I Don't Even WANT To Fuck You!

Chapters

First Impressions
So You Two Aren't Really Besties
But Maybe?
Okay, A Tsundere Fuck is Good Enough

First Impressions

Having to wear a suit was bullshit.

Sure, Rarity tailored it well, and despite being a little itchy, it was actually pretty comfortable and form-fitting, but the fact you had to put the entire three-piece on in the first place was just plain ridiculous. You grumbled to yourself as you fiddled with the small black bowtie you’d been given to go along with the outfit. After three attempts to tie the damned thing and three failures, you threw it away in a fit of petulance and focussed on donning your waistcoat.

Why did you need a bowtie anyways? You weren’t a freaking butler.

Not that you were that far off of being one at the moment, but let’s not get into semantics. Or your living condition.

Or the fact that Twilight considers ‘almost as useful as Spike’ as a term of endearment.

Anyways, Twilight had insisted you wear something smart today, and all you knew was that there was some kind of dignitary coming for a visit. Probably someone snotty and important, someone who was going to look at you in your finery and nod in approval despite likely wearing next to nothing themselves.

Honestly, if it wasn’t for how weird and cold it’d be, you’d insist to walk around in the buff all the time just to prove a point to these ponies.

But no, you weren’t about to go out for an impromptu protest streaking session, so you instead went back to buttoning up your blazer and putting on your belt. You had to hand it to Rarity, she’d acclimated to human attire and style incredibly quickly once you’d explained it to her. This actually looked like a very stylish suit. Also, apparently, cashmere was humanely shorn in Equestria, so you didn’t feel like a dick for wearing it.

Well, apart from how much of a dick you felt for being the only one around wearing a damn suit, but whatever. You weren’t going to complain any more about the suit. You were just going to put it on, get downstairs and—

Fuck, it itches!

But also feels kinda nice. You couldn’t complain too much. You hardly paid for it.

But yeah, teeth brushed, hair combed, beard trimmed, everything on point, or at least as close to it as you could get in the twenty minutes between being woken up and the guest being due to arrive. Truthfully, you sprayed your hair with dry shampoo. No, you weren’t ashamed.

At least you smelled alright.

Twilight had said something about this before, mentioned that someone would be coming to the castle, staying for a little while, and then fucking off, but you hadn’t paid much attention then. Truthfully, you didn’t care all that much now, but you’d do your best to represent Twilight properly, at the very least. You’d had to meet a few nobles and other important figures since your time staying with Twilight, and with a couple of exceptions, all of them had been imperious, insufferably rude pompous cunts.

Time to add another to the list. You dragged yourself downstairs with a light thud of sluggish, rebellious feet hitting floor. Your legs didn’t want to move. They wanted their last two hours of rest. Your brain didn’t want to deal with another day of putting on a dignified air and pretending you gave a shit about whatever it was that mister or miss rich and important had to say about themselves. Twilight said this one wouldn’t be so bad, you remembered that much, but she said that about every one of these meetings.

She also said that it was important you be there if she wanted to make a good impression. Twilight said a lot of things, and they were often laced with an assurance that everything would be fine in the end. Didn’t stop her from profusely apologising whenever one of these fuckers left.

But she was good to you, and honestly, she was incredibly sweet, so you put up with it. You didn’t have such a bad gig, after all.

You cleared your throat as you walked down the corridor, testing your voice. You always had to get that little bit of inner-city gruff out of it before meeting one of these ponies, make sure that your tone was measured, your words sophisticated, and your countenance soft and accommodating. Basically, you had to act like someone you weren’t for hours. Almost reminded you of retail work.

You checked your gait too. Made sure you weren’t walking in too relaxed of a manner, which would be unbecoming, but also weren’t making large strides, as that could be intimidating to these thigh high horses. It was too much to remember at first, but you’d gotten used to altering every last bit of yourself for the purpose of shit like this. At least you got to bitch in your head.

When you finally entered the castle’s throne room, you found Twilight to be waiting there. You took the seat beside her, giving her a weak wave hello.

“I hope you’ve woken up properly by now.” She gave him a warm smile. “I’m sorry that I had to get you up so suddenly, anon, but I honestly have no clue what time our guest is going to arrive. They’re not exactly one for doing things conventionally…”

That struck you as odd. “Everyone else we do this with is as ‘conventional’ as they come, Twilight.” You raised an eyebrow. “Hell, I can hardly tell them apart by face most of the time, let alone name.” A beat. “You’ve had to actively remind me that the Mayor of Trottingham and the Marquess of Stalliongrad are different ponies on numerous occasions—”
“They’re different colours!”

“Oh, pfft. They’re both yellow, don’t lie to me.”

Hold on. That wasn’t racist, was it?

...some ponies were pink. The one you were talking to currently was purple. Its co-leaders were a white and black female. You were fairly certain it wasn’t racist.

“One of them is a stallion!” Twilight persisted, interrupting your ethical dilemma before you could begin to actually care.

“Really? Just one of them? Then the Mayor of Stalliongrad is a really effeminate stallion.”

“That one’s the mare!” Twilight all but growled.

“Then the other one’s a butch lesbian! What do you want from me?!” You were actually beginning to feel real exertion now. And somewhere, just somewhere, you were beginning to feel that regal facade and decorum you were meant to be maintaining slip just a modicum. You sighed, adjusting your tie and counting down from ten in your head.

Twilight, meanwhile, looked as if she was attempting to fight off an aneurysm. “You done yet? Any other colourful remarks you want to get out of your system before our guest arrives?”

“Always.” Just as you were about to draw from a very long mental list, you heard an extremely loud pounding at the door. You exchanged glances with Twilight, who suddenly looked awfully worried. “...Twilight, did this guest bring a battering ram to introduce themselves with?”

A sheepish smile, and Twilight wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead. “Nope, that’ll just be her knocking.”

You looked out into the hallway, then, not a moment later, heard once again the sound that made your balls shrivel up into your stomach. “That sound came from a she?”

“I was going to talk this over with you before she arrived but… did you actually read the brief on Princess Ember that I left for you a couple of nights ago?”

Oh, so that was her name. Remember that. Didn’t even realise there was another princess in Equestria until now, besides the few you already knew of. “Oh, that was for me?”

You were a bad liar. Twilight rolled her eyes. “It said ‘For Anon’ on the front.”

“Must’ve missed it.”

“It was written in big, bold letters and taped to your bedroom door.”

“So’s my Equestrian Tax Form, and I still haven’t done that.”

Twilight actually stopped short. “I can’t believe you. You realise that this means I’m now going to have to fill in and file all of your earnings and taxes working under me for the last two months if I want these in by the end of tax season?”

You narrowed your eyes and looked to her, the two of you stopping dead on the path to the door. “You’re worrying about this now?”

Twilight was slowly tapping her hooves against the floor, looking as if she was about to break out in a sprint on the spot. “Sorry. Just a little excited.” She looked to him with a wide smile. “You’re forgiven for not looking it over, just…”

“Just?” Suddenly, you had the distinct feeling that you should’ve actually taken the time to read about your guest, just this once.

“Just don’t be surprised if she’s a little too much for you.” Twilight actually seemed a little amused now. You weren’t sure you liked that. Her sense of humour was purposely false equations and Spike falling over, from what you’d seen.

One last thunderous knock, and you gave a shrug. Couldn’t be that bad, surely. Hell, you’d met Discord a couple of times by now and actually found him to be a pretty reasonable—if nutty—dude. What could some snooty, heavy-hooved asshole be in comparison to the guy that offered you ‘a sip of asbestos’ when you met him?”

In polite, sophisticated manner, you took point for Twilight. You strode out in front of her, giving her a small nod of reassurance, and then opened the door, clearing the way for the visitor and whatever entourage they might have had. You stood back, inclining your head just enough to classify a bow, and waited for the sound of hooves walking past.

You heard none. For a few moments, there was silence, and then: “Star—err, Twilight, what’s that thing holding the door for me, and why is it dressed like a piano?”

You looked down at your white suit and black waistcoat/bowtie combo and suddenly felt very insecure. You’d heard the human comment often enough, but that last one? This was your only nice suit! Yeah, you hated wearing it but, hey, screw her!

