pocket and send them to the sun.

“That was all the remains of my human life. My tech won’t be around to tempt anypony. Think on this, Celestia, what you see standing in front of you is what our grand foals would have looked like.”

The nearest demon is in the Palace. I teleport to the hall outside Steel’s office and walk through the wall.

Steel is surprised, “John? You’ve changed again.”

“I have a present for you, your spy.”

I open the door to his clerk’s office and seize the clerk in my magic.

“Want to touch her and verify what I’m telling you?”

“No thanks. I trust you.”

I send it to the sun.

“I’ll root them all out before I’m done. Don’t be surprised at any stories you hear. And you better get on that retirement.”

I teleport around Canterlot digging out and disposing of demons. Zigging and zagging across Equestria, I find sixty two. Steel’s list was a little short. I destroy a couple of workshops containing stolen tech too. One last circuit of Equestria by air with no demons found and I’m done. I land in the pasture on the farm. Fred and AJ are waiting.

I edit Fred’s body image in place and when I release it, it takes effect. Fred is still Fred colored but he’s a pony with an anchor for a cutie. He’s bigger than Big Mac but he’s smaller than a horse. He’s a Draft pony, like an Earth pony but bigger and with more magic.

“How’s it feel, Fred?”

“Colors, so many colors.”

“Yes, ponies have more colors in both senses. Fred, our link will still be there even if I don’t remember. Use it to learn.”

“Yes, John. Much happy. Much sad.”

“AJ, I’m so sorry for dumping this on you. Equestria is safe now and everypony can get back to having a normal life except us. I will become a Draft mare, a match for Fred. My foals will be important to Equestria but my bloodline won’t be useful to Celestia. Swift will help you with them. Between you two they should have the best herd imaginable.

“I’ve told Swift this already and she has promised to honor me. I want the same from you. Don’t wait for me. I may be gone longer than you’ll live. Find a good stallion to help you and make you happy.”

I pull up the ‘Bud’ body from my list and pour all of my magic into it.

John Sampson's Story ( Prologue )

I’m waiting, not uncomfortable, not excited, just waiting. There is plenty of room in the hall with water and toilet facilities nearby. Food is not much farther away. But the line is long and I’m at the wrong end of it. I can’t complain. It’s obvious that the business of government comes first. Military leaders, ministers and ambassadors will always be at the head of the line. Nobles and business leaders will always precede simple farm ponies. So I wait.

It’s not as bad as it sounds. The Guardpony took my name and a ‘brief summary of the problem’ when I signed in. I have absolute faith in the bureaucracy to keep my place in line for me. It may take days but I will get into the throne room. But then I’ll have to actually articulate my problem and I don’t know if I can do that. If it wasn’t such a mystery to me I wouldn’t have to ask a Princess for help.

There are a few advantages to being a Draft pony. We aren’t common in Canterlot so we always have the best seat in the house. We’re big enough to just look right over the top of everypony else. That's why I’m one of the first to notice a commotion at the Throne Room door. Guards come bursting through the door, scattering the dignitaries like leaves. Then the biggest, brightest, most beautiful pony that I’ve ever seen strides through and heads down the line. It’s Her Majesty, Princess Celestia, in the flesh! I quickly bow my head in case she passes me on her way to whatever is so urgent. I wait, but she never passes me.

“John Sampson?” inquires the most wonderful voice in the world.

I. Know. That. Voice. She must be looking for the pony that was next to me but how do I recognize that voice?

“Look at me John Sampson.” again, that voice.

Then I feel a tingling of magic under my chin and find myself looking directly into the wisest eyes in the world.

“Your Majesty, my name is Bud, just Bud, and I don’t know who John Sampson is.”

Princess Celestia steps back and motions for two of Her Guards. “Take this pony to my private office and see to it that she is made completely comfortable.” She turns to the rest of Her Guards and says “All audiences below ambassadorial level are canceled” as she strides briskly back to the throne room.

“This way, please ma’am.” The Guards seem unsure if they are more awed by a pony my size or confused by the fact that a Princess took notice of a simple dirt farmer. We walk right up to a nondescript door. Inside is a large practical office like I would expect any business executive to own. One of the Guardponies points to a door at the back of the room and says, “Toilet in there, ma’am.” Then they turn and leave the way we came in.

This is the first furniture I’ve seen outside of one of my herd's homes that is big enough to be comfortable for me. There’s tea and snacks on the table and the maid seems positively astonished that I didn’t want anything else. The wall behind me is full of books but I don’t get to more than glance at them before Princess Celestia comes in through the door at the other end of the room. I turn and bow.

“Bud, there is no need for formality in this office. It exists to let me cut through time wasting rituals and get done what is most important. Please tell me what has brought you here to see me.”

“Your Majesty, it started with a simple question: How old am I? I can’t remember a dam or foalhood but I always assumed that I had been injured and just lost those memories. It seems like Fred, my stallion, and I have always been together and have always been right where we are today, on our farm. Fred is missing the same kind of memories but all that means is that we got caught up in the same disaster which would be normal for any couple as close as we are.”

Celestia nods, “But there’s more.”

“We have a happy band with foals of all ages running around. Some of our foals have grown up to become teachers, business leaders, and military officers with bands and foals of their own. Others have stayed to help on the farm. We are a large herd and well off enough that no pony gets less than they deserve. Then I was forced to miss the funeral of my great grandfilly because I was in labor. Yes, I mean dropping a foal. Even that didn’t seem strange until they brought me the commemorative page from the funeral. My great grandfilly had lived a long life and died of old age. And yet here we are, her great grand dam and sire, a young healthy broodmare with a young virile stallion. How is it possible?”

Celestia mulls it over for several minutes. Reaching a conclusion She says, “Let me tell you a story from long ago, one that very few ponies know.”

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Eight )

That damned alarm! Why doesn’t somepony complain about that noise?

Our morning routine passes as usual until we walk in the door of the cafeteria. Colonel Steel is waiting.

“Same order, darling. I’ll take the heat.”

