We'd taken our challenge a step further and decided to order for each other—with the caveat that we wouldn't order any meat from a land critter. For Riley, I'd ordered a fish I hoped would be full of tiny bones she'd have to pick out, while she'd ordered a lobster for me.

The salad starters went down well, and we both enjoyed them despite the two goons' looks. They knew we weren't this useless, but the waiter looked mortified when we leaned down and started eating from the plates.

"What are you two doing?" Trev asked.

"Being idiots, mostly," I said while chewing on the last leaf of my salad. "You know, playing up being ponies turned into humans. I don't know how to use hands."

"That's ten points for explaining the game," Riley said.

I turned to look at her. "We never agreed on that rule."

We stared at each other for a good minute before we both cracked up laughing. There was something good about supporting each other though this. No matter what happened, we were both still ourselves. We were ponies pretending to be upright monkeys.

Our giggles continued until our main courses came out. They set down a block of wood on one side and a rice dish on the other. "Butter-poached lobster with a lobster risotto." They moved over to Riley and put down a plate with a salmon steak on the side of a plate with some kind of sauce, rice, and red vegetables too. "Crispy salmon filet with a potato and herb mash and roasted tomatoes with a light vinaigrette."

Okay, not rice. That potato must have been mashed really fine. Damn, now I wanted to try her salmon. "That looks delicious."

"We're going to ruin these meals if we try this, aren't we?" Riley asked.

"Yeah. Okay, game's over. We both won." I leaned over, my nose telling me how amazing that fish was. "Can I try a bit of that?"

"If I can have a piece of your lobster."

On the block of wood, the lobster meat was laid out perfectly, but it was missing all the enclosing shell. At the front of it, the head sat looking up at me. "You want the head?" I lifted it up and realized it was empty. "Oh, that's empty. Well, want a leg?"

"Sure, here you are." Riley used her hands to shovel a piece of the salmon onto my block of wood and speared one of the pincers to gather up some of the lobster for herself.

While we ate, the two goons got their own meals delivered. We chatted about this and that—mostly the food. Trev wanted to know more about what it was like to live on a different world and Mike seemed more interested in asking about what Dad was doing.

Our waitress, whenever she came to the table, wouldn't stop stealing looks at Riley or me. When we got to dessert, I caught her looking at me in a far different way than she was looking at Riley.

"Apple pie served à la Mode with a vanilla bean ice cream and drizzled with apple caramel, for all four." The waitress carefully placed each of our plates down, but mine I noticed something extra. There was a small piece of paper folded under one edge of my plate.

When she left, Trev snorted. "Look under your plate. I'll bet you just got her cell number."

"Yeah. She was looking at both of us, but she didn't seem to be able to get her eyes off me for long." It was exciting. How could it not be? As a pony I didn't even have the urges that were making me grin right now. I started eating my pie. "Do you think I should call her?"

"Eww. Saf, I'm probably only going to tell you this once. You could do better." Riley took a fork-load of the pie and started chewing it before she pointed it back at her plate. "This isn't half bad."

"I mean, she was kinda cute, for a human." I stopped in my tracks the moment I realized what I'd said. For a human implied that I thought a pony of equal beauty would be superior. Mentally, I put the waitress and Sudden on a platform together and looked at each. "Huh…"

"Did my big brother just realize he likes ponies more than girls?" Her tone implied that Riley wasn't going to let this go anytime soon. "Because that's what that sounded like."

"I… I guess I kinda do." I speared more pie and chewed on it thoughtfully for a moment, apparently joined by the rest since they didn't cut in. I thought about those two images—waitress and Sudden Turn—and it became quickly apparent what it was. "I think I'm into wings."

"Chicken wings?" Mike asked.

Riley and Trev both laughed.

I rolled my eyes at them all. "No. I mean I'm into pegasi. I tried to picture Miss Free-With-Her-Number and a friend from back home, and when I tried to look at them both and think what makes me look at one and not the other, it was her wings."

"Not her butt?" Mike asked. "Or her—her chest?"

Shaking my head, I let out a sigh and reviewed my mental image. "Definitely her wings. I could count every feather on them and tell you what every single one does. I can even tell you how soft they are."

"Good luck, Earth girls, this guy's got it for bits you don't even have." Trev speared some of his dessert with his fork. "They never even stood a chance."

I continued to eat my pie in silence, as did the others. When I finished it, and despite everything I'd said about wings, I drew the piece of paper out from under the plate and looked at it. It said, "Call me," and was followed by a phone number.

Folding it, I tucked it in my pocket. Would I call her? Maybe. I don't know. She looked in her 20s, maybe early in them, which made her older than me here, but even thinking of myself as the pegasus colt I felt like made me shudder a little.