But of course, you didn’t even look up, not yet. It wasn’t your place to argue, or punch this pony, or really do anything but be the good assistant and keep a smile on your face.

Twilight sounded like she was biting back her own testy response. If she, the embodiment of all friendship and good, could control herself, then you’d lead by example. “Ember, this is Anon. He’s a human, a race native to a planet called Earth. He currently lives with and works for me, and is a good friend. Anon, this is—”

“Well, how’d he get here?” This Ember, she was rather insistent.

“Wow, you’re the first person to ask that in a while,” Twilight answered, bemused. “Usually, we just kind of brush over the whole ‘how he arrived’ and ‘how he acclimated’ portion of Anon’s origin, including any unnecessary backstory, and simply assume he’s a somewhat well-adjusted and friendly individual that is now moderately familiar with life here.” Twilight paused for a second. “Yup, that seems to tick all the boxes.”

“Well, that’s stupid. Someone should question how he actually arrived in the first place. I’ve never heard of a ‘human’ before and I wanna know how he got here.”

“Really gonna make me do this, huh?” Twilight looked at you for support. You wouldn’t notice, as you were still looking at the floor as you were supposed to. You were also curious as to how you got here. You never really got super filled in in scenarios like this either. Twilight took a deep breath. “Well… in theory, the entire displacement was predicated by a snap in Equus’ mana circuitry, and a shift in the accompanying leylines that distribute—”

“Twilight, I was just trying to be polite, but this is really boring. Cut to the chase. Are there going to be more of him?”

“...maybe?”

“Alright, cool. You can stop now.”

Twilight channelled the author. “Thank you.” A beat. “Anyways, Anon, this is Ember.”

Finally, you could look up, ordeal over with and little of substance gained, and… it was a dragon.

A fucking girl dragon.

Like, Jesus, really?

She stood on two legs like you, had a rather standoffish posture, like she’d rather be anywhere else, but a smile on her face all the time, like she was genuinely happy to see Twilight. Then, she looked at you, and she just looked… curious. Like, the kind of reluctant curiosity one might have had when admiring a pretty picture despite the fact they’d always said fine art is for poncy twats.

You were drawing on your own experience. Also, this dragon had tits. And she didn’t wear much to conceal them. Unlike her hard-scaled shoulders and sides, the flesh of her breasts and underbelly—barely concealed by a tight translucent leotard—looked remarkably soft.

Should dragons have had tits? You’d leave that debate for the fantastical herpetologists.

You weren’t really complaining about the tits, though. You were kinda staring at them, however. This was the first time you’d seen tits since you got here (apart from that one time Discord made his own, it was awkward), and on a bipedal creature too. You were naturally more than a little excited.

It took Twilight clearing her throat for you to realise that the two of you had simply been staring at each other for a good ten seconds now, a palpable tension rising in the room. You decided to break it before you started to pitch a tent or suggest the two of you abscond and form a dragonborn super-race together by putting out your hand to shake. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Princess Ember.”

“Yeah, sure.” She walked straight past you, though you could swear she looked back at you for just a moment. “Twilight, do you still have any castle walls you don’t need? The journey worked me up a killer appetite.”

Okay, sure, she was hot, but she was also an absolute bitch. Which was… kinda hot too?

“No part of this castle is spare, Ember, but I did make sure to free up a large stockpile of gems for your visit. Shall we go to the dining room? I laid out a spread in your honour.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it.” God, she was so casual. She took off with Twilight, rather than you leading the procession as usual, and you were about to move yourself to the front to make sure you could do all the usual opening of doors and pulling out of chairs, but you found yourself transfixed by one tight dragon ass, which, like the rest of Ember’s assets, was on full display.

She had a long, slender tail with a slightly curved end, short ‘v’ shaped patterns racing up it, and beneath, the kind of behind you might expect to see on a human supermodel. Sure, she was like, a foot and a half shorter than you, but her proportions were like that of a human in almost every way. Curvaceous yet firm, plump in the behind but toned all the while, and very little fat to speak of. Swap out the scales for skin and lose the wings and horns, and she could likely rock any catwalk on Earth. Hell, even with those changes, she’d more than likely make it.

Your head lightly shook as you walked behind the pair of them, your eyes drifting back to her behind all the while. The two of them spoke about serious things that you weren’t interested in, but from the sounds of things, Ember wasn’t either. Twilight would be her polite self, and Ember would shrug and offer short, non-committal replies. Yeah, she might not have been all hoity-toity, but she still seemed to think everyone was beneath her, and that irked you all the same.

When you were about halfway to the dining room, you felt a sharp tap against your side, and realised all too late it was the slap of Ember’s tail.

She’d stopped walking, and it was all you could do to plant your feet against the floor and stop yourself from walking completely into her. You instinctively went to rub at your pained side, wincing a little, and undid the tight knit of your eyebrows before you could let slip that you were giving her evils, because you most definitely were. “I-I’m sorry, is there a problem, princess?”

Twilight turned on the pair of you very rapidly, but stayed silent. She looked as if she could be ready to sidestep an impending war any second now, and it was all too late dawning on you that this was a very powerful guest. Probably wouldn’t do you or Twilight well if you’d somehow found a way to piss off a dragon princess. You waited for her next words with a tight chest and rebellious lungs.

“Is there something you like down there?” She raised an eyebrow, and with a swift movement of her tail—which brushed away over your hand, you could now confirm it was soft as fuck—and swiveled around in an impressive display of flexibility to point at her own ass. Oh no. Your own doom was being spelt out to you by a big blue fucking arrow. “Your eyes have not left my backside for the last two minutes. I mean, at first, I just figured ponies do that because they’re all so short, but you’re huge, and you’re still looking at it, so what gives? Is it just a pony custom, or whatever, or is there something you like down there?”

“Uhh…” You looked to Twilight, who had no fucking answers for you. In fact, she looked busy trying to comprehend the idea that you’d even been doing that. Hell, you thought you’d been super clandestine. “Uhm, I…” Seriously, what did you say here?! ‘Yes, I’m a pervert, arrest me.’ ‘No, you’re wrong, how dare you insinuate such a thing?’ You didn’t see either of those options defusing the situation, and were getting ready to simply find a window to jump out of when Ember let out a snicker.

“Uhh, erm…” she mimicked you with a roll of her eyes, before batting you again with her tail, lightly this time, and turning back around. “Idiot. For such a big boy, you really don’t have a backbone, do you?”

You actually grit your teeth at that. She might not have seen it, but Twilight did, as she did pretty much implore you with her eyes not to snap and bite Ember’s head off in turn. After all, yeah, that’d probably have ramifications, and you were staring.

Just a little though. Semi-justifiably.

Surely. When was the last time you saw an ass like that?

Still, she was certainly trying to wind you up. But you weren’t going to bite. You knew better than to do that, and that was mainly because you didn’t know just what could happen if you were to turn around and say what was on your mind. You imagined it wouldn’t be pleasant.

The rest of the walk to the dining room was rather quiet, though you did your best to keep your eyes off of Ember (who apparently had a pair in the back of her head) as you walked, not wanting to repeat the same mistake from earlier. As it turned out, the more effort you put into not checking her out, the more difficult it became to refrain. Who would’ve thought?

So You Two Aren't Really Besties

You arrived at the dining room, mare and dragoness in tow, and Twilight had really put out a spread. It was all gems and daisy sandwiches, of course, as Twilight couldn’t cook for shit, bless her, but you supposed the food wasn’t exactly for you. Part of you wondered what it would be like to chow down on a big chunk of crystal. The rest of you valued your teeth too much.

Come to think of it, the crystal addicts of your world didn’t value their teeth much either.

Ember was rather non-committal as she sat down, no grace, no waiting on ceremony, and when you attempted to hold a seat out for her, she scoffed at you. “I can do it myself,” she grunted, eyeing you like some kind of annoyance before planting herself in the seat and lurching forwards, causing an ear-slicing scraaape across the marble floor.

