Infinite Inanimates Incorporated

by NanoMouse

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, Anthology, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Other, Original Character, Porn, Fetish, Comedy
Length: 8880

The Triple-I is known for selling inanimate objects that are actually living ponies, to be used like objects. They also tend to double as pets and sex toys. Things may not be as series as some would claim it to be.

Infinite Inanimates Incorporated, or Triple-I, is a brand new but popular company in Equestria, at least as far as anypony could tell. The whole business is shrowded in mystery and rumor, with only one consistent detail. It sold otherwise every-day items that were actually living ponies. In addition to the use that their regular object counterparts would fulfill, these object ponies would offer companionship, servantry, and even sex in many cases. Despite the whole corporation being publicly decried by Celestia herself for "slavery, brainwashing, sexual harassment, foal abuse, dark sorcery, a variety of trademark violations, public disturbances, and first degree murder," it was still able to escape all persecution while occasionally slipping an ad through the newspapers. This is a collection of loosely related stories about the customers that see these ads, the so-called "victims" that end up purchased, and all the nonsense that leads to a majority of opinions about the Triple-I remaining positive.
Things may not be as serious as they seem at a glance.

Inspired mostly by Sir Hat's "The Curse"

Content Warnings by Chapter:
Coin Bag: Bizarre Biology, F/M, Analingus, Bowel Movements, Public Shenanigans With Shame, "Urine" Drinking, Oral Sex, Mention of Full Tour Vore, Watersports

Published 2019-08-04 11:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-08-04 11:10:01 UTC

Coin Bag

Sugar Lily's pale violet ears perked up at the doorbell. Though she had been waiting in anticipation for only three whole days, the circumstances of this purchase caused nearly every waking minute to be drawn out in anticipation. The earth pony mare generally considered herself to be a perfectly good, law-abiding citizen, so the somewhat impulsive but certainly illegal purchase had been driving her crazy. As she walked to the door, her amber eyes darted around as if guards were about to ambush her from within her own home. It probably didn't help her unease that the time was currently midnight, and she had a perfectly healthy aversion to the concept of being unable to see what's right in front of her.

Her apartment door opened with a slight creak, fluttering her pink mane from a short gust of wind. A dark blue thestral stallion was revealed with sky-blue eyes and a pair of saddle bags. "Delivery for Sugar Lily?" His tone was somewhat hushed, yet still loud compared to the utter silence of everywhere else. He had a small box on his outstretched left wing, smaller than she was expecting at least. Her response was a nod, and to give him a bank note of 100 bits that she had been holding in her teeth. He accepted it wordlessly, dropped the box inter her outstretched forelegs, and flew off into the impenetrable (by her eyes) darkness.

With the head-sized box now inside, Lily felt at a slight loss as to what to do, how she should greet her new "coin bag". These were the same thoughts that demanded her attention for the last few days, yet still gave her no form of conclusion. Initially, she told herself that this was just her being heroic, that she'd just free this pony, protect him/her, and help with anything he/she'd need to live a comfortable life. But, she couldn't deny that she was a bit more selfish than that. Her life was mostly sweet-making befitting a lollipop cutie mark, reading, and visiting museums. This left her with a lack of real friendship that made her feel lonely during the times she wasn't distracting herself. It didn't help that the owners of her apartment very explicitly forbade pets. In addition, she had always fully intended to pay for her purchase, with money that would no doubt help the company sell even more "products".

"Hey uh, somepony did pick me up, right? I wasn't just imagining that?" The sudden masculine voice broke the stupor that Lily hadn't even realized she'd fallen into. She had no idea how long the boxed up pony had been waiting.

"OH! Sorry for the wait, ah, I'll open your box in just a second!" was her unsteady response, as she quick dashed away for a crowbar. The box was wooden, but she wasn't actually sure how tightly it was sealed. It had many holes in the sides and some on the top, but otherwise looked solid in its construction.

It was only once she returned that she realized that the box's occupant could just be asked "UH, what's the best way to open this crate?"

"You can cut along the top edges with a knife, the glue isn't that hard at all. Don't worry about me, I'll see through these holes."

Just like that, she was gone again, putting away the crowbar to instead return with one of her more hefty kitchen knives. He (as far as she's assuming) may have said that the glue "wasn't that strong," but she wanted to play it safe instead of guessing exactly how weak that was. "You're sure you can see where my knife is?" she questioned with concern in her voice, and at his insistence, she cut with relative ease. Before long, the lid fell inwards just to rise back up due to its newly freed occupant.

After setting the knife aside, Sugar Lily set her eyes upon a sand-colored stallion who, despite his adult-looking proportions, appeared to have the height of a toddler. Observing him further as he climbed out, she noted that his mane and tail were brown with two orange streaks, his eyes were lime green, he had a horn on his head, and most eye-catching of all, he lacked a cutie mark.

She introduced herself with "Hello, it's nice to finally meet you. I'm Sugar Lily, but you can just call me Lily," as she pointed her hoof at him.

