A Critical Failure

by Lucy_Marigold

Rating: teen
Tags: Crossover, Profanity, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dungeons and Dragons, Alternate Universe, Human, Original Character, Comedy, Suicide / Self Harm
Length: 2454

A birthday game of D&D gone-wrong leads young teenager, Lillian Marigold, to a terribly comedic situation with her life.

My name is Lillian Marigold. I’m a sixteen-year-old female who lives in the stormy city of Melbourne, Victoria, Australia and I’m no longer human.

A birthday game of Dungeons and Dragons gone-wrong threw my life upside down. And now shit has hit the fan and now I’m not only a pony. No, I’m a fucking Alicorn.

My terrible life just got a tad bit worse.

(Spoilers in Desc. for the first chapter.)

Published 2019-08-09 09:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-08-09 09:40:01 UTC

Chapter 1 - Happy Birthday.

Author's Note

A/N This has been created from a very very strange dream I had and my latest personal D&D sessions. Things sometimes get really strange.

Chapter 1 - Happy Birthday.

Chapter 1 - Happy Birthday.

I stifled a yawn as I glared at my alarm clock. I slammed a hand against it, too tired to check the actual time. The warmth from my blanket was too inviting that I desperately tried to snuggle back into my pillows that sat waywardly. I hadn’t moved my curtains so a thin beam of light pierced through, peacefully glowing across my side.

I let loose a groan, finally pressing a button on my clock to see the time light up in blue LEDs, 9:33 flashing in my face. I jerked up, my hair tumbling around as I grabbed the closet hair tie and bond the curly frenzy. “Shit. Shit. Shit. I’m gonna be late.” I hissed, rushing towards a nearby draw. Rummaging around, I pulled out a pair of jeans before slipping them on and chucking a t-shirt that had been laying on the ground nearby onto my chest.

I wouldn’t call myself a hoarder, more of a collector of many things. I scrambled around my cluttered dresser looking for my dice bag. I grabbed it, placing it down on my bed before rushing around once more.

I scrambled around the room, sifting through a pile of bags to pull out a moderately sized satchel with black clips. I grabbed the red folder that sat on the vanity. I glanced into the mirror, pausing for a moment. My chestnut brown eyes looked tired. The bags under my eyes signifying that I hadn’t slept in days which was true. I was too busy to even sit down for a while. I realized I had acquired a couple of new freckles, the spots dotting my nose and face.

I jerked my head away from my reflection, stuffing the folder into my bag as I tumbled around the room to grab a few more items. My headphones flew into the bag along with my lavender coloured dice bag. I rubbed the back of my neck, feeling like I was forgetting something. I glanced down at my feet to notice I was only wearing socks.

“Oh. Shoes. Right.” I muttered, instantly searching for my runners.

Sitting down on the bed, I slipped my ratty shoes on and tied the laces up hastily. I check my clock on last time as I exited my bedroom.

The kitchen was the thing that greeted my first. Earthy tiles under my feet as I wandered towards the fridge. The TV was abuzz with a pre-recorded game of netball as my mother sat there watching it. “Morning, Lillian. Happy Birthday.” She greeted, peering over her shoulder to see me standing behind the old couch. She was clutching a cup of coffee, the cat curled up on her lap.

“Mornin’ Mum. I gotta get to Alex’s for D and D. It’s at his place this time.” I carefully manoeuvred myself towards the fridge, jerking it open as I peer inside. Just because it was my birthday, it didn’t mean I wanted to be treated like a princess. Left-overs and fresh fruits were the first things that greeted me. I shut it closed, as I pulled out the jug of juice.

“Did you-”

“Yes, Mum. I cleaned my room,” I let loose, exasperated. I grabbed a glass from a nearby cupboard and poured myself a drink. The jug went onto the bench with a clunk. My mother had stopped watching her game. I checked the clock on the oven, gulping down the acidic yet surgery orange juice in a few gulps.

“Be back before five.” My mother said sternly, looking at me with slight disagreement. My mother was different from me in many ways. A woman of forty-nine years, she was shorter than me yet that didn’t mean she didn’t have power above me. With her reddish-brown hair that curled up randomly in places, it was no wonder where I got my frizziness. Her green eyes held decades of knowledge. She was just like my father in some ways but her personality was nothing like mine. She clearly didn’t enjoy my nerdish escapades that occurred weekly.

