Angel Dust

by CyanFoxtrot

Rating: teen
Tags: Opalescence, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Angel, Gummy, Winona, Random, Owlowiscious
Length: 3339

The pets converge for mild gambling and fun

(Oneshot) While the mane six go out on a picnic, Angel has the pleasure of entertaining the pets and maintaining his business as Ponyville's deal... er... helper (Mild references to drugs and other naughty things... all in the name of fun)

Published 2012-08-11 19:24:05 UTC
Last updated 2012-08-11 19:24:05 UTC

Angel Dust

Angel Dust

The sunlight broke through the cottage windows and penetrated through the rabbit’s bed covers. It groaned and it refused to awaken. Its small agitation was increased as it felt a gentle nudge against its back.

“Now come on Angel, its time for breakfast” the yellow Pegasus smiled as the bunny reluctantly sat up, a large frown sat on his face like it had every morning he spent in Fluttershy’s care “Good morning”

“For you maybe” Angel groaned as he rubbed his eyes, Fluttershy smiled sweetly, she understood when animals had a problem but Angel knew she didn't actually speak rabbit. this allowed him to be a bit more vocal than she realized

“Now I made you lettuce and carrots” Fluttershy placed a small bowl heaped with vegetables next to the grumpy bunny’s oversized bed “Eat up”

The white rabbit sniffed the food before flipping it away and dropping back to his pillow “I have that stuff every single morning. Can’t you wake me up with cake for a change?”

Fluttershy picked up the food from the floor and pushed the bowl again “Please Angel? It’s good for you and will make you big and strong”

“Do you even understand me half the time?” Angel crawled out of bed and hopped into the kitchen. Climbing onto the kitchen counter the bunny opened the cookbook that rested on the side "I have to make a song and dance about everything with you"

Fluttershy looked at the page shoved in her face “A-an ice-cream Sunday? Oh b-but that would take me a while to get the ingredients, I don’t want you to starve”

“Are you serious?” dropping the book Angel dropped to the floor and returned to the bowl besides his bed “All I want is a bit of variety but I end up with Miss no adventure”

Fluttershy smiled happily as she saw the rabbit begin to eat the carrots “See that wasn’t so hard was it?” she nuzzled the top of the rabbit’s head only to be pushed away

“Yeah yeah” Angel groaned before forcing himself to eat the food before him "That reminds me i have to see if the chickens are still working on that production line"

A knock at the door made Fluttershy jump while Angel just turned his head “Oh that startled me” Fluttershy shook as she walked to the door and gently opened it

“Howdy Fluttershy” An orange earth pony stood at the door, tipping the hat which sat on a blond mane. She was surrounded by the group that usually accompanied her

“Oh hello Applejack, hi girls” Fluttershy’s nervous shaking stopped at the sight of her friends “What are you all doing here?”

“The picnic remember?” a cyan Pegasus with a rainbow mane hovered slightly above the group

Fluttershy gasped as she remembered “Oh the picnic I completely forgot!” her shocked voice held as much volume as a kitten “I’m so sorry girls”

“Its quite alright darling” the alabaster unicorn smiled “In fact we were wondering if we could ask a favour of you”

“Oh um… ok, anything to help” Fluttershy nodded slowly out of nervousness “What is it?” she braced for something terrible

“Can we leave our pets here? They need to spend time together alone as well as we do” A purple horned mare smiled as a small group of animals seemingly appeared from nowhere. The animals consisted of a cat, a dog, an owl, a tortoise and a toothless alligator

“Oh well that’s ok with me” Fluttershy looked nervously at Angel before turning back “I think Angel needs some cheering up, he seems to be a bit upset”

“Does somepony need cheering up?” A pink head bounced up from the back of the group, her grin instantly caused Angel displeasure “I have always wanted to make a party for a sad bunny AH HA we can call it ‘happy bunny to you’ party!”

Angel finished with his food and took the bowl to the kitchen to avoid the bombardment of party ideas, inside the rabbit felt happy that his friends could hang out for a while. Also he had a business to run and some of his customers were at the door

“Ok I’ll just say goodbye” Fluttershy followed Angel into the kitchen “I’m going with my friends, is that alright with you?”