He met it with his own that was half the size of hers, shook it, and replied with "It's nice to meet you, too. I'm your new coin bag, and I hope to help you for years to come." His smile was warm and genuine, and she returned one of her own, only for uncomfortable silence to fill the air around them. He scratched behind an ear and tentatively asked "First time buyer?" At her hesitative nodding, he continued with "Well, most ponies either start by inspecting me to try and find where the actual bag is, or by asking me to demonstrate with one of their bits."

Seeing no such bag or pocket attached to the stallion, she grabbed a bit that happened to be lying on a table close by and gave it to him. As she did that, she said "Okay, I'll take a demonstration, then."

He ate it. Into the air he threw the coin, before catching it in his mouth with a loud gulp. Surprisingly, there was no visible bulge in his throat, despite the coin being wider than it. "Because I am the bag," he explained, "I don't have a real stomach, or digestive system. Most of that is replaced with a more spacious sack for carrying coins. It's enchanted to be bigger on the inside than it is on the outside, so I can store thousands of coins without issue." As he finished that sentence, he turned around and lifted his tail into the air. To Lily's shocked, blushing face, it revealed his ponut and all the parts that make a pony male. To her further astonishment, he gave a grunt and a groan as his picker twitched and bulged, but not much more was happening. "Security of bits is appreciated by many, but it means I need a little help getting started."

Lily wasn't sure if it were physically possible to become any more red, yet she couldn't turn away. This was too important for that, obviously, no other reason. Still, she had no idea what he meant by "Help?" so that is just what she said.

"Some unicorns have the telekinetic control to use only their magic. Those without that skill can use their horns, but most ponies in general rely on their tongues." Noticing her blanch, he quickly followed up with "Don't worry, I don't make poop so I'm always very clean back there."

'Gee, thanks,' she thought to herself, 'that totally makes this any easier to bear.' Despite her mental complaints, she did eventually comply. That was a bit she'd have to get back, after all, and possibly more if this stallion got to them. Maybe it was his pained expression at having to squeeze out something woefully big compared to his exit, maybe it was just sheer curiosity, or maybe she was just tired and ready to give in to nearly anything. Regardless of reason, her tongue was burying itself in his surprisingly spacious rectal cavity, going just deep enough to find where the coin was lodged inside of him. As if her tongue were magnetic, the coin was pulled out with relatively little effort on either pony's parts, with the 'coin bag' even relaxing the moment he felt her tongue.

With a light thud the bit fell to the carpeted floor. Somehow, it was almost entirely dry, save for a drop of Sugar Lily's saliva. That was weird because his insides were most certainly moist, she'd know because she was just licking inside of them. As she returned it to the table where she found it, she asked "And I'm supposed to do that in public? Around other ponies?"

"Yep." There was no hint of irony or sarcasm in the stallion's response. "Lastly, while most ponies don't expect it, I do have a bladder that needs emptying sometimes. My belly is always cleaning dirt off it itself, and that dirt goes to the bladder. Some water from time to time could help with that, and don't worry, your money won't stay wet. Speaking of, could I have a cup of water?"

She froze for a second, most of the information flying right over her tired head. She muttered a "Sure," before trotting off to fulfill that last request of his. At least that was reasonable enough, there was no telling if she could take any more insanity before just passing out. The weirdest part out of all of that was the way it felt like it made sense in her head.

Yawning as she returned, she hoofed him the cup of water before murmuring "Really tired, gotta sleep now." These words didn't immediately register in her coin bag, who was distracted by the chilly goodness in a cup. As he finished, it finally dawned on him that she had just wandered off to bed, without even turning off the lights! Unfortunately, he was too short to turn any of them off, so he settled on just making sure that wouldn't happen again. That left him with a different issue, though. Well, he technically didn't need to sleep due to napping most of the way here, and he'd inevitably have plenty of time to nap when his owner wasn't shopping. Still, said only owner had pretty much left him to fend for himself, and the only way he knew how to make the night pass was to snooze it away.

Setting the empty cup by the table leg, he wandered the over-sized (to him, at least) house before finally stumbling upon Lily's dozing form in her room. The bed was about twice as tall as he was, but with a ledge from the bed frame, he was able to eventually hoist himself up. Sure, there was the couch in the living room he just left, but that didn't have any blankets or real pillows, and he was done with the barely padded crate he arrived in. Sure, she might be a little weirded out when she woke up next to him, or maybe even a little upset, but he felt confident that she'd get over it, and hoped just a little bit in his heart that maybe she'd let him back in.

With a little yawn, the coin bag settled himself in right next to her, close enough that in her sleep she even wrapped a foreleg around him, as if he was a plushie. He mentally 'daw'ed at this, feeling completely right as fell into peaceful slumber.

"EEEEEK!"

A feeling of complete and crushing wrongness is what the coin bag pony had to wake up to. As if the shrill shriek wasn't enough to make him panic, he was also thrown off of the bed and entirely out of his sleep.

Meanwhile, Sugar Lily was having a panic attack of her own. With memories of the previous night still fuzzy in her mind, all she could tell was that something had somehow climbed into bed with her. That something was warm, fuzzy, and small, leaving one of two possibilities for her to immediately consider. Either it was an animal, which could get her kicked out if anypony saw it as a "pet", or it was a foal, a possibility she had no way to properly wrap her still not fully awakened mind around, and would be extra bad because it meant her knee-jerk reaction had just thrown a child across the room.