“Major, did you know that my first duty every morning is to review the Royal Proclamations? I have to check for a potential security breach and this morning I may have found one. It seems one of my officers wants to publicly admit to casting dangerous spells on himself. Do you think that is a good idea?”

“No, sir, I don’t. But it is the best of several bad ideas.”

“I can redact it or send it back for reconsideration. All of the Princesses have seen it now so no effect would be lost.”

“Part of my honor would be lost, sir.”

“That’s what I thought you’d say. Very well. Have a good day, Major.”

“What was that all about?” Swift has arrived bearing food.

“I confessed to being the cause of the noise complaint. The Colonel was just confirming it.”

“Who did you confess to?”

“Luna and Celestia”

“Good. Maybe all of this will die down now.”

Breakfast is pleasant but as we are leaving I notice a group gathering in a corner of the room. They seem focused on something on the floor so I just have to go look. It is a pony, a Private, a familiar Private, sleeping laid across a duffel bag. I motion for Swift to join me then I motion for everypony to stand back.

Swift glances at him and “a-ten-HUT”

Colt jumps to his feet at full attention. It might have worked if he had been on the floor instead of on top of his duffel. I’ve got to give him credit he rolled once and came up saluting.

“Private Berry reporting, sir. . . Major John? . . SIR.”

I return salute, “At ease, Private. Now, what the bloody hell are you doing sleeping in the mess?”

“I got my orders assigning me to your office yesterday. I couldn’t get on the noon train because the ticket office was closed for some holiday. Then the night train was reserved so I couldn’t get on it. I walked here. Everypony had gone to bed so I waited here.”

Damned. I could hardly blame him for any of that. “You’re lucky the Colonel didn’t spot you. He was just here. He’d geld you for this.”

A helpful voice from the crowd spoke up, “He saw him, sir. He said you’d handle it.”

“Very well. Private, you will report to the Company Clerk's office. If the clerk isn’t in, you will stand next to the door until the clerk arrives. You will get all of your papers and billet straight. You will familiarize yourself with the Castle in general and the Guard Sector in detail until sundown. Tomorrow morning at zero five hundred you be here, in the mess, wide awake and ready for duty. Do you understand, pony?”

“Yes, SIR.”

“Dismissed.”

We are in the Doctor’s office after a normal PT. The Admin Nurse decided to handle us personally, settling us in a comfortable office.

“The Doctor will be with you momentarily, Major.”

And she is, “Good morning, Major, Captain. I have some interesting news for you.” Doctor Red smiles. “You, sir, are one hell of a stallion. You have a high count of nearly perfect sperm but most amazing is their motility. I believe that you could ejaculate on the vulva of a mare and impregnate her.”

“Doc. That’s human normal. Of course the farther the sperm have to travel, the fewer will make it but they are made to swim uphill.”

“I had suspected as much but that’s not the best part. We ran a chimera test and you passed it. In fact, you passed it three times.”

“Doctor, what exactly is a ‘chimera test’?”

“We extract ova from an animal, usually a rodent, then spell the ova to counterfeit pony ova. Outside a uterus it won’t develop past a few divisions but it gives us an indication that the sperm being tested will fertilize a mare.”

“Doctor, speculate with me for a minute. Let us suppose that an energetic young foreigner decide to become a pony. That this ignorant youngster had never performed magic in his life and yet had managed to accumulate a great deal of it. So for his first spell he swore a mighty Oath to make himself a pony, the best pony he could be. Further suppose that in the back of his mind while he was composing and speaking this Oath he was dreaming of having the best pony family with the best foals. How do you think that would work out medically?”

“I believe that I can look forward to attending a lot of births for your band, Major.” And Doctor Red smiled from ear to ear.

“Are there any other tests that we need?”

“No, I think you just answered all the questions I had. Thank you very much, Major.”

“Captain, I will be here at the same time tomorrow with the clerk I promised. Can you have me a non-essential but knowledgeable nurse to work with him?

“Of course. And I have a room with supplies. I’m looking forward to seeing just what you are up to.

“We’ll see you then.”

In the hall I asked Swift, “Let’s go see Twilight.”

“Okay.”

We walk up to Twilight’s main door. The usual Guardpony is there. We ask if Twilight is in. He speaks to a speaking tube briefly and lets us in. Twilight is in her second floor library looking like a student studying for finals.

“I come bearing gifts, Princess.”

She looks me up and down then behind me, “I don’t see anything.”

“The best kind of gifts, Princess, intangible gifts. Gifts that can’t be lost or broken.”

“Now I’m worried. Stallions with promises are the bane of every mare.”

“You wound me, My Princess. All I ask in return are a few trifles. A library, and the answers to two questions.”

“I’m still working on your last question. I don’t know if I can stand two more.”

Uh oh. “Which question are you still working on?”

“What it will take for you to be properly fertile with a pony mare.”

“Twilight, I’m sorry but I’ve already answered that question.”

“You have?” Oh so sweetly “Pray tell, what is your answer and how did you find it?”

“I’m more fertile than the average pony stallion and you told me.”

“I . . told . . . you? . . . John, have you ever seen a pissed off Alicorn? Would you like to?”

“The key was in our discussion of my magic and how it relates to my Oath. Remember that I wanted to be the best pony that I could? Behind that I was defining ‘best pony’ as the strongest protector of the best band with the best foals. I spelled myself to fertility. The Doctor tested it and confirmed it.

“And Twilight, we’re not half an hour out of the doctors office yet. We came as soon as the ramifications sank in.”

“John, that’s actually a very astute understanding of magic for a complete beginner. For that you’ll get your first trifle. What kind of books do you want?”

“Basic to advanced general knowledge starting with magic. And some language primers. I’ll have to learn to read then learn exactly what the state of the art is in Equestria. I was impressed by the use of magic to obtain detailed internal images of me. I was not impressed by a doctor’s complete ignorance of basic biology. At some point I want to drop some useful hints on Equestrian academia. Now, ask me any question.”

“Why do you want to do these things for Equestria?”

“Because it is my nature. I can’t not do it. That is part of what my cutie mark means.”

“How could you prove something like that?”