“Yes now move, your in my way you dumb mule” Angel frowned, stamping his foot on the wooden floorboards

“Will you be ok?“ Fluttershy looked over her shoulder “I don’t know when I will be back”

Angel began to push the Pegasus towards the door, she was too frightened to bother resisting “Just leave already!”

Fluttershy flew out the door and the girls began to make their way to the park, Angel stood at the door frowning at the five varied animals that looked back at him

“You got my stuff?” the white cat asked and smiled as Angel held up a bag of catnip “So what enjoyment have you got planned this time?”

Angel’s trademark frown was replaced with a sly grin “If Winona has brought the drink then you are in for a treat”

The brown and white dog hurried to a nearby bush and dragged out a small barrel, cider sloshed around inside “Would I ever let y’all down?”

“Alright everypony into the party house, oh and Winona” Angel allowed the other guests in but held the dog for a moment “I dropped a word in for ya with that dog across town”

“Thanks Angel” Winona licked the side of his face, instantly causing him to hold his gag reflex “If ya need anything let me know alrigh’?”

“What’s happening?” The slow tortoise asked as he just managed to make it past the doorstep

“Winona wants to be some guys bitch” Angel smirked, he held up a paw as the angered dog threatened to swipe him “It’s true!”

The dog thought for a moment before growling quietly and storming inside, barrel in tow. Angel was about to close the door before he remembered a green shell was still in the way

“I will be there in a minute” Tank smiled but slowly dropped his happy attitude “Or two”

Angel groaned and pulled the tortoise into the room so he could shut the door “Right now we are all in…” Angel hopped over to his bed and pulled out a deck of cards “Who is up for some blackjack?”

The group smiled as they flipped over Angel’s bed and made a decent sized table for their gambling session, the bottom was a smooth polished wood that easily seated them all with room to spare. The barrel of cider sat next to the owl that began to serve out drinks

“So we are finally playing a game that requires brain rather than brawn” The brown owl smiled as he talked in his educated accent and took a small sip from a miniature cup

Angel began to shuffle the cards “Owlowiscious it is only adding, it isn’t that hard”

The owl looked over at the toothless alligator that appeared to be looking at both of them at the same time “I suppose it isn’t impossible”

“Right we are playing for favours, same as usual” Angel began to slide the cards to each of his friends “So anypony got any stories?” Angel looked at his cards, the queen of hearts and the nine of spades smiled at him

“Apart from Rarity having another panic attack of a missed ruby no… that reminds me” Opalescence removed a red gem from her clean coat and slid it to Angel before returning to her cards

Angel chuckled as he weighed the gem “Very well done, I admit you are very sneak for somepony of your… status”

The cat grinned “Well just because a lady looks good doesn’t mean she plays that way… hit me”

“I didn’t know you were into that kinda stuff” Angel chuckled with the others as Opalescence frowned disapprovingly

“I meant the cards” The cat looked at her new card before dropping all of them “I’m bust”

“Well I saw a spectacle last night that was simply astounding” The owl sighed happily

“Hit me” Winona barked and brought the owl out of his trance “If ya gonna talk about another shooting star stop. I don’t need ta know when Princes Luna sneezes”

Angel slid a card to the dog and her tail began to wag heavily “I’m out” Owlowiscious dropped his cards, Tank and Angel followed suit

“How the hay did ya know I had twenty?” Winona’s jaw dropped as she showed an ace, a five and a four “My tail wagged again didn’t it?”

“I suggested having letting that tail of yours to grow so it didn’t seem as obvious when it wagged” Opalescence looked at the other players and saw Gummy was the only other one in “Oh is Gummy still going?”

“Oh the tension, will Gummy back out and Winona not receive any favours or has the toothless alligator got a chance?” Owlowiscious leaned forwards

“I know I can hardly stay still with the excitement,” Tank said with more enthusiasm than his shelled body showed

“I have…” Gummy’s eyes danced the opposite sides of his cards, the condition of his lack of teeth made it harder to talk so as a result he had quite a bad lisp “One thouthand and ten”

Tank slowly leaned over and looked at the cards “No… that’s two tens”

“Oh… hit me” Gummy’s head turned to Angel but his eyes looked at the tortoise and dog either side of the confused rabbit

Angle slid him a card “I still think you should get those eyes fixed. I know an eagle that can sort that right out”

Gummy picked up the card and looked at it with intense concentration before slamming down two ten and an ace “Thuck em bitth!”

