When Bad Fics Get Worse

by tajjetone

Rating: mature
Tags: Rainbow Dash, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Human, Other
Length: 2584

Second-person stuff that's really bad. You probably shouldn't read this.

thats so kawaii ranebow dash ^_^

Published 2012-08-12 06:34:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-08-24 23:12:32 UTC

Rainbow Dash 1

You wake up to another horrible day, groaning and coming to the realization that you will, in fact, have to get out of bed.

You open your closet and tangled up inside you find a cyan mare with a rainbow-colored mane, tied up and dangling from an incredibly strong rod.

You begin to untie the pony so unfortunately restrained in your closet, who stretches and looks up at you with a mixture of curiosity and fear, her svelte equine body tense and her glassy magenta eyes flicking about intently. You slowly, carefully drop to one knee, hands outstretched in a universal gesture to indicate you pose no threat. She looks down at you curiously, the cyan equine's head now slightly above yours. You appear to have succeeded in calming the mare, as her stance relaxes visibly. "...Can you speak? What is your name? What are you doing here?" you ask, the sound of your voice causing the pony to start briefly in alarm, but she stays silent for a moment.

"I might ask the same of you," a rather indignant voice responds a moment later, the clarity of the equine's voice rather startling. "I was just taking a nap. Where have you taken me?" Her eyes narrow suspiciously, and she takes a step forward aggressively, causing you to instinctively back up slightly.

You silently bring the rope to bear as the cyan pony advances, then manage to restrain her once more with a lunge, the equine's face a picture of enraged, but silent, protest. "Whoa, okay," you start to explain in a defensive manner as possible, "I just woke up and I was opening my closet to, you know, to get clothes out. I just found you here. Understand?" The mare glares at you. You sigh. "Look, I have no fucking clue what's going on either." You see acquiescence on the face of the pony. "Just don't Sonic Rainboom my house or some such shit," you mutter, which immediately grabs the mare's attention.

"How'd you know about that?" she blurts, peering at you through half-lidded

magenta eyes. "This isn't Equestria-- is it?"

After a moment of explanation, a pony with a look as bemused as yours nods slowly. "Alright, that's... that's pretty gay, you know," she responds, grinning slightly.

You continue tying Dash up, extra rope around the wings ensuring the security of your bonds. She shoots you a funny look, so you pull out your dick and shove it in her butt.

"BUT I POOP FROM THERE!" she cries out in dismay.

"NOT TODAY YOU DON'T!"

You scratch lazily down her back, your other hand pulling her hips closer, then ejaculate forcefully into her anal cavity. Then you take a ballpoint pen and stab her eyes out, shoving it through the optical nerve and directly into the front of her brain until you're entirely sure she's dead,and then start hitting her with a sledgehammer for good measure. Once you're done, you throw her out the window.

Suddenly, a very pissed off Princess Motherfucking Celestia teleports into your room with Pinkie Pie, rapes you in half, gouges your eyes out, and shoves your remains into a food processor before having Pinkamena bake you into delicious cupcakes.

GOOD END

LIKE DIS IF U CRY EVER TIM

Tom the Boulder 1

You are taking a walk, and suddenly find a relatively large boulder blocking your path. Interested, you roll it home, breaking down one of your walls to fit the entirety of its rocky mass inside.

"I will call you Tom," you say. It seems to be a name befitting a large piece of what seems to be igneous rock-- although, not being a geologist of any renown, you really couldn't know or care.

Tom fixes you in his stony glare, and you feel weak and unimportant. Is this how he should be treating his rock-parent? No!

You decide to ground Tom. This will surely teach him not to disrespect you so.

Tom, however, has been under some very hrad times recently. Tom doesn't feel like himself anymore. Tom has been growing hair in strange places and has just not been feeling like himself recently. All of his friends are already metamorphic, and he feels like he should be gneiss, but he just isn't yet. This makes him jealous, and all the other rocks tease him for it.

Tom attempts to express this to you, but nothing happens but for a bit of condensation that runs down his rocklike features.

You place your palm on Tom's smooth shoulderminerals. "It's okay, Tom. I know how it feels-- you just can't be disrespectful. You can't let how you feel affect how you act so overtly."

Tom hangs himself. The end.

this is literally the worst shit I have ever written

Octavia 1

You wake up, and find a gray mare with a black mane pinned under your table. Fuck. Not this again.