“Ask Swift, or AJ, or Luna. They have all seen my heart. Ask Colonel Steel.”

“What was that exchange with you two the other night?”

“Please, Twilight, you won’t like that answer.”

“I want it anyway!”

“I asked the Colonel to personally grant me a quick and honorable death should Celestia deem it necessary.”

“That’s just not possible, John.”

“It’s what all the Services do, Twilight. We die that the greater mass of civilians can live in peace and harmony. Ask Swift.”

“No! Ponies have grown beyond such violent ways.”

“I’m sure we have, Twilight, but what about the rest of the universe? Some of them haven’t got the memo yet. Remember that Manticore? I was perfectly willing to live and let live. He was hungry. Someone has to stand between the foals and the Manticores.”

“You ate that Manticore. How is that any better than him eating you?”

“I ate him so that his death wouldn’t be wasted after I killed him to keep him from killing me. He was stalking me. I was walking around him.

“Now for my question. How does a heartbond affect or influence other strong magic? Specifically, could somepony heartbonded with me access my magic or be influenced by it? Could the Magic of Harmony used by a Bearer influence or be influenced by a heartbond?

“Are you thinking of AJ?”

“Some. I’m also worried about Swift. We heartbonded before we knew that my magic is tied to my heart. I wouldn’t mind Swift accessing it but I wouldn’t want it accessing Swift. I may also want to bond with a Unicorn someday.”

“That will and intent rule would apply here. Your magic couldn’t harm anyone you didn’t intend to harm nor could your magic be accessed without your directed will.

“Re the Elements, we know that historically they have withdrawn from this world rather than permit less than ideal access. They represent a will beyond any single pony and are very well protected from abuse. So I wouldn’t worry about heartbonding with AJ. Or an Alicorn.”

I have some digesting to do after the questions and being pragmatic, I start picking out books while I think. Twilight is explaining the pony alphabet to me and showing me how to read the titles of the books when something clicks. Pony writing isn’t a different language, it is different shapes better suited to writing without hands. Freaking obvious when you think about it.

After we have a fair pile of books, the subject of where to keep them comes up. I want them in my office where I can use them daily. That means I need some bookshelves. In fact, we need a whole apartment of furniture. So Twilight takes us shopping. I’ve got to tell you, shopping with a Princess is a pleasure. The only questions are ‘when’ and ‘where’. My sole disappointment is the total lack of even a concept for ‘executive chair’. But I do get a really sweet desk.

At lunchtime I spot a very familiar looking fast food place with an orange high peak roof. Twilight isn’t impressed but I want to see what the pony version of an old familiar place is like. It is worth it. They have fish or chicken salad.

We explore the idea of shoes for me with a farrier. Boots are not a problem but the shape eludes him. I will bring my old boots by some day.

I buy Swift some new large saddle bags suitable for traveling and make a note of the fancy bags she looked at three times but didn’t want.

Finally we find the bookstore. There are a couple of foal’s primers and then I find the book of my dreams. It’s Encyclopedia Equestria, twenty two volumes of condensed Equestrian knowledge. I insist on taking it all home with us.

When we get back to the castle there are some packages in our suite. The note says, “These are a few of the easy ones to tide you over. Enjoy. Rarity.”

We decide not to unpack because we will be in our new apartment shortly but we have to look at the clothes. There are capes and scarves for both of us. I have some stretch shirts that looked sprayed on and a couple of what look like pajamas and a couple of more like sweats. I normally go bare at home but I get this feeling that I may like them in winter.

I’ve started on one of the learn to read books when an idea hit me. “Swift, could you help me with something? I want to write a letter.”

“Sure, John. Who to?”

“AJ. I want to invite her up here for a date.”

“John, is there a particular human custom on signing letters?”

“No, we do it pretty much the same way.”

“Then let’s read this one through and if you like it, we can sign it,” as she reaches into a drawer.

It is in the traditional form, which is to say rather flowery, and I like it. We add a note at the bottom to suggest arrival on the noon train to spend the afternoon and evening in Canterlot with meals. Swift signs it with a rather complex mark I don’t even understand and I sign with my normal signature which confuses Swift. I bet AJ saves it for the novelty. The envelope is addressed and sealed to be turned over to the Company Clerk in the morning.

I make a lap. “Swift, baby, come over here, please. We have some things to talk about.”

She climbs up in my lap and leans against me nosing and licking my chest. “Is this serious talk or is this fun talk?”

“Serious talk I’m afraid, at least for a while.”

“Well, I’m going to amuse myself while you think.” And she started lipping and pulling on my nipple.

“Darling, please remember we promised a Princess that we wouldn’t do that again.”

“I know that. But I want you well and truly teased when we get to where we can.”

Deep breaths. “O. Kay. We have some decisions to make if we are going to invite AJ in. AJ is a major shareholder in a big and profitable farm. The farm is also her family so we can’t expect her to walk away from it. Neither can we expect her to allow it to be disbursed among our many foals. And if we are going to expect AJ to contribute farm income to our band she has a right to expect us to contribute to the farm. But most of all, a strong Earth pony like AJ would go crazy sitting around while we spend our days on Guard business or travel on assignments. We could move to AJ’s farm, and nothing would suit me better, but that would mean walking away from duty and maybe even Destiny. There will be lawyers before it is over but be thinking what you want and expect.

So we settle in for a few hours grooming. Logic tells me it must be part of my inner pony but I don’t care. Happiness is defined as carefully nibbling and licking my mare clean.

It is a normal morning right up until we walk in to the cafeteria. Colt is waiting. As we eat I explain things to Colt.

“Colt, my mornings are my chance to be casual and ordinary. We are here this morning because my office is still under construction. When my office is done we will meet there.

What we are going to do is fix a problem with the Surgeons office. Their system for admitting ponies into the office for medical care is so broken that I was banded between when I started signing in and when I saw the doctor.”

That has the effect of a small detonation. “Major John! You’re banded! You and Captain Swift?”