Practically jumping out of bed, she saw a momentarily perplexing sight. A sandy yellow pony was sitting in a corner, facing it while sobbing to himself. For a harsh moment Lily thought she really did just lob an innocent foal into the wall, until the previous night finally caught up with her. She remembered her "coin bag" arriving, how he utterly surprised her in so many ways, and how she definitely did not remember showing him any place to sleep.

That didn't matter now, though. That pony was still crying, so she quickly rushed to his corner to ask "Hey, I'm sorry for throwing you. I didn't know what was going on, and reacted without thinking. Are you hurt? Can you forgive me?"

Her words were slow to register in the stallion's mind, which up until that point had been flooded with thoughts of crushing failure, and how his owner must hate him because he wasn't being good. When he did realize what she said, he responded with "Y- You're not mad...?"

"No, of course not!" Lily nearly shouted that, but pushed her voice into something more reasonable to avoid scaring what now seemed to her like a poor colt even more. Suddenly, she reached out and pulled him close into a hug, which he wordlessly accepted. "That was all my fault. I shouldn't have left you in the living room like that. I really shouldn't have swatted you away."

As he now pushed back into the hug, she heard only a whisper from him: "Thank you."

Then Lily's stomach growled loudly, causing both pairs of eyes to shoot open. "Ah, well," she laughed awkwardly at the thoroughly ruined moment, "how about we get some breakfast?"

"Money!" Was his cheer, which she supposed was appropriate considering what he had eaten yesterday. It wasn't what she had in mind, but it would work.

Some fifteen minutes later, and she had collected all the bits from her former wallet (a plain cloth bag) as well as all of the odd coins that she could find around her part of the apartment. She had piled them on the kitchen table, before moving on to her fridge. The stallion was already gulping down bit after bit at a ferocious pace, probably already halfway through the pile. Like before, there was no bulge anywhere one him, or anything that would suggest that there was any coinage present inside any part of him. Thinking on that made her realize about the "name" of her new companion.

"I remember asking you to introduce yesterday," she began, "but you only told me what you are. What's you name?"

"Don't have one," he gulped five golden coins down at once before continuing, "Lots of ponies name their own equinanimates after purchase."

"...'Equinanimates'?"

The "equinanimate" swallowed again before speaking. "Heard it once or twice before," another gulp, "think it's experimental, unofficial. There's no real word for us right now, so..."

Lily rolled the word around her mouth as she decided to just make a quick daisy sandwich instead of wasting any more time trying to decide on food. She didn't let that last long, though, she had something more important to think about. "What kind of name would you like?"

"If it works for you, it works for me," he replied, now able to speak longer phrases as there were only a few coins left on the table. He was now patting his belly in satisfaction.

However, that left very little for Lily to work with. She wasn't even sure at this point how different he would be compared to other coin bag ponies. She had gotten the impression from his complete lack of a real diet that he only truly had the mind of a pony. As in, for all she knew, most coin bag ponies looked exactly the same in addition to having the same weird abilities. Triple-I had to have more than one in stock, after all, and this stallion did remind her a lot of the picture in the newspaper, except not in black and white.

Finally, she came for what she felt was a passable decision. "What about... Golden Chocolate?" He might not give her much to work with, but she knew one thing for sure: she would have a hard time living with a pony that didn't like sweets.

"I like it!" The freshly-coined Golden Chocolate shouted before switching to a more inquisitive expression, "Wait, what does chocolate taste like? Can I even eat it?"

"Only one way to find out!" declared Sugar Lily, heading over to her fridge to grab a miniature chocolate bar. As she handed it to him, she explained that "I don't have any chocolate coins on hoof, but this is the same flavor."

Golden Chocolate held his pseudo-namesake in his hooves, sniffing it once before sucking it into his mouth. Strangely, he didn't chew, and he also didn't use levitation, unlike most unicorns. Thinking back on it, he hadn't done so with his giant coin pile, either. "MMMM!" That was his sudden voice expressing deep pleasure, evidently. After swallowing the sweet, he asked "Can I be a chocolate bag instead? That tasted so much better!"

Lily chucked to herself before realizing yet another question entered her mind. Since it was the freshest, and now that Golden was no longer eating, she decided to ask it first. "Wait, didn't you say so don't really have a stomach?" he nodded before she continued, "So, what's going to happen to my money in there?"

"That's what we're finding out, right? Come check." With that he presented his rear end to her, giving her an even better glance at his anus and ball-sack in the sunlight from the window. At least his penis was sheathed (right now), so it was just a little easier to not think about what she was technically doing.

With Lily's tongue once more exploring Golden's fleshy inner sack, the difference compared to last time was clear. It felt far more spacious than yesterday, and she was even able to sift through the coins until reaching the first of the chocolate... or so she expected. Instead, there just was no chocolate. She pulled out, before being startled by a sudden desperate cry of "No! Why'd you stop so soon? It felt so good, I don't want it to end yet!" To complete the feeling, his sheathed penis had transformed into a fully hardened horse-cock.