Twilight gave you a little shrug, eyes pleading, and you ignored the urge to cuss her out for your friend-slash-employer’s sake. You did hold out Twilight’s seat for her and tuck her in though. It felt nice doing nice things for ponies that actually appreciated it. You remained standing to the side of Twilight, who was at the head of the table, if only because you were scared your weight might make tinder of a pony chair. Your eyes fell on the pair of them—Twilight daintily picking at her sandwich in lieu of pleasantries—and then darting to Ember.

She took a small taste of one of the red gems on her platter—you imagined it to be a ruby. It was only when she’d placed the shard in her mouth, gently suckled on the end of it, as if appraising it, then given the end a small bite that you finally saw something change in her eyes.

You were caught between two conflicting notions that fought for control of your brain. On the one hand, here was this hot dragon bitch who liked to spend her time sucking on gems, and you couldn’t help but appreciate the way her lips and forked tongue moved as she licked and lapped at the edge of it in a way that you could only describe as intentionally inappropriate.

Then a smirk, and you watched her chomp down on the edge of it. You could almost swear she glanced at you the moment she did it. You winced involuntarily. Was she still pissed about the whole ass staring thing?

Or was this how dragons flirted?

But that wasn’t the most interesting part. One bite of a gem led to another, and all the while, you could see a spark beginning to rise in this creature that until now had seemed entirely disinterested and annoyed by everything around her, save Twilight. She seemed to restrain it, if only for a moment, but eventually, it was too much, and a long ‘mmph’ carried from the base of her throat, the sound carrying a pleasant, warm and husky tone.

Yes, it made the hairs on your arms prick. Luckily, your prick didn’t prick.

A strange contrast ensued. While Twilight sat there in abject discomfort, attempting not to cringe at the display that came forth, Ember lost herself to her meal, the spike of her id overpowering everything else, impulses unleashed. She ate in a fervour, choking down one precious gem after another, sometimes multiple at once, and all the while, between bites, her ravenous smile only grew.

You couldn’t decide whether it was cute or perturbing. You were pretty sure the only reason you weren’t fearing you’d be her next meal is because you still had a couple of feet on her.

...that said, she had a pretty fucking hard bite to her, and could most likely breathe fire. You weren’t sure if you fancied your chances.

But something about that? You liked something about that, and even if you’d seen little in redeeming qualities from this girl in the minutes you’d known her—in fact, you’d only seen negatives—something in you appreciated watching her enjoy herself, especially after her presenting such an abrasive front earlier.

When she had finally finished eating, she still bore a smile, but it seemed relaxed. Placated. Almost a little vulnerable. You were sure you liked that.

Twilight looked relieved, too. “You liked your meal, I take it?”

A Cheshire grin. “Oh yeah, it was fucking spectacular. You really spoiled me, Twilight, thanks a lot.”

Okay, that was different. Like, really different. Words like that were the ones you spent most of your time thinking in your head and not so much saying out loud, because ponies don’t swear much. The slight momentary discomfort on Twilight’s face gave away that she’d hardly expected it, and even you, curse word extraordinaire, had your mouth agape. Wasn’t this meant to be a diplomatic meeting between two dignified leaders?

Then Ember let out a belch. Like, a legitimate ‘urrrp’ as she rubbed at her small, soft belly. You thought you might be in love with her.

More than anything, the way her tone changed was unreal. Had she just been hangry all along?

“I’m… I’m really glad you enjoyed it!” Twilight was being genuine. You could see the mixture of relief and happiness that she’d managed to do something well for a friend flooding her face, and while it was cute and all, for once, you thought you might have found something that interested you more. Namely, the tough as nails dragon girl that still knew how to smile and say ‘thank you’.

You never would’ve guessed her capable of either until now.

“Hey, ebony and ivory,” Ember pointed at you, motioned you over with an incline of her claw. And hell, you were just about to hazard a genuine smile. You actually thought she might be okay. She had to ruin it, didn’t she?

You forced a grin nonetheless. “What is it, your highness?”

“Oh, quit all of that. It’s insufferable. I’m only a princess when I wanna be.” She tilted her head. “Why aren’t you eating? You’re just… stood there, like a piece of furniture.” She snorted, a small giggle sounding. “Like a piano, come to think of it.”

She wasn’t going to let that up anytime soon, was she? “It’s not my place to sit and eat with the two of you,” you said, trying to remember your practiced air of class. “I’m only the help. I can take your dishes if you’re done with them, however?”

“That’s stupid,” Ember said matter-of-factly. “You’re a big boy, you should have something to eat too. Why don’t you try something from the table?”

You looked to Twilight to save you. “Erm, Ember? Anon can’t really eat gems, just like a pony couldn’t, and he can’t eat plants like daisies, either. They just don’t have the right kind of stomach for digesting it.”

Ember raised an eyebrow. “Okay, so what do you eat, and why isn’t it here with the rest of the food?”

Twilight raised a hoof, lip bitten. “Well, typically, he—”

“I think he can speak for himself, Twilight. I asked him.” Her large, crystalline eyes focussed on you intently. “Tell me about yourself, human. I’m kinda curious, but only a little.”

Twilight looked taken aback, and you were equally shocked. The idea that a visitor would even have any real interest in talking to him specifically, rather than just speaking about him, regarding him as some kind of ornamental oddity, was absurd in both of their books. You cleared your throat, emotions bouncing back to ‘pretty content with this’. “Well, I mostly eat meat, fish, and greens, maybe a little dairy here and there, but—”

“Ponies are alright with meat eaters, then?” Ember’s eyes were a little wider than usual, as if the discovery was a big deal. “I always assumed that they didn’t like the whole killing and eating thing, considering they don’t do it themselves.”

Twilight looked slightly pale all of a sudden, and for once, you were happy to answer for her. “They’ve gotten used to being around races like griffons, who are entirely carnivorous. That’s where I get my meat from, actually, griffon traders that come by. Yeah, it’s not something that’s exactly popular in Equestrian culture, but it’s hardly illegal either. A lot of ponies don’t like it, is all.”

“I was always a little scared by the dragons that ate cattle and wild animals when I was younger…” the moment that escaped Ember’s mouth, she clamped a hand over it, cheeks redenning. “I-I mean, yeah, until I tasted my first—umm—morsel.”

She didn’t look entirely convinced that was the right word. You were nowhere near convinced that she’d ever tasted meat a day in her life. Also, she looked incredibly adorable whilst blushing. You shouldn’t have, you knew you shouldn’t have, but you decided to have a little fun with this. “So, what was that like? Your first kill, I mean.”

Somewhere in the background of both your peripherals and your thoughts, Twilight looked quite faint. You were seriously going to have to apologise to her for this later.

That said, Ember didn’t look much better. Rather than going through the intense discolouration that Twilight was, she was growing increasingly cherry red. Her tail flicked and she stuttered in a false start. “I… it was—” She looked like a beetroot. You fought the urge to laugh. You heard a growl emanating from the base of her throat. You had to imagine that she would like her first to be you at this point. “It was a glorious hunt.” She nodded to herself, as if to affirm credibility. “Three days and nights in pursuit, and then I cornered the beast.”

You leaned in, not even having to feign interest. This was gold. “What was it that you were hunting? Who were you with? I’m curious as to the specifics, princess.”

“It was a…” Ember seemed to mentally flick through the list of both mythological and barnyard animals then, as she was really stalling her reply. She was clearly uncomfortable, and you were starting to wonder whether you were pushing things a little too far here.

After all, how could you complain about insufferable dignitaries when you too were being a dick?

“A salamander!” Ember buzzed, her eyes lighting up with confidence. “It was a salamander.” All too quickly, she forgot she was meant to be nonchalant one, and began to pick her teeth with a gemstone, playing it as cool as she could. “Pretty gamey, to be honest.”

Twilight couldn’t help but pipe up. “Aren’t salamanders incredibly rare, with almost impenetrable hides?”

The previous self-assurance was a ghost on Ember’s face now. “I…”

Ah, fuck it. You’ve amused yourself enough. “Twilight, we probably shouldn’t question the princess too much. I’ve already been asking a ton of questions here.”

Twilight instantly looked as if she’d trodden on a splinter. She recoiled with a gasp. “O-oh, sorry. My mistake, anon is right. It’s very impressive that you were able to hunt a salamander, Ember.”