“Well, who better for a stallion have breakfast with than his mare? Now, what you are going to do is sit down with a nurse and this huge mass of forms they want everypony to fill out and reduce it something manageable using Terran methods that I will teach you. When we are done, ponies will be able to get medical treatment in half the time. It will be tedious, boring work but when it is done it will save several pony lives a day for many years.

“Colt, It’s great to be the point pony. You get to be a hero smiting the evil whatever and capturing the hearts of mares everywhere. But the reality is that it takes fifty ponies working together to put that point pony out there. Somepony has to mine the ore for another pony to smelt for another pony to forge for the hero pony to carry. Several ponies will move the metal between each step. And several more feed all these ponies while they do their work. And make sure the right amount of the right metal is in the right place when it’s needed.

“We sing songs and tell stories about that hero but he’s really just the guy that was at the right place and time out of a thousand Guardponies that did their duty and waited for destiny. There is courage in just showing up and doing your job without everypony telling you how wonderful you are. You will know what you accomplished and that must be enough.

“It makes me sound like a recruiter, doesn’t it? I’ll give you one final thought. This is exactly how I got where I am today. Ponies that get the job done are in demand everywhere.”

I won’t bore you with all the details. Colt buckled down and shocked the crap out of Doctor Red. It seems like medical school isn’t the only thing you need to keep ponies healthy. Swift and I get moved in. There are some ‘adjustments’ but we end up in a nicely furnished apartment with a large common room, enough master bedroom for a bunch of ponies, two guest or whatever rooms, and a decent kitchen. We have an office adjoining with executive in back and secretary in front. The office has a separate hall door and side door from kitchen to back office. The kitchen also has a door opening on a large courtyard common to all of officers row.

Our wardrobe came, and came, and came. So do the books. It takes many trips to town as we find one more thing we don’t have but we are getting a sweet life together. The courtyard hosts regular gatherings of off duty officers and we seem to be becoming popular there. Several stallions have asked for private advice on lovemaking and Swift tells me that some mares have done the same.

Letters are going back and forth with AJ. We have understanding and acceptance that we can’t have a conventional marriage. If the guard and the farm weren’t enough of a conflict, we also have the Elements and my Destiny. But we agree that’s all the more reason we need foals to carry our heritage forward and foals need bands. We’ll finally have that date soon.

I am waiting at the Canterlot Train Station, wearing one of my pretty uniforms, for the noon train. AJ is coming for our first date. We have decided to explore Canterlot for the afternoon and have dinner in town. The train is on time and there aren’t a lot of passengers so I don’t have long to wait.

“AJ?” I do a double take. “Oh my, AJ. you must do this more often.”

AJ has released her mane from the usual ponytail to a flowing cloud of blond matched by her tail. In the fashion center of Equestria she is getting looks.

We stroll casually up the main boulevard into town taking in the atmosphere of a bustling city. Ponies are waving at us as we pass, some coming out of their homes and shops to watch us go by. I wave and nod to them. AJ was awestruck.

“John, is it like this everywhere ya go?”

“First, it’s ‘we’ and second, no. Ponies are here because they want to be part of something big and you can’t get much bigger than Royal. ‘We’, the Royal Guard staffer and gorgeous Element Bearer, are a single step removed from being a Royal. That’s twenty steps closer than most of them will ever get. When we recognize them we validate their dreams. It’s a small enough gift.

“Do they know about all the hard work, boring training, risk to life and limb, sacrifice of friends and family? Of course they do. And they are quite sure that if the opportunity ever arises, they will do all that for the cause of greatness.

“It’s not all bad. If I take off the uniform they will mostly respect my privacy even though I could never hide who I am. The exceptions are almost all foals. And it’s almost impossible for me to buy a beer. Somepony else always wants to pay for it. You could cover up your cutie mark and be incognito. But when you are attached to the Royal Court there is always an obligation to uphold the reputation and image.”

“I’ve just never thought about it, John. Every time I’ve been here we’ve traveled with an escort. It must be hard on Twilight.”

“It’s far worse for Twilight. As a Princess she can give ponies substantial gifts. Celestia and Luna have largely withdrawn into the Royal Residences after centuries of this pressure. It’s the same thing you hear about the farm, ‘You have so many apples it couldn’t hurt you to give me a couple of bushels . . . a week.’ They just get it on a much grander scale.”

“John, I’m really developing a new appreciation for Ponyville.”

“Treasure it, AJ. This is what drove me to abandon the land of my birth. The small town lifestyle where everypony knows and respects everypony was rapidly being replaced by the ‘What’s in it for me’ lifestyle.

“But we have a far more pressing question right now, AJ. Did you eat on the train?”

“No, John, I could eat right now if ya wanted to.”

“You see that pointy building right over there? That’s my favorite ‘Why not a Burger’, the perfect place for a snack.”

“They got hayburgers?”

“And more.”

“Let’s go.”

She has a hayburger with apple slices and tea. I have a chicken salad with tea. She doesn’t blink when I start putting away the meat with great gusto. Plus two points.

After lunch we drift through the market district. I spot a florist and steer her in. We pick out some blossoms for her mane and a box to snack on later. There is art to be admired and art to be ridiculed. Mostly we talk about the small things like Terran crops versus Equestrian crops. As the sun is sneaking down to the horizon we find ourselves in front of Smoky’s Bar B Que. Smoky is big happy Earth pony with an amazing ability to smoke absolutely anything. Service is walk through the kitchen and point. Seating is bench and there is a half block line waiting to get in. That is unless you are somepony who has shared some human barbecue recipes with Smoky.

We have the stew. There are baby carrots, baby corn, squash, okra, butter beans, broccoli, and baby potatoes in a sweet sticky sauce. It was made to get messy with and AJ loves it.

We walk out under a bright moon and turn toward the Castle.

“John, the train is the other way and we had better hurry if I want to make it.”

“Why do you want to catch the train? Is there something Big Mac can’t do on the farm?”

“No, but I don’t want ta come between you and Swift.”

“AJ, between me and Swift is exactly where we both want you.”

“But I don’t want ta interfere.”

“AJ, if you want to join this band, the first thing you need to do is to spend some family time with us and find out what we are really like.”

