Ramblin' Roads/ Prankin' Producers

"Okay, okay, I get! I'm a horrible demon person, now let me get the source of all this out of your house!"

After letting the farmer and every one of his family members insult me I was shown to where the alligator was being kept. Some of those insults would make a sailor blush!

The homestead had on it a small shack which is where the farmer led me to. With minimal effort, the burly farm pony threw the barred and locked shed door aside. Once the door was almost off its hinges I heard a loud hiss come from inside the building. I poked my head I rubbed my eyes in disbelief.

That damn lizard got even bigger. It's thick scaled tail was poking out the small window in the back because it was too big to fit in the room.

I turned to the farmer, who looked at me like I just pissed on his grandmas grave or something, and asked him about the security.

"What's with the bolts and locks? What happened?"

"What do ya think ya dungheap, there's a demon if ever there was one!"

"Ah, I see, well that demon will be leaving with me. Sorry to hear he gave you trouble. One more question, where are the items that were on the alligator."

"Pfft, ya ratbrain...the items are in the storm cellar."

"Let me greet the...uh...demon and I'll head over and grab them."

I cautiously walked through the shed before arriving at the scaled behemoth. I lowered myself onto my feet

"Hey demon, you feel like jumping off another waterfall or pulling plows for cowboys?" It lazily opened its right eye in response.

"Oh come on, really?" It blinked.

"If I had my fucking pitchfork-"

"Ya havin' trouble in there, chucklehead?"

I wish ponies weren't so strong, then I could just give 'em a right hook. Then break my hand on his jaw because of my noodle arms. I leaned down and whisper to the alligator, who I still doubt understand anything I say.

"Hey, if ya get up and get ready I'll...er...prank the farmer."

The alligator, with no hesitation, was up and already leaving the shack. You have got to be kidding me. The farmer led me and the diregator over to the storm cellar. I brought everything up the stairs and loaded them onto the unnamed alligator. Things like my lantern, bloody 'n ripped shirt, and my minuscule camping supplies were among them.

On my last trip up the cellar stairs, I noticed a small shovel and the gears in my mind started turning, a malicious prank was brewing.

"Hey, are you going to use this shovel down here. If not can I have it?"

"If ya got the bits." The farmer's dry chuckle echoed down the stone stairs.

"I could always leave that demo-"

"Fine, fine! Take the damn shovel."

Jesus, I didn't even get to finish speaking. Dude must hate the idea of the alligator staying around.

I picked up the short shovel. Once I double checked the loaded-up cargo I led the alligator over to the border of the homestead guided by the farmer.

"Now ya better steer clear of here from now on, son" I nodded my head and acted like I was leaving.

Once he turned around I used the small shovel to get some of the...fertilizer and then flinged it with all of my noodle arm power. Now my aim is pretty bad, I aimed for his head and it hit his...posterior dimensions.

Needless to say, I jumped on the alligator and we bolted. I think the prank was successful if the curses in the distance were anything to go by. Man, it feels so good to laugh, it feels like it has been too long. The alligator slowed down after a while till it was just us two on the road.

"So...how's life?"

The alligator only grumbled in response.

On the way back to Appleloosa I started thinking about everything that's happened to me.

How'd my life go from working as a librarian to conversing with an alligator about its quality of life? How can I understand the pony language? How am I so calm? I mean, I even jumped off a waterfall a while back!

I shook my head to clear up the unanswered questions and turned my gaze towards appaloosa.

We arrived on the outskirts of Appleloosa after a few more minutes of walking. I hopped off the alligator and speed-walked into town and towards the sheriff's office after telling it to stay put. I entered the town and got to the sheriff's office rather quickly. I opened the creaky door and walked in.

The sheriff greeted me with a small wave.

"Howdy partner."

"Hello, I just wanted to tell you I got my alligator and I'm planning to leave tonight for Stone Haven. I wanted to ask that instead of giving me the train ticket you could lend me some traveling supplies. Y'know, 'cause the train is currently filled with holes and all that jazz."

"All the way ta Stone city? I can give ya some supplies but you'll have to make it last."

"Yep. How's it like?"

"Stone Haven?"

"Yeah."

The sheriff got up from behind his desk and started walking out the office, he gestured for me to follow him.

"It's pretty big and mighty mysterious. In the past, it was a giant fortress meant to stand against the natural forces of the badlands it's said to be infused with fancy-schmancy runes and magic. However, the fortress was turned city by the stone family years ago."

"Wow, so I'm heading to a big shot city?"

"Big 'nough for the royals ta visit."

We started leaving the town and started heading into the orchard.

"Royals?"

"Don'tcha know the royal sisters?"

"Er...I don't get out much."

After walking through the orchard and during the conversation we reached a barn.

"That must be an understatement. How could ya not know the twin sisters, they're known worldwide."

He pulled the large red door opening up the barn.

"What're their names?"

"You're serious ain'tcha? Their names are Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. I can't quite remember the last names."

Celestia? I've heard that name before I can't remember where though. He handed me two heavy burlap sacks which I assume is filled with supplies. We didn't converse much till we reached the railroad on the edge of town. I turned to him prepared to say my goodbyes.

"It was nice meeting you Sheriff Star."

"It was nice meetin' ya too ya odd lookin' monkey!"

We had a small chuckle and parted ways. I found the alligator where I left him, on the edge of town, lazily laying down. I patted his pack and we started moving southwest.

The second we stepped out of town a tumbleweed jumped me.

Author's Note

I hope you enjoyed reading!

If you see any errors please tell me.

😃