How messed up was it that that was now working in reverse?

"I'll just take those away. Can I get you anything else?" She sounded like she was smiling and genuinely happy. I turned my head to look up at her and saw a young woman who looked very pretty—for a human.

"I, uh." Saf, get a hold of yourself and do this like an adult. "Do you know if the hotel has a bar, and what time it might open?" Smooth.

Her face lit up to a whole new level of happiness. It felt nice to have put that smile there. "Sure. There's one just out the door and to your left. I believe it starts to get interesting in about an hour."

"Thanks. I guess I'll see how interesting it gets." I couldn't help but smile back. There was something about just honestly talking to people that seemed to make them happy and excited.

My brain began to shift gears into human mode, and all of Dad's warnings rushed in. I needed condoms. If this was going to get interesting-interesting, well, I wanted to be ready for any kind of interesting.

"Could you bring the check?" Trev asked.

Hearing someone else speak snapped her out of her daydream. She turned to Trev and nodded. "Certainly sir."

While Trev and the woman organized payment, Mike turned away from us and spoke so softly I couldn't hear him. I turned my attention to Riley.

"I guess you don't need me to hang around while you're with a girl." If Riley had a crest, it'd be fallen. She looked down at the floor.

It took less than half a second to toss away my plans. "Hey, if it's that boring I'll ditch her and come up to our suite. There was a few games consoles hooked up, I figure we can find something to play."

Riley's head shot up to look at me. "What? You'd do that for me?"

"Of course. Remember, we're the only two ponies here except for Mom and Dad, and they don't count because they're adults. I'll be 10 minutes, tops."

If she'd been an earth pony still, Riley would have knocked me over and then some. As it was I was a lot more solid than she was here and caught her with one arm around her back to deliver the hug she was giving me. Was this crazy? Not according to how I felt. Riley was family, and family was important.

"W-Why don't you ask if she wants to play too? I-I know she wants to—to play adult games, but she'll probably be sad if you just turn her down."

I thought about it for a second. It would give me a chance to get a little more relaxed around girls here, and there'd be no pressure. Plus I could chase down some condoms later. "I'll ask her. I don't think she'll want to stick around to play CoD or whatever's popular now, but it won't hurt to ask."

"Hell if I can figure you out," Trevor said. "You get a girl who wants to—to have some fun with you, and you ditch her to play video games with your sister?" He stumbled only when he realized he would say something that Riley probably shouldn't hear.

I mean, I guess that was true. It'd be nice to get laid, but there were more important things. "A year ago you'd have been right. I was kinda girl-crazy when I wasn't trying to be cool and disinterested in everything. I'm different now."

"I'll say." Riley smirked at me. "You know the day before we had to leave he had a girl in his room? My brother's pretty awesome most of the time, but sometimes he's a bit stupid."

"Hey!"

"Just calling it like it is. You used to be all crazy whenever your friend Candy visited." She stuck her tongue out at me.

She was right, though. Candy was kinda fun to be with, but I did get kinda distracted by her. For a brief moment I wondered what she might be doing now, but the answer was obvious—she'd be on break and getting ready for college.

Did Wonderbolts training count as college? I knew there were jocks that went to college just to play sport, but Wonderbolts training was nothing like that. Was it?

Riley Ree

It was way too much fun ribbing Saf, but when I saw him actually look worried, I clinked my spoon on my plate. He looked up at me with those big—Okay, they weren't big, cute eyes. Ponies had big cute eyes, but Saf's right now looked like he was worried about something.

I wouldn't normally worry about what Saf's feeling so much, but right now us ponies had to stick together. "What's up?"

"I was thinking about what Candy would be doing, which made me think of college, and…" He reached up to his feathered braid. "You know how jocks go to college and do sport? Do you think Junior Wonderbolts Academy is like that?"

"You're only asking me 'cos I'm smart, aren't you?"

"More like you'll tell me the truth."

I giggled and reached out my hand to poke him in the ribs. "I can do even better than answer this for you."

He looked more curious than upset now. "What?"

"Okay, let me put it a better way. How does a pegasus fly in still air?" I knew the answer because I'd been studying everything lately. Anything with four legs at least. There was so much about ponies themselves to study.

"In still air? Most pegasi would tuck their primaries and use the lift gained by their secondary feathers. Glide to conserve energy then give a few flaps to regain altitude."

I stared at him in what I hoped was a good deadpan expression. He just kept looking back at me.

It seemed he needed more. "And how does pegasus magic affect clouds?"

"It interacts between our hooves and the moist air, creating an arc of travel for the magic to flow and—" Bam. He finally got it. He stared at me like I was a genius and he was maybe, kinda starting to get on my level.