“John, isn’t this moving a little fast?”

“What, having a sleepover with friends? I thought you’d done that with Twilight and the rest.”

“But . . . “

“But nothing, AJ. It’s time to trust.”

“John, there are so many things I don’t know and thought I had more time to find out.”

“You have all of the time you need. Let us show you why. You have the ability. Use it. Ask me my intentions.”

She stops and looks directly at me. “No, John, I don’t need ta do that.”

Swift is sitting in the main room waiting for us. I leave AJ with her and go to the bedroom to undress. I come back and settle down next to Swift pulling her against me. She nuzzles my chest and I kiss the top of her head.

“Darling, I took AJ to Smoky’s. I think she liked it.”

Swift smiles, “And I bet you got the stew.”

“Of course.”

“AJ, did he tell you that the stew is his recipe?”

AJ is looking a little shocked, “No.”

“It is. I told him he should hold out for a partnership but he’s happy with unlimited free food.”

AJ giggles, “I was wondering how he just walked in past a hundred ponies like he owned the place.”

“Swift my love, I think AJ has some questions.. Could you maybe help her out from the mare’s point of view?”

“Certainly. What do you want to know, AJ?”

A rather fidgety AJ replies, “I’m not sure how ta ask.”

It’s not easy to see red on orange but I am seeing it on AJ. “AJ, Swift and I are old troopers. We tend to be blunt and direct. Just say it.”

Swift jumps in, “John, let me. AJ, let me tell you what he’s like as a stallion. He’s big. He’s unbelievably strong. And he is the most patient gentle stallion you can imagine. You’ve been hearing stories, haven’t you?”

Damned. I hope AJ doesn’t catch the cushions on fire. She nods. “Some ponies like it wild and rough.”

Swift is grinning, “We like it wild, just not rough.”

AJ is confused again. “But what about all the screaming and banging?”

“Banging? I don’t remember any banging.”

“I was banging you.”

“Yes, but all that was made was squishy noises.”

“True.”

“The screaming, on the other hand, was very true. We both did a lot of that.”

“Did it hurt that much?” AJ asked with concern.

We both start laughing heartily. “I’m sorry, AJ. It didn’t hurt at all. I was screaming because I wanted everypony in the castle to know that I had just bred my mare. I’m damned proud of it. That’s why I had to apologize in Royal Court a day later.”

“And that’s how we got this sweet new apartment. Celestia wanted us safely out of earshot,” Swift grins.

“I guess it might have worked out different if I hadn’t left the balcony door open.”

Now AJ was giggling along with us.

“Seriously, AJ, my soul is pony but my body is still human and there are some differences. For example, I don’t flare. On the upside, I last a lot longer. And the doctor has determined that I am super fertile. But best of all, I have hands.”

Swift chimes in again, “He’s not kidding, AJ. Hands are wonderful. You can come over here right now and find out for yourself.”

AJ is looking a little red again.

“AJ, we are going to bed shortly. We wake at zero four hundred with the help of a rather obnoxious alarm clock. We have tea and toilet here then breakfast at the cafeteria. PT follows breakfast and the actual day starts around zero seven thirty. You can keep up with us or sleep in. You can stay the day if you wish. Or the week.

“There are two brand new guest rooms behind you but I mean exactly what I say about wanting you between Swift and I. You are invited to sleep there tonight.”

“I want you there too,” Swift chorused. “I need your help with this band.”

“Can I shower first?”

“Of course. Would you mind if we all shower together? It’s another of those wonderful hands things. You’ll love it,” Swift promises.

AJ is nervous at first and tries to keep Swift between us so I sit on the floor and Swift practically herds her into my arms. I lather her neck and one side of her barrel before I have to stand to move around. She watches me but stands as I lather her other side and mane. She takes a step but stops when I start on her tail.

After we rinse and step out of the shower Swift tosses me a towel and I go to work on AJ and her mane. Swift brings me another towel as I pick up a brush and I begin moving the brush and towel together down her mane.

Swift throws a towel over my back and says, “I’m telling you, AJ, he has a compulsion to take care of us. He can’t help himself.”

AJ wonders, “Is he like this all the time?”

About then I raise AJ’s tail and go to work on it. She starts.

Swift reassures her, “Don’t worry. He’s like a super big sister until you throw the Stallion switch. When you move in I’ll show where it is.”

“Swift darling, you do know I can hear you?”

“So?”

“So I know where all the mare buttons are.

“AJ, this is what life is like in Equestria’s most exotic band.” I smile at her.

We finish in the bathroom and I lead the family to the bed, settling on the pad first. I motion for AJ and she lays down in front of me in the little spoon. Swift lays in front of her and we all snuggle tighter. I feel the last of the tension drain from AJ as she nuzzles under my chin. I decide that this was a very good day as I fade into sleep.

John Sampson's Story ( Chapter Twenty Three )

We are in Celestia’s big conference room again, this time contemplating some serious action. I have a presentation to make.

“Everything that I am going to tell you can be witnessed in my memories. I will open them for inspection by any who desires.

“While escorting Luna for the Celebration I noticed some Minotaurs acting in a threatening manner. I sent Luna into the Castle via teleport to notify Celestia and Steel. Night Guard Captain Dark Sword took Luna’s place to serve as bait for the Minotaurs and any other threat. Captain Swift Trail came out to the dais as a courier to carry messages between myself and Steel. The Minotaurs attacked at that moment and I sent Swift into the Castle escorted by Dark. Swift is missing and Dark is dead after the attack is thwarted. Swift’s saddle bags containing my clothes and sword disappeared with her.

“The sword has a large Sun Sigil in the pommel and Celestia was able to trace it to a mine southeast of Appleloosa. I entered the mine and recovered the saddlebags with the sword still in them. There was an image of Swift being projected into the mine from elsewhere. Moving the saddlebags triggered a complete collapse of the mine. It was a trap tailored to kill my human body but partially ascended, I was able to escape.

