GET ON THE BAG!

by Peni Parker

Rating: teen
Tags: Romance, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Profanity, Equestria Girls, Spitfire, Sunset Shimmer, Soarin
Length: 1180

Spitfire is coaching the CHS baseball team for a game, and Soarin won't get on the bag.

It's the biggest baseball game of the season for CHS and Spitfire is coaching the team. Everything seems to be going well except for one thing; Soarin won't get on the bag.

Cover art by baekgup

Published 2019-08-06 17:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-08-06 17:10:01 UTC

GET ON THE BAG!

Author's Note

I had so much fun writing my last SNL inspired story that I decided to do another one. This one is also partially inspired by a certain scene from The Washouts.

Tanoshinde!

GET ON THE BAG!

It was the biggest baseball game of the season; Canterlot High School vs. Crystal Prep Academy. It wasn’t just big because of the rivalry between the two schools, it was also the game where the coaches let the team captains take the reins. In other words, the team captains were the coaches for this game.

Spitfire was coaching the CHS team, and she was doing a damn good job. Thanks to her leaderships and baseball expertise CHS was winning 3-1 in the top of the 4th inning with no runners on base and no outs. Soarin was currently up to bat with 2 balls and 1 strike.

“Come on Soarin, you can do it,” Spitfire encouraged her player from the dugout, “just wait for your pitch.”

The pitcher threw the ball and Soarin managed to make contact, sending the ball into shallow right field. He got to first base easily but held their as the right fielder threw the ball to second base to prevent Soarin’s hit becoming a double.

“Good job, Soarin, good job,” Spitfire continued to encourage.

“Wow, Soarin’s shown some improvement since last game, don’t you think?” Sunset Shimmer commented.

“Oh yeah,” Spitfire agreed, “At first I thought he was going to be liability in this game but he’s really showing his stuff today.”

“No doubt because of your awesome leadership,” Rainbow Dash chimed in.

Spitfire felt a tiny blush appear on her face from Rainbow’s compliment.

“Yeah, well, I don’t know about that,” she replied, trying to sound as humble as possible.

Fleetfoot was up to bat next, and as she entered the batter’s box Soarin took a few steps off of first base for a small lead in case she hit the ball.

“No outs, Soarin, get on the bag,” Spitfire called out.

“I’m serious,” Rainbow Dash continued, “You’re a born leader. You just have this way of inspiring others to be their best.”

Spitfire was now starting to feel a bit embarrassed by Rainbow’s praise.

“I mean, I do try to lead by example,” she stated, “I find what when you give 110% others will follow.”

“I don’t think it’s possible to give more than 100%...” Sunset began to say before Spitfire spoke up again.

“Get on the bag, Soarin,” she called out, having noticed that he’d taken a small lead off of first base again.

“Well I don’t literally mean 110%,” Spitfire clarified as she turned back to Sunset, “I just mean that you have to give it your all.”

“I know what you mean,” Rainbow interjected, “I always try to…”

“GET ON THE BAG!” Spitfire flat out yelled at Soarin.

Rainbow Dash and Sunset looked at each other for quick second, as if to confirm with one another that they’d just heard Spitfire yell at one of her players like that.

“So, um, how are things with your mom?” Sunset inquired, trying to shake of what’d just happened as a one-time outburst.

“She’s fine,” Spitfire answered, “She had some difficulty getting around for about a week after the surgery…SOARIN, GET ON THE DAMN BAG!” she yelled again as she turned her attention back to first base, “but she’s really recovering well.” She concluded, as if her sudden outburst hadn’t just happened.

At this point both Rainbow and Sunset were beginning to get a bit uncomfortable. They wanted to say something but didn’t dare risk saying anything that might make Spitfire even angrier.

“Hey, uh, Soarin,” Rainbow Dash spoke up, “Maybe you should listen to Spitfire and stay close to first base, huh?”

“G-glad to hear your mom’s doing well,” Sunset said, trying once again to divert Spitfires attention from Soarin for a while.

“Yeah, thanks for asking, Sunset…HEY, SOARIN, YOU TRYING TO MAKE AN ASS OF ME?! GET ON THE BAG!” Spitfire suddenly exploded.

Sunset turned to the bleachers where Coach Rider, the faculty baseball coach, was sitting. He’d been watching the dugout as Spitfire continuously berated her player and hadn’t done anything so far. Sunset gave him a look that silently indicated she thought he should so something about Spitfire. Picking on what Sunset was trying to communicate, he simply shook his head ‘No’ with an expression of fear on his face.

“Say, I could go for a sports drink, anyone else want a sports drink?” Rainbow said with a small amount of nervousness in her voice.

“No thanks, Dash,” Spitfire replied as she leaned down and picked up a bottle lying next to her, “I got my own sports drink right here.”

She opened the bottle and took a five second swig from it.

“Ah, that’s the stuff,” Spitfire commented.

“What’s in that?” Sunset curiously asked.

“It’s my own special concoction,” Spitfire explained, “Two-thirds Red Bull, one-third Jack Daniels.”

Sunset and Rainbow once again looked at each other in disbelief. They not only couldn’t believe that Spitfire was drinking alcohol, they also couldn’t believe she’d just freely admitted it so nonchalantly.

“I WILL HANDCUFF YOU TO A BEDPOST AND WHIP YOUR ASS IF YOU DON’T GET ON THE BAG, SOARIN! NOW GET. ON. THAT. BAG!” Spitfire yelled, getting Sunset’s and Rainbow’s attention again.

“Soarin, everything’s going to be fine pal, just get on the bag, please?” Rainbow pleaded as calmly as she could.

Just then Fleetfoot swung at a pitch and missed, making her count now 2 balls and 2 strikes.

“It’s alright, Fleetfoot,” Spitfire reassured her friend, “You’ve got this, just focus…HEY, SOARIN, HOW DUMB DO THINK I AM?! NOW GET ON THE BAG, GET ON THE GODDAMN FUCKING BAG!” she berated once more.

“Alright, that’s enough!” The umpire finally spoke up.

Rainbow Dash and Sunset breathed a sigh of relief, happy that the umpire was finally taking action, though they couldn’t help but wonder why he’d waited so long.

“You need to calm down right now or I’m throwing you out of the game!” the umpire threatened.

“Gotcha, ump, calming down,” Spitfire said as she put both her hands up, signifying she understood the umpire’s warning loud and clear.

For the rest of the game Spitfire managed to keep her cool.

After the game, Rainbow Dash caught up with Soarin outside the locker rooms to make sure he was alright after Spitfire’s numerous outbursts.

“Hey, Soarin,” she called out to him, “you okay after all that?”

“Uh, yeah, I’m fine,” Soarin replied, almost as if he didn’t know what Rainbow was talking about.

To Rainbow’s surprise, Soarin seemed completely unfazed by the large amount of verbal abuse that had been thrown at him.

“You sure?” Rainbow inquired, just to be sure, “Spitfire got pretty intense out there.”

“Oh, I’m used to that,” Soarin clarified.

“Really?” Rainbow asked in disbelief.

“Yeah,” Soarin continued, “Though the only place she usually gets that intense is in bed.”

And with that little piece of knowledge, Rainbow Dash simply walked away.