Ignoring the pleas and her immediate blush, she forced herself to ask "Where did the chocolate go? It's not in with the coins at all."

As if flicking the switch, his face instantly switched into an expression befitting the phrase "Oh, I need to pee."

After quickly hustling the pint-size stallion to her bathroom and shutting the door, Sugar Lily sat down with her back to the door. The twists to her mind and roller-coasters of shock were really starting to get to her. It was hard to understand how somepony could switch between "cute, innocent colt" and "sexy, perverted stallion" so frequently. Beyond her questions, it was confusing how she could act like a mother to him one moment, and then eat out his butthole just a few minutes later. At least she had this moment to herself, while oh yeah, he was peeing out chocolate that he ate barely five minutes ago. "Can you open the door? I can't really reach the nob." And just like that, the moment was gone.

For some reason, when he spotted her, his face immediately shifted into sadness. "Huh, why are you crying?"

She was crying? She touched a hoof to her face, and sure enough, it came away wet. She had no idea why- no, she did have a pretty good idea. "It's okay, Golden. I was just... contemplating." Saying that felt underwhelming to her, but she wasn't sure she could express it in any other way.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" And then there was this Golden Chocolate, an understanding companion that wants only to make her happy. And so, for sixty solid minutes, she vented. She complained, she questioned, but she never gave time for answers, nor did Golden try to offer them. Halfway through her tirade he hugged her, but that didn't stop her. Soon enough she was talking about her life in general, about the full extent of her previous loneliness. At the end she went as far as talking about what her parents were like before they passed away, and the difficulty in moving on. There was probably even more that she didn't even remember blurting out. By the end, she was extra glad that this was a Sunday, as she didn't have to work on that day. She'd certainly be late otherwise.

"Wow I, ah, I'm really glad to have you, despite whatever I said. I haven't been able to do something like that in a decade." was her last words to end the rant.

"I'm glad to be here for you. Now, why don't we talk more on your couch? I can answer some of those questions, if you want."

They hadn't spoken right away, in fact Sugar Lily had taken a nap for a few minutes with just Golden Chocolate for a pillow. Before long, she had awoken with a fairly fresh mind, and thankfully did not her coin purse pony anywhere. "So, questions?" was his prompt after she was done yawning.

"Yeah..." she started speaking, but paused to actually remember an unanswered question. "Why do you have balls?" Her eyes went wide as she heard her own words, shocked by her own question. Though, it was technically as good as any, as the stallion had a tendency to lack a lot of other organs that normal ponies have.

Instead of blushing or getting embarrassed, he giggled at her. "What kind of living being would I be if I can't reproduce?" He have Lily a few seconds to let that sink in before explaining more, "If you get a female coin bag pony, you can start a family and make all the little coin bags you want!"

"Uh, OK... Next question," she rushed to not linger on that topic, "How old are you?"

"Five-" Lily gasped, but he lifted a foreleg to shush her. "-days."

"What?! How?"

"While I am a pony, I am also an object made by a pony to sell to and by used by another. I don't know how specifically, but I was made. I don't have memories, but I was given a lot of knowledge when I was 'born', so I wouldn't be like a newborn foal despite technically being one." Though, she could tell that this "information" he had wasn't enough to make him into a real adult, especially if he had no cutie mark.

Speaking of... "Is it possible for you to get a cutie mark?"

"I... I've never heard of that happening, and I have no knowledge of that ever happening to an equinanimate. I personally would expect it to be possible, as I am a real pony."

"What about teeth, will you ever get those? I noticed before you weren't chewing."

"Never, I'm fairly sure. Chewed up coins aren't exactly usable."

"That makes sense. So, what magic can you do?"

"I only know teleportation, but I should be able to learn more."

She hummed at that, before asking "Why teleportation?"

"Well, it's anti-theft. If anypony takes me, I'll just teleport back to you, or just away if I don't know where you are."

"Okay then, last question..." She began as she remembered the big one, "So, how do you feel about... being sold?"

"I don't?" At the sound of her confusion, he elaborated, "I mean, I guess I'm technically a slave, but I don't care about that. I'm right where I want to be. Even if you wanted to free me, I'd just come right back to you."

She held him close again before responding, "I... Thank you I don't know how else to say it, thank you," They sighed in contentment before straightening herself. "Now, let's get this day started. I need to buy some groceries." While Golden cheered at that, Lily was less enthusiastic on the inside at the prospect of extracting funds from him in public. Still, that was part of the reason why she bought him. It didn't feel fair to him to just assume that what was essentially his purpose in life could only end in catastrophe for her.

Sugar Lily strolled through the grocery store, holding a basket in one foreleg while Golden Chocolate followed behind with another basket in his mouth. At first she had considered hiding him in a saddle bag, he would probably be just small enough. However, she realized that he could probably pass as just being her oddly skinny nephew. He didn't look too strange to be a colt, at least in her opinion, and it wasn't like anypony knew her well enough to know that she didn't actually have any nephews at all.