Oh well.

You manage to lift the table off of the pony trapped underneath. She draws herself to her hooves, looking at you and blushing lightly, opening her mouth as if to speak, but she doesn't get the chance. You grab her by the scruff of the neck and ram your fist into her jaw, drawing out a squeal of agony as she attempts to squirm out of the way of your inevitable blows. A moment later, you drop the broken mare, who spits out a couple of broken teeth as she looks up at you in fear.

That's better.

You smirk down at the gray pony, who pushes herself to a more stable position before turning her pleading purple eyes up toward you. "P--Please, sir," she manages feebly, but to no avail as you slip out of your pants and eye her predatorily, causing her face to pale as your strong arms pry her soft legs open widely. You survey your prize with a grin dancing about your lips, the warm gray body below you quivering in mixed fear and anticipation.

May as well.

Smirking as you push the mare's legs apart, you can feel her tense in anticipation, writhing helplessly on the ground before you. Her face is bloodied, twisted into a breathless gasp as you swiftly hilt yourself in her warm, tight cunt. She moans uselessly on the ground, constantly pleading with those wide purple eyes, but her screams only fuel your erection as you plow yourself rather rudely into her.

The mare moans loudly as you thrust powerfully into her forcefully-opened legs, filling her with your seed. Helpless to resist, her back arches and she draws in a quick breath. Pulling out, you deliver a swift kick to her flank as you tower above the weakened mare.

But that's getting old. You slide the table back over the gray pony, who whimpers in defeat before you exit the room.

Moments later, you return carrying a tutu and push the table off the helpless mare. Forcing it onto her, you nod in approval, then keep kicking her bruised flank until a purple blotch can be seen under her gray hair. "This is getting boring," you comment dryly. "I wonder what I'll do next."

Ah, yes. You'll ask the pony thread. They'll know what to do.

You hesitate, resting a hand lightly upon Octavia's tangled mane. "Octavia-- that's your name, isn't it?" you say softly, your fingers running through her knotted hair. She nods slightly, and you smile ever so gently down at her. "Octavia, I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you," you croon, the gray mare looking first confused and then smiling back at you. "Will you forgive me?"

"It's... I forgive you," she rasps through heaving breaths.

"Excellent," you say with a beaming smile, grabbing her tail and shoving your cock into her anus. Her anal cavity is hot and tight, but it hurts her more than you.

"Why--what are you doing?" she asks in panic, the succulent globes of her ass clenching around your member.

"Uhm... make-up sex?" you answer tentatively, one hand scratching down her back and the other pulling her hips closer to you as your balls slap against her ass.

Octavia manages a few mumbled words before she is cut off by her own loud moans as your seed pours directly into her anal cavity. Then she passes out.

"Hm," you say, your softening dick still jammed into the unconscious mare's anus.

Then you put her in your car, drive out to a cornfield, and set her up as a scarecrow.

thats so kawaii

6 ponys were on a hill and they were twilit sparkle and flutershy and ranebow dash and applejack and also pinky pie and then another 1 who was rarity. then they smiled becaus they wer hapy becaus they wer w/ theyre frends ^_^ . twilit sparkle did som magic that madde a tea cup go up to her mouth and she take a drink. they were at a tea party too. then ranebow dash says

"hey girls i dont no if i hav sed this b4 but i m a lesbean (that means i like other girls not boys in a sexual way)

"thats ok ranebow dash u can b who u want 2! said twilit sparkle "i red about lesbeans and its o.k. 2 b that way u can b who u want 2 r.d. ^_^ (ranebow dash)"

then rarity seid "i m also a lesbean and i make dress 2 lets do make overs! it wil b so fun:"

then pinky pye sad "thats so kawaii ranebow dash (kawaii is the japanese for cute :3" )

and apple jack siadd "rarity u r 2 polit sumtims i m not a leabesn an i think it ois not o.k. 2 b that way r.d. and alslo i like stallions (boy ponys) like big macintosh and in a sexual way (we r also brothr so dont tel) "

then they al went 2 twilit sparkle tree house 4 a sleep over and she had book for sleep over. it said how 2 sleep over. she red the book and it said

how 2 sleepover 4 dumys

step 1 (do this fisrt) : go to a place
stpe 2 : do make over
step 3: (do this after 1 but do 2 first) : have pillow fihgt
setp 5 : go 2 slep :3
step 6: now u have had a sleep over congradulashons!!!!1