“Alright. I will.” With that, I hoisted my bag up higher, picking my phone off the bench, I wander through the kitchen until I entered the living room. “Bye Dad, I’m off to D and D.” I greeted my father as I walked past him, the older man watching TV on the couch. He grumbled a reply as I opened the door, stepping outside. The fall air was crisp but it wasn’t as cold as other states.

I lifted my phone up to my face as I stepped down the small steps of my front porch. Walking down the street and around corners until I couldn’t even see my street anymore.

The screen reflected the shine of the sun, blinding me for a second.

I scrolled through my notifications as I saw a missed call from someone. I unlocked the phone as I opened the phone application. A single missed call highlighted with red text greeted me. I pulled out my headphones, slipping the blue earmuffs over my head as I plugged them in. Pressing the button, I heard the ringing through the headphones.

‘Hey.’ A familiar voice spoke through the speaker. ‘I was going to call you to wish you a Happy Birthday but I missed you the first time.’

“Morning Alexander. That’s sweet of you. I’m walking over to your place now. I woke up late again.” I answered back. I heard a laugh through the receiver as Alex snorted.

‘Of course, you slept in.’ Alex chuckled in response.

Alexander and I had only been friends for a single year but we were already closer than some. I had been introduced to him by my best friend, Jamison. And after that first day, it had only been a matter of time until Alex had asked me out. “Yeah. I know. I’m walking up Roseland road now, Alex.”

Pausing in my thoughts, I glanced at my neighbourhood around me. It was a rather gloomy day in all honesty. My area wasn’t that glamorous, nothing like the rich side where Alex lived. I continued my walk, heading up the hill. ‘I hate that street. Don’t stay there too long.’

As I was climbing, I spotted something strange. Something out of place. A box sat on the side of the path, sitting on a nature strip under a tree. Boxes were occasionally littered around the area but I had never seen one placed under a tree in my sixteen years of life. I paused, wondering if I was curious enough to open it and peer inside. ‘You still there?’ Alex questioned, his voice echoing through the headphones. I didn’t respond.

Kneeling down, I opened the box, biting my lip as I gripped the cardboard edges. What was inside surprised me a little. A cloudy plastic box sat inside. I pulled it out, examining it for a moment before I realized what it was. A dice box. I had seen many throughout my collecting of dice. I lifted the lid off. ‘Lily? Are you there?’ Alex questioned again. This time, I answered.

“Yeah. I just ran into something. I’ll be there soon.” I pulled out my phone, hanging up on Alex as I looked at the dice inside. I bit my lip, tipping the small objects onto the palm of my hand. None of them were matching, rather they were an array of colours. I lifted the d20 up to my eyes, glancing at the lavender coloured die. It was slightly transparent, small bits of glitter on the inside. The gold paint used to mark the numbers looked clean and professionally made. Where had they come from? I thought, glancing at the area around me. Ordinary homes that were relatively normal lined every street. With a gulp, I slipped the dice back into their box and placed that inside my satchel.

I pressed play on my music as I continued up the hill, my bag bumping against my side.

I rapped my knuckles against the wood of the door, fixing my hair as I gingerly glanced through the window. The door swung open and I was instantly grabbed into a tight embrace. A taller figure had gotten me into a hug, her chestnut brown hair covering my eyes. “Oi, Rose. Get off me.” I chuckled, pushing the girl off of me.

Rose smiled at me, adjusting her glasses that framed her earthy green eyes. “Sorry. I couldn’t help myself. Happy Birthday, Lily.” Rose was two years younger than me, the teenager smarter than me in some respect. She, just as I, had a deep love for musical theatre. Sometimes, people mistook us for siblings. “Oh and, nice ‘My Little Pony’ Shirt.”

And there were the lighthearted insults.

Rose dragged me over towards the dining table where Alex was rapidly shuffling through sheets of paper. Alex darted towards me, forgetting his papers before grabbing me into a hug and giving me a peck on the check. “Nice to see you finally. What happened-”

“Dammit James!” Rose’s voice shrieked from the kitchen nearby. She stood in the doorway as she pointed towards her brother who peaked his head from the kitchen. “James accidentally split water on my hair!” We all let loose a laugh as Alex left to grab a towel.