You could tell the word ‘hunt’ was anathema to Twilight, and you could just as well tell that everyone apart from you was made uncomfortable by this conversation. Still, the fact that you’d managed to get away with prodding Ember like that? Enjoy having the tables turned, bitch!

You looked to her, still internally gloating, but… the satisfaction wasn’t there. The happy but imputent dragon from earlier only seemed awkward and embarrassed now, attempting to move the conversation to a place where she couldn’t be cross-analysed. She looked at you with some mixture of annoyance and wonder, and her eyes seemed to linger for longer than they should’ve.

Maybe she really was planning to murder you. Hopefully not.

Pleasantries were reestablished, and this time, Ember didn’t make such an active attempt to fight them. She might’ve been worried that you’d try to trip her up again. She seemed to be cautious in her conversation, which seemed uncharacteristic for someone who up until now had really said and done whatever the hell she wanted.

And so you decided to back off a bit. Seeing her like this wasn’t fun for you at all. Teasing didn’t make you feel nearly as good about yourself as you’d hoped it might’ve, and the more you watched this dragoness speak and listen, the more you wanted to be a part of the conversation again. She’d taken an interest in you. She’d approached you in an unconventional manner, and treated you with… psuedo-respect? More than the nobles had given you, certainly.

And now she just seemed vacant, like she was only half in the room.

Everything spiralled back into motion when Twilight jolted up with a start. “Oh! Oh, oh gosh.” She looked between the two of you, shaking her head to herself all the while. “Oh no… I’ve just remembered that I’m meant to be peer marking student assessments for the school today!”

Anon.

You looked to Twilight as you heard her voice, but she was still rambling on about all of the things she supposedly needed to do at the school to Ember. Teacher training and safety inspection both made the list, which was odd as you could’ve sworn Twilight hadn’t mentioned either lately.

Anon. Listen to me.

“What is it?”

The two of them stopped and looked at you as if to say ‘what are you talking about’ before going back to their conversation. “Can’t these things wait a few hours?” Ember asked, eyebrow raised. “I did come a long way to meet you here today.”

I don’t really have to go and do all of this organisational stuff.

You… just really want to? A beat. Twilight, are you in my head?

Yes. It’s the only way I could talk to you without Ember hearing.

Okay.You paused. Don’t look at the porn.

I’ll pretend I didn’t.

Twilight was still rambling on to Ember as the two of you were having this telepathic conversation. She could multitask like a motherfucker. You could barely take a shit and ruminate on your life at the same time. So… why are you going to the school? You know, apart from the fact that you clearly want to.

Even through her flurry of bullshit to Ember, you saw a blush develop on Twilight’s case, and knew it was from your comment. I don’t! I mean… maybe a little, but that’s not the point. I just want you to… spend a little time with Ember. Do me a favour and give her a chance.

You had to prevent yourself from tilting your head. It was difficult to not respond when something this weird was happening. It didn’t feel like a thought with Twilight’s voice, either. It was kinda like a strong bassy thing that bounced around your noggin. Why do you want me to stay with her? She clearly doesn’t like me.

You heard Twilight giggle-snort in your head. She also seemed to do it in reality, which threw Ember for a spin. Just trust me, Anon. I know friendship. And the way that Ember looks at you? That’s friendship.

You stole a glance at Ember. She eyed you up like a particularly juicy steak.

...right.

Honestly, Anon. I know she comes across as hostile, but do you remember what you were like when we first met?

You thought back. There was a lot of swearing and shouting and denial about the whole magical horse thing. You thought you’d been slipped PCP or something. Point taken. I really don’t think we’re going to get along, though.

If I’m wrong, I’ll clean your room for a week.

You put a finger to your chin. If you’re wrong, you have to eat with chopsticks for an entire day.

Deal?

A devious smirk. Without magic.

...deal. Don’t start a war while I’m gone. I’m trusting you.

“—luckily, Anon is happy to show you around the castle while I’m gone, aren’t you Anon?”

You blinked, trying not to seem like someone who had just been conspiring. “Err… yeah!” Manners. “Yes, of course I am. It would be my pleasure to.”

“I’ve seen most of this castle before…” Ember stopped in her tracks for a moment. She looked at you, stole another glance at Twilight, and then nodded. “It’s fine. If you have things to do, I’m not going to make you stick around all day for my sake. I’m sure the human can find a way to keep me occupied.”

“Wonderful!” Twilight beamed at the pair of you, nodding ecstatically as she began to back out of the room. “Now, I really need to get going, have fun you guys, bye!”

And like that, she was gone, and it was just you and the angry dragon.

Author's Note

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But Maybe?

Ember's eyes bored into you. “So, we’re going for a tour, it seems?”

You could almost taste the disdain in her voice. “You really want to do that?”

Her countenance broke. “No!” A huff. “I could tell Twilight was lying through her teeth. Did I scare her off? Was it the whole hunting thing? Because I wasn’t even telling the—the… the most grisly parts.”

Poor thing. She’d seemed like such a strong and confident princess, and it almost felt like you’d managed to reduce her to less than that with your comments. Granted, she hadn’t been an angel herself, but did you really need to goad her so much? She hardly seemed the most secure.

You hazarded a smile. “You know, us humans aren’t exactly hunters ourselves. We’re meat eaters, but we farm animals. Raise docile livestock for slaughter, no danger or real sadism involved. I hope I didn’t give you the wrong impression.”

Ember simply chewed on a finger for a moment, taking in your words. “The way you pushed me for answers earlier, I got the impression you were an experienced killer.”

“I was just curious, is all.” Bullshit on your part, you just wanted to catch her in a lie. That last line tickled your ego, though. “A killer, huh?”

“Why else would Twilight hire you to be her bodyguard?”

You couldn’t help laughing. Ember simply stared at you as you chuckled to yourself. “I don’t think I’m as tough as you’re imagining, princess. Size can be pretty deceiving.”

Ember nodded. Nodded and smiled. “I’ll say. Twilight’s only a small pony, but she’s very tough. She constantly impresses me…” A sigh. “I should’ve been more polite with her, shouldn’t I?”

Now, that was the truth, but it was hardly why Twilight left, either. You couldn’t exactly tell her that, but you didn’t want her beating herself up, either. There was something likeable between this dragon’s exterior. Something softer. “I think Twilight likes you, Ember. Values you as a friend. I’ve known her for a while, and I don’t think she’s the type of pony to make excuses just to get out of spending time with someone. Besides, she seemed like she was enjoying her time with you.”

Ember blinked, lips parted. “You… you really think she was?”

“I’m sure she was.” You nodded. “Twilight’s never been good at faking a smile, I’d know it if she tried.”

“Is it bad that I can’t tell the difference?” came the socially awkward squeak of the little princess. “N-not that I care either way.”

Of course you don’t. “I take it dragons do things a little bit differently than ponies?” A nod. “Don’t worry, it took me a while to get used to how things are around here too. I’ve only lived in Equestria for a couple of months, after all. It’s nothing like home.”

Ember leaned into you as you spoke, watched the motion of your lips. “How about getting used to a creature like me? I know I’m pretty different to the average pony.”

“I think I could get used to you, definitely.”

A grin. “I’m glad to hear that.” She bit her lip. “I-I mean, just because it’ll help me with getting closer to Twilight, and—”

You cut her off. Probably not the best idea, but screw it, this is what Twilight gets for leaving you to your own devices. “Why do you do that?”

Ember knitted her eyebrows. “Do what?”

“That.” You pointed at her. “You act as if you don’t care about anything or anyone, but you clearly do. You don’t have to pretend that you’re not interested in other people, or ponies… it’s just silly, really.”

You witnessed an oddly effeminate snarl. “What did you just call me?”

Was your suit flame retardant? You’d find out soon. “I didn’t call you silly, I said you were acting it. But if you must know, yeah, I didn’t exactly get the best impression of you when you walked in being all rude to me.”

She lost the aggression in her tone. She looked sheepish, wide-eyed and stuck on what to say next. “It’s… difficult for me to act like ponies do. They’re all holding hooves and being happy and nice to each other, and dragons? Well, we argue. We fight. We give orders, and punish those that choose not to listen. It’s a different world.”