He could certainly act the part, which is precisely what he did as he ran from spot to spot along the shelves, marveling at the variety present at the shelves. It both helped and didn't that this was the sweets section of the store. While she caved just enough to buy him a few bars of ordinary chocolate, she was sure that her own sweets would turn him away from the plain stuff that the supermarket offered. That is, if he could stomach (or bladder, rather) that much in the first place.

The rest of the trip consisted mostly of acquiring fruits and vegetables. While he was not as enthusiastic about those, that didn't stop him from letting his curiosity rise with each new item spotted. Still, it felt like it took too little time for Lily's liking. Normally she'd be thankful that everything was so easy, but of course, there was still the payment to dread, and admittedly, she did dread it far more than she would have liked.

It didn't help that now things would slow down. All the lines were occupied, and with some sizable orders in each. Item by item, she waited until finally it could be her turn. Just as she was about to let her mind really wander, a cashier called her up, and she and Golden hoofed up their baskets.

Now for the hard part, in which Lily had no idea what to do. At the moment it wasn't like anypony was looking at her, and there thankfully wasn't anypony waiting in line behind her, but either of those could change easily. Plus, it dawned on her how stupid her cover story was because it would make what she had to do seem far more illegal than it already was. At least the single patron that asked was one of the ponies who just left, but still.

"That'll be 32 bits." The cashier was sweet, but concise. She also had a really expecting expression, which made this all the more awkward. Lily could absolutely feel it on her face. Wordlessly, she reached under Golden with a foreleg and lifted him onto the counter. Now the cashier was raising an eyebrow, especially at what Lily said next in a hushed whisper.

"So uh, I'm sure you've heard about the Triple-I...?"

"Hello!" to add to Lily's chagrin, Golden casually greeted the clerk with a wave, his deep-ish voice visibly startling her before she cleared her throat.

"You're lucky that both freaking out and leaving this register are both strictly forbidden unless there's specifically a thief or attacker on the loose." Her tone was not hushed or a whisper, rather it was deadpan but very audible. Everypony nearby turned to try and learn what the heck these crazy folk were talking about, and it didn't help that Golden was preemptively posing for the rimming needed to get the needed money. As some small, tiny, insignificant reprieve that Lily still enjoyed to the fullest, those ponies behind her were too embarrassed and confused to keep staring.

That was all she would get, though. It was nothing to prevent embarrassment from turning into shame as she placed her muzzle under his tail and began licking. It would never stop surprising her, how easy it was to pull out individual coins and even snatch some of the ones that were specifically worth 10 bits. However, each of the 5 coins withdrawn in total clattered loudly against the counter-top, and with each coin, she could feel the cashier's death glare hardening more and more. Very clearly, she would be voicing her displeasure at this so much more if only doing so wouldn't risk her job. Also, it really didn't help when the lovely words "Mommy, what is she doing to that little colt?" graced her ears from somewhere not particularly far away. With the last coin gone, Lily replaced Golden back onto the floor and the cashier immediately grabbed the five coins.

Said cashier would simply remain wordless as Lily tried to get out as fast as possible. After all of that, she would have completely forgotten about the groceries if not for Golden's teleportation spell preventing her from running away without her bags. Startlingly enough, Golden didn't seem to be disturbed by any of this at all.

With the last of the groceries stored away, Sugar Lily slumped right to the floor, without bothering to get up. Golden Chocolate immediately noticed this, laying down next to her before asking "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing, except that it was awful back there!"

"The cashier might have been rude, but-"

Lily cut him off, exacerbated by his weird mixture of perceptiveness and obliviousness. "She wasn't the rude one, that was us! We were gross and weird, and she's right about how we should've gotten in trouble for that!"

As he sputtered at that, she could almost feel his devastation, "Wuh, buh, g- gross? We... I was gross? ...Sugar Lily, please be honest. Have I been a bad pony?"

Lily wasn't sure how to reply to that, especially with him on the verge of tears. "No. You were not a bad pony. Doing it that way in public was wrong, but that just means we have to figure out how to do it better. Besides, I still like you just the way you are."

"You," he sniffs, "You mean that?"

"Absolutely, even if I have no idea how to figure it out."

"No, I think the answer's pretty simple," he proclaimed, "I have to learn more magic. If I can use levitation..." Lily nodded in response before getting back up.

"In the meantime, you want some chocolate to cheer you up?" At this offer, he quickly got up, brightened up, and nodded with a smile. "Wonderful, let me grab one of those store chocolates form the fridge..."

Just like that, it was as if he was never sad in the first place. Well, maybe that's not the best way to put it, but it was still fairly accurate. The taste of chocolate did wonders for them both, and especially to their moods. But like before, nature's call was very prompt for the stallion with only a bladder to hold his chocolate. "Say, uh, Lily...?"

"Yeah?"

There was a pause, as if Golden wasn't sure how to state what he wanted to ask. "Before, it felt kinda like a shame, to let that tasty chocolate just go..." As her confused response, he continued, "My pee was completely brown before, and slow, like it was still mostly chocolate. Maybe this'll sound even more gross to you, but what would you say to giving my eaten but intact chocolate a taste?

'Oh no' might have been her initial thought, but somehow, she couldn't say she was surprised. She certainly didn't expect to be asked that, but with all of the weirdly sexual dealings she's had with Golden up to this point, it didn't even seem uncalled for anymore. That fact was the only one to disturb her.