“Investigation in the town of Appleloosa yielded two ponies that had contact with the outsiders that had arrived by rail with equipment and claiming to be reopening the mine. They started work weeks ago, so this is an organized, long term plan. The Mine Inspector has paper records of each individual that registered to work in the mine and I have his memories with face, coat, and cutie all clear and complete on every one of them. The pony that signed off as superintendent of the mine was Blueblood himself.

“Do we have enough to bring him in and force a memory search? Or to raid the compound and find some of the henchponies?”

Twilight speaks first, “We most certainly have enough to ask a lot of questions.”

Luna goes next, “I want my friend Swift back.”

Shining speaks bluntly, “I want point on the entry team.”

Cadance has a question, “Have we considered going public with this? Lay it all out in front of the ponies and let them put pressure on Blueblood?”

Celestia answers that, “Too many dangerous things could come out with it. Remember that Blueblood has been pilfering in the palace.”

Steel says simply, “I want to stand next to Shining.”

And my opinion, “Steel and Shining can flip a coin to decide who gets my left and who gets my right.”

AJ says, “I only care about one thing. I want Swift back.”

Celestia is looking at me, “I need another option.”

I think for a moment, “Do we have a neutral third party? Somepony who could go to Blueblood and arrange a meeting. We could ‘explore options’ with them.”

Celestia is still looking at me, “Would you make and honor an agreement with them?”

“I will do anything to get Swift back whole and healthy. And I will leave no trace of his herd alive if he harms her.”

Celestia says, “I have had some dealings with his lawyer, Civil Hassler. I believe she could arrange something. Do you have any preferences as to location?”

“I don’t care, though I do wish I had full wings to rub his nose in how badly he has screwed up. Steel and Shining, if we are going to negotiate you can relax the blockade to simple observation.”

Celestia adds, “Look around. You’re doing better than you think.”

I look and they are small but fully shaped wings. I flexed them and grin.

“I guess that’s why I’m so hungry. Well, now you have at least until mid morning. I’m going to go get a big breakfast and make my debut among friends.”

It’s fitting that my first real public display of myself as an Alicorn is going to be my morning breakfast. These ponies have always been my friends and supporters.

I walk in to the cafeteria to a sudden hush and, about a second later, applause. At the order window I ask for a twelve egg, cheese, and chicken omelet with three bowls of oatmeal and two large fruit bowls. When they are ready, I tag them with my magic and head for a table with a veritable parade of food trays in tow. Steel walks in just then and laughs.

“Hey, the wings gotta come from somewhere.” I retort.

Most of the crowd laughs at that one. The world is better now. I still have my anchor.

After breakfast, I check in with Celestia. No news.

“Celestia, I haven’t meant to leave you out of the new methods. It’s just that we need a few hours of mind walking to get it all down and every time I try to set that up, shit happens. I’ll be with Luna today but maybe, if nothing happens, we can do something tonight. I need to show you some memories at the least.”

“And I have some things I need to show you. Some you might find useful. If we haven’t heard anything by nightfall, I think it will be safe enough.”

“I’ll see you then, at the latest.”

Luna is waiting for me in the kitchen.

“Have some tea, Stallion John.”

“Thank you my very very good Friend Luna.”

“Thy young wings be in sore need of attention.”

“I believe they have had a trying day. Even with tiny nubs I cannot deny the urge to sweep and soar with the rest of you. And that doesn’t count blasting through the mine.”

“’twere a rare sight, Friend John. Thou hast displayed an excellent mimicry of a volcano.”

We move to the main room so that I have space to spread my wing a little. The thought staggers me. My wings are growing that much.

“Thou art going to possess a magnificent spread, Stallion John. I dream of our dance among the clouds.”

“I do too, my Magnificent Mare. I have dreamed since shortly after arriving in Equestria. So much of this has a feeling of fate.”

“Remember, Friend John, that thou art in Equestria and in Equestria fate hath a name.”

“I understand that. But have you ever wondered why the summoning chose me? Maybe fate had some help from destiny.”

Time to move over a little so I can work on the other wing.

“Luna, this is a prime example. I’m sitting here as a talking equine preening my wings with my magic fingers while I discuss my destiny with a magical equine princess. Three years ago I would have laughed at any part of that statement as absurdly impossible. Today it’s not just completely normal for me but it feels like what was missing from my previous life. Equestria is my home at a level that Terra never was.

“Would this not be a part of thy great Oath?”

“You’ve got your cause and effect mixed. I wrote that oath because I wanted this result. I didn’t know that magic would enforce it for me but I fully intended to enforce it with my own will.”

Luna is saved from more of my introspection by the arrival of a Guard courier.

“Princess Celestia requests the presence of Prince John in Her private office as soon as possible.”

I return the courier’s salute and she leaves.

“Luna, I’ll bet you whatever you want to lose that a lawyer is ready to talk. I think I’ll go as human.”

I pull my small sword and clothes out of my wizard’s pocket and make the change. Then I dress and take off for the office.

Celestia is entertaining a middle aged Unicorn mare when I enter.

“Prince John, this is Civil Hassler, attorney for the Blueblood coalition.”

She bows and I nod then sit on the floor. That puts me at about her standing eyeball height.

Celestia speaks first, “John, there’s been a fire in Appleloosa that destroyed the County Assayer’s office and seriously injured the Assayer.”

“Really? Then I guess it’s good I made verifiable copies. And we can add arson to the list of crimes. What can I do for you, councilor?”

Celestia again, “She wants to know the exact nature of the disagreement between you and Blueblood.”

“What have you told her?”

“Nothing”

So I turn to the good counselor and unfold the entire story from crooked contracts to kidnapped mare with baited trap.

She smiles at me and said, “That’s a bunch rumor and innuendo. You have no proof that my client is involved in any of that.”

I stand and draw my sword. The counselor visibly shrinks as I turn the sword around and present the pommel to her.

“Remember this part of the story? I recovered this from the mine near Appleloosa, the mine your client signed off on as superintendent. I have complete images of your client with cutie visible claiming it as his mine just days before.”

“You couldn’t possibly . . .”