She really was a strange one. “And you don’t like that world?”

“Of course I like that world! It’s the one that I’m lord and princess of, and the responsibility to take care of it falls on me! I haven’t got time to be playing nice with everyone!”

“And yet you want to act more like Twilight, clearly. That’s why you’re sad that you might have scared her away. You don’t have to pretend with me, Ember. Or anyone, really. You can just be yourself.”

She spent a few moments in silence. Maybe she was contemplating what you said. Maybe she was fighting back the urge to smack you. When she eventually spoke, it was in a hesitant whisper. “You’re sure I wouldn’t look weak if I said what I was really thinking all the time? Even when I’m happy or excited, not just angry or annoyed?”

Whelp, time to channel all of your sagacious energy. “There’s a time and a place to be tough.” You placed a hand on her shoulder. It was forward, but she looked like she needed it. “Around your friends isn’t one of them, I promise. You can relax around us, and we’ll take care of you.”

Jeez, maybe Twilight was rubbing off on you after all. Ember recoiled from the touch as if it burnt, skittish and tensed in a moment, looking ready to fight. She soon slowed down when she realised that it was simply a soft, comforting gesture. She seemed to even relax into it a little. “You aren’t my friend, though. You’re just Twilight’s friend, and you thought I was mean to you. Why are you being nice to me?”

It really confused her, didn’t it? “Hey, just because we aren’t friends now doesn’t mean we never could be. Sure, you’re a bit of a bitch, but I don’t think that’s anywhere near the real you. Just gotta keep digging to get the real Ember to come out, yeah?”

Okay, you still weren’t a friendship princess just yet, but the sentiment was there.

“Funny how you grow a backbone the moment that Twilight leaves,” Ember commented, though she still made no move to break the contact between you. “You’re right, I’m not the nicest, and I’m not going to pretend I am either. I’m not even offended, really.”

She then chose to punch you on the arm. It hurt. “Is this what ‘not offended’ feels like?”

A wry smirk. “Didn’t mean I was just gonna let you call me a bitch, did it?” She prodded a finger into your chest. “You just going to stand there and take that?”

You rubbed your sore arm, but the pain barely registered beyond the playful glint in Ember’s eyes. “Eh?”

“I hit you,” she said matter-of-factly. “It felt pretty good, to be honest.” She twisted her body, reangling herself and cracking her back as she did so. A few soft clicks sounded—she ran her tongue across her teeth. “Hit me back. Let’s see what you’re made of.”

“You’re mad.” Okay, probably shouldn’t have let that one slip, but fuck, you didn’t know what else to say. “I’m not going to hit you! You’re… you’re—”

“I’m what?” She gave you an overly confident smirk, and then a wink. You’d obviously pressed some kind of button, and this was quickly leading to kinky, perhaps abusive territory. You were understandably perturbed. “You think you’re too strong for little me? That you’ll hurt me? Have you forgotten that I am a dragon?” She made a short hissing sound, a small measure of her scorn for the notion. “Strike me, human. Show me what your species can do.”

“Y-you’re sure?” You glanced down at your hands, half-balled into fists. Could you really refuse her? She might have been smaller than you, and sure, you were worried about hurting her, but if you said no, things might turn out even worse. If anything, Ember seemed to be buzzing with anticipation, stretching and moving and repositioning herself as she prepared for the incoming blow. “What if I hurt you?”

“Then I’ll be awfully impressed,” Ember snickered. She rolled her neck between her shoulders, squaring up, her chest only a couple of inches off of yours. You could feel the heat radiating off of her. It was like standing next to a hearth on a cold winter’s night, what with the chill that ran through you as you considered what might happen next. “But honestly, I don’t think that’s going to be an issue.”

Know what? Fuck it. Let’s do this. Pulling back, channeling a measure of your strength, you struck out, catching Ember in the hard scales of her upper arm. She laughed at you. Your arm went limp, and you resisted the urge to check your knuckles for cuts. “Satisfied?”

“Pahahaha, what was that?!” She looked at her arm, looked at it twice, searching for anything to give away that you’d even struck her. “You’re twice my size! I expected to at least feel you, but that’s it?!” She gave you a poke on the nose, instantly making you feel exactly half her size. “Honestly, I can’t put into words how disappointed I am. That was like being swatted by a—”

You struck her again, harder. You’d had enough. Who was she to sit there and make fun of you like that?! Enough, enough, enough, she could fucking chew on that and screw herself while she was at it.

A slight wince, but she retained her smile. “Okay… maybe you’re not completely infantile, but come on! I expected you to at least make me cry out, not just stand there all limp-wristed in your stupid piano suit and embarrass yourself!” She dropped her arms, untensed them. Blew you a kiss. She was the most condescending, rude thing you’d met in Equestria, you were certain of it. “One more shot. I won’t even look. Have fun trying.”

True to her word, she closed her eyes, and you had an idea. It was a dirty tactic, and you never would’ve usually done it—hell, you never would’ve looked for any way to hurt a female—but these were desperate circumstances, as there was no way she was living it down if you failed again. You moved around to the side of her in order to get a better angle, then swang a heavy hook right for the inside of her bicep, the softest part of her arm you could find.

Even then, the scales were fucking hard, but there was some actual give! Not only that, you heard a short, feminine ‘ahh!’ from Ember as your punch struck true, and before you knew it, she was hopping back in place, pushing her tail into the floor in order to regain her balance. She shot you the dirtiest look you could imagine. “I-it’s not like that even hurt! You’re lucky I don’t knock you over for that!”

Your grin almost split your face. “Really? It didn’t bother you? Suppose you won’t mind if I try again, then?”

Suddenly, Ember’s eyes were wide. “N-no! This is a stupid game, and we could be doing much better things. Why did you even suggest we do this?!”

“Erm, actually, you were the one who—”

“Whatever!” She was rubbing at her arm, attempting to soothe the pain, and the moment you caught her, she flicked her hand away and tried to style it out. “You think you’re so dominant because you landed a lucky hit on me? I could conquer you in a second! Silly human.”

“Sure you could.” You’d had enough of humouring her at this point. She was so fucking boisterous every time you gave her the chance, and it was beginning to turn from cute to irritating. Time to nip it in the bud. “If you’re so sure, do it.” You planted your feet firmly, getting ready to deflect her. “Come on, put your money where your mouth is. Prove you’re not just hot air.”

Hot air was exactly what came next, or rather, Ember breathing fire right over your head, because apparently you’d forgotten she was someone who could do that. You ducked instinctively, crashing into a nearby table as you hit the floor, attempting to save your precious face from being cooked. Your side ached from the collision, but when you looked up, you didn’t find Ember lording it over you, much to your shock.

In fact, she appeared more worried than anything. “Oh jeez, I just did that, didn’t I?”

“Nearly set me on fire, you mean?” You blinked. “If so… yeah, you just did that.”

Instantly, she sank to the floor with you, sitting right over you. “I… I’m so sorry. Honestly, I got so caught up playing that I forgot you weren’t another dragon, and…” she moved to cover her mouth, but shook off the impulse. “I’m teasing you a lot, but honestly, I can’t talk to ponies like I talk to you. This… this is how dragons treat each other, and you play along, and, and…”

“And you just nearly burnt me to a crisp?” you offered, feeling something between affection and angst emanating from your companion.

“...yeah. That.” What she did next shocked you, but you couldn’t stop it if you wanted to. Partially because dragons have partially strong grips, mainly because you didn’t want to. She wrapped herself around you, tail coiling around your leg, her chest on yours, arms pushed between your sides and claws lightly trailing your back. She pulled you close to her, looking into your eyes, reflecting back a fiery pool alight with emotion. “D-dragons don’t hug. It’s not a thing we do, and… I don’t know if I’m doing this right, but I was so scared that I was about to hurt you, and… I hope this helps.”