Angel and Opalescence clapped and looked at the shocked Winona “So…” Angel rested his fluffy head on his paw “I wonder what the favour is gonna be”

Winona silently begged “Not another bath, please for the love of Celestia”

Gummy’s toothless grin unsettled everypony and Winona gulped loud enough for everypony else to laugh. The silence fell again as Gummy opened his mouth.

“Thrathh my back” Gummy turned his scaly tail and shuffled clumsily around the table

Winona looked to everypony for support but only received smug grins “Y-ya want me to… scratch your back?”

“Yeah, it itcheth between my thoulders” Gummy held his green back before the bewildered dog “Now”

Winola reluctantly began scratching the scales with her long claws and turned her head away as a layer began to peel away “Ya didn’t tell me ya started sheddin’ ya scales” she cried in disgust

“Ha ha nice one Gummy!” Angel laughed loudly as he held a paw up to high paw/claw the alligator

Gummy walked past and his swipe missed Angel’s paw “Thankth”

Winona wiped some of the scales from her paw as she turned back to the table “So another game or what?”

Opalescence opened her mouth to say something but was cut short as a loud rasping noise came from the front door, outside a few flickers of increased light made the next few words horrifying to the animal group

“Open up, it’s the guards doing random searches for narcotics!”

Angel quickly flipped the table back to a bed before pointing at Opalescence and quietly screaming, “Flush the stash!”

The cat quickly grabbed her catnip and darted to the bathroom, the others darted for various hiding spots. Owlowiscious pretended to be a lampshade, Winona dived under the sofa, Opalescence remained in the bathroom, Tank… started to run for the back door

Gummy ran into the kitchen, stuck an apple in his mouth and dove into the oven for thirty minutes on a high heat, turning occasionally to get a nice juicy texture evenly on each side, when crispy brown remove and serve on a hot plate… ok he ran into the kitchen and hid amongst the varied fruit in the pantry, pretending to be a pineapple

Angel waited until he was sure his friends, excluding Tank had hidden before opening the door, his nervous smile deflated into an annoyed expression as he called the all clear to his friends

“It’s alright” Angel called again, “It’s just Philomena”

The pets all slowly left their hiding places, they all groaned when they saw the laughing phoenix, they replaced the table and sat down again

“So will you be joining us during a break in you steady schedule?” Owlowiscious hooted clearly agitated he had flown for nothing

“No thank you, in fact I was just coming to puck up a delivery” The phoenix’s flames didn’t damage the small brown bag that Angel removed from a flower pot “Thank you Angel”

“Whatever you can do something for me, you know that bear that got caught? I need him out, he was my supply line into the forest” Angel held the bag just out of reach until Philomena nodded

“I’ll see what I can do” Philomena waved to the others before taking flight into the sky, brown bag in her beak

Angel sat down and gathered up all the lose cards, he stopped when he saw his friends staring at him, jaws agape “What?”

“Ya are dealing to the Princesses pet bird?” Winona’s chuckle managed to also carry a hint that she was impressed

Tank slowly returned to the table “What was in the bag anyway?”

“Yes I managed to get some ties with the royal featherhead so what?” Angel smirked again “Oh and it was just some strong firelighters”

Opalescence licked her paw as she sorted out her coat from the dashing about “I wonder what she does with them… I mean she is already ablaze”

“Apparently she finds them… stimulating” Angel winked and the group gasped, except Gummy that had somehow still was under the impression that he should still be a pineapple and had lettuce hanging out his snout pretending to be leaves

Owlowiscious helped Gummy realise that it was not a real guard before turning back to the matter at hand “How does she… you know?”

“Like soap I guess” Angel shrugged “I don’t know the details, I just help out where I can”

“That reminds me of a favour I need to ask of you, and it is a big one” Owlowiscious rubbed his feathered wings together nervously “can you reconsider having Spike… removed?”

Angel sighed loudly “I will say it again, no” the bunny dropped the cards on the table “I am not having Spike taken out so you get more attention”

The agitated bunny began to reach for where he left the cards only to find them gone, the group looked around only to find Gummy chewing on them

“Theve wafferth tathte funny” he spat them out in disgust and the papery mush splattered across the table “thorry”

“Well I was getting’ bored of cards anyhow” Winona finished her cider “So anypony got love troubles but me?”