“James you big idiot.” I chuckled out. Alexander returned a second later, thrusting the cloth into Rose’s hands as the teenager stroked the water out.

“Hey, Lily, how’s it hanging?” James spoke, lifting a bottle of soft drink out which he set on the table as Alex resumed his organisation.

I had known James for longer than any of my friends. I had met him on my first day of highschool. We had been friends ever since, even after I moved schools. James was taller than his sister, taller than Alexander even. He towered above us. James was the big brother I wish I had despite him being the exact age as me.

“Uh. Sixteen. Still unemployed. Anyway, what’s been up with you?” I sat myself down in a chair, chuckling as Alex smiled back and moved the papers from my spot. I removed my character sheet and dice bag, the one I found while walking tumbling out as I did so.

“Did you get new dice?” Alex asked, picking the object up. “And why aren’t they matching?”

“I, uh, found them.” I gulped out, glancing at James as he finally sat down.

“You found them? Cool.” Rose had intervened, snatching the box from Alexander’s hands. The teenager glared at Rose as she finally sat down, leaning in her chairs as she turned them around. Alex sat at the head of the table, motioning for Rose to return my dice.

“Give Lily her dice back, Rose.” Begrudgingly, Rose passed the box back. I stared at the dice for a second, a sudden urge to use these rather than my normal dice. I took them out of their container, placing them on the table.

“Right, so where we left off, Angelica was captured by a wizard and his goblin army. They have fled and you don’t know where they have gone. What do you do?” Alex began, smirking as he looked at them from behind the Dungeon Master’s board.

“I bet we could track them,” Rose commented, looking at her skills for a moment.

“It’s night, remember?” James mentioned, completely fudging any plans Rose may have had.

“That what we get for making human characters for once. Anyway, I’m pretty sure I can transform into an animal that can see in the dark.” I groaned, thumbing through my sheets.

“That’s a great idea.” My best friend smiled in response. That was all the approval I needed.

“Roll a d20,” Alex said, glancing up and down at his own sheets. I picked up the first d20 I could see, the purple one from the mystery kit. I rolled it against the table, the small thing twirling to a stop on a single number. A one.

“Haha! A critical failure…” James had begun to taunt until they realized something was wrong with the die. It emitted a bright magenta glow as sparks flew. “What the fuck is going on?!” He shouted, jerking from his sheet. Alex peered from over his DM barrier as the die began to spin by itself.

“What the fuck?!” Both Rose and I shout in tandem, jolting away from our seats. Without thinking, I grabbed the die as it rolled off the table. A bright and blinding flash of white light burst from it. I couldn’t see anything, the entire room vanished to nothing along with my arms and hands. I let loose a scream that no one could hear over the intense buzz from the die.

I stirred awake after what felt like forever, a painful headache pounding down on my skull. I scrunched my face up as I looked at myself. That’s when the panic began to set in. Where were my hands?! Why- I wanted to shout out but all that came out was a scream as I stumbled up. “AHH!” My friends screamed in response.

“Why are you-AHH!” I finally glanced at myself, lavender coloured fur coated my body. My hands, no longer there, were replaced with hooves. I fell backwards, landing on my bottom as I screwed my eyes closed. I kept telling myself this was just an elaborate prank and when I opened my eyes my friends would shout ‘Surpise!’.

“Lily? That you?” Alexander’s voice cut through the haze. “I don’t want to freak you out anymore, but you’re kinda a horse.” I peeked an eye open, looking at the person hovering above me. Of course, I was, it was obvious at this point. The question was, how? My breathing slowly returned to normal and I gained the courage to open both of my eyes.

“Uh, what kinda horse?” I asked, looking up at Alex and Rose. James was frozen in the corner, rapidly googling something on his phone.

“Well, for one, you’re purple,” Rose commented, pointing out another obvious point.

“I got that part.” I bitterly snapped, stumbling to get up. What greeted me was a shield of feathers. Wings. I had wings. I could only get worse from here. “Fucking hell. I have wings. Holy shit. Please don’t, uh.” As I spoke, I raised a hoof towards my forehead, feeling what I shouldn’t. A unicorn horn. “Oh fuck. I’m an Alicorn.”

Chapter 2 - Unplanned Stumble.

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