She wasn’t lying. Beneath the feeling of her soft, firm breasts against your chest, you could feel her heart hammering with anxiety. This wasn’t an outcome she wanted whatsoever. “I’m glad you’re being honest. And… no, I can’t pretend I’m exactly thrilled that you almost turned me into a human raisin, but I appreciate the sentiment.” You hugged back, squeezing her as much as you could manage. It was difficult to tell if she could really feel the impact through her tough scales, but she looked content. Her eyes lidded, her breath shortened, to the point that you could make out each individual exhale, feel the warmth of it against your cheek. “Apology accepted, princess.”

Ember’s voice was weak. “There’s a lot more I should apologise for, but…” She gave herself a little nod. “I know you’re not a dragon, but I kinda wish you were. Don’t get me wrong, I l-like you as you are, but I feel like I have to be super careful with you, and—” She chuckled to herself. You shared a laugh. “I’m just being silly.” Her voice cracked. “If… if you tell anyone you saw me like this, or that I hugged you, I’ll… I’ll—”

“Beat me up,” you smirked despite yourself. Maybe you wouldn’t get tired of it after all. “Got it.”

Ember looked like a chastised puppy. She forced the petulance from her face before it could develop. Hazarded a smile. Allowed herself vulnerability. “N-no. I’ll… I’ll do this.” And then she did that. What was that? She kissed you.

Well, it wasn’t really a kiss. It was just about the most demure thing you’d ever felt, including Fluttershy’s voice on your ears. A solitary, lingering peck that channeled only a modicum of the softness in Ember’s soul, an outreach to you. It was an affirmation of her interest, her desire to have something with you, to apologise, to progress in your friendship to somewhere yet untrodden, it was…

You had no clue what the fuck it was. It felt really nice, though, when you weren’t busy trying to psychoanalyse her or rationalise it. You kissed back, but only briefly, only long enough to feel the warmth of her lips, the softness of her, the fleeting touch of lightness juxtaposed to such a tough exterior. It didn’t feel like she’d cracked, though, like there was a glint in her armour.

Rather… it felt as if she’d finally opened up.

Okay, A Tsundere Fuck is Good Enough

Bereft of defenses, she moved back, surveyed your expression, as if she was looking at you for the very first time. “I’ve… never done that before. Don’t tell anyone.”

You were equally lost for words. “I’ve never done that before with a dragon?” It was all you could offer that was coherent, but it got a giggle out of her.

“I’d hope not. Otherwise I’d need to have words with Spike.” She relaxed into the embrace, squirming her way down to your chest and looking up at you. You almost let out a shiver at the feeling of her light, wondrous body snaking down you. “But seriously, that was nice. I’ve been thinking about doing that since I met you. I don’t meet many creatures like you. And I don’t meet many that are anywhere near my size, especially with dragons, heheh.”

“Christ, how do you think I’ve felt?!” Finally, you had a sounding board for this complaint, and everything else left your head, from niggling doubts to rapidly heightening arousal, if only for a moment. “I come to Equestria, and everyone is on four fucking legs, and that’s just not my thing! And then I saw you, I saw you and…” You felt your lips going dry, but you carried on talking regardless. You were in a hole now. “You’re like, almost exactly how I like girls from my world to be.”

Ember blinked, sitting up at once, smile about her. “Really? How so?”

“Well, your body’s really similar, all the way down to your…” you made a motion towards her chest, not wanting to say it out loud.

Ember grasped at her breasts between the thin fabric of her leotard. “These? You know, I’ve never really considered how few creatures have these on their chests…” You still weren’t entirely sure she should have tits, but you were a little distracted to complain. “You… you wanna look at them?”

Your throat caught, but apparently the question was rhetorical. Before you could say anything, Ember had pulled the top of the fabric over her head, stripping down and exposing her pert, heavy breasts.

You’d honestly forgotten where you were at this point. What did it matter? All that did at this point, all your mind could possibly conceive was the image of this beautiful little dragon woman grabbing at her tits and pushing them up for your inspection, letting them go and watching their heft and bounce as they fell back into place, no sag whatsoever despite what was easily a D-cup in size. The muscle of her stomach and underbelly was lean and impressive, her figure svelte and powerful all the same, with little fat to speak of. She sat there, on her knees, leaned over you, curiosity etched on her face.

“So… do I still look so similar without the clothes?”

She looked nervous. You were speechless. Part of you had wondered if it was simply how sex starved you’d been, how long it had been since you’d seen anything resembling a conventional human form, if that was all that had driven your interest, but one more look at her beautious form confirmed the truth. “You look absolutely incredible. You’re amazing, Ember.”

“Y-your turn.” She pointed at your suit as she pulled the rest of the leotard off, exposing thick, muscled thighs, a small, dainty purple slit and from that angle, just the side-glance of a perfectly well-toned behind. You might have died at that moment and you probably wouldn’t have noticed. There was blood rushing to your head, the obligations of your job an afterthought, and all you could do in response to her clumsily ordered command was oblige.

You stood, wanting to make as much of a show of it as you could, but truthfully, you’d never stripped for anyone. That said, with all the ridicule that’d come from this damned suit through the last hour or two, you were incredibly happy to get it off.

When you finally undid your shirt, button by button, you noticed just how much you’d managed to catch Ember’s interest. She was eyeing you like a piece of particularly succulent steak as you exposed more and more of your lightly furred chest (real men don’t wax kappa), down to your toned abdomen and the faint V outline you’d SOMEHOW managed to maintain between your abs and obliques. It wasn’t super defined. You weren’t a supermodel by any means, but you considered yourself to be fit, and Ember seemed more than satisfied with what she saw, if the way that her hands travelled was any indication.

It almost seemed to be subconscious on her part. You didn’t want to point out that she was doing it, lightly pinching at her nipples, licking around her fingers and applying the soft moisture to her aroused nubs, a light pant about her. It was when she finally pushed a hand past her lower belly, softly touching against her lips that you’d finally managed to unbuckle your belt, pulling your jeans off and leaving it so all that separated the pair of you was the thin fabric of your underwear and a couple feet of space.

But you could feel her encroaching, shuffling forward on her knees even as she continued to play with her little slit, and all pretense of what you were going to do, of whether this was simply an exchange of culture and a way to better understand each other? That was out of the window. The two of you were clearly turned on and ready to fuck, albeit nervous.

You weren’t ashamed to admit that, either. You were allowed to be nervous, right? It wasn’t every day you got a chance to fuck a dragon princess. What if she was burning hot on the inside, or she breathed fire when she came and incinerated you?

All concerns went out of the window the moment her clawed fingers touched against your stomach. She slowly pulled her way down, allowing them to get caught on your underwear, tugging just a little bit before tearing her hands away. Whether or not she was intentionally teasing was lost on you at first, but the moment she pressed her cheek against your hardening cock through the underwear and gave it a soft nuzzle, you knew for sure that she was in the mood to play games.

How had it even come to this? One moment, the two of you were at each other’s throats! Now, you were at each other’s… yeah, that.

You had so much to thank Twilight for (and likely apologise for) when all of this was over.

She continued to tease your cock between the fabric, eventually slipping a hand in and beginning to work your shaft on the inside. She was exceptionally soft, the way she coaxed you to full hardness, which you were thankful for as you were cut and you’d been more than a little worried she wouldn’t realise how to handle your sensitive head.

Apparently, Ember was a fast learner, and very intuitive.

She could only stall on the both of you for so long though, and eventually pulled your cock free of its cotton prison, allowing the underwear to slide down your thighs and drop to your feet, where you quickly stepped out of it. There was a gasp then, and what almost sounded like a squeal of satisfaction. You’d never of thought Ember capable of making that noise.

“This looks the perfect size,” she asserted, holding your shaft in both hands, moving it from side to side, giving you a small sniff. “You have a pleasant musk, too. One I’d associate with a dangerous predator, but yet wouldn’t consider fearsome? How curious…” She hazarded a lick at the tip of your cock, a bead of your precum on her tongue, and much like earlier, like she’d been when she ate her gems, you saw her eyes light up. “Do you mind if I sample just a little more?”

Like you were going to protest. Her tongue was like liquid velvet, soft and flexible yet strong and versatile, flicking over each surface of your sensitive head in quick successive motions, ones you could hardly keep up with even when you tried closing your eyes and feeling it out, myriad sensations that built up with each repetitive flick of her tongue and threatened to crash against your body so hard they’d knock you out cold.