"I guess I am curious about that now, so sure..." They both hesitated, but only for a moment. Then, Lily lowered herself to the ground once more, this time to allow Golden to climb on top of her and let his little flaccid penis hang on front of her eyes. It was almost surreal seeing a penis that small in front of her, but she didn't let that stop her from raising her muzzle to envelop what she'd use as a straw to suck out the melted chocolate.

Like many events before, she simply could not have expectations. Well, maybe she did envision a powerful brown jet of urine to shoot down her throat, but instead, the stream was a much calmer flow of nearly pure chocolate right on top of her tongue. Evidently, the thickness of the brown goodness forced things into a comfortable pace. She could certainly accept that, and this finely melted chocolate was heaven to her, even with its dull origin. Chocolate in general was fine enough when cold, but when melted, it could introduce itself to every taste bud on her tongue with ease and just melt her heart. Still, this was also truly the urine of another pony, immediately fresh from the "tap". That would have caused her to question her life yet again, but instead, she realized it was better to enjoy herself now and talk to Golden later, if necessary. He would be here for her now and far into the future, and there was no better way to get used to it than to keep talking. Because of how she was savoring his chocolate, she hadn't even noticed that he had ran out. She also didn't notice that he was stealing another piece of chocolate, specifically to reload for more fun.

Either way, she found she didn't want to stop. Other than the fact that his penis still tasted delicious, she just didn't want to stop. Plus, it was pretty clear that Golden was enjoying himself. Who knew sucking dick could relieve stress? She did now, as she hastened the movements of her tongue to better stimulate him. She licked all over his shaft and even a little bit on his testicles. She sucked far past the point of all traces of chocolate being gone. His dick twitched once, twice, three times before salty cum ejected itself across her tongue and she stopped her intense motions. The taste wasn't really that great after getting used to the heavenly chocolate, but she didn't mind it either. Down her throat it went right as the second helping of chocolate began, Golden's greatly encouraged body needing no further prompting to grant his mare a proper reward for her service. The excellently warmed chocolate was enough to push her to clop her troubles away, with a leg shoved behind her to hoof at her clit. She didn't last long, orgasming right as the second stream of liquid chocolate came to an end.

Not wanting to continue laying on the hard kitchen floor, Lily pulled herself up to a chair and then let herself relax. Golden didn't follow suit straight away, having been panting in exhaustion during his extra time on the ground. "So, how was that?" He asked, "because I had a lot of fun!"

"It was really disgusting-" she sped up her tone at Golden's huge frown, "-but amazing! Melting chocolate is the best, even if semen doesn't mix well with it. No offense." She giggled through the inner astonishment that her mouth was the one saying anything even remotely similar to that. Even she couldn't deny that he had made her into a bit of a pervert.

Her words had the intended effect, with Golden now beaming with praise. With that settled, Lily decided that the living room would be the best place to relax for now. Ordinarily she would be checking out a museum or something on a Sunday noon like this, but she felt like she already had enough excitement for one day. The words "Mommy, what is she doing to that little colt?" in particular echoed through her mind at that prospect. Still, there was half the day left, she couldn't just do nothing at all.

They made some small chatter as they got settled in within the living room, which led to Sugar Lily asking what Golden Chocolate's life was like before being sold.

"It was mostly boring," he described, "but I at least got to hear a lot of things. The ponies that work there talk all the time, whenever they're around, at least. I'm not sure if they don't know that we listen or they just don't care. Other than that, well, I guess I should just start from the beginning..."

I woke up one day. That might sound a bit odd, some might expect a more drastic reaction to living for the first time, but from the start I was left with almost nothing. I remember my first thought simply being "I guess I'm alive now. Huh."

The location where I woke up had been a cage, which I think was large enough to just barely fit you. For a moment I tried to leave, to see if there was anything more for me to see. The door was shut tight though, and the bars were just barely dense enough to stop my head from fitting through them. Also, there was a lot of knowledge just sitting in my head, that I was just vaguely aware of. It told me that my purpose wasn't to attempt escape, it was to store somepony else's money until they needed to use it, so that he or she wouldn't need to worry about dropping it or thieves stealing it. Actually, it was kinda annoying that these bars seemed to be keeping me from my purpose, but the knowledge in my head assured me that I'd be bought before long. And look at us now, it wasn't wrong!

Meanwhile, I took to looking around the room I was in. It was a fairly large dome of stone, lit by a few random white gems that were embedded in the walls. There were maybe a couple dozen other cages just like mine in here. Like the crystals, they didn't seem to be placed with any order. Some were stacked on top of each other, others were completely alone. Each contained exactly one pony, and each of these ponies looked almost exactly alike. They were all the same size, and had some shade of tan for fur and brown on their mane and tail. I think the eyes had the only variety, there were eyes of every color that I saw. Well, there was also the body shape. About half or so looked kinda mare-ish, the others looked a bit more like stallions.