Even Gummy groaned at the repetitive subject “Really Winona after one drink you always ask us this” Opalescence shuffled away from the mess the alligator made

“Well I am trying ta get mah life to move forwards… with Angel’s help of course” Winona nodded to Angel “and I want ta know what is happening with y’all”

Angel drank what was left of his cider before wiping his mouth “Well besides trying to set you up with a husky and deal umm… offer my assistance, I haven’t got time”

“Me neither, nothing as ghastly as a male trying to get it where he can” Opalescence hissed “still it is hard enough scaring ponies away from Rarity so she gives me the care and attention I deserve”

Tank sighed “I was in love once, many years ago, it was a fine spring and we saw each other from opposite hills” his head drooped and a tear formed in the corner of his eye “As we ran to each other, she slipped and fell on her back, no matter how hard I ran I-I just couldn’t make it”

Owlowiscious wrapped a wing around the crying tortoise “its ok you tried your best” he reassured the sobbing reptile “yeah it is hard for me too, being nocturnal and all”

“I don’t see how that is a problem” Angel rose an eyebrow as he folded his arms and rested his chin on the table

“Well I have a thing for peacocks, the whole feather display just woohoo” Owlowiscious shook as he thought of the sea of colours “But unfortunately I’m awake when they are asleep so it is a bit hard to approach them”

Angel nodded “Don’t worry I’ll ask around for you… how are you awake now anyway?”

“Coffee” Owlowiscious replied quickly “Lots of coffee”

Gummy sighed as the group looked at him “I wath in love once with…” he smiled as he rocked back and forth “a mare, blond mane, orange fur, thuple lipth”

Winona scratched her chin “Why does that sound like Applejack?” she puzzled

“It wath” Gummy smiled, his empty gums slightly disgusting Opalescence “I would thneak out and thee her, we kiththed” this tongue sprayed saliva over the table as he continued his passionate retelling of his past

Opalescence leaned forward “What happened? I don’t imagine her going out with you no offence but… the lack of teeth put me off”

“I told her thome bad newth and thhe bucked me, in my mouth” Gummy felt around his gums with a claw as he looked down sadly “thhe thaid that I would alwayth be thpecial… thhe loved my eyeth”

Angel nodded in agreement “Yeah they certainly are something” one eye hovered on him whilst the other looked over at Winona “So… this has but an awkward mood on things”

“Got any more catnip?” Opalescence asked mainly out of desperation

Winona only just managed to process the information she had just heard “Ya know what? I’ll have some too”

“Same here” Owlowiscious shuffled away from the alligator

Tank looked around “Could you bring some over for me as well?”

Angel gagged as he walked over to the sofa and pulled some bags from beneath the cushions “Well let’s hope this stuff can burn that image from my mind” he shuddered as he imagined Applejack and Gummy French kissing under the moonlight on Sweet Apple Acres

The ponies all laughed amongst themselves as they stepped into Fluttershy’s house, they silenced as they saw the sight before them

Tank was curled up in his shell, Owlowiscious was perched on top of him hooting quietly. Opalescence was curled around Angel and they both snored as the laid in Angels bed. Winona was the unfortunate sleeper to have her head stuck in Gummy’s jaws, obviously the scent of Applejack and drawn him to her

“Aww aren’t they just precious?” Rarity smiled, not wanting to disrupt the loving scene

Pinkie smiled but she cheered quietly “This gives me an idea! We should have a slumber party!”

“Ya know what? I am up for that” Applejack smiled, attempting to keep her gaze from passing to the sleeping alligator that lovingly held her dog in his jaws “Ah remember when he kissed me that way” she whispered fondly

“I haven’t got anything to do tomorrow so eh what the hay” Rainbow Dash shrugged in agreement

Twilight rolled her eyes as the gazes passed to her “I guess that this is taking place at mine again?”

The girls laughed again as they began to follow Twilight back to her library, Fluttershy stopped “Oh you girls go on ahead, I just have to do something” she quietly crept into the house and slowly trotted over to the rabbit’s bedside

Nuzzling the sleeping bunny gently awake he groaned as a splitting headache tore through his skull “What?” he asked quietly but angrily

“I um…” Fluttershy smiled nervously “Need a favour… if that’s ok”