Somehow, you kept standing, panting and gasping at each new ministration as Ember began to grow acquainted with the slab of cock on full offer for her. She was ravenous, almost greedy, and she’d definitely decided that it was all for her. That said, she took her time, introducing herself to more and more of it with each stroke of her tongue, each modicum of pressure from her full, warm lips. Eventually, she could take it no more, or perhaps you couldn’t, and she finally pushed down, taking the tip of your cock into her mouth.

You weren’t sure whether it was you that pushed her down, what with your hands suddenly finding themselves on her head, or whether she’d taken the plunge of her own volition, but what you did know was that the pleasant vibration from her moan on contact coarsed through you all the way to your belly, down to your toes, which you had to stop from curling on instinct. She had a hand on your base, slowly pumping you as she worked more and more of your length into her mouth, not stopping for breath, not considering her limits, simply pushing herself further with each stroke, each thrust… that’s right, you were finally beginning to give in to your animalistic side.

She liked them rough, after all, right?

So you started giving it to her harder. Pleasure had eclipsed morality, forethought, reason, and right now, Ember’s throat felt like a territory you needed to conquer. You staked your claim with a heavy thrust, one that made her tits bounce in reaction, her legs quiver and shake, her tail smack against the marble floor. She was playing with her clit faster, moaning onto your cock unabashed as she continued to suck you, gaining her confidence, pushing back, attempting to retain control of the situation and be sure that she was the one who controlled what you felt, and how much of it.

But you didn’t want to play games, you wanted to fuck that little throat while it tightened around your cock until she was cajoling the cum from your tip, whetting her appetite, sating your desire, and emptying your load all at once.

And of course, you just knew that a greedy dragon would want to swallow every last drop, right?

She seemingly had no limit to her endurance. Even when you were beginning to feel tired, when you could barely handle the tingle of her tongue, her throat against your length, she continued to work you in earnest, occupation with her task and fervent desire to see it through transcending any attempt at slowing down you might have made. There were no breaks. There was no stopping. No recuperation or waiting or recovering, just fuck, fuck, fucking until the two of you were completely and utterly spent.

And you were going to bust in her mouth at this rate. You knew it already. You could feel the tension rising in you, threatening to take over, but you beat it back if only to allow this brilliance to last longer. You knew you had to fight it, that you couldn’t let your first time with her be over this quickly, that she’d only think you weak for it, but there was no fighting the impossibly skilled maneuvering of her tongue, the shake of her body, the fantasy you’d been fostering for hours in your mind, months in a broader scope, finally playing out in front of you in all of its beauty.

Maybe it was the grace of god that pulled her off of you. Maybe she finally pushed herself a little too far, as she was panting and gasping when she finally allowed you your cock back. Not a moment too soon, as you knew you’d been only a matter of seconds away from finishing in her mouth. There was no talking, no. You both knew that anything said could ruin this moment, that what came next had to happen now or it might not happen at all.

And so she pushed you down onto the floor. It answered the question of whether she was capable once and for all. Your cock stood towards the ceiling, a beacon of your monumental excitement, and in seconds, Ember was upon it, rubbing her slick cunt against your length, up and down, up and down… With little twists of her hips, she ensured that she was leaving her juices all over you, no spot left untouched, and when you were finally nice and lubricated, she pulled herself up, allowing your cock to stand true for just long enough for her to plant herself back down, spearing herself on just half of your length.

But holy fuck, did you feel like a virgin again. There was a feeling that you remembered experiencing when you first lost it, way back when. One of shock and awe. The wetness, the tightness, the little explosions in your mind like visceral fireworks when you finally felt the dam bursting sensation of being inside of a woman for the first time. It was that, all fucking over again. If you hadn’t already realised, this would’ve been the moment that you discovered just how wonderfully different Ember was to any woman you’d ever met on earth.

They just couldn’t do it how a dragon did. She was so perfectly tight, clinging to your cock so snugly that you imagined there’d be friction if it wasn’t for how exceptionally wet she was… she’d been right from the start, you were an absolutely perfect fit for her.

And yet, she was taking some time to adjust. Her pants were soft, husky, they held all of her bravado, but the moment she pushed herself any further down, she let out an effeminate squeak that only reminded you of her inexperience. This wasn’t like her mouth, you didn’t want to hurt her, no matter the temptation to simply fuck the hell out of her, to pin her down, hold her by the hips and give her every inch.

You had to let her ease into it, no matter how torturously slow it was, how much it made you yearn to thrust up and into her. You knew it was the only way she’d enjoy it anywhere near as much as you were.

And so you let her continue to push down, lightly twisting and adjusting her body as she went, hands on your stomach, using you for support, her face twisted, expressing some mixture of pain, pleasure, and a love of the two being combined. When she eventually bottomed out, taking as much of you as she could possibly fit—about three quarters—she began to slide back up, becoming used to being stretched in such a way, to having something like this inside of her in the first place, to enjoying it, using it to get herself off, coming together with another in a way she’d never experienced before now.

“H-how you finding it?” a pant between your words. Fuck she was tight.

She was still blushing. Hell, her face might have burnt hotter than her flames. “This… this is—ahh!—this is fucking great…”

You might have laughed in any other situation, maybe teased her for being so delicate, but you were hardly in the state to yourself. She was hardly wrong, either. This felt more than just great, it was nigh indescribable, the kind of perfection that you’d only usually experience right on the cusp of orgasm, but even now, only halfway there, you were feeling that same level of earth-shattering pleasure the entire damn time.

And it was about to get a whole lot worse.

Ember was really beginning to come into her own now, beginning to allow herself to bounce with more rhythm, more adventurous motions, pulling herself all the way up to your tip before beginning to slam herself back down. It wasn’t long until she was frantic, panting and bouncing and riding you with force, the true dragon warrior in her surfacing every time your cock submerged deep into her luxurious tunnel, her walls hugging you, the weight of her frim ass bouncing against your lap…

She’d clench around you, too. Pull noises from you that you didn’t realise you were capable of making, turn your masculine grunts to whimpers and moans… she could really take control of you, even being a virgin, even being inexperienced, this was a sport to her, a competition, an exercise, and it was the kind of environment her species thrived in.

But you weren’t going to let her push you to breaking point. Not just yet.

You sat up, wrapping your arms around her back and allowing her to lean back, thrusting in as deep as you could manage from the angle, the laboured breathing of the two of you in perfect synchronicity. There was a pause, a skip of a heartbeat as you felt your prick’s sensation crest the apex for but a moment, feeling as if you might have pierced the barrier, that you might be ready to burst once more, but you managed to hold on by the edge of your clenched fingertips, denying yourself if only to stay in the fight, instead digging them into her back and scratching straight down her.

She gasped from the sudden action, but luckily didn’t return the gesture with too much ferocity. Her claws could’ve really done a number on you if she hadn’t been careful. Ember understood balance here. In her actions, in her personality, she didn’t know how to be measured, that much had been clear, but in this single, solitary act? Here she was able to exercise caution and control, share with another, lead by example. It was almost as if it was intrinsic to her.

But you were about to show her another side of sex. You hugged her tight to you, feeling her hard nipples slip against your chest for just a moment, the soft motion sending trembles shooting down your spine. Before she was able to reassert her dominance, control the situation once more, you exercised the size advantage you had over her, picking her up and moving to stand.

Once you had her in the centre of the room, her legs wrapped around your waist, you were finally at the perfect angle to truly fuck her deep. Her breaths became hollow, juxtaposed to the incredible fullness she must’ve been experiencing in that moment, and while she tried to push back, wrapped her legs tighter and attempted to bounce on you from her position, you had total control here. You squeezed her tighter, only causing her to do the same with her body, contract and pulse until the tip of your cock began to feel spasmic, every twitch and convulsion another static shock that ran up and down you, every moan in your shared chorus an ode to the steadily building staccato of scintillating sound.

And then you spied the table. You laid her down on it, fucking her without relent, without consideration as to her tolerance, somehow knowing she’d be able to take it all and dish it back out in kind. She’d take it, love it, and scream your fucking name.