Since half of them were sleeping, and nothing was happening, I laid down and shut my eyes, too. I'm not sure how much time had passed before I heard the first voices. Before I knew it, I had eagerly rushed to be as close to the talking ponies as I could, pressing myself against the door of my cage. Out of the corner of my eyes, I could tell everypony else was doing the same.

"And next we have these," a sweet mare's voice said, "the coin bags that our team managed to slip into the Manehatten papers."

"They're... huh, why do these ones look so much like normal ponies?" pondered a baritone male voice.

"Oh, most other objects needed some extra appendage to properly function. These are just bags, though. Everypony already has a bunch inside of them, so it was only a matter of altering some unneeded organ into the main attraction."

"I see, I see." As the male pony walked into the center of the room, I got a good glance at him. He was a dark gray unicorn with a striped blue and turquoise mane and tail. His eyes were red and his cutie mark looked like it was just a black pony silhouette. For some reason, he was frowning and his eyes were darting from cage to cage, as if he were nervous. I didn't really believe that, though. I was more sure that we coin bags all had the same purpose in mind, that we'd never do anything to harm anypony.

The mare walked up after him, and I saw she was dark green with a white mane and tail, both of which were done in buns. She also had glasses over her cyan eyes, and her cutie mark was a blank notebook with a pencil next to it. Like the stallion, she had a horn on her head. "We've only had seven orders for these so far, but that should change this week because of how easily we got the ad through." The stallion opened his mouth as he turned towards the mare, but she cut him off. "And yes, we did come up with something special for these little guys, too. Their butts are too small to easily push out coins on their own- it's a security measure to minimize incontinence, you see- so they'll need some help, such as from a horn or a tongue."

For some reason, he shuddered as a response. I'm not sure why, her reasoning sounded perfectly good to me. "I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or impressed at your capability for this kind of design."

With a roll of her eyes, the mare said "It's just easiest to-"

"-To work with what's already there, no matter how sexual, I get it. I know those are my own words, I just didn't think you'd take them so... absolutely."

A hearty but posh "Oh, ha ha ha ha!" echoed through the room before the mare said "I'll forgive you for that one. At least you know I'm not called Absolute Design for nothing, dear. Besides, you haven't even seen half of it all yet. Next up are the flute ponies!"

The two walked off as their conversation became unclear again, and silence took over our chamber once more. I laid back down at the center of my cell, dozing off again. I woke up once to the sound of a large group of ponies coming in to carry away a bunch of the cages, the seven purchases I heard of before, but they left just as fast and didn't say a word or let me take a good look at any one of them.

The next actual conversation was between yet another pair of new ponies, a couple mares. One was a yellow pegasus, with orange eyes, mane, and tail. Her cutie mark was a rainbow standing on two clouds. The other was an almost entirely light blue earth pony, save for a yellow streak through her mane and tail. Her cutie mark looked like a glass of water.

"Holy cow, I had no idea there were so many of these rooms. What is this, the fifteenth? I thought there'd be a dozen at most!" the blue one shouted. I could feel the humor in the air, every coin bag pony likely knowing just how wrong she was.

"Yeah, Abby really went all out with this. However, these ones do look kinda boring, dontcha think? There's no way to tell what they even are." The yellow/orange one's statement was another from the not-inanimate ponies that I didn't get. I could tell we were coin bags easily.

"I dunno, I like the plainer ones better. They're way cuter." I felt myself blushing at the blue one's little compliment, and decided I like being cute. "Most just look wacky and weird, especially the fan, toilet, or-"

"THERE ARE TOILETS?!" shouted the yellow/orange one, disbelief splattered all over her face.

"Yeah, funny story, actually. After I had tested that carriage pony- it feels really weird being eaten and pooped out, by the way-"

"EEW!" the yellow/orange one agreed.

"-Anyways, I needed to go to the bathroom. I asked one of the supervisors where I could find one, they gave me a toilet pony to test instead." said the light blue one as they neared the exit of the room. They had been walking the whole time, just really slowly.

"Did... Was it at least good?" asked the yellow/orange one tentatively.

"Heck yeah! I'm totally buying one the moment I get enough money for it." was the last I heard of that conversation.

Did I mention that a lot of the time I spent there was just in bored silence, alone? Well, I know there were always the other coin bags, no matter how many of them were bought, but none of us spoke a word while I was there, or after, as far as I know. Now that I think about it, I'm not sure why. The idea just never crossed my mind. If we ever check out this place, we should try talking to some of the unsold equinanimates, or at least getting one to talk. Anyways, back on track, and I'll just skip the boring parts completely from now on...

The next conversation was between two stallions. One was a white pegasus with a golden mane and tail, indigo eyes, and an orange oak leaf for a cutie mark. The other was a dark blue bat pony with light blue eyes, black mane and tail, with a telescope for a cutie mark. Actually, I think he was the same guy who delivered me.

The white one was speaking first, and by speaking I mean shouting "Celestia said we were WHAT?"

"Slavers, murderers, foal abu-" the dark blue one calmly but quickly recited before his buddy cut him off.

"I know what she said, but really? We haven't done any of that! I can't believe the Princess would say anything like that, about anypony!"

"Not us personally."

"You know what I mean!"