Sitting, I explain, “I just told you about the Earth pony that smoked five high level Unicorns in a head to head magic battle that lasted less than a minute. You don’t have the first clue what is possible for me. Swift’s safety and my respect for Celestia are the only things between your clients and total annihilation. It is very much in your clients’ best interest to get Swift back to me healthy and happy.”

“Can you actually prove any of that?”

“What would you consider an adequate demonstration?”

“How about a magic sparring with me?”

“Not in the Castle.”

“Can’t handle it?”

“Last time I magic sparred with Shining Armor, Colonel Steel stopped it because we were threatening the structure of the Castle. I promised not to do it again.”

“See what I mean? That’s just another wild claim.”

“We could have Shining and Steel here in minutes or you and I could pick a convenient open field.”

“Do you think you could stop me if I went after you?”

I kick in high speed, stand and step over the councilor lightly touching the tip of her horn. Then I drop my speed.

“Yes.”

I go back to where I was and sit down again.

“That represents almost two percent of possible. Would you like more demonstration? In fact, why don’t we have the next demonstration somewhere neutral and you can bring your client.”

“I’ll have to get back to you with his reply.”

“Don’t take too long.”

The learned lawyer exits the office and as soon as she is safely down the hall I get out of the scabbard and clothes. Going to A-Pony, I stuff it all in my wizard’s pocket and turn to Celestia.

“Damned, that feels so much better.”

“You look about ready to fly, John.”

“I feel past ready to fly but I can’t do it around here until we’re done with Blueblood. The bastard is just screwing up so many things in my life. Right now I feel like lunch and lunch and lunch. Would you like to eat and talk?”

“I would like that very much, John. What would you like to eat?”

“I’m easy. Anything with massive quantities of fish will satisfy me. The annoying part is not being able to go out right now.”

“How about we go to my kitchen and have five servings of fish and rice brought in.”

“You’ve got plenty of fruit already there?”

“Yes.”

“Lets go.”

We make ourselves comfortable at Celestia’s kitchen table and she jumps right in.

“What are these ‘new methods’ I keep hearing about? That old Unicorn was certainly impressed.”

“I just found a number of Terran techniques that can be used with Equestrian magic. I’ve adapted a file browser like used in my phone to organize memories. It can be learned in minutes and suddenly everypony has wizard class mind organization.”

The food arrives and I become distracted.

Celestia isn’t as diverted, “But how does that explain the things you can do that nopony else can do?”

“Look at me right now. I see my manipulation magic as invisible hands. It took a major mental adjustment for me to eat with magic. I have a lifetime of conditioning behind me that says that eating with your fingers is dirty. It makes no sense at all for magic but the mental block was substantial. You have some of those common to all Equestrians. I don’t because I didn’t grow up in Equestria. So I just do things for no other reason than nopony has told me I can’t. Magic doesn’t care. It goes where the will directs it.”

“So that’s what the old Unicorn meant when he said that you were the wizard that Equestria needs. You ignore the conventional wisdom and make your own way.”

“Yep. It’s exactly the same as your stallion problem. The noble herds just keep doing the same thing that grandpa did, even though it doesn’t work, until they’ve all descended to either mediocrity or madness and you have to look outside for a bloodline that can revive Equestria.

“And you, more than anything else, are looking for a vacation. That’s why you keep throwing that ‘deity’ label at me. I’m going to be the new sun god so you can sleep in for the first time in over a thousand years. What you missed is that your summoning was better than you expected. Anypony that is capable of taking care of a whole world for a thousand years without a break is my kind of pony. I have always had a compulsion to take care of others and keep them safe. That’s what I did on Terra at a very high wizard equivalent rank. So I don’t mind spelling you in the daily grind. Now you can settle down while we work on the details of the rest of our relationship.”

“What are you trying to tell me, John?”

“I’m trying to tell you that you can trust me and rely on me. I accept the nomination to adoptive parent for Equestria. I feel myself growing into the role. You can relax and start planning some relief for yourself. What I want is for your trust to grow enough to let me in to your heart. That’s what will make the millennia bearable.”

“Now I understand. You want to be co ruler and co deity and live with me every day but you want to take your time with our relationship and dance our complex dance so we can draw the fun out for centuries.”

“Pretty close. As a side issue I also have obligations to Luna, Twilight, AJ, and Swift that I won’t walk away from.”

“I don’t think I could trust you if you did. And, after all, you are a stallion. We have agreement.”

“Good, now I want to go flying. Have you noticed how intimidating Alicorns can be with their size and wingspread? When we go to meet Blueblood, I want us to fly in and land damned near on top of him as the all powerful Rulers of Equestria come to solve his problem. It will set the tone for any negotiation and me in full Alicorn mode should shock the shit out of him. We just need to do it out of sight so we don’t spoil the surprise.”

“We can take care of that.”

And we are back in a familiar courtyard. I take a final look at my borrowed memories, turn to face the wind, open my wings to their full span, and feel the wind. No thought is required. I raise, cup, sweep and I’m forty yards from the ground. I sweep again and again. The castle looks small way down there but I don’t care. I have the complete freedom of the sky and life is good. Celestia is coming up behind me. I'm not going to let it happen. I tuck and dive kicking in the gliding pony thrust. I’m going very fast when I pull up just above the trees and leave shredded vegetation in my wake. Celestia is ‘that’ way so I loop around and drop to a glide as I pass her.

“John, what in the hell are you doing?”

“Having fun?”

“I mean how are you going so fast without using wings?”

“I’m using wings. You just don’t need as much wing when you go fast. I collapse my wings as the speed increases so that I maintain just enough wing to provide lift. That reduces the drag and lets me go faster. I’m using gliding pony thrust for power. I almost went mach but I decided to put that off for another day.”

“Went mach?”

“Terran term. Means exceed the speed of sound.”

“John, professional stunt fliers train for years and dream of doing it. You did it in your first five minutes?”

“My way only works for Alicorns. You need wings and levitation at the same time.”

“Oh. This is another of those ‘because nopony told me you couldn’t’ moments, isn’t it?”

“Yep. It also happens to be how Terran aircraft work. I’m going to go practice dramatic landings.”