You could really pound her fast now, control exactly which angle you went in at, how far you went, and what’s more, you had access to her entire body. The table shook as you increased your pace, one hand moving to her lower belly, eventually snaking down to her clit, allowing you to stimulate her tight little pussy as you continued to push your way inside her. Only halfway, though, as you were feverishly hunting for her g-spot at the same time. You really wanted to get her off, almost as much as you wanted to shoot your load inside her!

“Th-this is the best I’ve ever felt…” Ember was bright red at the cheeks, like she’d covered herself in ruby dust, claws gripping the table and scratching into it, tail wrapped around your leg and squeezing like you imagined an affectionate boa constrictor might, but it didn’t deter you. Even when you could feel part of your circulation going, you weren’t sure if it was from the pressure or your breathlessness, but you continued regardless. “Please… please don’t stop…”

Suddenly, a devilish thought crossed your mind. “And what if I do?” You began to slow down as soon as you said it. Your body rebelled, it wanted you to keep fucking her, damnit, but you couldn’t help but exercise a little bit of your mean streak after how she’d acted earlier. “Are you going to beg me to keep going, princess? Are you going to beg me to fuck you?”

She only squeezed your leg tighter. Now it actually hurt. You forgot that was there in the first place, fuck. Of course, you pretended it didn’t bother you whatsoever. “Don’t do this! You know I need this right now! D-don’t make me—ahh—”

Of course, you pushed only slightly back inside her whilst she was talking. You knew she needed that final push over the edge in order to oblige. “You were saying?..”

“I-I’m begging,” there was no fight in her voice anymore, just a needy, whining desire, like a puppy that had been deprived of its play. “Please, Anon, please keep going, don’t stop, fill me up… I need it so fucking bad...”

That was all the encouragement you’d needed to hear and more. In fact, you felt as if she deserved a reward for being so forthcoming, for letting her defenses down so much, even if you’d pushed her into it.

You were going to make her cum. You were going to make her cum fucking hard, right now.

You worked yourself into a loose combination of ministrations, three quick pumps and then one slow, long one, switching it up every now and then to shock and tease her, picking up the pace of your index and middle finger working circles around her clit the whole while. Your other hand brushed across her body, breezing past her nipples and then finally finding purchase around her throat. You saw the fear in her eyes, but you only squeezed lightly, and she trusted you to keep going. If she’d panicked, you would’ve let go, but it would’ve been fucking hard.

You applied more and more pressure as you went, increasing your speed, your feet grounded, her tail having let go of your leg, now limply tapping against the table as she gripped it even tighter with her claws, tongue lolling from her mouth, tears in the corners of her eyes… You knew she only needed a little more pressure to be pushed over the edge.

You grabbed her by the hips, pulling her close and meeting her insides with all of the force you could muster, keeping her close, not letting her squirm away, and then finally, when her breath was so quickened it sounded as if she was hyperventilating, when she was so frantically lost in pleasure that she looked as if she could’ve been flying in ecstacy, you finally returned pressure to her engorged, wanting clit. One final flick, and a full, slow thrust inside, and you finally felt the pressure inside of her begin to release, a trickle seeping past your buried cock and pooling on the edge of the table.

Not only did you feel it through your cock, the rapid tightening and contracting, the base, animalistic pleasure you were all but lost in, you heard it in her screams, rapid and coarse, refusing to die down, paying no heed to her surroundings, not caring who might’ve heard her, what might have happened next, for she was truly lost in this moment, ferried away with you to a place where all that mattered was the all-encompassing delight that shot through her like a current on an electrical storm.

You wanted to keep fucking her to your own orgasm, you desperately wanted to, but you knew that she’d need a moment to recuperate. No matter how tough Ember might’ve been, she deserved at least a moment of rest after that.

Only, she got straight back up the moment you pulled out. As it turned out, dragons were full of surprises. She sat on the edge of the table, still panting, and began to wank and suck your cock with a passionate urgency. There was no delay, no grace to it, only a wanton desire to make you cum too, to return the favour you’d so generously given, to make you burst all over her face and chest, let it drip down her body and glaze her entirely…

She was so sloppy and intense… this wasn’t tantric sensuality, this was purely raw expression, and when she began to incorporate her tits too, placing your cock between the soft flesh and lightly shifting them up and down as she continued to lick at the tip, suckling on the end whenever she could reach it, you finally reached the point of no return.

To say that you felt your soul leave you through your cock and subsequently had an out of body experience would be a slight understatement. Your first spurt hit Ember directly on the chest, cum glistening against her breasts, whilst your second caught her face and lips. It was an eruption that made inconsequentiality out of anything that’d preceded it, an implosion that could’ve given life to the dead, a majestic feeling that surpassed anything you might’ve experienced in anticipation of that moment, one that set in your mind the pinnacle of all things hedonistic and fantastic.

In short, it was a fucking good orgasm.

Riding down off of that high was meant to be a fun moment, right? Like, the best afterglow ever, surely. You’d just fucked a dragon princess, for fuck’s sake. Those first twenty seconds afterwards were a time for quiet reflection, to remember everyone who’d ever told you you’d never get laid in school, look back at them and stick a mental middle finger up. It was a time for both victory and letting the feeling ebb and fade, catching your breath, perhaps having a masculine cuddle with your new friend.

Instead, you got hit by a tail again. “You got it all over my face! Idiot!”

Oh, yeah. For a second, you’d forgotten who you were dealing with. “You were literally jerking my cock over your face, what did you expect?!”

All of a sudden, Ember was incredibly flustered. Again. “I-I dunno, for you to aim it better?!”

“Well I think I aimed it pretty damn well!” You smirked. Couldn’t help it. “Looks good on you.”

“H-heh…” She returned the smile, wiping away a small measure of your load and giving it a taste. “Shut up.”

“No, you.” A short laugh shared between the two of you, and you surveyed the room around you. Mainly untouched, apart from the deep claw marks in the table and the remaining bowls, plates, cutlery and stuff that’d clattered to the floor. “What are we going to tell Twilight when she gets back?”

Ember didn’t miss a beat. “That we’re getting married, obviously.”

You blinked. Blinked a few times, in fact. You were pretty sure one of your eyes was still twitching once you’d stopped blinking. Suddenly, you remembered just who you’d decided to have messy table sex with. “You… Are you serious?”

Ember held a deadpan expression. “Why wouldn’t I be?” Right as you considered finding a window to jump out of, she broke into a laugh. “No, I’m not serious, that would be ridiculous.”

“O-oh…” Jesus, dodged a bullet there. Sex equalling marriage was like, not your jam. “Thank fuck for that, then.”

“We are dating now though. For at least a month. Dragon customs.”

“Very funny.”

“I’m not joking this time.” Ember poked your chest, ensuring she had your attention. “But… it’s only because that’s dragon law. It’s not…”

“Because you like me or anything, right?” You wished she knew how much of a cliche she was.

“Exactly!” She nodded very quickly at that. “I’m glad we’re on the same page. Anyways… what next?”

You tapped a finger to your chin. “You wanna finally go on this castle tour?”

“By that, do you mean ‘do I want to fuck you in every room in this castle?’”

“I mean, I didn’t originally… Now I do.”

“Lead the way!” Ember got up and stretched, finished cleaning herself off. “Leave the piano suit here though. I don’t wanna have to wait to get you naked again.”

Christ, there was gonna be a lot of explaining to Twilight when she got home. Let’s just hope you didn’t make too much of a mess of the rest of Twilight’s castle before she got back.

...ah, fuck it, you’d earnt this.

Author's Note

Hey! You made it to the end. I sincerely hope you enjoyed what you read!

I'll be honest with you: I don't think this is my best work. I'm just now trying to get back into writing consistently, and I've got some rust to shake off! I hope that despite it not being up to my usual standard, it's still good enough.

That all said, I think the story improved as it went along, and I'm interested in writing a sequel! Make sure you're following my account so you're notified when the sequel does drop! And of course, if you appreciated the story, click the like button? It helps a lot.

Also, I write commissions! If you're interested in having your own story written, please feel free to message me, and we can discuss it!