"o no" twilit sparkle sed

"wat is it t.s?". ,flutershy seid.

twilit sparkle"1 page is gon"

"o no lets look i will ask anegel 2 c if he has seen it. flutershy"

"ok than k u flutershy" twilits parkle say

then anegel cam in n he had the page of story ^_^

then twilit sparkle and flutershy and rd and aj and also pinky pie and rarity had sleep over nd ranebow dash sex up them al whil they sleep (excep aj bcus she is homofobe and do her brother instead w/ the sex)

Twilight Sparkle 1

You open the door of your closet to find a purple filly with a doll. She looks up at you in alarm, hugging the doll close to her downy fur, and takes a step back nervously.

You take a cautious step back, the glassy eyes of the almost anthropomorphically infantile equine in front of you reflecting her fear. You bend down, taking a knee to support yourself, staring bemusedly at her as the unicorn reflects her own curiosity in her eyes, still hugging the ratty doll close as she takes a small step forward.

..."I'm Twiwight Spawkul," comes a hesitant and entirely unexpected voice, her face attempting something of a shy smile.

You smile softly at the equine's tentative, infantile voice. "Hello, Twilight Sparkle," you respond in as soothing a manner as possible. "My name is Anon. How did you get here-- but first, are you hungry?" You smile gently, the filly in front of you pausing hesitantly before nodding eagerly, a sheepish smile gracing her face-- one more expressive than may have been expected from an equine.

"Um... Yes, Mister Anon," she says quietly, smiling. "Do you--" she pauses, tentatively taking another step forward-- "Do you have any hay?"

You gently pick up the filly Twilight, who starts before calming in your grasp, the purple-haired equine warm and fidgeting slightly in your grasp. Also, you're fucking Iron Man, because do you have any idea how heavy that would be? I mean, shit. Anyways, you whip out your dick and stick it in her butt.

"Um... mister Anon, sir? I--I poop from there."

"Not today you don't, Twilight Sparkle."

You ram forward repeatedly into the writhing equine's tight asshole, then finally fill her anus with your seed. Satisfied, you lie back on your bed, but she gets annoying so you stab her eyes out with a ballpoint pen and shove it through her optical nerve. Satisfied that she's dead, you send her to a glue factory. Then Princess Celestia teleports into the room and asks where her apprentice is, so you kill her too. You're a rich man.

GOOD END

Rainbow Dash 2

So

We're doing this again

You wake up and you're all like

shit

because there's a fucking pegasus on your bed

It looks so cute and innocent

It's Rainbow Dash

Didn't you kill her earlier?

Oh, well. What to do? Tear off her wings and fuck her, that's what.

So then you're all like "Yo Rainbow Dash wake up you derp"

and then she wakes up, yeah?

And she's all like "Last night was fun"

So then you tear her wings off with your bare hands. She's all like "What the fuck bro?" but you just hit her with them until she shuts up.

Then you roll on top of her and stick your penis into her special place and she makes weird noises like it hurts but maybe she likes it but she's moving around a lot too. So then a funny white thing comes out of your penis and covers her because you freak out and don't know what is going on because your penis feels like it is going to explode (but it doesn't)

Oh no! What will you do next?-- who are we kidding? We know what happens next.

The cyan mare shudders under your touch, her soft furred body squirming lightly as your seed pours into her. She looks up at you with glassy magenta eyes, and then she farts. Then you beat her up with her own wing and throw her to the floor, stepping over to her and grabbing her by her neck. Your fist meets her face with jaw-shattering force, a sickening crunch accompanying her helpless scream.

She literally will not stop screaming. What a cunt. You should do something about it, so you shove Dash's face into a pillow, pushing her down against your bed. Leaning forward, you nibble on her ear lightly. "Bite the pillow, Rainbow Dash. I'm going in dry." Then you put your dick in her butt. She cries and screams a little bit, but it's not as loud, so that's okay. Then you cum all over her and it's kind of messy and she looks a little bit grossed out and then you pull a garden weasel out from under your bed and stab it through her eyes, mulching her brains. It's all bloody but the look on her face as she was scrambled was just adorable.