I arrived at a combination of levitation and wing that is controllable and likely to blow bystanders off their feet.

Celestia is waiting at the spot where we arrived, “Ready?”

“Yes. And thanks. This has done wonders for my psyche.”

When we get back a message is waiting.

The good counselor and Blueblood want to meet at a restaurant in Canterlot just after sundown.

I ask Celestia, “Do we know anything about this place?”

She replies, “It’s an open courtyard with streets all around and a kitchen behind.”

“Not very private. Not much way to sneak either. He will try to provoke something with witnesses all around. Can we send somepony in and reserve the whole place?”

“He’s probably already done that.”

“Let’s make sure. It will be ideal for our grand entrance.”

The courier returns to report that the Royal Herd has reserved the entire restaurant with the lawyer and party listed as guests and has comped dinners for everypony bumped.

It is time. We go to the balcony and Celestia performs her evening duty then we launch off the balcony and over Canterlot. Celestia is leading and will make the first landing. There is a large crowd gathered on the street. I guess word got around from the displaced diners. Celestia glides in and walks through the gate. I follow almost as gracefully. Blueblood and his councilor are seated at the center table.

As we walk up the counselor asks, “When will John Sampson be here?”

I reply, “Prince John is here.”

She looks around, “Where?”

“Right here in mid demonstration. Remember when I told you that you didn’t have a clue what I was capable of.”

She’s looking me over carefully now, “Is this real?”

“Completely. Remember my Oath? I’m the best pony I can possibly be. I chose that because pony is what I want to be. And I ascended the old fashion way, by my own hard work and skill.”

She switches to Celestia, “Do you verify this, Your Majesty?”

Celestia replies, “Yes I do. I took his original Oath and recognized his potential as a world class wizard then. It has been very exciting watching him grow into his pony persona. I don’t know if I’m strong enough to sever all ties with the universe of my birth and start the process of becoming an Alicorn all over again in a strange land. He did it.”

She turns back to me, “I want to apologize, Your Majesty. When you started casually making statements about having strong enough magic to threaten the structure of the Castle, I never imagined anything like this.”

I respond, “No problem. We’ve been keeping it in the Herd for good reasons. This is my public debut.”

Celestia has had enough, “None of this is why we are here. What do you two have to offer to settle our dispute?”

Blueblood responds, “What dispute? All I know about is your attacks on my properties. I just want you to leave me alone.”

I ask, “So you deny holding Duchess Captain Swift Trail hostage to lure me into a trap?”

He sneered, “Of course I do and you can’t prove different.”

I smile, “Wanna bet?” I called my small sword out of my wizard’s pocket and reversed it.

“I found that in the bottom of your mine along with an image of Swift. It was in Swift’s saddle bags when she was abducted. Celestia tracked it by the sigil. She can testify to that.”

He is defiant, “Even if all that is true, I have holdings all over Equestria. Anypony could have trespassed on a mine I’ve never even seen in person and you can’t prove otherwise.”

Turning to Civil Hassler, “I can show it to you in detail if you would care to take a little mind walk.”

She looks skeptical.

I nod at Celestia, “Celestia is here to insure that both of us stay safe. Do you trust her?”

She nods, “Go ahead.”

I start at landing on the hill and play the entire mine incident through to sorting the old Assayer’s memories then I play his memories of Blueblood registering and certifying the mine.

“There’s a lot more like it. We can drag them all out if you want to make a Court out of it.”

She turns to Blueblood, “Make a deal. You’re way over your head already.”

Blueblood asks, “What do you want, Princess?”

Celestia replies, “I want you to stop stealing but the aggrieved party today is Prince John.”

He turns to me, “How much do you want?”

I reply, “I want one . . . pony. I want Swift healthy and happy.”

He thinks a moment, “What guarantees do I have that you will leave me alone?”

“Look at me. This is the kind of strength my oaths have. My word is more than enough.”

He’s getting crafty, “How would the exchange be made?”

“You teleported her out, just go get her and bring her back here. And remember that she has my oath too.”

He’s beginning to get creepy, “And I get to keep all my money and all my other mares?”

“Just as a matter of curiosity, how many other mares do you have?”

“Other than this one, twenty eight. But we have plenty of time to go before spring.”

“Damned, that’s a crowd. How do you keep that many in your house?”

“Oh, they’re not here. I’ve got a big secure place to keep them out in the country.”

“How big are your balls? I’ll put my mares against your mares in a good old fashion stallion challenge.”

“How many mares you got?”

“Counting the one I’m here to get, six. I prefer quality to quantity. Besides, I don’t have to keep them when I’ve got Royal Privilege.”

“And if I beat you I get Royal Privilege?”

“Yep. Now all we need is a big enough place to gather all the mares and have room to fight.”

“I’ll send a message for you when it’s ready. Bring all of your mares and bring that cunt too. She might as well be yours for all the good she’s done me.”

And he teleports out.

I sum it up, “That pony is not sane.”

John Sampson's Story (Epilog )

I remember everything now, my ‘Bud’ life and my ‘John’ life. All of my bodies are at my disposal including one I didn’t expect. It’s labeled ‘14’. Celestia is looking at me with a mixture of hope and dread. I shift to A-Pony.

“Yes, Celestia, I’m back. I don’t know where we are going from here. I’ve grown some since the anger was on me and I’ve also become more cautious. I’m going to see some old friends and make some new ones before I decide anything. I’ll let you know.”

I teleport out to the main courtyard and look up.

“Hello old friend. It’s been a while.”

The day suddenly seems brighter and happier. I feel energy surging through me.

“Slowly, my friend, slowly. I don’t want to get too far ahead of my ponies. That’s what screwed Celestia up.”

I can feel understanding and love. I am the strongest Alicorn in Equestria and I have my human tech plus a fourteen band horn in reserve. I have all of the time in the world, literally. What I need is a few friends. But first, I launch straight up into the sky. I few good sweeps and I’m circling Canterlot. This is where I belong.

Author's Note

There is more.

https://www.fimfiction.net/story/446926/john-sampson-returns