"But, the III has done all of that by now. Or most of it, at least. It's a forbidden type of magic that makes these equinanimates-"

"What?" interrupted the white one yet again.

"Oh, you haven't heard? That's what these guys are being called now, or at least as far as I've heard. Anyways, the entire basis of the company is already illegal, but we're also owning these ponies, and they're designed in a stupidly sexual way. That's just asking for trouble, especially when nopony at all checks if children or parents are trying to buy from us. Face it, this is a real legal trail wreck and every day this business survives is a buckin' miracle."

"Oh, please! These things," spat the white one as they stopped walking. I felt a frown growing on my face as he continued with "aren't real ponies. They don't eat or poop. They don't think the way we do. They're created in weird glass pods by some weird spells. They basically all look alike. I think it's a lot better calling them golems, or something."

"They have heart beats," countered the dark blue one. "Maybe you haven't checked, but I have. Also, they grow, and they do still absolutely think. I've heard better conversations between them and the testers than some conversations between two normal ponies. And maybe you didn't know, but they can be made if two of the same type buck. I've seen one of the shirt ponies pregnant with my own two eyes. They can be considered sentient beings, and what we're doing to be slavery."

They began walking again as their speaking continued. "So then, what? What does that make us? I don't know about you, but I didn't sign up to anything to be a bad guy. Do you think I should just quit, or are they going to hold me hostage now so I don't blab?"

The last of that I heard was of the dark blue one saying "No, this place is always moving so that former employees and sold equinanimates never find it again anyways. They'll let you go if you really can't fathom the idea of something being good despite Celestia's disapproval."

Some time after that, there was a crew to take my cage away. It was just mine that time, unlike previous times which all had at least three of us removed. I think less than half of us were left by the time I was gone. Anyways, I was carried past many rooms like the one I had been living in, with many groups of equinanimates passing me by. I saw fans, water coolers, washing machines, some really varied donuts, beds, grills, loaves of bread, trees, and clocks. I didn't get to see some of the other ones I heard of before, though, like toilets or carriages. Those must've been in the other direction.

After that, I got to some room with a portal in the middle. The ponies that had been carrying me set me down and opened my cage. Right in front of the door was the box you saw me in, with the opening facing me, and that dark blue stallion standing next to it. I got the idea, walking right into it before they turned it sideways and sealed the lid on top. Thankfully it had some kind of inner lining, but it was still tighter than I would have liked, and only barely comfortable. The delivery pony grabbed me and headed through the portal, which dropped him off in essentially the middle of nowhere. Really, it was a desert or something, and it was nighttime.

We started flying right away, and at first I was a little freaked out. However, I could tell the pony carrying me had a pretty good grip, so I didn't worry long. I watched as we passed over land, then buildings, then a forest where he took a break to sleep during the whole day. Another night passed the same way, and then shortly after the third night began, I arrived.

"And that's the whole story," concluded Golden Chocolate.

Sugar Lily blinked, still digesting some of this new information, and moreso trying to understand some of the parts that he hadn't quite. That was, until she felt and heard her stomach growl. Looking out the window, the orange color of the sky was also notable. "I think I should make myself some supper. Something big, I think I skipped lunch."

Golden responded with an "Okay!" as they went to the kitchen. Aside from a bit of instruction by Lily to help him cook, neither said much during that time or while she ate and Golden sipped at a cup of water. It wasn't an awkward silence, but a comfortable one. Lily never realized just how nice it could be to have somepony around the house, no matter what kind of pony.

When she finished, it was nearly nighttime. Then she remembered about how she still needed to give Golden a proper place to sleep, and it seemed like he had the same idea in his head as he asked "Hey, is it okay if I sleep with you again? Last night was really good." Or maybe not, not entirely at least.

'Well,' she thought to herself, 'Or maybe that would be good...' Deciding upon that, she declared "Sure. In fact, let's go to bed now. I'm going to find a book to read for the rest of the day, and you can go on ahead."

It hadn't taken her too long to find a good book, but it was still long enough for her to find Golden fast asleep in her bed. She settled in next to him, and before she knew it, there was nothing but starry sky outside the winders. Once she finished the chapter she was on, she bookmarked the page, set it aside, and turning off the nearby lamp. Turning to her little coin bag, she could just barely tell that her sudden movement had stirred him into a just barely awake state.

Smiling to herself, she pushed herself towards him and wrapped her legs around him. He returned with his own hug as they wordlessly shut their eyes, ready to sleep the night away and greet a new day...

...And then she felt something nice, warm, and very wrong spraying with a hissing noise at her legs. She opened her eyes to Golden's just barely visible face, which was completely flooded with embarrassment. "Uh... I guess I forgot how thin water was compared to chocolate?"

It would take three consecutive days of staying dry on the couch with a blanket and pillow before Lily would let him back in bed with her. But he succeeded, and that night had been the best night of the two ponies' lives as they slept while wrapped around each other.

Author's Note

I can't say I expected this to be nearly 9k works long when I first started writing it, but at the same time I definitely like it the way it is, at least for a first chapter. It gives a good sample of everything I'd want to be present in a series like this, with a good mix of silliness, seriousness, intrigue, and weird fetish clop.