Then his shock broke into a smile and he reached out and grabbed me. It might have been really odd to see brothers and sisters of our ages hug like this in public, but it made the pony I was in my heart happy to get a big hug and to hug him back. "See? You're not a jock, Saf. You're way too smart for that."

"Ponies forever, right?"

I laughed. "Absolutely. Hoof-bump." I pulled back from the hug and held up my fist. It wasn't exactly a hoof, but it was close enough.

"Right on." He bumped my fist with his own. "I'll go see if she's there yet. You want anything to drink?"

"Sure. Some of Sweet Apple Acres best light cider." I kinda regretted saying it. We'd only had it once, and that once had spoiled every other sweet drink ever.

"We gotta wait until we get back for that. I'll find something for us to take upstairs." He stood up and reached out to ruffle my hair, then walked off in the direction he'd been told. Mike stood up too and walked after him.

"I guess that's why they sent two of you?" I asked Trevor Lane.

"Yeah. We have to keep an eye out for anything bad happening to either of you. You know, I only knew one big brother myself, but I don't think he ever looked up to me or my sister."

"It's just how we are. You should see it when we're back home. He's bigger than me still, but he's a pegasus and I'm an earth pony, so I'm a lot stronger than he is even at my size. It was a little unnerving when we got back here to realize how much I relied on that strength." I reached out for a bread roll that was in a basket on the table and grabbed one of them.

"Really settled in there, huh?"

I looked up at him as if he was crazy, because he was. "Well, yeah. Firstly, you take the biggest wishes of every little girl—to be around ponies all the time and meet a real life princess. That happened on day one. Things got more awesome from there."

"You like it more than here?"

"Yeah. I mean, I have friends there, and we're going to be there for a bit. I know it's going to take forever for me to grow up there, but that just means more time to be a kid." When my answer made him look confused, I had to wonder how much people knew about it. "You know how aging works different there, right?"

"I heard something about it. What's so different?"

Thinking back, I couldn't remember when an adult human had spoken to me like this—as if I wasn't just a little kid but had something worth hearing. "Well, I'm almost thirteen, right?" I waited for him to nod. "That's how old a foal is who's just starting their second year of school. So rather than junior high, I'd be stuck learning to write my name and count to five."

"That bad? I thought it was just like a few years or something." He grabbed a bread roll as well and started picking at it. "So when would you have graduated?"

"Their idea of high school is really slow going. They learn all kinds of job things and get to go out and try working at jobs—all to get their cutie marks and find their special talent." Lifting up my own roll, I paused just before taking a bite to say, "Fifty. I'd have another 37 years of school."

"And you want to go back to that? How old do ponies get?"

I had to chew hard to get the mouthful of bread down and then needed a drink. Why do I have to wait to have a good cider? Grabbing a glass of water I got the impending hiccups to stop before they even started. "Yeah. I mean, I get to study a lot, and I kinda like that. Ponies get really old. 200 to 250 is pretty normal, although I know a pony, Granny Smith, who is almost 300."

"You're shitting me?" When I raised an eyebrow at him, Trevor Lane seemed to barely notice it. "What do they do with all that? Do they get bored of life?"

"You're asking someone at the wrong end of things. Also, watch your language around little fillies."

He actually blushed at that, though I don't think it was because of the first bit. We sat in silence for a few minutes before Saffron returned. He didn't have a drink with him, but Mike was walking along behind.

"Come on, Riley. Let's head up. The guy at the bar said he'd have room service send up some drinks. Kaylee said she'll meet us in the lift. I think it might be that fascination thing again, but she seemed interested in playing some video games with us."

I put the rest of my bread on my plate and stood up. "She, uh, knows I'll be there, right?"

"Yeah, I told her you'd be playing too. If it's a problem for her, it's a problem for me." Saf really said the best stuff sometimes. We walked to where all the lifts were—with Mike and Trevor following—and just before we started stepping into one the woman Saf had been talking to walked up and stepped in with us.

"Riley, this is Kaylee. Kaylee, Riley's my little sister."

"You're a pony too, right? Like from the video with the president?" Kaylee definitely seemed excited enough to count as fascinated, but I remembered how that other girl was with our running.

I needed and resolved to make a new friend. After all, that was the pony way. "Sure am! It's still odd getting used to walking like this again, but the running we did earlier helped."

"Ugh. I am so jealous. I hate working this job, but you know how it is trying to get work and—I wish I could be a pony too."

Funnily, it was Saf who broke first and replied. "You know ponies need to work too, right? They have waiters and restaurants and—"

"Yeah, but I'd be a pony! A pegasus or a unicorn! It'd be amazing!"

Okay, now she had to be put in her place. "What about earth ponies?"

"You mean the ones without wings or a horn? I—I guess I didn't really think about them. What can they do?" Kaylee at least didn't think earth ponies weren't amazing straight away. She wasn't a total loss.

"Earth ponies," Saffron said, "are the greatest. They're strong as ten pegasi, can lift twice whatever a unicorn can with their horn, and they have hearts the size of a house."

"I thought you were a pegasus?"

"I am, but earth ponies and unicorns are great. My dad's a unicorn, and Mum and Riley are earth ponies. Riley is stronger than I am in Equestria—and I'm like twice her size!"

This wasn't right, though. He was cheering on earth ponies and unicorns, but was neglecting pegasi. "Saffron is leaving out that pegasi are awesome. They're faster than the wind and help keep the weather in Equestria from going crazy all the time."

"Then there's the dragons. We're best buds with a dragon named Spike. He's a librarian," Saffron said.

"And alicorns," I said. "Alicorns are when a pony has all three races in them. There's a few alicorns, but only one that was born an alicorn. Princess Flurry Heart." She'd told me not to use her full title when talking to her, but this wasn't talking to her. Besides, she was a princess and everyone should know that.

"But wouldn't you only need to combine a pegasus and unicorn to get a pony that looks like all three?" The lift was riding up and was almost at our stop, and her questions were starting to bug me just a little.

"What? Of course not. You can have the creativity and magic of a unicorn and the speed and loyalty of a pegasus, but without the heart and strength of an earth pony you wouldn't be an alicorn. There's a ton of other little things each race can do that's special. Like, Riley can talk to trees." Saffron stepped out of the lift when it stopped and made room for us to follow.

"Talk to trees? How does that even work?"

I giggled as I stepped out. "Very slowly. What's more fun is that they listen, and you can ask them to do things. Usually it takes some magic to convince them, but the one we found today was too scared to grow properly, and I managed to convince it that it was safe."

"No way! What happened?"

"It used the stored energy to grow. The poor thing was terrified if it got too big, bad things would happen. It didn't realize there was a literal army of people trying to help it grow." Well, I hoped there was. It seemed like the gardens around there were important.

"You mean it's going to grow now, right?" She looked a little confused. "Not like, grow-grow right away."

Saf opened the door to our suite and led the way inside. "What? No, she means it literally grew right there. Gained a few feet, right?"

His reinforcing of my story made me want to puff out my chest and strut a little, though I think that'd look a little silly for a human to do. "Right. It had so much energy that I didn't need to use any magic on it. Plants can grow really quick when they want to."

"What's it like there though? The pony world, I mean. Ponies seem really awesome, but I don't know if I'd want to, like, go there." The change in topic annoyed me a little, but it was jumping from one of my favorite topics to another.

Settling down on the couch, Saf pulled out a remote bigger than my head and started looking over it. "Well, the first thing you gotta realize is that the most crazy part of being there is that you're a pony. Forget hands and feet, you're all leg and bright colors. It gets twice as confusing if you become a pegasus."

"Saf couldn't walk properly for weeks. He kept getting his wings mixed up with his forelegs," I said as I jumped up on the couch beside him. I figured he'd probably want a little bit of contact with Kaylee, so left room for her to sit between us.

"Oh, yeah. I was so confused. It was like… Okay, imagine if your arms turn into legs and you grow new arms. You kinda know how arms are meant to work, but these ones are wired up all wrong. So there you are, whenever you try to move an 'arm' you fall over." The TV finally came on and Saf started punching other buttons. "It took a lot of work to work it out, and it was partly a really clever trick."

Spotting the game controllers in a little rack beside the TV, I jumped up and grabbed three of them. "Here you go."

That's when I realized what might be wrong with having her sit between us. If she was getting hit with that pony-whammy effect, now she was getting a double dose. Well, that's what she was here for, right? I passed the controllers to Saf and her, then jumped back up on the couch as Saf sorted out the TV.

Author's Note

To Jeff: Do you have a team researching the possibility of using magic on Earth?

"Absolutely. After witnessing some of the simpler things Riley and Saffron are capable of—to say nothing of what Philip and the team from Equestria are doing—we have spawned entire teams of researchers who now must labor under the title, Federal Department of Magic." Jeff looked particularly happy. "And that's not taking into account what wonders Equestria is actually exporting to us."

So I do this "Ask X" thing. X can be any pony within the story. You can ask them anything and they will definitely, hopefully reply. Keep the questions appropriate to the age-rating of the stories, and they will answer the best question in the author notes of the next chapter. The more votes a comment has the more likely I will get it to the right pony to answer. Try to keep it to one question per post! They will pick one question per chapter.

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